#keep em coming! i love these /nf | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

oddball-artz · 1 month

Note

OMG YOU HAVE SPOONS!!!!!! YIPPIE!!!! (probably bc you got a good night's sleep)

And if you know me at all, be prepared for the sea of questions>:]

1) Go into detail about Dalia and Sabrina and their family in the second Gen au. Any Hcs or stuff?

2) Nyx and his relationship with his family.

3) (idk if it was onyx or nyx who had the ED, I forgor their names are so similar).Go into detail Abt thier ED, tho.

4) For the love of God drop Hcs till I die, I don't care for who, I just NEED them.

And, if you have spoons don't be afraid to look in your inbox for any other asks I may have sent/nf (bc both me and you forget about the asks tbh)

And as always, ily platonically, man :333

It is not the sleep, I don't need sleep, idk what it was if it wasn't the sleep, but im not being proven wrong /j

I've only got a couple, and they're pretty Dalia centric, but you can have em

Dalia picked up a bunch of tips and tricks for dealing with kids both from helping raise her siblings and from treating kids as a nurse, uses them all the time, her personal favorite thay she's picked up is doubling bedsheets when kids are sick so that if they get dirty you can just take it off and make it a later problem while you comfort said sick child. Dalia is also very sentimental as a parent, cries at every ceremony and graduation. Sometimes she'll say something that sounds like her mother and she goes quiet for a while after that. I have a feeling that Sabrina and Dalia's house tends to be the designated 'safe house' for Vee and Jasper's friends. Dalia's actually kind of happy about this, in her mind it's confirmation that she's not her mother. (This may or may not be based on the fact that my house irl is the safehouse). All I have rn, sorry

Next up Nyx, my boy. He feels like a walking second place trophy compared to all his siblings. Brushes it off in an Rottmnt Leo sort of way, through humor and a facade of confidence. Desperately wants anyone to be proud of him. Takes his little siblings out crimeing™️ together sometimes, and is like the number one supporter of their shenanigans. Let's them steal his shit, as long as they don't get caught(bc he taught them better than that). The only thing he'd put up a fight against having stolen is his binder, but that's about it.

Oh and Onyx is the one with an ED, she has anorexia specifically. It started with her just trying to lose weight, she's fairly light, but her frame is wide, so she didn't see any results and things got drastic from there, especially when people started making fun of her for her body. She's super sensitive to comments about her body, and the bullying just made it so much worse. She hates looking at herself, in mirrors, in pictures, anything. It's like her eyes pick out the flaws every time and she can't stand it. So she's trying to 'fix' herself, much to the worry of the people around her. She eats in the dream bubbles, but that's only because she knows that it isn't real. Harlow noticed this and has started sneaking food into the dream bubbles just so Onyx eats for once. Onyx still hasn't caught onto this.

And various hcs about the sillies

Onyx spins her drumsticks between her fingers when she's bored, she can do it really fast too

Nyx's hoodie he wears in his sprite is his dysphoria hoodie

Gray has a lot of little interests she keeps hidden. They tend to be niche and geeky, so she hides them to protect her image

Nyx can project his voice loud enough to yell over the band

Onyx is only ever quiet when she's flustered or thinking about somthing, other than that there's usually at least a dull chatter coming from her

Onyx is very physically affectionate, she straight up tackle hugs people.

Gray was a pageant kid,and his parents were very competitive about it. They still have all their sashes from it too

Onyx doesn't fight for herself, but if you say something bad about someone she cares about that's when she starts a fight. Starting fights like that is what got her thrown through a window that one time

Onyx is the one who started calling Alison peepaw, and it just stuck after that

When Alison sleeps she doesn't snore, she shuffles through radio channels under her breath, kind of like sleeptalking

Speaking of Alison, he's insecure about the radio affect his voice has

Alison is very protective of the kids she's 'adopted' (usually underclassmen, but they've also taken most of the radio class under their wing)

#Alison Akari (oc)#Nyx Roughhouse (oc)#Dalia Kalmeren (oc)#Gray Arison (oc)#Onyx Brighton (oc)#asks #answered ask #oc headcanons #epithet erased oc #oc lore #pretty much just an infodump lol

3 notes · View notes

chaos-and-ink · 2 months

Text

My fav lyrics from HOPE (NF)

HOPE What's my definition of success? / Creating something no one else can It's a person that can take the failures in their life and turn them into motivation / It's believing in yourself when no one else does If I'd have never hit rock bottom / Would I be the person that I am today? / I don't believe so

MOTTO Yeah, that don't make no sense to you, well, of course / See, one man's inconvenience is another's joy Where it ain't how big you are, it's how big you seem / Where people sacrifice the art tryna chase a dream / Then they wonder why they music's lackin' creativity

CAREFUL We come from the bottom, we still at the bottom

MAMA I look at the situation you had / Might of made the mistake of leavin', but it's makin' me sad / Thinkin' of you how you grew up, tryin' to cope with your past / Were you like me in your relationships and pushed away dad? I gotta know, mama Did you think you were trash? / Somethin' disposable that nobody could love or be glad? / To say they was with you, that issue is a issue I have Nobody's perfect, yeah, I guess we all fall short / And I can't hold this unforgiveness in my heart no more / So just know you're lovable to me and of course / You'll always be mama to us, so save a table for four, and know that

HAPPY Hanging by a thread's how I live / I don't know why, but I feel more comfortable Living in my agony, watching my self-esteem / Go up in flames, acting like I don't Yeah, been this way so long / It feels like something's off when I'm not depressed I'll be the first to admit that I'm a lonely soul / And the last to admit I need a hand to hold / Losing hope, headed down a dangerous road / Strange, I know, but I feel most at home when I'm

PANDEMONIUM Keep my enemies at arm's length, but / Close enough to make me feel safe

SUFFICE Just part of the game, yeah, it comes with the territory / It's just another day, man, I'm used to it down pourin' Who cares if underneath I'm hurtin'? / If there's one thing I've learned in / My life, it's that life is uncertain Gettin' burned is unavoidable, isn't it? / Ain't a person alive that hasn't been a victim

GONE Always saw my glass as half empty, it was never full / You were always passive and I was irresponsible

BULLET Look, I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it / You ever need me for any reason, let me know Beautiful is what are you are, I know you doubt it daily Yeah, both got trauma sometimes I see it work against us / Other times I see it bring us close and connect us My lack of encouragement hovers over us both / Still you love me, it's mind blowing

TURN MY BACK I don't need nobody showing me the ropes / I don't need you, tellin' me to do my job

MISTAKE I've got qualities that I'm not proud of / I've made promises that I walked out on / I've had days I feel I don't deserve love No confidence / Struggle with it, that's obvious / But not enough to make me second guess / If I'd die for the ones I love I feel trapped / I might lash out / I gotta watch my back So think what you think, just don't call me a / Mistake

LET EM PRAY I've seen what it can do when I got both of my arms full / But still to continue to pile more on my back though Every step I've ever taken in the wrong direction / Helped me get to where I am today

RUNNING I'm tired / Of holding on to you, it's time to let / My pride / Go and learn to love myself again, yeah I'm done running from you / Spent my whole life in your shadow / Scared of who I'd be if I / Said goodbye and I didn't have you here I love you but not enough to allow you to continue to drown the both of us, you're / Holding me back, you're pulling me down, you're making me hate myself, I / Don't wanna leave, but that's what I need, I ain't got a choice, I can't just / Let you deceive and make me believe that I don't deserve to be loved

#chaos #fav songs #fav lyrics #nf #nf real music #nf music

4 notes · View notes

away-ward · 5 months

Note

hello! I wasn’t the anon who sent the last question however I do want to respond to some of the things you pointed. I think your characterization of emmy is way better than mine bc I always want the best for her but that doesn’t mean that the emmy in nf would make the choices I would make if I were in her shoes. I feel like my anger towards will definitely clouds my judgement of what is best for emmy if that makes sense. However, I wanted to point out a quote you said.

“If you love someone, you don't just throw that in their face.”

I agree with this statement, however, will has gone so low to the point where he throws his escapades with alex back at her face. I applaud em for being a better person but in my opinion if will goes low em should go LOWER. I know that that is a petty way of thinking but in em’s case she has to be around alex (around the woman that will has slept with multiple times). I just think it would be unfair for em to have to live with constant reminder’s of will’s past but will never has to live with any reminders of em’s life in san francisco. I just feel like em gets the shorter end of the stick… so if em wants to be petty one day she should have the right to do so.

Also I never know if I come across as harsh or argumentative over anon but I promise you that i’m not trying to be 😭

No worries. I never take it as harsh, unless there's clear hostility. I honestly thought they were new and didn't know what had gone on with No Apologies, which is fine. I just figured I take the opportunity to explain.

I get the desire for Emory to be petty. I've had my daydreams and fantasies too. But the "if they go low, you go lower" is such a horsemen way of looking at things. Who knows, maybe they'll influence her and drag her to that level. As always, Will is the source of his own undoing😂

And about Will throwing Alex in Emory's face being proof of his lack of love doesn't hit the same with me. He was actively denying his feelings and trying to hurt her. I meant if you're in a relationship with someone and you are claiming to love them, you don't say things designed to hurt them, which would be the situation if I were to write a fic where they're married.

People also keep saying that Emory has to keep company with Alex, as if she hasn't also slept with Alex. As if sleeping with Alex is something that's hard to do. As if Alex doesn't roll on her back, legs wide open for just about any character in this series. Pithom crew, Lev, Banks, Rika, Michael, Damon...

Will's not unique.

Emory got the short end of the stick? Everyone in this crew knows exactly how good Alex is, good enough to pay for her college education and a luxury apartment, and they still picked someone else to commit to and love.

Emory knew that Alex wasn't going anywhere when she asked Will to marry her. She's clearly not threatened in the least. Can you imagine? Will sleeps with this girl for the nearly five years and yet the second you appear in the scene and give him a second chance, he never thinks about going back to her? The power trip Emory should feel in Alex's presence?

But I know that most of the readers doubt Will's loyalty and commitment (I don't). And I know PD didn't write the Emory and Alex to have a competition, but if they did, Emory won that round and every round after.

Emory showing up everyday with a satisfied smile on her face, still warm from Will's bed, is petty enough for me.

Thanks for responding! I probably won't ever jump on this train, but I understand it's appeal.

Edit: coming back to say that I don't think my characterization of Em is better than any one's. I see her in a certain light, but it's not the correct one. It's just the one I enjoy. PD's proven that I can be so very wrong about these characters. If you see Em being petty and using her past to make Will realize he has a lot to make up for whatever her motive is, that's just as likely as her not doing it.

Sorry, i thought that when I read the ask, but then I never said it and I thought I really needed to😅

#asked and answered #asked and answered 190 #related to prev ask #asked and answered 189 #emory scott #willemmy #my dns tag

3 notes · View notes

castle-dominion · 10 months

Text

Part one of the blooper reel

Sorry for the bad quality filming, I don't have the ability to screenrecord.

RC: How do you run in these things? KB: Shut up & pull RC/NF: You say pull your shoes say pole SK (KB): What? NF (RC): Ahn? Ahn?? :D

NF: *sneezes like a kitten & flails his hands a bit* uwu NF mouthing/whispering: We'll cut that out *makes snipping motions with his hands*

SK: *dancing with an evil smile*

RC: Mother, get down! MR/SS: *looks around a bit before dropping down behind the desk* D: *Cut to them both laughing af*

KR: Found something you'd want to see SD (KR): *laugh/scoff* You have a line! *points one finger while walking backwards to where he is when he starts the scene*

[In the morgue] KB: Let's go update captain Montgomery. RC, spotting his daughter in the other room: Can you give me a minute? KB/SK: No-- SK (KB): wait-- SK (KB): Captain Montgomery is dead *someone says "ouh" & NF bursts out laughing, even the dead guy cracks a smile* ((I sort of wish that they keep small mistakes in, it would make it more real. Maybe if someone slurs or stutters their line a bit but not horribly idk I'm not a director or editor))

*Sophia Turner passes Castle a card or smth* *NF/RC drops it & needs to bend down to pick it up* JB (ST) loud-whispers: Loser

NF (RC): *come here gesture* NF mouths: come here Camera: *turns to him a bit* NF: *over here* NF mouths: come right here Cam: *zooms in* NF mouths: come on NF: *nods while still saying "come here" with his fingers* Cam: *continues to focus on him* NF: *makes the "ok" symbol with his hands & gives a little kiss*

Turner/Oliver/Connor/Tucker/Tanner (I can't hear his name): You guys are De-TEC-tives huh? *leans up on his toes during the "tec" of detective* JE: *Looks at Beckett in expressionless confusion* Uniformed Officer: Hahah I'm still in a squad car *a single "hm" laugh* JE: *looks back to uni* UO: I uh, almost made detective once but had a little *puts hand by his mouth* pRobLEm WiTh thE wEEd *ha* so anyway. Guys sent me down. I'm Oliver, I'm new. ((DANG I WISH THEY HAD KEPT THIS IN I LOVE HIM SO MUCH)) ((also this was before weed was even legal in california, before it was legal in canada))

KB, breaking down the phone sex door: NYPD!!! *part of the door frame falls on her*

SD: ... Did one of you fart?

KB/SK: He had a slight hitch in his walk. I think he had a physical therap-- JE/JH: *cocks head a bit* KB/SK: I think he had a phylic-- NF/RC: *recoils minutely* SK/KB: physical disability NF/RC: someone does

KR: Nao but we got unis canvassing... *bug flies around* KR con't: every eyewitness & street level... *bug flies closer* KR, a bit strained: security guard *bug flies wildly & then NF/RC comes behind him waving away the fly* KR con't: Just after... SD, unable to contain his smile: Let's do that again *runs backwards in a cute dancey canter* SD, to NF: You saved me

KB: But it-.. did get everywhere-- TJ (LP) I think: *fails at holding back a laugh* SK (KB): How does that damn line go? *laughs*

LP: If there's even some, it's probably-- TJ (LP), suddenly: What is it!? *makes wide eyes off to the side* Bitch... XP

PJJ/VG: some of my detectives keep me informed as to thei a whu cho'pa habakta

NF/RC: Odette paid for Barbara's f- sur ger y a.nd im ur mamnga ma mh

TJ (Betsy Sinclair/LP): Yes; & I don't appreciate you lugs mopping him with the floor the other night. ((Dang she's hot)) NF: Ooh/ew Director, OS & therefore echoey & muted: Say that line again TJ/BS/LP: I don't approve-- NF, overlapping: Mopping the floor with him TJ: *surprised pikachu* TJ: ??? What did I say? ((I feel her, I feel her))

NF/RC: He also admitted to making a low net vengeance em ne nem me 'h hm

RC: You change the letters around, you get ___ KB: Stan Lee. *writes Stan' then pauses & writes Lee* Comic book genius. StanA Katic (KB), leaning against the whiteboard: I found myself writing "Stana Lee" XD

Director: Can you do a little double take on that? SK: That- it's- it's a sexual thing? Director: Well,, Yeah. SK: Oh Everyone: XD

#castle season 4 #castle s4 bonus features #castle s4 outtakes #castle s4 clip

1 note · View note

halfblood-princes-crown · 2 years

Text

Songs that remind me of Severus Snape Pt. 3

(This one is longer because the whole song reminds me of him)

Lost by NF

Self-awareness, pride's a coat, and yes, I like to wear it

Buttoned up, don't like to let no air in

With a pair of gloves that I hope doesn't perish

I discovered, though, when I get holes in them

And I let joy in, I'm in higher spirits

My mistakes are like a screamin' parrot

Just repeating lyrics, I can barely bear it when I'm lost

Road is narrow, I'm lookin' down it like a gun's barrel

Aren't we all searchin' for the serum

That could help us breathe and leave our state of peril?

All of us have made defensive scarecrows

That we scatter 'round our fields and treat like heroes

When they scare away the things that we should cherish

'Cause we're too embarrassed to admit the fear is that we're lost

Yeah, but what does it matter? I get so combative

Inside of me's a personal canvas, the paint can be splattered

Get messy when I start to get rattled

The heart of a savage, I'm quiet when I lurk in the shadows

But somethin' don't add up, I don't wanna be overdramatic

But look at the data, it's obvious that humans are fragile

We tend to get mad at the ones that call us out

But the fact is we need someone that'll be honest when we fly off the handle

I admit I throw a fit when I begin to unravel

Keep my wits, been off the grid but now I'm back in the saddle

My intent is not to rent, I like to own what I value

I could sit here on the fence or maybe pick up the paddle

I like to row against the current, that's the way that I travel

Opposite of what the grain does, got the brain of a rebel

Take initiative, I'm diligent on every level

I never could settle, I like to keep my foot on the pedal, yeah

I'd love to pack arenas and all

But what I really wanna do is learn to handle my thoughts

And put the reins on 'em, show 'em I'm the one that's the boss

And pull 'em back when they get out of hand, I'm breakin' they jaws

I'm takin' the flaws that told me I could never evolve

Then pull a Bane on 'em, ask 'em, "Oh, you think you're in charge?"

You oughta know better, ain't no way around it, I'm flawed

The traits that I want, they say I can't afford what it cost

But I (I), manifested this

Failing's how you grow and learn your lessons, kids

Take the worst and try to make the best of it

'Cause when you fail, just know that it's a test and if

You can learn to pick yourself back up again

And train your brain to not be such a pessimist

It's okay to make mistakes, just don't forget that

There's a high road but I skip the exit when I'm lost

Yeah

When I'm lost

When I'm lost (lost)

When I'm lost

When I'm lost (lost), lost

Wow, these burdens are heavy

And I'm hopin' it don't bury me

I used to be joyful and skip so merrily

But now I'm too cautious and tip toe carefully

My mind left and it's nowhere to be found

Am I a big old parody?

'Cause it's no fair to me

And now I'm at the point where I'm spending a grand a week on hypnotherapy

Look, I'm tryna wash away my sins

I got a group of loved ones that ain't my friends

And if I ever take an L, then they might grin

And they all wanna see me stay in the cage I'm in

So when it comes to anybody, there's no trust for no one

Man, so what? My whole plan's to go nuts

My shoulders ready for more shrugs, I'm gon' judge

Anybody tryna enter my circle with no love (hold up)

My sanity's gone, I'd rather be torn from this planet they planted me on

Yes, that's a reward, I'm actually bored with having a sore heart

It's torn apart from a family that I don't have anymore (now hol' up)

I was livin' so oblivious with millions, it really was a pity, huh? (A pity, huh?)

It's kinda funny what a penny does, mixed in with a mini buzz (I feel stuck)

Life's got me by the neck, with a blade against it (what?)

'Cause I was runnin' late for the train and missed it (what?)

The only thing I feel is pain and vengeance (what?)

So I'ma act out like a raging misfit (what?)

And every verse I lay gon' stay sadistic (yeah)

You wanna hate me? Good, great, terrific (good)

You'll never see the day where my anger's dismissed

You better go and change your wishlist 'cause I

Yeah, manifested this

Do not treat me like some adolescent kid

I am praying to the Lord with the book of James

Hopin' he gon' add my testament

This dark cloud, that's my residence

Demons knockin', I don't have to let 'em in

I done made mistakes, day to day, you probably can't relate

I just ain't the same when I'm lost

#Our lost Prince #severus snape #pro snape #harry potter #snapedom #Spotify

7 notes · View notes

itsabeautifullif3 · 3 years

Quote

Look Self-awareness, pride’s a coat and yes, I like to wear it Buttoned up, don’t like to let no air in With a pair of gloves, that I hope doesn’t perish I discovered, though, when I get holes in ‘em and I let joy in, I’m in higher spirits My mistakes are like a screamin’ parrot Just repeatin’ lyrics, I can barely bear it when I’m lost Road is narrow, I’m lookin’ down it like a gun’s barrel Aren’t we all searchin’ for the serum that could help us breathe and leave our state of peril? All of us have made defensive scarecrows, that we scatter 'round our fields and treat like heroes When they scare away the things that we should cherish 'Cause we’re too embarrassed to admit the fear is that we’re lost Yeah, but what does it matter? I get so combative Inside of me’s a personal canvas, the paint can be splattered Get messy when I start to get rattled The heart of a savage, I’m quiet when I lurk in the shadows But somethin’ don’t add up, I don’t wanna be overdramatic But look at the data, it’s obvious that humans are fragile We tend to get mad at the ones that call us out but the fact is we need someone that’ll be honest when we fly off the handle I admit I throw a fit when I begin to unravel Keep my wits, been off the grid but now I’m back in the saddle My intent is not to rent, I like to own what I value I could sit here on the fence or maybe pick up the paddle I like to row against the current, that’s the way that I travel Opposite of what the grain does, got the brain of a rebel Take initiative, I’m diligent on every level I never could settle, I like to keep my foot on the pedal, yeah I’d love to pack arenas and all But what I really wanna do is learn to handle my thoughts And put the reins on 'em, show 'em I’m the one that’s the boss And pull 'em back when they get out of hand, I’m breakin’ they jaws I’m takin’ the flaws, that told me I could never evolve Then pull a Bane on 'em, ask 'em, “Oh, you think you’re in charge?” You oughta know better, ain’t no way around it, I’m flawed The traits that I want, they say I can’t afford what it cost But I, manifested this Failing’s how you grow and learn your lessons, kids Take the worse and try to make the best of it 'Cause when you fail, just know it’s a test and if You can learn to pick yourself back up again And train your brain to not be such a pessimist It’s okay to make mistakes, just don’t forget that There’s a high road but I skip the exit when I’m lost Yeah When I’m lost When I’m lost When I’m lost When I’m lost, lost Wow, these burdens are heavy And I’m hopin’ it don’t bury me I used to be joyful and skip so merrily But now I’m too cautious and tip toe carefully My mind left and it’s nowhere to be found Am I a big ol’ parody? 'Cause it’s no fair to me And now I’m at the point where I’m spending a grand a week on hypnotherapy Look, I’m tryna wash away my sins I got a group of loved ones that ain’t my friends And if I ever take an L then they might grin And they all wanna see me stay in the cage I’m in So when it come to anybody, there’s no trust for no one Man, so what? My whole plan’s to go nuts My shoulders ready for more shrugs, I’m gon’ judge Anybody tryna enter my circle with no love (Hol’ up) My sanity’s gone, I’d rather be torn from this planet they planted me on Yes, that’s a reward, I’m actually bored with having a sore heart It’s torn apart from a family that I don’t have anymore (Now hol’ up) I was livin’ so oblivious with millions, it really was a pity, huh? (A pity, huh?) It’s kinda funny what a penny does, mixed in with a mini buzz (I feel stuck) Life’s got me by the neck, with a blade against it (What?) Guess I was runnin’ late for the train and missed it (What?) The only thing I feel is pain and vengeance (What?) So I'ma act out like a raging misfit (What?) And every verse I lay gon’ stay sadistic (Yeah) You wanna hate me? Good, great, terrific (Good) You’ll never see the day where my anger’s dismissed You better go and change your wishlist 'cause I Yeah, manifested this Do not treat me like some adolescent kid I am praying to the Lord with the Book of James hopin’ he gon’ add my testament This dark cloud, that’s my residence Demons knockin’, I don’t have to let 'em in I done made mistakes, day to day, you probably can’t relate I just ain’t the same when I’m lost

NF - LOST ft. Hopsin

#nf #LOST #hopsin #self-awareness #pride

11 notes · View notes

beclynn-herondale · 4 years

Text

"I don't see you like I should You look so misunderstood And I wish I could help but it's hard when I hate myself Pray to god with my arms open If this is it, the I feel hopeless And i wish could help But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights are the worst for me They bring out the worst in me Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think If this is all that I wanted, I don't want it, gotta be more for me All the core beliefs And every mornin' I wake up and feel like I ain't my worth 'cause I'm at war with peace Or go to hell, welcome to the corpse of me Look at the body like you ain't nothin' but poor and weak It's kinda weird Lately I been feelin' like the only way for me to get away is to pour a drink That's more deceit, more defeat Is this really what I'm born to be? That's what you get for thinking you're unique So poor, but I'm so wealthy Need help, but you can't help me What else can the world sell me? Tell me lies, I still buy 'em like they goin' outta stock but it's not healthy

I don't see you like I should You look so misunderstood And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself Pray to god with my arms open If this is it then I feel hopeless And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights get the best of me. They know how to get to me. Suicide thoughts come a go like a guest to me. But I don't wanna die, just wanna get relief So don't talk to me like you think I'm so successful. What is success when hope has left you. I'm not a spokesman, I'm a broken record Sick of doin' interviews 'cause I hate myself, agh! Come across like it's so easy. But I feel like you don't need me. When I feel like you don't need me. Then I feel like you don't see me. And my life has no meaning, drain me. Hands out, tryna ask for love. But when I get it, I just pass it up. Throw it away and think about it later. Diggin' through the trash for drugs. Wish I could give you what you needed, but I can't. I'm scared cause

I don't see you like I should You look so misunderstood And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself Pray to god with my arms open If this it then I feel hopeless And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself

I walk through the ashes of my passions Reminiscin' with the baggage of my casket Get lost in the questions I can't answer Can't stand who I am, but it don't matter We scream to be free, but I stay captured Knee-deep in defeat of my own actions Feel weak, but the peace that I keep lackin' keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it But I can't have it Keeps speqnin' to me, but I can't have it. But I can't have it Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

I don't see you like I should You look so misunderstood And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself pray to god with my arms open If this is it then I feel hopeless And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself Hate myself But it's hard when I hate myself Hate myself But it's hard when I hate myself

When I hate myself It's kinda hard when I hate myself I hate myself It's hard when I hate myself

(Hate Myself by NF ) (lyrics)

#NF #nf #hate myself #hate myself nf #lyrics #music #song #songs #tw self deprecation #tw self half #tw self doubt #tw mental health #tw mentions of suicide #tw dark sides #tw dark themes #tw dark thoughts #me #personal

11 notes · View notes

sinterblackwell · 4 years

Text

music tag 🎶

rules: put your playlist on shuffle and write your favorite lyrics from the first ten songs.

thank you @04hands for tagging me 💙

moon by bts - in the crescent moon night, even if i close my eyes, you come to me blue. in the full moon night. do you mind if i open my eyes and hold you? // you who stand by me in the dark night and in the dark day. when you are sad, when you are sick, just shining on me. i will be by your side more brightly in the dark night.

rusted blood by michael schulte - blow my mind and then make me feel what i’ve never had but want so bad. oh, let rivers grow yeah, i call it out. ‘cause i’m lost without love, oh. i need a share.

filter by bts - oh, i will embrace you like in your dreams. oh, it’s a secret spec. for you, every day i’ll be new. it’s not fun to stay the same all the time. // mix the colors in the palette, pick your filter. which me do you want? to change your world, i’m your filter. overlay me in your heart.

i miss the days by nf - see, i miss the days when i wasn’t so faded. love wasn’t always so invasive, i could embrace it. just innocent, waitin’, not always livin’ in anguish. // will we ever feel like we imagine? will we ever feel like we adapted? will we ever feel like we did back then? just take me back when, take me back when.

monsters by seafret - i’m hearing voices in my head i don’t wanna hear, i don’t wanna fear. say you ain’t afraid of nothing, everybody is scared of something, woo-hoo. // smoke in my chest from my last cigarette, and the dog start to howl at the moon. black silhouettes gonna haunt me again, creeping out from the shadows of the room.

why try by ariana grande - oh baby look at us, we been living like angels, living like devils. oh baby look at us, we been loving like angels, loving like devils.

nightingale by demi lovato - somebody speak to me, ‘cause i’m feeling like hell. need you to answer me, i’m overwhelmed. i need a voice to echo, i need a light to take me home. i need a star to follow, i don’t know.

tiptoe by imagine dragons - from your slanted view, see the morning dew. sink into the soil, watch the water boil. they won’t see me run, who can blame them? they never look to see me fly, so i’ve never had to lie. // hey, yeah, don’t let ‘em know we’re coming. hey, yeah, tiptoe higher. take some time to simmer down, keep your head down low. hey, yeah, tiptoe higher.

feel me by selena gomez - do you stay up late, just so you don’t dream?

never been hurt by demi lovato - you set fire to ashes. you fought through the darkness and brought me back to life, you brought me back to life // so even if i lose it all, i got so much left to give, i won’t give up, no, no. my heart’s on the frontline, i’m not afraid.

sometimes, i never really fully register the lyrics when i discover a song. mostly what attaches me to them is how they make me feel, the music and vocals. so once i actually paid attention to the lyrics as i listened to these songs for this game, i understood why i feel so strongly for them. it grounded me, basically. so yeah! this was nice.

i tag: @tawmlinsun @theexecutionerssong and @kritiquer

#🧡#music

3 notes · View notes

theladyingray · 4 years

Text

I don't see you like I should

You look so misunderstood

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Pray to God with my arms open

If this is it, then I feel hopeless

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights are the worst for me

They bring out the worst in me

Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think

If this is all that I wanted, I don't want it, gotta be more for me

All the core beliefs

And every mornin' I wake up and feel like I ain't my worth 'cause I'm at war with peace

Or go to Hell, welcome to the corpse of me

Look at the body like you ain't nothin' but poor and weak

It's kinda weird

Lately I been feelin' like the only way for me to get away is if I pour the drink

That's more deceit, more defeat

Is this really what I'm born to be?

That's what you get for thinkin' you're unique

So poor, but I'm so wealthy

Need help, but you can't help me

What else can the world sell me?

Tell me lies, I still buy 'em like they goin' outta stock

But it's not healthy

I don't see you like I should

You look so misunderstood

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Pray to God with my arms open

If this is it, then I feel hopeless

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights get the best of me

They know how to get to me

Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me

But I don't wanna die, just wanna get relief

So don't talk to me like you think I'm so successful

What is success when hope has left you

I am not a spokesman, I'm a broken record

Sick of doin' interviews 'cause I hate myself, agh!

Come across like it's so easy

But I feel like you don't need me

When I feel like you don't need me

Then I feel like you don't see me

And my life has no meaning, drain me

Hands out, tryna ask for love

But when I get it, I just pass it up

Throw it away and think about it later

Diggin' through the trash for drugs

Wish I could give you what you needed, but I can't

I'm scared because

I don't see you like I should

You look so misunderstood

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Pray to God with my arms open

If this is it, then I feel hopeless

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

I walk through the ashes of my passions

Reminiscin' with the baggage in my casket

Get lost in the questions I can't answer

Can't stand who I am, but it don't matter

We scream to be free, but I stay captured

Knee-deep in defeat of my own actions

Feel weak, but the peace that I keep lackin'

Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

But I can't have it

Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

But I can't have it

Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

I don't see you like I should

You look so misunderstood

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Pray to God with my arms open

If this is it, then I feel hopeless

And I wish I could help

But it's hard when I hate myself

Hate myself

But it's hard when I hate myself

Hate myself

But it's hard when I hate myself

When I hate myself

It's kinda hard when I hate myself

I hate myself

It's hard when I hate myself

3 notes · View notes

alexcrespo4 · 4 years

Text

#EmpireFinale

I remember seeing previews of this show while watching Gotham on demand. Of course I guess what really made me want to watch this show was the idea that your season 1 finale promo introduced NF's first song (not from my perspective). There was even a time where one of Your songs which was called "Can't Truss Em" played during a Gotham promo. I liked the song "Can't Truss Em" because It helped me during rough times along with No Apologies, You're so Beautiful, Good Enough, Keep your money, Drip Drop, Born to love you, never love again, One More Minute, Love is like a Drug, Trapped, and Powerful, but then there's music that I don't like but I'm not gonna list them off. The show was pretty popular back in 2015, I've seen a few SNL sketches of the show on YouTube. There was some crazy moments of Empire that I will NOT put in order, like Cookie hitting Hakeem with a broom TWICE, Lucious putting Jamal in the trash, Lucious' mom almost drowned him to death, Jamal coming out during a song, Hakeem and Tiana getting together, Rhonda falling down the stairs while she was pregnant, Lucious getting arrested, Jamal got shot by Freida Gatz after she found out Lucious killed her father, Cookie's Dad kicks her out of the house and then dies of a heart attack because of it, Lucious' mom is revealed to be alive, Jamal killed Angelo Dubois (which is what that Uncle Tom deserved), Hakeem got kidnapped and then gets Anika pregnant and then later the baby is kidnapped by the Dubois family, Bruce Wayne becomes Batman (Wrong show but still my favorite episode) Lucious kills Shine Johnson also known as the host of Pimp My Ride, Andre had a hallucinogenic girlfriend, Hakeem almost got married, Lucious loses his memory, Hakeem getting shot, and loses one of his lungs, Jamal lies and says two Trump supporters attacked him (oh wait that was Jussie), and finally Kingsley reveals himself as the b*****d son of Lucious and White Tracy, Lucious' Ex/Crackhead Mama. Many people didn't like Kingsley because he was trying to run the Empire, but then they felt bad when he blew his brains out at the end of Season 5, because Andre needed a new heart, but then everybody hates him again when he takes over Andre and ruins his marriage with Terri, and now Andre is going to South America and is probably never coming back, and I honestly don't blame him because I'm pretty much done with this show. I'll admit that there was a time where I did like the show, because it had it's ups and downs, especially when I unfollowed Empire's Twitter (which I've known for retweeting or commenting on my hilarious tweets) because they kept retweeting a show that I don't watch called Star which was cancelled after 3 seasons on a cliffhanger, and now there's only one episode of Empire left, but there should have been 2 or 3 more but the Coronavirus is ruining everything and everyone's in quarantine. So what I'm trying to say, is that I can't watch the series finale of Empire on Tuesday, April 21st is because it's the same day as when The Flash and DC's Legends returns, so what I would like to say, Thank You Empire for the songs you gave us, and Thank You Lee Daniels for existing. TO THE EMPIRE!!!!!!!!!! #empirefox

#empire #terrence howard #taraji p. henson #what is love #no apologies #drip drop #hustleandflow

2 notes · View notes

chaos-and-ink · 2 months

Text

My fav lyrics from The Search (NF)

The Search Last year I had a breakdown / Thoughts tellin' me I'm lost gettin' too loud See, we've all got somethin' that we trapped inside / That we try to suffocate, you know, hopin' it dies / Try to hold it underwater but it always survives / Then it comes up out of nowhere like an evil surprise / Then it hovers over you to tell you millions of lies Just think about it for a second, if you look at your face / Every day when you get up and think you'll never be great / You'll never be great, not because you're not, but the hate / Will always find a way to cut you up and murder your faith

Leave Me Alone Ruminating, filled balloons full of doubts / Do the same things, if I don't, I'm overwhelmed / Thoughts are pacing, they go 'round and 'round and 'round / It's so draining, let's move onto something else, fine Hold up my balloons and cover up my face / I can feel them weighing on me every day / I should let 'em go and watch 'em float away / But I'm scared if I do, then I'll be more afraid I don't need advice from my doubts right now / End of conversation

Change I don't do drugs, I'm addicted to the pain though / Yeah, I been on it for a while, dunno how to put it down You don't know what love is 'til you holdin' onto somethin' that you can't lose Most of my life, I always felt like I was holdin' my breath / Holdin' my chest to be honest, so I'm tired of it / Lookin' for somethin' in my life to be inspired again Yeah, I don't like new things / Got a lot of mood swings That's me avoidin' the change / Yeah, that's probably why the issues ain't goin' away / Yeah, that's probably why I always sit around and complain / Tellin' myself that I ain't never gettin' out of this place Yeah, that's why I'm checkin' my vitals / They keep on workin', but I know / Breathin' don't mean you're alive so

My Stress Yeah, some days, I just wanna leave the negativity in my head / I just want relief from my stress Pressure pushin' me from all sides / Insecurities of all kinds / Yeah, I'm a hostage to my own pride Yeah, I live my life on the edge, don't want the meds / I'm just tryna get relief from my stress, you know?

Nate Yeah, sometimes I wanna disappear like I just don't exist / Or find a time machine and take me back when I was six / Maybe younger, either way, I guess the point of it / Would be to tell that little kid that he's gon' take a lot of hits Look, we're all products of the things that we experience / But there's a big difference between confidence and arrogance You know how we've always struggled with abandonment? / And when we feel like someone's leaving, we start panickin'? / And yo, I wish that I could say I've learned to manage it / You think it's bad now, but you don't know the half of it You know how intoxicated people make us nervous? / To the point sometimes we shake and it feels so disturbin' / Don't be scared, that's just trauma tryna reach the surface / And tell us everyone we love is gonna try to hurt us / Which isn't true, but it's a lie that both of us believe in

Time A little time to show you I'm worth it / I know that I can be a difficult person Comes out the most when I feel I'm in a vulnerable place / Made a lot of mistakes I wish I knew how to erase / When I'm afraid, might get distant and I push you away / But no matter the case, I'ma do whatever it takes even if You know me well, sittin' on the edge of my seat / Lookin' at life, overanalyzin' everything / Always depressed, tryna find a better version of me / Searching for somethin' I know's prolly right in front of my feet And I know it hurts knowing that I carry this weight on my chest / Making it difficult for me to open up and connect

Returns What is perfect? Not me / I've been overworking for weeks When I'm lower, feel like I'm spiraling / Pushing forward, look, I can't ignore it This life's so unpredictable, it just keeps pitching me curves / I take a swing, I hate the things that make me feel like I'm dirt / I've patiently been waiting, please, I think it's time for my turn

When I Grow Up I understand you gotta crawl before you get to your feet / But I been running for a while, they ain't ready for me

Only I can't be the only one who's lonely tonight Yeah, why you throwin' rocks, oh, you wanna kill my dreams? / Okay, tell me everything I'm not / You think I didn't know those things? / Always been a little lost and I still might be Things that I hold on to, but I won't say things that I won't let go / So I chain my soul to the heartbreak Yeah, if you made a list of people that you trusted / Would you put your name down? Am I the only one that has a loaded gun / That's full of doubts and memories to overcome? / And I complain about 'em when they shoot at me / But I know truthfully I like to load 'em up and let 'em

Let Me Go Talk to you with my hands tied / Walk towards you on a fine line / Everybody has a dark side / I feel embarrassed when they see mine Am I a good person or a lost one? / Will this feel worth it when I'm all done? / Will I feel ashamed of like who I was? / With the pain vanish or will more come? Will I stay numb or regain love? / Maybe someday have a taste of freedom? / Will I take the poison out of my blood? / Or just leave it there inside of my lungs? They want me to beg, they want me to plead, they want me to die / They just want me dead, they just want me hurt / Don't want me to live, don't want me alive I'll teach them a lesson, I pick up the weapon / Aim in your direction, shoot at my reflection / Shatter my perception, hate it when I'm desperate / You just want perfection, I want you to let me

Hate Myself Yeah, late nights are the worst for me / They bring out the worst in me / Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think / If this is all that I wanted, I don't want it, gotta be more for me What else can the world sell me? / Tell me lies, I still buy 'em like they goin' outta stock Yeah, late nights get the best of me / They know how to get to me / Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me / But I don't wanna die, just wanna get relief Come across like it's so easy / But I feel like you don't need me / When I feel like you don't need me / Then I feel like you don't see me / And my life has no meaning, drain me Hands out, tryna ask for love / But when I get it, I just pass it up / Throw it away and think about it later / Diggin' through the trash for drugs I walk through the ashes of my passions / Reminiscin' with the baggage in my casket We scream to be free, but I stay captured / Knee-deep in defeat of my own actions

I Miss The Days Not always goin' to bed every night / With this knot in my stomach that never unwinds When did I start to believe I wasn't worth it / Then question my purpose to breathe? / Wonderin' who I should be / Happiness out of my reach / Scared to get back on my feet See, I miss the days when I wasn't so faded / Love wasn't always invasive, I could embrace it / Just innocent, waitin', not always livin' in anguish I miss the smiles we had when we were young / I miss the memories of feeling love / I miss us runnin' underneath the sun / Staring out the window when the rain would com Give me my mind back / The one that told me I was worth somethin' when I fall flat / The one that told me I was worth somethin' when I'm off track / Back when my imagination wasn't in a cage and it was free to run fast Yeah, give me my, give me my mind back / Before it was hijacked and wasn't described as / A place of limitation, always indicating I can't / Handle everything from my past Take me back when I was happy, but I wasn't actin' / Vulnerable but didn't see it like some kind of weakness / Or a thing that's unattractive / Had emotion, but I learned to mask it I miss the smiles we had when we were kids, yeah / I feel like life was so much simpler then, yeah / When we had joy and we were innocent / I'd give it all to feel that way again, way again

No Excuses Ay, yeah, they asked me where I learned to do this / Self-taught, checkin' things off my to-do list Yeah, I know I can be a nuisance / Ain't afraid to admit it if I think the shoe fits Take a shot behind my back, I'ma catch the bullets

Like This Yeah, holding back / Yeah, I've always been good at that, unattached Got me in the sad feels, got me at a standstill / Too much time alone is when it gets real Yeah, maybe I'm impossible to be with / I know that you got a thousand reasons / You prolly wanna leave, but don't know how, yeah

Options I'm an outlaw, my brain has no fence / Doesn't matter either way to me 'cause even if it did I would destroy it

WHY Yeah, what's your definition of success? / I don't trust the thoughts that come inside my head / I don't trust this thing that beats inside my chest / Who I am and who I wanna be cannot connect I push away the people that I love the most I could be workin' for twenty-four hours a day and think I never did enough Hold my issues up for all to see, like show and tell / A lot of people know me, but they don't know me well

Thinking Yeah, I wish that I was optimistic / I wish that I could trust my intuition / To most, negative thinking makes you a pessimist, but / To me, negative thinking means I'm just realistic See, these are lessons that you learn in life / And we only get one of 'em, hope I'm learning right Yeah, yeah, everything comes with a price / Y'all got no clue what I have sacrificed and lately, I've been thinking

Trauma Say you're there when I feel helpless / If that's true, why don't you help me? / It's my fault, I know I'm selfish / Stand alone, my soul is jealous / It wants love, but I reject it / Trade my joy for my protection Grab my hand, I'm drowning / I feel my heart pounding / Why haven't you found me yet? / I hold you so proudly / Traumas, they surround me / I wish you'd just love me back

#chaos #fav songs #fav lyrics #nf #nf real music #nf music

6 notes · View notes

unapologxtic · 4 years

Photo

LOVELY by Billie Eilish ft. Khalid Isn't it lovely, all alone?

Heart made of glass, my mind of stone.

Tear me to pieces, skin and bone.

Hello, welcome home.

🦋

WRONG SIDE OF HEAVEN by Five Finger Death Punch

I'm not defending, downward descending.

Falling further and further away, getting closer every day.

I'm getting closer every day, to the end. Arms wide open, I stand alone.

I'm no hero and I'm not made of stone.

Right or wrong, I can hardly tell.

I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell.

🦋

LEAVE OUT ALL THE REST by Linkin Park

Don't be afraid. I've taken my beating, I've shared what I've made.

I'm strong on the surface, not all the way through.

I've never been perfect, but neither have you.

So, if you're asking me, I want you to know,

When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done.

Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed, and don't resent me.

And when you're feeling empty, keep me in your memory. Leave out all the rest.

🦋

NUMB by Linkin Park

I'm tired of being what you want me to be.

Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface.

I don't know what you're expecting of me. Can't you see that you're smothering me?

Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control.

'Cause everything that you thought I would be,

has fallen apart right in front of you. I've become so numb, I can't feel you there.

Become so tired, so much more aware.

By becoming this all I want to do,

is be more like me and be less like you.

🦋

HATE MYSELF by NF

Yeah, late nights are the worst for me.

They bring out the worst in me.

Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think. And every mornin' I wake up and feel like I ain't my worth,

'cause I'm at war with peace,

or go to hell, welcome to the corpse of me. Yeah, late nights get the best of me.

They know how to get to me.

Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me,

but I don't wanna die, just wanna get relief.

🦋

PARALYZED by NF

When did I become so numb?

When did I lose myself?

All the words that leave my tongue,

feel like they came from someone else.

I'm paralyzed. Where are my feelings?

I no longer feel things,

I know I should.

I'm paralyzed. Where is the real me?

I'm lost and it kills me inside.

I'm paralyzed.

🦋

TRAUMA by NF

Say you're there when I feel helpless,

if that's true, why don't you help me?

It's my fault, I know I'm selfish.

Stand alone, my soul is jealous.

It wants love, but I reject it. Trade my joy for my protection.

Grab my hand, I'm drowning.

I feel my heart pounding.

Why haven't you found me yet?

🦋

TOO SAD TO CRY by Sasha Sloan

Wasn't raised religious, but I wish that I was.

Havin' nothin' to believe in, has been killin' my buzz. I'm too sad to cry, too high to get up.

Don't even try 'cause I'm scared to fuck up.

Don't like to talk, I just lay in my bed.

Don't even try to go out with my friends.

Lied to my doctor, she knew I was fakin'.

Gave me some pills, but I'm too scared to take 'em.

I try and I try, but I'm too sad to cry.

🦋

GONE TOO SOON by Simple Plan

You were always there, like a shining light.

On my darkest days, you were there to guide me.

Oh, I miss you now. I wish you could see,

just how much your memory, will always mean to me.

In the blink of an eye, I never got to say goodbye. Like a shooting star, flying across the room,

so fast so far, you were gone too soon.

You're a part of me,

and I'll never be the same here without you,

you were gone too soon.

🦋

SOMETHING TO REMIND YOU by Staind

So this is it, I say goodbye,

to this chapter of my ever-changing life.

And there's mistakes, the path is long.

And I'm sure I'll answer for them when I'm gone. So when the day comes and the sun won't touch my face,

tell the ones who cared enough, that I finally left this place. It's been so cold, look at my face,

All the stories it will tell I can't erase.

The road is long, just one more song.

A little something to remind you when I'm gone.

🦋

[ bonus track ]

A CALL TO COURAGE by William Ross

#✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: { p l a y l i s t } *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

1 note · View note