#idk im just fascinated by the concept of identity

[crowdsourcedloner]

okay so nailah has a whole ~thing~ about people using her name and how she’s perceived so here’s the long explanation/story about it (covers pre-arr up through the end of base arr)

(it gets heavy - this is your warning. also ~1k words. sorry.)

As a kid, her mother Tasya would rarely use Nailah’s name, choosing instead to just call her “girl” or “child” the majority of the time. In the very rare times she’d praise her daughter, Tasya would say it quietly, and only ever in private. Nailah internalized the idea that a name is a vulnerable thing - something delicate, reserved only for people one deeply trusted. She projected this rule on others as well, picking up the habit of calling people by their job or title on the few occasions she was allowed to speak.

Once Nailah’s started having visions, she lost the privilege of having a name. Tasya immediately switched to referring to her with insults, ranging from “thing” to “half-mad beast” to “disappointment” and the like. Nailah’s potential was mourned far more than her presence was tolerated. The rejection and denial carved a weeping hole in her heart, and she spent an incredible amount of effort trying to be good enough again for Tasya. It never was.

After her mother finally abandoned her, she wandered nameless through the wilds. She thought of herself as a wild, half-mad beast, fit only to scavenge the very fringes of society. Yet when she’d encounter a stranger in the woods and they’d ask her name she never knew how to respond. Should she admit to her brokenness? Tell them she was a monster? Someone better left forgotten? She settled on simply being called “wanderer” - it was the truth, if anything. A mask to hide how she saw herself. She quickly realized it could be used to set people’s expectations of her on her own terms.

Once the wanderer discovered she could manufacture a social mask, she took up the mantle of the mercenary. She kept to remote villages, appearing and disappearing as suddenly as the wind, often only noticed by news of some local threat being quelled. Few people recognized her, and fewer still heard her speak. She hid as much of herself as she could, staying hidden under a thick cloak of silence and only answered to her moniker. She thought nobody could reject her if she rejected herself first, but her relentless visions haunted her. She felt, through other’s hearts, the warmth of lovers greeting one another, the affection in well worn childhood nicknames, the joys of long lost friends reuniting. The aching loneliness she was so used to grew more overwhelming with every vision. Was this truly what she wanted? To be forgotten and alone? Who was she really, hiding under her mask? 

She wandered town after town, road after road, using her title as a statement of being. She was just a Mercenary. Little more than a weapon to be pointed at a problem. People were kept at an arms length distance with professional ease, and she could still be useful to those she came across. There was comfort for her in how simple it all seemed, though simplicity was a poor answer to her loneliness. Every solitary morning she drowned in silence, every new horizon was greyed by her sorrow. She stopped trying to answer the cloying doubts that clung to her, their despair staining her thoughts more than she could bear. Who was she, under everything? She gave herself one last chance - go to the closest city and try to find an answer - or fade away, lost and forgotten.

Ul’dah held much more than just an answer for her, though she didn’t know it at the time. The adventurer’s guild asked for a name - she told them Nailah. She couldn’t remember where she heard it. Familiar as it was, she refused to let anyone call her such. She was Mercenary. Adventurer. The name was a formality, nothing more. It wasn’t a mask she wanted to use. Much to her displeasure, the guild used her name frequently enough for it to become common knowledge among their clients.

When the Scions took notice of her abilities, she asked the same comfortable distance of them she was so used to. In response the Scions gave her their names - Thancred, Yda, Minfilia - and she couldn’t understand. Why tell a simple mercenary the names of Scions? Did she not deserve scorn for her visions? The visions have a name? Their responses were acceptance and support and Nailah could not understand. She called them by titles instead - Scholar, Scion, Antecedent - though her echo didn’t let her miss the disappointment they felt. She tightened her masks and hid behind a new one, one given by those who accepted the mercenary - the Warrior of Light. 

Tales of the Warrior triumphing over Titan and Garuda spread through Eorzea like wildfire. Her new allies respected the distance she desired, though they had the odd habit of confiding their worries to her. The Warrior supposed she made a good listener, quiet as she was. Would they listen to her? Should she risk that vulnerability? She didn’t know what answer she hoped for anymore. She didn’t know what she would say. She kept her silence.

Her mask started to chafe. Strangers made assumptions about who she was, remarking they expected her to be bigger or a man. Few expected her to be as quiet as she was. Fewer still, a mage. She felt choked by their expectations - who she was wasn’t what they seemed to want. The desire to abandon her masks and nascent bonds writhed inside her whenever she heard new voices. What more did she need to do? Was the Warrior not enough for them? Scions noticed her frustration, offering short words of encouragement. She did her best to listen.

Once the Ultima Weapon was destroyed, she took a look at herself. The Scions - Papalymo, Yda, Urianger -  stood by her every step they could. Did they not deserve to see who their Warrior was? One quiet morning, once everything was moved to Mor Dhona, The Warrior met Minfilia in her solar for possibly the most terrifying request of her life - she asked her first new friend to call her by name.

Nailah. 

As long as they were in the solar. Alone. Where nobody else could hear. 

It was a start, at least.

#its nailahposting hours #cw abuse #cw depression #just to be safe #for everything surrounding her mother is not healthy #nailah's got some rough mental health stuff goin on but i dont know how much i want to go into it >.> #mostly out of fear of missing a cw tag #sorry this is so long ;-; #cecil gets carried away talking about blorbos ;-; #idk im just fascinated by the concept of identity #if you can't tell i have a lot of fic ideas surrounding nailah's struggle with identity - every paragraph is a potentially different fic #i might expand on this even more (re: hw through ew identity thoughts) but she's through the worst of her issues by the end of arr #...i'm gonna tag this as a writing thing bc it gets kinda fic-y #cecil writes

[definitelynotshouting]

(Hunger au) I'm going into ecology and it's fascinating looking at your au's ecosystem, especially since this doesn't necessarily seem driven by natural selection and instead by just. The universe creating what it needs, with a purpose in mind. That's so different from our world that it's fascinating to think about the implications. Rather than existing to take advantage of and respond to resources and selective pressures, theyre basically creating said resources/pressures. The watchers are having to manually adapt to survive after a bottleneck effect, which to be fair even if there was natural selection they'd probably have to cuz adaptation takes a looong time in species with long reproductive cycles. Do they have a genome? Or are they just being arbiters of mutation themselves (by that i mean theres no genome so theyre changing their species themselves since theres nothing to mutate)? Do offspring inherit traits? What does this mean for natural selection (cuz like. If they survive differently depending on how their traits match up to the environment and selective pressures there is)? With the seekers gone are expected to have a population rebound barring any other selective pressures/fitness independent factors on their population? Their reproductive strategy seemingly aligns with the low pressure they're facing... I read a paper to understand this and it's really cool:

(From https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-019-42562-7)

They seem to be an r-selected species and invest a lot in their offspring, but they just naturally have low infant survival rates. This is the sort of species that does not do well in the long run so that adds urgency to their efforts to edit themselves.

All this to say that I'm rotating the concept of an ecological system that has one of ecology's core tenants (evolution) heavily altered/removed. Tis fascinating.

between you and chem anon im going to have a heart attack over sciency people looking at my silly au /lh

I really did want to go like vastly different from how our world works since this is such a video game setting-- it was really fun to noodle about what a universe made out of code instead of DNA would look like!!! and having the universe be quasi-sentient, affected by a form of evolution itself as well (thank you julien gough for the universe evolution theory that i have wholeheartedly adopted into my worldview).... idk its led to some very interesting worldbuilding for sure 😂😂😂

Watchers-- or any entity in this universe, actually-- dont really have a genome like we'd understand it. Instead, theyre made up of code and code blocks, which i guess would sorta mimic that to a certain degree, but its more tipped in favour of computer programming than biology. The whole au sorta just wholesale marries the two together, along with physics and chemistry (i am currently percolating on how crafting works in this au rn and my current idea involves the concept of the crafting table acting somewhat like a catalyst, which. okay dont take that as gospel yet i havent fully cooked on that one) etc etc etc.

But the Watchers did intentionally change their coding to help defend against the Seekers when they were being hunted into extinction!!! Watchers already had a natural affinity for deep coding, so while it took a lot of effort and caused a lot of damage to themselves, they managed to rapidly change their code structure (aka this universe's version of genetic makeup) to get better at, well. Watching. Seeing the Seekers coming far enough in advance to run before they got there became their primary defense against getting voraciously hunted, and by the end of it the Seekers starved out and went extinct bc they'd gotten so adept at avoiding them.

Offspring is interesting because in my mind at their base level (so genetically/code structurally speaking), Watchers are identical clones of each other. They reproduce asexually-- think uhhh mourning geckos and some species of aphids, which reproduce via parthenogenesis. So yes, in a sense they do inherit traits, but its in a direct line from the parent as a genetic copy. Their memory codes and surface code layers are what differentiate themselves from each other

Reading this chart is so interesting.... i'd say you're right in that Watchers would be considered an r-selected species!! I think if they werent like. Essentially made out of tissue paper thats constantly getting damaged and having to be repaired, they would be able to bounce back to the point of population rebound for sure. The problem with that though is there are only about 40 Watchers left-- thats how bad and out of control the situation got. And since they have such a long reproductive cycle, and such a high infant mortality rate, and their experiment with Grian went so wrong, AND the universe formed Listeners to replace them via direct competition (Watchers cant feed from Listener-infected Players!!), they are unfortunately headed right for extinction too.

Hopefully this makes a modicum of sense and isnt just me totally talking out of my ass wkdnjedjkejdke but i hope this answered most of your questions!!! Im really glad you like the direction ive taken this, its a lot of fun to conceptualize a world that works on different rules than our own :]

#shouting speaks #asks #hunger au #evo watchers #minecraft worldbuilding #mcyt #long post #i need u to understand how insanely intimidating it is to have ppl who actually study this stuff eyeballing it AKDNAKDJKSKS /LH #I NEVER WENT TO COLLEGE!!! IM OPERATING ON A HIGH SCHOOL LEVEL EDUCATION HERE!!!!! #i just also supplement it with a metric fuckton of research and bullying my brain into understanding hyperspecific terms #me reading these incredibly dry papers like i WILL force myself to get it. gun to my FUCKING head #😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 #txt

[raisinchallah]

ive thought a lot about like jewish fantasy and how to incorporate like fantastical and magical elements with like jewish characters because like obviously plenty of people have done that just fine with christian concepts but is there some kind of inherent block between jewish characters and idk weirder stuff i dont really know how you would fully tackle it but have pensively shoved around the idea of a jewish vampire story in my head for months like honestly even wondering if its like possible partially because of the complex interweaving of antisemitism and some portrayals of vampires and just any associations of jews and blood is somewhat fraught it feels both like a challenge but also something idk how it could be done but im curious and the dybbuk movie still has really stuck with me and i really would love to see more fascinating mixing of jews and horror and i do feel like the vampire as a concept would be cool to dig into with like how they can live so long feeling totally out of time and place and like going into ways jews have moved from place to place but carrying memories of old places and its like the sadness and loss like a vampire may go to an old place and it is different and time has passed them by but a jew who has lived for 400 years and its like their people arent even walking the same streets is like much to think about and questions of identity and like perhaps as a vampire choosing to both try to pass as human but also trying to remake an identity pretend to be not jewish at various points and like of course thinking of the dybbuk the figure of the bride fasting on her wedding day and like also how u know drinking blood can often be a big moral choice for a vampire but its like even more forbidden like by rules of kashrus and the weight of like history idk much to think about...

[archer3-13]

Early Concept Arts of Dimitri, Claude, Edelgard

Consider it an occupational interest of sorts, We dont have much in the way of early concept art for three houses unfortunately. Most of what i’ve seen released is more so late development and reference sheets on that front. For a while now however there have been some early looks into dimitri, claude, and edelgards character designs that i feel might be worth a quick glance at.

well start with dimitri since his is the least changed in comparison to the final product, though not without its interesting notes.

like i said, not too much is overall different. The cape and sword belt thing [dont remember the proper term] are identitcal, dimitris hair and face, and well the gauntlets look slightly different compared to the final release they are still there, though strangely without the leg armour which is instead normal boots in the garreg mach uniform style.

the most notable and obvious change is of course the lack of the upper body armour, followed by a change on the trimming of the outfit which is the standard gold as opposed to gunmetal grey/dark silver seen on the final outfit. in place of the upper body armour you’ll note that dimitris actually wearing a near identical uniform set up as the final version of school edelgard wears [namely the cravat and gold chain mind you] so perhaps those are suppose to be elements of a standard/baseline house leader uniform originally as opposed to edelgards unique flair? At least at some point during the development? Certainly these elements were either dimitris first before being moved onto edelgards design later, or were edelgards first and were attempted to be utilized in dimitris design as well before being scrapped from him and kept to edelgard. That certainly gives me the impression that this is a fairly late early design piece though as it were, considering how close it is to dimitris final school design. Something that can very much not be said for claude and edelgards early designs.

moving onto claudes

We see that either leicester was a lot different of a place in early development, or claude was a lot less subtle about his foreign origins. funnily enough, you can also see similar elements of a ‘standard house leader’ in this version of the uniform, the jacket being more in line with edelgards final jacket and dimitris early jacket and claudes even sporting a cravat like the other two. if his cape wasn’t covering the other side of his outfit i wouldn’t be surprised if the golden chain was there as well. speaking of that cape though its certainly very different compared to the final cape he wears. Not only is it drapped on the front on the opposite side of his final design, it has a series of black lines cutting into it. and as opposed to the longcoat design of his final uniform hes sporting a similar length shirt as other garreg mach uniforms [with the sleeves pulled up form the looks of it], a fabric belt, and even poofier pants [with golden embroidery on the sides which further give it a more foreigner vibe then his final outffit] then his final design along with shorter boots. on a smaller note youll also notice that hes missing his left ear earring, though otherwise his face and hairstyle are the same as the final version.

the keen eye of you will also notice that this early claude design actually shares quite a lot in common with another claude design. Namely, claudes post timeskip outfit. Cape draping over the front right side of the body, short coat and poofier pants, a cravat, and most importantly the belt which is near identical here to his post timeskip belt

its even worn in a very similar fashion. Why they would do this im not sure, claudes late inclusion in development perhaps pressing them to settle on reusing these elements as opposed to something more unique? Or did the design staff like these elements enough to continue them into clades post timeskip design? questions questions.

now onto edelgard, who i’ve held off for last because hers is by far the most radical departure of design, and she has a lot more content to go over

first to start off i’ll just quickly mention the elements that held over to her final design: white hair, ribbons, leggings, lavender eyes. Now that that’s out of the way... it really is quite the design shift isn’t it and kinda what i meant when asking which came first with the garreg mach ‘house leader uniform’ elements as it were. Was it dimitri, or was it edelgard? Regardless this certainly feels like to me the earliest design of the lot with edelgard sporting almost none of the garreg mach uniform elements [perhaps they were closer to this originally? perhaps edelgard wasn’t even a student initially?]. You’ll also notice that the reds on her outffit are much more subdued compared to the final outffit, a bit of purple splashed in as opposed to the pure red she sports in the final design. And as opposed to the shorts she wears in the final design, here shes sporting a dark blueish skirt along with a black... belt thing. 

additionally her house cape [lacking decoration but with some of it pulled over the front when it is there] colour is black as well indicating that yes the black eagles house colour was very much suppose to be black initially. Additionally the uniform itself well not having much in the way of parallels to the garreg mach uniform does invoke elements of 19th century military officer uniforms rather strongly, especially the two to the right which go all the way up the chest to the neckline belt thing. though maybe the original garreg mach uniforms were more to this style in general? Her own cravat is also in a much different style and black as opposed to white like dimitri and claudes early design cravats. additionally well we can’t see the rest of he legs its seems she was originally suppose to have much taller boots as well looking at the little bit of black we can see on her legs there. she does have a gold chain as well but its hooked under her right arm, and her sleeves like the gold cuff trimmings.

Youll also notice that shes got a much different hairstyle here, not only sporting some rather straightesh bangs and an alternating ribbon colour of lavender or red, consideration as to whether or not she should have a bit draping in the front, slight differences in the long side bits of her hair and even some consideration of if she should have hair buns or even short hair altogether [though her designs lean more towards long hair]. Either her hair was giving them a lot of trouble, or her early designs here are damn near the beginning which im inclined to believe. We even have a sheet dedicated to trying out different styles for her

the one they ultimantly landed on, minus the front sweeping hair, you can see in the bottom left. I kinda prefer the top left one myself though, though thats probably due to its similarities to saber from fate/stay’s hairstyle. The top left one reminds me a lot of lysithias hairstyle incidentally, which might possibly mean that lysithias character [atleast her look] sprang from unused edelgard concepts.

overall:

i prefer dimitris final design myself since it suits him and his story better, but its also so similar to his final design that i feel part of it might just be better familiarity with the final look. Either way it generally works.

Claudes early look i find fascinating in terms of how it seems to have carried over into his post timeskip look to some degree. in the end though i prefer his final look for what they eventually decided on with his character, someone sneaky whos hiding his cultural origins. The final design speaks more to a claude that much more open about those origins instead.

edelgards... im stuck on because her early design speaks to me of a much different game in terms of look and story, well her final design meshes better with even claude and dimitris early designs. However if i had to pick one i prefer from visual looks alone... i’d say edelgards early design with short hair [the one on the far right of her first picture essentially]. I like the implication of the uniforms in general looking closer to that obviously since im a sucker for that visual look [perhaps even have more individual flair to each countries school uniform including designs and colours], and a sucker for short hair in general, but i feel the militaristic aspects of the early design suit edelgard better and the shade of red more appealing in general here. Maybe blend this one and her final design to get the perfect edelgard outffit? idk.

#fire emblem #fe3h #fe16 #claude #dimitri #edelgard

[ithymedit]

night thinking is already making me think of things.

ive got a boner for self identity and that kinda shit right. but mostly because of clones and oh god i just realized why i am currently loving the ideas of clones. its because my brain is processing "what if im not special? that im just a copy of someone else?" and like wow. awesome thing going for you bud.

anyways i was about to ramble about a thing or somethings being a patchwork of various other things. but like, a person. i know, amazing right.

but idk why its fascinating me know the concept of the arc of "everything that youve ever experienced amounted into you in the present" but for a patchwork person. its bewildering and a bit cool.

what do these group of people, who have experienced so many things, become when they are combined and mixed together? which parts of their former selves stand out? can close friends and family recognize the patterns that were in them?

better yet, what if the two ingredients in that body are still alive and kicking? being compared to mixed and jumbled version? this is so cool im definitely gonna make something out of this

#sam talks #rambling #clones #patchwork inc

[solomonish]

oh please don't feel bad!!! (ŏ̥̥̥̥ A ŏ̥̥̥̥ ) I'm really happy to hear that you've been thriving in real life and enjoying recent interests tbh! I just wanted to make sure I hadn't pulled a serious stupid or worse, a serious stupid that had negative effects on you is all, and am really, really glad to read that no such thing has occurred. I also really appreciate the further explanation on everything, as it has definitely put some worries to rest regarding the ask itself {and also regarding the situation which led to the initial "hey please respect my boundaries" post to be honest. not gonna lie my first reaction to catching wind of the whole debacle was just instant (ง'̀-‘́)ง }. anywho! genshin sure is something huh? the multidimensional gameplay is really fascinating to toy with, and the animation style is also?? so pretty?? I die, tech is so cool sometimes. and the concepts! the concepts. the abyss alone is really intriguing, and I've gotta admit that I am really curious to see if any other goetic demons make their appearance as "archons" or the like later on. {ah yes, complexities on complexities on complexities and problems caused on purpose for exactly no reason at all. gnosticism at its finest}. personally my money's on signora herself having a secret identity to such effect too, and if such a theory is indulged by the devs, her connection to the fatui and also general disposition lends itself to belial being a strong contender. maaaybe also naberius given the whole "cryo = likely connected Khaenri'ah" thing that seems to be a trend, tho that one might be a bit niche for marketing purposes 🤔. oh! also! what's your favorite vision type/weapon class btw if you don't mind me asking? :D — Return of PB

Haha, well its all over now so no need to get upset about it. But thank u for double checking and im glad we could figure it out!!

Listen my friends pulled me in sometime in November I think? But I stopped playing for a few months because I couldn't play it on my phone or laptop but once they implemented cross save i FELL IN LOVE AGAIN!! And then today with the livestream -- I am in the group of people who were so excited to see a certain hat-having character again <3

Ahhh i gotta be honest I'm not too familiar with demons (despite my position in the obey me fandom lol) and don't have any theories regarding future names lol? But those are super interesting! I personally want more Scara screen time, not just because he's hot my favorite bastard but I also really, really wanna know what the fuck he meant at the end of Unreconciled Stars. My man's just said "the stars are a lie" "what?" "I don't have to explain myself to you" and then LEFT FOR ALMOST A YEAR. WILL WE EVER KNOW???? HELLO???

Obey Me is easy and fun to make theories off of because yes queen give us nothing 🤩 there's not a lot to go off of so I can just kinda go crazy? But with genshin there's a lot of established lore and its a lot for me to keep track of so I'm more of a theory listener than theory creator in that regard lol

Anyway! My fave element to play with is definitely anemo bc swirl reactions work with pretty much anything except geo. And I love polearms!! Very speedy and stronk. This works out because I'm a Xiao main LOL

Although Amber is the best girl and I'm going to build tf out of her at some point. She's gonna be so fuckin buff. Idk how but she will be. God I love her so much.

#asked and answered #genshin #<- blacklist if u dont wanna hear me talk about genshin lol #pubonic blague anon #long post

[razielxiii]

I need to vent about something personal and this is basically the only place where im pretty much invisible since tumblrs dead and barely any IRL friends follow me here.

I think i have osdd-1a

Ive always always ALWAYS since ealry childhood had issues with my identity. Wether its my physical identity or like "who" i am as a person or who i want to be. Ive had years and years of dissociative symptoms. Some extreme and some mild. And im prone to mood swings. And when i was a kid my family would get scared and call me possessed. Ive felt an uncontrollable urge to do certain things i didnt intend to do in at least three incidents that i can remember, where i couldnt control my body or words. And in two of those instances i felt like i wasnt myself anymore but someone else entirely. Theres voices sometimes, but they're my voice, just intrusive. Theres other stuff too but i just thought this was all me. Like thats just my weird depressive symptoms and i just had a very long term fascination with the concept of identity. But it just feels like it cant be a coincidence.

On the flip side i feel like im completely making it all up. Like its near impossible. I dont have enough trauma or i dont have enough symptoms. I havent really met any "alters" so they cant be real. Etc. I still kinda am convinced im just making this up for...attention? Pity? Idk.

And i think its osdd1a and not 1b or DID bc well i havent really met any alters so i dont know if theyre distinct from me. And i havent switched that i know of, so theres amnesia (if i do have this disorder). That rules out DID and 1b.

But theres so little out there on the internet about 1a bc its so rare and if u do have it its so subtle and hard to diagnose. So i cant really compare experiences or validate my worries? Idk. I still feel like im making it up. Im scared to go to my therapist about this. What if she just dismisses it? What if she can prove im faking? What is she can prove its real? Each scenario is so scary for different reasons. Idk. If anyones reading this, any advice?

#osdd #osdd1a #osdd1b #did #dissociation

[normal-thoughts-official]

Do you have any hcs for Magnus taking ppl to pride for the first time? I kinda feel like he’d act as a guide for others, making sure everyone feels safe and happy during their first time. Like, I can picture him bringing daylighter Raphael out for the first time, showing Meliorn around (bc even though they’ve been around for a while, the Seelies don’t really do human stuff) and holding Alec’s hand while he looks around in amazement.

well surprise surprise this got very long. bet y’all never saw that coming

ok so i particularly love this ask because like, the idea of meliorn going to pride for the first time is a riot and i adore it

like seelie society has developed completely independently from mundane society in every way, hell, it existed before humans did. so there's absolutely no reason whatsoever to believe that their culture even has the concepts of gender of sexuality, and believing that it would be the same as modern western ones is just straight up anachronistic tbh

so like personally i hc that seelie society has no gender (and therefore no concept of sexuality in the way that we see it), so the idea of pride- doesn't even make sense to them, cuz there's no concept of these identities, much less a history of oppression that would bring forward the need to celebrate their resistance like there currently is

so meliorn would want to go just to like, see what that's like and what's it all about. and the whole time they're just following Magnus around and like, taking notes. hm, interesting, what is this trans thing again? ah yes, people who dont think their personality matches the one mundanes believe would be brought by their genitals. hm. fascinating. and Magnus is just like, laughing loudly and it's the best pride he's ever been to, because he knows how ridiculous queerphobia and cishetnormativity are, but meliorn can make that so clear in their words in a way thats just, like, fantastic to hear, you know? and they dont even mean to, but it's great all the same

plus meliorn actually does feel good because a lot of people look at them and smile broadly or even wave, especially younger people who are just like, in awe of them and Magnus, who are so unapologetically gnc and indisputably beautiful, and looking at them is just like, inspiring, you know? and Meliorn has never felt this admired and appreciated and they dont even fully understand why, they're just walking around in their usual clothing and leaf makeup and everyone is just like, in love with them. and it's nice. they can tell there's an edge of sadness to the whole thing, like how their normal everyday existence seems to be so shocking and refreshing for these people, but mostly they feel good about it

later they bring their findings to the other seelies - you know, the ones who dont usually leave the realm and are way less familiar with mundane culture(s) than they are - and the others are like. shut up. there's no way this is real. the shape of their genital defines what wavelength they are supposed to find appealing? this makes no sense. and meliorn's like "idk what to tell u buddy i literally physically can't lie" and they're like surely this is an elaborate prank

but anyway it's fun and nice and they enjoy it greatly and ask Magnus a lot of questions, and Magnus loves going with them more than anyone else because its just so fun and the way this is completely unnatural to them feels refreshing - Magnus doesnt have to explain why he feels the way he feels, for once, but rather he has to explain why people dont get that, and thats a good change tbh

okay onto other ppl im sorry for this tangent djdndjdndk RAPHAEL YES. god i just. okay i love the mental image of Magnus taking Raphael to pride aaaaaaaa

like okay first of all so many layeRS to make this emotional, okay. the fact that he's now a daylighter and can enjoy being out in the sun, the fact that this is a bright costumed parade and it kinda reminds him of the día de los muertos parade and makes him feel at home, the fact that he gets to celebrate and meet other ace ppl - just, so many good things going on here dundidmdi

and Raphael was kinda unsure about going because 1- pride can get pretty sexual at times, and while he gets it and doesn't mind other people's business, he doesn't want to be hit on or participate in that; 2- big crowd makes senses go craycray and it can get very overwhelming and he's scared of overload, plus it's just not his scene in general with huge parties and such. but a part of him does want to go and he's torn, so of course Magnus is immediately like "oh dear, don't worry, i can take you, i'll make sure it's good" and Raphael is like okay

so Magnus takes him and it's :') nice, because as always he’s just so attentive. disclosure i’ve only ever been to the São Paulo pride so i’m gonna go with how it works in here but im assuming it’s not that different in like, other places. also São Paulo currently has the biggest pride parade in the world along with NYC so you know, i think it’s influential at the very least

anyway so he finds a section that’s led by ace pride groups, one that’s considerably small (in number of ppl) and spacious, and it’s. nice. very nice. magnus makes it a point to paint the ace pride colors on raphael’s face (we deserve raphael in makeup tbh) and raphael is all like “it’s fine, it’s not like i’ll want to draw a lot of attention” (like he isn’t wearing the ace flag colors already) and magnus is like hush, let me have this, i want my boy to have a good pride experience. so raphael lets him and hides his smile and lets him, and it’s. cute okay

also idk why but i have the mental image of raphael seeing some other latino guy with some sign like. “i’m not your fetish” or something of the sort, and kind of tearing up because his whole life he’s been seen as this kind of sexual fantasy that couldn’t not be about sex, much less not be interested in it, and he feels seen. and it’s nice, okay

and as promised it’s not too overwhelming in matters of like people, tactile issues and such (there’s little magnus can do about the noise other than spell raphael to decrease his sensitivity so he doesn’t get overwhelmed, which is not ideal because it makes communication a bit harder between them, but he does it anyway if raphael asks him to), and if raphael gets tired, they can always turn into a corner and take a portal back home and cuddle the post-crowd jitteriness away. so it’s a success. and raphael hugs magnus later and thanks him and says that it was so great, that he’s missed this, the energy and the colors and the sun, and he never thought he’d get to have it again, and he did thanks to magnus. and magnus hugs him back and tells him “anything for you, my boy,” and it’s the sweetest thing okay im emo

also okay this still falls under Raphael and Meliorn but the POLYCULE okay, or at least saiaphaeliorn. like sign me the fuck up for the 4 of them together at pride, meliorn and magnus helping make some cute pride-themed makeup on the other 3, just aaaaaaaaa. maia looking absolutely gorgeous with her face framed in the bright bi colors, maybe a sunny dress with the trans flag colors? just because i think she’d look so cute in like, a mostly white dress with baby pink and blue details, okay. simon just paints the pan flag on his cheek but it’s still vibrant and cute and it suits him. and ghhghghghg meliorn delicately painting raphael’s face with colorful glitter..... effervescent, okay. just beautiful

and they get to hold hands in public and laugh and crack jokes and simon loves the music and the festival and raphael smiles fondly at him and maia singing along (him and meliorn definitely don’t know what the fuck they’re singing, but it’s okay because they’re clearly happy and that makes the two of them happy too) and just duahsdiahdaiuha soft okay. also they all get to experience meliorn’s takes on the whole thing and it’s fantastic and as usual meliorn gets raphael to laugh until he almost cries, and simon smiles brightly at the sight and gives meliorn a peck for their efforts, and just aaaaaaaa

in short they’re SOFT and i’m SOFT. and look yes i know that usually parades esp big ones are super crowded (lord knows the SP pride parade is an experience) but if in SP with 5 million ppl parading i could find sections with less people where you had enough space to walk holding hands and hear each other and not be overwhelmed, then i’m sure they can too, especially with magic and powers at their disposal. so i’m going to have this

also like. as much fun as this is for magnus (and it definitely is, it’s very nice to get to enjoy to be himself openly, and to bring kids there for their first time, and you know), it’s also bittersweet because like. he was there at stonewall, he was there for the first pride, you know? and apart from the obvious part where he lost so many friends who were there, there’s just. the very bad memories of the riots, because as important as they are and as much as he obviously doesn’t regret them, riots are hard, they are the language of the oppressed. he’s had to magically protect people from being shot by the police, he’s had to withstand trial by the Clave for using magic to shield the people from the tear gas and risking being seen, he’s had to save a lot of lives and he’s failed at it sometimes, too (i’ll always hc that he’s the reason neither Marsha nor Sylvia died during the riots and you can pry that away from my cold, dead hands). and he’s also seen it be whitewashed and lose some of its resistance and meaning, he’s seen Sylvia be booed at a later march when she spoke against imprisonment, and he’s seen so much be lost

and in that sense going to pride with alec later on might be his favorite, because it’s not like, a first time where he’s trying to get everyone to have the most fun they can and shit, you know? plus alec loves watching more than he does participating, he feels way too exposed in the crowded streets with so many openings and whatnot. but watching from a rooftop, where he has the best view, can still hear the sounds and enjoy the colors and the beauty of it from a distance? that’s perfect for him, and it’s a different experience

and magnus sits by his side as they watch, hand in hand, and reminisces about everything that he’s experienced after so many years, all the changes he’s seen, how he feels pride but he also feels loss and he feels old, and he fears what happens if pride’s history is forgotten, you know? and alec listens to him, listens to his version of this story, playing with magnus’ fingers and just enjoying the sound of his voice and the sight. and it’s nice. alec is always super attentive and enjoys hearing him talk and magnus can get lost in his memories unapologetically, you know? and it’s good

but that’s later on, of course, when they’ve already attended plenty together. for alec’s first pride he probably wants it to be like, perfect, so much so that alec has to tell him to slow down again, because of course magnus wants alec to have The Full Pride Experience, but alec would rather soak it up slowly than participate in a lot of stuff, anyway. magnus paints the rainbow flag on his cheek (one of the only occasions alec lets magnus put glitter on him, then promptly complains for the next three months because i swear that stuff is still on my skin, magnus, the other day i found some on my shoes! and magnus laughs at his antics as always and alec is forced to laugh too and can’t even be mad) and they kind of stay more by the end, and alec is kind of smiling in disbelief to himself the whole time as he watches all the colors and the unapologetic way people express their pride, and magnus can’t stop looking at him and grinning, too. and they walk hand in hand and it’s cute

(later, magnus says, see, mundane culture isn’t so bad, is it? and alec looks at him with a way more serious look, full of joy and happiness, and says, no, it isn’t. and kisses him and thanks him for everything, and it’s sweet)

also I'm soft thinking about Magnus reminiscing about planning the first pride along with "his dear friend Brenda" to Alec and/or Raphael, them putting their arms around his shoulder as he tells them the softer stories, too, the good things they did

small bonus: Magnus plays 2 truths and a lie with Simon regarding his memories of past prides, and Simon gets it wrong every time and is all wide eyed by the end, which makes both Magnus and Raphael laugh :)

#ask #anonymous #sh #shadowhunters #magnus bane #malec #The Polycule™ #saiaphaeliorn #simon lewis #maia roberts #raphael santiago #meliorn #alec lightwood #brotp: i'll do whatever it takes to protect them

[phoenixfangs]

okay this post got a little out of hand so its going under a readmore, im rambling abt irredeemable media and purity culture and the critical culture on tumblr and how it jazzes me up and infuriates me at the same time. i mention killing stalking specifically so if u dont wanna see that go ahead and skip this one

ive been a little fascinated by the concept of "irredeemable media" lately and like. i think we as a community on tumblr r trying so hard to compartmentalize media into only two boxes: problematic and unproblematic. and i think thats A Little idiotic LMAO

oftentimes were not even digging into the material we just See smthn like a distasteful trope or a -phobia or -ism Somewhere in the material and brand it problematic, and leave it at that. most "critics" (i hesitate to call them that but i dont have a better word) on this site dont even watch or read the thing theyre talking abt -- its valid to not Want to read smthn like killing stalking but at the same time how many ppl decrying it as The Worst Possible Thing have read even a chapter of it? my guess is very few

(this is NOT an endorsement of killing stalking btw, this is what started my fascination with "irredeemable media" so i am currently reading it to see if it rlly is that bad, and like. yeah its p god awful LMAO i cant in good conscience even recommend it for others to review/critique it its so vile. i want to make it abundantly clear that i am NOT reading it to enjoy it, i am NOT enjoying it in really any way while i am reading it, i think its disgusting in the way it depicts homosexuality, abuse/sexual assault and the way it treats women as a whole. i just wanted to read it bc now i have proof to back up any points i happen to make abt it being a disgusting story, bc im the type of person that wants to experience the Thing b4 i give genuine criticism of it)

ANYWAY killing stalking is maybe not the best example of my point bc even if u havent read it its not hard to accurately criticize it bc it rlly is Just That Awful but its what i brought up bc its what im investigating rn (i dont even wanna call it 'reading' bc thats embarrassing that im reading it LOL im investigating im doing research on killing stalking this is a scientific venture of mine), but like ill see smthn labelled as "irredeemable media" and i think "hm. has this person ever engaged with the material? how do they know its irredeemable? did they actually read/watch/whatever or did they see a lot of ppl talking abt it on tumblr?"

and like i said, i have no problems w anyone who looks at smthn labelled "irredeemable" and decides they dont want to engage w it, i couldnt give less of a shit what other ppl do with their time at this point in my life, i just think the critical culture on tumblr makes it maybe not the best place to get accurate, authentic criticism of things that have problematic elements (or anything rlly, the critical thinking skills on tumblr r subpar at best even when it comes to "good" or "acceptable" media)

and anyway im more fascinated w the culture of engaging w "irredeemable media": if u consume X media that is bad then, by the transitive property, u r bad. THAT is what fascinates and infuriates me abt the critical culture on tumblr. am i a bad person now bc im reading an Objectively Problematic comic as research, even tho literally nothing else abt my behavior/thoughts/morals has changed besides the mere existance of this comic in my life? will i be viewed as a dangerous person bc im reading an Objectively Problematic comic even though im actively decrying it and authentically telling u how bad it is and how much i dislike it and dont want others to read it because its so bad?

bc its not just media we try to box up into "problematic" and "unproblematic", its consumers too. for some reason when it comes to things deemed "irredeemable", if ANYONE engages with the source material, they r suddenly branded as "irredeemable" too, and any nuance of the situation is sucked out into the vacuous wasteland of media criticism on this website. obviously i think it goes without saying that bad media attracts bad ppl but at the same time, we make that assumption abt EVERY consumer of bad media, and i think thats unfair and narrow minded, esp through the lens of criticism

ppl want a moral high ground so badly, they want to feel superior to others so badly, that they jump at the opportunity to call someone an X apologist bc they consumed a media one time. purity culture on this website makes media criticism so difficult and toxic and its. ITS INTERESTING. ITS FRUSTRATING. I LOVE AND I HATE IT. i want to study some of u ppl like animals, the way u react when u hear someone watched hetalia one time or read homestuck one time or laughed at family guy one time. if i had the time i would Genuinely write a think piece on this phenomenon bc its so fascinating to see ppl playing into this purity culture and trying to one up each other by saying "well i NEVER watched this or read that so im morally superior to this other person who did"

i guess my point is, purity culture goes beyond just wanting pure, wholesome media with no flaws and no problematic elements (which is impossible btw bc everybodys standards r different) for the sake of. idk -- ppl like that would claim its to create a positive non-toxic space for folks in margianalized identity groups or smthn probably but idk if i buy that from ppl who behave in such a self righteous, self fellating sort of way -- but that demand for purity extends to consumers of problematic media as well and, who is it passing judgement on those ppl from on high, like a god? the same idiots sitting at their computers reblogging "x my beloved" gifs, same as anyone else

i guess what im actually saying is that NOBODY on this website has any right to pass such harsh judgement on anyone else, nobody anywhere has the right to feel superior to anyone else just bc they only watch pure childrens cartoons and not terrible problematic things like game of thrones or whatever

#mine #if u read this mess then thank u #if u wanna argue abt any of it with me please send me messages to argue abt it #ive been writing this thing for nearly 2 hours now im avoiding work pls argue w me abt the value of a comic like killing stalking #and if it even has any value

[agent-cupcake]

Hey! love your writing. Just finished going through your posts on chrollo and some of the PT. The soulmate au really got me. How does that relationship end? Both the protag and chrollo are exact opposites in what they value but I guess their 'drive' for it are similar in strength. Chrollo very intent on breaking ties that bind people, especially life. While protag is very protective of her ties as well as the ties of others. They're so horribly fated for each other.

(previous anon who sent ask on previous chrollo au) Sorry for sending that ask! The rules pages didnt load for me so I didn't see your lack of desire for hxh asks until I got home. But your writing is still amazing to read, since it evoked such feelings and scenarios in my mind as basis for those feelings the characters had. Again im sorry! But i'm glad I found your work through those hxh asks. Im looking forward to reading your current content and see what you're into now!

Hey no worries! I don’t mind at all being asked about HxH with asks like this, I think it’s mainly just a matter of feeling respected that makes me upset when people barge in with “leorio being rough with his so XD” like damn idk that lowkey hurts my feelings, SO just the fact that you read the rules at all is really nice and makes me happy. (Also, does this mean that page isn’t working on mobile?) 

To answer your question... Well, I guess I don’t have an answer? I suppose I wrote myself into a corner on that one, which happens pretty often. I like to write singular stories without any future or furthering of the story in mind, the scenarios are meant to exist as they are. In that regard, your thoughts or ideas about what comes next are as valid as mine. Still, the dynamic is fascinating to me even now, I know why I wanted to write about their opposite views on love/life, but also consider the ways they’re similar in representing such extreme opposites of belief. It would never work long term. I can’t see Chrollo accepting that a person who has ideals like she has (or, honestly, anybody) would be his other half, but his obsession with trying to understand why would eat at him relentlessly. He’d constantly push for the reader to understand and take on his line of thinking while being intrigued, annoyed, and maybe even charmed/amused by the fact that she wouldn’t bend to his logic. The more she stuck to her hopeless romanticism, the more fixated Chrollo would feel in his dissatisfaction about why she was his soulmate. Reader’s views, in turn, would push her to endure his treatment and even antagonize him by questioning Chrollo. Her behavior would mimic his in how she’d try to convince Chrollo of her beliefs and search for her own understanding of why fate would do such a thing to her. Probably a bit of a Floria Tosca ‘why would the Madonna put me through this?!’ sort of complex. They both rely on fate so heavily as an absolute, something that can be trusted, that this betrayal of fate would force some fairly heavy critical thinking and doubt.  With neither being fundamentally able to bend, other than reader becoming so mentally broken that she’s no longer capable of holding her ideals, I suppose Chrollo would eventually just have to entirely mentally disassociate from her and move on for the sake of something like self preservation? Unless he was capable of undergoing some pretty dramatic self actualization and therapy, they couldn’t stay together without something going all cracked.

An interesting idea to consider about such broken / unstable people having soulmates is that the concept of being made ‘whole’ by your ‘other half’ cannot compensate for the pieces of self that are already missing or damaged past the point of repair within the individual. Chrollo’s only real soulmate is the spider itself, but that doesn’t make for very interesting reader insert. The next best thing, then, is for his ‘other half’ to be his personal antagonist, as they’d represent an identity he simply lacks or has abandoned and thus does not want... But that just goes right back to the original flaw and the fact that this relationship, by its very nature, cannot be resolved. 

I’m not sure if you’ll be interested in what I’ve been posting recently, but thank you for reading my stuff! Even if I get cranky about my HxH days sometimes, I do appreciate that very much!

#chrollo lucilfer #chrollo #hunter x hunter #it's six thirty am i haven't slept sorry if this reads like a jumbled mess

[yeoldontknow]

Hi! Can I ask question about the movie Paris Texas? I am not sure if youre the right personbut i have always wondered why it is so highly revered. Like I liked the movie, i thought it was good. i could feel the longing the characters are going through, i liked how it was shot(?),i can see why the 'booth' scenes are always replicated in music vids & other shows & stuffBut idk what makes it iconic- like everytime i listen to people talk about films, they bring that movie up.

my favorite actors and directors for around the world even mention that filmLike i enjoyed it and know its good, but i am not sure on what makes it great. what are your thoughts on this film?

ahh hello! lmao im so happy people are asking me to talk about film lmao this really does excite me. and im so glad you came to me with this! just in general! thank you!

trust me like...i get it. paris texas is a great film, and i did enjoy watching it, but i see where you come from. i can understand why its been so revered, so hopefully i can shed some light on that for you. but! i really do understand where you come from. if im honest, theres a lot of flaws and issues with the film. its slow, doesnt actually handle the heavy themes the script attempts to portray very well, and doesnt really actually offer any nuance to janes character. shes actually a really complex character, but shes boxed into the role of like...the manic pixie dream girl, except not that. shes not and ideology of freedom or growth or perfection the way that trope is usually portrayed. instead she exists to further a male centric narrative and the depiction of women is really shallow, so trust me i get why there is a dissenting opinion. 

that said, there are a lot of things that make the film as cult and important as its become among cinephiles. they range from the use of americana as a plot device, colour theory, voyeurism, the breakdown of the american dream, etc. ill be breaking down some of the major points here under the cut, but there are even more ways to read this. and!! i stress!! it is ok to read all of this and still disagree! thats the beauty of film studies.

to really understand fundamentally why this film is so important we need to focus on two intertwining notions - that the film is a portrayal of america and this portrayal of a america is coming from a foreigner. the director of the film is win wenders, a german filmmaker, who has always claimed to be fascinated by the history and character of america. effectively, america itself becomes a character within the film. it does not matter that ‘america’ is the backdrop - it plays such an integral role in shaping the narrative of the story, one could argue it has more autonomy than jane. take for example the opening scene - it opens with the scene of a man walking aimlessly through the desert with a gallon of water - nameless and aimless. from this very first moment, we are presented with land. an endless expanses of land in which there is no real ownership; from this moment, we are meant to understand this america shapes the lives of its people as much as this perspective on america is shaped by the director of the film. 

furthermore, if we consider the opening shot; the saloon; the fact that a full 26 minutes elapses before the main character says a single word, we can argue the mise en scene within each of these scenes a visual alignment to the classic genre of western cinema. here, too, in this genre is the stress on land as it relates to and symbolizes the importance of freedom, autonomy, and identity, but moreover is there a stress on the notion of the anti-hero. by cultivating this understanding of america and the western, we can immediately align travis with the failed man, the failed husband, a failed owner of land, and a failed dream. 

but...did he fail? or did the notion of americana and the american dream fail him, instead? this seems to be the case as we considered the continual use of americana references. one of the fundamental aspects of americana is the nature of nostalgia - americana is traditionally idealized as the desire to return to small towns and cities from the turn of the century. the hope of creating a home, only for that essence of home to be lost; the period of exploration from 1820 to 1880, and then the comfort of being settled from 1880 to WWII. these are the fundamental aspects to understanding americana but they are foundational in the nostalgia that drives the narrative. aspects like: a barber shop, a diner, route-66, etc these small town notions are the driving pieces of nostalgia. and these are the elements of nostalgia that generate the plot device of paris texas.

im taking a moment here to really stress the following: western films and the concept of americana is inherently problematic. it exists on wester colonization, appropriation, and genocide. americana is a white-washed version of history and that, explicitly, is why all the elements of americana, nostalgia, and the american dream fail within this film because, again, it is america from the perspective of a foreigner and the perspective is profoundly unforgiving. 

(also, like, i literally hate western films because they are so racist and sexist and hyper-masculine, from any historical or modern perspective, so again...me being me saying i understand why you might have had a hard time with this movie lmao but when you realize this is not speaking in favor of those things it kind of hits you like...oh, damn. like, imagine this film from the perspective of a white american male, you know? travis would be a king, someone admired rather than someone youre not even sure you like or tolerate by the end)

right! so! now that we understand how important the elements of a failed america and american dream are to this film, we can see how nostalgia continually presents itself - not for a home lost, but for the hope and the opportunity lost. consider: the colour, the wide, open expanses of land (could have been owned, but are entirely empty), the way characters gaze at their own reflections - hell, the conversation between jane and travis at the end, double sided mirrors, jane forced to look at herself in the mirror while travis looks at nothing because its his memories and his memories are presented at a visual and emotional distance. memory presents itself through illusions, reflections, and disorganized narrative structures - it is not that they cant remember, but that they want to remember without criticism. this comes to a head when they view the home movies, another example of how life was or could have been - how it was supposed to be, and the sudden confrontation that it very much is not that. 

primarily for me, the thing that makes me enjoy the film (apart from realizing wenders has an extremely unforgiving view of america) was the colour theory. you cannot talk about this film without discussing the colour. the predominant tones in the film are red, white, and blue - americana and american flag. but why all the green (i.e the doctors office)? why the isolated events of solid red (i.e the strip club)? well, green and red are put perpetually at odds with one another. green, a usually soothing colour, is subverted to denote internal conflict; red, becomes regret, falsehoods. the colours in the film exist to at a sub-textual layer that speaks for the characters when they refuse to speak for themselves. and by the end, the colours return to a normal palette. black, beige, tan - travis recounting their history to jane in a room that is natural. things are finally exactly as they are meant to be, the intense colours of their emotions faded by distance and time, and forced now to confront their truth. 

but still...the elements of voyuerism exist. because he can see her...if he chose to. she cannot see him. she can only see herself. and so we are left, then, understanding that there is no hope. no connection. the achievement of the american dream is a falsehood of nostalgia that exists to drive our motivations, forcing us to live in a time or a place or a hope that never once was tangible, but craved just the same.

#i hope this helps you understand WHY its considered incredible #but remember theres a large number of films #EVERYONE obsesses over that i personally despise #this is just why #doesnt have to be right for you tho! #the joy of film #and any practice really #is the ability to praise a film you love and ensure it gets a place in history #if its great to you then it is great <3 #ahgishaman

[anotherler]

Ask Meme Part 2: LQ-ler

My faviest fave who I ever faved!! Low Quality Once-ler! Lets do this.

Why I like them: More like, why I LOVE them okay? Uh…where do I begin. I think his initial and prevailing appeal was his aesthetic. I love old technology, low quality footage, foggy audio and static. I love the sound of a VCR’s mechanics turning. And the reason for all of this is suitingly, nostalgia. Which is what LQ is all about. He’s so carefully thought up and his themes fit together so nicely. His concept had me hooked from the start; a Once-ler who comes from lowquality footage of the movie. But then it just gets even deeper and examines the regrets of a Once-ler and a character that knew about his fate and destiny from the start and it’s just so fucking fascinating and well thought out. LQ himself has this charm to his personality and he’s positively endearing and adorable it’s not hard to understand why so many people flocked to him and showed him love. But if he was just that and that alone it would make for a flat character. LQ has other sides to himself that come out from time to time and it becomes obvious that in some cases he’s putting up a façade. He tends to brush the fact that he’s upset or angry under the rug to keep up his image and it’s something that anyone reading can really understand. It’s a great study of identity and how adults present themselves to each other in the business world and just generally to the public and how sometimes we aren’t really true to ourselves because we don’t like things about ourselves. I know this got super analytical so im going to go back to his characterization for a sec. He is such a lively person. Each gesture and reply and his eccentricity are wonderful to witness. I love his design a LOT. Those big grey-blue eyes with the long lashes and his glasses and his messy brown hair. He has a really unique look to him. He’s a good guy and I’d love to talk with him about old tech and stuff. He comes off as caring a lot about other people and Im sure he wants the best for others.

     Why I don’t: He has made some really dumb mistakes and been so self destructive that he has impacted those around him. He needs to practice true self love beyond any sort of merits he has and just believe that he can do good things even if he’s done bad things in the past. He’s really REALLY got to stop beating himself up. It’s okay for him to make mistakes in the past but he’s got to seek improvement and any time that he does you can feel really happy for him. He’s come a long way but he’s got some ways to go and can’t give up just yet.

Favorite episode (scene if movie): Probably when HQ first showed up. That whole part had me screaming. Actually, I have a LOT of favorite scenes and chapters from his blog. Type louder and his drawing party are some old favorites. The buildup to the GRAND reveal and LQ’s valley times are also incredibly great and Swone’s visit was hilarious and sweet. I also love the more recent chapters where LQ continues to have conflict with HQ and we some other sides of him.

Favorite season/movie: Ahhh…it’s hard to pick one. I love his entire blog :” ) I already talked about a lot of stuff it’s hard sjkgslsddsh I’d just sit here and list everything LOL but if I had to pick one both the events leading up to the GRAND REVEAL and HQ showing up.

Favorite line(s): “Even though the tag might say “low-quality”, I think that those old gifs had their own charm to them. Nostalgia, if you will. “ “Honesty is the best policy, after all.” “I AM N-NOT A BUTT P-PERVERT!!!!!!!!!!!”

Favorite outfit: I’m honestly a sucker for his business suit and bandaged arms(though, poor LQ for being so badly injured). I also really love his thneed and that REDICULOUS cape he had from his business times.

OTP: LQxHQ. Gotta have that self love, amiright? It’s a really good exploration of LQ’s relationship with himself and HQ is frankly hilarious. I know it isn’t the healthiest for LQ but im hoping things can improve for him in the future. Also, Bawstin-luh or Brandon O’ Shea from the the Thneedville High AU because LQ and Brandon are just really happy together :” ) Brotp: LQ and Swone. And my guilty pleasure: LQ and Swone and Onag. I always did want to see those two meet. Also LQ and Thneednight, LQ and Corv and LQ and Winter when they finally work things out a bit heh. While we’re on the topic of folks I wish LQ could have met I just gotta say…Cheap. Thrift buddies. Just picture it. Cheap had a chance to meet LQ by punching him in the face for 10 whole dollars but he PASSED IT UP!! For SHAME, Cheap. (To be fair IDK if they’d get along well haha)

Head Canon: At one point in the blog it’s mentioned that LQ used to watch the 1972 TV special and he said his Mom caught him watching it and turned it off. I think that she turned it off during the Once-ler’s successful points and before he chopped the last tree. Since then, LQ has never watched past that point on the VHS tape and in his youth it gave him only positive ideas about being a Once-ler and impacted him a lot in the long run. It’s kind of ironic because his Mom tried to discourage him but only really made him more interested.

Unpopular opinion: Y’all probably don’t want to face this fact, but LQ can be really nasty and temperamental sometimes. He’s spoken outright insults at people when he’s speaking honestly so he’s not purely “an innocent and sweet uwu baby” . He’s also very introspective and intelligent though he’s made a number of stupid descisions. Some things he’s said and thought are downright philosophical. That being said, those aspects make me like him even more as a character.

A wish: I want to see LQ continue to improve and move on in his life. He might need to break the mold he’s in to make that happen but he’s already established that he’s been doing things his own way so it’s not hard to imagine. It’s hard to move on but I believe in him.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I don’t want LQ to die or give up :” )

5 words to best describe them: Nostalgic, Mysterious, Adorable, Charming, Bright

My nickname for them: I love the nickname ‘Lowqual’. It’s not a nickname I coined but…yeah. Uhm…Staticky Boi, My Favorite Onceler,

@residentcryptid And now onto Cheap!

#LQler