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actualbird · 4 months

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God I agree so hard with you on the afterstories. I get what they were trying to do with them as a sweet ending to take the sting off the main story but it just cheapens the story so much!! I don't feel relief when reading about how they miraculously survived, I just kind of feel frustrated because the afterstory just really doesn't earn that relief at all.

I'd have preferred if they turned the afterstory into an actual additional part of the main story detailing how the boys survived because at least then it'd have a better chance of landing since it's more developed than just "oh yeah don't worry about it I got out fine :)". Or if they really wanted to keep it an afterstory...I don't know, maybe a reunite in the afterlife thing? It's also cliche but at least it doesn't cheapen the story as much by magically undoing the tragedy of the story.

Of course, ideally they'd stick to their guns and just end the story where it's supposed to end without any afterstory. Maybe I could understand the need for a fluffier epilogue for the other AU cards which could catch players not expecting angst off guard since the art doesn't give anything away but for Enduring Light's set of cards? Every single card has the boys looking badly beat up or in a bad situation for Luke, I'd be surprised if anyone pulled for the cards not expecting heavy angst.

I think in the end I just act as if the afterstories are non-canon, and considering during the secret chats some of the boys talk about their card counterparts as if they did die I think that might be what the devs intended too. I do still think the stories told in the AU cards are generally good from what little I've read, I just wish they'd commit that tiny bit more to telling a tragedy when they want to.

🌌

irt my thoughts on marius and luke's enduring light cards

wahhh hi hi milkyway anon!! glad im not the only one hehe cuz I AGREE WITH ALL THIS

the thing i most most agree with is if they took the "actual additional part of the main story detailing how the boys survived" approach to the afterstory, i wouldve Loved that. for luke's in particular his recovery seems like suCH AN INTERESTING STORY IN ITSELF HELLO??? he was fished outta the ocean and injured so badly that his recovery took a whole year???? i wanna read that!! i wanna read about him coming to terms with his injuries (and maybe even disability because you dont get out of an Exploding Airplane Crash unscathed. in my mind he had to get a limb amputated (hi chika if youre out there reading this ask you have infected me with the "amputate luke" hc) or at the very least cannot walk for a solid period of time after the accident. oh, and ptsd of course) and how he copes with all this

all in all, my dissatisfaction with the inclusion of the afterstories in this set of cards seems to show a pattern for my dissatisfaction with other tot cards i didnt vibe with: they were all (even partly) caused by tot's dedication to the format of their cards rather than the story within it

why didnt i like ssr looming nightmare? 6 acts were not enough to flesh out mc's side of the story, given that it was her nightmare. alas, 6 acts are all we get for regular ssr cards

why didnt i like ssr orange scent? 3 acts were NOWHERE near enough space for luke to be able to get over his fears and propose to mc. alas, 3 acts is all we get for anniv ssr cards

why didnt i like this bit of ssr sky ashes? because the existence of the afterstory undermines the tragedy's tragedy-ing. alas, afterstories are a staple of big event ssr cards

like.....i get that tot has to be consistent in their format for types of cards but it makes me sad to see when that consistency actively does the card story a disservice. these stories could be homeruns! if they were treated as the priority and not something to shove into a template that must be followed

anyhoo, it's nice to see im not the only one w iffy feelings abt the afterstories. i still liked sky ashes and im going your route about it by mentally editing the afterstory to be a recovery story instead of a fluff fix-all

thanks for the ask!!

#why dont i like the post anniv personal stories as much as pre-anniv? beCAUSE THE FORMAT DOESNT ALLOW SPACE FOR THE STORY TO #BECOME OVER-ARCHING!!!! TOT UR FORMATS R KILLING ME #asks #milkyway!anon

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simcardiac-arrested · 5 months

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i think if my cats were in rain world - and you WILL hear about this - itd go like this:

šeldn as monk (you dont know him), zrzek as survivor (you may have heard of him), eda as hunter because she was diseased and loved to battle and kill and looked very nice and was sorta touch averse but would cuddle up to you if you were feeling bad - you may know her. thats the main three. now onto downpour

dolochov would, of course, take on the role of gourmand. in a world where fousek, niče, and dolochov coexisted at the same time, dolochov was monk (fousek survivor, niče hunter), due to her kind nature. shes very cuddly and such... but shes also very strong! i call her dumb a lot, and, she is, but if someone knew how to craft a neuron, it'd be her.

only arthur and fousek left now. arthur, i think, could take on the role of rivulet. hes SO chatty. when he was in the tub i turned the water on and didnt even care. tho i call him dumb also, and he is, hes actually very smart! hes not afraid to get a bit violent, too. he's kind also, so i think he'd help moon..

he could,. also, i think, take on the role of spearmaster, for the same reasons as listed above. also that he lvoes to battle and play and is very strong... and a freak... hm.. yes, i change my verdict. arthur would go spearmaster mode. not rivulet.

now. artificer, rivulet, and saint left. its obvious fousek will take on saint, yes? fousek's just like.. a guy!! hes just a dudeee hes just a silly guy. if anyone was gonna void the worm it'd be him. ive actually made an rw style fousek drawing before!:) if not saint, he'd be nightcat.

so, artificer and rivulet, huh? who those? well i think any ofmy friend arc's freaks beasts weirdos could take on rivulet's role. they could also be slugpup... yes, mari could be artificer. she's violent like that. the pups? sunny and basil. yes... shes the scary guy

now, rivulet, huh... ithink.. . umm.. well im sad i didnt get to include saff:( sorry saff. but shes not as fast as that slug... she should get to be in the rot... ummm.. help help help... niče also i think. she could be rivuletr. sher s smartlike that. dear god help me!! turning to my friend mikey.ok. mikey turned to

you just got absolutely sluggedddd ... i think about this a lot. i think saff would make a good mn YESS WAIT HOLD ON

SAFF AS MONK!!!! and snce zrzek is survivor... omggggg... dudee.e... !!!! saff in rain world realll i think ive put her there once or twice... teehee... ok... you just got sluggeddd to smithereens

eating my breakfast and reading this ask like the morning newspaper

#ths is just like kafka’s diaries if he was obsessed with cats instead of bugs #(i dont know anything about kafka)#cramswering

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iheartchv · 2 years

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Hey Can You Do A Vampire Raph x F!Reader But In Bayverse And With Prompts And Do A Lemon For It Too

123. “Don’t hold back.” 89. Mating season 58. Turtle bedroom 5. “MINE.” 151. “Do you know how a turtle takes his mate?” 96. Making out 142. “Bite me.” 112. Biting/marking 132. “Argue all you want, we both know you belong to me.” 95. Gentle sex and Turning into a vampire

Im sorry for it being short and messy, i ran out of time and didnt think id be busy during my vacation >×<

Prompts (c) @turtle-babe83

18+ content below; Raph x Reader are over 18. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! ⚠️

"What's he got that I dont?"

"Nothing, Raph. He just needed some help-"

"Ya didnt see the way he was flirting wit ya. I read his mind, he wanted to put the moves on you." He was silent for a second. "Besides, you're MINE !" he growled. He watched from the sewer drain, making sure no one was going to harm you.

"You dont have to get all territorial. I dont belong to anyone, not even you."

The two of you bickered and argued. There was no way of getting through Raph's bull headedness. He leaned his face toward you, staring into your eyes and smirked,"Argue all you want, we both know you belong to me. You can't hide those dirty thoughts about me when I'm working out, the way you fantasize about me being on top of you-"

"Shut up!" You yelled and turned around to go home. Your whole face was burning with embaressment. Before you disappeared out of sight you heard him let out a chuckle.

That was months ago. You and Raphael had been dating for a while. It had been just so amazing dating the red brute. He might have been a big tough guy, but you got to see the soft gentle giant underneath, as well. However during one week in spring, you hadn't seen him or talked to him because he wouldnt answer his cell phone. You were worried about him but Splinter and his brothers assured you he was fine. Afterward you were told by Donnie about his behavior and about that certain time of year where anything could go wrong if not too careful.

》 ---------------------- 《

"You know you can always tell me, if there's something up or whatever. I'm here for you, Raph." Y/N had told him. "Your happiness is also my happiness." Raphael didn't want to, but this was getting to be too much. He barely managed to get through his last heat cycle during the spring. He already had sex with her, claimed her as his, but he wanted to claim her and make her his... forever...

One cool October night, your cell phone vibrated telling you that you had a message. You opened the text and saw that it was from Raph. It read:

Can u come over? I need u

You replied:

I'm coming over are you alright?

I will be...

Usually Raph would be a bit flirty when texting so you knew something was up. You jumped out of bed, put on some comfy clothes and a light jacket, and then you made your way to one of the secret manhole covers that led down to the sewers and to the turtles lair.

You made a beeline towards Raphael's room. You hurried to him when you saw him with his face buried in his hands, his knees supporting his arms. "Baby, are you alright?" Your heart pounded in anticipation, wanting to know what he needed.

He looked up at you and responded,"Not right now..."

"What is it?"

He sighed and explained that it was mating season again. "I won't be gentle and self controlled like the usual when it comes to... that..."

"Okay, I can handle that." You shrugged your shoulders.

"Do you know how a turtle takes his mate?"

"I've watched Discovery Channel. I have an idea."

He gently chuckled. "That's not the real problem..."

"What is then?"

It was silent for a moment. "Look, besides me being a mutant, I'm a vampire and you're not"

"I told you before, I don't care about all of that."

"What about 60, 70 years from now?"

You haven't thought about that far into the future. Vampires live forever if they hide really well from the world. Humans however are limited in the game of life. You however had wondered what it'd be like to be a creature of the night; you've never had this bond with anyone that you have with Raphael and you didnt want it to end.

Raph sighed again, feeling sexually frustrated. "I'm sorry. I just... What I'm trying to say is... I want you to be mine forever."

Your hands cupped his jawline. "I am. I'm yours forever and always. Bite me."

His eyes were like saucers but softened when his fingers went to tangle in your soft hair. "Are you sure? It ain't reversible... it'll be permanent..." Donnie hadn't been able to find the cure for vampirism.

"I'm sure. I can just switch to the night shift, or I'll think of something." Your smile turned into a soft kiss silencing him. "Please, Raph, make me yours."

"And you're positive?"

You giggled. "Yes, yes, I'm sure. I'm not a delicate little lady. Don't hold back."

You sat yourself in his lap, pulled on the mask tails and pulled him to you. With a moan you pressed your lips into his, urging him to start kissing you. His hands gropped your backside as his mouth devoured yours, his tongue tasting and exploring you. Your clothes were soon stripped off, and his tongue continued its way down to your damp arousal.

He drapped your legs over his shoulders and he nipped your inner thighs before he dove right in to taste your wetness. Squeals and mewls echoed off the walls and your hands clawed at something to hold onto as Raph's mouth pleasured you. Feeling his tongue thrust in and out made your hips buck up. "Raaaaaph~" you whined.

He was already hard, but was it possible to be harder than this? Hearing your gasps and moans turned him on so much. He could hear your heart thundering in his ears (or was it his?). He knew your blood was rushing hot through your body. His throat felt dry at the thought of drinking your blood while you moaned in ecstasy.

"Y/N, baby, you taste so good. I bet your blood will taste even sweeter" he growled as his tongue flicked your sensitive bud and his hands played with your breasts, teasing your nipples to hardened peaks. His shorts felt so uncomfortable that he had to lay you down on the bed to take them off. He spread your thighs apart and began to pleasure you again.

Before you knew it you approached your climax, crying out as your back arched and your eyes rolled in the back of your head. Your hands latched onto his head as your orgasm shook you to your very core. "Oh, Raphael~ Yes~" you gasped. Once you had finally come down from your high, you spied the green monster of a cock standing, waiting for you. You licked your lips as you tried to get air back into your lungs.

He let you taste yourself on his lips and then nipped and bit your neck for a bit. "Just a minute, babe." Raph came back with some lube. Even though you were already so wet he wanted to take precautions. He didnt want to hurt you during the mating ritual. He coated his finger with it and swirled it around, trying to coat your insides, and then he lubed up his thick member, mixing it with the precum on the tip. He lined himself up with your entrance, spreading you wide as possible as he nestled himself between your legs (you were going to be bruised with how tight he held you).

"Ready?" he panted.

You wiggled your hips. "Yes~ Remember, don't hold back."

Slowly, but oh so smooth like butter, he slid inside you. He loved seeing how he stretched you, how your tight dripping sex swallowed him. He hissed and groaned as if feeling your heat surrounding him was his first time again; you always managed to take his breath away. He was finding a rhythm to follow, and started rocking his hips into yours.

Your body writhed as wave after wave of pleasure washed over you again. "Raph~" you whimpered as he brushed along your gspot. He even managed to find another spot you didn't know existed before.

"Does that feel good, sweetheart?"

"Mhmmm, mhmmm~"

He kept at this pace until you told him to go deeper. Pushing your legs up to your chest he started pounding into your cervix. Your moans grew louder. Surely everyone could've heard but you didn't care at the moment.

"H-harder, faster, Raph. Please~" you whined. You were so close. You felt like exploding and releasing all this pent up frustration.

Your wish was his command. He slammed his hips into your backside, skin slapping and other lewd noises being the only thing that filled the room. Your throat was going to be sore from how loud you cried out in bliss. "Yes, Raphael, f*** me~" you cried.

When you were close he buried his face in the crook of your shoulder as he moaned loudly. "Make us cum, y/n. Make us both cum, babygirl." he panted. The knot in your lower stomach unraveled and you screamed, making noises that you never made before. As he reached his climax his fangs sunk into your neck, drawing forth your life essence, his growls and cries muffled as his mouth made sure to not waste a drop of blood.

You felt ropes of hot cum fill you you could fill some seep out. You cummed so hard you blacked out. When you woke up, you were in his Raphael's strong arms. You groaned as you felt your body start to ache. "What happened?"

"You're awake. Thank gods, I thought I lost you." He littered your face with kisses. "Are you okay? I know you're sore but are you..."

"I guess. But I feel thirsty." Your throat was dry. He exposed his neck and cradled your head under it. "Go on" he urged you. You gently pierced his skin and felt the warm blood on your tongue. He pulled you away before you could drain him dry.

"So it's forever, literally "

"However long that may be"

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2016 #tmnt 2014 #smut #lemon #raph #vampire raphael #raphael #raphxreader #ask #request #xreader

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yuukei-yikes · 10 months

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hie I've just been sitting here thinking about harutaka fighting I know the whole "I knew i was gonna die and didn't tell you" is prime material for them to fight But I like to think about like Long term how they deal with little inevitable conflicts Bc those are gonna happen when you wanna spend your life by someone's side I feel like Haruka's reaction is most often just To immediately apologize He wants to fix things He doesn't want anyone to be upset So he slaps a bandaid over it! Takane however Needs to experience her feelings even if they suck She needs to get mad She needs to get sad (and try to cover up that sadness with angry outburts) I think there's times Haruka apologizes to try and soothe a conflict and she gets upset because it's really not his fault and she wishes he'd get mad instead! I think eventually they kinda learn Takane needs her moment to run through her feelings and just because she's crying screaming punching a pillow doesn't mean it's personal And Haruka needs to learn that sometimes it's okay if things feel bad for a bit, it's better to talk things through than to bury them under panicked pacification. A tense afternoon isn't going to undo their pile of happy memories. Honestly I wanna see Haruka try to get mad about something. Restaurant got his order wrong or something. And Takane's just there like yeah!! Tell them!!! And he immediately deflates when he has their attention (also if this characterization is a little off I apologize!! I hadn't touched kagepro in a while and have just recently gotten sucked back into the hyperfixation but haven't freshly gone through all the material yet. I'm slowly making my way through it again I just really enjoy your blog asjshffj)

YEAH EXACTLY U GET IT SO WELL especially with takane wishing haruka would get mad. they run through emotions differently, takane gets mad/explodes because she cares about something so much, so haruka not matching her energy when she gets like that makes her feel like he doesn't care.

i think that could be a good way for them to learn how things work, like if takane told him its like you dont even care and haruka had the chance to say OF COURSE he cares. how could he not???!!!

so when she's blowing up about something admittedly silly and haruka isnt telling her Hey that's silly and instead he's like ok❤️sorry❤️dont be mad❤️ that makes her madder. but haruka is also capable of getting angry yknow (NOVEL 6 KANO MOMENT) (Still so funny kano is the 1 character that managed to make haruka angry) but i have a hard time seeing him angry At takane. maybe he could call her immature or something lol....

i think he could ask her to stop being such a tease??? haruka's too spineless to ask her to stop teasing him (over the dimension lost days I moment) but by post str i dont think this would be a problem. maybe he could manage to ask and takane would be like AWWWW IM JUST GOOFING cuz from his pov in lost days it REALLY seemed like haruka didnt realise takane was fucking with him. personally i didnt notice in my first read. once i read it again i noticed takane is described to have a mischievous smile and stuff and that just changed the whole context. it was haruka moaning and crying abt having an art block and takane being like girl ur being pathetic and she was right🙏

i mostly have a hard time imagining What theyd fight about. i think they could have arguments but it'd have to be something punctual for that to take place. i dont think couples just Have to argue to work out at all. that bit u said abt "thats gonna happen when u wanna spend ur life with someone" LIKE yeah there are disagreements and all but nothing that could cause An Argument of that nature yknow.

that's why haruka not telling takane abt his condition is like the best potential for it, otherwise more domestic stuff is like. haruka wanting the lights on while playing a horror game and takane wanting them off. thats like the most heated dispute they can have bc theyre both very serious about their stances💔(haruka is scared. takane wants the full horror game experience🙄)

#ask tag #headcanons #harutaka

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tea-and-secrets · 1 year

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I ghosted a very good friend for no other reason than just "mental health was messed up"

I didnt have the energy to reply to her message one day. So I didnt open her messages. I kept saying id do it tomorrow. Days turned into weeks and months and suddenly years. Havent spoken to her since 2019 now. At one ppint it began feeling like it was too late, so, we just. Dont talk anymore. She never reached out again either (i dont blame her) so i felt like she'd moved on

Sometimes i think of reaching out but God we'd be just strangers now. We're not even in the fandom where we met anymore. I also think it'd suck if shes hurt or mad so i dont wanna open any wounds. Its best to move on. Im just so fuckinv angry i let myself lose such a good friendship.

Ik you dont know its me, but if you read this, i just want to say, im sorry. Im so, so fucking sorry. I never meant to do this to you and not a day goes by that i dont think of you. I miss seing you get sleepy in skype calls. I miss seeing your art before anyone else. I miss tagging you in our 'lizzie team' posts. I miss our inside jokes, and i still remember them.

I hope yoire thriving, and I hope yoire doing well, and that youve met friends who love and appreciate you like i should have. I feel like i didnt deserve yoir friendship and maybe i sabotaged it. Idk. Im not excusing myself, i just wish i could explain it. It was nothing you did, i promise. Im sorry for abandoning yoi, and im sorry the only way i can say this is by sending an anon to a blog that youll probably never even see

I love you, always will. Thank you for everything you did. Im not asking you to forgive me. I just need to say it, I'm sorry.

#long post

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dear-tumby · 1 year

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just got out of a manic episode lol

yeah so im depressed now, no longer depresion haha funnys more like depresion no hahas and im pretty sure im scaring off my boyfriend so yeah, he stopped talking/hanging out with me when i was being honest about my feelings, like i was there when he relasped but i start talking my crazy shit and then suddenly mental illness is off the table??? whatever its not even like i like him or nothing like that. i dont understand why i do this to myself, this is just turning into a rant but ive been holding this down for so long it feels good to scream it out into the void that is tumblr yk? also like i drew on cut marks because it hurts less plus i can just wash that off, yk i do that a lot i put on makeup that made me look like i commeted suicide bc i was sad and suicidle(who would have gussed???) plus i just found this collage i really want to go to but no one belives i can do it and i act like that makes me wanna do it more but really it just shows how much people belive imma be a no body and im so scared im going to be suck here forever like my mom and dad. why does life have to be such a bitch like why do i always gotta screw up everything???? lke i have two boyfriends that care about me yet i want to date this girl thats never gonna love me back?? and when i say love i mean i actually love her so much and i cant talk about it because shell find out that im totally in love with her and shell flip out and distance herself from me and i need her shes my everything and if i don't have her in my life even just as a friend i think i need to switch schools again because that's what i always do, when shit gets rough go and hide because i cant handle all this shit and my parents are finally in a good place (mentally) and im gonna screw it up for them because ill stress them out by ignoring everyone and sleeping through meals and holidays and they'll yell at me because they don't understand and i don't blame them im a mess filled with self pity and gross tindencys so i cant have anyone love me truly because im so gross and i just want the felling of everything to stop, like i want to be so fucking happy that everyone thinks on on drugs, which i was on anti anxiety pills but then i felt nothing so i cut myself bu my dumbass was wearing white pants and my mom found out and yelled at me, and screamed and woke everyone up and my sibling still reminds me about it and every time he does i want to hold him down and beat the shit out of him, like does he even take my mental illness serously, does anyone??? are my parents just pretending to give a shit, at least my mom is, my dad cares for me but he just never says the right things, and i forgive him but i just want nothing to go wrong for once i just want everyone to stop. stop talking to me, stop trying to help but also ignoring my despreat cries for help doesn't make me feel any better and also i don't want to be lied toi want the truth even if it would hurt me yk? i don't know what i want, but i know it'd make me feel safe and happy and no long like everyone's trying to get me, i just want to have someone who'd look at all different sides of me and go "wow their awesome, and sure they do stuff i disagree with but there a good person who's gonna make it big and ill stand with them through thick and thin and its okay they have issues we all do and love every flaw" like im sure my boyfriend would say this but i don't want him to say it i want it shown i want to see and trust i can tell them anything and they'd stick around.

tldr: i was origanally posting this so everyone would know i didnt commet suicide but then it turned into a rant so, yah sorry, uh i read a really good south park fanfic so thats something good that happened, though it reminded me alot of me and me is my enemy rn so i was really angry but in a healthy good way, also thought my dad died but thats justsum good ol paranoia also sorry for all the typos, did ths on my computer at like 11:55 so im kinda half asleep

#tw vent #tw self destructive behavior #vent #but like #i missed tumblr #relationship problems?#im the problem #yipeeee #um #idk what tags to use #sh mention #$elf h4rm #but its not bad

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terraliensvent · 16 days

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Controversial take on all this drama but both sides seem to have their issues. While yes coy has some shit to get together but there's some thoughts I have about the mods. 1. From what I'm reading, the issue is happening because coy did not want to follow the adopt schedule like the mods but I just want to know how this is major? I'm not active in the server but last time I checked coy does not post in the server so how would their adopts on Instagram affect discord? For fundraiser adopts, I can see the issue but in general I don't believe it was hurting anyone so an explanation as to the issue would be nice, an actual answer except the money grabbing claims.. 2. Why is said staff just now coming out with the dog screenshot? While it's not that old, shouldn't it have been addressed by mods when coy sent the message? It's honestly just fueling the fire but imagine if coy didn't take terraliens back. The message would have been unknown to us for so long. I'm curious if staff ever addressed this issue with coy personally because I am interested in what those messages are, if they exist. On coy's end, they need to properly address the dog issue and the statement about firing staff. It's one thing to not agree with a rule but to fire an entire staff because of it is definitely a control thing, there's no denying it. That screenshot of them considering dropping all mods after they admitted to not wanting to do staff work shows where their priorities are. Regardless of what coy say, people will hate on them so they should just apologize and leave. Fully give ownership up and disconnect themselves from terraliens for good. The dog issue, I can see how coy may overexaggerate on the smacking but the hair pulling sounds like absolute hell for any dog out there. As a dog owner, there are many ways to lure a dog out without having to touch them. You can tempt them with toys. Food is a great way to lure an animal out, as seen in many rescue videos. There's just different ways to go about getting your dog from underneath the bed. You can even move the bed carefully and pick the dog up if he does not move. I have to agree with some members when they say the announcement seems so rushed. Even if dog-piling isn't harassment, the way mods say to remain respectful yet let the server go into chaos, it's destroying whatever last hope there is to terraliens. Then when someone who had a different opinion popped up, they got banned which is interesting. If it was for aggression, where is the same energy for the others. It'd be nice to hear from both sides in a professional manner. This all seems childish from a bunch of adults. They should just make a new server if temul decides to pull through.

TL;DR: Both sides need to take a breather and address everything at once because now we're left asking questions yet getting no answers and demanding for a response. At this point, we need a doc on all this again.

from what i gather the mods just wanted some sort of warning or schedule on adopt posting, i can understand why they would want this because then they could make sure they dont have events or stuff that interferes, or other adopt batches

this i am curious about. maybe they thought it wasnt that huge of an issue or just didnt see it at all? just speculating

this ask was sent this morning before the new announcement, so i think some of the points made here are out of date, but what i will say is that after the chaos of last night i dont see any way they can come back from this

#closed species vent #terralien #closed species #terraliens #terras is over party

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littlelambdrgnfly · 4 months

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Ok since you reblogged that one post I hope you know I reread The Sum of Them for the 3rd time, maybe like a month ago, up until the last chapter and i never finished it cause i didnt want to experience it ending again (if that makes sense), i wish it never ended. I wish they could play baby games forever but its so important it does end because the ending is soo beautiful but so devastating, and it's beautiful because its so devastating, and my heart cant take experiencing that again :'-(

i already sent a message on here saying that your fic was the first fic to make me cry, possibly the first piece of LITERATURE in general to make me cry (i could be wrong but i cant remember any piece before that), and it made me cry 2 times when reading it for the first time. It is truly my favorite piece of McLennon fanfiction, but the only reason i dont fully consider it mine is that if someone were to ask me, it'd be too taboo/freaky to say but its truly one of the most heartfelt and complex ways ive ever seen anyone portray John and Paul while also feeling completely accurate and realistic. My god. And i love so many of your other fics too but The Sum of Them really means so much to me and I cant even say that enough. i wish you could just live as me and be inside my mind to fully grasp how much of an affect it had on me, I dont think i will ever be able to explain it sadly </3. But just know out of every McLennon fic ive ever read (and ive read many), THAT one is my very favorite out of like 100+. The way you characterize them is just so completely different from any other fic ive read and its so intimate and raw and holy shit i dont even have the words. Sorry i know im rambling at this point but I just think about it a lot! Also your fics are the only fics i enjoy anymore, (recent) beatles fics have gone down the drain in my opinion and yours are the only ones i can be satisfied with because, as far as im concerned, anything you write is automatically in-character for them after reading The Sum of Them lol x) thank you so SO much for writing cause it's truly exposed so many of my own desires and hidden , sensitive parts of myself that couldn't be excavated any other way without your work 💖

Dude... this is legitimately one of the best comments I've ever gotten. I wish I could memorize all of this and replay it for myself whenever I'm feeling blue. Thank you so so much, it means the world to me! I think all writers insert their own thoughts and emotions into their work, and I definitely do that in all of mine, but especially The Sum of Them. This fic is basically my wishlist of things I would do with a partner, as well as coming to better terms with my own kinks, so I'm glad it's been able to resonate with people. I'm also glad that I managed to keep John and Paul in character, even if John is crying every other paragraph lmao! I totally get what you're saying about wishing I could experience what you did, I wish I could too. Sometimes I reread my fics with the mindset of someone reading it for the first time, but it's just not the same. I'd give my left tit for more writers on my level or higher who wrote bottom!John or even ABDL fics, I swear. I don't read a lot of fics these days, but I'm usually disappointed whenever I check the Beatles tab. I'm also really really bad at remembering titles and author names, so I never remember what fics that I like! Thank God for bookmarks. I definitely understand not wanting to tell people that this is your favorite fic though, lol! I've been writing Beatles fics for a long time, but I created a new account on AO3 when I started writing these fics. I'm comfortable talking about this stuff, but only with the help of an alternate profile. I'm really really happy to help people explore this side of themselves though-- too often fics like mine are just really gross over-the-top and completely unrealistic portrayals in my opinion, and I guess I wanted to bring something sweeter and more realistic to the table. <3

#sorry if this is all over the place i'm having a migraine

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ateezgf · 3 years

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Hi I’m a new atiny and I’m excited about my first comeback with them but I had a question? Maybe it’s dumb but is there like a storyline to their MVs? I still haven’t watched all of them but I was wondering what the hourglass meant that’s all over this comeback. Anyway thank you very much, I’m sorry if this is weird

hi !! first off, welcome :D how are you liking ateez so far? any favorite boys yet? i hope all the pre-comeback activities are hyping you up!! ALSO, that isn't a dumb question i promise !! yes, they do have a storyline! it comes with a lot of theories since they won’t explicitly tell us & it also spans across A LOT of their content. like mvs, albums, lyrics, vcrs, shows, etc. i’ll put my own thoughts under the read more because it’s a lot. i also can’t explain the hourglass without telling you about their story too.

to me, the ateez storyline has pretty general themes in regards to good vs evil.. rebellion vs control.. multiverses/timelines/time travel. i’ll be going through this per era (treasure & fever) !! i’ll try to focus primarily on their mvs, but i’ll mention some things from their albums and some vcrs for their comebacks.

TREASURE ERA (EP.1-5):

pirate king/treasure mv doesn’t have too much story to it. these two mvs are mainly just introductions to them and their story. esp with the very iconic lines “will you be my friend?” and in the intro track on the album right before pirate king, “will you join us?” they sing a lot about their ambitions and the future. it’s safe to believe that this is the good ateez.

say my name is our first glance at the bad ateez (or who everyone calls halateez). in this mv, we can see that ateez are in distress. in a lot of their solo shots, they’re typically in not likable settings. yeosang is trapped in a glass box with a member of halateez staring him down. hongjoong is sat in a blue hallway with a lot of smoke. yunho is at a desk surrounded by papers & this is also where we first see the hourglass (or cromer). however, it’s just a prop for now. san is in a room surrounded by broken glass.. BUT only after he is seen staring at one of the members of halateez through it. in the big table scene, you can see them all working to find the answer to something.. which is very interesting to note that wooyoung is the only one to be seen in that room alone after an alarm seemingly makes all the other evacuate. WE ALSO get the first face-off between halateez and ateez. but they’re not directly face to face. they’re only seeing them through glass panels & we can see that ateez is very clearly defiant when it comes to them. we also see that when seonghwa is facing the halateez member alone, that it’s him. which could also showcase the time traveling aspect. as if halateez is jumping through the timelines to get to them. another interesting thing to note that in the last verse of the song, it switches off between ateez and halateez. this mv ends with the treasure instrumental & yeosang missing from the glass casing.

in hala hala, it is primarily halateez. the members in this mv are seen in darker attire & makeup and more clean cut. i believe halateez is from a universe where they are the ones in charge & calling the shots. if not that, then a very organized and powerful rebellion group. hence the same outfits almost like a uniform. this mv isn’t much but halateez dancing.. HOWEVER, the ending is VERY interesting. all members snap their necks at the same time (hence the lyric ‘suicide squad’).. all members BUT wooyoung. he ultimately pretends to do it, but is the last one standing and wiping blood from his mouth while surrounded by all of the bodies.. and remember, wooyoung was the only one alone in the room all of ateez were in while they were working on documents.

jumping to wave & illusion.. we can see that this is a pretty sudden change. however, it all still matches with their storyline very well.

in illusion, the members are seen in bright and colorful clothing on a flying boat asleep. in this, they’re back to that adventuring pirate crew from the beginning. however, the lyrics show that they have... no idea who they are and where they are. it’s believed too that the lyrics are talking to someone. in the middle of all of their singing about how they found paradise and how they can just party it up now, there’s a repeated “let me free” which kind of seems.. out of place. if we’re having fun, why do we need to be let free? as the title entails, this is all an illusion. the hourglass is seen again along with a glass cube and a butterfly on a table. we also see a quick glance of a halateez mask on the globe. we can see mingi listening to a headset/tape player. they make it to an island that is very.. fake. a large compass.. a floating hourglass and just very desaturated colors. even the members lose saturation when they reach the ground. they eventually find.. a cave? it has a lot of drapes and tinfoil looking walls. for a split second, we see a member of halateez standing there. ateez then reaches a very smokey room with lights and flowers. they don’t look so happy anymore. it’s like the illusion is very much wearing off. also remember, they initially were looking for their paradise so for the illusion of one to be broken... hmm. this mv ends with the members running away towards a light & shots of them sleeping in wave play where it ends with a whispered “open your eyes”.

in wave, the members are together once again on an island. just them this time. it’s very fun. but.. it’s almost like they were dropped there. i mean, sure it makes sense that san/yeosang/jongho wake up in a bed... but why is mingi waking up under a tree in the middle of nowhere? looking at the headset/tape player confused like it isnt his? why is seonghwa waking up in a pool and why is hongjoong waking up on the road? for the most part, they all wake up alone but they eventually find each other again. once they’re all together, we can see that ateez are suddenly the same carefree souls they were before. constantly talking about how there should be no worries.

in wonderland, it’s kind of.. hard to distinguish if this is halateez or ateez. we can see a lot of power dynamics here. hongjoong raps about how he shouldn’t be doubted if they wanted to reach neverland/their utopia. i say this because he mentions being a child forever like peter; but also because of the illusion mv. it’s also pretty obvious that mingi holds a type of power here. he’s seen as the center of attention with the marching band like he’s the leader of a grand army. aside from that, i think there’s a bit of a rescue mission occurring? in all honesty, i do not know where san & jongho are within the storyline for this mv. however, we can see that yeosang & seonghwa are in the same tunnel.. but not together. the elevator shot in the beginning is believed to show them going through time and same with the tunnel. which makes sense when you look at the updated ateez logo and the way it looks like it has a lot of lines that meet into the middle. aside from that, we have yunho staring at a bunch of tvs albeit they’re playing nothing we can see. then we have wooyoung.. all chained up and alone. it looks like nobody’s coming to save him the way hwa came to save yeosang and san. perhaps because he had betrayed them in hala hala? the staircase is also pretty important. i dont know the exact piece but i know it’s similar to an art piece that shows an endless staircase and continuous loop.. perhaps a hint at a continuous cycle in the storylines? seeing as this wonderland mv has gone up in flames, it looks like the next plan of action has to be to cross that bridge seen earlier. believed to have been the bridge between dystopia & utopia.

in the utopia mv, there isn’t a lot of crazy storyline? it’s believed that once ateez walk across that bridge and through the door, they’re in utopia... or so they think. it’s mainly a lot of dancing and pretty shots, but the reoccurrence of smoke-filled rooms leading to rooms of oversaturation is back. the answer vcr before this comeback also show a lot of story. we see halateez and ateez facing off together once again with essentially.. the same question. we’ve spent this whole time believing that ateez are the good guys and halateez are the bad guys... but what if that wasn’t the case? sure, we see them as such but is that who they really are? each respective party holds up a mirror to the other asking “are you evil?” / “are you good?”. cut to the iconic intro of san on his knees.. almost like he’s the one having this war? almost like he’s trying to figure out the answer himself about if he is good or evil.

the answer mv starts with a man in a white suit looking at the destruction of what was left behind of ateez/halateez. the move of san tipping over an overflowing wine glass.. it’s also thought like he’s turning the hourglass as well as if to start their timer once again. mingi is talking about how he sees that the end is near, but hongjoong brings up how we should finish as strong as we started until we get what we desired. it looks like wooyoung is walking in snow.. or is it the sand of time? i mean.. the hourglass was just tipped over wasn’t it? yeosang is seen alone in a red desert surrounded by broken glass. almost like he’s alone with no way out? speaking of mirrors, it’s also possible that ateez uses mirrors to travel through dimensions. like how san was staring at a member of halateez instead of himself in say my name? well.. yunho is surrounded by mirrors but cant seem to see anything but himself. he’s pretty frustrated about that. wooyoung is also seen in a room of butterflies. butterflies typical have a positive meaning of change, hope, transformation. we then get the icONIC AS HELL SHOT of halateez and ateez face to face at last at the table. as a repeated line entails, they’re making a toast to something. perhaps they have finally come to terms with each other and what to do so that they could exist peacefully as one? but maybe ateez has already done so much to one timeline that another had to be ruined? either way, an agreement was made between both hongjoong’s. at the end of the mv, we are greeted by the man in the white suit again... perhaps it’s another time traveler who knows about what ateez & halateez had done and was trying to stop them. no one knows who that is in all honesty. it’s believed that it might be one of the members.

FEVER ERA (EP 6-8):

PHEW OKAY UHHH.. honestly.. i say it’s crucial to watch this diary film at the very least. it explains this timeline of events now. halateez makes a brief appearance to hongjoong and the hourglass is back. poor hongjoong is tasked with finding everyone to bring them together once again. seemingly.. a fallout between friends.. another broken timeline. i feel as though it’s pretty explanatory on each individual backstory, but there is a lot more in depth things. like seonghwa crossing the line and breaking the rules. the endless loop of staircases being represented with san on the escalators as he recounts having to leave his friends again. they all have their individual things that grounds them whenever theyre feeling lost, but they also had each other. i’m assuming that ateez from the treasure era managed to mess up this timeline of ateez causing them to drive everyone away from each other.. which is why halateez tasked hongjoong with the control of time. i mean, an hourglass holds a specific amount of time but you can manipulate it by turning it before it’s done or choosing to turn it way after it has finished. ultimately, the diary film shows 8 friends who broke off into 8 different paths when they weren’t suppose to and now they’re trying to find each other once again.

we can see this in the inception mv. a lot of their dreams were broken and so they’re lost without it. ultimately.. they are lost again without each other and their dreams.

hm.. im not too sure about thanxx. we see a parallel shot of ateez holding the flag like in wonderland. we see the theme of defiance once again. this song talks a lot about how they’re choosing to move on their own path despite what anyone says because who knows themselves better than .. themself. in this mv, they tease their song the real, which they performed on kingdom.

SPEAKING OF KINGDOM.... EVERY STAGE HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH THEIR STORYLINE. wave overtune showed the pirate route where something happened to hongjoong’s crew and he lost them all. similar to how hongjoong in inception/thanxx has lost them all. from the wonderland is showing WHAT happened to the crew, but this time they don’t lose. rhythm ta (the awakening of summer) has all of these past props (records, yeosang’s violin) being confiscated. this performance is inspired by money heist. AGAIN, we have the theme of government defiance. on the newspaper that wooyoung rips up, it shows that the govt had deemed halateez (Black Pirates) as terr0r1sts. initially, i was wondering if this is just a re-branded halateez but then i remembered.... ateez and halateez had that agreement. perhaps this is the original ateez and they’re doing their part of the deal in protecting halateez. which means stealing back all of the stuff that was stolen and removing evidence & calling for the people to turn against the govt. i see this as halateez turning ateez into a second version of them. especially because the stage ends with hongjoong punching the glass and retrieving the hourglass after putting on a halateez hat.

in answer: ode to joy, it offers.. closure to the treasure era. kind of. we see yeosang in the glass case again looking at the man in white from answer. then it cuts to halateez seonghwa in the cage with yeosang & the two of them flipping the hourglass together. it’s like yunho tries to stop him, but is too late... which is when he starts facing off with the man in the white suit to distract him so that yeosang & halahwa can get away. we are once again greeted with halateez and ateez facing each other at the table directly mirroring each other. halasan is right behind him copying every move. i know.. yeosang’s bit has symbolism but i can’t remember.. but i know it’s suppose to be like he’s swimming? then during hongjoong’s part, we can see halateez assisting the members in each kingdom stage leading up to answer.. so it’s like showing that halateez (although not seen) has been orchestrating everything this whole time.

this last bit is pretty major in the story. so it seen that san is praying in the middle of this entire fight.. and wooyoung tries stopping him. his efforts don’t work and san essentially sacrifices himself so that he could fight the man in the white suit alone. i feel like there are more.. perhaps.. 8? men in white suits given that san took down one, jongho was with another, and hongjoong was surrounded by them. it makes me believe that these white suits are again ateez from another timeline trying to stop them. halateez is giving ateez the crown.. as if passing off their power to them. but jongho throws it away instead of accepting it. at the end of all of this chaos.. ateez ultimately comes out on top and defeats both halateez and the white suits.

OR SO THEY THOUGHT !! in the fireworks mv, they are seen in a dystopian society once again. if you remember, i had brought up smokey rooms often. reason being in the diary ver. of this album, there’s a part that goes into more detail about their story. i need to read into the theories for this era more but the smoke is very important. jongho recounts how he gets suffocated with a smoke that makes him see illusions and past events, but since it all feels so real it all just seems like DEJA VU.......... the dystopian society ateez are in for this mv... it’s smokey as hell. which is believed to be the smoke that causes such illusions but they’re able to break through it. i mean.. look at this teaser for the comeback.. looks way too colorful and peaceful. we don’t see this at all in the fireworks video.. SIKE. when ateez are walking around the dystopian wasteland (aka strictland), they’re in these nice suits. it’s almost like the effects of their illusion from the teaser was wearing off and they started waking up to the reality. and once they start seeing everything for what it is, they once again.. start creating havoc as they have in the past. this mv ends with the white suit man RETURNING ... and seeing the aftermaths of what ateez has done. he looks around as if he knows.. that it was them.

in the dreamers mv.. again it has small symbolisms. jongho with the headphones (mingi’s headphones).. hongjoong with the small cube.. the spray cans like from halahala. but i dont know too much here.

NOW.. WE HAVE DEJA VU AND ETERNAL SUNSHINE. we don’t have too much info on them right now since it hasnt been released.. bUT THE HOURGLASS IS BROKEN. the teaser they posted showed that the hourglass has been broken and essentially... all the timelines are broken. this leaves room for a lot of mixed up timelines. which is what people believe is the reason for the reoccurrence of similar hair colors from past eras on different members. we’re all getting deja vu from these repeated looks, no? eternal sunshine... it’s another super bright concept like illusion, thanxx, and celebrate. people are tying this to the movie eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (i actually like this movie). in the movie, the couple gets a medical procedure to have their memories erase from each other. perhaps like how ateez had forgotten about each other?.. but in the movie, the main guy is trying REEEEALLY hard to get her back. which causes a mess in the timelines of their memories. things start repeating with countless acts of DEJA VU and things that just do not seem real. which again.. lines up to their story.

SIDENOTES:

first off.. if you read all of this, i love you. i never have been so invested in a story like this before and it genuinely is such an amazing storyline.

there’s plenty i missed. like.. i didnt even talk about fever road but they have a couple things in there that elaborate on their friendship and everything. i also remembered their mama stage?? im p sure that had plot but i never.. looked into that one. and not EVERYTHING ateez releases is releated obv.. unless KJK is the man in the white suit but i doubt it.

but yeah :D those were just my thoughts. if you read this far and have any other theories, plEASE SEND THEM. i think it’s so interesting and i love discussing things.

ADDED NOTES:

control — if you look at some of the choreos, mingi controls ateez with just a gesture of his hand a lot. so perhaps that's also story-related as well? like how i mentioned he had a type of power in wonderland? leader of an army? ateez also has this seoul music awards 2021 perf where they dance like puppets, but it’s not orderly.. they’re missing their puppet master & this performance was during mingi’s hiatus.. hmmm

#SORRY I INFODUMPED ON YOU AND IM SORRY THIS IS SO LONG BUT I JUST !!!!!!!#you really do need to know the story because just saying that theyre pirate timetravelers isnt enough #i dont even know if anyone will read this . i didnt even think it'd get THIS long #if you do read it im giving u a kiss because wow #answered #save

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piplupod · 2 years

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#this is purely a shitty vent #bc i am feeling feelings and i dont know what to do w them #but i dont fucking understand ppl who are into tulpas (isnt that a closed practice??? from a branch of buddhism??) to make thmslves plural #like. idk. i assume endo and tulpa systems are set up differently if theyre a thing that happens #im not going to tell anyone that i know their brain situation better than them #i would def believe that endos can exist bc I've read abt different cultures that have ppl who experience the world similarly to plurality #anyways. the tulpa thing #why tf would u want to make headmates #i love my headmates/alters. i appreciate that they're around #but holy fucking shit. if i could choose rn i would choose to not have this disorder #but also if i didnt then id be dealing w this trauma full brunt of the stick myself so. maybe its for the best #idk #i just dont get it. maybe its fun when u dont have the trauma part of things lmfao #but i do think we need separate terms for traumagenic experiences w multiplicity/plurality #vs any other origins. because holy shit they're so different from what I've seen #and i do get a little annoyed sometimes when i see ppl giggling abt their alters when they dont have trauma origins #when i go looking in spaces that are for OSDDID. like. idk. i think we need entirely separate terms #anyways wtf i dont understand why ppl would want to create a headmate #now u have more than one person in one body! that is a VERY huge thing to deal with #even without the trauma I'd assume it'd still be massively difficult and fucky and i just... dont get it #anyways sorry i try not to touch syscourse bc ppl get very violently aggressive abt it and send death threats and suicide bait lmao #but im just. incredibly confused and hurting #also a rly nice mutual blocked me at some point bc i said smth abt endos. fucking hell #im like. still trying to figure this shit out but i try to err on the side of being kind and believing other ppl w their exps #and now i am blocked by someone i almost considered a friend :') i hate it here lmao

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literaphobe · 5 years

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hi michelle! so want to start saying that i identify as bi and honestly, I would LOVE it if jake was bi. I think it'd be great. But i'm also okay if he's not, bc how cool is it that they're allowing a man to break down traditional gender norms/roles! i think one of the greatest parts of loving a show like b99 is that it lets us escape the 'real world' for twenty minutes every week. and that means something different for every person watching the show. 1

SO while i believe you are entitled to your own opinions, and you can share them on your blog bc it's yours, i don't think its fair to invite people to share their opinions but shut down anyone who feels differently than you. for example, you said to someone who said they didn't care if jake was bi that you hope they 'get well soon'. also, you posted saying that if bi people didnt want jake to be bi then they're wrong. im sorry but thats really hurtful. you dont get to decide how people think 2

just bc someone feels differently than you doesnt make their feelings less valid, ESPECIALLY someone who identifies as lgbt+. you run a popular blog and it makes me sad to think people might feel their opinions are less valid or wrong bc they see it here. again, im not saying you cant have opinions or post them. but maybe just think about how your words can affect others. also saying this off anon bc i respect you and am open to having a conversation. Thanks for reading, hope u have a good day

hi. thank you for ur mannerly tone and for having the courage to go off-anon.

mlm/bi representation will always be more important than ‘straight man comfortable with his sexuality’. while i am not saying that straight men in media shouldn’t be portrayed as comfortable in their sexualities, the stance that it’s okay to take away representation from people in the lgbt community as long as we have Good Hets is harmful, and it gives people in the tv/movie industries a cop out. they don’t have to give us more lgbt characters! straight characters who Know What’s Up are good enough to make them seem woke and avoid criticism! and whether you’re comfortable with this happening as an lgbt has nothing to do with it. we have to hold the media accountable, we can’t just settle for less. whether you want to watch b99 uncritically or not is entirely up to you. i get that it’s exhausting to analyze the media content you consume! i more than understand just wanting to escape and not ask for more! it’s tiring! it’s draining! it’s disappointing, it hurts so much and it gets so so lonely. but we can’t just let the world stagnate. progress needs to be made constantly, and shows can’t be made to feel like they can just do one or two good things and not be expected to do anything else! i’m not asking you to fight for this, i just want the acknowledgement that this is the right thing to do

i didn’t exactly... invite anyone to say anything. i truly am just sending my thoughts out into the void. and yes, i am aware that my words reach a wider audience because i have a larger than average follower count. of course i know my words can affect others. that’s what i’m trying to do. aside from getting thoughts out my brain, i want to promote a less passive line of thinking. i want lgbt folk to want better for themselves. unfortunately, because words and actions have responses, people will climb into my inbox and start conversations that i inevitably have to take part in (sometimes i don’t though. it really depends on where my head’s at that day. having to discuss this repeatedly is draining). most of the time, i’m just making a statement

i don’t particularly enjoy “shutting down people who feel differently from me”. usually, if i’ve done that, i really am tired because i’ve likely discussed and explained numerous times whatever it is the person who got shut down said to me. i might also come off as mean-spirited or perhaps aggressive if i know some anon is just trying to pick a fight/spew hate at me. if you don’t understand where i’m coming from/don’t believe why having an opposing stance is harmful (this might vary depending on the issue), i am (given i have energy that day) more than willing to elaborate on whatever it is i say here. if i say stuff like ‘get well soon!’ it is a tired response to something i have already covered in depth and i am making some semblance of a joke to deflect/put a lid on the stuff i really want to say (likely because i have already said it)

i never said that bi people who didn’t want jake to be bi were wrong. i was trying to get them to think deeper and explore why they don’t want that. being lgbt sometimes means that we allow and normalize a lot of unfair treatment. we think that we have it good enough so we decide not to ask for more, to settle. and i will never blame any lgbt for falling victim to this line of thought. we were brought up to think this way, we were conditioned to think this way. acceptance does not equal inclusion, and sadly many of us are so grateful for the acceptance that we do not bother to even think about having inclusion. or, better inclusion, for that matter. of course, it is definitely not up to me to decide how anyone thinks. i’m just trying to convince you! very desperately. but if you don’t agree no matter what i say then what can i do? it’s your life. it doesn’t affect me much in the grand scheme of things. i’m not going to hate you for disagreeing. i’m not going to sic the dogs on you. am i going to be kind of annoyed if someone walks into my inbox, turns on anon, and hurls insults at me? yes, that’s hurtful, and it’s kind of funny sometimes depending on how dumb you sound, but it’s mostly tiring and a lot of pain. so like... read, if u don’t like it, move on, if your well-being is drastically affected from reading the things i say, i’ll tag it so you can blacklist

the sad thing is, being a member of the lgbt community doesn’t automatically make your opinions on lgbt issues valid/unproblematic. internalized homophobia exists. things i described in the point above can lead to this. just because a bi person says ‘im bi! and i don’t care/don’t think bi jake is important!’ doesn’t mean that suddenly, there is no need for him to be canonically bi, that we aren’t being queerbaited/pandered to by the show. do i think that the show is intentionally/heinously queerbaiting us? not exactly. but lack of awareness and lacking understanding on why bi-coding jake w no intention to make it canon is just as harmful bc it produces the same result (in jake’s case)

once again, i don’t intend for people to feel “less valid/wrong” when they read what i have to say on this blog. self-reflection is important. sometimes, people have opinions that are wrong! including myself! which is why more often than not i think deeply into the things people say to me here and consider whether my opinion holds up. you don’t have to feel bad for being wrong. we are all constantly wrong on stuff. everyone, at some point, has had a bad take/the wrong take on something. if you hold yourself up to this standard that you must always be right or you are suddenly a horrible person/must feel bad and demoralized, i suggest that you change your approach to issues such as this. i hate to say this but it is not my job to make sure everyone is 100% cool and chill about everything i do and say here. some things need to be said. some things need to be acknowledged. i’m sorry if any of you have been hurt/upset by anything i’ve ever posted but after a certain point... that is your issue and not mine

#ask #ncrit #sorry for the long post #thank you once again for being respectful #i hope this wasn't too harsh #i hope you have a nice day too :)#arnie-santiago

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protagonistheavy · 3 years

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Spoilers for Kipo season two but I dont want to make a read more lol.

Wow so, I think I know why season two of Kipo kinda sucks so much lol. I guessed this immediately when season two started up, or like, specifically whenever Kipo sang to the mega monkey for a whole second time. I thought right then and there, "oh my god, they're gonna make this mega monkey turn out to be Kipo's mom." And holy shit, yeah, they really did... just do that.

I'm so unhappy with this lol. What a dumb decision. And I'm taking a hard guess here, I could totally be wrong... but with the presentation of things, and considering just how clunky season two has become... I can't help but think that this WASN'T the original idea. I get the feeling that the mega monkey was just, a normal mega monkey whenever it was written and played out in season one. And only in season two did the writers decide to double-back and make the mega monkey way, way, way more important.

The seams of having to stitch the story around are pretty visible in some places. Like I said, Kipo goes through the whole song and dance of the mega monkey a second time in season two, as if it didnt happen in season one, because they really wanted to play it up for the season in which there's a big reveal that they're related. You have the fact that no one ever gendered the monkey until season two, when it's relevant and it'd be awkward to misgender her lol. Like for sure, they definitely intended to bring back the mega monkey and give it importance, hence why the mega monkey wanted to take Kipo somewhere. But uh I'm sure it wasn't THIS. And like, notice too that the monkey just recognizes Kipo now when she isn't mind-controlled. Like, just normal now it seems lol, when before when she wasn't under the mind-control effect, she was still... just a monkey.

I can't help but feel like this is going to tarnish season one a little for anyone that watches it a second time. It will make the couple of episodes where the mega monkey is important just feel extremely awkward to watch, knowing that the dynamic is entirely different than what's thematically happening.

I think the other part that bugs me is that... fucking, there was a WHOLE episode in season one, the one with the water dude... where the theme for Kipo is SPECIFICALLY "my mom isn't a mute and she isn't secretly alive, that's a reality I have to live on with, that I can still be happy even after life is unfair." So it's soooooooo, soooooooooooooo annoying that they're just going to BLATANTLY backtrack and say "actually that plot twist sounds really cool, let's make that happen!"

The whole Fun Gus thing was stupid and Mullahund or whatever was an extremely lazy addition. He appears in part one JUST to say "hey I'm going to help solve your problem in part two :)" and then in part two, he appears just to solve their problem and leave. I mean, why? They really couldn't have thought of ANY other way to escape Gus? They had to first randomly summon a season one character, make them disappear and be entirely irrelevant, and then have them come back, just so they can... hold Gus down for a few minutes? It's sooo lazy...

And you know how I keep bitching about the pacing? Yeah well here's a great example. Episode ends with Kipo realizing that the mega monkey is her mom. She just learned what her anchor is (that's a stupid plot thing too, btw, but extremely forgivable) and the audience is unsure if she'll be able to actually use it. She transforms, she runs after her mother.......................... Next episode begins with a zany flashback to one year ago, where Benson conveniently stumbled upon the especially-minor antagonists that will come up later on in that episode. Intro card. Now we return to Kipo going after her mom. Hoooly shit. Why did this even need a fucking flashback? The whole thing with the bats just needed a rewrite that doesnt fucking break the pacing so terribly. Why did it have to be the case that Benson ran into these bats before? Could the plot not have worked any other way? It's just that, nothing is REALLY gained from Benson's flashback here, except to prepare us for when these villains randomly show up again. So why not just, I dunno, make better villains? Make a more relevant threat? Interweave it with ongoing elements in the plot?

Man, season two is a ride in some of the worst ways. It's still entertaining, but it's missing so much of what made season one so engaging. So many lazy points of writing, so much reaching to try and be like Avatar lol.

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ohoshi · 3 years

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i watched the dont lie svt mafia game (the first two links u sent) and it was so fun!!! i love how you dont know who the mafia is until the end so it’s like youre playing along too :) also seungkwan was so smart!!! gradually building everyones trust and gathering allies around him!! i was so sad when he was killed off tho, he literally was abt to catch the mafia 😭 and hoshi REVEALING HIMSELF AS THE MAFIA was the funniest thing ever but also really smart like he turned everyone against mingyu (who honestly i thought was the mafia too), and in the last round hoshi was just openly like “who should we kill today” IM DEAD 😂 also can i just say that jeonghan looked so GOOD in that game...he’s such a sexy mafia 😏 i cant wait to watch their second dont lie mafia game!

u already know for 127 jaehyun was my first bias and now mark is my ult <3 and for dreamies if u dont count mark (since i knew him from 127 first so kinda unfair) i think jaemin was prob also my first and current bias?? he was my first bias and i just never stopped 😂 for wayv i think my bias is yangyang hehe :) im trying to think abt what similarities in my biases are - it might just be the smiley happy funny ones with the best laughs as we talked about before (this is weird but i think when i first meet someone i notice their laugh?? like i love ppl who have laughs that you can tell are just truly from their heart if that makes sense) i might also have a slight bias for rap lines but i think that is not as concrete as the smiley/funny thing!

omg thats so cool that you know so many languages!! youre so cool hehe :) i always have so much respect for ppl who learned languages (idk i dont count me knowing canto as learning a language bc i kinda passively learned it thanks to my parents hahaha) i took french and spanish for a bit in school but i didnt continue and have thus forgotten most of it D: (which i kinda regret, i want to try learning french again someday) also i totally get that about chinese and japanese being intimidating...ive always thought it'd be so cool to learn another asian language (and one that is more widely used than canto) but they are quite hard, esp for chinese/japanese where the writing system is a lot harder to learn!! i learned korean hangul so i can sound out words veryyyy slowly but i dont know what they mean 99% of the time 😂 i havent seriously applied myself to actively learning a third language but i've always wanted to! i can understand basic korean phrases tho since i watch so much korean content ahahaha

hmm as for weird phobias, i really hate cockroaches?? or bugs in general...and i also hate when circles are bunched together rly closely lol (i think it’s called tryptophobia but i wouldnt recommend googling that cuz it grosses me out so much omg 😰😰)

ok now to close this out on a happier note lol i THINK i can name all the svt members now??? like with maybe 85% accuracy 😂 and i think my first biases are joshua, jeonghan, & kinda dino and vernon :)) but i feel myself slowly falling for all of them i love how chaotic they are and ive laughed so much watching their videos already 😊😊

AAAH i'm so glad you loved it 🥺 ikr it was so good??? i especially loved the part when hoshi just blamed mingyu!!!!! and manipulated everyone into thinking that he was one of the mafia!!! what a smart move but also fun? hoshi the god of variety shows!! tbh i kinda knew minghao was the mafia since the beginning... he was just too quiet... i mean he is a quiet person yk but he was more suspicious than usual 👀 and i guess bc in the beginning they gave us the preview of their reactions and he laughed and knowing he's a scorpio i only assumed... so i didn't 100% buy hoshi's lie bc i was still sure that hao was one of the mafia 🤷🏻‍♀️ still tho it was legendary!!!! but i guess mingyu played it stupid and he was sus to begin with so 🤷🏻‍♀️ yeah.... YOU CAN SAY THAT JEONGHAN LOOKS GOOD BC damn right he does 😍 he is a beautiful man what can i say 🤷🏻‍♀️ he is also very confident in himself (the other day i watched one gose ep from 2019 it's called debate night i think and basically they're having a debate about the stupidest, most pointless things in the world (like is it better to live AS a pigeon or live WITH a pigeon for a year, or is it better to have 3 eyes or 3 arms 😅) and jeonghan always had a counter argument, ALWAYS, but he would say it so confidently looking handsome as hell he could make me believe that grass was blue..) btw gose always has dumb content like this but still i think it's the best idol content out there only bc svt are crazy funny and chaotic and those 13 boys share a total of 2 braincells shared by wonwoo and jun each; like there is one ep i think it's called the8 and the 12 shadows ans basically they all move in a row and all 12 of them have to repeat what the first member is doing, it might sound smart when i explain it but if you'd watch it you'd see that it's so dumb and pointless but it's funny and 1hour long and carats watch it bc 🤷🏻‍♀️ anyways what i'm trying to do is show you what you're getting yourself into😌

ohhhh i think jaehyun, mark, nana and yangyang all have beautiful smiles and they’re all very smiley and bright people 🥺 so that's definitely the one thing your biases have in common 🥺 that's so cute 🥺 oh you think you're attracted more to the rap line? 🤔 all of your nct biases are indeed rappers (jaehyun is a i can do it all i'm 97 line he is excluded) so maybe??? but yeah you biasing bright idols is 🥺 adorable!!!

ahh thank you 🥺 i try!! yeah most people forget languages if they don't use them regularly </3 kinda scared i'll forget french bc i never use it nowadays, i used to know a woman who only spoke french and i would have to translate to her what my family tells her and vice versa, it was a great french exercise 💪 but i don't see her anymore so </3 the fact that you speak canto and chinese(mandarin i guess?) intimidates you really adds fuel to the fire<3 it's great that you know how to read hangul!!! me too!! you'll get better at reading with practise! but compared to chinese characters i don't think it's that hard, i mean, how do chinese people even memorize all the characters?? or WORSE how do foreigners memorize them??! writing in chinese must be so hard do you have to pay attention to all the tiny lines?? that's a lot of work 😨 i am terrified 😨 do you also know basic japanese phrases from anime?? bc personally i do but i know a lot more korean than japanese i mean thank god, i'm learning korean religiously tho 😂 still tho can't watch idol content without titles</3 (except with chinese wayv members who struggle OMG MAYBE I LOVE CHINA LINE BC THEY MAKE KOREAN A BIT EASIER? anyways i completely relate to them bc korean grammar is so hard, so strange and so different from grammar i'm used to in 'western' languages)

cockroaches? 😨 i too hate insects of every kind<3 so i understand <3 oh i know about tryptophobia(?)!!! one of my friends is scared of the same thing too, have to admit it does look disgusting 😬 i'm also afraid of heights and water!!! (but like the sea and the ocean sjsgsjaha i can't swim!! and i never want to!!!) 😨😅

AHHHH I'M SO PROUD OF YOU 🤧 what a bias combo thooooo 👀 jeonghan? i approve! he is so fun!!! so beautiful!! sexc 👀 jeonghan is so interesting i love him and also joshua is so pretty too?? i mean obvs they're both visuals sjgssj but it's different with shua bc i can look at him all day it's soooo calming to just look at him?? ahh angelic! it's kinda interesting to me bc you bias jeonghan and joshua and jihan (their ship name) is kind of a big deal™ did you know that????? i assume it was unintetional and you had no idea about it jsgsja i also approve of vernon and dino as well but i mean i would approve of anyone and everyone at this point 🤷🏻‍♀️ have you seen pics of jeonghan with long hair??? i feel lowkey bad for saying this but he is so beautiful i deadass thought he was a woman 😧

#ss20

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kurgy · 7 years

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yo I hate to ask like this but please know it's coming from a genuine place of understanding. I'm a trans individual, no college education (I didn't even graduate hs), no family whatsoever, i have bipolar/anxiety/ptsd/insomnia, and also my back is hella fucked.. but i still got a shitty job @ the local mall yknow? idk your situation is horrible and i know it'd be stressful, but it'd be better than being constantly vulnerable. have u applied anywhere recently? min wage is still $$$

same anon as the last ask! it can be really hard to work your ass off for like $7-$8/hr but honestly if you were getting enough shifts at this job you wouldn't have to rely so much on art as an income (im aware that it can be stressful, i used to freelance a lot), and you certainly wouldnt have to beg online for help from strangers--which can be v difficult. i used to work in phoenix and the jobs didnt pay great, but i made enough to get out of AZ within a few months (while payin rent n all)

god i normally just delete these but im already in a bad mood i get these things (albeit normally more aggressively) everyday and ive had enough and need y’all to understand something. im already doing everything im physically capable of to keep myself fed and bills paid. theres no “just get another job” advice you could possibly give me that i either havent already heard or isnt useful at all. or both. this is worded nicely but its the same damn “just do more” message that doesnt fucking work.

im really not sure where to even begin with this, i think im just overwhelmed by the fact that i have yet another person coming into my inbox assuming to know everything about my situation and what i do with my time based on what theyve read from my donations post and acting nice by giving really typical “advice” as if im an idiot and havent already been looking for a better paying job than what i have right now.

youre trying to be nice, i get it, i appreciate the nonaggressive way you worded this, but when it comes down to it this is still one of the many asks or comments i get from people daily who think they know so much more than me and think im not already doing everything i can. the most i can say is at least you didnt outwardly condemn me for having a donations post/fundraiser.

just because we’re both trans and have mental illnesses doesnt mean our situations are the same. i have a personality disorder, paranoid schizophrenia, daily command hallucinations that demand i injure myself that i cannot stop (as in i cause myself physical harm daily and cant control my impulses which is u know bad), ptsd, severe depression, and an actual diagnosed physical disability that hinders me from doing the most basic of tasks, hell i cant even walk. even if i keep my mental disabilities to myself when job hunting, i have to share the information about my physical disability eventually, and guess what? it makes me a workplace liability. employers dont like workplace liabilities. i work 24/7 already, my art only being a fucking side job. you dont know me. you dont know what i do. and the only info you have about my situation is the info ive chosen to share. you dont know anything about my situation. and this doesnt even go into all the family trouble that directly affects my finances and quality of living.

please just. do me a favor. if u see one of my donations posts, my commissions post, or any of my stores, and think “im going to go tell this person what 1000 other people with zero understanding of their situation have already said” just. dont. instead of sharing what you believe to be an insightful opinion on my increasingly fucked up life just. scroll past the post. you dont have to give it attention. you dont have to share it. just ignore it. because i can guarantee ive heard it all before, and it doesnt help anyone.

oh and fyi, im already signed up with an organization to help people like me with schooling or job hunting, and its still a fruitless effort so far. theres no magical advice you can give me that will get me out of my shitty living situation or a better paying job that my actual case manager hasnt already been doing.

#sorry if this sounds aggressive but it kinda is #ive had to explain over and over again to people asking the same questions over and over again until they finally realize #'oh youre already doing everything you can' and im tired of doing it #im tired of having to jump through hoops to justify myself to ppl on the internet who dont even have to guts to message me off anon about it #personal//#Anonymous

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