#if matt can be friends with one punisher then he can be friends with two punishers

[pearodice]

tristamp wolfwood as that one panel of matt murdock 😈

#dice draws #trigun #trigun stampede #trigun wolfwood #nicholas d. wolfwood #wolfwood #daredevil #matt murdock #id like to think that wolfwood and matt would be good friends #if matt can be friends with one punisher then he can be friends with two punishers

[struniolos]

guitar lessons.

chapter one; does he take care of you?

(you can read chapter two here!)

synopsis: you decided to take guitar lessons from your boyfriend nate’s best friend, chris, while he’s away at college. but one night, things go too far. loosely based off the song sex by the 1975.

warnings: suggestive, heavy petting.

what the fuck where you doing.

the freezing winter breeze hit the back of your neck and tips of your ears, as you knocked your heavy boots onto the porch to rid of the snow caked beneath them. it was late, the dim porch light and streetlights your only source of illumination. winters in boston were relentless, and besides the fact you had lived there your entire life, you’d never be used to it’s cold bite. it was almost as if mother nature was punishing you, and well, it was pretty justified.

you had found yourself on a familiar doorstep, one you’d been to many times, but usually with your boyfriend nate at your hip- your safety net. chris, nick and matt had been friends with nate for years and you had known the boys since highschool. you’d consider them friends, but not really your friends. they were kind, but you’d much rather hang out with your own friends. the only reason you were usually dragged along was because it was some of the only times you could be with nate. now that he was in college, an hour drive away, things had become incredibly hard between you.

it was only a passing comment you made, last week, that had gotten you into this. a regular night of driving around aimlessly with nate, the boys, and you had mentioned how you wanted to learn guitar. of course, chris had piped up to say he’d teach you, and stupidly you agreed. it god, what would nate do if he knew you were here? what was wrong with you? it was 8pm on a tuesday, you should be in bed.

you rap your knuckles on the christmas wreathe adorned door, and step back to quickly hugging your hands around yourself, your shaky breath coming out as soft puffs of smoke. the door cracked open slowly, revealing chris in a black hoodie with words you couldn’t read scribed onto it, grey sweatpants and clunky brown ugg boots.

“you made it.” he smiled, running a hand through his floppy hair.

“i did.” you smiled back, as he opened the door wider to let you in.

you knocked your boots a few more times at the door before kicking them off.

“you look great.” chris commented, seemingly just being polite.

you smiled back awkwardly, shuffling your socks on the floorboards. “oh, thanks.”

“fuck, it’s cold out there isn’t it?” he commented, as he began to walk you down the hallway. it was adorned with photos of the boys, their family and friends, that you presumed their mother had hung. you’d been here so many times, but this time it felt like you were really present, and not just following the leader. you found yourself observing much more than you usually had.

“yeah, it’s insane.” you agreed, as you both walked through the empty kitchen and dining area, with all of the lights switched off.

you wondered if nick and matt were already asleep, or if they were out and would come home any moment to see you alone with their brother. you also wondered if his parents were away, or if they too would come home to find you with their son, your boyfriend nowhere to be found. god, you didn’t even want to think about it.

you both quietly walked up the stairs and towards his room, which was the last one down the very end of the hallway. you had never been in his room, the usual hangout spot was always the living room. you felt so guilty, as you head into his room hesitantly behind him. chris’ room wasn’t what you had expected, it was quiet and cozy, a juxtaposition of himself. his double bed was shoved in the corner, with plain black sheets, and a desk beneath the window with a matching drawer set on the opposing wall, his guitar lay against the wall beside his them.

“so, did nate end up convincing you to come?” he asked, breaking the thick silence between you.

nate doesn’t know i’m here. you thought, biting your lips.

“no, actually. it was all me.“ you tell him, kicking your feet awkwardly.

“huh, i didn’t think you’d come.” he said, grabbing his guitar.

“me neither.” you chuckle awkwardly, “but thanks for doing this though, i really appreciate it.”

“all good.” he says calmly, “i did promised i’d teach you.”

“you did.” you repeat, smiling at him. you watched the way his hair was falling softly over his eyes, and he had to keep pushing it back with his hand.

chris handed you the guitar, and you sat down on the edge of his bed. you balanced it on your thigh, “is this how i hold it?”

“yeah, just make sure it’s pressed a little closer to you.” he explains, sitting down beside you. you do as he says, pressing the instrument close to your stomach, trying to get used to the feeling.

“so, how about you give me a song you want to learn and we’ll start there. one with easy chords if you can.” chris says, his voice slightly softer than usual. you wondered if it’s because he was tired, or if he truly was being patient with you, as you’d never seen him so calm.

you think for a moment, back to the songs you were listening on the drive to his house. “do you know fade into you? by mazzy star?”

“yeah that’s a good one, just give me a second to work it out.” he says, pausing as he looked to the ceiling and waved his finger around as if he was writing imaginary chords and trying to piece it together in his mind.

you admired him up close now, as you had never been able to. you always saw him in conjunction with his brothers, but never alone. you noticed how his nose differed and was slightly more button like, and his lips were plump and fuller, his hair a little darker.

“okay, that’s not too hard, but i’ll try and make it as easy as i can. you’re only going to be using C, D, G and Am’s.” he told you, and it took everything in you not to melt on the spot. god, what was wrong with you? you inhaled deeply, finding your composure.

“here, it might be easier if i show you first.” he says, softly taking the guitar from you and placing it in his own lap. he held it much more comfortably than you, and he grabbed the pick that was between the strings at the neck. he held it between his teeth briefly, as he tuned the guitar. his hair fell over his eyes once more, and you were grateful for this as he wouldn’t see you gawking at him.

eventually, he started to strum the first chords. “watch how my fingers are placed on the neck, that’s the important part.”

chris began to play the familiar opening of the song, and you’re completely mesmerised. you watched his lips mouth the words softly under his breath, as if he didn’t notice he was completely lost in the song. you sat with your legs crossed, facing him fully, and rested your chin on your palm. he looked so at peace, like this was what he truly loved doing. you knew this is how nate felt with hockey, and it made you remind yourself just how insane you were acting.

he abruptly stopped by holding his palm on the strings to stop them, and looked up at you to meet your eyes. you blinked at him, blankly.

“you alright?” he asked with a smirk tugging his lips.

you nod, looking away from him. “yeah just, out of my depth i think.”

“it’s cool. what if i show you like this-“ he starts, reaching over to put the guitar back in your lap. he crawled around to sit behind you, but his legs were crossed, establishing a boundary. one you secretly wished wasn’t there.

you could feel his breath on your neck, and the cold winter breeze was a thing of the past. he peered over your shoulder to look down at your hands on the guitar, and began to move them into place. “you’ve got to hold the strings like this.”

it was so intimate, and you couldn’t help but wish things where like this with you and nate. the way chris was so tender with you, so patient, not that nate wasn’t- things were like this, at the start. but you felt you’d grown so distant, and things didn’t get you hot and bothered like they used to. but this, this made you think thoughts you wish you could bury deep down into the pits of your stomach.

chris assisted your hands in strumming the chords, explaining to you which chord was which as you moved your fingers against the strings. his hands were so warm, so inviting, his fingers long and slender and-

“are you getting this?” chris asked, breaking you from your daze.

“um, not really.” you said bashfully, ducking your head. “i’m sorry, i just…”

chris sighed heavily, removing his hands from yours and coming around to sit beside you once more so that you were face to face on the edge of his bed.

he pursed his lips, furrowing his eyebrows. “why did you really come? because it seems to me you’re not here for guitar lessons.”

your eyes went wide, and you began toying with the guitar strings mindlessly. “i did, it’s just…”

“it’s okay, you can tell me.” he urged, and you felt your stomach drop in guilt.

“i…” you begin, but couldn’t articulate yourself. “i don’t know.”

you placed the guitar onto the ground, sighing. “i’m sorry, i guess i just wanted company.”

“is everything okay? is it nate?” chris questioned, rubbing his face.

“no, nate’s great it’s just…” you pause, truly unable to string together a sentence. not with chris in front of you, so beautiful yet so unknowing.

“are you…not being taken care of?” he asked, his voice low.

there was a thick pause between you before you answered. “how do you mean?”

“you know exactly what i mean.” chris said in a knowing manner, tilting his head.

“i’m not talking about this with you.” you huffed, trying your best to act nonchalant. to make invisible boundaries for yourself, as you weren’t so sure how long you could hold it together.

he tutted, rolling his eyes. “why?”

“i’m fine, he’s only an hour away. we have phone sex like, all the time anyway.” you were blatantly lying at this point. there was something deeply wrong, or you wouldn’t be seeking out attention elsewhere. here.

chris chuckled, crossing his arms. “i might not be a smart guy but i can tell you’re frustrated. you’re looking at me like you’re going to pounce me any moment.”

you scoffed, although he was right. “what? you’re delusional.”

“am i?” he said, smirking. he was enjoying this. and a sick twisted part of you was too.

you groaned, running your hands down your face. “i feel so stupid talking to you about this.”

“it isn’t stupid.” he assured you, “now spit it out, what’s wrong?”

chris was ridiculously convincing when he wanted to be. just like how he had roped you into coming tonight. there was something about him so deliciously dangerous, that made you question your sanity and morals.

you let out a heavy sigh before you spoke. “it’s been months.”

there was a pause, as chris widened his eyes at you once he realised what you were talking about. “months?”

“yes. it’s never been this long, but i guess it’s because he lives so far now.” you explained, your cheeks flushing at the thought. things with nate used to always be so fun, you would sleep together multiple times a week, never be apart- but lately? you felt like you’d been left behind.

“do you think it’s because he’s busy with college?” chris asked, surprising you with how seriously he was taking you.

“yeah, i mean he’s trying so hard, and there are scouts at nearly every game now so he’s thing even more. then when he’s got college break and drives down here, i think by the time he sees me he’s just exhausted.” you blurt out, beginning to feel a little less weight on your chest like it had been holding you down to keep all of this inside.

chris nods, and reaches towards you to touches your back, “it’s alright, i mean i’m sure it’s nothing against you…he’s just busy.”

“i know, but that’s the problem. i never see him, and when i do he never wants to go out or do anything because he’s always so tired. if he’s not training he’s playing, and if it’s not that he’s studying, and it takes up all of his time.” you complain, but are soothed by the feeling of his hand circling your back.

“that’s a shame, for a girl like you…” chris trailed off, like he knew if he kept talking he would be crossing the line. but the lines were blurred at this point, anyway.

his hand slowly trailed down to your lower back, the thick material of your sweater a barrier to his soft touch that you ached for more of. it was so reckless of you, to be revelling in another man’s touch- but it felt so good.

“i could make you feel good.” he continued in a subtle whisper, biting his lips as he gave you a once over, your body is basking in the warmth of his gaze. this was wrong, so so very wrong.

“chris.” you warned him, as he brought his other hand to clasp over yours which rested on your thigh.

your breath was slightly disturbed, stuttering in your throat. god, why did this have to feel so good?

chris’s hand that was on your back now trails upwards to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. you hadn’t noticed how close he was, but hated how much you loved him invading your space.

“he doesn’t have to know.” he told you, brushing your hair away from your neck, his breath fanning your skin.

“i cant.” you croaked, as he slowly pressed his warm lips to the skin behind your ear.

it’s as if your brain shut down and your body took over, letting out a soft moan as chris kissed your skin, then continuing down to the junction of your neck and shoulder. he pulled your sweater to the side, giving him better access.

“hmm, chris we can’t.” you protested, a hand coming to rest on his shoulder gently.

“shhh.” he hushed as he pulled away from you, locking eyes. “let me take care of you.”

you looked at him with so much pain, yet so much longing. he held your face gently in his hands, stroking your cheek. “he won’t know.”

chris pressed his lips to yours softly, and you let yourself sink into his arms. he helped you onto his lap, your kisses becoming feverish and desperate yet still passionate. you found your hips slowly grinding down onto his, earning deep moans and slightly more aggressive kisses. you rolled your hips down onto his growing hardness, the friction through your clothing feeling euphoric.

chris pulled away for a moment, combing your hair back with his fingers so he could look at you. his eyes were dark, pupils blown and his lips glistening and plump.

“you’re so pretty.” he mumbled, “you’ve always been.”

you wanted to die, having this beautiful man beneath you at your mercy but a loyal boyfriend waiting for you only an hour away. your mind was becoming fuzzy, blurring what your body needed and what was right. you suddenly pulled away completely, getting off his lap and holding a hand to your forehead.

“i’m sorry…i…i cant do this.” you confessed, shaking your head.

chris opened his mouth to speak, but you didn’t allow him- darting out of his room quickly and running down the stairs. your breathing was so loud it was in your ears, your heart thumping in your throat and the walls feeling as if they were closing in on you. you grabbed your boots and burst out the front door, trudging through the thick snow in your socks. you threw your shoes into the passenger seat and jumped into your car at record speed, quickly starting the ignition. chris didn’t follow you.

you drove home in complete silence, your breathing becoming more rapid and the world feeling as though it was going to collapse around you. you got home and made a beeline for your room, changing into your pyjamas at record pace. guilt riddled you as you crawled into bed, cuddling yourself under the sheets and hiding from everything and everyone. you just wanted to stay there and rot.

you found yourself texting chris, wanting to have proof that you declined. that nothing else happened. that you ran away.

you: i’m sorry, that shouldn’t have happened.

it was only a few moments before he texted you back.

chris: no it shouldn’t have.

you: that can’t happen again.

chris: not until next time.

your eyes widened, no, no no! this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. he was supposed to have regretted it to, and want tp bury the memory deep down. you ignored him, laying your phone next to your head as you tried to close your eyes, hoping it would go away. until your phone buzzed, lighting up.

chris: meet me at mine tomorrow, 8pm?

your stomach dropped, and you held your face in your hands as you let out a silent scream. no, you couldn’t encourage this. but nate was an hour away, how would he know? it could only be while he’s away, then when he gets back you could pretend nothing happened! oh god, you were going to hell.

you: okay.

(chapter two.)

#sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo edit #sturniolo smut #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo smut #christopher sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo oneshot #chris sturniolo x you #christopher sturniolo x you #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x fem reader #guitar lessons

[daddyslilchickenfingers2]

Masturbation (Matt)

Request: None

Warnings: Sub Matt, mommy kink, friends to lovers, jacking off, soft dom y/n, praising, whiny Matt, getting caught, choking

Y/n’s pov

Don’t get me wrong, I love living with the triplets but sometimes being the only girl in a house with three rowdy boys can be a lot. Today I had the house to myself so I actually got to sleep in for once and do some cleaning without Chris making a mess two seconds later. After I cleaned up the house a little bit, I took a shower and got ready for a day of editing. I remembered that Matt had asked to borrow my MacBook last night since his was getting fixed but he never returned it.

I specifically told him not to open any folders but I didn’t tell him why, the reasoning behind it was I had folders with different modeling pictures in some of them. Photos that I most definitely did not need Matt or Chris seeing, more specifically they were pictures of me in lingerie for a brand deal that was being used on their website. I decided I would just go get it back since he wasn’t home so I ascended my way up the stairs to his bedroom. Obviously, since he wasn’t home I entered his room without knocking and I was shocked.

Not only was Matt home and in his bedroom, he was sitting at his desk with my laptop open. There on the screen was one of my pictures from the lingerie shoot, more specifically the one where I was wearing the skimpiest set. Matt was shirtless with his sweats and boxers pulled halfway down his thighs, cock in hand as he was jerking off. His eyes were closed and he was quietly moaning as he stroked his big dick, swiping his thumb over the slit every few strokes to spread and use his precum as lube.

He seemed to not hear or notice me come in so I thought I’d have some fun, instead of being mad I was oddly turned on. I walked up behind his chair, placing my hands on his shoulders as I leaned closer to his ear. “What are you doing Matty? I thought I told you not to open my folders?” I spoke in a seductive voice. Matt flinched stilling his movements “I- I- Shit Y/n I’m so so so sorry! Fuck I don-“ he started nervously stuttering, I moved my right hand to wrap around his as I made him resume his previous movements. “I didn’t tell you to stop, c’mon finish what you started” I teased him.

Matt whimpered at my words as I made him slowly move his hand up and down his hard cock. I spun his chair around to face me, loving the embarrassed and nervous look his face held as he avoided eye contact with me, “What happened Matty? I thought you were a good boy?” I pouted at him. His eyes shot up to look at mine “I am a good boy! I promise I am!” I wasn’t expecting Matt to be so submissive but I was loving it. I stopped our hands, removing his from his hard cock as I looked back at him with a gaze that made him squirm “If you were a good boy you would’ve listened to me baby. I guess you just aren’t a good boy huh?” I teased bending down so we were eye level with each other.

The next thing that came out of his mouth shocked me but oddly turned me on even more “No I am, I’m your good boy mommy! Promise I’m your good boy! I’m sorry, please mommy, I didn’t mean to…” he whined as his cheeks turned a deep shade of pink. “But good boys listen Matty, you didn’t listen love” I said while stroking his cheek as his eyes teared up, “I d-don’t wanna b-be a bad boy! I di-didn’t mean to, I-I’m sorry!” He was about to cry and his cock was so hard, dripping precum against his stomach as he desperately tried to apologize.

“I know baby but you didn’t listen to my one rule. I should punish you, just tie you up and edge you until your brothers come back but I’m not that mean. I still think you should be punished though” Matt’s cock twitched, leaking out more precum as I spoke. “I’ll make it up to you mommy! I wanna be your good boy, wanna make you feel good! Please mommy I’m sorry!” he begged as a few tears fell but he was quick to wipe them away.

I took his hands in mine as I stood up, looking down at him I said “Awe it’s okay Matty, don’t cry. You wanna be mommy’s good boy, right?” nodding he pleaded “Please” as he looked up at me, squeezing my hands. I moved some hair out of his face “Go lay down for me baby, you’re gonna let mommy ride you okay?” he quickly stood up pushing his pants down the rest of the way down before fully taking them off.

Matt laid down on the bed, watching me as I teasingly took off my clothes, making Matt whine. I got onto the bed and sat on my knees next to Matt who was staring at me, his eyes scanning over my body as his mouth was slightly opened. “What’s wrong Matty? Never seen a girl naked before?” I teased him while tracing a finger down his chest before going down to slowly stroke his cock, “I- I have, you’re just really pretty. Was just admiring you mommy” he says innocently. “Awe thank you baby” I replied giving him a sweet kiss, “Can I touch you please?” He asked in a sweet voice as I moved to straddle him, spreading my wetness across his hard cock as I grinded down on him. “Only because you asked so nicely my love” I smiled at him pushing his hair back. Matt’s hands came to rest on my hips helping me rock back and forth as I pulled him in for a kiss, quickly dominating it.

I pulled away moving my kisses down his neck, giving him a few hickies before Matt whined “Mommy please, I wanna be inside you, wanna make you feel good” he begged. I nodded and slowly slid down onto his dick pulling a moan from the both of us, “You’re so big Matty, making mommy feel so good” I praised him while I started slowly bouncing up and down. The praising made Matt let out a little whimper as blush spread across his cheeks, “F-feels good, s-so good” he whined out as his hands still firmly held onto my waist, his grip getting tighter as I started riding him faster.

“You’re being such a good boy for me baby, you look so cute underneath me like this. Do you like when mommy rides you Matty?” I praised him some more as he looked up at me, his pupils fully dilated and his lips slightly parted as he let out uneven breaths and whiney moans. He nodded erratically as his nails dug into my hips “Yes! Yes, feels so good! You’re so pretty mommy, ca-can you umm…” Matt moaned out before trailing off and looking anywhere but at me. I moved his chin up so he was looking at me before placing a small kiss on his lips “Can I what, baby? What do you want me to do?” I asked him while pushing some of his hair back.

We were both getting close, I could tell by Matts increased breathing and moans, “Can y-you choke me p-please mommy?” Matt asked, grabbing my hand and playing with my fingers, kind of catching me off guard. I did as he asked, wrapping my hand around his throat but not really applying any pressure, “Tighter, please” he begged, turning me on even more, I never thought I’d have a thing for choking a guy during sex but with Matt it was different. “Feel good Matty? You like it when I choke you, baby?” “F-feels so good, can I please cum?” he whined as I started moving faster if that was even possible. Matt used his hands on my waist to help me move as he started to buck up his hips from being sensitive.

“In a second baby, I want to cum with you” I told him while tightening my hand around his throat a bit more as Matt whined, deciding he would help me cum faster by rubbing my clit. He looked up at me with innocent eyes as he did some “Is this okay mommy?” He asked innocently, “Yes it’s okay Matty, you’re being such a good boy for me” I panted out making Matt let out a loud moan. “Cum with me baby, be a good boy and fill me with your cum” I moaned, pulling Matt in for a rough and heated kiss. I tightened around him as I came, making Matt pull away from the kiss, throwing his head back. He let out a loud whimper/moan as he came inside of me before hiding his face in my neck as we both stopped our movements and I removed my hand from his throat.

I slowly pulled off of Matt’s dick making him hiss at the feeling before I got up and made my way to the bathroom to clean myself up. I returned to Matt’s room with a damp washcloth to clean him up as well “C’mon Matt let me help you get dressed before I go downstairs to get myself dressed” I told the tired looking boy. “Mhm no ‘m tired, stay for cuddles please! Wear one of my shirts and come lay down with me” he pleaded with me. Sighing in defeat I grabbed one of Matt’s shirts, throwing it over my head before going to grab two pair of his boxers, throwing a pair at him as we both got dressed. I laid down for the rest of the day, cuddling with Matt, hoping hid brothers wouldn’t have questions when they got home.

Taglist: @angelic-sturniolos111 @biimpanicking @biplrbtch @chrisenthusiast @chrisolivia4l @christinarowie332 @chr1sgirl4life @delimeats-000 @dev-speaks @ermdontmindthisaccount @flowerxbunnie @fionaheartswomen @heartsforchrisandmatt @iheartchrissturniolo @ilovemattsturn @its-jennarose @justaslvttygirl @kvtie444 @lustfulslxt @luvysworld @m6ttsturniolo @mangosrar @mangoposts @meerkatzthings @mattsnutsack @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @recklesssturniolo @solarsturniolo @soursturniolo @strniohoeee @sturniolohoe @sturniolopepsi

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#sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #smut #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplet smut #sturniolo smut #sturniolo triplets smut #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #sturniolos #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo smut #christopher sturniolo #christopher sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo x you #matthew sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo x you #sturniolo triplets imagine #the sturniolo triplets

[lovingmattysposts]

Friends with Benefits Part 4

welcome to the illicit affairs chapter, you have been warned enjoy..

P1 P2 P3 P5 P6

paring: y/n and matt sturniolo

Summary:You and Matt are best friends, who occationaly have sex on the low. No string attached, just sex. Well, just sex for him. Little did he know you were falling in love and falling fucking fast.

warnings: smuttt (lowkey nothing major), mentions of not eating, depression, anxiety, drugs, effects of being high, drinking, cursing

first of all i just want to thank you guys so deeply for the love and the never ending requests for the next part of this series. The fact that i wrote this before i had tumblr and was never planning on releasing for others to love, blows my mind. this one is a long one and a rollercoaster, love y'all.

xoxo, Autumn.

Y/n pov

I never thought my body or mind could handle the amount of pain it's endured over these past few days. Never thought the amount of tears that have come out of me was possible either. But here we are. I haven't let my bed in days. I've just been watching reruns of the vampire diares and the notebook feeling sorry for myself. Yeah, I'll admit it. I have nothing else to do but feel what i'm feeling and I think that's the worst kind of punishment you can have.

I heard the door of my room creek open. I glanced over seeing Lucy peek in my room. She smiled. I just looked at her. "Good, you're up" She smiled walking in with a plate of food. I sighed leaning back as she walked up to my bed.

"I made eggs, hash brown casserole, I know how much you love that so I made extra" She smiled up at me. I smiled softly at her. "Bacon and some fruit" She pointed to the plate. "Well-I didn't make the fruit, but I cut it" She said laughing to herself. I just looked at the plate of food.

"You don't have to eat it, but I thought If you did get hungry you could have something good" She said setting the plate down on my side table. "Thanks Luce" I said softly. She nodded but didn't leave.

"I know this is the last thing you wanna hear right now, but how are you doing?" She asked cautiously. I just looked down at my lap. Just hearing the sentence tore my heart in two. I breathed, leaning back.

"Better" I lied. She smiled and nodded. She looked down at my shirt-Matt's shirt. I hadn't taken it off since Lucy gave it back to me that night. It's the only part of him I have left. The only smell of him left in this house. The only thing that I can keep of him. I looked down at the shirt and looked away from her.

"If you need anything-anything at all-" She said looking up at me. "I know Lucy" I breathed, she nodded and started to walk away, but I sat up. "Lucy?" I asked making her turn around. She raised her eyebrows looking at me. "Has-" I bit my lip. "Has he texted you at all?" I whispered. She sighed looking down, before shaking her head slightly. I sighed before nodding.

"Okay I just thought-" I stopped myself. "Okay" I nodded pulling the covers back over me. I let out a breath, before I heard Lucy close the door to my room. I felt tears come on again. He hasn't even tried to reach out. It must really be over. I don't think I can maintain a reality without Matt. I let out a shaky breath as I felt a tear drop onto my nose. I wiped it quickly, imagining it was Matt, telling me everything was going to be okay. But it wasn't and it was never going to be.

I closed my eyes as a silent sob came out as I gripped the T-shirt inhaling his scent. The scent I loved so much. The scent I craved. The scent that was like a drug, because it was his.

-

They said that grief comes in waves. That there are different 'stages' as people say. They say you can go back and forth between stages but they usually most of the time stay in order. It's been almost an entire week since that dreadful night and I've allowed myself to cry and cry and cry. Cry on the shower floor, cry in bed, cry in front of the mirror and I was done with it.

I was still hurt, I felt it in my chest like an elephant laying on my chest, but tonight I wanted to move past what I was feeling. To mask it. To forget about it, even if it was just for a few hours. If I could trick my brain into thinking about anything other than Matt Sturniolo for just a few hours, I didn't care If that meant it would take me twice as long to get over him.

I felt my phone buzz beside me. I stood frozen for a second, before hesitantly picking up my phone. I opened my phone to messages and sighed when I saw a text from Tommy.

from:Tommy Boy

Ayo Y/n/n, party tonight at Zao's place. It'd be cool if you came be there or be 🟥

I shook my head and smiled at the text. Tommy. An old friend of mine, we have been friends since high school. I've known him for like forever. We've always been close but ever since I started seeing Matt, we stopped hanging out so much. That and the fact that he's a hard-score stoner. Not really my vibe, but he was always a good friend and fun to be around nonetheless.

That was until Matt was around him and that whole thing went down about 2 months into our friends with benefits thing.

"Shut the fuck up" I died laughing pushing Tommy's chest. Tommy laughed looking down. Matt stood beside me on my left while Tommy spoke in front of us with a joint in between his finger.

"I swear you did. You looked the guy in the eyes and said that If his pull out game was a strong as his attitude maybe he wouldn't have knocked Sarah up" Tommy said reminiscing on an old story from high school. I wiped tears from my eyes as I laughed. I shook my head.

"I was drunk" I stated. "Still a badass move" He said taking a rip from the joint. I looked up at Matt, who's eyes were fixated on Tommy. "Why don't you ever come around anymore Y/n/n? The guys miss you. Even Blake, who you shitted on so hard." Tommy laughed. I rolled my eyes smiling.

"You're the only girl cool enough to smoke with, everyone else is so uptight nowadays" He sighed. I glanced up at Matt who's eyes were still on Tommy. I sighed looking down. "You know life lately is crazy. I've just been caught up in shit" I said looking at him. He nodded looking down and then at Matt.

"Or caught up in your little boyfriend"  He motioned to Matt. I glanced at Matt who's jaw was hard. "Oh we're not-" I started to say. "We're not together" Matt said over me. I looked at him, but he didn't look down at me. I swallowed the lump in my throat and looked back at Tommy.

"Yeah" I said quietly. Why did that kind of sting?  Tommy looked between us. "Dude, you're an idiot. If she'd give me the chance, I'd hop on that a long time ago" Tommy said taking another hit. Matt bit the inside of his cheek, his chest raising. I looked over at Tommy.

"Tommy" I felt my face go red. He rolled his eyes. "Oh come on y/n/n, I was kidding. You rejected me out-the-bat freshman year. I got the memo. I'm just saying you're a hot chick either way." He chuckled. I looked over at Matt who grabbed my arm slightly and pulled me away. I waved a slight wave at Tommy who smiled shaking his head.

I turned to Matt who's face was hard. "Matt" I said through gritted teeth as he dragged me back inside. He let me go and stopped in front of me. "What the fuck?" I whispered up at him.

"You can't hang out with him anymore" He said looking down at me. I scoffed. "Excuse me?" I asked raising my eyebrows. He looked to the side before back down at me. "He's a dickhead and did you see the way he was looking at your tits?" He asked briefly looking down at my chest. I glared at Matt.

"You mean the way you've been staring at my tits all night?" I asked raising my eyebrows. He rolled his eyes. "He wants to fuck you Y/n, I can see it in the way he looks at you" He said shaking his head, as if it was my fault. I shook my head. "Tommy's been my friend forever Matt" I breathed.

"I don't like the way he looks at you" he sighed looking down at me. I smiled looking up at him, wrapping my arms around his neck. "Matt are you jealous?" I smiled. He rolled his eyes. "No I'm just telling you that he looks at you the way I do" He said softly. "Hm" I hummed pulling him against me.

"Does that make you mad?" I whispered. He just looked at me. "Because you seemed a little mad back there" I said smiling. "I just want to be the only name you're screaming for the time being" He breathed. I rolled my eyes and released my arms and started to walk past him.

"You're ridiculous" I shook my head. He grabbed my waist and pulled me back in front of him effortlessly. "If you want to go around fucking random guys, go do it. I'm not telling you not to." He said pressing against me. "I'm just saying you and I both know they don't know how to please you the way I do. They don't know where to hit the spot that makes you see stars. They don't know that you like it when you can't walk the next day. You and I both know the only eyes you want staring at your tits are mine." He said into my ear. I swallowed as he leaned in front of my face.

"Tell me you won't hang out with him anymore and I can make all those things happen right now princess" He whispered. I blinked at him as he tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. I nodded slowly as I looked into his dark eyes.

He reached up sqeezing my jaw, opening my mouth. "Didn't hear you" He said. "I won't see him anymore" I said breathlessly. He smiled. "Good" He breathed before connecting our lips.

I blinked, attempting to forget the memory. This was what I was talking about. A break from the thoughts. Old friends. It would be nice. I texted Tommy back.

To: Tommy Boy

Weirdo, guess i'll see you there 🥱

I stood up, throwing my sheets off me and ripping the shirt from my body discarding it on my bed. I looked up walking over to my mirror. Looking at myself. I leaned in, looking at my face. My eyelashes were still wet and my cheeks slightly a pink color from the tears. I put on the most convincing smile. Pretty. I leaned back looking at my body, investigating it. Pretty.

I smiled letting out a breath before walking over and turning on my speaker. I shuffled through my playlist landing on love is embarrassing by Olivia Rodrigo. I played it loudly through the speaker before looking through my closet, not thinking about anything other than the sounds screaming through my speaker.

"I told my friends you were the one after I'd know you like a month"

"and I stayed in bed for like a week, when you said space was what you need. Waited by my phone like a-"

"GOD DAMN FOOL!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and shook my head as I danced around my room. I smiled as the song played, this felt good. I held up tops in the mirror before landing on a new one I had just got last week. I jumped up and down as the song played, swinging my head around, singing along. I pulled the top over my head as I moved over to pick out some jeans.

"love's embarrassing as hell" I sang to myself. 

I suddenly heard my door crack open. Lucy walked in with her eyes wide as she watched me slide the jeans on smiling.

"Get dressed!" I said over the music with a smile. She looked at me concerned. "Y/n, you're scaring me" She said withe straight face. I rolled my eyes and smiled walking over to her. "Come on, do you want me to be sad forever in here or do you want to go out and be normal?" I asked looking down at her. She just looked up at me, like she wasn't sure if i was serious.

She glanced to my speaker

"and I'd give up, I'd give up everything-" I smiled and jumped to the music, walking over to her. "And i'm planning out my wedding, for some guy i'm NEVER MARRYING!" I yelled moving around her. She just stared at me like I was a freak, and maybe I was, who cares. I sighed looking at her as the song ended.

"No tears, No sadness, No M-" I stopped myself, swallowing. She raised her eyebrows at me. "I'll let you wear my Chanel top" I said suddenly. Her mouth fell open. "Wow, you're serious" she said looking at me. I nodded. She smiled. "Deal" She breathed running to my dresser.

-

Matt pov

I heard my door crack open, but I didn't move. Normally If I just didn't move they would think I was asleep and they would leave.

"Nick went to drop Nate and Justin off at the airport" I heard Chris's voice say. I didn't say anything and I heard him sigh. "Matt" He stated. I rolled over and looked at him. He looked sadly down at me.

"You can't stay in here forever" He said walking fully into my room, making me groan. He stopped and crossed his arms. "You've been in here all week long, in the dark, alone" He said looking down at me. I just looked up at him. "It's getting sad" He breathed. I looked away from him.

"Are you done now?" I asked pulling the blankets back over to me. I heard him walk over and sit on my bed. I looked over at him. "Did you text Lucy?" He asked quietly. I looked down before pulling up my phone and pulling up the texts

to: Lucy (Y/n/n roomie)       Aug. 1  11:48pm

Lucy, is she okay? Please I just need to know if she's okay.

to: Lucy (Y/n/n roomie)      Aug. 1 11:52pm

I need to talk to her. She didn't give me a chance. I have to make sure she's okay.

to: Lucy (Y/n/n roomie)   Aug. 2    1:03am

I know she likes to go home to her parents when she's stressed. Is she there? Is she at the apartment? Is she doing okay? Does she want to see me?

to: Lucy (Y/n/n roomie)   Aug. 3  11:58am

Lucy. Im dying here just tell me that she's okay. I don't want to overwhelm her, does she want to see me?

to: Lucy (Y/n/n roomie)    Aug. 4    3:07pm

I can't live without her please.

Chris looked up from the phone after scanning the messages. "Not a single response?" He asked, I shook my head. He sighed. "Maybe you should just text Y/n" He said looking at me. I looked up at the ceiling, feeling my heart clench even at her name. I let out a breath.

"I can't say what I need to say over the phone to her. She won't listen unless I make her" I said softly. Chris looked at me and sighed. "Then make her listen" He said standing up. "You said you wanted to fix this. You're saying you don't want to lose her, but you're letting her walk away" He said shaking his head. I bit my lip, he was right.

"What do I do?" I asked looking at him. He bit his lip, thinking. "Do you remember what happened when her dog died last year?" He asked looking down at me. I furrowed my eyebrows. "Chris I'm serious-" I said sitting up. He shook his head. "Think. How did she react?" He said looking at me. I squinted and looked down at my lap.

"She loved that damn dog like a child, she was devestated" I explained, remembering. He nodded. "She cried for a week straight and then she-" I paused sitting up. He raised his eyebrows at me smiling. "She snapped out of it for a couple hours and made us all go downtown to some party, she said it was how she processed things like it was like clockwork" I breathed looking at him. He nodded as he looked down at his phone.

"There a party on sunset, her old friends are there. If I had to guess that's where she'd be" Chris said standing up. I stood up quickly running to get my keys.

-

Y/n pov

"Drink" I said handing Lucy a bottle. She shoved it away from herself. "I'm driving remember" She shook her head. I sighed. "How am I suppose to have fun without you drinking withe me?" I whined. She rolled her eyes. "I'm here to make sure you don't do anything stupid" She smiled. I rolled my eyes before looking around.

"Like what?" I asked turning back to her. "Like hooking up with a random guy, or puking everywhere" She said narrowing her eyes at me. I sighed before pointing to guy. "Why? He's cute" I frowned looking at the boy. She lowered my hand. "He looks like Matt, and I'm not listening to you cry tomorrow morning after you regret it" She said looking at me. I rolled my eyes before bringing the bottle back up to my lips. She lowered the bottle.

"Slow down" She said softly. "Drink every time you say the M-word. I've made it my little game" I smiled sarcastically. She rolled her eyes. "I appreciate you wanting to move on Y/n/n, but you're deflecting. You realize you have to process these emotions at some point right?" She asked, making me walk away from her.

"I can't hear you! To busy deflecting!" I yelled as I walked away. I rolled my eyes as I set down the bottle and walked towards the bathroom. I knocked on the door and sighed as I waited. I saw a guy start to walk up to me. I just looked at him.

"Hey" He breathed. "Hey" I said looking down. "Where are you from?" He smiled looking down at me. I looked to the side and then back up at him. "Were in California aren't we?" I asked looking at him. He furrowed his eyebrows and smiled. "So?" He asked. "Use context clues" I smiled sarcastically. He laughed and looked down.

"I'm Thomas" He held out his hand. I looked down at his hand. "And I'm not interested" I smiled. He dropped his hand. "Boyfriend?" He asked. I sighed looking down. "Complicated" I explained. He nodded. I suddenly felt a wave of guilt come over me.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to be rude, I've just had a hard week" I sighed. He shook his head. "You're okay, I get it. This city will get to you" He laughed. I nodded smiling. He reached in his pocket. "I got something to take you're mind off it if you're interested" He said holding two pills. I looked down at them, suddenly feeling nervous. I don't take pills like that.

"Oh, No thanks I don't do that kind of stuff" I said shaking it off. He shrugged. "You should" He said popping one in his mouth. I just stared at him. "You're kind of beautiful to be in something that's complicated" He said smiling down at me. I smiled, when all of the sudden I felt eyes on me.

I furrowed my eyebrows and looked around me, feeling like I was being watched. I scanned the room before my eyes stopped. Brown hair, blue eyes, black t shirt, staring at me. Matt. My heart dropped to my toes. We stared at each other. He just looked at me from across the room. My body lit on fire. I couldn't do this. No. I can't. He can't-

My body filled with panic. I had to get out of here. I looked back up at the boy standing in front of me. "Nice to meet you, I have to leave" I said turning without waiting for a response, I didn't look back at Matt as I sped in the opposite direction and walked down a hallway, walking out onto the back porch. The cold air hit me as I attempted to breath. Air. Where was the air?

"Y/n/n?"

I turned quickly and I saw Tommy sitting in a chair, along with Blake, Tyler, and a few other people I knew. I turned around and didn't see anyone following me, so I looked back at him a soft smile.

"Hey" I breathed. He stood up off the chair and walked over to me wrapping me in a hug. "Thanks for coming, It's good to see you" He smiled letting me go. I nodded smiling. "Come sit" He said motioning to the open chair. I nodded looking back towards the door, still nothing. I walked over seeing a bunch of weed, rolling papers, and trays laid out on the table in front of everyone.

I raised my eyebrows and looked at him. "Should have known I'd find you out here" I laughed lightly. He smiled and nodded as he sat down next to me and picked up the joint he was previously rolling.

"Where's that little white boy you're always with?" He asked looking up at me briefly before going back to the blunt focusing on it. I looked down at his hands and then towards the door. "Uh" I breathed. I leaned back in the chair. "I don't know" I lied shrugging. He raised his eyebrows. "I didn't scare him off too badly did I?" He chuckled, making me smile. I shook my head.

"No, he just uh-we don't-" I stopped biting my lip. He nodded looking at me. "Ah, I see. No more white boy" He said. I sighed looking at the table. "No more white boy" I said back. He smiled. "Good. Now you can hang with me again" He smiled. I laughed and shook my head at him.

He finished the blunt and held it over to me. I shook my head scrunching my nose. "You know I don't smoke" I said pushing his hands away. "Yeah you're pussy ass lungs can't handle it" He chuckled. I rolled my eyes. "Whatever Tommy" I smiled. He leaned up reaching in his bag. "If you want to get high though, me and my buddy made these this morning" He said throwing a plastic bag of brownies on the table in front of us.

I looked at the bag and then to Tommy. Ediables. He looked at me as he lit the joint in his hands, inhaling it. I shrugged. "I don't know Tommy" I breathed. He rolled his eyes. "Sounds like you just went through a shitty breakup no?" He asked raising his eyebrows. I pursed my lips, looking down.

"And you're here to get over that because you wouldn't be here right now if white boy had a say. Am I right?" He asked leaning his hands on his knees. I sighed looking up at him. He shrugged leaning back. "I know you, you're deflecting" He pointed at me smiling. I pushed his shoulder shaking my head.

"Did you drink?" He asked. "A bit" A said quietly. "Then if you take an ediable it just intensifise the drunk part, you'll be good" He nodded. I sighed looking at it. "Just eat the damn brownie y/n/n" Tyler said from the other side of me, clearly high out of his mind. I groaned picking up the bag and staring at it.

Did I really want to do this? What would Matt say? Why wasn't he coming and looking for me? I bit my lip. Does he not care? Why is he here?

I closed my eyes. Get out of your head Y/n. This was the whole purpose of tonight. Forget about it for a little while. Just eat that damn brownie.

I blinked my eyes opened. "Girl, you're freaking me out" Blake laughed. I glared at him. "Shut up, don't you have a baby at home?" I said his face dropped as Tommy and Tyler laughed.

I opened the bag and took the brownie out. I looked at it before taking a bite and chewing it. Tommy just looked at me as I swallowed it. I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Damn girl that was a big ass bite" Tyler laughed. "Ew, it tastes like grass" I laughed. Tommy nodded. "That's what it is dumbass" he said making me laugh. I sighed and leaned back. This would be good for me. Wouldn't it?

-

Matt pov

I practically ran out of my car and up to the front of the house, my heart beating out of my chest. Was she safe? Was she okay? Was she talking to another guy? My breathing was unsteady as I walked through the front door. My anxiety was at an all time high. I didn't even know if she was here. Something in my chest told me she was. I took in a breath as the crowd of people around me appeared.

I glanced around, looking for her. Face after face, nothing. I didn't recognize anyone. I swallowed as I moved through the crowd. How did I let it get to this point? I waited too long. My heart pounded against my chest, I could hear it in my ears. Please be here. Please be here. I moved by some people, one girl attempting to talk to me but I completely ignored her.

Y/n.Y/n.Y/n. Was the only thing I could hear in my mind. The music blaring so loud but I couldn't even hear it as I looked at girl after girl. None of them her. I walked into the kitchen, letting out a breath.

"Where are you?" I whispered glancing around the room. I walked past a group of people moving into the living room. My eyes scanned the room. My heart dropped when I saw her. She was leaned up against the wall, looking down. She looked so beautiful. Her jeans hugging all the right curves and her eyelashes batting slightly down, her hair tied up to show her face. I let a smile come to my face. Mine.

"Thank you God" I whispered. I let out a breath, before stepping forward but stopping when I saw a guy approach her. I stood frozen. My feet practically cemented to the ground as anger rose on my face.

I saw his mouth move, she glanced up at him responding and then looking back down. I just watched them from across the room. He spoke again, her face screaming 'i'm not interested' as she glanced away from him as she spoke.

Her sarcastic smile, made me smile. She wasn't interested. I let out a breath. He held out his hand but she just looked down at it and then back up at him with a straight face. This boy has no idea what he's doing clearly. She kept speaking to him and I saw him reach into his pocket saying something and holding two pills out in his hands. My heart dropped along with my smile.

Y/n don't. My mind screamed, but my feet wouldn't move. She looked down at his hands and shook her head. He shrugged before taking one.Y/n walk away. I wanted to scream. He said something making her smile. My face tightened, then her eyebrows furrowed as she glanced around the room, before her eyes landed on me.

The power of her gaze, of her acknowledgement almost making me sick. I swallowed as I saw the expression her face change, her face turned white as she stared back at me. We just looked at each other as I saw a million thoughts race through her head. She quickly turned back to the guy in front of her and said something before bolting in the opposite direction.

My heart dropped. No, please. I stepped forward, but felt someone grab my arm, pulling me backwards. I turned around glaring when I saw it was Lucy.

"What the hell are you doing here?" She snapped. I let out a breath, looking down at her. "Remove your arm from me now Lucy" I stated calmly. She roughly let go of my arm. "You're lucky i'm not ripping it clean-off dickhead" She spat at me. I pinched the bridge of my nose. There's no way I'm dealing with this right now.

"Seriously. What are you doing here? You need to leave" She crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm not leaving" I said shaking my head looking at her. Her face hardened. "She doesn't need this. Not tonight. Not right now. She's trying to move on. Why won't you let her?" She said shaking her head looking up at me. I swallowed. "She's deflecting. She's not moving on. You don't call this moving on" I said motioning to the party around me.

"You don't think I know that Matt? She's my best friend" She sighed looking at me. I turned looking towards the direction she walked. "Don't" Lucy warned making me look back at her. I glared harshly. "Do you know what you've done to that poor girl? She hasn't left her room in a week. She's not talking to me- She's not eating. God, she's not even herself!" She yelled at me. My heart clenched. I looked down at my feet, swallowing imagining what Y/n's been going through completely alone.

"Why didn't you respond to my texts?" I asked looking at her. She sighed looking to the side and then back to me. "Because you don't get to know how she's doing Matt. You don't get to know if she's talked about you or if she wants to see you or any of that shit Matt, because you're not apart of her life anymore. You don't get the priveledge of knowing what's happening with her at all" She shook her head. I bit my lip. She was right. I didn't deserve to know anything.

"Did you tell her I've been texting you?" I asked raising my eyebrows. She just looked at me with pursed lips. "Lucy, come on." I groaned. She shook her head holding her hands up. "I'm not apologizing for it either. It's better for her if she thinks you haven't reached out" She said looking at me. I shook my head letting out a shaky breath.

"You don't understand Lucy. You don't understand anything about us. We're-" I stopped. Why was I sitting here explaining this to her and not searching for Y/n. "I'm not doing this. I'm going to find her" I said turning and walking away. She grabbed my arm again stopping me.

"Not if I can help it, leave Matt. She doesn't want you here" She said glaring at me. I ripped my arm away. "Lucy" I said closing my eyes letting out an angry breath. "No, you can't keep playing this game with her! You're selfish! You're-" She yelled at me.

"I love her goddammit!" I yelled back, her face dropped. I just looked down at her shaking my head. "I'm so fucking in love with her, I can't even think straight" I breathed. She closed her eyes sighing. "You're an idiot Matthew" She breathed calmly. I bit my lip. "Don't you think I know that? I'm trying to fix this" I said feeling tears brim at my eyes. She tapped her foot, looking at me contemplating believing me.

"I c-can't live without her please" I whispered looking at her. She rolled her eyes before looking at me sadly. She licked her lips. "You check upstairs, I'll ask around if anyone saw where she went" She said looking at me with a straight expression. I sighed a breath of relief and smiled.

"Thank you" I breathed. She nodded looking annoyed. "Go" she waved me on. I nodded before turning and running towards the steps. I could barley see, my mind was racing as I ran up the steps of the house. I looked from side to side, seeing people crowding the hallways. I sighed, worry filling my chest. I walked to the bathroom and banged on the door.

"Someone's in here" I heard a girl say. I banged on the door harder. I few seconds later two girls I didn't recognize opened the door with a annoyed expression. "Geez how bad do you have to pee?" One blonde said angrily. I looked behind them, she wasn't in there.

"Fuck" I whispered before turning down the hall, opening a door walking in seeing a group of people sitting and talking. None of them were her. I swallowed walking out without saying anything. Opening door after door, people making out, people doing drugs, people passed out. Not one were her.

I swung one door open to see two people full on having sex. I closed my eyes and slammed the door, trying to delete the imagine from my brain. I shook with disgust. God, I hope that's not what we look like.

I opened the door beside it and saw two people pressed against each other against the wall. My heart dropped, brown hair, jeans. Please, no. Please, no. I froze looking at them. Y/n No please no, don't be you. God please don't let it be her. Not her. Not mine. Someone else's not mine.

The two people pulled apart glaring over at me. Blue eyes, big nose, not her. I sighed of relief, leaning back. "Sorry" I breathed walking out of the room, closing the door. I closed my eyes and sighed.

Y/n, where were you?

-

Y/n pov

"If you think about it science fiction is not really science fiction because the fiction part of it might actually be true, we just don't know it yet" Tyler said looking up. We all looked at him with a blank stare.

"Dude" Tommy laughed leaning back. Blake started dying laughing and I chuckled to myself, shaking my head as smoke circled around me. "I hate this conversation" I laughed. "Then let's talk about you" Tommy said motioning to me. I shook my head leaning back. "Let's not" I smiled. He rolled his eyes.

"You feeling anything yet?" He asked, I shrugged. "Not really" I replied. "Then eat the rest" He motioned to the half finished brownie. I furrowed my eyebrows looking down at it. "Dude" Tyler said looking over at Tommy. "What? She must have a high tolerence" He shrugged. I just glanced between them. I was feeling it a little bit, I was a tad foggy but not high.

"Should I?" I asked looking at him. He glanced over at me. "Are you still thinking about white boy?" He asked taking another hit of his joint. I sighed looking down. His face, eyes, smile, and voice came over my mind like a storm. I bit my lip.

"Eat the brownie" He said clearly knowing my answer. I sighed picking up the brownie eating the rest slowly. Tommy smiled as he went on to talk with the rest of the people around us. We'd been sitting out here for almost 30 minutes now. I engaged in the conversation here and there, but mostly just listened. I was really trying to feel the effects of the entire weed brownie I just ingested.

Now, I feel kind of stupid. Turning to drugs just to forget. I placed my hand against my forehead. God, i'm an idiot. I looked towards the door. I wondered If Matt left. I wondered if he came to see me or happened to be here and saw me and the left. I wondered if he missed me, or at least the sex. God. I leaned back looking up at the sky.

I was calm. I smiled to myself, wait this was cool.

"Y/n/n?"

I looked up and everyone was looking at me. I smiled loosley at them. Tommy chuckled. "You feeling it sweetheart?" He asked. I nodded, feeling myself start to laugh. Tommy shook his head smiling.

I missed Tommy. I wondered if he did want to fuck me though, I wondered if Matt was right. I scrunched my nose. Ew. Thinking about having sex with anyone other than Matt made me physically Ill. I wondered If Matt thought the same thing. Ah, Matt. He's so cute. His eyes were so blue. I loved him so much. Why was I mad at him again?

I blinked slowly, trying to regain my thoughts. Wow, my head hurt. I swallowed leaning up and sitting forward, but my vision came afterwards. I closed my eyes grasping my hands on the sides of the chair, trying to regain my sense of movement. I blinked my eyes open. Fuck. My vision was going in and out of focus and the people around me were here and then they weren't. The voices around me I no longer could hear. The chirping of the crickets around us were no longer chirpping.

I closed my eyes. Focus. You're just freaking yourself out, it's just weed. Just a drug, control yourself. You're stronger than it. I suddenly felt a jolt, as if someone touched me. My eyes shot open as I flinched, I gripped the sides of my chair.

I looked around and everyone looked at me like I was crazy. I looked around, horrified. Tommy leaned into me. "You....Okay?" His voice was slow. I squinted my eyes at him. Why was he talking so slow? I just looked at him trying to understand him. My heart felt like it was beating out of my chest. Oh no. Oh god no. I was too aware of my heart beating and I was too aware of my breathing as I attempted to breathe in.

I saw the door open that led out to where we were. I glanced slowly and I saw what looked like Matt, the boy I loved so much. But he wasn't here. Was he? I narrowed my eyes and saw Matt sighed and a worried expression spread across my face. I squinted my face as I gripped the sides of the chair harder, screaming in my head. Fuck.

Matt, help. Matt help me please. Baby. Please. Help, I'm so high. Help, I think I'm dying. I'm freaking out. I can't breathe.

eekkkk live laugh love life uhh see yall tomorrow? (im sorry)

tag list: @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @miastromboli @secret-sturniolo @strunsclutter @sturniolodreamz @ejswift @mmm1234 @dandeluvr @paper-crab @mwah0mwah

#nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo #Spotify

[charcoallbaby]

dirty little secret

smut! choking, cheating and reader gets tied up.

someone asked for a cheating matt so here!!! very rushed but hope you enjoy! happy to be writing again.

every friday at 6:30pm he was outside my door, waiting in his car until i came outside. the second he saw me close my apartment door after myself, he immediately got out of his car, opened the passenger door for me and got back into the drivers seat.

when i got into his car, he would greet me, drive to a enclosed area and fuck me rough in his back seats.

our schedule is friday night until sunday night. he fucks me for them 2 days straight.

no one knows what we do together. not his best friend, not my bestriend not even his own brothers know what we do on the weekends. well i know for a fact that they can hear us, well mostly me. he tells me to be quiet when he’s thrusting into me but i can’t help but scream from his size.

if i ever see him in public which i mostly do, he’s my boyfriends close friend.

my boyfriend tucker. brief summary of him; he treats me like shit, he can’t make me come(matt always makes me come) and he works late on weekends so i never see him, he doesn’t suspect anything.

matt’s brothers don’t know that it’s me he’s fucking. if they knew he would definitely be called out.

as i was saying, if i ever see him in public i can’t be caught looking at him, even when he’s talking. it’s one of his rules. he’s the quietest out of the whole group, so there’s not a lot of talking coming from him.

he rubs my damp panties underneath the table with his veiny hands, with long fingers and thick rings covered on them and no one bats an eye.

it was a friday night. it was my twenty-first. my best friend violet organised a party with all our friends, matt included of course. violet made sure it was at the bar my boyfriend works at, so he could “see me.” it’s only because they don’t ID and she’s still twenty. i made sure to buy a nice fitting dress that showed my curves and of course, my boobs were nearly spilling out of it, it was all for matt. i didn’t care if my boyfriend stared at me, i didn’t care if any random guy stared at me. all i cared about was if matt stared at me. i wanted him to punish me for wearing such a revealing dress around him, i wanted him to not be able to contain himself around me.

matt and his two brothers chris and nick walked in through the door.

my breathing hitched. he looked so good.

rings covering his fingers, a chain around his neck that i loved to pull and that i broke way too many times.

“happy birthday!” nick chimed. i smiled at him, trying to not stare at his brother. “thank you nick, thank you both for coming!” my eyes skimmed past matt’s. i made eye contact with chris and smiled at him. he was sweet. “of course, where’s the restroom though?” “i’m gonna piss myself!” chris squealed. i laughed. “it’s over there to the right,” i pointed towards the back of the building. “thank you!” chris ran off. “is violet here?” nick asked. “yeah, she’s somewhere in the crowd of people.” “come find her with me!” nick dragged me by hand into the group of people.

“nick!” violet exclaimed, taking her arms off her boyfriend and wrapped her arms around nick. “how are you?” he asked pulling away. “i’m good!”

matt stood behind us. i could fill his presence. “i’m getting a drink nick, what do you want?” he mumbled. “dr pepper, you better buy the birthday girl a drink!” nick turned me around to look at matt.

matt stared down at me. i gulped. “what could you like birthday girl?” i could feel the dampness between my legs begin. “malibu and coke please.” he nodded his head before making his way over to the bar. he went straight up to tucker, my boyfriend. i tried to indulge in the conversation that violet and nick were having, i couldn’t. my eyes kept reverting back up to matt talking to tucker and i wanted to die.

matt came back with the drinks. his hand briefly touching off mine. “thanks.” i mumbled. “i’m going to find chris.” matt stated. “okay!” nick looked between me and violet.

i walked out of the restroom, well i was walking until my body clashed into something hard.

“what do you think your doing?” he growled. i looked at his arm, tattoos. matt.

“w-what do you mean,” i stuttered. “in that little slutty dress acting so innocent,” he closed the space between us making me back into the wall behind me. “i’m not innocent you know me well matt,” i batted my eyelashes. “stop!” he wrapped his hands around my neck, gently squeezing. “harder daddy,” i teased him, a smirk planted onto my face. matt’s hooded eyes stared down at me. “listen to me baby,” his grip got harder. “we’re gonna go out there and your going to tell everyone you don’t feel so good,” “your gonna go back to your apartment, strip naked for me and wait until i punish you okay?” his left hand soft caressed my face. i nodded my head. “okay good girl go!” he let go of me. as i walked away matt lightly slapped my ass making me turn back at scowl at him. he had a pretty smile on his face.

“happy birthday sweetie,” tucker wrapped his arms around my waist. i cringed at the pet name, was he my mom?

“thank you,” i gave him a fake smile. “i don’t feel so good sadly, im gonna have to head home, i have work tomorrow anyway,” i pulled away from his grip. “but it’s just my break now?” he furrowed his eyebrows. “im sorry, i’ll make it up to you.” that was a lie.

it wasn’t that late when i got home.

i slipped out of my dress into something more comfortable and layed on my couch until i heard that very familiar buzzer sound.

“i missed fucking you in my car,” matt pecked my lips. “well you get to fuck me in my bed, that’s even better.” i pecked his lips back. “come on, i have a surprise.” matt held his hand out.

i layed down on my bed, my eyes closed as matt told me to wait. my heart was beating fast, i didn’t know what to expect.

i opened my eyes. matt grabbed a tie from his jean pocket. “hands up,” he ordered. i nodded my head and quickly put my hands up for him. he roughly tied my hands against my head board. “this isn’t even the start baby,” he kissed me. i whimpered underneath him.

he left to find something in the kitchen.

i couldn’t see what he had but i could feel it.

a cold ice cube met my stomach. i gasped as matt ran it down my stomach. he guided it with his mouth, slowly meeting my thighs. a cry escaped me as matt moved the ice cube to my soaking sensitive flesh. he rubbed it over my clit. i didn’t know how it wasn’t melted already. i moaned as he made me even wetter. “please baby,” i managed to speak. “no i’m enjoying you like this,” he spoke from below me. i could barely look down at him from my arms being restrained. i put my head back, frustrated.

matt left again for the kitchen.

he came back with another piece of ice in his mouth, hovering over me.

this time he lowered the ice over my nipples making them suddenly get hard and point up. i tried to move for some friction but nothing was working. “matt-matt please, i’ll do anything,” i was now begging. he pulled away from me, dropping the ice cube down on the ground beside my bed.

“what should i start with first?” he scanned my body. “maaaaatttttttt!” i whined. “enough!” matt gritted his teeth. my eyes rolled into the back of my head, i was too overstimulated. my body was in so much pleasure.

matt began sucking on my soft pink nipples, slowly and softly, torturing me, going softly on purpose.

he made his way down to my soaking core, that was practically begging for him.

his middle finger coated in my juices as he pounded it into me. all i wanted was to grab him, which i couldn’t do.

“your so pretty baby,” “looking like this for me,” he positioned himself inbetween my thighs. he gave me a sweet innocent smile as he slowly ran his tongue between my folds making me scream. “i can’t do it.” i cried. the pleasure was too much, making my eyes water. “look at you,” matt pulled away from me. my juices all over his mouth and chin. “your such a mess already and i’m not even inside you.” he pulled my clit into his mouth.

matt kept my hands tied as he thrusted inside me.

he grabbed my legs and put them on his shoulders, so he could get deeper inside me. we were both a moaning mess.

i came. matt came.

“fucking ride me.” matt undid the tie around my hands and flipped me over.

i did as i was told. i rode matt like the good girl i was for him. he grabbed onto my hips and pushed me deeper inside making me lose control of the pace i was in.

less than 24 hours later.

“i know right?” tuckers hand wrapped around my waist.

matt was sending him daggers from across the room, he wasn’t staring at me. he hadn’t looked at me all night.

“thanks for the ride matt!” tucker shook matt’s hand. “of course bro,” matt mumbled.

“you coming?” tucker asked. “i left my lip liner somewhere in here, i’ll meet you inside okay?” i lied straight through my teeth. “okay, don’t be too long.” he winked which made my stomach churn.

tucker was now no longer to be seen. matt pulled me towards him. “your my dirty little secret baby, not him,” “are you gonna fuck him tonight?” he grabbed my face. i shook my head. “even if i did, i would think of you,” i gave him the most innocent look possible. “of course you would,” “enjoy your come-less sex baby, i’ll see you on friday.” he pressed a rough kiss against my lips.

i backed away and he let go of my face. i whimpered. “what’s wrong?” he titled his head.

i looked down at my skirt that was rising at my thighs. “that’s it,” “your mine now tell him to fuck off.” he kissed me hard and grabbed my waist.

sorry about it being short! i love you <333

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #smut #imagine #pov #matt sturniolo smut

[dirtybitfic]

study session

chris sturniolo x fem reader

contains- smutt, spanking,slapping ,degradation , praising, dirty talk, use of names like-slut,daddy , baby and ma

you were going over to your best friend chris's house for a study session since you both are struggling in music theory and thought it would be easier to study if you quizzed each other.

you just pulled up and made your way to the front door of him and his brothers place and texted him your outside . A minute latter the front door open and chris greets you with a warm smile as you enter and give each other a warm hug.

we're gonna study in my room since nicks trying to get some important work emails done and matt is watching tv in the living room. chris says as he leads you into the kitchen/living room down to his stares that lead to his room. You give nick a small hug from behind him as hes sitting at the kitchen table and he gives you a sweet smile and says hi. Matt gets up and gives you a hug and wishing you both good luck with studying.

Even though matt nick and chris have a great career on YouTube and are making more than enough money that they don't need to take college classes chris had brought up to you that he really wanted to start learning to produce music so you and him agreed to take music production classes online together since you also love music and think it would be fun producing music.

Okay let me start up my computer ad we can start studying the notes we took from last lecture. you say as you sit down on his bed and take out your computer from your bag and starting in them opening up to the notes you took earlier in the week.

okay you want me to quiz you first you ask him as he sits in his gaming chair at his desk and has his notes open on his computer.

sure why not he says as he spins around to face you.

you start quizzing him and he surprisingly gets all but two correct.

okay your turn he says as he faces you and goes to the next part of quiz questions to ask you.

okay go you say waiting for him to start quizzing you .

okay what tempo is house of balloons by the weekend?

ummm shit ... 98...? you say more as a question that answer

nope try again he says smiling at you reassuringly

ummm 80 yeah.. 80 you say more confidently

y/n come on your so close he says in a tone that feels slightly aggressive .

fuck off just tell me and move on to the next question you say with a slight attitude

no im not telling you ... think about it for a second then try again he snaps back. You sigh loudly and think again trying to remember.

okay... 89?

there you go good girl he said proudly smiling you finally got it . You gulp and squeeze your thighs at the way he called you a good girl.

okay what key is just like heaven in?

oh easy A major you say fully confident in your answer.

good job okay next ... what key is Rhiannon in ?

A minor

good okay next one is a bit harder... what is the bpm of A Pale by Rosalia?

shit... 140?

nope try again

150 ?

no ... again

120

no hes starting to get a little annoyed that you guessing at this point.

okay then I don't fucking know you say aggressively getting annoyed that you getting it wrong.

drop the attitude im helping you out getting aggressive with me isn't gonna get you anywhere he says deeply as his eyes darken and narrow.

whatever im tired of this I don't care anymore you say over it .

woooow giving up already so pathetic

fuck YOU chris

you know what... come here he says aggressively motioning you to come to him.

no you say huffing as you roll your eyes and challenge his dark stare.

get the fuck up and come here im not gonna tell you again y/n

you decide to just get up and go to him .

you stand in front of him as he adjusts the way he's sitting and grabs you pulling you over his lap on your stomach . You gasp in shock not expecting him to do that.

c-chris what the fuck

whe're gonna try a new system... you get the answer right you get a reward get it wrong ... you get a punishment

fine whatever you huff in annoyance his hand comes down on your ass cheeks causing you to jump in shock.

drop the fucking attitude. he bites out causing you to drop your head and sigh

okay lets try again what's the bpm of a pale?

ummm... 125 you say waiting for whatever he'll do if you're right or wrong .

he chuckles deeply before his hand comes down harshly on your ass causing you to jolt forward .

Wrong guess again . You can hear the smirk through his tone . He's enjoying this a bit too much .

ughh you groan as you think for a second trying to remember the answer. okay uhmm 123

good see I knew you would get it he says as his hands slips under your skirt and skims over your underwear then slip under them rubbing small circles on your clit. This is so fucking wrong my best friend touching me but I cant help the obvious pool of wetness that forms from his touch . Ive always thought Chris was attractive but I never acted on it wanting to repeat our friends ship and now ruin it over feelings that might not have been reciprocated . You thought as he continued the circles causing you to squirm and softly whine.

okay next one ... how many chords are in the song loser by beck?

oh one you say as your breathing picks up from his adding slightly more pressure to your clit.

correct such a good girl he coos as he slips a finger into you.

mmm you whine as he curls it hitting the right spot .

okay next ... what were all the instruments used in bittersweet symphony ? he adds another finger causing you to gasp .

u-um strings f-fuck ... guitar... mm percussion and uh-m vocals you were half moaning as you answered the question.

good girl doing so good he says in a raspy voice that has you pulsing around his fingers.

is t-that the last one you ask trying not to let out moans .

nope three more he curls his fingers hitting the spongy spot that has your legs shaking and pressure building.

okay what is the bpm oof falling in love by cigarettes after sex

his fingers move faster and you can hear the squelching sounds and the pressure built up and you knew you were close.

f-fuck i... 141 its 141 j-jesus christ you moaned out .

mmm such a smart girl aren't you he says in a sickly sweet voice that brings you even closer to the edge .

mmm you whine as you try and keep yourself from finishing.

okay next how many chords are in everlong?

ummm 10 you whine as you're squeezing his fingers so tightly your legs are shaking and your breathing is erratic.

mmm almost as close your were to cumming all over my fingers what a shame he says pulling them out and slapping your ass harshly .

you whine at the loss of his fingers and your orgasm withering away.

okay is it ... 11

yes it is . Now last one . What key is somebody told me by the killers in?

b minor

yes good job see that wasn't so bad was it he says as he rubs your back then moves his hand to your hair . He pulls it up and makes you look at him.

n-no it wasn't that bad

mmm I think you deserve a reward for how good you did . don't you?

y-yes you say as he lets go of your hair.

stand up and go lay on the bed he says in a deep tone that has you clenching around nothing.

you get off of his lap and go to the bed laying down and watch as he walks over to you slipping off his shirt in the process .

he hovers over you as he pulls you closer by your hips and latches his mouth to your neck sucking and biting leaving bruises all over .

you whine as you grab his hair and he pulls away.

take this off for me he says motioning to the tank top you're wearing .

you pulls it over your head and he watches as your tits fall out and he immediately goes down to lick and suck on your nipples as you moan and squirm under him.

he bites and pulls causing you to gasp at the stinging sensation.

he groans as you pull tightly at his hair and he comes up from your boobs as his hands moves to your skirt sliding it down your legs along with you underwear.

such a pretty girl he says as his eyes move over body taking it all in.

he moves to take his sweatpants off and you watch as they drop and you see his bulge through his boxers. You had seen his bulge in his sweatpants many times so you knew it wasn't small but goddamn he looked huge causing you to gulp.

like what you see ma he says with a condescending smirk.

shut up you say looking away a bit embarrassed he caught you staring

he grabs you by your throat making you look up at him.

no need to be embarrassed sweetheart he says causing you to squeeze your thighs around his waist .

you watch him as he lines his tip with your dripping entrance.

ready ma he asks as he slides his tip through your folds.

you nod your head and he shakes his grabbing your face with his free hand. use you're words his tone deep and laced with lust.

yes ... please chris you whine as you look up at him as a smirk forms on his face and he starts sliding in. He groans as you hiss at the stretch of him. You have no idea how much of him is in but the burn is almost too much to handle.

so fucking tight he groans as you gasp

ow fuck chris you cry out in pain.

I know baby I know he whispers as he stops moving and giving you a second to breathe

you okay he asks as he watches your face contort in discomfort.

you take a moment to breathe before you answer.

mhm j-just go slow

he starts moving again sliding in deeper he stops again to let you breathe and adjust .

just go all the way in you whine in pain as he looks down at you .

you sure he asks looking into your eyes.

y-yeah

he thrusts all the way in making you scream.

JESUS CHR- your cut off by his hand over your mouth and he shushes you.

I know it hurts baby but matt and nick are upstairs you gotta be quiet

you whine into his hand as your breathing hard and shifting uncomfortably under him.

he takes his hand off your mouth so you can speak .

y-you can move just don't go to hard you say and he starts thrusting in slowly . The stretching pain slowly goes away as he slowly thrusts in .

fuck you're so fucking wet he groans as his hips snap into your thighs and you're trying to hold in your moans but fail.

f-fuck oh my god chris you moan as he thrusts a little faster

he keep his thrusts controlled still at a slow pace waiting for you to tell him he can go harder. He's holding back not wanting to hurt you .

fuck chris be rough please you moan now in full pleasure.

you sure sweetheart I don't know if we have the same idea of rough he groans out still holding himself back.

Chris isn't one to go easy on anyone he is rough and some people he's been with in the past haven't been able to handle it and he doesn't want to do that to you.

Chris please slap me choke me I don't care be as rough as you want I can handle it

his eyes darken as a smirk comes to his face and he leans down to be by your ear.

you're gonna regret saying that ma the second those words leave his mouth he starts pounding into you so hard you scream.

CHRIS JESUS CHRIST you scream as your hand goes to his back raking your nails down his back so hard he growls and grabs you by your neck squeezing harshly.

shut the fuck up before I make you he demands in a deep husky voice that has you clenching around him.

mmm f-fuck your so d-eep you whine out as he continuously pounds into you hitting your g-spot .

yeah you see how fucking deep I am he groans as he watches the bugle in your stomach .

you look down moaning loudly watching the way your stomach bulges with each thrust.

you try and throw your head back in pleasure but he grabs your head by your hair forcing you to watch him bulging inside of you.

mhm keep fucking watching slut he says as you cry out in pleasure as you feel your orgasm building .

f-fuck i'm so close you whine out as he lets out a small chuckle as he lets go of your head and it drops back onto the bed .

he slaps you across the face twice causing you to moan loudly as your legs start shaking.

beg for it ... beg me to let you cum he growls out as he grabs you by your face making you look at him.

f-fuck please please can I cum you cry out as your holding back your orgasm until you get his permission.

mmm I don't know ... beg a little louder show me how much you want it

PLEASE you remember that he's talked about having a daddy kink and you decide nows the best time to let it slide . P-PLEASE DADDY CAN I CUM

he audibly whimpers when you call him daddy and he fucks into you rougher.

yeah you can fucking cum he groans as you let go and shake underneath him as your hearing goes out for a second.

oh my god you gasp as you come down from your high as he continuously pounds into you.

god you look so fucking hot when you cum he groans as he lifts your legs to his shoulder as he pounds deeper into you.

CHRIS AHHH he shoves his fingers in your mouth .

shut. the .fuck.up he thrusts in-between each words.

you know you have to be quiet but he's making it so hard.

he pulls his fingers out of your mouth lightly slapping your face a couple times before he grabs onto your hips thrusting into you so hard no sounds are coming out of your mouth except loud breathing.

look at you ... am I fucking you dumb hmm he says with a smirk as you whine under him .

he drops your legs and flips you over pushing your face into the bed and pulling your hips up as he pounds into from behind as you scream into the bed.

he slaps your ass hard making you moan loudly into the bed.

he continuously pounds into you as his hand continuously comes down harshly on your ass.

your screaming at this point as you reach back stopping his hand from coming down anymore as your skin is stinging from where his hand came down in the same spot each time.

he grabs you by your hair bringing you up to his chest

aww what's the matter cant handle it he says in a mocking tone .

if he weren't fucking you dumb you'd slap his across the face for that comment but all you can get out are moans and whines.

so pathetic he says as he drops your head and grabs you arms holding them behind your back with one hand as he uses his free hand to slap your other ass cheek.

mmm chris FUCK IM GONNA CUM you scream as he hits so deeply and roughly in you you're seeing stars.

come on baby cum all over my dick he groans as you let go and your legs give out as you drop down onto the bed legs shaking as you ass presses back into him.

fuck chris I c-cant you cry out as the overstimulation sees in and becomes to much

mmm mm your gonna take it like a good girl until I finish he growls out as he pounds into you as you lift your legs hitting the back of his thighs.

n-no chris I c-cant you cry out as tears fall out of the corners of your eyes.

im so close baby just a little longer he groans as his thrusts get sloppy .

uuuh my god chris please you whine out.

please what baby tell me he groans

please fuck cum in me you moan out

yeah you want me to fill you up ma he whimpers out as you feel his dick pulse inside of you.

please fuck please you whine and he breaks as his cum fills you up and he whimpers loudly in your ear

fuck y/n he groans as his thrusts stop and he slowly pulls out .

he flops down next to you as he pulls you into his chest .

Wow that was…

Really fucking good

You look at his as you both smile and laugh .

You both fall asleep with smiles on your faces

The end 💋

#fanfiction #smut #chris sturniolo

[ellephlox]

Solidarity

Summary: Frank enlists your help on a dangerous mission. Matt’s not happy about it.

Pairings: Matt x f!reader, platonic Frank Castle & f!reader, platonic Matt & Frank

Warning: Strong profanity (looking at you, Frank). Canon-typical violence. There’s also dog abuse in this, so please proceed with caution!

“You will not believe how terrible my day was.” You were already complaining aloud as you started up the stairs to Matt’s apartment, perfectly aware that he’d be able to hear you. “My boss gave me triple the amount of work that’s humanly possible to complete within a month and somehow he expects me to do it within a week. And then he had the audacity to tell me that I shouldn’t wear my hair in a ponytail because it’s ‘too informal’ for the face of the company. I mean, what the hell does that even mean?”

One of Matt’s neighbors opened their apartment door as you marched up the steps, and you quickly lifted your phone to your ear as though you were talking to someone, lest they think you were just talking to yourself. “And then my coworker took my data — you know, all that stuff I had been inputting onto that Google Doc the other day? And he presented it as his own, no credit to me. I can’t even report him because he’s supposed to retire in a week so it’s pointless anyway.” 

You continued to gripe as you unlocked the door, chucking your keys down and tossing your shoes off so violently that they hit the wall. “Anyway, I’m in a bad mood now, so I have two propositions — well, demands, I guess — for you. One: We watch Jeopardy tonight. In pajamas. I will object if you’re still wearing a tie.” You unzipped your coat and tossed it haphazardly onto the coat rack. “Two: My friend asked if we’ve ever showered together before — you know, typical girl talk questions — and I told her we hadn’t, so I was thinking—” You stopped dead as you entered the living room, your stomach plummeting. Leaning on the wall by the window, arms crossed, was Matt, wearing his devil suit, complete with the helmet on and his billy clubs dangling in his hands. And across from him, standing with an actual gun in his hand, was Frank Castle. Mortification sent heat into your face, and for a moment you just stood there, at a loss for words. 

“We have company,” Matt said dryly, uncrossing his arms and standing up straight.

“I can see that,” you said finally. “You didn’t think to... I don’t know, shoot a text warning me?” Your cheeks were searing; had you seriously just proposed showering with Matt in front of the Punisher, of all people? 

“I was a bit preoccupied all day with making sure Trigger Happy over here didn’t shoot anyone,” Matt said, his jaw tense. 

Frank snorted. “Red, you’d be bleeding out in an alley if I hadn’t saved your ass. Get off your high horse.”

“Yeah. Okay. But you couldn’t have said something, anything at all, when I walked in?  Like, ‘Hey, honey, there’s a wanted fugitive standing in our living room, just so you know.’ Sorry, Mr. Castle,” you added in an undertone to him. “Um — I’m not trying to make you feel unwelcome or anything, I just feel a bit awkward about earlier, so—”

“Doesn’t matter,” Frank said shortly, his gaze still trained on Matt. “We gonna stand here with your girl watching us and argue all afternoon? Or are we going to get this done?”

“Get what done?” you asked.

It was Frank who answered, and from the way Matt was standing with his back straight as a ruler now, you had the sense he wasn’t pleased, for whatever reason. “There’s a shipment of heroin that’s supposed to arrive tonight. The dealers have been selling to kids on the street to make a quick buck.”

“It’s due to come in at midnight,” Matt said. “But the source I talked to last night doesn’t know which dock.”

You made of sound of sympathy. “I take it you’ll be having to sweep a lot of territory tonight, then?”

“That’s a damn understatement,” Frank said. “We’re not just talking about the docks in Hell’s Kitchen, ma’am. We’re talking all the way down to Chelsea, and the piers in Brooklyn Heights.”

“But that’s impossible to scope out,” you said slowly. “Even if Matt’s standing in the center of all the docks in Hell’s Kitchen, he couldn’t possibly hear all the way down to Chelsea, let alone Brooklyn.”

“Which is why we’re in for a rough night,” Matt said. “I called Jessica, Luke, and Danny. They’re all out of town.” He jutted his chin at Frank. “And that’s why we’re here together.”

“I ain’t happy about it either,” Frank added. “He’s already talking my ass off about moral obligation and shit. Feels like I’m in church.”

"Because you tried to stab the guy in the throat after he gave us information we needed.”

“If you could see, Red, then you’d know from the look in that guy’s eyes that he planned on murdering us the second that we turned our backs on him—”

“Which is why I tied him up and left him for Mahoney.”

“I have a better idea,” you said, cutting in before anything could escalate. “I can help.” 

Matt’s response was immediate and scathing. “No.”

"Oh, come on — I get it if you want to do your whole ‘Fly home, Buddy, I work alone’ thing, but you’re not working alone, you’re working with the Punish— I mean, Mr. Castle. I’ll be supremely insulted forever if you don’t let me help.”

“If you think that I’ll let those dealers anywhere near you—” Matt began, but you interrupted again.

“Look, I’ve always waited here patiently and uselessly while you do your deviling every night, but can’t you give me a chance? Maybe we’ll be a dream team. Terrific trio. Second Edition Avengers. The Scooby gang minus a talking dog.”

“She could help, Red,” Frank said, sending an unreadable look in your direction. “I say we do it. She can camp out at Brooklyn. I mean, the guy said that they could dock there, but they never have before. Odds are they’ll be in Chelsea or Hell’s Kitchen.”

“So, what? We throw her to the wolves in Brooklyn where we can’t get to her easily if things go south?” Matt looked as though he were about two seconds from socking Frank in the jaw. Or worse, two seconds from handcuffing you to the apartment so that you wouldn’t leave. 

“No,” you said firmly. “Things won’t go south. Matt, I’m not going to... I don’t know, engage in a fight with them. I’m not a vigilante. I’ll just hide and keep an eye on the docks, then if they show up, I’ll call you.”

“I’ll stay in Chelsea,” Frank said. “I know you get all weird about the Kitchen, Red, so it’s all yours.”

Matt was standing stock still, grinding his teeth. Finally he ground out, “It’s too dangerous.”

“So is driving a car. So is crossing the street. And yet I’ve done both many, many times,” you said. “I’ll be completely fine. Why would dealers have any reason to go after a random passerby, even if they did see me? Which they won’t,” you added hurriedly. “Because I’ll stay safely out of sight.”

“Perfect.” Frank checked his watch. “I ain’t staying here while we twiddle our thumbs and wait for midnight to roll around. Give Y/N my burner number, Red.”

“I’d never have thought you’d do this, Frank,” Matt said, his voice low. “I thought you at least were on my side when it came to keeping people safe who—”

“Who are what?” you said sharply. “I might not have... superpowers, or, I don’t know, a weird bloodthirstiness — sorry again, Mr. Castle — but I can still help.”

“Call me Frank.” Frank leveled his gaze at you. “And cut the apologizing shit.”

“Uh. Okay.” You had to bite your tongue to keep from apologizing again.

And, somehow, you actually ended up on the mission. You took the C train down to Brooklyn Heights after enduring a very long and very dry lecture from Matt on how you were to stay out of sight no matter what and to call him should any boat arrive with men wearing ski masks. 

And, in all honesty, you weren’t nervous. The likelihood of the dealers showing up at your assigned docks was slim. And even if they did, you’d just have to make a quick phone call to both of them, and then camp out. Easy-peasy. 

You settled in on a wooden bench overlooking the piers, wishing you had worn more than your jacket. The temperature had dropped more than expected when the sun had set, and now you shivered slightly, the cold metal of a knife against your thigh. Just in case. 

How exactly you were actually out here, on a real mission, with Matt willingly letting you out of his protection, you weren’t sure. It was exhilarating, though. The city was dark, yet not really; it was aglow with the street lamps and headlights and apartment windows whose blinds hadn’t been closed yet. You scrunched up your legs to conserve body heat and regretted not bringing a blanket, too. And a pillow. That would’ve made the bench slightly less rock hard against your bottom. 

Seriously, how did Matt do this kind of thing every night? Fifteen minutes in and you were already missing the warmth of home. 

You glanced at the skyline. Somewhere, on the other side of those skyscrapers, Matt was waiting as well. Probably he wasn’t curled up on a bench like you were, though. It was more likely that he’d be stalking the rooftops, or pacing in the shadows. 

And then movement caught your eye, at just after 12:30 in the morning. You scrambled to your feet, squinting in the dark. It was a boat, fast approaching the pier just next to you. 

No way. Yeah, you were on lookout, but somehow you’d convinced yourself that the dealers wouldn’t actually show up on your end. You waited to call Frank and Matt, though, because in case it was a different boat, you didn’t want to raise a false alarm. You moved away from your bench and began walking leisurely down the pier, as though you were going for a nighttime stroll. All you needed to do was get a good glimpse of them, then you’d head up the street where you could watch from a safer spot. 

“In, out! Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” someone said, a bit loudly, from the deck of the ship. You swiveled your head to see him, and sure enough, he had a ski mask. Swiftly you pulled out your phone and fire off a quick text to both Matt and Frank. You were about to leave the pier altogether when a bark made you stop short. 

....A dog?

“Shut the bitch up!” one of the men snarled. “We get caught, then all the goods get seized.”

“She’s been fucking howling the whole way, what am I supposed to do?”

“Give her a piece of food.”

“What food? You ate the rest of it, man.”

“Can’t believe we’re bringing this dog anyway. Boss already has six bitches. Why does he need another?”

“She’s some special breed, or some shit, I don’t know. Sells for a thousand bucks a pop. Grab that box. Like I said — in, out. We’re already late.”

The dog kept barking, though, and you winced as the man kicked the poor thing in the ribs. Piece of shit. You wanted to go up there and throttle him yourself. If Matt or Frank would just get here already, then you’d be able to relax, but it would still be at least twenty minutes...

And what if the dealers got away in that time frame?

The dog started barking again, and suddenly, without any word of warning, one of the men picked the dog up like a sack of potatoes and threw her overboard. “To hell with the extra cash. That’s how you deal with security problems,” you heard him say as he wiped his hands on his pants. “Get moving, go, go, go! Unload this shit so we can get out of here!”

Below, the dog’s frantic head slipped below the surface.

Oh, hell no. 

Your feet were moving even before you could make an executive decision in your mind. The cold of the evening was forgotten, as were Matt’s strict words to not be seen, no matter what happens, and you dove into the water, where the dog had fell beneath the black waves beside the pier. 

Fortunately, it was summer, and as shockingly cold as the water was, it wasn’t anywhere near deathly cold. You couldn’t see anything, and desperately tried to listen for the dog, but you didn’t have Matt’s ears, and for a moment panic swelled inside you that this dog would drown, and you wouldn’t be able to do a thing. 

And then you saw movement, out of the corner of your eye. The dog was struggling to stay afloat, her snout barely making it out of the water. You grabbed her around the middle and kicked with all your might, coughing on water and unable to see hardly anything except for the blurry outline of the pier. There had to be a ladder somewhere along there, and you groped blindly along the edge, seeking out a grip to pull yourself and the dog up. 

For a moment, you completely forgot about the dealers behind you. All you could think about was getting the dog safely onto land, and with a massive effort you lifted her up. Her paws scrambled against the edge of the pier, but with a good shove to her rump, she was able to get over the edge and dash away into the shadows. 

Good luck out there, doggie. You started to climb the ladder yourself, but froze when you heard the telltale click of a gun being cocked in front of you. Slowly you looked up, your blood running cold at the sight of a gun pointed straight at your forehead. The man holding it had his hair tied back in a bun, and there was a horrible expression on his face that told you he wouldn’t have any qualms about pulling the trigger. 

“Should I shoot, boss?” he asked, his eyes not moving from your face. “Stupid girl’s seen us. She’ll probably run her mouth and tell the cops.”

Your brain felt as though it were short-circuiting. “I swear, I won’t tell a soul. You have my word. Really, I’ll just leave here, and I promise—”

“Do it!” one of the men shouted from the boat. “Get it done so you can get your ass back up here to help. You know how many bodies there are in the Upper Bay? She’ll just be another.”

Your heart was punching the inside of your rib cage. You considered falling backwards to try to swim away, but what good would it do? There was no other way to get back onto land nearby except for this ladder, and you didn’t trust yourself to swim around the boat and across to the next pier without simply getting shot en route. Lunging up the rest of the ladder to fight him was an even worse option. Even if you could fight like Matt (which you could safely say was not the case), you were at a disadvantage; he had the high ground. 

But you didn’t have a choice. The man lunged down and grabbed you by the collar of your jacket, hoisting you up onto the pier. You shivered violently, unsure of whether it was from fear or cold. The man looked you over. “Could hold her for ransom, Tom. That’d bring in some extra cash.”

“No.” The man, who must’ve been Tom, shook his head. “That’s just a surefire way to get attention from the cops. Let’s take her in. We’ll kill her once we’re back on open water and dump her body in the Atlantic. Much cleaner that way.”

The man holding you grunted in agreement and shoved you forward up the ramp to the boat. You obeyed only because of the gun pressed against your temple, feeling like you might vomit any second. 

Where are Matt and Frank? The night was as still as a reflecting pool. It was as though the city itself had gone to sleep, abandoning you to these men, and you had to choke down the rising lump in your throat that was making you feel like you might cry any second or pass out. But tears wouldn’t come, as you were led into a cabin, your mouth promptly duct-taped closed. The sensation made you panic even more — a little air could get through to your nose, but not much, and the sudden feeling of being near to asphyxiation made you even more light-headed. 

The men, however, seemed to forget about you as soon as they tied you to the chair. That they hadn’t killed you immediately was the most relieving of mercies, and you struggled fruitlessly to escape your bonds, feeling supremely useless. Surely Matt would arrive any second; he would hear exactly where you were, you reasoned, and he’d make his way to you as soon as he could. Any minute you’d hear the sound of a baton ricocheting off some unfortunate skulls or the cracking as bones shattered under his fists. 

But instead, it was bullets you heard first. Frank. You gritted your teeth, hearing the shouts of men that were surely being killed without a second thought. Hopping with your feet, you were able to wiggle your chair forward slightly until you could see outside the cabin door. Frank’s silhouette was a menacing shape against the moonlight. 

Where is Matt?

One of the largest men — Tom, you recalled — suddenly came barreling into the room, a gun in his hand. He untied you violently, yanking the rope so roughly against your wrists that you gasped under the tape, and then dragged you forward, the gun against your head. Unceremoniously you were toppled from the chair, your knees slamming down onto hard wood. 

“Drop your gun!” Tom jabbed his gun against your forehead so hard that you saw stars. “Drop it now and put your hands behind your head, or I’ll blow her brains out!”

Through your fuzzy vision you saw Frank freeze. His gaze was cold; calculating, and for the first time you wondered what your value was in Frank’s mind, compared to the triumph of offing some criminals. Which was worth more to him? For a moment, you feared he would prioritize killing the smugglers. His fist clenched even tighter around the gun, and he drew in level breaths, without lowering his gaze for even a second. 

“I swear to God I’m pulling this trigger in ten seconds if you don’t drop it,” Tom said, and he dragged the tip of the gun so that it was placed precisely against your temple. Water was still dripping from your clothing and goosebumps were raised so violently on your skin that you felt like you had chicken pox, but that was nothing compared to the electric adrenaline shooting down your spine, as though your nervous system was screaming at you to do something, anything, but it was to no avail; all you could do was stay on your knees, as still as possible, and keep your head lowered. 

And then, as though he’d made a snap decision, Frank set the gun down.

“Kick it over here,” Tom ordered. 

Frank obeyed, slowly raising his hands to his head. “The gun’s down,” he said. “Now let her go.”

Tom’s grip on you tightened. “You’re a fool,” he said, and suddenly you knew what was about to happen, from the steadying of his hands and the firmer press of the gun against your temple. You wrenched yourself away from him, just as the bullet fired off, and the heat of it barely grazed your shoulder as you dove away. 

The victory was short-lived, though. Tom aimed again, and this time you were on the ground, with nowhere to go. You screwed your eyes shut, sending a silent apology to Matt, and...

The bullet never came. 

Gingerly you opened your eyes to see the devil punching Tom with all his wrath and fury. Frank had already picked up his gun again and was running towards the back of the boat, where you knew there were still a few more crew members. Quickly you crawled backwards to get out of the path of Matt and Tom, the latter of whom was being thrown against the cabin wall. 

That had been close. Way, way too close. You fumbled for the duct tape and ripped it off your mouth, lightheaded from breathing irregularly. Stars formed in front of your vision and you had to slow yourself down, drawing in air and then releasing it slowly. 

Matt was still slamming his fist into the face of Tom, and blood was spurting everywhere. You squinted at them, your heart dropping — far too much blood was spraying out, and Matt was showing no signs of slowing down —

“It’s okay. You’ve got him,” you whispered, the words coming out of your mouth in a rasp. “Matt.”

Matt dropped Tom, who slid to the ground, unconscious. Using the edge of the boat to support yourself, you stood up slowly, and limped over to Matt; your knees were still aching from earlier. Gently you reached towards his shoulders. “I can call 911.”

“He deserves to die.”

“Maybe. Maybe not,” you said. Matt was in a dangerous anger, you could tell; one wrong move and he’d do something he’d regret for the rest of his life. Choosing the right words now was imperative. “A judge will decide that.”

“He tried to kill you,” Matt snapped, whirling around and knocking your arm off his shoulder. “If he had — if he’d succeeded—”

“But he didn’t.”

“Does that matter?”

You opened your mouth to respond, but Frank got there first. “Cool down, Red,” he said, as nonchalantly as though you were all at dinner together. “Your girl’s safe. We got the drugs before they could get shipped.”

“Don’t talk to me like I need to be calmed down,” Matt said, his voice hardly more than a snarl. 

Frank stared at Matt for a few moments. “Yeah,” he said quietly. “To answer your question. It does matter that he tried killing her.” Then, without warning, he shot Tom, square in the forehead. You yelped, looking away from the bloody hole where his head was now caved in. His features were unrecognizable, and hollow in death, and yet you couldn’t help looking back at him, his eyes meeting yours as though he still were alive. 

“Get her out of here. Warm her up,” Frank said, nodding at you. “I’ve got other business to do this evening.”

“Other business?” you asked, but Matt was reaching for you, skating his hands over your body. 

“Sorry,” you said lamely, shaking slightly from the adrenaline. “I sort of disobeyed the only rule.”

“You could have died.”

“But there was a dog, and I had to save it — they tossed the poor thing overboard. I couldn’t just sit by.”

And, to your surprise, Matt’s lips cracked into a small smile. Though you couldn’t see his eyes under the mask, you could feel his warmth. “Yeah. I know the feeling.”

Frank was gone already. Together, you and Matt exited the boat, and it took all of your willpower to not look back at the corpse. 

“So,” you said, taking Matt’s hand as you walked down the dark street together. The feeling of the duct tape was lingering on your mouth, and the way that you had been tied up — the gun against your head — and it was making your heart race. Even though Matt would see right through you (hear right through you?), you adopted a casual tone. “How was my audition? Can I officially be the Assistant Daredevil?”

“You’re deflecting.”

“I’m not deflecting. I’m just wondering if I passed some sort of test, and if you’ll let me join you now—”

“Sweetheart.” Matt stopped short and pulled you into the shadows between buildings. “You’re not fooling me.”

“I’m not trying to fool you.” Your mouth was dry. 

“That was intense. You don’t have to pretend it wasn’t. You could’ve died.” Matt’s voice shook a bit, and you were reminded that as terrifying as it was for you, it had probably been even worse for Matt. Because if you had died, and it was technically on his watch... yeah. That wouldn’t have gone over well. 

You cupped his face, and he leaned into it slightly. “Okay. I’m a bit freaked out. But I’m okay.”

“Who’s reassuring who, now?” he said after a moment, and that warm, small smile returned. He pulled you in closer, wrapping his arms around you tightly enough that you had to draw in a short breath. 

“Maybe...” Your voice came out in a whisper. “Maybe we both need it tonight.” 

A/N: Sorry for the slightly rushed ending but this was beginning to expand a bit too much and I didn’t want it to feel like it should have multiple chapters. Honestly, I wasn’t happy with this piece so it’s been sitting in my drafts for about a year now, but it’s been awhile since I posted a one shot, so... here we are.

Hope you all had a great day, thanks so much for reading! 

-Elle

#daredevil #matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #marvel #daredevil x reader #reader insert #reader #mcu #x reader #matt murdock x fem!reader #frank castle #frank castle x reader #the punisher #the punisher x reader

[goldenlikedayl1ght]

peace - m. murdock

a/n: hi guys! missed you. desperately wanted to write more hoh!reader, so i did it. this can be read on it's own, OR it can be read as a part two to my fic, 'the lakes', which you can read here! feedback always appreciated! <3 warnings: so much damn fluff, suggestive behaviors, like literally tooth rotting fluff! mentions of some abelism but nothing actually happens it's just sort of mentioned. matt hates buffalo chicken pizza, the cold hurts readers ears, also a lot of kissin' and tinnitus because of course there is. word count: 3.0k summary: tinnitus, buffalo chicken pizza, and objections. what more can you ask for from matt murdock? paring: matt murdock x hoh!reader now playing: peace - taylor swift "the devils in the details/but you got a friend in me/would be enough if i could never give you peace?"

There are things that no one teaches you about dating.  

There are things that no one teaches you about dating Matt Murdock, a blind man.

There are things that no one teaches you about dating Matt Murdock, a blind man, who has super senses and is also a vigilante.

There are things that no one teaches you about dating Matt Murdock, a blind man, who has super senses and is also a vigilante… while also being deaf.

As you lost your hearing, you knew dating would be difficult. That was never a secret. Your first girlfriend after you started wearing hearing aids once hid them from you as a punishment after an argument. Safe to say that relationship didn’t last long.

One time, you went on a date with a guy who asked in the middle of your dinner, ‘Could you please take off your headphones? It’s cool that they’re Bluetooth but it’s really rude.’ You did not make it to dessert.

Then there was the time that your ex-boyfriend thought you were talking about him in ASL to your mom in front of him. You broke up with him soon after.

And Matt has experienced his fair share of ableism in dating too—Women who thought they could get away with stealing from him because he was blind, or that thought that he just had to have a service dog, and he’d be so cute with one.

So, when you started dating each other, things were obviously different. You weren’t sure how, but the idea of dating another person with a disability never occurred to you. Maybe it was because of how often you found people playing oppression Olympics, a classic game of ‘who has it worse?’ a game you had no interest in playing.

And the struggles you and Matt have in your relationship are never ones represented in rom-coms or in romantic novels. Dating any blind man would have been hardly represented but Matt, with his charm and heightened senses, was completely uncharted waters. And yet, you dive in headfirst.

One of the most romantic things Matt does for you within the first six months of your relationship happens on a cold February day. Winter in New York isn’t over until at least March, so you walk home from work, arm in arm. You decide to stop in for Thai food but decide to stand outside in favor of in the crowded restaurant where Matt would be hearing too many things and you wouldn’t be hearing nearly enough.

But he notices, as he often does, how you squirm in discomfort, waiting for time to pass. Though you do not show it in your face, he hears it in the way you breath deeply to try and relax through whatever it is that’s bothering you. He notices the grip on his arm tightening, even just a bit.

“What’s wrong, bee?” You’re never getting over your fondness for the nickname. But you stay quiet for a second, because you know he can tell if you’re lying.

“My ears hurt.” You hate saying it, because you feel like it’s all you do—yap about your ears and how much they hurt. They hurt from talking on the phone and holding it up to your ear for so long. They hurt from being in loud environments like parties and bars. But dear god, do they hurt right now. And you know exactly why.

“Oh, is it too loud? We could move to a different spot,” he says softly but you shake your head.

“Uh.. No. It’s cold. The cold is bothering my ears.” You explain, and he just nods. But before he can respond, you continue, “They’re in pain when it’s cold and earmuffs don’t do anything except block out sound and I can’t hear anyways, negating the point of my hearing aids.” You’ve tried earmuffs time and time again. And usually, you’d just wear a beanie or something, but you forgot yours.

So, Matt thinks for a moment, before tucking his cane under his arm, before lifting his hands to come up to your face. The heel of his hand comes up to rest against your cheeks while the length of his fingers gently cup around your ears. He’s not pressing down, making it harder to hear, but your ears are immediately warmer. Matt’s hands—and well, everything, are naturally very warm and the leather gloves he has on makes it even more so.

Your face flushes, as you lean into his touch. What a man you have found yourself. You stay like this for a little while, until your food is ready. Your face turns and you plant a gentle kiss to the palm of his hand.

As you leave the restaurant after grabbing your food, you want to say one more thing. Just quickly.

“Thanks for helping, by the way.. I’m sorry I constantly complain about my ears.” You tell him, and he just gets this goofy grin on his face.

“At least you’re not blind. That would suck.” He links his arm with yours. You just laugh, leaning against him.

“Shut up,” and at this request, he scoffs.

“You love listening to me talk, it’s one of your favorite things ever!” he defends.

You just grin because your boyfriend can tell when you’re lying. And you know anything other than telling him that what he said was true would be the biggest lie you ever told.

...

It’s not all sunshine and rainbows with Matt, though.

Okay, maybe that’s sort of dramatic. Neither of you are particularly violent nor angry, but one time you get really heated.

Your time working with Nelson, Murdock & Page is wonderful, and because it’s just the four of you, often, you wind up getting lunch together. Someone runs out, grabs food, and you all sit in the conference room, talk and eat.

But today, you barely made it to lunch.

“Where do you guys wanna eat today?” Foggy asks, leaning against your doorway. He knows Matt can hear him from wherever, but you need him to be in the room to be able to decode what he’s saying. Karen leans against the desk in the main part of the office.

“Pizza?” You shrug, and Matt calls from his office,

“Sounds good!”

“Great. What do you guys want?” He asks.

“I’m really in the mood for buffalo chicken pizza, I dunno why.” You shrug. Matt’s footsteps echo through the office, before he’s in your doorway as well.

“What the fuck did you just say?”

You gaze at him, perplexed.

“Uh… I want buffalo chicken pizza?”

“Honey, You cannot be serious.”

“What is your problem, Matthew?” You laugh, but he looks disgusted.

“You are a New York native! How can you enjoy something as blasphemous as wanting buffalo chicken pizza?” He asks, and Foggy just laughs.

“Dude, no way. You can’t be discriminatory towards pizza.” Then, Karen speaks up.

“No, you can’t. Not technically. But I most definitely am. Buffalo chicken pizza ruins the point of pizza!”

Then, you go to defend yourself.

“The point of Pizza is to enjoy it! And I enjoy buffalo chicken pizza!”

“Well, you’re enjoying pizza wrong!”

“You can’t enjoy pizza incorrectly!”

At this point, Foggy is just giggling, “I can’t breathe,” He wheezes.

Now, you stand and leave your desk, going into the main part of the office.

“Where are you going?” Matt asks.

“I don’t need to be berated about my pizza preferences in my own office by my own boyfriend!”

“I have a valid excuse; I can taste all the ingredients of buffalo chicken pizza and it’s disgusting!”

“It’s not my fault you’re a freak with crazy senses!”

Matt gasps, “Bee, you wound me!”

“Do not use that nickname with me, Matthew!” You tell him, “That’s a low blow!”

“Why, just because I think your pizza choices are awful doesn’t mean I don’t still love you, Sweetheart! Your pizza preference is just inexcusable, and I think you need to accept that—”

“You know what?”

“What?”

Your hands come up to your ears, quickly turning your hearing aids off and taking them off, putting it on a nearby desk.

Though you cannot hear, Foggy and Karen’s face tells you that they are dying of laughter, and Matt has this offended look on his face when he realizes he no longer hears the familiar buzzing of your hearing aids.

This is how you spend your day. You sit at your desk, hungry, as your boyfriend yaps by your doorway. You know he’s asking you to put your hearing aids in or telling you that your pizza request is dumb, you can just sort of make out what he’s saying by the movement of his lips.

But you do not budge, and by the time it’s time to go back to his apartment, you simply slip on your coat and wait for him to meet you by the door. He has given up trying to talk to you, for the most part. But the silent treatment is killing him. Even when you get to his apartment, he’s left speechless as you silently retreat into his bedroom, stealing some clothes and going to lay down.

Honestly, though? The worst part isn’t the silent treatment or ignoring him, but it’s the fact that he knows your ears ring even worse when you walk through the city without your hearing aids on. He knows you’re in pain. It’s killing him because you’re trying not to show it, but he can tell you’re clenching your jaw and burying your head beneath his pillow. You’re trying to rely on the softness of his sheets and the faint smell of him lingering between the sheets.

So, he devises a plan. And every minute he waits for the plan to be carried out is torture because he knows you’re too stubborn to forfeit your opinion on buffalo chicken pizza. When he is finally able to give you an apology you truly deserve, he grabs your hearing aids off the coffee table and crawls into bed behind you. You feel the bed dip but don’t say anything.

He plants a soft kiss to your hand, beginning to trail kisses up your arm and shoulder. He kisses your neck, and then jaw. You glance back over to him, seeing the hearing aids in his hand. You take them from him and put them on, before turning them on. He grins at the familiar humming they create at a frequency that will not bother you.

“Still mad at me, bee?” He asks, kissing your shoulder again. You shrug.

“Mad is a strong word, but yes.”

“Let me make it up to you?”

“Fine, but only because you’re cute.” He likes this answer. He takes your hand and pulls you off the bed, taking you to the kitchen. And you smell.. Pizza. There’s a box from your favorite place, and you step away from him to open the box. It’s a half plain pie and a half buffalo chicken pie. Because no matter how much he disagrees with you, he just wants you to talk to him and not be in so much pain for the sake of winning an argument.

You turn your head and place a soft kiss to his cheek. He tilts his head and places a soft kiss to your lips.

“Am I forgiven, bee?”

“I think so, Matty.” You hum.

He grins and kisses you again, thrilled to sense your more relaxed posture now.

...

Another challenge of your relationship comes from being lawyers. Mostly since you’re both ridiculously stubborn. You have a fun game you like to play out of it, though.

This one time you play, you’re laying with him on his couch, listening to music when you start yapping.

“I think I might style my hair a different way,” you tell him, but he just shrugs and plays with your hair.

“I think you look gorgeous either way.”

You furrow your brows for a second, and his face splits into a grin since he knows what’s coming.

“Objection,” you start, “You’re blind, you have no actual way of telling if I’m conventionally attractive.”

He considers this for a second.

“Overruled,” He determines, “Beauty is subjective, and in my opinion, you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever known.” Your face flushes.

“Objection,” You start again, and he groans, knowing you won’t let it go, “You don’t need to flirt with me, I already want you.”

“Overruled,” He counters again, quicker this time, “I like flirting with you, and it keeps the spark alive. Plus, I like making you blush.”

You raise an eyebrow, and he knows what’s coming next.

“Objection,” You hum, “How could you possibly know I’m blushing?”

He simply moves his hands from your hair and rests them against your cheeks, before deciding.

“Overruled.”

There’s another time that you’re at Josie’s, and you want to talk to Karen about a surprise you’re planning for his birthday, but he’s sitting right there, so you start signing. And he knows you’re signing by the way your hands smack, and the air moves through your fingers.

“Objection,” He groans, “I can’t understand what you’re talking about!”

“Mm, Overruled,” You determine, “There are some things I’m allowed to keep from you, but you have super senses and can tell when I’m lying and can hear me from a long distance away. Signing is the only way to have things be confidential.”

He raises an eyebrow.

“Okay, objection—You aren’t supposed to keep secrets from your partner.”

“Overruled.” You tell him. “One, that’s something people say about wedded spouses, ask me to marry you, get a marriage certificate and show me a nice ring then we’ll talk,” He blushes at that, “Two, you have an unhealthy idea of relationships from past relationships. You’re in therapy for a reason.”

Matt nods.

“Okay, okay.” He sighs, “That’s fair.” You grin at this.

“See? Was it so hard to let me win, Counselor?”

He raises an eyebrow.

“Yes, it was, Counselor.” He tells you, but you just giggle, because you love being a lawyer and you love your boyfriend.

But this last time is your favorite.

You spent the night drinking at Marci and Foggy’s, but there was this tension between you and Matt, and you can hardly wait to get home. So at some point, you make a half assed excuse, mumbling something about how your hearing aid batteries are low, but whatever it was that you told them as an excuse, you don’t really care.

Because now you’re on your bed, Matt pressed against you as he kisses down your neck. His teeth graze against your skin, and you gasp when he bites down, leaving a large mark on your neck.

Then, Matt, horny and a little tipsy, goes,

“Objection, I thought I told you to be quiet.” He continues to kiss your neck, jumping from side to side, leaving marks here and there.

“Overruled, I’m deaf, I can’t tell how loud I’m being,” You hum, your fingers lacing into his hair. He hums and kisses your collarbone before he speaks again.

“Objection,”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Matt—”

He shushes you softly before kissing you.

“Ssh… It’s listening time, sweetheart,” Okay, that was hot, “Objection,” He starts again, “You can be quiet for me, I know you can. I know you can follow orders, baby.” He then kisses your neck again.

“Overruled,” You start, tugging on his hair a bit. “You decided to play our game while knowing I’m at your mercy. It’s an abuse of power.”

“An abuse of—” he half scoffs, half chuckles. “You know what, Sweetheart?”

“What, Matty?”

“Objection. Be quiet or I’ll stop.”

Damn. An ultimatum. You knew that in situations like these, Matt’s willpower is stronger than yours.

“Sustained.”

“There we go, bee, was that so hard?”

...

The real best part of dating Matt Murdock, a blind lawyer with super senses while being deaf?

Well..

It starts on a warm sunny Sunday morning. You’re laying in bed, the sun peeking through its curtains. You’re laying on your stomach, face smooshed against pillows as he stretches out beside you. In another life, your dear boyfriend was a cat.

You don’t have your hearing aids in yet. It’s too early. Plus, you’re just enjoying the look of Matt basking in the warmth of the light. He’s gorgeous, your boy.

You lean forward and gently kiss the corner of his eyes, squeezed shut as he stretches. He stops when he feels your lips against his skin, smiling softly. He says good morning, but you can’t really hear him, so you just take his hand and press a kiss to his skin there too.

He returns the favor later, as you’re pouring your coffee. He presses a soft kiss to your ear, and you grin, resting your body against his He presses another kiss to your other ear. It’s something small, but it thrills you.

Matt is gentle with you in a way that you’re not used to. It’s not the sort of gentleness that comes with most people, where they’re afraid of breaking you because of your being deaf, but it’s a gentleness that comes despite it.

You enjoy bathing in his affection, especially because he is just so willing to give it to you and while it should be something you’re used to, you’re not. But you’re getting there. Matt makes sure of it.

The pair of you just seem to find the darkest cracks and crevices of the other, and you love those parts dearly.

You begin to kiss the corner of his eyes more often, and it quickly replaces his jaw as your favorite place to kiss. And your ears, despite how much pain and suffering they provide to you, Matt is a big fan of just kissing them.

So, when he leans forward and kisses your ears, you lean over to him and kiss the corners of his eyes. The way he squeezes his eyes shut at the affection is pretty adorable. It’s always awful when he must slip on those red glasses that hide those pretty eyes.

“Objection,” you groan.

He places a soft kiss to the top of your ear.

“Overruled.”

#matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x y/n #matt murdock x you #daredevil #daredevil fic #matt murdock fic #daredevil fanfiction #matt murdock fluff #matt murdock x hoh!reader #deaf!reader #hoh!reader #matt murdock x gn!reader #gn!reader

[to-thelakes]

tear in my heart (1)

pairing; frank castle x fem!reader

series summary; when you start on anti-depressants, you didn’t expect to be forced on a roadtrip with the punisher but life never really went how you wanted it to.

series warnings; slow-burn, discussion of depression and reader being on medication, angst, fluff, strangers to reluctant friends to friends to lovers, reader sleeps a lot, reader is emotionally all over the place, frank is his usual self

warnings for this part; description of a fight, reader is a little hungover, mentions of a night-out/drinking alcohol, strong language, men being creepy (not matt or frank)

masterlist

If you were completely honest with yourself, you don’t know why you had come into work. You were exhausted. You had only started the anti-depressants two days ago and you were exhausted. Also, you had a tiny hangover. You weren’t really supposed to drink on your meds but you never really listened to what anyone else said. You were regretting it now that you had a pounding headache and were stuck on shift until closing.

Going out had meant to be just some fun. You weren’t gonna drink but then these attractive men came up to you and they were buying you drinks and you didn’t know how to say no. The night had gone downhill from there but thankfully your roommate had helped you into bed when you returned back to your shared apartment.

It should have been a night that you regretted but didn’t have to think about again. Or at least that’s what you had hoped but as you walked through the bookstore, you heard the bell ding.

The bookshop you worked in was only a few blocks from your apartment. You had worked there long enough to know all the regulars and they knew you. It paid well considering and the owner loved you. He loved to tease you about anything and everything and his smile was one that brought you so much comfort. It reminded you of your dad’s smile even when your dad was halfway across the country, out of reach.

Despite all this, when you glanced up from where you were stocking books on the shelf, you saw a newcomer - not a regular - as he meandered down one of the aisles, blurry images of the previous night started to come back to you. 

He hadn’t immediately spotted you but he would any minute and you knew his face. It was one of the men that you had been drinking with last night and you felt your heart thumping in your chest. It had to be a coincidence that they were here. You tried not to think too much as you continued stocking up the YA section.

The man had been the one that had initially approached you the previous night. He had been charming and suave. He had made you feel special and so even when you were hesitant at the start, you settled into his presence quite comfortably. And when he had asked for you to join him at the table with his friends, you found it hard to say no.  He had been so kind. It was rare to find someone so openly charming and endearing without being overly sexual but he was and you had joined it.

Which as it turned out, was a bad idea. It turned out - according to Matt - that in your drunken state, you had managed to find yourself wedged between criminals. Criminals that were part of a drug ring that Matt had been trying to take down for months. Of course, Matt had only told you this once he had demanded that you get away from them and made an embarrassment of you.

But this man being at the bookstore had to be a coincidence. It didn’t make sense for him to be looking for you but that anxious thought lingered in your mind as you crushed the cardboard box you had just emptied. Your feet carried you towards the door into the back until there was a hand on your upper arm. Whoever it was, forced you to turn around and you came face-to-face with the man from the bar.

“Hi, is there anything I can help you with?” You asked, putting on your customer service voice and smile as you tried to pull yourself away from his grip. But it was strong, bruising and you could feel his blunt nails digging into your skin through your uniform.

“I just wanted to ask you a few questions,” The man responded, a charming smile spreading across his face. But now you could see right through it. In your drunken state, he had seemed so kind but now his charm was more predatory. It was a leer and you shoved your arm out of his grip, stepping away from him.

“Of course, just give me a minute. I need to dispose of this box in the back,” You retorted. The man narrowed his eyes and he opened his mouth but you had rushed into the back before he had a chance to deny you the opportunity. You slammed the door behind you, heart thumping in your chest and your boss appeared. Those usual kind blue eyes looked back at you and his bushy brown eyebrows pulled down, concern etched across his soft features.

“Another bad date coming to find you?” Your boss asked, a teasing smile on his face. You shook your head, heart thundering in your chest.

“No, I need to-” You cut yourself off not sure how to even begin and explain yourself. So, instead, you just said, “Can I call someone?” Your boss nodded and he watched as you rushed over to your bag, pulling your mobile from your pocket. In seconds, you shoved it up to your ear, calling Matt. You just prayed that he answered.

Your boss watched you for a moment before he decided to give you privacy and he went back to sorting through the new stock that had been delivered earlier that morning. Your eyes stayed closed as you waited for Matt to answer, foot nervously tapping and hand pressed against your head.

“Hey, aren’t you at work?” Matt’s voice filled your ears and the anxiety that was ready to boil over subsided a little. Matt would keep you safe.

“The guy from the bar. He’s here. He said he wanted to ask me some questions. I don’t know what to do. I think they’re going to-” You were panicking and rambling and Matt could recognise that tone anywhere which is why he promptly cut you off.

“Hey, calm down. Are you at work?” He asked, his voice was stern but calm. The fact that he wasn’t freaking out calmed you down and you let out a hum of ‘yeah’. You heard movement on the other end of the phone before Matt sighed, “Is there a way you could get out of the store without him seeing you?” You glanced over at your boss who was still sorting the new stock.

“I can’t leave, I’m on till closing and Lacey’s on shift but she’s still new,” You mumbled. Matt scoffed on the other end and you glanced at your boss who was now cocking an eyebrow at your words. You waved your hand dismissively, forcing a smile onto your lips before you turned your back to him. Making your boss worry was the last thing that you needed right now. He was already too kind to you and this was just something else you didn’t need.

“Listen, if he’s at the store, it’s not a social call. You need to get out before you get hurt,” Matt retorted, “I’ll send Karen to cover for you if that’s the problem.” Matt sounded frustrated and you glanced back at your boss before you sighed. You didn’t even know what to think. It had barely been two hours on shift and you didn’t want to disappoint your boss but Matt was right.

“I’ll work something out. I’ll text you when I’m home,” You decided. Matt let out a sigh of relief and you both said your goodbyes. As soon as you hung up your phone and put it back in your bag, your boss was looking at you expectedly. It was obvious to him that something was wrong and he wasn’t going to let you get away with not telling him. It had always be like that with him. He wanted to know his employees were okay.

“Are you just going to stare at me or are you going to tell me what that was about?” He asked as he gestured vaguely towards your bag. You sighed and ran your hands across your face before letting your shoulders drop.

“Something happened,” You began, not entirely sure how to word it. You didn’t want to worry him but you knew that you needed to give him something so that he would let you get the hell out of the store, “I saw someone at the bar last night and I pissed them off. I was drunk and now they’ve found me here and they’re really not happy with me and they’re not good people,” You were trying to be subtle but the way your boss’ face dropped told you that he understood, “I can’t deal with it. I’m tired and I need to talk to the police about the incident anyway. It’s just-” You were rambling again and you were glad when your boss cut you off with a wave of his hand.

“Don’t give me these excuses, just go,” He retorted, a wry smile on his lips, “Lacey can cover for you. It’ll give her a chance to prove herself.” Your boss winked and you chuckled softly at the man before you nodded your head. You grabbed your bag and pulled it over your shoulder, taking a deep breath. You walked up to him and hugged him. He chuckled and hugged you back, “Go get some sleep, okay?” He requested. You nodded and pulled back.

“I’m gonna head out the back, thank you, so much. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it!” You were smiling ear-to-ear and your boss simply waved his hand dismissively. You then rushed out of the backdoor and into the alleyway. You checked left and right before you rushed back to your apartment. The walk wasn’t far, a few blocks, and you were able to keep mostly to alleyways that were lit by the midday sun. You were safe from that man. 

And thankfully, you were soon back in the comfort of your apartment. The whole place was still clean. After you had woken up, you cleared everything up before you headed out to work. Your roommate left before you more times than not and so you always wanted to leave the apartment clean for when she got home off shift. 

The cleanliness meant that you didn’t have to worry about anything. Instead, you locked your front door and put your keys and bag on the side before you went over to your bedroom.

The adrenaline from the brief encounter was starting to dip now you were in the safety of your apartment and the exhaustion caused by your medication seeped right back in again. You grabbed your phone and texted Matt that you were home safe before you got into bed. You only managed to get your uniform off and replaced with a hoodie before you were snuggled up asleep in bed. You really were exhausted.

Hours later, you woke up to the sound of knocking against your fire escape. Your eyes blinked open, squinting across the room and quickly realizing that it had gotten dark. You had no idea how long you’d been asleep but you guessed it must have been at least eight hours since the sun had set. 

You heard knocking against your window again before you let out a disgruntled noise. A soft huff escaped your lips as you reluctantly slipped off the bed and pattered over to the fire escape. You grabbed some shorts on the way over, realizing that you were only in a hoodie and underwear. Matt couldn’t see you but you wanted to at least look somewhat presentable.

Matt’s frame was blocking out the moonlight but you could see that he was in his Daredevil suit. His shoulders were pulled taut but he seemed to relax slightly when he heard you moving around. You grabbed onto the edge of the window and shoved it up with all of your strength, a grunt escaping your lips from the effort.

“Hi,” You mumbled. Your voice was a little scratchy and it was obvious that you had just woken up as you stepped back, pulling the shorts on as you went. You rubbed the crusties from the corners of your eyes as he stepped through into your bedroom and you crossed back over to your bed. You didn’t feel any less tired. The antidepressants were really doing a number on you and you wanted to be awake and alert but there was a cloud of tiredness hanging above your head.

“Hey, was everything okay at work?” Matt asked as he pushed the window down to stop the cold night air blowing through. You nodded your head in response, pulling the covers around yourself as you curled up against the headboard. You really wanted to go back to sleep but you knew that you had to deal with this conversation first.

“Boss gave me the time off,” You muttered. Matt nodded his head and his head suddenly twitched to the side. His face pulled down into a frown but he refocused on you when he realized you had begun speaking, “He loves me too much for his own good and it’s really annoying that he had to come in. I needed that money but no, that just isn’t important, isn’t it?” You muttered bitterly. Matt’s eyebrows furrowed at your ranting and you looked up at him, “What do they even think I know? Why would they want to speak to me?” Matt shrugged his shoulders in response. He didn’t entirely know either but it was his mission for the night to figure it out.

He hadn’t had a chance to listen to their operations between the previous night and now. Otherwise, he would have warned you sooner and he would have told you to stay at home; he would have done a lot more. You sighed and rubbed your eyes with the heel of your hands again.

“I’m so tired,” You muttered. Matt frowned as he looked back in your direction. You couldn’t see where he was really looking because of the red lenses of his helmet but you assumed he was looking at you.

“The new meds?” He asked. You nodded in response. He could tell that they were having an effect, physiological. It was weird but something seemed different about how your body functioned. He had noticed it over the past few days but he felt weird commenting on it, “How long have you slept?” You shrugged.

“A few minutes after I text you until when you knocked,” You retorted. Matt nodded and suddenly his head twitched the side but before he could say anything, your bedroom door opened. Your roommate was standing in the doorway and she stared at you in the gloom of the room before her gaze moved to Matt who hadn’t made it out of sight before he had already been spotted.

Quinn - your roommate - just stared at Matt for a moment. Her jaw had dropped slightly, frozen in place as she took in the sight of The Daredevil in her apartment, in her roommate’s room. Quinn had no idea what to say. Her eyes narrowed before she looked at you. Your face had dropped, unsure what the hell to say to this scenario. You could probably make something up but right now, in your sleepy haze, you had absolutely nothing that you could come up with.

“I always knew you were into some weird shit,” Quinn stated before she shook her head disbelievingly and glanced behind her towards the front door of the apartment, “There’s some guy here for you?” Your eyebrows furrowed and you glanced at Matt but he spoke before you had a chance.

“Tell him to leave,” His voice sounded different. He had made it deeper, trying to be more intimidating. You glanced between him and your roommate and she simply nodded her head and walked off to the front door, too confused and tired to even question why Daredevil was in her roommate’s room. You shot up from the bed and closed your bedroom door but before you could say anything to Matt, his face fell. 

Panic suddenly spread across his face and he pulled the bedroom door back open. You both came face-to-face with one of the men from the previous night. The man’s face twisted in annoyance at the sight of Daredevil and you stepped back into the bedroom. You didn’t know what to do and Matt took the lead, throwing the first punch.

You had seen Matt fight more than once but you had never been this close to it. You took another step back as Matt managed to land another punch. But the man was getting his fair share of hits and the two moved into the main room of your apartment. 

Your gaze flicked off of them to your roommate - Quinn. Her head was bleeding and she looked dazed as she lifted her head up. Her eyelids were hanging heavy and you glanced from her to Matt.

He was fine. You knew he’d be fine so you made a break for it across the room but before you could get to Quinn, the man grabbed your arm. He threw you into the wall by your bedroom door and your head smacked harshly against it, paint chipping off the wall. You cried out in pain, cradling your head as Matt grabbed onto the man and the pair crashed through the dining room table.

From across the room, Quinn whimpered as she watched Matt and the man in horror. The table crumbled beneath the two heavy bodies and you flicked your gaze away from the table to Quinn. You had to protect her even if your head was throbbing in pain. She hadn’t signed up for any of this and it was your fault. It was your fault this was happening. So, while the man seemed to be occupied exchanging punches, you made a break across the room again.

But, the universe really wasn’t on your side, because as you stood up. The man had kicked Matt off and turned his sight on you, grabbing you. He yanked your hair back and you cried out as you lost your balance, falling on your ass. The man didn’t get another opportunity to hurt you though because Matt had wrapped his arm around the man’s throat, cutting off his airway.

You glanced back at Matt before crawling to Quinn. The woman was clearly dazed. Her gaze not quite focusing as you cupped her face, kneeling in front of her.

“Are you okay? Hey, Quinn? Look at me,” You mumbled out quickly. Quinn’s gaze slowly moved away from Matt - who had successfully forced the man to pass out - to you. You smiled softly, reaching out to check her face for wounds. There was just a cut across her forehead.

“What- Who- What just happened?” Quinn asked softly. Matt walked over, lingering over the top of the pair of you.

“You both need to get out of here,” Matt said before you got a chance to answer any of Quinn’s questions. His voice had dropped an octave again, doing his best to disguise his identity. You looked up at him, face crumpled.

“I don’t know where to go,” You stuttered out. He gave you a look and you quickly realized what that meant which quashed any fears that you had of suddenly being homeless.

“I can go to my sister’s,” Quinn said suddenly. You looked down at her, a frown spread across your face, “They’re not after me, right?” You shook your head.

“They’re after me. You’ll be safe, you just can’t be here,” you explained. Quinn sighed and she seemed to have come back to earth, no longer dazed by the fight that they had just witnessed. A hand ran through her hair and she nodded.

“I’ll grab a bag and head out. What are we gonna do about him?” Quinn asked, gesturing towards the man that was knocked out on the floor. Matt glanced at you and then at Quinn before he went back to the man.

“He’ll sort himself out,” Matt said. You nodded and then the three of you got into gear. You probably had a few minutes before the man came back to life and so, you packed a bag and Matt led the both of you out. Quinn was looking at the two of you strangely, as if she knew that it wasn't a coincidence that you happened to know Daredevil. It was like she knew something or wanted to ask something but she wasn’t saying a word.

When she got into a taxi, you both said bye and hugged each other before she disappeared. You then looked at Matt who had a frown on his face. He didn’t seem happy with anything that had happened tonight but he couldn’t really do anything about it. You were in danger and he had to try and do something to help you.

“Go to my place. I’ll be back later,” Matt said, not saying anything more than that. You stared at him, sighing before you nodded. He then disappeared up onto a rooftop while you headed down the block to his apartment. It wasn’t the first time you had gone to his apartment, you had been there more than once. He was one of your best friends but it still felt strange to be there without him or Foggy. The apartment building was eerily silent and when you unlocked the door with the spare key, the whole place felt unsafe.

But you knew that you were safe. You were at Matt’s place, you were safe. So, you locked the door and headed over to the sofa. You dropped your bag and took out the pill box, placing it on the coffee table. Your vitamins were in there, your tablets were in there. It was fine. You had been paranoid about forgetting them but you had them and you were safe.

You were just fine.

And so you curled up on the sofa and waited for Matt to come back.

-

Frank Castle was a fairly patient man but sitting on the roof waiting for Red was the last thing he wanted to be doing with his Saturday night. The two of them had places to be and shit to do. Yet, he was pissing about and leaving Frank in the freezing cold. To say that he was annoyed would be an understatement. He was ready to pummel Matt by the time that the masked man appeared on the rooftop. He looked roughed up already and that made Frank’s jaw tick.

“What time do ya call this, huh?” Frank snapped as he glanced over at the man. Matt scoffed as he walked over to Frank, perching beside him.

“I had something to deal with,” Matt stated bluntly. Frank scoffed and glanced around the city.

“We had a deal. I help you with this and I don’t pummel you. You’re making that real hard, Red,” Frank retorted as he glanced at Matt. Matt turned to look at him, clearly unimpressed by Frank’s frustration. Though, he hadn’t been in the freezing cold for the past hour alone.

“Why didn’t you just leave?” Matt asked. Frank looked at him like he’d just asked the dumbest question.

“I finish the business, I start. Now, where are these assholes?” Frank asked, not wanting to talk to him anymore than absolutely necessary. The next morning he planned on getting the hell out of town so he needed this done, tonight. And if he got his way, it would be.

<3

next chapter

#frank castle #matt murdock #frank castle fic #reader-insert #frank castle x reader #frank castle fluff #the punisher fluff #frank castle x fem!reader #frank castle x you #the punisher x reader #frank castle x female reader #reader insert #the punisher

[thcfountain]

Dating Jolly would include:

mdni. nsfw (daddy kink, creampie, spanking mention, etc) & fluff content below cut. Scroll back a little on my blog for Noah, Matt, and Nicholas.

Also there is some Swedish below and I'll warn you now that my Swedish isn't as strong as my Norwegian or Danish.

Jolly loves to play argue with you. Screaming at you to make him a sandwich, knowing full well you'll tell him to fuck off. You'll make it for him though because you love him.

He makes the snacks and you pour the wine and the two of you sit down to watch trashy tv together. Jolly is obsessed with The Kardashians, he would force the band to do reality tv if he could.

"Why do you like this so much?" You ask one day, leaning back into him embrace as you both sprawl out on the sofa.

"I like drrrraaamaaa," he sing-songs, rolling the r in drama a little harder than necessary and you can't help but snort out a laugh.

He calls you pet names in Swedish. "älskade min," (my beloved) and "söta min," (my sweet) are his favorites.

"Du är så vacker, älskade min," he murmurs between soft and slow kisses as the two of you laze in bed one morning. Your bodies, naked, are tangled under the sheets and it's less about sex and more about intimacy in the moment.

("you are so beautiful, my beloved.")

Jolly is a god at sex. Years of playing guitar has made him swift and skilled with his fingers, it's also given him the very fun ability to fuck you perfectly in time to your favorite songs.

Ring and middle fingers curl up inside you, perfectly hitting that sweet spot that he always seems to find. His thumb grazes over your clit and your hips buck upwards as you beg him to let you cum.

Your walls clench around his fingers as he pumps them in and out of you at the perfect pace. "That's my girl," he coos, "good girl, cum for me, princess," and you do.

Euphoria washes over you, all the way down to your toes as you cry out his name, cumming over his fingers.

He's a big fan of anger fucking. You're the only thing that can soothe his frustration, calm him down when things are too stressful. Of course he would never do it unless he knew you wanted and you've yet to say no because angry Jolly fucks like a beast.

He smacks your pussy and although you grit your teeth, you know you're getting wet and he does too. A second slap lands and Jolly's hand lingers over your mound for a moment before a finger slides up your slit, smearing your juices. "Such a bad girl," he says, amusement in his voice. "getting wet from daddy's punishment like a little slut."

He pushes you down onto the floor in front of him and pulls his hard cock out of his pants. "Maybe if you show daddy you deserve to cum-" he doesn't get to finish his sentence, trails off in a sigh of pleasure as your mouth obediently goes to his crotch.

-

The hand on the back of your head pushes your face down into the pillow, your own hands clenching the sheets. Jolly fucks you from behind, hard and fast, using you for his own pleasure. You've cum twice already at his manhandling, something about seeing him like this when he's normally so sweet just gets your gears going.

"Fæn," the curse leaves his lips and you feel him bottom out, holding his hips against you from behind as he fills you with warm cum. When he finally pulls out and you fully sink against the mattress, he chuckles. "I didn't say you were done, söta min," you look over your shoulder at him, taking in the vibrator in his hand. He loves to see how many orgasms he can get in one night from you.

You become the "Band Mom" so to speak. Despite Matt calling himself "Tour Dad", it's actually Jolly who holds the dad responsibilities. He's the one that gets calls in the middle of the night when someone is sick or in trouble, who deals with childlike behavior for his attention. You get swept up into the mom friend roll because of it.

"I wanted an uncrustable," pouts Noah, looking at the sandwich Jolly had made him. The band was over to discuss an upcoming tour and when the afternoon had come and stomachs began to rumble, Jolly had wordlessly started to make everyone lunch.

"I'll cut the crust off and it will be the same thing," you promise, pulling the plate towards you and beginning to carefully cut crust off the bread.

"Can you cut mine off too?" Asks Folio, sliding the plate your way as Jolly slices up apples so his boys will get some fruit with their lunch.

"It's not the same," Noah complains when you pass the crustless sandwich back, now working on Folio's. "I don't want this because it's not what I asked for."

Jolly puts the knife down and turns around, hands on his hips. "That is not very nice behavior," he reprimands Noah, fully in dad mode now. "Say you're sorry."

Noah's eyes roll as a chorus of "ooh you're in trouble," runs through the band. "Okay dad," he says sarcastically. "I'll apologize to mom."

if you express the desire to learn to play guitar, Jolly jumps to teach you. He buys you a guitar and takes time when he's home to go over lessons with you. Sometimes he just sits with you in his lap, his hands over yours as he shows you proper finger placements for each note.

Jolly absolutely is the only one who's not afraid to fuck on the bus. They have rules for fucking because of him.

There's also been a few times where he's stalked off stage to where you were waiting backstage. He's sweaty and full of adrenaline after a set and he pulls you into the closest empty room or closet, fucking you hard and fast right then and there.

He always brings home little gifts from tour and you have no idea how he manages not to lose them during travel. You love and cherish each one.

You pick up every Swedish cuss word, naturally, and Jolly thinks it's hilarious that if nothing else, you know how to say FUCK.

Jolly, on occasion, will agree to sharing you with one of us his friends. It's usually a little awkward the first time you two bring it up to someone the idea of bringing them into your bed for a night but mostly no one has said no yet. Being spit roasted by Jolly and Nicholas had been the highlight of your week once.

he thinks you are the prettiest person he's ever seen and he's constantly showering you in praise and compliments. You feel ethereal in under his gaze.

Jolly makes sure to set aside time for date night when he's not on tour. Sometimes date night is just the two of you curled up on the couch with some snacks, sometimes it's a fancy dinner somewhere nice.

He goes all out for valentines day. Bouquets show up at your workplace all day and when you go home, your car is filled with a ridiculous amount of flowers. He remembers all of your favorites. Boxes of chocolates await you when you get home and he's drawn you a bath and poured you some wine so you can relax while he makes dinner. If he's not home for the holiday, he still makes sure you get delivery after deliver of bouquets and chocolates and he facetimes you as soon as he can.

the few occasions that you fly out to wherever the band is on tour, hanging with them for a day or two just for a few moments here and there with Jolly, you always let yourself be put to work. It surprised him and made him feel proud the first time you showed up to visit in the beginning of the relationship and immediately you started helping to unload gear. Over the years you've learned how to set up a majority of their gear, how to properly load and unload it, you make sure you pull your weight in order to help out.

he's never loved you more than he did during a UK tour when you left the set early and made sure to have food waiting for band and crew back at the busses. He's not sure how you managed to bring so much back on your own or how you kept it warm, but damn is he grateful.

"NO SLEEP FOR DINNER!" Folio shouts in excitement before digging straight into a container of pasta, with his hands.

Jolly cups your cheeks in his hands, pressing soft kisses against your lips. "You are magnificent," he tells you and then turns to Folio and immediately reminds him that he needs to use utensils, not eat spaghetti by the fist fulls.

Jolly constantly talks about the future too.

"We'll have 6 kids," he declares and your jaw drops. "Maybe 8, I haven't decided yet."

"We'll have two, maybe three. If you think I'm popping out eight kids, you are insane," you tell him.

"Hm, maybe I'll have to birth a few," he jokes and you roll your eyes even though you laugh.

#jolly karlsson smut #jolly karlsson fanfic #jolly karlsson imagine

[pastafossa]

pasta that tag about frank at the wedding has me rolling. i can just imagine ciro, all 'you're trying to kill me. first a lawyer, now the punisher' 😭

The first realization I ever had for their wedding was, 'Jane's side is going to be full of Mafia guys including a powerful crime boss and Frank The Killer Of All Mafia Guys is going to be directly across the aisle or potentially in the wedding party staring down at all of them' and shortly thereafter I just began to cackle because holy shit the comedic potential

'You're trying to kill me. First a lawyer, now the Punisher. You invite him to the wedding. Him! In a place I cannot bring my weapons, because your future mother-in-law is a nun. Do you seek your inheritance early, mia cara? Is that what this is?! You wish to take over my empire, and so you play upon an old catholic father's desire to see his daughter down the aisle!' 'He's just a friend Ciro. He won't do anything, uh, for now.'

'How long is this 'for now'??? What is this 'for now'???'

'He's agreed to give you all a grace period of two days post-wedding. So I wouldn't... linger.'

'I am going to bring a pistol. Just a small one-'

Matt, three rooms away: 'You will NOT bring a gun to my wedding.'

'He seeks to kill me, too. He will steal your inheritance and use it for a new Devil suit and ridiculous batons with tools inside, mia cara, mark my words.'

LATER.

Frank up in front as they all wait:

Nervous mafia members:

Frank:

Mafia:

Frank: *reaches into pocket*

Mafia: *loud gasps, 10 people stand up, 3 run*

Frank, smirking: *slowly tugs out phone to check the time*

Matt: 'You're doing that on purpose.'

Frank: 'Yes I am. Don't tell me you want me to stop.' Matt: '...I never said that.'

#it's going to be hilarious i am delighted #the red thread

[mabelstone]

can you write smut where reader distracts matt and gets him worked up while he’s on an online interview and he ties up and punishes the reader?

mabey is here to deliver <3

Payback

CW: 18+, dacryphilia (arousal by tears), bondage i guess?, rough sex

word count: 2055 (sorry!)

"Well, yeah!" You heard Matt laughing in his office through the gap in the door. "And that's the part nobody thinks about!" Hearing him genuinely laugh made your heart happy. You recalled him telling you about an online interview he had today, so that explains all the South Park talk. You decided to finish folding the washing while listening in on his interview. It was always a trip for you when you remembered just how famous he was.

You continued to eavesdrop, listening to the interviewer ask the same old boring questions they always did.

"So, how did South Park come about?"

"Would you ever do a sequel to Team America?"

"Blah blah blah... BASEketball?"

You chuckled to yourself, seeing right through his nice guy act, prepared for him to complain to you the minute the interview was over. Then it caught your eye. The tiny but powerful phone-controlled vibrator he used on you at dinner last week. You pondered for a moment before shooting him a text.

hey, remember when u made me cum in front of all your employees last week

he replied almost instantly. Luckily, Trey was in the call and leading the conversation, so Matt could get away with this for now.

Not now doll x

yes now. move the camera away from the door

You heard him clear his throat, subtly turning his computer away from the door. You took the opportunity to slip in, crawling over to him on your hands and knees completely naked. He shot you a warning glance before returning his eyes to his screen, forcing out a well timed laugh. You situated yourself between his legs, unzipping his jeans as quietly as possible, watching the way his jaw clenched when you gently ran your fingers across his bulge.

For context, you, Matt, Trey, nearly all of the South Park Studios staff, and a large number of Comedy Central higher up's were out for a celebratory dinner. Of course, what nobody at that dinner knew was that Matt was a bit of a masochist, and in turn, it was safe to assume you were too. He loved to fuck with you in public, especially since he'd recently bought a bunch of phone controlled sex toys. As there were so many people at the table, he could torture you with sweet vibrations and fly completely under the radar. No one even noticed the way you were squirming in your seat, or the way you had to put all of your focus into your breathing. Nobody besides Trey of course, who just had to tell a few of their friends... Who then told a few of their friends. Before you knew it, half the table was watching you play off an orgasm while Matt acted oblivious to the situation. He played it off so well, nobody would've ever known that your nails were digging so deep in his thigh, you nearly drew blood.

You raised your open mouth to his clothed cock, breathing warmth onto the head, instantly excited by the way his brows furrowed in attempt to focus on anything but you. He reached his hand out to push your head away, and you could practically hear the blood rush to his cock when you took two of his fingers into your mouth. Satisfied with the cough he faked to mask his unsteady breathing, you hooked your fingers into his waistband and watched his dick spring out before you. Eyes hooded and hungry, you wrapped your hand around him and started working his length, thumb flitting over his slit to use his precum as lube. Though he was 'laughing' along with the other guys in the interview, you could see his nostrils flaring slightly, and feel his hand impatiently urging your lips toward his pulsating head.

You obviously understood, lips immediately wrapping around his length, taking him all the way into your mouth at an unrelenting pace. You loved watching him pretend to be unfazed around others; meanwhile, his fingers had a vice grip on your hair, pushing you impossibly further down until your nose connected with the small tuft of curly hair below his navel. You snaked a hand down to massage his balls, eyes carefully trained on his movements. He let out a big breath and played it off as a yawn, yet you watched his toes curl against the carpet.

You realised this wasn't necessarily payback, but rather an exhilarating boost for his secret sadistic persona. You decided this was going to go your way instead. You began making obscene and obnoxiously wet sucking sounds around him as if you were in a porno, loud enough that no doubt, all of his fans could hear. His eyes shot open, and he slammed his laptop shut.

"What the fuck was that, Y/N?" He growled angrily, ripping you up to your feet by your hair. His eyes were angry, and you couldn't help but chuckle to yourself. "It's not funny at all. You're gonna get me in trouble."

"Hey, it's fair game. I'm just getting you back for last week's dinner." You threw your hands up in self defence, smile faltering slightly when he grabbed your wrist tight and dragged you into your bedroom.

"On the bed, on your back." He commanded, but of course you were in the mood to stir the pot, so you just stared back dumbly. He sighed in annoyance, roughly grabbing you by your arms and forcing you back onto the bed. Excitement rose in your chest as you realised what was coming. If you pushed him hard enough, he'd often punish you for whatever you did. You had a safe word, not that you ever used it. You both loved pushing each others boundaries, seeing who would break first, who was willing to cross a line. For the two of you, the line was near impossible to breach, meaning he'd forgive you for this as long as he could watch you cry an apology.

Incredibly turned on by this side of Matt, you decided to oblige, laying in the centre of the bed with your arms and legs extended for him. You knew where this was going. He huffed under his breath at the desperate sight of you. Breath already laboured in excitement, twitching against the constraints he tied to you. You giggled at the sight of him, annoyed, flustered, and incredibly horny.

"Why are you laughing? Look at you," he taunted, scoffing at the state of you as he rummaged through a drawer of toys you'd bought together over the years. A grin stretched across his lips as he found what he was looking for; a black ball gag attached to leather straps that hugged two tacky metal hearts. You writhed against the constraints, feeling arousal pool between your thighs. You whimpered as he approached, making his way beside the bed. You went to say something to set him off, but were instantly cut off with rough fingers gripping your jaw.

"Open," he commanded flatly, shoving the ball gag in with such force, your eyes widened and a surprised moan was ripped from deep inside your chest. He moved down to remove the restraints from your legs, rubbing your already red ankles with a faux pout, teasing, "I know, baby, I know." You whimpered in a mix of arousal and anticipation, unsure of what he was going to do to you next. He pushed your legs up to your chest by your ankles, licking a flat stripe up your slit, causing your legs to jerk. He adjusted himself so he was holding both of your ankles in one of his large hands; the pain of your ankle bones rubbing together causing you to wince. Matt didn't care. He just used his free hand to roughly squeeze your breast, his warm fingers digging painfully deep into the soft flesh. He teased your clit with the tiniest, most underwhelming licks imaginable, his tongue barely making contact with the sensitive bud. You impatiently jerked your hips as best you could with his strong grip on you. His nose brushed your clit so deliciously, and it were times like this that you truly believed he was given that nose for a reason. However, this caused him to moving away from your aching heat, also releasing your ankles in the process. You whimpered at the lack of contact.

"You wanna get fucked that bad, huh?" He taunted, gripping your hips tight enough to leave fingertip shaped bruises. "So desperate... So needy."

Your wide eyes followed his every move, watching him climb off the bed to strip his clothes, before crawling back between your legs. Your breathing hitched under the gag as you felt his slender fingers collecting your slick, coating his cock with your arousal before lining himself up with your entrance. Even after all this time, you still needed his fingers to stretch you before you had sex. Not that he was astronomically big, no. Just... painfully, painfully thick. Thanks to the little stunt you pulled, he was ramming into you with no warning.

You practically screamed, eyes screwed shut, teeth digging into the gag that muffled every sound you made. "Fuuuuuck," Matt let out a low groan that sounded so pretty, your stomach to flipped. He continued fucking you as if you were his personal toy, your legs up over his shoulders at this point. Sounds of your muffled moans, Matt's laboured breathing, and wet squelching accompanied by the clap of skin on skin echoed through the room in an orchestra of pleasure. He raised a hand, brazenly bringing it down to collide with your ass with a loud smack. Tears of pleasure and pain formed at your waterline as your eyes rolled back, Matt not once slowing his pace. You could feel him hitting that dizzying spot inside you repeatedly with so much force, you were sure he'd bust a hole in your cervix. Your wrists were tugging against the restraints tied to your bedposts, your head rhythmically hitting the headboard. Tears began to stream down your face, your cries muffled by the ball gag, the only noises coming from you sounded pathetic and strangled.

He finally halted his pace, briefly breaking out of his sadistic demeanour to pull the gag out of your mouth. "Do you want me to stop?" He asked, genuinely concerned.

To which you replied in the whiniest, most desperate tone ever, with tears continuing to stream down your cheeks, "I swear to god, Matthew, if you stop I will fucking leave you."

The next thing you knew, the gag was back in your mouth and he was fucking you harder than he had ever fucked anyone. You continued to sob, your tears rolling down your cheeks, drenching your hair and the pillow beneath you. Matt swiped a tear away with his thumb, sucking the salty liquid pleasure from it with a grin. His other hand was still firmly gripping your hip, guiding you up and down his length.

You couldn't even form words, let alone sounds at this point. You were so deep in pleasure that your jaw slackened around the gag, eyes rolling to the back of your head completely, legs spasming around him as you experienced the most intense orgasm you'd ever had. Your voice came back just as you reached your high, chanting his name like a mantra as he removed the gag from your mouth.

Whiney, fucked out cries of "oh, Matt! Matt, Matt, fuck! You feel so gooood." He watched as tears continued to stream down your face, never having seen you in this much pleasure before. His orgasm seemed to sneak up on him too, abruptly painting the inside of your walls with thick, hot ribbons of lust. He slowly pulled out, resting his sweaty forehead against yours, your hearts bashing against each of your ribcages in unison.

"Baby?" You began breathlessly, receiving a half-assed hum in response from an exhausted Matt. "Can you, uh... untie me?"

3 New Messages From: Trey Parker

You two are unbelievable dude...

Just because you left the room doesn't mean we couldn't hear you in the call

How the fuck am I supposed to explain this to Anne??

Guess he didn't shut the laptop properly.... You're gonna get it for that.

#matt stone #matt stone x reader #matt stone smut #trey parker #trey parker x reader #doug remer #doug remer x reader #i described his c*m really weird in this idk why... sorry

[petertingle-yipyip]

world class sinner - frank castle (masterlist)

season 2

pairings: billy russo x reader , frank castle x reader , punisher x exodus

summary: with daredevil dead, exodus returns from Quantico unsure of who she should be. fighting nightmares and deja vu, small sparks threaten to revive something saved for matt murdock before a shocking betrayal rattles New York’s two most dangerous vigilantes.

(1) - deja vu : Being back in the Kitchen almost immediately pulls her back into a fight. But without Matt, what has she become?

(2) if he had been with me: Further and further her humanity goes as Y/N commits herself to Frank Castle's crusade. Small moments threaten to bring her back, but how can she when there's nothing worth it... Or is there.

(3) haunted: Can’t breathe, can’t turn back. Y/N continues to walk the fragile line of her morality while finding an uneasy comfort in the presence of Billy Russo, despite being haunted by Matt Murdock’s memory. But reuniting with Frank Castle makes it little less miserable.

(4) aftermath: A quick run nearly turns disastrous when a bold move goes wrong. An attempted reconciliation between friends turns nasty, all because the aftermath of Midland Circle still lingers in Y/N’s actions.

(5) build god then we'll talk: Temporary alliances form on one side before fighting off an ambush from the other. All the while, dots are connecting for more than one player as the game grows more and more dangerous.

(6) so what now? : Limits are pushed and more secrets pile up as she continues to pretend on both sides. When they creep closer to one another, can she maintain all of her lies and save face or will she be forced to pick what relationship matters most?

(7) so it goes… : All eyes on her, a skilled illusionist. Playing the field for information gets what she needed but could threaten the relationship keeping her afloat.

(8) beautiful liar : A breaking point, new alliances, and seeds of mutual trust show Y/N who is and who isn’t on her side.

(9) bad omens: Lingering omens finally register and truths are revealed through blood, bullets, and betrayals.

(10) is it over now?: A long time coming, one fight comes to a bloody conclusion. Another lurks in the near future, and the connection between two friends and two lover is severed.

(11) sinner: It all comes down to one final night, where’s it all began. One who thinks he’s a god versus the one who once scared the Devil and the Punisher. The Devil wasn’t wrong after all to fear the evil she delivers.

(epilogue) i know it won’t work: After a couple weeks, Y/N decides to open Frank’s letter.

#ptyy mag #ptyy wcs #frank x oc #frank x reader #frank castle fanfic #frank x yn #platonic frank castle x reader #frank castle fic #netflix frank castle #frank castle x reader #frank castle #the punisher x vigilante reader #punisher fanfic #punisher fic #punisher x reader #netflix punisher #mcu punisher #punisher series #the punisher #frank castle series #frank castle angst #found family #netflix billy russo #billy russo series #billy russo fic #billy russo x reader #billy russo #billy russo fanfic #bill

[martyrmurdock]

𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐕𝐎𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐄

♡ note: hi, this is inspired by that one quote where it goes “if you're raised with an angry man in your house, / there will always be an angry man in your house. / you will find him even when he is not there.” this fic isn’t directly related to the quote, but i hope u enjoy :]

♡ pairing: foggy nelson, frank castle, karen page, matt murdock & gn reader

♡ word count: 3k

♡ tags: angst; hurt/comfort; au where frank, matt, foggy, karen, and reader are in a friend group; platonic relationships / friendships; arguments; yelling; reader does not do well with people yelling at all; reader has an adverse reaction to frank and matt arguing and feels really bad about it; matt calls reader sweetheart

Frank and Matt are arguing. Again. Normally, these occasions aren’t too bad. Normally, it’s just a disagreement they partake in or a bit of banter. The duo are much friendlier now- perhaps, even friends, although neither one would ever say so. They’re each too prideful for that. 

The pair frequently rib into each other and trade barbs- it’s simply how their dynamic works-, but today, it’s different. Today is a day like before. Before when there was only pure dislike and unfettered animosity between them, and they’d exchange blows that aimed to bruise instead of words that aimed to rile up the other. 

They’ve gotten into their fair share of arguments, but those squabbles always ended before they could get too ugly. Either Foggy, Karen, or you would deescalate the situation by redirecting the conversation towards a different topic or Matt and Frank would stop talking mid-argument and leave, taking time to cool off before returning back to the group gathering with a more level head.

It’s never been this bad.

Truthfully, you don’t even know how it got to this point, ignorant to what sparked this particular argument. All you know is that the situation has gotten wildly out of hand, escalating so quickly before your very eyes that you can hardly wrap your head around what’s currently happening. 

Standing toe-to-toe in the middle of Matt’s living room, Matt and Frank look like they’re seconds away from engaging in an all out brawl.

“Back off, Red,” Frank says in a low, dangerous tone that sends a shiver down your spine and makes the hairs on your arm stand on end. You’ve never heard Frank sound like this before, his tone so dark and threatening, and you know that the man standing before you know is the man that strikes fear into the heart of others as the Punisher.

Off to the side of the main room of Matt’s apartment, you stand between Karen and Foggy as you all fruitlessly attempt to get Matt and Frank to knock it off. Unconsciously, you scoot closer to Foggy, instinctively seeking the comfort of your dear friend. The blond notices the subtle movement out of the corner of his eyes and places a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“You alright?” He whispers into your ear, without looking at you. His blue eyes stay trained on Matt and Frank, unwilling to allow his gaze to stray for even a moment- unsure of what may happen if he does so.

You take a deep breath in, trying to calm the racing of your heart before shakily exhaling out. “I’m alright, Fog,” you lie. You are definitely not alright, but you don’t wish to weigh down your friend with your silly worries, especially not when there are more pressing matters at hand like stopping your other friends from physically tearing into each other. “I just don’t like seeing them argue,” you admit, which is true. You hate watching two of the people you love most in this world spew such hateful words at each other. It hurts.

“Me neither,” Foggy sighs, sounding impossibly tired for a brief moment. For some reason, it makes you feel guilty. You’re not the only one who dislikes when Matt and Frank fight (you know for a fact that neither Foggy or Karen enjoy their verbal collisions), but you feel like you take it harder than them, and that idea makes you feel bad.  

Foggy squeezes your shoulder before letting his hand drop back down to rest by his side, and you find it easier to breathe, even if it’s just ever so slight.

The sound of Matt raising his voice startles you from your thoughts. Your breath hitches and your chest tightens uncomfortably when Frank’s voice rises to match Matt’s in volume.

You don’t who it is that begins to all out shout- whether it’s Matt or Frank-, but it doesn’t matter. The drastic change in volume makes you instinctively flinch. Hard. The action goes unnoticed by the two yelling (they’re much too engrossed in their verbal clashing to pay you any mind), but not by the two by your side. They exchange glances, looking at you in between them before looking at each other. They don’t need words to communicate what they’re thinking.

Your head swims- the loud angry voices of your loved ones amplified in the depths of your mind. You’re so lost in thought that you jump in place when Karen places a careful hand on your arm to garner your attention. Her expression softens when she sees how you react.

“Hey, do you want to hang somewhere else while Foggy and I sort this out?” Karen quietly asks, barely audible over Matt and Frank’s overlapping voices. Karen’s voice is gentle and kind and completely unlike the sharp and scathing tones of your friends, who are locked in their heated stand off just a few feet away. With the hand clasped around your arm, she rubs small comforting circles into your skin.

You want to deny her suggestion, to assure her that you’re okay, but when you open your mouth to respond to Karen, the words get stuck in your throat. How frustrating. You close your mouth, pressing your lips tightly together, and roughly swallow- trying to dislodge them. You’re ready to lie to Karen, even if the assurance will taste acrid on your tongue, but a roaring yell- louder than anything you’ve heard so far- makes you change your mind.

“Y-yeah, I’ll be on the roof,” you stutter out. If you could think more clearly, you’d feel embarrassed for tripping over your words, but all you could think about in this moment was getting as far as you could from the yelling.

Karen gives you the most comforting smile she can muster, but it’s strained around the edges. “I’ll go up and get you when this is dealt with,” she promises. Before you can leave, flee as far as you can from the scene, Karen squeezes your arm and gives you a look. “If you need me for any reason, call me.”

Despite your current state, the corner of your lips curls up into something that almost resembles a smile. You’re thankful to have a friend like Karen in your life. “I will, Kare,” you place your hand over the one she has on your arm, “Promise.”

Satisfied with your reply, Karen releases her easy grip on you, allowing you to book it towards Matt’s front door. As soon as you’re out the door, out of the apartment, you immediately make your way to the staircase that leads to the rooftop. 

A sense of urgency overcomes you as if something truly terrible will happen if you don’t make it to the roof in time, even if there is no time limit, no countdown. The arguing, the senseless yelling, has jumbled your thoughts, leaving you feel discombobulated. You cannot shake off your irrationality, cannot even see that you are being irrational. You increase your stride, skipping over every other step as you run up them as fast as you can without tripping over your feet and falling flat on your face.

"Why is this so damn heavy?” you mumble to yourself once you make it to the top of the staircase, grunting as you push your shoulder against the rooftop access door. You push and push and stumble, nearly falling over when the door suddenly flings open beneath your weight. You’re quick to stabilize yourself on your feet, almost tripping over nothing when when the door loudly slams behind you, effectively startling you.

On shaky legs, you speed walk over to the edge of the roof, curling your hands around the concrete barrier meant to prevent one from falling off the building and tumbling down to meet their untimely end. Loose gravel digs into your palm, biting into the skin as you tighten your grip. It hurts, but the pain is minimal. So minimal, in fact that you could easily ignore it, but instead, you focus on it. The slight pain forces you into the moment, grounding you into the present. Just like how the brisk air on your face is cold, stealing your body’s warmth the longer you stand out in the open, but it still feels good because you can feel it.

You take a few deep breaths- inhaling in, holding your breath, and exhaling out before repeating the cycle. You do it over and over again until your brain feels less foggy, and you can actually think relatively clearly.

A tsunami tide of shame and embarrassment crashes over you as you think about how you reacted to Matt and Frank arguing. It was stupid of you to get so worked up over it. Utterly unreasonable of you. You may not like it when people raise their voices and shout, but you’re not sure there’s anybody who does like it. You didn’t have to run off like a scared little kid just because Matt and Frank raised their voices. You weren’t even on the receiving end of their yelling for crying out loud. Your reaction speaks volumes of how truly pathetic you are.

The sound of the door to the rooftop swinging open immediately makes you tense up, jolting you from your downward spiral of self-pity. You turn your head and look over your shoulder, expecting to see Karen, who’s presumably come to get you, but to your surprise, you see Matt and Frank.

The tension in your body doesn’t dissipate as it normally would when you're greeted with the sight of two of your dearest friends. Instead, you go even more rigid, your body wound up even tighter than before as the pair come closer to you. You can still recall the sound of them of screaming, how rough and venomous their voices sounded as they spat vitriol at each other. The memory bounces around in your mind like a pinball machine.

Frank’s dark eyes stay trained on you, scanning your face and body as he observes your facial expression and body language. One glance at you is all it takes for him to stop in his footsteps, digging the heels of his black combat boots into the dusty ground, and hold out an arm to prevent Matt from approaching you any further.

Matt opens his mouth- ready to protest-, but when Frank whispers for him to listen in that gruff tone of his, the brunet presses his lips together and inclines his head towards you, listening to the roaring of your pulse and the swift beating of your heart in your chest. Matt holds his hands up, palms facing you as if he’s placating a cornered animal.

“Sweetheart,” Matt softly says, his tone completely different than it was when he was arguing with Frank, “Is it okay for us to come closer?”

You turn your body around, away from the concrete ledge, to face them. Your lips part to reply, but nothing comes out as you hesitate.

“You can say no.” Your eyes dart from Matt’s face to Frank’s. His previously hard expression softens when your eyes meet his. “It’s alright if you want us to stay over here.”

“No, it’s okay.” You shake your head. “You can…you can come closer,” you say, but the words are unsteady on your tongue, coming out as clumsy, as if you’re unsure of them.

A furrow forms between Matt’s brows, but he chooses to listen to you, taking slow steps towards you. Frank follows his lead, broadcasting his movements so as to not startle you in any way. They both stop a good few feet away from you, not keen on pushing your limits.

“Where are Foggy and Karen?” you ask after a lapse of awkward silence falls over you three.

“They’re inside the apartment,” Matt quickly answers. His tongue darts out of his mouth to wet his bottom lip. “Do you want them here?” The instead tacked on the end of that question goes unsaid but you can still hear it.

“No,” you rush out, making Frank raise a brow at you. You heat up under his gaze and avert your eyes away from duo to look out at the skyline. Looking out at the cityscape is safe. You can’t embarrass yourself that way. You clear your throat. “No, it’s alright.”

You may be shaken up from what happened earlier, but you’re not afraid of the men standing in front of you. The shouting frightened you, yes, you’ll admit it, but not them. Never them. You know that neither Frank nor Matt would ever hurt you. You want to make sure that they know you know that.

The familiar sound of your name rolling off of Frank’s tongue reaches your ears. “Would you look at me for a moment?”

You peel your eyes from the dreary but comforting view from Matt’s corner of Hell’s Kitchen and shift your gaze onto Frank’s face. His expression is tight. Below his set of dark brows, which are slightly pinched together, his eyes are narrowed at you in a way that makes you feel small. The corners of his lips dip downward, marking his face with a frown.

Frank stares at you, analyzing you like you’re a specimen beneath a microscope. You release the breath you were unknowingly withholding when the hard edges of his face smoothens out, the tight set of his jaw disappearing.

“‘M sorry,” Frank says, gruff but earnest. Your eyes widen at the sudden apology falling from Frank’s lips. “For uh for scaring you like that. Red and I got so caught up in our shit that we didn’t realize we were making you feel bad.”

“You didn’t scare me,” you blurt out, panicky. Frank gives you a skeptical look, clearly not believing you. Meanwhile, Matt’s brows rise up to his hairline, shocked that your heartbeat indicates you’re telling the truth. “The yelling freaked me out, but you guys specifically didn’t scare me,” you clarify, “I could never be afraid of you guys. It could have been anyone yelling, I would have reacted in the same way,” you ramble, clenching and unclenching your hands into fists to release your nervous energy.

“Then, we’re sorry for yelling, sweetheart,” Matt gently says, kindly cutting you off in the midst of your anxious babbling. “Frank and I are adults. We should have handled our,” Matt pauses, searching for the right term to describe their verbal (almost physical) altercation, “disagreement in a more mature manner.”

“I’m sorry too.” You rub the back of your neck when both Matt and Frank turn their head toward you, matching expressions of confusion on their faces. “I’m sorry for freaking out like that. It was dumb of me to get all worked up just because you guys raised your voices,” you let your head drop as you laugh. The sound is hollow and full of self-deprecation. “It was stupid of me,” you bitterly say, staring holes into the ground.

“Don’t say that.” The firmness of Frank’s voice makes you jerk your head up. His eyes are hard, but not unkind when you meet his unwavering gaze. “Wasn’t stupid or dumb of you to react like that, so don’t say it was.”

The harshness of his tone makes you shrink slightly, even if you know that Frank isn’t upset with you.

“What Frank is trying to say,” Matt turns his head towards Frank, brows furrowed in blatant displeasure at the man’s less-than-gentle tone. “Is that you have nothing to apologize for, sweetheart. You shouldn’t feel bad for reacting in a completely valid way.”

“Okay,” you say in a small voice. You don’t quite believe Frank and Matt, but you don’t want to argue with them. You’ve had more than enough of arguing for today.

“Okay,” Matt repeats, wetting his bottom lip with his tongue. He knows you don’t believe them, but he won’t push the matter. Not right now. Maybe later, at a more appropriate time, Matt will talk to you about it, but you don’t need him pressing you about it right now. 

“Do you want to go back down to the apartment now” He angles his head towards the door on the roof that connects to his apartment, questioning. “Or stay up on the roof?” 

Your eyes drift from Matt and Frank to the city’s skyline. The day has passed you by, quicker than you realized, because the sun is setting beneath the horizon already, washing the sky in a melody of red and orange hues.

You turn to press your front against the concrete barrier and stare out at the horizon.

“Can we stay out here? Just for a little while longer,” you quietly ask, your words tinged with a plea as if Frank or Matt would deny your request.

“Course, we can.” Frank takes a slow step towards you, closely watching you for any indication that you’re uncomfortable with the decrease in distance between you. When he finds nothing, he takes a few more steps until he’s by your side. Matt trails after Frank, taking his place on the other side of you.

Both of them are close enough that you can feel the body heat radiating off of them, but far enough away to not crowd or overwhelm you. It makes you smile, how considerate of you they are. You’re lucky to have friends like them in your life.

Gently, you lean to the side to brush your upper arm against Matt’s before doing the same to Frank. I forgive you, the action silently says.

Matt shifts slightly until he is so near to you that his arm is flush against yours. Warmth emanates from his body, making you sigh in contentment. On the other side of you, Frank shuffles, moving closer to you as well. His shoulder gently knocks into you, prompting you to lean against him. Thank you, they soundlessly reply, we are undeserving of your forgiveness.

You sag against Frank, your body going lax as you let your head fall and rest against his shoulder. Your knuckles brush against Matt’s, the touch feathery-light before he gently slips his hand into yours. The tension in your frame finally unravels like a spool of loose thread, and you feel like you can breathe properly now that you’re comfortably sandwiched between two of the most important people in your life.

#matt murdock x reader #frank castle x reader #the punisher x reader #daredevil x reader #karen page x reader #foggy nelson x reader #matt murdock x platonic reader #frank castle x platonic reader #matt murdock x gn reader #frank castle x gn reader #daredevil x platonic reader #karen page x platonic reader #martyr writes #saint.matthew murdock #saint.frank castle #saint.karen page #saint.foggy nelson

[mattmurdocksscars]

Friends?!

Hey all! This is the first snippet of my Fratt x Fem!Reader series. As I mentioned in my other post, this isn’t going to be a cohesive fic, it’s going to be different snapshots into their lives. We’ll see various types of scenes so, as usual, this series is 18+. I hope you all enjoy this first part!

Warnings (For this part): Mentions of wounds and tending to them, cursing, three idiots arguing.

Both Matt and Frank were panting, the extent of their wounds finally catching up to them, as various criminals lay unconscious around them. Frank was sat on the ground, leaning up against the wall, while Matt limped over to him.

“Please tell me you know someone who can help, Red.” Frank muttered. The both of them needed medical care but wouldn’t be able to tend to their own wounds let alone the others. Matt tilted his head back and sighed, clouds of steam billowing from his mouth.

“Yeah. Yeah, I know someone. She’s not gonna be happy though.” Matt grunted as he helped pull Frank to his feet. Matt pulled the other man’s arm over his shoulder and the two of them began to hobble towards an exit.

“Why’s that?”

“Let’s just say she knows about you. Oh, and she only knows me as Daredevil, so please don’t ruin that for me.” Frank chuckled but nodded and then they were on their way.

~

The rhythmic thudding of your fists hitting the punching bag in front of you was almost drowned out by the music you were listening to. You’d been at it for some time now and sweat made your clothes cling to you. You were working through another round of punches when you heard your door close. There would only be one person coming to your house this late at night.

“D, that you?” You called out, working on unwrapping your hands. You also paused your music and realized that you were hearing two sets of feet in your house. You furrowed your brows.

“Yeah, it’s me and a, uh… friend.” That definitely didn’t seem right, so you tossed aside your wraps and walked to the bedroom door.

And promptly froze in the doorway.

There, standing in your living room was the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen and leaning against him?

Frank fucking Castle.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, D!” You began swearing a blue streak at the Devil who at least managed to look a little sheepish. The man beside him was equal parts amused and confused.

“Honestly? Honestly. You brought the fucking Punisher into my house. Him?! Of all people! And a friend? A friend?! You always pick the worst friends, D!”

“I do not, I-“

“He shot you! In the head!” You’re furious and Frank tries to ease the situation.

“To be fair-“

“Shut up!”

“I could always-“

“SHUT UP!” Frank damn near laughs as the both of you cut him off before going back to arguing with each other. He doesn’t miss the way you haven’t moved to kick him out yet though and finds himself trying not to smile. Instead, you move towards what must be a bathroom as you come back holding towels and a med kit. You and Matt are still bickering all the while, and Frank almost feels like he’s intruding on something more intimate than a simple argument. The two of you come to a break and you point angrily at your couch where you’ve set down some towels.

“Sit. Both of you.” Your tone brokers no arguments and so the two men shuffle over and sit down side by side.

“Which one of you is worse off?”

“Red.”

“Frank is.”

They both speak at the same time and you turn your head upwards as if beseeching a higher power. Frank has to try again not to laugh but then Matt speaks again.

“It really is Frank. His wounds are worse.” Frank shoots Matt a dirty look, one you ignore as you kneel in front of Frank. You look him over and assess the damage before getting to work. It’s oddly quiet as you work, neither men wanting to upset you. You work quickly, tending to Frank’s wounds with a efficiency that speaks to many nights of doing this before. Once you’re done with Frank, you move over to Matt.

“You know the drill, D. Off, except for your helmet.” Matt moves to unclasp his armor but when he goes to pull the piece over his head, he hisses in pain. Carefully, you reach forward and help him tug the chest piece up and off while being sure not to dislodge his helmet. Once that’s out of the way, you look him over and tut in disapproval.

“The two of you are a mess. You’re bad enough on your own, D. How’d this happen anyways?” You ask, working on taking care of Matt’s wounds. Frank is silent, unsure what Matt wants you to know, but Matt tells you everything. You listen closely as you work, nodding along to his explanations. Once you finish the last of Matt’s bandages, you lean back and wipe your forehead with your wrist. You take your gloves off next and drop them in the pile of dirty gauze that sits beside you.

“There. You both should be good for tonight. D knows the rules but since you’ve never been here before Castle, I’ll explain them. I patch you up, you stay and rest for a couple of hours. Just long enough for me to make sure you aren’t gonna die on me.” Frank opens his mouth to argue but you cut him off with a dark glare. “No. No arguing. You came to me for help, you follow my rules. You can leave a couple hours before sunrise.”

You stand and stretch, ignoring the discontent on Frank’s face, then start gathering up the used supplies.

“D, you can take the bed and Frank you can take the couch.” You tell them absentmindedly while you carry everything towards the trash. Immediately, both men start to argue.

“I’m not kicking you out of your bed.”

“This is unnecessary. Let Red take the couch and I’ll just leave.”

“Hey! No arguing.”

“But where are you going to sleep?” Matt has his hands on his hips in what you call his mom pose. He hates when you call it that but that’s exactly what it looks like.

“I’ve got a sleeping bag. I’ll sleep in my spare room, that way neither of you will bother me when you leave and you can sleep without your mask on without worrying about me seeing you.” Matt doesn’t appreciate that your logic is solid by the look on his face. Frank also looks displeased.

“I’ll take the sleeping bag, Red can take the couch, and you can take your bed. There’s no reason the two of us should get more comfort than you.”

“Except for the fact that you’re both injured and I’m not.”

“I’ve slept in worse places.” Frank grumbled, holding a hand out. “Give me the sleeping bag.”

You narrowed your eyes dangerously and stepped up to him. It didn’t matter that you had to tilt your head back to look at him, you were still a menacing sight.

“D takes the bed. You take the couch. I take the sleeping bag. No. Arguing.” Frank and you stared each other down for several moments before you both heard Matt sigh.

“She’s not going to back down. We may as well do as she says.” Even though you could only see the bottom half of Matt’s face, you could still see the exhaustion in him. You wondered when the last time he’d had a full night’s sleep was but brushed the thought off. He had made it clear that there was nothing between you two. If there was, he would have told you who he was by now. With that thought, you squared your shoulders and stepped away from Frank.

“Go to sleep you two. I’d say see you in the morning but you both better be gone.” Those were the last words you said before you disappeared back into the spare room you’d originally come out of. Frank turned and looked at Matt with a raised eyebrow.

“What?”

“Nothin’ Red. Nothin’.”

As predicted, the next morning both men were gone. What was unusual was that you had been carried and placed back in your bed. In a moment of weakness, you buried your head into your pillow and breathed deeply, taking in Matt’s scent.

Maybe one day he would tell you who he was.

Maybe one day he would finally address the tension between the two of you.

But today was not the day and you had bigger things to worry about. Like the Punisher now knowing where you lived and accepting help from you. You shrugged though and got out of bed to begin the day.

After all, what were the chances you’d even see Frank again?

#fratt x reader #matt murdock x reader x frank castle #matt murdock x reader #frank castle x reader

[shiorimakibawrites]

Writing Update - Alley Cat (And Ideas)

I've written 3,300 words so far for Part 16 - Debrief. Matt decided he wanted to be POV for this chapter. Also staring Foggy Nelson being a good friend.

Preview Snippet:

“Nah,” Foggy said. Matt could hear the smile in his voice. “Just us avocados tonight.” “We’re not just avocados, Foggy,” Matt teased. “We’re the best avocados in this city, remember?” Foggy laughed. “Damn straight. But right now, this avocado needs a beer.”

I think its about half done. I know what happens but actually getting the words on paper has been slower than I'd like.

Part of that has been IRL stuff like helping my mom bake stuff for her club's bake sale and meetings - her health doesn't allow her to bake as much as she used to. I don't mind helping and the quick breads and cookies sold well.

But I think an equally large part might be that one of my muses' favorite methods of procrastinating is coming up with new ideas. Going to write some separate posts about these ideas but here is a little preview:

DAREDEVIL

The Broken Hearts Club (Vigilante! Reader has sex with the Devil of Hell's Kitchen on Valentine's Day. Not for the last time. It's supposed to be just sex, some comfort while both of them struggle with loss but they start catching feelings . . . Background: The Snap - Foggy and Karen were dusted, Reader lost her boyfriend to side effect of the Snap)

A Fragile Thing (Reader has just discovered that she is pregnant but before she can tell her husband Matt, he disappears along with half the universe . . . )

Sanctuary (Doctor! Reader has a rather unusual patient. John Doe is unconscious, badly hurt and half-naked and the priest who brought you to him claims to have found him like that . . . and when he wakes up, John isn't any more forthcoming than the priest . . . Diverengence: Father Lantom and Sister Maggie realize that Matt needs more medical care than they can give him. )

The Punisher

Port in a Storm (Reader meets Frank Castle when his truck breaks down during a nasty storm. Soon after finds herself in the crosshairs of an ugly conspiracy that threatens not only her life but the lives of her children).

Kin

A Brand New Ending (Reader and Michael had been on-again, off-again for years but that might soon change. Provided certain members of his family stop messing things up . . . and becoming a father for the second?/third? time doesn't scare him off)

Spider-Man

Legacy (Reader is daughter of Matt Murdock. When he disappears during the Snap but many of his enemies don't, she is loathed to have all his hard work in Hell's Kitchen destroyed. Becoming a lawyer will take time but punching crime in the face? That she can start right away . . . meanwhile Peter is also trying to uphold the legacy of his own mentors . . . Divergence: Tony Stark is dusted instead of Peter)

Adrift (Reader disappeared during the Snap. When she comes back . . . her friends are all five years older now and she has brand-new sibling . . . then she meets two other lonely souls - Peter Parker and Spider-Man. Post Spider-Man: No Way Home).

UPDATE: Links to Ideas Posts for these stories have been added.

#fan fic related #writing update #writing ideas #daredevil #matt murdock #matt murdock x reader #the punisher #frank castle #frank castle x reader #kin bbc #kin rte #michael kinsella #michael kinsella x reader #spiderman #peter parker #peter parker x reader #links #upcoming fic update #upcoming fics #upcoming