#item: unsolicited dick pic

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

hi. alot is happening. bumming off wifi rn. i'm copy/pasting someone from a doc i started in libra office with no internet.

A LOT IS HAPPENING BEHIND THE SCENES AND I’M KEEPING TRACK.

The landlady has made excuses to not give us back the security deposit. She keeps having Dave’s boss call him in a foul mood will all kind of threats and accusations of things we supposedly broke/ruined.

1.) On our first night out of there she has already threatened to call the cops on us by claiming that we filled the house with perfume before we left so it’ll hurt her. What happened was we cleaned it because she demanded that it was clean like it supposedly was when we moved in(it wasn’t clean when we moved in). We used that Meyers shit, which has a pretty muted scent and is supposed to be safe for the environment. And it was just basic sweeping, dusting, and then doing up the ktichen and bathroom just to be safe.

2.) Today she has claimed that we filled the washing machine with motor oil to ruin it as punishment before we left. She swears the whole house smells of oil, after screaming about it smelling like too much perfume that was supposedly used to hurt her breathing. Mind you, mom is an asthmatic so we can’t use things with strong scents because it will fuck her up. If we bought oil, it would be for the van cuz that shit is expensive and we wouldn’t be wasting it on HER of all people.

By now, Dave’s boss is aware that she cannot legally withold the deposit and that she’s trying to use the fact that Dave is a dumbass, against him. Mom however, knows the laws, and the lease said nothing about not using scented cleaners OR perfumes, and she does not have a legit reason to not give us the $1600 back. If she took it to court it would not hold. She has to make an itemized list of her claims, Dave has to acknowledge whether or not they are true, and then it goes to court.

fyi I took videos of everything in the house. Bethy’s Room, Mom’s Room, Bathroom, Living Room, Dining Room, Kitchen. All items that were hers, such as the Oven, Fridge, Washer, Dryer, Toilet, Sinks,Tub/Shower, random Recycle Bin, and Wall Hangings. Inside and Out. All details were recorded before we left. I even recorded us leaving at exactly 11:23 PM Feb 15th 2024, and recorded turning the light off.

Let’s see if she comes up with something else tomorrow. ~5:22 PM Feb, 17th 2024

3.)

Feb, 21st 2024:

I’ve just been informed by Bethy that Dave has gone on to further embarrass us. He insists that he’s got all these racing friends(and tbf they promised to help fund a big event to raise money for us 2 years ago, and then ghosted him AND Bethy when they asked what they had to do to help) who will help and has been harassing them for money.

One of them, an active dirt racer, posted a screenshot with Dave’s full name in a text convo begging for cash. And then half a dozen other dirt racers, active and retired, shared that he’s been hitting them up for money too. How he was in people’s posts about random shit beggn for money and then how he got swindled under his own comment by someone mocking him and posting the same thing he did with a small wording change about leaving an abusive house and Dave not only fell for it but then said he’d try to help them.

And now the greater dirt racing community is aware of this and are mocking him and us and some are making inquiries about Bethy’s well-being in connection to Dave. And their wives are having things to say about how he’s a bad parent and she should be taken away from him.

And I need to remind everyone that this is to pay off a blackmailer who is demanding $300 a week now. Bethy got a bit more info out of him on that and it apparently involves a photo. And there are only 2 types of photos that can get him in legal trouble(since he believes he CAN go to jail over this). So either he sent an unsolicited dick pic, which won’t receive much punishment cuz he’s a man who LOOKS white enough. OR it’s child p0rn, and he’s never given that vibe out of everything fucked up with him so I’m not exactly sure.

But he walks around demanding to know ‘did anyone give us money yet’ and people have donated to the GFM and Mealtrain, and I’ve earned about $100 on Ko-Fi recently, and we haven’t told him cuz he won’t use it for anything good.

He’s been bumming extra money off his boss despite knowing that the van need fixing, we need hot water and heat, and several other problems that need fixing ASAP. And his boss is asking questions and is getting nastier and nastier cuz he doesn’t trust Dave’s intentions and shitty lying.

There is no lease. The owner of this house knows Dave's boss and they supposedly came to an agreement that so long as Dave fixes up this house, we can stay here in the mean time for free. They supposedly made an agreement that Dave's boss will buy everything we need to fix the house up and then send all the receipts to the friend who will then pay him back.

And now Dave's boss is getting so fed up with Dave and his wishy-washy behavior and begging for all this money all the time that he does not earn, that he is now saying he never made any such promises. And he refuses to contact the owner of this house at all. There is no recording. No contract. No signatures. No proof that such a discussion went down at all. It is Dave’s word(unreliable) against the boss’(the one with money and power here) word.

Dave has no way to contact the owner either. Cuz he didn’t think that was necessary apparently. He was perfectly fine making his boss the go-between until his boss got angry.

So our ability to even stay here is hanging in the balance.

Can’t wait to see what other bad news I’m gonna find out.

#poverty

[chrismillisvisartopenstudio]

Love Letters

After finalising the design and using saliva to hold the envelopes together, I decided on using the wax on the back of the envelope. I want the wax to be a relic of a bygone age, a purely aesthetic design which is hard to come by in the minimalist contemporary era we exist in. Each one was made individually as I hand heated the wax in the microwave, hand stamped and waited to cool. Ideas of mass production and the handmade come into mind. Does these items loose their value because of their lack of scarcity? Does this counteract with the time taken to produce each one? Or is it the content that matters? Is the content sweet like the letters scent or visceral? does the gibberish comprising my body mean something or nothing? This image has parallels to the infamous unsolicited dick pic, both with little to no context or statements following. The main difference between mine is that my letters will be consensual, something to purchase or take.

[wonderpommey]

For someone like Roman “everyone wants to fuck me” Roy who couldn’t handle being confronted to someone’s genuine desire for him in previous seasons (the trainer relationship is transactional, Grace excites him when she wants someone else, he hates when Tabitha gets aroused). 

I think we kind missed that not being attacked by Gerri’s desire seems to create a safe space for him to develop a more reciprocal attitude. Is it because he thinks she won’t want him back or because it creates space for him to start craving reciprocity? That question is still up in the air. But certainly, this season moves away from the S2 pretend abuse from Gerri and has been a festival of words of affirmation from her “Great instincts, we have something going, visionary, well done”, as many self-esteem boosts that really don’t seem to turn him off. 

Propositioning her is a big escalation from their S2 stuff which didn’t involve her desire at all (the only evolution was around her consent), and unlike with Tabitha/Grace, sex isn’t something she asks for, so there’s no reason to offer.

His idea to “sleep with Laurie” is him going “alright I can see that you want that, maybe we can include him in our thing...” as long as I’m not getting left out.

The items initially are also about giving her something he thinks she wants and is being minxy about because Gerri historically is “this is unacceptable/get in that bathroom”. I think the dick pics were so interesting this season because they’re so much more than just unsolicited x rated items. Roman keeps facing pushback from Gerri sexually & emotionally and in the end he figures out a neat little way to make sure she cares about him; Putting his dick in her scissor hands, just like he did when he was considering teaming up with Kendall, giving her blackmail material, giving her prejudicial information. Forcing her to show him how she feels through protecting him or destroying him.

It’s awkward and misguided but there a definite move towards opening himself up to what Gerri wants and finding out how she feels about him. For Roman, that’s interesting because it’s so unusual. He’s never concerned himself with what his partners actually wanted. There’s also a move towards wanting care/affection from her “you love the boot because you love being kicked by it”, seems he’s starting to explore how untrue that can actually be with both Gerri and his dad. ETA - Someone also raised a good point to me and that’s how Roman has also revealed more and more of the sides of himself he may - rightly or wrongly - be ashamed of; “fuck Laurie” and the tattoo brothers thing. There’s a desperation to reach intimacy made even funnier by his dismissal of Shiv in episode 7 “Yeah I love people getting to know me”.

#meta #roman roy #gerri kellman #gerrixroman #succession hbo #still normal about Roman #they just need to touch already #i'll keep writing essays about it until they do #you've been warned

[oh-you--pretty-things]

A few thoughts from e08, this is not going to be coherent so bear with me! It's also going to be Roman and Gerri based because they've got me in a vice grip!

This is too long but who cares....

The way they defended each other to both Logan and Shiv though, there has to be are real feelings there for both of them, right!?.

I found the Logan and Shiv chat about the whole dickgate a little strange, he seemed quite dismissive of Shiv, I think because he can see she's trying to throw Roman overboard ( 😉) and he didn't seem to like it, he got quite flustered and basically told her to do one.

Now I think we can say that Roman has, in his dad's eyes, done well this season and I think that might play a huge part in Logan's decision going forward. The conversation between Logan and Roman brought that home, he seemed a little concerned!? about him but I also felt overall he was angry because he's implicated, Gerri. That might sound weird because he wasn't particularly complimentary to Gerri but Logan is never complimentary about anyone really and although I'm still thinking about that comment to Shiv about Gerri being her protective suit I think that was more to keep Shiv in line because I think Logan has the same opinion of Shiv as Rhea has and he doesn't think she's up to it but feels he needs to keep her close by in the company. With all that in mind, I do think Gerri is the only person that Logan trusts and he knew that the only person that could possibly take over was Gerri. I think Logan and Gerri do have quite a deep relationship that I hope is maybe explored in the finale, I also feel like there is quite a strong bond between Marcia and Gerri and also Caroline, I mean Gerri has brought a date and she is included in the bachelorette party?!

Now there is a lot more to cover here but I think we need to talk about the items. Now it's obvious that he's sent multiple dick pics but Gerri is only now asking for them to stop. She does seem a little nervous during that conversation (until she starts to analyse and show some concern for Roman) and I think she's maybe realising how deep this is relationship is getting for Roman and she's not entirely sure how comfortable she is with the relationship. We know she is someone who is careful and avoids mess and knows that any form or personal relationship with Roman will be messy.

Now unsolicited dick pics are not cool and especially after Gerri had just told him to stop, but this is Roman we are talking about (he's currently giddy about her praising him) and he knows that if he sends an item to Gerri after she's told him to stop she's more than likely going to scold him and that's exactly what he wants.

One last thing that I found quite telling was the fact Roman basically disregarded the praise from his Dad, I mean he unsuccessfully swiped it away and just wanted to revel in Gerri's praise and then go to dinner with her... 😭

This doesn't make sense but I am broken...help!

#succession #romangerri #gerri kellman #roman roy #gerri x roman #gerriroman #gerri/roman #roman x gerri #what has my life come to #i need to sort myself out #i just 😭😭😭😭 #this show is ruining my life #succession thoughts #succession hbo

[callmebert]

Mmmm hi! :) questions for you:

1.) Time to toot your own horn! What would you say you’re best at during sex/foreplay?

2.) Any sex bucket list items?

3.) How’s your sexting skills?

4.) Ever send an unsolicited dick pic? (Even if you thought it was solicited?) :/

5.) Top 3 turn ons and offs!

🥰❤️😋☺️

Anon I see? It’s ok to be shy. I am too lol.

1) pleasing her

2) not sure what this means

3) my sexting game is fire. I get really poetic. It’s beautiful.

4) I’ve never sent an unsolicited dick pic. That’s psychopath behavior and disgraceful. 

5) turn ons- that look in her eyes, boobs, legs turn offs- I’m really not sure to be honest.

#above anything #i love my girlfriend

[seokoloqy]

Click, Click | jjk (m)

➳ PAIRING: jungkook x y/n

➳ GENRE: smut, pwp, college!au, f2l

➳ WORD COUNT: 2k

➳ WARNINGS: blowjob, virgin!jk, the sharing of unsolicited dick pics lmao

➳ SUMMARY: who knew someone else’s dick pic would get Jungkook his first blowjob?

➳ REQUEST: 7 (You’re n-not ,um, w-wearing anything under that, are you..?) + 38 (You want me to give you your book/phone/item back? Make me.) with kook please!!

➳ A/N: wrote this in one sitting listening to the same 4 daniel caesar songs on repeat... anyway jk is a shy dorky mess in this and I love him!

—

The incessant sound of your phone keyboard as you text makes it impossible for Jungkook to focus on his notes. It’s bad enough he doesn’t want to be studying in the first place. The way you snap your gum, tap your foot, and rapidly type is the worst kind of distraction, and his little crush on you only makes it harder to ignore.

“Can you… can you stop?”

You pause with your thumb over the send button, raising one eyebrow as he timidly taps his finger on his textbook. “Stop what?”

“You know, um, texting w-with the sound on. Maybe put your phone on silent,” he awkwardly chuckles, trying to soften his request, hoping you won’t be offended by something so small as silencing your phone. It wasn’t like you had to be there anyway. You were the one helping him study English. If you wanted to leave right now, you totally could. No one is going to stop you, especially not Jungkook, not when he’s so shy towards you.

“Oh, sure,” you say, flicking the mute switch down. “If something bothers you, don’t be afraid to do something about it next time, ‘kay?”

“Y-Yeah, okay,” he smiles, feeling the apples of his cheek turn pink and averting his eyes back down to the page. He tries to focus once again on the words in front of him, but your nails click on the screen once again and it’s nonstop.

Does he say something again? No, he shouldn’t. He just bothered you once about it, but then again, it’s really annoying.

“H-Hey,” he says again.

“Hmm,” you hum, not even looking up from the screen.

“Can-” He pauses. What is he going to ask? Can you cut your nails because the sound of them typing on your screen bugs him? No way he’s going to say that. You’re going to think he’s annoying. No, no, no he can’t say that. “Heh, never mind. It’s nothing.”

—

The next time Jungkook sees you, it’s at your house around ten o’clock at night. When he got the text asking if you wanted to study together for a test tomorrow he couldn’t say no even if it was pretty late. He just wanted to see you, although he’d rather not be studying.

You’re both sitting on the bed facing one another crisscrossed legs and notebooks resting on your laps.

“You’re pretty good at English already, Jungkook,” you say exasperatedly, throwing down your pencil. “I don’t know why you need me.”

He blushes, looking down bashfully at his paper, “I’m only good because you’re a good teacher.”

He can barely look you in the eyes, afraid he’d be lost in a trance by your beauty. He’s had a crush on you ever since he met you in the library one late night and you hit it off talking about the shitty tasting coffee you were both drinking to stay awake. He fondly remembers the way you had to muffle your laughter behind two hands when he accidentally tipped over his cup all over his biology notes and frantically scrambled to dab away the mess.

He loved your laughter, even more, when you weren’t trying to conceal it. It was loud, unattractive, you think a little annoying, but he thinks it’s music. A noise he’d like to replay over and over. Maybe if he got a chance to take you out on a date… he’d make you laugh as much as he could.

“Y/n, c-can I ask-”

Your phone begins to chime, it’s one text, then another.

“Oh, sorry,” you interrupt, grabbing your phone off the bed. He watches you unlock your phone and grimace, sticking your tongue out and gag, “this guy is sending my friend dick pics, ugh, gross.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen, feeling the tips of his ears turn redder. He’s never sent anyone a picture of his dick or even thought of it. Hell, he never even had sex before. He wonders how anyone can be brave enough to send pictures of their dick to girls.

“Wow,” you chuckle, pulling your phone back to look from afar. “He’s kinda big actually, damn. Maybe this Taehyung guy isn’t so full of shit after all.”

At this point, Jungkook can feel his eyes nearly pop out of his head. You’re looking at someone’s dick pic right now with him in the same room? Maybe it’s a good thing he doesn’t send girls pictures of his dick because they’d just send it to their friends and laugh about him.

You look impressed though and he wonders exactly what you consider big. Would you think he was average—tiny, even—if he had the chance to have sex with you? God, what if you laughed in his face? Now he’s curious, subtly wiping his sweaty palms on his basketball shorts.

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, wanna see?”

Jungkook nods, unsure if he’ll regret it. What if this Taehyung guy really is big? Bigger than him? Then he’d feel insecure for the rest of his life. Oh god, why’d he even think of this in the first place?

Before he can take it back you’re flipping your phone towards him and all Jungkook can do is gawk. The photo is faceless, just the lower half of someone’s sculpted torso. The lighting is low but bright enough that he can see a large hand wrapped around the base of their cock. The faceless stranger’s hand can hold the entirety of their thick, veiny cock.

This guy really is big, bigger than Jungkook, that’s for sure. All Jungkook can assume about himself is that he’s average… hopefully.

“Heh,” he laughs, trying to avert his eyes elsewhere, but he’s so mesmerized by the vein running down his shaft, “h-he really is.”

“I know,” you mumble in disbelief, taking your phone away to reply to your friend. “She’s wouldn’t be able to walk for weeks!”

Jungkook shifts himself, a feeling of dread and terror running through him. Undeniable arousal runs straight to his cock as he is unable to get the thought of you being fucked by this Taehyung guy out of his head. With a dick like that, you’d surely be a moaning and babbling mess. The way your pretty moans would sound, maybe even more heavenly than your beautiful laughter.

Fuck. Jungkook moves his notes over his crotch to his growing erection, trying to force away his lustful thoughts. Seeing that photo definitely was a mistake, a huge mistake.

You type your response, nails incessantly clicking on the screen once again.

Each time your nail taps it just brings his mind back to you, writhing and whimpering. This time his thoughts aren’t with Taehyung’s thick cock drilling into your tight cunt, it’s his. Your legs wrapped around his waist as he pushes into your perfect, velvet walls, screaming his name.

Click.

Click.

Click.

It’s driving Jungkook insane. If he keeps thinking of you beneath him he’ll lose it.

“If something’s bothering you don’t be afraid to do something about it.”

That’s what you said to him. Before he knows it, he’s reaching over and grabbing your phone out of your hands.

“Hey!”

“Sorry,” he squeaks, hiding it behind his back. “I-I just don’t think we should be texting while we study.”

“Okay, okay, fine. One more message, please,” you cutely pout, batting your eyelashes.

Jungkook knows it won’t be your last message. You’re glued to the thing 24/7.

“You want me to give you your phone back? Make me,” he dares.

Jungkook has no idea where that confidence came from. Maybe it’s his hormones talking. That’s probably it.

He’s starting to regret being so bold and snatching your phone when he sees you roll your eyes, but before he can give it back you’re lunging towards him.

Oh, shit.

He falls back against your bed, pressing himself as close as he can to get away from your body. He makes sure that his notebook is still covering his crotch. You hover over him, unphased and impatient, straddling his thighs.

“Give me my phone, or I’ll lay on you till you suffocate,” you jokingly threaten, pressing your body on top of his.

He gasps softly, turning redder than before. You...you’re not…

“You’re n-not, um, w-wearing anything under that, are you..?” He stutters, feeling the thin fabric of your tee shirt doing nothing to prevent your nipples brushing against his chest.

“What? You mean my bra?” You cock your head, analyzing his pink cheeks and his shifting eyes. “That’s the first thing that comes off when I get home.”

“O-Oh,” he swallows, biting down on his lip to prevent anything else from slipping out.

You push yourself off him, sitting on top of his thigh and dragging your eyes down to the notebook carefully covering his crotch.

Oh, no, he thinks.

“I didn’t think a simple dick pic would turn you on so much,” you say, slowly sliding the notebook off to reveal the tent in his pants.

“S-Sorry, I-I’m sorry,” he apologizes, blushing profusely as he stutters. You’re going to think he’s weird now. Your friendship is ruined. “I didn’t… couldn’t…”

“It’s okay,” you laugh, playing with the hem of his shirt. “Seriously.” After a beat, you ask, “do you want help with that?”

He almost thinks he didn’t hear you correctly. Were you offering to help him with his boner? He lies there mouth agape and wondering how to respond.

“Ah, uh, y-yes,” he nods, nervously licking his dry lips. He’s never done this with anyone else before though. What if he does something stupid? Or what if you’re disappointed he’s not as big as Taehyung was?

As if sensing his dread, you ask, “have you…ever had sex, Jungkook?”

Should he lie and pretend? No, that’s not going to help anyone.

“No,” he admits, slightly embarrassed and ashamed. Most people his age have already lost their virginity, while him on the other hand, has never been in such a position such as this one ever. He’s never had a girl straddle him with any intention to do anything sexual.

“I’m surprised,” you hum, moving your hand beneath the elastic waistband of his shorts. “You’re cute, smart, and funny. A perfect guy.”

“Reall- ah,” he gasps as your hand firmly grips his cock. Your slow strokes along his length have his eyes fluttering shut as his breath becomes shallower. You just called him a perfect guy. He doesn’t know if that’s what is making his heart beat faster or the way your hand moves around his cock.

His lips part and a low whimper escapes him as you pull down his shorts to reveal his length. If you thought he was any smaller or bigger than Taehyung you don’t make any comments.

Jungkook would like to think he was average size, but- Oh.

Your tongue runs up the side of his length before taking him into your mouth. He’s never felt anything like this before. It’s addicting—your lips wrapped perfectly around his cock, sucking him off. His shallow breaths turn ragged, as you bob your head around him.

“Fuck,” he moans, unsure of what to do with his hands. Can he tangle them in your hair or does he just hold the sheets? He chooses the safest option and grabs onto your sheets as his hips buck into your mouth.

He can feel his orgasm approaching. Your mouth continues to suck his cock, flattening your tongue along the shaft. You’re so good at this, so good, everything he dreamed.

His hands move from the bed and tangle in your hair out of instinct. When he feels you moan, he realizes you probably like that. So he tightens his grip, pulling slightly and it gives him the right reaction. You moan again, the vibrations around his cock feel incredible and he groans, bucking his hips until you’re choking around his cock.

Jungkook comes without warning, moaning and spilling down your throat and riding out his orgasm in your mouth. He breathes in, completely amazed and stunned by what just happened.

You pull yourself off him, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. “How was that?”

Jungkook lays there for a few seconds, catching his breath before saying, “wow.”

You laugh, climbing off his lap to settle yourself down beside him.

“C-Can I ask you something though?” You’ve just sucked him off, but somehow he’s back to being nervous around you. He can’t help it.

“Yeah?”

“Do you maybe wanna go on a date with me?”

#bts #bts smut #jungkook smut #btssmutclub #bangtanarmynet #kwritersworldnet #btsguild #bts fanfiction #jungkook fanfiction #bts scenarios #bts drabbles #bts reactions #jungkook x reader

[sunnymegatron]

Porn Reviews w/ Yvette d'Entremont & Alice Vaughn - Ep 135

What’s it like being the Siskel & Ebert of porn? Find out on ep 135 of American Sex Podcast! Yvette d'Entremont and Alice Vaughn from the Two Girls One Mic podcast tell us how they stumbled into porn reviewing and where it’s taken them. We talk about the plots and details of classic adult films like Behind the Green Door, Deep Throat, and Debbie Does Dallas, plus analyze how well they’ve aged. We dive into porn parodies too like Fap to the future, ET The Extra Testicle, and more. If you’re looking for solid recommendations for your next adult movie, they’ve got them! There’s lots of laughs and wild stories in this conversation too-- like the time Alice & Yvette called the FBI on an unsolicited dick pic sender!

Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to [email protected]

To support American Sex podcast, please visit patreon.com/americansex (plus you’ll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!)

Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com

Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter 

 Sunny & Ken, xo!

____________________________________

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[watchmoatburn]

Moat Master List (WIP)

This is VERY work in progress, I’ll be fixing links and adding things here and there as I go.

Sometime in 2018

Moat puts entire community in danger by giving ‘Jenny’ administration access. Jenny was a man pretending to be a girl to fuck with Moat, effectively cat fishing him. Previous community lead Jay and several previous devs Footsies and Velkon step up to call Moat out on his shit.

February, 2019

Moat approaches a minor about selling nudes, proposes a business offer when she turns 18.

May, 2019

Lovely & Meepen discuss development mismanagement.

July, 2019

Moat tells his staff to essentially fuck off after staff scolded him for promoting a member that had been punished with a demotion.

Players/staff leave after Moat’s blow up which bled out of staff chat.

More community division.

Moat holds a Q&A to minimize damages, many questions were left unanswered, other questions were left with vague responses and “Good feels” replies, completely dodging the issues presented.

Lovely leaves creative team after Moat answers his criticisms of development/creative team management with “ dude when do any of us get recognition, that's why i pay you so much money... “

August, 2019

Moat bans community leader & developer Meepen for unbanning a player that Moat himself wrongfully banned. Entirety of management destabilizes as players, staff, and veterans all alike leave.

Veteran player Malk and community lead Leo come back to the community to assist Moat in stabilizing the community as players transition away. Moat later harassed Malk out of the community, Leo would be driven out much later.

Meepen leaves development of Moat.gg, goes to start up Pluto.gg

September, 2019

Moat harasses Malk and drives him out of the community, Malk (who inherited discord ownership from Moat so he could more effectively help the community) passed Discord ownership onto Velkon.

Moat harasses Mae with unsolicited dick pics (NSFW)

Moat harassing more members with unsolicited dick pics

Ling leaves development

Velkon leaves development, hands Discord ownership to Leo.

Velkon kicks Moat from his own steam group, renames it and changes the group image. The Steam group is still active but is not being used for anything.

October, 2019

Moat says he’s too bored of Gmod and can’t work on it anymore.

Moat accuses Leo of stealing the community, promptly harasses him for Discord ownership, begins banning staff members, black mailing staff, and breaks the forums (disrupting staff operations) to force Leo into giving Discord ownership back.

Further explanation on Moat’s accusations.

Leo spawns items for players.

Suess & Leo leave the community.

Moat takes a break and checks into a psychological hospital for several days. Moat gives Ekksdee the Discord’s ownership and Meepen was given rights to manage the servers in his leave. Moat comes back as jaded as ever, completely unchanged from the visit.

The Moat.gg discord (of 27k+ players) was deleted by Ekksdee.

Further explanation on why Ekksdee may have deleted it.

December, 2019

Inventory bug/wipe occurs, a bug that has occurred on a much smaller scale in the past. Moat claims it to be a virus the previous devs used to the attack the server, no proof has been given. Moat refuses to acknowledge the severity of the bug and instead first calls it a visual glitch, then attempts to fix it three more times. Moat address the community by telling everyone to submit compensation reports despite Moat having never read compensation reports himself.

Community proposes community-wide wipe to remedy players losing their items into the void. Moat follows through with the idea and downplays the whole event as being part of a “Beta” and that the community wide wipe is the beginning of Beta 2. There were never planned betas, he simply said it was a beta to minimize damage so the entire event appears intentional.

George steps up as Community Lead, then leaves after a disagreement with Moat. Other staff members like Zomb follow with as many staff were displeased with how Moat handled the server wipe/bug.

January, 2020

Moat claims servers were blacklisted because of “awesome DDos protection,” in reality the Moats servers were blacklisted from the browser because the servers used a ping spoofer.

Players begin receiving random amounts of money after the server wipe, a demonstration of further instabilities.

February, 2020

Moat contacts Steam support to try and get his old community group that he left, back. They tell him he left voluntarily and that they will not restore him the group.

March, 2020

Assorted

Racist Moat

Inventory 2, a complete and fully functional upgrade to the inventory you will never get.

Moat says doxxing isn’t illegal, threatens to doxx someone.

[chloemill]

On threesomes, tacos and The Office

Well, it’s been a while, hasn’t it? (-me, every single goddamn blog I write) I’m not going to wax poetic on my lack of motivation because, well, I do that every single post and also every single day in the prison of my own mind BUT! Here I am. Let’s just get on with it.

As most of you know, I am single. [thunderous applause from the crowd] please… please, thank you so much, please let me finish. After a solid consecutive five-ish years spent in back-to-back relationships, before which I’d been a crippingly insecure college student content to desperately make out with whatever pasty and emotionally stunted upperclassman would squeeze my boob, I’d never really dipped my toes into the dating app world until the last seven months or so. And I have to say: I am… well? I’m disgusted. It’s no secret that women on the apps match with exponentially more men than the other way around, and given what I’ve seen of men’s profiles, it’s not hard to see why. Men are out here in the virtual streets acting like goddamn buffoons and still expecting sex to be bestowed upon them. It’s a travesty, and nevertheless, it persists. It’s often said you need to be the change you wish to see in the world. So I’ve decided to take matter into my own hands. I present to you: my definitive list of dating app pet peeves.

- The Office quotes. I have to get it out of the way first, or it’ll gnaw at my soul. We all love The Office. It’s one of the greatest comedies of all time. So great that every fucking idiot this side of the Mississippi lists it as one of their top three TV shows. Cut it the fuck out. No mention of it! No “assistant to the regional manager”, no “looking for the Pam to my Jim”, no “Employed at: Dunder Mifflin”, please, for the love of God, shut the fuck up. At this point I’d honestly rather see a blurry, unhygienic and unsolicited dick pic than read “Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica” in some mediocre looking Brayden’s profile. Oh, and if you think you’re off the hook because you quoted Parks and Rec instead? You’re fucking not, Tanner. Watch another show.

- “Kid not mine!!!!!!” Yes, my instinct was that a 24-year-old named Brett on a dating app created for the primary purpose of fucking strangers was going to upload a picture of his infant child as his main photo for which to attract female mates. I’m glad you clarified

- Grown, of age, adult, matured, human men using Snapchat filters and/or boomerangs. This might be the biggest one of all, and that’s saying something. A photo of a man with an artificially round cherub face and giant virtual sparkly anime eyes or, even worse, a squinty boomerang trying desperately to accentuate his weak jawline… sends a chill down the spine. I hate to perpetuate gender roles, but I feel I’m justified in saying straight men aren’t allowed to use Snapchat filters. And boomerangs are only for hot girls making kissy faces and clinking their drinks together - at this point, it’s basically cultural appropriation to use them if you don’t fit that profile. Please, I beg of you, summon a shred of goddamn dignity from the depths of your broken soul and delete the boomerang.

- Jumping off of that last one: emoji use. Again, I mean, I hate to impose the confines of traditional masculinity on anyone, but the monkey-covering-his-eyes emoji has never helped anyone seal the deal. I mean that.

- “Not looking for anything serious” Chad, you have the Macklemore haircut and are wearing American flag swim trunks. I promise you, no one assumed you were looking for something serious

- Mentioning tacos/pizza/[insert delicious and popular food item here]. Look, I am a feminist, and in the spirit of equality I must point out that women pioneered this trend and still perpetuate it heavily - a pattern sociologists have termed the “touch my butt and feed me tacos phenomenon”. However, men have latched onto it in what I can only assume is an eleventh-hour attempt to draw in this demo. Please cease and desist. Everyone likes tacos, Caleb

- The other day I saw a guy on Hinge say his ideal dinner guest was Peter Kavinsky and I’ve never seen anyone else say that but honestly fuck you dude. Fuck you

- When guys are trying to stay anonymous and post a low-quality shirtless torso pic without showing their face…? Has anyone ever actually swiped right on that? I kind of respect the blind confidence, but still.

- ”[insert height here]… because I’ve been told it matters” stop with the qualifier, just tell us how tall you are and go, you coward. Honestly, I think the ideal male dating app profile for me is just 3 grainy vaguely attractive pictures and “6’3” as a bio.

- “In town for the weekend… show me around?” Firstly, that sounds absolutely harrowing. Secondly, I’d respect you more if you just said “in NYC for 24 hours and trying to get it in” than pretend like you’re searching for Sacajawea to show you the new world. It’s NYC. Google it

- Any of the following descriptors: easygoing, laid-back, outgoing, “loves travel/fine dining/yoga/hiking/Netflix/some other generic hobby white people like to talk about”, intelligent, chill, fun, low-key, “up for whatever”, hard-working, humble, etc. These are not bad qualities per se, but anyone who describes themselves as such is 110% guaranteed to be deeply boring.

- I was just swiping to find some more overused descriptive phrases and someone’s bio was “the Earth is cylindrical”… you have my attention, sir

- Guys with accents specifying in their profile that they have an accent. I cannot tell you what an enormous boner killer this is. Do you know what’s a huge turn ON? Being into a guy and then meeting him for the first time and realizing he has a sexy ass accent. You know what’s not a huge turn on? A random English dude you didn’t match with leaving you a 45-second Instagram voice DM (this is a thing somehow) in which he hits on you and then goes “oh… and yeah… I have an accent. Crazy, isn’t it?” Yes, this really happened. Still accepting thoughts and prayers.

- Couples looking for threesomes. This is a delicate process and making a joint profile with “she’s bicurious. He’s straight. We both like kissing girls. Looking for someone to explore with :)” is not only cringeworthy as all motherfuck, but completely ineffective. Listen, I get it. I get that after four years, Tommy and Kayleigh are trying to spice things up. Order a pair of fuzzy handcuffs on Amazon and leave me the hell out of it. Also - every single one of these couples has a very… wide male/female attractiveness margin. Kayleigh can hit me up on her own.

I’m going to stop here because I’m just making myself depressed at this point. It’s really a jungle out there. The truth of it is we’re all braver than the goddamn troops every time we swipe, and I salute each of you out there in the trenches with me. May your monkey emojis be infrequent and your threesome requests be infrequent-er! If worse comes to worse, there’s always arranged marriage.

[chicagoanon]

So what exactly is harmful adult content?

While the notification from Tumblr tries to explain their "noble" gesture to protect us all from the evils of the world, aka "pornagraphic" content, this action raises more questions than provides answers. First of all, make no mistake, the Apple Store ban on the Tumblr app had to have a big influence on this. Why? Money. But how, the app is free? Sure is, but revenue generated by the ads and user telemetry is real. And Tumblr is owned by a corporation, so hurting income is a no no. Tumblr is owned by Oath, who is owned by Verizon. So to get its app to generate money, changes had to be made. It's also image...in 2019 Oath is rebranding itself to Verizon. You can't have a company like that associated with the smut on Tumblr, now, can you? But for me, the idea of what is harmful adult content is very subjective. Sure, porn bots and underage porn is a problem, but why not institute controls to remove those items from your community. That would be better than alienating a percentage of your users and telling them they are not welcome here. Here is an idea...how about instituting a way to report unsolicited dick pics and porn bot followers and you deal with those cases. What Tumblr is doing is the equivalent of banning all cookies because they don't like snicker doodles. So other than porn, are you going to target other adult content that someone might be offended by? Are you going to remove references to drugs and alcohol? Are you going to get rid of racist and hate talk? How about illegal use of copyrighted content and artwork? What about posts about video games, television shows, and movies that are intended for mature audiences? Foul language? Posts about firearms? Are these also potentially harmful adult content? My point? There is no quicker way to kill a community faster than telling that community what they should be posting and viewing. How they should think. What they should care about. Unless that is what you are trying to do...kill off Tumblr.

#tumblr #tumblrban #tumblrstaff

[rationaromanceblog]

Dating 101

There is something to be said about unremarkable first dates. I tend to distrust great first dates, and luckily I rarely have disastrous ones. Whenever I happen to be in the middle of a disaster date, I take solace that the story will at least make an interesting anecdote for later rendezvous. Great first dates, I find, rarely go anywhere. I don’t quite understand the phenomena; except that maybe the people who are great at dating from the get-go do it for fun, and therefore aren’t looking for a prolonged thing. These people make great casual sex friends, if they ever do return your texts. Unremarkable first dates, however, generally turn a profit. Hence my Three Date Rule (patent pending). Three dates are my minimum requirement for any potential suitor. The only exception being if the first date was an aforementioned ‘disaster date’, I have no set definition for what characterizes these dates but they tend to be obvious, trust your gut. 

Unremarkable first dates are common. Too often people will not go on second ones, holding on to hope that the next person will be everything they want immediately, or take it to mean there was nothing to be explored further. This is a fatal flaw. It takes three solid meetings for people to get comfortable around each other. That is when you let someone know who you are, and when you will truly know anything.  Even if you have been messaging for a long time and you think you have a good idea who this person is, interacting in person is a vastly different experience. I have been on numerous first dates I presumed would go nowhere. Because I was not deterred by the first date fallacy, many led to meaningful connections I couldn’t have imagined. In the way you can’t judge a book by its movie and you shouldn’t judge a show by it’s pilot, you can’t judge a relationship by it’s first date. 

The key is to have an open mind. If you begrudge date number two because of an arbitrary rule, you will miss out on the potential in front of you. Dare to believe that there could be more here, even if they don’t meet most items on the checklist you’re keeping in your pocket. Believe that date three will be when that fuller picture comes into view. There’s a good chance you will find something about someone you like. Something that never occured to you to put on your list. 

There are plenty of dating tips I could throw out there.  Don’t judge people too harshly on their pictures, would be one. Don’t text for longer than a week before meeting each other. Vary what you do on your date; don’t just move-dinner-drink every date. Walk, do an activity, laugh. These would all be sensible advice to follow based on solid evidence. But my third date rule is the rule I am most adamant about. It is the rule I see so many of my friends ignore looking for that “spark” that will be the magic signal to their eternal happiness.  This is the rule that has led me to my most significant loves.

Personally, I love dating. Once the initial trauma of a relationship ending has subsided, I thrill at the opportunity. I think it has to do with my introversion, ironically. Being an introvert I can’t just go out and interview potential friends over the internet with obvious intentions. (I’ve tried, nobody buys it.) But I can absolutely do that with potential partners. With the added benefit that they already find some aspect of me appealing enough to be there. I become my most charming on dates. The prospect of wanting to impress someone with all that I am becomes a fun game. I find there to be great  excitement in possibility. One of these strangers could become someone important to me soon. The suspense is killing me, who might it be? Not a lot of people stuck around if we didn’t click romantically, but my favorite unforeseen outcome of this way of dating were the ones that turned into friendships. They became such pleasant additions to my world. 

 I think another crucial error people make is not enjoying dating. Dating can become a chore, and if it is for you, please stop doing it or take a break. There are ways to enjoy it, and you will be much more likely to be successful at your aim if you are. If not you will at the least stick it out longer.  I learn so much about myself when I date, every date is an opportunity to see which version of me comes out. Will I be quick and quirky? Sarcastic and challenging? Fun and flirty? Only the evening knows and I find it great fun to find out. 

When you’re on a date you have a choice. That choice is all about where your attention focuses. It is easy to approach a date listing all the ways they are not someone you can see yourself with. If you look for those reasons you will find them. Don’t date with expectations to be dazzled while you cross your arms and judge. Everyone has something to offer. Have you thrown away that list yet? I know you have it hidden somewhere. It won’t matter anyway we both know you have it memorized.  You don’t actually know what you want, because you don’t actually know what’s available. There is no perfect, there is no ideal. Everybody sucks and everybody is epic. Whatever attitude you bring to your dates is what will be proven true. 

Quick public service announcement: I understand I am quite privileged as a girl dating on the internet. Aside from callous ‘DTF?’ messages, crude pick up lines, the bombardment of messages and potential unsolicited dick pics, I personally think I have it easier compared to my male counterparts. Not to gloat, but I like being the one with the inbox full and not the one being ignored because the guy in the message above you said “How are you?” not just “Hey.”  Regardless, I always make a point to reach out to men first, the same way I make sure to ask guys to dance when I am at a club. I’ve never been one to remain passive, if I complain about gender roles I also find it my responsibility to break them. The amount of arguing I’ve had with men that will not let me pay on a date is surprising. I assume they think I am testing them, or they feel an obligation to. Even splitting it will elicit raised eyebrows, no I won't mark off points if you let me pay, but I suppose there are women out there who will. If that’s you please stop, equality is not always convenient. 

Eventually I just put it on my profile that I want to pay for dates too. I found that the degree of man I started to attract changed. Ones that shared my value systems probably. That is another crucial dating tactic, the tried and true: BE YOUR GODDAMN SELF. It’s harder than you think to be you. It’s a lot easier to be who you think they want you to be, since that will certainly elicit much less rejection ultimately. Rejection fucking sucks. It’s like we’re biologically hardwired to avoid it or something. But rejection is an inescapable part of dating for everyone, and the faster you learn not to take it personally when someone doesn’t like you, the less painful this process will be. Self esteem, I’d say, is a prerequisite to healthy dating. But since you can’t currently buy the stuff on the internet, it’s not that easy to come by if you haven’t already found some. Let me just say that, when you already like yourself, it matters a lot less that the cute girl you day dreamed about walking on a beach with stopped answering your messages because you made a hilarious yet dark joke and how could she not think it was funny. It might still be a bummer, but it won’t drive you into a dark spiral. 

Last and not least, learn to fill your every need. I struggled with this one most of all. I couldn’t wrap my mind around what a partner was for if I was just going to fill my own needs  anyway. Dating for this purpose is a doomed prospect, you will find yourself playing a game with the person. Each of you will either change who you are so that the other can be happier, turning into a stranger. Or resent each other because they cannot meet your every need just right. So you end up leaving, for the eternal search of someone who can. If you don’t believe me try it for yourself and come back when you realize I am right. At some point we all inherited the notion that partners complete us. But what if we are already complete? Now what? Being with someone is your opportunity to love. That’s it.  Loving someone feels amazing. It is fulfilling, fun, and it can add dimension to your life. Being with someone will also be stressful, terrifying and put you at a giant risk for heartache. That’s the deal. Have fun.

#dating #dating tips #love #relationships #relationship advice #lifestyle blog #rational romance

[flatrichard]

so men will still send unsolicited dick pics/ask you for nudes even if they know you are pregnant and in a relationship, eh?

never change, fellas.

on the plus side, my boss gave me two boxes of her old maternity clothes yesterday. i have jeans now! she must have been tiny though because two of the items are too small for me already lol.

#why? #personal

[moredickpics-blog]

The Dick Pic Generation And Why We’re Still Stupid About Nudity

Millennials are what I call “The Dick Pic Generation”.

We’re the Dick Pic Generation because we have the technology. If the Baby Boomers had the technology, they definitely would have tried.

Instead, Boomers vacuumed up the wealth and polluted the Earth so now the dubious honour of polluting the world with terabytes of our junk has fallen to us Millennials.

But make no mistake, it’s not because of our horned up culture that makes us do it, it’s nature. Older generations, if given the opportunity would have done the exact same thing.

My question is, seeing as how there is this compulsion for humans to be gross, should there really be such an outrage we share pictures of our naked bodies?

To be clear, I don’t mean sending out other people’s nudes, or sending/receiving them uninvited. I mean that people lose their jobs and get tarnished for doing something that yes, is primarily a private matter, but also a deeply human experience: being gross with other people and using what technology we have available to enable that.

There’s plenty of stories of people getting canned for what they put out on social media, and we all more or less understand when you mock a war widow or post a photo of you urinating on a plate of nachos that it’s not something your employer wants reflected on them.

But the same goes for a teacher drinking alcohol, or having sexy bikini pics, or an ex-boyfriend posting their nudes online. And that’s fucking bullshit.

“Teacher fired for bikini pics” came back with over 9 million results on Google. Progress against revenge porn is slow, but ongoing, thankfully. But the attitude is still largely, “well, you took the pictures in the first place, that makes you the idiot.”

Nudity has power because of its scarcity, and because there’s a deep shame forced on all of us to think of it as both precious and perverted. While there are terabytes of naked people floating around the world, and porn is a multi-billion dollar industry, and strip clubs bring in $7 billion in the US alone, there persists this bloody hypocrisy about the naked body or near-naked body.

Let’s understand why this isn’t working.

Sexuality often takes the brunt of cultural hypocrisy. I’m certainly guilty of it. I cringe anytime someone points out “what, we’re all naked under our clothes, we’re all sexual beings. It’s natural.”

Being a bit of a prude, I get it’s a true statement but still operate with the bias that it’s gross to point out. “Come on, it’s natural, it’s natural.”

Yuck. Stop that… Unless they’re hot.

But being open about it is punishable by ostracism not because it’s gross in the same way braiding armpit hair is (come on, it’s natural) but because there’s some deeply fucked up psychology that punishes sexuality. Especially as a woman, you’ll be called a whore in places if you express sexual agency and experience worse if men even suspect it.

It doesn’t change anything though. Our DNA is older than our belief systems. People are sexual, and people are gross. What we should try not to be however, is a hypocrite about it.

As a couple examples, they did a study that found sexting occurs mostly on weekdays between 10am and Noon. On Tuesday specifically.

A study by Drexel University found a majority of teens engaged in sexting without knowing it technically counts as child pornography.

In 2012 the Pentagon had to tell its employees to stop looking at pornography at work. The Pentagon, the monolithic symbol of American military might, had to ask its employees to stop using work computers for porn.

I know exactly what you’re thinking right now, “But Mark, why the penis which is objectively ugly?” Here’s my rule: All genitals are ugly until we want to put our mouths on them. We can’t escape that. We’re not Gods.

If you’re in an increasingly erotic chat with someone and it eventually gets to nude shots of their bum, tits, vaj or cock, it creates excitement and anticipation. It makes you cry out “O Joyous Occasion!” as you rub yourself through your sweatpants (be honest). You get into talking about what you’re into and it’s hot and titillating. That’s hormones and nature, not culture. Ask Weiner. But don’t text him.

But those interactions are about two people who are into it. What about one party who’s unwitting and unwilling about the whole thing?

A survey found 53% of Millennial women have received a dick pic. 24% of the men in that same survey admitted to sending a dick pic without being asked. The survey doesn’t head on address the question “but was it heavily implied it was okay or just totally out of the blue?”

This was my reaction, because dick pics can be contextual in the same way any nudes are. They can be tastefully and appropriately submitted into conversation, or like a ham-fisted joke can be just bad writing and timing.

Well, of the 53% of women who received a dick pic, three out of four say they received it unsolicited and unwanted.

Apparently God’s gift to man is man’s shockingly poor gift choice to women.

In another article on AlterNet, they surveyed seven types of reasons men sent dick pics. These reasons included an exhibition kink or thrill they experienced, or a swelling of pride, thinking it’s what women want to see, thinking it was a cheeky sexual invitation, or doing it for dominance and control, or for positive feedback, or simply because they can because hey it’s magical Internet and we’re anonymous.

Most of these reasons are just sad. Doing it for domination and to stress someone out is just a dick move. Doing it because you’ve been ignored by countless women and just want to get some kind of reaction is, well, sad. It’s sad that guys feel driven to this, and that their loneliness and alienation makes them bitter and resentful. I’m pretty sure this fuels a lot of the misogyny we see today in these Men’s Rights Groups.

Quick aside: In that earlier article linked to about revenge porn, a woman ended her relationship with her possessive boyfriend and he angrily accused her of sleeping with at least three male friends based on looking at her Facebook pictures. He threatened to sell her nudes online unless she was honest about how many guys she slept with.

Ooof.

On the more forgiving side of things, philosopher Alain de Botton says we guys share dick pics to share something vulnerable about ourselves as the genitals can be a source of disgust and shame. By sharing our bodies we are both vulnerable and connected, and because sex is a major fact of life there is something theoretically tantalizing about genital shots.

To artist Whitney Bell, who turned unsolicited dick pics into an art exhibit, sending dick pics is also an expression of power. She creatively robbed the power of those unwanted pictures by turning them into art (more “Piss Christ” art than the Sistine Chapel kind).

Bell believes it’s a way for men to terrorize women, like “screaming at a woman from a car. You’re just doing this because you can, and because the world has taught you that that’s OK.”

This Everyday Feminism article calls unwanted dick pics “sexual assault”.

Then again…

Watch out! Patriarchy!

I frankly think this gives men too much credit. Men tend to be visually inclined, they respond to filth and think others, particularly women, do too. Have you ever looked at personal ads on Craigslist? It’s better than charades at parties. What you’ll find though is both earnest ads looking for monogamous love and depraved ads looking for sex, and both are accompanied by cock shots.

Because, for as many men that are terrible there are just as many that are kinda clueless. Never attribute to malice what you could attribute to lazy, horny, socially inept, one-handed texting.

Men are not smart enough to be cruel enough—most guys anyway. Maybe some men think that perhaps out of a hundred sent dick pics the one person that actually bites and wants to meet up to get some of that sweet dick is worth the ninety-nine who feel violated looking at impromptu genitals?

But what do I know? I’m one in a hundred.

Of course this doesn’t mean there aren’t assholes out there who know it can be distressing for a girl to receive a dick pic and do it anyway. They exist. The Internet exaggerates that capacity, empowering men to be more flagrant and direct with harassment at the same time being anonymous. And there certainly is a power dynamic when one sex has their genitals normalized enough they can send it willy-nilly and the other sex is so thoroughly demotivated they could never send pics of their vulvas or whatever they’re called. Vaginas.

So let’s make a distinction: There’s a dick pic, and there’s an unsolicited and unwanted dick pic. I have never received an unsolicited dick pic and thought “Ooh! Future husband!”

But never say never. I’m open to it, is what I’m saying.

Thousands of people have lost their jobs because their  nude photos wound up on the Internet, and there’s an oppressive and stupid shame that perpetuate this arrangement. Here’s one such list article that basically repeats itself on items 2, 3, 4, and 5:

It Can Ruin Your Career

The Photos Can End Up On The Internet

Or They Can Up In The Wrong Hands

They Can Live On Forever

What articles like this say is that your naked body has negative power over you. But nude photos have only as much power as we give them, and they have been drastically inflated.

We kneecap people’s potentials for what they can do with their lives because there’s evidence they’re naked under their clothes. Nude bodies should not be leverage against their owners.

At least when we ostracize someone for pooping in public there’s actually a good many reasons to. But calling a girl a slut, or believing her unlovable because she has nude photos on Tumblr?

We got here because our sex education was terrible. We weren’t taught human nature properly as a kind of capacity for different beliefs and actions, sometimes at odds with each other. We weren’t taught about biology, upbringing, cultural imprinting and institutional enforcement.

But without that we are far likelier to be worse hypocrites. It’s how we’ve become hypocrites about something that, come on, is natural.

We’re at war with our nature and we’re worse for it. Society is deeply unhappy. Relationships end badly and frequently, antidepressants are prescribed in ever-more numbers.

Lastly I have to ask, what is going to change first though, human nature or our attitude towards our nature?

What do we have power over? Humans are always going to be perverted apes on some level, but we don’t have to be hypocrites.

We have power over our education systems if we choose it, and that’s how we can be less hypocrites about such fundamentally human experiences.

Obviously it’s our attitudes that need to change, as it slowly has been.

In many parts of the world, women can show ankles. Praise God. Women can vote, hold public office, and even marry who they choose. That’s because our attitudes changed.

Cultural change is slow and nebulous, but it’s an aggregate of a thousand interactions and decisions by individuals trending toward sometimes vaguely outlined normatives. We can outline those normatives because we can control our attitudes.

Repeat that five times and send nudes.

[socialattractionuk]

The new iPhone 11 Pro camera is a dream for ‘cockfish’

Items may appear larger than they are in real life (Picture: Getty)

We all know about the inimitable imitator, the catfish. They use fake pictures and identities to convince people online to have relationships with them.

For the cockfish, however, no identity fraud is necessary. Just some photo editing skills or tiny 50ps to put next to your penis and make it seem bigger.

The life of a cockfish has also just got exceptionally easier, with the new iPhone release proving to be an absolute boon.

The iPhone 11 Pro has various wide-angle and telephoto lenses for zoom shots, meaning you can adjust the way your junk looks on camera.

Unsurprisingly, people are already testing out the theory.

iphone 11 pro….boys, we got em pic.twitter.com/ceT43KNUGN

— william (@writhewill) September 24, 2019

Nope, that’s not a freakishly long banana he’s got on his hands there, but a skillfully positioned and calibrated iPhone designed to trick any potential suitors or hungry people craving bananas.

Some pointed out that this is the exact same thing others have already been doing with filters and good angles for ages.

Others lamented the fact that they’re now going to have to ensure they video call before setting up a booty call, just to make sure that the advertised goods match up to those on offer IRL.

One tweeter even suggested a phone sharing scheme so those who aren’t too well endowed can take their pictures to use later and then pass on the next person in need.

can i borrow someone’s iphone 11 so i can take a cock pic

— milk (official page) (@milkinhisbag) September 25, 2019

i already sent 10 of these. im telling ladies its 12 inches and that i was a science experiment in a russian lab back in 2004

— GK (@geekoiii) September 25, 2019

That hasn’t stopped some people taking full advantage of the cockfishing they can achieve with the lens.

While we certainly wouldn’t recommend catfishing, cockfishing, or any type of online date fishing, we can see the pull.

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However (and sorry to kill the buzz) penis size is not what defines you, and many people actually prefer smaller and medium sized members.

They also prefer not to be sent any unsolicited dick pics, so regardless of how proud you are with your new found schlong, please don’t go bandying it around without consent.

Other than that, feel free to go forth and make use of your new device – your iPhone 11, that is.

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[jillmckenzie1]

The Silver Lining – Online Dating on the Road

Once upon a time, in a galaxy not so far away, I came across a guy on Bumble who immediately proclaimed in his bio that faith was the number quality that he was looking for in a woman. Okay. He then proceeded to say how much he loved positivity and hated photo filters: “Real is beautiful.” You got it, bud. I second the filter hate train. I mean, I’ll send you a dumbass video of me with cheeseburgers circling around my head, but a hard no on the cat ears for public visibility. In true Stephanie fashion, I led with: “Should I start sending all my Snapchat filter selfies now or later?” (don’t worry, the answer is yes, I do amuse myself). Here’s the part where you sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. His response: “Funny, Funny. I wonder what a vagina looks like filtered? Huh [insert light bulb emoji]. I have an idea. Test it out for us. Send me one both ways. I’ll let you know [insert smiley face emoji].”

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

Yep, this actually happened. Seriously. I responded and questioned why, on any planet in any point in time, he believed this response would be an acceptable way to speak to a woman. Ever. I recall using words like “disgusting” and “degrading” (I’m sure the screenshot is somewhere deep in the abyss of my iPhotos if you need evidence). His response? He was joking. Right. Super funny, dude. Real funny. Report. Block. Terminate. Bye.

If you’re single, you’re not surprised by this story. If you’re in a relationship, I hope to God you are completely astounded. And, while I often think dating apps are the absolute devil, it is also the current means to an end. Are you even a real single person if you are not on a dating app? Not even kidding. Okay, slight over exaggeration, but truly, never in our wildest teen years did us 30-something-year-olds imagine using our phones to score a significant other (AIM, sure, but not our phones).

So, I exist in my current reality. Fact: I’m single. Fact: I’m transient. Fact: I’d like to be in a relationship. Fact: I don’t care whether or not that relationship exists in a transient or stationary state. So, yes, if our vibe is high and you want to hop in the Airstream and explore every end of the earth, great. If you work in a job you love in a city that you call home, ask me to stay. Let’s ride the wave. Together. Because, seriously, doing life with someone who really gets you better than anyone else ever could is the real damn deal.

Back to dating. I don’t think anyone actually dates anymore. I am actually convinced that it’s not really a thing these days. There’s like pre-dating in which you entertain the idea of actually dating. And then there is friend-zoning or jumping deep into the abyss of quasi-matrimony. I speak with experience from the former, not the latter. And, mark my words, “friends with benefits” is so hot right now. I actually went toe-to-toe with two guy friends at a bar last weekend in a pursuit to convince them that the typical Millennial male is more often than not seeking a friend with whom he can simply have sex than an actual committed relationship (let’s just say they didn’t disagree). Because, I actually do believe that most men do not want to sleep around with handfuls of random girls. They seem to be perplexed by their own paradoxical existence of not wanting anything serious (i.e. being forced to attend your grandma’s 80th birthday with you) while simultaneously wanting to have sex as much as humanly possible.

Let me present to you exhibit A.

I moved to Denver in my Airstream last spring. I met a guy on Bumble who happened to be on the way to a bachelor party for the weekend. I assumed we would engage in an hour-long text conversation that would end with him asking me to send nudes or with him sending me a completely unsolicited dick pic (because, yes, as you can assume from the above scenario, guys really do that). I’d tell him to (a) Google a nude, any nude (most certainly not mine), if that’s what he wanted, or (b) I’d cuss him out for exposing himself like a disturbed and arrogant asshole, and I’d add another tally to my list of douchebags found in the wild.

Welp, surprisingly, he proved me wrong. Beyond that, he actually seemed interested in who I was as a human being, and he proceeded to text me non-stop over the course of the weekend. While at a bachelor party (I feel that this detail needs repeating).

So, he returns home three days later and we commit to actually meeting face to face (like, whoa). And, for lack of a better word, it’s flawless. We’re super funny together (priority one), conversation is natural, and chemistry is fire. We hang out for a few weeks, which inevitably leads to sex. Immediately, he drops the bomb: let’s be friends. Let’s. Be. Friends? Oh wait, I’m sorry, correction, let’s be BEST friends. Perfect. Great. Because, I’m really lacking in the best friend department (insert massive eye roll here).

At this point, I assume it will die out. I assume that he used the nice guy “let’s be friends” card in an attempt to save my feelings and he will vanish as quickly as he had appeared. But, no. He quite literally continues to pursue my friendship. For a month he asks me to do nearly everything with him. He also proceeds to pay for everything: climbing, concerts, movies. Let’s note here that he also proceeds to take my clothes off on a semi-regular basis (despite his constant commentary on us needing rules to prevent such happenings). Final bomb: after a Luke Bryan concert, while sitting on a bench enveloped by a Colorado night sky, he tells me that he loves my soul. I’m sorry, what? Like, we are dating, bro. We. Are. DATING. I don’t care what you title me, but let’s call this thing by its Urban Dictionary definition. He follows up this statement with the fact that I simply deserve better. One, I think I am being dumped for the first time without ever actually having been in an established relationship. Two, fuck off. No one gets to tell me what I deserve. I decide that. So, no, I don’t deserve better. You simply deserve less based on your own evaluation of whatever this thing is that we’re doing. Say that, please. Own that.

So, spring came. And, spring went.

Summer roared in like a lion, and I committed myself to rock faces and mountain peaks, two things that I find to be (surprisingly) much more predictable than men. I also dove even deeper into my work (don’t worry, the digital dating gods still delivered amidst my commitment to my professional projects).

Enter exhibit B.

As a freelance creative director and brand strategist, I work remotely for all of my clients. Idaho. California. Kentucky. Texas. I sometimes wonder if I have a subconscious goal to knock off all 50 states. With all that being said, I met a guy in another state who pursued me completely on his own accord. My vision had always been to travel with my Airstream, but I was never 100% certain on dates. This guy gets my number, he uses round-about questions to engage me in some witty banter, and low and behold he says, “Move down here and I’ll fix all your dating problems.” Wow. Bold statement. I like it. So, after a couple months in this state of flirting euphoria, I commit (amongst a sea of many factors, but I’m intrigued by what’s happening here). He calls me pet names and we have running jokes, and if you know me, these are the keys to my heart. So, I’m smitten kitten. Without any expectation of what will actually become of it. If anything.

The point here is that I show up. I have the luxury of saying yes and then doing something about it. I want to be next to him, so I choose that. Because his voice brings this uncanny smile to my face, and when his name appears on my iPhone notifications, there is a simultaneous level of excitement and comfort. He is fireworks, and he is coming home. And the beauty lies not only in the feeling, but also in the reciprocation of the feeling. Because, there is zero bone in my body that has interpreted anything that he’s told me as being untrue.

Until I’m there. Until I’m standing in front of him begging for every inch of contact. And, that alone becomes the culmination of months of aggressive flirting. Me. Begging (like, seriously, just kiss me before I scream). Because he likes me, but he doesn’t know. I’m sorry, what? Yes, he likes me, but he doesn’t know. Because, self-admittedly, he is a tease. And, he likes it, even though he’s not proud of it (his words, not mine). Perfect. Great. Because, my character flaw is not consuming enough water daily. The effect of this flaw on other people: zero.

At this point, I need to clarify two things. One, I respect people who have an awareness about what they do not know. There is nothing wrong with not knowing. I would take harsh honesty over a sugar-coated lie ten times out of ten. My frustration or disappointment or bewilderment exists in the actions that suggest otherwise. I get it, the pursuit is fun, but if you are not ready to take the elk out of the woods after the hunt, then why are you going hunting in the first place? Terrible metaphor, by the way, but rolling with it. Two, I do not believe in forcing anything in life. I spent far too many years making things happen in the pursuit of checking off items from some proverbial checklist (which is entirely bullshit, by the way). So, for someone not to choose me does not devastate my being. Yes, I have feelings. Lots of them. Too many of them, probably (hello, Leo over here). But, in a world where we get to choose everything (for argument’s sake), I’m not into forcing anyone into a choice that involves me.

What I have observed in this last eighteen months of singledom is that no one wants to commit. To anything. There is no need to commit to anything. Most guys are on dating apps to have sex. Okay, rephrase, most guys are on dating apps posing like they want something substantial in order to get sex. I actually have the most respect for bios that read, “If I’m being honest, just looking to hook up.” Bravo. Kudos to you, dude. Because, I have had my own seasons of wanting more and wanting less. And, there is nothing wrong with either choice. There is nothing wrong with existing in either space. It’s the lack of honesty that burns me to my core. Stop flirting with me if it’s not going anywhere. Stop wasting my time. I don’t need more friends off of Bumble, or sliding into my DMs, or through obscure means of getting my phone number. Truly. I’ve reached my lifetime quota after 34 years.

In tandem, what I have observed in the last eighteen months about myself is that I am, most certainly, a lover and believer of words. And, that is the crux. That online dating, or simply just dating, is this whole show of words. That are so easily believed. And it’s just all shit. If I had a dollar for every guy who suggested running away with me in my Airstream, I would have been able to pay straight cash for my new F-150 a few weeks ago. Seriously. There’s one in LA, and a couple in New Jersey, a handful in Texas, and so many in Colorado that I’ve actually stopped counting. Because the minute I say, “Okay, I’m calling you on this statement,” my experience indicates that they can’t live up to it.

Great, tell me all about your fantasies, homeboy, only to ghost two days later (or, better yet, I find out about your undying love for your current girlfriend on your second to last Instagram post from five days ago). Newsflash, smoother operator, this is my actual life over here. Hope you enjoyed your glimpse.

So, yes, I’m attempting to not grow cynical. I’m also attempting to unpack two very real personal questions. One, if a game must be played in order to win the affection of another, and that game requires me to act outside of my normal state, then am I even winning if I do “win?” For example, guy articulates that he doesn’t know if he wants anything. Then, the same guy asks for me to bring him food because he’s stuck at work. I show love through service, so naturally, my being is dying to deliver said food. But, guy advice (based on my current inner circle) is usually, don’t bring him the food: “He’s using you. If he can’t say that he wants you, but is willing to get favors from you, show him that you don’t have time to do him favors without him giving you a respectable level of commitment.” And, this is fair. This actually makes sense. But, still, I deliver the food (yep, that’s me) because, yep, that IS me. And, I don’t want to be anything but myself. Ever.

Two, what is my responsibility to give people space to be honest and themselves but also to guard my own heart in that process? I believe in ease. I believe that there are certain things in life that mysteriously and beautifully fall into place. I’d like to believe that a romantic relationship would unfold in a similar fashion. But, if this guy says he doesn’t know and then proceeds to engage with me in a fashion that suggests otherwise, should I believe his actions or his words? And, the fact that I’m asking that question is my answer, right? If the right person were standing in front of me, I’m confident I wouldn’t have to be choosing between his actions and his words in the first place because there would be an alignment in both areas that carries the level of integrity that I demand for in my own self. Yet, here I am, FaceTiming my best male friend at 7:32pm on a Wednesday night to ask how to respond to the 47th text message from a guy who just doesn’t know what it is that he wants from me, making me perplexed on how to proceed with my own verbiage and actions.

At this point, let’s add the nomadic element to the mix. And, I am quite confident that therein lies a bigger piece to this commitment-phobic puzzle. Because, it is easy to fall into a routine with someone who resides within your city limits and has a similar schedule to your scripted life. It is an entirely different thing to choose a person who has the freedom to leave. To ask someone to stay requires a deeper level of commitment. It means that someone is choosing for me to do life alongside him, and it means that we are taking off into the sunset together or I am abandoning the road to call someone my home. Ultimately, that choice is my desire. Because, the more I embark on adventures alone, the narrower the gap becomes for me to experience those things for the first time with someone else.

And, I’m starting to question whether or not anything is actually beautiful without it being shared, without it being seen through two sets of eyes in the same moment, if anything is real without the conversation of that thing existing between two coherent bodies.

So, I continue to sit and manifest these desires in the belief that, one day, I’ll be done with the exhibits. That, one day, someone will choose me, and I will choose him back. Without force. Without fear. Without the twenty questions. Granted, maybe I’ve already missed out on Mr. Perfect somewhere in between. Because I didn’t like his shoes. Or his haircut was weird. Or, I swiped left because he failed to include a bio (c’mon, guys). Regardless, I know that wanting something requires attention to that thing. I know that wanting someone requires intentionality to his existence. So, I’m here. Showing up. Attempting to live outside of our digital dead zone. Attempting to keep doing the work to have that one thing that my heart yearns to explore. I can reason that if it were easy, then everyone would do it. Like, really do it. It’s not easy. Not everyone does it. Like, really does it. But, it will damn well be worth it.

Meanwhile, if you need help with your pickup lines, don’t hesitate to slide into my DMs. They’re currently still free for the taking.

from Blog https://ondenver.com/the-silver-lining-online-dating-on-the-road/

[news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog]

How will the Measure app affect dick pics? An investigation.

What, did you not think people were going to use the iPhone's new Measure app to measure their dicks?

The new feature, which debuted with iOS 12 on Monday, allows users to measure items on-screen in real time. This means that it's easier than ever to determine the exact length of your pet, but it also means there could be a few changes to how people sext in the future.

Dick pic senders can now include an exact measurement (literally, it's a ruler superimposed into the image) with their photos. If they're proud of their penis size (masculinity is a real trip), it's likely they'll go the Measure app route — it's a concrete way to convey size without using other items for scale.

The iPhone update’s Measure app begins the Renaissance era of dick pics #iOS12 pic.twitter.com/u4BmvZhGh6

— Bob Clarke (@bobwclarke) September 17, 2018

But for the dick pic taker who depends on context, the Measure app could complicate things. People who remove all other objects from a dick pic to avoid scale analysis — if there's also a hand in the photo, for example, it's easier to tell how long the primary subject actually is — are now vulnerable. Should it seem like the sender has sneakily removed context clues, the recipient can simply ask for a follow-up photo from the Measure app. If the sender obliges, any prior exaggerations will be revealed. If the sender declines, the reason is clear: the dick was not that big to begin with. The sender is caught in a lie.

SEE ALSO: A survival guide to dick pics (both solicited and unsolicited)

Now that iOS 12 is out I will only accept dick pics in the form of a measure app screenshot

— 🥕 (@F466OT) September 18, 2018

Additionally, the Measure app will probably make dick pics — most of which are already ugly — even uglier. The genre is not exactly famous for its devotion to aesthetics, and it's likely that senders will interpret the Measure app as an excuse to ignore lighting and composition even more than they already do. After all, who cares about what it looks like as long as it's longer than average? (The answer: most people.)

Perhaps the best course of action, then, is to think of the Measure app as a resource for your sexts, not a whole new frontier — not that that's stopping anyone on Twitter.

can’t wait to measure my dick with this new measuring app 😀 #Apple

— yea (@dcikyy) September 17, 2018

Wow the new measure app on #iOS12 is so inaccurate. It keeps telling me that something that is clearly 7 inches is really only 3.5 inches

— Michael (@mikedepetris) September 17, 2018

how many men do you think have already taken and sent out dick pics with the ios measure app

— stephanie (@ladyyfett) September 18, 2018

I wonder how many penis pics the FBI agents assigned to the measure app have already collected

— you (@_kappxx) September 18, 2018

ladies from now on we asking for dick pics taken with the measure app

— 🦋 (@stexph) September 19, 2018

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#_uuid:c57a8c55-7916-3d95-9e8d-17ccfc0e3640 #_category:yct:001000002 #_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL #_author:Chloe Bryan #_revsp:news.mashable