#life is so fucking hard for kids right now

[epickiya722]

I'm gonna be honest, Kusakabe lost like 10 points here with me because of this scene right here.

While I agree that, yes, Sukuna does have some influence to why Yuji is how he is: the capability using techniques and cursed energy.

But that's where it ends. Yuji was able to pick up on things so fast because he applied himself. He did the work. Sukuna ain't do shit to even help Yuji's development. It is still Yuji's body. The body that Sukuna decided wasn't enough strong for him to possess.

Yes, Yuji's muscle memory is why Yuji is able to use Shrine but he, Yuji Itadori, had to use it himself to even get it to work for him.

So what the fuck does Yuji have to thank Sukuna for, even if this said in a sarcastic manner?

Like, last time I checked it wasn't Sukuna who woke Sukuna up. It was Yuji. Last time I checked it wasn't Sukuna who learned Black Flash in moments and now can hit it just on pure instinct. That's Yuji.

Last time I checked, it wasn't Sukuna who taught Yuji how to fight. Yuji was already am expert fighter BEFORE Sukuna even came into the picture.

Yuji is able to use his own version of Shrine AFTER Sukuna left his body. Sukuna used that technique TWICE possessing Yuji. A lot of Yuji's growth actually came AFTER Sukuna left to possess Megumi.

It just feels like Kusakube is giving Sukuna too much credit here to me. Ironic, considering that Sukuna was the one who almost killed him and for that he was like "if the Higher-Ups decide that Yuji should die, then I won't stand in the way of that" like bro... do you got some beef with the kid, too?

Like, no, Yuji does not need to thank Sukuna, the same guy who is adamant with making his life a living hell.

Kusakube just being discouraging here, like quite a lot of adults tend to do with kids. Like he could have brought up but also acknowledge the fact that Yuji does work hard on his own to even use techniques. Yuji is a very ambitious kid. His kindness for others and selfless nature is what truly drives Yuji to be physicly capable to do things.

#see and then yo ass got cut by sukuna ain't that a bitch #i know i seem a little salty but i swear at that moment kusakabe reminded me of a lot of yuji haters #as if the kid didn't APPLY himself to even use techniques #like give him some credit!!! #like how about you NOT do that? #just kiya's thoughts #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk 258 #jjk spoilers #jjk manga spoilers #itadori yuji #yuji itadori #yuuji itadori #itadori yuuji

[luescris]

Okay. *inhales and claps hands together* I just got done finally catching up on things. Spoilers under the cut. :)

my thoughts. Are ALL over the place right now. I have words do describe how absolutely gobsmacked I am, but don't have a planned way to put everything so bare with me. So with that said.

*jumping up and down on my chair* dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons dragons

So many things about dragons holy shit you guys holy shit. Can I say how absolutely GORGEOUS the two teacher dragon designs are like on god?? I forget their names but the purple one is so freaking gorgeous and the black one. Is so complicated.

Like in general everything about this season just absolutely screams to me anime like. dude??? When they showed the Five in their prison thing??? That was some freaking anime shit right there. Literally had like flashbacks to that one dangerous group in Naruto that had nine people in it but this was five but s t i l l

There were so many shots where I wanted to take screenshots because oh my god they were so pretty but Netflix doesn't allow that (fuck Netflix for that personally) but dude the Fighting too?? The animation and lighting and lore and story building and ho ug h/pos

Also holy shit I'm so glad that Jay isn't being portrayed as hiding from the others so he doesn't have to do his job like I feared he genuinely forgot and that's so sad because Nya misses the love of her life (SHE ACTIVELY CALLS HIM THAT TOO AAAAA) and the fact that Lloyd got panic attacks??? And those visions??? And holy shit Kai???????

The amount of dragon lore we are FINALLY getting is so much and so sudden it's hurting my brain but I am not at all complaining right now this was the level of story telling that I absolutely adore it's so full of stuff and it's a goddamned lego show. Is it just me or did they seriously up the anti after Monkie Kid cuz you guys I can't I just can't/pos

Never expected Bonzel to be important but I'm not complaining. Cole has a boyfriend finally. The fucking. Council of the Source Dragons or whatever hovering over Lloyd like that oh man oh boy

And the reveal that Roz (Rahz??) and his "master" is only doing this just for some kinda tournament they keep loosing against the Source Dragons?? Talk about a whole new level of petty what the hell dawg that's. Kind of a little hilarious even ngl

Dude I can't wait for more I literally can't wait I'm vibrating so hard right now and still have endless questions this could go anywhere

I was legit glued to the screen the entire time I was watching like on the edge of my seat the whole time, I thought things would get worse or something but it was just all so intense

And also where the hell is Wu is he actually dead this time??? Is that his ghost????? And where in the world is Pixal??? Zane misses his gf :(((

#lego ninjago #ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #dragons rising #lego #it is super late at night like midnight for me rn but bro my head was buzzing #someone help aaaaaa #luescris

[mojoflower]

Mojo-furen? I don’t suppose you’d happen to have any gift for composing old-school country music? I ask because between COVID, neurotype issues, a chronically ill son, abused (and chronically ill) nieces, the house teeming with kids like a Snuffy Smith comic, remodeling, ongoing U.S. political malevolence, fandom drama, and a dead possum under the patio, life has sure been providing you with fucktons of raw material.

No, no, I don't -- and that's truly a tragic oversight, because I'm sure my song of woe would be MAGNIFICENT. An instant and catchy hit.

I am just now coming out the other side of covid, along with my husband and son; our dishwasher has been broken this whole time which is just, the worst; I cut off all my hair and now I have a chronic phantom-ponytail headache that hasn't gone away in 2 weeks (isn't that insane???); my nieces have been stuffing the cum-blankets in the washing machine before they leave in the hopes I won't notice (bless 'em); I am bleeding from places I haven't bled from in over 5 years thanks to menopause; I can't have anyone over to fill the possum void until we're healthy. And we're not even going to mention all the weeds and overgrowth in the yard, because with all the rain, the growing season just won't stop (and neither will the heat and humidity).

Mr. Mojo just got a new slide for his resonator guitar. That seems like the perfect base. I'll work on him for some lyrics ;)

(I'm feeling a little more human today, after a full week of misery. Maybe life is worthwhile after all. Thank you for the laugh, my friend!)

*I can't taste salt or sugar right now... but you know what I can taste, with exquisite clarity, in all its full and robust nuance? Peas. And onions. Yep. Those are the only two things. The peas are alright, a bright little surprise. The chili we had last night tasted of nothing but onion, and that was... not so nice. I really hope taste comes back soon.*

#mojo's life #covid in the house #which was nerve wracking but apparently we're all pulling through okay #even spleen-less high blood pressure and immune compromised as we are altogether #thank fucking god #mojo muses #we don't even have cute possums to watch anymore #we'll have to turn the poor nieces away this weekend #even though it's Younger's birthday and a 3-day weekend #b/c poor Mr. Mojo is going to have a legit nervous breakdown #last week he actually scheduled off for his mental health #and wound up dog-sick instead #he's gonna lose it #also Elder niece has a friend who killed himself on Friday #so she's very rattled #but we finally have a court date for them! #September 22nd #and hopefully at least the emotional drain of not knowing what their mother is going to do will be gone after that #life is so fucking hard for kids right now #i try to stay patient with the antis for this reason #we all know that most of them will grow out of it but right now they need to rage and need some order in their worlds

[just-rogi]

.

#like I’m sorry #I love my best friend so so so much and she’s perfect and kind and has gone above and beyond to be rational and to be there for me #and I get it she’s an autistic woman and has faced adversity and has had to go on medical leave and that’s hard #and I’m not being dismissive of her struggles #but it makes me so angry because her parents unconditionally love her and her siblings and have always made her feel that way #and has never worried about money as a kid #and yeah her relationship with her parents isn’t perfect of course #but she literally cannot understand domestic violence beyond just reading about it in a book #like she did everything she can to understand and relate #but sometimes I want to scream because I feel so alone #because no one in my life fucking understands why I’m the way I am #and I’ve been struggling the past two months really badly with coping #I’ve had to go to the doctor to ask about PTSD and not like the tik tok OWO kind #but the I was in a car crash as a kid with my dad as a drunk driver and I keep getting flashbacks in my daily life to being a small child #that are impacting by daily life and interactions #and like I feel so fucking alone #and to hear from my friends ‘your right this is horrible and toxic but lots of people go through this’ ISNT FUCKING HELPING #I don’t want to hear that it’s normal I want to feel fucking safe in my bedroom without my mother blowing up my phone or calling the cops #I am unwell and I’m so stressed and I’m so sick and I can’t cope with this and none of the therapists I’ve tried to find handle ptsd #especially not therapists of color #I’m angry and I’ve been getting worse over the past two months #and not that it matters but due to ^^^ reasons my birthday has always been insanely fucking bad for me #like depression watch bad. when I turned twenty I was vividly hallucinating while walking around campus for a week straight having #flashbacks in class and I had to be taken out of the auditorium because I was physically unwell and couldn’t stop crying and shaking #and I told my friend I didn’t want to celebrate I just wanted to sit on her couch and not be alone and she fucking ditched me #because an emergency with a different friend came up the night before #like I have a history of suicidal ideation traumatic flashbacks eating disorders and self harm and I’m asking you to be with me on a very #upsetting day and you call me the night before telling me we have to cancel because another friend is having a bigger crisis #and like you don’t even feel a little bad about it?? #I’m just upset and scared and I’ve got a doctors appointment tomorrow and I’m not in reality right now and that’s scary

[solarisgod]

Micah Xenowake 🤝 Me / Astrifer The autistic struggles with seatbelts

#𓁹 ༑ ࿐ྂ ⩇⩇ : ⩇⩇ ⚠︎ [ 𝙴𝚇𝙸(𝚂)𝚃 : 𝙶𝙾𝙳 ] * ‹ THOUGHTS . › #𓁹 ༑ ࿐ྂ ⩇⩇ : ⩇⩇ ⚠︎ [ 𝙴𝚇𝙸(𝚂)𝚃 : 𝙶𝙾𝙳 ] * ‹ MICAH . › #{ ✨ : writing this festival drabble made us learn that yeah... Micah would really hate seatbelts and get uncomfortable real fast with them #[ lmfao ] #[ they're somewhat better with handling them now especially as they have a lot understanding in the security of them ] #[ but when they were a child / when they were Mimi? oh boy ] #[ for real be fighting for their life with them in every ride and sometimes get a meltdown ] #[ it's one of the reasons they had always favored bikes and forced themself to learn how to ride it by themself ] #[ and then with the help of Phoebus who'd try to tell them what to do and Micah at the time would just think ] #[ it's them speaking to themself without realizing ] #[ but yeah seatbelts are not their friends </3 they're RIGHT in their personal space and SO restricting ] #[ AND WHEN THE SEATBELTS GET STUCK????? WHEN IT'S HARD TO GET IT UNSTUCK??? Hell on Earth for Micah Mike and especially Mimi right there ] #[ Micah also often chewing on the seatbelts lmfao dhbdgjnh ] #[ they're a big chewer and biter since they were a kid so ] #[ having the strap that close to them? well of course Mimi would have the urge to bite them and do it ] #[ before they get scolded off not to 'cause of the germs and all ] #[ and then Mimi would get more irritated and it's just. sighs. ] #[ though again Micah is doing somewhat better handling seatbelts ; yet they still experience discomfort here and there ] #[ and yes I can very much relate to all of this when I was a kid sdngjbhgjnkdsmg ] #[ fucking hated them ] #[ you have NO idea how amazed I was when we visited to Vietnam the first time when we were bodily 17 ] #[ and literally 98% of the cars don't have people using seatbelts. even in the city areas. What On Earth. ] #[ me when I see my m*m not using seatbelt and I make myself have it because I love myself and my life more: >:0 ??? ] #[ seatbelts our beloved <3 AND beloathed </3 ]

[alchemist-shizun]

I've come to the realization that I've known about mdzs for about 4 months and so far I've been juggling in my head 3 different songxuexiao fic ideas (ones actually not ship fic only about post canon song lan and inner turmoil which we love) and SOMEHOW all of them involve little kids to a certain degree, either raising them or having a group of little ducklings following u everywhere u go.

This is a first and a pattern I wasn't expecting but I guess I'm welcoming it!

#mdzs #songxuexiao #theres like. modern swtting au where songxiao adopt a kid out of specific circumstances and xue yang shows up after a while #hes late with starbucks /j but their kid parent traps him as well #then the second one a canon divergence from the novel where an issue sees xxc bringing both zichen and a captured xy to baoshan sanren #xy is there mostly bc xingchen wouldnt know what the hell to do with him and theyre on a time limit #HE DOESNT GET TO TAKE HIM TO ANY BIG SECT. when they get there xxc brings sl to his master for treatment for stuff i havent figured out yet #but its BAD #and while xingchen waits he comes back to find xue yang is cornered SURROUNDED BY a myriad of younger disciples #theyre listening intently to the stories he tells and theyre so engaged by the plot and frequently ask questions #and ngl its kind of a cute vision #AS FOR THE LAST more canon compliant fic we have post yi city song lan doing his wandering cultivator life #stumbles upon a street where some older men are picking a fight with a child #the child is definitely a street child. orphan and homeless. he seems too softhearted to defend himself so sl helps! #ofc it doesnt end there Because this is a whole ass child who needs help so he decides to do what he can #little kid is gripping so HARD at his robes too hes terrified. thats also how he finds out in some twisted sick fate that fhe child is.. #missinf a fucking finger. and now he has to resign himself to the idea of being constantly reminded of a certain someone as he raises him #because he WILL raise him its the right thing to do cant trust anyone these days #okay thats all if u read up until here hi im idya come chat with me about yi city arc im friendless /hj #but seriously im so insane about this arc and the characters i need someone to yell with

[slippery-minghus]

thinking about joining a local jiu jitsu class.... i'm SO not athletic and have always had a pretty negative relationship with sports, ambivalent at best, but i WANT TO feel good in my body and maybe even learn how to use it a little better? maybe even get a little stronger?

there's a free "see if it's for you" class i can do tomorrow and the guy was super nice.... so maybe. just maybe an autistic fat queer like myself can go out in the world and get a hobby that involves moving my body. maybe

#i'm excited in the way that comes with things i never follow through on #because fuck what if i don't like it? what if it's hard to integrate into my limited routine even if i do? so i never ever try #but it's a new year and i'm going to be fucking 30 in a month...... and i'm BORED #i'm BORED AS HELL with my life right now!!! #i want to get out and DO THINGS but how the hell do i find things? where do i go? what do i do? #i'm walking distance from this gym (and the bros i've seen leaving are always super nice) #which is a major factor in accessibility for me - i never go to gyms i have to drive to #and it's kinda expensive but.... i can afford it?? #i'd been doing electrolysis for months last year and THAT was definitely more per month than this and i always made ends meet anyway #and i'll have my new HSA for the year that can pay for the first few sessions when i pick back up with it in march #fuck #i'm just so tired of not having enough energy to do the things i want #and there's a good chance making my body stronger will fucking help with that?? #and if these people are even halfway nice enough and i can get in the groove of a routine.... well. maybe i CAN make a change #fucking hell #i need to remind myself a lot that a big part of unmasking and being authentically me is choosing to live and act by my values #and i VALUE being brave and trying new things- not bc i'm forced to. and now that i'm an adult i'll be allowed to quit if i don't like it #my parents aren't forcing me into this. and i'm old enough to make my own choices and stop running from things that remind me of theirs #my strategy has always been Avoid Things My Parents Would've Made Me Do but they're not fucking here?? and trying a physical activity isn't #saying that they were right to push me like that as a kid. i'm old enough to try it on my own terms now. #and that it's a sport doesn't mean its to punish me for having the body and mind that i have. NO it's to grow them. #and i can try and maybe even enjoy and keep with this new thing and not have it become a jail sentence for daring to express interest in it #i can try something else if i don't like it (not a jail sentence) and i can stick with it if i DO like it (also not a jail sentence!!!) #this is not basketball-softball-swimming-gymnastics-band-choir—all of the things i was curious to try as a kid and was forced to keep at #for years as 'punishment' for having expressed curiousity and then finding out it wasn't for me #(and SO much of it wasn't for me bc i was treated exactly the same as i was everywhere else as a kid: shamed and ignored! #NEVER welcomed and taught!!!) well it's DIFFERENT NOW. bc i'm fucking almost 30 DAMMIT #and i'm not in that shithole town anymore where every single person had a chip on their shoulder. like. there's something WRONG in that town #real people are so much nicer. #narrating my life

[sillypilled-friendcel]

"what do you know about drinking" "what do you know about smoking" "what do you know about weed" "what do you know about drugs" you do not know me or my life!!!!!!

#hes always like “what do you know” and then theres a chance hell call me the r slur #and like. i was a smoker for 4 years. i was an alcoholic for 6. #i did speed in muddle school #i smoked pot and had edibles. i had edibles woth my fucking parents. #amd then he complains that i have a vape (bought with my own money!!) and that my parents give me alcohol now (they gave my sisters alcohol #at 13!!) #like he smoked and drank around my suster with cigarettes and drinks my parents bought her #but the moment ma buys me a vaoe with ny own money or i have any experience drinking its awful #i guess its because shes sooo mature and hard working and ik just a disrespectful kid #even tho im a fucking adult now and he never had any right to treat me half the way he did/does #“i treat her like i treat my 10 year old brother” srsly. srsly?? am i 10 now? am i your 10 yr old baby brother now? no. im 18 fucking years #old and i had a totally different life experience than your brother when i was 10 too. we are not related. that is NOT what they meant when #they said to treat me like your younger sister. fuck you. fuck off. #also. im SORRY to your brother if this is how you treat him. but it fucking isnt. your kind to him. you play with him. u fckng LOVE him #while ur an absolute abusive POS towards me #u literally talk shit about me! too my friends!! what? u think my bestie since 6th grade and my cousin ive known all my life are gonna agree #with you? how fucking stupid can u be? #also. u r not the expert on disability just becuz u lost half ur foot and have adhd. ur extremely fucking ableist actually #“i could play sports and so cpukd this guy with a pacemaker i knew so no disability is ever an excuse you can do anything and also im gonna #call you (an autistic person) a retard and say the n word constantly and call children n word lettes!!!! becuz i am a totally normal and wel #well adjusted individual!!!“ #i hope someone hears you say half the shit you say and fucking jumps your ass #and i hope those fuckings pigs u love so much dont do shit for you #you ableist racist transphobic homophobic intersexist bigoted piece of fucking shit #like. if a form of bigotry exjsts he fucking loves it. #god. fuck you. fuck you fuck you. #i hope you fucking kill yourself

[mxgyver]

.

#besties i'm going to be real honest with you #i am Not™️ doing all that great lately and it's been tough #there's a lot going on right now #and the impending dread of going back to work is making it 100000% times worse #it's not the fact that i don't *want* to go back to work #it's the fact i don't want to go back to my specific job #i'm just really struggling overall and it's hard and i feel so fucking stuck #i miss my friends i miss being a kid and not having to worry about the woes of adulthood #why can't life be so simple anymore #i'm sick and tired of feeling like i'm going to emotionally breakdown at any given point during the day!!! #i just want to be held and loved #but putting myself out there is scary!! and terrifying!! #i am fragile and emotional!!! #should this be a conversation with my therapist? yeah #literally told her today how fuckin ironic it is that all my emotional breakdowns happen *after* my therapy session #like last week? fucking broke down hysterically the day after therapy #today? only a few hours lmao #so yeah things are going great 🤪 #anywho... if i seem distant or... off it's not you it's me lmao #sierra speaks #tbd

[todayisafridaynight]

STILL HAVING SUCH A NORMAL ONE ABOUT THAT RGGJO BUT NO Y7JO GETTING REALLY GOOD AT HOUSEWORK I SEE THE VISION… I'm pickin' up what you're puttin' down…

Because I've always wondered how unprepared Jo would've been going into everything. On one hand, he did leave home really young, but since he was working and Ikumi wasn't, one could argue Ikumi would've been the one to handle the housework at least while they were together.

Inversely, I do kiiind of feel like Jo would've done at least Some Things when he could to ease the burden on Ikumi based on his attempt to comfort her at the station. I'm reading way too much into it but it's notable that, despite him definitely being a smoker and them hoping for a miscarriage, the ashtray in their apartment is spotless.

But we only really see his living situation when he's with Ikumi and don't get to see what--if anything--changes when he's on his own, when he has to do everything and not just Some Things. But with regard to food, if you're in survival mode like that, while it is more economical to make food at home, it would make sense that any quality of cooking would be passable. That's not going to fly with a kid who's lived in the lap of luxury his whole life.

So I've always had a lot of feelings about Jo Bettering Himself for Masato's sake (even when Masato isn't necessarily being reasonable) and his overblown neurosis at the prospect of falling short--the post you mentioned in your tags is Exactly It. But, you know, it's cheesy, but I firmly believe he could do whatever he set his mind to, if he can manage to learn Every Martial Art and become a glorified (and very competent) accountant after dropping out of high school.

Also uhhhhhhhh entire post reminded me of this (びら on Pixiv) that's it that's the ask

Ok I'm glad we both caught on to Jo's attempt to console Ikumi and the considerably-clean home. Evidently he was probably self-sufficient enough, but nothing extraordinary- just whatever passed as 'suitable' for them, so it's not as though he's going in totally clueless (but certainly not knowledgeable enough to match Masato's extremely-high standards. Bless Arakawa but he definitely spoiled him a little).

Even if it is a 'cheesy' sentiment, Jo very much has proven that so long as it's for Masato, he's willing to do anything and everything no matter how big (joining the yakuza) or small (probably like. learning how to make quiche)

#snap chats #I WANTED TO REPLY TO THIS LAST NIGHT BUT I GOT A BAD STOMACH BUG EW i'm fine now tho :] #ALSO very happy to see you liked the RGGJo i posted- i definitely hoped you would lkarejlvkej #anyway neglected kids usually pick up on how to do basic things for themselves- some dont obvi #but if jo's ready to lay asphalt on the road by 15 then he probably took like. five minutes to learn how to crack an egg for himself #my favorite Lonely Child's meal growing up was simple yakimeshi- def not a hard meal to make so i imagine he can do at least that #but i can just very clearly see in my brain jo just becoming appalled at his son's standards #cause i mean. on the one hand He's Definitely In Great Hands Now but on the other hand Oh God He Was In REAL Great Hands How The Fuck #ah... now i just really wanna do something with this whole topic it's one of my faves cause it amuses me so much #makes me think plenty.. im sure jo felt a great deal of inadequacy when he finally got to see the full of masato's new life #cause surely- in his eyes- he probably never would have been able to give him such a pleasant life how can he live up to this #just more reason to try harder and assimilate into properly that life right #a small unrelated aside tho now that we're talkin bout ikumi i wonder what she would've done if she did get masato back #i mean they really didnt have means to take care of him but still.. i wonder if she misses him #maybe /i/ care too much about ikumi verALKEJ #FINAL NOTE BACK ON TRACK THOUGH pixiv tells me ive seen this post before but i have no memory of it #but thats EXACTLY the vision and its so cute.. that's how it is in my heart #thanks for writin in and indulgin my goofy ass LMAO

[theresthesnitch]

hey ! when can we expect the next chapter of ignite it has almost been a month

Oh no, I should hurry. If it goes more than a month without an update, it spoils and I have to throw the whole fic out.

#snitch answers asks #hello GOOD MORNING #I just had a shit night of sleep bouncing between my two kids #one of whom is sick #and one of whom thinks they can't sleep without their feet in my ribs #and now I get to go through the distinct pleasure of working from home with a sick kid #for a job that told me yesterday that I'm not working hard enough #and literally the FIRST THING I see other than my alarm #is this fucking ask #the answer is that i don't know #it's not ready now #and I've been trying to write for Jilytober #which is NOT Ignite #but also my entire life is kind of hell right now #so I'm not making progress #I'm going to stop yelling in the tags now #but this is not a nice start to my day #Ignite #ignite asks

[pepprs]

meant to post abt this yesterday and ik it’s kinda mean but i think the counselor i have rn is the worst one ive ever had possibly even worse than (or tied w) the one i had over the summer who kept ending our sessions well before the full hour was up when i was going thru a horrible time and kept spending the sessions mostly talking abt herself and her own problems. actually no now that i write that out she was probably the worst (though she was one of the warmest / nicest and our personalities meshedreally well so i feel bad saying that she was the worst). but the one i have now is so…. lke idk. my experience w the worst counselor made me rly want to work w a clinical intern again bc i wanted someone who would like. actuallytake things seriously and give me the time i was paying for and spend all of it talki ng abt the things i was paying to talk abt and draw from the most recent / cutting edge info instead of entirely personal experience (WHICH AGAIN I FEEL SO BAD ABT BECAUSE. my work is all abt healing each other by sharing things like that and i realt did like her but it just wasn’t appropriate i guess bc it was a counseling relationship!) but my current counselor is so… rigid and restrictive. like i think he is trying too hard to apply what he’s being taught and he seems like nervous and talking out of his ass and he masks that by taking up SO much space and spending like 3 minutes responding to every one minute i talk and literally like strongarmimg the convos and deciding what we’re going to talk about and moving us on to a new topic abruptly before i feel ready to move on and like taking time out of our sessions to do paperwork / admin stuff so he doesn’t forget later (and a lot of the time i think he’s doing it while im talking bc i see his eyes moving around his screen and the light on his face like he’s not even listening to me). and it fucking sucks. i want to crack him like an egg so bad and make him realize it doesn’t have to be this way but i know that’s not my responsibility and in our session last night i basically gave up trying to create enough space for myself and just let him steer things bc i was having side effects and it was just rly unsatisfying

#purrs #i know it is entirely within my right to address these things both for my sake and for his / his future clients but im so scared lol like i #don’t want to tell him he’s doing a bad job and making it hard for me to navigate but literally when you keep steamrolling and silencing me #and cutting me off and forcing me around… yeah. also he has to record our sessions and show them to his profs / supervisors and it’s so like #idk. ive been recorded in sessions before and im totally fine w it but there’s 2 things abt this specific instance of it thst distress and #annoy me. 1) when we sign on to our session he says like 2 things to me then starts the recording and is TOTALLY fake and forcing it like #hello tess welcome to our session and he’ll repeat some of the stuff he said but in a more like.. extensive way so it just feels rly fake #to me lol. WHICH ALSO REMINDS ME 1.5) not related to the recording but every time he asks me questions he asks like… 3 questions but doesn’t #give me space to answer the two like it’s just a bridge for him as he&/ working his way to the thing he actually wants to ask me and i #fucking hate when ppl ask me questions and then answer them themselves or like don’t want to hear the answer. i had 2 profs like that in #brighton and it fucking pissed me offff so being around someone who does that again is rly agitating ik it’s just a nervous habit but yeah. #and 2) i am kinda concerned that none of my counselors profs or supervisors have seemed to call him on how he doesn’t give me space or let #me guide the convo. like idk maybe it’s just that all of my counselors before him were too loose w me but i feel like it s not supposed to f #feel this rigid and i am kinda scared abt the implications of no one actually watching these recordings and see how i try to speak but he #almost always talks over me and i just give up. lol. i like him he’s a nice person i just think he’s nervous and trying too hard and it #would be passable for like.. the little kid clients who usually go there but it doesn’t feel good for me a 23 year old who has had like what #6 counselors before him all of whom gave me space and didn’t shove me around. i miss the counselors i had from oct 2020 - jul 2021 and sept #2021 - feb 2022 they were the best ever and i am inches away from terminating here and just trying to go to wherever they are full time now #and working w them again bc they rly got me and i didn’t know how good i had it lol. i guess i don’t need someone as good anymore bc things #in my life are objectively better than they were during those times but my mental health is still bad so i would uhhh… like someone good #and don’t think that’s too much to ask and need to get it into my head that i CAN ask it. ok rant over #*no one actually watching the recordings has seen / pointed out to him how he steamrolls me etc etc

[hippo-pot]

just learned how cochlear implants work. even more disgusted now with the contingent of people who insist that *not* giving a deaf child a cochlear implant is somehow neglect

“i’m fine with - actually, insistent upon - making permanent medical alterations to children as long as it benefits *me*, not the children themselves” - asshole proverb

#a) you're signing up for at least one CI-related doctor appointment per year for the rest of your life #and constant maintenance (changing batteries etc) #not to mention the huge initial investment of like learning how to interpret the sounds which takes months #b) up until now getting a CI was guaranteed to destroy any residual hearing in one ear #so if you don't like how the CI processes sound uh too bad you already gave up some of the ability to process sound the way you're used to #(i guess there are new surgery techniques now where this isn't necessarily the case) #c) it's surgery! surgery is invasive! period! #imo this is absolutely something where you can wait for the kid to be old enough to decide for themselves #'but it works better on little kids -' literally don't care #adults get them all the time #it's fine #d) being Deaf is not akin to neglect jesus fucking christ #as long as they have consistent access to communication (other people who sign) they're not being neglected #cochlear implants also have really varied results #so it's likely that you'd just be signing the kid up for working really hard reading lips the rest of their life #and doing speech therapy for years #when easy communication via sign is Right There #like why not let your child take it easy????? like let them have a nice easy childhood? #'neglect' my ass #i actually do think it's fine for a parent to decide they want their kid to have a cochlear implant #i mean idk. i'm no expert. just seems fine to me #as long as they also provide an environment of signing so the kid doesn't have to constantly struggle or lack communication #i'm just saying that parents who opt out of CI for their kids should not be demonized

[shenyaanigans]

oh man. oh boy. never in my life have i felt such visceral rage from a shitty news article.

i already yelled on twitter but. i'm yelling again bc no character limit here. for context, an article recently came out from someone who all but accused a trans health center of medical malpractice. she levied serious allegations against the health center, remarking that underage patients were not given enough information to have informed consent and that a number of patients were unhappy with their transition as a result of this or side effects from the drugs. she however, does not give any evidence for this. the basis of her argument are three emails--not even email chains, and most of the emails are her stated opinions--and anecdotal evidence. no paper trail, no documentation, not even more than a single complaint from a parent. she also continuously misgendered patients throughout, calling people "male" or "female" and using the respective pronouns for each despite that most of the cases she presented were from people actively transitioning.

moreover, the scientific evidence she links is... just one man's criticism of a study which he believes is bad. an article which is not peer reviewed, nor has any basis.

and then she has the audacity to call herself queer. progressive. i just. the damage she just did to queer children. the fact that if she WAS concerned about the ethics of her gender clinic, there are MANY places that aren't ANTI TRANS FUCKING LEGISLATURES where she could have gone to!!! if she ACTUALLY WANTS TO PROTECT TRANS KIDS. AND KIDS WHO ARE QUEER OR CONFUSED OR QUESTIONING! THERE ARE FUCKING OPTIONS.

#kat chats #transphobia tw #i'm so angry i'm about to cry. #how dare this woman do this. how DARE she. #the sort of betrayal i feel right now is fucking. god. #it's a sort of reaction i understand; it's always hard when other people you think are your allies turn around and fuck you like this #even if you don't know them #but i am watching trans kids fighting for their fucking lives every day #and you have the audacity to write a shitty article intended to screw them specifically. #it's awful of me but i hope she gets fired #she won't be bc uwu the university can't retaliate #but i have never wished more in my life that she would get fired

[jankwritten]

Actually, I don't think I'll be altering it, necessarily. I think that what I'm going to do is exactly what the show did - some Fuckshit that allows People to Come Back. Because Altea randomly reappears, and I think that Allura's energy should be allowed to come back too. The episode is titled The End Is the Beginning. I call bullshit that the lions just DISAPPEAR. I call bullshit that there is no more need for a defender of the universe. ALL realities were reestablished, and we had SOLID PROOF that all it took was one person, one event, for everything that happened to happen again. There would still be war. There would still be need for something like Voltron, even with the Atlas and the next generation of fighters. Even if it's not the current paladins - Voltron shouldn't just disappear. That ending is dumb, sorry.

That being said - holy shit. I genuinely loved that whole experience and I feel kind of bad for the people who let expectations and silly plot points blot out the whole show for them. Was it dumb at times? Yeah. Do I agree with the way that things went and how it ended? No! But that doesn't mean the show itself sucks or anything like that. This is the whole reason fandom spaces exist, or, part of the reason: so people can love the source material, and change what they don't, if need be. Like, that's the whole reason fanfiction exists IMO.

So, uh, anyway. If anybody has a pirated copy of VLD just lying around and uh....wants to just kick that my way in case it ever gets demolished off the internet.......i would love you forever and ever LMAO.

Wow. Just wow.

#vld #voltron legendary defender #was I crying the whole time I wrote this? yeah lmao #I just can't believe I made it through and that I *liked it* #after all these years!!!! 5 years of hearing to never watch past season 4 to just ditch the show and never watch it!!!! #and it was so fucking good!!!!! #i've literally NEVER been this inspired by something before. i've NEVER fallen this hard into a hyperfixation. #Not even percy jackson or OMGCP or Hockey itself grabbed me like this #I DON'T LIKE SCI FI!!!!!!! #and yet here I am #weeping like a kid over a show everybody told me i was going to hate lmao #it's so ironic to me that my favorite seasons were 5-8. it's SO ironic that my favorite parts were amongst the most hated #(i didn't even REALLY mind the Shiro/Curtis wedding at the end) #i don't know #i think i'm overwhelmed right now and tired and i haven't eaten in days lmao so maybe i'm just Being Weird About This #i feel like my life just got changed and it's silly and dumb but idk. things you love change you. shrug #woof. okay. currently stopping myself from restarting the entire show over which would definitely be a sign of madness #(i'm really considering it guys lmao) #it's even funnier because the fic that I want to read right now would be all about the politics and shit #like I want to read CONTINUATIONS of the show #GAH. #okay i've cried so much i feel sick so i'm gonna go Calm Down Now #thank you guys for sitting through all of my posts