To be honest, I feel we need to just stop everything so we can have a conversation about how 90% of the biggest, baddest pirates in the world of One Piece either refuse to or are unable to dress themselves in anything half decent.
[I mean.... What]
And it somehow gets worse the more powerful and infamous they are. I mean, like, when we meet Shanks he's is dressed, more or less, like your stereotypical pirate:
[You know, all the pirate basics: open white shirt, red sash, brown pants, open tied flip flops, Strawhat.... Well, I did say more of less.]
I mean, he doesn't actually do much at this point. He's a lovable rapscallion uncle who ruffles Luffy's hair before sailing out towards the sunset and the literal future.
At which point....
He decides that the pirate look isn't "cool" enough, and what he really needs to complete his style is a pair of Bermuda shorts you would hide from your father. He has gone all pirate up top, but slow the waist? It's all Florida cousin who's been crashing on your couch for the last six years.
But, hey, Shanks can't ways be in Yonko mode. Maybe he's like trying out some new styles. I mean, not that new, all he did is get a pair of patterned pants (and yet they are so much worse...) It's better than say ....
I know what you're thinking. "Haha, I get it. The joke is that Benn Beckman clearly only owns the one outfit."
But no, that is clearly not the case.
One pair of boots? Yeah, seems so (they may not look it here but in the same art style, they are very much the same boots). Same sash? There is every chance. But there is no way in HELL that is the same outfit.
I mean, Benn's muscle mass like doubles in this time frame, but his short has somehow gotten baggier? No, that is not how it works. And you know that feeling of trying on jeans from high school, and they barely go over one thigh? Benn Baby-Got-Back (And Arms, And Chest) Does.
So this man, one of the most feared pirates to sail the seas, who's wanted poster reads DEAD ONLY goes out every couple of years, and finds an EXACT REPLICA of his clothes from over a decade ago. And who knows how long he's been doing this? And in a that time the only change he's made is adding what is definitely either the cape of a man he killed OR the rug of a very fashionable but not super expensive hotel. It's a 50/50 toss up to which of those is true.
Hell, he's not even replacing the sash. Notice it use to wrap around him with some to spare but not anymore. Who knew men bulked up so much going into their 50s?
Look, nothing about this makes sense and yet there must be a reason. Is this some kind of emotional thing? Is Benn especially picky about fabrics and the way clothes feel? Did he just really like how he looked in his first Wanted Poster and thought, "I'm doing that. Forever." Like.... What....
But.... But what about those cool outfits they always dress the cast in? You know, the ones where even Shanks gets to look fly.
I mean, check out little demon Luffy! And Law, you should just buy that coat. Actually, don't buy it. You're a pirate. Steal that jacket and claim it as your own, it's amazing. Ace I like that you've stayed true to your refusal to own a shirt, no notes. Shanks.... Not really sure what you're dressed as? A guy who went through his rival friend old enemy bestie through MIHAWK'S closet, maybe? It didn't even matter, it's still a huge improvement.
Even Doffy is dressed up (and of course looks fabulous) and Corazon is so magical! And...
Okay, that might just be Perona and Mihawk's day clothes, it's hard to tell. But you know what, they still rock them, and I'll bet they've dressed the third member of their little house hold up in-
... damnit Zoro, what even is this? (Do love your trick or treat bag though. You keep protecting those booze.)
So everyone gets in on the act. Like, I don't know how "Canon"y you would consider these, but clearly it's a party everyone is invited to and even Zoro put on a top hat! So Benn must....
Same. Goddamn. Outfit.
For all we know this is his Halloween version. Maybe he has like fifty of these stashed in the ship. They are cards! For Halloween! AND HE IS STILL IN THE SAME DAMN OUTFIT!
Hang on Apple has made tumblr ban suicide prevention, but not suicide? Girl, but not boy? Twunk, but not twink? Dubcon, but not dashcon?
You know, when Obi-Wan came to Kamino to question Jango, it really didn’t help his case that the apartment was so pristine and Boba was so well-behaved. If Jango played up the frantic-single-dad angle, he might have gotten away with it.
Imagine if Obi-Wan walked into a messy apartment with kid stuff scattered everywhere, Boba running around like a little gremlin, and Jango going “Whatever you got to say, Jedi, make it quick. If I don’t get Boba to complete his education modules, he’s going to fall behind, and you know how kids are. If I’m not on top of him every second, it’s not going to get done.” He might have been like, “Shit, never mind. This guy doesn’t have time to attempt political assassinations. Hey, I feel you, bro. I’ve raised a feral child myself. Good luck if he ever gets behind the wheel of a speeder.”