#i choked on my tears

[wordsifelt]

Reading Husky And His White Cat Shizun is a freaking rollercoaster, like, it's such a heartbreaking novel, I have never cried so much over a piece of literature before (which considering my reading preferences is pretty shocking), the words literally crush your soul into tears and then *Tada!* there's stuff like this-

Like wtf Meatbun?? Is this angst or comedy pls stick with one my heart can't take this type of complete 180 in such a short span of time

#i was busy sobbing #minding my own damn business #and then i read this #and i laughed so hard #i choked on my tears #this novel is testing my limits #husky and his white cat shizun #2ha #chu wanning #mo ran #mo ran x chu wanning #meatbun doesn't eat meat

[vita-divata]

Together again

#my art #jujutsu kaisen #satosugu #satoru gojo #suguru geto #I’m not okay #I’m suing Gege who’s with me #and pressing charges for emotional damage #I love them so much im #choking on tears rn #I’m never drawing jjk angst again only fluff from now on

[jojolightningfingers]

i truly truly will never stop being tickled by how law's braincell count just plummets into the negatives whenever he's around luffy and kid SPECIFICALLY at the same time. like if it's one or the other he copes more or less just fine. kid's a shit-starter but he's predictable and easy (and fun) to rile up. luffy runs on baffling logic but he's fundamentally easy to get along with so long as you maintain your zen and understand that he usually doesn't MEAN to get under anybody's skin. separately they aggravate law in different ways. but when they're together kid's penchant for starting dickswinging contests (or inability to not take the bait of one) collides with luffy unhesitatingly answering with a one-up that no sane person would conceive of and what the hell is law supposed to do against THAT fuckin wombo combo. get left behind and called a bitch for it? not goddamn LIKELY!!

#trafalgar law #monkey d luffy #eustass kid #captain trio #supernova trio #one piece #[choking back tears] they are so stupid your honor #law: i'm gonna stand here and take a yonko's attack bc dodging means i'm a loser #law: i'm gonna jump my submarine off a waterfall bc kid said luffy and i were cowards for considering safety risks #babygirl WHAT are you trying to prove we already know you're a little cringefail and we love you like that #you've been part of the circus since punk hazard just give it up #caesar wasn't the only clown on that island #bizarre adventures

[c0smiccl0wn]

here @kandidandi. this is for you.

(image id under cut)

[image id: a textured digital peice of moon. he’s sitting in a puddle of blood with scratch marks around him. the words “i just miss your stupid face” are written to the right. the period at the end of the sentence is dripping with blood. /end id]

#you’ve taken my heart and smashed it against the metaphorical pavement until it was unrecognizable mush #so i made this with what remained of my brain #just the thought of moon being trapped made me actually tear up #i’m not exaggerating #like i actually got choked up #fnaf sb #fnaf moon #ysf #cosmic’s art

[honeygrahambitch]

If they actually dress as Will and Hannibal, it's over for me

#i will need someone to cpr me #c2e2 2024 #cause i will choke on my own tears #hannibal #hannigram #hannibal lecter

[etrevil]

How can I live, laugh, and love after knowing this panel of Ranpo exists???

#MY BOY FEELS FOR HIS DAD #AND HIS COULD HAVE BEEN DAD TOO #AHHHHHHH THIS FINALE FUCKED ME OVER #i choked on tears when this came up #bungou stray dogs #bsd anime #bsd #bungou stray dogs season five #bsd season 5 #bsd season five #bsd spoilers #ranpo edogawa #bsd ranpo

[touchd0wn-boy]

Lollapalooza Argentina | March 15, 2024 | ONE MORE TIME

#ok i'm done now #just wanted everyone to know that tom DID look at mark after this line while choking back tears so. you know. my night has been going well #i hate this fucking band #blink 182 #tom delonge #mark hoppus #uploads

[spabetty]

they are the definition of that “i’ve got to know every version of you and loved each one” quote

#one day #emma morley #dexter mayhew #this show had me choking on my own tears #i was convinced i wouldn’t cry #i did #emmadex

[thirstyforjere]

#until there are roblems #need him in a way that makes me a national threat in finland #did the director just tell him to “kill the girlies” #i need him to beat my ass #until i need a knee replacement #until tears run down my face AND my legs #käärijä #jere pöyhönen #im a 24/7 drive through for him #need him to cho cho choke me

[gaydexvocaloid]

wil zola project with locs is my everything

#wil #zola project #zola project wil #vocaloid #I KNOW HE LOOKS SO DIFFERENT TO ‘CANON’ WIL BUT.. #I LOVE HIM.. #i’ve never rlly seen wil as green coded ngl #he just suits orange 2 me.. #first time drawing him with locs and i love it #if i made any errors that aren’t cartoon-style related with drawing them tho pls tell me #id like to draw them best i can in a cartoon style !!? #idk where that question mark came from anyway #i love wil zola project #i used no sketch so this may be off so whoops #i drew it after spending hours working on a wall ( tearing wallpaper putting plaster up #etc #so my hands were fucked #but . the sudden wil inspiration had me in a choke hold

[sapphire-weapon]

I’m about to vomit out a bunch of thoughts, and I’m not sure any of this is going to make sense by the end, but. I’ve been thinking a LOT about these three lines in RE4make:

“You haven’t changed. You just think you have.”

“You can’t save her. You can’t save anyone.”

“This time, it has to be different...”

I’ve seen people focus in on that Krauser line and tie it directly back to Sherry, which is cool! Even as recently as five years ago, people completely glossed over Sherry’s impact on Leon’s life, and it’s cool that the remakes have had people digging into his character and realizing “oh shit, literally everything that happens to him after RE2 is because of his paternal love for Sherry.”

But... Krauser’s line is about more than just her.

With the remake turning Krauser into Leon’s combat trainer, chances are he knows about everything that happened in Raccoon City. And I don’t mean, like. He read a government file. Leon probably told him.

In OG, Krauser and Leon have this exchange of dialogue:

Krauser: “What is it that you fight for, comrade?” Leon: “My past, I suppose.” Krauser: “Hmph. Umbrella.”

It was axed completely from the remake, because it doesn’t make sense for it to happen in the remake. If Krauser was Leon’s trainer, that question was probably asked very early in their relationship. And since they weren’t currently in a fight to the death, and because they weren’t already six years removed from Raccoon City, chances are, Leon’s answer was a bit more involved than just “my past.”

So, let’s back up a little bit. In RE2make, they basically turned Kendo into a completely different character. OG Kendo was literally just there to point a shotgun at Leon and/or Claire and then go “oh my bad you’re not a zombie” and hook them up with some guns before he gets eaten. In RE2make, he’s a desperate and terrified father just trying to spend his last few moments with his infected 6 or 7 year old daughter before she turns. After he shuts the door on Leon and Ada, Leon turns to Ada and says, “Protecting people like that is why I joined the force.”

But Leon doesn’t protect or save Kendo or his daughter. He doesn’t protect or save... anyone. Every single person that Leon comes into contact with and tries to save dies horrifically -- and some, he even has to kill, himself (Marvin Branaugh). The only people who make it out of Raccoon City alive are people who saved themselves (Claire and Ada).

Of course, there is Sherry. But Leon didn’t save Sherry; Claire did. ESPECIALLY in remake canon, since nearly all of Leon’s scenes with Sherry got severely shortened or removed completely in RE2make.

But then, when Claire entrusts Sherry to Leon’s care (on his own insistence, per her RE3 epilogue), he goes and fucks that up, too. Gets her kidnapped and held hostage indefinitely by the federal government, and the only thing he can do about it is do exactly as they say and just hope they keep their end of the bargain and not hurt her.

So, when Krauser says “You can’t save anyone,” he means anyone. Ever. And even up to that point in RE4... Leon got the two officers who drove him into town killed, and he watched Luis die a slow, agonizing death right in front of him. And then, past that point, Leon has to kill Krauser with his own hands. Then he watches Mike die.

Ashley is literally Leon’s first and only success story, up to this point in canon. (And even when you go all the way up to current-day canon, Ashley is one of... three? People? I can think of? Total? Who Leon actually saves?)

So, Leon saying, “This time, it has to be different,” he doesn’t just mean Sherry. He means Ada. He means Kendo. He means Marvin. He means the entirety of Raccoon City. He’s staring down a repeat of what happened back then, not in terms of the bioterror situation, but in terms of his own personal failures. His survivor’s guilt. He can’t handle the thought that he’ll be the only person to walk away again -- and he refuses to be.

And that’s why Ada’s line bothers me so fucking much.

I mean, first of all -- Ada, you haven’t seen this man in six years, and you’ve spent a total of like five minutes with him since meeting up with him again here, so how the fuck would you even know -- but even aside from that...

To be clear: she’s right.

But she’s also wrong.

Leon has changed -- to an extent. In RE2 (OG or remake), Leon honestly believed that if it was lawful, then it was also morally right. He doesn’t believe that anymore. There’s no more “letting the law sort it out” or trusting in the power of authority for him anymore. His moral compass has been boiled down to: “If you hurt or murder innocent people, you’re a fucking asshole, and I don’t really care who you are, I’ll kill you myself.”

RE2 Leon was willing to hear people out and give them an honest benefit of the doubt -- even Annette Birkin. RE4 Leon just tells people to shut the fuck up before opening fire.

RE2 Leon was honest and trusting to a fault, and he felt stronger as part of a team. RE4 Leon is suspicious almost to the point of paranoia, and he just wants to be left the fuck alone to do his job.

These are all things that were really important to who Leon was in Raccoon City, and they’re reasons why things turned out the way they did for him, back then.

But at the same time, Ada’s right in saying that, at the core of it all, Leon is still that kind-hearted, decent guy who just wants the good guys to win and the bad guys to lose. That’s why it hits him somewhere sensitive when Krauser says: “You can’t save anyone.” 

It’s just that, now, the way he approaches it is different. His outlook on life in terms of his goals is different. His expectations for it have changed.

So, if Leon had been smarter/wittier, he absolutely could have turned it around on her and said: “No, I’ve definitely changed. You just think I haven’t.”

And not only would that sound threatening as fuck, he’d also be right. They both would be, at that point.

And for all of those major parts of him to have changed and still be facing down the possibility of failing every single person he comes across, especially Ashley...

"This time, it has to be different.”

And this time, it was.

#resident evil 4 #leon kennedy #meta analysis #and it WOULDN'T have been different if leon hadn't changed #could you imagine how RE4 would've ended if leon was still his RE2 self and tried to apprehend krauser instead of killing him #or like give him a second chance #like 'i beat you now you can repent' #fucking LUL #that's how you fucking die comrade #unfortunately leon succeeding in RE4 also taught him to emotionally close himself off and push everyone away #classical conditioning and all that #but that's a separate post for a separate time #if they ever remake RE6 watch me clown honk my way through leon and sherry's fucked up relationship #claire goes to see sherry regularly and leon admits out loud he hasn't even spoken to her in at least 3 years #and then chokes up with tears when he finally sees her again #smfh he's so fucking stupid #leon if you can't cope with your trauma properly then just shut up and keep drinking god i can't stand you #one day i'll also write a big post about leon's suicidal ideation #today is not that day #but one day

[spaciebabie]

*holds up mic*

*clears throat*

Cock

*bows*

#spacie splains #*claps you on the back* #holf my friend...... #*tears up* #you #*chokes on my tears* #you're. you- #*bursts out sobbing* #YOU #*bites my knuckles* #I- #*cries quietly*

[onlyswan]

bts and their ability to make me burst into laughter even in the middle of sobbing. this is love.

#JUNGKOOK RUNNING ACROSS THE SCREEN WITH HIS BALD HEAD FOR LITERALLY A SPLIT SECOND #I CHOKED ON MY TEARS 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[ziskeyt]

thinking about how, in a lot of fics i’ve read with BotW Link he has a fear of caves. Or, well, trauma around them due to, you know, being dead inside one for a century and locked away.

and then in TotK the world collapsed and suddenly there are caves everywhere. But, they aren’t just new caverns, many of them have ruins inside and I just. I know Link is ~supposed to be a blank slate character~ and all that rot. But like, if this game full of caves and darkness below is supposed to be a sequel to BotW — I dunno. It just feels lacking that we get nothing, no reaction to caves in general, none to what happened to the Shrine, none when you discover what is below the Shrine. I mean, the way they did Link’s reactions to memories in BotW was laughable anyway and obviously I am craving for far more than nintendo will ever give — but what is courage without fear?

#Totk #Botw #Loz #tears of the kingdom #breath of the wild #these thoughts brought to you by: i am trying to sleep but my throat wants to choke me #And like i haven’t played any of the other games aside from link’s awakening #But i feel like you can understand fear in the child who’s paternal figure dies and is then sent out to fight #And fear in the child who’s younger sister is stolen away #But these kids have courage (and recklessness and foolishness but *courage*) to try and find their sister and try and stop more from dying #Like their tree dad did #We the player may feel fear of the screaming gloom hands or the ticking guardian laser #Or the darkness of the depths pre lightroots (tho i should do that again now i fixed my tv) #But even with no memories this link still has fears. Or. It is reasonable to think he should #Yet in game? #His courage is just he has to do this #He has to fight he has to continue he has to win #I love botw/totk link for what i have put into him but i just wish nintendo weren’t such fucking cowards

[hamartia-grander]

"why would you ever visit home if your parents suck so bad" my baby brother sobbed so hard his nose bled because he didn't want me to leave.

#I was literally choking back tears as I got into the car good lord above I am not strong enough for this #My younger sister is noticeably happier when I'm home and my youngest sister has someone she can actually talk to when I'm home #I raised my baby brother he is my kid and my other younger brother sees me as his only line of defence against our father #I am the only parental figure they have that doesn't hurt them. I am the eldest daughter. #I go home BECAUSE my parents suck so bad

[the-corvus-bandit]

So uh, watching criminal minds here and I'm at season 6 episode 4. Why is no one is talking about how Spencer inadvertently calls himself a beta male? I fucking choked

#the tears in my eyes are from both laughing so hard and from choking #i think i tore up the inside of my throat from that #criminal minds #spencer reid #okay people probably are talking but im just casually watching the show so i have no clue what people have said about it #ive caught a couple of episodes over the years but im just now watching the show in order #and im technically missing a lot of it cause im usually doing other stuff #but i did not fucking miss that #goddamn