#its in my contract

[kyistell]

The last of my NJ headcanons. Now let it be known that there will probably be more in the future, considering he is my favorite, HOWEVER this is all I have for now lol.

New Jersey-

Normally is presenting more as Central Jersey, his tics are from North and South trying to speak at the same time

Because of slightly demonic magic, Jersey is fractured like how his state is, there’s North, South, and Central, they can all split into their own persons with North looking the same, but not for too long

While Jersey has used many names during his life, the one his mothers gave him is the only few actually know, Jonah Eriksson Bakker, Eriksson being his Mother’s last name and Bakker his Ma’s

Despite it being hundreds of years, he still isn’t used to English, words never come out quite right, there’s almost always something just slightly missed pronounced even when taking his accent into account

If he’s upset or tired he has a pretty heavy lisp, which along with his already heavy accent when feeling any emotion makes him pretty impossible to understand, the only ones that do are York, Del, and surprisingly Penn

Likes to call New York ‘Yorkie’ Vermont ‘Monty’ Kentucky ‘Ken’ (he’s the only one allowed too) California ‘Westie’ Florida ‘Dia’ ‘Sunshine’ or ‘Flo Rida’ and says Texas like how a Russian would (he has no idea why he started to he just did one day)

The Jersey Devil is real, Jerseys met it multiple times in his life, sometimes they exist in the same space in the Pine Barrens, but most times they don’t

Jersey has a Jersey Devil plush, had it since he was a young child, it’s his prized possession along with one of Connie’s books from the 1850s that he ‘borrowed’ 

When he was younger, Jersey would go to Devil’s Tree to read, it's how he learn the hard way, that his not father father is not the only demon that resides in NJ

In contrast to York, Jersey LOVES drop towers, thinks that they are the second best theme park flat ride to ever exist (the first are those super scramblers that flip while spinning)

Threw his shoe at York so much that Penn ended up buying him sandals as a joke, a joke that Jersey didn’t understand until YEARS later, he still loves and uses those sandals, his aim is unmatched when it comes to hitting York

Would get hit by Yorkie every time he said the R word (which he still doesn't fully believe is a slur but whatever Yorkie), this was specifically during the 2000s

Has brought every State to Action Park at least once when it was still open, it’s best not to question how he convinced Alaska and Hawaii or literally any other State, it’s just best not too

Jersey has a little devil that could in theory be related to the Jersey Devil, it's name is Impy

#welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #wttt #wttt new jersey #wttsh new jersey #wttt headcanons #the last one i actually added on here and then added to google doc #listen okay #i wanted him to have a lil devil #but like obvi theres JD #but he and JD have a rocky relationship #so theres no way that would work #and since his father is literally the devil from the bible #i thought “hey why not give him a lil demon” #so here we are #also is it clear enough how much i love Jersey #like its a lot lolz #but of course i have too #i live here #its in my contract

[spriggan675]

Calamity of Blorbotropolis

There's your title, roll with it

Okay so this would have to be a modern AU where it's like a Fifty Shades of Grey situation but without all the emotional manipulation and abuse.

Blorbo is obviously running the city like a crime boss or something, and Main Character is a plucky start-up investigator whose about to start up some trouble.

MC has to get kidnapped by our Crime Boss Blorbo and that's how they meet. Blorbo is holding them hostage while MC is like "wow you do all this yourself? That's pretty cool ngl" and our Blorbo is like "wow thanks I put a lot of work into this"

and so hence they keep meeting up together "by accident" and get to know each other and also fuck a lot.

Eventually, they fall in love and this causes Problems for some reason. Then there's ANOTHER big crime boss in the city that they have to run from or kill or something idk I'm only in this for the porn really

then our MC and Blorbo run away together and have a happy ending!

Just kidding they both die

#I'm not allowed to write happy endings #its in my contract #but here you go #a story ill never write #enjoy

[alibonbonn]

Guy who went to Baldur’s Gate law school and passed the Baldur’s Gate bar exam some time long ago

#its all very tedious I BET #did he chug speed potions to pull all-nighters #ALSO shouldn’t he know not to make deals with the devil without a lawyer present #evidently baldurs gates legal system is in shambles #yelling about how apparently origin astarion can offer to look over wyll’s contract omg #anyways this is for my lawyer friends idk how u guys do this #bg3 #baldur’s gate iii #astarion #baldurs gate 3 #astarion ancunin #alibonbonn #ali draws

[amphibianaday]

day 1609

#amphibian #frog #frogsona #amphibidextrous #its so funny i started the project to have something to do after signing the contract but before starting my new job (~month long period) #but got distracted by other projects and only finished like 20% and then slowly did like. 1 seam a month #until last week when i went “i wanna wear it to a party i should finish it” #(didnt finish it in time for the party but by that time i had the momentum to finish it the day after)

[westywallowing]

sketches for my fruits basket au while I figure the fuckity out of my tablet pen :)

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous fanart #mlb fanart #mlb #adrien agreste #chat noir #cat noir #mlb chat noir #mlb felix #argos #mlb argos #westy doodles #furuba au #SO what ive decided to go with IS #instead of the animals being from the zodiac like in the show i think its fairly obvious in this au its just the animals of the miraculous #my idea of it is something like a mix between fruits basket curse and miraculous holders #the holder meet the spirits of the animals (the kwamis) and make contracts with them in exchange for power #and one of the downsides is the animal curse essentially #so it does in fact change a lot considering the curse is a CHOICE however i still like the fact that it is indeed a curse #like yeah you get these cool powers but uh you literally can not physically interact with anyone you hold dear that is of the opposite sex:)

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

At rest, your lungs wish to deflate, and your ribcage expands outwards.

#better drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #yiling laozu #Happy Friday the 13th! #This is scientific fact btw! #Ventilation operates through a series of active and passive forces #The active forces being muscular contraction with inhalation and exhalation having their own set of muscles. #but the interesting part is the passive forces at work: #The lungs have a certain level of elasticity to them - meaning the more they expand the more the those elastic forces are functioning- #-to try and return the system to rest (exhalation passive forces). Your diaphragm is the main force - pushing against the lungs at rest. #Your ribcage on the other hand is under a state of being pulled outwards. It *wants* to be as open as possible. #These to contradicting forces create a constant push and pull which assists in the ebb and flow of air. Most significantly with exhalation. #Now that being said - the primary action of inhalation ventilation is through control centers in your brainstem. #If you lose connection to that due to trauma you're going to need ventilation assistance. #Small note: Respiration is the cellular event of chemical exchange in the alveoli. Ventilation is airflow and pressure. #They are both important but also very different things. Sadly used interchangeably. #My anatomy nerd brain is screaming over the inaccurate ribcage...but its...recognizable. I will get it right one day. #Okay nerd rant over (I cut out a lot of stuff about pressure gradients. They are cool. To me.) #This is a redraw of an mspaint doodle I made back in april. I yearn to make the Yiling Laozu eerie as he deserves #Tear that bitch (affectionate) apart! #Been playing around with hatching for a while and its amazing how many styles there are! Not sure I'll stick with this one (but it was fun)

[suntails]

⚔️🐙

#9!! silver RUN!!! hes trying to convince him to sign to switch dorms. can u imagine the leverage he'd have to try and get closer to malleus #like 'wooowww crazy! one of ur guards just so HAPPENS to be in my dorm! hes fantastic. if u ever need anything id be MORE than happy to hel #i think its funny!! iirc theres a dj with silver in octavinelle its a silly concept. that boy doesnt belong there #hes generous (real) not generous (octavinelle) #i think silver would be susceptible to signing a contract w azul. but i dont think itd be a Bad contract bc azul knows mal would murder him #twst #twisted wonderland #twst silver #azul ashengrotto #suntails

[wannabemylover]

rewatching the first episode of Hannibal and holy shit I forgot how good this is but it's actually insane that Brian fuller set up the ep like this, he introduces will and Hannibal by first briefly showing them at their core, at the darkest, most vile part of them---we get a glimpse behind the curtain---and then its gone, the curtain is snapped shut and we see their masks, their human suits.

Will empathizes with killers because he likes it, and he wants to kill but he refuses to give into the urge because he knows how much he'll like it and he won't be able to stop. So he lives vicariously through other killers, satisfying his own dark urge by feeding it little morsels of secondhand blood lust. Every crime scene he works gives the urge something that satisfies it, not enough for it to grow, but enough for it be sate. Enough that he can ignore it for long enough that he can walk around and be Professor Will Graham who is Weird, Brash, and Non-sociable.

And Hannibal is a cannibal at night and a psychiatrist by morning.

#hannibal #hannigram #hanniblogging #hannigram brainrot is real #also ive watched the entirety of hannibal like four times and everytime i watch it i still find stuff to lose my mind over #brian fuller the brain that you have #winston my beloved #also plzzzz the way hannibal was just gonna kill jack with like no hesitation #AND the way hannibal was fucking smitten from the moment he spoke to will #like wills all like i hate eye contract its distracting as hell and hannibal is just looking at him like 😍😍😍 #plss you are embarrassing yourself #also question #when will was like how do you see me and hannibal said that shit about the mongoose and the snakes and will just looks at him like ???? #do yall think he was confused because he was genuinely like dude what the actual fuck are you saying #or because he understood it #and the woman at hobbs' work being like two guys from the fbi #and neither of them are technically from the fbi #just two insane dudes having a first date by larping an active fbi investigation #omg and when will shoots hobbs he realizes that oh fuck this is my chance this is my chance to kill and finally satisfy that dark urge #so after he shoots him once he just keeps shooting shooting shooting till its impossible for hobbs to survive for hobbs to be dead #till it was will that killed him

[3-aem]

im bored of animal crossing will be drawing gj again will be mental illness-ing once more.

#women make less than men because we dont know how to ask for more!!!!! #and thats so fucking true my ex manager had to coach me how to ask for more #and then i entered the call and went oh u want to give me less than what i asked for great okay sure love you bye #!!!!!!!!! *looking at myself in the mirror* i hate u #the noise my cat makes when hes frustrated #or really really excited i cant tell which is which anymore #my ex manager is also like lawyer core #ie not a lawyer but loves reading contracts for some uknown reason #and he was pointing out all the stupid phrasing #and i was sitting there like sir to be completely candid i do not even comprehend what the line is saying #let alone what it is suggesting and its implications #apparently when you get those emails like this is confidential dont share it!!! #u can u can like totally share it its not enforceable #the sender even knows its not enforceable they just put it there anyway #what are you gonna do with that info heck if i know!

[greatalastoraltruist]

So we know Alastor and Lilith disappeared at the same time 7 years ago. And we know that Lucifer had a meeting with Heaven which began the exterminations. We don't know when that happened though. Either they're not mentioning when the exterminations started because they've always happened or because revealing when they started would give too much away and make it too easy to guess things. All Charlie knows is that Lucifer went to the meeting and she assumes he gave the go ahead for exterminations. But the exterminations haven't always happened. They only started after the angels, or specifically Sera I think considering no other angels knew about it, became afraid of the power and influence Lilith had over the demons.

My current theory is that that meeting was called between Sera, Adam, and Lucifer because Alastor and Lilith were planning on working together with him broadcasting her voice on his radio station to inspire the other demons to rise to war against the angels. I think Sera demanded that Lilith and Alastor be separated with Lilith making a deal with Adam to stay in heaven where she can't empower any other demons with her voice or even contact anyone in hell and that Sera demanded the exterminations happen as well in order to not only lessen the demons' power but also instill fear in them in an attempt to prevent future uprisings. I think Alastor was given the options of either be killed or sign a contract limiting his power and requiring him to stay away for a while so that their little idea of rebellion is forgotten amongst the masses. I especially think that because of Zestial's comment about folks thinking Alastor had fallen to holy arms. Maybe Sera is his contract holder. That or they tried to straight up kill him and he somehow escaped barely alive and it's taken this long for him to heal and regain enough power for him to feel comfortable revealing himself to society. But trying to kill him wouldn't explain the contact or his need to 'unclip his wings'.

#idk this is my current theory #i could end up being wrong but i feel like thats the direction all the foreshadowing is pointing towards #its way too much a coincidence for lilith and Alastor to have been gone the same amount of time esp with her in heaven after trying to #incite an uprising #considering Lilith has no wings it seems like the obv answer is Sera is his contract holder #and i see no reason for her to have ever met let alone make a contract with a demon outside of trying to stop a rebellion #one thing i don't understand tho is why didnt Sera and Adam just kill them? why are they still allowed to live? unless Lilith is somehow #unkillable but then still why didnt they just kill Alastor? #there has to be another factor im missing #ughhhhhhhhh who knows how many more years itll be before the next season #at least theyre already recording lines for it but its the animation thats gonna kill us #as much as i wish the next season was comin next year i doubt it and i def dont want any animators to be put through anymore crunch time #broadcasting across hell #alastor theory #hazbin hotel #lilith hazbin hotel #adam hazbin hotel #lucifer hazbin hotel #sera hazbin hotel #alastor hazbin hotel #lilth theory #radio demon #hazbin theory

[ahhrenata]

little late night warm up sketches

#im almost done with my third playthrough lol #its still just as good as the first time #and im still trying to get Leon’s face down 😓 #i want to make some stickers of them to put on my case #adding it to the list of things to do when I’m done with this work contract #serennedy #luis serra #leon kennedy #resident evil 4 #resident evil 4 remake #misc fanart #resident evil fanart

[silverskye13]

What's water like in your hels? Is there any there? Is it there in limited quantities? Does it rain at all? Is there only water in specific places? Was it brought from the overworld? I'm curious

There is water in hels! Just barely! It was one of Evil X's gifts to the server, getting it there. I imagine the city has a cistern he artificially filled, which is where the water from the fountains in the city and the tap water comes from. Hels is very much like the nether though! So to raise the boiling/evaporation point of the water so it stays liquid where it's supposed to be, the water is acidic. It's not eat-your-skin acidic, but its corrosive enough that using it to, say, polish armor, will lead to breakdown over time. Metals and stones they anticipate coming into a lot of contact with water [fountains, pipes] probably need regular maintenance and water proofing.

It doesn't rain in hels, all water there was brought there artificially, but I do imagine they have some weather phenomena. The peripheral of the city has a small geyser problem [any time water leaks from the cistern and comes in contact with the hotter stone around the city, you get a geyser.] There is still a cycle of hotter/cooler air, so they do get wind, and that wind will bring dust clouds and gas clouds from surrounding lava lakes and things. They get a lot of fog and fog-adjacent weather patterns, and a haze of clouds is often passing through. I also imagine they get "snows" of ash from eruptions around basalt deltas, and there are probably times of year where the different shroom plants release their spores, causing colored snows of red and blue. [We have cottonwood plants around here in the summer that coat the roads in a false snow, especially around the river where I live. I imagine whenever the warped / crimson fungus lets out spores, it would look a bit like that].

#lindentree #rns asks #if you're wondering why the hels i had an answer for this #its because i realized really early on that I said there was a water fountain in hels #and had a small panic when i realized up until this point i had said 'they live in the nether basically' #and had to justify water in hels #so i went on a research spree on how to raise the boiling point of water #and the answers are either dump a lot of salt into it #or make it acidic #drinking water in hels is probably unpleasant -- its probably naturally bitter #its not eat-your-skin acidic #but if everything had the acidity of pineapples i think..... #anyway the wear and tear on the city structures would be insane #i ate through the steering wheel of my car because my hands were slightly more acidic after oil painting #and that was a class i only took for like... 8 weeks #could you imagine acidic water all the time? #there's a plumber/contracter making bank in hels

[chryblossomjjk]

imagine seokjin comes back and is serious

#like hes the most unserious person we know PLSSSSS #catching up with them is going to be the coolest thing ever like #have they changed? #what do they want in their future? #what type of music do the want to create? #and like their contract was updated to give THEM control over decisions basically (from my peanut brain comprehension) #so like #imagine the fucking music we're gonna get like #its going to be a nice creative break for them too like #ugh ugh ugh #I GO UGH!! UGH!!! UGH!! #LMAO SORRY YALL I GOT SIDETRACKED #anywho #so excited for the future #love them #seokjin come back to me soon

[bitchfitch]

I have the general rule that I just, don't let myself give a shit about other people's dumbass opinions but I have one pet peeve that I just. Can Not let go of. and it's posts that go

How to write [Minority Group]!

Step 1: Make sure all your characters are exactly like me the op, or are exactly what I like to see in media.

Aside: Anything else is impossible, unrealistic, bigoted and you'll go to hell forever.

Step 2: They also have to use the exact language I do to describe themselves btw, no matter the time period or setting. See the above aside for further explanation.

Step 3: you should never ever even think about the actual mechanics of what makes a trope problematic in its impact in the real world. J ust memorize this list of things that should be banned in all fiction (for being problematic because I don't like them/someone else I agree with said they should be banned)

Step 4: Nuances in identity don't exist <3

#this is specifically about the number of how to write acearos posts that dont recognize people can have motives outside their orientation. #or that demiromantics/demisexuals exist #They are also always Really particular about how its unrealistic for aro characters to be anything other than disgusted by romance #Hi im an ace aro who fucks often and adores romance #as like a genre and form of social performance #I like sex because I like attention thats socially simple and doesn't require the upkeep of a relationship #I like romance because im a human person who doesn't think every story has to be about me to be interesting. #I like new experiences and seeing the world from other perspectives i like the pagentry of dates andnthe aesthetics of love. #Whether im loveless or not is an ongoing question because my ability to process my own emotions is zilch. #Maybe im incapable of love (the chemialcal reaction) but still chose to love (the social contract) #its not unrealistic for people tobe different from you #it just Frustrates me to no end when folk try to define anyone who shares their lable but arnt like them out of existence.

[twashchan]

if u get a boner while spooning, u are legally obligated to grind on me jsyk

#txt #its in my contract.

[pissmd]

this barbie is a gucci girl

#my art #house md #hmd #eric foreman #omar epps #he contracted pretty diseases. its terminal.