#how much do you really want her spock?

[marshmellin]

T’Pring, literally legs open, ready to get it: 😏

Spock, picking up the phone on the first ring, mid-foreplay: Sorry, gtg, babe. ✨My captain✨ called.

#how much do you really want her spock? #Chris wouldn’t interrupt PANCAKES to answer the phone #and you’re just not gonna tap that? #Christoper Cock-Block Pike #Vulcanis interruptus #star trek #strange new worlds spoilers #snw spoilers #spoilers #strange new worlds #Spock #s’chn t’gai spock #chris pike #christopher pike #t’pring

[thats-godscomma]

Since rewatching Psych, I've been thinking about how weird and arbitrary Shawn's interests are. Sure, late 2000's writing had something to do with it, and maybe a bit of Henry and Gus's influence, but hearing Shawn be so vocal about how he hates certain popular things or (more importantly) refuses to give them a chance BUT at the same time knowing so many pop culture references, it got me thinking.

What if the reason Shawn has so many pop culture references on hand is because of his eidetic memory, and he doesn't actually have as much of an interest in pop culture? Throughout the show, he actively avoids getting roped into big interests and franchises (see: comic books, soap operas, etc.) despite the fact that he genuinely seems excited once he's part of it. In fact, we don't get to see a lot of Shawn's interests at all unless it's based on an idea.

Take being a bounty hunter, for example. According to him, he's obsessed with the idea, but he doesn't make many references to an actual bounty hunter show or franchise. Instead, he just remembers the one bounty hunter he saw as a child and maybe references a movie or two. Because once he remembers something, he's never going to forget it, or at least not for a very long time.

That's why he thinks in references. Everything is a reference if you have a good enough memory. Everything reminds you of something. If Shawn hears someone make a Spock reference, it's in his repertoire forever. But he wouldn't be caught dead watching the shows or movies because that's just too much information. Why on earth would he endure that?

Of course, it also intertwines with his ADHD. He has bouts of energy and trouble focusing. He can't sit still to save his life, and he hyperfixates...or he would if his memory didn't make him averse to it. So if he doesn't want to hyperfixate on an information-based interest, then what does he hyperfixate on? Physical activities. Instead of learning about his favorite daredevil, he tries to be one himself. When he learns about oil rigs, he doesn't get a book from the library. He tries to find oil in his backyard.

This is also where he and Henry differ regarding Shawn's "potential." Henry is correct when he talks about Shawn's "wasted" potential, but he doesn't understand the toil of having this eidetic memory and ADHD. Here's what I think happened: Henry probably noticed Shawn's stellar memory at a young age, realized he has a gift, spoke with his wife about her eidetic memory, learned that you need to challenge your child's eidetic memory at a young age or it'll go away, started the hat game to make it fun and exciting, but then Shawn's ADHD appeared. Suddenly, it made him much harder to raise (because let's be real, Shawn was not an easy child.) Henry didn't know what he was doing anymore, and since it was the 80's, he didn't have the resources to properly understand his kid's behavior, so he tried to find a common interest, and started training Shawn to be a detective "because kids love cop shows." But Shawn struggled to stay attached to one single interest, and when he grew up, he stopped trying to articulate his problems because his mom (the only person who remotely understood his struggles) left, and he blamed his dad for it.

And academics? Those are a joke because what is the point of studying if he already remembers everything? Until, of course, he needs to apply it to a problem-solving test or writing an essay. Suddenly, he's memorizing a math teacher's answer sheet and copying Gus's report.

Yes, Shawn could have been a great cop. He could be an amazing scientist or anything really. He could have been a national spelling bee champion like Gus wanted to be. Even 15 years later, Shawn remembered exactly what word Gus messed up, how to spell the word, and what letter he made Gus slip up, but he didn't want to be on that stage with Gus because that requires so much learning. And so much time. And so much memorizing. And he refuses to sit still for that long when he knows that overloading his head is going to give him migraines.

Also his "I've heard it both ways" probably comes from the fact that people with eidetic memory can still make lots of mistakes if they don't actively commit something to memory. If Shawn only overhears something, he'll still naturally try to fill in the gaps like everyone else, but because he's so confident in his memory, he just believes what he remembers to be true, leading him to repeat incorrect information with confidence. That could also be why some of his references are incorrect due to mixed-up homophones.

Anyway, this post was supposed to be about how Shawn is just a walking movie reference because his memory won't let him forget quotes, but then I fell into a rabbit hole of the negative effects of having an eidetic memory as a child, and I am very passionate about how Henry actually tried his best, and people need to stop calling him a horrible parent. Love y'all. Let me know what you think.

#i just care a lot about the real-life consequences of having an eidetic memory combined with ADHD #psych #psych tv #psych usa #shawn spencer #henry spencer #burton guster #eidetic memory #long post

[v-o-i-d-e-d]

May we have a oneshot based on this scene (https://youtube.com/watch?v=BgVJDd5vHfw&feature=share) for Spockxreader?

Omg, I love this scene! Of, course I will do it! I altered some parts just a little bit but the gist is the same. I hope you like it!

Title: Hello Sweetie

Pairing: Spock x fem!reader, implied platonic Jim Kirk x reader, and platonic Bones x reader

Warnings: canon violence, it's implied that Jim meddled for matchmaking purposes, nothing else I think

Word Count: 2924

She really shouldn’t have been here. Pure lunacy had gotten her here in the first place. Doctor (Y/N) (L/N) was never meant for this type of fieldwork and she was willing to bet that her own lack of skill was a huge reason why she was in this particularly dangerous situation. She was stood in the middle of a very ornate room – a sort of banquet hall she surmised – with her hands cuffed in front of her. Her elegant dress was singed at the hem and her hair had fallen out of its elegant updo. She looked around and noticed there were a total of three other people in the room all of whom wore heavy robes with hoods to obscure most of their faces: the alien guard beside her the one behind her and the one standing by the door they just came in through.

            “You know when I get invited to parties, normally there’s food,” She said to the guard who stood closely to her right. He did not acknowledge her at all and his large, bug-like eyes stayed focused on the door at the other end of the room. (Y/N) rolled her eyes, “So much for small talk.”

            As she shifted her weight from foot to foot with impatience she couldn’t help but place partial blame on the genius who thought this plan up in the first place. Captain James T. Kirk. Just a day earlier he had cornered (Y/N) in her office and asked her to take part in a simple recognizance mission.

“I’m telling you this is an easy mission and it will go off without a hitch! You’re in, you’re out, you’re done,” Kirk pleaded as he followed her out into the main area of the medbay. He had just explained how it would be perfect for her because she was sociable and friendly. Of course, he couldn’t help but add in the added benefit of her good looks. “People will be spilling their guts to you! All you gotta do is bat those eyelashes.”

“Captain, this is harassment. I told you: missions like that are not in my job training.” (Y/N) turned to face Kirk and used her hand to apply emphasis to her statement. “I. Am. Not. Going. End of story.”

The door opened after what felt like hours but what was only a few minutes. (Y/N) watched as an alien that looked similar to the guard but larger walked confidently into the room accompanied by a few other guards. The big alien was dressed in fine clothes and had an elaborate and heavy-looking headdress on, signaling to (Y/N) that it would be good for her health to not piss him off. She stayed silent until the alien stood so close to her that she could smell him. He smelled of rotten meat and expensive oils.

“You are Doctor (Y/N) (L/N) of the starship Enterprise.” He said. “I have reason to believe you are a cohort of Commander Spock.”

This took (Y/N) by surprise. Her brows furrowed and her lips tugged into a frown. Sure she had worked with Spock plenty of times but surely not enough to be considered a cohort, or associated with him by name.

“I think there’s been some sort of mistake here. I don’t even know Commander Spock that well!”

“Spock suggested you specifically for the mission.”

(Y/N) paused and dropped her hand down to her side. Kirk could very well be lying just to get her to agree but then why else would he want a surgeon doing a spy’s job.

“No, he didn’t. You just want me to give in,” She huffed and gathered some old patient files that needed to be sorted and brushed passed Kirk and into her office. She couldn’t deny the rush of warmth spreading across her face but she could do her best at hiding it.

“I’m serious! He said you were beautiful and that you would be disarming enough to get people to talk to you about anything,” Kirk once again followed (Y/N) into her office but this time stopped to lean on the door frame. He crossed his arms and smirked as he watched the doctor deadpan at him.

“Commander Spock said that? Those exact words?” She didn’t believe Spock even knew how to actually compliment people, even behind their backs.

The alien huffed and one of his henchmen stepped forward. He was very scrawny and his large eyes darted wildly around the room.

“We have reliable intel that you are close to the Enterprise’s second-in-command and we would like you to divulge his whereabouts. We know that he has been trying to infiltrate our databases and that is a crime that can not go unpunished,” his voice was harsh, like a steaming tea kettle and (Y/N) winced.

“Well, I’m sorry but your intel is wrong. I wouldn’t even classify us as friends. Well, I mean it’s not that I don’t want to be his friend. I actually like him a lot but he spends just about every moment with me in silence or critiquing me so-“

“Enough! Quit your useless rambling and tell us where he is!” The boss alien thundered out so loud that the floor seemed to shake. (Y/N) was officially freaked out.

“Look, I’m telling you, I have no idea where he is! I don’t even know if he’s on this planet!” She pleaded with the aliens and hoped they believed her because it was the truth. She hadn’t seen Spock for a while, even before Kirk made her go on this mission.

“Yeah, he didn’t say those exact words but that’s definitely what he meant to say. I could tell.”

“Kirk, get out of my office.”

Kirk sighed and walked up to the desk, “Just please do this mission. We are so close to our goal we just need a little push. (Y/N)-

            “Doctor (L/N).”

            “(Y/N). Please.”

If there’s one thing that (Y/N) can’t resist, it’s James being sincere. It just happens so rarely that she caves right away. After a moment of glaring into Kirk’s pleading eyes, she rubbed her eyes and sighed, “Fine!”

            “Yes!” Kirk pumped his fist in victory.

            “But I want to talk to Spock first.”

Kirk paused and side-glanced before looking back at (Y/N), “You can’t.”

            “Why not?”

            “Cause he’s on the mission.”

            “I thought you said he asked for me. How could he have told you that if he’s on mission already?” (Y/N) raised an accusatory eyebrow, she was sure she caught Kirk in his lie but he was quick.

            “Because he just left this morning. Now find your hottest dress and meet me in the transport room for your briefing,” Kirk tapped the desk before quickly exiting the room.

            “Wait, Now?!”

(Y/N) could honestly say she had not thought of how to get out of a situation like this. All attention was on her – something that she would normally thrive with – but she was at a loss for words for the first time in her life. The big alien grumbled and leaned forward to look closer at her face. She didn’t hide her fear.

            “Look, I swear on my life I don’t know what Spock is doing or where he is,” She couldn’t hide the tremble in her voice but she tried to be as firm as possible.

            “Humans,” the alien spat, “They lie so blithely.”

            “I’m not lying!”

            “How can you claim to like someone but know nothing about them? You are lying!”

(Y/N) huffed and rolled her eyes, “Just because I like him does not mean he likes me! The guy does not even think that way! He doesn’t talk to me unless it has something to do with my job!” She had stepped forward during her rant but was immediately seized by the guards that were closest to her. They gripped tightly on her upper arms but the guard on her left quickly loosened his grip and she couldn’t help but think that the sensation was familiar. It reminded her of her first meeting with Commander Spock.

            She was in a hurry to get to the medbay as she had been sent a 9-1-1 message by Bones. In her hurry she had been completely disregarding the safety of other people in the halls, bumping into several people while shouting an apology over her shoulder. It was while she was giving one of these hurried apologies that she managed to bump into a solid form that barely stumbled while she went tripping toward the ground. With a yelp, she braced for the ground but was stopped by a strong hand taking hold of her upper arm.

            “Doctor (L/N), it’s not safe to be running through the halls. The hazard is amplified when one is not paying attention.”

The monotone voice of Commander Spock caused (Y/N) to snap her eyes open and scramble to stand on her own two feet rather than being suspended by her arm.

            “Oh, gosh, I’m so sorry, Commander! You’re totally right, I wasn’t paying attention-“

            “Apology accepted, Doctor,” Spock interrupted her rambling and then walked passed her without waiting for a response. (Y/N) huffed and frowned as she too walked away from the scene of the social crime.

            “Well, isn’t he a sweetie,” She grumbled before picking up her pace through the halls, this time paying attention to where she was going.

            From then on, “sweetie” was (Y/N)’s nickname for Spock. She was careful to never say it to his face since she had worked with him a lot more since the “incident” but in private and amongst friends, the sarcastic endearment rolled easily off the tongue. It got to the point where she even used it with the Captain.

            “Why do you call him that, it’s weird,” Kirk questioned one day over drinks in the lounge.

            “Because every time I talk to him, he’s an asshole. I think it’s funny.”

Kirk laughed and sipped his whiskey. “Well, I think you might have a crush on our favorite Vulcan.”

            “Oh, I definitely do,” (Y/N) was very direct. Kirk choked on his drink in surprise and coughed as (Y/N) continued, “But that’s out of the equation because I don’t even think Spock thinks about anyone unless they’re useful for something he needs doing.”

            (Y/N) downed the last of her drink and shook her head to try to rid herself of the floaty state the alcohol put her in. In the morning, she would regret letting James Kirk in on her best-kept secret but she was not worried about that or anything else except for going to bed.

            “Well, speak of the devil,” Kirk said with a smirk. Spock walked in with his hands clasped behind his back and his usual blank expression. Upon noticing the state of his friend and his colleague he resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

            “Oh, hello, sweetie!” (Y/N) laughed at her own words and Kirk couldn’t help but laugh as well. Spock was stunned into silence. He let his hands drop to his sides and his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He didn’t know exactly how to respond, she had never called him anything other than his name and rank before. He decided to ignore the sudden endearment.

            “Captain, you’re needed on the bridge,” He managed to finally say what he needed to say before quickly turning and leaving the room.

            When Kirk took the liberty of retelling the story to (Y/N) the next morning, she was mortified.

            The large alien hisses to one of his henchmen in a language (Y/N) doesn’t understand and then another one of them steps forward. In a tone that seemed to be unsure of the words he was saying, he started,

            “Our studies show that typically when one human likes another, the feeling is reciprocated,”

            “Spock is not human,” (Y/N) couldn’t help but laugh before correcting herself, “Well, not all human.”

            “Then you have no reason to protect him.”

            “That’s not how feelings even work! Not human ones! I admire him and I will protect him but I do not expect any such action from him. Just as I don't expect a sunset to admire me back or for the stars to gaze back at me! Feelings are not about reciprocity!”

            “This does not align with our intel,” The big alien was clearly angry, and (Y/N) had a strong feeling that things would not go well from here but as she said she would do her best to protect Spock.

            “Regardless of your intel,” (Y/N) scoffed, “Commander Spock has much more important things to do than worry about me or what I’m doing so. I’m of no use to you. Let me go.”

            Why did she never know when to shut up?

The large alien’s face stretched into what (Y/N) had to assume was his version of a grin but looked more like he was preparing to eat her. She wouldn’t doubt it if she was being honest.

            “If you are of no use for giving information, you can be put to other uses, Doctor.”

            “What? Wait!”

The guard to her right started to lead her back toward the door they came through and (Y/N) began to struggle.

            “Take her to the nursery, the larvae must be fed,” The big alien ordered with a loud cracking laugh. Just as (Y/N) yanked harshly away from the guard pulling her, the guard to her left took firm hold of her arm once more but instead of leading her forward, he tugged her back into him. Suddenly, he pulled a phaser and shot the other guard. Crying out in fear, (Y/N) struggled once more to get away from this rogue guard as the henchmen began to make their way over to stop him. The guard removed his hood and revealed his face.

            “Commander!” (Y/N) gasped and her cheeks reddened. Everyone paused for a brief moment of shock before the big alien roared for his henchmen and guards to seize the two star fleet officers. Spock shot a few more before looking down at (Y/N) with an almost unnoticeable smirk.

            “Hello, Sweetie,” He said before moving his grip from (Y/N)’s arm to her hand and pulling her to a run. (Y/N)’s face was warm and it was not because of the running. She couldn’t help but laugh as they ran through the corridors, dodging phasers and guards. “We have to get to the front entrance. That’s the only place Scotty can beam us up!” Spock shouted over his shoulder.

            “Right!”

They ran until they reached the front room. Standing in the middle of the room was not the best option but they were only there for a moment before they both felt the familiar feeling of being beamed up to the transport room. Upon their arrival, Spock immediately ushered (Y/N) toward the awaiting Doctor Bones.

            “I’m fine! Just a few cuts and bruises. Nothing I haven’t had before,” (Y/N) tried to wave the grouchy Doctor away but he swatted her hands away and then removed the cuffs.

            “I’ll be the judge of that, cupcake. You look like you caught on fire.” He was gesturing to the hem of her dress.

            “I think for a moment I did,” (Y/N) laughed while Bones shook his head.

            “All right, you’re free to go. You too, Spock.”

Bones finally released the two, though he had told Spock that he could leave about twenty minutes ago. The Vulcan had refused. Spock and (Y/N) walked side by side in silence for a while before Spock broke it.

            “You have misread me.”

(Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows and looked up at her Commander who was still looking straight ahead. “What do you mean, Commander?”

            “My feelings about you. You have misread them.”

Her eyes widened. In the chaos of escape, she had forgotten that Spock was standing right next to her when she basically saying she loved him. Okay, slight exaggeration but she still felt embarrassed.

            “Oh.” That was all she said. All she could say. Another time of silence passed.

            “I apologize if my actions suggested that I do not enjoy your company,” Spock was deliberate with his words as if he didn’t know if what he was saying was the right thing. The tips of his ears were tinged a faint green when he finally paused in his step to look at (Y/N). She noticed the blush on his ears and couldn’t help the small smile that snuck onto her face.

            “So, you like to hang out with me?”

            “Well, I’ve never accompanied you in a social setting so it would be illogical for me to say that I like something that I have not tried.”

            (Y/N) rolled her eyes.

            “However, I do enjoy working with you. You are very good at your job, Doctor (L/N),” Spock clasped his hands behind his back so that (Y/N) would not see him picking at his cuticles. He was nervous.

            “(Y/N).”

            “Pardon?”

            “Call me (Y/N). Outside of work obviously,” (Y/N) shrugged and looked away from Spock’s intense gaze.

            “(Y/N).” She could’ve melted at the way her name sounded coming from his lips. It was experimental and a bit rigid sounding but it was a start. She finally looked back into Spock’s eyes and smiled brightly.

            “Do you want to go get dinner with me, Spock? I’m starving,” (Y/N) resumed her walk, this time in the direction of the cafeteria. She heard Spock’s steps fall in line with hers.

            “I highly doubt that you are starving. You always attend normal meal times which means you must have eaten this morning,” Spock said in a matter-of-fact tone. (Y/N) laughed and shook her head.

            “It’s an expression, Spock.”

#Spock x reader #AOS Spock #Star Trek #Jim Kirk #Enterprise #xreader #SpockxYou #Doctor who reference #Spock Imagine

[foone]

So if Threshold happens to different Trek crews, who gets who pregnant? Voyager is one of the few shows where it makes heterosexual sense, (for lack of a better word, "sense" not being the word anyone would use to describe threshold)

So for Voyager, it being Paris (pilot) and Janeway (captain) makes sense through that lens. Paris, sure, because he is a pilot. We could pick a Science Guy to do it, but then it might be B'Elanna who does the flying fast, and then who is she going to kidnap for Lizard Sex? Harry? ... Yeah it'd be Harry. Anyway once you've picked Paris, you've got to figure out which woman is funniest to have him abduct into Lizardry. B'Elanna? No, not funny enough. She'd be a Klingon lizard and beat him up instead of mating, even if they did get married later. Besides, what if she evolves into a super-advanced Klingon, not a lizard? *claps* PUT TUVOK ON THE SHUTTLE. Kes? No, they already did a Tom v Neelix episode. Seven of Nine isn't on the show yet, so Janeway it is.

Ok so for other shows, we gotta pick a pilot or science guy (who might be screwing around with transwarp, and thus get Lizarded) and someone they could turn into a lizard to have babies with. The show is assuming heterosexual pairings here, but we know about things so we are not so limited.

The original series: as much as I'd love to say Sulu and Uhura ("I'll save you, fair maiden!" "sorry, neither"), I think TOS was much less of an ensemble than later Treks, so it'd need to be Spock. Spock is doing some science stuff, he gets hyper-evolved, and he picks someone else to hyper-evolve and turn into his lizard bride. As much as I want to say "Kirk", I think it's more likely that he runs off with Uhura and then Kirk has to rescue them. Kirk was always about being the one who rescues people, having the Enterprise come rescue Lizard!Spock (is that antisemitic?) and Lizard!Kirk and it's called commanded by McCoy? Nah.

TNG: the direct analogy to VOY would mean we have Wesley and... Picard? No, no, and no. Sorry. Frankly, we already had this plot on TNG (Genesis), and canonically the answer is Worf and Troi. The problem with it being a pilot thing is that Wesley is a child and Data (the official science guy) is an android, so he can't really be hyper-evolving. We could go with Geordi, the other Science Guy, but then we've got the image of a black man kidnapping a white woman. Uhhhh no. We already did that episode and it is an example of Deep Shame for the show. So Worf and Troi it is.

DS9: so this is what inspired me to make this post. We all agree Sisko would be a damn good father to his lizard babies, but would it be him? If so, with who? You could have it be Dax, and she lizards first and kidnaps him, which makes some sense given that she's a Science Guy. But you also have to consider Weird Guys. Every Trek series needs a Weird Guy so that whenever an ancient alien artifact turns the whole crew into Muppets or whatever, they can be the one who isn't affected and can thus solve it. This is all to say, Odo/Kira could be done. We've had a few episodes where he's been shown to do very extreme things out of his pining for her, so it makes some sense. Odo/Quark would be funnier but given how the DS9 writers handled Profit and Lace, I really don't want to see them do a gay mpreg episode.

ENT: the series with canon mpreg! Direct translation of would be Mayweather/Archer. Mmm. Probably not. I think it's gonna be a rarepair: Trip/Hoshi. Trip/T'Pol is too canon to be funny. The next best option is Archer/T'Pol and that's just kinda bleh. It makes sense but it's just the kind of thing they'd do and it'd be bland. We can do better. Honorary mention: Trip and Reed.

I've not watched enough of the New Treks to have an opinion there. Maybe SNW: Ortegas and La'an. Don't ask why.

#Star Trek #threshold #threshold day

[t0ast-ghost]

So the thing is I wasn’t going to comment on the sixth episode. I just got home from a hella good play and I’m tired so I relax with Star Trek but holy shit

What IS that

With that HELLO and welcome to my first thoughts on the sixth episode (The Enemy Within) of the original Star Trek series

Here we go:

- that is a fucking dog

- IS THAT BLOOD?!? On Star Trek???

- so he got transporter cloned.. WHY IS HIS FACE LIKE THAT THO

- I like the fact it’s told a bit in retrospect, like it starts off with the star date and saying that at the time they didn’t know he got cloned

- MCCOY! His friendliness and then the “I have no sympathy for clumsiness” bro wha

- DONT YELL AT MCCOY

- McCoy not knowing what to do about Jim so he goes to Spock lol

- what the fuck is that fuckin thing, it’s rabid man.

- anytime someone is holding the creature there is literally no reason for them to be holding it. Like Kirk is just holding it and then HANDS IT TO SPOCK.. WHY IS THIS NORMAL NOW

- so do people casually just sit on tables here? First we had McCoy, now Spock. Is it just science/medical officers?

- Vulcan nerve pinch for the win

- POV your boyfriends are deeply concerned for your wellbeing (side note: bones looks so soft in the first pic. He cares so much)

- “you have a point, Spock.” “Yes. Always, doctor” STOP FLIRTING

- “If I seem insensitive to what you are going through, you must understand it’s the way I am.” HE SAYS THIS WITH ALL THE CARE IN THE DAMN WORLD. Spock is the most emotional character I have ever seen

- uh oh the circuits

- nooo Sulu! Do they not have better cold protection?

- YEAH I HOPE YOU’RE IN PAIN FUCKER

- so I think what they’re trying to promote is the idea that there’s the kind and indecisive side and the animalistic “sinful” side that has all the impulses and power to make decisions and together they work so that the former side can calm the latter to be more… civilized?

- “god forbid I have to agree with Spock” they’re married and you cannot convince me otherwise

- was that dog okay? Like it was really fuckin angry at something

- HES DEAD JIM MOMENT! WE HAVE A HES DEAD JIM MOMENT

- “for once I agree with you, doctor” THEY ARE MARRIED

- Spock is so riled up rn (every time he shows emotion I’m commenting on it because I think he is so so emotional but then his whole thing is he isn’t)

- SPOCK YOUR LOGIC ISNT LOGICING (having a human half and Vulcan half I think is a bit different than literally being split into two people, but what do I know)

- they are literally the angel and devil on his shoulder, but married, and also in love with him

- what no no bring Sulu back. That was such a good delivery of lines I am so

- this episode shows the power imbalance between Kirk and Janice and that messaging could be more powerful if they really wanted. Like showing how Janice felt forced to say she was okay with it and wouldn’t tell anyone because it was the captain I feel was a big step to take in the 60s (because it was rarely if ever talked about especially on tv) but it still wasn’t enough and was treated horribly in the end. They brush off her experience and also let Kirk be near her which is not okay. I know they wouldn’t but I wish they’d actually addressed the fact that Kirk can pretty much get away with anything and the crew wouldn’t/couldn’t stop him unless they deem it truly necessary (which would be way to far)

- I think the Kirk stuff could be more impactful

- some of those close ups on Kirk are crazy

- Bones is so damn worried about him in the transporter room

- SPOCK IS STRESSED AND HE HESITATES

- “the imposters back where he belongs, forget him” but isn’t the thing is that he is you? Like he’s still there and apart of you, Kirk

Okay, that’s episode six. I don’t have much more to say about this episode.

Ep 1

All other episodes

#Star Trek #star trek the original series #star trek tos #star trek kirk #tos kirk #captain james kirk #star trek spock #tos spock #spock #star trek mccoy #tos mccoy #leonard bones mccoy #star trek sulu #tos sulu #hikaru sulu #yeoman janice rand #janice rand #television t0ast talks

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Stuck Between a Jock and a Metalhead

Summary: Nancy, on a whim, decides to visit Steve at Scoops Ahoy, which leads to her overhearing confessions from Steve that leads her to think about the decisions she's made. A few days later, she decides to come back. She finds him being hit on by the town freak. What's a girl to do? Oh, get stuck in a freezer with the both of them.

Chapter One - Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Nancy was nervous about hanging out with both Eddie and Steve. There was clearly something between the two of them, and Nancy didn't want to get in the way, but she wanted to be a part of Steve’s life again. She didn't realize how much she had missed him until now. She did want to get to know Eddie, though, like she told him she would. She approached Steve’s house cautiously and knocked on the door, trying not to think about the last time she was here. Steve had cooked her dinner, and Nancy had let him vent about his parents. She remembered them falling into bed afterward, and she remembered how gentle he was. . . She smiled, thinking about how, as always, he liked to hold her hand during the act of making love. For him, it was always making love. She regretted thinking about that before knocking because her face suddenly heated up at the sight of him.

"Hey, Nance, come in. It must be warm out there," Steve said and stepped aside to let her in.

"Yeah, that's it," Nancy said.

"Eddie called earlier to let us know that he'd be late," Steve said. "He kind of sounded like he had just woken up."

"Probably stayed up late, worrying about what we're going to do to him to get him back for the freezer incident," Nancy said with a grin.

"Well, I still have those robes your brother made us wear to that Star Trek convention," Steve said. "We can totally fuck with him."

"Star Wars," she corrected. "I know that you know the difference."

Before she could say anything else, there was a knocking on the door. Nancy and Steve both went to answer it. When they opened the door, Eddie stood there, grinning.

"Oh my god!" Nancy exclaimed.

"Your face is bleeding!" Steve exclaimed.

"Ah, so, funny story," Eddie said as he stepped inside.

Steve sighed, rolled his eyes, and dragged Eddie to the bathroom with Nancy following. He pulled out the first aid kit and started tending to the scratches on his face.

"What happened?" Nancy asked.

"I'm really bad at shaving my face," Eddie replied, and Nancy rolled her eyes. "A little girl's cat was stuck in this hole, and I had to get the poor thing out. Of course, the cat thanked me by giving my face a nice, scratchy hug."

"You're a hazard, you know that," Steve said fondly.

"That's what I was telling you," Eddie said.

"We should wrap him in bubble wrap," Nancy said.

"Yeah, that's what my uncle keeps telling me, and I swear, I think he's going to do it one of these days," Eddie said.

"Then again, we should also wrap you in bubble wrap, Steve," Nancy teased.

"Ha ha," Steve said. "So, what makes you think that I do know the difference between Star Trek and Star Wars, Nancy?"

"Nice segway," Eddie nodded.

"Because one night when you thought that I was still asleep on the couch, you changed the channel to Star Trek where you proceeded to mutter about how Kirk and Spock are totally gay for one another," Nancy said. "Which, by the way, was another clue."

"Yes! You believe in them, too!" Eddie said excitedly.

"Come on, that episode where Spock and Kirk basically rutted against each other in the dirt wasn't fooling anyone. That wasn't fight to the death music, that was fuck to the death music," Steve said.

"Yes!" Eddie clapped gleefully. "Plus, when Spock realized that Kirk was alive and pure joy came shining through. . . Come on!"

"Yes!" Steve exclaimed.

"You're both nerds," Nancy laughed.

"Everyone is a little nerdy about something, Nancy," Steve blushed.

"Well, there was no reason to hide it from me. I like Star Trek, too. Although, not nearly as much as you two," Nancy said with a snort. "And you two are both right."

Once Steve was done, he pulled out another first aid kit. It was much smaller than the other one.

"Carry this with you always," Steve said.

"Aww, it's a little baby first aid kit," Eddie said. "Thanks, man. I shall name you. . . Nigel? Yes, Princess Nigel."

"Princess Nigel?" Nancy laughed.

"A boy can be a princess, isn't that right, Stevie?" Eddie cooed at him.

"Shut up," Steve said, biting his lip and blushing.

Suddenly, they all heard the sound of the front door opening and the loud clattering of heels.

"Steven?" A female's voice called out.

"Your mother?" Nancy asked with wide eyes. "I didn't know your mother was coming back into town."

"Shit, I didn't either," Steve cursed.

"I don't hear your father," Nancy muttered with wide eyes.

"Steven!" Margaret Harrington yelled.

Steve sighed and stepped out of the bathroom to greet his mother. Nancy and Eddie followed tentatively.

"I'm here, mother. This is a pleasant surprise. I thought you wouldn't be back until next week," Steve said stiffly.

"Oh, well, the conference ended early. Your father had to take a later flight," Margaret said, and her eyes lit up when she spotted Nancy. "Oh, Nancy. It's so lovely to see you again. It's wonderful to see you two back together."

"You get younger and younger every time I see you, Mrs. Harrington," Nancy said gritting her teeth.

The truth was far from it. She was made of so much plastic that it was hard to tell what her features used to look like. She used to look like Steve. Nancy knew how much Steve hated what his mother had done to herself, which was why he only used products that accentuated what was already there. She knew why Margaret did it. She did it to keep her husband around for as long as possible. It honestly just made her look scary.

"Oh, such a lovely girl," Margaret said and pinched her cheeks. "You could teach my son a thing or two. Lord knows he needs it."

"Mother, Nancy, and I aren't together. We're just friends," Steve said.

"Oh, well, that's a shame," Margaret said in disappointment, and her eyes dimmed further when she caught sight of Eddie. "And who is this?"

"This is Eddie Munson. He's my - " but he was cut off before he could finish.

"We've talked about this, Steven," she snapped. "We've accepted that you're. . .different, but we've asked you not to bring your. . .boys around here. I don't have to tell your father about this, do I?"

"No!" Steve exclaimed, his face red. "Of course not, mother. We'll get out of your hair and let you get some rest."

"You're a sweet boy, Steven," Margaret said and patted his cheek. "I should warn you that when your father does come home, he's going to want to talk to you about you coming to work for him again."

"I told him that I don't want to do that. I told you guys what I want - " Steve said.

"And we told you that you could do so much better. Why waste your talents when you have potential elsewhere?" She asked.

"It wasn't wasted potential when Grandpa Otis had his own salon," Steve said.

"Well, your grandpa was. . . different," she sighed.

"Like me, you mean?" Steve scoffed. "Well, that's certainly something that I didn't know about Grandpa."

"I don't like this attitude, Steven. Do I have to tell your father?" Margaret asked.

"I'm sorry, Mother. It won't happen again. We were just leaving," Steve said.

"And please cut your hair, dear! You're starting to look like a girl!" His mother yelled out.

He gave his mother kisses on the cheek before dragging Nancy and Eddie out of the house. He had grabbed his keys on their way out. Once they were outside, Steve sucked in some air and exhaled heavily.

"Steve - ," Nancy started to say.

"So, where do you guys want to hang out?" Steve asked overly cheerful with his hands on his hips.

"Quarry. This time of day. It's gorgeous," Eddie said. "We'll pick up some food. Come on, Nancy, let's cheer up our boy."

Nancy certainly liked the way he said "our boy," and judging by Steve’s real smile, he liked it too. When they got to the quarry, they sat near the water with van doors propped open as they ate. Once they finished, they all stared at the water in silence for a while.

"So, was that the monster you guys were talking about? Because holy fuck was she scary," Eddie blurted out.

Nancy and Steve stared at him. Steve burst into laughter.

"That was my mother. She's great, isn't she?" Steve asked, scoffing. "You think she's bad, you haven't met my father."

"What were you telling her that you wanted to do?" Nancy asked.

"Promise me that you guys won't laugh?" Steve asked.

"Promise," they said in unison.

"I want to go to Cosmetology school and become a like a barber or something," Steve said.

"That's not funny at all. That's great, man," Eddie said.

"That's something you'd be really good at Steve," Nancy said.

"Either that or become a basketball coach," Steve said.

"You can always do both," Eddie pointed out.

"That's true," Steve grinned.

"What about you, Nancy?" Eddie asked. "What are your career aspirations?"

"Investigative Reporter, I want to help people find the truth," Nancy said.

"That's a worthy goal," Eddie said.

"If I only I can get past these misogynistic assholes at the Post. I have an internship their and they think that the only thing that I'm good for is answering the phone and making sandwiches," Nancy rolled her eyes.

"Decided to fight for the job, huh?" Steve asked.

"Yes, I think it's worth fighting for," Nancy said, gazing at him.

"You know, Wheeler, you handle their food. You can do whatever you want to it," Eddie suggested, grinning wickedly at her.

Nancy giggled and bit her lip. She threw her empty wrapper at him.

"Maybe you could," she said. "What about you? What do you want to becoome?"

"I don't know. I used to have dreams of becoming a rockstar but I kind of fucked that up," Eddie shrugged. "I'm stuck here in this town so I don't think it matters whether I figure it out or not."

"That's not true. You still have time to figure it out," Nancy said. "Not everyone knows exactly what they want out of life. Despite the fact that I seem to have a problem with learning it, it's alright not to have all the answers."

"But knowing that, you're never going to stop searching for them all, are you?" Eddie asked.

"Probably not," Nancy said with a grin.

"You'll find your calling, I'm sure of it," Steve said, and then he paused. "Maybe my mother is right. Maybe I should cut my hair. Do you think I should?"

"No!" Eddie and Nancy said.

"Your mother is never right," Nancy scoffed.

Eddie and Nancy reached forward at the same time to stroke the end of his hair. Steve sighed and closed his eyes, leaning into their touch.

"Do you want to cut your hair?" Nancy asked.

"No," Steve said.

"Then don't," Eddie said.

"What do you think she meant when she said my grandpa was different?" Steve asked. "Do you think he could have been like me and Eddie?"

"I don't know. Is there a way to find out. Maybe look through his stuff?" Eddie asked.

"They keep all his stuff locked up in his old salon," Steve said.

"This sounds a lot like someone could use her sleuthing skills to good use," Nancy said.

"And this sounds very much like a quest," Eddie said.

"You guys want to look through my grandfather's things with me?" Steve asked.

"If that's okay with you," Nancy said.

"Yeah, okay, sounds fun," Steve said. "I'm working all week, but Saturday is when I'm off next."

"Great, it's a date," Eddie grinned.

With Eddie and Nancy's hands still in his hair, the three off watched the sun start to begin its descent. They talked about the future well until the sun fell and the stars twinkled down upon them.

Chapter Four

#stranger things #nancy wheeler #steve harrington #nancy wheeler x steve harrington #stancy #eddie munson #nancy wheeler x eddie munson #edancy #eddie munson x steve harrington #steddie #nancy wheeler x steve harrington x eddie munson #stedancy #nessie #bisexual eddie munson #bisexual steve harrington #pansexual nancy wheeler #pan4bi4bi #lesbian robin #robin & steve #platonic stobin #platonic ronance #platonic reddie #stranger things fanfiction

[unknownfacelessfanfictions]

Living Sanctuary

Hemmer x fem!reader (can be read as romantic, however is more platonic with developing feelings) Words: 2.3K Summary: She never really learned anything about his home. Until one day she did Inspired by this post from @nichestartrekkie0-0 (If fanfics not your thing, just ignore this :)) so please chek out their art it's AMAZING

A drop of sweat ran down her forehead, down her temple, down her cheek and was wiped aside by her sleeve before it could fall to the floor.

Her arms felt heavy, but she didn't dare move them for fear that the objects in them would fall to the ground and shatter. Something she could not afford, after all, Hemmer needed these things. At least she was certain there was no harm in them.

The cooling system was offline and no matter how hard the engineers tried, it wasn't getting any better. In the end, it had turned out to be a fault in the system, which could be rectified by a simple reboot.

The problem: this reboot took several hours.

Hours in which the Enterprise had become uncomfortably warm, at least by her standards. She knew from Spock that he enjoyed the temperature and Uhura also had few problems with the change.

However, apart from the fact that everyone felt temperatures differently, she knew that there was one person who would not like it at all: Hemmer.

Based on what she had heard from some of the junior engineers, Hemmer was in an even worse mood than usual, and the temperature was so bad that M'Benga had sent him to his quarters to rest for fear that the Aenar would suffer heat exhaustion. Something that would be even more fatal for Hemmer's species than for her own. M'Benga had eventually interrupted her, lying panting on the sofa, and asked her to check on the Aenar. After all, they both knew how incredibly stubborn their friend could be.

She had agreed without hesitation. Hemmer might have his rough edges, some of them deadly sharp, but he had a heart of gold and she cared for him deeply.

He was a good friend on whom she had always been able to rely, so she would not let him down now. Even if he was still unaware of his luck.

With her elbow, she managed to press the button next to his door, alerting him that someone wanted to come in. For a few moments she stood in the corridor, people walking past her and looking at her strangely, wondering if he was even there. Perhaps he had thrown caution to the wind and gone back to work?

She immediately shook her head and dismissed the idea. Hemmer might be stubborn from time to time and not listen to advice, and when he did he did so reluctantly, but he was not self-destructive.

If Doctor M'Benga told him that the work posed a risk to his health, he would follow the doctor's instructions, grumpily, but he would do it.

Hemmer didn't give her much time to think about it. The doors opened and she quickly entered to avoid standing around stupidly in the corridor any longer. Inside it was only slightly less stiflingly hot than outside, but it wasn't any hotter either, which she saw as a plus.

She looked around searchingly, but couldn't spot the engineer. "Hemmer?" Carefully setting the items down on the sofa, she decided to take off her uniform jacket.

The top underneath would have to do, otherwise she would suffer from heat exhaustion. "Are you all right? Where are you?"

There was silence for a while and she began to wonder whether the door had opened by chance and he was actually somewhere else, but at that moment Hemmer's muffled voice rang out. "I'm fine."

She wheeled round to the bathroom where his voice had come from and only now did she realise the faint sound of falling water. Of course, she silently scolded herself. When the air was too hot, water was an excellent way to cool off.

With long strides, she walked to the door and stopped so that the opening sensor could not detect her. "May I come in?"

A grunt sounded and she frowned worriedly when an approving grumble came from Hemmer.

"M'Benga asked me to come round," she explained as she stepped into the bathroom. "Besides, I was worried about you, I mean, I'm almost dying in these temperatures, I can hardly imagine that it's pleasant for-" As soon as her gaze fell on Hemmer, she faltered and stopped, stunned by the sight before her.

Hemmer seemed to have noticed, as she fell silence surprised and huffed.

"I know I know, I look like a drowned beaver, or whatever you humans call it. But it's the only way to survive this heat."

She broke out of her stupor long enough to lift the corners of her mouth in slight amusement. "It's 'you look like a drowned rat'. And, that's not what caught me by surprise."

Even if this was of course partly to blame for her sudden hesitation, after all she had never seen her friend in such a position before. He sat on the floor of the shower, clever idea the tiles were also cold, and let the cool water run down his body. Consequently, his hair clung to his face in lengthy strands, while his antennae swayed in a dance-like manner, evading the droplets in a game known only to them. But as already mentioned, it wasn't that which had left her speechless.

It was the sight of Hemmer clad in nothing more than shorts, snugly embracing his well-defined muscles, stretching just halfway up his thighs, which intensified her warmth.

This alone would have been enough to induce a blush, but something else caught her off guard. The tattoos.

Dark blue, almost black, tattoos meandered in wavy patterns across his physique, from his chest to his shoulders to his arms, down to his legs and, she surmised, down to his back. They reminded her somewhat of the traditional tattoos of the Maori or the Polynesians, indigenous peoples of Earth, but at the same time they looked completely different, like two worlds at opposite ends of the galaxy.

Hemmer cleared his throat, apparently waiting for an answer, and she squatted down in front of him to be at eye level with him. It may not have done him much good, but she felt more comfortable not having to stare down at him. "Don't take offence, but I didn't expect to find my best friend naked in his shower."

"I'm not naked," he grumbled and she grinned slightly as he tugged at his trousers like a grumpy child. "Besides, I didn't realise you had tattoos." His antennae went up for a moment before returning to their dance and Hemmer frowned. "No? I thought you knew." She laughed softly as she watched drops of water drip down his cheekbones. "How was I supposed to know? It's not like you're regularly parading around half-naked in front of me."

"Do I hear disappointment?" His voice and his grin were provocative, teasing and elicited a laugh from her. "Definitely not." Still, she couldn't ignore the tingling in her stomach, even if she tried her best.

They were silent for a few moments before Hemmer sighed and gestured for her to come closer. "I can feel the heat radiating off you. What's the point of you falling over on me here?" He did his best to sound disinterested, but she knew him well enough to know that he was genuinely worried about her.

She hesitated for a moment, but decided that modesty really wasn't appropriate at this point, and kicked off her trousers and socks so that she was squatting in front of him in her top and panties. No problem, she thought to herself and shifted her weight onto her knees.

She crawled over to him and let out a low cry of shock as the cold water hit her heated skin. It felt like tiny needles were piercing her skin and she pulled back, however Hemmer didn't seem to let that happen.

He grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her towards him with such force that she bounced against him and only prevented him from headbutting her by resting her hands on his chest. Not that she would have done anything to him.

She would have been the one with the concussion.

The cold water beat down on her mercilessly. She squealed and wriggled on Hemmer's lap, only realising later that she had landed there, but he didn't allow her to escape.

"You're burning up," he murmured and pulled her a little closer to him so that her hot skin was pressed against his pleasantly cool skin. "So stop squirming or I'll tie you up."

"Kinky," she murmured as her body seemed to slowly acclimatise to the difference in temperature. "Keep it down," came the reply and she grinned softly, slowly relaxing. The water felt good.

Gradually, she felt the feeling of stifling warmth disappear and her glowing skin lowered to temperatures that seemed more bearable, judging by the fact that Hemmer was now relaxing beneath her as well, even leaning into her touch.

"Aren't I too warm for you?" He just shook his head before leaning it against the tiled wall behind him, a slight smile on his face. "It's acceptable. Besides, I know my skin is cool enough to give you relief." She snorted at his posturing, but made no move to free herself from her place on his lap.

"Actually, I came to help you with that." He chuckled softly. It was a sound that came from deep in his chest, where she was still resting her hands, deep and real, and she felt warmth spreading through her again, but this time a different kind of warmth.

"I'm used to getting used to this kind of heat. Have you ever been to California? It was just as bad." She nodded, giving in to exhaustion after a while and leaning her head against his shoulder. "You are indeed nice and cool."

Her hands wandered from his chest to his arms when something struck her and made her lift her head. "Wait, are your tattoos prominent?"

Her fingers danced over the patterns of his tattoos, eliciting a shudder from him that she didn't realise, and sure enough, she could tell that the tattoos weren't just ink poked under the skin, but actually stood out with slight bulges.

They were barely noticeable unless you were sitting half-naked on top of each other, though she guessed it was a lot easier for the heightened senses of the Aenar to detect.

"It would be strange any other way," Hemmer returned with amusement, placing a hand on hers and running it along his collarbone. "Considering we Aenar are blind." Heat rose to her face. She had actually forgotten for a moment that Hemmer himself was blind.

" They're beautiful," she murmured softly, fascinated as she continued to run her fingers tentatively over the patterns of his skin. "You are beautiful." Hemmer left it uncommented, but closed his eyes and his antennae followed her movements.

"Do they mean anything?" He nodded slightly and guided her hand to his upper right arm, where a ring wrapped around his bicep. "Every male Aenar gets a tattoo like this when he comes of age. It's a symbol that we're old enough to serve our people and contribute."

Next, he went to some lines that snaked down his neck to his shoulder blades. To reach them, she had to lean so close to him that his hot breath brushed her face. "These lines symbolise my connection to my family. Can you feel the corners where they end?" She breathed in agreement. "Each of those corners represents a member of my family." There were five in total.

Next, their hands travelled together to his thighs. "These tattoos symbolise the balance of our society, our harmony with nature. The Aenar must live in tune with their environment and learn to live with it to prevent the deadly cold from overtaking them. They humble us, in a good way, and remind us of our place in this world, this universe."

Finally, Hemmer brought her hand to his chest, where the lines formed an intricate pattern that she could not describe in words. "These represent my devotion to healing, to repairing. They are not mandatory among the Aenar, but this pattern represents our pacifist representations. They visualise my duty, my morals, my life."

He did not guide her hand further, but did not release it, so that her hands, covered by his, rested on his chest. Her gaze fell on his left forearm, which was the only part of his body, with the exception of his face, that was completely free.

"And what about here? Is there a reason why there are no tattoos here? Or is it some kind of cultural ban on having them there?" Hemmer shook his head, chuckling softly, and carefully clasped his hands with hers, causing her breath to hitch.

"It's not a cultural taboo to have tattoos there, quite the opposite. The tattoos there represent the family you have established. After the wedding, a band of blue colour is applied below the elbow, decorated with small ornaments. For each child born from this marriage, another band is added."

Fascinated, she looked at his arm and, releasing her left hand from his, ran it over his skin, where a marriage bond would probably be visible in the future. "And what if you get divorced? Are these tattoos reversible?"

 "No." Hemmer took her hand in his again and traced invisible patterns on the back of her hand. "However, divorces are very, very rare for us. We choose our partners with great care, nothing less than perfect comes into question."

She slowly raised her eyes and released her hands to continue tracing the patterns on his skin. "So, has anyone caught your eye yet?"

A hint of a smile appeared on his lips and he carefully lifted his hand to brush a wet strand of hair that was stuck to her face behind her ear, where it remained against her cheek.  "Maybe."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

@bigblissandlove1

@akamitrani

@moonlightshaiku

@indignantlemur

#star trek #star trek strange enw worlds #star trek snw #star trek x reader #hemmer x reader #hemmer x you #chief hemmer x reader #hemmer snw #hemmer #chief hemmer #lieutenant hemmer

[bagog]

Star Trek: Discovery Narrative Highlights

So I really like Discovery, but differently than I like other Star Treks. My love for Voyager, for instance, is based off the sense of found-family in the face of sci-fi shenanigans. I could pick out favorite episodes, but my favorite episodes don't necessarily represent the epitome of what I love about the show, y'know?

It's different with Disco. There are concrete moments from through out the show that made me go "Okay, I like this, I want this. More of this." Here's some of them! This is indulgent and all from memory

Season 1 - Klingons Speak Klingon

In a story about Klingons fearing the Federation as an institution which will irrevocably alter their culture, the Klingons actually speak Klingon. Love it. Season 1 - Gabriel Lorca

I loved seeing a Star Fleet captain who seemed to have ascended because of his skill at war: a trait which ordinarily would not elevate one within Starfleet service, per se. It made him interesting. Your mileage may vary on where this went, but. He's still a big appeal on rewatch.

Season 2 - Queer People Helping Queer People

The introduction of Jet Reno is one of my favorite hallmarks in the show. I love Jet, and I love the way she serves as a foil to every other character. But best of all, I loved the scene when she is talking to Hugh Culber about how distant he's been from his husband (since coming back from the dead, so, you know) and helps him by relating her own story about her wife, who is now passed. To say I'm happy to see queer stories on Star Trek is a massive understatement, but this was the moment it locked in for me. In the world of the Federation, there's no difference between being queer or straight and anyone could've talked Hugh out of his funk. But in our world, it's usually queer people helping queer people make sense of their experiences. Recognizing the importance of that distinction and going with the queers-helping-queers take is a really big deal for me.

Season 2 - Amanda

This is hands-down the best representation of Amanda we've ever been given and she is so wonderfully human and warm that it helps you understand Spock and Michael so much better. I don't know what to say other than that, I love her.

Season 3 - The Future

I love that they went not just into the future, but further into the future than any mainline trek lore has gone. Hell yes. I'm bummed it's kinda a post-Utopian mess, but I get storywise why that's the case. I love the future starships, I love the future technology, I like that we just "BZP" to wherever we want to be in the ship now. In a show increasingly steeped in centuries of canon lore, it's smart and challenging to try to do "a millennium in the future."

Season 3 - Queer Family

Queer Family! Queer Family in Star Trek! This is my queers-helping-queers point but dialed up to 11. Love it, would do anything for it.

Season 4 - Artificial Intelligence

The ship is alive and she's named herself. This comes to a head in an episode in Season 4 where Paul Stamets feels very hesitant about this, after the plot of Season 2 was trying to stop AI from destroying the galaxy. There's this whole Measure of a Man but Not Quite Because Its the B Story thing going on, but at the end of it, there's a twist. Paul eventually learns to accept his new crewmate, but then he asks the person in-charge of the inquest "What would you have done if I said I wasn't comfortable serving with an AI?" and the dude goes "I would've assigned you to another ship. This was never about whether she has a soul or whatever, it's about if you can learn to accept that with you 22nd century brain." And that's.... that's great.

Season 4 - Mental Health

Mental Health is a thread running through some of Discovery (Season 2 flirts with Spock's neurodivergence, for instance) but never more than in Season 4. Hugh Culber, the ship's ray of sunshine and de facto counselor, is in bad shape, mentally, and he needs help. But the best moment is when the away-team is beset by chemical memories of panic and basically rendered useless with fear... except for Detmer, who helps them all get through it. When asked why she was unaffected, she says "Oh I totally was affected, but after my grievous injury during the war, I went to therapy for the PTSD and learned some coping strategies" AND THAT'S WHAT SAVES THE GALAXY.

Anyway, this is very indulgent and probably nobody reads this, but thanks if you did.

#star trek #star trek discovery #disco #Jet reno #Michael Burnham #Hugh Culber #Paul Stamets #keyla detmer #i will probably delete this

[emonydeborah]

snw episodes rated by Una

in which Una is my unit of measurement, not that this is what she would think of the events

All from memory bc who has time

SPOILERS FOR EVERYTHING

1x01: she’s literally the catalyst for getting Chris off his butt and the whole episode. Barely in it but she did all the detective work for everybody. “Somehow I knew you would” with the little smile and “La’an!” in the softest voice immediately established both relationships and my abiding love for her. She’s literally driving the plot but still not there much; 6/10.

1x02: she shares some LooksTM with Chris. Chris was slightly subdued at one (1) dinner party and Una went something is deeply wrong. Chris is sad and Una tells him to live his gosh darn life. Pretty sure she flies the ship a bit. She’s here. Can’t complain. 6/10.

1x03: OOOOHOHO here we go. Whatever camera angle it is that shoots from the floor to watch people walk away and makes them look tall was excellently utilized. Girl was STRIDING everywhere. Hauled a grown man over her shoulder and was greeted with the shock and awe she deserved. Told her biggest secret (!!!!) to help the crew!!! bc she would sacrifice herself for them!!!!! also she googled her glowworm episode like it had not happened her whole life (which I will accept as a writer thing. but she really looked at a picture of someone glowing bc of an infection and went 😮). Girlie managed a whole ship of sedated/crazy people and did not let anyone jump into the sun/warp core. Had a deep talk with La’an and revealed more of their shared history. Stunning. 10/10.

1x04 another case of I can’t complain. As my favorite character I want her to be happy, but I will take some internal bleeding and other catastrophic injuries. As a treat. The sheer power of ordering the medical staff to give away her blood transfusion and then knocking herself out before they could argue. Unparalleled. Had no impact on the main plot but what she did do in her sphere of influence was important and exemplary. I’ll take it. 7/10.

1x05: back at it again with the b-plot but I AM HERE FOR IT. GIVE ME LA’AN AND UNA BEING GOOFY. Loved the death glare at Joseph so he would confess and how she pretended not to be huffy about her nickname. La’an went can we… play a game… and Una went YEs sounds educational. For science. The look of absolute shock and betrayal when La’an shot her and her little “ow.” “People are idiots. You’re fun.” La’an went lol my childhood was a bleak horror scape and Una went absolutely NOT I’m going to commit crimes to rectify this. I like people having wacky misadventures while the plot is plotting somewhere. 8/10.

1x06 Chris forgot her name. She had to leave so she wouldn’t verbally tear him to shreds in front of his crew. Most likely explanation. Where was she I miss her. 4/10.

1x07: she locked the pirates out of the ship!!! We love a competent first officer shooting people on her bridge. She shook her head half an inch and Spock went absolutely whatever you say. Chris was thrown to the floor in front of her and she crossed her arms and watched him get up. “We’re starting a mutiny.” "Someone's breaking the rules today." Legitimately appreciated her teamwork with Chris in planting the mutiny idea. Would love to see it again sometime. 7/10.

1x08: bow and arrow. She checked on Joseph after and I appreciated that they carried that through from her finding out about Rukiya before. Una was here but she wasn't Una. Also. If we're real she wasn't really there. I liked the eye shadow though. 5/10.

1x09: "you should really try the omelet." The breakfast scene is my favorite and in fact the only scene. Nothing else happened with Hemmer or Spock or anyone. Really short episode. I would have liked to have seen her face when Chris snapped the tongs. She tried to follow the shuttle to the surface with scans and Chris went nah babe we're fine. Let her do her job Chris. Breakfast scene 10/10. Episode 5/10.

1x10: notable by her absence. She checked on Chris and once again told him to live his life. She's not there in the future but I won't take points for that because Chris immediately went where is my bestie. I cannot function without my work wife where is she. Her arrest kick-started the series and for our cliffhanger she was arrested again. I'm sensing a theme. What will they incarcerate her for next and how will Chris break her out this time. I will always appreciate Chris going absolutely feral for his first officer/life partner. 9/10.

2x01: prison. She tells Chris not to be stupid and he goes don't tell me what to do *cough* I love you *cough* Not a strong start for our girl but I trust her to overcome. Once again Chris is going off on a mission to save her. Lost points for the brevity of her appearance and the weird black jumpsuit. 4/10.

2x02: Girl sat in a chair and watched her friends say nice things about her for days. I would shrivel up and die. Una looks teary. Her lawyer put some heat on a guy who said he would NEVER hire Una if he knew her real race and Una said that was too mean leave him alone. La'an confessed her feelings in public. Spock gave the whole courtroom a heart attack to make Una smile. Chris hugged her looking panicky. please don't go away again. Una looked at Chris like she wanted to kiss him or perhaps sip one milkshake through two straws. The whole episode is about how great she is. 15/10.

2x03: unfortunately for most of this episode she did not exist. Liked the professional and sassy attitude towards Pelia but I must reduce points for Una not existing. 2/10.

2x04: Una succumbed to a disease she should canonically be immune to. Fridged almost immediately. Chris said I need some good fighters and took his doctor instead of his super strong first officer who was familiar with the terrain. Una called Chris out on relationship nonsense like the og she is but this cannot repair the damage. Drove me to writing fix-it fic. -10/10.

2x05: Una is canonically one of the girls. She hangs out with some very specific junior officers including her emotionally constipated son and her traumatized daughter. She laughs very loudly and I like to think the writers are purposefully making her more open now that people know her genetics secret. Tells Mr. Spock how to be a Vulcan. Part of a lineup to talk to Spock and is a head taller than the rest of the line. All in all a great time. 9/10.

2x06: she yells at her former professor who is also thousands of years old. I would simply perish. "yoU HaVe CruMBs oN yOuR uNifOrM" Starfleet said we need someone to get this defunct and thus far unmanageable station up and running. Send Una. "Oh good, I was afraid I'd miss the speech." Rebecca Romijn note- she is nine inches taller than Carol Kane, but she manages to look/act a lot younger and smaller than normal. Pelia takes about 14 seconds to get Una teary eyed. "My final paper was METICULOUSLY researched." 8/10.

2x07: "That's ridiculous, we can't just 'Not Look.'" "Like... a p i n - u p p o s t e r?" Girl is constantly baffled the whole time. One (1) young man was unnerved by her and she went he knows how I die. She then winked at him and he almost had a stroke. We see a picture of her as she is idolized in the future. Excellent. Different flavor than 2x06 but still 8/10.

2x08: lots of Significant Eye Contact with Chris. She said if you don't get this ship where it's going asap I will revoke your command and drive us there myself. "Everyone is on their own journey." I feel like she knows Joseph murdered a man in sickbay but we don't know for sure. She's out here being a competent first officer and telling the captain how the crew is feeling. I like the reminder of her priorities. Chris is here to explore and it's Una's job to make sure he has a functional crew to do so. 6/10.

2x09: Una Chin-Riley, musical theater nerd, had the absolute time of her life and I am so happy for her. Girl JUMPED into that first song with much soulful pushing of buttons. "A surprisingly beautiful baritone." Chris asked Uhura the singer how musicals work and Una answered. Is feeling her feelings so much these days she started singing about her job. Waltzed through the halls with James T Kirk. La'an went I would like to not do this please and Una said feel your feelings. Fly away with me. Accept yourself. Love yourself. "You came in here hot. On fire. It's making me sweat." The whole ship is singing and La'an is making friends. This was the best day of Una's life. 1000/10.

2x10: Una volunteered for a dangerous forbidden mission to save her husband's gf and spent the whole time stalking around the bridge like a tiger or a mom looking for sales at Target and giving hopeful speeches. She did tell Spock his gf might be dead but if you want to look for her go for it champ. "ORDERS CAPTAIN" Chris is hanging on by a thread. Una is the thread. Not a great end if I'm honest but she did look fantastic walking around murderously. 5/10.

#snw #snw spoilers #una chin riley #this took me days #there was a lot to consider #strange new worlds #pikeuna #do these rating match my opinions of the episodes? not necessarily #but do they directly correlate to my mood while watching them? #yes #and yes that’s the second time I’ve linked that same fic #I have strong feelings

[your-name-is-jim]

The Star Trek TOS comics experience is seeing some interesting ideas (sometimes well-written too!) while having to tolerate the occasional het romance for Kirk that never works out. To be fair, it's not THAT common in the series I read (thank goodness), and I get that it's pretty canon typical when Kirk is young, but a lot of comics take place in the movies era, and just... how the hell do you watch The Final Frontier of all movies and think "ah, yes, James T. Kirk and his heterosexual conquests"? Like, I'm pretty sure that the only "action" Kirk gets with a woman in TFF is when the naked dancer jumps on him to fight, and all he does is desperately trying to stop her LOL And in The Motion Picture? The movie doesn't even acknowledge that the woman who dies in the transporter had a past relationship with Kirk, and it doesn't really make explicit that Deltan women make men accidentally horny, so there's nothing there either... But hey, let's give Kirk another random woman in this comic! Someone who's going to leave and never show up again! (-.-)

It's either casual relationships that were never going anywhere from the start, or serious relationships like trying to develop Carol Marcus, but we all know how it's going to end: she doesn't belong to Starfleet, and he is lost without a ship, so it's just "aw we like each other but we can't stay together :("... And I'm just *points at Spock* LOOK! Someone on the Enterprise! That Kirk likes very much! A genius scientist too! He's right there!

Okay, this is mostly a personal vent and I'm not really trying to start a discourse, just feeling a little frustrated lol But I guess it's also really a good reminder that Kirk/Spock is The OTP for a reason ❤️ (And I'll have to write by myself the stories I want to read LOL)

[the-redhead-in-a-dress]

So apparently making PikeUna lists is kind of my thing now...

Missing PikeUna or Pike & Una scenes I really wanted to see in SNW:

(Some of which I think have been really well covered in fanfics already)

Talking about La'an! Pike and Una are close, but she'd never mentioned La'an before she boarded the Enterprise, there's no way Pike doesn't beg Una for all of the gossip, or at least tips on how to approach and befriend this new Security Officer.

Honest conversation about Pike leaving Enterprise & Una following Discovery. After having spent much of that career together, that potentially could have been hurtful, especially as Chris didn't want to ever come back, and contemplated not doing so even when hearing she was missing. And even if it didn't hurt her, I think they need to talk about Pike's head space now he's back (even leaving the whole Boreth and the future thing aside). Make this either take place in sickbay (Una's leg was broken!) or after she's released, but I think having it in sickbay and MBenga being vaguely around, getting to see the two of them and their friendship for the first time would be good.

Talking about Una's revelation that she's Illyrian - We got a cute scene where Pike vehemently rejects her resignation and that heartbreaking moment at the end when Una questions whether Pike would have acted differently if she hadn't saved the ship. YET they don't talk about it!!!!!! That's a big deal, a massive secret that she's hid from him from decades. Chris must have so many questions, his head must he swirling. Una is anxious Chris only likes her still because she saved people. There are some big feelings that need sorting out, I can see them both being anxious about bringing it up, but there should have been a scene where they finally talk about it at some point in season 1. Maybe whilst doing the washing up one night it just comes flooding out.

Pike going to see Una after she almost died and had to be stitched up - A mix of fear that she almost died & anger that she could be so stupid & not seek medical attention earlier. I'd have liked to have this scene either take place in sickbay, or Una coming to the Captain's quarters (without approval to leave sickbay) still hurt but knowing that Pike needs somebody given that members of their crew died. A scene, to show their vulnerability with one another and that they have each other's backs.

Una and Pike trading stories after Spock Amok - Preferably a late night drinking scene, or she swings by for a late night snack in his kitchen. They're both in pajamas eating Brie and drinking wine, leaning against the counter. Pike bumping her arm that got shot with the phaser and Una wincing. She ends up revealing that she and La'an participated in Enterprise Bingo. Pike says he's proud of her and La'an for having some fun.

A fun scene between Neera, Una and Pike just after the trial- Something lighthearted to juxtapose the tension of the courtroom. Neera raises an eyerbow at Una 'seriously this guy?!! Have you seen his hair?!" Pike blushes, Una rolls her eyes. Pike is sheepish when he realises that after forcing Neera to travel across the galaxy to defend Una that he doesn't have anyway to return her to Illyria (it's not like the admirals are gonna let The Enterprise take a detour to that Non Federation colony right now). Neera commenting that unlike Una, his dimples don't work on her when he tries to apologize. Neera shakes her head and says she's already got a lift.

Una's return after the trial, Pike recounting all that she missed - Explaining all the stuff he did (abandon Enterprise against Star Fleet's orders, commandeer a spacecraft, go to Illyria, almost asphyxiate, find Una's old friend and the best civil rights lawyer and haul her ass to Earth...all to save his friend and keep Una in Star Fleet. Una yelling at him that he's so stupid to have risked his entire career, everything he'd ever worked for, for just her. Chris telling her quite frankly he can't do this without her, that he wasn't just going to abandon a friend he's had for decades. If they hadn't talked about her being Illyrian already this scene would be even more important. ALL the feelings need to come out here. It's raw, it's vulnerable, they're both crying, there's another hug.

Pike explaining the Illyrians' origin secrets that Spock and he found out (see The Illyrian Enigma comic) - I know he promised the Illyrians he wouldn't reveal it, but I figure Una is fair game, it is her heritage after all. Now that Pike has interacted with more Illyrians, and now know's a major historical secret, this would be an opportunity for Una to share some of her more personal experiences as an Illyrian (maybe). Now that she doesn't have to hide. Una is shocked that Pike reveals there may be other Illyrians in Star Fleet, he asks her what she wants to do. Una tells him she just wants to go back and do her job...but there's tension as she's torn between being selfish (focusing on protecting herself and her career) and helping others out there.

Debrief after Subspace Rhapsody - There's no way Una does not tease Chris mercilessly for lying to his girlfriend and being outed about it in song IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE bridge. On a serious note, I think Chris would also want to talk about Una's song 'Keeping Secrets' and what that meant. I think he'd be hurt by the lyrics of her song, that she always felt alone when he was right by her side through their careers. They'd have to have a tough conversation about the fact that Una had to hide, and she felt she had to to protect him, but also the joy now that she doesn't have to anymore. Something to talk about how things have changed now, and that she's figuring who she is now she doesn't have to hide.

Drinks after Boimler and Mariner go back to the future - Oh what a day. Like I know the episode ends with all the Enterprise crew drinking in Pike's quarters. But like, it would be cute to have a scene with Una giving Pike a birthday present and them talking about how they're actually feeling given events of the day. Like Una has to work through feelings that she's suddenly a Star Fleet pinup in the future even though right now a lot of people in the Fleet hate her. She'll joke about them being ahead of the times in celebrating a holiday (his birthday) 200 years before its cool and Chris would look sad. They'll talk about his future, but also what he wants his legacy to be.

I have more but this is already super super long....

#star trek strange new worlds #star trek snw #st snw #PikeUna #Missing Moments #chris pike/number one #una chin riley #christopher Pike #pikeone

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 2

Propaganda Under Cut

Mel Medarda

she is the richest woman in piltover who left her family because she didn't agree with the way they did things (conquering and murdering). she sponsors jayce and viktor, and courts jayce, which makes people upset because, you know, jayvik. she and viktor are CANONICALLY parallels with much of their imagery mirroring the other's and they are literally the same height. and people are so weird and misogynist and racist about her. they argue she is manipulating jayce and doesn't actually love him. i am cognitively disabled and cannot explain things well, but, she is so fucking shouldered

Black woman who has a romantic arc with one of the main characters Jayce. Jayce has a best friend called Viktor and their relationship is pretty important plot wise, shown as a direct contrast to his relationship with Mel even though only one is canonically sexual/romantic. So naturally fandom as the transformative safe haven it is villainized Mel horribly coming up with theories about how instead of being a complex morally grey character she's actually evil and just wants to seduce Jayce for Evil Reasons. Since they couldn't use her as a supportive female friend with no personality, others just ignored her existence entirely or acted like Jayce would ditch her for Viktor. Majority of m/m shippers will reduce her down to her relationship with Jayce and an obstacle in the way of JayVik, ironically writing her as a far worse and less complex version of the character we get on screen. The misogyny reeks and combined with the racism? It's a pretty bad case. Only slightly mitigated due to the fact that the main characters of the show are women (and the lead is a lesbian) so thankfully the male focus of fandom is lessened as opposed to filling almost every inch. Still awful to try and search for good Mel content, godspeed girlies with taste.

She's one of the most interesting characters on the show, a rich politician, smart and beautiful and has a really complicated and intriguing relationship with the city's golden boy inventor. unfortunately golden boy has a sickly twink science partner so she gets sidetracked SO BAD

Nyota Uhura

She's Spock's canon partner in AOS, and I get it because they're not a great couple, but she gets villianized in fic so much. They constantly make her an asshole (which totally has nothing to do with her being black /sarcasm) and abusive just for the crime of dating a man headcanoned as gay. And I mean, I think Spock is gay and her being a love interest was unnecessary but still! She's cool!

Oh my god so in the Star Trek reboot she’s Spock’s girlfriend and the fandom has no idea what to do with her??? Like she is ALWAYS either such a bitch or like the mom friend? And there is so much more to her character than that? But they always break down her character AND find a quick and easy way to break up her and Spock. I’m not even mad at that but at least treat their relationship with some weight instead of just being like ‘it never mattered’. People can love multiple people throughout the course of their lives. You know that right? Just because you loved someone before doesn’t make your new love any less special. And even headcanoning Spock as gay… you realize he doesn’t need to be attracted to Uhura for their relationship to have mattered, right? Even if he confused friendship for romantic attraction, him feeling such strong friendship and openly expressing it is so monumental for him!!! 

she's dating Spock, who people ship with Kirk, so fans have decided that it's horrible writing and "really, they're just defending her, the movies turned her into just a love interests," which is not at all true. The movies do so much more for her to the point that the fans who have only seen the movies think that the main characters are Kirk, Spock, and Uhura instead of the Kirk, Spock, McCoy of the original series. Also having a black women being shown as being desired and loved in mainstream media, particularly by one of the most popular characters of all time, is a good thing, not making her "just a love interest"

#poll #round 2 #arcane #mel arcane #mel medarda #star trek #nyota uhura

[mybullshitsensesaretingling]

A Vulcan Smile Part Seven

[Part One] [Part Two] [Part Three] [Part Four] [Part Five] [Part Six]

Jim looked up from his computer as the door to his ready room swished open. He had stolen away to the ship to get some much-needed quiet to review his notes before his next meeting. A quiet he was surprised to see emanating from his best friend as he made his way across the room. 

Leonard typically preferred to make his presence in a room known, entering with a joke or a complaint or some kind of combination of the two. Now he took a seat across from Jim in complete silence. The captain looked him over, trying to identify where this change was coming from. He wore crumpled shirt and an unreadable expression.

"Is that the same uniform as yesterday?" Jim finally asked. 

"Didn't have time to change."

"You've been off duty for twelve hours, Bones. How long does it take? You wear the same thing everyday," Jim pointed out.

"I was helping Joanna with her homework and then," Leonard's voice dropped slightly, "I was with (Y/N)."

Jim’s brows raised. "Were you?"

"Apologizing," Leonard clarified. 

"And what did you do that required you to apologize all night long?" Jim's words tiptoed around innuendo. 

"Joanna was suspended for starting a fight."

"So you were apologizing for your part in bringing another angry McCoy into the universe," Jim guessed. 

"I didn't react well to the news," Leonard admitted. "Started a fight of my own." 

"That doesn't sound like you," Jim said sarcastically. 

“I blamed her. Told her that Joanna was picking up violant tendencies from her,” Leonard explained. 

Jim let out a disappointed breath. He didn’t know you well, but he had heard so much about you through long winded, sporadic rants from Leonard that he could guess how well that went over. He certainly knew enough about people in general to know that wasn’t something you said to someone who cared gor your child. 

“She blamed me. Told me Joanna was acting out because she’s hurt that I left and doesn’t know how to express it.” Leonard slumped back in the chair. “Apparently I don’t put in enough effort as a father.” 

“Well,” Jim started pointedly. He raised his brows and tilted his head, hoping if he made a strong enough facial expression he wouldn’t have to finish the thought out loud.

“When were you planning to tell me you though I was a bad father?” 

Jim let out a breathy chuckle at his friends dramatics. “I don’t think you’re a bad father. I think that (Y/N) spends a lot of time with Joanna and if she thinks she’s feeling a little abandoned then she might know what she’s talking about.” 

Leonard sighed. “I know.”

“What are you going to do about it?” 

“I already apologized.” 

This earned Leonard a look that told him he needed to do better than that.  

“I suppose I don’t really have a choice.” 

“Not if you ever want to be able to respect yourself again.” 

Leonard groaned and rubbed a hand across his face. “I’m not cut out for this.” 

“You said the same thing the first time you had to work on a ship. Now look at you.” 

“Now look at me,” Leonard repeated in a defeated tone.

“You know-” Jim waited until his friend was looking at him again to finish, “Centaurus isn’t that far out of our way.” 

“Oh no.” Leonard shook his head and held up a hand. “This ship is on red alert every other thursday. My eleven year old isn’t going to be involved in that.” 

“We’d be taking a similar course to the shuttle. Any dangers we run into they’d probably run into too. Wouldn’t you prefer she run into them with you?” 

“I’d rather she not be in space at all, but seeing as I wasn’t given a choice in that…” Leonard trailed of, thinking it over. “You wouldn’t mind the detour?” 

“Not at all.” 

“You know letting my daughter and Spock’s sister loose on this ship might lead to more chaos than we’re prepared for.” 

Jim shook his head. “Spock’s gonna hate this.” 

“You don’t have to convice me, Jim. I’m alread on board.” 

-

“Tell me again,” Leonard ordered as he walked with Joanna to the Enterprise. 

“The warp core, jefferies tubes, and bridge are off limits. If red lights start flashing I am to stay in my room. If I hear the word ‘anomoly’ over the comms, I am to find you in the sickbay. If I see more than five people in uniform running in the halls I am to find Ms. Grayson and wait for the all clear. No wandering the halls or entering the recreation deck or holodeck alone. No fun of any kind,” Joanna rattled off. 

“Good. Stick to those rules and you should make it back home in one piece.” 

“Can’t I have a little fun?” 

“Being a passenger on the Enterprise is-” 

“Not a reward for punching my classmate even if he is a shithead and desereved it,” she parroted the words he’d used when he explained the arrangement to her. “I’ve gotten like two lectures a day since I was suspended, thrown up on during a shuttle ride here, and given four times the calc homework I would normally have. Haven’t I been punished enough?” 

“We’re not punishing you. We’re making sure you’ve learned your lesson. We don’t want you to turn into a violent drop out with no direction in life and a long arrest record.” 

“You’re say ‘we’ a lot about you and Ms. Grayson,” she pointed out. 

“Oh look! Lieutenant Uhura.” Leonard quickly changed the subject, coming to a stop outside the air lock where the Lieutenant was standing. “Waiting for Spock?” 

“He’s just saying goodbye.” She nodded over to where he stood with you and Serek. 

“Good might be a stretch,” Leonard mumbled. 

“Who are they talking to?” Joanna asked. 

“The Vulcan ambassador,” Nyota answered. 

“They don’t seem to like him.” 

“It’s a complicated relationship,” she said, watching the three of you hold up Vulcan salutes. 

As the ambassador turned and boarded another ship, you folded down you pinky and ring finger and lifted your raised fingers to your temple. Your head jerked to the side as you pretended to shoot yourself in the head. To Leonard's suprise, Spock used his hand to wipe your imaginary blood from the side of his face. 

The two of you walked in silence to meet the others. You both had your hands clasped behind your back, but as you got closer yours moved to swing at your side. 

Uhura watched the way Leonard smiled and then stiffened awkwardly as you approached.

“Come on let’s get out of here before Spock and I are used as a visual aid in another debate about the future of the Vulcan race,” you said when you reach them. “If I get called V’tosh ka’tur one more time, I’m going to start throwing things.” 

“That kind of behavior is exactly why they call you V’tosh ka’tur,” Spock pointing out.

“Don’t call your sister a Vulcan without logic, Spock,” Uhura chastised. 

“Thank you. Wanting to throw things at those stuffy, xenophobic elders is completely logical,” you argued. “And besides they call you V’tosh ka’tur too.” 

Spock mouth dropped open. “I am not V’tosh ka’tur. I follow the ancestral teachings.” 

“But you stink like a human.” 

“You are using nasal supresants. You don’t know what I smell like.” 

Leonard leaned forward and took a wiff. “No, she’s right. Just like a human.” 

You smiled at the doctor. “This is going to be a fun little trip.” 

Joanna grinned. Spock’s jaw tightened.

#bones imagines #bones x reader #bones imagine #leonard mccoy imagine #leonard mccoy x reader #leonard mccoy imagines #star trek imagines #star trek imagine #spock imagine #spock imagines

[t0ast-ghost]

I will not shut up about Star Trek TOS yet and you’ve decided to listen in on that. So welcome to my thoughts on the 11th episode (The Corbomite Maneuver):

- starting off strong with these camera angles and movements

- *sees a spinning colourful cube in space* just go a bit to the left (he is not up for shenanigans today)

- can’t wait for Checkov to be introduced, I hear he gets a gun or smt

- WHAT IS THAT PHYSICAL CHECK??? Why does he have to lie on his back?? And why does he have to have his shirt off?

- if I were Spock trying to call the captain and he picks up and all I’d see was his tits… all I’m saying is he keeps a really good straight face

- OMG we got a “what am I a moon shuttle conductor or a doctor?”

- Sulu laughing at Spock’s sense of humour

- the close up on Kirk’s ass as he leaves the room is so intentional

- Bones sitting on the railing…

- how many surfaces can I sit on competition but my opponent is Leonard Bones McCoy

- just to prove my point the next scene starts with him sitting on a table

- god I feel bad for Scotty having to sit between McCoy and Spock in some of those meetings

- Sulu was cool as a cucumber

- “do you ever tire of questioning me on things you’ve already made your mind up about?” “it gives me emotional security” they are each others emotional support guy (Spock & Kirk)

- Kirk saying“navigation, you’re timing was lousy. Same with engineering, Helmsman” then Bones immediately after “you’re timing was lousy”

- how can you sit in a chair like that even (bones)

- Alexa play tik tok by Kesha

- (okay now I’m just imagining Spock dancing like one of those spider-man memes but completely straight faced (also Spock now listens to Kesha canonically but like in my head))

- THE FUCK IS THAT FUCKING THING??? THAT IS A PUPPET!

- Bones is so caring, he has so much fucking compassion I won’t shut up about him

- “you now have seven minutes left” but there’s 23 minutes left in the episode. Guess a lot of it’s just gonna be dead air… er space I mean (yeah I can come up with a better line than this later (edit: no I can’t I’m tired))

- SPOCK IS SO SAD. He truly thinks this is a hopeless situation.

- Bones is about to die in four minutes and he’s threatening Kirk because of the fact that he put Bailey’s health at risk… I love this man

- “Anytime you can bluff me, doctor” I can’t legally say what I thought was said but maybe the ancient archaeologists will know from context clues

- I don’t think Uhura has spoken to most of the bridge crew up to this point, she barely has had plot or even dialogue, I can’t wait till they give her an episode or just even make her more central

- Spock going to Kirk’s side after the bluff for emotional support

- Spock is so proud when talking about his mom :)))

- Your science and medical officers usually shouldn’t stand so close to your chair and clutch at it while leaning over you. It’s not normal behaviour.

- Okay I’d like to mention how calm Sulu has been and how much I love him, can we please get more of him in future episodes?

- wait so Bones is just gonna let Bailey go back to work? Like I get they apologized to each other but that doesn’t change that it’s still a bad idea to have him there

- Spock, Kirk, and McCoy immediately after the death threat is gone: guess it’s time to start flirting again

[Video description: Spock stands on the bridge, he says, “A very interesting game, this poker.” Kirk sitting in his captains chair replies, “It does have advantages over chess.” McCoy smiling at Spock adds, “Love to teach it to you.” Spock smiles back at him. End description]

- he’s got a twinkle in his eye

- The shake on the bridge as the tractor beam tows them is so funny if you watch Spock and McCoy (it continues to be funny for the next couple minutes)

- "Captain request to-" "Denied. If it's a trap.. If I'm wrong, I want you here" awwe he wants him safe (idc that this is not what the writers are trying to say, HE WANTS SPOCK SAFE)

- they all have to bend over on the transporter pad but when they get transported Bones isn't even bent he's just standing at his normal height slightly hunched

- HOLY CRAP I HATE THAT THING... I'm so glad it's a puppet

- nope okay I don't know what's happening, I can't. I'm. What.

- that is apple cider, they are sitting around this guy trying to drink apple cider

- McCoy doesn't know what the fuck to do right now and neither do I

Now imagine, if you will, Spock dancing

Thank you, and have a good day.

Master post of past/future episodes

#a very shitty video description #Star Trek #star trek the original series #star trek tos #star trek kirk #tos kirk #captain james kirk #star trek spock #tos spock #spock #star trek mccoy #star trek bones #tos mccoy #tos bones #leonard bones mccoy #it’s so difficult to tag that mf #star trek sulu #tos sulu #hikaru sulu #star trek uhura #tos uhura #nyota uhura #star trek scotty #tos scotty #montgomery scott #t0ast television talks

[electronickingdomfox]

TOS season 3: subtext becomes text (part 2)

Continuation from this other post: https://www.tumblr.com/electronickingdomfox/705554052352770048/tos-season-3-subtext-becomes-text-part-1

Plato’s Stepchildren

This episode is kinky, in general, though I don’t think there’s much K/S in it. It contains, however, the first appearance of Shakepeare’s homoerotic sonnets in relation to Kirk. He’s forced to recite Sonnet LVII while crawling on the floor towards the Platonian lord: Parmen.

The sonnet in question deals with the poet’s “slavery” under the love demands of a younger man. This is the full text (Kirk only recites up to fourth line, before being interrupted by McCoy):

Being your slave, what should I do but tend Upon the hours and times of your desire? I have no precious time at all to spend, Nor services to do, till you require. Nor dare I chide the world-without-end hour Whilst I, my sovereign, watch the clock for you. Nor think the bitterness of absence sour When you have bid your servant once adieu; Nor dare I question with my jealous thought Where you may be, or your affairs suppose, But like a sad slave, stay and think of nought, Save, where you are how happy you make those. So true a fool is love that in your will Though you do anything, he thinks no ill.

The sonnet was probably chosen because of its relation to slavery. But it’s an interesting choice nonetheless...

Wink of an Eye

Yet another episode in which Kirk is forced into a relationship with a woman, or isn’t really able to consent. I read somewhere that Fred Freiberger, producer of season 3 in place of Roddenberry, wanted more romance in the series. Though I can’t locate the exact source, so take it with a grain of salt. But anyway, there’s indeed quite a lot of love stories here, for several characters: Chekov (Spectre of the Gun), McCoy ( For the World Is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky), Scotty (The Lights of Zetar) and even a brief scene for Spock in The Cloud Minders (I’m not counting episodes in which Spock was just acting, or not being truly himself). For some of these characters, it’d be the first time they have a genuine romance in the series.

Did this mean more female love interests for Kirk as well? You know, since he’s supposed to be “space Casanova” according to some fans? Well, not really. There’s Rayna, of course. But season 1 alone had both Ruth and Edith. What happened instead was a dramatic increase of episodes in which Kirk is forced, or otherwise manipulated, into a relationship with a woman. So far, we’ve seen a marriage while under amnesia in The Paradise Syndrome, a forced kiss in Plato’s Stepchildren, and now a kidnapping in this episode. And we’re not even done yet: there’s still the love potion of Elaan of Troyius, Marta’s assault in Whom Gods Destroy, and a semi-forced situation in The Mark of Gideon.  To compare, there were only two episodes in the previous seasons, all together, in which I’d classify the “romance” as forced: Dagger of the Mind and A Private Little War.

What it’s interesting in this episode, in terms of Kirk/Spock, is the following scene:

Queen Deela links Kirk’s interest in Spock with “affection”. Affection, of course, can be just friendly affection... But this is not what she’s thinking about. For starters, she wants a demonstration of such affection, and it’s not friendship what she’s looking for. Deela’s interest in Kirk is explicitly sexual in nature (she needs him to beget children). And then there’s, of course, her lover Rael’s jealous reaction.

Moreover, this isn’t the last time a telepathic being reads into Kirk or Spock’s minds, and finds love in there. Because after this episode comes...

The Empath

A really lovely, heartwarming scene, in an otherwise dark episode filled with torture. Spock is looking at Kirk, while he rests after being tormented by their alien captors.

This attracts immediately the attention of Gem, the empathic woman who can sense other people’s feelings, and she turns towards Spock. 

Finding himself under surveillance, Spock quickly averts his eyes, but Gem approaches him and touches his shoulder, to better feel his emotions. And whatever she feels, it must be something really beautiful, since she makes this expression (coupled with sweet music in the background):

Gem can’t talk, but her face says it all. There’s also no dialogue in this scene, and yet it’s everything in the script. Could be friendship or loyalty what she’s sensing there? Could be... But Gem has been around Kirk, Spock and McCoy for a while at this point. Those kind of feelings shouldn’t surprise her anymore. Moreover, McCoy is right there, and he’s about to sacrifice himself for his friends. Yet she doesn’t turn towards McCoy. She must have sensed something new in Spock, a feeling she probably didn’t know till now. And I think it’s love.

Whom Gods Destroy

The second appearance of Shakepeare’s homoerotic sonnets, though this time, its relation with Kirk is weaker.

It’s actually Marta who starts reciting sonnet XVIII, till the fourth line. This is the full text:

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate: Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, And summer’s lease hath all too short a date; Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, And often is his gold complexion dimm'd; And every fair from fair sometime declines, By chance or nature’s changing course untrimm'd; But thy eternal summer shall not fade, Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st; Nor shall death brag thou wander’st in his shade, When in eternal lines to time thou grow’st: So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

She’s interrupted, but then turns to Kirk and asks him how he liked it:

Yeah, she knows you’re into this stuff, Kirk. Deela knew, Gem knew, and now Marta knows too. These guys are so obvious... They’re not fooling the ladies.

Requiem for Methuselah

And speaking of obvious, this episode is as subtle as a brick through a window (“como un elefante en una cacharrería”, as I’d say in my own language).

First there’s Kirk falling in love at first sight with an android woman, who talks about sciency stuff just like Spock, and also has problems dealing with her emotions (for another example of parallels between Spock and an android struggling with emotions, see Star Trek: The Motion Picture).

And of course, there’s the final scene:

MCCOY: Well, I guess that's all. I can tell Jim later or you can. Considering his opponent's longevity, truly an eternal triangle. You wouldn't understand that, would you, Spock? You see, I feel sorrier for you than I do for him because you'll never know the things that love can drive a man to. The ecstasies, the miseries, the broken rules, the desperate chances, the glorious failures, the glorious victories. All of these things you'll never know simply because the word love isn't written into your book. Goodnight, Spock. SPOCK: Goodnight, Doctor. MCCOY: I do wish he could forget her.

McCoy accuses Spock of being unable to feel love (specifically romantic love, since that’s what Kirk felt for Rayna). What does Spock do once McCoy leaves? 

Exactly. He mind-melds with a sleeping Kirk and makes him forget Rayna (coupled with romantic music in the background). Now, if it wasn’t for McCoy’s speech, we could assume that Spock was just trying to help his Captain, even if using some unorthodox methods. But McCoy’s speech changes everything. He just told the viewer that Spock is unable to feel something like romantic love. Those were harsh words. And now Spock proves to the viewer that McCoy is wrong, that he can, indeed, feel love.

Again, it’s all in the script. It’s so obvious, that even people you wouldn’t usually link with K/S shipping seem to have got it. For example, this is what Marcy Lafferty (married to Shatner from 1973 to 1996) said about it in an interview (Shatner: where no man..., 1979) :

Turnabout Intruder

The final episode of TOS, and written by Roddenberry himself. Since it was the final episode (and probably everyone knew it at the time), it should have some grand plot, right? Something really glorious, and heroic, and epic. Maybe the Enterprise finally defeats the Klingons and Romulans, and achieves inter-planetary peace or something. Actually, the production team called this episode......... Captain Kirk: Space Queen.

Fuck yeah. Of course, the plot revolves around Kirk switching bodies with a crazed ex-girlfriend, who then proceeds to take hold of the Enterprise. But I wonder if, at some level, it was really about Shatner playing a woman inside a man’s body, or instead, playing a flamboyantly gay Kirk right under our noses. Specially since, while filming this episode, he changed a line out of nowhere to say “Spock, it’s always been you. Please say you love me too”. Was this finale a way for Roddenberry to give the middle-finger to the network that killed his show? Hard to know, and pure speculation on my part. But fun speculation nonetheless.

At the story level, there’s the scene where Kirk, inside Janice’s body, says that Spock is closer to the Captain than ANYBODY ELSE IN THE ENTIRE FREAKING UNIVERSE. And then Spock mind-melds with him. He didn’t make any mind-link with Kirk in previous seasons, but this is the fourth episode in which he melds with him in season 3. He got kind of an addiction to it. There’s also the moment where Spock leads Kirk, taking him by the wrist.

The effect of all this is kind of mitigated by the fact that Kirk occupies a female body at the moment. So even if, for story purposes, is a rather gay scene, the 60′s viewer is still seeing an actor having a tender moment with an actress (which would be nothing new).

But there’s the other side, as well:

Yeah, it’s actually Janice but, from the audience point of view, what we’re seeing here is the Captain Kirk that we got used to for 79 episodes. Getting all lovey-dovey with a man (unfortunately not Spock), and seducing him to kill for his sake. Also, the guy doesn’t seem to mind much that Janice has turned into this hunk of a man. He’s only concerned because of the murderous plan. Now think, was it really necessary to make Janice’s accomplice her lover as well? She already had a love interest in Kirk, and in the episode’s beginning, she was complaining about how lonely she felt.

Well, that’s all I have to say about this subject for TOS season 3 (which was a lot). If you’ve made it through all this text, thank you very much. And I’d be glad to hear your opinions.

#star trek #star trek tos #meta #tos season 3 #k/s #kirk/spock #spirk

[muirmarie]

[tw: suicidal thoughts, terminal illness, mentions of vomiting]

somehow 3400 words of accidental story???? may edit/rewrite a little and throw up on ao3 idk, but it stands as-is. vaguely mcspirk.

________

my father was a betting man

________

for the world is hollow and i have touched the sky where starfleet sends a cmo replacement before they go to yonada, and mccoy - mccoy goes back home. where else is he going to go? kirk and spock are throwing him away, aren't they - he'd asked jim to let him stay, but instead he'd - well. it doesn't matter.

he goes home. he goes home to joanna. she's sixteen years old. younger than he was when his father -

he goes home to joanna, and he counts out his months, and he makes a plan for how he's going to put the period on his life, because he's not going to put her through what he went through. he's not going to let her watch him die. he's not going to beg her -

well, it doesn't matter, does it.

he looks in the mirror in the mornings, and he sees his father's face, and he looks at her blue eyes and he wonders if he was ever that young. wonders -

he doesn't reply to any messages from kirk and spock, but he keeps in sporadic contact with uhura and scotty. he doesn't ask them not to pass anything along - he won't do that to them - so he just doesn't tell them anything true. never asks them anything real.

it's just, he thinks. he killed his father, after all. it's just and it's fitting that he goes out like this. but he won't let joanna -

she wants to move in with him and take care of him, and he won't let her. he won't let jocelyn be the bad guy, either, even though she'd let him, he knows. she'd let him tell joanna that jocelyn wouldn't let her. they haven't loved each other in years, but she was there when his dad -

jocelyn would let him, if he asked. he doesn't ask. it's his fault.

he won't let joanna take him to the doctor, won't let her pick up his medications, won't let her stay over in case she hears him throwing up at 3am again, won't let her help with all the sundries that come up when you're slowly wasting away.

he knows she wants to help, knows what he's doing isn't fair, either, but what is fairness when it comes to families? what is fairness when it comes to the memories and the regrets and the forked paths you can never, ever backtrack to.

why did you even come home, she asks, if you weren't going to let me help? she's so angry. she reminds him so much of himself.

what can he tell her? the truth, that he had nowhere else to go? the truth, that he is selfish and he couldn't bear never seeing her again? the truth, that it turns out that he really is his father's son?

that she really is her father's daughter?

he has nightmares, some nights, imagining that this is the great curse on the mccoy family tree. imagining her in thirty years right back here, in this moment, right where he is. he knows how many terminal illnesses there are in this universe. any one of them could have her name on it.

i'll be most effective on the job in the time left, if you'll keep this to yourself

the pain...stop the pain...son...release me...

jocelyn chooses to help more than he's comfortable with, but then she's never listened to him when he said he could handle something on his own. that was never their problem, was it. it's 3am and he's throwing up again and he tries to remember what their problems were, tries to remember why she threw him out, why spock and jim threw him out, why everyone he's ever loved has -

it doesn't matter.

it doesn't matter, does it. how many months does he have left? how many people does he have left that can throw him away? if they're not already gone, at least he will be, soon.

he's written his letters and he's arranged his affairs. he won't let it get as bad it he knows it will get. he won't -

he will not ever let anyone hear him -

he wonders, some nights, what it cost his dad to ask him. thinks about what it had cost leonard himself to ask chapel to stay silent, what it had cost him to ask kirk to let him stay, what it had cost -

he's blocked all avenues of communication from kirk and spock, by now. hasn't answered scotty or uhura for weeks. he'd tried to block chapel, but she -

she shows up on his doorstep six months after he leaves the enterprise. tells him she's taking a leave of absence to care for a family member. tells him, with that steady smile and cautious eyes that she's been in contact with jocelyn. shows him the documentation that she's listed as his next of kin.

jocelyn must have forged that, he thinks. wants to laugh. wants to punch a goddamn wall.

go back to the ship, he tells her, you're gonna fuck up your career taking a leave like this.

i only joined the enterprise to find roger, she says. c'mon, leonard. love always comes first. we only have so much time.

he can see it in her eyes, that she knows why he doesn't want her there. not after his father - he's never told her that, and he knows jocelyn never would. but she's always called him her worst patient. always known he could never let himself be vulnerable. used to chide him about it. used to -

you're not gonna kick me out into the cold, are you? she asks.

you really think i'm gonna let you boss me around my last few months on earth?

3am that night, she runs a cool washcloth across the back of his neck, brings him a glass of water so he can rinse out his mouth, says nothing at the angry, helpless tears in his eyes.

it takes her a week to ask him. she has more patience than he gave her credit for.

you gonna talk to them?

there's only one them for him, isn't there.

there isn't anything left to say, he says. it's the truth, isn't it?

you're really going to keep pushing them away?

they did that on their own, he says. wishes he meant it. wishes he -

let me stay, he thinks. release me, he thinks. don't tell anyone, he thinks. let me help you, he thinks. you've got to hold on, he thinks. let me -

he knows his father loved him. he loved his father, too. loved him so much that he would have given anything -

did. did give everything. gave his father up. gave his father up, and then had to live with it. has been living with it all these years.

he's tired of asking people for things that they can't give him. tired of not asking people for things they want to give him.

tired. just tired. been tired all his life, hasn't he. steeped in it.

looks at joanna's blue eyes, and sees the exhaustion in her. sees his own eyes, doesn't he. sees his own eyes, looking at his father. begging him.

i've done everything i can do. you've got to hang on.

hold on, he thinks. because he begged him, too. begged his father, too. he forgets that part of the story, sometimes, but it's been hard to forget, lately. thinks about joanna kneeling by his body, begging him. begging him to hold on.

why had he asked his father to hold on when he was so desperate to let go? why had he tried to make him stay when he was hurting so badly? was he that scared of being alone?

lonely, he thinks. he's lived a lonely life, hasn't he.

was that the last time he begged someone to stay?

he hadn't begged jocelyn. didn't even ask her to stay, did he. just listened to her, and nodded, and threw his shit together, and kissed joanna on the head, and took off to a hotel.

to a hotel. why hadn't he gone to a friend's? why hadn't he gone to a friend, and sat down, and poured out everything that was going on? why hadn't he asked for help? why hadn't he asked jocelyn for help before things got as bad as they did? maybe there wasn't anything still left to save, but it took them years to be friends again, didn't it. couldn't he at least have left as friends, instead of making them claw their way back to it?

he asks her, one day. she's taking him to the doctor. even chapel isn't able to sway her when jocelyn decides on something, and she's decided she wants to be here for him. so he asks her.

that was one of our problems, she says. says it easy, now, even though her mouth pinches, like it still hurts a little. you never needed me, leonard. never wanted to need me. i always felt like i had to bulldoze you if i wanted to help you, which eventually starts to feel a little counterproductive. and things haven't really changed, have they? you're just too tired to fight me anymore.

he is, he thinks. he is tired.

he is so tired of letting go of things. of being let go of. of running away. of being run from.

a lonely life, he thinks.

thinks, hold on, dad. please don't leave me. please keep fighting. i need you to keep fighting. please don't leave me.

wonders, now, with the benefit of hindsight, what his dad must have thought when he heard him begging. did he think leonard selfish?

is joanna selfish, he thinks. is chapel? is jocelyn?

it's just humans, isn't it. just humans trying to hold on a little longer. don't leave me. don't make me leave.

and then, finally, let me go.

he hasn't told chapel that he's made plans. he should. he can't and he won't. he doesn't need her to -

he doesn't want her to ask him not to do it. he doesn't want her to ask him to stay. to fight. to linger.

nine months since he left the enterprise. he can't focus on the studies that chapel still reads religiously. still looking for answers. he remembers that. he remembers how that feels. he remembers the hope and the hopelessness tangling together.

we have time, joanna says every time they talk. we will have time.

hold on, he thinks. keep fighting, he thinks.

spock and kirk have resorted to sending physical letters and packages.

let me go, he thinks. they pile up in his study, unopened. let me go, let me go, let me -

jocelyn and joanna come over for dinner a few times a week, chapel and jocelyn talking easily together, joanna's eyes too often focused on the way leonard moves the food around on his plate but barely eat. he barely keeps anything down these days. he watches those blue eyes watch him watch her, and he -

are you going to open those letters? jocelyn asks him, and he wants to laugh. wants to cry.

it doesn't matter, he says.

she takes his face in her hands, her eyes serious, her voice steady. it's all that matters, leonard.

she loved him, once. loves him all over again now, he thinks. it's a gift, isn't it, to be loved.

it's a curse, as well.

you're his doctor -

i'm his son!

3am, and there's nothing inside of him to throw up, nothing inside him left to claw out, nothing but his still beating heart, his paper-thin lungs, the last few secrets he's swallowed and never spat out.

he sits down amid the letters and the packages, but can't bring himself to open them. what could it matter, he thinks, if they care? he knows they care. what would it matter, he thinks, if they love him? he knows they love him as best as they're able. what does it matter if they did what they thought was the right thing to do?

he's never going to see them again.

he's never going to see them again, is he. he's never -

it's too much to cry through, so he doesn't cry. just sits there, amid the letters and the packages, the last desperate resort they had to try to contact him. to try to make him listen.

they'd made him leave, so he'd left, hadn't he? hadn't he done what they wanted?

if you'll keep this to yourself -

he hadn't really asked, had he. hadn't been able to bring himself to ask. not the real question. not what he'd really meant.

kirk had given him his answer anyway, hadn't he. hadn't even given it a day before asking for a replacement. that's how easy he was to replace, wasn't he. and they'd found one, and they'd brought them aboard, and mccoy had walked away without looking back.

kirk had wanted to talk, then, too, but what was there left to say? he could count on one hand the number of times he'd really asked kirk for something. he could -

i'll call you, kirk had called after him, and mccoy hadn't looked back. hadn't answer any of his calls. had blocked him. and now, these letters and packages piled around him.

spock had barely said anything at all. mccoy had already been so turned inside out that he'd thought little of it. if kirk didn't want him, of course spock wouldn't want him, either.

besides, if mccoy had a year left, what the logic in spock trying to remain in contact with him? what was a year worth? what was a friend worth? what was mccoy -

it doesn't matter, he thinks. tries to think. tries to will himself to believe. it doesn't matter, because if he lets it matter -

he falls asleep out there, that night. chapel chides him, but she can't do much more than that. he's deteriorating rapidly, now.

he should call them, he thinks for the first time. thinks he doesn't want them to see him like this. remember him like this.

his plans are made. his letters are written. the hypo -

he should call them, he thinks. can't bear to do so.

thinks of his father, begging, thinks of him begging his father.

thinks of kirk's face before mccoy had turned away. the careful blankness of spock's when he'd started to raise his fingers in the vulcan salute, and then bitten back his traditional goodbye. live long and prosper, mccoy snorts. what a goddamn joke.

he should call them, he decides. he'll keep it brief. just long enough that they won't have to haunted by any what-ifs. he can give that to them. he should give that to them. just because he's always been the one who'd loved more than he should doesn't mean they don't love him at all. he knows they do. he knows he's hurt them.

thinks he can swallow down his own hurt one last time, swallow it down long enough to give them the goodbye they need. give them what they need, even if it hurts him to do so.

the pain...stop the pain...son...release me...

he's good at giving people what they need, isn't he. just once -

it doesn't matter. he won't let it matter. not for this. he'll let them go. let them let him go. give them what they need.

he worries over it for one more night, and then he checks his comm. there are too many messages to even glimpse at - it seems like half the enterprise has tried to contact him over the last three days. he worries over that for a moment as well - has something happened? is someone hurt? is someone - well. is someone besides him dying?

he can't take the time to read or watch them now, though. his brain gets too foggy too quickly these days, and he has to use his time to his best advantage.

he unblocks spock and jim.

hesitates over both of their photos for a moment, deciding. not that it matters - they're probably together.

jim will be angrier, but he'll be more hurt if he calls spock first. his head is pounding. his mouth is dry. it will have to be a short call. at least he has that - he can turn it off whenever he wants, escape them any time he wants. there's a universe between them.

they put a universe between them.

he calls jim. waits. almost laughs at the idea that all this build-up, he might not answer. probably can't answer. probably too busy saving the universe.

what was he thinking? that he was going to just sit and wait around for him? kirk didn't even want him there. he didn't - of course he wouldn't -

he's being foolish. he'll try back later. he has time. he still has a little left, doesn't he. a few more weeks. maybe a few months if he's lucky.

he's never been that lucky, has he. the great mccoy curse.

he reaches for his comm, decides not to leave a message, decides -

bones? jim says. his eyes look wild. he looks so young. he looks so old, somehow, too.

hi, jim, mccoy says. his voice sounds steady. his hands are steady.

did they finally get through to you? jim asks. he's speaking so fast it's almost hard to parse the words, or maybe that's just mccoy's tired brain.

what?

the crew, did they finally get through to you? they've been trying non-stop -

i don't know what you're talking about, jim.

that's the house, a voice suspiciously like spock's says. mccoy smiles a little. he knew they'd be together. they've always been at their best together, haven't they. never needed -

just hold on, bones, jim says, and mccoy rolls his eyes. of course. death bed goodbyes, and of course he's being asked to hold. he shouldn't have called. he shouldn't -

why don't you just gimme a call when you're free, mccoy says, trying to keep his voice light. trying so hard it feels like he's choking on the words. choking on the love. choking, choking, choking.

bones -

i should go, mccoy says. got a busy day myself. tell spock i said hi.

tell himself, you goddamn idiot, kirk says.

there's a knock at the door, and mccoy wants to get off of this call, wants to lock himself away, can't beginto deal with whoever is visiting, can't bear to see joanna like this, can't -

i have to go, jim, mccoy says.

there's a louder banging on the door, and mccoy drags a hand across his forehead.

you aren't going anywhere, you sonuvabitch, kirk says

and then someone starts trying to break the goddamn door down, and mccoy bolts to his feet. sways.

sit down, bones, kirk says, his face too close to the screen, his eyes wide and worried, sit down before you fall down and kill yourself

it doesn't matter, mccoy says, barely realizing he's saying it out loud until he hears kirk's sharp inhale

there are footsteps in the hallway

maybe someone's coming to kill him. it makes as much sense as anything else, and he's so tired, isn't he.

keep fighting.

he's just so tired.

hold on.

he slumps back onto the couch. closes his eyes.

i have to go, he says. says it to jim, to spock, to the footsteps coming closer and closer. you have to let me go.

someone sits down next to him. puts their hand on his thigh.

you're not going anywhere, jim says.

and then mccoy frowns, a little. blinks his eyes open.

that voice didn't sound like it was coming from a communicator. that sounded like -

jim is sitting next to him, and spock is moving rapidly around to the other side of the couch. sitting down next to him as well.

what - he says, disoriented. wide-eyed.

afraid.

we have found a cure, doctor, spock says, reaching out and taking mccoy's wrist gently in his hand.

you aren't going anywhere, jim says. i'm not gonna let you.

what are you doing here? mccoy says.

what the hell do you think? jim says, his hand tightening on mccoy's thigh.

leonard, spock says. we are bringing you home.

#uhhhhh this is super long and should probably actually be turned into an actual fic #i was just gonna jot off like 500 words. i did not expect............this. SO. yeah. might turn it into an actual fic. but for now. here. #have 3400 words written directly into this tumblr post lmao??? oh well #star trek #star trek tos #leonard mccoy #fic #mine #st:tos #listen i just have a LOT of feelings about FTWIHAIHTTS in relation to mccoy's dad AND joanna #just a LOT of feelings okay!!!! #character study