#i've already read it anyways

[unproduciblesmackdown]

Lackadaisy Enrichment

#in our enclosures!! #video linked as source; which i'm glad to see already has a million views and is trending. That's Right #lackadaisy #WHICH i have been reading since at least '07 when i was thirteen my god b/c this animation is based on the ongoing webcomic #like does its influence show up Directly in some Discrete way i can point to in my art? not very easily probably. And Yet. #the inspiration....i wasn't able to be Regularly Only for at least another year / art done Nonprofessionally Online was novel to me #like wow ppl can make & post fanart of w/e they love huh....didn't know webcomics were a thing & i never really read that many since but. #good god the quality of Lackadaisy at its onset is like this is superb?? this person putting in all their talent and effort??? #and Then you get years & years more art and i don't even know what superlatives to throw out abt its quality as it evolves. obsessed w/it.. #if i see a new lackadaisy comic page i Will be acting out. obviously this animation is a delight & also stunning. and fascinating to also #juxtapose as a Translation / Interpretation of the comic in a different medium & standalone snippet of Story #and that we're not even quite there in the comic timeline; Taking Notes abt character info we get distilledly here....genuinely love like #take it back to '07 i'm like oh boy can't wait for the dream team to assemble. then a decade later when it did? Oh Boy. that is payoff lol #namely hooray for stitches and mudbug at the field office for every passing gangster. killing one marigold associate but not the other #which seems like a promising start to shootouts w/the other dream team triumvirate. i adore that in canon so far mordecai freckle & rocky #have met but only over a nice brunch. re: all intentions anyways. anyways i'm like Gifs Must Be Made while i'm also so riled afresh abt the #comic that i've been sooo hype for for over fifteen yrs now babeyyy Deservedly. i've done a couple of rereads & ought to do another.... #For Interest it'd probably take a few sittings to catch up from the start but there is much to be engaged over....this ongoing story that's #historical fiction prohibition bootlegging cats with plenty of focus on characters & several Mysteries. which i'm better at parsing now lol #like one of the more recent rereads like Oh Of Course x (probably) accidentally killed his y & z took the fall & that's a binding secret... #Not [oh of course] abt the circumstances surrounding a's death & how b & c were involved. nor the ''what's marigold's damage'' mystery #which is great. love to not know things. love that we can readily follow all the emergent drama everyone's wading in nowadays. hell yeah #anyways admire my organized approach to gifs here. four shots each Expressions Atmosphere Action Groupshots #sure might've muddled through gifmaking for this anyways but fr being a huge lackadaisy comic enjoyer for now most of my life helps #and its very Overall Inspiration like. just really getting the [you can really just draw stuff out here] going. fr the art's detail & skill #and that enrichment like i'm gonna have a great time following this. And I Have #you don't expect a crowdfunded indie animation in the mix back then but hell yeah fellas #SIGH ok removing a 4th gif that's broken / not displayed despite reuploading then entirely remaking it. if it's a bug i'll try again later

[svogliata-mente]

gintama said you have to live even if life sucks and it's embarrassing even if you only live for the small things even if you live day by day still you have to live. and it said when you live you pick up the burden that is caring about other people and you have to carry it always even if it's heavy even if you feel like you can't anymore even if you don't even realize you're carrying it until you drop it and you never ever want to pick it up again because what if you drop it this time too how can you do it all again but you do you always do. and it said when you care about someone else they care about you too. when you protect something it protects you back. how can this burden be so heavy when you're all carrying it together

#but also it said what if you woke up one day with a screwdriver dick would that be fucked up or what #in other words I've read it at the perfect time in my life and i will forever be normal about this i prommy #gintama #ah-ha i knew i said all of that already i have like three thoughts total #anyway @ali i was trying to say this but even less coherently #(this was in my drafts btw. in case that wasn't clear)

[acekindaneat]

an evil spirit and an ex-terrorist getting along? mayhaps.

#ekuseri #ekuserirei #serirei #(kind of. tagging it just in case) #serizawa katsuya #ekubo #mp100 #mp100 fanart #mi art stuff #ok hiii tag reader :]]] i am once again gonna ramble #bc i have been thinking a LOT about these two. #and i desperately need more of them #idk why. i cant explain it either but i'm brainrotting so hard it's worrying /j #anyway thats all from now hehe #thanks for reading my rambling mwah have a nice day <333 #i've already posted this on instagram but i'm bad at cross posting or smth HJDKFKRG

[mydetheturk]

wolfwood kept vash's gun. wolfwood kept vash's colt. wolfwood picked up the gun of a man who terrified him and kept it with him for two years.

just to give it back.

and the worst part is? if it hadn't been wolfwood, someone else would have found vash. vash is being tracked the whole volume - guarantee if wolfwood hadn't approached vash first, lina and granny would have died.

catching vash like this, giving his gun back, and telling vash that knives is back over a meal is the kindest way vash was going to go back to being Vash.

It's the kindest thing Wolfwood could have done.

#trigun #trigun maximum #trimax #trigunbookclub #myde reads trigun #i've already read the whole series and know what's coming up #its the kindest way vash could have run into the ghg anyway #trigun meta

[nemomo]

extremely self indulgent doodle of a buncha teenagers

[Image ID: Digital art headshots on a light yellow background of, from left to right, Seiya, Hyoga, Ikki, Shun and Shiryu from Saint Seiya. Ikki in the middle is crying, and they are all smiling up at him. /End ID.]

#saint seiya #knights of the zodiac #sts #les chevaliers du zodiaque #los caballeros del zodiaco #pegasus seiya #cygnus hyoga #phoenix ikki #andromeda shun #dragon shiryu #saint seiya fanart #fanart #nemomo arts #i've been meaning to draw sts stuff forever aaaaaaah #first time sketching the bronze babies except for shun which i have uh tried drawing twice already but never finished #anyways i've read the manga two years ago and am currently at episode thirty something of the anime #can't wait to meet all the og golds again #kotz #cdz

[mintjeru]

it probably wasn't the smartest decision to start an ongoing 1000+ chapter webnovel when i know it'll consume my every waking thought but here we are

open for better quality | no reposts

#turning novel #터닝 #kishiar la orr #yuder aile #when i tell you i read the manhwa in one go last night and then started reading the novel today bc commenters said it was good #and my god were they right #i'm 40+ chapters in so i've just passed where the manhwa is at rn and wow #first of all thank god there are high quality and easily accessible translations #second of all kuyu-nim has a way of making all the lines carry weight. the dialogue and body language cues especially #like i'm definitely not that far in but there are already a few lines i can point out that made my heart clench #and the tension between the two leads is so so palpable #kishiar is very enigmatic i'm very interested in finding out what he's really thinking and what his abilities are #and i really appreciate the way yuder's development is focused on him caring about others and relying on them #ok and third the fact that it's a slow burn romance but focuses heavily on the plot and politics and relationships is so good #based on the tags this could have been very tropey but they didn't go that route and i'm glad for it #in other news i'm upset about how yuder came out but i have to post him bc i will not separate them ;;; #thought kishiar would be harder to draw bc he's pretty:tm: and i struggle drawing pretty boys but yuder put me through the wringer fr #anyway!! i love them very much!! going a little insane over them as you can see!!

[diezmil10000]

man i wish i could mute notifications from specific posts here on tumblr. my dunmeshi fanarts are literally eating up my notifications tab and it's impossible to see if people have left nice notes on other posts, which was genuinely the best thing about this app. on top of that, since the anime is basically mainstream, it's also impossible to read notes from people who are insane about it and which i would want to read if i wasn't fed up.

#petty complaint from someone with a big follower count i know #but if you've been following me for a while you know i've never asked for this #i don't want to be known just because i drew the popular ship of the moment #(and it's already happened so i can't change it) #and don't get me wrong i LOVE everything about falin and marcille #but i think my point comes across right? #anyway. i love you if you've read this far. thank you for your time and support. have an amazing day <3

[welcometogrouchland]

your talia in your newest comic is very pretty 💜 shiny hair save me….

AHH THANK YOU SM I didn't shade her hair originally when I was coloring cause I was trying to streamline things but it looked so incomplete without it...I can't help it if she has L'Oreal model energy. Anyway you're always really nice on my Steph posts so here's some misc Stephs I had lying around as thanks for this ask (feat one of those alt cowl designs i posted back when!)

#dc comics #dc #stephanie brown #batgirl #batgirls #asks #i have many wips that I don't feel are worthy of posting but yknow? these ones aint half bad #I've already done a lot of my essential steph reading so now I'm just looking for other stuff shes been in #she's briefly in the GA trade I'm reading rn! big win! I didn't even know that when i bought it but fate is fate #I'm gonna read batgirls at some point but i have to be in a headspace for it w/ the requisite amount of context #also i know it's one of those series you need to stick with to get the maximum amount of enjoyment with it #since every review I've read has said ''i know it starts off rough but PLEASE just get past the midpoint it gets better'' #so i gotta be in that headspace too #(demons in my head saying 'or you could just reread cass' batgirl run' and I'm like STOP I NEED TO FINISH GA AND BB LEAVE ME BE!!!) #anyway thank you for this it was really nice <3 #mine

[ohitslen]

BREAKING NEWS 🎉Ch. 5 of The neighbor from 311 is up!🎉

#Yo hi its me. I forgot to post here when I updated chapter 4 ...well now there is two instead of just one! ✌(for the ones that still haven't #read chapter 4 anyways-) #updating was tricky since I've been so busy with uni and my personal life so. hobby writing was reserved for when I had free time #and only sometimes when I felt like it bc I won't torture my eyes with more screen time than the one I already have throughout the day #This was fun to write as usual :) I am excited to write the next chapter and how things will start to unfold from now on! #Oh I have also started to read dungeon meshi. I'm loving it. #the neighbor from 311 #trigun #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #vashwood #trigun stampede #wolfwood #vash #nicholas trigun #trigun fanart #reincarnation au #Trigun au #lenssi writes #lenssi draws #trigun fic #trigun fanfiction

[mrghostrat]

I feel like I say it everytime but honestly fucking my god that chapter man. Look at them!!! Again so thankful for how you write Crowleys asexuality, I feel like it's the first time I've seen it portrayed in a way that fits if that makes sense Also eternally grateful for the way you add NSFW skips and how your footnotes link back to the text, it makes a world of difference (like I cannot explain how the footnote thing improves my experience thank you thank you)

i am SO grateful for all the love for my ace experience. it's so cool and validating to have so many people relating to this crowley 😭 and that even the people who don't relate to it are still enjoying his narrative. thank you

#ask a rat #bnf au #i also 100% understand people who don't want to read smut and yet want to engage w fics so they skip over smut scenes #but it's so soso s so cool the few comments i've already gotten from people who were GOING to skip but decided to read anyway #im so happy you enjoyed it and found it a realistic and fun scene

[justastrugglinghotchocolate]

Ya’ll I used to jokingly consider this, but nah, there is enough evidence in the book to suggest:

Henry ruins Dorian out of spite and jealousy towards Basil for moving on from him.

Let’s get right into this. 

I went back into the book because I wanted to review the post I made about Henry and misogyny earlier. Besides the usual annoyance at Henry’s dumb stupid rant, I noticed this line:

“I had buried my romance in a bed of asphodel.”

And then it hit me that Henry’s worst rants about women only come after the topic of marriage, but more specifically, commitment. Which then led to an even more interesting idea: I’m pretty sure Henry mostly uses ‘women’ as cover to complain about Basil and Basil’s ‘lack of commitment to him.’

I want to note that there’s a lot of interesting things in regards to Henry and his relationship with women that I’d love to go into, but this will focus solely on him and Basil.

Here’s what Henry says in his misogynistic ass rant after Sibyl dies. (This is from the 1891 ver):

“But [Sibyl] would have soon found out that you were absolutely indifferent to her. And when a woman finds that out about her husband, she either becomes dreadfully  dowdy, or wears very smart bonnets that some other woman’s husband has to pay for.”

Basil is often considered ‘unfashionable’/‘dowdy’ by Henry’s standards. This is only further proven in what he says about Basil’s disappearance:

“Why should he have been murdered? He was not clever enough to have enemies. Of course, he had a wonderful genius for painting. But a man can paint like Velasquez and yet be as dull as possible. Basil was really rather dull. He only interested me once, and that was when he told me, years ago, that he had a wild adoration for you and that you were the dominant motive of his art.”

But that isn’t all. The last part of that quote matches one to one to Henry’s claim about women (or Sibyl, specifically). Basil was not only ‘dull’, but his only ‘fashionable’ attribute, his art, grew ‘dowdy’ once he discovered Dorian’s indifference to him.

Henry also says this about women:

“Good resolutions are useless attempts to interfere with scientific laws. Their origin is pure vanity. Their result is absolutely nil.”

And later:

“But women never know when the curtain has fallen. They always want a sixth act, and as soon as the interest of the play is entirely over, they propose to continue it. If they were allowed their own way, every comedy would have a tragic ending, and every tragedy would culminate in a farce. They are charmingly artificial, but they have no sense of art.”

Guess who makes resolutions regarding goodness? Basil, who refuses to believe that Dorian is nothing but a good, pure man. 

“[Basil] could not bear the idea of reproaching [Dorian] any more. After all, his indifference was probably merely a mood that would pass away. There was so much in him that was good, so much in him that was noble.”

Basil’s arc traditionally should have ended once Dorian rejects him. Between that chapter and the chapter where Basil dies, there is no mention of Basil in any form. By all means, Basil’s role in the story is over—and then he demands the ‘sixth act’ to confront Dorian.

And finally:

“Besides, nothing makes one so vain as being told that one is a sinner. Conscience makes egotists of us all. Yes; there is really no end to the consolations that women find in modern life. Indeed, I have not mentioned the most important one.”

“What is that, Harry?” said the lad listlessly.

“Oh, the obvious consolation. Taking some one else’s admirer when one loses one’s own.”

Now before I point out the obvious irony of Henry literally 'taking someone else's admirer' (henry actually has a lot in common with his 'criticisms' of women), I want to bring your attention to a key part we don’t discuss enough about in the book.

““Life has always poppies in her hands. Of course, now and then things linger. I once wore nothing but violets all through one season, as a form of artistic mourning for a romance that would not die. Ultimately, however, it did die. I forget what killed it. I think it was her proposing to sacrifice the whole world for me. That is always a dreadful moment. It fills one with the terror of eternity. Well—would you believe it?—a week ago, at Lady Hampshire’s, I found myself seated at dinner next the lady in question, and she insisted on going over the whole thing again, and digging up the past, and raking up the future. I had buried my romance in a bed of asphodel.”

So I’m gonna make an educated guess and say Henry is lying his ass off here. He did not have a ‘romance’ with a woman. He certainly did not get an emotional, romantic attachment with a ‘woman’. I feel comfortable saying this because 1) his general distaste for women literally points to this being bullshit and 2) a significant change that was made from the 1890 version of the book to the 1891 version.

This is the quote in 1890:

“I once wore nothing but violets all through one season, as mourning for a romance that would not die.”

This is 1891:

“I once wore nothing but violets all through one season, as a form of artistic mourning for a romance that would not die.”

Well, well, well, who is the arti—It’s Basil. He’s literally talking about Basil here. AND GUESS WHAT VIOLETS MEAN IN VICTORIAN FLOWER LANGUAGE?

A couple of things actually, but the top three are:

‘Faithfulness, Modesty, and Love.’

Henry emotionally had been faithful to Basil. While I doubt he was monogamous in anyway, Basil held a special place that no else would ever have. Not even Dorian.

And this brings me back to the quote that originally sent me down this rabbit hole:

“I had buried my romance in a bed of asphodel.”

In the 1890 version, it says:

“I had buried my romance in a bed of poppies.”

Poppies are known to mean death and would have fit perfectly if Henry was saying he felt nothing for the relationship, but what does asphodel mean?

‘Love Beyond The Grave’, ‘Remembered Beyond The Tomb’ and sometimes, ‘My regrets follow you to the grave’. 

(NOTE: please keep in mind floriography could mean certain things based on the color and the type of flowers. That being said, considering Wilde described the shit out of every setting he wrote, the lack of detail about the flowers suggest the most broad meaning is meant to be taken.)

Henry isn't over Basil. He couldn't kill the love, so he buried it and took Dorian as a consolation and revenge. He will never be able to get over Basil until Basil or himself dies.

BOY DO I HAVE GOOD NEWS FOR HENRY/s

#long post #this is an opinion and a theory. #the picture of dorian gray #basil hallward #dorian gray #henry wotton #book theory #been workshopping this for some time #this post is very long and i didn't even get to go into my favorite example ;-; #anyways shout out to TheMissingMask on Ao3 for writing the fanfic that first got me into this theory. Their fanfic Eros is really good!! #You should read it #honestly read all their tpodg fics #does this make me an english major? uh oh #if someone else has made this kind of post already my bad lol #use this as supplemental or even confirmation #i will be back with the more headcanon-y part that relates to the first chapter alone. but for now i've got a chapter to finish ;)

[adhd-merlin]

ao3 author: so they have to take part in this ancient pagan ritual. merlin is wearing bottoms made of fur and a pair of ram's horns. arthur chases him as he runs away and tackles him to the groun—

me: horns?

ao3 author: part of the ritual

me: of course

ao3 author: he tackles him to the ground. they are both drugged out of their minds, btw

me: yeah, go on

#yeah it's from that 870k words fic #listen. in the context of the fic it makes sense. kinda. #fvcking to save the crops or something idk #but no the fic is great actually tbh #i've only read bits of it so far because it's soooo long #but i think i had already read some of part 1 at some point? i half-remember some scenes #anyway. love the characterisation #love whatever is going on between these two #asexual x biromantic gay dynamic or something #but without the labels!! #complex messed up feelings and confusing messed up sɘx #love to see it. ticks so many of my boxes #forget the tropes be interesting!! #make readers go “idk what the fuck is going on here but I love the energy" #that's what fanfic is for tbh #merlin #merlin fanfic #merlin fanfiction #merthur #fandom #the hands of a hundred winters

[chiropteracupola]

finally... the blonde sailor collection...

(l -> r: ben hawkins, jack aubrey, william laurence, røde ruben, alexander smollett, chadwick goodfellow, & gwilym parry)

[ben, goodfellow, and parry have been lent to me by @benjhawkins, @natdrinkstea, and @sailorpants, and the delightful idea of collecting this lad pile was inspired by @gigamuffin!]

#em draws stuff #aubreyad #temeraire #kaptein sabeltann #treasure island #moth and compass #shipshape game #<- no character tags today because there'd be just a Boatload of organizational tags... #I have been wanting to do something like this for Actual Years and then I started reading temeraire and Oh Another One of Them #and then I just sort of Had to. anyway I think I missed somebody but I've already stayed up til 1am drawing this. Enough! :)

[crimeronan]

there are literally incalculable meta posts i could make about the silt verses (it’s one of those stories where i have thoughts about Every Damn Line) but tonight i’m thinking about how..... DELICIOUSLY it sets up and then subverts your worldbuilding expectations.

if you haven’t listened yet. consider this mini essay my pitch. (or rather one of many pitches.)

because you start with this narrative episode about two members of an outlawed religion seeking other members of their faith, and they’re both compelling and sympathetic and layered narrators, but also. one is describing a childhood built on drowning and torturing people to death and the other is delighted by sacrificial corpses and horrific apparitions of eldritch nonsense and you’re like, “okay, yeah, this is a horror podcast. i can pretty damn well see why your religion is outlawed jesus FUCK you guys how is there THIS MUCH MURDER involved in your religious rites-”

and one of the narrators tells you that society is hypocritical because the legal religions Also cause harm. and if you’re anything like me, you go okay, girl, whatever you need to tell yourself to justify your current crusade. your god is a special kind of fucked up but it’s all good

then of course there are hints of social worldbuilding that challenge this assumption, but it’s not until paige’s introduction ep that you’re smacked Full In The Face with like. All Of It. 

because paige is a law-abiding citizen high up on the corporate food chain, and she works a mundane job at a branding company. 

and the company’s margins are bad. 

and the company’s industry is shrinking. 

and the company needs to cut costs and reinvigorate its own brand. 

and of course this is a difficult time for everyone but flexibility is necessary to stay competitive in a cutthroat world.

and now the company is torturing its low-performing employees to death in front of everyone as a corporate ritual. viscerally described. 

and paige, who JUST watched her closest work friend die in the most horrific way imaginable, is playing her part as someone high up on the corporate food chain.

she is being upbeat and being cheerful and encouraging her surviving coworkers to “look lively” and pretending that nothing happened. 

and not a single person protests. and no one shrieks in horror and everyone shifts back into their worksona and the day passes without any particular note because this is a social norm and layoff-sacrifices are too commonplace to report and it is legal and it is accepted and it is a good way to boost the flagging numbers for the giant capitalist machine.

and you have this realization that. 

this Really Is how the world is. 

there really ISN’T anything separating the outlaw narrators’ rituals from those of the corporate and city-based gods.

and then the follow-up question becomes, “wait, then why is THEIR god banned?? if it’s not the murder and the horror then why is their god banned???? what’s the fucking difference????”

and the answer is that their outlawed god draws people away from the cities and the factories and the oil rigs and the pollution and the mineshafts. and their outlawed god does not contribute anything to the state. 

and it’s not about what people worship or what the gods want or what the rituals require or what the hallowed bodies look like.

it’s just about how The State (TM) and Capitalism (TM) are both systems that have weaponized the law to kill every god that doesn’t contribute to their money and power and exploitation and culture and control.

and then it’s.... it’s not about the horror anymore.

it’s not a story of two deeply flawed protagonists from a sick and twisted cult who are reasonably forced into the shadows of a largely normal world because They Are In A Horror Story, And Are Doing What Horror Protagonists Do (Being Fucking Crazy).

it’s a story about our world. the one we live in. we the listener. here in our modern-ass non-supernatural late-stage-capitalism world. it’s about all the structures we’ve built and burned and all the destruction at the center of that goddamn world.

the eldritch gods and terrors are just set dressing.

#fuck me i'm a sucker for stories where all the supernatural and religious shit is a metaphor for something much different #anyway there's so much going on thematically that i genuinely think everyone will take something different away from it. which Fucks #i realize an unbelievably long meta essay is not a snappy pitch But. #the people who pause to read this meta essay are already in the category of People Who Will Probably Like This Story #long post #silt verses #the silt verses #this doesnt even touch on ANYTHING in ANY of the other eps like FUCK the way heyward and the farmer with the god of hunger add to this? #AAAAAA. FUCK. SO FUCKING GOOD. SO FUCKING GOOD #violence #murder #i've been slightly hyperfixated on this story lately we'll see how long that lasts. it's just so good

[dropthedemiurge]

I've seen things after SOTUS extreme actor harassment, I've been here through BMF "hate watching flashmob" and you know what, this year I will actually stop tolerating BL fans (at least on tumblr) who don't even have the decency to just ignore things they don't like and who think bullying someone is a good fandom sport, and start calling out. No matter if you believe clickbaits or you're a proud member of celebrity witchhunt or just don't believe people and situations can change, whatever, I really don't want to see KristSingto hate if - when - they will come back with another BL series.

Peraya fans have been waiting and hoping for KristSingto reunion for years, they wanted it themselves for so long as well, and we've unfortunately encountered way too many people who don't use their braincells and who encourage others to follow their footsteps when making derogatory comments about (mainly) Krist or Singto who they don't even know about, or their shows. For years. Some even go to talk shit and laugh right at his face. What the hell.

Maybe don't ruin someone else's parade and don't turn a nice community lake into a swamp. If you consider yourself a good person who can have an opinion "I just don't vibe with this person/show", watch it unbiased, be open minded and if you don't have a full picture, ask fans of the actual story or do research and read proper compilations about him instead of blindly stacking your opinions on repeated echoed insults from yt and tiktok. And if you aren't willing to be open minded and rational, well, let the fans celebrate and stick quietly to your swamp.

It's really no fun to gather around to discuss something and slip on poop piles thrown around for no reason. What happened to civil discussions?

#this might sound harsh #but i've watched many shows over the past few years and read a lot of opinions #and bl fans were vile for nothing about no other popular bl actor as much as Krist #all the snide remarks in metas and retold HoRriBle RuMoRs for someone who really does not deserve it #and who has been battling mental health for years already #it really became a popular witchhunt and the last year showed that people are still happy to engage in it #even when the extreme viewers pressure and harrassment is exactly what created an issue in the first place #people do deserve to be called out when they are being ugly to others #my heart still hurts for bmf tbh because it's a beautiful and well crafted meaningful show with good acting #but people ignored it because some popular accs decided to be bitch about it because Krist was in it #OR they wrote meta and excited fans had to read discussions enduring all the - ew considering Krist it is not too bad - posts #just ffs #why people still do it #there are amazing posts with explanations or updates or just showing how good of a person Krist is #why don't you read those first and form a proper opinion if you take time to hate on him anyway #kristsingto #krist perawat #singto prachaya #peraya

[transmascutena]

these lines hit different when you read utena as transmasc

#i mean the first one is really awful regardless. #pretty sure i read somewhere that the words akio uses means something along the lines of 'you really should remain a child' #as opposed to 'you really should remain the gender that you are.' which speaks to his whole thing about keeping these kids from growing up #and there's So Much in anthy's line even without hypothetical misgendering #anyway the au where utena has already transitioned by the time he gets to ohtori is really good #and i of course have lots of headcanons about post-ohtori utena and gender #but i've been thinking about one where he's actively questioning while he's there and is not out to anyone. #and i guess not a lot would really change but akio's attempt at making utena more feminine would have a whole other layer of awful to it #and unfortunately i think in this scenario the first person he would come out to would be akio. which is so sad #like maybe it could be anthy but idk. i think it would be something he'd be apprehensive to be open about with her #(in the show utena does tend to be more vulnerable with akio than with anthy. at least the vulnerability with him comes first. #he's her go-to person for advice in the black rose arc and utena doesn't really begin opening up to anthy like that until the third arc) #maybe i should write something for this au. i can see it so clearly. #utena talking about his confusing gender feelings in one of those black rose scenes in the planetarium #and akio doing that thing where he sounds supportive and helpful but absolutely isn't. #that fake sympathy that's actually really patronizing and condescending and dismissive but subtly enough that utena doesn't realize it #and THEN the contrast when utena finally talks to anthy about it and she empathises by talking about her own confusing gender feelings #(transfem anthy realness !!!!!) #oh wow i did not mean to write so much in the tags #revolutionary girl utena #utena tenjou #my posts