#in the show and how fucking easy it is to have queer and trans characters on screen and just let them be. im gonna ugly sob

[p4nishers]

can we talk about how much queer and trans joy was this season? maggie and nina. they/them muriel, saraquel, beelzebub, even GOD. "you're a good lad" "im not actually, either". that one shopkeeper and his non binary spouse, played by a non binary actor. beelzebub and gabriel. shax, nina and maggie all thinking azi and crowley were together. also yes i'm gonna mention: crowley and aziraphale's kiss. it's just, i get that everyone's hurt and so am i but can we please focus on how beautiful this season was to us? we got so much and i'm so happy, despite the ending.

#i love queer people i love queer joy i love this show i love us sm #also crowley deliberately avoiding using 'mr' in the 1827 flashback cause she was SO CLEARLY presenting fem #this season was literally just queer people doing crazy shit for each other and im actually emotional over how accepted everyone was #in the show and how fucking easy it is to have queer and trans characters on screen and just let them be. im gonna ugly sob #good omens #good omens s2 #azicrow #good omens season 2 #good omens s2 spoilers #go s2 spoilers #go spoilers #go s2 #ineffable bureaucracy #ineffable spouses #i just realized god is actually they/she but that's cool af too #AND ELSBETH AND WEE MORAG TOO WOOOHOO GO SAPPHICS

[little-fandom-dump]

‼️OFMD S2 SPOILERS (1-7)‼️

ok but on a real note

it’s been said before but i will never stop saying it: i am so incredibly grateful for this fruity little pirate show, about how boldly and unapologetically queer it is!! david, rhys, taika, every person cast and crew- the decision to not only keep queerness in the story, but to focus the entire narrative around it- the jokes that are not made at the expense of queerness, but are crafted lovingly with the beauty of it?? the easy acceptance of jim’s gender? the drag night and the crew’s immediate loving support of lucius and pete’s engagement?? even while they’re being tortured!! the relationship developing between archie and jim, the way they’re as fiercely protective of each other as ed and stede are of each other? the fact we even get to see two older men have a loving sexual encounter- and have one of them bring his partner breakfast in bed the next day? the fact that said sexual affair was not dismissed or played for a cheap joke- but as a means to develop stede and ed’s relationship with each other (and ed’s relationship with himself)? izzy saying openly to stede he loves ed?? izzy sharing a tender moment with stede after ed leaves him?? supporting him?? singing fucking la vie en rose for the crew’s little party with his beautiful little voice?? izzy being so purposefully kind and trying to repair what’s been broken despite his heartbreak at watching the man he’s in love with be with another, a man who is just better for ed and helps him to become the best version of himself he can be?? the different kinds of queer relationships shown, all beautiful and with their own triumphs and issues? the sheer diversity of all of the crew members and supporting characters??

there are One Million things i could go on about, but i’m just. so so thankful i get to live to see things change, to see acceptance and representation and a story so focused around queer love. fuck. as an aspiring filmmaker who’s trans, queer, and indigenous- it makes me so happy and emotional and hopeful. i love this show, y’all.

#no because #the way i’m simply so emotional #are there things the show could improve upon? #sure #but it’s all so crafted with love that i will never regret how much this show means to me #ofmd2 spoilers #ofmd 2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd s2 #ofmd #ofmd season 2 #our flag means death s2 spoilers #our flag means death spoilers #our flag means death #ofmd spoilers #gay #queer #lgbt pride #trans

[clockworkouroboros]

Now that the 60th anniversary specials are all out, I guess I'm gonna share my thoughts about them all, because it's the internet or whatever. Overall, I do think there's a lot of good in these specials. The fan service is absolutely there, but it's been done in a different way than some of the past special episodes, and it really acknowledges I think the many different kinds of Doctor Who fans, from the people who just watch the revived series (or even just bits and pieces of the revived series) to fans of Classic Who and even those of us crazy enough to get into the extended universe. I mean, featuring Beep the Meep and the Toymaker as your two Big Villains is both ridiculous and speaks to the nature of Doctor Who fans that we were all so excited for them. So. A lot of really nice things about these specials all around.

In The Star Beast, we got a really nice blend of nostalgia for the original Tennant era with new, interesting characters and a healthy amount of fan service towards Beep the Meep's half a dozen fans. Between those three things and RTD's obvious love letter to and heartfelt (if perhaps a little clunky) support of queer (and especially trans) people, it's easy to look past the episode's flaws; namely, that it's very light on the plot, and the handwavey bullshit that retcons Donna losing her memories completely undercuts the emotional heavy hitting of Donna losing her memories. You mean it was *always* that easy? Fuck right off.

Wild Blue Yonder really brought in, for me, more than a hint of Wilderness Years Who. The bottle episode slightly claustrophobic feel, the terrifying unexplainable Not-Things, the goddamn salt—I thought this story was the strongest in the set. I think RTD, like many writers, has a tendency to try and make things bigger and bigger and bigger, when really, his best stories tend to be like this. Consider Midnight as another example—brilliant, terrifying, and also very similar to some of the more experimental stories of the wilderness years. If I had a complaint about this story, it's that I would want it to play into more of the sense of sensory deprivation that stories like Midnight and Scherzo did. But honestly, that's a nitpick. It infuriates me a little bit—RTD likes to go in for some spectacle, as seen in The Star Beast and especially in The Giggle (and also the s3 and s4 finales, and also DT's regeneration story, and also and also and also)—but some of his best work is done when he doesn't allow himself the spectacle and instead really pares everything down to the barest of bare bones.

And, honestly? The Giggle was a bit of a letdown. There are so many ways you could bring the Toymaker into Who again, and he ended up sort of being an afterthought. Neil Patrick Harris was obviously having a grand old time in the role, which is great—so why not give him a little more to chew on? I thought there was a lot that was great—Donna and the Doctor in the Toymaker's domain, as an example. I think, building off of Wild Blue Yonder, coming back again and again to just how much the Doctor has been through and how that has affected them, was also a really nice thing to include, and something that I wish had been brought up more during Thirteen's run, because she really went through it.

But that also brings me to my biggest issue with The Giggle, and that is the way David Tennant's Doctor (Fourteen? TenThree? TenTeen?) has been written in a way that still is overshadowing Ncuti Gatwa's Doctor. This was honestly one of my biggest concerns as soon as Tennant's return was announced, and one of RTD's past issues in Who has been his chronic overshadowing of characters of color in favor of a white fan favorite. (Martha and Mickey both get this treatment.) The regeneration scene pissed me off in a way that I didn't think Doctor Who could piss me off—generally speaking, I'm pretty level-headed about most Doctor Who things because this show is ridiculous enough that you sort of have to just roll with it. I already adore Ncuti's Doctor (from his extremely limited amount of screentime), but I can't help but feel that he's been cheated out of a proper introduction because he had to share his limited screentime with David Tennant, the most popular Doctor to ever exist in the show's 60-year history. Likewise, because of this ridiculous Journey's End 2: This Time It's Stupider nonsense, I'm genuinely concerned RTD will randomly bring DT back for some fun multi-Doctor fanwanks, and sort of write all over the first Doctor of color's era with David Tennant. Not that that will happen (I certainly hope not, anyway), but the fact that he's leaving it open as an option already has me worried.

So. Yeah. Maybe I'm being harsher on RTD than I would otherwise be, because the nostalgia for having him back is so ridiculously high that it's driving me a little insane, or maybe these are genuine issues. I'm not upset that he's back, but these specials—and especially The Giggle—left me extremely wary that we're going to get the same exact issues that he brought to Who in his first run. Overall it'll be fine, and again, I did get a lot of enjoyment out of these specials! There's a lot about RTD's writing that is objectively both good and consistent. That doesn't mean I'm not holding my breath going forward.

#dw spoilers #the star beast #wild blue yonder #the giggle #russel t davies #doctor who #fourteenth doctor #fifteenth doctor #sorry for the wall of text #and a reminder to everyone that you do NOT have to agree with anything that i say even a little! #i genuinely am not trying to shit on rtd i'm just concerned #so. yeah.

[cowbilover]

lo and queer masc/man rep

or therefore the complete lack there of. which is incredibly insulting considering how common and prominent it was in original myth (although not always perfect but what greek myth is regardless of straight or gay). also i will be using queer in place of LGBT+ as an umbrella term so if you're not comfortable with that then sorry.

now rachel has made attempts at including queer rep through hestia and athena as lesbians and morpheus (and maybe chiron? idk) as trans women. which could be a whole separate post on its own with the problems that arise with them, but seeing as i am not a lesbian or trans woman, i will not be speaking on them in this post nor to the same degree if i do ever mention them.

what i am is a queer man, both bisexual and trans. i am also a big enjoyer of greek myth. i am not a big enjoyer of lore olympus nor of rachel's complete lack of representation when it comes to men like myself despite it being again very prominent within the original myths. now seeing how badly she has handled other forms of representation for other groups, i am partially glad she hasn't tried. but while i am a little happy, i am more so overall upset and annoyed at this. it comes off as nothing more than simple erasure.

the closest we've seen of rep for queer men/mascs is aged up storge who is more feminine then other men in the story, but this has not been explicitly confirmed therefore i will not be including this. besides men can be both feminine and still cishet. finally storge is a minor background character with little importance, so even if rachel did decide to make him canon queer we likely would not see much of that.

his brother eros is another annoying case as he is unarguably coded as a gay best friend stereotype. but without being gay. he is fashionable, witty, intelligent, dramatic, and always serves as a shoulder for his straight friend to cry on. but again he is not even fucking gay. he is married to a woman with a child. while i would like to see better representation then the gbf stereotype it is still insulting that rachel while coding eros to act like that couldn't even do the bare minimum of making him bisexual.

now it has been pointed out to me that names of male lovers to gods have been used and slapped on female nymphs. krokos (one of persephone's dead nympth friends) was a male spartan lover of hermes, and ampleus (the name pysche took as a nymph) was a lover of dionysus. now i am not upset that rachel didn't include the original stories since the story is already messy enough. i am upset that she took the names of two queer men from myth and slapped them on two woman. one of which ends up marrying a man, and the other dying. a quick google search could show that these names belonged to male lovers of gods, and so to me it comes off as at best lazy and at worst erasure.

i won't be discussing much of dionysus since he was only recently introudced. nor of apollo since the erasure of his queer identity is only one of many problems that occur with his character and how rachel wrote it, which could constitution a completely separate post.

i will be discussing hermes though. as both a character that we have seen a lot of, and as one that has not been completely villainized by the plot. he had an incredibly early appearance in the webtoon and had a handful of myths where he had male lovers or expressed homosexual love. but not a single mention or even passing comment has ever been made about this. it would be incredibly easy for rachel to just throw in one allusion to any of his male lovers (besides krokos who has been turned into a nymph for some reason) yet this never happens.

zeus is another character we have seen a lot of, especially in regards to his many affairs. all of which have canonically been with women. despite the many affairs he carried out with men. one of the most famous being ganymede and the foundation for the myth behind aquarius and the cup bearer. again it would not be so incredibly difficult for rachel to add any allusion to his male lovers. yet again though, nothing. (i will come back to this post after some fast passes become public and i can discuss his treatment as a pregnant man)

poseidon also had a couple queer lovers but besides the reference to the fact that he has a polygam "pod" we haven't actually seen any of his partners besides his wife.

the way rachel draws men with all perfect six pack bodies is also something that annoys me, and i'll be discussing it briefly here. people always comment on the lack of body diversity for the women in the comic but for the men it is much more severe. hermes, thanatos and eros who were all shown to be more skinny and not completely jacked in the beginning of the story are now all ripped with washboard abs. the men are all built like brick walls and it is just upsetting to see as a trans man who does not fit into that category. it sends the message that to be attractive a man must be perfectly fit. not scrawny or skinny or god forbid even fat.

also again as i said in the beginning many of the myths for queer men were just as fucked and problematic. it’s greek mythology it’s inevitable. but i’m more upset over the fact that if rachel can modernize and (attempt to) make hetero myths less gross, then where is that effort for homo myths

overall despite the overwhelming amount of queer man/masc rep that exists within the source material, rachel utilizes none of it. there has not been mention or allusion to a single queer god, forget any trans god. to me it comes off as purposefully ignorant and as erasure of queer men/mascs. which is fucking annoying considering how many of us see ourselves for once fucking represented in these myths. she has plenty of opportunity to include rep for people like myself but continuously chooses not to, instead adding another hetero-centric plot line for no reason. it is tiring and annoying to see so many gods that were queer in their myths not be represented as such. i will not make assumptions about why rachel chooses not to include this kind of rep, i will simply say to me it comes off as blatant erasure.

i could go on, and probably will come back to this post but for now i have said what i have wanted to say.

#long post #anti lore olympus #anti lo #lo critical #rant #rant post #just let the gods be fruity goddamn

[ksfoxwald]

Wheel of Time - Thoughts and Spoilers

Not quite caught up on Wheel of Time, but my thoughts through episode 3:

The Seanchan design is so extra and it's absolutely perfect

Uno was... not enough of a fan favorite I guess? tbh I don't have strong opinions on him, and he's kind of one of those characters that didn't really have any relevance past book 2 but RJ kept writing obligatory scenes with him bc that man did not know how to just let characters go, so it's probably best to have him go out with a bang and be unambiguously dead in a very dramatic way.

I'm glad they did let him say "fuck" before he died, though, having a character whose only personality trait is that he swears all the time in a world where the worst swear is "bloody" is weaksauce.

Elayne is such a delightfully earnest but not in touch at all princess, I love it, it's like the perfect balance of clearly privileged but still honorable without being all "not like Other Nobles."

actually all the characters' personalities pop more in the show, like RJ never really gave his characters more personality than Stoic Man and Scheming Woman; and when he tried it was just a sort of weak, washed out personality. In hindsight I honestly don't know why I liked those books so much. I think some of it was because the world was so vast and the characters were so bland it was easy to insert your own thoughts into it.

the fake out with the Arches was so good! like it honestly caught me by surprise, thinking this was just another alteration the show made. I kind of thought Egwene was going to activate her dream magic and rescue Nynaeve, but I guess it did follow the book fairly closely after all, just with more drama.

speaking of dream magic, I like the way they seem to be playing Perrin's wolf-dream powers more as visions overlaying the real world instead of extended dream sequences, which also seems like it's easier from a production standpoint but also makes the wolf magic feel more grounded.

and speaking of Aes Sedai ceremonies, I appreciate the lack of gratuitous female nudity. In fact they seem to have upped the gratuitous male nudity quite a bit. The women and queers took over that world and made it their own and I love it

Just, the casual way that the showrunners decided that queer people exist, and also that people fuck without being weird and repressed about it is so refreshing.

speaking of weird repressed sexuality, the design for the Seanchan channeler whatsits is so much more creepy and so much less fetish-y than the books and I love it. (I do also wonder if from a cinematography pov it was decided it was too difficult to have people on leashes and get good camera angles)

Rand in the psych ward was a good touch, it was so nice to see him actually doing things instead of sitting around angsting, and being kind and caring and having a personality, even if there was an ulterior motive. Also having him meet Logain this early instead of waiting twelve books was an excellent choice because I spent those twelve books frothing at the mouth wondering when the two were going to meet; the setup with the scene in the cage and the actual payoff of them meeting for the first time in the books was such a letdown, this was so much more dramatic and fulfilling.

not having Logain at the White Tower is going to make the attack on the white Tower interesting, though. And Min also left. Maybe they'll wind up back there somehow? Because I did like that awkward little travel party. And it throws off my trans channeler fic that I may or may not actually have written down somewhere, but oh well.

I like show!Min a lot, she's a lot sharper and more bitter than book!Min, but she also has even more lesbian energy than RJ's Only Woman In The World Who Wears Pants (Gasp!) and I don't see her pairing well with Rand. But also Rand hasn't actually met any of his love interests, so I'm curious to see how the show decides to play it. Maybe they'll lean into the polycule aspect and have the girls get together with each other too? They do seem to be foreshadowing that (hello Alanna)

Wheel of Time Books: you know that Alanna...has two Warders... two men at her beck and call... if you know what I mean ;)... haha no of course they don't... unless ;) Wheel of Time Show: they fuck. they're fucking. they have bisexual fucking threesomes all the fucking time and they're so fucking horny in front of everyone and we fucking love it. And they bring her snacks.

I kind of wanted to see Mat beat up Galad, but maybe they'll work that in later.

#wheel of time #wheel of time amazon #wot spoilers

[gadunkie]

spiderverse 2 sucked shit and was performative twitter.com fuckery. hi reddit in this rant Im going to talk about why I think the second spiderverse movie gave me a queasy uneasy feeling after I left the theater. spoiler warning and all that.

Ive been seeing a lot of praise for this movie lately and a lot of fan stuff and while that is cool I think spiderverse 2 really doesnt deserve it. to me it feels like baffling performative bullshit where they checked off certain "woke" categories and forgot about everything else. Im bad at formulating rant posts so Im just gonna randomly bring up my feelings on certain things.

ok so first of all the number one thing that pissed me off was the in-movie dialogue of people telling miles, the first black spider-man, that he was never supposed to be spider-man in the first place. that is incredibly tone deaf, especially when the first movie's message was that anyone could be a hero, regardless of who you are. you could argue that this story beat is used to reinforce that message being that miles' reaction to that line is rejection and finding his own way to become spider-man after all. but thats stupid because, again, anyone could be a hero no matter what, even if theyre not supposed to be 'canonically' a spider-man. what this tells me is that theyre going for the same fucking message, again, but this time its padded out in 2 movies rather than the one that weve already seen.

second, and this one was much more brief, there was a disabled spider-man amidst the roster of the multiverse spider-mans whose only line of dialogue was making fun of their own disability. thats some travis mcelroy bullshit, I thought we were past the point of making disabled character's only personality being their disability. to me that was also incredibly tone deaf and just completely unneeded.

third, there was an Indian spider-man by the name Pavitr Prabhakar whose only personality was that he was Indian. of course theres nothing wrong with Indian culture or just being an Indian person, but to me its like if they had a Japanese spider-man and made them only talk about katanas and sushi. theres no way that indian people act like that and constantly boost about their own nation, it just rubs me the wrong way and makes them feel less human.

fourth, that "gwen is trans" shit is utter queerbait, I cant believe anyone is fucking falling for this shit. it literally infuriates me that I see fellow queer people look at the most basic off to the side decoration in a room / police officer's uniform and jump to the conclusion that what we are seeing is trans representation. like sure she could be trans! but it can also be read as her just being an ally, same with her father. "what ally has a trans flag in there room?" are you fucking kidding me? like are you being serious? hey heres famous content creator Ludwig, who is cis and has a trans flag in his room:

fucking anyone, literally anyone could have trans iconography anywhere in their house regardless of their gender. side bonus, heres how you can have a real confirmed trans character in your art without it being bait! - have them taking transition medication in a scene - have them wear gender affirming clothing, like chest binders - have them tell another character that theyre trans - have them literally look into the camera and say "Im trans." crazy how easy it is to do all of these things and yet gwen did none of it! dont fucking search for crumbs and pretend that its a feast.

fifth, theres a character called spider-punk who goes by Hobie and his entire character is being a punk and making fun of The Establishment™ and Capitalism™. I thought he was dumb because it just reminded me that anti-capitalism is just a form of entertainment now and not a real message to start a change.

sixth, there was so much fucking nostalgia pandering and repetitive dialogue. there were many scenes showing footage of older movies, cartoons, or real life actors that were only there to be pointed at the screen by audiences. next, the dialogue was so expository that any time miles' parents were on screen they would only talk about miles and how worried they were about him. I swear to god that 70% of spider-man 2099s dialogue was about his disturbed past and wanting to capture miles. at several times throughout the movie I thought "ok I get it" and hoped that were was something new to be seen in the next 5 minutes, which wasnt the case most of the time.

seventh, evil miles was fucking stupid. you cant just reveal such an easy counterpart villain and expect me to believe that he has any bearing on the story whatsoever. that shit was so laughably bad that I can easily imagine him getting defeated in the same old hero vs villain shit in the next movie. here let me have some fun and say that miles is going to do the most predictable "Im going to fix you to become good" trope only for evil miles to deny it and fuck off forever in some weird way.

anyway this post is already too fucking long so Im just gonna add personal peeves onto it because Im on a roll. I had a hard time paying attention to several fight scenes because they were mixing with too many visual styles, like the vulture scene at the beginning of the movie was too disorienting for me. I think there shouldve been subtitles, sometimes characters were inaudible for me and the audio mixing during some scenes didnt help either, unless there was a slow moment in the film I just couldnt understand what the characters were saying.

I thought the movie sucked so bad that what they got right in certain aspects (cast diversity, parent and child struggles, etc.) felt like nothing to me after how they treated the parts that Ive listed. its like they fucking checked off a Progressive Bingo Sheet and left everything else in the dust.

I left the theater disappointed and feeling worthless because all I felt was that these movies were just trying to sell me something and didnt push for a change like the first one did. what a fucking shit show.

conclusions. if you liked the movie, awesome Im glad, and you should decide for yourself how you feel about it and what it means to you. Im simply just putting my frustrations into a little text post because that is how I feel. Im not in charge of your enjoyment and you should decide that on your own regardless of my opinions. be responsible with your enjoyment.

but I wont, if you try to argue with me on any of these topics then Im blocking you forever and if you dare type "let people enjoy things" on my post then Im killing you,

#gadunka is fucking pissed

[the-path-to-redemption]

Chapter 2 rant will be out later, but I just...God, fucking queer rep in RWBY is a living nightmare and I just have to throw some thoughts out as a queer person.

You have a Nazi lesbian (Coco) who admits to check out women without their acknowledgement behind her sunglasses (ew tf). Another lesbian who's a terrorist (Ilia) and her main motivation was jealousy? Despite being part of an oppressed group? A singular catty gay man (Scarlet), and while that isn't necessarily bad, fucking hell it's still very annoying that he's the only gay person and is just written as an asshole. Background lesbians Saffron and Terra, not bad but again, bare minimum. A trans woman whose VA was treated like dirt. And 3 nonbinary characters, two of which are talking animals.

Like, how many characters does RWBY has? And this is it? This is the line up for queer rep that got you all foaming at the mouth for? This is below minimum effort, and it took them YEARS to actually confirm any of them as queer. RT was an independent company, they're not The Owl House or Legend of Korra where queer rep is constantly being squandered by higher ups, they just didn't want to.

And Blake and Yang...fucking hell. Preface, I have no problem with the Butch-Femme relationship between wlw characters. That's real life, I've seen plenty of gay couples where they didn't have a problem addressing themselves according to heterosexual labels (i.e. a gay man calling himself the wife). It still doesn't erase the fact that they're gay, and it's part of the identity.

What I fucking hate, HATE, is that neither Blake or Yang were written as the masculine queer woman initially. Both of them are femme, or were femme, but ever since the baiting begin Yang has been designated as the "man" of the relationship. This just felt extremely weird, since now you have Blake barely taking care of herself in dire situations and Yang standing up to her. Not very "we protect each other" like they claimed in Vol 6. Queer representation should not take away the characters' already established traits for them to be queer, that's lazy writing that reduces them to being nothing more than their sexuality.

All of this felt hollow; the queer characters are stereotypes or just assholes, and aside from their sexuality there's little to no substance to them. If you want substance, you have to spend time and money looking at supplementary works instead of those substances being written in the show.

What was Scarlet's life like? His relationship with Sage and Neptune, or his complicated thoughts about Sun? What about Saffron? What does she think about the rest of her family? Of the Arc family name like Jaune did? Speaking of Jaune, it's so easy to just let him be gender nonconforming back in Vol 2. But no, he must be masculine because God forbid a man wears a dress without transphobic jokes being made at his expense.

TLDR: RWBY's queer rep is boring at best, abysmal at worse. The characters felt hollow, and the effort that went into making them queer is nonexistent. And personally speaking? If South Park managed to support gay rep in the 90s, an independent company that created a show decades later have no excuse of not trying to say "this character is gay" from the get go.

#rwde #long post #and the majority of RWBY's queer rep are women #queer men doesn't exist here #or else they might get laughed out of existence #but ya'll ain't ready for that convo

[boylikeanangel]

hi! I'm super curious about why you headcanon ed as transfem. no hate, just wondering!

hii omg thanks for your interest!! I'm gonna apologise in advance because I have a horrible feeling this is gonna be really long and disorganised cuz there is so much to cover especially when you've put as much thought and time into creating a whole series-wide transfem reading of ed as my friends and I have and it all feels like completely vital information but I'll do my best to put it succinctly!! (again I'm gonna be using she/her pronouns for ed throughout this whole post, so disclaimer for that to avoid confusion <3)

so first of all I think it's important to recognise that in a lot of ways our flag means death is a study of and a deconstruction of masculinity, and furthermore a criticism of western ideals of masculinity and how it's inherently toxic and how that pressures men into acting a certain way, particularly how it affects queer men's freedom to present as their authentic selves. it denounces these rigid ideals of what "being a man" is and celebrates unconventional forms of masculinity. most obviously with this we see stede struggle with not fitting into these expectations placed on him and how his character arc is largely in part about coming to embrace his masculinity on his own terms as something fundamentally queer - he defines his masculinity by how he as a man loves another man. and we see blackbeard's crew as a whole uphold "ideal" masculinity, but fang and ivan are able to break away from that performance by being accepted by the revenge crew and we see who they are as people outside of those restraints, and we see izzy try desperately to uphold the ideals of hypermasculinity by constantly throwing his weight around, and most importantly, by asserting dominance and aggression over men that he believes do not fit into those ideals. he has to uphold the honour of "blackbeard" (this world's glowing standard of masculinity) by beating down men who don't fit into his definition of what a man should be. by recognising that the show as a whole is constantly telling us that the kind of masculinity perpetuated by the myth of blackbeard and piracy as a whole is fundamentally toxic, some really interesting questions get raised about ed and what masculinity means to her and how she feels about being the posterchild for it.

to put it simply, she hates it. it's fucking suffocating. it's absolutely destroying her. "blackbeard" is a prison for her, she is literally introduced to us as a legend (the ideal of masculinity) of the pirating world (a culture of toxic masculinity) disillusioned with her entire existence, and is just wishing to be anything else. "blackbeard" embodies everything defined as masculine in this world, and we learn immediately that ed is absolutely nothing like what everyone would believe her to be, and that she hates having to be like that all the time. masculinity has never been anything more than a performance for her. ed's entire arc is about her having an identity crisis and trying to understand what being "blackbeard" and being "edward" means to her, and when blackbeard is inherently tied to a hypermasculine gender expression, which she openly hates performing, and on the other hand, she takes so much delight in getting to be "edward" instead, you can really start to see the pieces coming together about her gender identity I think. when "blackbeard" is synonymous with "Man" (with a capital M) in this show, to immediately tell us that ed HATES being blackbeard sure does make you think!!!

getting into the events of the actual show now, I think honestly all you need to do to see ed's arc as a trans narrative is to go into it with an open mind and just like. allow yourself to read into things through that lens while you're watching. I cannot stress enough how EASY it is to read ed and her actions as inherently trans once you decide you're gonna try to see it like that on a rewatch. take ed and stede's first official meeting, for example: stede wakes to find ed sitting over him, and ed assumes stede's gonna recognise her as blackbeard immediately, only he doesn't. by not assuming she is blackbeard, stede inadvertently opens up a window of opportunity for ed to define herself as something different for once, to be known to One person as the person she actually wants to be. so she introduces herself as "ed", her REAL name, and I really cannot see this as anything except a trans person taking the leap into trying out a new identity with the first person who gives them the opportunity. and THEN stede leads her into his closet, where ed gets to realise her interest in fashion for the first time, and then reality comes crashing through the walls and reminds ed that she's not out to anyone else yet. she has to tell stede she's not who she said she was, if you'll forgive my phrasing (because that IS who she is, but she has to tell stede now that that's not the whole truth of the matter. she has to do damage control now). and. this is literally a coming out scene. "I'm blackbeard" is literally her saying "I'm not who I told you I was". and the beauty of this is that stede doesn't treat her any different after making this discovery. he continues to call her ed. he knows more about her now, but that doesn't change who she is and he continues to respect the fact she introduced herself as "ed" and recognises this is the name she actually wants to be called. (the scene after this where they swap clothes and stede gets to be The Ideal Man for a day and ed gets to separate herself from that, literally giving her masculinity over to someone that doesn't believe he's masculine enough, is extra lovely in a t4t transfem ed and transmasc stede reading but that's a post for another day). meeting stede is literally her first step into finding herself and finally having the freedom to explore her gender identity and expression, safe in the knowledge that stede and by extension his crew will accept her.

there's myriad other moments that scream "trans" to me about ed, to name a few: referring to god as "she" but also being very clearly calling herself god at the same time (she's literally dropping hints that she wants to be called "she"), referring to herself as "a young waif" (which whilst can mean both a boy or a girl, is commonly only used to describe girls), telling izzy "actually I do want to be called edward from now on" (blackbeard is literally her deadname babes!!!). but the transcoding really does kick itself into high gear in the finale. I'll run through why I see her arc in the final two episodes as a blatantly trans narrative for you:

before I go on, it's important to keep in mind that "blackbeard" is a performance of masculinity. "blackbeard" is this world's shining example of what it means to be a man. "beard" being the operative word here. it's the most obvious visual signifier of masculinity. it's literally in the name - blackbeard's beard is THE thing that makes him who he is. so when ed is finally torn away from piracy and the first thing she does is shave her beard off, what does this say? especially when she isn't even bothered by it. in fact, she's happy to be rid of that persona! despite her circumstances, she's happier in the few scenes at the academy than we've ever seen her. a literal weight has been lifted along with the beard, she's lighter, less nervous, more expressive, literally contented to just be allowed to be "edward" for the first time in her life. she has finally broken free of her perpetual performance of hypermasculinity. the loss the facial hair is a clear and obvious way of showing to us, visually, this change in her mindset about her identity. she doesn't have to hide anymore. and then when she comes back to the revenge, even after having her heart broken, she continues going by ed. she's had a taste of freedom and she doesn't want to give it up. she renounces the name "blackbeard" entirely and starts going by edward exclusively.

but of course, this doesn't last. I'm gonna have to link to another post here, which was actually THE post that got me first thinking about transfem ed, a great breakdown of the "avalanche" scene by @/all-chickens-are-trans here, which explains how the confrontation with izzy episode 10 was about izzy mocking ed for not performing masculinity to his standards and literally triggering ed's detransition better than I ever could. and yes, to clarify - this is ed detransitioning by becoming blackbeard again. there's SO much visual symbolism already in this scene that's been pointed out, but the bits I wanna focus on are 1) ed LITERALLY DRAWING HER BEARD BACK ON (the thing that defines her masculinity in her eyes!!), which calls back to lucius in episode 2 saying "not all beards are actual beards". in that context he was talking about jim's fake beard hiding the fact they're not a man, and an implied proverbial beard that lucius probably had to hide his gayness. if we consider "beards" within the show as a wider metaphor for hiding an intrinsic part of yourself, whether it be pertaining to your gender or your sexuality, ed shaving hers off and then drawing it back on to play the role of blackbeard after she's verbally abused for not being masculine enough really does tell you a lot; and 2) something that dyl @lucius-spriggs pointed out about the shot of her strapping her gun back onto her belt - throughout the show and in several promo images the placement of ed's gun has made for some....very comical, it has to be said, phallic imagery, but when you consider the gun as a visual stand-in for that, her literally strapping it back onto herself after being without her weapons for the whole episode is. chilling. she's literally suiting up to "become a man" again. if you view this scene as one dealing with ed's transness and izzy attacking her for it, the "there he is" line becomes so haunting. "I serve blackbeard, not edward" is literally izzy saying ed is only safe as long as she puts back on that beard and starts performing masculinity to his standards again.

I guess the main point I want to make here is that ed's character arc largely centres around her identity crisis, namely that she doesn't really have a concrete sense of identity because she's only ever been allowed to be "blackbeard" her entire adult life, a suffocating performance of ideal masculinity that leaves no room for exploration of any other kinds of gender presentation. you see her constantly struggle with her lack of sense of self throughout the show with the way she throws around different names and personas for herself - "jeff the accountant", "the kraken", etc. - and then, in the finale, landing on "edward" after finally being given the chance to fully embrace that name when she gets sent to the academy. edward is who she wants to be, and to see her finally find an identity that makes her happy and feels like HER is so heartwarming after understanding in such visceral, heartwrenching detail how lost she felt when she couldn't perform "blackbeard" anymore despite the pressure to keep doing so, and it's so distressing to watch her be attacked for that and be forced back into being something she desperately does not want to be after she got a taste of that freedom. I guess what I'm saying is that when you consider ed's character arc and subsequent identity crisis in conjunction with the wider themes this show has of deconstructing masculinity, lifting up feminine men and trans people, and embracing queerness in all its forms, it becomes all the more compelling when you allow yourself to read her arc as a trans narrative.

I'd also like to clarify here for those confused that I'm not saying I think ed is a trans woman! there's a huge distinction between trans woman and transfem, and ed being transfem does not invalidate or take away from her identity as a gay man. transfem gay men DO exist, gay men have embraced overt femininity and done things like use she/her pronouns and medically transition for a long time and that doesn't stop them from still being gay men. what's important to understand here that in the world presented to us in the show, "blackbeard" is synonymous with "man" (he's literally the definition of what a man should be according to the rules of piracy), and by ed renouncing that identity that makes her arc inherently transfeminine. she's renouncing her masculinity and the performance of it. this is also why she's going by edward still instead of an entirely new (read: female) name, and why that is still empowering for her even if it's technically a man's name. "edward" is not necessarily female now, it's just the person she has always been underneath that hypermasculine facade, which is someone who just happens to love femininity. when she says she's happy to just be edward, all she means is that she's finally free of having to pretend to be a man, or at least what her world considers manly. "edward" loves doing laundry and singing and wearing pink and building blanket forts and kissing. it doesn't mean she's a woman now, just that she finally has the freedom to embrace something other than hypermasculinity. it's more about the empowerment of her breaking away from a constant performance of masculinity. femininity is empowering for her because it's something she's never been able to explore before, something so far removed from everything she's been forced to be for as long as she can remember. that doesn't make her any less of a gay man!

I think I totally failed at the whole "succinct" thing here so I'm gonna wrap it up now but if anyone has any follow up questions or wants to hear more of my thoughts then please don't hesitate to ask. I also think the likelihood of something like this ever being confirmed out loud in the show is pretty low, so if you're still confused or you simply can't see it I don't think you have anything to worry about. this is just one way of reading her character that makes a lot of sense to me and I get really emotional thinking about. considering it's 1717, the extent to which a canonically transfem ed could "transition" would be pretty limited, though I think it would be neat to see her playing around with pronouns and trying out different styles of dressing next season if they decided to lean more into this. basically I just think it's a really interesting and compelling way to read her character and you actually do not have to do any work to see it past just going into the show with an open mind. I love transfem ed. she's my best friend and I hope I inspired you to read more into this idea yourself <3

#thanks to the besties in the discord for helping me work on this and betaing it for me ilysm #our flag means death #meta tag #ask

[dichromaticdyke]

re: skwisgaar attraction myth debunk turned feminist critique (AMAZING post btw) - feel free to ignore/not respond if it's too much/incomprehensible (english is fake)/rambly

honestly i feel like said post gets into the lesser discussed aspect of the mtl fandom as i believe a lot of us want to view it as different than other fandoms with a majority male cast; but it's not. this is a fandom full of misogyny-affected folks, especially of tme persuasion, who never outgrew or if new, elect to partake in, ye olde fandom habits of internalized misogyny shining through like it's their goddamn guiding light.

i dont know exactly how to phrase this in a demographically correct way, but it feels like despite the mtl fandom being overwhelmingly queer and a lot of the misogyny-affected tme folks being trans... the "i'm not like other girls" mentality was not broken out of; people decided "i am not a woman" and suddenly unpacking internalized misogyny wasn't a thing they decided they had to do anymore!

like. it feels like mtl fandom is about being "quirky" and shipping dethklok together but god forbid you wanna focus on the women in the show; abigail, amber, trindle, etc. it's... a tale as old as time (as those of us who have been in fandom spaces for a while would know) and it's so fucking saddening.

i've seen media analysis and critique of this show (MOSTLY YOURS!!) but more often than not it feels like the fandom doesn't want to delve into that either; they like mtl on the surface level. because it's edgy. because it's metal. because it's funny. because they find xyz member of the cast sexy. and i feel like this interwined internalized misogyny being projected out via mtl fandom behaviors with this complete lack of regard for the quality aspects of the show and the depths of the characters within it... i dunno. as i said, it's saddening.

...again, i hope this wasn't too word salad-like, or rambly, or long, or anything, but oh my god your post got the gears turning in my brain head so full of all the thoughts ever-

and yet again, AMAZING analysis, incredible dedication, and fantastic feminist critique.

don’t worry darling this wasn’t too long of an ask and i find it VERY intriguing.

because yeah i do absolutely fall into both camps of this to an extent. i love shipping the boys and talking about them, because i do love them as characters, but yeah it’s so easy to fall into the trap of not caring about the female characters in the show. and i would agree, again to an extent, that the female characters were not given much care or time from the show to properly be explored in a meaningful way (though, how much of that was a deliberate choice by the crew and how much of that just happened due to adult swim meddling in the latter years, we’ll probably never know). i always find it interesting, for example, how fandom will latch onto magnus but not care about abigail, despite abigail having more screentime and having a major impact on the plot of the show (had the band never broke up over her, salacia wouldn’t have attacked when he did, forcing them to finally learn about the prophecy and the doomstar arguably before they were ready, AND without salacia’s attack, the revengencers wouldn’t have been able to catch dethklok at the funeral and kidnap toki and abigail). of course with abigail, it’s not just misogyny playing a role there, but racism too, though luckily there have been some people calling out fandom treatment of her.

i’ve talked a bit before about how much it sucks that abigail wasn’t given really anything to work with, but it also makes sense given that the show is from dethklok’s point of view and they don’t really care about her either. that’s why it feels so strange (and SHOULD feel strange) to see nathan proposing to abigail in aotd—we didn’t know anything about her because he didn’t know anything about her, and that was kind of the whole point of that arc in the movie. women are objects to dethklok, and because of that, they become objects in the show, and i do think the statements “this is a deliberate critique of misogyny reinforced both by powerful men and metal culture” AND “this is a result of the crew failing to create and integrate meaningful female characters into the show” can both co-exist. honestly, i think mtl has a lot to say about gender (idk how much of that was intentional, but i’ve been thinking about it for a While and want to make a long analysis post or video about it at some point).

regarding the fandom spaces i mean. fuck, you’re talking to a decently popular lesbian mtl creator. i have one foot in the camp of being a misogyny-affected person (tme also, for reference) who makes up a majority of the fandom, but also the other foot is in the “not attracted to men” camp. as much as i like the shipping and smut writing for funsies, i genuinely feel like there’s more to this show than most people give it credit for. i have written so many analyses about it (with plans for more) for a reason. i’ve been in online fandom spaces for about half my life now, and no other piece of media has made me have this many fits of divine madness.

all this to say, yeah, it’s a silly adult swim show, i’m sure 95% of what we see on screen we’re not meant to think too much about. but the reality is that, the text belongs to the readers once it is out in the world, and the way readers respond to it can reflect internalized biases or thoughts. that’s not always the case! sometimes i just wanna see two silly long-haired men kiss because i think it would fix them. but you don’t leave your biases and oppressive thoughts at the door once you enter fandom. and i certainly don’t leave my literature MA or gender studies degree at the door either!

#ask.mj #beloved anon #💉 anon #💌 #putting this in my love letter/testimonials tag bc i wasn’t rlly expecting a response like this to that post so thank u ❤️

[lolotr]

10 fandoms 10 characters tag game

rules: name 10 of your favourite characters from 10 different fandoms, then tag 10 people to do the same

Thank you @courfaeriedust for tagging me!! It's been so long since I have been tagged in something like this that when I saw the post on my dash I didn't even bother to check. It took the notification for me to figure it out lol

Here we go, in no particular order:

1. Kaleidotrope (podcast). I, too, will begin here, since it's been four years and I'm still not over it. As much as it pains me, I think I will pick Drew, but mostly because I resonate with him so goddamn much. One of the running themes of this list will be trauma.

2. Call Me Katie (web series). Bates, it's obviously Bates, it could never be anyone other than Bates. My disaster bi, the boy who helped me start to realize I'm queer, with his dumbass puns, his neediness, his obsession with vlogging and pizza... I could go on forever.

3. The Adventure Zone - Balance (podcast). Hoo boy. How do I... Magnus? Or Lup? I'm gonna go with Magnus, if only because he is the one who never fails to make me cry. Travis (and Griffin) does such beautiful things with this character and role plays BRILLIANTLY. well, they all do. gosh jeez this is hard

4. Lord of the Rings (books, movies). Never mind, this is super easy. Samwise Gamgee. Next fucking question.

5. Rusty Quill Gaming Podcast. AHHHHHGGGGDKEKXJDI Zolf or Sasha???? At this very moment Sasha. She just-- I just-- my stabbing girl. My damaged, stabbing girl.

6. Percy Jackson/Heroes of Olympus (book serieses). (These are the two in the verse I've read so far.) It feels like a cop out, but I think Percy. It was between him and Annabeth, and I absolutely love their dynamic, whether it's before or after dating. But Percy is so smart and capable in certain ways and so utterly stupid in others (I have a theory that both he and Annabeth take hits to their mental stats when they are within thirty feet of one another). He's loyal to a fault, he's obsessed with blue food, he fought the god of war at 12 and won, he dove into Tartarus rather than be separated from his girlfriend/best friend again, he even has ADHD. Truly the character of all time.

7. Avatar: The Last Airbender (TV show). Zuko. I love the whole gaang but his character is done so beautifully and complexly. Like that is how you do a redemption arc, people. From the very beginning. And you do not make it easy for this sixteen year old who has committed war crimes, no you don't.

8. The Hunger Games (book series). Peeta. I live that he is optimistic, kind, and principled, but not naive, oblivious, or weak. His flaws are the same as his strengths: he's self sacrificing, self effacing, loyal. Everyone rubs Katniss's nose in the fact that he's good except him. But also, he's not perfect, and there's a lot of complexity tied to the fact that everyone thinks he's better than Katniss in every way, but he's mostly just better at hiding the darker parts of him. I love that we see nothing but the darkest parts and he's able to come back.

9. Dames and Dragons/LegendLark - first campaign (podcast). Fran. Again, I adore everyone, including NPCs, but I have such a soft spot for her. Noel plays her so beautifully and isn't afraid to make her jarring, make her part of the inner conflict of the team. I love how she's grown, and I'm excited and scared to see how the show wraps up.

10. Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV show). This is tough, because some people's characterization varies so wildly sometimes, but... Giles. I'm going with my sexy dad who cares so fucking much about his adopted child(ren).

I had a lot of trouble with this list, because I've been in fandom since I knew what it was. I picked things that I still enjoy, and also things that I still enjoy talking about/analyzing. Because that's how I show love.

PIKACHU, I CHOOSE YOU: @all-chickens-are-trans @chaotic-gay-is-my-alignment @sonseulsoleil @yeahdefnot @greatestvoyageinhistoryofplastic @rovermcfly @the-vaudevillain @anywhoozles @wire-smith @cantdance anyone who wants to! Sorry if I tagged anyone who's been tagged already, I was doing this on mobile and couldn't be bothered to check

#Long post #Tag game #Fandoms #Kaleidotrope #Taz balance #Btvs #dames and dragons #Pjo #Cmk #Lotr #Atla #Thg

[dirkification]

Okay I'm not going through the tag anymore because I keep making myself mad when I'm just trying to find fun things

Vent under cut (Spto spoilers and general queer discourse shit)

"Wallace didn't carry the show y'all just hate women"

What about y'all just love men??? Like Wallace was fucking GREAT in spto and literally does keep taking over situations on purpose

I wouldn't say he carries the show but if you're into dudes and especially if you're mlm it is extremely easy to focus on whatever shenanigans he's up to instead of the main plot

Which is fine!

Focusing on a gay man more than women in a cartoon is fine!

Like I get Ramona is the main character of this show and there are some other great women characters and friendships but just because people prefer Wallace over them doesn't mean they hate women

I blocked that person I'm just

God I do need that social media break

I'm literally feeling so paranoid whenever I look at any queer content like oh no people are going to talk shit about trans mascs or mlm or afab nb people or something and while I feel justified hating this post in particular, there are some I am *not* justified in feeling so stressed over, like people hc'ing Ramona and Scott as trans fem instead of trans masc or getting too annoyed at people insisting Roxie/Kim is canon somehow even though they are explicitly not into each other in canon

I've been trying to follow more transasc and mlm and nblm blogs so I can surround myself with the stuff I want to see but I'm still obviously dealing with idk I guess trauma from being in an environment where I didn't trust my own feelings and experiences as a trans masc into dudes because any problems I had with how we were talking about was transmisogyny and lesbophobia and it took me so long to not only realize the people saying that shit were assholes but also the foundation of everything they were saying was wrong and so many people are still wrapped up in that radfem adjacent bullshit that I just see it *everywhere* now and I'm afraid to get into any new queer spaces or content like every space is just going to be Homestuck Twitter 2019 all over again or I'll find out no I was actually terrible and wrong this whole time!!!

To the point I'm having this long rant because of Scott fucking Pilgrim

Ughhhh

#jax yacks #vent

[hella1975]

Me with my internalized transphobia upon hearing what the new chapter is gonna be about: oh god. This is gonna destroy me isn’t it?

Me after reading it: I’m fine I’m so normal and okay and totally. Having normal emotions. None even I’m fine. They’ve only read about love in a thousand different stories and it’s never looked like them. That’s cool and fine actually. Unrelatable and fine. Didn’t take those words to heart at all.

Seriously though I know it’s was a gay thing and not a trans thing but it’s so intertwined. Being bi was easy for me but being trans was something I buried for 10 years and still do and it’s just like. I’ve read, I’ve watched, I’ve listened, and no one looks like me in these stories. And if they do they die or they are villains or they’re boring or background characters with no characterizations. That fucks with you. I didn’t realize exactly how much shame I carry about it until Zuko and Kanut were talking about theirs and ugh. I know in my head that it’s okay but I also know it’s something to be swept under the rug and hushed and privated. I know that I’m only safe in certain places. This has turned sad, my bad, but anyway. I saw myself in this chapter and I wanna thank you for writing it, it was very well done and you can tell you thought about it genuinely. Bato talking to Kanut about how much he loves despite it being unromantic/sexual killed me too. Also! I agree that current terms and labels are jarring to read in fantasy settings, I’m writing a book and I chose to have those labels at the front and just talk about them in the stories but not have the labels said cause it’s. Idk something about it is so weird to read. I love that you agree with that I haven’t seen anyone else with that opinion

ill answer the end bit first before we get into some serious things lol but yes! idk i just read things sometimes in various fandoms where modern lingo is used interchangeably with their universe and it just feels so out of place? like it feels like reading a sci-fi story and suddenly some guy uses the full latin name for a plant like in what world would that just be common knowledge lmao

as for your other comments, im so glad that you could see yourself in this chapter even if it might have opened up some wounds that were easier closed. i was very careful with the dialogue of ch40 and it saw me writing and backspacing and writing again like a million times for each sentence, because it was massively important to me that this wasn't just the 'zuko is gay and kanut is aroace' chapter, but instead the queer chapter. there's a really worrying trend amongst the tiktok generation atm that really sees queer identities pitted against each other. there's no nuance or intersectionality and it becomes 'bisexuals cannot relate to lesbians' and 'aspec cannot relate to other sexualities because i have a fucked up view that queerness is inherently sexual and dont realise how much that shows my age' and 'trans is a gender thing while gay is a sexuality thing so they dont overlap' etc etc. whereas in reality, and i tried to show this in ch40, the thing with being queer that underlies so much of our experiences is always that sense of otherness. zuko can painfully relate to the shit kanut says despite their experiences being incredibly different, one being gay and one being aroace, and it's literally just because they are both queer identities. and you know what? as much as i wanted the dialogue to be perfect so i tweaked it a lot, it was actually an incredibly easy thing to do. i found it very easy to write a mlm character and an aroace character despite me myself being an allo wlw. and im not saying my rep is perfect because it would be my honest to god worst nightmare to be put on a pedestal like that bc i KNOW i'll make mistakes and already have done, but it doesn't change the fact that the basic theme of queerness was very easy to tap into.

i guess what im saying is that being trans is a different thing to what we tackled this chapter, but like you said, it's also not. there's a massive community here for you with open arms, and that's not going to be a miracle cure, but you deserve to know from people who get it that it’s not something to be swept under the rug or hushed or privated. unfortunately, you're right about only being safe in certain places, but this is one of them and you will find others. queerness is beautiful and it makes you you, and that's never something to be ashamed of x

#sending love anonstie i hope you're doing okay x #ask #taob asks

[calliopesburn]

So you mentioned queer film and docs in some of your tags, may I ask if you have any specific recommendations?

thank u for asking i have SO MANY!!!!!!!!!!

i haven't actually checked but im 99% sure all of these films were definitely directed and likely also written by queer people; for context this top list is all new so look for film festivals that might be screening or streaming these virtually / below i added some older films that are more easy to find

New from the past year or two:

the one i mentioned in the post is one i definitely recommend - it's called Nelly & Nadine (doc) - two women fall in love in a concentration camp, survive, and live happily together - the documentary gets made when a queer grandkid finds old stuff and is like hrmmmm

Rule 34 - one of my favorite films ever honestly - a black sex worker (in brazil) gets into criminal law school (paid for by her sex work) and witnesses her own life and identity being constantly debated in the classroom while continuing her sex work and beginning to explore BDSM at night - she becomes increasingly erratic throughout the film in a way that culminates beautifully (talk about a chaos queer) an incredibly commentary on women's agency

Before I Change My Mind - i think it takes place in the 60s - a non-binary pre-teen kid moves from america to a small canadian town and struggles to make friends for .02 seconds before they set their sights on their crush and become a member of their toxic friend group - puts a whole new spin on 'coming of age'

Compulsus - a woman starts hunting down men who sexually assault women (from the descrip it says it never shows the actual assault that leads her to start striking back, only her committing violence)

Tahara - first of all the stop motion kiss scene still has me reeling. two jewish bffs attend a funeral and things get real awkward when they kiss 'for fun'

Framing Agnes (doc) - gender case studies from a 50's UCLA clinic are re-enacted by icons like Angelica Ross - incredible history

Wildhood - a two-spirit teen falls for another indigenous boy while he journeys with his brother to find their mom

Anything's Possible - Billy Porter's directorial debut - a muslim boy falls for a trans girl and takes his shot even though he knows people will freak out (and they do) but it's really affirming and supportive and lovely and funny <3

Esther Newton Made Me Gay (doc) - ok wanna talk about queer history?? Esther Newton was the first person to ever write about drag culture from an anthropological perspective PERIOD. i think if i remember correctly she was fired from parsons, and was on very thin ice for a long time with her career - but even still she wrote and paved the way for queer academia - writing about fire island, cherry grove, the drag scene, and more!!!!! she also identifies as a butch lesbian/between genders and this film is so incredible for the lesbians - you really need to hear her talk about gender, about butchness and femmeness - ALSO you get to see her childhood growing up in the early 1900's as a queer person and it's incredible, you'll cry but like in a GOOD cathartic way

Sleep With Me (series) - a soapy sapphic thai romance between two disabled women - one in a wheelchair and another with a rare sleep disorder. this will literally give you every cute soapy sapphic moment you could ask for!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girl Picture - lesbians watch this one!!!!!!!! this is a ROMANCE!!!!!! there were scenes where i was like omg!!!!!!! when you never realize how desperately ur craving a certain style - just watch the trailer please ; also asexuals u should watch this one too :) (just to be clear though the asexual character is straight, not the sapphic romance)

Mama Bears (doc) - this doc will also make u cry but in a really fucking good way. this is a doc on christian parents who used to be conservative and homophobic before changing perspectives after their kids come out. most notable is Kai (though she also chooses the name Esther for herself <3, based on her favorite person in the Bible), a trans girl who talks about coming out to her mom as a girl as young as 3 years old, and in spite of the abuse she was put through, she kept saying it and her mom eventually realized she could either lose her "son" forever, or accept and love her daughter. im tearing up writing this - her mom gave up her entire family to literally save her daughters life - and she did.

Nana's Boys - two black men are about to get engaged when the city goes on lockdown and their relationship is put to the test - truths come out and the gorgeous twists and turns of their relationship really shows the gentleness and supportiveness of queer relationships (it's called nana's boys because they were both raised by their grandmas <3)

Unidentified Objects - a lovely film about two neighbors who take an unexpected road trip - their lives of course changing forever as a result. one of the characters is a gay little person who's mourning the death of a close friend and the other is a sex worker who is looking for the aliens who took her when she was a kid (yes that's literally the plot) it's wonderfully well written and has one of those endings that'll send you reeling

New - haven't seen but on my list:

The First Fallen - a narrative story that follows a group a friends as the first wave of the AIDS epidemic approaches in Peru <3

All the Beauty and the Bloodshed (doc) - you'll likely hear about this as its Laura Poitras' new film, it's about Nan Goldin

Stupid for You - a sapphic girl musical????????????????????

Way Down - an episodic on a bunch of friends trying to be musicians - the lead is non-binary in a romance with various ladies and i think everyone else in the band is queer too

The Blue Caftan - a tailor in morocco lives happily closeted with his wife until they hire a sexy assistant

The Inspection - a gay man enters the military and finds unexpected support and family

El Houb - can only remember that it's a muslim guy who comes out to his dad but is a dark comedy (he literally runs into the closet at a point in the film)

My Emptiness and I - a newly out transfemme woman navigates life and dating and surgery

Moneyboys - two gay men in i think taiwan?

so in general i highly recommend paying attention to queer film festivals - newfest, frameline, and outfest are the major US ones (they only stream in the US but im pretty sure you can use a vpn) inside out is a canadian one; most of them stream now!!!! like 80% of their films are available to stream for a short duration so sign up for their email lists and mark their festivals on your calendars because if you pay attention to these you'll start to see actual queer stories written and directed by queer people!!!!!!!!

also consider watching shorts programs - some of the most impactful films ive been seeing have been shorts (there's one called Dress Up that has been glued into the back of my skull for like 2 months) and shorts are basically seeing into the future of queer film and a lot of them are amazing so highly recommend!!!!!!!

-

For things currently streaming or easy to find and download:

Fantasy of the Girls (2017/2018 depending where you look) thrilled to list this one as it's actually the film that made me realize im a lesbian :) full film is also on YT

The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love dir Maria Maggenti (1995)

Saving Face (2000) and The Half of It - dir Alice Wu

The Watermelon Woman (1996)

Hedwig and the Angry Inch (late 90s i think)

Fire (1996)

Desert Hearts (1985)

The Velvet Vampire - feels like jennifer's body but in 1971 with a vampire who wants to have sex/kill both ppl in a married couple (dir. by a woman; haven't seen this yet though)

Chutney Popcorn (1999)

Paris is Burning (1990)

Brother to Brother (2004) (anthony mackie)

Pariah

Portrait of a Lady on Fire

The Miseducation of Cameron Post (a sad one but chloe moretz dated the girl from the film and the director is queer - incredible film)

Lingua Franca

Fire Island

Naz & Maalik

The Obituary of Tunde Johnson

Firstness

Firebird

See You Then

Ammonite

No Hard Feelings

Shiva Baby

Flee

Passing

--

so in general i highly recommend paying attention to queer film festivals - newfest, frameline, and outfest are the major US ones (they only stream in the US but im pretty sure you can use a vpn) inside out is a canadian one; most of them stream now!!!! like 80% of their films are available to stream for a short duration so sign up for their email lists and mark their festivals on your calendars because if you pay attention to these you'll start to see actual queer stories written and directed by queer people!!!!!!!!

also consider watching shorts programs - some of the most impactful films ive been seeing have been shorts (there's one that has been glued into the back of my skull for like 2 months) and shorts are basically seeing into the future of queer film and a lot of them are amazing so highly recommend!!!!!!!

#hope this helps!!!!!! #watch queer film!!!!!!!! #queer film #long post

[queerregulusablack]

Heylo, looking for a 3rd point of view and you are my favourite blog XD, no pressure to answer though! 1. Why do many fics (AU & Canon Compliant), under Jegulus tag, write abt suic** or heartbroken Reg when his relationship with James ends and he is left for Lily? I understand the appeal of Angst/Tragedy but it's deeply unsettling to see the many fics with this narration/tags (browsed through ao3 unfiltered foolishly). And to find a fic where Reg leaves James for his own wellbeing is rare

2. Is it Jegulus /Jily if this kind of fic is written frm Reg's POV but there are barely any Jegulus moment? These are one-shots or few chapters fics. As a Regulus fan, I may be letting my love for him cloud my judgement. But seeing how he is treated, even just browsing through the summary/tags, makes me curse in my head. And my heart hurt. From Nearly Anti Lily n James

Thank you!

Honestly I... really wish I could tell you. Don't get me wrong I love angst! I show how much I love a character predominantly by putting them through the Horrors. But I do it with the intention of having them be comforted to hell and back afterwards. Sad endings hurt my feelings; I want the satisfaction of happiness at the end, of a light at the end of the tunnel. For me, angst is only therapeutic if there's a recovery period afterwards.

And I mean sometimes the angst makes the happy parts that much sweeter.

But the habit in this fandom to have Regulus end a relationship with James/be left by him and then immediately fall to suicidal depression does, at times, grind my gears. Because I understand the appeal of 'boy who never felt love before finds it', and I understand writing it as being devastating for him to then lose it, especially in situations where James either leaves him for Lily or moves very quickly onto her instead; but like... that's not my Regulus.

My Reg is a survivor, and more than that, in a world where James leaving him for Lily is even a possibility, he spends their relationship... almost anticipating it. Bracing himself for it. He's got a whole lot of experience of not being loved right, and some very raw experience of being abandoned, so he'd be prepared for it to happen with James; maybe even paranoid. And falling apart isn't useful. But also, the idea of Regulus relying to thoroughly on James that without him he genuinely wants to kill himself really is antithetical to my Reg too, because he's an independent person, and he'd never let himself become that reliant on another human being! Not when he knows how easy it is for them to leave him.

To be clear, I say 'my Reg' because he's barely more than an anecdote in canon, so really we're all making this shit up as we go, and no one man's Regulus is better than any other (with the exception of trans!Reg who is obviously peak and cannot be beaten). Like this is a personal preference thing, people can write him how they want.

But for me, that kind of spiral doesn't vibe with my understanding of his character. For me, more than suicidal, Regulus' first instinct would be to get angry. But that's a story for another day.

From a fandom meta perspective? My dude we are all so fucked up.

Like, this fandom is a magnet for depressed queers the world over. And while on the one hand this leads to a lot of very nice content, because the world sucks enough so we may as well write a sweeter version of it, at the same time a lot of people deal with their feelings by putting it into their art; and a lot of us are real depressed! Not just sad, or melancholy; clinically fucking depressed.

And a lot of writers project that onto our favourite sadboi Reggie.

I have no argument to make about how healthy vs unhealthy it is. I think it should be tagged appropriately at all times, but past that, write whatever the fuck you want. But I do, personally, tend to steer away from the truly miserable fic out there.

I still haven't returned to Choices and don't think I will. It's beautifully written, but it does leave me feeling like all my insides have been scooped out, and I'd find that hard to read even with the promise of an alive and happy Regulus at the end; which Choices does not have, being canon compliant.

As for your second question:

I think if it's from Regulus' POV, his emotions dictate the appropriate relationship tag. If he spends the entire fic never touching James, never speaking a word to him, a Jegulus ship tag is still appropriate if throughout it is clear that he has feelings for him/is interested, and if those feelings are the focus of the fic.

The points at which it becomes tricky are like... okay, so you're asking about Jegulus, but there's a trend in the Moonseeker tag for there to be fics tagged RemusxRegulus that are about the aftermath of the prank, during which Remus screws around with Regulus to get back at Sirius. By the end of almost all of them, Remus and Sirius are reconciled; and the narrative throughout is entirely about Remus acting on his anger at Sirius, not him acting on any feelings for Regulus.

Which makes it not Moonseeker. And means putting the tag in the relationship category is just misleading for people who are looking for actual Moonseeker fic (me, I'm talking about me, this was the worst afternoon of my life). In fic like that, additional ship tags, to my mind, belong in the additional tags category, so you don't end up catfishing innocent enbies like myself who just want to see Reggie fuck his brother's other best friend.

Like listen, I know that besides the extreme popularity of some Jegulus fic the really good ones are thin af on the ground. I know it's tough to find ones that are happy, and treat our boy well. Believe me I know, I am cradling him in my arms and hissing at people to leave us alone.

But the only way to avoid that sort of thing is to refine your tagging and get really, really good at sussing out what you're in for from fic summaries and additional tags. It's a learning curve, but you'll get there.

(As for Jily I am ambivalent. It can be cute, it can be not cute, it can be a handy little tool for angst creation, I don't mind it. I do think that like, some people write Lily really well regardless of her ship, and some people don't; and I don't mean in a 'she's a bad person' way because that's not bad writing, it's a character choice and it's valid. I mean in a 'let's shoehorn this two-dimensional understanding of her into the middle of this relationship to make everyone sad' kind of way. Sometimes she's just poorly written.)

I advise you not to let yourself be tricked into being anti anything, because it's a slippery slope and you never know when something might change your mind; but honestly, if it's stressing you out? Just cultivate your experience my dude. Filter out the 'hurt/no comfort' tag. Keep closing the fics you're not enjoying. Chase your bliss instead of letting the things you don't enjoy catch hooks in you. You'll have a lot more fun, I promise.

(And don't censor words like that bb. We're not bird or clock app; you're not going to get in trouble, you're just going to make it tougher for people's blacklists to pick up on that word and hide the content for the users who need it hidden. Shake yourself from the shackles of asterisks. Say fuck.)

#owl post #old man yells at cloud #QRAB chatter #people will write what they want my dude just keep scrolling you'll find what you like #I understand feeling frustrated but like... take a breath. Reread your favourite. Carry on. #don't let it get you down.

[tapedsleeves]

🦚 - Are there any queer books/shows/etc. that you would suggest?

oh oh oh ok yeah ok ok so.

Books:

- Gideon & Harrow the Ninth. Enemies to lovers to nothing matters if you're not here whatever the fuck that is. GtN & HtN are SO HILARIOUS and SO GOOD and just. So genuinely affecting. Imagine if 3 ten thousand year olds (one of whom is GOD) had a spitehate threesome right in front of you (seventeen) and then you made soup for God and he exploded. - Dreadnought (Nemesis book one) - April Daniels is a trans superhero. I love her, and I hope you will too. - the Darkest Part of the Forest - This was such a lovely twist on the "finding a faerie prince in the forest" plot. - Marriage of Unconvenience. I read this *so long* ago, but basically it's the "have to get married to inherit" marriage of convenience trope. You know what happens. They fall in love. - The Unspoken Name - absolutely LUSH fantasy world(s!!) with so many non-human species, runaways from religious death cults and the sweetest romance between the two... death cult (different ones) refugees. Very delightful. - Perfect on Paper - While there was a lot about this book that i questioned, mostly because the main character was 16 and giving people (solicited) relationship advice based on her non-professional medical (ha) opinion, there was actually a really very lovely bisexual angst plot going on. The MC is in love with her best friend, who's already in a relationship with another girl. She ends up falling for the guy she is helping, and doesn't want to because she feels that being with a guy somehow erases her bisexuality, which as a bi person, in a straight passing relationship... Felt.

Movies:

- The Eagle. Ok look me in the eyes. I know that this is not canonically gay. BUT there is absolutely no way that the climax of this movie makes sense (and also the epilogue) if they're not In Love. don't come at me. - God's Own Country - this movie surprised me SO MUCH. I bought it expecting to be queerbaited. Nope. Not even a little bit. I thought "there's no way this ends happy" and i was wrong about that too. Just. Such a lovely lovely movie. This is definitely in the major rotation for comfort movies. It's not a light movie, but it's just. so fucking hopeful. It's fucking lovely. I don't really watch that much queer cinema, sorry.

Podcasts:

- Horror: The Magnus Archives. the slowest of slow burns, but it's *so central* to the plot and I'm re-listening to it right now and God. The signs show up *so much earlier* than I remember. - Horror: Unwell - Lily and Marisol are *so cute* together. This is just. Really well done all over, I think. - Sci-Fi - The Strange Case of Starship Iris - Violet Liu gets embroiled on a smuggler's ship and a revolutionary plot. Also, Violet's crush in the first episode pans out, but not in the way you expect. Just. This was such a good, short-ish series. - Ars Paradoxica - Time travel shenanigans with an Ace protag. So achy and lovely and good.

I know that there are like, so many more. But I stopped listening to a lot of narrative podcasts or they ended, and I just don't remember them. Or because I switched podcatchers. You know how it is.

Tv:

- Schitt's Creek. Look at me. I know! It's just. It's so fun and easy to watch. It's nice to watch a show where we know that bad things aren't going to happen to characters because the characters are queer, ok? It's just lovely.

Similarly to the movies section, I don't really watch a whole lot of queer tv shows. Not

lgbt+ themed asks

#ask meme #alsdfjkaslkj this was so hard #i have chronic can't remember preferences on command disease #so asking me for my favorite thing completely wipes my brain of anything i've ever liked #but this was super fun!!! #ty yyy

[mikkaeus]

detransition, baby - a review

apparently the “first book written by an openly trans woman to be published by a big 5 publishing house” but that was from a goodreads review so dont quote me on that

disclaimer im am? mostly cis at this point in time

i really enjoyed this book. i loved how unapologetically queer it was. i loved the writing style and overall tone (more on this later*). i cant imagine what the experience must be for the average cis person that has never thought about Gender in their life. 

the one-line summary of the plot is that Ames (detransitioned trans woman) accidentally gets Katrina (his gf) pregnant and proposes that his ex gf Reese (trans woman) to be a coparent because he can’t stand the idea of being shoehorned into the role of a dad and all the gender fuckery that entails by virtue of Katrina’s cishetness. 

the book follows the reese and amy in vignettes from various periods of their lives, as well as the ongoing story in the present with katrina’s pregnancy. the timeline is meandering as it frequently recounts memories from the present, but i didn’t find it hard to follow.

our lovely cast:

- Reese: cynical & confident as a self-described trans elder. she desperately wants a child of her own. she’s emotional and impulsive and has several toxic relationships with men prior to and after her long-term relationship with Amy. her view on womanhood is fucked up, but understandably so. A lot of people on Goodreads, at least half of them TERFs, took issue with this particular section (which is funny, because the author knew exactly what would happen). 

After all, Every woman adores a Fascist. Reese spent a lifetime observing cis women confirm their genders through male violence. 

....

Liberal feminists — especially the trans-hating variety — would have a field day with her. ... But you know what? ... Why should the burden be on her to uphold impeccable feminist politics that barely served her? ... So yeah, Stanley, bring it on. Hit Reese. Show her what it means to be a lady. 

- Amy/Ames: a baby trans when she initially got together with reese, who was as much of a mother to her as she was a partner. she has never been able to break the habit of using maleness as an emotional shield, and one resulting casualty is her sex life — the inability to make herself vulnerable makes sex unsatisfying for both her and Reese. ultimately, their relationship breaks down and in the aftermath, Amy detransitions to Ames. 

- Katrina - late thirties, chinese/jewish, cishet, divorcee. this is her first venturing into queerness. she’s also Ames’ boss, but this dynamic is not explored at all tbh she might as well be his coworker. 

*THE PROSE! As I said earlier, I loved the writing style. It’s easy to read but embellished and ‘literary’ enough to be fun. Not sure of the right word to describe the tone but something like blasé/snappy/honest/blunt? it is also very funny. 

Ames pondered whether he ought to cancel his subscription to HBO in order to afford this sperm bank. He couldn’t fully comprehend the enormous weight of fatherhood and generational lineage, but he could easily comprehend how much he did not want to cancel HBO. 

...she welcomes Reese with a hug that, in its unexpected affection, Reese would put somewhere between suddenly discovered long-lost relative and cult leader thanking you for your impending sacrifice.

is this a Queer Misery book? i don’t think so. all the Bad Things (transphobia, homophobia, dysphoria, and so on) feature insofar that it is a book about the messy lives of these trans women. i didn’t find it depressing. 

are the characters likeable? storygraph says “it’s complicated”. personally, i was emotionally invested in them at around the 50% mark. as someone who has never wanted children or been interested in motherhood at all, and also never been particularly moved by those who were, i was really hoping that things would work out for reese.

the question of race. amy and reese are very white and this is underlined in the book in a sufficiently self-aware (on the part of the author) way. i dont think this detracted from the book. more thoughts on this here. 

sEx? some people have said there was a lot of sex in this book but i personally didn’t really think so (by the standard of fanfic at least). i guess there’s a decent number of talk about sex but not that many sex scenes? 

is co-sleeping with your baby bad? the science says yes! sleeping in the same room is not the same as sleeping in the same bed!! this is the most problematic part of the book 

unfortunately, (MINOR SPOILERS)

I didn’t get the happy ending that I had desperately hoped for (though i probably should’ve clocked something when it ended at 12 weeks post conception). Instead, we got an ambiguous ending that I guess could be seen as hopeful. I’m the type of guy that wants closure in all my stories but alas. 

#queer literature #queer fiction #book review #queer book rec #detransition baby #i did not intend for this to be this long #reading #reading time: 10 hours #read over 5 days