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madara-fate · 19 days

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I don't want to be a asshole or anything, but I really struggle with the notion of a 'well-written female character' that people have been shoving down our throats in recent years. Nowadays, for a female character to be considered 'well-written,' she must either primarily fit the 'badass femme fatale' archetype - almost invulnerable with its derivatives - or be a 'masculine woman’.

Oddly enough, these are also the two most popular types of women in fiction right now (lol).

How is what we are doing today inherently different from before?

We have taken female characters out of the tropes that imprisoned them... to fundamentally lock them into other stereotypical tropes that we refuse to let them out of again. These types of characters are often praised as examples of quality female representation, but is that really the case?

I'm not saying they are bad, far from it. But that shouldn't be all there is, that's my complaint about it. And people should also stop passing this off as 'representation' when most of these characters are far too unrealistic to even come close. They are amazing, yes, they are icons to admire because they are truly impressive for the most part, but I challenge anyone to say they are relatable. And that's fine because they're not even supposed to be in the first place.

Fiction should have these types of women because it's fiction, but it should also make room for other types of female characters. The diversity of roles for women is terribly limited, and honestly, I can't really say it's entirely the media's fault.

Is it really too much to ask for diversified female characters?

I would also like to see more realistic women. There are some, yes, but not many, and strangely these types of characters tend to be labeled as poorly written and then completely rewritten by their fandom to fit their idealized version of what a 'good female character' should be.

The funny thing about this is that people don't even realize that with this kind of behavior, they are perpetuating stereotypes that ironically they are trying to break. Some realize it but prefer to absolve themselves by blaming the media/authors they accuse of poorly writing women, largely in order to justify the disgusting and relatively hypocritical behaviors they have towards certain female characters.

This is particularly evident in Sakura's case; the hatred people have for her is just pathological at this point, further exacerbated by mass effect. Many fans blame Kishimoto for « writing her poorly », which they believe is their main issue with her character. The fact is when you look at the situation as a whole, this excuse doesn't even hold up. The things she is condemned for cannot be solely attributed to her; some of the other most popular characters in this franchise exhibit the same characteristics and sometimes even worse than anything she has shown before, but for some reason, she is the only character in this series who is so vilified because of it. When it comes to others, most fans make excuses for them, except you can't judge a character for something they did while turning a blind eye or even worse, praise another for doing exactly the same thing; it's a blatant double standard and it's not objective at all.

Her character isn't perfect; she is horribly underused and since she occupies the position of tritagonist aka heroine, it stands out more than others who, although also sidelined, are only supporting characters. That's the main problem I've always had with Kishimoto's writing about her, but apart from that, I really can't find much bad to say about her character. Again, I'm not saying she's perfect; far from it, but that's what makes her interesting. Sakura's role was to bring a more human side to this series; that was her job. She was never supposed to be like her teammates; Sakura was meant to stay on a human scale because she was created for that.

That's the beauty of her character.

Changing that is changing her very essence, what makes her who she is, and that's what this fandom does; they rewrite her by using the excuse of 'poor writing' as a kind of defensive flag and eliminate from her character everything that makes her, well... her.

Mabel, (a character from the show Gravity Falls) is another case of a rather strange fandom. She is literally 13 years old and yet her character at the time (and even today) has sparked such waves of hatred that those who hadn't watched the show could believe she's the she-Devil incarnate when she... just acts her age. She is, however, an adorable child. She is eccentric, good-hearted, quite prone to blunders, but that's also what makes her endearing. However, the way some talk about her is just... revolting.

To hear them, being a pre-adolescent in fiction and behaving as such is a crime. Like Sakura, she also suffers from a rewriting of her character - although it doesn't manifest in the same way - and from what I've noticed, sometimes it's not even done consciously.

Another thing I've noticed is that they are not the only type of characters to benefit from this treatment from fandoms. Even female characters meeting their 'writing standards' sometimes have these problems. Just look at Diana (Wonder Woman), and how some - many - of her fans have transformed her. She went from the epitome of feminism, meaning a woman treating everyone as equals regardless of their gender, believing in justice and doing her best to uphold it into a lame and arrogant fanon version of herself who hates men, thinks she's superior to them, believes girls are the best thing in the world and no man can surpass them - apparently their version of feminism.

People need to understand that just as we can't please everyone, not all characters can suit everyone's tastes, which is normal. They should focus more on what suits them and ignore what doesn't instead of trying to adapt characters that are not their cup of tea to their personal tastes.

Really.

This crap is why there are so many fanon versions of 'strong and feminist women,' not because their canon version is 'poorly written,' but because they are not written according to their tastes.

On the rare occasions when we actually have unusual characters, different from what we're used to seeing, the fandom takes it upon itself to ruin that by transforming them, thus ruining their characterization.

God only knows how much I have my own issues with the current film industry - and some authors in general - but I acknowledge that they at least make the effort to try in certain aspects, whereas fans don't even try. They tend to blame everyone but themselves because they refuse to accept that they are also part of the problem. So yes, the media is certainly crappy in some ways, but the fandom with their obsession with wanting to "fix" every work or character that doesn't suit them, makes it even crappier. They standardize everyone.

I it's all well and good to reblog/like posts criticizing fandom spaces and their treatment of fictional characters, but maybe it would be wise to actually apply what you claim to agree with, and not selectively.

This is a subject I didn't really intend to address on Tumblr, but I couldn't help myself after coming across one of your requests where you were talking about the writing of female characters in Naruto. As someone who is currently writing a thesis on media-fandom dynamics, this syndrome of 'good/bad writing' is one of the points I address, which prompted me to express my opinion.

Anyway, I hope I'm not bothering you with my overly long essay; I tend to talk way too much when a subject is close to my heart.

I'll be honest - When I first saw the length of your ask, I was just like "holy shit", and my first thought was to just read it and give a generic "yeah I agree" answer at the end. However, this was a very good read and I pretty much agreed with most, if not all of what you said. So it ultimately made me want to give my thoughts on a few specific things you mentioned which resonated with me.

Yep, I made a similar point during this post where I discussed a YouTube video about how Nobara (JJK) is apparently what Sakura (Naruto) was supposed to be, and I went into detail about how utterly flawed their reasoning was.

As much as I understand why people want women to have more diverse roles and not be reduced to the 'dumb blonde,' the 'damsel in distress,' or the 'walking love interest' as before, I also think that what we have today does just as much of a disservice to female representation as years ago. How is what we are doing today inherently different from before? We have taken female characters out of the tropes that imprisoned them... to fundamentally lock them into other stereotypical tropes that we refuse to let them out of again. These types of characters are often praised as examples of quality female representation, but is that really the case?

Yep, the feminist, boss babe archetype is dominating now. It's even seeped into the Marvel movies, which is a component of why they have tanked recently. It hasn't improved their character depth, and it often just seems as though the writers these days care more about racial diversity, LGBTQ representation, and their skewed idea of "female empowerment", rather than creating plots which are actually engaging and make sense.

I would like to see more weak women because it is not necessary to be traditionally strong to be valid. I want to see crazy people, psychopaths, eccentrics, but also sweet, shy, calm characters. I would like to see more women make mistakes without needing a tragic past to justify them. I would also like to see more realistic women. There are some, yes, but not many, and strangely these types of characters tend to be labeled as poorly written and then completely rewritten by their fandom to fit their idealized version of what a 'good female character' should be.

This part above resonated with me a lot.

The most uncomfortably accurate examples I have in mind are Mabel Pines and Sakura Haruno; just look at the hate these two receive to realize that a majority of the public can't handle female characters whose behavior is more human than extraordinary. The funny thing about this is that people don't even realize that with this kind of behavior, they are perpetuating stereotypes that ironically they are trying to break. Some realize it but prefer to absolve themselves by blaming the media/authors they accuse of poorly writing women, largely in order to justify the disgusting and relatively hypocritical behaviors they have towards certain female characters.

This is a very interesting point.

💯

It's as I always say - Sakura and or/SasuSaku are the exceptions to everything.

That is the reason why I even created this meme for myself, because I found myself saying this so often in response to Sakura being the only one getting hated on for things other characters have exhibited.

That reminds me of how often I see people describe themselves as Sakura fans, and then they proceed to criticise the fuck out of her (mainly due to her relationship with Sasuke and how it goes against all of their "boss babe" ideals of how apparently strong and independent women don't need no man!). And so I'm just like, how are you a Sakura fan then? If they had their way with Sakura's character, she would be unrecognisable to her canon self. They don't like Sakura, they like the idea of what they wanted her to be.

I don't watch Gravity Falls so I know nothing about the situation, but I can imagine what you're talking about.

Yep, that's essentially what recent feminism has devolved into, there's a lot of misandry involved in modern feminism, which is a shame because that doesn't align with its core principles.

The manner in which you articulated your opinions was very good, so I'm not surprised you're writing a thesis on this, I can tell how passionate you are about this topic. If you haven't done so already, you should consider starting your own blog or something similar as a hobby, I can tell you'd excel if the above is anything to go by 👍

#Sakura Haruno #Mabel Pines

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typellblog · 2 months

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sorry if this sounds rude but I really can't understand what you meant with your "its funny how theres so much 'callout posts abt transfems having weird kinks is Bad' discourse on here and everyones still too afraid to mention loli/shota by name" post

ok sure i can explain a bit more although its hard to tell what bit was confusing so ill just try to be as clear as possible

i see a lot of people talking about how its bad to call out transfems for their weird kinks. there's a lot of reasons for this, the idea of 'sexual deviancy' being bad is a transphobic stereotype that trans women are particularly vulnerable to, these accusations stick with you and can make life really difficult, especially if a large amount of your support network is online

but like the obvious corollary to this is there's nothing wrong with transfems (or others) having weird kinks. frankly i still wouldn't be a big fan of callout culture even if these accusations were always Real and Valid but clearly a big part of the reason why they're receiving pushback is that we shouldn't think being into weird porn is a problem.

and people tend to tiptoe around this part! they stick to the former talking points because they're more palatable to the general userbase than directly defending fetishes by saying stuff like you have to be nice to furries or gore art doesn't correspond to a desire to hurt people in real life

and there's nothing that people don't want to defend more than loli/shota content, to the point that even in these "don't do callouts over fetishes" posts often the issue is 'how dare you smear a trans woman by insinuating she likes or defends lolisho' and not 'who fucking cares'

which is like. kind of a problem if you happen to be a transfem who's also a lolicon (many of my friends)

in conclusion i don't necessarily blame people for acting this way (i understand the pressures of posting on this site) but I do think you actually do have to be okay with the weird fetish shit that gets called out if you're going to get mad at callout posts

this is a pro-lolicon account

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our-lesboy-experience · 26 days

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HELLOOO AGAIN! Ive been thinking abt this all day so I was wondering if had an opinion abt this? how do u feel abt cis men identifying as lesbians? /genq just wanted to hear what someone thought abt this

I've seen this asked a lot and it's also the point where some people start getting a bittt exclusionary (more so in a way they don't think deeper about it, because "how can a cis man experience queer attraction to women?" rather than something hateful)

for starters, "cis" is generally identifying with the gender assigned to you at birth (though im aware of intersex and detrans experiences that deviate from this). A person can both identify with their birth gender and other genders. a cis man can also be a trans woman. a cis woman can also be a trans man. obviously I'm talking about multigender people, and "cistrans" is a term for a reason

secondly, have you....EVER heard of a completely binary, cisgender man, seriously identifying with and feeling like he's a lesbian (no joke whatsoever) who 100% insists he's cis? there's definitely not a lot and not enough to raise a whole scandal about it

thirdly, many people have commented that they have heard of or they themselves felt connection to lesbian identity before realizing they were a trans woman. if a supposed cis man is seriously feeling like a lesbian.....then maybe that person is a trans woman? and we should give that person space to figure it out instead of getting mad about it?

and lastly, im not the type to throw a fit over someone identifying in good faith and certainly not in a way im probably never going to see. if a cis man actually feels as if he's a lesbian then I would just wish him luck in figuring things out for himself. it really doesn't affect me whatsoever, and drawing a hard line between "valid belonging trans women lesbians" and "invalid invading cis men lesbians" will never help anyone and from actual trans women I've seen say this, it just makes it harder for them to accept themselves and not feel like they're intruding on a space they don't belong in. just leave people with identities you don't understand alone

tldr; if a cis man seriously feels like a lesbian you should just wish him luck on his journey of self-discovery, and there's so few of them that it's pretty much a non-issue + multigender cistrans people exist

#lesboy #male lesbian #lesbian #asks #feel free to have more discussions on this/tell me if I'm missing something or said something wrong #my stance forever will be good faith identification doesn't harm anybody

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taylorswiftstylequestions · 22 days

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omfg i'm sorry to rant but i NEED a sympathetic person to hear this. i like the every single album podcast more than most swifties, but today's ep -- and the last few -- are driving me insane. i am so fucking sick of hearing nathan and nora wring their hands over what joe might deal with. all harassment is bad, but i am done pretending that jake g and john mayer went through….any kind of wringer? they had like...a semi-awkward couple of weeks? jake is still a mega a-lister and john mayer is widely considered to be one of the greatest living guitarists. fuck, what mayer did was outright predatory -- and he's done it to multiple women -- and lbr, he lives 99% of his life totally unperturbed by it. he's not losing gigs or status in the places that matter to him; i suspect a lot of swifties aren't aware of this but i'm a guitar nerd, and uh, yeah, he's considered a living god and no one gives a shit what he did to taylor. and literally everyone woman in the public eye, including taylor, goes through worse every single fucking day, even at their heights of popularity. i don't know how to deal with hearing nathan and nora worry about :(((( omg what will joe go through :((((( when he's never going to have disgusting ai porn of himself explode across twitter on a random weekday. maybe i feel this strongly b/c i work in games, where hordes of male fans regularly ruin random women's lives because they animated a female character wearing a t-shirt instead of a string bikini, but i can't deal with this anymore. these men are fine. lots of people get mad at them, but it's because they did truly shitty things to her and she refused to absorb it silently. then it breaks, and their lives go on.

---

I feel like Nora really articulated what Anon was trying to say the other day about along the gist of "I hope something really bad happened to justify all of this." Interesting perspectives! Btw I just want to be super clear that I don't think Taylor or anyone has to justify anything like that! Just thought it was interesting how Nora put it in the latest episode and T's power is the unusual part of this equation.

---

In a very classic "I thought the two of you should meet!" re: today's The Ringer / Every Single Album pod episode.

I will say I read both of these messages before listening to the episode myself and tbh I think Nora ultimately landed in a pretty middle and reasonable place (it started out pretty rocky though) by the end of the episode. My understanding is she ultimately felt like Taylor has every right to tell the story that she wants / needs to tell and the work will speak for itself. That this is Taylor going face to face with the elephant in the room and (probably - we don't know obviously) not obfuscating the reality that we all saw play out in real time behind 'fictionalized' half truths roleplayed by semi-imaginary characters. And at the end of the day the (likely - AGAIN WE DON'T KNOW) reality is that she's prepared to walk through the narrative that is this pressure cooker storyline many are waiting with baited breath for which is the deterioration of her most significant relationship to date.

All that to say is that I think both of these points are incredibly valid. I personally have a lot of feelings wrapped up in it that do tend to come down more on the side of it's strange that the default position is this desire to sign up as first in line defence attorney for a man when the crime as we know it is 'woman writes her life into art'.

Nora interestingly noted that there's a "pressure for this album to come with receipts" (paraphrase) based on this (fan) hyped up narrative of something sinister having gone awry that this album will pull the curtain back on. And if it fails to do that, enter said self-appointed attorneys.

#opinion #tss nanonsense

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cosmonadarovicarts · 2 months

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What do you think about the theory that Eve and Lilith are the same person?

I try to be open-minded to these theories, but I just can't accept this one hahaha

Not because I like that there are two different characters, but because the series hasn't shown anything really valid to prove this theory.

Just by introducing the story, they already show Lilith AND Eve. The two took different paths. how could it be possible for Lilith to be banished in hell with Lucifer -and gaining power -while Eve was outside of Eden, surviving and having thousands of children?

Until the iconic Lucifer vs. Adam fight scene, Lucifer says he got both of them, and Adam only got mad when he mentioned Eve.

Now the points that the defenders of this theory say: those character cards where Lilith's face does not appear - and her hair appears to be in Eve's hairstyle - the fact that Lilith is in heaven AND - the most iconic - the mysterious woman who carries Charlie in the song scene between Charlie and Lucifer.

I can't see how that would prove it's Eve and Lilith being the same person. Let's break it down:

this Lilith card: honestly, this card shows that we don't know Lilith yet. and the possibilities would be: is there really some entity possessing her body -Roo, Eve herself? Is Lilith keeping a secret? anyway, theories, and none that would lead to Lilith being Eve - ar most that eve would be possessing her body for some reason (??)

About lilith in the sky. Look, there's a lot of theories about it. she could have simply gotten tired of fighting the sky, she could have been plotting something against the sky... But she could be Eve?? I'm almost 100% sure Eve didn't go to heaven. she committed the act of disobedience. And what would that be like?? Would this Lilith/Eve character be switching places all the time? time materializing in hell and then in heaven?

and finally, the mysterious female figure from the Charlie and Lucifer song. It would be hilarious if it really was just Lilith. but I understand the appreciation that so many people had in this scene. In cartoons, in character design it is essential that their silhouette and colors differ from others. So it's understandable why that hair with a different hairstyle causes so much uproar, especially because Lilith's appearance was shown in the portraits. I'm not trying to put an end to this issue, but there are other possibilities that are more... plausible than being Lilith and Eve at the same time - even if it were just Eve it would make more sense.

Now let's talk about script construction. Seriously, what would the series gain from a plot like that? a lot of plot holes - just the fact that Eve ended up with Adam having children and Lilith in hell would break this. It's a confusing theory, which takes away the weight of the creation of these characters: Lilith being born from the same Dust as Adam, being her equal & Eve being born from Adam's rib.

Anyway, I think this theory would just make the series confusing and a little strange, with unnecessary complexity. At most, I think it would be reasonable for Eve to have possessed Lilith's body, which is still super weird.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fandom #hazbin #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel thoughts #hazbin hotel theory #hazbin hotel theory lilith and eve #hazbin hotel eve #eve x lilith #lilith morningstar #lilith hazbin hotel #hazbin theory

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arcadiabaytornado · 5 months

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How do you feel about those who have rather strong oppositions towards Rachel? It seemed as if she gets more hate compared to the people that did her wrong like Frank, Jefferson, and Nathan.

I have SO many opinions about the way people view Rachel because I think she's treated so unfairly by some of the fandom.

While Rachel wasn't the perfect angel Chloe thought she was, it does feel like some people shoved their fingers in their ears and went "LALALA" anytime anything even slightly positive was brought up about Rachel. I mean, people were MAD when "Before The Storm" came out and Rachel was shown as nuanced instead of evil. There were some people that acted she should have had a scene where she threatened to drop Chloe over a tank of piranhas. It was a rough time.

However, certain frustrations aside, I do think there are a lot of reasons people dislike Rachel. Some are very valid. Some...I have thoughts on. Some people judge her overly harshly because she's a woman and she's....brace yourself...flawed. As we all know, if a women has a single flaw some people in fandom will decide that she deserves death.

But misogyny isn't the only reason people take issue with Rachel. As for the complex reasons, I get some of them. A big point I hear a lot from the "Rachel sucks" camp is that she cheated on Chloe or at least wasn't honest with her. I understand why that would be too much for some people, and cheating is one of the quickest ways to make an audience dislike a character because a lot of people have experienced cheating firsthand. Some people are also uncomfortable with how Rachel lies and manipulates, which is fair. Some people just don't like her vibes, and that's also fine because sometimes a character just rubs you the wrong way.

I do think there are more reasons she's judged super harshly. A lot of her character is up to interpretation, and we never get to hear her side of the negative parts of the story. Then there's also the rabid Pricefield fans that will look at her with most critical eye possible, because they think if she or her relationship with Chloe was good in any way then that somehow undermines their OTP.

So my overall thought is that she is judged way to harshly, but also I can understand why some people take issue her character. I just wish people spent as much time analyzing her character as they do with Nathan because some people really think drugging and kidnapping women is more forgivable than maybe cheating on your situationship or getting in the way of a ship.

#life is strange #lis #rachel amber #asks #serainds

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kandyzee · 3 months

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HEY GUYS, THIS IS A MASSIVE RANT. I SENT MY FRIEND, thought u guys might wanna see it too 😜 cause it's about the Gallagher sisters, mainly 😘😘 IT PROBS DONR ALL MAKE SENSE anywayyy

Something I really like in shameless is how well the woman characters are written. The ones that we are meant to hate (Karen and sammi) are very good at making us hate them without their actions making no sense yk. They ain't just doing crazy shit so that u hate them they are just deeply flawed people. When Karen has her whole emo phase that makes sense to me. She's a clearly mental ill girl who has suffered alot. Yeah she cuts her hair and dyes it she makes bad choices but in a way that makes sense for her. I hate sammi for what she did to Ian and mickey but she had a reason. Sammi had her child taken away from her ofc she's gonna act a irrationally.

I reallyyy like Debbie and Fiona. They get alot of hate but I really think that'd because they don't take time to understand the characters. They aren't made to be hated but they are strong minded woman so ofc they get hate. One of the main cristisms of Debbie's character is that she is unappreciative, selfie and a bad mother . Debbie is a little rude, but the other stuff just makes no sense. Fiona gives alot of raise her siblings and Debbie shows she values that from the start of the show. She is constantly trying to look out for fiona because even at a young age she understood that fiona didn't have anyone to help her. Debbie (same as fiona) takes on alot of responsibility from a young age. You would think that the person who went through something that fiona can very much relate to would understand her right? It's crazy to me that so many people don't think that. The fact that Debbie takes on so much responsibility shows she isn't selfie and it shows she values fiona because she has always be willing to help. Debbie does do bad things ofc that's the point of the show but if u compare it to some of the male characters (like Frank who has done terrible things) the hate she gets is extremely disproportionate.

Fiona gets alot of hate for her relationships and that she is always "demanding praise". There is alot of valid criticism of fionas parenting that can be made such as her reactions to Ian being in a relationship with Jimmy Steve's dad or the fact she left Liam when she leaves the show. First I wanna talk about how she is "always demanding praise". I think that is very easily explained as that she didn't get any her whole childhood. Fiona had to start looking after her siblings as younge as 5 and even then she had to hear Frank dismiss her work for years. We know fiona was good at track and was in team at school but she had to drop out of school so she no longer had academic validation either. To her she had to give up everything to raise her siblings her childhood was taken from her it makes sense she wants to feel appropriated. Now the more interesting one to me. How fiona handles relationships, this will be alot of me guessing what her childhood was like cause we get hardly enough information

Fiona from the first season is presented as a 'slut' (I HATE THAT WORD) and given that she did have so much adult responsibility as a little girl I don't think it's far off to think that she falls into the "girl who thinks she's mature for her age and dated older men" pit. The fact that she so thinks Ian and ned is "just sex" enough tho ned is fucking dinosaur kinda strengthens that idea for me. She thinks it's normal for Ian because it was normal for her. Given that fiona wasn't getting parental or academic validation I can see her finding it through sex and less than healthy relationships. That why i think she goes back to Jimmy Steve when she knows he's not good for her, thats why she sleeps with her boss and his brother. Unhealthy and bad relationships are what she grew up with.

This kinda makes me wanna talk about how Debbie and fiona are just so similar. They have lots of shared experiences and often make the same mistakes/ choices. Debbie also finds herself in unhealthy relationships. Plus, they are both queer (ik fiona isn't canon, but we all remember Jasmine fiona is defo bi ). Fiona sadly is unable to keep her little sister from becomes in some ways like her. I think Debbie sees that. she has always understood fiona, so when she's starting to take a more "motherly " roll for the Gallaghers, she probably sees that she's the "new fiona". Unlike fiona tho Debbie has a real chance of giving franny a better life than her, franny doesn't have to grow up in a home where every one is fighting for themselves as much as they fight for each other. Franny won't take up so much responsibility like fiona and Debbie. THIS IS WHY SAYING DEBBIE IS A BAD MOTHER IS FUCKING STUPID.

ANYWAY, fiona isn't a perfect parent because she's not a parent. She's an older sister. She can't fill that role even if she did do everything right. Debbie isnt selfie, she grew up too fast and understands fiona to a level where that's enough, she doesn't always need to outwardly tell fiona "she's so thankful" "she's so proud" because she just gets it. Karen and sammi are well written characters.

Ofc I like Karen a whole lot more than I sammi. Karen actually means so much to me. She's gets even more hate then Debbie like ik that's the purpose of her character but I feel like they hating her for the wrong reasons. AND THUS IS ME ONLY TALKING ABOUT FI AND DEBBIE SO TELL ME IF U WANT TO KNOW ABOUT MANDY AND SVET OR LIKE KAREN MORE

#GOT JUDGE MY WRITING SKILLS rahhh #i love debbie #i love Fiona #fiona gallagher defender #debbie gallagher #debbie Gallagher defender #fiona gallagher #karen shameless #karen jackson #sammie shameless #shameless rant #shameless us #shameless

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pillarsalt · 5 months

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if this seems like a weird question feel free to ignore it! but.. if youve felt it, how do you deal with the guilt of "waking up" from transition and the narratives around it right now? i know logically in my mind that the current state of gender as a concept is a rehash/rebranding of old regressive standards, i know its not logical to do surgeries on young mentally ill and neurodivergent people who are in distress, i know that something cant be a social construct and biologically innate at the same time, and i know that the idea of "passing" or "transitioning to a woman" is misogynistic as hell, but i still feel bad for voicing or even thinking of any of it as wrong.

the majority of my friends are socially drowning in these concepts, and i cant even find any real lesbian friends, let alone someone who i might wanna date someday. i love them, but almost all of the same sex attracted women in my life hate themselves to some degree for being born women and try to seperate themselves from what they think womanhood is. it makes me feel hopeless as a detransitioned lesbian. any advice is appreciated :/

this got long so here's a cut:

I'm not a detransitioner myself, but I know there are many women on here and detrans lesbians specifically who would understand what you're going through. Anyone who'd like to reach out to anon in the notes is welcome to do so.

I do totally get what you mean about feeling guilty, even though your views are logically reasonable and feminist. Unfortunately that's by design: emotional manipulation and groupthink is how trans activism keeps people entrenched. No debate, anything that isn't immediately and entirely validating is simply evil, it's all black or white to them. There's no room for grey when just a little bit of poking and prodding can make your entire movement collapse in on itself.

I think it's quite common, I've heard it from many women, and myself included, that even after realizing the harms of gender ideology, we tend to examine ourselves and our beliefs over and over again because what if we really are evil fascists like they say we are? But every time, it turns out that no, we just care about women's rights to legal recognition and protection and equal opportunity, and patients' (especially children's) rights to responsible and ethical healthcare. Remember that when you feel you must be wrong because your opinion is currently in the minority. What's right is right, no matter how many or how few people believe it.

The other thing is, I've been watching this issue evolve for years now. I genuinely believe the tide is turning and people are seeing the misogyny inherent to this ideology. Most

In my personal life, most of my friends buy into gender ideology. A couple of them identify as nonbinary, although I'm not as close with them. It is a hard tightrope to walk. Honestly I don't get too emotionally attached, as much as I can help it, because I'm ready to lose them as friends if it comes to that. If they directly asked me my opinions I would share them, and I've always been prepared to. They never ask. I have a feeling most of them know I disagree with their views on gender but don't want to "have to" cancel/ostracize me, so the subject never comes up. Funnily enough, the friends with whom I do talk about my views openly are men. I think women, generally being socialized to care deeply about others' feelings and wellbeing, are more likely to have these feelings of guilt when going against the societally ~nice, kind, polite~ thing to do, so are more likely to stay close to the groupthink mentality of "we're good, they're bad, continue doing what we say is good and you can keep being good too". And when you see what happens socially to women who speak out against genderism, yeah it's terrifying to face that yourself.

All that to say, I get what you're feeling. It's lonely and isolating to think differently from the people around you but not feel safe to express it. Especially so for lesbians and bi women who want to date women but find that dating women now comes with the extra exhausting step of avoiding believers of gender nonsense everywhere you turn. But you are far, FAR from the only one. There are a ton of other women in your situation, they're looking for women like you. Don't give up. It's hard but it's worth it. I don't have experience with it myself, but I know of quite a few women who met on tumblr and ended up in long term irl relationships. There are also quite a few rad-related discord groups, some specifically for lesbians as well. Seriously, tumblr has become a great resource for connecting with other feminists. And even offline, there are far more women around you who think like you but are also too afraid of the backlash to speak out. Keep looking, don't give up.

#ask #i'll rb a pertinent drawing for you

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avesblues2 · 2 years

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Why are people growing afraid of hospitals for birth? I just don't understand because I feel like that's a slanted statistic. Women who have multiples, in premature labor, or require c-section or other high risk pregnancy, they do not have home births on purpose usually. so then you'll only think that means babies are being born healthier at home, but it's because they're low risk pregnancies to begin with.

Because hospitals treat birth like a medical emergency instead of natural, biological process. Most women do not need a c-section. Most births are NOT high risk and some women are even falsely labeled as high risk because of outdated practices and ideologies "pelvis too small" or breech birth. I think breech birth is actually a great example of this new phenomenon of treating birth like a medical emergency. Breech deliverers are NOT a valid reason for a c-section unless baby or mom are in absolute, 100% danger!! The only reason doctors push a c-section is because of money (you should see how much hospitals make from c-sections) and because if something does happen in delivery they are liable. But many midwives will deliver in breech just like any normal birth! Before 2000 breech deliveries weren’t seen as a reason for medical interventions and were actually NORMAL. In 2000 a Term Breech Trial Study showed poor outcomes for vaginal breech births compared to C-sections. Multiple studies came out afterward that proved the study to be flawed or invalid, but it was too late to make a difference. The American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology had stopped teaching breech deliveries because of this single, biased study and because of profit but almost all midwives are trained to do breech! Another example would be due dates. Hospitals or doctors would label a woman high risk because she's over her due date or past 40 weeks. Inductions carry MORE risk for baby and mom than going over your due date, which due dates aren't even accurate to begin with. I could go on but hospitals, for a low risk mother, are not safer due to the exploitation that occurs. Here's some more minimal examples. Almost all hospitals don't allow you to eat while in labor despite studies showing it's actually good and beneficial for mom to eat whatever she likes to help her energy levels during delivery, women should get the choice. Many hospitals don't allow women to walk around or be in different positions despite walking and go on a yoga ball helping contractions and move along the labor. Nurses fear monger women when they have been in labor "too long" to get induced even if everything is medically fine. Hospitals want a profit from you, the more interventions the higher the bill. Also, your statement near the end doesn't make much sense lol.

#asks

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burr-ell · 1 year

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If you're still doing to the choose violence ask game, 8 and 13 for critical role

choose violence ask game

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

Well for one thing, as I alluded to in a previous ask, I don't tend to recommend quite as strongly against watching the Orion Acaba episodes of C1 as a lot of people do, both because I think they've got some really good moments and because I think people sometimes need to get some perspective on what this table being upset with a player actually looks like.

Other than that? I think that—particularly on this side of the fandom—there's a general aversion to even hinting that you don't like Marisha's characters very much. And I completely understand why, but I think it's worth pointing out that it's not 2018 anymore. Campaign 1 has been over for five and a half years. Bowlgate happened before Mollymauk even died, and both of those things happened before many current fans started watching the show in the first place. There is a wide gulf between misogynistic harassment and just not really vibing with someone's narrative choices, and there's an even wider gulf between misogynistic harassment and pointing out a character's flaws to engage with them.

Now of course there is absolutely still misogyny in this fandom and I think we should still be telling people to cut that shit out, but Marisha Ray is an adult woman in her 30's and does not need to be obsessively defended from any and all mildly non-positive commentary. She does not need to be exalted above everyone else and treated like neither she nor her characters can do anything wrong. I honestly don't get how you can do that, even tongue-in-cheek, and not think you're doing her a disservice.

13. worst blorbofication

Ashton. I think a lot of people have really chosen only to pay attention to those moments where Ashton is dispensing wisdom and are ignoring the multiple statements by Taliesin that Ashton's not doing okay, at all. They're not trying to compartmentalize or internalize what they're going through, but just because they're open about what's wrong with them doesn't mean they're not dealing with their issues poorly. Transparency is not the soul of healthiness.

One of the most interesting things to me about Taliesin's characters is that—with the exception of Percy and Molly, apparently, provided you get them both some weed, as well as Kingsley and Caduceus—they'd all hate each other, and all of them probably with legitimate reasons. We see that in Ashton's argument with Percy (where both of them had valid points on the issue no I will not hear otherwise), but I also have to raise my eyebrows at the assertion that Ashton would get along with Caduceus. Because you can't tell me that Caduceus's tendency to treat people like projects wouldn't immediately clash with Ashton's stubborn refusal to be saved, and as others have pointed out, Caduceus "pain doesn't make people" Clay would probably end up seriously pissing off Ashton "there is strength, but there is pain" Greymoore. (They'd also definitely try to pulverize Molly.)

I dunno man, Ashton really gets flattened a lot, and it isn't escaping my notice that fandom opinion of them tends to change purely based on whether or not they're supporting Blorbo or Ship. Which is a damn shame, because Ashton's probably one of the most interesting characters in the party.

#cr discourse #asks #choose violence ask meme

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soracities · 9 months

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Hey not to drag this out any longer—but its interesting to see the makeup conversation from both sides. Saying this as someone who enjoys and appreciates makeup, and understands its many pitfalls and problems. People have probably said this, but I think you can understand both sides without bashing the other. Both are valid and both are worth talking about. You can love makeup but also understand why other women don't want to wear it and have their issues with it and vice versa. That its not an attack on you personally. I deeply understand people having a problem with separating that tho–we are only human. But I think we should strive for it regardless. Idk if this is really connected but I think some of the strong reaction from the women who enjoy makeup comes from the era (eras???) of ladies who were made to feel ashamed or belittled for being a 'girl' or a 'woman' growing up by guys (ESPECIALLY grown men). I swear, look back on it, there was a time where being feminine was very much being ridiculed in media and being the 'not-like-other-girls' girl was upheld. So this resulted in these girls growing up to realize how awful that time was and are now 'reclaiming' being feminine and not ashamed. I'm not saying this explains ALL of the makeup women's reactions but I feel some in my gen were definitely connected to that 'era' (think bratz vs barbie). But as a result, any pushback towards that is seen as a flashback to that ridicule and they don't want that shaming to return, instead of seeing it as an important convo to have. I feel like they aren't seeing the negatives (ones you have said)—like expecting 'tomboys' and non-feminine people to suddenly 'wake up' and not be ashamed of being a woman anymore or that those people presenting that way is somehow an attack on feminine women or them saying that feminine women should feel bad about themselves. Even if that 'era' (again idk if eras, women have always been clowned on) happened to a gen of women, society has ALWAYS favored the feminine women. Yes feminine ladies are made fun of, but non-feminine women have it hard from ALL sides. We need to have these conversations and stand united. All of us are valid and none of us should expect the other to perform (especially in favor of society and beauty standards).

Amjsnsjsjsjdj SORRY FOR THE LONG RANT. Just wanted to add some thoughts ;-; (sorry if this was nonsensical)

No, I actually think you have a point because I do agree with you regarding that "generation" (it does feel weird to call it that because it wasn't even that long ago): I think a lot of 2014-16 online feminism (what became mainstream, at least) was built precisely on that--the "eyeliner sharp enough to kill a man" era--and it was the first introduction to feminism that I had. As someone who was a "not like other girls" girl I probably would have stayed that way if all that discourse hadn't given me the vocabulary and framework I needed to understand why I felt such an obligation to separate myself from the things "other girls" liked (Ugg boots, Twilight etc).

And to be fair, the premise behind that reclamation, given the context it arose in, makes sense--it was a deliberate pushback against this incredibly narrow, hypocritical, and reductive view of what a woman "could" be: beautiful or intelligent, but absolutely not both. Attempting to dismantle that dichotomy was desperately needed, and I think it was important for a lot of girls to realise they weren't doomed to choose one or the other, but I think it's interesting because dismantling it by saying "actually, you can be both" leaves those two categories intact without really questioning what we mean by them. "You can be intelligent and beautiful", implies, in a subtle and roundabout way maybe, that beauty should still be an aspiration.

And I think it's this last thing that's probably come back to haunt us and is one of the (many) reasons we've ended up where we are. I think it's inevitable that this conversation regarding makeup and "feminity" evolved in the way it did because it happened within a societal framework that is deeply individualistic and only became even more so as social media expanded--by affirming women's agency in telling them, "you can choose who you are and what you want to be" (a necessary and important message) in a society where freedom is defined by individual choices, but not collective rights (and therefore responsibilities) means that you can, so easily, make that agency fit into already established and oppressive structures, without actually risking those structures and therefore maintaining their perceived legitimacy. And after a certain point we end up conflating the two in such a way that you are unable to criticize the structures without being seen to criticize women--because, like you said, it's something that's really difficult for some to separate.

I'm not denigrating this pushback or saying it was wrong to try and make girls feel less ashamed, but I think we have so easily missed the actual root of that movement, if you really get down to it, which was, more than anything, about denying the idea that women can, or should, be pigeonholed into arbitrary roles and live their lives confined by other people's warped ideas of who they can and cannot be. But I think the fact that we never fully questioned beauty as an aspiration in the "beauty and brains" equation legitimized it as a goal in a way and allowed a certain expression feminism to become as mainstream as it did because, ultimately, if it did not threaten beauty as a construct, then it could be tamed or made more palatable (and which is partly why, I think, that we have all this "divine feminine", "feminine energy" nonsense coming back)--certain rights have improved, true, and there has been more conversation regarding gender and women's marginalisation as a whole, which is so important--but by maintaining beauty as a standard we are also maintaining other forms of pigeonholing (and therefore marginalising) women because beauty is reductive too: if a perceived notion of "Beauty" is legitimised and valued, then we legitimise a structure where people who don't qualify as "beautiful" are actively devalued (and this plays into the added discrimination and dehumanization disabled women, women of colour, older women, and trans women are subjected to).

So, yes, what you said absolutely makes sense to me because I really do think that did play a part and it's something I can completely understand. I just wish (like so much else) that our manner of talking about these things was more open-ended and not so individualistic and insular, that we could approach them with the expectation of learning something new instead of coming from a defensive position--which truly shows, I think, that there still is a lot of shame attached to these things and that has never been fully explored or discussed properly: and that's proof of just how much we actually need to keep trying to have these conversation (even if every other tiktok trend is trying to set us back another 50 years).

#also please don't apologise for the rant i aprreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts anon <3 #ask #anonymous

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triple-a-aro · 3 months

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thanks for turning on anon asks!! i dont want to get this linked back to my actual account where i try to keep things pretty discourse-free. what i wanted to say is that i really get where yr coming from with the falling into transmasc vs transfem thing??? i find myself going oh no thats a trans woman so shes not gonna like me a lot and then i feel really guilty abt it so its good to know that other transandro bloggers are aware of that whole thing. how do you keep yrself from falling into those thinking patterns?

No problem at all, anon! I understand that this can be a topic that you don't necessarily want. attention. on you. Perfectly valid to keep yourself safe.

This touches on something that I've been realizing more often for myself, though! When you are educating yourself on topics such as transandrophobia, the loud and vocal minority of transandrophobes are likely to speak up in comments and replies of posts doing so, which makes it seem like they're everywhere. Much like vocal transphobes, we must remember that this is a minority; most people may not have even heard of transandrophobia, but I'm sure they'd agree that "trans men experience oppression for being trans men that other trans people don't experience". Because that's common sense.

The other reason I find myself falling into that pattern is the centering of trans women in these transandrophobia discussions. A lot of it ends up with people arguing if transmisogyny is worse or not, and I think that misses the entire point. But if you see these transandrophobes going on and on about trans women having it worse (and some of those people being trans women themselves who are lashing out for whichever reason), you're going to start connecting transandrophobia and trans women.

Which sucks. It really fucking does. The brain is equipped to notice patterns, and it's going to emphasize in accordance to how transandrophobes emphasize.

So how do I personally stop this from happening?

I follow trans women. Feels like a no-brainer, right? But recently I realized I was not following any trans education that was run by trans women, mostly because I had been scared of researching into the blogs themselves in case I found bigotry towards trans men, and I am not in the business of digital self-harm. If anyone has any good blogs feel free to drop them here, and I'll reblog!

If I feel myself getting incensed, I step back If you find yourself getting really mad, step back and ask yourself: - Where is this anger coming from? (At transphobia or has it been construed somehow?) - Where is this anger directed? (At transandrophobes, or at trans women?) - Who has posted this? (TERF psyops do exist, and if a blog is posting inflammatory content, they might be baiting you) - Is this user in the same circle as other transandrophobes? (There was a ring of particularly nasty transandrophobes that I blocked for mocking trans men and suggesting corrective sexual assault, and I have not found as many since)

Go to irl queer spaces. While this is not going to be a solution for everyone, I find stepping offline and talking to irl trans women is beneficial. Make friends with trans people! This discourse is so terminally online, and the only reason I participate in it is because I do what I can irl and therefore my only contribution is not arguing over discourse.

I also interact with other trans men who are normal about trans women as well. I hope this helps! Media literacy is good to practice, and I'm proud of you for owning up to something very hard, anon.

If we have any other suggestions, pop 'em down in the replies or reblogs!

#ask #anon #transandrophobia #transmisogyny #<- because the constant martyring of trans women the way that transandrophobes do it is. exactly that #transphobia

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thatlittleegyptologist · 1 year

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Hello. If you don't mind, I have a question that runs kinda parallel to the whole Egyptian curse discourse you've been suffering lately.

Tw: discussion of religious intrusive thoughts.

A while ago I was reading about modern Hellenistic worship and there was a bit about how serious it was to commit yourself to a certain deity, what a big decision it was and how for many deities it was a lifelong choice, but that that commitment didn't necessitate a ritual if the practitioner didn't feel called to one. My intrusive thoughts immediately started pledging themselves eternally to a wide variety of Greek deities (mainly the ones I would least like to associate myself with) and although I don't believe in those deities the idea that I might accidentally pledge myself to a power beyond my understanding was a tad distressing.

So today I'm exploring a new archeology YouTube channel and the host has a video about getting a replica of the oldest tattoo ever found on a mummy and my immediate gut reaction, based solely off of the thumbnail, was "but what if you accidentally pledged yourself to something you wouldn't want to be tied to?”

And then I thought of the mummy's curse discourse and I wondered how this reaction of mine fits with that orientalist idea. I want to believe the reactions are different, that mine is more about an acknowledgement of the potential for any supernatural belief to have validity and therefore not fucking around unless you are very sure you want to find out, but I have self serving reasons to want to believe that and so hoped to get the outside perspective of someone who knows a lot more than I do on this subject.

Thanks in advance and hope you're having a groovy day.

Your reaction wasn’t “oh ewww a curse” or “put it back you’ll get cursed” but “what if I pledged myself to a deity by tattooing something on me?” which is entirely different. What that speaks to is a concern not to be overstepping boundaries and thinking about whether it is right for you to do something that might have cultural implications. This is fine! You’re not immediately associating having the tattoo with being cursed, but instead asking if what you’re doing has religious implications.

With the person getting the tattoo? That’s up to them and their choice to get it. I know several Egyptologists who have tattoos of hieroglyphs, including replica placements of ones found on mummies. These people can read hieroglyphs, and they understand what the signs represent. Some of them may have deeper meanings that were not aware of yet, (I have an article on some tattoos on a woman from Deir el Medina if you’re interested) but I’m not aware of any tradition in Egypt, especially at the time the woman lived, where a tattoo would pledge you to a god. Egyptian religion doesn’t work like that. Even if one did, the person would have to believe in the Egyptian gods for it to have any meaning. Meaning lies with the owner of the tattoo. If they say it means something then it means that thing. If they say it means nothing and is just a picture then that’s what it is. It’s about agency and intent.

Egyptian religion works by people understanding the intent behind certain motifs and symbols (because people can’t read). If the intent doesn’t match then the Egyptian belief that heka can work through images will not work. So basically, if the intent of the original tattoo was a protection of Thoth (baboon symbol), then it’s a protection of Thoth for the deceased who has it. If the researcher intends to get a replica of the tattoo of Thoth just for fun, then the intent is “for fun” and heka cannot work.

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moldybonessmell · 8 months

Text

Okay, but can we talk about this one Christmas scene in BBC Sherlock S2E2?

Let's take a look at this one dialog that occured when John needs to stay with Sherlock to comfort him after Irene's death and his girlfriend is upset:

"You're a great boyfriend!" "Okay, that's good. I mean, I always thought I was great-" "And Sherlock Holmes is a very lucky man." "Oh, Jeanette please"

John has his priorities and it's very obvious to everyone involved (even tho I do think that staying with your best friend after the death of a person who was important to him is a valid reason to miss a celebration) I suppose it just was the last straw for her

"No, I mean it. It's heartwarming. You'll do anything for him. And he can't even tell your girlfriends apart!"

The fact that John's love is so unconditional he doesn't even care if Sherlock returns it reminds me so much of this one episode of Doctor Who where River Song compared loving Doctor to loving sun: "You don't expect the sun to love you back!" or something like this, I don't remember the quote and it breaks my heart so much.

(Yes I did a wholock reference, what are you gonna do about it?)

And I also see here how much he tries to move on knowing that sun will not love him back but he just can't.

"No, I'll do anything for you, just tell me what it is, I'm not doing, tell me!" "Don't make me compete with Sherlock Holmes!"

This quote is so important because even Jeanette knows and understands the entirety of the situation John's in.

Compete with Sherlock Holmes is something nobody can do (all his enemies get defeated as we know) but not only villians are a threat, even loved ones will always be on a second place for John. The first place is forever taken by this one nerd not knowing the Earth is moving around the Sun (even tho he's the sun himself).

"I'll walk your dog for you. There, I've said it now, I'll even walk your dog." "I don't have a dog!" "No, because that was the last one- Okay."

Even John himself admits his defeat and realises what he got himself into.

(He did marry Mary eventually, and even tho I love her character, I can't help but see her being another one of "escapes" for John.)

Please don't witchhunt me for "hating on straight ships" or whatever, complain at the directors and writers who made John so unbearably closeted any other of his ships just doesn't sail (pun fully intended).

All I see here is a man desperately stuck in his one-sided feelings and fear of being out, he goes through the struggle a lot of queer people experienced in their life.

Yes, it's been done many times before, but I can't help but say that the production crew are cowards for not making John canonically queer when his writing is so authentic it makes me experience almost physical pain.

Coming back to the topic of Mary btw, I think it was fucking lame in the way her destiny turned out to be. She deserved to have a good life with loving husband and a child, but writers put her in the story just to make John not so openly queer coded (bi and pan people exist btw but it's a topic for another conversation unfortunately) and they just killed her off to "sail" the johnlock ship in the end because they are cowards to actually follow through with queerbaiting (that's what the quotes for, because they haven't actually sailed it). I hate, and I mean HATE when a woman is added to a story just for a man's character development and gets killed off and BBC's Sherlock situation is exactly like this. Why even add her to the story if you don't plan on making her stay with John? The last season makes no sense and makes me so angry I often pretend it doesn't exist "BOO TOMATOES TOMATOES-" (it's the reason I don't want any new Sherlock seasons tbh)

Okay, this post is all over the place, at this point I'm more just ranting instead of doing a proper topic analysis but I hope you liked it anyway. Share your opinion if you have any, ig the Sherlock tag is too full at this point I don't really see people taking about stuff while checking the tag (saying this as if the first season didn't come out like 13 years ago)

Have a good day :)

#sherlock #bbc sherlock #sherlock bbc #sherlock holmes #sherlock fandom #john watson #johnlock #mary elizabeth watson #mary watson #wholock

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hypergamiss · 5 months

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How do I avoid becoming misogynistic as a fellow woman? In my experience, I've witnessed women throw me and other people under the bus for some of the worst men I've ever seen (a great example is Kelsey with Meg Thee Stallion vs. Tory Lanez). Do women benefit from betraying each other? I'm asking because I'm not cutthroat and weird like that, so I have a hard time wrapping my head around the reason why so many do stuff like this. I've seen women do some nasty shit to other women (ie. ghislaine Maxwell) and end up looking like a fool in the end. I see this traitor behavior happen all the time at work, socially, personally, in family, etc and it's so strange. I don't want to start hating women because of this revelation, but I'm definitely not #teamwomen anymore.

Avoid boy crazy, pick me, Bob the builder, etc types of women at all costs.

It's that simple (in my opinion). Meg is herself boy crazy so her friends are as well and it came as no surprise that her friend decided to defend Tory. That was very predictable in my book. I do not think that the women who decide to put men on a pedestal actually know that they are making things worse for other women. They think that male attention and validation matter more than being a girls girl and protecting each other. It's not your job to understand them either, just stay in your lane and avoid them because we will NEVER come to understand their behavior over here. Focus on only befriending women who have healthy boundaries, you will quickly realize that they have good morals as well. I would also suggest unfollowing all of the boy-crazy women on all platforms or you will be consumed by all of the negativity that they put out to the world. It's even hard for me to listen to their lyrics or see their posts. I can't begin to explain how refreshing it is to have a group of friends that prioritize themselves because you know they wouldn't do anything harmful to you over a man. We have a very abundant mindset, and we understand that men come and go (up until a husband, of course) to the point that losing a strong friendship hurts more than going through a breakup with a man. Some women will even physically tell you that they aren't boy crazy so you have to pay attention to their actions closely. I had a friend who I thought was on the same page as me in the past but she told me all the details about a man she was dating and I quickly realized she was lying. She completely adjusted her schedule to his needs (even calling off from work), slept with him after a week, and started mentioning marriage at week 3 right before she got dumped. This told me all I needed to know about her and this was definitely the actions of someone who would ditch you or betray you for the temporary fling they're involved with. It's just not worth it to be around them even if you think they are a really good and genuine person, they will do almost anything to please men. I've had my fair share of betrayals and it's never the women who are confident and date strategically that are involved in my experience.

#hypergamous lifestyle #heaux advice #heaux tips #heauxheauxheaux #heauxlife #hypergamy #level up #spoiled heaux #spoiled gf #high maintenance

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darlin-djarin · 8 months

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filoni owes reparations for the way he wrote sabine. girl is really supposed to be in her 30s and she acts like that? wtf?

i mean i understand your frustration and i've seen tons of arguments exactly like this that i more or less agree with, but i also don't really mind her behavior?? like i understand, she's 30, she's supposed to be more mature etc etc but also- she's 30. have yall met 30 year olds? they're not that much different. sure they're older and more "mature" but they can still act young (because they are) and brash and wild n all of that.

i've seen many people in their thirties and older twenties feeling really seen with how sabine is written. they appreciate how sabine still acts young, how she's still in the past (which i do think ties into a bigger theme of how sabine can't let go of her attachments), because often times 30 year olds are exactly that. growing up is hard yk, so staying in the past and not moving on is totally valid, especially when you take into consideration how traumatized sabine is. she has no family left, she's alone on lothal, she thinks everyone has abandoned her. i assume she acts "the same" to spite ahsoka (who abandoned her before), because we all know that ahsoka does not approve of how sabine still acts.

but what i do see is a lot of hypocrisy when it comes to comparing ahsoka and sabine's behavior because a lot of people complain about how ahsoka isn't "the same" and that she's not fun anymore and that she's bland, which i'll admit she does seem to be like that, but i assume she was written that way on purpose, at least before she met anakin in the world between worlds and realized she wanted "to live". she returned and now she seems much brighter and she smiles more and all of that. a lot of people were trying to justify ahsoka's "bland" behavior by saying "oh well she's older now and she's so much more mature and it's normal for her to not be as childish as she once was" and etc etc and i do understand that 14 years old is DRASTICALLY different than 50 years old but it's also a bit hypocritical for the same people to think it's fine for sabine to act the same way she used to and justify how ahsoka's wise behavior is perfectly reasonable as well. yk?

as for my opinion, i think they're written fine. i think it's sad how ahsoka doesn't seem to be as open as before, but ofc, ahsoka is a traumatized little fella so. yk. but i do appreciate how much more lighter and how much more she smiles after she came back from the world between worlds. it really shows how much anakin's "lesson" helped her. as for sabine, i think it's refreshing to see someone like her still act young, though i wish she would just think things through and TRY to understand what ahsoka is trying to make her see. sabine does still have an issue with attachments, but ofc, she's also a traumatized little fella so can we really blame her?

anon your argument is very valid and i understand your frustration, and i don't really want to give filoni any credit with his writing, so i am inclined to agree with you, but only to an extent. it's also a really muddy topic that many people from different walks of life can argue for. we can analyze all the different reasons why sabine would act this way, but do we have a say in how a traumatized young woman acts?? idk.

anyone can feel free to agree or disagree with me, just please be respectful and i'd love to see what other people's opinions and perspectives are.

#star wars #ahsoka #sabine wren #ahsoka tano #oil.

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