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popmanfan101 · 7 months

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Tumblr needs a hero

#the incredibles #mr incredible #incredible gassy #shitposts #nsft

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bigass-phrog · 6 months

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#shitpost #rule #196 #incredible gassy

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behave-or-get-ban-banned · 11 months

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This page needs a hero,it needs

INCREDIBLE GASSY!

#incredible gassy #shitposts

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buzzforthewin · 3 months

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This blog needs a hero. It needs, INCREDIBLE GASSY!

#incredible gassy #gaserald #soyjak #the sharty #memes

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sneap-sneap · 9 months

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ok trying baking soda and apple cider vinegar bloat holy shit

first off baking soda-mixed it with water, drank it with a straw cause that shit nasty and it can bypass your tongue easier. Just a tiny bit, not even a quarter teaspoon. Drinking it I started feeling bloated, but I wasn’t sure if that was just from drinking a lot of liquid yknow? Or from the acid already in my stomach? But then then apple cider vinegar, just a little, also mixed with water. The effect was literally instant. It was like a stretching sensation, like when you puff your belly out to make it larger, but it’s not you doing something, it’s something doing it to you. It felt really good tbh 👉👈 like I can’t puff out my belly any more 😳 rubbing it feels incredible too 😖 all gurgly and gassy >.<

And I was like “is this healthy and ok” and the answer’s yeah cause baking soda is basically what’s in Tums, and people drink apple cider vinegar just for funsies, and they’re neutralizing each other anyways. OBVIOUSLY don’t do it every day, cause too much baking soda can be bad for you and cause your stomach to over-produce acid but again, ur putting more acid in legit right after ur putting in the base so ur making up for it. Idk which would be better to consume first, maybe ACV first so the reaction is more dramatic and all at once?? Ugh organic chemistry coming in clutch fr 😎😎😎 but it’s better for you and more ..scientifically accurate (?) than like coke and mentos, or banana and sprite, although arguably a briefer experience. idk tbh I haven’t tried the others 🤔🤔🤔🤔 anyways that’s my review 9/10 stars, losing one only bc it was so short (might also be a benefit tho in certain circumstances) ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

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lifewithdavefarts · 6 months

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DaveFarts - Episode 25 “Endurance Test” [Episode List] Tim gets a bit too cocky and challenges his gassy friend by (jokingly) doubting of his farting skills. Dave, whose farts are being as powerful as usual, if not more, gladly accepts the challenge.

This story was originally requested by StraightFartGods.

POV: Tim

The weather outside, despite being warm, wasn’t the best so our plans for the night, being a group of friends who’s starting to surrender way too easily (it’s because once you’re past 25, you get instantly old), we all decided to stay home, our respective homes even, so Dave and I ended up alone. We don’t mind that much.

Dave likes going out way more than me (though it’s not like I don’t know how to have fun) but he too cherishes some good, safe alone-time to recharge social batteries: we’re much more similar than we’d like to admit, which is why we get along so well. They say we’re “the odd couple”, but I think that weirdos simply attract each other naturally, even though they can look very different at first.

“Alright.” Dave said, walking into the living room. He was dressed as if we had to leave, so a grey shirt and a pair of good old dark blue jeans, slightly loose because he untied his belt. “I’m starving.”

“Pizza?” I simply asked.

“The day I’m gonna answer ‘No’ to that is the day you’ll know a skinwalker took my place.”

The power of pizza.

Even though we didn’t actively plan for it, the night slowly morphed into a “movie night”, just the two of us on the couch eating pizza and watching a cheesy, manly, toxic action movie that we can recite by memory because of how many times we watched it: “Bullet Gore”. Now that’s a title!

“Your face is history.” the male hero said, right before turning somebody’s head to bits with his shotgun.

We cheered as and had a sip of beer as if our baseball team scored the match point and enjoyed the unnecessary but fun gore sequences of the film.

“Too bad they ruined everything with the sequel.” Dave commented.

“Aw come on. It’s worse, but not that bad.” I replied.

“Never watched and never will.” he stated, taking a good sip of beer.

By the time the movie was halfway done (it was a surprisingly long flick), I had to turn up the volume because of some noises next to me making me difficult to hear what the characters were saying.

Indeed, Dave started farting, the way he does during nights like these, with pizza and beer acting as fuel for his already incredible talent. He was resting both his legs on the small table in front of the couch, his denim ass facing the TV, so I didn’t have a proper full view of it. I could, however, hear every single blast echoing in the room, with the terrible scent immediately following each thunder.

I would love to say that he was doing this because of my kink, but this is actually what being Dave’s close friend means: you better get used to his farts, because he’s gonna just casually do it in front of you whether you like it or not. He wasn’t even acknowledging that he was ripping one every few minutes, huge ones nonetheless, though once or twice he did snap his fingers to get me to turn to him, so I could see his smirk as he ripped one. Once again, he does this with our other friends as well, but he does seem to put some extra “care” into the teasing part because he knows I actually, well, like it.

But everyone’s got limits: the farts were huge, not overly long, but incredibly stinky. Even for my standards, it was getting a bit… stuffy in there, so I actually went for it.

“I know this is weird coming from me, but… can you tone it down a bit?”

Dave slowly turned to me with a serious, surprised face, and effortlessly replied by ripping a loud, almost wet one, renewing the stench he was immune to. This time it was one of his longer ones, around 7 seconds long.

“Sorry, I can’t hear you.” he managed to say while farting. “Did you say something?”

After the fart ended and a few moments of silence (ignoring the TV), I opened my mouth to speak again, but my friend’s ass spoke first, emitting another loud, long rip.

Dave gestured to his ear and slowly shook his head, as to say the he still couldn’t hear me, as if we were in a loud nightclub, but the only music piercing through my own eardrums was my bro’s loud fart.

That ridiculous scene actually made me laugh like an idiot, while also giving me the hardest boner so far of the night.

9 seconds and the rip was over.

“So, I did it.” Dave said. “You’ve been healed. I blasted your kink out of you.” he joked.

“Please…” I played along. “Those were like… low-tier farts, for your standards.”

“True.” he playfully admitted. “So don’t tempt me.” he threatened.

I hated that I found that… hot.

“I’m n-not… I’m just s-saying that the entire room smells like, I don’t know, rotten beer? Is t-that even possible?”

Dave laughed. “If only there was something or someone who could fix this!”

“What are you implying…?” I asked.

“Well…” Dave sat normally on the couch. “I assumed your lungs were better than this. But apparently you just can’t handle my power.” he said, with a cheesy smirk.

“Oh…” I got what he meant. “Well, maybe I’m not complaining because of you’re farting too much.” I leaned closer to him, as if we were doing some shady business. “Maybe I’m complaining because you’re not farting enough.” I dared to say.

My friend replied with a surprised laughter. “Are you seriously challenging me?” he didn’t sound offended or disgusted, just amused. But he can get cocky.

“Wanna bet?” I asked, indeed challenging him.

“Alright, get up.”

Dave stood up and I did the same: it truly looked like we were doing a business meeting.

“Challenge accepted.” he continued, and we firmly shook hands. “If I win, beers are on you for 3 months.”

“Deal.” I replied. “But if I win, we’re gonna watch ‘Bullet Gore 2’ later.”

While still shaking hands, Dave looked at me funny.

“Really? That’s it?” he replied, with a smile. “All of this just to watch a shitty movie with me?”

Funny how that’s the thing he found weird instead of, you know, the boner his farts give me.

“Yeah. Pretty gay, huh?” I joked.

“Okay…” he nodded, still somewhat surprised. “It’s a deal.”

We once again had this super manly handshake going on, just as an helicopter in the movie exploded in a fiery fireball, killing a bunch of henchmen and one of the main villains, with the shirtless muscular hero saying something like “Burn in Hell, you son of a bitch!”. Probably the manliest moment I ever lived through.

“So, let’s hear those toots.” I said, bravely.”

“Toots?” my friend replied. “I’m gonna blast your face so hard you’re gonna regret having this kink…”.

Dave casually threatening me like this… got me instantly hard. I knew he was just playing along but goddammit, why am I like this? Why is he like this? Why the fuck did I even accept this bet?! As my own mind made fun of me, my bro lied on this stomach on the couch, his tall figure occupying all of it, his nice jeans-clad ass facing up, looking like a soft warm denim pillow.

I simply managed to sit between his long legs and planted my face into that ass, still stinky for all the farts he ripped until that moment. My nose wasn’t facing down however, as I didn’t want to make it weird.

“Dude.” I heard Dave say. “Honestly, your lack of commitment to your fart kink disappoints me”. he then laughed, reaching for my head. “Be a man and face my ass.” he said, pushing my head deeper between his denim asscheeks.

I tried not to laugh myself at that weird statement, so I just obeyed and turned my head, facing down, now fully at the mercy of my friend’s powerful butt. I took a good whiff, enjoying the smell of almost 1 hour of loud, post-pizza blasts. As I did that, I felt the ass’ muscles relaxing, a sign that Dave was pushing one out, and indeed it came out immediately: an ear-piercing blast and made my face shake, almost wet-sounding, felt like a slap on my face.

My task was clear: not a single particle of gas had to reach Dave’s nose, so I inhaled it deeply and loudly as the fart kept erupting straight down my nostrils. I inhaled so hard and for so long that I actually surprisingly outlasted my friend’s 9 seconds: now the only noise we both could hear (besides someone getting shot in the movie) was me breathing his gas in… which made me realize how weird that was.

Am I making this weird? Too… “porn-y” for my straight friend? I love that he has no problems with me and my kink, but I don’t want to cross certain lines you know. He’s not saying anything… but his silence only makes it worse. I had to make sure.

“Dave.” I said, my voice being muffled by his ass, which made him laugh. “Am I making this weird?”

My friend simply turned his head, trying to look at me. I managed to get a quick look of his facial expression but the only thing on his face was a cocky smirk.

“Not weirder than usual to me.” he simply said. He then reached for my head, making it bounce a bit in his ass. “…Ready?”

Another fart erupted, which itself was Dave’s real answer to my question: “it’s fine”, he knows what this kink is by now, and he’s the one who basically challenged me to sniff it all up. Plus, if he was weirded out he knew he could just tell me and I wouldn’t be offended: we’re all adults here after all.

So there I was, my nose enduring some of the worst rips my friend ever gifted to me, the sheer power of those blasts being raunchier than his usual for some reason, maybe because of the beers being warmer or the mozzarella on the pizza being spoiled. No idea.

Or maybe it was just Dave putting extra efforts into his farts, if that was even possible. He’s the Fart King after all, so if he was somehow able to set custom pitch, loudness and power for each farts he ripped I wouldn’t have been surprised. Then again, he could even fart on command, so maybe he doesn’t need more buffs than he already has.

“Your face is history” my friend said, in a deeper voice, a clear reference to the masterpiece we were watching earlier.

And just like the henchman from the movie, my head was blown away by a sheer deadly force, this time in the form of Dave’s being unhinged, each natural blast somehow bigger and better than the previous one. I feel like that it doesn’t matter how this bet goes: I’m winning by simply having a bro like him.

I kept sniffing it all up as the blast rushed down my throat. He was good at farting, but I was also good at taking it. It’s like I said: weirdos work better together!

Yeah, I was taking it all like a champ.

“I could do this all night you know.” he boasted, during a rare moment of his ass being silent.

“What a coincidence: me too!” I bragged.

“Ohhhh… someone’s getting cocky back there.”

Dave really wanted those free beers, huh? He once again reached for my head and, with a firm grip, pushed it deeper down his warm denim ass, now almost sagging.

“Let’s see if you can keep your promise, shall we?” that was a threat.

There was like 10 seconds of silence, 10 never-ending seconds, but I just knew Dave was brewing something big, as he kept my head there (not that I was planning to move it anyway). Finally, he turned to me, with a cheesy grin, purposely trying to look like some kind of serial killer from a slasher movie before finish his victim off.

And then he hit me with his weapon of choice: the loudest fart I heard that night. It was big, it was powerful, it was deep, long. His hand didn’t move and my whole face was shaking because of the sheer power of the blast; I had to close my eyes ‘cause the gas was making them burn. How was it possible to fart so naturally and casually like this for him will always be beyond me… but I didn’t care. I managed to breathe that monster in with my mouth open, almost choking on my friend’s deadly gas.

Dave loved the challenge, but two can play this game! I could tell he was amused, disgusted and surprised by how good I was at enduring his powerful rips.

And finally, after 16 whole seconds, that impressive display of flatulence was over, not a single particle of gas reaching my farter-friend’s nostrils, as I promised.

“I believe you’re losing your touch.” I mocked him.

“With all the farts you've been eating, of course you'd be talking shit you ungrateful bastard!”

“Ohhhh sorry, someone's a little touchy.” I kept teasing him.

“Alright, I’m done holding back.” he sounded comically annoyed by my impressive endurance.

My friend slowly turned over until he was lying on his back, making sure he didn’t accidentally kick me with his long legs. He now assumed a more familiar position, the one he usually has when blasting me. He cocked his legs up, showing off his denim ass and a tiny bit of his red boxer brief, and wrapped his legs around me, pulling me closer to his gas source. His long legs had an even stronger grip than his hand, and my whole face was now completely planted into my friend’s ass.

“I’m feeling merciful tonight, so I’m giving you the chance to surrender now.” he stated, as his legs held me still, keeping my nose right between the rough fabric of his jeans-clad buttcheeks.

“Never.” I boasted. “…unless, you know, you actually want to stop because this is getting too weir-“

“Shut up!” he cut me off. “You just had to ruin my villainous speech, didn’t you?!” he laughed.

I just didn’t know what to say.

“Again, this is your last chance bro.”

I played along, knowing he was okay with it. “Hit me with your best shot, but don’t wound what you can’t kill.”

We both laughed like immature idiots, but Dave took my words at heart, because once we were done laughing at that ridiculous moment, he felt air being sucked inside his anus.

Yes, he switched to “on-command” mode, his secret weapon, his final secret move. Despite my face being there, my bro didn’t have any trouble at sucking more and more air through his ass like a vacuum cleaner, and the sound that made wasn’t that different from an actual fart. Every time I heard that “air-being-sucked-in” noise, as silly as that sounds, I think of a drumroll, the kind of tension that raises before the beat actually drops, because that’s what Dave’s farts are: something to look forward to… if you’re into it of course.

He’s been sucking air for like 20 seconds now and I started to regret my cockiness: when even a kinky bitch like me ends up being afraid of his own best bro’s farting skills, you just know something big, maybe too big, is gonna happen.

The anticipation made me hornier than ever, and the fact that it was, well, Dave, just Dave, my friend, made it even hotter for me. So casually, undeniably hot.

Finally, he stopped sucked air in, and I could hear Dave breathing (from his mouth) heavily, a sign that he was getting tired… and even his ass was getting sweatier and warmer.

“Your face is history.” my bud said again, in a comically deep voice.

We love that movie.

What followed, however, almost made me pass out.

The loudness was almost unnatural, I feared it could make me deaf. Imagine the stock sound of a fart, only longer, more powerful, airy, the most impressive fart Dave ripped in months, something so powerful that he can even feel the recoil as he pushed it out… just like a shotgun.

The more he farted, the louder it got, and I swore he was gonna tear a hole through his jeans this time, there was no way his clothes were able to endure that. I kept sniffing, breathing heavily, the fart’s pace being faster than my own breathing, if that makes any sense. 10 seconds already and the blast didn’t seem to lose any power: I almost got scared.

As the fart kept getting ripped, I felt Dave stretching his long denim legs wide to ease the fart out, which in turn made it sound even louder and deadlier. I felt like living a weird fever dream, probably because of all the poisonous gas in my lungs. But I also felt the luckiest man in the world.

I dared to peek over that denim ass, only to be greeted by Dave having the most evil smirk in the world, completely unfazed by how weird I was, how all of that was… but I could also see how tired and sweaty he was from forcing all those farts out, incredibly enough.

I planted my head back where it belonged, sniffing as much as I could, as if my life depended on it, even though I was almost passing out for all that stench… and the blood rushing down to my boner didn’t help to focus at all.

And yet… I won. The fart was losing power, ending with a quick series of toots, Dave’s legs crashing down the couch, his left one on my right side, his right one on my left side, and I got up myself, my face leaving that gas trap, finally sitting down normally on the couch.

I took a good look at Dave: he was indeed tired, sweaty, sporting a silly smirk.

“Is that how you look like after sex?” I dared to joke.

My friend laughed. “Hey, I love you bro, but you gotta settle for my farts.”

I patted one of his legs in response, as a cheesy way to thank him, and hopefully he knew how thankful I was. I mean, he already knew how aroused I was anyway, so why keep the fact that I’m grateful a secret?

Dave too adjusted his position, this time kicking me on purpose while doing it, and sat back normally.

“I gotta say, I didn’t except you to win.” he admitted.

“…win?!” I replied. “Bro… I was basically done. That last one almost killed me.”

We both laughed at the absurdity of the situation.

“Let’s call it a tie then.” he proposed. “Until next time at least.” he just casually said.

I simply turned to the TV, only to find out that the movie was over.

Did Dave just face-farted me for like… 30 minutes?! Time truly flew by.

My friend then reached for his beer and the remote. We some on-demand features on our TV and, after navigating the UI for a few seconds, he started downloading “Bullet Gore 2”.

“Really?” I asked.

“Well, if you can endure all of that gas, I can sit through a turd of a movie.”

I think he was gonna watch this movie with me either way, regardless of any bet, just like I’m more than happy to offer him a beer whenever I could, so all of this fart-bet was for nothing.

Then again, weirdos attract each other naturally...

End of Episode 25

#eproctophilia #davefarts #fart kink #fart story #malefarts

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sickstummys · 2 months

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Ok imagine a bunch of high school guys going on a roadtrip for a match. Then a norovirus bug spread around and got caught by the "weaker" guys who starts to get gassy and sick, throwing up and fighting for the bathroom at the back of the bus etc. The coach herded the sick boys to the back to get closer to the bathroom and the others who arent sick starts to be mean and make fun of them.

Enter A, who's pretty well adjusted to the team, but he wants to be accepted and doesn't want to be made fun of. The problem is that he's catching it, bad. Two hours into it and he's sweating with chills, cradling his stomach and swallowing rapidly, leaning against the front seat wishing he's not sick. His stomach is stirring and burning and he's trying so hard not to pass gas and alert the other boys so his stomach is getting uncomfortably bloated as he holds everything in.

He stays like that for hours, swallowing puke and clenching ass for dear life while it burns and churns and he's desperately massaging his lower belly and letting out small belches, desperate to relieve himself. He's sweat drenched and hunched up and isn't sure how long he could hold everything in.

The kind coach finally notices this and gently approaches him, careful not to alert the other boys. He quietly offers A to move to the back and lay there even if he's too embarrased to relieve himself. A moved to the back and starts getting more comfortable with letting out small farts and burps into a plastic bag.

When they get to the hotel the coach ushers the sick kids into one close hotel rooms and A is finally placed into a waiting toilet. He's a bit constipated at first because he's been holding it all on for hours, and his stomach is incredibly bloated with all the gas and diarrhea, but the coach assures him it's better to let it out or he'll get sicker and starts to help stimulate the side if his belly to at least get some gas to come out.

A couldn't help but let out long, wet burps at first, and then finally heaves his contents out. The pressure from gagging and vomiting finally lets the dam burst out from the back and he starts blowing out of both ends, bursts of flatulence and diarrhea cascading and splattering against the toilet while he's helplessly writhing and groaning in pain and relief, could do nothing but let his body empty himself.

#emeto #sc@t #sickfic #bellykink #diarrhea #diarrhea kink

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princessfarts31 · 5 days

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in case anyone cares I’m incredibly gassy tonight and these are some loud and bassy farts in pushing out. Usually mine are sbds but tonight they’re loud and long. whos gonna come sniff them for me 🤭

#gassy #eproctophilia #fart kink #gassy farts #gassy feedee #girl farts #eprocto #fatty #feed me #gassy belly

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oni-the-eevee · 27 days

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Going back to my fantasy ideas: I’ve covered centaurs. I’ve even mentioned minotaurs. But there’s one gassy fantasy race that it’d be a crime to leave out: the goat-mans. (“Mans”, not “men,” because it’s short for "humans.”)

Call ‘em fauns, or even satyrs, but none of them mind if you use the most descriptive and animal-based term for them. Goat-mans are a bit unique in that regard: a majority of centaurs and minotaurs bristle if you’re quick to call them horses or cows/bulls. Goat-mans, or at least a good deal of them, readily embrace the goat identity, cheerfully calling themselves goats to any non-taur around. (As always, this varies from person to person, and you should always stop calling a goat-man a goat if they ask you to.)

As you’d expect, goat-mans are as flatulent as their animal counterparts, and they have NO qualms about relieving that gas whenever they need to. Goat-man parties are not for the faint of heart; joining a mosh pit with them means they’re guaranteed to belch in your ears and fart while they grind against you. And don’t expect them to hold back at meals either. A goat-man will happily fart while chewing their food, making more room in their guts before they swallow. And any drinking competitions with them (which they have option) are followed by belching contests.

Because of all this (as well as their incredible horniness), goat-mans have earned a reputation for being crass, and are sometimes left out of certain events, relationships, and even social spheres. This is, of course, entirely unfair, and a goat-man will hold back their gas and put on a mask of manners if absolutely necessary. They love pleasure and relief, but they’re not unreasonable. However, you can only be truly close to a goat-man if you’re willing to be around them outside of that stuffy social function, when they can wrap their arms around you and hold you close as they lift a furry leg and fart out their troubles.

#eprocto #eproctophilia #fart kink #farting #eructo #oni thoughts

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gatzilksis-2 · 6 months

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The Grand Return (3)

(this story includes fart kink and other adult elements)

chapter two here

Chapter Three: Cropdusters

Opening with Tony as the manager was pretty normal at first. I was lucky enough to work with both Vince and Tony, the man I'd befriended and the man whose infamous gas I had experienced only once. I learned that they had known each other a while. Vince had been a sophomore while Tony was a senior in high school. I hadn't grown up in this town, so I didn't know anyone here that well.

Things began to get going on our first smoke break. Vince didn't smoke but vaped, so he went out into the cold with Tony and I. We were all shivering, clouds forming from our breaths.

Tony took his long hair down and started fixing it, cigarette between his lips. When his hair was back up, he bent both knees with his mischievous brown eyes staring at me. PHWRRRT!

Vince chuckled, his glasses fogging up. "Damn. I'm surprised you couldn't see that in the air."

"Wasn't warm enough," Tony joked. The smell of his fart took over the area, though there was a breeze. It was like hot eggs in a dumpster in the summer, a fart to be proud of.

"Wow." I rubbed my nose. "Pam said you fart a lot."

"Who, me?" His grin spread wider, and he put his cigarette out. "Not at all."

"That's crazy talk," joked Vince.

We went back inside, and business started picking up. Even so, this was the day I learned both of my gassy coworkers were married to women. Of course they were.

Two mornings later, Vince and I got there first, Tony showing up late in his SUV. He was pulling his hair up as he hurried to the door. He unlocked it and held it open, his shirt only half-buttoned, showing his hairy chest though the weather was freezing. I held the second door for him, but Tony shook his head. "You go. Trust me."

I had a feeling I knew what he was up to. I walked ahead, following Vince to the front counter of The Chicken Spot. I looked back and noticed an excuse; the rug was out of place. I backtracked to fix it, bending down just as Tony was walking by.

My nostrils filled with his rank, silent fart, probably multiple of them pushed out as he'd walked. I stood up straight, eyes wide from my instant love of his incredible gas. At the counter, Tony noticed and smirked. "That's why I told you to go first."

"My god." I shook my head, pretending not to like it as I joined him. "They always smell that bad?"

"Yeah. I'm extremely lactose intolerant, and I don't do well with bread, either." Tony put a tan hand to his average stomach and walked away, leaving me excited for the future of his farts.

Later that morning, he brought up the subject on his own. It had been slow, and we were just chilling.

"Pam really said I fart a lot?" Tony asked, his sexy smile excitable and shining white.

"Yeah," I answered and laughed. "Did you always?"

"Oh, yeah." Tony nodded as Vince walked over to us. "Since I was a kid. I didn't know I had the digestive issues until I was an adult. I was the smelly kid. But I learned how to make them quiet so it wasn't as distracting. Now I use that skill to cropdust everyone here."

He couldn't have been prouder of himself.

Vince pushed his glasses up, chuckling. "Dude, we have to start the cropdust battles again!"

I loved the sound of that. "The what?"

"When we closed together, we'd both cropdust people until someone noticed," Tony explained. "We could totally do it on this shift, from ten to two when everyone is here."

"That's hilarious." I definitely wanted to be part of this.

So later, when there were employees everywhere, Tony and Vince were at their stations. Vince was bagging for drive thru, right beside my order-taking screen. Tony was way down the line on the fry station.

Vince's spot was in front of the drive thru sandwich station, and behind Tony's spot was the front counter and the front sandwich station. I watched both of them, wondering how much they were farting.

It wasn't long before I could smell the shitty, meaty smell of Vince's farts. When there was a break in business, I said, "Hey, I can smell you."

"Doesn't count. You know the game." Vince looked down at Tony. Tony smiled and made a cutting motion with two fingers: cutting farts.

My lunch break came soon, and someone came to relieve me. I patted Vince's back as I passed him, graciously taking a nice breath of his gas. The girl replacing me would surely smell it, and he would lose the game.

However, as I was passing the front sandwich station, the girl in that position said, "I think the oil needs changed or something. It stinks over here."

Tony and I locked eyes and started laughing. I clapped a hand over my mouth and ran into the lobby, and Tony retreated to the back to crack up.

When I got back to my position, I told Vince the news, pointing to the sandwich girl. "She smelled Tony, so you win."

"No, that means I lost," Vince explained. "The point of the game is to get someone to smell it."

"Well, damn. I mean, Tony seems like he could outfart most guys."

"Catch me on the right day." Vince took off his glasses and cleaned them with his shirt, showing a couple inches of tan skin covered by dark hair. He put the glasses back on, the sliver of belly disappearing. "Ask my wife."

"I believe you."

The next morning, Vince didn't work but a lady instead. Tony still opened, but he didn't act the same way with an older woman present.

The day after that, I had Tony and another guy, an older one. When we were set up and open but dead, Tony and I leaned on the front counter. BWRRRT! He farted right against the surface.

The older guy jumped and smiled. "Dang, buddy!"

Tony and I laughed, and I slid an inch away from him. His scent, always the same intensity and thickness, invaded my nostrils.

"I tell ya, I couldn't stop farting last night," Tony started, crossing his arms. "One after the other after the other. Kate went to sleep on the couch after a couple hours of it."

"What'd you eat?" I asked.

"I had a spicy sandwich from here and then alfredo pasta later." Tony rubbed his stomach above the shirt. "Lactose intolerance, and spicy chicken always gets me, too."

"Your wife isn't used to it by now?" I asked, figuring she should be, since they had a seven year old son together.

"She has her limits." Tony held his breath. There was no sound, but the smell doubled. I swear the air turned a degree warmer. "It was always hard to find girls that liked me. One date I went on, I couldn't stop farting all through the movie. I knew it stunk, but she didn't seem to notice. But then I never heard from her again."

"That's awesome." I laughed.

"Jesus!" The second wave of stink hit our older coworker, and he walked away to the back.

"I'm glad you talk about farts like I do." Tony patted me on the back. "You and Vince are my gas buddies."

Gas buddies. I liked the sound of that.

Next time...

Vince and Cal connect on a deeper level while Tony gets brutal.

#farts #gatzilksis #eproctophilia #fart kink #eprocto #flatulence #fart fiction #fart stories #male fart fiction #male fart stories

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ruelpsen · 3 months

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Are you still looking for horny asks? I got one

One of my favourite things about this kink is m*sturbation while burping. Someone j*rking off and suddenly letting out a belch, Someone incredibly drunk and gassy deciding to rub one out, or (my absolute favourite) someone burping on purpose while they touch themselves because it turns them on. I've had this one fantasy where a guy is going down on his boyfriend while touching himself, but the swallowing makes him gassy, and he gets so turned on by burping that it makes him org*sm then and there. Honestly, it's even hotter if someone's there with them to either help coax out the burps or to watch them become more and more weak and horny

(Censored certain words because I don't want Tumblr to flag you)

Yes please I am ALWAYS down to get horny asks!

I love burps + getting off together so much and honestly it's something I need to do more with. I mean that both in the sense of writing and in, shall we say, my own practice. I really enjoy doing it but don't have enough privacy for it 99% of the time these days. :/

The fantasies you mention are seriously hot too! I think it's adorably sexy when someone can't help but cum from their own belching while getting someone else off. Watching someone else get hopelessly turned on by their burps is so fun- which paired with some of the other ideas you brought up can't help but make me think about how hot it would be to include burping in a mutual masturbation session. Fuck do I really want to try that sometime!

#this was hot so thank you #and thanks as well for the censoring #i don't always know what exactly this site looks at for flagging tbh #ask #answered #anon #burping #not sfw

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