#god this is probably obnoxiously long because i can't do cuts on my phone

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 2

Episode 11: Indestructible Henry, Part 2

~Henry's bedroom~

Oh god, oh god, oh god. It was safe to say that for Henry, shit had hit the fan. he had just breathed fire. Actual, real flames had just erupted from his mouth and he knew that it was a mutation caused by the densitiser. 

"Charlotte, Charlotte, Charlotte."  He mumbled to himself as he frantically ran to his phone and called his smartest friend. She'd know what to do, right? Sure, she'd give him a massive "I told you so" speech, but as long as he sorted this mess out, he didn't care.

"What's up?" Her face appeared on the video chat as she answered the call in the middle of brushing her teeth.

"Okay, remember how yesterday when you, (y/n) and Schwoz asked me if I had any side effects and I said no, I didn't have any side effects?" Henry prompted, making her frown in suspicion. 

"Yeah..." She said slowly, getting the hint that something was off.

"I think I have a side effect." He gulped, making the girl roll her eyes.

"Ugh, I  knew it! So, what side effects do you have? Did you grow eyeballs on your butt?" Charlotte. asked him, making the boy check to see if anything had popped up in the middle of the night Charlotte knew something like this would happen, she only hoped (y/n) was okay.

"No, no!" Henry confirmed after a thorough check. No butt eyes for him.

"Then what side effect do you have?" Charlotte asked, impatient to know what was wrong with him.

"When I laugh, fire comes out of my--" He was cut off as a loud, obnoxious voice called from the opposite side of the door, Piper.

"Henry!" His little sister yelled from the hallway, making Henry panic as he worried about breathing fire in front of her.

"Aghhh, Piper's at my door." He told his friend in a concerned tone.

"Okay, tell me what side effect you have." Charlotte insisted. The suspense was killing her.

"I can't talk now, just come over," Henry told her and quickly ended the call and relaxed into a normal stance.

"Okay, Piper, just come on---" He was cut off as the small girl kicked the door open and stored into the room.

"Where are my headphones?" She demanded to know, even though her. brother had no clue. He didn't care about where she left her stuff, that was her responsibility.

"Did you just kick open my door?" Henry asked her in disbelief, as he blinked in amazement at how strong she was.

"Mom said you had them yesterday. Where are they?" She snapped, not caring about his door. 

"It wasn't even locked." He said as she started rummaging through his closet and yanking his clothes onto the floor.

"Will you get out of my closet?" He asked her tiredly as he let the "door thing" go. He didn't want to deal with his sister at that moment, he couldn't risk melting her face off.

"What is this thing?" She asked as she brought a large action-figure man out of the closet.

"Oh, uh, a vomiting Vinny-doll." He told her, just before the doll puked all over her face. 

"Ahhhhh!" She yelled in disgusts at the green slime that covered her eyes as Henry struggled to keep his face straight. He couldn't help but laugh, and the flames came out of his mouth as they had done before. Ah, geez.

"Uh, did you just seen that?" He asked his sister nervously as he covered his mouth.

"I can't see anything. Your doll just puked in my eyes!" Piper hissed, making Henry thank his lucky stars. That was close call. Piper could snitch to his mom all she wanted, he was just glad that he didn't have to explain that he was now a freak of nature.

~10 minutes later~

Henry ran down the stairs as his dad shouted to him that Charlotte had arrived. Thank God for that. He didn't care that on his mad dash down the stairs, he had bumped into his dad and spilt a load of marbles. He didn't care that he'd probably get into trouble because it, he just wanted to explain everything to Charlotte and work out what to do.

"So, I was listening to the radio, and No-Joe says "First joke of the morning: what did Jay-Z call his wife before they got married?"  And then Dangle's like--" Henry started to tell Charlotte on the porch, but she just wanted to get to the nitty-gritty straight away.

"Just tell me what side effect you have!" She snapped, making him take off his sneaker and sock. It was the only thing he could think of that would ensure he would laugh.

"Tickle my foot." He instructed the girl, who looked at him weirdly.

"Uhhhh, I don't do that." She said in discomfort, thinking that it would be weird to do that to her best friend.

"Tickle. My. Foot." Henry insisted, knowing it was essential to demonstrate what they were dealing with.

"Hahahaahaha--argh!" Charlotte knelt to tickle the sole of his foot and screamed in terror as his laughter turned into fire. 

"Shhhhh! Shhhhh! Don't scream or my parents will come out." Henry quietened her screams. His family might be able to hear them and that would open another can of worms.

"But fire just shot outta your mouth!" Charlotte exclaimed, her heart still pounding from the adrenaline rush.

"I know. It happens when I laugh and don't say I told you so." Henry warned her, but she didn't care.

"I told you so! I told you so! I told you so!" Charlotte chanted at him. She knew that something would go wrong and now they were in deep trouble. Trouble that was about to get deeper as Henry watch began to flash. Oh god, it was Ray. 

"Ah, ah, it's Ray, it's Ray!" Henry panicked.  If Ray made him laugh, he'd reveal that he'd gone against everything he'd said to them and involved (y/n) whilst they did it.

"Well, answer it," Charlotte told him, knowing it would be more suspicious to not answer.

"Okay, hide." The boy told her, wanting everything to seem normal when he spoke to his boss.

"Why do I have to hide?" She frowned.

"I'm panicking, just hide!" Henry ranted and shoved her into the bushes outside his front door. Charlotte wasn't very happy about it, but it made him feel a lot better. Flicking open his whiz watch, Ray's little hologram appeared over his wrist, smiling in blissful ignorance.

"Henry! You gotta hurry and get to Junk-N-Stuff. I got something really cool to show ya!" Ray told him excitedly, his latest purchase standing just behind him.

"Okay, I'll get there as soon as I can," Henry told him calmly, acting like his life was going normally and he hadn't been breathing fire all morning.

"Right. Oh and Henry?" Ray asked, having spotted something or rather someone behind the plant pots.

"Yeah?" The kid looked at him expectantly.

"Why's Charlotte hiding in that bush?" Ray questioned, clearly seeing the top of the girl's head poking out from behind the foliage.

"Hey, you tell me." She sassed, taking a dig at Henry who made her hide there in the first place.

"Oh, Ray, by the way..." Henry piped up quickly as Charlotte shuffled out from the bushes.

"What?" The superhero asked.

"How's (y/n) this morning? Nothing going on with her?" Charlotte joined in innocently. She and Henry wanted to make sure the young woman was all right and the one person who would know that for sure was Ray.

"She's fine, why?" The large man frowned at their questions. (y/n) had seemed fine last night, she had listened patiently as he told her all about his musical and giggled cutely at any jokes he made. Should he be worried?

"No reason, see you at work!" Henry quickly shut his watch and the two teens got moving before Ray could call back. They didn't dare explain to him that his sweet girl was possibly a mutant freak now.

~Junk-N-Stuff~

"I can't believe you bought that thing." (y/n) chuckled at Ray, as he rubbed his new cannon lovingly. Yeah, that's right, a cannon. He couldn't help but buy it, he thought it was cool and (y/n) would never object to seeing him smile so brightly.

"Why?"  He asked, giving her a charming grin. Her stomach was bubbling with nerves about telling him the good news and seeing him look at her like that didn't help.

"'Cause, it's so big!" She pointed out. It was huge and took up most of the free floor space in the shop. Ray didn't say anything in reply for a few minutes, wondering if he should bring up the fact that Henry and Charlotte were worried about her.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked softly, keeping his eyes on the cannon so it would seem like a casual question. He didn't want to let on that his heart was hurting at the notion that she was sick or upset. Her pain always felt like his pain.

"Yeah, I'm in excellent health." She said quickly. To anyone else, it might have seemed disingenuous, but he was too relieved to hear she was okay.  He didn't pick up that her answer was rushed. She didn't want to give the game away before the kids got there and she didn't want him worrying. Sure, the way he excitedly retold all his stories from the musical made her heart bleed, but she'd been waiting for five years now, she could be patient. And Jolene couldn't do what she could do now, one point for her.

"Hey, Ray. Hi, (y/n)." Henry and Charlotte greeted them as they walked in the store, looking in confusion as Ray proudly gestured to his cannon. At least (y/n) was being normal, they just wanted to know if she breathed fire or had butt eyes or something.

"Hey, Ray, hi (y/n), that's all you guys are gonna say? You don't see this gigantic cannon?" He whined, hoping that they'd be as impressed with the rickety old thing as he was.

"Hey, cannon."

"Hi, cannon." The teens greeted the cannon as they had done to the adults and panicked internally a little as (y/n) giggled. Funny wasn't good.

"Come on, look at this baby!" Ray exclaimed, running his hand along the top of his "baby".

"He's in love with it." (y/n) kept giggling, making the kids fret and worry that she'd melt their faces off. They quickly mumbled some nice things about the cannon to satisfy Ray's need for attention. Yeah, he loved the old-fashioned weapon, but it was safe to say he loved (y/n) more.

"This is just like the cannon that fired the first shot at the Battle of Swellview. Just imagine this cannon going boom!" Ray imagined how epic it would've been to see this thing in action and his friends rolled their eyes at his over-enthusiastic shouting.

"Yeah, the enemy was probably all like, ahhhhh!" (y/n) bantered in a flat tone, giving him a light punch on the arm. 

"I know right, and I bet the people watching were just like, whoaaaaa!" Ray just carried on with what she said, making his best friend giggle at how siked he was. She also couldn't help but stare at how his t-shirt had shrunk over several hot washes and was now stretching over his chest and arms immaculately. God, he looked so hot, she just wanted to jump on him.

"Where'd you get this thing?" Charlotte asked as she walked around the cannon to study all its features.

"At the weapons store that went out business," Ray explained as (y/n) stood next to Henry. 

"Always Loaded?" The girl thought she had heard of the store before.

"That's the one." (y/n) confirmed as she poked Henry to remind him that they needed to tell Ray their big secret.

"Hey, Ray, (y/n) and I gotta talk to you." The boy started nervously, the young woman next to him squeezing his shoulder to give him some confidence. They were in this together, after all.

"Yeah, they really gotta talk to you," Charlotte stressed, trying to convey that this was serious.

"All right, just flip that closed sign over, will you?" Ray said, not wanting anyone to come in whilst they were talking. If (y/n) and Henry needed to speak with him then he'd listen. 

"Yeah, sure," Henry said and stepped up to the door to flip the sign and (y/n) turned and watched him. She wouldn't start without Henry's support, she didn't know how Ray would react.

"Hey, what's this chain for?" Charlotte asked as she ran her fingers across the metal chain. They really shouldn't mess with it.

"I don't know. Let me see." Ray said, curiously pulling the chain and predictably, causing the cannon to fire a cannonball straight at Henry. They jumped at the booming noise as the large, heavy cast-iron ball flew towards the boy and because of its age, the cannon also fired a piece of shrapnel at (y/n). Oh, god. 

Omar squeaked as Ray caught Charlotte in his arms, the two of them paling when they saw Henry slumped against the door covered in soot and with the cannon on his lap. (y/n) was groaning next to him as a piece of sharp metal stuck into her shoulder and sweet cheese, did it hurt.

"Henry?! (y/n)?!" Ray gasped in terror as he saw his beloved sidekick and darling friend lying on the floor, appearing to be half dead.

"Kid! Sweet girl!" He leapt over the cannon and ran to their sides, his hands trembling as he reached out to remove the cannonball and cup her face. How could he be so stupid? He'd killed an innocent boy and his best friend before he could tell her how he felt...

"Stupid cannonball! You killed my friends!" He screamed and threw the ball at a lamp next to Charlotte. He felt numb like he was dying on the inside as he thought about the future he'd never have with her. No wedding, no honeymoon in Hawaii, no son and daughter, no Sunday breakfast with the family he'd always dreamt of. Just him and the memory of one foolish mistake that took away everything. 

He fell to his knees and began to sob quietly as he mourned Henry and his sweet girl, clutching at the fabric of her blood-stained dress. He should've told her everything, should've memorised the taste of her kiss, the feel of her lips, and treated her like the queen she was. Now, his days would be dark and loveless as he lost two of his greatest friends.

"Why are you crying?" A hoarse, pained voice asked him softly as she and Henry snapped out of their shock. Ray looked up with bloodshot eyes as Henry coughed and spluttered and she gently touched her shoulder, gulping when she touched the shrapnel still sticking out. That would be a right bitch to pull out.

"Wow," Henry mumbled, feeling great despite being hit by a cannonball as Ray looked at them both with a dumbstruck face.

"How can you be talking?" He asked them in a shaky voice, believing that he had fallen into some kind of fever dream. This wasn't real, it was his grief, it had to be. Well, that's what he thought until his fingertips grazed (y/n)'s cheek and she giggled in response. She wasn't dead? That metal should've killed her, it went through her heart. And how had Henry survived all his blunt force trauma?

"And living?" Ray stepped back from his friends as they stood up slowly. (y/n) winced as the shrapnel wiggled in her wound and she knew she'd have to yank it out soon. She'd be fine though, she was a proper superhero now.

"'Cause...we're fine," Henry reassured him as he panicked. (y/n) put her hands on his upper arms, but the sight of her blood staining her clothing made him feel ill. This was a nightmare, it had to be. He'd wake up and all of this would be some crazy dream and his sweet girl would be in her bed, tucked up safely in her sleep.

"You can't be fine! You just took a cannonball to the gut at point-blank range! And you--you've got that in your chest!" Ray stuttered as he gestured to their injuries but they felt more or less okay. They just needed to show him that they were fine.

"Yeah." Henry nodded as (y/n) looked down at the oozing wound. Well, she might as well get it over with...

"Right, one, two..." She grasped the metal in her fist and squeezed her eyes shut as she gave herself a countdown to brace for the pain.

"Whoa, whoa, don't! I gotta take you to the hospi--" Ray tried to stop her, thinking she was about to make her situation one hundred times worse by removing the embedded debris. She had taken numerous first aid courses, didn't she know not to take stabbing stuff out?

"...Three!" She ignored him and yanked the metal from her shoulder. Sucking in a sharp breath as the sting intensified, she bit her bottom lip as the wound healed over instantly, her skin becoming smooth and porcelain again, if not a little sticky from her blood. She could deal with that, the important thing was her superpower had saved her and Ray was looking at her like she had grown a second head.

He stepped forward and brushed his fingers against the hole in her dress, marvelling at how the blood flow had ceased and the injury had vanished. What the hell was happening?

"Henry, sweet girl, did you....?" He looked from the kid to the young woman in shock and apprehension before picking up an electric drill that (y/n) had left lying around after she had fixed some wiring in the store.

"Now hang on a minute..." (y/n)'s eyes widened as he squeezed the trigger and looked at them both with intent. Just because she could heal super fast now didn't mean she wanted to get hurt. A drill to the arm would still hurt.

Charlotte frowned at her boss's odd method as he jabbed the drill into Henry's stomach and blanched when it did nothing.

"Ow." He deadpanned as the man lifted his hoodie and saw that there was no cut or bruise, just normal, unblemished skin. He even punched the boy on the face with the butt of the drill and gazed in amazement when he got back up with no bump or scratches. He then turned to (y/n) who gave him a nervous smile, before offering her upper arm for him to test it out on.

"Just do it." She said with an eye roll, rolling up her sleeve so her dress wouldn't be damaged even more. Ray tapped the whirling drill bit against her arm, cringing when her skin darkened into a purple bruise. She whimpered at the burning friction but smiled at his shocked face when her healing factor kicked in. She felt so damn cool.

"You're...you're indestructible." He breathed out, gently putting his hand over the place where her bruise used to be. She couldn't be hurt, this was incredible. He'd just found another reason to fall in love with her...

"Well, technically, he's the indestructible one, I just have super regeneration now. Y'know, like Wolverine." She grinned at him happily, stoked that she was like a proper superhero now. She just hoped he wouldn't be mad.

"Surprise!" The kids cheered awkwardly as Ray looked around at his friends with wide eyes

"We did it yesterday," Henry told him with a small smile. Like (y/n), he was praying Ray would take the news, otherwise, he could kiss his job goodbye.

"It worked? That's amazing!" He laughed, bringing his girl into a tight hug which she readily accepted. She was overjoyed that he was happy and it felt so good to have those strong arms around her waist again. His only worry was that now she was invulnerable, she wouldn't need him as her protector. If she couldn't get hurt, where did that leave him? 

On the sidelines, as she looked for another guy without the fear of injury from a mad criminal or villain. 

"I know! To be honest, mine was a mistake, I just tried to help Henry and got zapped by accident." She giggled and buried her nose into the crook of his neck. She could never leave him for someone else, she had found her soulmate already and was wrapped up in his embrace.

"Any side effects?" He asked her and Henry, making the boy scratch his neck nervously.

"No, I feel great...why are you looking like that?" (y/n) asked worriedly when she saw how pale Henry had gone. She had been perfectly all right all night, had something gone wrong for him?

~In the Man Cave~

Ray and Charlotte were sat on the couch and nibbling on some pizza slices as Schwoz scanned Henry and (y/n). They had been strapped and locked into two chairs since they didn't know if they had any other side effects and Schwoz wanted to keep everyone safe. Ray was beyond worried for both of them, he'd never live with himself if his friends had to live as weirdos with mutations for the rest of their lives due to his dad's invention. 

"Okay, I'm ready to test them," Schwoz told the waiting girl and man as he finished loading up Henry's body scan next to (y/n)'s on a monitor. 

"Finally." Ray stood up immediately and abandoned his pizza in favour of rushing over to his best friend's side. She gave him a reassuring smile as he squeezed her trapped hand and put an arm around her shoulders. Seeing her as part of an experiment made his protective side jump out to be her mother hen.

"So is Henry fully indestructible?" Charlotte asked as she stood next to her best friend. She was worried about him, breathing fire was a major problem.

"Oh, yeah, he is," Schwoz confirmed, after checking the scan results. Henry was dense now.

"Otherwise your cannon would have killed me." Henry sassed Ray, raising his eyebrows as he watched Ray stroking and pining over the young woman in the opposite chair.

"I know right, the densitiser really saved our asses." (y/n) giggled, not processing how Ray was petting her hair and stressing over her. It was just natural to her at this point and she was too in love with him to protest.

"And what about (y/n)?" He asked Schwoz anxiously, hoping his girl was okay.

"She has a particularly sensitive regenerative healing factor caused by minimal exposure to the densitising rays. She can heal any injury even if they are severe like a being shot with a blaster or brain damage." Schwoz explained, making (y/n) gasp in amazement and look up at Ray with wonder in her eyes. Okay, Miss Danger just got a major upgrade. The bad guys wouldn't know what hit them.

"So, what about Henry laughing fire? Can (y/n) do it too?" Charlotte piped up as she took a bit of her pizza.

"That's what we're gonna test right now. Now, guys, you sit still and watch me and Ray." Schwoz instructed them. It was easy enough, especially since (y/n) could rarely stop herself from staring and drooling at her best friend.

"What are we doing?" Ray asked as he reluctantly removed himself from the woman's side and followed Schwoz over to the table.

"Now, we begin the test with my homemade schwozamole," Schwoz said, holding up a bowl of his delicious avocado dip that always made Ray envy him. 

"Aw, darn it. My schwozamole smells funky." Schwoz said sneakily, not letting on to Ray that he had an ulterior motive. Henry, Charlotte and (y/n) watched in curiosity as Ray frowned in confusion.

"Really? Let me smell it--" He bent down to sniff the guacamole and squealed in surprise as Schwoz shoved his face down into the green, mushy goop. 

"Schwoz!" He yelled in anger as he came back up with his face covered in the dip and boy, was it hilarious. Charlotte, (y/n) and Henry laughed at the funny scene as he scowled at the genius.

"Hahahahaha---ahhhhhh!" (y/n) stopped laughing and recoiled in horror when Henry's mouth became a flamethrower, the heat reaching metres in front of him. The three not cuffed in chairs hit the deck as they avoid the fire, staring at the boy in shock as he quickly shut his mouth. Schwoz dashed over to the scanner results as (y/n) winced at her slightly burnt cheek, her proximity to the fire meaning that she had crisped up a bit on her left cheek.

"Well, now I know what it feels like to be toasted." She quipped with a chuckle as her skin returned to normal. She could get used to this healing thing, it was more than useful.

"Okay, when the machine made Henry indestructible, it also mutated his throat muscles and that's why fire now shoots from his mouth when he laughs," Schwoz explained as the scanner beeped with its analysis.

"Well,...awesome!" Ray exclaimed, thinking that being able to breathe fire was awesome.

"What?" Charlotte looked at him like he was crazy, as did Henry and his best friend.

"Dude!

"Raymond!" They scolded him in stern voices.

"How is this awesome?" The teen girl questioned him, thinking he must have been hit on the head or something

"'Cause, now, wherever Henry and I fight bad guys, if one of them pulls a weapon, all Henry's gotta do is "hahahahaah, bshhhhh!" and the bad guys will be all like "ahhhh, my face is melting! Why did I commit this crime?" And I'll be like "exactly!"" Ray acted out his imagining dramatically, making everyone sigh in frustration. That was a terrible idea.

"Oh, yeah! But what if I'm out with a girl and I laugh and then she's all "oh, no! Why'd I go out with this guy?! He's shooting fire at my face!"" Henry yelled back angrily as Schwoz let him and (y/n) out of the confinement chairs. 

"He's right, girls do not like that," Charlotte said as the young woman rubbed her chaffed wrists. She still had a burning question though and she wanted an answer.

"Wait, what about me? I feel fine and I didn't breathe any fire." She said, gesturing to her side-effect-free body. She was interested in knowing why she had come out perfectly fine, but Henry had gained some freaky mutation in the process.

"To be honest, I don't know. Probably because you're a woman and you weren't exposed for as long." Schwoz theorised although he couldn't be certain. There could be a reasonable, scientific explanation or (y/n) could've just got very lucky, who knows.

"Right, so what are we gonna do about Henry?" She put forward, wanting to focus on the kid since he was the one with a problem. And she wasn't even meant to get a superpower, yet she had come out of it unscathed and Henry, the real test subject, was left with grave consequences.

"Well, maybe I can make some technical adjustments to the densitiser machine, but--" Schwoz thought out loud as everyone took a minute to think.

"Oooh, so Henry could stay indestructible, but not laugh with fire?" Charlotte added in as he theorised. It wasn't a good idea to interrupt Schwoz's train of thought.

"Okay, who is Schwoz? You?" He asked in a fake sweet voice.

"No," Charlotte stated with a gulp.

"Then maybe you should let me say the Schwoz things, how about that?" He said rhetorically and rudely.

"Temper, temper." (y/n) mocked him with an annoyed face. Just because Charlotte got to a conclusion quicker than he did, didn't mean that Schwoz could be a dick to her.

"Okay, let's just go check out the densitiser and maybe Schwoz can figure out a way to---" Ray was cut off as Henry's phone began to ring in his pocket. There was always something interrupting them.

"Oh, hang on." He said and stepped to the side to answer the phone. Taking advantage of the actionless situation, (y/n) grabbed a tissue from a box on the table and began to wipe the schwozamole from Ray's face. She smiled gently as she cleaned off the green mush, his hands resting on her hips as he studied the way her tongue poked out when she concentrated. So cute.

"Oh, dinner," Henry said to his father over the phone, prompting the adults to snap their focus to him.

"No, no, no, no, no, bad idea!" (y/n) hissed to him as she stopped mid-clean and shook her head at Henry with Ray and Schwoz.

"You can't go have dinner with your family!" Charlotte told him in a hushed tone. There were so many things that could go wrong in that situation, it was too risky.

"What if you laugh?" Schwoz reminded him with a serious voice.

"Oh, dad, I'm kinda stuck at work so I don't think I'm gonna be able to--" Well, from the sounds of angry man on the other end of the line, it was safe to say that Henry's father wasn't going to let him miss that dinner. 

"What? I never said that about mom!" He snapped at his dad as he made threats against him. 

"Okay, I'm on my way!" He conceded with a sigh. Henry didn't want to upset his mom, so it looked like he was going to dinner. Hopefully, he didn't melt off his family's face.

"Okay, I gotta go home, but as soon as I'm done with dinner, we can..." Henry trailed off as he watched Charlotte and (y/n) scoop the remainder of the guacamole on Ray's face onto a chip. Waste not, want not; they were hungry and Ray couldn't resist (y/n)'s puppy eyes and pouting.

"We like the schwozamole." The young woman gave him a cheesy grin, even though Ray didn't look impressed. But, then again, he'd do anything to make his girl happy, even if it meant letting her eat Schwoz's dumb guac off his face.

"Don't judge us!" Charlotte told them as they went in with a second chip. Henry could only hope his evening with his family would go smoothly, but knowing his luck, it would go terribly.

~20 minutes later~

With Henry struggling to keep a straight face at Piper's dinner party, Schwoz, Charlotte, Ray and (y/n) were busily testing the densitiser with some new adjustments. They were trying to get it to a stage where they could at least reverse the mutative effects on Henry's throat and all that they could do now was test it.

"Okay, goggles on," Schwoz instructed his friends and they all lowered their eyewear so the energy wouldn't hurt them, not that Ray or now (y/n) could be hurt.

"Come on, are gonna start this test or what?" Ray asked him impatiently, having had enough with all the waiting. He just wanted to get to the action.

"Yah, here we go." The genius said in his thick accent and counted down the timer as he and Charlotte pressed some buttons and raised the power lever. They all stood back as the densitiser fizzed and illuminated with the densitising rays, but to their shock, the machine began to overload and spark as it sucked in more and more electricity.

"Schwoz, turn that damn thing off!" (y/n) shouted above all the noise, fearing that they'd have another disaster on their hands if they didn't act quickly. Following her order, the small man scuttled over to the power lever and turned everything off as Ray hugged his best friend protectively to his chest. He knew she didn't need him to protect her anymore, but he wanted to be the one to care for her so bad, he just couldn't help it.

"So, how'd it go?" Ray asked sarcastically once the light show had ended and they were all stood looking at the fried equipment. Schwoz frowned at him as (y/n) slipped her hand into his and unwillingly removed herself from his chiselled chest.

"What went wrong?" Charlotte quizzed, having believed that Schwoz had everything figured out and under control.

"He put too much power through this thing." (y/n) stated as her eyes raked over the smoking, burnt-out components. This would be a mammoth task to repair.

"Well, I need some kind of conductor to connect the particle densitiser to the molecular transducer," Schwoz explained as Ray sighed. That would never happen.

"Dude, there's nothing in Swellview that will conduct that much power without melting down or burning out." The large man argued, making (y/n) squeeze his hand to make him calm down. Shouting and bickering would help nothing.

"Well, don't you think I know that?!" Schwoz hissed back so the young woman got in between them and as always acted as the referee.

"Okay, boys, let's take a deep breath." She told them in a soothing voice whilst Charlotte came up with her theory.

"Wait, hang on. Don't human beings connect electricity with our bodies?" She asked, feeling pretty sure that she'd learnt something like that in her science class.

"Sure," Schwoz said, as (y/n) nodded along. 

"Yeah, we have loads of elements in our bodies like sodium, potassium, calcium, and magnesium that can carry an electric charge because of the negative and positive ions." She. explained, feeling real brainy that she was able to recall the science like some kind of genius.

"But if we tried to use a human being to connect particle densitiser to the molecular transducer, the person would be fried like Mexican fish stick." Ray pointed out pessimistically, not seeing what Charlotte was getting at. 

"Not if that person were indestructible." The teen smirked and poked him on the arm as she and Schwoz grinned at each other with knowing looks. 

"Heh, you're gonna be a fish stick." (y/n) giggled in a silly voice, resting her head on his bicep as Ray frowned at the news.

"Wait, wait, wait. I can't reach across there, my arms aren't long enough." He suddenly realised, comparing the sizeable gap to his arm span. He was right, he'd never be able to grab both conducting roads on his own.

"Right, but what if a second person could heal herself as quickly as she got fried?" Charlotte prompted, this time smirking at (y/n) who's smile immediately dropped.

"Oh, shit." She breathed out as she grasped that she was the second guinea pig. It was true, she'd get fried and then heal, get fried, and then heal, and so forth, but that didn't mean it wouldn't hurt like a bitch. 

It was time to call Henry and it looked like they were both gonna be Mexican fish sticks by the end of this.

~

"Hey, Hen, you need to listen--" (y/n) was cut off as Henry answered her and Ray's holocall.

"Okay, don't say anything funny or I'll end up roasting my wrist." He told the adults sternly, making them raise their eyebrows at each other. Had he not been paying attention to what had happened in the last two days?

"Relax, you're indestructible now." Ray reminded him as he leaned in close to his best friend so their elbows were touching. He could see where Henry was coming from though, it had been difficult for him to adjust to his indestructibility too.

"It would still hurt," Henry whined, but they were getting away from the purpose of their call: telling him their plan.

"Anyway, we're 99% certain we have a way of curing your freaky fire-breathing thing." (y/n) introduced the topic, piquing Henry's interest.

"Wait, what do you mean?" He asked, wanting something more to go on than just that.

"Yeah, we think we rerigged the densitiser so it'll fix your fire problem." Ray elaborated further, although he didn't give that much more information.

"You do?" Henry asked hopefully, feeling more than ready to get back to normal.

"Yeah, so you need to haul ass and get the Man Cave asap." (y/n) instructed him, knowing that the sooner they sorted this stuff out, the sooner shit would calm down.

"Okay, but first, I gotta find a way out of this dumb family dinner. One sec." The boy excused himself and closed his watch. Peeking back inside the house, he saw that Piper had discovered that her family hated her abysmal cooking and she announced that the dinner was over. Well, that was easy.

Stepping back outside, he reopened the watch and the holograms of (y/n) and Ray were still patiently stood waiting for him to get back to them.

"I found a way." He said simply and ended the call so he could get moving. Normality here he came.

~The basement~

"So, you sure this thing's gonna fix my fire-breathing problem?" The boy asked Schwoz as he looked around at the new equipment that had been set up. He wasn't the only one who was nervous; Ray had been asking (y/n) repeatedly if she was sure she wanted to volunteer her body as a conductor and each time she had given a firm yes. She wanted to help Henry and even though it was risky, she was willing to do it to give him a normal life. 

"Uh, pretty sure," Schwoz replied in a quiet nervous voice. He couldn't be 100% certain since they hadn't fully tested it out. He hoped it would, Henry couldn't keep breathing fire all the time and he knew that Ray would kill him if the experiment harmed (y/n). He didn't care about himself, he just wanted her to be all right.

"But I won't be indestructible anymore?" Henry asked in a sad voice. If he lost his superpower, then this whole experience would have been pointless.

"We don't know." (y/n) said solemnly, understanding that he didn't want to become "useless" again. It didn't seem fair to her, she had gained a superpower that she would rarely use and he had to give his up even though he sorely needed it. Life was such a cow sometimes.

"Well then, before I do this, Ray?" The boy looked to his boss with a kind face.

"Yeah, kid?" He asked in a soft voice.

"One time. Just in case it's my last time." Henry said, tapping his cheek lightly. Ray looked at (y/n) and Charlotte in confusion, but they just shrugged and encouraged him to go for it.

"Sure, kid." He complied and thinking that it was what he wanted, gave Henry a light kiss on the cheek. It made (y/n)'s heart melt to see him so cute and friendly with his sidekick, so she admired how strong their friendship was. But, it didn't last long, Henry recoiled as soon as the kiss touched his skin as he hadn't meant to ask for one.

"Ew! No, no, no, what are you doing, man?!" He cringed and wiped his face as his friends looked at him in puzzlement. 

"What?" Ray asked him innocently. He gave him what he wanted, why did he sound so disgusted?

"You know, when people tap their cheek, they want someone to give them a kiss." (y/n) explained, seeing that Henry didn't understand that piece of social etiquette.

"Yeah, for example..." Ray tapped his cheek to (y/n), and she demonstrated the act by pecking him chastely above his jawline since she couldn't reach all the way, even on her tiptoes. It was his devious way of getting a free kiss out of her, but he played it off like it was just a friendly gesture. He only hoped that she wouldn't pick up on his blush, thundering heart or dilated pupils.

"I didn't want you to kiss it, I wanted you to punch it." Henry clarified as he, Schwoz and Charlotte smirked at how Ray indulged himself by getting (y/n) to kiss him. He was so whipped, always looking for an opportunity to sneak in some affection from her. He thrived off of it - if only he knew that he just needed to ask and she'd give him everything he wanted.

"While I'm still indestructible." The teen boy dumbed it down when everyone looked at him in bewilderment and they all finally understood what he meant. Why didn't he just say that?

Ray gave him a strong punch to the face, making the boy fall around the place as his head spun dizzily. He got what he wanted and the force of it even made Ray's seasoned knuckles ache for few seconds. 

"I'm okay!" Henry said proudly for the last time as he recovered from the blow. God, he'd miss doing that.

"Classic." Ray chuckled as his sidekick used his catchphrase. He loved that kid, he always made him laugh.

"All right, let's do this," Charlotte announced to everyone as (y/n) and Ray took up their positions next to the power cells. He was more nervous for her than anyone else. He'd been through all kinds of pain, but she'd never done anything like this before and he was worried she wouldn't cope.

"Goggles on," Schwoz instructed and everyone pulled the dark eyewear down. (y/n) interlaced her fingers with Ray and took a deep breath as she mentally prepared herself. 'You've got this. You're a boss bitch.' She affirmed in her head, hoping that she'd psyche herself into calmness.

"Wait, do I get goggles?" Henry asked as he watched his friends protect themselves, but he couldn't. He didn't want to go blind either.

"Uh, we only have four pairs," Schwoz told him slowly, not knowing what else to do, so (y/n) decided that she'd give him hers.

"Here, kid, take mine." She told him, pulling the goggles from her eyes and leaning over so he could take them.

"Whoa, whoa whoa, no. Henry can't have your goggles." Ray protested, hating the idea that she was plunging herself into more and more danger.

"Uh, yes, he can. He's a boy and if my eyes get hurt, my regeneration will heal them." She told him firmly, not wanting to argue with him on this. He looked at her with an open mouth, not knowing whether to have faith in her or wrap her up in cotton wool like he normally did.

"Ray, trust me. I'll be fine." She reassured him, making him nod wordlessly as she clasped his hand even tighter and Henry put on her goggles. It made her feel a bit better after the whole "she got a superpower, he got a mutation" situation and her heart was way too kind to just stand by and let the kid get hurt even more.

Seeing that everyone was ready, Schwoz started the countdown and the couple gave each one last loving glance before the electricity flowed through their veins. They groaned and moaned in agony as Ray felt like he was on fire and (y/n)'s body restored any scorched skin. Henry's screams of pain were in tandem with theirs as he too experienced a searing burning sensation and convulsed from the energy. 

"Stop!" Schwoz instructed Charlotte to lift her lever as (y/n) panted through the pain, praying to god that it was nearly over. The electricity supply was cut off as Schwoz pulled his lever too and Ray stumbled forward with the young woman in his arms.

"(y/n/n), you okay?" He asked worriedly when she took a minute to fully heal over, but his relief melted away when she looked up at him when a drunk grin.

"That felt awesome!" She laughed, jumping up so she could wrap her legs around his waist in a full-body hug.

"I know right! We're not fish sticks!" He laughed along with her and spun her around gently, tremendously relieved that she was still here for him to hold and love.

"Henry, are you alright?" Charlotte's voice brought them back down to reality, so Ray placed her on her feet again and they bashfully separated. Sometimes it was like no one else was in the room with them.

"I think so." He panted and flexed her muscles to check if he was injured or if he had mutated anymore. He felt fine, but they needed to test it.

"Okay, how do we make him laugh to see if fire comes out?" Ray looked at his best friend, Charlotte and Schwoz to see if they knew of anything that Henry found funny.

"Oh my god, do your impression of Schwoz taking a shower. It's hilarious." (y/n) suggested, her eyes glinting as she thought of how silly he was when he joked around.

"Good idea, that'll make Henry laugh." Ray agreed with her and so did the kids. He moved into a space so he could get the full effect, whilst Schwoz rolled his eyes. He was always the butt of the joke.

"I am Schwoz, I am Schwoz. Dirty, dirty Schwoz. Oh, hello, Mr Soap. You are going on a disgoosting adventure in my belly button, gahhhhh." Ray put on a funny, "Schwoz" accent and lifted his shirt to show how he thought Schwoz acted in the shower. The teens and (y/n) laughed at his spot-on impression, although the latter did blush slightly when she got a peek at his well-defined Adonis Belt. She'd be lying if she said she didn't want to see that sight more often...

Anyway, their laughter stopped gradually and they all looked at Henry expectantly, their smiles growing when no fire came out of his mouth.

"I worked! I laughed, no fire!" He exclaimed in delight, making his friends give him a high-five each. Success was sweet!

"Wait a minute! Hold your horses!" (y/n) quietened their excitement before they got ahead of themselves. This thing was finished yet.

"We still don't know if Henry's indestructible or not." Charlotte pointed out, but no one noticed how Schwoz had sloped off to grab an old vase. He raised it as high as he could and smashed it onto Henry's skull, the brutal impact causing the boy to pass out instantly.

"He's back to normal!" He said happily as Ray, (y/n) and Charlotte looked at him in horror.

"Char, go get my first aid kit." The young woman sighed, kneeling next to the boy as she flicked away a few shards of glass from under her knees.

"Right!" The girl did as she was told and left with Schwoz to go back upstairs. Of course, Schwoz didn't care now that his work was done. Typical.

"Ray, do you have anything that can be put on the wound for pressure?" She asked her best friend as she inspected the wound. It was terrible, but it certainly needed some careful treatment. 

"Uh, yeah, sure." Ray thought on his feet and removed his white t-shirt from his body and offered it to (y/n) who hadn't noticed what he'd done.

"Thanks..." She went to smile up at him before trailing off with a dry mouth as his chiselled pecs and abs stared at her. It took every fibre of her strength to not squeak or moan in desire. He had to be torturing her, but he didn't realise that this was her idea of hell. A look but don't touch policy, ugh.

"So, uh, can I ask you something?" He brought up as she breathed as normally as she could and applied pressure to Henry's head wound. The boy groaned in pain as she did so and she was anxious to get him some medicine to make him less aware of it.

"Yeah, sure. What's up?" She said softly, settling in for a relaxed conversation with him as she worked. However, she was so distracted that she didn't notice that for him, this was anything but relaxing and he was dying to ask her a burning question.

"Uh, well. Will you be leaving the Man Cave since you have a superpower now?" He gulped, expecting the worst. Why would she stick around him and all the mundane shit he made her do if she could go somewhere else and be her own hero? He hated the idea of her leaving, but he wouldn't have the heart to stop her from following her dreams if she wanted to go somewhere else.

However, to his surprise, she gazed at him in shock and chuckled at him without any humour. Did he want her to leave? Her dreams were here, she couldn't leave. She would always return to him, because here's where she wanted to be, nowhere else. Her nose twitched and she blinked her glassy eyes several times as her nerves went into overdrive. Maybe he didn't want some other super around to steal his thunder, maybe she was better off sticking to his type; powerless girls with perfect figures and flawless makeup.

"What? I don't want to leave." She told him in a quiet voice, glad that her hands were pressing on something as she was certain they would be trembling if not. 

"Are you sure? 'Cause I don't want--" She didn't let him finish as she jumped to the conclusion that he didn't want her there anymore. It made her hand fly to her heart as it physically ached. No super healing would be able to repair her broken heart if he forced her out and she couldn't bear to hear those words.

"If you want me to leave, just say it." She lamented, her voice tone quiet and tender as she braced herself for despair. Ray took a moment to take in her lowered gaze, shrinking body, and the way her fingers clenched his t-shirt. She thought that was what he wanted? She couldn't be more wrong.

"I don't want you to go." He reassured her, putting his hands over hers and helped her keep steady. She sniffed sadly as she unconsciously shifted towards him and took in a deep breath. If it was up to him, she'd never stray from his side, but he couldn't make that decision for her.

"I just wanted to tell you that if you...wanted to leave and become a superhero in your own right, I wouldn't stop you. I want you to be happy." He confessed, swallowing his shame or embarrassment. There was often a fine line between them for him and it always kept him from expressing himself honestly, even to her. But this time, it was the truth, pure and simple. Her happiness was his own and he'd be damned if he held her back.

"Do you really think this nervous wreck could be a full-time, fully independent superhero?" She told him with a breathy chuckle, using humour to relieve some of the tension. Ray's smile broke her anxiety and they relaxed again, feeling at ease once again.

"I don't know." Ray giggled as she rested her head on his shoulder. If Henry wasn't unconscious in front of them this would be such a sweet moment.

"I'm not going anywhere, doofus." She told him gently once his head came to rest on hers. Her, a superhero without Captain Man by her side? As if! She'd probably end up shooting herself rather than the bad guys, so it was safe to say she'd be sticking around the Man Cave for a long time.

"Okay. I'm not going anywhere either." He whispered happily, his heart fluttering from the knowledge that she'd be his for the foreseeable future and he pushed the thought that one day, she might up sticks for another guy to the back of his mind. He just focused on the moment; his sweet girl was with him - that was all that mattered.

They were so caught up in each other, neither of them saw how Henry had woken from his unconsciousness with a thumping headache, but through the pain, he still had a smile on his face. He was hurt, but happy. He'd be fine, (y/n) was fine, Ray was fine, and they were that much closer to spilling their love to each other. 

For now, everything was good.

#fanfiction #x reader #chapa de silva #cross posted on wattpad #captain man #danger force #dangerverse #henry hart #henry danger #mika macklin #ray manchester fanfiction #ray manchester #ray manchester x reader #female reader #reader insert #captain man x reader #cross posted on ao3 #reader fic #xreader #reader x character #fluff #angst #angst with a happy ending #light angst #friends to lovers #friends #best friends to lovers #soulmates #lovers #love

[emptymanuscript]

Really only making a note here because I don't keep a real physical journal and I try to make these notes as important so... I dunno... I have a record I guess. And I am purposefully trying not to dissociate the less acceptable parts of myself by sticking them other places as a bad coping mechanism. So... here. :/ Even though I would kind of rather not.

But it is. So it goes. Bleh.

I fucking backslid tonight.

After taking up pretty much all the space in my group therapy and getting a whole spiel about not self harming... I self harmed tonight. First time in ages.

The obnoxious thing about self harm once you've got the habit is that it honestly DOES feel better for a moment. It's like, "Oh, thank god." I assume it is the same as an addict's first hit in ages. Just that, yeah, that's why I used to do this, it really does feel good. For a moment anyway. And, at this point, it doesn't even itch anymore. It doesn't hurt that much for very long, so the downside is minimal, really. I just don't do enough damage to be really concerning.

Why worry then?

Probably because I had a bigger reaction to freaking out that I might have put a chip in my glasses (I didn't, phew) than I did to running a knife across my face. I just have terrible hand/eye coordination so I jabbed the wrong place while bringing the knife toward myself.

And after making sure that my glasses were fine, I went to stare at myself in the mirror and see if I could see any lines or anything. And my reaction to no was, "Well, that was disappointing."

So, Imperius, my voice in my head that hates me and wants me to be ill is on the louder end tonight. And the worst thing is, is that he has a point. He says, you'll feel better if you jab yourself with the knife, and I did. You'll be happier if you just kill yourself. And it is very hard to argue differently in the moment. It does always come down to, but who will feed the dogs? Who will let them out? That's going to freak them out.

In therapy tonight they referred to my feeling of hopelessness and depression as a well worn rut. And they are so right. It's stupid. I'm stupid. There's no point to all this melodrama. I don't have any problem that I can't fix. I've been making good progress.

And I hear my father's voice in my head. Every time you do a good thing, you get an 'ata boy.' One hundred 'ata boy's and you get a 'way to go.' But just one 'aw shit' wipes the slate clean. So... clean slate tonight. That's the ticky.

And I have therapy again tomorrow morning. And if I'm smart I'll make a lot of phone calls over the weekend because that won't freak me out. And it will all work out. And if I say it enough, while being able to logic that that is all very true because it is, I might even believe it.

It's so much like being a drug addict. I even did use to go to AA and SMART Recovery for it. Which... helped some. And I only hate the cultural christofascism of it a little. And I slipped up and used tonight. It happens. Just have to do better tomorrow. It's never too late to do better.

I just suspect it is going to feel like a very, very long weekend. Probably time for serious distraction coping mechanisms. And I don't look forward to telling my therapist that I self harmed tomorrow morning even after getting a speech about it.

I think I'm pissed that it is this easy to backslide. I really was doing well. I was fucking moving. Finally. Aw shit. So now what?

Difficult conversations and surviving the weekend. Baby steps.

Even this is a baby step. Placing this here instead of running back to a depression blog. If Empty Manuscript is me, then this is part of me, too. And I am better the more toward ALL of me I am instead of cutting myself up into safely separate little masks and identities.

One (or four if we're being technical) backslide isn't the end of the world. I can ALWAYS decide to do better. I want to have done better tonight. And it isn't too late for that.

Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. What do we do? We swim.

#Priest of Brooding #just my life #available but not for public consumption #about me and ONLY about me #unsafe content #diary I guess #self harm #depression #suicidal ideation #how do real people deal with real problems? #it is beyond me #you're all superheroes

[morwensteelsheen]

farawyn and borodred for the ship ask game thing?

thank you so much!! :)

okay i’ll start with borodred because for some unfathomable reason i actually got there first —

1. What made you ship it?

One of my favourite Types of ships is the Elder Statesmen Of War-type set-ups, where it’s less about people brought together through theatrical romantic gestures and more about the steadiness of people who are going through similar (immensely difficult) circumstances, who know that in their hearts they’re always going to put their duty to that cause first, but still seek out human comfort in other people who will understand what their priorities are and why.

I think there’s also a lot of similarities about the kind of helplessness they both face despite having this tremendous innate strength. Both of them still have to deal with family dynamics that are complex (made more complex by the war) and that can’t be fixed just by their own sheer will power; both of them die these utterly unnecessary deaths (not that death makes a ship but I think in this instance it actually points to the constant tragedy these guys face); and both of them are meant to be the principal figures of their families and people and are ultimately sidelined by the cruel mechanisations of war and the forward march of history or whatever wanky term there is for it — my apologies to ep thompson's ghost, dont haunt me bro.

Plus there’s obviously the interesting thread raised when Faramir starts bitching about Gondor and likens Gondor (and by very explicit extension, Boromir) to Rohan. That always made me go ‘Hmmmmmm, wonder what else Boromir liked about Rohan,’ lmao.

Anyways for me the ship is the equivalent of Star Wars’ Kanan and Hera or (my OTP to end all others) Luke and Wedge, just people getting by on love and duty and without big ol fancy romance.

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

The fanon, I think, really makes it, as with so many other LOTR ships. battlefield manners, by themightypen is essentially the definitive take for me on them — these two guys who are just so fucking exhausted, man, but still overcome by defensive love for their families, even if their (foster-)siblings are naïve fools. That I just love, love, love. Plus I think they’re unique for their ability to pretty comfortable explore the relationship between Gondor & Rohan in advance of the Ring War without having to stray too far into AU, which I always appreciate.

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Not really, tbh, except in that I don’t think Boromir is necessarily as laddy as people like to portray him. I’m happy to play into it in, say, my modern AUs because I think that’s a fun and sweet niche for him, but I am a bit 🤪 about Boromir as this kind of reckless, drunken playboy (not least because I think that’s a much funnier niche for Faramir to fill, at least when he’s younger). Chapter Four of Swaddledog’s Hearts and Minds gets my preferred Boromir characterisation absolutely spot on, I think.

And now, sigh, the ultimate OTP, Farawyn —

1. What made you ship it?

For starters, I think I am obsessed with Éowyn in a way I’ve never quite been obsessed with any other fictional character. I came to reading LOTR at this moment in my life where I was intensely frustrated about everything — trapped inside permanently (helplessly!) because of the pandemic, just starting a new political organisation that I truly believed in but that was still making me feel like shit, facing down an untenable about of work, and, fundamentally, really, really hating being a woman and what that means. And along comes Éowyn, who is bitter, who is cold, who is ANGRY, and who doesn’t perform joy or softness or gentleness just because people expect her to. She’s this seminal Woman Of War in so many ways, I think the kind of person a lot of us wish we could be. She’s got her emotional taps cut off at the source, she holds her head high and faces down unimaginable personal and political terrors, and at the end of it all still has this abiding love for her family that, I would argue, is almost unparalleled by anyone else in the book.

After all that, she gets this incredible moment of emotional catharsis (or what we expect to be emotional catharsis): “no living man am I!” She undertakes THE greatest martial act of the Ring War, and in that moment there’s this unbelievably sophisticated dialogue happening about gender (“Éowyn it was, and Dernhelm also”), and leadership (Merry finding his courage not because of the immediate scenario of the Witch-king, but because he’s spurred into it by Éowyn’s presence), and love and care.

And then we learn that no, actually, this glorious act of violence wasn’t the emotional catharsis we thought it would be. She gets to ride to war, she gets to throw herself headlong at death, and in the end that hopeless act of individualism isn’t really what does it for her. She’s still left desolate and despairing, and actually all of her problems haven’t gone away.

And then we need to rewind a bit, because along comes Faramir, who is gentle, and is kind, and does seem to believe in joy, but not because people expect it — actually it's made abundantly clear nobody expects it — but because it’s something quite innate to how he figures the world. And he’s a huge fucking nerd too. I have a lot of thoughts on Faramir’s flaws and why I find them endearing, which I won’t put here, but almost immediately you get this sense of a guy who’s quite melodramatic, good humoured, and very much not made to live in a time of war.

But he’s also clear-headed about war and what it requires (tactically, if not strategically, though that’s a post for another day), but who is kind of cynical and weary of it in his own unique way. And it’s a unique cynicism given his personal circumstances because he’s the second son of The great family of Gondor, he’s apparently — though with some big ol’ question marks hanging about the extent — very able to command some of the elite units in the realm, and what’s more than that, he’s got all these fantastical powers (the light mind reading to start, to say nothing of this apparently magical ability to command animals too. bruh.). By all accounts he should be this brazen hot mess, but he’s not. He’s desperate to claw his way out of this war-torn cage of expectation his people have for how a man should comport himself in time of war. Is it a little naïve? Sure. A little fussy? Absolutely. But does it point to that same desperation that Éowyn has? Yes! But also the practicality, like, neither of them are really enjoying the circumstances they live under, but good fucking god are they both able to Make It Work.

So finally we get to the Houses of Healing and what is the finest and most aggressively romantic writing of LOTR. Seriously, it’s so fucking much. It’s breathtaking. It reminds me quite viscerally of this fabulous quote from Les Mis:

The power of a glance has been so much abused in love stories, that it has come to be disbelieved in. Few people dare now to say that two beings have fallen in love because they have looked at each other. Yet it is in this way that love begins, and in this way only.

At some point I will devote more time to talking about the two reasons line, and the blissful Queen of Gondor speech, but I think to me that big, important line is: “And then her heart changed, or at least she understood it; and the winter passed, and the sun shone upon her.”

It’s not about Éowyn changing herself entirely (though, I think, it really does bear mentioning that she does change, and that’s every bit as important to understanding that scene as it is romantic), it’s about Éowyn coming to terms with how to live with herself as herself, and how to live in communion with someone else. She can’t just cut people out anymore, and she can’t just treat them as objects of infatuation as she did with Aragorn, she has to reckon with people as they are. And that’s sort of the moment where I knew I was about to plunge fully off the deep end with these two and never know a moments’ peace again, lmao.

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

Someone on here once called Farawyn a love letter to women and, by god, yes, exactly that. I love the capacity for emotional intimacy, that is beautiful in ways I can’t express. To me, though, my favourite thing is the promise of life they speak of. Not as in oh they shag loads and have babies (though not opposed to that, obviously), but in the sense that unlike Aragorn and Arwen, who are always going to be buried under/burdened with the crushing weight of history and tradition, Éowyn and Faramir are going out yonder those hills and they’re going to do some real cottagecore farming shit. Obviously with all the trappings of rank and nobility and whatnot, but they, unique to anybody else in the books, get to sow this new idea of what life should be. They are, outside of Aragorn, the single most powerful people in Gondor. Éowyn’s got the ear of a king, a steward (which is essentially a prime-ministerial deal here), and functionally her own prince (if the hobbits are to be believed when they refer to it as essentially hers). I suspect that, in life, there were remarkably few arguments she wasn’t winning, and that Ithilien probably trended towards the jumped up noble hippie camp Tolkien so desperately wanted Oxford to be (or, in other words — Cambridge, lol).

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Yeah, man, everybody stop treating Faramir like he’s a big fucking crybaby and Éowyn like she’s some kind of shrieking 2010-era tumblr girl.

One of the single most important lines defining Faramir’s character is when Denethor roasts his ass for always trying to appear noble and lordly, if you ignore every other piece of textual evidence we have about him, what part of that line makes you think Faramir’s some simpering daisy? And why would you want to link tremendous emotional intelligence and care with being too limp-wristed to function, lol??? Like I struggle loads with writing Faramir, because I have never once in my life tried to be noble or self-restrained, so find it hard to get into that mindset, but better, I think, to imagine him too closed off than to do this wilting flower song and dance lmao.

And stop making Éowyn out to be this over-emotional angst machine. She’s got problems, yes, and she’s sure as shit got a lot of angst, but at almost every point in the book where we’re overtly dealing with her emotions, she’s sublimating them into something else. One of the most serious times we see her cry is when she’s fighting with Aragorn about riding out, and after that moment she literally tries to kill herself. Those tears aren’t standard, man, that’s a real watershed (lol) moment for her. You have to read around what the text is saying to get a better feel why everybody’s constantly calling her cold and distant.

#god this is probably obnoxiously long because i can't do cuts on my phone #but refuse to open the tumblr website on my laptop lmao #faramir #éowyn #boromir #théodred #farawyn #borodred #god sorry for these fucking tags man im just trying to make my blog slightly more organised #i just have a lot of thoughts #i should really write more metas it would probably help my writing out quite a bit #asks #meta

[tinyboxxtink]

Weird Secret Friends *Chapter 3*

I fixed it!!!! Huzzah!!!

If you didn't see it earlier, it was crap-tastic on my phone.

I'm glad so far people love this. <3

Part 2

Part 4

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@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

-------------

When you returned everyone was laughing at chatting, except for Sonny who was drinking vodka and soda while on his phone. He looked up and saw you both returning, he jumped up to meet you.

“Hey, counselor. I hope Y/N wasn’t too hard on you,” He half laughed.

“Are you kidding me, Sonny?” You scoffed.

“She’s fine, Sonny,” He smirked. “I like a little fire in a woman,”

“Oh?” Sonny’s eyebrows suddenly raised, causing you to give Barba a look. He was blowing your cover!

“I mean, I expect it from Jersey girls anyway,” He flipped his compliment quickly.

“God…” You muttered, looking at the floor. Pick a side, counselor.

“Anyway, um,” Sonny cleared his throat, trying not to think about Rafael and you together. “So when do we do presents and cake? I’ve kind of got an early--”

“I’m sorry, what?” Rafael furrowed his brows at Sonny. “Did you-- Carisi did you really just say that?”

“Do you see a present table? Do you see a giant rat mascot running around?”

“...What? Did I say something--?” Sonny became flustered.

“What do you think this is, a fucking Chuck E Cheese?” He suddenly snapped, causing shocked looks from both you and Sonny.

“I’m sorry Barba, I--”

“Alright that’s it,” You stepped in between the two of them, glaring at Rafael.

“Excuse you?” Rafael crossed his arms.

“Y/N, knock it off,” Sonny hit you softly.

“You have been nothing but rude to my cousin since we got here, Mr. Barba,” You pointed a finger to his chest.

“He was just trying to be nice, getting you a gift out of the goodness of his heart, something you would know nothing about!” Maybe now you were overcompensating.

“Y/N!” Sonny said through gritted teeth.

“What?!” You turned to see everyone at the party staring at the three of you in shocked silence. “Oh…” Your voice turned soft, your face turned red.

“Well,” Rafael straightened his suit and tie, recovering from your little rant. “I guess I should be a gracious host and open it then, shouldn’t I?” He gave you a look.

“...Holy shit,” You heard one of the guests gasp. “That thing is over $1,000! My wife wouldn’t even get me that for Christmas,”

“NO!” Sonny objected rather loudly,. “I mean, that’s not necessary Barba. It’s just a little something, it’s fine,”

“No no, your cousin is right,” He shook his head as he walked over next to Sonny’s chair and retrieved the large gift bag and placed it on the table. Sonny bolted over, you trailed behind quickly.

“No, seriously Barba, don’t,” Sonny began to panic. You suddenly realized how this was going to look, maybe you shouldn’t have pushed.

“Carisi why are you being like--” Rafael was questioning him but was silenced mid-speech when he pulled out the briefcase. His eyes went wide, you swore you heard a few people audibly gasp, You looked around completely lost, finally noticing the absolute horror on Sonny’s face.

“....Is this a Louis Voutton Robusto 2 in Taiga leather, Carisi?” Rafael whispered, running his fingers over the fine leather.

“Oh my god,” You couldn't watch this. Sonny had such a big heart, too big of a heart. He tried so hard...why didn’t you step in sooner?

“Uh y-yeah, sure Barba whatever you want,”

“Carisi, can I speak with you a moment outside?” Rafael blinked rapidly, trying to wrap his head around what was happening right now.

“Do you guys need somewhere to make out?!” An obnoxious man laughed, making the other guests snicker.

“Oh shove it Buchanan,” Rita hit him. “Sonny’s just his puppy,”

“Oh god,” Sonny muttered under his breath as he followed Barba outside. He didn’t know which was worse for people to think right now.

“This is totally inappropriate, why would you even--” He threw his hands over his head. God it was one thing knowing Sonny had a thing for him, but for him to finally make a move like this-- in front of his peers? His colleagues? The audacity.

You wondered if you should follow them. You were the one to cause this mess, after all. Also you really didn’t like the looks you were getting from the rest of the party-goers. You quickly began to follow after them, you could hear Rafael yelling from a mile away.

“What the hell is WRONG with you, Carisi?!”

“I-I’m sorry, Barba I--”

“WHAT?!” Sonny’s eyes instantly went to you. “W-Why would you…? Why would you say that?”

“I’m sorry, counselor I just thought--”

“You just thought what, Carisi?” He growled. “That if you bought some ridiculously expensive gift I’d suddenly realized you were ‘the one’?”

“What?!” Sonny suddenly snapped. “What the-- what the fuck are you talking about, Barba?”

“Uh I don’t know Carisi, maybe the fact that you have feelings for me?”

“What?” Rafael suddenly realized either you were wrong, or he was sticking to denial. Either way, he was probably busted.

“I bought you that briefcase because I want you to like me as a COLLEAGUE, Barba. Do you know what kind of clout you get in our field by being friends with the ADA? And-- And nothing I do ever seems to be good enough, I was afraid you’d never...accept me, unless I…”

“Bribed me?” Rafael asked softly.

“I--I don’t know, I--”

“Well,” Sonny shrugged uncomfortably. “When you say it like that it sounds dirty,”

“Right,” Rafael rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“....But why, in the fuck--” Sonny crossed his arms now. “Would you ever accuse me of--- of that?!”

“Is it because you have feelings for me and you were hoping I felt the same way but it freaked you out when I made some ‘declaration of love’ in front of all of your work buddies?”

“WHAT?!” Rafael practically screamed. “Absolutely not--”

“I’m just gonna ask you one time, straight out,” Sonny approached Rafael, his stature over him becoming more obvious the closer he got to the ADA.

“Then why? Have I seriously given you an impression that I-- want your cannoli?” He tried to find an appropriate word. And he was genuinely asking, he had made damn sure not to act that way for so long, there was no way he had fucked that up.

“Uh...yes, yes you have,” Rafael tried to bluff. He had no idea how this situation had flipped, or if it was better for Sonny to think he had feelings for him, and not his baby cousin.

“That’s bullshit,” Sonny shook his head with a sarcastic laugh. “I have made damn sure--” He glanced at you again, he knew that look. That was the same look you had when you had broken his mom’s favorite vase and had blamed it on the dog.

“Damn sure what?” Rafael quickly tried to distract him.

“Damn sure you didn’t think that,” He answered hazily, thoughts filling his mind.

“Because you do,” Rafael tried to keep defensive.

“....This isn’t about me, this is about you,” Sonny’s eyes suddenly narrowed as he was quickly becoming aware of the glances you at Rafael were sharing.

“Ohh no I think it’s about--”

“WHY would you accuse me of trying to...seduce you?!” Sonny cut him off.

“Does that sound like something I would do, whether it was true or not?”

“So it IS--”

“DAMMIT, Rafael!” Sonny stomped his foot. He was getting bold now as the wheels started turning.

“What?” Rafael laughed like it was ridiculous, looking everywhere but Sonny’s eyes. “When would she even--”

“...Did my cousin say something to you?” His eyes were narrow, he was scowling between the two of you. Fuck. FUCK. Don’t panic. Keep your cool. Don’t move.

“When you followed her just now?” He crossed his arms again.

Whew. Well, thank God. At least that bullet was dodged.

"Was she? Because it seems like telling you was the worst thing she could do!!!" Sonny snapped.

“....She might have said something along those lines,” Rafael glanced at you with apologetic eyes as he threw you under the bus.

“Wha-- are you kidding me?!” You hissed at him, but Sonny was already fuming at you.

“Y/N!!! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He started to stomp over to you. “You can’t just throw your assumptions at people, because you think your ‘emotionally stunted’ cousin can’t deal with some confusing feelings he has,”

“Uh…”

“Ya can’t just SHOVE someone out of a closet!” He kept yelling, oblivious to the stares he was now getting. “Especially not to my boss!!!”

“Sonny, I--”

“See I knew it!” Rafael clapped his hands together, trying to rescue you after he threw you to the sharks. “I knew you had feelings for me, I didn’t need her to tell me,”

“FINE,” Sonny threw his hands up. “Fine, Rafael. You win, okay?” He struggled with tears forming in his throat. “Yeah, I’ve had some-- weird, feelings about you. For a while,”

You and Rafael just stared at him while he “came out” to an entire restaurant.

“And alright, maybe I went a little overboard with the gift, my bad,” He shrugged. "But that doesn't excuse Y/N for telling you her conspiracy theories!"

"Carisi…" Barba sighed. "She was just trying to help."

"Y'know what YN, would you mind finding somewhere else to crash tonight, i can't really look at you right now," he sighed as he turned and walked awkwardly out of the restaurant.

"Sonny I am so--" you tried to apologize.

"Well you heard the man," He grinned, totally unphased by what just happened.

"I'm sure he'll--" his face went from a soft smile into a horrified expression.

"Are you fucking kidding me Rafael?" You scoffed at him in disbelief.

"Well at least he doesn't suspect anything between us!" He pointed out.

"Yeah just that I'm a horrible outing twat," you rolled your eyes.

"Aw carino," He pulled you into a soft comforting kiss.

"What's wrong?" You asked softly, afraid to turn around.

"How fucking DARE you say that, Barba. I'm not some fucking jealous teenager, although clearly that's your type,"

"Oh my god..." you heard Sonny's voice behind you. "Oh my God!"

You definitely didn't want to turn around now.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Sonny now stormed over to the two of you.

I can't fucking believe you Y/N! What the fuck is this? How did this happen?"

"Sonny I--" You tried to explain,

"And YOU--" He glared at Rafael. "You had the fucking audacity to sit there and start yelling at me for "inappropriate feelings'," he growled.

"Carisi…." Rafael put a hand up.

"What the fuck do you call seducing my baby cousin??" He snarled.

'Look Carisi I know you might be jealous, but--" Before Rafael could finish his sentence, Sonny's fist was hitting his face and he fell to the ground.

"Hey!" You exclaimed.

"This isn't about my feelings, jackass," he went to punch him again but you ran over and tried to pull him off Rafael as a crowd of spectators was forming.

"Which by the way, you have zero worry of those anymore, I'm not into perverts," he spat.

"Sonny!" You gasped. "...the hell is wrong with you?!"

"We're leaving," he instructed you.

"Like hell we are," you went to help Rafael up.

"Sonny, even if you were my dad, I'm a grown woman," you snapped. "You can't drag me out of here like a child,"

"YN," Sonny had that soft, scary, angry tone. "I practically raised you. I'm the closest thing you have to a dad. So when I say we're leaving, we're leaving."

"Either you come with me right now, or I'm disowning you," he threatened.

"Are you fucking kidding me Son?" You laughed at the absurdity of the threat.

"I'll stop paying for your classes at the community college," he threatened.

Well not only did he just threaten your academics but he embarrassed the hell out of you revealing you weren't even in a real college.

"So?" You stood your ground. "Go for it,"

"I'll stop paying your rent," He kept going.

"Well that's--" You started getting nervous.

"I'll stop payments on your car,"

"OKAY," You finally caved. You just wanted to stop revealing what a fucking sad sack you were having him pay for everything, just like a dad.

You looked at Rafael who was standing now, winding his bloody mouth with a handkerchief from a pocket in his suit.

"I'm sorry," you barely whispered with tears in your eyes and throat. The last thing You wanted to do was leave him there but as Sonny so blatantly pointed out, he basically owned you.

You gave him one last long kiss goodbye, to which Sonny made a disgusted scoff.

Rafael gave you a look of pleading, begging you to stay with him while he held onto your hand. You pulled your hand away from him and turned to Sunny

"Alright let's go Son," you said softly trying not to glance back at Rafael.

Sonny nodded triumphantly and walked out of the restaurant with you close behind, leaving Rafael alone.

#rafael barba #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba x you #law and order svu #rafael barba fanficton #law and order svu fanfiction #weird secret friends

[vs-redemption]

I love Soft Saturday/Sunday! :3 I remember you posted a selfship of yourself and I wanted to try one for me lol so, here goes! It was a bit hard/weird because I don't think any of these wonderful guys would be with me ^^U It was still fun to do though!

1.) Belle x Todoroki, Shouto (Bellouto? Shoutelle? Belloroki?)

- I'd probably be very distant with Todoroki at first because of his cold demeanor. It would have to be Midoriya who would get us together.

- We would end up sitting together at the same lunch table, chatting with our group of friends. Eventually our love for noodles would bring us closer. I would buy him some different types of cold soba or even show him unique recipes to try out. If I ever see anything soba related, I'd text him and say "Look! I thought of you! It's your fave ^^"

- Once he opens up about his past, I'd probably get teary eyed and give him a big hug. I'd thank him for trusting me enough with his childhood memories and I'd also eventually open up to him about my own hardships.

- I would give him all my love without smothering him. I'd just want to show him the love and care he deserves especially since he didn't have much of it growing up.

- I think it's the little things that might make Todoroki fall for me. Things like bringing him tea when he's studying late, if he fell asleep before setting up his alarm, I'd put one on his phone and on my own just to make sure he'd wake up on time, praising/acknowledging all of his big and small accomplishments, getting his favorite food when he's sad/had a rough day, sending him cute text messages like "Good morning, handsome!" or even doing something like this:

Me and Todoroki: *studying intensely*

Me: *gasps loudly* OMG

Todoroki: What? O_O

Me: I love you. (´,,•ω•,,)♡

🙈

2.) Belle x Miya, Atsumu (Bellumu? Biya? Atsubelle?)

- I'd have to have known him for a long time before we'd date. Kind of like childhood friends to lovers? If I met him at an older age, I might think he was a jerk and wouldn't want to go out with him.

- I wouldn't be afraid to call him out. Like when Atsumu is having his "if you can't hit my toss then you shouldn't be on the team" moment, I'd probably punch his arm and scold him.

- I'd have to turn it around and tell him "what if someone told you that?" or "treat others the way you want to be treated". I think he'd like that I don't treat him any different or baby him.

- Since we're childhood friends, we're already comfortable with each other. We've also seen, heard, and been through a lot together. We'd know silly small things about each other like "Atsumu always listens to this song right before a game" or "His right eye always twitches 3 times before he sneezes"

- He's seen me go through some relationships and has seen how I've acted/treated the person I'm dating. Atsumu would see that I put in a lot of effort and the stuff I'd do for my previous boyfriends. I think that would eventually make him want to ask me out. It'd be something that he might want to experience, too. Like how it would feel to hold my hand or share a loving embrace.

- When we'd get angry at each other, it could get a bit loud, but we would resolve things quickly.

- Our relationship would also be fun and full of silliness and lovely surprises. He'd do something like honk the horn right when I'm passing in front of his car to get to the passenger side. Atsumu would also surprise me with a gift that I've been eyeing or even a spontaneous trip to somewhere!

3.) Belle x Kageyama, Tobio (Bellayama? Tobelle? Kagelle?)

- We met at a mutual friend's party in college. We'd probably talk about how we were basically dragged there.

-I love to party/hang out, but when I have something to do/ a goal, I strive hard to accomplish it. (ugh, getting some PTSD from nursing school lol)

-We would end up talking about our ambitions and what we hope to end up doing in our lives. After becoming friends for a while, we'd get on the topic of relationships. We'd both want someone who is patient and understands that when we're busy, we're not ignoring them. We're studying/practicing.

-I think that is what convinces both of us to start a relationship.

-We're both busy and can get stressed out easily, but we'd know what to do to ease the stress a little. Like giving Kageyama different flavored milk cartons.

-It would look like we don't spend much time together/don't really act like a couple, but when we have free time, we'd be spending it with each other.

-We'd get our nails done together. （〃・ω・〃）

-We'd both have to think about how great it would be when we get settled with our careers and that we'd have more time to spend together. Planning future adventures/vacations is our motivation.

-Even though I'd miss Kageyama dearly, I totally understand how it feels like when you have other obligations. I'd never want to get in the way of his goal so I would do my best to support him and show my love in any way that I can and that would be something he might love about me.

First off, all three of these amazing boys would love you to pieces! You are so thoughtful and kind and they'd be foolish not to fall for you! I accept no arguments about this. 😊 This got way out of hand so... gonna put my rambling below a cut.

Send me some soft headcanons

Let's talk Todoroki! Gonna be honest... I don't know if I trust Midoriya to play cupid 😂 Of course, meeting Todoroki through him makes sense, but you know who zeros in on how cute you two look together immediately? Yes, it's Mina! Thankfully she's not obnoxious about it, but she does have your back. She expertly manipulates every situation to give you and Todoroki a chance to interact. Somehow, thanks to her, he always ends up sitting/standing right next to you in class, at lunch, in training, on the bus, on the sofa in the common room... EVERYWHERE.

Poor boy would be so confused at first by your attention. Like, of course he doesn't mind being your friend, but nobody else texts or talks to him about his interests outside of hero stuff. He didn't even know anyone noticed he liked soba that much. And all the little things you do for him like bringing him tea or setting an alarm, he's not used to it. He doesn't hate it though. Actually, he kind of likes it. And I just want you to prepare yourself for the day when he takes the initiative and your phones lights up with a message from him for the first time with a picture of some random thing that made him think of you. *my heart would explode*

It's all downhill after that because he really likes the way you respond when he reciprocates your kindness. The flustered look on your face when he brings you some of his sister's homemade soba noodles for lunch, the cute emojis you use in your texts when he messages you first in the morning, and the shy smile you give him when he finds the courage to compliment you. He's never wanted to take care of someone the way he wants to take care of you before.

ATSUMU. You're totally right. I'm the same as you in that I would not trust this little shit for a while after meeting him. Childhood friends to lovers is nice because you there's no way you wouldn't know the real Atsumu. The idea of you knowing little personal things about each other is so cute too. Atsumu takes advantage of this and always gives the best gifts for birthdays and holidays. And he's always so excited to watch you open what he got because he KNOWS you'll love it because he knows YOU.

I'd like to say that he'd be into the fact that you treat him normally like anyone else, but something tells me he would actually expect special treatment since you two are close friends. It would surprise him a little every time you reprimand him for being rude to his teammates or fighting with his brother. He respects you more than anyone else in his life though, so he always straightens up his act just as soon as you give him that look. He hates when you're angry or annoyed at him, so of course he'll be on his best behavior for you. Honestly, he'd do anything to get positive attention from you. (He's already such a simp for you and he doesn't even realize)

He thinks he's just being a protective friend when he criticizes all your previous boyfriends. None of them are even that terrible but in his eyes, nobody treats you the way you should be treated and nobody would ever be good enough. He puts you on a pedestal to be honest. And yes, once you're together it would be full of teasing and giggles and he would absolutely take it too far and overdo it sometimes and get himself into trouble, but it's okay because you know he never means to upset you. He's just so excited and in love with you.

Kageyama's turn. Oh my god! This boy would be so awkward at a college party. He'd probably just be all tall and weird standing in the corner like 😳 what's happening? Thank goodness for you, coming over to talk to him ... but wait... you're so cute... WHY are you talking to him? Now he's flustered for a different reason and he tries his best to have a normal casual conversation with you but he stumbles over his words a bit but bless your heart, you pretend not to notice and continue smiling at him. He thinks you are SO PRETTY!! omg😭

A huge weight lifts off his chest when you start talking about your goals. He knows about goals. That's easy. The look on his face is kind of scary at first because it looks like he's scowling, but he is just listening very intently to you and absorbing every single word. He almost seems like a different person when you let him talk to you about volleyball. His whole face lights up and he's talking very enthusiastically with his hands. He apologizes for ranting at you afterwards, but is also amazed that you'd stayed and let him talk so long.

Being around you IS a huge stress relief. At first he's worried about not spending enough time with you or making you think he's not interested because of his awkward mannerisms. But you're always super understanding and patient with him. Plus, you're just as busy working towards your own dreams. He supports you as much as he can just as you do for him and falling into a relationship is just really easy and natural for the two of you.

Kageyama doesn't really know how to do big extravagant dates, so just being able to take walks with you, or do activities like doing your nails together is enough to make him happy. He WANTS to do more for you though. He would never admit to this, but he actually has a small list of things he plans to do once you both have more time. He pays attention to what you might even consider silly throwaway comments like "One day we should...." or "Sometime I'd like to...." He writes it all down because even if they aren't career goals, those are still things you want which makes them very important to him.

#belle💖 #best moot squad #sorry I kinda... went crazy with this #Shoto Todoroki #Atsumu Miya #Tobio Kageyama

[elenatria]

That moment in the 1x02 Chernobyl episode when Bryukhanov attacks Legasov because he can't tell how the reactor can explode, then mocks him, and Legasov is troubled, so Boris steps up and asks Bryukhanov about the graphite on the roof, and he's like "How dare you? Only I can yell at Valery. Am I clear?" And my heart bursted.

HHAHAHAHHA omg it never occurred to me to see it that way?? Brilliant. A want a ficlet on that scene.

You know what, it’s about time people got to know why this pairing is so hot and tragic and inspiring and and… And I mean I’m not crazy for shipping them, am I?? I mean ok ok “real people with tragic destinies” etc etc but but b-but the writer and the actors are doing SUCH a great job giving us the enemies-to-friends (or lovers) trope so effortlessly in a matter of, like, two episodes (btw I didn’t need two episodes, just the first time they met was enough for me to ship them hahah am I nuts or am I nuts). 

Alright, SPOILERS.

So at the end of the first episode Boris Shcherbina, the head of the Bureau for Fuel and Energy (aka aggressive, unapologetic apparatchik and bureaucrat), is calling Valery Legasov,  the first deputy director of the Kurchatov Institute of Atomic Energy (aka awkward nerdy idealist scientist), to bark some orders at him and essentially tell him “We don’t want your opinion, nerd, you’re here to answer questions, nothing more, kbye.” So at their very first contact Boris is rude, entitled and arrogant to Valery, even hanging up on him.

In the second episode Valery reads Boris’ report and freaks out. When he joins General Secretary Gorbachev’s committee, Boris tries to downplay  the disaster, his arms sprawled out all over the armchair as if nothing happened. and looks at Valery in utter disbelief when the scientist tries to convince everyone how serious things are. Obviously Boris would rather be home with his wife or something. Btw in the show Valery doesn’t have a wife, he only has a cat, cat=loneliness, geddit?

When Gorbachev orders them both to visit the power plant Boris cannot believe his ears. He’s stuck with this annoying nerd, a scientist for crying out loud, a know-it-all, the kind he obviously hates because, as an apparatchik, he probably climbed the social ladder through his connections in the party and not through studying. So he obviously loathes anyone who knows more than him. He’s an alpha and wants to remain one.

Look at his face and body language when they’re left alone, he’s totally blaming the Nerd for becoming a burden. His burden.

Here it is, the “unlikely partners” trope. 

And now things start to get interesting.

As they walk towards the helicopter Boris is totally ignoring Valery. They’re not exchanging a single glance.

In the helicopter Boris asks Valery how a nuclear reactor works. Valery finds it difficult to explain and Boris quickly shows how inferior he feels to anyone who has studied more than him, so he puts on his aggressive and arrogant facade.

He acts SO entitled that he even threatens Valery that he’ll have him killed if he doesn’t explain how the reactor works.

At this point Boris inspires nothing but fear and disgust.

HOWEVER when Valery fidgets his pockets trying to find something to write on Boris is quick to give him both a pen and a piece of paper. Even if he has his poker face on, his gesture is clear. He’s helping Valery for the first time and not just because he wants to learn about reactors.

When Boris quickly catches the metaphor of the neutron being like a “bullet” Valery seems startled. Apparently Boris is a good student, who would have thought!

But as soon as the explaining is over Boris shuts Valery out once more saying he doesn’t need him anymore. Entitled and arrogant af.

Now it’s Valery’s turn to seethe internally because he’s stuck with this total asshole. 

Aaaaand then we get to the part when I totally flinched in surprise and I was like… “Okayyyyy do they want us to ship them now or what?…”

Because Valery, in a state of panic, finds the courage (or might I say, has the nerve) to call Boris by his first name (back then Soviet people would call each other by both names as a sign of respect). Valery probably mimicked Gorbachev using “Boris” in the previous scene but Boris simply. Won’t. Have it. 

He instantly snaps at the unexpected intimacy and I’m over here fangirling like crazy because who else would snap at terms of endearment and intimacy but a man who’s not used to it - and is probably craving for it. But not from this carrot-headed Nerd. Definitely not from him, he loathes the guy, okay??

Boris exercises his power once more threatening to have the pilot shot if he doesn’t fly over the reactor and for the first time Valery manages to “outrank” him by explaining to the pilot why he’d rather be shot than fly over the reactor. Valery convinces the pilot to disobey Boris - power play at its best. Boris is clearly defeated, maybe he’s never been defeated before.

And this is the first time Boris touches Valery (hopefully not the last).

As the helicopter turns to avoid the reactor Valery trips and almost falls on Boris’ lap. Notice how Boris doesn’t push him away but he rather steadies him and helps him sit. For a man who loathes his partner and is not used to intimacy he’s rather… well-behaved.

Of course the look on his face when the scene ends says it all: “You’ll pay for this, nerd.”

We’re 25 minutes into the episode and we finally see a glint of doubt in Boris’ eyes when Chief Engineer Fomin and the plant’s director Bryukhanov mouth off to Valery, disrespecting him and questioning his expertise and patriotism. For some reason something clicks inside Boris. Maybe he too had dealt with too many people doubting him and treating him like shit in the past. Maybe he feels Valery, for all his obnoxiousness, doesn’t deserve that kind of behaviour. Maybe the proud Head of the Bureau for Fuel and Energy will lose face if his partner is disgraced. Another nanosecond of doubt and he decides to step up. He uses Valery’s observations to talk about the core exploding.

At first I thought “Oh goooood I can’t believe this asshole is ripping off Valery’s observations to act all clever in front of his inferiors. What an asshole.”

But it turns out that he’s siding with Valery and starts to trust his judgement and expertise. Maybe because, for all his lack of formal education, he’s too clever to not know suck ups, cowards and liars when he sees them.

Next he challenges the two men to prove Valery wrong. Perhaps he does want to prove Valery wrong and ridicule him. Or perhaps he’s rooting for him already.

When Valery pushes him to evacuate Pripyat, Boris snaps again. He’s not here to follow the Nerd’s orders.

But the very next minute Boris walks away with the promise to get Valery as much boron and sand as he needs to put out the fire, like a king eager to impress his betrothed. “I’m going to get YOU.”

As soon as Boris leaves, General Pikalov is quick to offer Valery some help.

Because they both know they have long days and long nights ahead of them.

I will come back to the subject of the hotel in my next post. There’s another fanfiction trope right there, two unlikely partners forced to stay in the same hotel (or hotel room if you want your imagination to run wild). YESSSS.

Cut to the hotel room. An exhausted Valery massages his own neck (oh baby I’m sure you would like someone else to massage it for you.)

Boris enters his room (*their* room..?) without knocking - apparently someone doesn’t feel the need to lock his door. 

Boris is happy to announce they’ve been successful at dropping sand and boron into the reactor but Valery doesn’t share his cheerfulness.

AND THIS IS WHEN BORIS STARTS CARING ABOUT VALERY’S OPINION AND FEELINGS. The “what?” cliche when someone is not reacting while his friend/lover is begging for a response. Because. Boris. Needs. Valery’s. Approval. That’s why.

Valery insists that the city should be evacuated and Boris reassures him that they’re staying there “so it must be safe.”

But the way he utters those words in a hoarse whisper, shaking his head confidently, is almost like he’s saying “I’m glad we are staying here. Together.”

When Valery gets carried away and slaps Boris in the face with the horrible truth, Boris loses the ground beneath him.

But he doesn’t look just shocked. He looks hurt. Hurt that Valery didn’t sweeten the pill for him. 

Valery instantly regrets his bluntness and takes a step towards Boris as if to comfort a helpless child. Or a very good friend. But he can’t really hug him, shush him and tell him everything is going to be okay, can he? So he takes a step back.

“I’m sorry”…? What?? You just met the guy and you hate him and he hates you! Get a grip!!!

Boris feels so horrible that it takes him ages to pick up the phone.

When they join Gorbachev’s committee again to brief him on the crisis Boris seems totally lost, a fact that doesn’t go unnoticed by Valery who stares at him, concerned.

When Boris finally comes to terms with his own mortality he steps up once more, taking control of the situation. Valery fails to convince the workers to go to the basement and open the valves and that moment…  I just knew it was Boris’ turn for a glorious inspirational speech. And boy, does he deliver. Best, most laconic, most convincing inspirational speech I’ve ever seen. He appeals to the workers’ patriotism and self-sacrifice and he succeeds. So he’s not educated and he’s not as clever as a scientist but his true talent shines here, that of leadership. Inspiring people to do the right thing, like a true general. They’re at war and Boris knows he’s the man for the job. 

And now it’s Valery’s turn to look at him in utter awe.

“That’s him. That’s my guy.”

And I haven’t even talked about episode 3 yet. 

Oh god, ep 3, I mean…

#spoilers #chernobyl #jared harris #stellan skarsgard #valery legasov #boris shcherbina #valoris

[muzeez]

Sunday

10th May 2020

Sunday

21:22

Today has been cloudy and windy and guess what?? There's been no sign of Henrietta, Merlin, Persia or Folie. They've kept their behinds indoors all day long. It's not rained and it's not been cold but it's not been good enough for them.

So, a cloudy sky and a slight wind can keep them indoors but the thought of a killer disease that they could inadvertently kill others with can't keep them indoors. Which just proves my point. Most people will only play by their own rules, no matter how dangerous the consequences are to others. Yet, they'll be the very ones what bang on the most about how much they care about the NHS and moan about how lockdown is affecting them so badly. When the sun's been out they've not even tried to stay inside. They've just been doing what they've always done on a sunny day and today they've done what they've always done on a non-sunny day.

I've still had to have my white noise playing all day though because Henrietta has been "facetiming" and talking loudly and obnoxiously. At about 5pm ish,I turned my white noise off because I needed to phone Rasbach about something.

As soon as I turned it off, the first thing I noticed was that Henrietta was totally silent.??! Makes me wonder if she can hear my white noise and because she knows her voice isn't reaching me she gives up. Bitch!! Another thing I've noticed is that when I play my white noise, the window and door banging seems to begin. Henrietta with her windows (it can be like 6 or 7 window shutting slams all consecutive and aggressive. She's only got three windows.) Then there's Persia and Folie with the slamming of the doors. Then there's Merlin with his feet and thuds, like he's dropping a bowling ball on the floor.

It might sound like paranoia on my part when I say this but I believe they're all secretly messaging eachother in spite of and against me.

Maybe I am a little bit paranoid but I'm certainly not stupid. Not entirely anyway. 😂

At seven o'clock I turned it onto BBC1 because Boris Johnson was doing a speech about taking steps to lift the lockdown. Suddenly, Henrietta started talking loud!!

'Bitch!' I thought to myself. Shows you how little of a f**k she gives about what's going on. Her facetiming is more important than the information we're about to receive on coming out of lockdown. Also, I found it odd that she would start smack on seven o'clock.

I turned the tele up so her high pitch, irritating, aggressive, nasal voice wasn't cutting into Boris's words but I could still hear her. I sighed in exasperation and jumped to my feet (without making a thud on the floor... it's possible) and went to my little stereo to put my white noise on. It's only that that seems to drowned her out. Cue the banging and the slamming. The white noise doesn't drown that out.

If I ever confront them. I say 'them' because they're in a click and I know that if I'm confronting one they'll all be jumping in. If I confront them about things, they'll probably turn around and be like, 'oh what about you, the other day, slamming your door and screaming and what about when you play your music and what about that white noise and what about when you're talking.

Door slamming and screaming abuse. There's a big difference between one off episodes of out of control rage and malicious, continuous deliberate banging and slamming and talking loud on a daily basis.

Playing my music and singing. I play my music at a reasonable time during the day at a volume that I'm entitled to play it at that time of day. I've never played my music late at night, which funnily enough Henrietta has, when she's had karaoke parties and Merlin has on a couple of occasions on a Saturday and Friday nights through to daylight. Which, I don't mind, music is a good thing but don't dare have a go at me for playing mine loud during the day.

White Noise. Henrietta, you talk extremely loudly and not just on one off occasions. Ev-er-y single day for 10 whole years. Somedays, I've known you to start your "facetiming" at 8am in the morning and you'll carry on all through the day, through to the evening and you've even carried on till after 12 midnight, shouting and laughing and making childish yobbish jeering noises like you're in the middle of a bustling nightclub. Over the years it's contributed to me drinking, developing ear infections because of using blu-tac as earplugs. These things have played a massive part in me having massive mood swings at work, to me becoming ill and being, I'll be totally honest, Mentally Unstable, you know, over a long stretch of time. Earlier this year, I discovered that white noise is the only thing that has drowned you out and stopped me having to have my tv on so loud. After 10 years of suffering with your shouting Henrietta and your constant heavy footed pacing the floor, you are not going to make out my white noise, which is a neutral noise by the way, is bothering you.

As for me talking. Again, there's a big difference between one off conversations I have on my phone, one off rants that I'll admit I've had, due to the exasperation you guys have put me through and constant agitated shouting, childish jeering, heavy footed pacing, loud SEX, (yes I heard that). Things which are constant and relentless and I feel alot of the time malicious and deliberately inconsiderate. There's a massive difference between my noise and your noise. Mainly because it's your noise that has triggered the majority of my noise and I'm NOT doing mine out of malice.

Also, don't get me started with drunken returns from the pub with Jack the drunk. Screaming abuse effing and blinding, dropping trails of kebab meat allover the foyer, crashing into the walls. Those haven't been one offs either, they've been every single night. Late.

Then there's Persia. Folie's not always been on the scene but having Persia next door has had more than it's fair shares of trouble. Different boyfriend every month, thugs trying to kick her door in then making gun gestures towards MY window shouting 'WATCH! WATCH!" Blatant drug purchases right outside the building.

All that what I've had to put up with from you guys and then you all wanna get into a little exclusive click with eachother, clapping for the NHS but then creating your own rules when it comes to lockdown , so-called "social distance" gatherings right outside my window and outside the main entrance of the building where other people have to pass you all, attracting other individuals from other buildings to approach, chatting, faces uncovered, 2 metre rules gradually turning into 1 metre, drinking alcohol. You welcome Asbo George with open arms who lives God knows where and who once threatened to smash my face in and put my windows through and doesn't even fucking LIVE HERE.

You're all laughing and joking and being boisterous, then I stop by for 5 seconds on my way to get essentials and you're putting on an amicable act but I'm picking up on all the little mannerisms and body language and you allowed that Bastard Asbo George to start having a go at me about stuff at work, which he's totally wrong on and slagging off my friend Rasbach then waving sarcastically at me when I go inside.

All these subtle shady behaviours all because what? Because you've maybe heard some raw hometruths about yourselves in my one off meltdowns. Which you can't prove I was talking about any of you anyway because I don't mention people's real names when I'm ranting or talking on the phone when it comes to complaints. So, if you think you've heard your name you've MISheard but that's what happens when you evesdrop, you can get the wrong end of the stick (apart from when I hear someone telling someone else that I work at ******* and mimicking a banging noise just after I had banged on the floor.) And even IF I had used your proper names, so fucking what? I'm saying nothing that isn't true and what I've suffered, at your hands, this last ten years totally outweighs any anything you can say against me. I'm not saying I'm perfect but I'm pretty damn fucking close. Because I think, I'm a thinker, I take people to heart, I learn people's names, I'm aware of people and who they are as people. I don't have a desire to mess with people's heads, I don't set out to manipulate people or make friends with a person just for the sake of alienating another. I set out to treat everyone with respect and like human beings because I am one.

So, maybe it's about time you as my neighbours started taking a leaf out of my book and stop acting territorial over a building that we are ALL tenants in. You don't own the outside of this building, just you four. There's other people that live here including me and you need to stop being clicky with eachother, so you think you've got the power to behave as you want, sit where you want and ostracize people just because you don't like the look of their face. Everybody here is a tennant and everybody is a human being with equal rights and if I'm forced to confront any of you again about your unreasonable, inconsiderate persecutory behaviour, towards me or any of the other tennants and you try again to argue with me and throw things back at me, I will report you without any hesitation and I won't be as polite as I'm being now.

Maybe you can start behaving right now by getting your arses indoors and abiding PROPERLY to these lockdown regulations.

Don't make me suggest it twice. 😁😁😁😁😁

Oh and Henrietta, if Asbo George turns up, you ignore the door because he's nothing but a user and a bully. I know you've been letting him in your flat and I also know that deep down you are worried about your health and Coronavirus but you feel you can't say no to him and to looking after his dog. If he starts being persistent you call the police. Don't let him push you around. He's an arsehole and if the police are useless or he starts turning nasty and I have to come downstairs and run his ugly arse out the building, I will. Because right now, I'm in the fucking mood cos if he thinks he can be threatening and intimidating, I'll show him threatening and intimidating. In fact, I'll make it so he daren't even show his claaart passed his own front door.

[xennariel]

Writing prompt: Xenn sprains her ankle real bad and has to spend the day taking it easy. Can't go hunt monsters, can't really leave the house. How does she act? What kind of thoughts does she work through? How close does she come to killing her adoptive brother? (I forgot his name, rip)

Lol You’re fine since he’s an ass and pretty forgettable. He’s a plot device that used to have a bigger part. He wasn’t always such an ass. I still need his character because otherwise it’s not plausible that Xen’s adoptive parents would leave her, at 17, to be in charge of the cafe. SO, Jesse is a needed plot device, but one I no longer really have much of a place for, so in comes your generic “god I hate that guy, what an ass” because not everyone can be a nice and likable person. Lol

ANYWAY, I’m sure this is nothing like what you wanted/were thinking of, but I’m in a fluffy mood so I wanted to maybe write some fluff. Spoilers ahead, but not really because I’m pretty sure everyone knows by now that I ship my own OCs together. Lol Not sure when this would take place, so I guess it’s a little bit AU since they don’t actually get together romantically until the end of book one or even book two (haven’t decided on that one yet). Thank you so much for requesting something with my OCs! This was fun to write even if it did take a while.

———-

A sprained ankle. One she couldn’t completely mend with her meager healing magic abilities. How loathe Xennariel was to admit that she was rendered nearly useless by such a minor, ridiculous thing.

She sat on her window seat, a book about portal magic in her hands and Shakuran curled up at her feet on the opposite side of the cushioned bench. Her injured foot was propped on one of the plethora of pillows that adorned the aforementioned window seat. All she was missing was a cup of tea and the situation would have actually been somewhat relaxing. Instead, the only other person home was Jesse and he was no help at all. His presence only served to make her day that much more irritating. He was lucky the cafe was closed for the weekend or he would have actually been forced to do his job. She could hear him talking on the phone in his room a floor below her. He was loud and obnoxious, no doubt flirting with some woman he wasn’t able to meet with due to the weather.

Rain pelted the window next to her and thunder rolled loud enough to shake the house. She glanced up from her book to watch the trees sway in the wind. Even without her injury, hunting down monsters probably wouldn’t have been the best idea with the storm that was brewing. Sighing, she went back to her book. Best to distract herself before the quiet made her think of things she wished to keep buried.

A bang outside made her pause in her reading again, listening intently to try to determine if it was just the wind or something she needed to worry about. Jesse’s voice had quieted she noticed, so maybe it was just him leaving? But in that storm? It was unlikely. Setting her book in her lap, she was about to crack open the French windows when they flew open before she’d even touched them. Shakuran’s head shot up and he growled. Magic energy manifested above Xen’s outstretched hand, ready to hurl it at whatever had opened her windows.

A dark figure stepped onto the sill. The figure wore a an overcoat with the hood up, but Xen recognized who it was and relaxed, the magic in her hand dissolving into the air. The figure stepped over her legs onto the window seat cushion, jostling the seats occupants and the pillows. Shakuran huffed and glared at the figure.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Xennariel spoke, closing the French windows and raising a brow at the figure now standing in her bedroom.

Loki took off the hood of his coat and shook out his dark hair.

“I needed to escape that damnable party my father was hosting. All those high ranking military officers and politicians were getting on my nerves.”

He continued to shed his coat while talking, revealing a three piece suit underneath. A mandatory outfit for the party he’d ran out on.

“Rather face a raging thunderstorm, huh? Does he know you left?”

“I’d hope not, but honestly, I don’t even care at this point.” That was when he noticed her propped, bare foot and that she was wearing a t-shirt and flannel pajama bottoms. “Did something happen?”

Xen shrugged and snapped her book shut, throwing across to her bed a few feet away.

“Sprained ankle,” she muttered with a scowl.

“Sprained ankle?” A smirk found it’s way to Loki’s lips and he snickered quietly. “What, is that all it takes for the great demon Xennariel to be defeated?”

Xennariel frowned and threw a pillow at Loki’s head when he started chuckling. He wasn’t expecting it and it hit him in the face, sending him teetering off balance for a moment. He caught the pillow as it fell from his face, his grin even wider.

“You know very well my healing magic is shit, you idiot. So, yes, I am forced to rest and heal like you weak ass mortals.”

“Aw, how unfortunate. Having to scrape by like the rest of us losers… Speaking of losers, have you murdered Jesse yet?”

“Nah, came close though. Wouldn’t even help me out finding the ankle brace I know we have somewhere in this house. Said he was too busy waiting for a call from a girl. He’s such an ass. I wouldn’t want to upset his parents by killing him though. They’re good people, at least.”

“Hm, what a little shit. He’s as bad as the slimy guests my father has over right now.” Loki threw the pillow back at Xennariel and she caught it before it hit her. She rolled her eyes and gave Loki a look that he just scoffed at. “Can I help you with anything?”

“I don’t know, can you?” Xen grinned when Loki raised his brows and crossed his arms. “Eh, doesn’t matter,” she said, swinging her legs over the side of the window seat and gingerly testing how much pressure she could put on her ankle before it hurt too much.

Loki tossed his coat over the chair at Xen’s desk and wandered down the stairs and out of her room without a word. Xen stood and hobbled to the railing to look down at the door to her room. He left it slightly ajar and she thought she could hear the tinkling of glass in the vicinity of the kitchen.

She knew she wouldn’t be able to get down the stairs easily, so she shrugged and limped to her bed, propping herself up with her pillows and making herself comfortable under the comforter. She placed her portals book on her night stand and when Shakuran jumped onto the bed and curled up beside her, she ran her fingers through his thick, soft fur as her mind wandered to places she’d been trying her best to avoid. Not being able to do anything to distract herself had more than one downside for her. Having more time to think meant that, more often than not, she would make herself upset and homesick. Homesick for a place that was no longer the flourishing, beautiful land she remembered.

The door to her room creaked open and when it clicked closed it pulled Xen from her thoughts. Heavy footfalls sounded up the stairs until Loki came into view. Xennariel blinked at the mug in his hands. He noticed her staring as he approached and he held the steaming mug out to her.

“I thought you might like some tea.”

Xen raised her brow and took the mug from him. The tea’s aroma was fragrant and sweet and somehow reminded her of a time long past. She took a sip and her eyes widened. The flavor was sweet and heady with the tastes of cinnamon, honey, nutmeg, and cardamom among others. It reminded her so much of the tea her mother used to give her when she wasn’t feeling well. How Loki had managed to replicate the flavor so well baffled and moved her.

“How? How did you know the right flavors to use to make Kyorien Tea?”

Loki sat on the edge of her bed and shrugged, a soft smile on his face.

“I remember you mentioning it once before.”

“You… I mentioned it once and you remembered?”

“Well, yeah, I–”

Loki was cut off as Xennariel placed her tea on her nightstand and flung her arms around his neck, burying her face into his shoulder.

“Thank you,” she breathed, voice muffled by the scratchy material of his suit.

His surprise wearing off, Loki wrapped his arms around Xennariel, his gentle smile reappearing. Xennariel’s breath hitched and he ran his fingers through her hair.

“Are you… Crying?”

“Shut up,” Xen said, shoving his arm. She grabbed the front of his suit and brought him closer, crushing her lips to his. Loki instantly held her closer and returned her sudden, unusual display of affection. When she pulled away, he chuckled at her adorable expression.

“If that’s your reaction to just bringing you a cup of tea, I should do it more often.”

Xen wiped at her eyes roughly.

“You’re an idiot.”

All signs of humor and sarcasm left Loki’s features and he spoke again, quieter this time.

“I’m sorry I reminded you of home.”

Xen picked up her tea again and shrugged.

“You didn’t. I mean, you did, but I was already thinking about it. The tea just took me by surprise is all.”

Loki brushed her hair out of her face, the long blue strands running like water through his fingers.

“We’ll find a way to get you home soon. I’ll do everything in my power to help you. I promise.”

Xennariel met his gaze and nodded.

“I know… Thank you.”

#grim aria #original stuff #oc xennariel #oc loki #OCs #my writing #xen responds