#i want to have fun again but online fandom isn't fun anymore.

[thediktatortot]

Fandom is so different now and it’s becoming un-fun with how quickly shit moves.

I just want to enjoy things. I don’t want to have to play a game of Artist-Race that seems to be afoot lately.

Ya’ll eat up fandoms, leave artists and writers bone dry and then move on so fucking quickly then fucking wonder where all the Good Fandom Stuff is.

Idk Maybe cherish some things for longer. Reblog stuff. Interact with people. Comment and share.

Fandom is Capitalism now and I’m not being nuanced.

#rant #vent #I'm just tired #i want to have fun again but online fandom isn't fun anymore. #no one interacts with each other #you just like shit and leave

[rinhaler]

idk if anyone else is feeling this or if I'm just being overly senstive but I feel like being online, especially on tumblr, is such a hostile minefield lately??

like there isn't a day that goes by I don't see a post that's like 'if you're into this you're disgusting' or 'if you ship this couple block me' and I feel like it's just constant. I think to myself like okay so what are we actually allowed to do online anymore 😭😭 I'm always gonna write and draw what I want and what makes me happy but it's always at the back of my mind like damn everyone is so mean lately can we not just be nice and supportive and if you don't like something you don't have to interact or engage... you don't need to post 'this character would never do this' or 'this character doesn't suit this trope' it just comes across so rude and makes being online in a community so uncomfortable.

This isn't at anyone in particular btw I'm just seeing it a lot. This isn't a new take by all means I know fandom is different and everyone wishes it was how it used to be when people were supportive and engaging I just am so tired of seeing it everyday. I missing having the freedom to just post stories and art without thinking. It's impossible to make everyone happy but it's so jarring to think of how many stories are going untold and works of art aren't being made out of fear of being told you're wrong or gross and blah blah blah.

I just want us all to have fun online again 🥹

And to those moots and followers who do motivate me and support me and other creators ilysm thank u for being a flicker of hope and kindness in the community

#🧚🏽‍♀️ — luxe chit chat #is this a lil bit lame and/or cringe? #perhaps but we ball #some of the stuff ive been seeing man...... ANNOYING #anyway good morning i am upright and online #hope ur all having lovely days thus far #mwah mwah

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I told my online friend that they embarrass me?

Note that I love my friend. It's more complicated than the title suggests And no it isn't bait!

So, I (20X) have a few profiles on social media. My online friend (22X) follows me everywhere with the same account. We've been friends for a very long time

Their account is cringe. Easiest way to describe it. They've had it ever since they were a kid, it has that horrible uwu humor from the mid 2010s all over it, old fanart, old fics, "cursed" fandoms, you name it. They've linked every other account they've ever had so there's even more stuff. It's exactly what you'd expect from someone who's really into fandom and has been using the same account for the past decade

Let me be clear! Being cringe isn't bad, if anything long live cringe and having fun. I'm no stranger to it, we literally share the same interests and I contributed to half the things on their account. Even if I keep my online and private life separate I don't think it's bad to do otherwise

I'm glad they're more immune to cringe culture than I am and I don't want them to be like me. This embarrassment is my issue, I care too much about people's opinions, I know that. That's why I'm trying to fix it! And ironically it's where the problems start

I want to get over my fear of showing my drawings to people I know IRL. I decided to make a private account for my IRL friends to follow and select what to post so I can get used to it bit by bit. Exposure therapy basically

I know it sounds stupid but I have diagnosed social anxiety and for me it's a really big deal. I can barely cope with this much. Please don't mistake it as a chronically online issue, it's happening online simply because it's easier for me but it affects my life in many ways as a disorder does. I'm just trying to step out of my comfort zone in my own terms through something I'm passionate about

I invited my online friend because I love them and I appreciate their support. But again they use that same account for everything and they'll use it to interact with me. I know my IRL friends will see it, and they'll probably see our shitty old fanfics and cursed collab fandom posts where I'm clearly involved. That's not stepping out of my comfort zone in my own terms anymore

This is stopping me from posting anything or let my IRL friends know about the account. I want to try and figure something out with my friend, but if I confront them it'll come across as "you're embarrassing me" no matter how I word it. I don't want to come up with a lie or block them from my profile without explanation because that feels even worse

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[deepestuniversallove]

Hey I literally logged in just to give you support. Don't listen to these idiots telling you that you're gross for loving Mewtwo.

Because if loving Mewtwo is gross then the entire monster-fucking community should also be shamed but they aren't hmmmmmm I wonder why.

The degenerates in this fandom are perfectly fine with Ash fucking Latias, and men fucking Gardevoir, Vaporeon, or whatever slutty monster girl bitch of the week, but nooo you self shipping with Mewtwo is apparently cONcERnING or whatever.

(I love how no one calls the Hatsune Miku guy names lol, do I smell double standards? )

But this doesn't surprise me because the Pokemon community is full of hypocrites and these are the same no - life losers who shit their pants because Ash isn't in the anime anymore, their parents truly failed in raising them.

Lord knows I faced enough trouble for loving Steven and that too, from an Eevee fucker.

Monika, sweetie you are doing nothing wrong, your love for Mewtwo is so innocent, sweet and pure. I think it's beautiful how helped you with depression and escape your narcissistic mother.

People on this site love to preach mental health support but the very minute you do something different yet harmless suddenly it's

"OH NO YOU DARE TO LOVE A "FICTIONAL CHARACTER"

Keep on giving them rectal bleeding and draw more of you and Mewtwo ;) I love to see it.

AHH thank you so much for this message!! 🥹 That is so sweet of you!

Yeah, I dunno why it has always been like this. Even 10 or even 20 years ago, I often got messages chastising me for selfshipping with Mewtwo, calling it "nasty" and "degenerate", when really, i am not doing it to specifically be a degenerate, but because I honestly love Mewtwo. In his story, he too had to fight against a narcissistic "parent" (Giovanni), just like I had to against my own. How can it be seen as a crime to want to believe? Or has it been wrong to say "Mewtwo, please teach me to be brave like you" in my mind during the hard times, especially back when I was a lonely child?

Haha, I doubt anyone could ever shame the monster fucker community out of what they are doing. Or the furry community for that matter. 🤣

There always seems to be some sort of underlying misogyny happening. Women are expected to get an IRL husband/boyfriend to serve as soon as possible, so seeing a woman openly rather selfship with a fictional character is threatening to them, because how dare a woman not be in the kitchen and make sandwiches for a man? How dare a woman prefer to be single when there is a "male crisis of loneliness" happening?

Then again, I don't think I owe society anything. Where was society when I was abused? Where was the help or the community when I needed them most? I was left to my own devices. When a fictional character like Mewtwo brings someone like me more hope than any IRL human, that's how I know we failed as a society. Even sicker is that other more destructive forms of coping mechanisms are more encouraged. Somehow selfshipping is seen as more evil by the "moral police" than dying from a drug overdose on the streets or having alcoholism.

Anyone who ever complains to me about "ruining Mewtwo" or whatever - no, you aren't "concerned", you are just using that word to camouflage that what you really want is control over me and what I put out there. And i can tell you it is futile. I haven't survived so far just for some snotty brats to tell me what i can or cannot do in MY online space. Don't like what I post? Tough titties, use the block button. No one is forcing you to look at my "cringe". My cringy stuff brings me joy and makes me happy, and I feel I deserve some happiness in this shitty world of ours. You do too, so just..go and have some fun yourself. Don't waste your only life on policing others.

So yeah, you are right, dagdasgoddess. I will keep giving people "rectal bleeding". 🤣 No one can stop me from loving Mewtwo, my guardian angel that even visits me in my dreams at night, and loves me even when I absolutely despise myself. He will always be a bastion of love for me, a symbol that life is worth living regardless of hardships.

#mewtwo #selfshipping #answered asks

[golbrocklovely]

i saw someone on twitter seriously have a go bc snc were focusing more on their social life than their professional life. like what? thats insane. they’ve worked 24/7 for the last 10 years. they deserve to enjoy themselves for a while.

and i have to laugh. people saying theyre going to stop watching snc and laugh as their careers fumble? babes, if they depended solely on yt views for income they’d be uploading far more frequently. besides, they have 12 million followers and easily bag a million views on a video in the first 24 hours. a few dozen fans boycotting them is not going to make even an ounce of difference. but hey, if it makes you feel better, all power to you. (“you” being those fans ofc). not to mention they have investments and other business endeavours outside of youtube. your online hissy fit will do jack shit. (again, “you/your” being those fans)

:)

i think that's the thing i find so funny about this fandom. first off almost 99% of the drama is started by twitter. or at the very least they're the loudest at all times. they also think a lot of us feel the same way as them just bc it's an echo chamber over there. so when they all start calling snc out on something or think that that everyone feels the same way, they feel like they are making an impact by saying they'll leave or stop supporting if snc don't meet their demands.

and babes, if you really aren't enjoying your time here, you can go. it's fine. no one is holding a gun to your head and telling you to stay. but don't expect snc to do everything you want them to do. it's just not gonna happen.

sometimes i don't get this fandom. bc look, when i was here back in 2020/21, i got some of the backlash that the boys were facing. i understood parts of it, for sure. but there was a lot, and i do mean a lot, of extra shit that went on that made it much worse. and that side of the fandom… they cried wolf too many times. you don't get to do that repeatedly and then think that snc are gonna stick around to actually hear what you gotta say.

and especially rn, what exactly are ppl pissed off about?? bc look, you wanna say you miss when they were posting a lot more, sure. i get that. i miss them posting more often too. but you gotta also realize maybe WHY they aren't posting so much. and blaming their new gfs isn't one of those reasons.

they have explained that they basically had little to no personal life at one point, that all they were doing is working. that they didn't get to spend time with their friends or gfs bc they were working so much. sam, the man that never addresses drama, is asking fans to cool it. he full on said that he was miserable a year or so ago bc of all the stress he was under. and then colby, the man that doesn't cry ever, had a full on break down in 2022. and didn't even admit it until midway thru 2023. he doesn't read comments anymore bc they get so bad sometimes. or how about that colby even stated that he didn't even want to tell this fandom that he had cancer bc he knew how everyone would react if he went bald………. what does that tell you???? that we aren't trustworthy. that snc feel the need to pull back bc we are all toxic.

at what point do we turn the mirror on ourselves and realize hey, maybe i've taken things too far??

and reality is, a LOT of this only popped up once they both got gfs. a lot of fans say those two aren't to blame or they're not upset or they don't actually want to date snc, but at the end of the day them finding someone to love was the straw that broke the camels back. and you gotta sit back and wonder why does seeing snc happy make me upset and want to leave?? (if someone reading this is one of those fans)

bc rn, i'm more into snc than i have been in a while. i want to see them happy and healthy and enjoying life. sure, colby being in his feels (or sam even) was a fun time, sure. i love me some balcony tweets. but at the end of the day, i don't want him jaded and unable to find love again. why the fuck would i wish that on someone i love dearly??? same with sam. sure. i can joke about kat and how i want her new song to tear him a new one, but i still want him to be happy. i want him to be able to move on from his relationship with her. and that's not a cut at her. no one should be stuck feeling like shit. take it from the person that has been like that for years and still really is in one way or another: i wouldn't wish heartache on my worst enemy. so why would i do that to someone i say i care about??

but back to your ask lol

yeah, the twitter fandom thinks it's all high and mighty but it lost that spark by 2022. their words mean nothing, snc have pulled back bc that side of the fandom sucks (but also bc they want a break), and now they are facing the consequences of their actions and don't like it. womp womp. there's still almost 12 million of us babes. a couple 100 of you leaving ain't gonna do shit.

#ask #personal #sam and colby #sam golbach #colby brock

[innerslumber]

So...I've started drawing again. It's rough as all hell but the last few months while sick with pneumonia, I was stuck on my couch a lot and trying to sleep upright. Most nights it was unsuccessful and my brain was too scrambled to read or write, so I'd doodle.

During my teenage and college years, I wrote and drew a fair bit. Went to a ton of anime conventions and haunted the artists alley. But then school, work, family, LIFE just kept coming at me and then 20+ years went by with no creative outlet.

It didn't help that I've had people in my life that constantly discouraged it. That writing and drawing was frivolous and a waste of time. And as the years went by, the harder it was to think I could do it again. It was just easier to tell myself I got more important things to do.

But by some weird happenstance, I fell back into fandom a few years ago and picked up writing again. Now, I am the first person to say that my writing isn't like...earth shatteringly good or anything of that caliber. But that wasn't the point. I just wanted to create again and have fun with my new friends. I write at a glacial pace but at the end of the day, it feels nice to do it again when the inspiration strikes.

Art feels...different. It's incredibly intimidating lol. I know SO MANY INCREDIBLE artists and I've watched them apply themselves for years and I just...I don't know lol. The imposter syndrome is wicked hard. I could never call myself an artist, especially after such a long hiatus.

But a friend recently reminded me that art can literally be a doodle on a post-it note. I don't have to compare myself to others and undermine myself, too scared to even start. And the other day, another friend said I never have to post anything if I don't want to. As long as I'm happy and having fun, that's the whole point.

Creating anything, by word or art, can be so hard. So time consuming. But I'm going to keep trying at both. Right now I'm still figuring things out, especially because I'm trying to make art digitally and I've only done that a few times.

Life is still incredibly busy and hard...and I've been conditioned for years that to enjoy myself was being selfish. Having my abusive husband scream at me that I was a "bad mom and a bad wife" for having a writing hobby and that my online friends and I were "trash" for writing about "men fucking each other" was really demoralizing. I'd wait until when everyone was asleep to write on my phone in the dark. But at the end, I still ended up deleting and leaving behind so much because of his vitriol.

But that isn't my reality anymore. If I have time, I can write when I want to. I can draw when I want to. I don't have to look over my shoulder that I'll get caught doing something that isn't anything to be punished over.

And my art is all over the place but that's okay! I'm experimenting and trying new things. There isn't any high stakes. And I can allow myself to just enjoy it. Maybe I might even post it lol!

#lololol it's kinda hilarious because i see the image in my mind but the fingers are not translating it well #also digital is...it's amazing but also fuck the learning curve lol #I'm old ok??? i used to just draw on paper lol #also I've never drawn smut...so i should totally do that at some point bwahaha #personal #mom life #creative outlet #writing #drawing

[iidigestive-readerii]

Okay, I have to say something.

When I joined Tumblr in 2017, it had its faults. But - so many people interacted or commented or reblogged. On everything. It was such a fun little community of Star Wars fans and everyone else I was mutual with.

And now... it's crickets. I get that people have lives beyond fandoms, move on from interests, cycle through interests - but that's not what I'm saying.

No one reblogs anymore. With comments. Rarely. I get mostly hearts, but I have no idea what people actually think of most chapters and stories.

I know I've been in and out of the fandom since the pandemic started, due to my own personal reasons. Is that what this is? People don't want to interact with someone that's rarely there, and now that I finally beginning to enjoy fandom and writing again... There's no one.

And saying "find a different audience" or "follow new people" doesn't fully work. I might not like everything they post about and want to filter 10+ more tags to enjoy what I do care about.

I go through the tags, I know what pops up and what doesn't when you scroll. I've gone on friends Tumblr's and done the same thing.

Is this because Instagram and Twitter has created a reality that you shouldn't comment or reblog, less you're a stalker?

For a platform like this, reblogging and commenting on stuff shouldn't be a big deal. And if the OP doesn't want to engage...they don't have too. And they can delete your comment too, block you - and it has nothing to do with you as a person, because while your online persona reflects you, it isn't the person your coworkers, friends, and family know you as. And that's okay.

In the end it's just the internet and I'm just rambling about my thoughts here on this hellsite.

#tumblr culture #thoughts #personal #ii digestive reader ii

[dez-wade]

“4x1 on bad and him got hunted in the past 2 hours”

I understand that you don’t like the concept of the green team being split and you don’t like the red team and that’s completely fine! But you guys seem to be complaining about things that don’t need to be complained about? Bad literally gushed about how his 4v1 with red team was the most fun thing he’s done since purgatory started and red kept going on about how insane it was that he survived the fight as long as he did and Etoiles was complementing him in chat. They’re all having a lot of fun. You’re completely entitled to not liking the event or aspects of the event but acting like the event is ruined and it’s terrible when all of the ccs have had a really fun day today by their own admission just seems pointless. And again I’m not saying that you’re not allowed to dislike the red team but so many of these asks and answers are creating this “blue team are having/are going to have such a terrible time now :(“ as if bad wasn’t talking about how hyped he was about all of the people being reunited now on blue team and Tubbo being really excited and saying having new people has given him a new burst of excitement for the event and Fit isn’t going to have to be alone for 3 hours as the first on to log on in his team now that he’s on a team with Pac and tubbo and they’re all excited to be able to play together early again. Idk just seems weird to paint this whole team switch as this massive doom and gloom thing that’s going to ruin the event for ccs and viewers when, by most accounts for viewers and basically all of the ccs are having a blast, vent about you dissatisfaction all you like but you don’t have to pretend it’s because you feel bad for ccs who are doing just fine

4v1 isn't the problem, it's them being hunted down for hours without being able to even go to their base and just having to move to one place or the other and try not to be killed and their stuff taken. Which wouldn't be a problem on another day, but having like 2 people online who are constantly being hunted down without having a minute to settle is kinda an issue.

Yes, they're probably very happy they can just go back to interacting with their old friends on the server instead of fighting for a bitter win they'd just get a wave of hate like it happened in the last few times. Do they look competitive? They're excited to play the event or to talk with their friends? Genuine question since I can't exactly claim (and I haven't) if the CCs are happy or not after this because I'm not watching. I hated the decision, it isn't what I wanted and thus I'll not watch the event anymore. If the CCs like, good for them.

All my complaints were about the Green team getting unfairly eliminated just to get split. But it's better now, isn't it? Etoiles and Roier are happier now, the fandom is happier now. They just got a mechanic that can make them hunt down people, something they weren't able to do in Green. All their problems got fixed.

I have no idea why you guys are so fixated on the little complaints me and other few people have when you're having such a blast. I'm tagging my posts properly so it's not even like I'm forcing you to see my downer posts. So go enjoy your event.

#qsmp discourse #fandom neg

[davyjoneslockr]

📡🎈 for the writing ask game!!

Super interested especially in the style one because it’s always fun to hear how people see their own writing!

(For this ask game)

📡: Why is writing and sharing your writing important for fandom?

I've been involved in fandom spaces for most of my life, and it's always been something I've been really passionate about, but a lot of that time was spent as sort of a passive lurker. I engaged with other people's content online and went to local cons every now and again, but I always wanted to actually create something myself and feel more involved with fandoms, I guess. I actually had a bit of a run with this in the Danganronpa fandom (I was a voice actor in an unfortunately never released and now defunct Fangan podcast), and that got me thinking about what I could do to engage with fandom more. I've always written fanfic, but it took until a short time after I left the DR fandom and got stuck in JoJo Hell, which was my first year of college, to work up the courage to actually post it.

All this to say, writing and sharing fics makes me feel like an active part of a community. I've made a lot of friends through it, had opportunities to work on some incredible fan projects, and, honestly, the past four years in the JJBA fandom have been the most fun I've had in any fandom. Plus, I think of it as sort of paying homage to this series that I love so dearly. Idk. My work probably isn't all that important to fandom as a whole, but I'm definitely having a good time participating :]

🎈 Describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? Does it change?

That's a hard one, actually. It definitely changes depending on the mood I'm going for, and it's obviously changed over the years (it's actually funny reading back older fics sometimes, because I can tell when certain writing workshops or creative breakthroughs in my academic life bled over into my hobby writing). I'd say my writing is heavily character-driven; while that comes with the medium in fanfiction, my original fiction and creative nonfiction tend to be like that, too. What details I focus on while narrating a scene, and which ones I overlook, should say something about the POV character. Stylistically, I love playing with sentence length. Sentence fragments and run-on sentences are my best friends, and I love you polysyndeton <3 (I notice I used to be really into asyndeton, too, but not so much anymore). The character-driven-ness carries over into the style, too; I tend to get a bit more purple prose-y with Giorno than I do Mista, for example. And I use almost exclusively present tense in my writing now, because I want everything to feel more immediate and immersive - more like watching a scene unfold in real time than recalling a memory, if that makes sense. I actually wanted to be a screenwriter at one point in my life; I guess I could describe my style with regard to that, in a way? Trying to write a film onto a page? Something like that.

#sorry my answer for the style thing isn't super coherent. it's not something i think about much but definitely something i will now!!

[wattpadscapcons]

Thinking about completely restarting my account or just permanently moving to my alt and just doing the requests there. I literally almost have the same amount of posts as I do followers and it's overwhelming.

I could restart so easilyyyyyy! It's so tempting. And don't get me wrong when I say "restart" I don't mean deleting this account. Not that I hadn't thought about that before either with the way some people behave online.

Though I know either way that I'll have to update my DNI and make it clearer bc I've like... been triggered quite a few times this week alone? If you're going to follow me and still disrespect me that's fine, but triggering me? Ohhhh nooo, no, no, no, no, no, I won't put up with that shit.

=

Plus ppl have been like lowkey kinda just bothering me w/ the way they act??? Like I get when you make content other people like and become popular for that you can fall victim to parasocial relationships or idolization but I find that so dumb. Like, I'm a person, not some celebrity? Hello?? So to everyone who's been "afraid to talk to me" or suddenly pop up in my dms with no prompt (and have interacted with me less than 3 times in any setting) + have no interest in talking to me past the point of like sending those spam chainmail things that are all like "send this to [#] of people who made you happy this month" can you like....stop?

It's honestly really discouraging to think that someone from the fandom is messaging me just to give me some spam.

=

It'd be different if someone came into my dms and was all like: "Hey I really like your work/I find your work to be inspiring/It makes me really happy whenever you post about [character] bc I love them sm and the way you write them is comforting/whatever etc!" That actually starts a conversation, gives me feedback on my work, and overall creates more mutuals for me to just interact with.

Tagging me in those like "create your character" threads bugs me too bc I've already told people NOT to tag me in those and I guess some people missed that memo? I mean I know a lot of you interact that way for like fun, but I'm just not into that. You can talk to me in the comments or you can yell at me in the dms. Reblogging is for starting fights and sharing other people's art/writings/edits/articles/videos.

And don't come in here being all like "well I like your stuff all the time isn't that enough??" like that only tells me you bookmarked my work. That doesn't tell me that you actually enjoyed the piece & aren't just looking to make fun of me on some secret discord group chat or something. How do I know you even read what I wrote if you're in here just liking several of my posts and then never interact with my blog again?

=

And god forbid someone not want to interact with me bc of my age, WHY ARE YOU EVEN FOLLOWING ME THEN??? I get it, I must be a dinosaur to some of you. Respect your own DNI! Or even better yet, they don't agree with the people I'm friends with, like I have any affect one what they do with their time.

Give me back my anons that would just send in asks just to say hello or check up on me. This isn't fun anymore. I feel like every time I've talked about this stuff before it's gone totally under the radar.

'People don't care about what you think outside of your fandom writings blah blah blah.' I have the right to be sensitive here. I have the right to feel how I do. If you guys don't give a damn about me, my opinions, and my feelings then just unfollow me right now bc I honestly don't need that in my life.

#serious post #tw rant #this isnt a joke #vent post #tw vent #fandom discussion

[daisymondays]

I hope this isn't an annoying question but I really wanted to ask if "All missing things" will be continued. I dont want this to sound like a "whens an update?" because im not trying to ask that, but if its discontinued or not.

Your writing is just an inspiration and amazing. I couldn't stop reading.

Again I hope im not bothering or anything <3

This isn't an annoying question, and the fact i have more than I can count others in my inbox has been bothering me for a while -- only on a guilt front because I haven't known how to respond and i don't want people to think they're being annoying by asking

I wrote All Missing Things at the tail end of 2017 and it took me 4 months to write. The fact that I wrote 100,000 words and thought that 4 months is a long time to do that in is absolutely wild to me... like what a time!!!!

The reason I've never wanted to answer the question of is there is a sequel is because for the last few years, the answer has felt very clearly to me as a no. I burnt myself out of the Harry Potter fandom with a hyper fixation that my life near enough depended on at the time, but now I don't need. I don't live to write anymore, and while that is possibly the best thing to ever happen to me... It still makes me sad? And it's weird to miss being unhappy because I miss one of the outcomes of being unhappy. Sometimes I really miss the way I used to write. And I say I want to put in a new writing routine, but the truth is I must not that much, or it isn't a priority enough that I sacrifice my job, or cooking or sleep or time with my loved ones for. So occasionally I write or edit, working away on the original fiction story that I've been working on for three years, but it doesn't consume me in the way it used to. I'm not missing enough of myself to let it.

This is all to say, that I don't want to say there's no sequel because I at the time I loved the story I told and I love that people still read it!! People still read things I wrote 6 years ago as a depressed university student and it brings them joy like it did me!! And just thinking about that makes me want to get back into it, to write fanfiction and a sequel to All Missing Things.

Writing fanfiction is so fun for that community, for the encouragement and the comments, and the other people revelling in characters that you love too!! I don't get that editing my own original story by myself. And sometimes the memory of people online liking my writing is what keeps me going with a story that I don't know if anyone will ever read.

I don't want to say there's no sequel because part of me hopes maybe one day I will want to write it. It'll bring me joy again to write these stories, and they won't take up my whole life but they'll be another part of it.

This is a very long answer that you may never read as I can't remember how long ago I received this exact ask. But I was thinking all these things, and I checked my AO3 inbox for the first time in a while and saw a wave of fresh comments and new readers on all of my HP stories, and it made me want to say something even if this answer is more of a non answer.

TLDR: I don't know if I'll ever write a sequel to All Missing Things and I am sorry about that. I miss the girl I was when I wrote that story, but not enough to ever become her again

#literal word vomit of an answer

[aromanticbuck]

I just cheered at your response to your latest ask. I've only been in the 911 fandom since start of S7 but I am really struggling with so many people making Buck's Bi storyline about Eddie. People watch an entire episode through their shipping lenses and it's become so frustrating because this is about BUCK being queer and having positive experiences with men/Tommy. I simply don't read into every buck/eddie interaction the way everyone else seems to because if you step away - it's often not that deep. I think the shippers need to realise that a general viewer of the show and the way the script is at the moment - buddie romantically is not there. Maybe it will be at some point which would be great but my god - let Buck experience this without people constantly making it all about Eddie.

I've written so many posts about it at this point that I've lost count but yes. Exactly.

This is a storyline about Buck realizing his sexuality. Realistically, BuckTommy isn't going to be endgame. Statistically, that's just not going to happen - but they're really cute and I want them to be together for a little while. I love their relationship and how healthy it is. There's communication, and growth, and a sexuality realization arc, and that's so rare to see on TV anymore. I'm so used to my favorite (queer) ships either not being canon or being put through so much drama for the sake of drama that I wish they weren't canon (I think the only exception I can think of here is HenRen), and it's especially rare to see a bisexuality arc treated with so much care and love without it being a stepping-stone to being gay (Netflix you know what you did).

I wish the storyline was treated as well by the fandom as it is by the cast and the writers. Lou and Oliver are doing a fantastic job, and I hope they get to keep doing this job, because I love seeing BuckTommy on my screen. I think they have really good chemistry!

But I know that, realistically, the fandom is just going to keep being Like This. I've been in big fandoms before, and the most popular ships do have a lot of chill fans (I like to think I'm part of that group, but I haven't seen me from the outside, so I'm not a reliable source there), but the ones that are like this - making everything about their ship even when a scene has nothing to do with it, and sometimes nothing to do with either character - are just so loud that they drown everyone else out.

And it sucks, but that's why we curate our own experiences online to the best of our ability. I'm going to try to keep having fun (and write more Kinkley fic when I have time this weekend) and do my best to ignore the loud fans during the hiatus. Hopefully things will quiet down while we're between episodes, or at least the block button will be easier to use (thank goodness for KXit so I can block specific posts, or else I would lose my mind)

And, if you ever need to vent about something, believe me, I will understand. Feel free to message me - either through anon again here in my ask box, or if you want to privately communicate - and I'll commiserate with you happily. 💜

#answered #anon #anonymouse #alex says things #fandoms are big and loud and i am tired

[theghostpinesmusic]

I've been traveling for a bit, so I haven't been watching any new shows, but I have a little catching up to do, so today I'm going to write at you about the 7/29/23 "Fuego"! From Arkansas!

As in "I'm in Arkansas right now," not "This Phish concert was in Arkansas," because it was in New York City, where all Phish concerts are now contractually held.

This was the second show of the summer MSG run, and it was just as good as the first. If I was being a neurotic Fandom fan, I'd say that the first show was a wee bit better because it had better paced-setlist, but I don't rate Phish shows anymore. I'm in recovery!

Anyway, the first set of this show has a freaking excellent, bliss-jammed version of "Down With Disease" as well as a well-placed "Bug," cleanly-played versions of Trey bugbears "Sugar Shack" and "Foam," and closes with a barn-burning version of "Moonage Daydream."

The second set is anchored by the "Fuego," for sure (it's thirty minutes long, as we'll get to), but also has a great post-jam landing pad in "Oblivion," a great ballad tune in "Wingsuit," and a weird and wonderful take on "2001" that melts into some Fishman shenanigans toward the end of the set.

In short and as usual, it's all good, but Phish saw fit to post the "Fuego" online, and I like writing about music a lot but not enough to talk about the whole show in detail, so we're gonna focus on that.

"Fuego," for any uninitiated, is from the same-titled 2014 album, which, like most latter-day Phish albums is weirdly paced but also full of good songs that get shit on because they weren't written in the 90s. "Fuego" in particular is a great example of a post-breakup Phish tune that contains lots of the proggy twists and turns fans say they want to hear in the new tunes, but it often gets poo-poo'd anyway because it isn't literally "You Enjoy Myself" or "Divided Sky."

I like it a lot. It's a fun composition that throws a lot of different ideas out there and, like the best Phish tunes, stitches them together seamlessly. Everyone gets moments to shine, but to me "Fuego" is primarily a Jon Fishman showcase.

Since there are a lot of instrumental passages built into this one, it can be hard for the non-fan to figure out what's composed and what's improvised, so, for your reference, the song proper runs up through 5:15.

From there, we start with what I'd call a typical outro, following the song's chords and Trey playing variations on the song's main melody in a grungy blues tone. While this isn't immediately that exciting, the lights sure are. I seriously can't get over this rig, even just watching from home.

Things start to get a little weirder right before 7:00, when Trey changes his tone to something spacier and chunkier (I think of this as one of his quintessential post-COVID tour tones). It's not until 7:45, though, that we really start to break away from the song entirely. Here, Page adds some synth droning, and Fish starts playing a more complicated beat. Trey reprises the "Fuego" melody a few more times, not entirely letting it go yet, but you feel the band starting to launch.

At 8:35, Trey starts chording instead of solo, and we're off to the races. The lights seems to respond in kind.

Even though we're in a much jauntier, abstract space by 9:15, thanks mostly to Trey and Page's playing, I appreciate that Trey still takes a minute to reprise the "Fuego" melody again, reminding us where we came from.

There's a really gorgeous section of Trey and Page interplay starting at 9:45. Fish and Mike do a great job of filling in the edges here but not getting in the way as the other two play off of each other. This leads into a really upbeat, unique jam section. Mike's bass eventually takes on a sort of droning quality that encircles the jam and holds it in place for a bit.

At 11:20, Fish changes up the beat, and the band moves toward something with a little more form to it. By 11:45, it's Trey and Mike that are playing off of each other, while Page has moved over the clav. For a minute here, it's hard for me to tell which is the guitar and which is the bass, Trey's guitar is so wonderfully distorted.

They come out of the distortion in a bit more of a traditionally Phish-y space, and though Trey seems to struggle playing what he wants to be playing here briefly, it's a nice section of the jam anyway. Fishman's drums remind me a bit of "Manteca," and I found myself singing the lyrics while I was watching this live. The rest of the band seems to lock on to the "Manteca" feel, and we get a jam that highlights Page's piano and Trey's...robot guitar (?) in equal measures.

I didn't pick up Mike's playing on this too much when I watched the whole show because of the mix on the webcast, but I can hear him a lot better now through my headphones and he's a much bigger part of the sound of this jam that I realized before. As usual. Go Mike!

Around 17:15, Trey switches from his murky tone to the quintessential sharp, clear Phish tone and proceeds to absolutely rip a solo. He and Page have another great moment of chemistry here, and though Fishman's initially introduce some tension with the feel-good soloing, eventually he and Mike help power Trey and Page to some major-key fun.

At 19:05, the band engages in some stop-start jamming, which is always good for a few "Woo!"s from the crowd. At 19:35, though, Trey jumps right back into playing smoothly, and leads the rest of the band into what sounds to me for all the world like a "Golden Age" jam. I wondered the first time and again now if they were originally planning to go into "Golden Age" here (I'm not-entirely-but-mostly-sure it's in the same key and everything). Regardless, Mike is an absolute beast out in front of this part of the jam while everyone else is adding some fantastic accents.

To clarify, I am not sad that this jam does not turn into "Golden Age": this section is amazing, and reminds me of some of my favorite dark, funky jamming from the early 2000s, post-hiatus.

It feels to me (again, not a music theory guy) that Trey throws out a key change at 23:28, which changes the feel of the jam again, moving us toward a more uplifting space. Page switches to the piano, Fishman simplifies the beat to something a bit more rock-and-roll, and Mike...well, Mike just keeps doing his Mike thing. Which is fine. It feels though like the band is rounding the bend on the space exploration that has been this jam here, though, and heading back to the barn. If I'm not mistaken, this new section of the jam is in the original key of "Fuego," so we're musically as well as existentially back at home base. Pretty sure Page teases the "Fuego" melody a few times here.

Of course not content to just roll to the finish line, the band takes one last foray into space around 26:30, with Trey moving to the octave shifter and the music becoming...circular? I'm not sure what you'd actually call it, but it's great and the lights are insane. I feel like I'm at EPCOT Center in the 80s. It's these sudden, brief-but-intense forays into different soundscapes that makes me love post-COVID Phish so much (among other things). A show (or a run of shows) with so many of these little moments would have easily been in the conversation for show of the year between 2009 and 2019, but now it's just sort of seen as "normal." I hope it never stops making me as happy as it does now.

Brilliantly, Trey signals the return to "Fuego" at 28:08, at which point, watching live, I remember standing up from the couch and literally pumping my fist at the TV in joy. For the next minute or so, the band expertly weaves the previous jam and the "Fuego" melody in and out of each other as the music ever so slowly winds down. Ultimately, the jam/song lands perfectly in "Oblivion," though, unfortunately, the stand-alone YouTube video cuts off before you get to hear it.

It's wild to listen to this again and immediately think that if this had been a jam at, say, a 2014 or 2018 show, it would likely have automatically been seen as the jam of the year. Here, in 2023, it's just one of many such performances I've already seen in the first four shows of this seven show run, and is probably outclassed by at least a few jams from the band's December MSG run (as well as the recent 2024 Mexico run that I haven't listened through yet). It's a crazy time to be getting back into Phish, and it's moments like these that have me thinking about making the drive out to Denver this summer for the first time since 2017 to see them play for four nights.

Anyway, more from summer 2023 soon!

FUEGOOOOOOOOOOO

#phish #music #live music #videos #jams #jam bands #tour journal #writing #trey anastasio #Youtube

[chaostheatre]

I wish Gidsmona was still an active ship but I don’t blame you for not wanting to write about it bc everyone’s just disappeared. Part of it is probably that the Gideon tag is filled with only content about the anime minus a couple posts about being in love with JS. But also there was no interaction between Ramona and Gideon like there was with any of the other exes, so the new fans that haven’t read the comics probably won’t start shipping gidsmona :/ I feel like it’s gone from julie/gideon being the rare pair to Julie/gideon being second (with Matthew and Gideon being shipped way more???) and gidsmona literally fading into obscurity. It’s kinda sad imo. Once again, I don’t blame you for separating or not writing.

I like julie and gideon <3 happy for them

in all honesty it's not so much the anime or the lack of popularity (as if it's ever been a popular ship outside of us 2 or 3 with domestic abuse trauma lol) it's more so that this franchise as a whole has outwelcomed its stay for me. this has been a pretty long fixation (2 odd years?) to begin with and by april or may I was already starting to drag my feet about it. I did stick around longer cause my friends are here and writing gideon is astonishingly easy and fun when I need a warm-up. but overall I have had nooooo interest in rewatching the movie or rereading the books or really anything for a long time.

I also feel like I have a very different relationship with 'shipping' things than most people. I am first and foremost an analyst. gidsmona has always been a case study for me, and sometimes a comfort thing for my ptsd. I'm not really a shipping type of person, especially not canon x canon lol.

and it feels like I've been in this fandom a lot longer than I actually have just by how much of a presence I've had here. I still see my memes floating around on twitter and instagram, my account names mentioned in comment sections, etc etc... so it's like I don't really care about this series but I feel like there's a part of me that's irrevocably tied to it

the anime itself I don't really care about. it is what it is. I'm not being petty by not watching it, I literally just... don't care. I knew that they were gonna do what they did to gideon anyway. plus I hate hate hate people, I am extremely agoraphobic and that includes online, and crowded spaces are not my jive.

maybe in a parallel universe where it released BEFORE glorious masquerade I would've watched it but alas. roro <3 I love you roro. gideon is important and I do credit him with helping me leave my abuser way back when but unfortunately this franchise is NEVER gonna hold a candle to how insanely important disney's hond is to me. that stupid fucking movie drags me back into hell with it every time. I'm gonna kill that fucking mouse.

so anyway I'm still hanging around for fun but this isn't really my place anymore

[rhysand-vs-fenrys]

The link for the Dumb Husky recommendation doesn't work?

Yeah, the online translations were pulled down, as it is about to be published in English (but they actually used the fan translation for the English publication, so those people got some $).

November 15 the first book in that series comes out in English. It'll be in book stores and online.

I know it's not part of the ask, but just... If you were planning to read it, something I think has to be said.

I put the recommendation here, but just based on my experience... A very large chunk of this fandom- dare I say majority- cannot handle reading Dumb Husky and his White Cat Shizun.

This analogy is not in any way stretched or inappropriate. In fact, the situation in 2ha (The novel's nickname) is actually much, much worse::

Amarantha does everything she does- I mean EVERYTHING, including the abuse of Rhysand. Rather than being killed, Amarantha utterly destroys everything, even Velaris, and in the end, Rhys as well. And then she decides it's no fun anymore and digs herself a grave. But instead of dying, she wakes up as a young woman in Prythian again, and not that long before she becomes evil. Amarantha is around Rhysand again, and she fantasizes about torturing him all over again. But Rhys begins to have visions of the past- when she abused him before- and as horrifying as those visions are... He thinks his mind is just kinky in an unacceptable way, but still... kinda likes it. HOWEVER, Amarantha starts to realize that all of her hatred towards Rhys was built on a fundamental misunderstanding, and when she realizes the truth of the singular event that turned her overwhelmingly evil in the past, she is utterly destroyed and devastated. So for years, she punishes herself over and over again in greater and greater ways until she realizes that in her grief and horror over what she did in a life that doesn't even exist anymore, she has turned herself into a shining reflection of Rhysand. From the blackest of villains to the greatest of heroes. But something- or someone- is responsible for Amarantha waking up to live a new life, and they will do anything to turn her back to the darkness she has given everything to escape.

Like, THAT is the story being told.

The extreme abuse is prevalent throughout the novel, I don't think at any point you go 10 chapters without some form of flash back to it. But it isn't glorified, it's explored, expanded, and Mo Ran (the 'Amarantha' figure) spends literal years ripping himself apart over a timeline that has been erased. (and the ‘Rhysand’ figure is... intrigued)

So yeah... Your ask was about the link, but I did want to just put a warning SOMEWHERE about the level of mental maturity it will take people to read this. That's also why it has so many trigger warnings listed below the recommendation.

But also like... I really love the story.

#ask

[incarnateirony]

Hi. Saw an interesting video on the Rust shooting in comparison to Brandon Lee. Has a few extra details I wasn’t aware of. https://youtu.be/z4W7kbQA8AU

Wow, that was not how I wanted to find out Massey died (to the younger crowd not familiar with the Crow incident beyond the buzz they're hearing about online, in this fandom, you would probably know him best as Kubrick, Gordon's friend in early Supernatural.) Didn't exactly track him closely, obviously, but that was an unexpected additional Sad.

There's a few details I'd disagree with in the video (beyond the blatant attempt to argue some 2A nut shit on the lowkey at one point--why did Baldwin trust that if he's anti-gun? Because the system works, and has always worked like that, and pattern makes life, this isn't hard, promise he won't make that mistake again), but they're sort of trivial and hair splitting compared to the value of the overall video. Part of what ripped Massey up was, yeah, "I didn't check the gun", but that section dude has about like, platitudes that are true but unhelpful, one of those was the fact that he wasn't even supposed to in film standard. It doesn't make the shock and hurt and horror of pulling that trigger go away, so telling him that didn't make it better, but I do feel like that's a detail to clarify.

You just... don't micromanage other departments, you're not supposed to interfere with that. It's not an actor's job to decide what's safe or not as a general sentiment, and that does in fact include guns. Now, whether that's a smart call or not is a whole other thing, but beyond smartness of gun safety there's the reality of actors all slowing things down between shoots to quadruple check something that was already supposed to be cleared by other departments and hell, even possibly fucking up loaded effects shells ironically by their fucking around with it, when they're not the ones trained to load that shit. It's sort of a doublesided thing on that end. Setting that as a routine could have just as much if not worse blowback than the current system.

Frankly we just shouldn't be using real guns in 2021 anymore, gun kick logic or not. Get some goddamn hollywood ordered airsoft guns and add the flash later, there's your kick. But "shoulda woulda coulda"s of the industry that don't exist really aren't the topic here.

What sticks out to me most was the detail I DIDN'T know yet: that the armorer admitted to not just being unexperienced in loading shells, but nervous and not feeling ready to do it yet safely. Which, I'm just saying, probably true with everything considered. But at the end of the day, she took that job, she signed that paper, and she put that responsibility in her hands.

There's things the video doesn't cover, like the use of guns supposedly being used for target/hunting fun outside of work by crew members fucking off, and if we have a self admitted underskilled armorer, it might not have been cleaned properly, meaning anything from like "gunpowder" residue (to laymans terms it) to fragments could have been there, either propelling the shell itself, or sending a fragment of a previous shell out, if not just an outright fuckup of it being a wholeassed bullet. Which, if the shot went through her chest, out the other side and still hit another person, that doesn't just sound like a shell or even a shard getting fired, but I could be wrong. But if she can't tell the difference between a blank and a bullet we have bigger problems here.

At the end of the day, Baldwin isn't even the kind of producer responsible for hiring her, or negotiating with unions or anything. He's just a lead in a low budget film that will get a percentage of profits rather than an upfront check, thereby making him a producer as well. Whole other ballgame.

But even if he was, let's say a restaurant owner is trying to start cheap, and makes his own shanty where he's his own chef, but pays a cheap service to install his gas range stove. The service installs it wrong and at some point, there's a gas leak, he turns it on, it explodes, and people at the restaurant die.

He's the chef that turned the knob. In this case, he isn't even the owner that made the call for the cheap service--but if he was, the cheap service company is liable for those deaths. At best the restaurant probably gets a fine as insult over injury for not being up to some kind of code, but turning that knob wasn't a crime, the cut corners on the installation were. No matter how much people want someone to blame and the chef is there in the smoke, horrified-- he's just the dude who went to turn on a device that theoretically should have been harmless.

And of course, there's the stage of the Associate Director not doing his end of the checks, which would be like a safety inspector calling clear on the place because he didn't really look, and the gas line erupted. Then yeah, that inspector is gonna be hella liable too. But literally the last liability is the chef that just went to turn on the goddamn knob on something that should have been safe.

Whether people's anger is righteous or not, his toughest ride is going to be the court of public opinion and his own self judgment. I'd be surprised if he even gets a fine, since he's a nominal producer. But Baldwin isn't any more of an irredeemable bastard than Massey was.

We can ask al day why it was pointed at the directors, but we don't know yet. Might have been the shot. Shoulda woulda coulda used remote cameras but it's low budget, cut corners happen, who knows? We don't have an explanation of that and regardless, it was a cold gun supposedly, so it should have been no more threat than any other unloaded gun.

Annnnd that's my take.

#rust #alec baldwin #iatse