#its not even a vent i just find it funny

[henryzin]

Just to break out of the hbomber chain of reblogs I'm making here (I wasted my entire day watching his video and the Tommy Tallarico one) I'm showing this quick doodle I did in the morning before getting sucked into the rabbit hole

Ahhh such simpler times....

#just another pist about how my life suck wow i shoulf stop tgat #its not even a vent i just find it funny #its funny i have contracting behavior that will make me feel physically sick #chronic pain #i guess...? #adhd #yeah that guy too! #ughh this is getting too long bye

[kinos-fortress-2]

idk comfort characters moment ig

#i should REALLY stop doodling around and start doing more serious art #anyways this is not shipp art btw i dont shipp them for me they are like brothers best friends even #demoman #miss pauling #tf2 #team fortress 2 #kino art #idk i just feel like drawing sad demo i think he got too much going on in that little head full of beer and depression... #and well he just needs a hug and venting for real and not making it much of a joke #IDK I WAS JUST LISTENING TO MITSKI AND LAMP AND BOOM sad doodle i guess #i think for demo is a bit hard to find a good time to vent and well his team kinda sucks for that #same goes w miss p this two are full of shit in their heads so why not listening w each other and crying idk #its been a time since i have draw demo... #those fucking hands... i hate often times drawing hands #idk why i made tf2 sad art i think is funny but who cares cringe is free look at me doing lovey dovey and sad art haha laugh at this guy

[skull-ishcloud]

I find it just hilarious how my mother will go all like "how can parents of disabled people not care to understand other disabled people". While she has a child with ADHD who she payed to get formally diagnosed (by that I mean she knows), and never ever bothered to search the symptoms.

#i mean she didn't even know poor time management was a thing #but its even in the shittiest symptom list #she probably thinks I have ADD lol #actually adhd #adhd #disabilities #ableism #tw ableism #i say hilarious cause how else would I react #i feel like there are other ways #like when something bad happens I just crack up laughing #ppl look at me and think im crazy #at the end I don't even cry #I for some reason genuinely find it all funny #I had a math test these days and at the end half of class was crying. I was laughing my ass off. #they probably thought I was either mean (and smart af) or really crazy #venting

[puppyparkmoving]

Can i be honest with u guys im abt to regress back to only being able to eat mickey shaped foods/round foods i can make mickey shaped

#squeaks #literally its not even that bad of a thing i just get rlly fucked up with my autism and I find comfort in it #so this is not a vent just a funny thought

[widevibratobitch]

.

#havent really been active on tumblr the last few days but now i came back to post another vent and fuck off again lol hiiiiii #i havent cried in way too long. ngl sobbing hysterically in your bed does hit different lol #anyway. what a great time to remind myself of every single bad thing anyone has ever said about my body and my face <3 #anyway i finished the sobbing till i cant breathe session and now my one eye hurts like there's sth stuck in it but there's nothing #but while i was digging in it trying to find sth under my eyelid that could explain the pain i really really looked at it #my friend once said my eyes are the colour of a swamp and by god she was right. #and like damn. i was never insecure about my eyes but maybe i should add that to the list. #but like whatever. like obv im not gonna start being actually insecure about mu stupid eyes but it did hit me that there is really #not a single thing about my body that i can with all confidence say is nice/pretty/whatever. not a single thing that i genuinely like. #like at best case it's 'not as bad as it could be'. like i have nothing lol. cant even honestly say something as silly as 'i like my eyes' #cause no. they look like a swamp. #idk im just so tired of trying my best all the time and still looking like a rotting leaking bag of garbage. #i try to remind myself that i dress funny and do fun make up and that is what people will notice about me but the truth is #everyone will still always see that under all that bs im just plain ugly and just generally unattractive #and ill never be able to distract anyone from that not really #like ik people who like me dont care about that but thats the thing. #im just tired of being one of the people that will always be liked/loved/whatever 'despite' sth. #like there is nothing of value in me that is NATURAL. its all fucking fake. #anyway. wish i were dead same old same old.

[fairyreblogs]

man i dont know why (i have theories but hold on) but the fandoms Ive been in on the internet have been a little meaner these last few years. like i dont get nice comments on my fics anymore. i get ones with no reading comprehension or i get angry ones or i get ones that are enthusiastic and delighted but instead of any decorum they are like. aggressive in their delight. usually just a demand for more content. something has definitely changed in how people in fandoms interact with one another. my theories are just like. younger generations more comfortable with the internet not being as polite as older people on the internet are combined with quarantine kinda ruining a lot of peoples ability to interact socially (mine was ruined too to be fair). but like lately ive been in search of a fandom thats not the markiplier fandom that is nice to me and not aggressively-enthusiastic-weird (but i might take this too) and its kinda hard to find one. i dont know if i just dont have interests that align with happy communities, or what.

#markiplier fandom nice to me forever and ever. #sometimes they get me on edge when they demand i update and dont even say like 'nice fic i liked this' they just say 'update' #but thats literally like the meanest fan ive met so 👍 #fnaf fandom is interesting. you definitely gotta treat them the way you want to be treated or theyre not gonna be nice #unfortunately this means you cant joke too much with them. #uh. moment of truth. percy jackson fandom kinda mean. ok they are mean. no kinda. also no reading comprehension #definitely a fandom that bonds by choosing something to nitpick and hate together. which sucks if you liked that thing they chosen that wee #my little corner of the xmen fandom has actually gotten nicer as time goes on. but also more obsessed with details and accuracy #but my corner of the xmen fandom was still nice enough that i adore them even if i havent been in it in ages #marvel is very so-so depending on where you are in the fandom but its such a large fanbase it is what it is. normal #witcher fandom from my experience has been pretty chill but i havent done much as a content creator for them to really know #d:be human is. decent. unfortunately a lot of outside hate there that it kinda outweighs how polite the fans are #star wars.... well. if you find your niche good for you! nice people. but if you get too generalized with your niche. rip #sw fandom when you study mando'a or dai bendu: hai X3 !! #sw fandom when you get too generalized and talk 'prequel vs sequel': die #vent #this is funny because i was really nice about this sw comment. but its generalized. which means someone will tell me to die. #why do i know this? because ive made this comment about the sw fandom before. =_=

[sgkjd]

i have this starvation To Belong and recently it keeps peaking and peaking i didn't know it could become this strong. i'm afraid to live and experience what actual peak of this starvation will look like. it's all i can think about, can't focus on any work, keep impulsively watching youtube and tiktok just to see people similar to me at least on my screen, keep watching series and live through them to feel like i'm Part of Something... i just need someone to See Me for who i am so bad it's so scary how this feeling makes me rely on anyone who just looks at me like i exist.

#its funny bc before i used to blame myself for not being open and vulnerable enough #but now even if i speak clearly about my needs people just dont seem to comprehend what i mean #like how difficult can it be i dont understand #anyways so im really trying to find an irl community where i could belong #but in this day and age is that even possible #there's a fb group of autistic ppl from my country and they organize meetings once in a while but it's in another city lmao #like a good 4 hour train ride away #u_u #i literally dont know how to go about finding community #and it's not like such info is written out in some book or manual #; words generated by me #vent cw

[salsflore]

ummmm

#oh mika there is beauty in life~ look at your future! everything will be worth it in the end~ #my favorite image on this device btw ^ #cw negative #cw vent #you know where this is going. apologies my mind is a mess and i really just need to get it out because i find its better than- #-writing a semi formal email to that One (1) emotional support organization and i’m afraid to make a call so #but i just genuinely believe things would be better off if i weren’t alive. a bit of a silly thing to jump to i know but #my tuition fees aren't cheap and i'm not even that great of a student or a daughter or a sister and i- #-have no talents or remarkable feats. i’m not impressive in any way. and i hate hearing shit about how ^_^ its okay! we all have something- #-special about ourselves! for example maybe you have really good hand writing and thats good enough ~ but that doesn't work for me because- #-i have nothing. my handwriting isn't good my singing isn't good i'm not artistically gifted i don't have some random affinity for puzzles- #-i'm not charming or somehow really good at calculation or super creative or a really comforting friend i really have nothing at all #i don’t want to die. i have no plans on doing that sort of thing anytime soon— don’t misunderstand me #i just wholeheartedly believe i don’t deserve to be here anymore not because i’m not loved. i just can’t stand myself and my teenage years- #-feel so long and i'm so fragile how much longer do i have to tolerate. i'm contributing nothing. why should my family have to feed and- #-clothe a burden like me who provides nothing. why should my friends care for someone like me. i’m not really that funny or sweet or great- #-with advice giving or pretty or helpful in any way. why is it that life is genuinely easier for others. what did i do? what can i do? #how much longer must i tolerate this? would you believe me if i said i really did try to change my mindset this time? #i have no one in real life to talk to. therapists are pricey and i don’t think mine was helping me in any way anyways. she was nice though #so every night i sleep hoping i wake up somewhere else. somewhere where i'm happier and i can live all my silly fantasies where i'm a fun- #-and lovely person who has everything she wants and nothing goes wrong ever!! #how much longer must i hang onto the little things. i’m in such an exruciating amount of pain that i want to kill myself without dying? lol #everyone repeats the same stuff. get bit #i can't rely on the joy of having coffee every morning or persevere for the sake of seeing cute cats on insta. nothing will ease the burden

[toastsnaffler]

i keep getting irrationally miffed at ppl 😐😐

#'impressed by how much u can talk abt this considering youve not played either game' #fuck off. as if im not just trying to show interest bc u + another friend are both into them + constantly talk abt them in our gc!! #i mean since u guys talk abt them all the time + theyre huge on tumblr like. it would be hard for me to not know anything abt them at all #literally what else can i talk to u guys abt anyway. i dont think there are any interests i personally have that they both gaf abt #if anything they actively dislike most of the things im hyperfixated on. or at least she does so like i cant bring that up can i. #all i did was share a post i saw on tumblr that i thought was funny. its not like i had some negative/controversial opinion #i just saw it and thought hey that makes me think of my friends bc they like those things maybe theyll find it funny too!! #dog sitting outside the door with rly big sad eyes offering them a stick i found in a puddle #i like listening to them talk and i will eventually play some of the games theyre into myself cuz they make them sound rly cool #and even if theyre not my kind of thing i like sharing interests with other ppl and sometimes thats enough for me to be able to enjoy it #i literally own some of them already but im just not in the mental space to start smth new right now. which i have SAID!!!! #why do u even care girl. as if u dont already have a ton of friends playing it that ur talking to abt it???? i wont have anything to add #and thats not gonna stop u from being able to talk to me abt it anyway????? like 2/3 of our conversations atm are abt bg3 #man. i know its not that deep but it makes me kinda sad for some reason. im just trying. i guess next time ill just let u guys talk- #to each other or at me and not comment or say anything so u can pretend im not here or whatever it is u want #ughh. she probably didnt even mean it like that and ill feel stupid for getting annoyed and delete this later but whatever. #might work out early today and then i can like draw or play a game or smth the rest of the day. alright lets go #.vent #listening to my silly little jfunk/jazz/soul playlist and i already feel over it. healing

[fleshdyke]

absnskaisgbsj

#lost literally one of the best friendships of my life yesterday #i mean it’s been gone for a while i just never had the courage to talk to them about it until yesterday. and that basically confirmed it tbh #they didn’t say i did anything wrong but they also didn’t not say i did anything wrong and i’m v paranoid that i did do smth wrong #like i dont want to talk bad abt any of them bc genuinely i had so much fun with these people and im so glad i got to know them #like when i talked to them they were very dry ig? like not like their usual self at all even when talking to someone they dont know #definitely sounded like they were talking to someone they hated. im trying to tell myself taht its just my anxiety but ummm yeah idk i think #im actually right this time #idk. it just sucks man. im trying to think of what i did wrong bc i just dont know what happened #i think im overanalyzing every interaction i can remember having with these ppl bc i dont even want to entertain the idea that they might #have been bad people all along. i dont want to think that and i dont but idk it feels like an observation about myself that ive made from #the outside in yk. like half of me is feeling the emotional response and the other half is just watching from the outside like im someone #else. and i know this is a normal human thing but its just always weird yk #and then theres the whole awful thing of seeing shit that they would find funny or that reminds me of them. and i also dont know what im #supposed to do when school starts back up again bc we took a lot of the same classes and if i end up in a class with them idk if im supposed #to say hi or just pretend they dont exist or not and i dont want to make the wrong decision so they hate me even more yk #whatever man. it fucking sucks but life goes on. my dog is just chilling in my room rn and i’ll always have her and tia and my brother #rambles #vent

[fayeisuppose]

when the nurse at ugent care tries to guilt trip you and your father into doing something you clearly don't want to while your hyperventilating and crying having a panic attack

#kinda vent #ok so im sicky rn #i have strep throat right? well we went to the hospital because i felt like crap and we find out its strep throat- not a huge deal just a- #pain right before my birthday- so the doctor says i can either take antibiotics (a bunch of pills) for 10 days straight or get a shot #so i choose the shot option #and while i have a massive fear of needles- one little prick in my arm wont kill me #so i make a joke to the doctor after she says 10 straight days by taking my sweater of and pulling my sleeve up to reveal the muscle in my- #arm where they give the shot-she laughs and says im funny and says goodbye so the nurse could give me the shot #so i pull up my sleeve and shes like "oh no theres too much in this dosage so i have to do it in your thigh. it sounds kinda dumb but heres #where i start panicking- im hyperventilating- i tell her i dont want to do it (she didnt even have the shot in the room) and im crying my- #father is telling her that we'd rather just do the meds- and then she starts telling him that she already 'ordered' the shot?? and instead- #of asking me if im okay with it- only speaking to him and ignoring me. we got the meds instead of shot in the end but panic attacks as bad- #as that one leave me on edge for hours after #so i just wanna know aita?

[lady-caden]

I need 2 vent

#bruh this girl is SO annoying and god i just find her pathetic at this point #she acts like an edgy anime character and that everhthing is agaisnt her even when its her decisions that she chooses that fucks shit up #last year she obvi never liked me and made it everyones problem. literally slamming doors and shit like a child #and now that she is pres of. Anime club she thinks she has some sort of power over me?? absolutely laughable #and she cant even talk to me. like i didnt have any problems with her last year but she insisted i did and caused a split in the group #and so now she uses her partner as some messenger ehich pissed me off even more. like really. #and shes trying to get me kicked off the eboard cuz i value school over a hobbies club???? #literally made an attendance rule because she was pissed i go to math tutoring during club even tho i went to meetings and shit. not like #she ever even gave me any responsibility because she is too childish to handle shit like an adult #also....if i get kicked off. its anime club 💀 #sorry but thats just so funny to me lmaooo #Like she thinks she has any power over me in absolutely any way....it's very funny to me #oh well she'll have her little power trip and then go complain to anyone who will listen #this sounds mean because i am being mean. i usually always try to be nice but god she has taken this shit too far #annoying ass little kid. i dont have tike to deal with her made up rivalry with me #just literally leave me alone i dont care about you. im annoyed i have to even think about her again. shes such a manipulative asshole #well whatever that got that oit of my system. until tomorrow #rants #vent #rambles

[roleplayersoul]

send me "💡" and i’ll tell you a something about my muse that I had considered, but ended up not using for their story - For N!

Less so "consider" and moreso "I've swapped back and forth like....4 times", but the default version I have for N constantly changes. He was depicted with Reshiram a lot more frequently for a while, but I always felt like his goals aligned more closely with "ideals", which is Black version, so I guess I've landed on that again? But really, I think it just made me realize that I guess I can't bother to care about that anymore.

There was some small part of me that really, REALLY wanted to ignore Black and White 2 entirely or write out some alternative in between, or at least cop-out Nate/Rosa. I've grown out of this, but I'm still very, VERY salty over a lot of simpler plot directions Black and White 2 took after Black and White blew me out of the water. I get it. I want to be over it. But honestly, I still can't find the will to bring myself to play it over at any consistent rate again.

#N muse #sort of venty #pokemon bw #ooc #ask meme #vanillahub #it's funny if y'all find my cringeass old youtube channel you will see how HYPED i was for black and white two #and had me SCREAMING while playing and watching the intro out of joy #ironically its right about when the footage ends at flosccey ranch right before virbank that it really started hitting me #that i wasn't going to get some really amazing thought provoking sequel with black and white #i like with what they did with a lot of the old characters tho #just Very Much Not Team Plasma #can we talk about how colress literally comes out of left field and makes no sense? #its not to say i dislike these characters or whatever im just #salty #vent #long #OR THE BALANCING BEING WHACK AS HELL TOO #they totally give you the options to deal with it #too many even #but its like you're getting steamroll slogged or the opposite #anyways this is why i will never pick snivy again

[0rionz-belt]

its hard to think that there was at least a week of my life where I balanced marching band, my rock band program, writing, drawing, and theater on top of high school. I talked to people, both friends and unfamiliar with no issue. And i never thought anything of it.

5 years later and I can barely function doing even 3 of those things. i miss being an artist.

#vent #on the other hand i really shouldnt idolize that version of myself #after all. That kid's insecurity is what caused this. #she was so scared her crush was going to leave her and what did she do? She freaked out and made the process go faster. #i cant even begin to wonder how long it would have taken if that never happened. maybe it wouldnt have been so tragic. #she didnt know her crush liked her too. #by all means i should be considering her a different person. #she was an ENFP girl from Seattle. adopted bc her parents didnt have the money. took a miracle pill with apparently different uses. #im Orion. an INFP enby who was meant to be born in Indiana. adopted for my and my mom's safety. I take Vyvanse for adhd and that alone. #She was an artist who tried every new thing she came across but was scared of carnival rides and coasters. #I am a pathetic shell of a person whos just getting back into the flow of doing art stuff again after 4 years. #and i am...significantly less afraid of carnival rides and rollercoasters. #its funny. the parts about where im from and why im adopted and what my medication is for. #those are not things about my personality. except for the medication part tbh. #but they are important to who i am. i had to dig that shit out of my parents. finding it out over the past 3 years. #i dont know. is it really such a crime to want to be who i once was and keep traits of who i currently am? #also no just because i misgender myself here doesnt mean you get to as well. #but yeah. thats why i call myself an it.

[living-as-the-enemy-prince]

Ayyee haunted by amatonormativity hour

#🪐.txt #why do you exist #ugh. amatonormativity makes me so sad and lonely and bitter #even if i have multiple and diverse relationships without having THE 'one' and be happy with that #the majority of society would view that as wrong and like. ik i shouldn't care abt strangers' opnions but it still hurts #yknow? #like. thinking abt how one day many of my friends will find a partner and even if they dont think like that. outsiders will be probably view #me as. idk how to word this. as a third wheel who is in the way of their friends' relationships hurts #prob i will be that #and it hurts #also somehow related- i can view myself getting married but i wouldn't view said married partner as my most important person #but still its kinda funny and annoying how most people would assume otherwise #actually. the only context in which i would use 'my most important person' would be if i had a child. cuz thatd be my duty as parent #anyways i just needed to vent a lil bit. now im better and came back to 'i dont fucking care' mood. so im fine. #that's why i call haunted by the amatonormativity hour. its temporary. #im happy that im lucky enough to be aroace. i got the chance to open my eyes to countless forms of relationships that arent more or less #from another #that rocks

[flutt3rb4tz]

the irony in "you have to drink water when youre sick!" is that often time it is harder for me to drink water than literally any other liquid (case of i have really bad liquid sensory issues + my throat often hurts in a way where water is painful or uncomfortable to drink while sick) so im basicallu just torturing myself every time i get a cold and start decomposing live

literally drinking coke rn n my throat feels like 10000000 times better. i feel like the irritation was the water actually /hj

#💞 god is calling #not a vent i just find it funny that being sick is so weird for me #iterally my throat feels way better rn. genuinely its not even scratchy #what the fuck #coke-a-cola saving my life rn ig #i can actually breathe w/o coughing on phlegm a lil #yahoo! #yippee!!! #yay!!