#even tho i fucked up my exam

[hellneedsaruler]

Biggest compliment paid to me : little kid on public transport was transfixed his grandpa had to physically pick him up to move

#feeling invincible #he was so polite too #and shy #i waved goodbye to him #today is not so bad #even tho i fucked up my exam #screaming into the tumblr void #random thoughts

[todayisafridaynight]

cant stress how obsessed i am with yamaguchis shirt

#snap chats #this is rgg related because i said so shut up ANYWAY #i DID steal this from twitter but i need to share it every with everyone so im not sorry #the person i stole this from rt'd a photoset from themselves and in it motomiya wearing The Silliest outfit ever #but ive already shared too much. ive already gone off topic too much we're moving on #i will bookmark it tho cause it makin me giggle #anyway if you cant read it. and id be so happy to type out what it says. #it says 'can't miss it!! you've got to go to nepal they have a big festival called Maha Shivaratri full moon night in february' #dont know why it makes me giggle it just does. like fuck man maybe i SHOULD go to nepal in february <- maha shivaratri is in march next yea #anyway everyone be nice to me today i have a spanish exam later and it Should be easy #but i was fighting god and the devil last night trying to sleep because my cramps decided to kick my ass EXTRA hard #I NEVER GET BAD CRAMPS WHYYYY DID IT HAVE TO BE BEFRE AN EXAM WHEN I NEED GOOD SLEEP !!!!!! #im lucky my spanish class is in the evening but god it was so painful #the last time i experienced pain as bad as that was when i was trying to sleep after busting my wrist #so awful.... i hurt a lil now but i'll get through it #ok bye let me study up just to reaffirm some Spanish Knowledge with myself

[oatbugs]

lmao looking at her insta highlights was a mistake

#i feel worse WHY DOES SHE HAVE TONED MUSCLES UGHHH #also my confidence has gone down a tiny bit bc why is she hanging out w all these cool ppl #how is this girl simultaneously a lawyer and also has her social life on max like give me a break #thered a photo of her walking around in heaven either before closing or after opening shes sooo #HOWEVER. i just had a call w her yesterday that made me realise my idea of romance is more romantic than her idea of romance #but also that she doesnt want to do smth super romancey on a 3rd date which according to my friends is fair but according to my heart #it is not. like why are u on a date if u dont wanna do anything romancey at that point just hang out w friends #odd of her to say that too considering our first two dated were quite romantic . anyway #yo this cafe is playing persian music nice. anyway yh #also she makes being middle eastern so gay yk the goodbye fake cheek kiss thing we do . where u like . kiss the air on the sides of the #persons face when ur saying goodbye. ygwim . yeah she doesnt do the fake air kisses she gives u two tender kisses like . anyway #i discussed the stuff she does w my friend and like why r her words so aloof and her actions so...not . and my friends reaction was #basically this is fuckboy behaviour. apparently he used to do that to girls ?? like tell them he rly liked them #and be all charming and romantic even tho he rly wasnt invested at all and he mostly wanted to hook up. like ok #im gonna kill myself then. why would u stroke my hair w my head on ur LAP THEN. WHAT IF SHE TURNS AROUND AND IS LIKE #oops it was nothing #....ill kms actually. no i womt. but anyway #also got added to the gc w the other lecturers givjng talks on the 6th so its getting more real #my friend was like did u do the script yet :))) . almost died shes so scary i love her . but . fuck two exams . crush. talk. ucl cambrdige #three conferences aaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAA im so anxious i dont even feel anything atp #......I HAVE NO MONEY!!! TO TOP IT OFF #my crush and i are both iranian (aka born w extremely expensive taste woven into our genes) but i wanna like #treat her w the entire 2 quid in my bank account ig ♡♡♡ #crushposting

[pallases]

ourgejjg

#i am feeling so ill rn for no reason and i need to shower and wash my hair so bad but i can tell if i do it rn it’ll make the #lightheadedness ten times worse and there is a nonzero chance i will just pass out in there 😭 #best guess is bc my period started today and yeah the first two days suck but they’re not usually This bad #personal #also this is the last thing i need rn it’s tech week and all rehearsals lately have been going/are going to go till 10 pm and i have no tim #to do all my assignments and my probability prof assigned a lab today that’s due TMRW AT MIDNIGHT? <- we usually get a class period btwn #it being assigned and the deadline and he’s not even giving us until the next class period to do it now like why is it due at midnight #instead of noon the next day… also i have not one but two exams immediately following this weekend and i really want to see my family for #easter but that sounds like such a bad idea im so unproductive at home and i’ll be busier than usual when i go home on top of that bc easte #and one of the exams is circuits for which exams are worth 90% of our grade and im averaging a 74% at the moment which is NOT #promising and. AAAAA #also have an exam this thursday which imnot nearly as worried abt but still. and i have to meet w someone abt a scholarship tmrw during my #free period so i Still can’t work on that stupid lab due tmrw night like. this sucks okay ‼️ #the engineering chronicles #the music chronicles #i know it was only a matter of time before musical started stressing me out but 😭 please give me back the joys of saturday’s rehearsal… #oh also there’s ANOTHER probability lab due day after easter and same day as circuits exam and the prof is the same so he knows full well #what he’s doing like. why are you not giving us the usual period in btwn for these anymore fuck you <3 #OH ALSO soldering qualification i need to do for like 3 hours wednesday the night before my thursday exam. nearly forgot abt that one i hat #it hereeee #soldering i could reschedule tho which i might do. but ive already pushed it back once so im like :/ do i really wanna do that #idk. still feel sick as fuck and still need to do physics prelab tonight 😭 it shouldn’t take long but i really don’t want to get up and #stare at my computer even more ifeel so awful rn #ANYWAY. sorry that was oversharing even for me i am just 😐 you know.

[tojiswhore-nanamisslut]

I sent so many emails today

#like 5? were to clients and 4 were to foreign attorneys and like 12 were to partners lol #sending emails to clients and FAs is always nerve wracking tho #but the partners will usually review my draft email to clients before i send it #but for FAs not so much esp if it's just a status check #but today i had to email an FA to request examination of the client's patents in Canada #and i had asked the partner if there was anything i had to do before requesting examination bc i noticed for some in the past #we had amended claims and he was like well method of treatment claims aren't allowed anywhere but the US #and we went thru it and i understood bc i mean its not difficult and then he was like “i have confidence that you understand at a high level #what to look for when telling them to cancel certain claims so go ahead and email a request for all of these and dw about #getting me to sign off but also feel free to call if you do have qs or want me to review what you wrote.“ #so i sent emails to the FA requesting exam of specific claims and terminating method claims without anyone looking it over beforehand #and oh man i was nervous but i sent the emails and the partner didn't call me to tell me i fucked up so 😭 #honestly its a compliment that he even said he had confidence in me lol this guy doesnt usually have faith in anyone ☠️ #posts

[hella1975]

i have an exam on monday but also my last exam was on the 9th. they really said 'give that little guy 2 whole weeks to prepare for a single exam' and expected me to get anything done. i havent even clocked it yet. you gave me way too much time. there is zero fear here. the Terror hasn't kicked my ass into productivity and i fear it never will. i'll fail it and come back later idc

#LIKE I CANT EVEN BLAG THIS EXAM BC IT'S IN PERSON SO THERE'S NO WAY OF CUTTING CORNERS #I /HAVE/ TO STUDY FOR IT I HAVE TO PUT THE TIME IN #AND TBH I HAVE CAUGHT UP ON ALL OF MY NOTES #AND THIS WEEKEND THE PLAN WAS TO MEMORISE THEM ALL #GOOD RIGHT? PERFECT PLAN RIGHT? IM DOING FUCKING NOTHING #IM DANCING TO NEVERENDING SONG BY CONAN GRAY AND CONTEMPLATING GOING INTO TOWN #JUST BC THE SUN IS OUT EVEN THO I KNOW I CANT SPEND ANY MONEY RN #IT'S SATURDAY SO MY MATE IS IN THE COFFEE SHOP I COULD GO RN AND HAVE A NICE LIL COFFEE SHOP SESSION #EXCEPT I CANT MEMORISE IN A COFFEE SHOP BC IT INVOLVES SAYING STUFF ALOUD #SO I KNOW ID JUST GO TO WRITE AND ACT LIKE I DONT HAVE A BIG FUCKING FINAL EXAM IN T-MINUS TWO DAYS #GIRL PLEASE #hella goes to uni

[cimicherrychanga]

SO fucked up that when u study languages they also make u study architecture history and ant biology and economy and european politics hierarchy so by the end of the semester i still cant tie a proper sentence in any language but sure i can differentiate the neo gothic style from rococo or tell you what a bull market is

#shut up dave #im tired im tired im tired i dont care abt any of this #i mean i do enjoy architecture and art periods. i dont want to be required to know all of them #i have an exam tomorrow and one on sunday and one on wednesday and one on next saturday #then on monday and tuesday and the following saturday and monday too #and frankly. im only confident i can pass 3 maybe 4 of them #for the rest??? idk ill need to study and im very bad at that #but hey we got the grades back from the first exam!! the one i took last week and i got a 9 yippeee #that is out of 10 #it was in german interpreting n like. genuinely. im good enough at consecutive interpreting that i dont think theres a way 4 me to fail #like even if i mess it up i cant do THAT bad #i had to do it 4 english today and i think i fucked up sooo big it was so embarrassing. but then we got to the critique of my performance #and. it was all the usual nitpicks? like few word choices #the occasional discordance with adjectival conjugation. few points that 'havent clearly come across' #in my mind i had missed like a whole half of the speech but apparently it was p good still #now the problem is. same prof who teaches that subject also teaches specialized languages #and im. very bad at that one for simple reason that i have not processed any information all year #um maybe next time dont make your class about the stock market? idk just a suggestion. i dont care for wallstreet or whatever. #tho to b fair i didnt care for the european parliament last year either so ig u just cant win me on those terms #but if we get to specializing on the judiciary field i think i wouldnt be able to keep ignoring it. because of the circumstances #i have two more shirt designs to finish before the month ends but as u can see school wants me dead at the same time #one of said designs is a full 7 character thing :/ #and the other. well ive already made 3 thumbnails for it and nothing rly clicks the way i want it to

[reverie-starlight]

I think it's very very very very unfair for your grade in a class to be based on 3 tests only AND to have all three tests weigh the same.

the weight of the midterms should not be equal to the weight of the final exam ESPECIALLY when you don't give us opportunities to raise our grades or actually study the material properly outside of the slides and one million pages of reading you assign. istg I'm gonna drop this class!!!!!

#reverie rambles #my personality midterms are both worth 33% #and my final exam is worth 34% #that's all we're graded on!!! #her slides are not good and most of our midterm content is apparently are “lecture only” content so if you miss even one class you're fucke #she doesn't post recordings either so if you miss something she said you're done #YET SOMEHOW SHE HAS A HIGH RATE MY PROF SCORE #no one I've met in this class likes this prof #it sucks tho cause the content is literally right up my alley #and yes ik it's my responsibility to go to class it's my money wasted if I don't #but I have a 3hr commute and a schedule I made based on the idea I'd be living on campus still #plus I'm on academic warning bc I was too depressed last year to do shit so I'm busy with my other classes this year trying to make all As #and I'm STRESSED #I feel like I don't need to justify myself but like #I also do bc for some reason people still aren't ready to wrap their minds around depression and burnout in university past the jokes #or like the 'aesthetic' of being so overworked you live on energy drinks and tears #as if there's some moral high ground you have over people who struggle the same as you and end up failing while you do fine #it's so shitty that working yourself to the bone to pass is so normalized :')

[darkredmage]

Ahaga fuck the college shit is getting wirse

#not allowed to draw and do anything i like anymore because my fucking asshole dad wants me to stop doing all this shit #because i cant even fucking finish the task he told me to do thats related to the exam #even tho #I WAS ALSO FUCKING BUSY WITH WRITING MY HOMEWORK MY TUTOR GAVE TO ME FOR THE EXACT SAME EXAM #so basically my life is now complwtely bleak and devoid of all the shit that i used to consider worth staying alive for #i dont even want to work in the animation industry anymore let alone be an artist #i fucking miss my old job i fucking miss everything i had going on before my parents decided that im not allowed to decide on my own lufe an #-d forced this future on me #i miss being able to get money #i miss being happy #ok thats a life im nefer gappy #but that was the closest thing to happiness i had #and the worst part is? im scared of what will happen if j ended up failing this exam anyways #i dont even want to join this specific college they forced me to join #in fact if the scenario of me joining college ever happened then i already know the exact place i wanted to go #BUT NAH #NO CHOICES FOR ME ONLY MY DAD'S FRIEND'S WORKPLACE (the college he works at) #I DONT EVEN WANT TK BECOME AN ARTIST ANYMORE ESPECIALLY WITH ALL THIS UNFAIR NFT AI ART SHIT #I HATE THIS I MISS WORKING AT THE BOOKSTORE #AGHH #vent

[eklipxe]

#literallly think my life is going down the fucking hill right now #started crying after therapy because i think im not doing enough #and i been having disagreements with my therapy.. #*therapist #that's why i cry because it always happens to me #that i desagree with therapist and then i cant trust them totally #i just start to get quite and barely say anything #or worst i fucking explode and miss the point completely #it's always me #always #i just loose it completly and end up regretting everything i said #oh there's also the part that my parents look at my relationship as damn joke #and i have a job interview tomorrow for smth that i dont even know where the hell to start #bpd is hitting cause im getting stressed to the point of being agressive and rude #and the only thing that keeps me calm is my gf who i cant see as often as i would like to #oh and also i have to take my driver's licence and study for arts exam ndxt year even tho i dont have a background in arts cause i learnt #on my own #so i dont fucking know where even to start #everything is getting overwhelming.....

[mishkakagehishka]

Socialisation is key, i really am just like a bunny

#felt genuinely happy and all i did was go over to my friend's flat between our lessons since she rents close by #and we had coffee and talked ab our failed loves and laughed so much and awughhhhhh #i've really been feeling off these past few months but especially these past two weeks #i don't wanna say it but i just felt like i had no meaning #and hanging out and having fun and doing paid work really managed to make me feel a bit better #and like i actually am a human being with some sort of purpose #even if it is to offer cheap and quick last minute translations or a ''DON'T FALL FOR HIM'' through laughter #sighs #idk. maybe i shouldn't let myself get consumed with anxiety and ''if i fail this then this will happen which will lead to this and that so #essentially if i fail this minor thing i'll fuck everything up and there'll be no fixing it'' but that's easier said than done #i can always distract myself tho and just do my best #i think it was during that coffee that i thought ''okay so even if i fail an exam or two - i can take them during the autumn. i don't have #to pass everything on time - few first years do - and i will still be able to rest between summer and autumn dates #so it's not like i'll be a lost cause if i don't pass everything by july's end'' but. it's still hard to think of it #but we'll see. in God's hands #we also laughed a lot bc i mentioned being religious and she went ''YOU?!'' hdbsbsbsjdjd😭😭.... is that so shocking.........

[kkujo]

school is so weird... you see the same people in the same building five days a week for the best part of a decade and even if you're not friends you know their names and faces... and then one day school ends and you just. leave. and never see most of them again ☹

#thinking about all the people who touched my life who i'll never see again #wondering about my impact #do people ever think about me #the guy who would play chess with me at lunch when my friend group started excluding me.. #the girl who came and sat with me at prom to watch the firework display even though we'd never spoken before because i was sitting alone.. #the way people impact you and then they're just gone forever. sickening #but people are kind and good. like. i have faith in humanity #there were mean people too obviously but. there's always kindness #anyways just thinking about that. like. the people i grew up with. i wasn't friends with most of them but we watched each other grow #some of the people in my class had been in the same classes as me since we were 4 ☹ and then one day you're grown up and they're gone #that prom thing was important to me tho bc prom night was literally the last time i saw everyone #bc i finished my exams the week before so. aside from going in to pick up my results #prom night was the last time everyone in my year was together ☹☹ and then i just never saw anyone again #i hated school but i miss it so much. most confusing nostalgia ever #i didn't want to be there and i was so happy when i finished and i wouldn't go back if i could #but it hurts bc i missed out on so many experiences and just being around people.. i miss it #starting college (uk college not university) in september so maybe i'll be able to heal a bit #bc getting sick and dropping out of school ☹ being stuck in toxic friend groups and never having proper teenage experiences ☹ #kinda fucked me up i'm ngl ☹ #(no surprises by radiohead playing) no it's fine. it's fine #the way you spend so long in one place... with the same people... and then it's just gone. fuck 🤦‍♀️ #even if you didn't like the place or the people... it aches in such a weird way omg.. #i literally couldn't drive past my school for a bit bc. i used to get up at 7am & go there every day. and now i don't. does this make sense #ok to rb

[computer-boy]

a few more days until i can bundle up in bed for two days and not do anything (finally)

#studying? who is she #i will pass my exams with sheer willpower #<- going to fail #i dont even care if i fail at this point. studying will just make me feel worse #if i fail i fail and its going to be my fault so its ok #i really need to sleep... homework not done tho so i guess im staying up late #i. need to get up and do it or get caffeine or something so i can #actually fuck it i have a period before its due and we never do anything in maths anyways #if i get in trouble i get in trouble theres only like. how long until holidays #its my friends bday tmr anyways i cant be tired-looking lol #i'll study when i feel better (never) #there is something seriously wrong with me #i need therapy lol #right. im really fucking tired rn #im gonna go to bed #sorry for ramble lol im just fucked up like that #turns out undiagnosed adhd can actually lead to a lot more problems than just adhd i think #vent #<-kinda?

[elnotwoods]

wouldn’t it be absolutely fucking hilarious if i had to repeat the semester again AGAIN because straight up got too anxious on my exam? ha ha ha ha haaaa-

#fuck my brain #what’s being the best in class for when you totally freeze up during exams and even tho you’ve basically lived in the library #before the exam and yet the anxiety just shuts off my brain and it’s like going blind #verbs? never heard of them… honorifics? suddenly don’t know how they work #Chinese characters? keep dreaming about them and the correct way to write but on the test? idk how to even write my own name #el rants #might have to restart my studies #i am so tired of being mentally ill #i am tired of having crippling anxiety that just hinders me in everything I do #anxiety

[newtness532]

i need someone to come and force me to study and not leave until i am done studying

#when i was home and my sister was still in uni we would study together #last summer she was here during most of the exam season so even tho she wasn't studying i still had someone to keep me company #my brain has deleted almost all memories of me studying for the winter exams last year tbh but i do remember a lot of crying lol #so i need someone to be here when im studying #and id go to the uni library but its open like 9-15. #and with how messed up my sleeping schedule is that doesn't seem feasible #also i dont know if they are open on weekends. maybe i should try it on monday #bc i am really behind fuck #jo says stuff #university update

[scarletcomet]

love how i’m probably going to have to spend my entire fall break applying for internships. that is, if i make it through this week.

#have huge assignment due tomorrow (literally a whole ass news site in a class we have not been taught anything and they grade so harshly) #like functional can make an account and login and post articles and comment and shit from scratch using html css php and sql #none of which i had ever used before this class (they don't teach us) #i also have an exam tomorrow i haven't even thought about studying for yet (im gonna need to pull an all nighter fml im so exhausted already #also an exam wednesday (yom kippur) in a class where i am like over 3 weeks behind #a big programming assignment in the class i have an exam in tomorrow that's due friday that i cannot think about until after my exam thurs #not to mention my usual hw assignments in many classes #i did a really shitty job on my hw due this week/weekend #didn't try very hard on my hw due fri because i was so busy and then wanted to go to parties oops (that's not like me huh) #straight up didn't even submit my astrophysics hw due yesterday because i was just so exhausted so i was like fuck it #we get 2 drops i think #i need to do laundry but i don't have time. i have no clean clothes but i haven't had enough time at my apartment to do it #my apartment is such a mess #i need to clean before i leave for fall break on friday but idk if ill have time #i am so overwhelmed #there's absolutely no way ill be able to get even a fraction of all the stuff i need to get done this week done #my anxiety lowkey has not been super bad this weekend in the first time in so long #but at the same time idk if that's a good thing because im not as motivated to do work even tho i don't want to sh as much which is good