#i got it during my fuckin long weekend???

[sugawarassoulmate]

not nut november - nov 04/nov 05

after the first few days, they were feeling great. then the weekend came.

tutor!akaashi & shitty bf!daishou

word count: 423 & 290

cw: fem!reader, bimbo!reader, unprotected sex, cheating/infidelity, choking, minors dni

tutor!akaashi

who even does studying on a saturday night? akaashi does, which means you have to too

you're in one of the study rooms at the campus library, which feels a little redundant since it's practically abandoned on a saturday night

"what act and scene is this line from?" akaashi asks, cooly. he's been quizzing you on king lear for the past three hours, making sure you knew could identify the passages for your midterm

"act three, scene two?" you guess but akaashi's eyes already tell you that you're wrong. "ugh, can we take a break, keiji? my brain is turning to mush!"

akaashi would argue that your brain was mush to begin with but there's no use continuing when you've already given up

there was one way he could motivate you to keep studying — it was for your own good really, you weren't smart enough to pass this exam just by winging it

but he remembers the bet he made with his friends earlier this week something about not having sex during the whole month. it was stupid but he knew he'd never hear the end of it from bokuto if he lost

akaashi supposes he could just eat you out while you study but nothing does the trick more than making you sit on his cock, making you read out his notes while you bounce in his lap...

it's not long before akaashi has you bent over the desk, skirt flipped up and panties pushed to the side. "come on, don't just think with your pussy, recite the line for me," he says, pulling you by the hair

"ahhh, 'when thou dost ask me blessing, i'll'—fuck, keiji!" you cry when he pulls out only to slam back into you.

a slap to your ass is what brings you back to reality. "'i'll...i'll kneel down and ask of thee forgiveness' uhhh, act five, scene three?" you answered, crying when akaashi's fingers circle your clit.

"look at that, she's finally using her little brain," akaashi coos, snapping his hips harder into you. "read the next one." he says, knowing this is the only way you'll pass

he can say it's for your benefit as much as he wants to but akaashi is just as guilty of thinking with his crotch, maybe even more so

akaashi only lets you cum when you've gone through all of the study guide and he rewards you by spilling his seed deep inside your womb and walking you to your dorm with his cum running down your leg

shitty bf!daishou

saturdays are meant for your girlfriend. taking her on dates and watching shows with her

but it's not saturday and you're not daishou's girlfriend, which is why he's technically not breaking any no nut november rules right now

his friends explicitly said that fucking your girl was off limits for the entire month

which is why he turned to you the first chance he got

"sugu!" the two of you barely made it past your door, with daishou pouncing on you the second he shut it behind him

now he's got you spread out on your floor, a hand wrapped around your throat

"shhh, i know, babe," he whispers, pace never letting up as he abuses your cunt. "you're gonna take all my cum this month, yeah? be my fuckin' cum dump?"

it's so sick and your heart breaks for mika, completely unaware that her boyfriend is balls deep in someone else—someone she calls a friend

but you nod anyway because for an entire month daishou's body will belong to you

mika will have to wonder about the faint smell of your perfume on his clothes, wondering why it smells so familiar

it's pathetic and cruel and so unlike you but it's what you want more than anything

"yes, yes, sugu! i want your cum," you gasp, nails running down his back "i'll take all of it, just give it to me, please!"

and daishou just loves the desperation, grunting a quick "that's my girl," before fucking you harder than ever

and as your eyes roll into the back of your head, and you feel the warmth of daishou's cum flooding your cunt, all that goes through your head is his voice saying "that's my girl," over and over

©sugawarassoulmate 2023 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!

#haikyuu smut #haikyu smut #akaashi smut #akaashi keiji smut #keiji akaashi smut #daishou suguru smut #daishou smut #daisho smut #suguru daishou smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #no nut november 🍑 #🥀 #🥀akaashi #🥀daishou #tutor!akaashi #shitty bf!daishou

[as-is-above-so-below]

The Captain - Simon Riley x Sniper!Reader, Wife!Reader

Part 3: Let's Have a Baby

summary: Ghost’s sniper wife (reader) joins Task Force 141 on an op, against his wishes call sign: Freyja warning: MDNI, mentions of canon typical violence and death (ofc), implied child loss Note: The much-awaited part 3 of The Captain! Thank you so much for all of your support! And don't y'all, Part 4 is brewing ;) Enjoy and blessed be! << Previous | Next >>

“Mohawk’s gettin’ particularly long, Johnny boy. When’s the last time you took any off the top?” Freyja asked, tugging at the end of a long strand at the back of his head.

“Dinnae dae that!” Soap whipped his head around and gave her a look of playful irritation. “If it weren’t for that wee barra in your belly I’d knock ya one, lass.”

“You wish, tough guy.”

“Just you wait, soon as y’return to full duty, we’ll have a square go, ye fuckin’ weapon.”

“I’ll block off my calendar.”

She and Soap had grown rather close since they all returned to England following the mission. As promised, Ghost spoke with Price, who convinced Kate to transfer her to the 141 permanently. While she was on desk duty for now, being on the same team would be tremendously helpful in keeping their schedules in sync. The couple could carpool to and from the base together, and John would do his best to keep them from being deployed at the same time.

Plus, she got to spend all her day with her friends and husband, which was a phenomenal change of pace from their previous setup. It was far less lonely being surrounded by the bustle of the busy base and having other friends to talk to besides Price.

They had a standing ‘play date’, as Price called it, every Friday night, where they watched movies, played board games, and ordered takeout. Board games usually ended in a heated exchange between her and whichever unlucky soul had crossed her (usually during Catan), her normally fiery temper heightened with each month of pregnancy that passed. There had been several instances of Ghost scooping her up in his arms and hauling her away to cool off before (any other) objects were lobbed at someone’s head.

One time, Freyja was in rare form when Gaz refused to trade for a material she desperately needed, and whipped a pointed dinner knife in his direction.

“What is with you guys and throwing bloody knives at me?!” he cried, throwing his hands in the air as Ghost dragged her off, screaming obscenities in various angry-sounding languages.

Soap jerked the blade out of the wall. “Dunno if I should be turned on or terrified,” he had said thoughtfully, turning it over in his hand. 

“BOTH, YOU SLIMY, CHEATING MOTHERFUCKERS!”

Catan was banned for a few weeks after that incident, and Freyja gave Kyle the following day off as an apology, though he insisted it wasn’t necessary.

Freyja lowered herself into a chair on the other side of Soap’s desk and leaned her head on her fist, watching him do his paperwork. She’d already finished for the day but was waiting for her husband to fetch her and bring her home to prepare for another Friday with the boys.

“So, Captain, any big plans for this weekend?” Soap asked, still scribbling away at the stack of forms in front of him.

She pursed her lips and shrugged. “Nah. It’s our anniversary on Sunday. Have a routine visit tomorrow to see how the baby’s growing. Nothing crazy.”

“Anniversary?! You didn’t tell me that was comin’ up!”

Her eyes rolled with a chuckle. “Soap, we aren’t showy people. Never have been,” she started, adjusting to sit straighter after having slid down in the chair a bit. Her round belly had started to weigh down her body a few weeks back, and she was starting to feel the effects of back and neck pain. “We weren’t together for very long when we got engaged, if you’d even call it that. We got married a few days later, as soon as we got back to the UK. Didn’t want to waste time, given our line of work.”

Johnny laughed at this, tossing his pen into a mug he fashioned as a stationary holder. “Oh, I’d bet he just loved slappin’ his name after ‘Captain’, too,” he joked with a raised brow.

The image of a spinning circle on a computer came to mind because that was exactly what she was doing. Buffering, her mouth open slightly while she processed his comment. Her mind screamed at her to say something, anything, but nothing came out as she stared at the Sergeant.

He clearly picked up on her inner turmoil, because he asked, “What? What’d I say?”

Goddamn pregnancy brain. “Ah…Nothing. He didn’t like me taking his name, actually,” she mostly muttered, unable to find a way out of the conversation at this point. “He asked me not to change my name and I did it anyway.”

“I don’t get it, why wouldn’t Ghost want ya to change yer name?”

Freyja sighed as she rubbed a hand over the top of her bump, a recent habit for comfort. The baby hadn’t been particularly active that day, only offering a bit of shifting. “You’d have to ask him, John.”

She rarely called him John, so he knew the conversation was over on her part. “How’s your back?” Best to change the subject and move on. 

She was grateful for it. “Terrible. Even sitting here is bothering me.”

Soap lit up and he practically jumped to his feet. “I can do that thing I saw Ghost doin’ last week!” He was already in front of her before she could even answer.

He had been relentless ever since he caught their cute little private moment in the kitchen when she was supposed to be getting herself some fruit to snack on. Simon followed shortly after, offering to get her fruit bowl together for her so she could sit down again. Craving some semblance of independence, she instead offered to cut up her snack while her husband took some of the weight off her back.

“Walked myself right into that one. You just want an excuse to grope my belly.”

“Me? Never! M’offended that y’would say such a thing, Bonnie,” he feigned hurt feelings, pouting with his best puppy dog eyes.

“Alright, fine! Come’ere, I’ll show you,” she laughed, high up in her chest. Freyja pulled herself up with his hands and moved them to the more open space in his office. “Alright, so I’m gonna stand here—“ She turned to press her back against his chest and took his wrist in her hands. “—then you just wanna put your hands flat like this—“ She flattened his palms just under the swell of her stomach, by each point of her pelvis. “—and now you carefully pull up. Emphasis on carefully.”

She groaned at the sudden relief, her head falling back against Soap’s shoulder as he just barely lifted her stomach. 

“There w’are. Steamin’ Jesus, how’s such a wee thing so bloody heavy?”

“Yeah, now imagine carrying that around with your back twenty-four-seven.”

They stood silently for a minute, soaking in the relief from the lack of pressure on her disks. A small hand dragged across the underside of her stomach, pressing against Soap’s hand. His chest rumbled against her back, but he held steady.

“Will anyone be coming for a visit? When she’s born?” It was bold of him to bring up such a sensitive subject, but his curiosity got the better of him.

“No.”

“And you’re alright with that?”

“I have everyone I need right here, Johnny. Who else outside my husband would give my back a break and hold my giant belly?” She reached back to jokingly slap his cheek a few times.

“Where’s that husband o’ yours at? It’s gettin’ late.”

A soft knock on the open door had her turning her head. “I’m comin’, Jesus,” Ghost said, approaching with his hands in his pockets, t-shirt tight as ever. He took in her smiling form, intrigued by the scene in front of him. He smiled beneath his mask, eyes crinkling slightly. “How are my girls?”

Freyja flinched, a hand flying to her belly at the sharp kick. She sported an angry pout. “Ow! That hurt, you little–”

“Be nice. She can’t help that I’m her favorite.”

She pulled out of Soap’s hold, sad to lose the help on one hand, but thrilled to see Simon on the other. “You’re so obnoxious. I’m literally creating her organs and limbs, making sure she has ten fingers and toes, and I don’t get so much as a single hand or kick. But the second she hears your stupid voice, she’s suddenly an MMA fighter,” she complained, shoving at his shoulder. “Un-fucking-believable. I hate you.”

“Mmm, sure you do. How will I ever get back in your good graces?”

“I want Chinese tonight.”

“I think I can manage that.” Ghost bent down to gently, but briefly, touch his forehead to hers, one of their familiar gestures to refrain from more overt displays of affection on base. She would occasionally give him a peck over his skull mask, and they often shared passing touches, but neither partner was a huge fan of PDA. In the comfort of their own home, they were much more obvious, even around the other members of the team. Just not on base (save for a quick romp. Or two. Or– y’know what, never mind).

“Aw, lookit ya wee sook,” Soap cooed, nudging Ghost with his elbow as he walked past, gathering his things to head home.

She giggled and patted Simon’s pec. “He really is!”

Simon grumbled but guided Freyja to the door with a hand on her lower back. “If you lot keep talkin’ nonsense around me, I’ll pop a gasket.”

“It’s not nonsense, Simon. It’s a beautiful language. One that your people just so happened to smother into near extinction,” she sang, pursing her lips in a challenge as she looked up at him walking next to her.

“OOO, sick burn, lass!” Soap smacked their hands together, laughing heartily.

“Fuckin’ hell…”

~*~

Simon checked the time on his phone again with a deep sigh, shaking his head. He detested getting to work anything past ten minutes early, and it was currently five past six. Freyja had told him to go ahead and toss their baby bag in the car, which he had done ten minutes ago. He insisted they keep their ‘go-bag’ (her word, not his) with them, either in the car on errands or on base during the work week.

The area around their front door was littered with broken-down cardboard boxes from various toys and furniture from the nursery. The Task Force had turned out to be extremely generous uncles, to the point where the Rileys hardly had to buy anything. Johnny and Gaz were by far the worst listeners, continuing to purchase mountains of clothes long after Freyja and Ghost begged them to stop. Enough clothes that she would never have to wear the same outfit twice for the first year of her life.

Not even born yet and already spoiled rotten.

Her boots weren’t in the tray by the door, so she must have gotten to that part of her routine, at least. He pushed off the door frame in their entryway, making his way toward the living room. “Frey, what are you doin’? We’re already five minutes late–”

He cut himself off when he laid eyes on the sight in front of him – his wife, now 39 weeks pregnant, attempting to contort her body around her bump to lace up her boots. Simon allowed himself a moment to watch in amusement before clearing his throat and grabbing her attention. “Do you need help?” he asked, about to kneel in front of her.

She grunted and shook her head, then tried to smooth the mussed-up fly-aways that had started to poke up at the edges of her tied-back hair. “No, I can do this. I just did it on Friday.”

“Darling, that was three days ago. There’s no shame in askin’ for help–” He stopped again at the icy glare thrown his way, crossed his arms over his chest, and sat in the armchair across from her. “A’right, if you insist.” He had long noticed that she sometimes struggled to accept help with tasks she could normally complete on her own, if not for a protruding bump being in the way. He knew if she really needed help, she would ask.

This time, she propped the heel of her boot on the coffee table and attempted to stretch over her belly. She was proud of the strength and flexibility she had been able to maintain throughout her entire pregnancy, up until now. Not many people could say they could even see their feet this far into their pregnancy, let alone tie their shoes. After another minute of huffing and puffing, fingers just barely unable to graze the laces, she held her foot out to her watchful husband and sighed. “Fine,” she mumbled, crossed arms mimicking his.

He smiled softly under his mask, blue eyes twinkling with silent laughter as he slid to his knees at her feet, pressing the sole into his chest. “Thank you,” he praised, taking his time to focus on doing her shoes up at the tightness she liked to support her ankles, but allow breathing room at her calves. As he finished up the second foot, he heard a quiet sniffle and jerked his head up to meet her eyes.

Bloody hell, not the waterworks again…

He gently pushed her legs apart and settled between them, his gloved hands covering and rubbing her knees. “What’s wrong, love?”

Freyja wiped her nose with the back of her hand, then used the neckline of her t-shirt to swipe at her wet cheeks. “Nothing, I’m just annoyed. Feels like I can barely function on my own.”

“If I recall, you’re the one who insisted on working until she’s born.”

“Fuck you.”

“Promise?”

She playfully shoved his shoulder, rolling her eyes as she scoffed. 

Ghost pulled his mask up to his nose, just enough to steal a long, soft kiss from her, fingers still gripping her thighs. When they broke apart, he swooped down to press wet kisses on her belly. Freyja put the fabric back in place with deft fingers. “A’right, we sorted?” He smacked her thigh twice when she nodded and offered her hands to help her stand. “Good, you know how I am about bein’ late.”

“Maybe I’ll get lucky and she’ll be an early bird like her daddy.”

“Better than always being late like her mum.”

“Low blow, baby. Low blow.”

They made jabs at each other back and forth the entire ride to base (lovingly, of course) and during their walk to their offices, only pausing for the occasional passerby.

~*~

Kyle handed off a steaming mug of tea to Ghost, taking a small sip of his own as they watched the recruits spar with Soap. Most days, the three of them worked with the privates for a few hours, varying from marksmanship, hand-to-hand combat, etcetera. Ghost tugged his mask up enough to enjoy his caffeine, the steam dampening the wrinkled fabric.

“How was your weekend, Ghost?”

He hid his subtle smirk behind the cup, the memory of their anniversary evening at the forefront of his mind. Ghost met Gaz’s gaze with a side eye, to which the Sergeant snorted with a throaty chuckle. Gaz fixed the brim of his hat lower to shade his eyes from the sun better. “Shouldn’t have asked,” he said, a bright, cheeky grin on his face. “Change the subject.”

Ghost thought back to that morning, snickering himself and cradling the mug with both hands. “Frey couldn’t tie her boots this morning.” He tried to hide his amusement, he really did. But both men burst into deep laughter, Gaz shamefully covering his eyes with his free hand as he imagined the Captain working around her stomach.

“Bloody hell, poor thing.” When they finally composed themselves, Kyle took a deep breath and wiped a stray tear from his eye. He sighed and placed his now empty mug on the ground, his hands now hanging onto the lip of his tactical vest. The Brit observed the training session, occasionally glancing over at Ghost to gauge his mood. Maybe he should mind his business, but Gaz also wanted to be a good friend to the Rileys. In the end, he decided to take the plunge. “I see it, y’know,” he said, choosing a careful tone.

Simon turned his head fully to shoot him a probing look, urging him to continue.

Gaz sighed to himself. In too deep, now. “Just something I’ve noticed. Seems like she’s done this before, s’all.”

Damn Kyle Garrick and his perceptiveness. How long had the Sergeant been sitting on that thought, watching and observing her mannerisms? Simon stood staring blankly at his companion, unblinking for too long. His heart clenched painfully, twisting and beating violently against his ribs. When his eyes did finally come back into focus, he covered his face again. “As you were, Sergeant,” he commanded, his tone stern and unyielding. Neither of them noticed the Scot break away from the recruits, reading a text from his phone.

“I don’t mean to pry, sir–”

“Lt?” Soap held the device up, brows knotted together. He didn’t make much of an effort to hide his emotions and was concerned. “Price needs ya, sir. Said he’s pretty sure yer wife’s been in labor for the last hour.”

The trio quickly appeared in her office, where she sat behind her desk, beads of sweat on her forehead as she typed away at her computer. John shrugged helplessly and then scratched at the stubble under his chin. About an hour into their daily morning meeting, where he brought her peppermint tea while they worked over files and potential recruits. They were mid-discussing her scheduled c-section when he noticed her breaths sporadically shake, or the muscles in her arms tightening for seemingly no reason. Price asked her if she was okay and was brushed off every time he prodded at her; when he finally had enough, he decided to call for reinforcements.

Freyja glared at the men, mainly aiming it at Price. “Traitor,” she growled, continuing to work through another contraction.

Simon tossed the keys to their car to Price, who swiftly snagged them out of the air and slipped behind them. In the meantime, he tucked his mask into the back pocket of his jeans, his slightly overgrown blonde hair and the top of his head sticking up. He sat on the edge of the desk, looking down at her as she attempted to ignore his presence. His foot slipped a little on the floor, and he found a small puddle trickling across the floor from the space under her chair. “Anything you want to tell me?” he asked, impossibly soft and gentle for a usually deep, gruff military man.

“No.” She was an accomplished sniper and a skilled linguist and had been deployed on hundreds of special missions, interrogations, and rescues during her military tenure. She, however, wasn’t very convincing when it came to lying to her husband, especially when another sharp pain rippled through her body, forcing her to flinch.

“Wanna try that again?”

Her eyes watered uncontrollably, her lip trembling as she tried to keep herself together. The notion didn’t last long, and her head shook from side to side.

“How long?”

“Long enough.”

“Hm.” Simon turned her chair with his shin until she faced him. As he suspected, dark wetness was creeping up the fabric of her jeans. “We should get going then, yeah?” He tilted his head to the side, watching as she grabbed his hand in a fierce grip.

“Simon–” The woman choked on her tears, panic starting to claw its way up her stomach and wrenching her tight throat. “The OB’s out of the country,” she whimpered, barely a whisper.

“I know. Seems that she’s taken after her old man, like y’said,” he offered in an attempt to give her some comedic relief in her state. Simon could see the panic attack set in, and while he knew he couldn’t stop it, he could at least lessen its effects some.

“I was kidding.”

He smiled softly at her and squeezed her palm, drawing soothing circles with his thumb. “Don’t think she’s quite old enough for sarcasm, there, sweetheart.” He got down to his knees in front of her, sitting back on his heels, just under eye level now instead of towering over her. A familiar position for them as of late. “Looks like we’re doin’ this the old-fashioned way.”

She started crying hysterically now, nearly crushing his hand and cradling her belly. “Simon…I–”

“I know.”

It was as if their audience had completely disappeared, leaving just the two of them for what should be a private moment. But Soap and Gaz were still pressed to the wall by the door. In the months they had become close friends with Simon’s wife, she was almost always composed, her moments of hormonal rage the only outlier they witnessed. They’d never seen her such a panicked, blubbering mess, but Gaz had an idea he knew what it was about, even without specifics. For that reason, he chose to keep his distance and advised Soap to do the same with a tap to the shoulder.

“This–This isn’t the plan. I wanted…they’re supposed to take her out. I don’t want to push again.”

“I know,” he repeated. “I’m sorry, love, but you’ll have to.”

“Can’t we just–” A gasp cut her off, her features pinching together in pain while she rode out yet another contraction.

“No. We can’t.”

“I can’t do this again, Simon! I can’t!” Her chest heaved and she sobbed, struggling to catch her breath. Panic attacks had become more frequent during her pregnancy. There had been about five or six instances where an odd feeling or uncomfortable pain had anxiety washing over her, sending her into a spiral until they could get to an emergency room or OB, snapping at them to ‘just fucking check, for fuck’s sake’. This was definitely one of the worst. All of her meticulous planning, down to every nitty-gritty detail to ensure she didn’t have an episode went right out the window because a certain impatient Riley was eager to make her exit and simultaneous entrance to the world.

The world was collapsing around her, dark and suffocating. The cold pit dragged her back to what seemed like another life, where she lay curled up in a hospital bed, sick and hot and in the worst agony she would ever experience. Her bones burned and ached, struggling to sit still yet unable to move at the same time. Price’s phantom touch ghosted up and down her bare back in that place, brushed her sticky hair off her forehead, pressed a cold towel to her neck as violent sobs and forced, unnatural contractions tore through her—

She blinked when different, gloved hands slipped under her hair, the warmth of her skin bleeding through the material as he cradled her face. Her fingers slipped down to dig into his tattooed wrist. “You can, and you will. Take a breath,” he took a deep breath, guiding her through the exercise. He held the air in his chest before letting it out in a slow exhale, which she mimicked. Ghost summoned Gaz over and rose, pulling her up with him. “Good girl. Can you walk?”

When she nodded, Kyle slipped into the space beside her, offering his forearm for support. She knew Simon could have handled her himself, but it warmed her heart to see him leaning on their friends. John had been a great support system when Simon deployed on his own, but having so many hands to hold made her feel loved and understood.

“A’right then, let’s have a baby, yeah?”

taglist: @esthervalea, @miss-leto, @lethalchiralium, @sweetestcowboy, @blueoorchid, @apocalypticseagull, @eatingtheworldsoffanfiction, @covenlovenn, @330bpm-whiplash, @gnoccheyy, @jaggernauticals, @dwkfan, @untoldshortsofthefandomsdoms, @bobfloydsgf, @maviee, @thomaslefteyebrow, @kyovy, @prodyng, @scout-fang, @avalkyrieofparis

Copyright © 2023 as-is-above-so-below. All rights reserved.

#simon ghost riley x wife!reader #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley x sniper!reader #husband simon riley #simon riley x wife!reader #simon riley x pregnant!reader #simon ghost riley #task force 141 #john soap mactavish #soap call of duty #soap cod #ghost cod #ghost mw2 #cod mw #cod mwii #fanfic #cod mw ghost #captain john price #kyle gaz garrick #pregnant reader #angst #fluff #call of duty #task force 141/reader #ghost 👻 #ghost x y/n #modern warfare 2 #modern warefare reboot #ghost mwii

[pascalscoffin]

Curvilínea

- Curvaceous - Requested by this lovely, lovely person

Full Pedro Masterlist

Warning: Minors Go Away I Will Kick You In The Forehead. Smut(it’s not crazy descriptive): oral (f receiving); protected p in v (do whatever you want); vaginal fingering; Javi talks about your pussy in the third person (shut up). Curvy/Plus size!reader. Reader uses she/her pronouns, she and Javi are the same age. Reader understands and speaks Spanish a couple times (probably like once). Reader co-owns a bar rather than just being a bartender. Body Shaming warning!! (Please it’s so mean. I had to look it up I couldn’t even fathom something to say. I FEEL DIRTY) I’ll have them in italics or something. Javi being a gentleman. Violence (a couple punches). Mentions of past drug use/abuse. Mentions of ODing. Alcohol mentioned briefly. Physical description of after an OD.

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><

Co-owning a bar with your best friend wasn’t exactly your lifelong dream, though if you thought about it hard enough you didn’t ever have a “lifelong dream”. Sure when you were young you wanted to be a singer, an actor, a doctor, the president, a race car driver, a scientist, and a slew of other professions but the fascination with them never lasted long and you were hopping to the next ideal job faster than your parents could keep up.

But in college you met Lucy and Eloise, who would become two of your best friends. In your junior year, the three of discovered cocaine at a party, you and Eloise were more weekend or bi-weekend doers. Lucy, though, who’d grown up troubled and surrounded by the stuff, fell in head first. Lucy was always talking about the three of you opening up a bar together, naming it The Lucky Horseshoe, and living together in an apartment nearby.

And then that was the dream, you and Eloise stopped doing coke and fought to get and keep Lucy clean, which got more difficult with each relapse, until eventually Lucy went in over her head and you and Eloise found her face down in her own throw up.

After that, you and Eloise stuck true to your promise, saving up money and moving to Lucy’s hometown of Laredo, Texas to open the bar. She always talked about missing Laredo, so with her ashes, given as she didn’t have any family left besides the two of you, you went to Laredo and bought a small bar. Originally you were going to call it Lucy’s Horseshoe. But when you got the sign it had said Lucky Horseshoe, and considering that was what Lucy had wanted to name it, it stuck.

You and Eloise often worked together on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays since they were your busiest days of the week, one of you typically able to handle it during the week. Of course, it wasn’t perfect, drunk assholes were drunk assholes whether you owned the bar or not, they tended not to care if they were shitfaced enough. Which is why you were trying to politely tell this guy you weren’t interested, but he wasn’t getting the hint.

“Cmon, doll. When you gonna let me take you out, huh?” Don was a regular, every Friday at 8pm he came in and sat in the same stool until close, desperately trying to hit on you. “I don’t date patrons, Don. Besides, you’re drunk.” Don waved his hand at you with a grunt. “‘M tipsy. There’s a difference.” You made a face while you had your back turned, pouring him a glass of water and sitting it down. “Why don’t you drink some water and I’ll call you a cab.”

“Or c’n jus’ take me to your place. Show you a real good time.” You sighed heavily. “What’s the matter? You got a boyfriend or somethin’?” He scoffed, apparently finally agitated with your constant ‘no’s. “No- I don’t have a boyfriend-“ “girlfriend?” “No.” “Husband? Fiancé? Situationship? Anythin’ holdin’ ya down?”

“No, Don, I don’t.” “Then what’s the fuckin’ problem?” Don scoffed and you rubbed your hand against your leg. “… I’m just not interested, Don? Okay? I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, you’re a nice guy.. you’re just not my type.” Don leaned back and looked absolutely scandalized by the idea that you couldn’t possibly be interested in him.

“Seriously?” You opened your mouth but he stood up and cut you off. “I come here every god damn Friday, talk to you, try to be a nice fucking guy and take you out for a good time and I’m not your type?” His jaw clenched. “Y’know- I wouldn’t be so god damn picky if I couldn’t see my whole body when I looked in a fucking mirror. Fat bitch.” He ripped his jacket off his chair and turned around, immediately being cracked in the face, stumbling back and then getting hit again, actually falling out this time as OH’s echoed around.

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Javier had decided, since he’s been back home for about a year and he’s now settled back in, that tonight he’d go out and try to dip his toes back into the dating pool. There were no high hopes, really, tonight was mostly just to go out and get a feel for what the pool actually looked like. When Chucho suggested a new bar called Lucky Horseshoe, Javier had been skeptical, thinking maybe it was one of his dad’s old guy bars.

He was surprised to see a nicely decorated bar with great music and even better alcohol lined up behind the bar. He’d looked around, contemplating sitting at a table before deciding he’d sit at the bar, and then there was the choice of sitting on the right of the bar or the left. After two minutes of staring at the bar he decided to sit on your side.

After he sat he took that time to look around and really get a feel for his surroundings, the place was nicely decorated and a look above the alcohol showed him different photos of you, the other bartender, and a third girl, the name Lucy was written in the middle of all the pictures and he imagined the other side of the bar looked the same, a closer look at the backsplash for the alcohol would show the same type of deal, photos of a pretty blonde girl, some photos had you and in the other bartender but most were different photos of just the girl, Lucy he guessed.

He hadn't been sitting there long when you'd strolled up to him, probably about a minute, he ordered a whiskey dry and then you were being called over by a guy who was definitely wasted and probably shouldn't have anymore drinks.

He was having a decent time, chatting up different women or talking about sports he couldn't care much for with guys that sat around him, just getting to know people rather than trying to get to know them. He’d picked up on the conversation a bit, keeping himself tuned in when he picked up on the guy’s persistence.

The guy barely had his insult out before Javier was standing up and walking over. He waited for him to turn around and immediately grabbed his collar with one hand, and hit him square in the nose with the other. He let go of his shirt and watched him stumble before hitting him again, watching him fall to the ground. “Fuck! Dude! I think you broke my fucking nose!” He yelled, blood pouring onto his shirt as he held his face.

“Someone should teach you how to speak to women.” Javier grabbed his collar and yanked him up. “What kind of idle-minded, pathetic Hijo de puta son of a bitch do you have to be to hit on a woman, and then talk shit about her body when she says no?” He growled, turning him and shoving him to the door, taking a step towards him as the kid, Javier could tell now he really was just some kid, probably just turned old enough to drink, way too boyish to go after a woman like you. He stumbled back a bit, holding his nose. “Now get the fuck out of here before I break more than your god damn nose.” He grabbed the guys blazer-gross-off the back of the chair he’d been sitting at and threw it in his face.

His friends, who were smart enough to stay out of the fight, helped their friend out of the bar, yelling that they’d just lost their business, though he figured it wouldn’t be missed very much. Javier found himself following behind them, standing just outside the door as he watched them get into their car and peel away.

He was just about to go back in, make sure you were alright, when he quite literally slammed into you just as you were stumbling out of the bar, holding in your own tears. "Shit- I'm sorry." You stepped away from him and he shook his head. "My fault, I wasn't paying much attention." He looked down at you and cleared his throat. "Are you alright?"

You nodded quickly, npt looking him in the eye as you felt the tears start to well up. You always put. on a brave face when people talked about your body, pretended like it didn't bother you, you'd grown up with the comments so at this point you should be desensitized to them. Yet, still, the comments always bothered you, the backhanded compliments about your clothing from skinny female patrons who had frat boys hanging off their shoulders, "innocently" agreeing with their weekly snatch.

"I'm fine." He didn't seem to believe you, though, his brows furrowing before he gently grabbed your hand. "Come on." He guided you over to pnce of the benches outside the bar and pulled his cigarettes from his pocket. You watched him curiously, waiting for him to say something as he put a cigarette between his lips and extended the pack for you to take one, you hesitantly took one and mumbled a soft thank you.

He didn't say anything, though, just put his pack away and lit the cigarette dangling between his lips before reaching his lighter out to light yours. Now that you were actually near him, silent, with no patrons keeping you from admiring him- he really was handsome. A prominent nose with laugh lines crinkling around his dark brown eyes as the flame of the lighter flickered in front of his face.

You looked away from him, though. Just because he punched a guy for body-shaming you, doesn't mean he's interested, he likely doesn't want you ogling him while he's just trying to smoke his cigarette. "Um... why did I have to... sit here?" You asked after a moment. He looked at you and shrugged. "Figured eventually you'd give up the lie and admit that you're not okay."

You blinked rapidly and looked over at him. "Excuse me?" He sighed and leaned forward a bit. "You're not okay." He shrugged a little. "You don't have to be, but... That guys a prick, alright? Shouldn't listen to him." You frowned a little as you pulled your cigarette from your lips, slowly exhaling the smoke from your lungs before letting out a soft laugh. "I don't even know your name and you expect me to just pour my heart out to you?"

You had to admit it seemed inticing, telling him everything that bothered you, because it felt like he wanted to listen, like he wanted you to tell him every little thing that entered your mind. "Javier Peña." You looked down at the hand thrusted towards you and looked back up at him before slowly taking it and telling him your name. He repeated it a time or two and the way it sounded on his tongue made the bottom of your stomach burn.

Peña... that name sounded familiar... "Is your dad Chucho?" You asked curiously, brows furrowed as he widened his eyes. ".. yes. Chucho is my dad." He chuckled. "Didn't realize he was on a first name basis." "Oh, yeah. Chucho's an angel." You laughed softly and sniffled. "So- you're the famous Javi he goes on and on about."

"God- he doesn't." "He does. You should meet mi hijo Javier, he always says." You laughed softly. "He's very proud of you, he loves you a lot." "Uh-huh. What else does he say about me?" You hummed softly. "Sorry, I've been sworn to secrecy." "Oh, have you?" "Oh, yeah. It was a whole thing." Javier snorted a little and shook his head. "Right. So.. he comes here a lot, then?" You nodded. "Definitely. i mean, you don't have to worry about him he really doesn't drink much, I think he just likes the company."

He nodded and took a drag from his cigarette, choking on it with your next sentence. "i also think he really likes talking you up." He coughed violently and looked at you with furrowed brows. "What?" You nodded. "Mhm. Always talking about what a good man you are, how him and your mama taught you how to properly treat a lady. He's had to tell Don off a time or two before." Huh... well played, Chucho.

The old man sure knew how to formulate a plan- and kill two birds with one stone. He knew Don would be there, knew he would bother you, and of course he knew his son would step in and save the day, and if you and Javier just so happened to hit off, then he could stop worrying so much about him.

"Mm I see." Javier nodded. "Well- thanks for letting him hang around." You shook your head with a laugh. "He's sweet, I was more than happy to keep him around." You said happily. Javier chuckled softly and nodded. "Still. Thank you."

You were quiet for a while, the two of you smoking your cigarettes as you glanced at Javier from the corner of your eye. "... thank you for what you did." Javier looked at you and shook his head. "Don't thank me. No one should be spoken to that way." You chewed on your lip. "I should be used to it now, really. I've heard shit like that so much..." "But it hurts anyway." He said softly, making you nod as you reached up to wipe your eye as tears started to slip again.

"Don't cry, mi diosa curvilínea." my curvaceous goddess. He whispered softly, reaching up to swipe under the opposite eye slowly. You laughed lightly and sniffled as you looked up at him. "Well Chucho was right about you being a real flatterer." Javier chuckled softly and tossed his cigarette to the side before taking yours and tossing it in the same direction. "I'm serious."

His other hand came up to cup both of your cheeks. "You shouldn't let a Pendejo like that make you upset. He's not worth it." He rubbed his thumbs along your cheeks. "A silly little boy who resorts to tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants. You're too much woman for him, anyway, he wouldn't know what to do with una diosa like yourself." You felt your cheeks warm up under his hands, a slow grin stretched across his face. "Now- do you think your friend would let you go for the night?"

"W-what?" Javier chuckled. "Would she let you leave? There's nto very many places open at this time of night but a woman such as yourself should be wined and dined- or at least dined." You laughed lightly. "Who says i wanna be 'wined and dined' by you?" You asked curiously.

Obviously you did, you really did, watching Javier knock out Don had started a stur in your belly and the longer you sat there with him the warmer it got, the tighter it pulled. But still, you couldn't just fall right in line, you didn't want him to think you were some kinda whore, especially not after Chucho's told you all kinds of admirable things about him.

Javier tilted his head a bit, his finger running down your cheek and along your bottom lip. "Do you?" He asked softly, his eyes searching over your face before settling on yours. You swallowed thickly and slowly started to nod. "I-I'll be right back." You stood up quickly and stumbled back towards the door, your cheeks burning as you spun around and went inside quickly, over to Eloise.

"Eloise. You know i love you and I would do the same thing for you in a heartbeat- can i please leave with that beautiful, beautiful man outside." Eloise looked up from the glass she was cleaning and widened her eyes. "You whore!" She gasped before looking around at the nearly empty bar. "I can totally handle this. Go, go, go. You deserve it- and I expect all the details tomorrow morning." You nodded rapidly. "Yes, obviously. Okay i have to go now thank you so much and wish me luck with Chucho's son."

As you were grabbing your coat and practically sprinting from the bar, you heard her screech. THAT'S CHUCHO'S SON?! When you stepped out you saw Javier looking at you with raised brows, chuckling softly. "So.. I'm famous around the bar?" You laughed and shrugged. "I told you, Chucho is very, very proud to have you as a son... as he should be."

Javier chuckled and shook his head a little as he started guiding you to his truck. "Whatever you say, Diosa." He looked at you curiously when you stopped. "What about my car?" You looked over towards the run down beamer and he chuckled. "It'll be fine here, I'll bring you back for it in the morning."

You were a little hesitant, your brain momentarily making you consider the fact that this man was very obviously capable, and that going off alone in a car with a man you didn't know was a very bad decision. But something about his eyes, his pouty lips, made you nod your head and smile at him. "Yeah I-I can just come back for it tomorrow." He nodded and guided you towards his truck, opening the passemger door for you to get in.

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The diner was small, warm enough you had to take off your jacket, but not so warm that you were sweating. Javi was sitting in front of you, his elbows pressed against the table. "So I know you're not from Laredo." You laughed and nodded.

"No. No I'm not." "So, where are you from, then?" He asked, you were waiting on your food so you didn't have to worry about a waiter coming over to take your orders. "Las Vegas." Javier's eyebrows shot up to his hairline. "Vegas? Really?" "Oh, yeah." “How was that?” “Not that exciting, honestly.” You laughed softly and he chuckled.

“Yeah I guess all the drunk gamblers get annoying.” “God and it’s worse if you’re a woman with tits.” You rolled your eyes. “I swear, men get drunk and they think every woman with a pulse wants-“ you blinked rapidly as if realizing you were shit talking men- to a man. “Sorry.”

Javier shook his head. “Don’t be. I’m guilty of the same- except usually the women I come onto actually are into me.” He chuckled softly. “Pretty easy to tell when a woman’s not interested- if you have a couple brain cells to rub together.”

You laughed and shook your head. “Think Laredo might be missing a few.” “Probably.” Javier laughed and nodded.

“So- Chucho suggested the bar but… didn’t say anything about it?” He shook his head. “Nope.” He chuckled. “Said it’d be a good scene for me to go to.” You hummed and nodded slowly. “Guess he was right.” He added. You felt your cheeks warm up as you looked up at him, chewing on your lip lightly. “Huh?”

“Good scene.” Javier chuckled and shrugged a little. “Minus the whole having to punch a guy.” He hummed. You opened your mouth and tilted your head. “I’m sorry I’m-I’m a little lost now.”

Javier laughed softly. “I went out because I’ve been back for almost a year and I still haven’t talked to anyone- female or otherwise.” “He thinks you’re lonely.” Javier shrugged. “He’s not wrong.” He sighed. “I have been a little lonely.”

You raised a brow. “Really?” He nodded. “Yeah.” He sighed heavily. “My partner at work is… my only friend. As depressing as that sounds.” You blinked rapidly. “Oh… well I know how you feel. I don’t have many friends. Eloise and Chucho, really.” He nodded. “How come?”

You hummed and shrugged a little. “I guess I don’t… like most people honestly.” You laughed softly. “I can be around other people but eventually my social battery just runs out.” “But you’re a bartender.” You nodded. “You’d be surprised how little people actually pay attention to their bartender.” He hummed and nodded like he understood.

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You sat and talked with him for what must’ve been two hours, not leaving until the waitress came around to give you your bill and send you on your way so she could close up and go home. You’d gotten closer in the time you were there, Javier eventually moving to sit next to you on your side of the booth, playing with the ends of your hair or the collar of your shirt as you talked quietly with eachother.

And now, you and Javier were back at your apartment, both agreeing you’d rather finish your night somewhere his dad wouldn’t hear. Eloise had even texted you to say she’d stay the night with her girlfriend Cheyenne rather than going home when the bar closed.

You knew Javier was attracted to you at this point, hell you were just as attracted to him. But that didn’t stop the anxiety you felt building in your stomach as you sat on your couch, gripping a beer bottle tightly in your hands as Javier looked at you, leaned back against your couch. You weren’t ever really insecure about your size, but every once in a while the harsh words would get to you and you’d be left floundering for the confidence that once radiated.

“Come here, Diosa.” He said softly, holding his hand out to you. “You’re so far away. Me siento solo aquí.” I’m lonely over here. You felt your cheeks warm up and hesitated before grabbing his hand and sliding closer to him on the couch. “Are you… sure you-” “don’t be silly.” Javier chuckled softly and leaned forward to set his beer down before grabbing yours and sitting it down also.

“I’m not a little boy, Hermosa.” He turned to you and brought his knee up onto the couch so he could look at you head on. “You’re all woman.” He hummed happily and licked his lips slowly. “And I don’t shy away from a woman like you.” He kissed your cheek lightly, and then your neck. “Just more to love, hold, kiss.” He mumbled softly before bumping his nose against yours. “But if you’re not up to it we don’t have to do anything. Just sit here and talk.”

You looked up into his eyes and blinked rapidly, chewing on your bottom lip before you leaned in and kissed him quickly. He hummed, happily kissing you back as one hand cupped your cheek and the other curled around your back and pulled you closer to him.

It wasn’t long before you were laid back on your bed, looking up at Javier in nothing but your bra and panties as he ran his eyes over you. You felt yourself getting shy again, shifting and moving your hands to cover your stomach. Javier was quick to grab your wrists, though, gently tugging your hands above your head. “Don’t.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your neck before making his way down, stopping briefly to press kisses and slide his tongue along your stretch marks, making you shift and your face and neck heat up.

“Eres hermosa, Diosa, no necesitas cubrirte. Demasiado hermosa para eso.” You are beautiful, Diosa, you don't need to cover yourself. Too beautiful for that. He whispered as he got between your legs, looking up towards you as he slid your panties off. You swallowed thickly and mumbled a shy thank you as he tugged your panties off and tossed them to the side, groaning at the sight of you, wet and pretty and waiting. “Been wondering all night what she looked like- tasted like. Gonna let me taste, Diosa?” He looked up at you again, brown eyes big and pleading and how could you say no to that?

You gave him a rapid nod, shifting as you spread your legs further. “Please.” You whimpered softly, chewing on your lip as he grinned before he was diving down. He started with gentle kisses pressed to your labia before spreading them and pressing a kiss to your clit. Your eyelids fluttered and your head fell back as you moaned softly.

You’d been with quite a few men, but it had been a while so you were feeling a little desperate. When his tongue reached out and slid through you, you gasped and moaned a little louder, tangling your fingers in his hair as he started massaging your clit with his tongue, moaning against you as his eyes closed.

He let go of your labia so they closed around his mouth as he sucked on your clit, one of his hands traveling down to prod lightly at your hole before guiding two of his fingers into you slowly. Your back arched and your grip on his hair tightened as you shuddered and moaned, pressing down on his fingers. “Javi..” you chewed on your lip as he started fucking you steadily with his fingers, his other hand coming up to play with your breast and twist your nipple.

He hummed against you, massaging your clit as he sucked on it, his hips pressing into the mattress as he started moaning. “Joder, qué bien sabes, Diosa. Tomando mis dedos tan bien, también.” Fuck, you taste so good, Diosa. Taking my fingers so well, too. He pulled away to speak, panting heavily as he pushed a third finger into you, licking his lips. You opened your mouth to speak but were cut off with a loud moan when he dove back in, curling his fingers directly into your gspot this time, massaging the bundle of nerves as he continued licking and sucking on your clit.

“Fuck- Javi- Javi please.” You whimpered, tugging on his hair as you looked down at him, lip trembling. Javi hummed against you and pulled away again. “Please what, sweetheart? Hm?” He asked softly, pressing a kiss to your thigh as he continued fucking you with his fingers.

“Necesito que me folles, Javi. Quiero tanto que me folles...” I need you to fuck me, Javi. I want you to fuck me so bad... you begged him, whimpering softly. “Please.”

Javi hummed softly and kissed your cheek gently. “You’re so pretty when you’re begging.” He teased, sliding up to kiss you softly, slipping his tongue into your mouth and letting you taste yourself, which wasn’t something you cared much for in the past, but when it mixed with Javi’s saliva it had you trembling.

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You weren’t sure how long you’d been going at this point, but the sun was coming up and you’d only stopped once for about ten minutes to get water and catch your breath. You didn’t think it was possible for you to cum anymore at this point but you could feel that familiar coil building up again. You’d lost count of how many times you’d cum.

“J-Javi-“ your voice was hoarse, wrecked and scratchy from screaming his name for so long. Now, though, he was pushing into you ever so gently, grinding his hips at the end of every thrust. “What, Diosa? Gonna cum again? Hm?” He purred softly, pressing harder into you. “Can feel it. She’s squeezing me so hard, baby. Just begging me to stay right here so she can drench me so good again.” He nuzzled your neck, his own voice gruff and raw as he moaned.

You were even more surprised with Javier’s ability to cum so much, not nearly as much as you but definitely more than you’d expect a man to be able to do in a matter of hours. As soon as his hand reached down, pressing just enough into your overly sensitive clit to have you screaming his name and cumming hard around him, your legs shaking and tightening around him as your nails dug into his sweaty back.

Javier groaned and started fucking into you more frantically, hands gripping your hips tightly as he groaned and huffed into your neck, offering a few more sloppy thrusts before spilling into the third condom he’s worn since you started, groaning weakly into your neck as his muscles trembled, breathing heavily.

You laid there for a moment, catching your breath before Javier slowly slid out and fell next to you. He panted heavily and slid the condom off, tossing it into your trashcan with the others. “… holy shit.” You whispered softly, swallowing thickly as Javier chuckled and pulled you close.

“We’ll get up soon to clean up and shower. Pretty sure neither of us can walk right now.” “I’d fucking say. How the hell did you do that?” You looked at him wide eyed as he furrowed his brows curiously. “What do you mean?” “Javi- you came like four times- we used three condoms.” Javier shrugged a little. “Happens when you have a sexy ass girl underneath you.”

Your cheeks warmed up and you shook your head shyly as he gripped your ass and kissed your neck. “Take a little nap. I’ll wake you up soon.” He promised. “This is my house.” “Yeah, well, I’m a cop and I’ll arrest you.” “You can’t arrest me for not taking a nap.” “Failure to cooperate with law enforcement is against the law.” You huffed and pushed his face away before laying your head on his chest. “I should thank Chucho when I get home later.” You heard him mumble before the sleep took over your mind, leaving you unable to respond.

You’d have to thank him yourself, maybe bake him some of those cookies he liked so much. And then you’ll shame him for not warning you that his son was that damn charismatic. Or telling you how to contact him sooner.

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I hope you enjoyed this! Been working a lot lately but I was finally able to finish it!

#pedro pascal #narcos #javier peña asks #javier peña x reader smut #javier peña smut #javier peña fanfiction #javier peña narcos #javier peña x reader #javier peña #Javier Peña oneshot

[enbesbians]

hi there, haven’t been able to write all that much lately which bums me out but i wanted to share a story of mine i think some of you may be interested in.

if anyone here doesn’t know, im experienced within sex and im a very erotic person online as well as in real life. i haven’t had many sexual partners but with the partners i had been with, ive done a lot of experimenting. i wanted to share the first time i used a strap on a girl and the embarrassment that held within that.

during the springtime after my birthday, i had taken upon myself to invest in a strap on. i would always jokingly look on sites like adam and eve, window shopping at all the ones id like to get, feeling as if id never be able to, mostly cause i was scared shitless of my parents finding out that their offspring was buying a sex toy, let alone a fucking strap on. i went to spencers where they had a very limited selection, i wasn’t too picky, even though i stood in that section for god knows how long. it was a gummy purple five inch dildo, with a black harness that felt like a belt of a car— it was rough, complicated and left my skin feeling like i had rug burn. maybe it was because i didn’t know how to properly put it on or maybe the material was just that shitty… i don’t have it anymore so i can’t really test that theory.

my girlfriend at the time and i were very awkward with one another, we couldn’t even look at each other without geeking out and needing to squeal but when i had sex with her the first time (without the strap) it wasn’t as bad as i thought it would be. i was lucky enough to have a good enough tongue and a perverted mind where my hands would touch all over her like she was gold. the lead into that was funny though… i kept laughing and hesitating to do things like kiss her neck, touch her thighs… even taking her bra off, my hands were sweating and it seemed like the clip could not budge. i accidentally hit her nose (twice i might add) and i was not able to use dirty talk for the life of me… i hated my voice and saying ‘baby’ to her during a time like this made myself want to cringe knowing that i was able to hear what she could. but as we eased our way into it, the better it became and the more relaxed we started to be. by the point of me getting the strap, we had sexted two nights before, me being confident thinking i can totally ace the work of a strap on due to the numerous homemade lesbian porn videos of women straight banging their scene partners. she didn’t know i would buy one and she didn’t even mind the idea that we’d never even use one, but i got so turned on by the image of me using it on her so i worked on impulse and got it.

as the weekend approached, i believe the last day i was going to spend the night, i showed it to her. she giggled so hard, covering her face, telling me how she couldn’t believe i owned one. she was more excited than i thought she would’ve been and it only built the start of my ego to think id be any good at using it. thing was… my anxiety began to rise as things got more intimate. i felt like i couldn’t kiss her correctly and touching her body felt like my first time, shaking hands, constant deep inhales, and i would stutter, tripping over my touch as i tried talking sexy to her.

putting it on in front of her felt like i was being watched by the devil in the depths of hell… maybe even deeper— my body was so hot, i couldn’t stop trembling and i almost dropped it i think three times. she was nervous too and with the lack of communication it didn’t help much of anything.

i didn’t know how to start… i knew to prep her with my mouth and fingers and lube but as i started, it took so many times to get it inside of her… i kept saying i was sorry, asking her if she was okay and the frustration on my face was enough to almost break the mood. with her laying on her back, i finally got myself inside of her. moving my hips felt like i was pushing a bolder— they were so stiff and inconsistent. they got sore so fucking quick and i ended up stopping so many times just to ease the tension. it felt like hours and nothing was progressing and took into account that maybe using a strap was not something id ever use again. she didn’t cum from it so i just took it off, feeling embarrassed and stupid for not looking into how to use the damn thing. i just continued to do what i usually did and left it at that.

as some of you may know i value my partners pleasure and even if they’re satisfied, i strive to be better and with that night alone, i thought of the worst… i thought she was going to break up with me. i thought she wouldn’t think of me as this could person she’d always seen. i felt like i had ruined myself and there was no fixing it. i thought she was going to hate me. fortunately, all of my worries were resolved by her saying it was okay.

the next time we used it was probably a half a month later and it worked better… to put it lightly. she did cum from it and that eased me up by a million. i still didn’t think id be able to use it as much as i wanted and with her i almost didn’t. i was too worried thinking that id be worst than the first time and each time we had sex i thought she’d view me in a way that i was unable to pleasure her. as time continued and i let that worry slip, build up my strength in my hips and my stamina, it got better.

that’s pretty much it i guess… im too lazy to go too much in depth but for people saying im a sex god… i wanted people to know that i most definitely was NOT one. i was a shy, eager and anxious dude and with that girl, i felt like my sex performance was the most lackluster… if you want any more stories about my experience… you can ask, im gladly willing to share.

#fern talks🍃

[blue-bujo]

Bowled Over (Roy Kent x Reader): Chapter Eight

You work at a bowling alley and a young girl named Phoebe has a birthday party there. You catch her uncle's eye.

Roy Kent x female reader

Will try to update roughly every two weeks

Chapter Eight: Roy Kent, Baby Whisperer

(7.2k words)

Warnings: Roy Kent-level language (you know what you're in for), insecurity, mentions of sex, tooth-rotting fluff

Summary: Roy takes a big step and asks you to come to a team dinner at Ola’s, where you get to properly meet the greyhounds and their families.

Author's note: Buckle in for a long one! This is to tide you over, because I probably won't be posting a new chapter in January; we've got family birthdays three out of the four weekends, so I don't want to stress about getting something out in time. Happy New Year, and I'll see you with a new chapter in a month!

You had great fun driving Roy’s SUV for the next few weeks. It was large and expensive, so people tended to give it a wide berth. And since you didn’t have to walk to work, you were getting to sleep a bit later, which was doing wonders for you.

It was amazing that Roy let you use the Beast without any hesitation, that he trusted you that much. That he wanted to spend time with you, and keep you around, and know you deeper. Things were going very well between the two of you.

Lettie was completely invested. She wanted to know every single detail, and had done her homework on Roy once you’d revealed that he was a public figure. She’d questioned every single text and phone call that made you smile during a shift, demanding to know exactly how Roy was treating you right. You’d even caught her telling the other members of staff that you were dating “a football legend.”

Roy had gotten a kick out of that when you’d told him one date night. It was at your favorite restaurant, a little hole-in-the-wall Italian place where he was unlikely to be spotted by paparazzi. Rumors were starting to swirl that he had a “mystery girl,” which both thrilled and terrified you, but thankfully no pictures had been sneakily snapped. Yet. You were still able to enjoy your anonymity, laughing and twirling pasta with the man you’d been lucky enough to meet while you worked his niece’s birthday party.

“So let me understand this, she tried to tell Snack Bar James that he’d forever missed out on catching you because now your standards are too high for the likes of him?” Roy’s eyes were crinkled at the edges as he tried not to grin.

“Pretty much,” you laughed. “I think we were both relieved. Lettie’s been trying to set us up for the entire year he’s worked with us, but he’s obviously more interested in Ashley in the pro shop.”

“Still, that Lettie’s a fuckin’ savage,” said Roy, respect heavy in his gruff voice. Then he took a bite of his chicken parmesan and sighed happily, looking at you.

“What?” you asked.

“Nothing. Just- this is nice. Us. I’ve been enjoying myself.”

“That’s good to know, considering we haven’t really done anything. What with your knee and everything.”

You both glanced down to the offending appendage in its articulating brace. Roy would hopefully get the okay from physio the following week to begin putting weight back onto it and using it more normally, but you were enjoying being the chauffer for now. It leant itself to quiet days in, calm conversations and movie nights snuggled on the couch, sometimes with Phoebe as well. It was hardly any different from your quiet existence before, except you weren’t lonely anymore.

“You’re kidding about doing nothing, right?” The man put down his fork and trained his gaze on you. It was one of the things about him that you loved best; he made sure that those around him felt seen. “This isn’t nothing, it’s fucking everything. I get to be a normal bloke with you, hearing the petty gossip of normal people. I haven’t had this in pretty much my entire adult life. I love this.”

He paused, his mouth open like he wanted to continue the thought. Like he might want to say that he loved you, but he didn’t say anything more. It disappointed you more than you expected; you realized that you maybe cared more deeply for him than you thought. Maybe you loved him.

A grunt jolted you out of your thoughts. Roy was looking at you tensely.

“I just fucked that up. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

And it was you were confused by your own feelings, so it was okay that he was taking responsibility for acting on his. He reached for your hand and held it tight.

“I’m an idiot. I know. Can I make it up to you?”

Your attention piqued, you nodded. “Yes, you can. How are you making it up to me?”

You watched as he took a breath, sat up a little taller, and asked, “Come to a family dinner with me?”

“A family dinner?”

“Well, we call them family dinners. Sam started it. It’s really a team dinner.”

Up to now, Roy had kept his football life separate from his dating life. You were excited that he seemed ready for his circles to start converging.

“Are you really sure you want me to come?” you asked. “That’s a big step, Roy.”

“Yeah, I’m sure. The boys have a pool going on why my mood’s been so abnormal, and I’d love to prove them all wrong. They think it’s because I’m on painkillers or some shit.”

“Didn’t you tell them that you’re not taking anything stronger than Tylenol?”

“Of course I fucking did, but they didn’t believe me. What do you say? Want to help me prove them wrong?”

“I would love to help you prove them wrong, but only if I get a cut of the pool,” you giggled. “Considering I’m the cause of it, I deserve it.”

Roy rolled his eyes. “Fine, you get a cut of the winnings if you can convince any of those idiots to share with you. Happy?”

“Yes, very.”

“Fuckin’ right.”

The two of you smiled at each other over your pastas. You were happy, even more so that he wanted you to start meeting his team. He’d been very protective of them, and of you, and you suspected of himself in keeping his worlds apart. You could understand it; it was always more comfortable keeping things in their separate placed. But you were pretty excited that he deemed you worthy of introducing into another part of his life.

“What are team dinners like?” you inquired. Then you took a large bite of your dinner so he’d have to say more than two words.

“They’re fine,” grumbled the man in response. “Once a month we all go to Ola’s, and Sam has us try some new Nigerian dish he’s thinking about putting on the menu. Richard brings wine, because he’s fucking French, and the lads destroy a week’s worth of training with how much they eat. It’s nothing fancy. People bring dates if they’ve got any.”

“But not Roy Kent,” you pointed out. “The day he brings a date will be one for the books.”

“Hmm.”

If it was possible for a man to look nervous while eating chicken parm, Roy was doing it as he thought about bringing a girl to a team function. You smiled reassuringly at him and tapped his foot under the table with yours.

“It’ll be great. I’ve already met them anyway, so now it will just be a reintroduction, which is much less awkward,” you promised. “I’ve been meaning to catch Jamie for a few weeks now.”

“Why?”

“To thank him for chauffeuring you around on the days I work! He must really like you for him to do that, and I need to thank him for being good to you.”

Roy could obviously tell that you were trying to push his buttons, but took the bait all the same. “The only thing he is to me is a prick. Please don’t encourage him. He’s been trying to corner me in the car park for the past two weeks to see who’s been dropping me off. I’m trying to protect you from him for as long as possible.”

His logic made no sense. “By inviting me to meet him and the rest of your idiots?”

“Beat ‘em to the punch,” he said. “We do it on my terms instead of theirs, so I control the conversation. It’s tactics, just like on the pitch.”

You threw one last jab. “I thought Nate was the tactics man?”

Those expressive eyebrows scrunched down. “Fuck you, babe.”

You finished your meals, ordered dessert, and ended your date night. After dropping Roy off at his house, you went home to your flat. You fell asleep thinking about the team dinner, three nights away, and how lucky you felt to be getting more serious with the man who insisted he didn’t care about it but obviously wanted you to go with him. The man who wanted you.

The day of the team dinner, you pulled up to Nelson Road early. You and Roy had decided that it would be easier for both of you to be the first to the restaurant and have the attention spread out, rather than arrive together later and be bombarded by the entire team at once. You’d thought you’d timed it so that nobody would see you idling in the parking lot, but after a moment, you realized there was someone in the Aston Martin parked next to you.

It was Jamie Tartt, and he was sitting in the passenger seat of his own car waiting for you to notice him. Once you did, he hopped out and motioned for you to roll down the window.

“And what are you doin’ in Coach’s car?”

“Driving,” you quipped.

“Driving Coach’s car?” the man probed. “When Coach just so happens to have someone driving him around while his knee is unusable? And when there are rumors that he’s got a girl?”

You did your best to keep your face neutral. “I know, it’s quite a coincidence, but stranger things have happened. Coach Kent and I just happen to have the same taste in cars.”

It wasn’t a lie, just not wholly the truth. Now that you had driven the Beast for a while, you loved it. Jamie eyed you good naturedly and didn’t say anything else, content to lean in the window. You could see why Roy found him annoying at times, but also why he would probably die for him. His manner was so casual that he was completely disarming.

“What are you doing here, Jamie?” you questioned. “No one else is here, so training can’t be done yet.”

“Me? Nothin’. Just forgot me headband.”

Your eyes darted to the elastic currently holding back his floppy hair. Strands were flying away; it had obviously been there for a while. You raised an eyebrow to let him know you weren’t fooled by his lie.

He shrugged. “All right, you caught meh. I’ve been trying to catch Coach’s driver for weeks, but haven’t managed it until today. I was hoping the rumors were true about our old man finding a girlfriend, and I’m really glad it’s you.”

“Oh? Why?”

“Because it’s right, innit? He hasn’t looked at anybody the way he looked at you at the bowling alley. Not since Keeley, and that look was different.”

Keeley. The model, and previous girlfriend. You felt extremely insecure every time you thought about her with Roy, despite his insistence that you didn’t need to. “I don’t know about that. Keeley’s famous.”

With a scoff, Jamie challenged, “And do you think that matters to Granddad? He only does what he’s sure of. Anyways, he’ll be out soon, and I don’t want him to see me out here. I told him I were being sick so he wouldn’t ask any questions. Are you coming to family dinner tonight?”

Nodding, you replied, “Yes, but it’s a secret. You can’t tell the team. It’s going to be a surprise.”

“I won’t tell, swear down.” He started bouncing back and forth between both feet. “I better get back inside. I’ll see you tonight!”

“You sure will. Oh, and Jamie!” you called as he jogged away.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you for driving Roy on the days I can’t. We both appreciate it, even if he’s too tough to say anything.”

Jamie grew two inches taller under your praise. He pointed at you and smiled. “Oh, he definitely needs to keep you around. See yah, Splits!”

The young man bounced back into the stadium, leaving you to wait for Roy. You didn’t see the prick in Jamie the way Roy had described him to you, but then, you weren’t in charge of him. You supposed somebody that chipper could be a bit of a handful. But you were pleased; the first interaction with somebody know you were the girlfriend had gone well, and the information hadn’t even been a surprise. It boded well for tonight.

Roy was upstairs; you could hear the steady thumping of his crutches as he got ready for the dinner. He’d finally mastered navigating the stairs, thank goodness, so you didn’t feel the need to run back and forth grabbing clothes and toiletries for him. This gave you time to do your makeup. Admittedly, you didn’t need long, as you were pretty minimal when it came to painting your face, but you were nervous, and kept messing it up.

It wasn’t like you hadn’t met the team before, and your conversation with Jamie had gone well earlier today, but tonight was your public debut as Roy Kent’s girlfriend. After tonight, there was no going back. There would probably even be press hiding somewhere, waiting to be the first to confirm the news that Roy was seeing somebody new.

“What’re you doing? You’re staring into space?”

Roy’s gruff voice startled you, and you almost stabbed yourself with your mascara wand. You hadn’t heard him come downstairs, but his reflection in the mirror was leaning on the doorframe, like he’d been watching you for a little bit, his face soft.

“You are so quiet when you want to be, it’s scary,” you scolded, turning to face him. “Don’t sneak up on me like that.”

“Sorry. I don’t mean to be scary; it just happens.” He looked at you, a small smile curving his lips. “You look great.”

With a scoff, you told him “I look okay at best. I’m not done yet.”

Roy stepped closer and looked you up and down carefully. “No, you look done and you look incredible. Don’t change one thing. What the fuck has you so freaked out?”

“After tonight, there’s no hiding,” you said in a small voice. “If I make a bad first impression, or a photographer gets a picture of me mid-sneeze, or choking on my food or something, that’s it. I will forever be the idiot that you took pity on.”

“No, you’ll be the young and beautiful date of a washed-up old has-been.” Roy kissed the top of your head. “The team will go easy on you. Its me they’ll be fucking with.”

You looked up at him, hovering above your hair. “Do you promise?”

“I promise. Now finish up, so we can get going. I want to beat everyone there.”

“Okay. I’ll be out in a minute,” you said, turning back to the bathroom mirror. Roy’s reflection swung away on its crutches, and you quickly put on the rest of your mascara before pulling the green sweater over your head and doing your hair. When you walked into the living room a few minutes later, Roy was gazing up at you with the look that Phoebe called his heart eyes.

“Is that the same jumper you wore on our first date?” he asked.

“Yeah. I remember you liked it, but I don’t have to wear it if it’s not right.”

“It’s perfect,” said Roy fondly. “They’ll all love you.”

You both walked to the car, and Roy put on his cheesy pump-up playlist for you. It only got through a few songs before you arrived at Ola’s, but it had the desired effect, and you were less anxious about the impending ordeal.

Roy was looking around as you parked the Beast. “I don’t see any of their cards,” he grunted. “Let’s get inside while we’re still in the fucking clear.” He reached toward you and squeezed your hand. “Ready?”

Squeezing back, you braced yourself and hopped out. Sam Obisanya’s restaurant, Ola’s, was a cute little corner unit deeper than it was wide. Airy curtains obscured most of the dining room from outside view, but you could see inside enough to know that you and Roy were the first ones there, as planned. Two people were bustling in the back when you opened the door for Roy, and while one ducked into the kitchen, the other approached.

“Coach!” called Sam, smiling widely. “Welcome! I’m so glad you could make it, although we’re not quite ready for everyone yet.”

Roy was obscuring you from Sam’s view while you followed him in. “Wanted to make sure that the close parking spots would be open, so we came early.” Your boyfriend stepped to the side as he said “we,” and pulled you to him.

Only for a moment, Sam faltered, then his eyes lit up as he recognized you, and realized the rumor about his coach was true.

“You’re the lady from the bowling alley!”

“Guity,” you chuckled, extending a hand to properly introduce yourself, but before you could do that, Sam took it in both of his and shook it warmly.

“I am so very glad that you are here, and that you are with Roy! What is your name?”

Roy introduced you before you could respond, and the sheer amount of pride in his voice made your heart melt a bit. He was acting like he didn’t deserve to be on your arm, not the other way around. And he was smiling, unashamedly.

“I am so glad to officially meet you,” beamed Sam, “and so glad that Coach gets to be with someone so lovely. I do hope that you enjoy yourself tonight.”

“I’m sure I will. Thank you, Sam. If the food is as good as the restaurant looks, I’m in for a treat.”

“Do you want to sit down, babe?” Roy gestured to a table in the corner, out of view of the door.

After a last smile at Sam, you joined Roy. He practically threw himself into a chair, and then carefully stretched his knee out onto one of the extra seats.

“That didn’t go so badly, as far as introductions go,” you told him.

The man grunted. “Sam is the golden child of the team. I wasn’t worried about him. It’s the other ones that’ll be idiots about it.”

The other ones showed up shortly thereafter. From your corner, you and Roy watched the team slowly trickle in. Coach Shelley and his fiancée were the earliest, and both lit up when their gazes settled on you. Jade planted herself next to you and told you how happy she was that there would be another girl there to talk to when Roy and Nate inevitably started talking tactics. You liked Jade; she could hold her own.

Some of the second team came in next. They all greeted you warmly, and heaped verbal abuse on Roy for taking so long to settle down. One of them, Paul, was the oldest on the team since Roy’s retirement, and promised you a few stories of their time playing together before his daughter pulled him away.

The defenders and midfielders arrived together, minus Jan Maas, who was apparently late to everything. Isaac McAdoo shook your hand seriously.

“He’s good to you, yeah?” he asked.

“Of course I’m fucking good to her!” Roy spluttered. “You’ve known me for years!”

“It’s always the ones you think you know,” Isaac said darkly. He looked you in the eye, still holding your hand. “If he ever stops being good to you, you call me and I’ll fuck him up for you. You’re at a family dinner, so you’re one of us now.”

“I’ll let you know if that ever happens,” you promised, trying your hardest not to laugh at how Roy was gripping one of his crutches like he was going to hit Isaac with it. The captain wisely moved out of reach before that could happen.

Most of the team didn’t seem all that surprised to see you. You saw a few bank notes changing hands throughout the course of the night, but everyone was more or less calm about you being there. Roy even halfway relaxed, until Jamie came in with Jan Maas in tow.

“The dinner can start now, ‘cos the party’s arrived!” he called as he came in, arms wide. “Splits! What are you doing here?”

Jamie was acting like your parking lot conversation had never happened. He plopped down next to Roy and stared at him cheekily. “Coach, I’m surprised at yah. Keeping a lovely lady all to yourself? Not cool.”

“And why should I have to share every fucking detail of my life with a prick like you? You’d only make a huge deal out of it and lord it over the whole team that you knew something about me that no one else did, and then no one would leave me the fuck alone.”

“Roy,” you interrupted, sensing that the rant would have been a long one, “Jamie already knows. He saw me driving your car when I came to pick you up.”

Eyes narrowing, Roy could only growl. You and Jamie grinned at each other.

“I think it’s great, man. You needed some happiness in your life, and she seems to be giving it to you. We all knew something was going right for you, and it definitely wasn’t your knee.”

Your boyfriend’s nostrils flared once, but then he looked at you and softened, just the slightest bit.

“All right, fair enough,” he admitted. “Life isn’t terrible right now, even with my shit knee.”

“She must be special, to make you that happy. You aren’t having any sex right now with your knee like that,” deadpanned Jan Maas.

There were shouts. Half the team jumped out of their chairs anticipating a fight. You reached out to grab Roy’s shoulder, as did Jamie, you noticed. Bad knee or not, you wouldn’t put it past Roy to lunge at the taller man after a comment like that. He had already grabbed one of his crutches and was brandishing it like a club.

Coach Shelley was talking the team, and the dutchman, down. “That was uncalled-for, even for you, Jan. There are ladies present.”

“You don’t need to worry about me, Coach. I can handle it,” Colin Hughes joked. It made everyone else relax, but Roy was still furious.

“I’ll kill him. I swear to God, I’ll fucking kill him.” His growl certainly sounded murderous. “Embarrassing you like that.”

“I’m not embarrassed,” you liked. “You told me he could be rude.”

Jamie shook his head disapprovingly. “Rude and Dutch. That was mental. He’s lucky our old man here is laid up.”

“I could still kick his ass, just let go of me!”

“How about some dinner?” Sam shouted over the din in his dining room. “Simi and I have some new dishes for you all to try.”

“Shouldn’t we wait for the Beards?” someone from second team asked.

“Who knows when they’ll show up?” someone else called sarcastically. “Queenie probably pitched another fir, and they’re never on time anyway.”

You looked to Roy. “Queenie?”

A growl; Roy seemed incapable of speech as he glared at Jan Maas. Jamie answered your question.

“Coach Beard’s daughter. They named her after the chess piece. Poor babeh hasn’t forgiven them for it. She’s always screaming.”

A few of the men loudly agreed that dinner should be served before Coach Beard and his family arrived so everyone else would be able to eat in peace. You weren’t sure that any team function could be considered “peaceful,” but agreed that dinner shouldn’t wait. Sam and his chef Simi – you couldn’t figure out whether they were dating or not – brought out countless platters of delicious food, and you all dug in. With every bite, you found yourself falling in love with Nigerian cuisine. Even Roy’s bad mood couldn’t stand up to it, and soon he was listening intently to the conversations around him, his hand on your knee under the table.

You quickly learned that not many people kept to one seat. Higgins and O’Brien found their way to your table to learn more about bowling from you, and you spent an enjoyable few minutes talking strategies, moreso for O’Brien’s benefit than Higgins’. The reserve keeper had enjoyed the team bowling night so much that he was considering joining a league. You would have been happy gushing about your sport all night, since everybody at work had already heard everything you had to say, and O’Brien was willing to listen. Higgins, too; you learned that he was registered for a tournament that you were also competing in at your alley, and he wanted to know which oil patterns were going to be laid. But your conversation was cut short when the door to the restaurant opened, and a screaming toddler was dragged in by her parents.

You recognized Coach Beard; he was often shown next to Roy during match broadcasts. The woman with him must be his wife Jane, who Roy had told you was slightly insane, but in a different way than Beard was. The two-year-old looked more like Jane, and was crying as only an unhappy toddler could. Half of the team looked sympathetically at Beard, Roy included, and the other half looked annoyed. Queenie didn’t seem to be popular.

She didn’t stop crying and whining. For twenty minutes, the Beards, and eventually everybody else, tried to cheer her up while they ate, but it was useless. People started scooping her up and passing her around, just trying to keep her occupied long enough for her to forget she was upset.

It didn’t work.

People were starting to get antsy, looking at the exit as if contemplating how quickly they could reach it. Wives and girlfriends were still trying to soothe Queenie, while Beard and Jane scarfed down a meal. Jade reached out for a turn, and put her purse in front of the girl to distract her. You would be the next victim if Jade couldn’t calm her down.

Unfortunately, digging through a purse wasn’t what Queenie wanted. She looked like she was gearing up for another fit. The adults at your table exchanged glances.

“Does anybody have a better idea?” challenged Jade.

You could only shrug. The only children you had in your life were the kids in the youth league, and they were older. Toddlers didn’t make any sense to you. Nate also seemed to be at a loss. After waiting a moment, Roy let out a sigh and rolled his eyes.

“All right, give her here,” he grumbled, holding out his hands. “Don’t any of you know any kids? Fucking amateurs, all of you.”

Once he had Queenie, Roy stood her up in his lap, holding her up by her hands. They looked at each other seriously, as if acknowledging each other’s existence. Roy did the same thing with you, you realized; every time he spent time with you, he ignored his surroundings to focus on you. Then Roy lowered her hands, and rather than stand on him, the toddler chose to snuggle up on him, her front pressed against his chest. He wrapped an arm around her and tucked his chin into her curls, which she’d wedged under his head.

Ola’s was silent. Mouths hung open in shock, eyes stared at the manager. He glared at everybody.

“What are you all staring at?”

“She stopped,” Beard said, awestruck. “She hasn’t stopped in days.”

“You’re the fuckin’ baby whisperer,” chuckled Jamie.

“You’re forgetting about Phoebe. She was small once. I learned with her.”

Roy was speaking to the room, but he was looking at Queenie burrowed into his chest. There was something so gentle in the way that he was with her; you hadn’t even seen it with Phoebe, maybe because she was older. It was like he was marveling at her, or in her willingness to trust him. Seeing this gruff man melt made you fall a little deeper for him.

The team was stunned at this peaceful side of their coach. Across the dining room, Beard and Jame were having a hushed conversation. Roy was choosing to ignore all of them; he was focusing on Queenie, who was starting to look like she was going to fall asleep as he rubber her back.

“Incredible,” Nate murmured. “I didn’t know you had this in you, Roy.”

“No reason to let it out at Nelson Road,” he grunted. “Now shut up. She’s not going to stay quiet if you idiots wake her up.”

Rather than say anything else, the assistant coach went to another table with Jade. Jamie followed suit, leaving you with Roy and Queenie.

“She really trusts you, Roy,” you observed quietly.

“Hmm.”

“Any reason why? Have you babysat her before?”

“No. I think she can tell that I’m just as scared of the world as she is, and she takes some comfort in that.”

“Roy Kent is scared? What does Roy Kent have to be scared of?”

Your boyfriend finally tore his eyes from Queenie to look at you.

“Roy Kent the footballer wasn’t scared of anything. But Just Roy… He’s effing terrified of life after football, and how great it’s turning out to be, and how much could be lost if he effs it up.”

It was startlingly honest. You’d never heard Roy that open before, even when it was just the two of you. Kids were apparently his weakness, which kind of made sense. He was fiercely protective and took care of everybody he cared about; children needed caring for more than adults did, so he probably felt even more himself while he had someone small to protect. Plus, he apparently related to how he thought kids viewed the world, which probably contributed even more to his being comfortable enough to share.

Your thoughts were moving too fast and with too much emotion for you to articulate anything, so you reached out to gently play with Queenie’s hair. Roy, his chin still in those curls, snuck a quick kiss onto your hand and smiled contentedly at you. It would have been a tender moment, had Jane and Coach Beard not chosen it as their moment to approach. Some of the usual grumpiness settled back onto your boyfriend’s face once he noticed them.

“Roy,” Jane began in what could only be described as a wheedling tone.

“What do you want?”

“We were hoping we could ask you to watch Queenie for a bit. You’re so good with her, and she’s been so difficult the past few weeks…”

Beard interrupted. “We’ve got to do some stuff around the apartment, and it will be a whole lot easier without a 25-month-old screaming the entire time.”

“It will only be about an hour,” continued Jane. “We’ll be quick.”

They looked pleadingly at Roy, who rolled his eyes. He didn’t have to think for long.

“Fine, but only because she’s effing asleep, and because I’m still injured, which are two very good reasons for me not to move.”

“Thanks, Roy,” said Beard. “We’ll be quick.”

“Effin’ hope so. If you’re not back in an hour, like you said, I won’t be doing the training reports for the rest of the month, you will. That’s my condition.”

“Deal.” Coach Beard took his wife’s hand. “We appreciate this, Roy.”

There was a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “You’re wasting valuable time. Now scram.”

You heard something that could almost be a laugh come from Roy as he watched the could run off.

“What are you laughing about?”

“I just got out of a month’s worth of reports,” he chuckled smugly. “It’s a ten minute trip to their flat, if they run the whole way, and they won’t. They can’t keep their hands off each other.”

“So you just agreed to babysit a difficult toddler for who knows how long, just to get out of doing some paperwork, because you know your coworker would be distracted by his wife?”

“Pretty effing smart, right?”

Roy was quite pleased with himself. He even kept conversation up for a few minutes more than usual before he let it die, and by then, Sam and Simi were bringing out the next course. Yor table was given a wide berth – nobody wanted to risk waking Queenie – but you and Roy were fin with that, and enjoyed having a break from everyone’s attention.

Until Dani Rojas walked over.

“Hola, Roy! Have you seen Coach Beard?”

At this point, it had been well over an hour since he and Jane had left.

“No, they went home to get some things done without Queenie in the way.”

“Oh. So you are babysitting, yes?”

With a suspicious look at you, Roy answered, “Yeah. Why are you fu- effing asking?”

“No reason, really. Mostly, I wanted to tell you how good it is to see you and Señora Splits here together. You look like a real familia, sitting here with the little Queen.”

You felt some color rise to your cheeks, and saw how Roy shifted his weight uncomfortably. First Jan Maas bringing up the sex thing, and now Dani Rojas bringing up a family, kids! This team definitely wasn’t shy.

“Oh! I apologize, you just started dating. These topics are probably uncomfortable, yes?” Dani glanced between you and Roy apologetically, reacting to your reactions. “I’m sorry. Please, forgive me.”

“Dani,” growled your boyfriend as he put his hands over Queenie’s little ears, “fuck off. Now, please.”

The striker retreated back to his original seat, which left you and Roy alone again. You subconsciously started twisting a ring you always wore, your mind racing as you contemplated everything. Did you want kids? You’d never really had the urge, unlike the girls you’d grown up around, who’d had baby names picked out by the age of twelve. Nothing specifically bothered you about kids, but you’d never been in a hurry to have any. But seeing Roy in front of you, murmuring softly to Queenie…

Maybe, with the right person, domestic bliss wasn’t unattainable.

“What’re you thinking about? You’re doing your ring twisting thing.”

You weren’t ready to have this conversation yet. Not here, where a footballer could interrupt at any second. You chose to ask your own question instead.

“What were you saying to Queenie just now?”

“I was saying sorry for swearing, just in case she heard me tell Dani to eff off.” The corners of his mouth were threatening to turn upwards. “I’ve been trying so hard all night not to corrupt this baby the way I’ve corrupted Phoebe, but at some point, you have to say it.”

“I was wondering why you were censoring yourself,” you smiled. “It’s been strange.”

“Yeah. Not how I expected my night to go, but it’s been all right. My knee’s killing me from having this one in my lap all night, and I need to use the toilet, but other than that.”

“Where are the Beards? It’s been closer to two hours. You should try to get two month’s worth of reports out of it.”

The twinkle returned to Roy’s eyes as he realized the genius of your suggestion. Then he shifted Queenie higher, probably to relieve some pressure from his knee.

“Knowing those two, they’re probably all over each other. Hopefully not making another of these little gremlins, because they don’t give enough attention to the one they already have.”

“Do you think it’s an attention issue?” you asked. “She’s had attention all night.”

Before he answered you, Roy let out an aggravated sigh. “No, she’s been handled all night. None of that lot actually interacted with her, they just passed her around trying to distract her. Kids are people, too, you know. They want to feel included the same way adults do. Honestly, babe, you coach youth bowling, how do you not know this?”

“I guess I’m just good at seeing them in the context of bowling, where it’s my job to watch after them,” you mused. “But I may not be a natural like you.”

You expected the man to respond with something sarcastic, but he looked thoughtfully at Queenie once more. As did you. As much as you didn’t want to have the conversation here in the open, seeing him so comfortable with her felt like it might be a small glimpse at a future. The two of you hadn’t been together long – only six weeks – but it was serious, and future wasn’t out of the question for you.

Gradually, you felt Roy’s gaze on you. All harshness was dissolved from his face.

“I know you don’t want to talk about this in public, and I’m with you on that, but I want you to know… I don’t hate this. I think I’ve known since Phoebe was born, but I hadn’t really thought about it until my career went up in flames and I had to effing retire. I think I want a family to take care of. Kids. Or just one, I don’t know. But I need you to know that before we fu- effing go any further. We can talk about it later, when you’re ready. If you’re ready. You don’t have to be, and if it was too early to say, I’m really sorry. I can be –“

“Roy, stop.” His voice was getting high and strained, and he had yet to take a breath; you had to make him stop to breathe. “I think it may be something I want, too. It’s okay.”

And it was, you realized. The man in front of you, holding the toddler that wasn’t yours, could be something very serious. He’d taken a chance on you, somebody decidedly outside his world, and brought you in. He’d given you his trust and his weakness, and become a steward of yours. He was the baby whisperer. He could be the endgame.

It was all so simple. He could be it. And he seemed to think that you might be it, too.

“Oi, take Queenie for a second.” Always abrupt, Roy seemed to be switching topics. “I can’t stand it anymore; I have to get up before I piss myself, and before my good knee locks up.”

You held your hands out, and Roy passed you a drowsy toddler. You made sure to acknowledge her before she settled, as he had, and she didn’t fuss as she nestled into you, using one of your boobs as a pillow. Roy was already stumping away towards the back of the restaurant, and the team was busy passing around a dessert, so you were alone with your thoughts. It may have just been biology, or attraction, or the fact that sex had been reference more than once tonight, but cradling a sleepy little kid that had been handed off to you by the man you were currently seeing was doing something to your insides. A yearning was suddenly there. You could imagine a tiny, foul-mouthed menace running amuck.

Roy was it.

Roy was so distracted that he hadn’t noticed he was washing his hands with sanitizer until it found a paper cut. He swore and corrected his mistake, then looked his reflection dead in the eye in the mirror.

The man hadn’t seen himself wear this expression before. In the press, he’d always looked angry, all hard angles and glares. Having Queenie all night had melted it all away, and Just Roy, staring back at him looked… Fond? He wasn’t sure. It was something soft.

He reached for a paper towel to dry his hands, his mind spinning. Taking care of Queenie all night had ignited something warm in his chest, which felt suspiciously like his heart. But it wasn’t really about Queenie, was it?

No, it wasn’t. It was about the woman who’d been beside him, who hadn’t flinched through this whole night. And its many twists, turns, and blunt footballers. Splits had exuded grace all night, and he hadn’t consciously noticed until this moment how peaceful his normally-raging thoughts were whenever he was with her.

Just Roy was wearing heart eyes when he looked back in the mirror.

“Fuck. She’s the one.”

As he hobbled out of the toilets and back to the table, Roy knew with more certainty than he’d ever had in his life. He wanted to serve her, to protect her, to have her, to love her. For her to hold his kids as gently and tenderly as she was holding Queenie right now, who hadn’t even noticed the return of her parents.

Fuck being Roy Kent. He wanted to be Just Roy with her. Splits was it.

She smiled up at him when he got closer.

“Better?”

Why was she asking if he was better? Oh, right, his quick retreat to the toilets, which had been a bit of a lie because he’d needed to get his emotions in check more than he’d actually needed to go.

“Yeah, much better, thanks. How was Queenie?”

“An angel,” Splits answered. “You’re onto something with this whole acknowledgement thing. I was just telling the Beards.”

Jane was wearing an irritated expression, probably mad that other people were telling her how to manage her own child. Beard just looked thankful that said child wasn’t currently screaming. They both looked red and puffy around the mouth. Roy was pretty sure that they’d been making another fucking gremlin, and to his surprise, was insanely jealous.

Fuck, he was falling hard. It scared him how intensely sure he was that Splits was the one.

He had to get out. It was too much, being around his team, his family.

“Are you ready to go?” he questioned, more harshly than he’d meant to.

She shrugged. “Yeah, we can go. Is your knee bothering you?”

“Something like that. Beard, you were gone for two hours, not one, so I’m expecting two months of training reports.”

Coach Beard was nothing if not fair. As he took his daughter from Splits, he nodded stoically. “Fine. You held up your end.”

“Well said.”

Roy pulled out his girlfriend’s chair and turned for the exit. He’d wanted to sneak out, but the whole team saw them leaving and called out goodbyes. Sam, of course, thanked them for coming. Jamie, less predictably, shouted, “Good night, Kents!”

In his peripheral, the manager could see Splits was stifling a smile and waiting for his reaction. Roy didn’t correct Jamie, only flipped him off without turning around. He ushered his girl out of Ola’s to the Beast, then turned on one of his playlists. He texted his father as she drove them home.

Me: Need to talk. Call tomorrow?

Dad: About fucking time. Your mother’s upset you haven’t told us.

Me: ???

Dad: typing…

After a moment, his father sent a link to a post on The Sun’s social media. It was a photo, sniped through the window of the restaurant, of him in profile holding Queenie and kissing Splits’ hand as she played with the little girl’s hair. They’d been caught, but he fought down the anger rising in his throat. He typed out one last message.

Me: It’s new, but she’s fucking amazing. Do you still have Nan’s stuff?

With that, he closed his texts and pocketed his phone. He reached over for Splits’ hand, resting on the center console while she waited for the light to change, and took it.

It was missing a vital piece of jewelry. He needed to fix that.

Tag list: @preciousbabypeter @harry-bowie-mercury @amieinghigh @onceuponaoneshot @chewymoustachio @my-neurodivergent-world

#roy kent bowled over #roy kent #roy kent x reader #ted lasso #ted lasso fanfiction #mutual pining #slowish burn #reader is a bowler #because I was a bowler #hence the terrible pun title #my writing #no editing we die like men

[girlhorse]

I understand you might not want to share, but if you dont mind, what happened? no judgment of course shit happens

under cut bc its long and boring kinda but i need to vent lol

it's like... literally nothing. not even interesting really. when i got hurt last week it was while breaking company safety policy - in the salon I'm in, literally everyons breaks several policies daily, bc our manager doesn't enforce them and most of us including me don't know the actual rules because of this. I got "caught" essentially because i got injured, so now my boss has been giving me so much shit for it. I'll concede that i knew i was breaking the rules leading up to the incident, but it was a rule i thought was "safe" to break in that particular salon bc i was told it was ok by another employee that worked there.

fwiw i still don't think what i did caused the incident to occur, they are only related in that they happened close together. and it doesnt matter if they're not related bc corporate will see them as related either way

on top of this my boss since i started has been really hard on me for seemingly no reason. She called me rude & irritating to my face many times, which stopped after we had a meeting with the gm. she consistently has accused me of things i havent done and has it in her head that I'm slow at my job and incompetent.

I struggle to understand what she wants from me. Recently I left late due to being stuck on a difficult groom that was taking a long time, ans her response was to accuse me of purposely staying late (again mind you) in order to make more money ig. She then continued to threaten me with retraining. today i left on time despite having a busy day, after asking her if she wanted me to stay and clean or if she wanted me to clock out. she told me to clean my station and leave. i did that and I left, and after i left she got mad that i didnt clean and asked me to come back to clean which regrettably i did go back to do like..off the clock lol.

today was the first time ive worked with her since i got injured and since she became like... mad at me about it idk. and shes been kind of being snippy more than anything..i literally had a nightmare about working today last night bc I've been so out of my mind anxious all weekend (her way of communicating that I'm in trouble is to just hint at a looming meeting, tell me shes unhappy and like let me fuckin simmwr with rhat for hours or days) and while she disnt outright yell at me or anything today she just kept making snide remarks or criticizing me constantly, not just privately but in front of others too. today was just so busy and i was anxious and fawning the whole damn day because of it and im exhausted. i worked so hard and did my damn best to please her like..almost subconsciously. i felt like i was dissociating. i was very anxious all day and frazzled and had trouble focusing. it ended up getting me in trouble during closing too.

its just really frustrating bc it only seems to happen to me. My othsr coworkers stay late with her on busy days. and i feel confused about what she expects from me.

#anonymous #ask #im paranoid that im including too many details idk #also she like. asks my coworkers about me behind my back and never comes to me about concerns i have lol #like she asked coworkers abt mt finger breaking before she talked to me about it. i fucking hate it

[prestonmonterey]

TLT UPDATE!! BEFORE I GO TO BED

(gods im so tired...)

@vincentaureliuslin @tatsumisheep3

no photos today so heres my cat :P

OPENING NIGHT!!! it went super well!!!!! (i think)

it was PA night so the understudys were percy and annabeth and they killed it!!!!!! :DDDD

also my director gave me a compliment today so im in a good mood (it was somethin along the lines of "you finally did a good job as cerberus" but ill take what i can get...) (i still have beef with him but.. whatever....)

its crazy how fast this show is going and that itll all be over after sunday,, but also i am SO tired bc we literally spend more time at school than at home this week :(

also getting a lotta acne bc im not used to wearing this much make up every day :P

but hey at least ill get to rest a teeny bit on the weekend (just in the morning TwT bc we have matinees)

also my parents and some of my friends are comin tomorrow so they BETTER FUCKIN BUY ME CANDY (i really really really want candygrams... one of the stage managers got like 4 boxes of candy i am so jealous...)

also also also we did the legacy robe last night before preview night and my friend (and mother /ij) got it :DDDD very happy for her

um um um i felt like i had more to say but idk this is already a lot and i cant remember things im kinda tired :P

oh i finally got my camper necklace!!! the beads were missing for like a week but they were just on the table in the costuming room... anyway my friend made it for me during tech class bc shes so so sooo sweet <3 (while i was in math trying to force my friend to study... *stares at neeks* /aff) i got four beads that kinda almost make the ace flag!! (black for tech, silver for the fall play, light blue for this show, and purple for my grade)

idk if i explained it before but all of our necklaces represent how much theater we've done,,, bc its kinda like how long we've been at camp. theres a bead for each grade based on our class colors, and the tlt bead, so everyone gets at least 2. theres also beads for each of the past musicals and plays at school, and a black bead if youve done tech, and a white bead if youve done leadership :D some of the seniors have like most of their necklace filled because of how many shows theyve done

heres another cat pic to keep you engaged and reading this /hj

also also also many many thanks to my wonderful actor and tech friends i would not survive without them (especially thanks to tech bc they have to put up with us actors... /hj) its poseidon's actors first show i think and they have a LOT of quick changes so their section of the rack is,,, kind of a mess. also the lamp for the oracle scene has broken multiple times i think already... and i already left my make up bag out yesterday and my watch in the cubbies today TwT we are a hot mess

my graphic design teacher was acting today :D (the farmer in drive is a teacher role, and they switch out every night) and i love him being so absolutely perplexed by the energy circle before show :333

also i remembered to put setting powder on for the first time,,, and... i forgot that my mom is SO much paler than me TwT (i was very washed out...) so ill probably stick to spray for the rest of the week :P

sorry i really am rambling tonight...

ok i will probably hopefully do at least one more update after strike on sunday!! (depending on how tired i am,, i might just curl up on the floor and sleep after the sunday show actually...) unless something goes horribly wrong,,, then ill probably post about it too

good night!! i need to collapse in bed and try to save up enough energy for tomorrows show :3

have a wonderful day/night and remember to hydrate! (or you'll die straight...)

#marble musings #tlt update

[livelovesimallways]

The Weekend Pt. 3......

(Previous)

It’s been nearly two months since things went down between me, my sister and Sean. Dana forgave him for messing with Julia and despite my best efforts, he went back home. While they moved on and continued planning their wedding, I distanced myself again. Opening up those old wounds made me bitter, angry and hell bent on making sure I got my "lick back". I didn’t care what it cost, Sean had to pay for breaking my heart. I wanted to confess everything to Dana sooner but I realized doing it during that time wasn't the way to go. Humph,  with how I was feeling, something misdirected and reckless surely would have come out my mouth. Now that I’ve calmed down, I’m ready to tell her all of it. Even though Sean is the catalyst for this, Dana has a right to know. It’s going to hurt without my sister in my life, but I put myself in this position. Damn...We really do reap what we sow.

The Following Week.....

"Shit! Girl, you scared me." I said, trying to catch my breath.

"My bad...Just making sure you're good. I mean, the way you ran out the kitchen..."

"I know, I know...I'm fine though. Thanks for lookin out."

"Of course...But umm, are you sure you're good? You've thrown up almost every day for a week now."

"Yeah, but you know how sensitive my stomach is. I've been eating too much dairy. Plus the smell of eggs always makes me nauseous, it just got to me today."

"I understand that but..."

"But what? What are you trying to say?"

"It might be morning sickness."

"Look, I appreciate your concern but it's not possible."

"Nothing is one hundred percent, Dee. Your sugar daddy may be older but I'm sure he still has swimmers."

"Okay eww, he ain't that old. He's fifty but the odds of that happening are less than one percent." I said, doing a cutting motion.

"Well still, if you wanna check I have some tests upstairs. Don't ask." *both snickering* "You gone find out either way so..."

"Fine ho, I'll do it." I laughed, rolling my eyes.

"I don't know why I'm so nervous...Did it come up yet?"

"........."

"Mimi??"

"Ummm, Yeah...It's positive."

"Positive??? Nah, that can't be right." I said, grabbing the test in complete disbelief. "Fuck!...Maybe it's a false result."

"A false positive?? You're my bestie but..."

"I know. This is fuckin crazy though. I swear he definitely had a vasectomy. I was even nursing him back to health. "

"Seems like you were doing more than that." *smirking*

"This is not the time, Mimi." I said, smiling although fearful and in shock.

Trying to make sense of this, I started to put together a timetable in my head. I thought about how long I've missed my period, how long I've been feeling sick and who I've had sex with. As my stomach sank, Mimi asked question, reminding me of the shit storm that is to come.

"Are you still having your sister over later or is that off the table?

To Be Continued..........

Next

#black simblr #sims story #sims 3 story #ts3 story #dana #deanna #mimi #new story name #the weekend

[tinyboxxtink]

"Spring Break '86" *Chapter 14*

Chapter 15

Chapter 13

ALRIGHT GUYS, this is it.

This is the last chapter before Part 2. And I've already changed the ending. Lulz.

I said this in another post, i really don't know what's gonna happen over the weekend.

If Eddie dies [god forbid] in Vol 2, i don't know how i'll react. It might fuel me to make this the best damn fix-it-fic of all time, or it might throw me in a spiral of despair, unable to finish this.

No no, i'm kidding. Mostly. I will finish this no matter what, but if he does it might take me a few days to recover.

SO I posted this today because either way, it will probably be about a week before you get the next chapter. I'm sorry, please don't leave me in that time!

I'm also sorry this chapter isn't super long, but I was running out of plot leading up to the ending of Vol 1 , and I didn't wanna just start writing bullshit to fill up pages. That's not fair to anyone.

SO, here we are. I hope you all enjoy my interpretation of the ending, even though I flipped who gets stuck in the UD.

Which honestly shouldn't be that different because all the trailers we've seen she's been FINE, so obviously she gets out of the UD pretty fast.

Oh PS-- Per usual, i highly recommend listening to this song before/after/during your reading. I cannot believe I didn't use this song earlier, it's so fucking accurate.

But better late than never, right?

PPS--- Okay like 3 or 4 screen names don't work in my tag list. If they are yours, please tell me what I did wrong. Otherwise i'll give the spots to other people.

Alright here we go!

-------

You and Eddie had decided to head off towards the direction of his trailer, whether or not you’d make it. At least you had each other. 

“....You find it weird Vecna hasn’t said anything to us lately?” you asked him. 

“What are you doing?!” Eddie hissed as his eyes darted around frantically. “He could hear you!”

“Baby,” you gave him a look. “He can hear us no matter what, and he hasn’t said shit, like I said!” 

“Still,” he took your hands and continued to walk with you down the streets of Upside Down Hawkins. 

“But seriously!” “What else has got his attention?!” You asked again, looking up to the sky.

“Can we maybe not, think about the monster that’s going to kill us all right now? Focus on us?”

“Us?” You gave him a surprised smile. “There’s an ‘us’?”

“Are you for real right now, Princess?” he laughed sarcastically. 

“Well, you never exactly asked me to be your girlfriend, Munson,” you teased him with a tongued smile. 

“I proposed!” He reminded you.

“Almost proposed,” you clarified.

“I gave you a fuckin’ ring, Y/N,” He held up your hand, but the ring was gone. “What the--?”

“Oh my god,” You gasped, immediately looking around. “Oh my god, no--”

“Babe I’m pretty sure it’s long gone by now,” He put a hand on your shoulder. “Think about all the shit we’ve been through in the last two days,”

“Oh god,” you whimpered, realizing he was right. You stopped looking around and looked at him apologetically. “I’m so sorry Eddie,” 

“Hey, don’t be,” he pulled you into a tight hug, your head up against his chest. “It’s not your fault,”

“It was your favorite though!” you cried upseteddly. 

“Nahhhh, it definitely wasn’t,” he shook his head with a smile, holding out his right hand. “THIS is my favorite,” 

You recognized it immediately. 

“Eddie…” you bit your lip. “Y-You still have that?” 

“Are you kiddin’?” He laughs, kissing the top of your forehead. “It’s the best gift I’ve ever gotten,” 

-------------

Eddie’s 14th Birthday

“....Happy birthday dear Eddie, happy birthday to you!” 

“And many mooooreee,” you added with a giant flourish. 

“God be more lame, please,” Eddie blushes as he looks around the diner, making sure no one heard your god-awful singing. 

“Shut up and blow out your candles before you get wax on those pancakes!” you hit him softly. 

Two candles on a stack of pancakes wasn’t ideal for a birthday cake, but Eddie appreciated any effort you gave him. God knows no one else did. Eddie sighed and blew out the candles, to which you promptly started loudly cheering and clapping.

“Yaaaay!!!” you giggle as Eddie shoots daggers at you for making such a show of yourself. 

“I hate you,” he grumbled. 

“You love me,” you teased, but both of you stopped as soon as the words left your lips. You just stared at each other while Eddie tried to suss out how serious you were being, and you were mentally kicking yourself for even joking about it. 

“...Anyway,” he coughed awkwardly as he cut himself a bite of pancake. “You really didn’t have to do this, Y/N,” 

“Well of course I did Eddie,” you began cutting yourself your own piece. “It’s the last birthday I’ll have a chance to,” 

“You act like I’m going off to war, Princess,” He chuckled as he stuffed his face with pancakes. 

“High school is war Eddie,” you held out your fork making a point. “Everyone knows that,” 

“Right,” he rolled his eyes. 

“Shut up and open your present,” you took a small box from your purse and placed it on the table, sliding it towards him. 

“...I thought this was the present,” He gestures arounds the booth that had been decked out with balloons and streamers, and the Pan “Birthday” Cake. 

“Uh no, this is the party doofus,” you shook your head.

“Some party Princess,” he gestures around the empty booth.

“Well I can’t help it that people find you weird,” You pulled 

“US weird,” 

“Oh people like me fine,” you teased. “It’s just you,” 

“...Right,” he nodded with a small, soft laugh. “Well, I guess you’ll have a hell of a good time next year without me then, huh?” 

“Eddie,” you held out your hand, realizing you had stuck your foot in your mouth. “I didn’t mean it like--”

“Yeah I know,” he shrugged it off as he took the box from you. “So, what’s this? It’s pretty small. Spend too much money on the party--??”

He stops teasing you when he pulls out the ring. It shines brightly, reflecting the glow of the fluorescent lights of the diner. He looks at it for several seconds before speaking, just admiring it. 

“....You don’t like it,” You said softly.

“W-What?” He’s knocked from his trance. “No, I-I love it,” 

“Oh don’t patronize me Eddie--” You started to take it back. 

“No,” he grabs both of your hands, making you look at him. He looks more serious than you’ve ever seen him; he even looks like he might cry. 

“I love it, Y/N, It’s…it’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever gotten me,” he could barely whisper, refusing to cry in public.

“Really?” you bit your lip, doing your absolute damndest not to look at his lips at that moment. His hands holding yours with that look on his face, it felt like the most intimate situation you two had ever been in since you’d known him. 

“Really,” he rubs the tops of your hands with his thumbs, the ring already on his finger. “It’s like an elvish ring,” 

“Um….okay,” you smiled nervously, not understanding what he was saying, but not caring as long as your hands were in his.

You two just sat there in that booth, holding hands and looking into each other’s eyes.

“Eddie, I um--” This was it, you were going to tell him how you really felt. How you’d always felt. 

“Yeah…?” His eyes widened a bit, hoping you were going to make this the most perfect birthday by saying the words he’d waited to hear his whole life. 

“I--” 

“Y/N!!!” All of a sudden your little brother was calling your name. Eddie instantly dropped your hands and stuffed them back under the table.

“Shit,” you muttered as a ten year old Dustin came running up to the table. 

“Did you forget you were supposed to take me to the arcade or what?” Dustin whined. “I’m tired of sitting over there by myself,” 

“Dammit Dustin!!” you snapped at him. His eyes instantly went to those huge puppy dog size, big crocodile tears forming in his eyes. 

“....I’m sorry,” you sighed, ruffling his hair before giving Eddie an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, Eds. I need to--” 

“Yeah, yeah sure I get it,” he nodded in understanding, nodding at your brother. “Sup Dust?” 

“Yeah,” Dustin nodded back at him awkwardly. They didn’t really know each other yet. 

“Alright you, let’s go,” 

You scooted out of the booth and took your brother’s hand, giving one last longing look at Eddie 

who was now admiring his ring with a huge smile. 

------------

 “I should’ve said something then,” you sighed, running your hands through your hair. 

“Why are you doing this, Y/N?” Eddie asked you seriously.

“What?” Your eyebrows furrowed.

“Why are you forcing these trips down memory lane, when you know they all lead to the same place?” he elaborated.

“What are you--”

“You realize what all your little ‘memories’ have in common?” He snapped. “They’re all moments where we came ‘this’ close to being together, but inevitably one of us chickens out, or gets interrupted, or something else!”

“Well yeah but--” 

“I don’t wanna look back at that!” He kicked a rock angrily. “I don’t wanna focus on the fact that we could’ve been together so much longer, that we wasted all this time,”

“Eddie--”  

“No!” He shakes his head as he grabs your face. “What matters is that we know now. That we’re together now. That I love you, now,” 

“Oh just now?” you half laugh, trying to ease the tension. 

“You know what i mean, Y/N” he gave you a look.

“Yeah, I know…” you looked down as you played with your fingers.

“So what are you doing, huh?” he asked again.

“I don’t--” you looked up at him, confused.

“You wanna know what I think?” He answered his own question.

“I know you’re gonna tell me--” 

“I think you wanna bring these up so you can ‘atone’,” he accused. “You think that one of us or both of us is gonna die, and you wanna apologize and get everything off your chest before we do,” 

“Eddie…”

“And I’m not accepting that, do you hear me?” He moved his hands to your face. “I’m not letting you give up on me, not now. We’re not rolling over and accepting death. We’re gonna go make it to this portal and get the fuck out of here,”

“Baby…” 

“No!” He pressed his forehead against yours. “Knock it the fuck off,” 

“Okay okay,” you put your hands on his face now, trying to calm him down. 

“Good,” he sighed as you moved your hands to his neck, burying your face in his shoulder.

“So, what now?” you asked into his t-shirt.

“Whaddya mean ‘what now’?” He rolled his eyes at the question, stroking your hair while your face remained on his chest.

“Well what are we gonna talk about now, goof?” You shook your head with a laugh as you started to pull him along, resuming your journey. 

“Hmmmm, well--” He pretended to think. “Let’s talk about the future, y’know when we get out of here, which we will,” 

“Oh?” You smiled in amusement. “Thought you didn’t wanna talk about our imaginary kids,” 

“Okay we don’t have to go that far,”he blushed. “ Just like…y’know, after all of this,” 

“You mean, next week?” you clarified warily.

“....Maybe…” his voice sank, the reality of your situation sinking in. Even if you did both survive this, Vecna, the world ending; you still had to deal with the fact that technically you lived almost 200 miles away from each other.

“I don’t…” you played with his fingers interlaced with yours as you walked. “I don’t know…” 

“Yes you do,” he nodded his head sadly. “You have to go back to school,” 

“Well, yeah obviously,” you half laughed. 

“And you’ll just forget about me again, and I’ll see you when you graduate,” he added in a mopey tone.

“Seriously, Eddie?” You dropped his hand and stopped walking. “You really think--” 

“Well what else are you gonna do, huh Y/N?” he was suddenly getting very defensive, suddenly feeling as if walls were closing in on him.

“Okay first you don’t want me to start ‘atoning’ for mistakes, and now you’re accusing me of making more before they even happen?!” you had to laugh at the situation, it was ridiculous.

“No, but--”

“For fuck’s sake Eddie, I almost died for you! You really think I’m just gonna go home next week and forget the love of my life?” you gestured to your leg for emphasis.

“I just--” 

“I love you, Eddie Munso,” you pulled him close to you, stepping on a curb to be taller. “I love you, and I’m never letting you go again, do you hear me?” 

“Yeah…” he nodded softly.

“It’s me and you, okay?” You tugged on his shirt. “This is it,” 

“Alright so what do you think is gonna happen?” he challenged you, not fully accepting your cookie cutter solution.

“Well,” you pulled him on the curb as you started to walk again. “Why don’t you come with me?”

“To Chicago?” he laughed. “How am I gonna do that, if I’m in my millionth senior year?” 

“You realize there are things called GED’s, right babe?” you asked.

“Yeah, you think I don't know that?” he grumbled. “But I don’t wanna just give up,”

“Seriously?” You half laughed. “You’d rather sit here in Hawkins for another three months to prove something to people? You?” 

“Well, why not?!” he argued. “You don’t think I deserve to walk across that stage and flip off the principal?” 

“Eddie,” you rolled your eyes. “Come on,” 

“Come on what?!” he threw his hands up. 

“Why do you need to--” 

“Because everyone in this town thinks that I can’t do this, and I wanna prove them wrong!” He gestured wildly.

“Just now, all of a sudden?” you didn’t mean to laugh, but the thought was idiotic to you. 

“Excuse me?” he looked at you seriously offended.a

“Eddie you’ve been there three years longer than you’re supposed to be,” You half laughed. “Why now all of a sudden is it so--” 

“Wow,” he scoffed with a hurt laugh. “Wow, okay,” 

“Eddie come on--” you reached for him but he jerked away.

“NO,” He shouted. “I just want--” 

 “Why does it matter what anyone else thinks about you but me?” you exclaimed in distress.

“Because you weren't around, Y/N!” he barked back.

“Wha--” 

“I spent years trying to not care about what you thought of me, d’ya get that?” He laughed tearfully. “I spent years trying to downplay the shit you and your sheeple friends would say about me, do to me,” His blood began to boil just thinking about it. 

“So excuse me if your opinion isn’t going to be the ‘only one that matters’!” he sputters angrily.

“Eddie, I--”

“Y’know, honestly at this point your brother’s opinion should matter to me more than yours does!” he cut you off. “He’s been nothing but nice to me, hell he admires the shit out of me! Shouldn’t you want me to impress him? Set a good example to him by walking across that stage, not giving up?”

“Oh yeah, Eddie,” you laughed. “I really think you flipping off the principal after a lifetime of senior years is a great example--”

“SHUT UP!!!” He screamed, causing you to flinch. 

“Eddie--”

All Eddie could focus on in that moment was how condescending you were being. Telling him he was wrong, like you always did. Like how you always had. Like you always would be, until the day he died. 

“No, this is always what it comes down to, Princess,” he wasn’t backing down this time. “You think you’re better than me. You will always think you’re better than me. No matter what I do, or say, or how much you claim to love me, that will be always be true,” 

“No it won’t!” you protested.

“Yes it will!” He started to walk away from you. “We’re never gonna be on equal ground in your mind, ever,” 

“This isn’t you,” you trailed after him. “You know I’m not like that, not really,” 

“Maybe I do, and I’ve just been pretending you’re not because I was so idiotically happy that you finally seemed to feel the way that I have,” 

“That is so ridiculous--” you dismissed his thought.

“SEE?” He raised his voice again. “You’re still doing it!”

“Eddie you’re ridiculous,” he mocked you. “Eddie that’s stupid. Eddie you’re a fucking moron!” 

“I’m not saying that,” You jogged quickly to catch up to him and stopped him. “I’m saying listen to yourself: Two minutes ago you got pissed that I kept dragging up memories that I felt bad about. You got mad for me trying to-- atone, or whatever,” 

Eddie looked away, trying not to accept what you were saying. 

“And now I think I'm better than you? Th-That all of this has been some kind of sick prank? Like I have been risking my life for the past two days to just-- what, make you feel like a moron?”

Eddie knew you were right, deep down he knew that. But for some reason all he could think about was how cruel you had been to him in High School, how you had always been too good for him. That none of this was real. 

“I don’t wanna do this anymore--” He shoved past you and kept walking.

You knew what you had to do-- you knew this wasn’t Eddie This was Vecna, finally getting to him. It made sense since he had connected with him earlier, now he had a hold on him. But what were you going to do? You didn’t exactly have a band, or a record player. And you wondered if the same song would work on two people. 

Then you had an idea. 

“I can’t fight this feeling any longer…” you started to softly sing, making Eddie stop in his tracks. 

“And yet I’m still afraid to let it show.” You kept singing, tears choking your throat as you mentally willed him to turn and look at you. 

“What started out as friendship has grown stronger…” you started walking towards him. “I only wish I had the strength to let it show,”

The lyrics were so hauntingly accurate, you knew this could probably be your song. It was your song. And it was the song that was going to bring him back to you.

“I tell myself that i can’t hold out forever,” you walked closer, he still refused to look at you. “I said there is no reason for my fear,” 

“Yeah right,” Eddie mumbled with a sad laugh, Vecna’s voice still in his ears.

“Because I feel so secure when we’re together,” you were approaching him closely now, taking his hand softly as you stepped in front of him. 

“You give my life direction, you make everything so clear…” 

Eddie felt his anger shifting as he saw the sincerity in your eyes and truth in your words. 

“And even as I wander, I’m keeping you in sight,” he felt himself singing softly back to you, thinking about all the years you had lost. The years you were so close yet so far from each other. And deep down he knew he had never given up on you, not for one second. 

“You’re a candle in the window, on a cold dark winter’s night,” you took both hands in his now, sincerely meaning the words you were singing. 

He had always been a beacon to you, even when you had tried to deny it. He had always been there in the back of your mind, keeping you from ever being truly as awful as the rest of your ‘sheeple’ friends.

“And I’m getting closer than I ever thought I might…” you both sang together, holding tightly to each other’s hands now. 

God this song would’ve been so perfect to actually admit your feelings to one another before all of this bullshit had gone down. You could have stood up at your graduation and sang it to him. Hell, you could have stood up at any dance or school function and sang this to him. You could have announced to the world that you, Y/N, captain of the cheer squad, valedictorian, all american girl, were in love with Eddie Munson, the ‘freak’. 

“And I can't fight this feeling anymore. I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for,”   

You couldn’t believe how stupid you had been, trying to fight your feelings for him. For not fighting for him, for you, for the two of you. Why you hadn’t just said what you were really feeling, telling them to go to hell. But you were saying it now, and you were saying it to fight for him. Fighting for him against something far more nefarious than a bunch of white-bread Americana sheeple. 

You took his face in your hands, looking deep into his chocolate brown eyes as you sang the last line of the chorus, needing him to hear you more than ever.

“And if I have to crawl across your floor, come crashing through your door. Baby I can’t fight this feeling anymore,” 

WIth those words, Vecna’s hold on Eddie was relinquished. He grabbed your face in his hands now and pulled you into a long, luxurious, kiss. You both stood there for a while just exploring each other’s mouths, being taken back to the moment you had kissed for the first time.

When you both had been so relieved to see the other alive, knowing how you felt about each other. When your lips had finally cascaded against one another after almost a decade of wanting, waiting, yearning.

And now here you were again, all of those feelings coming back at once. It was as if you started again, feeling like you had almost lost him in those five minutes Vecna had a hold on him.

“I’m sorry, baby,” he pressed his forehead against yours as tears dripped down his cheeks, his mind clear of any bad thoughts. 

“No, I'm sorry,” you shook your head with your own tears falling down. “If I hadn’t made you feel that way Vecna wouldn’t have anything to hold onto,”

“You do whatever you feel you need to do, Eddie,” you went on. 

“I just-- I can’t stand the thought of leaving you here again, not for any reason or any amount of time. I just want-- need, us to be together as much as we possibly can, because I lost so much time with you and I don’t wanna lose any amount of time with you, ever, ever again,” 

“I know, i know,” he pulled you closer as you cried into his chest.

“And I want to stay here with you, I do. I just--” You cried.

“No,” he pulled you back to face him. 

“No, don’t you think for one second of just-- dropping out, to stay here with me. That is the absolute one thing I have dreaded about us being together, me holding you back,” 

“You don’t--” you put a hand to his face.

“Maybe not now, but if you do that it will actually be true, yeah?” He gave you a sad smile. “So you-- you do what you have to do, and I’ll do the same. And we’ll--”

“I’ll come back for you, Eddie,” You cut him off, knowing he was having his doubts. “I swear to God, as soon as school ends I will be right back here,” 

“Hopefully not here,” he joked, gesturing around you. 

“You know what i mean,” you hit him lightly.

“Yeah, I do, Princess,” he smiled, kissing you again. “And who knows, maybe this summer I might just come to you, being a free man and all,” 

“I love you, Eddie,” 

“I love you too, Y/N,” He smiled, kissing you once again. “Now let’s get the hell out of here,”

-----

Eddie’s Trailer 

Dustin, Max, and Lucas all paced around Eddie’s living room, the gaping portal hole in the middle of all of them. 

“Where are they?” Dustin worried out loud. 

“I mean, they were walking on foot Dustin,” 

“But still,” he paced unnervingly. “I just want them--” 

Suddenly sounds of running and chattering interrupted his thought. All three of them looked down to see Nancy, Steve and Robin running to the opening in the ceiling. 

“Where is Y/N and Eddie?” Dustin immediately noticed his sister was missing. 

The three of them looked at each other awkwardly, trying to figure out what exactly to say to him, and who would say it. 

“Dust…” Steve stepped up, knowing him the best out of the three of them. 

“No,” Dustin shook his head, refusing to hear whatever he was about to say. “No, don’t say it,”

“She didn’t…” Steve tried again.

“Shut up,” Dustin spoke over him.

“She didn’t make it,” He finished.

“Yeah I think that was obvious, Steve,” Robin hit him lightly. 

“But what about Eddie?” Lucas asked.

“He uh,” Steve looked at the two girls. “He wanted to stay with her--” 

“Stay with her?!” Max gasped out of nowhere. “He wanted to stay with a dead body?!” 

“MAX!!!!” Lucas hit her violently, gesturing to Dustin who was silently imploding, trying to take everything everyone was saying in. 

“So you’re telling me I’ve lost my sister, and my best friend--?” Dustin stammered.

“I’m not your best friend?” Steve blurted out.

“REALLY, Steve?” Max scoffed.

“...It just came out,” He muttered, embarrassed.

“NOT the point!” Dustin yelled.

“You just let him stay there with-- with Y/N?” He couldn’t bear to refer to you as just a body. 

He was dying inside, trying like hell to keep it together. You were more of a best friend to anyone in the vicinity at that moment. You had been his first friend, his big sister. You taught him everything. His ABC’s, how to count, what made the perfect burger and pizza, which ice creams were good and which were downright toxic. 

He had waited for what seemed like forever for you to come home from Chicago, wanting to ask you about girls. He knew you’d be reluctant, but he wanted to tell you all about Suzy. You had been the first person he wanted to tell in the first place. But when he called your dorm the person who answered said you were out, and then never gave you the message. 

He had felt the two of you growing apart since you had left, and it would have killed him if he hadn’t been so busy with the literal apocalypse happening every other minute of the day. He wanted to keep you from it, from all of this. For this exact reason. He didn’t want you involved because he couldn’t lose you, and now his worst nightmare had happened. 

“We tried to--” Robin tried to explain to Dustin how they had pleaded with Eddie to come with them while he lay there sobbing, holding your ‘dead’ body.  His anguished cries were forever burned into her brain as they tried dragging him away from you. 

He was bigger than all of them, even an inch or two on Steve, so he had easily ripped away from their grasp and ran back to your side, cradling you in his arms. She had finally been the one to beg Nancy and Steve to just let him be. She couldn’t take hearing him cry anymore, it was too tortuous. 

“Dustin we really tried to--” Robin tried telling him.

“No,” he stopped them, moving away from the hole. “No I don’t wanna hear anymore, do you hear me?!”

“Okay can we just focus on getting the rest of us out of here, please?” Nancy had enough of all of the drama. She just wanted to be back in the real world.

“Jesus Nancy, way to be empathetic,” Robin scoffed under her breath.

“I’m sorry!” She threw her hands up. “I’m sorry I’m tired of being in this god-forsaken place. I’m sorry if I'm a tad anxious when I’m literally steps away from freedom!”

“Alright alright,” Steve put his hands on her shoulders, trying to calm her down. “Okay, we’re getting out okay?”

“Thank you,” she mumbled, rubbing his hands on her shoulder. 

“Do you have something to get us out guys?” Steve asked the kids. 

“Yeah,” Lucas grabbed the ‘rope’’ Dustin had made since Dustin was busy having a crisis over you and Eddie. 

He threw it up into the ceiling, and to their shock and amazement it stuck. In the Upside Down, he had thrown it ‘down’ to the group for them to climb.

“That is so trippy!” Robin gasped. “Okay who’s first?” 

“Ladies first,” 

“Nance,” Robin pointed at her. 

“Thank you,” She smiled gratefully as she pulled herself up the rope and into Eddie’s living room, crashing onto the mattress they had put in front of the hole. 

“Alright Robin, c’mere,” Steve nodded to her as she followed Nancy.

--------

Meanwhile

You and Eddie were reaching the entrance to the Trailer Park, when you saw the portal and the group starting to go through it.

“Shit,” Eddie muttered. He didn’t waste any time grabbing your hand and sprinting towards the portal. “Let’s go baby, let’s go!” 

You were practically howling in pain as Eddie pulled you through the park, your leg throbbing in pain. BUt you did your best to keep up with him, lest he drop you and leave you there. Though you knew he’d never actually do that. 

“HEY! GUYS! WAIT UP!” Eddie screamed across the park, hoping to get their attention.

-------

At The Portal

Steve was about to head up the rope when they all heard Eddie screaming. Even Dustin could hear it from across the trailer. He leaped up off the couch and ran to the portal. 

“Steve!” He yelled. “Steve who was that?!” 

“It’s Eddie,” Steve answered in disbelief, staring at the two of you racing towards them. “...And Y/N!”

“She’s alive?!” Dustin began to cry happy tears, he didn't care who saw them. You were alive. 

“She’s alive!” Steve smiled up at him. “And they’re coming! They’re gonna make it!” 

“Thank God,” Dustin breathed a sigh of relief, wiping his tears away.

----------

You and Eddie were still almost to the portal where Steve was yelling encouraging words to you both. 

“Come on guys, you can do it!” He called. 

You could hear your brother yelling for you, tears in his voice. “Y/N!! Y/N I’m here!!!!” 

You began to smile at Eddie, who was thinking the same thing: You were gonna make it out of here. Together. 

You were so elated in thinking about getting out of there you didn’t notice a rock in your path. You tripped on it just before reaching Steve, sending you sailing on top of it, banging your head against it. It knocked you out cold. 

Eddie had the inertia of still running when you toppled over the rock, releasing your hand from his grapes unintentionally as he stoped a few feet away from you. 

“Shit!” He began to panic, about to run to your side. But something stopped him. 

Before he could make a move, Vecna appeared in front of him, blocking your unconscious body from his view. 

“I don’t think so,” He wagged a finger.

Everyone gasped and gaped in horror as they watched Vecna physically pick up your body and throw it over his veiny shoulder. 

“You tell Eleven if any of you want to see your friend alive, she’ll come to me,” He smirked. 

“What the--” Eddie began to panic, looking at Steve and up at his friends, then back to Vecna.

“We don’t know how to find her!!!” Dustin screamed down to Vecna. 

“Well, you’d better pray you figure out a way,” He chuckled darkly. “Now if you’ll excuse me, Y/N and I need to get better acquainted,” 

He ran a gray finger down your thigh, smelling you with a perverted smirk.

“You SON OF A---” Eddie started to make a run at him, but Steve held him back as hard as he could. 

“Don’t you fucking TOCH HER!!!” He screamed, angry tears stinging his eyes. 

His cries fell on deaf ears, as Vecna began to float back up into the sky with a mighty evil laugh, disappearing into the red horizon. 

‘What just--” Dustin looked down at Steve and Eddie. “What just happened?”

How were they going to save you now? 

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson #eddie x you #eddie munson angst #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x you angst #protect eddie munson #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things 4 #stranger things #spring break 86 #Spotify

[someoneinjersey]

made it through the weekend and even was able to go get some things done before we went and picked Bizzy up from her babysitter. i got my oil changed and i wanted to throw a fit because it cost $68. Ten years ago I could go right down the road and get an oil change for less than $25. what the actual fuck. so goddamn aggravating. told my mom about it and how as usual i'm not even a week into the month and basically all my disability money is gone. all she said was "welcome to adulthood. sad." and i swear i wanted to reach through the phone and shake the shit outta her. last week or the week before, kate and i had a big not-fight and during our talk afterwards we discussed how since my mom is my single biggest trigger and/or the source of seemingly unrelated triggers, i need to go back and make more boundaries or reinforce the ones i tried to put in place a while ago. and i was like hm, okay, i'll have to think about how i can broach the subject of say, being in contact like once a week unless something comes up maybe. then the very next day mom hit me with "you know i think if you didn't come to see me in october i wouldn't have survived" and i just threw my fucking hands in the air and gave up. idk what to fucking do and i don't have a therapist anymore and i'm extra moody about it all right now because i started my period four days late.

in any case regarding money, i was able to not mooch off kate all weekend since we went away so early in the month, and so the only things i "treated" myself to (besides food which is 50/50 on whether or not it's a treat or making life easier or whatever) was a denim boiler suit from walmart, potting soil, four pots, and a grow lamp so i can repot and move the four plants that live on the kitchen windowsill. i've never kept plants alive this long so i don't intend on letting them die yet, so they're getting bigger pots and new soil and i'll likely move them into my bedroom. probably switch night stands and stick them on the one in the far corner with the grow lamp. i wish we had places to put them out in the house but A we get zero sun B the aloe plant and chrysanthemum aren't good for the cats and C i'm the only one that takes care of them anyway so they might as well just stay in my space. and it's also like, is it "treating" myself to something if it's keeping a living thing alive? idk. and the denim boilersuit looks so fucking cute i have no regrets spending $28 on it.

it's still incredibly weird drinking coffee every day but it has been helping my moods, surprisingly. i also make myself have a cup of tea (usually decaffeinated green tea) before bed. i'm still keeping up with my planner, though i'm letting myself slide when it comes to my little goal of reading every day. if i blow through too many stories too fast i burn out, so i'm taking my current book slowly and giving myself some grace to take days off. i've eaten like shit since thursday what with being away from home (and today being busy and too tired to cook) so i've noticed i feel not as good in that respect but i can get back on track maybe by tomorrow. maybe. still being exhausted and also being in my period doesn't really bode well for having the energy to make healthy meals or being able to deny my period mood cravings. i have a very unhealthy relationship with food. my feelings inside turn foul and evil if i can't have exactly what i want to eat when i want it if i have a craving. it might actually be psychotic.

i have some things i've been wanting to write, little fanfic ideas. or maybe not so little. but i can't activate that switch in my brain to actually do it. i have hang ups. a lot of them. bah

oh and i left my apple watch on the other side of the state like a fuckin champ. night yall

[shirohige-pirates]

Birds of a Feather

CisFem Reader x Marco

CW: Violence, blood, language, adult themes and scenes. 18+ only

Summary: Life has not been kind to you. After a string of bad relationships, you're a little jaded and a little depressed in all honestly. The worst day of your life seems to be the turning point, but the roller coaster ride that follows could either throw you soaring free, or have you caged forever?

Chapter 7: Motor Running

That weekend, and the week after, went by slower than any other week before, as far as you were concerned. You and Marco met for lunch a couple times, but usually he had an appointment, or you had a meeting. Even when you had time enough to share a quick meal, it was indeed a quick meal. You both talked about work more than anything – you had tried to wheedle some details about the date out of him, but he was teasingly tight-lipped on the matter.

None of your time together had been uncomfortable, but aside from kissing the top of your hand at the end of dinner, Marco kept his distance. It wasn’t like he was avoiding you, but you weren’t sure if he wanted to take things slow, or if he was giving you the lead. Kid, and most everyone else you’d dated, were pretty physical.

It wasn’t like you got yanked into a dark corner and slammed against the wall all the time, or that you even needed that level of painfully obvious desire. It was just different from what you had become used to.

But Marco wasn’t in the city just on business. He wasn’t visiting from the ocean’s depths, and he wasn’t loud, or angry, or crass. There was passion there, unmistakably, and it had lit up his eyes more than once since you’d known him.

Maybe he was worried that if he came on too strong, you’d break and run. Whatever the case was, you weren’t going to worry about it for now. You weren’t going anywhere any time soon as it was, especially with your car still in Kid’s care.

Buggy dropped you off at home, and by that, he had the Bubble he’d ordered detour to your place before taking him home. Bon-bon and Ivankov had been taking you home for the most part, and you’d only stayed over at the office one day this past week. You’d taken a couple Bubbles to get into work, and one early morning Sanji gave you a lift.

You were going to be happy to have your car back.

Your phone rang shortly after you got home, and you recognized the shop’s number.

“Hey Red, what’s up?”

There was a short grunt on the other end of the line. “Got the body restored, waiting on a few more parts to come in before she’ll be ready. I called to see if you wanted a different paint job, you little shit.”

You laugh. “Sorry, I couldn’t help it. Hm, a different color…”

“I’m bringing in that long-nose artist to do the actual bird, so don’t worry about sticking with stock colors if you don’t want to.”

“Oh, when’s he coming in?”

“Sunday, it’s a personal project for him, so I’m trying not to tie him up during usual work hours. He should be in around 9am.”

“Hmm… Usopp opens up a lot of options.”

“Heh, he does. Guy’s got a good eye for things, even if he’s a little skittish.”

“Around you Kid, everyone’s a little skittish.”

“You aren’t, calling me by that stupid fuckin’ nickname.” He grumbles.

You grin. “I just don’t have the sense to be afraid of anyone.” He grunts, and you continue. “You remember that blue Killer was using for his welding mask?”

“Yeah.”

“Can you base coat her with that? I want to come by Sunday and talk about options with Usopp, but I know you need to let the base coat set before he starts.”

“Going with a whole different color scheme, huh?”

“The rust and the red went well together,” you muse, chuckling. “But if all the rust is gone, then it’s time for something different, right?”

Kid grunts, but doesn’t say anything.

“Something on your mind?”

He clicks his tongue, grumbles under his breath and then finally lets out a big dramatic sigh. “I feel like I’m the one being replaced.” He finally admits angrily.

“You’ll always be my unreasonable asshole ex-boyfriend turned marginally reasonable asshole best friend.” You say, a playful edge in your voice.

“… I better not be your best friend.”

“I mean, it’s between you and Buggy, and you’re more stable.”

Kid scoffs and laughs. “You’re kind of shit at making friends.”

“Pot and Kettle, I suppose.” You grumble back before laughing along with him.

There’s a beat of silence after you both settle down and Kid sighs a little. “That Vet does anything to hurt you, you tell me.”

“Pfft, I can bring him with me Sunday, maybe, you want to tell him to his face or something?”

“Fuck no. I ain’t gonna let him raise his guard like that!” Kid snaps before huffing. “Shop’s a public place though, I’m not saying he’s barred or anything.”

“Alright, I don’t know what his Sundays are like, but if I need a ride I’ll give you a call.” You say with a smile. “You’ll enjoy getting a look at his car up close, I bet.”

“I don’t need to see the inside of a ’72 SEL.” He grumbles.

“Not even one that’s washed three times a year? That engine was immaculate.” You tease.

“… You’ve been under the hood?”

“Mm, speaking of, if you have some custom hydraulic lifts, the hood lift’s busted. He hasn’t had any luck finding a replacement.” You mention it nonchalantly, but you can hear Kid’s mood shift before he even speaks.

“I’ll see what I have lying around.” He clears his throat. “I could probably make something in the next two days that would work.”

“Metal geek.” You tease.

“Book whore.” He shoots back.

“Greaser guzzler.” You’re barely able to keep yourself from laughing especially when Kid starts to cackle.

“Leaving me low hanging fruit. Ah, but I know, you’re going to end up that Vet’s pet, little mouse.”

“I’m not a mouse,” you insist.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re more like to hunt mice than be one.” You can picture him waving his hand dismissively.

You laugh. “Talk to you later, Kid.”

“Mm, later.”

You end the call and take a moment before you opt to send a text.

You: Sneakers or heels for tomorrow? Also are you available Sunday morning?

You peeled off your work clothes while you waited for a response. A shower before putting together something for dinner seemed like a good idea. You were going to work a couple hours tomorrow, but you’d decided to bring a laptop home vs going into the office. Going over some of the packets while you had breakfast and coffee was a good way to start your morning, and you wouldn’t have to worry about getting caught up at work and losing track of time.

Marco: I’ll show you my emo phase, if you show me yours. 😉

You laugh when you read the response.

You: It was more a punk phase, but sure.

Marco: I’m free Sunday, what’s up?

You: Kid’s getting the base coat down on my old firebird, and I need to go in Sunday to work with the detail artist for the final design and colors. I could use a ride, but Kid and the crew would love to see your SEL. (Also he might have an arm for your hood).

Marco: That’s doable. We can talk about it more tomorrow.

#Birds of a Feather #Marco x reader #x reader #reader insert #marco the phoenix #marco the pinepple #modern au

[sillyname30]

Joey made a sweet birthday post for Lauren.

jonyricker

🏃🏻‍♂️💨 The reason I’m posting this so late is because i was trying to not spend too much time on my phone during this weekend’s birthday fun, OK?! 🙅‍♀️ 📵 But in honor of #InternationalWomansDay and my favorite person in the entire world, I wanted to make sure I did this one right 💁‍♀️❤️‍🔥 We’ve once again reached that time of year when I have the privilege of wishing @slowpez8 the HAPPIEST OF BIRTHDAYS 🥳👯‍♀️🥳👯‍♀️ I could literally put pen-to-paper all day long with things I adore about Lo 💌: Her seismic love of Diane 🐶 Her gut busting bits 🎪 Her RANGE (in both emotional maturity and on stage) 📏 But what I want to give Lauren her flowers for today is the incredible growth she’s made to further know, learn from, and love herself over the last few years 💐🥰 I’m kinda blown away by the strides Lo has taken to fully settle into her power and see herself as the Queen she is 👸🏽And I don’t mean this in a ego maniacal way, obviously. But in a way where she can embrace all the things that make her SO fuckin amazing and create the life she’s worked for, ready for, and immensely deserves. 🏋️‍♀️🍸She’s probably reading and going “Joooeeyyyy staaaaahp!”🤦‍♀️ But literally don’t care! I will use whatever fuel I got in the tank to empower Lo and be her #1 Hype Man™️📯 for the rest of time. I love her so much!! Happy Birthday Jee!! I’m so fuckin proud of you 🤩😍🤩

#joey richter #lauren lopez #instagram

[greenmeansgone]

Guess who's back on his bullshit babes! I dissappeared because a lot fucking happened honestly.

So, that pub job... Didn't work out. Got let go bc the place damn near went under. Got swept up in a door to door sales MLM. Left that. Got in at what I thought was gonna be a GREAT kitchen opportunity, paying 15/hr at this cool new diner to make food from scratch. Fired for being transgender, the place ended up firing ALL their queer employees not too long after. Ended up at a fuckin pokeworks making 8/hr for the first time in like 4 fucking years, lowest point ever and literally almost killed myself over it.

Now, I'm at a stable factory bakery job making macarons all day. Four days a week for ten hours, hour long lunch breaks plus bennies, and I can be OUT AT WORK and not get tormented. Not a single cishet person on the weekend shift, half of us are neurodivergent and the other half are furries, some are both. Making 12/hr to do something I love, AND I don't have to interact with the public anymore. It's beautiful. I'm so fucking happy.

That being said I am still absolutely back on my bullshit, as I tend to be during a manic episode. But wanted to update you guys and let you know I didn't off myself. Hope my beloved mutuals got help and got out, and if not they're at least doing a bit better. KISS y'all! 💚

#💚

[weirdponytail]

Yeah the hardware store I applied to and then showed up to for my interview apparently already filled all positions and never got around to calling me.

Pathetic venting under the cut.

I had to switch to 'temp' for the job that I was actually sorta enjoying because the hours were apparently not set (they could hold you past the stated end time and I need a definitive time because other responsibilities) and there was no way I could do appointments and whatnot during the week. Tried to talk to the manager about shifting hours around so I would be making up for a few hours off for one day during the week so I could get my responsibilities handled and appointments taken care of and he seemed on board. And then came down later and told me point blank, "Just to reiterate, I'm willing to work with you on the schedule as long as you don't suck."

So yeah that put me off pretty fuckin' hard. I don't care if you put restrictions on if you're going to implement a changed schedule different from other people. But you need to actually state the restrictions and caveats. The fuck does 'as long as you don't suck' mean? I didn't get any complaints on my work during the week I worked there full time, no one told me I was doing anything wrong, and as far as I could tell I was doing my work fast and doing it well. If the manager can't be mature and set actual guidelines and give a straight answer, what the hell does he think I'm going to do when I've already told him I've got responsibilities to family that have actual medical issues?

The annoying thing is that I was actually starting to enjoy it. Most of the other employees were friendly and fun to be around. I was getting used to being on my feet for ten fuckin hours split by a lunch break and getting up at 5 am. Pay was good too!! Speaking of pay, the manager said he'd call me over the weekend to tell me what days they needed help this week and he didn't, so I don't have his number and nothing was set up to get me paid for the hours I worked.

Sorry, everyone else in my life doesn't want to hear me vent. I'll toss this in a little while I just needed to word vomit it all out.

#ket rant

[dredshirtroberts]

Alright, debrief time

(pretend i was able to find a fittingly funny gif of someone removing their trousers quickly and/or explosively)

honestly there should be *way* more easily findable gifs of this, but my search-fu technique is not doing me any favors this mor...today.

(it's not morning anymore, bummer. it felt like it'd been morning for hours, figured it might stick around longer. alas)

so. This weekend was busy - i mean yesterday was the necessary "everyone recover your spoons and refill your social batteries because we drained them completely" day, but idk if it was enough tbh lol.

Friday was exactly as expected with no concerns during the outing or subsequent hangout. Like i was tired and very much had absolutely Done An Outing but I was doing pretty good all things considered, both immediately after hangouts were done and also the next morning. I was tired, but like. The expected amount of tired and I felt very optimistic about the day. I didn't even really feel like i needed medicine and considering I've felt like I needed to take medicine in the morning every single day this past week, pretty impressive tbh imb.

And Saturday was already going to be the tricky day - i went into this weekend knowing what i was up against, and with the understanding that I was going to probably accidentally do some damage to myself but it's *on purpose*. It has a *point* and I think that makes it different to the rest of the times i've done this to myself.

So even though I absolutely should have and knew that going in, I did not take any medicine because that was the point.

For as long as any of us can remember, going all the way back into rather early childhood, my legs just always get exhausted really fast. I'd get in trouble for sitting down in P.E., my parents fussed at me about it when I was little, and I was told that I didn't actually feel that tired, and that I just needed to push harder because clearly if I was that tired so quickly then my muscles needed to do more work to become stronger. If I just worked them out, they would be stronger and wouldn't get tired so easily. It was on this metric that i ran in 4 half-marathon races with fairly decent time. Just keep pushing, you're tired because you're not in shape enough, just keep going. It doesn't matter that you run at least 3x a week, for longer and longer distances, it doesn't matter that you're going uphill for at least half of that time, it doesn't matter if you're eating a limited diet because the household is once more trying a lo-carb, or similar, crash diet we'll forget about as soon as we take a "vacation" or even just by the weekend, but god forbid I eat anything more than the Allotted Portion Allowed By The Parents before they start saying shit about how I need to eat less or save some for later, or save some for the rest of the family. If I just lost weight, if I was just *stronger* then I wouldn't complain so much and my legs would feel less tired.

In a move that will only ever continue to shock my parents, it did not work. About 15-30 minutes into any outing on a good day, my legs will start to ache like I've been, well, training for a marathon. Which I can accurately describe because i've fuckin done that.

But I've stopped taking note of it because i was told *so young* to just ignore it. It wasn't real, or it was real but everyone else just dealt with it better, or whatever. And by the way, i also was never allowed to sit and rest when it happened while I was a child - the stroller was something I didn't really have access to as good once my sister was born, and that was at around 3 years old. I may have gotten like A Year with access to it still, while she was still papoose-able, but once we needed it for her I was expected to suddenly be able to carry my own weight wherever we went.

My parents really like theme parks, family trail hikes, and going to festivals where you wander around and there's very little seating. I got used to ignoring it and pushing past really fast, but it meant that I just...really did not like going out very much. Our family trips were always kind of through a filter of "I'm not really enjoying myself as much as I thought I would and I have no idea why I'm so grumpy all of the time". it got passed off as teenage angst and my bad attitude, because i couldn't complain because i didn't know what was wrong.

plus it wasn't like complaining would have done me any good. I would get yelled at for voicing a concern or need, and then when I would have a Health Complication that made my parents look bad, I'd get yelled at for not saying something sooner. So I just stopped sharing and would handle my health issues quietly and to myself. I think my parents just assumed I grew out of or stopped experiencing several relatively frequent health issues I kept having because I stopped telling them about it and did my very best to hide what was happening when I was in pain or sick, until I absolutely couldn't. I knew my bad health would be a burden on them, so if I said something and they looked at me with "concern" (read: what appeared to be actual irritation in their alarm), I'd backtrack which I think led to both my being seen as a hypochondriac and a liar.

So this weekend was to see exactly how long it takes me to reach the point of "My legs are tired" and then when I hit the wall of "I can't do this anymore without a break". My partner took me thrift store shopping which was super fun and rewarding, but it really did put into perspective how much I've been hurting myself.

Within the time it took us to walk from the car across the parking lot (not even to the door necessarily yet), I felt the familiar burning ache of overworked muscles and I was like "Alright. Well. Here we go."

I don't know how long we were in the first part of the store, before we walked down to the other, bigger part. I had 2 flannel shirts and was looking at the pants and already my arm was aching. Once I picked 5 total things, we'd moved on from the clothes so I could see what else they had. Traveling through the rest of the store, my arm slowly got more and more tired.

I got separated from my partner in the store (was fine, even with my issue at feeling Lost in Stores) and realized I was starting to crash really fast - I was going to need the medicine I'd brought ASAP, but my drink was in the car, and I had to pay for my things and I didn't know where my partner was.

I found them, we grabbed like 2 more things, they helped carry the heaviest stuff, and we paid and left. Once in the car, knowing it was safe to feel the pain, knowing it was safe to not have to keep pushing and make myself keep going, I realized I couldn't do it.

The day-long shopping marathons the women in my family do, the parties, the festivals, the hikes and the amusement parks, I physically cannot do them. And I don't know how long it's been like this because I wasn't allowed to pay attention to that.

Don't get me wrong, I love all of those things, but I cannot do them under my own power and I haven't been able to in ages.

I always figured if everyone had the option of sitting down and wheeling along rather than having to use their own two legs, they'd take it. In fact, I assumed most folks would just casually dream of not having to stand up ever again, of not having to walk across vast distances from the house to the mailbox, of just not having to...not having to hurt? I figured most folks' legs hurt all the time just like mine and I figured everyone else was just better at dealing with it.

Even bringing out my cane and the medicine didn't really *help* all that much. We rested for a while, but I still really wanted to go to our friends' cookout later that evening, despite my partner now being too worn out for it. I was super prepped to go it alone (had already gotten confirmation and assurance that it was allowed and possible for me to rest while i was there), but I was glad that Meta Prime was also good to go hang out because it is easier with a buddy.

I think adrenaline has been doing a lot of heavy lifting for my body (no pun intended?) because the adrenaline of going to be around friends (plus also the medicine, and the use of my cane and probably also the ability to sit) helped reduce the amount of pain and stiffness I normally would have been in at that point, even by the time we got home. (that or someone was working overtime to push to the front and make it so we couldn't feel it yet - it's a thing i try not to think about it too hard it makes things confusing and complicated).

but even with yesterday spent in bed and high af most of the day, i'm still sore, still tired, still achy. And I just used to live like this. Like no fucking wonder I was useless after work all the time.

I think this has confirmed for me, however, that it might be something to absolutely look into to get a wheelchair. This of course does require that I get my ass in to see a doctor sooner rather than later (yes i know i haven't done it yet i am...struggling with the concept), and figure out how to get them to write me an Rx for one but like. Baby steps. I at least...can confirm that apparently most folks don't spend about half their waking time wishing they were more physically disabled so that it would be seen as reasonable to let them sit and be in a wheelchair and in fact that might be a symptom of being more physically disabled and perhaps sometimes needing a wheelchair.

but yeah i'm just...processing.

i've already taken medicine. It hasn't really done much, considering we're in the Peak Time it should be working, which probably illustrates exactly how bad I feel. I'm going to go back to resting and hope i feel better soon lol

[ch1bii]

took me until 4am to finish BUT I FUCKIN DID IT Y’ALL

okay but this gameplay was honestly wild like it was just all over the place 😭 so first i set up a schedule of frequently going shopping and answering his emails on the weekends and having a mix of hanging out with natsumi or doing handicraft club activities during the week. but then later on i realized being at :D with natsumi was going to affect my requirements for chiharu and worried that i’d eventually fulfill hers instead of his so then i just started ignoring her completely 💀 and i would also hang out with arisawa only to study for testing periods but even that made her go up to :D so i started ignoring her as well 😭 yea i was a pretty bitchy friend this gameplay only for the sole purpose to win at it; plus i’ve ended up with both of their endings more than once so it’s just 50/50 now 😒 anywho at one point i struggled with getting chiharu’s cg of him using his laptop at the park in autumn even when i followed the requirements of getting it 👹 but ig i must’ve missed something or just witnessed a slight misinfo. i’ve already gotten the cg in another gameplay anyways so it really wasn’t such a big deal 😦 also one time when i hanged out with arisawa on a sunday chiharu was in the background??? but it says he only does that when you fully fulfill his requirements to get his ending and at that time i was barely halfway through his emails 😭 but sadly when i tried saving it i instead load back to a previous slot 💀 so i’m not sure if it was a glitch or that maybe instead it has to do with him being at :) with you??? and if that’s also the case with the cg incident??? idk we can’t really check that so i’m still not sure 😭 anywho after all that i was already near 3rd year and had finished all of chiharu’s emails. so i was just left with trying to lower other ppls stats and dealing with hazuki being a little bitch for “ignoring” him when all he does is avoid me 👹 and so i was kinda feeling miserable cause i wasn’t sure if i was even going to be able to manage getting chiharu’s next cg on time and having to end up with wasting my time over nothing, leading to another long hiatus of avoiding and hating this game 💀

that was until i stepped upon a lil something…

more like someone 🤭

YUP THATS RIGHT. FUCKIN MORIMURA SAKUYA AKA MORI-RIN CAME AND SAVED THE GAME. And when I tell y’all that i didn’t even do this on purpose I MEAN IT. LIKE HE LITERALLY JUST APPEARED WITHOUT ANY KNOWING OF MY ACTIONS. to be fair i DID use the studying by urself command BUT IT WAS DURING THE END OF 2ND YEAR in which i assumed he’d only appear this way in 1ST year 😭😭😭 so yea i was just fuckin 🤭🤭🤭 the whole time, like any tear i felt like shedding before just completely evaporated i am dead serious. WITH HIM TSUKUSHI FINALLY GOT OFF MY ASS ABOUT ENDING UP AN OLD MAID AND ACTUALLY HAD SOMEONE I COULD SPEND NEW YEARS WITH 💀 no cause i swear bro is too underrated when he is literally the sweetest (and the best) guy in this game I SAID WHAT I SAID 🙄 anywho yea life was good i even started having more hope in getting what i want i was even near finishing 3rd year 🤭 so now i’m near new years where tons of stuff happens in like one week 😦 so first i get club master in handcraft club!!! and i even get this thing where mori-rin comes after the like award thing and congratulates me, even sharing how his mother did handicrafting and gets emotional 🙁 (such a nice add in) then later on in the week i get offered to work at my flower shop job full time??? and there was somthin else but i forgot 💀 anywho there i was nervous for january cause that’s supposedly when the important chiharu cg is. and just when i knew, THERE IT WAS 🤭 and i’m ngl that it’s honestly such a cute cg and probs one of my favs like agh what chiharu says is so meaningful… maybe i just have a weakness 💀 anywho right there and then i felt COMPLETE 🙏🙏🙏 i even FINALLY got chiharu’s emote in the saving section 👏👏👏 even tho it’s kinda disappointing (or i should say rather CREEPY 😨) by how it’s just him spying at ur character thru bushes 😦 istg they could’ve done anything but THAT like maybe ur character and him using their laptops side by side then they look at each other OR OR ur character using it’s laptop then chiharu somehow pops up in the back 😭 idk but ANYTHING could’ve worked better 💀 moving on WE’RE FINALLY OFF TO GRADUATION DAY!!! after taking the entrance exam in which i applied for a first rate university and here i am STILL hoping i don’t get absolutely played and that all goes well 😰 we get to the church, chiharu appears, says his lovely dovey stuff, share a kiss, then the rest is history 🤭 ngl like the cg the confession was pretty cute and genuine, although compared to others why was the mc completely DRY in replying like bro expresses his feelings and we’re just like “okay” or “…” 💀💀💀 but ig it’s understandable when in reality we kinda don’t know much about the guy and was ghosted by him for idk how long then he just comes and confesses💀 it’s why i kinda just like to imagine side emails we’re definitely a thing between em so that it wouldn’t be so bland in what we know abt each other but yea 🤷🏻‍♀️ to finish off this idk how long blog it was unexpectedly a satisfying gameplay and i had some fun with it even if i rushed thru most of it bc of how i just wanted to go to bed 💀 but it was worth it at the end 🤭

#tmgs #tmsg1 #aoki chiharu #chiharu aoki #morimura sakuya #sakuya morimura #tokimeki memorial girl's side 1st love