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#I don’t want to hear that it’s normal I want to feel fucking safe in my bedroom without my mother blowing up my phone or calling the cops
just-rogi · 1 month
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#like I’m sorry#I love my best friend so so so much and she’s perfect and kind and has gone above and beyond to be rational and to be there for me#and I get it she’s an autistic woman and has faced adversity and has had to go on medical leave and that’s hard#and I’m not being dismissive of her struggles#but it makes me so angry because her parents unconditionally love her and her siblings and have always made her feel that way#and has never worried about money as a kid#and yeah her relationship with her parents isn’t perfect of course#but she literally cannot understand domestic violence beyond just reading about it in a book#like she did everything she can to understand and relate#but sometimes I want to scream because I feel so alone#because no one in my life fucking understands why I’m the way I am#and I’ve been struggling the past two months really badly with coping#I’ve had to go to the doctor to ask about PTSD and not like the tik tok OWO kind#but the I was in a car crash as a kid with my dad as a drunk driver and I keep getting flashbacks in my daily life to being a small child#that are impacting by daily life and interactions#and like I feel so fucking alone#and to hear from my friends ‘your right this is horrible and toxic but lots of people go through this’ ISNT FUCKING HELPING#I don’t want to hear that it’s normal I want to feel fucking safe in my bedroom without my mother blowing up my phone or calling the cops#I am unwell and I’m so stressed and I’m so sick and I can’t cope with this and none of the therapists I’ve tried to find handle ptsd#especially not therapists of color#I’m angry and I’ve been getting worse over the past two months#and not that it matters but due to ^^^ reasons my birthday has always been insanely fucking bad for me#like depression watch bad. when I turned twenty I was vividly hallucinating while walking around campus for a week straight having#flashbacks in class and I had to be taken out of the auditorium because I was physically unwell and couldn’t stop crying and shaking#and I told my friend I didn’t want to celebrate I just wanted to sit on her couch and not be alone and she fucking ditched me#because an emergency with a different friend came up the night before#like I have a history of suicidal ideation traumatic flashbacks eating disorders and self harm and I’m asking you to be with me on a very#upsetting day and you call me the night before telling me we have to cancel because another friend is having a bigger crisis#and like you don’t even feel a little bad about it??#I’m just upset and scared and I’ve got a doctors appointment tomorrow and I’m not in reality right now and that’s scary
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dragonanon · 3 months
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I love that when I start questioning my child free stance in life, the universe IMMEDIATELY reminds me of why I don’t want kids. 🙃
#i had to do a short visit with a woman today and got to listen to her baby scream for 15 solid minutes#i could BARELY focus on what i was doing because it was so distracting and i couldn’t even put headphones or something in#i ended up ending the appointment sooner than i would’ve liked because i couldn’t take the screaming#but even then they STILL stuck around for several minutes because she apparently simply had to nurse then and there#which normally wouldn’t have been an issue but i’m booked back to back all day today and NEEDED to get the room ready for the appointment#and you can’t really do that when you have someone breastfeeding and a baby daddy who did fuck all to comfort the baby#i will NEVER be cruel to a baby or small child#but i avoid them as much as humanly possible for this VERY reason#loud shrill noises like that fuck with my head#and it’s even worse when i’m in a position where I’m ‘’trapped’’ and can’t just leave and go elsewhere#the amount of rage and irritation i feel when i hear a screaming baby/child is actually scary to me#like i was getting close to snapping and demanding her baby daddy gtfo with the baby so i could actually focus#i could sense that feeling coming though and wanted to avoid letting myself get to that point so I ended the appointment early#it’s this rage that makes me staunchly child free#the LAST thing i want to do is create a life that will have to endure me resenting it for triggering my noise sensitivities#sorry if this comes across as overly critical i swear i don’t truly hate babies and kids#i just get FAR too overwhelmed and overstimulated around them so it’s better for everyone that i enjoy in small doses from a safe distance#i will HAPPILY be the cool aunt that plays video games with you and lets you eat Cheetos for dinner#but i could NEVER be a mother#at least not a GOOD mother that is and that thought distresses me more than the thought of kids themselves 😬#i’m fucked up as it is i couldn’t forgive myself if i fucked up some poor kid too#child free#childfree#sorry for the whole rant/ramble in the tags here#just REALLY needed to vent because that was stressful af for me
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gogogodzilla · 6 months
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day 31, sex pollen
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peeta mellark x reader warnings: nsfw 18+, dubcon, unprotected sex, fuck or die, semi-public sex, slight dirty talk, reader gets sad at the end, multiple orgasms, dedicated to @omgbrcat hope you enjoy it bestie kinktober ☠︎︎ main masterlist ☠︎︎ read on ao3
You didn’t think you’d ever run so fast and wildly in your life. Well, except for last year when you were fighting for your life and running away from everything that was trying to kill you. 
Peeta was a few steps behind you, slower and stumbling a bit due to his prosthetic leg. You threw a glance over your shoulder every few seconds, just to make sure he was still there with you. 
The various leaves and foliage of the jungle hit you as you ran. You hardly even notice as the foliage shifts from a  normal lush green to unnatural shades of pinks, purples, and blues. You did notice, however, when one of the plants shoots a dusty substance directly in your face as you run past it. 
You lost your footing as you attempted to wipe the dust off your face. Peeta came up beside you, arms outstretched and ready to pick you up. 
“Don’t!” you shouted as you slowly stood, slightly relieved that your face didn’t immediately burn off. “I don’t want it to affect you, whatever it is.”
Your ears strained as you tried to discern if the mutts were still on your tail. 
“Do you hear them?” Peeta questioned, echoing your thoughts. “Y’know since you have a Capitol-engineered ear and all.”  
You huffed out a laugh as you listened. You couldn’t hear the familiar rustle of leaves, and you relaxed slightly. You knew never to get too comfortable in the arena, but your lungs were burning and you needed to get this stuff off your face. 
“Do you still have the spile?” you asked, attempting to avoid the way your body felt like it was on fire and your heart was pounding in your chest. 
“Yeah,” he breathed, as he began to hammer it into the trunk of a nearby tree. You prayed that the trees wouldn’t be as hazardous as whatever was covering your face. You watched as he stuck a finger under the liquid flowing out of the spile, checking to make sure it was safe. 
He wrapped his hand around your elbow and it felt like fire bloomed under his touch. He was gentle as always as he guided your face under the water. You dragged your hands over your face as you washed off the dusty substance that had covered it. You attempted to rid yourself of the inferno burning under your skin. 
Your cheeks flushed as you pulled away from the stream of water. Peeta’s touch was fleeting but your entire body ached for him. It was a strange feeling, unlike anything you’d ever felt before. 
Your heartbeat pounded in your chest with every shaky breath you took. You hunched over, attempting to calm yourself. A thin sheen of sweat begins to cover your skin, and your eyebrows furrowed in something akin to pain. 
You heard Peeta call your name, but the only thing you could get out was a whimper. He was on you within seconds, gripping your shoulders and shaking you slightly. You scrambled out of his touch, thinking clearly enough to know that you needed to get away from him. 
“What’s wrong?” he questioned, voice desperate and eyes frantically searching over your form. You hurriedly crawled away from him. 
You shook your head, as you pressed your back against a tree. “I— I don’t know. I feel hot,” you breathed, conflicted between clenching your thighs together and spreading them for him. 
 Peeta kneeled in front of you, eyes soft, “How can I help?” 
You remembered before you’d entered your first Games together how he didn’t want the Game to change him. You were thankful that he was still the same sweet boy you entered the arena with. He was different in some ways, of course. No one left the arena unscathed, but who he was at his core was unwavering. 
Your vision was becoming hazy, and a dull ache where you’d never felt it before emerged. You let out a low groan as the heat blistering down to your bones becomes almost unbearable.
Peeta crawled between your legs and cupped your face. You hissed at his touch, leaning into him. You gripped onto his sides, nails digging into the soft flesh through his suit. His touch felt heavenly against your skin, a ravenous hunger for more filled you to the very brim.
“Touch me,” you whimpered out, tears pricking the corners of your eyes. “Please, Peeta.”
He swiped a thumb across your cheek, and your grip on his tightened. You tugged him closer, your limbs seeming to move on their own. You made a small, strangled sound in the back of your throat. 
Peeta’s lips were hesitant against yours as he kissed you. He was always so gentle with you, never wanting to cross a line. You moaned against him, and swiped your tongue across his bottom lip, desperate to taste him. 
You wrapped your arms around his back and clawed at the zipper to his suit, tugging it down as much as you could. He sucked in a breath as you yanked his suit off of his shoulders, practically manhandling him. You were giving the Capitol exactly what they wanted, but you didn’t care. 
The ache deep between your legs was growing with every moment, and your body temperature rose along with it. Your kisses increased in desperation until you were pleading against Peeta’s lips and writhing against him. 
“It’s okay,” Peeta soothed, reaching behind you to unzip your suit. “I’ll help, it’s okay.” 
You hurriedly peeled your suit off your shoulders, letting out a sigh as Peeta’s fingers trailed over the newly exposed skin. Your cheeks flushed as he leaned down to press open-mouthed kisses against the column of your neck and your chest. 
You ran your hands over the smooth expanse of his chest, the feeling doing little to quell the electricity crackling under your skin. His tongue circled your nipple, eliciting a breathy whine from you. 
You raked your hands through the hair at the nape of his tugged and tugged on the strands. A groan vibrated in his throat, and his hands splayed against your ribcage. 
“Peeta,” you whined as he kneaded your other breast and you clenched your thighs around him. 
You couldn’t stand not having him for a second longer and you hooked your arms under his, gripping him tightly as you rolled to the side. You landed on top of him, straddling him. You panted as you finally got a good look at him. His eyes were half-lidded and he was flushed and breathing heavily. His pupils were blown wide as he looked up at you. 
Your tongue darted out to wet your lips, “Is it getting to you, too?” 
He nodded, attempting to steady his breathing. You stood and shimmied out of your suit, tossing it to the side. You leaned down to hook your fingers into the waistband of Peeta’s suit and looked up at him through your lashes. The quick dip of his head was all you needed, and you were practically ripping his suit off of him. It wasn’t the first time you’d taken off Peeta’s pants, but you flushed all the same. You were too focused on saving his life last time to worry about being embarrassed. 
You were back on him faster than your hazy mind could process, your hips moving on their own accord as you ground against his thigh. His length pressed against your belly, warm and unbelievably hard, as you dragged your hips against him. 
You reached down and stroked him in time with each rut of your hips. He let out a mix between a whimper and a sigh as you did. Your movements quickened, and you buried your face in the crook of Peeta’s neck. With each twist of your wrist around his cock, he was letting out noises that had heat pooling in your belly. His tip was leaking, and you loved the sound he made when you ran your thumb over it. 
Peeta’s fingertips dug into the plush of your hips so hard you didn’t doubt that he’d leave bruises. The animalistic part of you that had taken control wanted him to mark you in every way possible. Your slick had begun to cover Peeta’s thigh, allowing you to easily grind against him.
Your strokes became more erratic as your pace against Peeta’s cock increased. You both were so wound tight you might burst. You’d never been so aware of your pulse pounding in your ears, and you came with a strangled cry. Tears coated your cheeks as warmth encased your entire being and you spasmed against Peeta. You had a moment of respite as you thought the plant’s effects had subsided, but the drive to ravish him returned with a vengeance. 
He followed you off the precipice soon after you calmed down, back arched and head thrown back as his release covered your knuckles. The fog that surrounded your head cleared just enough for you to realize just how pretty Peeta looked like this. If you were going to die, you didn’t think you’d get a better view. 
Your pace slowed but Peeta was still hard in your hand. The boiling heat still lingered under your skin, and your pulse quickened. You wondered if that was the Capitol’s goal; to make you so fucked out you succumb to exhaustion or burn you from the inside out. 
Peeta looked utterly exhausted and a coil of guilt settled in the pit of your stomach. 
“Just one more, please,” you begged, trailing kisses down his neck. He nodded against you, and you could’ve cried from the relief that washed over you.
You lifted your hips and aligned the tip of his cock with your entrance, gasping at the sensation. Peeta’s hips bucked up unconsciously, shoving himself deeper inside you. A pained hiss left you, and Peeta cried out a thousand apologies, his iron grip returning to your hips once more. 
“I’m sorry. You’re just— Fuck… So— tight,” he babbled out, brown eyes glazing over. You pressed a featherlight kiss against his cheek, thoughts too consumed with his cock inside you to reassure him properly. You slowly lowered yourself onto him, sighing when your hips were finally flush. Peeta had his eyes screwed shut, gritting his jaw in thinly veiled restraint. 
Your hands settled on his shoulders as you began to rock your hips against his. Peeta rested his head against the tree as you rode him, releasing little pants and moans with every thrust of your hips. 
With each moment that passed your movements became more erratic, desperate to reach your peak once again. Peeta’s hands frantically roamed your body, grasping and kneading whatever inch of skin he could reach. 
He reached a hand between the two of you and drew hurried circles around your clit. He lifted his hips to meet yours, jutting himself deeper inside you. The sounds of skin slapping against skin filled your ears, and you prayed you were the only ones trapped in this portion of the arena. 
It took no time for your release to hit you, practically knocking the wind out of you as you clenched around Peeta’s cock. Your vision went hazy, and for a moment you feared you’d pass out. 
Peeta finished with a few more rolls of your hips against his. He filled you to the brim, his release hot and steady coated your walls. 
Your vision cleared as you came down from your high. The fire within you had finally dissipated, and you breathed a sigh of relief. You felt exhaustion consume you as you slumped against Peeta. 
“I’m sorry,” you slurred out, clinging onto Peeta like your life depended on it. Your face screwed up and you felt your throat tightening. 
“It’s okay. You’re okay,” he rushed out, running his hands over your body, attempting to soothe you as quiet sobs wracked your body. Your last thought before drowsiness overtook you was of how much you didn’t deserve Peeta Mellark. 
Your heart pounded as you awoke, adrenaline spiking as you heard someone calling your name. You jumped to your feet, eyes frantically searching your surroundings. Your movements caused Peeta to stir and his eyes shot open, the same panic gracing his features. 
You tugged on your suit, grimacing at the dried cum that covered your inner thighs. You tossed Peeta his suit and pulled him to his feet. You didn’t know how long you’d been out, and the thought turned your stomach. Someone could’ve easily come along and killed you both. 
You grabbed your weapon while Peeta removed the spile from the tree. 
“Let’s just hope our sponsors enjoyed the show,” you joked, immediately cringing as soon as the words left your mouth. 
The corners of Peeta’s mouth quirked up, “I’m sure they did.”
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f1goat · 23 days
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more than friends ; lando norris + part ten
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In which your best friend is going to help you to gain more sexual experience and say goodbye to your insecurities, but he's quick to discover that he never wants to share you and your new experiences with others - the only problem being, him having to confess his feelings.
masterlist - playlist
fem!y/n x lando norris
warnings: smut with a plot. minors dni! probably grammar or spelling errors due to english not being my first language.
requested: yes, based on this request: something with a driver sister that’s still a virgin & lando (her bestfriend) suggests to teach her things
part one / part two / part three / part four / part five / part six / part seven / part eight / part nine
“You’re insane,” Oscar tells his teammate when he sees you walking towards Lando and him. “Actually insane,” he mutters when he gets an even closer look on you. When you feel Oscar his eyes on you, you know for sure what he’s looking at. He looks at the same thing that everyone else is looking at when they see you. Lando his love bites. Why did he even leave them so out in the open? You tried to cover them up with make up, but it didn’t work. If you brought a turtle neck with you, you would have worn it for sure right now. But since you’re in another hot country, you only have summer clothes with low necklines. Which means that everyone can see the marks on your skin that Lando made two days earlier. You curse him for leaving them on this place, but you continue to walk closer to him. 
“Insane?” Lando asks Oscar. He notices the way his teammate looks at you. 
“Is this to show Pierre that she’s taken or something stupid like that?” Oscar continues to scold Lando. He didn’t even think about it like that, but now that he does… The hickeys might help with Pierre backing off a bit. “You can’t claim something you don’t own,” Oscar sighs, “just remember that before you do more stupid shit.”
Before Lando can say anything to Oscar, you’re already standing in front of them. He notices the way you try to cover the hickeys with you hair, but he stills sees the red love bites. Now that he thinks about it, let everyone see them - maybe then everyone will figure out that you belong to him. 
“Hey baby,” Lando greets you.
“Don’t baby me, I’m mad at you,” you sigh, “I should have brought a turtleneck with me. Everyone is looking at me.”
“Sorry,” Lando jokes. He watches around you and notices the way people are watching at you. You’re right. Everyone is paying attention to you. He notices some press workers as well. Normally the track isn’t busy on Wednesdays, but today seems different. He hears cameras clicking. Are people taking pictures of you? He starts to stress a bit. Lando pulls you closer to himself and drapes his arm around your shoulder, using it to hide your hickeys a bit more. 
“I might have a crewneck sweater laying here somewhere,” Lando tells you. 
You nod at Lando. Together you walk inside the McLaren motorhome. You notice the way even some mechanics are watching you. You’re going to kill Lando. This is all his fault. Lando doesn’t pay attention to them, he takes your hand and pulls you with him the his drivers room. There you finally get his sweater. You’re quick to put it on. Happily you watch in the mirror, almost no love bite is still visible now. The sweater is way too hot, but you rather become sweaty then have people look at you for the whole day. You can only hope they’ll fade away quickly. In silence the two of you walk back to the track. 
Together with Lando you’re strolling on the track. It’s relaxing to walk around with him like this. Lando is holding your hand. You like the peaceful silence between you two right now. It feels comfortable and relaxing. You realize that you don’t feel like this around other people. Lando has always been your safe place. It reminds you about how special things are between Lando and you, but it reminds you most about how you can’t fuck things up between you two. 
Your feelings are already coming in the way. They have always done, but since you have been experiencing the sexual stuff with him it has become worse. Maybe it’s because you have a tiny bit of hope that Lando also feels something for you. It’s the first time you have ever had that hope. Partly because of his jealousy, that must mean something right? But still, you wonder if it’s worth it if it can also ruin your friendship? What if you’re wrong and Lando doesn’t feel the same? 
When Lando grabs your hand, he pulls you out of your thoughts. “Don’t look to fast,” he says, “but I think Pierre is coming this way.” Fuck. You’re not in the mood for that. Slowly you watch around you, it doesn’t take you long to see that Lando is right. Pierre is walking towards the two of you. In only a couple seconds he’s standing in front of you. 
“You could have told me,” Pierre says to Lando without any context. 
“Told you what?” Lando asks confused. 
“Come on,” Pierre sighs, “All the gossip accounts are full with it. The two of you are dating.”
“Sorry?” You ask confused, “Are gossip accounts stating that we’re dating?”
“Yes!”
You let out a sigh. Gossip accounts have always been a thing. They always suspect that there’s something going on between Lando and you, but they never had any proof. You drop Lando his hand. This is a mess. You don’t even want to see your socials right now, they’re probably full with hate. Fuck. 
“Since when do you believe gossip accounts?” Lando asks Pierre.
“Since she has been spotted with hickeys all over her and she’s now wearing one of your crewneck sweaters,” Pierre answers annoyed, “I don’t get it why you didn’t tell me. I made a fool of myself by asking her on a date. You could have said something.”
“I told you that you weren’t her type.”
Lando continues to argue with Pierre. You on the other hand can only wonder when the gossip accounts are going to share the pictures of your love bites. Fuck, what are ‘fans’ going to do then? You grab your phone and look at the way your notifications are already blowing up. Reactions keep coming, you read a couple of them. Most of them are calling you a slut. Whenever you see a nice one, there are more negative ones beneath them. You search on a gossip page, wondering what they already posted. Then you see one of the pictures.
It’s you in your former outfit. The hickeys on your neck and collar are hard to miss. Suddenly you start to feel watched. It feels like everyone around you is looking at you. 
“You should have told me that you two are dating,” Pierre scoffs angrily.
“We’re not,” you sigh. It’s the first time that you’re saying something again. “And even if we were, it’s none of your business. Can you take me back to the motorhome Lando?”
When you’re finally back in Lando his drivers room, you grab your phone again. Your notifications are blowing up. It seems like everyone is talking about Lando and you dating. You have never gotten this many comments under a Instagram post, you’re above a thousand now on your most recent post. You try to read as many as you can, but a lot of them are the same. People are calling you a slut for “parading” around the track with the hickeys. Others are saying that Lando deserves better, that you’re only with him for the fame. As if you weren’t with him before he even started in Formula One. Sometimes you read a positive comment. Some people seem to like it that Lando and you are “finally” together, not that it’s true. Some people are even reacting about the true love between you two. All of it makes you sad. You don’t even notice the tears that are falling down on your cheeks, until Lando wipes a couple of them away.
Lando doesn’t know how to act. He takes you into his arms and tries to comfort you as much as he can manage. He doesn’t know what is wrong, but he can guess. When Pierre said something about the gossip accounts, he didn’t even think about the consequences for you from those accounts, but now he remembers. Every time they post about you, your notifications are blowing up. People know how to find your Instagram and how to leave horrible comments. He doesn’t even want to read it. 
“Nothing of what they’re saying is true babygirl,” Lando shushes. You let out a soft sob. “Everyone thinks I’m a slut,” you tell him, “or a gold digger or just an awful person.”
“You’re not.” He presses a soft kiss on your forehead. “You’re the most wonderful person I know,” he continues, “So stop letting this get to you babygirl, they’re not worth it.” 
“Lan?” You ask softly. He nods and waits for you to continue. “This is all your fault,” you softly joke, “fucking hickeys.” Lando lets out a soft laugh. 
+++
“Fuck, babygirl,” Lando grunts when you lower your body onto his. He feels himself enter you. “You feel so fucking good.”
You’re sitting on top of Lando. He’s not even more then ten minutes back from the second free practice. It didn’t went like he wanted to. When he got out of the car, he let everyone know about that. The moment he started to scold multiple mechanics you were quick to intervene. Normally you don’t, but Lando kept going on and on. It was getting too much. He really lost his temper this time. You wonder why, normally he’s rather patient. 
Slowly you move your body on top of Lando. This position makes you feel more fulled up then the first time. With slow movements you fuck him. When you let out a soft moan, Lando shows you a small smile. His hands are all over your body. He kneads your boobs while pressing his lips against your collarbone. Softly placing kisses all over it. 
You didn’t know what got into you when you grabbed Lando his hand while he acted rude to his team. He gave you a surprised look and even shut his mouth for a bit. When you stood on your toes to reach his ear, he turned all of his attention to you. “If you stop whining,” you whisper, “I’ll have sex with you in your drivers room.” Lando shut in within seconds. He even apologized to his crew before taking your hand and almost running towards his drivers room with you. Undressing you as soon as he turned the door behind him. When your dress was all up and his pants were down and he was ready to enter you, you surprised him one more time. “I want to be on top.”
Lando can’t stop himself from letting out multiple moans when you increase your pace. Faster then before you move yourself on top of him. He grabs your neck and moves your face closer towards himself so he can kiss you properly. His hands are still busy kneading your boobs. He gives your nipples a bit more attention by softly pulling on them. 
“Fuck Lan,” you whine when he pulls back from the kiss. He chuckles and let his hands slide down on your body. His lips are attached to your neck. “No more visible marks,” you instruct half jokingly, half serous. Lando grunts but moves his mouth a bit lower, making sure his new marks can be covered with summer clothes. 
You’re surprised when you feel Lando put his finger on your clitoris. He shows you a small smile when he notices your surprised look. Slowly he traces circles on the sensitive bud, making you feel all kind of things. You let out a loud moan. Lando adds a bit more pressure. You try to increase your pace as well, but you start to feel worn out. Lando helps you, effortless he moves himself inside of you. Picking up a fast pace. It causes you to let out more moans. 
“Fucking insane how good you feel,” Lando groans. He feels himself coming close to his orgasm, but he wants to feel you cum on his dick first. He increases his pace on both fucking you as on playing with your sensitive bud. Stimulating you as much as he can. 
“Are you going to cum for me?” Lando asks you, “Let me feel how good it feels to have your pussy clenching around my cock.” You don’t react verbally. Lando keeps talking dirty to you. “So fucking tight.” “Such a good girl.” 
“I’m close Lan,” you suddenly tell him, “Can I cum?”
Lando increases his pace as much as he can. “Please do babygirl,” he tells you. When he feels your pussy clenching around his cock, he lets go as well. When his cum enters your body, Lando tells you one more thing. “My good girl.” It makes you all flustered. 
+++
Days are going by quickly. Before you know it, it’s already Sunday - meaning it’s race day again. This is the last race of the triple header, meaning that after this Lando and you will go back home. You don’t know how to feel about that. Last weeks you have spent al your time with Lando, sleeping in his hotel rooms and being together almost every moment of the day. It has been extremely nice. You like living with Lando like this. That’s maybe why you don’t like going back home tomorrow. Then you’ll be alone in your own apartment again, without Lando laying next to you in the bed every night. 
“Good luck kiss?” Lando asks you. He holds his helmet. He’s almost ready to get into his car and to start with the race. You show him a small nod and press the standard ‘good luck kiss’ against his cheek. Like you always do when you’re with him at races. “Don’t know if that will bring me enough luck,” Lando jokes. 
You show Lando a confused look. What does he mean? Before you can ask about it, Lando presses his lips on your for a small moment of time. It can’t have lasted longer then a second, but it was long enough to wake up the butterflies in your stomach. You look around you. Did anyone see it? It can’t be. You don’t more negative comments on your socials. Now that you think about it, what did just happen? Since when is Lando kissing you in public places? 
Lando doesn’t say anything else, he walks off to his car. He can only think about what he just did. He realizes that if anyone saw, it will mean that you’ll get more hate. Maybe he should say something about it on his socials? He needs some help from his PR team. He wonders what’s going on with him. He just kissed you in a public place, practically on his work, where everyone could see. Since when are you doing that? If someone saw and shares it, the madhouse will be complete. He wonders what would happen if he would date you and share it online. People have been shipping the two of you for a long time, so some of them might be happy. But there are always so many haters. When he takes place in his car, he looks at the Alpine motorhome. He remembers Pierre his statements from earlier this week. Finally someone who understands that you’re not for him to take. 
He really should solve this problem and make you his. 
Then he remembers something else. Didn’t you have a date planned with some guy for after the triple header? He tries to forgot about it and focus on the upcoming race, but that seems to be hard form him right now. He can’t stop thinking about the guy who’s taking you on a date. Who is it? Will you fall in love with him? When he lines up to the start, he’s still thinking about the guy you’re going on a date with. 
You watch Lando race. All of your focus is on him, nothing new now that you think about it. Only this time it doesn’t feel like it normally does. It’s because of some weird feeling that you can’t seem to shake off. It almost feels like something is going to happen. Something bad. It feels off. You don’t know why you’re thinking like this right now, but you can’t seem to stop. You can’t take your eyes off the screen which shows Lando his car all the time. Multiple mechanics are watching the fight for second place, but you can only focus on Lando. Even the way he races feels off. It’s hard to say without any knowledge about it, but he almost seems unfocused. 
Then you see the reason behind your feeling. Lando misses his braking point. Within seconds he’s spinning into the wall. You let out a loud scream when it happens. Quickly you stand up and walk closer to the screen. All the attention of everyone in the motorhome is on the screen as well now. Everyone is waiting for Lando to say something. To let them know he’s okay. 
You need to hear Lando say something. You need to know if he’s okay. The crash didn’t look massive, but still bad. It doesn’t take long for a safety car to show up on the grid, leading the drivers. Many drivers are coming into the pit to change their tires. You don’t notice any of it, you just keep waiting for Lando to say something. The stress doesn’t leave your body. 
“I’m ok.”
You feel how you let out a lot of air at once with a relieved sigh. Thank god, Lando is okay. You watch how he climbs out of his car. It seems like he has no trouble with walking away from the track to get back to the motorhome. Within a couple minutes you see Lando showing up at the motorhome. The medical team is following him inside, you hear some talks about medical checks but you don’t follow it. All of your attention is on Lando. 
While walking to Lando you almost trip over your own feet. “Fuck Lan,” you stammer while rushing yourself into his arms. Lando doesn’t react verbally, he just wraps his arms around your body and holds you closely to himself. You don’t even notice that you’re making his race suit wet with your tears. “Are you hurt?” You ask him. 
“We would have known if he joined us for his medical checks,” someone tells you with an annoyed tone in her voice. You let go of Lando and look around you, only to see that the whole medical team is gathered around you. 
“You didn’t have your check up yet?” You ask Lando confused. “No,” he replies. “Fucking hell Lan,” you mutter, “Go with them you idiot.” Lando shows you a boyish grin, “Sorry babygirl, I wanted to see you first.” 
Lando and you are rejoined only a small hour later. He is still laying in a hospital bed. The medical team decided that he needed some rest before getting back out of there. The crash wasn’t hard and didn’t left much damage across for a few bruises and painful spots on his body. They gave him some pain medication, which causes him to feel a bit loopy. You’re sitting next to him, waiting until he wakes up. You have seen him on medication like this before, the Grand Prix in Las Vegas showed you how loopy and careless Lando can act with medication like this. You wonder how he will act this time. 
When Lando wakes up, he’s happy to see sitting right next to him. He is quick to remember the way he crashed during the race. He feels ashamed when he realizes why he lost his concentration and how it ended his race, such a rookie mistake. And probably easy to fix if he finally gets the nerve to tell you about his feelings. He feels himself getting mad at himself. Before he can think about it any longer you’re already taking to him. 
“How are you feeling Lan?” You ask him.
“Not great,” Lando sighs honestly.
“You scared the shit out of me,” you confess, “what happened?”
He can’t exactly tell you that he couldn’t stop thinking about you and the date you’re going on as soon you’re back in Monaco. That would be stupid. Although it is the real reason. Lando wants to make up some sort of excuse, but he is already talking again. Those fucking pain meds. 
“Couldn’t focus,” he confesses, “I kept thinking about something.” He can barely stop himself on time from telling you that he was thinking about you and your date. 
“About what?” You ask confused. 
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Lando quickly says before he can say anything stupid again. He needs to stop himself from confessing even more. “Okay Lan,” you softly say. You grab his hand and draw some figures on it. There’s a comfortable silence between you two. Lando enjoys your soft touches on your hand. He feels himself getting calm and almost falling asleep again. But right before he falls asleep, he can’t stop himself from saying something stupid again. He cam blame the pain meds, but he knows that he means every word.
“Babygirl?” He asks. “Yeah Lan?”
“Please don’t get a boyfriend,” he says. “And please don’t go on a date when you’re back in Monaco with anyone else then me.”
Fuck. Did he really just say that? How on earth will he fix this? Lando closes his eyes and tries to fall asleep instead of thinking what he just did. Lando doesn’t notice the way you have a small smile laying on your lips and how good you feel because of his words. 
“I already cancelled that date,” you confess to Lando, “After we fucked I decided that it might be a better idea to practice a bit more.” 
Lando opens his eyes and shows you a happy grin. “I don’t think you need a lot of practice,” he says, “but I’m happy to help.”
“That’s a deal.”
“My good girl,” Lando mutters before falling asleep.
part eleven
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gus-the-goldfish · 8 months
Text
Headcanon: riding them the first time
A/N; No one asked for this, but i, once again, fell into the lotr/hobbit hole. So there is that. Now I will probably disappear for another year before posting any stories. Enjoy!
Rating: 18+ minors avert your eyes
Warnings: smut!, a tiny bit of degradation
Characters involved: Kili, Fili, Thranduil
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Kili:
The first time you literally flipped him over to be on top, his eyebrows shot up so high on his forehead you were worried they would never return to normal
Boy was he surprised
He is usually a talker, loves to tease you in and outside of the bedroom but at that moment, he was speechless
For a few seconds he just stared at you, not knowing what the fuck he was supposed to do now since he was usually the one on top
You started out slow , just grinding against him which had him gripping your hips so hard you were sure there would be bruises
Honestly he wouldn’t be able to stop moaning because it felt so fucking good
And the way you look, fuck. Enjoying yourself, literally using him for your own pleasure
From that day on, he was the one almost begging you to ride him
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Fili:
Fili, like his brother, was surprised to have you on top of him but he recovered quickly and had a shit eating grin plastered on his face “Alright then...”
He would quiet literally lean back and enjoy the show, giving you some encouraging words along the way
“Doing so good, love. Keep going.”
“That’s it, make yourself cum.”
Would shamelessly grab, kiss, bite and lick any inch of skin he could find
Grabs your hips to keep you still once he noticed you’re close, just to hear you whimper and beg him to let you cum
“Not yet, love. You got to work for it.”
When he feels like you deserve to cum, he would just grab the back of your neck and pull you down to him before fucking up into you with a intensity that lets you see stars
Safe to say its his new favorite position
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Thranduil:
He felt insulted the first time you mentioned your desire to be on top for once
Thranduil is a king. A king has to be in control
He agreed to try it after lots of convincing (and to shut you up)
Once you finally settled on top of him, with his cock deep inside of you, he had the audacity to look bored. Bored!
Tried really hard to look unaffected when you started to move, but you did notice him licking his lips at the way your boobs bounced right in his face
He kept his hands at his sides, denying you the pleasure of his hands on your body even when you begged him to touch you, to guide you
Would definitely start mocking you when your legs gave out right before your orgasm
“What is it, meleth nin? You wanted to do this on your own, didn’t you?”
“Look at my stupid little girl, cant even ride her king properly.”
Finally had mercy on you when you started to cry from frustration and desperation
“No, no don’t cry now little star. I will show you how it’s done.”
Would fuck and overstimulate you for hours to remind you why he is the one on top
Secretly likes you on top anyway
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chaotic-mystery · 7 months
Note
I have something for a request.
So Joel promised your father he would protect you from the Clickers and other people.
So you and Joel are walking through the forest and you start to annoy him. Because you are constantly asking how long does it take to get to the destination.
Joel had enough so he takes your virginity and your ass virginity roughly. So you shut up.
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pairing: Post Outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
content warnings: DARK CONTENT AHEAD, PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. 18+ only. Non-consensual that turns consensual. You are responsible for what you read. Daddy kink, rough sex, assplay if you close an eye, pet names galore (little one, pet, playtoy, baby girl, Joel refers to himself as daddy, you get the picture.) mean!Joel, Dark!Joel, choking, reader has hair long enough to pull, dirty talk, unprotected p in v, dacryphilia, pull out game strong, this is post outbreak but before Ellie so you know he got that stamina, Joel takes your virginity. LET ME KNOW IF I'VE MISSED ANYTHING. ||word count: 1.9k || follow @chaoticnotifs so you don't miss anything!||
authors note: This is so out of my normal and honestly I hope I did it justice! I know this isn't everyone's thing and that's okay! I personally pictured game Joel but that's just my preference. As always I love you all 🖤
“Will you please shut the fuck up?! All that goddamn talkin’ you’re doin, you’re gonna get us killed, Jesus Christ.” Joel barked as he turned on his heel, his rifle in hand. Joel promised your dad to keep you safe and while he has for a few years, it hasn’t been the easiest thing to do. You talked way too much for Joel’s liking but a promise was a promise.
“I’m just asking how much longer until we get to the tower…fuck me.” You grumble, annoyed at him for being so moody today. You were sweaty and tired, wanting to go back to the QZ in your little apartment you shared with Joel. He was over all your bullshit for today, sick of your smartass mouth just running and running without any repercussions.
“What’d you say t’me, little girl?” He snaps, the rifle falling to his side as his hand wraps around your throat and he pushes you into a tree trunk. The bark was hard against your back and scratched you, but it was nothing compared to the feeling you were having on your windpipe.
“N-nothing, Joel- nothing!” The words barely choked out of you, just enough for him to hear you beg.
“All you’ve been doin’ since we’ve been out here is talkin’ your pretty head off. What did I tell ya not even five minutes ago? Use that big girl voice since you wanna be big and bad.” Joels lips ghosted over the shell of your ear before he presses a rough sloppy kiss on your cheek. This was all so sudden, so new to you. No one has ever touched you like this, especially an older man like Joel. He was aggressive and mean, didn’t care about the fact his grip on your throat was tightening. He wasn’t in the mood to ask if any of this was okay with you, where his hands were quickly traveling to, none of it. Joel wanted to take what he wanted from you without you running your mouth.
A deep grumble erupts from Joel against your face, another sloppy kiss on your cheek while his tongue licks against your flesh. “Say it again, now.”
“I was just asking if we were close to the tower and-d that I was s-sorry-y!” You cried out, squirming under his touch trying to free yourself. With your back squished against the tree, there was nowhere to go. All you could do was plead and beg for him to let go and leave you be.
“What was that last part you’re leavin’ out, sweetheart?” The smirk on his face is so present in his tone you don’t even need to look at him. Joel’s freehand comes up your side, brushing against the bare skin peaking above your jeans. He could feel you trembling with fear and excitement. Joel knew you were still a virgin, he never let you out of his sight and always took the same work shifts as you so he could keep you close.
“I-ah shit- I said fuck me but I didn’t mean it like th-” Joels hand creeps up to your jaw and grabs it roughly, squishing your cheeks together and your eyes met his.
“Don’t care how you meant it sweetheart, planned on doin’ that anyway.” His smirk never faded and he without warning rips your jeans down, your panties tangled in them as the fabric bunches around your knees. The whimper that escaped your lips didn’t phase Joel as his hands wandered up your thighs to your slick covered cunt.
The guttural groan he let out rattled through your bones enough to make a chill run down your spine.
“Fuck are you so wet for, huh little one? Couldn’t control yourself could ya? Probably love the idea of being my playtoy while I take what I want and you’re beggin’ me to quit..but you know daddy won’t do that.” With his hand covering your mouth and squeezing tightly, your pleads were so muffled he could barely make out what you were saying.
Joel unbuckles his belt and pushes his pants to his ankles before he grabs you by the back of your neck and spins you around, forcing you against the tree once more as his hand pushes against the small of your back to make you arch for him. His hand reaches around your hips to dip down between your folds, rubbing harshly on your clit as the head of his cock nudged against your ass cheek.
You tried everything to pry his hand away from your mouth but he only squeezed tighter, growling at your attempts. “Might as well give up now, it’ll go over a lot better for you if you quit fightin’ me, sweet girl.” He mutters in your ear as he starts to ram his cock inside your entrance. He doesn’t let you get adjusted to him at all and the tears fall immediately down your cheeks. You cry out in pain, shoving his hips away from you but he doesn’t stumble back at all.
“Joel ple-ase it h-hurts” you murmur against his palm and he just chuckles as he begins to thrust inside you.
“Shut your fuckin’ mouth before I fill it for you, am I clear? S’okay, you’re just a little virgin, don’t know what you like. I’ll teach you what you like, baby; trust me.” He scolded. It felt as if you were being shredded and ripped apart from the inside out with the way he was carving away at you.
The only manageable response you gave him was a distressed “yes d-addy” which was just enough to make his head toss back while his hips slam into yours so harshly, the faint slapping of your skins echoed around you.
He lets go of the grip he has on your mouth, a string of saliva following from your lips to his palm and he grabs onto your shoulders to keep himself steady. Joel doesn’t dare let you see how much he’s enjoying this; ruining you and taking every bit of last innocence you had. His jaw was clenched tightly to keep his grunts at bay but it was still audible how much he loved feeling you clench around him so tightly, hugging his cock for dear life. Soon enough your pain turned to pleasure and you were fucked out of your mind, gripping onto the tree truck and begging for him not to stop as the pressure built up in your tummy.
“I knew you’d be a tight little virgin but damn sweetheart..” he leans in close and his hand finds its way around your throat once more, yanking you against him, “..you’re gonna be so dickdumb by the time I’m through with you-ughh- you’ll be beggin’ for me to fill you full every goddamn second you’re awake.” Joel’s other hand cups your tit through your thin shirt, kneading away mercilessly as your nipples get stiffer against your bra.
“J-joel please..I..I’m gonna come..” you whine out, body trembling and making it harder to stand up on your wobbling legs. Suddenly your head is being yanked backwards by your hair and Joel’s lustful eyes meet yours, his jaw still clenched tightly.
“Don’t you dare come until I say so. Be a good pet for daddy, mkay? Stay jus’ like that f’me, right there. Oh fuck, baby..” He stops thrusting long enough to put you down on the ground and him right behind you, shoving your face into the dirt with your ass in the air. In no time he finds his rhythm again and gives your ass a firm smack with a chuckle following behind it.
Joel slips the tip of his thumb in his mouth, covering it in spit before he traces over your asshole and goes inside you, groaning loudly as he can feel his cock pumping in and out of you just from having his thumb in your ass.
It’s taking every ounce of control not to come on his cock and disappoint him even more than you already have tonight. With your legs squeezed together as hard as you can, it wasn’t enough to keep your mind off of having the best orgasm you have ever had.
Sure, you touched yourself all the time while Joel was asleep in the next room over back in the apartment, squirming and whimpering like a kitten as your mind wandered to Joel and ran images over your eyes that just made it so easy to come for yourself. This however was not what you imagined Joel would be like. You imagined he’d be sweet, wanting to make your first time feel special and all that stuff you watched in movies before the outbreak. He was none of that.
“You want me to break you in two and just make your world crumble, huh? You filthy little one. You’re my toy now, no one can save you from me.” He spat as his thrusts got sloppy and his grip on your hips got tighter, nails digging into your flesh.
With your body fighting itself to not orgasm, your tears spilled out of your eyes once more, breaths so deep you squeak every time you inhale.
“Cry all you want, brat. They don’t mean shit t’me.”
“Daddy, ple-ease let me come-oh, fuckkk- I- I can’t hold off m-much longer, plea-se I’ll be good, pleaseee.” Trying to speak through gritted teeth, you begged and pleaded trying to reason with him so you could finally release.
“Come on then, let that fuckin’ pussy come all over me. Let me feel what it's like to have a virgin fall apart on my cock and beg me not to fill them up.”
The evil tone was enough to send you reeling and your eyes rolled back tightly as you finally released that pressure you had to put off.
“What a good fuckin’ pet you are for Daddy. That’s ittt.” He purrs, slamming into your hips as he panted loudly.
Your body felt numb and you were still seeing stars, your ears ringing and his moans were so muffled you couldn’t do anything but jolt as the waves of your orgasm washes over you. Soon enough he rips is cock out of your entrance and you feel empty, already missing him inside you.
Joel grunts and cusses loudly as he paints a pretty picture on your asscheek with his cum.
You fall to your side and catch your breath while Joel goes soft in his hand, watching you as he tries to manage his own breathing.
“Maybe next time you’ll listen to me, won’t you baby?”
1K notes · View notes
munivrse · 6 months
Text
❀⋆.ೃ࿔ Garden Kisses
bff to gf!bada lee
cw: friends to lovers. a bit of angst in the beginning. cunnilingus. jealous bada. bada is bad at communicating feelings. some texts thrown in there. possessive bada. pussy drunk bada.
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── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
"how do i look?’
“fine.”
“just fine?”
“what do you want me to say?”
you turn from facing the mirror to look at your best friend. bada was laid out on your mattress, hands behind her head while she observed you.
“i want you to be enthusiastic- i haven’t been out with a girl in so long. i need to look good enough to eat. and i mean that. i want her to-”
“okay. thats enough- you look great.”
bada grabs her phone from your nightstand and starts scrolling.
you stare at her in hopes she’ll meet your eyes but she never does. you walk up to the bed and grab her ankes. bada whips her head up in surprise.
“what the fuck are you doing?”
you roll your eyes, “you’re in a pissy mood. why?”
she just stares at you wordlessly. you frown at her actions, letting go of her ankles.
bada mumbles something under her breath as you walk out the door.
you glare at her, “what was that?”
she glares back, “i said i hope you have fun.”
your eyes water a bit. this wasn’t normal behavior coming from her. she used to be so supportive when you went out with people, making sure you were safe, texting you during your dates to see if you were havinga good time. lately she’d been so… passive. and you just couldn’t figure out why.
you slam the door shut behind you.
bada sort of feels bad, really. she just couldn’t help but be pissed off that you didn’t recognize what was right in front of you. she wanted you. desperately. and a part of her hoped your date didn’t go well.
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
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── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
you open the door to your shared apartment, locking it behind you. you throw your purse on the couch and make way to the kitchen. you yell out for your roommate but get no response other than a quick, “hmm?”. you go ahead and start ranting about your date.
“she was so, so fine bada. really. but when i asked her if she wanted to get out of there, she looked at me like i was fucking crazy. like she wasn’t rubbing her hand up and down my thigh. those are horny actions, no innocence about it. so then i asked her what’s wrong and she has the nerve to tell me that i was being too forward. can you believe that? maybe i need to come across less brave. what do you think?”
you turn around and bada is standing in the entryway of the kitchen, arms crossed and leaning against the wall. you didn’t hear her come down the stairs at all so you jump a little at the sight of her,
“what the fuck- are we sneaking up on people now?”
she says nothing, opting to just roll her eyes. you continue,
“i don’t know. i’ve just been on so many failed dates. i want to joke around and say i’m too funny for these bitches to handle but gods honest truth…” you trail off as bada starts to walk toward you. your heart starts beating faster than it previously was, but you continue anyway,
“gods honest truth, i’m starting to think it’s me,” you look down the floor, picking at your hands, “and i dont know what to do about that. i just feel like nobody wants me. i dont know what i could possibly do differently. i think…” your words trail off. under your hands you could see bada’s shoes nearly touching your own. you could feel the heat radiating off of her body. when did she get this close?
“i think i-” bada’s hand goes under your jaw, tilting your head up to meet her own. she looked down at you, her eyes hooded. she leans down until her nose is touching yours,
“stop thinking.”
your brain malfunctions and you start spitting out words-
“well- i mean- i just think that-”
bada grins at you, her other hand going to tuck your hair behind your ear.
“m-maybe…” your eyes meet hers, “maybe i should stop thinking. or talking. one of the two. or maybe both-”
bada interrupts you by pressing her lips against yours. at first, you don’t reciprocate and bada panics, but then your lips begin to move along with her own. you wrap your hand around the nape of her neck and pull. bada takes this as her green light. she walks you two back into the counter. once she feels you bump against it, both hands grip your waist and she sits you on the counter.
she pulls away from you, hands rubbing up and down your sides. she leaves teasing kissed in between her words,
“been wanting to do this for so long.”
her lips meet yours again, sloppier than the last. her hands glide down your waist and stop at the curve of your ass, pulling your hips towards hers. you let out an involuntary moan, bada whines into your mouth shortly after,
“i’m so glad its me making you make those pretty little noises.” she leaves short kisses down your neck, “been hearing you give them away to other people. should’ve been me the whole fucking time.”
her lips reach the base of your neck, and she begins sucking marks along your collarbones. your hands grip at her hair, arching your body into her own. her hands move back up to your waist, toying at the hem of your shirt. she pauses her ministrations on your neck,
“can i?”
“please.”
she pulls your shirt over your head and gives you a soft kiss on the lips once your top half is bare. she gives you a look over, and when her eyes meet yours once again, just above a whisper, “you’re so pretty.”
she kisses down your chest and stops once she reaches your breasts. she just stares for a moment and you giggle,
“when i asked you ass or titties and you responded titties, you really meant it didnt y-” you cut yourself off with a loud moan. bada wrapped her mouth around your nipple and swirled her tongue around the bud. once she’s satisfied, she pulls away and blows cold air on it to watch it perk back up. she repeats this on your other breast as well. your back arches into her mouth for the second time tonight (and definitely not the last-) your hands grip at her hair a little tighter and she lets out a delicious, long winded whine.
“fuck- i should’ve done this so much sooner. fuck you for letting anyone other than me touch you like this. feel you like this.”
her kisses begin to trail down to your lower stomach,
“i should’ve never let you leave this goddamn apartment for those dates. i should’ve kept you home, made you feel good, kept you sated. all those nights i heard you moaning out other people’s names, wishing it was my own.”
bada gets to her knees, looping her fingers around your skirt and pulling it down. she kisses your clit over the fabric of your underwear,
“you’re so wet i can see it through your panties. who’s making you feel this good now baby?”
your stomach twists delightfully, “you.’
bada licks a strip up your clothed pussy,
“you can do better than that.”
you huff, “you, bada.”
she peels your underwear from your cunt, mouth hovering over where you need it most.
“again.”
“you- fuck,” bada presses a soft kiss to your now unclothed clit. you continue,
“you make me feel this good, bada. only you.”
bada looks up at you, eyes hooded and a lopsided grin on her face,
“good girl.”
her mouth covers your clit again, sucking and swirling her tongue around the bundle of nerves. your head shakes at the amount of stimulation you recieved so quickly. you’re moaning out, hands gripping bada’s hair tight, making her groan onto your pussy, feeling the vibrations from her mouth. she pulls away,
“you taste so fucking good. how dare you give this pussy away to someone else?”
she spits on it and licks a stripe up your slit, sucking on your clit and pulling away with a pop. her eyes pierce through your own as she looks up to you,
“never again.”
you nod and repeat her words, “never again.”
her thumb comes up to rub slow circles around your clit and her tongue darts in and out of your opening. you’ve had previous partners eat you out before, but bada was enthusiastic about it. she was moaning into your cunt like it was a delicacy only meant for her. her eyes squeezed shut everytime your hand grips her hair and you pushed her further against your pussy. your legs began to squeeze around her head and you swear to god you see her eyes roll to the back of her head. if nothing else, bada is a giver. you stop gripping her hair in favor of pushing her away from your cunt by her forehead. bada’s eyes flash up to yours and she is a sight to see.
her pupils are blown wide, she’s flushed from her cheeks down to her neck. her mouth is glistening in your wetness. she licks her lips,
“what is it baby?” she purrs.
you mumble but she can’t understand what you’re saying. your head is so jumbled with pleasure that you can barely form coherent sentences, but bada makes out a couple words.
per your blabbering request, she inserts two fingers into your pussy. your legs tense up and your hands fly to her hair again. she presses wet kisses along the inside of your thighs as she lets you get used to the feeling of her fingers inside you. once you’ve stopped clenching around her fingers and your legs relax, bada begins to pump them in and out of you in a slow pace.
“does it feel good?”
you nod, eyebrows creasing, “more. please.”
bada giggles, “always so polite.”
she curls her fingers inside of you, moving them at a quicker pace. you use the hands in her hair to push her face back into your cunt. she makes eye contact as she flicks her tongue back and forth against your sensitive, nearly overstimulated bundle of nerves.
this almost does it for you, your legs start to shake over bada’s shoulders, your bach arches, and you feel the beginnings of a knot forming in your stomach.
bada frees up her mouth, “are you gonna cum, pretty girl?”
you whimper out a quick yes and try to push her back to where she originally is but she tsks,
“say please.”
you nearly glare at her, but you were so close. you couldn’t argue at this point.
“please.”
bada ducks her head back down to your pussy but before she continues her assault on your cunt, she gives you the go ahead,
“that’s it. cum in my mouth. make a mess on me, please baby.”
her wish is granted as your toes curl and the knot in your stomach unravels. you feel nothing less than euphoric and bada is feeling just about the same. she’s groaining out as you clench around her fingers bullying the inside of your cunt. her mouth glued to your clit as she guides you through your orgasm. your legs are wrapped so tightly around her head that her ears ring, but she couldn’t be happier. she feels you relax before she hears you relax.
your legs stop shaking, you’re not clenching around her fingers as tightly, and the grip on her hair has loosened. however, you were still whimpering out as she pulled her fingers from inside of you. she stands back up and places her hand on the base of your neck. she makes you watch as she puts her fingers in her mouth, swirling her tongue around them. once she’s finished, she pulls them out and uses her thumb to open your mouth. she lets the mix of her spit and your wetness drip from her mouth into your own,
“swallow it.”
you do as your told.
“let me see.”
your mouth opens for her and her previously tense facial expression morph into something softer. admiration. she grins at you,
“i want you.”
you grin right back at her,
“i’m yours.”
1K notes · View notes
etdanger · 2 months
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AHHHH omg pls tell me u see the vision with corrupt cop mingyu and neighbor nice girl who’s super sweet !! she’s innocent but not stupid and mingyu likes that but she just pays him no mind
CW: NONCON, DRUGGING AND SOMNOPHILIA.
first, this 98% background story and 2% smut, literally, more of mingyu just being fucking sick in the head than anything but i really liked writing this so, and second, kinda fuck the police i guess-
the hot, older, seemingly normal cop next door that gets interested in you since the day he knocked on your door to introduce himself and offer you his number because “you’re so young… and alone too, it can be dangerous around here” clearly flirting and you simply nodded, gave him the biggest smile, a “thank you” and closed the door on his face.
you’re so sweet and nice and clearly such a good girl, so pretty too, he does everything to try and get your attention and yet nothing but smiles and few conversations from you. but he knows you’re not stupid and thinks you’re playing hard to get, convinces himself you looked at him differently once, and that just drive drives him further into his obsession with you and that’s where his not so normal side comes out.
listen, i don’t think he will ever admit out loud that he’s stalking you but that definitely what he does. he is a cop and that comes with certain benefits, he’s just using those to get closer to you. totally the type to find out where you work and ask his superiors to have his route reallocated to the area so he can spend all his day looking out for you. discovers your favorite cafe close by and starts casually ordering there too, acting all surprised when he hears your voice calling him, starts offering to take you to places and is quickly to brush it off when you say you can’t disturb his job, claiming it’s a “slow day, nothing really happening”.
you get what i’m saying here? he’s the type to use his job as a way to slowly insert himself into your life, your personal space, and it totally escalates to more extreme things. i can see him starting to find ways to scary you, to make you need him and his help, sending you creepy texts from random numbers through the day, pictures of yourself, even finding ways to break into your house in the middle of the night, making noises to wake you up or leaving things for you to find. his chest gets filled with such a sick satisfaction when you finally call him one night in tears and whispering, asking for help because there’s someone in your house and of course he is there in a minute, gun in hand and everything. so nice he is, taking your shaking body in his arms and reassuring you you’re safe, he won’t let anything happen to you. and of course, of course he asks you if you want to sleep in his house that night, or how many nights you want obviously, if that would make you feel safe, kissing your forehead so gently when you look up with teary eyes and nods.
he wraps you in a blanket, makes you tea, insists you take his bed, he won’t mind sleeping in the couch. listens carefully to everything you have to say about the things that are happening and wipes your tears when you cry, reads the texts you received as if he wasn’t the one who wrote every single one, looks at the pictures… promising he will make everything on his reach to find out whoever this person is, you can trust him.
and honestly i don’t care that this is too cliche or whatever, he would put something on your tea. like, i think that at this point he would be so desperate to have you, he doesn’t care anymore, just the sound of you crying and saying you needed his help, feeling your shaky form against his body, all of that was enough to make him hard, to think he wouldn’t try to touch you would be nonsense. so yes, he does puts something on your tea, enough to not have you opening your pretty eyes for hours, and stands for a few moments at the bedroom door watching you sleep, loving smile on his lips seeing you so relaxed in his bed, cuddling one of his pillows.
walks closer, as if you could wake at any giving moment, and sits by your side, brushing hair out of your face, leaning down to kiss your cheek and corner of your lips, breathing into your smell… he’s such a creep, for christ’s sake. runs a hand up and down your arm while the other palms his cock through his sweatpants, quick to pull your top up to get a good view of your tits, not holding back on grabbing one, yes, he should be careful, not leave marks, but he waited for so long for this, jerked off under the shower so many times thinking about you… speaking of jerking off, starts pumping himself by instinct, too lost on feeling your body. would try to resist but end up parting your legs and licking his fingers to toy with your pussy, groaning a bit too loud upon feeling your little clit and how tight you are, not properly wet, barely taking the tip of his index finger— but it’s okay, he will have time to make you wet for him in the future and fuck you nicely. spills all over his hand between groans and whispering things such as “you’re going to be mine, uhm? you’re meant to be” and “going to make you my pretty little wife, come home every day to you waiting for me here”
sigh… totally normal man who just wants a little wife.
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loafgeto · 2 months
Text
FREAKS — 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭. kamo choso
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synopsis | at your university, choso is a student one would normally not associate with. however, you— a popular, attractive, and smart student can’t seem to disagree with that.
contents | fem!reader, no curses au, explicit language, college au, small lore, fingering, unprotected sex, rough sex, deep penetration, squirting, creampie, overstimulation, breaking the bed (somewhat), pet names
word count | 3.4k
notes | i’ve been craving choso content lately so here it is
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“are you guys going to the party tonight? i heard that dude naoya is hosting it,” one of your friend’s mention. it’s a friday night, you all were walking out from the library and back towards your sorority hall just five minutes away— after a long and busy week of classes, clubs, activities, homework and assignments, it was finally time to celebrate the start of the weekend with a party.
“naoya’s pretty hot, don’t you think? his rude attitude strikes off five points, but he’s fuckable,” another one of your friend’s reply, earning several snickers from the other girls. “but he only wants to fuck [name] though,” she adds on as they all turn their eyes to you, but you weren’t even paying attention to anything they were chatting about.
your eyes were glued to your phone, messaging someone with a small grin and your friends exchanged quick glances. with a gentle tap on your shoulder, you finally shift your gaze to your friend beside of you. with an awkward stance, you place your phone screen against your chest.
“what’s wrong?” you question, blinking several times. your friends acknowledged this behavior of yours several months ago, they questioned frequently at the beginning— however this occurred consistently, and they stopped pestering since you never gave them a specific answer on what’s causing you to smile and distract you. “oh nothing. just wondering if you’re gonna go to the party tonight,” one of your friend’s reply.
“party?” you repeat— shortly recalling to the moment when one of the boys from a fraternity verbosely conveyed about another frat hosting a party to you in your calculus class. though, you briefly listened and didn’t continue to listen to the rest of what he was saying. but you already made plans for the night, so attending this party was never an option. “probably not, geto-sensei wants me to attend his 7pm lab. and as his teaching assistant, i can’t say no.”
“ahh, right right. but why not come the last hour?”
“that’s only if i feel energized enough,” you reply, flashing your friends a smile but of course, it indicates as an absolute no— since your plans may cause you to spend the night somewhere else. by the way, you weren’t actually going to attend professor geto’s lab, he didn’t even have one scheduled for friday’s. your friends just naturally believed it since you’re always a helping aide to him.
as your eyes weren’t directed ahead, you couldn’t detect another group of students walking in the opposite direction towards you and your friends— your shoulder collides with another student’s, someone taller, more muscular and could cause you to nearly stumble back but instead, it’s your phone slipping past your hand.
you gasp, eyes immediately following after your phone. as you were about to reach it before it fell, the other person you bumped into snatches it. your heart nearly stopped, in relief that your phone didn’t drop flat to the concrete ground beneath. you hear your friends take a quick breath and begin whispering upon the scene.
your eyes raise to meet the empty gaze of choso kamo, a relatively known student at your university. your phone is in his hands, secured and safe, however, none of that matters.
“your phone,” choso speaks— his voice sending immediate chills down your spine. you weren’t afraid of him, but his demeanor and attitude spikes dominance over you, threatening you— and you didn’t dare to look in his eyes any longer.
“thank you..” you quietly share your gratitude as you reach for your phone and quickly scatter away with your friends.
as you’re leaving, you can feel choso’s icy gaze following you and not once did you look back.
“you gotta get a new phone, [name],” one of your friends utter as you all reached the area of your sorority.
“what? i just got this phone, you know it’s not cheap,” you reply at an instant, sighing after as you all reach the steps of the large building. your friend chuckle, setting her hands on her hips.
“what? you’re saying you want the freak’s germs on it?”
“this isn’t middle school, and besides— he saved my phone from falling and potentially getting damaged,” you reply, as if you’re defending him, but your friends can’t continue to argue since he practically did do what you just said. “anyways, i have to get ready to go to professor geto’s lab. have fun at the party,” you add, passing through your friends to enter the house first.
you reach your room and step in, immediately shutting the door behind of you.
to begin with, why was choso called a freak? well, you attend a small, private, and prestigious university that has 3,000 students maximum. it’s perfect for the kids who are born in wealthy families, have excellent education and grades, and are worthy to present the school with honor. in the eyes of the public, the school is perfect— but nearly every student isn’t.
parties, drugs, and sex happen— per usual at every university, though information doesn’t normally spread across due to reputations.
choso just happens to enter the school due to the fact that he’s the chairman’s son, but it wasn’t like he wasn’t smart— in fact he is. choso, along with several of his freaky friends, run around campus not necessarily giving a damn about anyone or anything. they attend class of course, maintain grades and whatever like a normal student.
you never engaged with him as much, no one really wanted to. you don’t know what he did to earn his reputation, given that he’s two years older than you— but you’ve always heard it’s because he mumbles weird syllables in class, sometimes stares at a wall and hysterically laughs, or something similar to what a psychopath would do. it didn’t make anything easier because of the mark tattooed on his face. even so, you didn’t necessarily believe the rumors— as, you had to find out yourself, right?
when your friends leave for the party, you’re left completely alone. well, you make sure you’re alone before slipping back into your room— switching out your pairs of underwear and bra into something more laced, expensive and revealing. you throw on a small tight skirt and a shirt that just perfectly shapes your boobs. after retouching your makeup and hair, you looked like you were going to a party.
but of course you weren’t, and you put on a large jacket and a mask, not wanting anyone you know to see you in such clothes— after claiming you’re going to a lab lecture.
now, recalling to when you had to find out the rumors of choso yourself— it eventually happened, several months ago. you fortunately slipped into a small class with him and after a months observation, you came to conclusion that he’s completely normal. just a laid-back, stoic and bored dude who just wants to leave class, like all of the other students.
your impressions on him eventually changed when you became partners with him on a project.
from there, it was history.
“c-choso.. slow down~” the soft pitch of your mewls ring choso’s ears like a melody, arousing him to curl and thrust his fingers faster into your wet and needy cunt. he groans, feeling you squeeze around them as you’re kneading your nails into the his back muscles.
clothes discarded and scattered on the floor of his room, you’re laid back on the mattress of his bed, legs pushed apart so that choso’s between them and allowing him to insert his fingers into you easier. your moans whirring in the room, merging with the dirty sounds of your pussy yearning inches of him even more.
“the sound of your voice doesn’t seem to want me to slow down,” choso replies in a low purr, sending vibrations to your core, causing you to pulsate around his fingers. he presses gentle kisses against your ear, down towards your neck as he digs his fingers deep, coating them with your slickness. “how does this pretty girl want it tonight?”
“fuck- rough, tonight choso. need you s’bad after this week.. missed your touch so so much,” you reply, pulling him close to you as much as you could, trying to enclose the space between you both. you feel choso’s warmth all over you, yet you crave for more.
most people wouldn’t expect you to be begging to choso the freak, hardly anyone would— however, they didn’t know choso like you did. they didn’t know how good he is at sex— they didn’t know how much pleasure and satisfaction he brought to you, more than any other guy has. when they say he’s a freak, he definitely is a freak.
“sure about about that? sure you’re missing my touch? weren’t you just being touchy with those guys earlier at the library?” choso remarks with a grin, slipping his wet fingers out and circling your sensitive clit with his middle finger.
“t-they were just partners for a project!” you reply, a short moan following after as he pushes his fingers back into you.
“partners? do your partners usually stare at your ass and tits? what about the shoulder touches and head pats? did you like that? is that apart of the project?” choso’s trivial questions have you squint a puzzled look at him— was he serious right now? your expression of disbelief only causes him to chuckle, and of course, he’s joking for the matter.
“i only think about you- choso,” you choke out the response as you feel him rub the pad of his fingers against your g-spot, stimulating your climax at a gradual pace. the movements of his fingers have your mind stirring towards another thought, squeezing around them in order to sink them into you deeper. choso teases your clit again with his thumb, smiling at your reactions.
“do you?”
“yes—”
your words are interrupted as choso fastens his pace, knuckles slapping against your wet folds and creating lewd, wet noises in the room. you can’t even respond to his words properly because you’re so focused on the addictive pleasure, and choso’s using that as an opportunity to tease you.
“how much do you think about me? i want to know,” choso hums against your ear, and you can imagine a wide grin on his lips as he speaks.
“so, so much, choso. i imagine you fucking me every day—” your replies are so filthy and unimaginable— no one could ever guess you or anyone to be saying this to choso. but your words are genuine, you think about the man a lot, more than you anticipated. during the night, you can’t help but touch yourself, imagining choso pleasing you just like now. the amount of times you almost got caught moaning his name was innumerable.
“is that right?” choso whispers and leans to give you a kiss, a rough kiss. pressing his tongue against yours and moving his lips as if he’s devouring you. he’s uncertain if your words are genuine, but at that moment, it didn’t matter whether it was or not— he just liked to hear it.
of course, choso didn’t expect himself to be in situation like this— especially with you: a smart, diligent and popular student who has loads of friends, and dozens of men chasing after. he figured the attraction started when you both had class together, and eventually grew into you two fucking. choso didn’t complain though, besides: once you both finish college, you two will never cross paths again.
“choso- please, fuckfuck- ‘m about to cum-” you cry out when your lips parted, faint tears glossing your eyes. the erotic noises of your pussy and your moans mix, before you feel your legs tremble and your toes curl. you orgasm to satisfaction, squirting all over choso’s bed and hand when he pushes his fingers out.
the air feels heavy as your heart pounds, mouth gasping for breath. you didn’t even realize how much you came, and even choso was surprised with it. he smiles slightly, watching as you’re in a short daze. and when you look up at him, you see him already positioning his hard, thick pre-cum spilt cock at your entrance.
“w-wait choso, i’m still sensitive-”
but your words are in vain when choso pushes his cock into your cunt, instantly spreading your sensitive walls and causing you to reach another orgasm. you gasp, feeling choso fill your hole as he pushes your legs back further, putting you in a mating press position.
“my girl wanted it rough tonight, didn’t she?” choso says, already beginning to thrust hard at a moderate pace. your moans echo as a response to his words, walls clenching around him when you hear my girl.
choso lowers himself down, grunting softly as he sways his hips forcefully, slamming his cock into your pussy before having a hand wrapped around your neck. you feel a squeeze as his thrusts quicken, and chokes of moans falls from your mouth. his bare cock was fucking into you deep, rubbing every spot of your gummy walls and stimulating you towards your next high.
by now, anyone beyond the walls of the room could hear the moans and cries you were making, but it wasn’t like you two cared about it or the consequences.
as of now, choso was roughly pounding into you. a hand still around your neck as the other is pressing hard against the mattress, his hips thrusted quickly, creating loud sounds of skin slapping. you feel your core tightening, twisting from the amount of times he has already made you cum. the bed shook slightly underneath you and the frame nearly was railing against the wall.
your arms that were once around him had dropped above your head as your mind slowly starts to fog and thoughts no longer processed, aside from choso and the current moment. the mewls and other erotic sounds were reaching a higher pitch, and a knot was quickly forming in your stomach.
“choso- i’m gonna-” the warning was interrupted as choso’s cock grinds against your sensitive g-spot, making you cum at an instant. your short cry was muffled when choso presses his lips against yours, capturing your sounds into his mouth.
the night lead towards choso repeatedly making you cum with the rough pounding of his cock, and you couldn’t fathom the amount of times you came. the man hadn’t even came yet, as if he was saving it for the very end.
now lying on your chest, choso had lifted your hips towards his as he slips his cock in and out of you from behind. your loud cries and moans sink into the mattress as choso presses your face down against the material of his bed, grasping his hand around the strands of your hair and grunting along each thrust.
the sounds became sloppy, dirtying the bed that choso would have to clean again, and the smell of sex filled up the entire room.
“shit, princess—” choso moans when he feels you pulsate around him each time you came. he nudges his fingertips into the fat of your ass, possibly marking the skin. however, you’re unable to formulate words as he’s overstimulated you to an extent, your moans and the calls of his names only told him how you felt that moment: addicted to his cock. “that’s right, fucking take it.”
“choso.. fu-fuck,” you sob into the mattress, tears rolling down your cheeks as you feel him penetrate the deepest parts of your pussy. his hips slam against your ass harshly, sending stinging sensations throughout your entire body. “i can’t.. it feels s’good..”
“yeah, it does huh, baby?” choso cooed, caressing the side of your ass, watching as your uncontrollable moans proceed to fall out. “so good that you’re forgetting about everyone else?”
“ngh.. huh..” was all you could respond, it may look pathetic to be in a state like this— however, choso just knows how to make your mind flurry with so much thoughts that it blocks your focus of the outside world.
“i guess that’s a yes then,” choso smiles, pushing your head down further against the mattress as he abuses your hole with his cock. the bed frame continued colliding against the wall, creating louder creaking sounds as if the bed was about to break apart with how rough he was fucking you.
your eyes roll back as the ecstasy pumps through your veins, enough to make you cum again and again. it was too much to handle as much as it felt good, and choso wasn’t intending to stop anytime soon. he can see how much of a mess he’s made you, drunk all over his cock as usual.
choso never interacted with anyone on campus besides his siblings— only times happened to be during group projects or discussions, but they always ignored him each time. honestly, he didn’t even know where his reputation came from. maybe it was the fact that he had a tattoo on his face, but he did that out of spite of his father. however, he didn’t think it’d lead to people thinking he was some criminal or bad luck.
when he partnered up with you during a project, he thought you would just leave him to do it by himself and join another group. but you actually reached out to him and asked for his number, wanting to work on the project together like a normal partner. of course, he was surprised, that a girl like you would approach him despite the rumors.
the day you two shared a kiss and had sex for the first time on his bed, choso knew he had became addicted just as much as you’ve became addicted.
you two fucked anywhere and anytime you could: the backseat of his car, your sorority house’s kitchen, the gender neutral bathroom in the library, and even behind the bleachers in a field. even through all that, you two pretend not to know each other when crossing paths on campus. you’re in your own world, and he’s in his own.
but lately, choso couldn’t hold back the feeling of just claiming you as his. it was impossible to stop these lingering feelings he’s trying to hard to bottle up.
“fuck- i’m gonna cum, baby,” choso groans as his body slightly slumps over yours.
“cum in meee. please, choso-” you manage to beg out, gripping around him and trying to milk him dry with your cunt. “it’s my safe day— please—”
“anything for my girl,” choso replies, eyes lowering to his cock that coated with your wetness— slipping in and out repeatedly at a maintaining rough pace. his pace caused the bed to creak even louder, and a sharp snapping sound is heard— but neither of you pay attention. “gonna fill your pussy all the way up then, ‘kay? take it all like a good girl. and you better not waste it.”
“n-never! mm- choso!” you couldn’t stop crying out his name as your hands grabbed the sheets when he pounds his heavy load into you.
as choso groans, his warm cum spills into your baby room, milking the walls and filling you entirely. your eyes roll back, mouth open to heave air. your body shook and choso pulls out shortly after, sitting back and gasping for air.
you both watch as his cum slowly leaks out from your swollen pussy and streams down your thighs.
it becomes silent between the two of you, but your eyes lock shortly after and choso grabs a tissue box nearby to wipe the remaining cum streaming on your thighs.
“ch-choso…” you murmur as your body sinks into the bed, now, something felt odd.
“what is it?” choso questions when he tosses the tissue to the trans can near by and he climbs over you. he kisses your cheek, then down your jaw and back towards your lips. it was a sensual kiss, shared between two people who were slowly developing feelings for each other.
“i think.. we broke the bed,” you reply as he pulls inches away.
“oh, so that’s the sound i heard earlier.”
“what the fuck are you gonna say to the ra’s? you know these bed frames were new this year too! they might cost a lot of money..” you spat, giving choso a look of hesitation and concern. but he only chuckles before pressing a gentle kiss on your forehead, and you pout.
“i’ll just tell them two freaks were fucking.”
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LOAFGETO. thank you for reading! please do not copy my work or publish in another media without my permission.
a/n: hello dear readers, i apologize for so much delays, but i promise im getting back into writing again! i’ll be working on more content and publishing fics, so look out for those 🤭
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deadghosy · 2 months
Text
HAZBIN HOTEL X CAELUS! READER
prompt: you were found digging in their trash and they took you in
(I got covid😭 so me posting xreader will be kinda slow)
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You were digging for some food ever since you fell from heaven because you kept fighting people over trash…I mean damn reader…
You fell with a blank look as you had a rotten banana in your mouth as you looked down to see pentagram city…so what did you do? You pulled out your fire sword and slash the ground to soften your fall which worked. You changed it to a bat for protection as you found a dumpster!
CHA-CHING✨ MORE TRASHHHH
You dig in the dumpster not hearing a person whistling. The person dropped the garbage bag shocked to see a….? Whatever you are digging in the dumpster. Your face was completely dirty as you lift it up to show you found a cool old watch.
Charlie didn’t know what to do. Are you homeless? Is what she thought as she takes you out the garbage as you blankly stare at her “•_•” “uhm sweetie are you okay?” “……” “not much of a talker huh…” you just stayed quiet as Charlie introduced herself and shook your hand bringing you to the hotel so you can have a place to stay.
I feel like you were a new angel and only stayed for like 1 month…(free trial ass shit…) and so when you didn’t act holy and proper. That’s why you mostly got kicked out
Vaggie will know you are an angel because of your angelic look and golden eyes as you just stand there minding your business. You tell her you fell because you fought over your treasure….your trash practically. So Vaggie tells you what happened to her and you hugged her making her feel safe about herself a bit.
You two have matching bracelets you made from an exercise Charlie did.
Okay I headcannon that Lucifer is already in the hotel living with his daughter. And he felt your presence and he would be like. “Fuck are you doing here”🤨 “I fought for my life.”
Vox one time put you on air with him because of your golden shining eyes….i think he was flirting with you as you ate some gift cookies he made for you…
Velvette tried to make you a model, but you kept wandering off somehow. Literally she got tired of you but never of your face as she at least posted you wearing some nice 2000 makeup
Carmilla had a gut feeling about you being an angel. She wanted to kill you but then you gave her a ring you found in a dumpster because you said she reminded you of your earth mother/parent. Yeah she wanted to adopt you
You help sir Pentious, or who you call penny for his project builds. You dig in dumpster’s, trash bins, and garbage dumps
Angel dust and you sometimes just be on your phones all the time which is obnoxious. But hey, I don’t make the rules. Being on your phone makes it seem like you don’t want to be talked to which is true.
Lucifer made you a duck as he notciced how lonely you are….(you don’t give a fuck, you only need trash as your friends) so Lucifer made you 20 ducks that are based on your favorite things or like idk just ducks
The egg boiz follow you around as you literally calling you the, “TRASH BOSS!” Not in a bad way more like in admiration as you give them stuff from the garbage.
Your golden eyes shining in the night scaring husk as he didn’t even see you in his hind sight. Like he is a cat, but he didn’t even see you?!
You and alastor’s both eat weird things, like he is a cannibal….and for you..either trash or just normal weird food combos
Alastor would definitely try to get you to eat cannibal meat, but to be honest you can tell the difference between human and regular meat. You always know.
Niffty is the kind of person who would give you a trash flower crown, kinda like how she made a crown for Alastor ✨🦆
I headcannon your angelic/demon form to be a raccoon 💀
You send dumbass memes in the hazbin hotel gc…
You are quite the feral person tbh, but who didn’t know when you literally fought people for your damn trash.
You definitely had bit Valentino once as Angel dust brought you to a club and you were digging in trash to find something cool. But Valentino found you adorable in the face and wanted to make you a sex worker. And what did you do when he tried to hurt Angel?
YOU BIT HIS FUCKIN HAND ALMOST OFF AS ANGEL WAS TRYING TO PULL YOU OFF😭
Yeah..you definitely had blood dripping from your mouth when Angel dragged you out of the club
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xo-cori · 7 months
Note
Ellie is sooooo into sneaking around and secretly fucking you in public but Abby is a complete opposite she just wants you all only because only her can hear and see you because you’re hers. Idk how I think Dina would be!!!
kissing and hope they caught us
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pairing: ellie williams x fem!reader
summary: the best way to prove that somebody is yours is to show them off.
warnings: smut (MDNI), exhibitionism, ellie being a cocky little shit
a/n: lord forgive me
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All you can feel is her hands, everywhere.
Her fingers reach somewhere deep inside you as the palm of her hand covers your mouth, muffling all of your pretty noises only because she’s not sure how it’d sound to an outsider. After all, the two of you are cramped in an almost pitch black laundry room, the dim blue LED lights from the living room barely creeping in through the slits of the unlocked door. She’d been staring at you all night, though. She could bear not seeing you for a few minutes.
“Gotta be quiet,” Ellie mutters, “don’t want anyone walking in, do you?”
She expects to get some sort of reaction out of you, but you only clench down around her fingers at the thought of it. You grasp at the edge of the washing machine for some support, knees barely holding you up now, and Ellie doesn’t even try to hold in her laugh. “Oh, you would fuckin’ like that.”
You let out a low whine, though she can still hear it over the loud music just down the hallway. She moves her hand from your mouth so she can bring her lips to yours, working to swallow all of your moans that couldn’t be held back even if you tried. You weren’t trying, though. Not one bit. You gasp into the kiss as her fingers curl up, thumb pressing down onto your clit in a steady rhythm that has you seeing stars behind your eyelids. It’s embarrassing how close you are after just a few minutes alone with Ellie. She does unspeakable things to you, and seems to have a habit of making a mess out of you no matter where you are.
Bathrooms, closets, backseats. It’s a thrill that she chases, that gives her just as much pleasure as she gives you– if not more.
You haven’t been caught, yet, but you’re starting to think that it’s only a matter of time. Luck runs out quicker the more you abuse it.
“I’m gonna cum,” you whimper, grabbing onto her hair in a vain attempt to ground yourself. Your heart pounds in your ears to the beat of the music and she swears she can feel it against her own chest.
“Remember what I said, yeah? Quiet.” Ellie says. Regardless, her thrusts have somehow gotten faster and the speed dizzies you. Your head falls forward into her shoulder, pressing your mouth into the fabric of her sweatshirt to cover up the sound of another whine– it’s her name, she realizes, still quite loud despite your efforts.
She fucks you through our orgasm until you reach down to grab her wrist, halting her thrusts, mumbling something about it being too much, and she finally pulls out of you. You keep yourself tucked safely in her shoulder as you try to catch your breath.
Ellie lets you rest for a moment and takes the opportunity to lick the wetness from her pruned fingers, suddenly wishing that she’d taken you to a more secure area so that she could’ve tasted you properly– a regret she finds herself having often when you find yourselves in these situations.
After a few long moments, she gently grabs your chin and makes you look up at her, just barely able to see her eyes through the darkness. “Damn. I’m ready to go home if you are.”
Though you normally would’ve felt bad for leaving a party so early, you can’t imagine anything here better than what awaits you back home (or, if Ellie’s feeling to impatient, right there in the car). “I’ve been ready since we got here,” you huff.
“Do you think Dina’s gonna be mad?” She asks, eyebrows furrowing with a fickle concern that could easily be erased.
“Jesse brought Fireball, Els. She’s probably not gonna remember she even had this party.” You reply, to which she hums in agreement. Your friend isn’t exactly known for being able to handle her liquor, and you’d both seen her drink quite a bit of it within the span of a few hours. If she isn’t hunched over a toilet bowl by now, she’s probably going to keep drinking until she is.
So, Ellie kneels down to help you pull your shorts back up as you readjust your shirt to look more presentable; to make it look like you’d been doing anything but getting fucked in a laundry room.
You know, deep down, the thought of anyone finding out is only turning you on more.
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brattyfork · 5 months
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drank
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summary: matt n his brothers go to a party. he has fun but he missed you.
warnings: drunk sex, sub!matt+mommy kink lol
based on this request!
way back when, when matt and i first started having sex and figuring out our safe word, something interesting came up.
“what if i’m drunk?” i looked at him confused.
“what do you mean?”
“well sometimes when i’m drunk i get horny, i wanna have sex but i don’t want you to feel like you’re taking advantage of me”
“oh ok, uhh i mean we can still use the safe word in that situation right? ill just make sure you remember it before we start?”
“okay sounds good” he smiled at me.
the boys had some influencer party to go to, normally i’d tag along but i really didn’t wanna go anywhere, opting for one of matt’s tshirts instead of a crop top (is this line cringe?).
i knew matt wouldn’t do anything stupid at a party. furthermore, i knew nick and chris, mainly nick, wouldn’t let him do anything really stupid. i trusted him, i knew he’d feel the same about me going out, as long as he knew i’d be safe.
i decided to just sit on the couch, watch tv. i was watching criminal minds when i heard a car door outside. i could hear someone fumbling with the doorknob for a few seconds before before the lock turned and the door opened. nick walked in first, holding the door open for chris and a stumbling matt. he kicked off his shoes, slamming his hand on the wall, almost falling.
“how was the party?” i asked no one in particular.
“well they had fun” nick said, gesturing to the two younger triplets.
“it was cool, matt had too much to drink. lightweight.” chris rolled his eyes.
“be nice” i scolded. matt made his way to the couch, throwing himself over the back, sitting next to me then laying his head in my lap.
“you have fun baby?” i spoke softly.
“yes, missed you tho” i ran my hands through his hair.
“i missed you too my love” i dipped my head down to give him a sweet kiss. it quickly turned rough and needy. i pulled away, conscious of his brothers still downstairs. he let out a whine trying to chase my lips.
“you wanna go to bed baby?” i looked into his eyes, hoping he knew what i meant. his eyes were dark, not black with lust like usual, more doe-y, filled with need.
he nodded using all his strength to sit up, lifting his head off my lap. i stood up, looking back when i noticed he hadn’t moved. “cmon baby, let’s go” i tried to encourage him.
“mmmm, carry me”
“matt you know i can’t carry you, you’re too big”
“don’t be mean!”
“you know what i mean baby, you’re too strong and muscular”
“mhm”
“cmon get up, let’s go” i reached out my hand. he groaned, grabbing it and pulling with so much force i almost fell on him. i brought my other hand over, now using both my arms and all my strength to pull this man up. he finally stood up, he walked perfectly fine. i rolled my eyes, realizing he way just being lazy. he held my hand tight as i walked us up the stairs to our room. i pulled him into the room, he lets go of my hand, falling to the bed.
“how ya feeling baby?” i asked sitting next to him on the edge of the bed.
“i feel good, i missed you”
“i missed you too sweet boy”
“i really, really missed you” looking at me with his doe eyes, silently begging me to understand.
i leaned down to him pressing a sweet but deep kiss, pulling away shortly after.
“what’d you miss baby?” i whispered against his lips, pressing one more kiss to them before moving down his neck.
“your hands, your mouth, you” he whimpered the last word as i bit down into his neck, sucking a deep purple hickey into the soft skin.
“yeah? you want mommy to make you feel good? with my hands?” i ran my hands down his pants, resting my hands right next to his bulge. “with my mouth?” i placed wet kisses to his neck, grazing against the mark i left before.
“fuck yes please god yes”
“do you remember your safe word?”
“yes yes i know my safe word, just touch me already” i grabbed his face harshly.
“don’t be a brat, or ill leave you here to take care of yourself” i spat. he gave me puppy eyes.
“‘m sorry mommy”
“you gonna be a good boy for me?”
“yes yes, wanna be your good boy please”
i ran my hands up his shirt, moving them along his tummy before bringing my fingers to the hem and pulling it up. he got the hint and leaned forward, allowing me to take it off. i brought my hands down to his zipper. i began unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans when i felt him tug on the hem of my shirt. i pulled away, taking my hands off his lap to lift my shirt over my head.
when i looked back at him, his pants were down. i straddled him briefly, moving over him to the other side of the bed. i leaned down, kissing down his now visible v-line, slipping my fingers into the waist band of his boxers. his dick shot up, the tip red and needy, dripping with precum.
“aw baby. so worked up and i’ve barely touched you”
“please…”
“please what baby? what do you want?”
“need you to touch me please” i brought my hand up to his mouth.
“spit”
he did as i asked, or demanded i guess, and i brought my hand down to his cock, stroking up and down him a few times. he threw his head back, letting small moans and whines out, egging me on more.
i stroked him for awhile, focusing on the wonderful faces he made and his desperate noises. he started to squirm, trying to buck up into my hand.
“please mommy more i need more” i smirked at him, the sound of him begging was music to my ears.
i decided to be nice, letting spit fall from my mouth onto his cock before leaning down, sucking on the tip. as soon as i got used to his size in my mouth, i deep throat him, letting his tip hit the back of my throat.
this earned a loud “FUCK” from him, causing me to pull off, making him whine.
“you gotta be quiet baby, don’t want your brothers hearing how needy you are, do you?” i taunted, his cheeks turning a brighter pink. “gonna be quiet? be a good boy for me?”
“yes fuck i promise i’ll be good”
i brought my head down to his lap, taking all of him in my mouth at once. he bit his lip, the whimpers still sounding through. i sped up, going up all the way to the tip and quickly back down to the base. matt had stopped biting his lip, opening his mouth so he could let out large breaths. as i kept sucking him, his breathing turned to what could only be described as panting and fuck it was so hot.
“i-i’m close, f-fuck” he let out between pants. i thought for a second, stilling my movements before pulling off. he let out such a needy groan, i could’ve cum right then and there.
“why?” he looked to me, his eyes brimming with tears.
i gave him a kiss, feeling bad that he was upset.
“i’m sorry baby, mommy wants you to fill her up, don’t you wanna make mommy feel good?”
“yes fuck wanna be inside you mommy please god” he moved his hands up to my bra, still covering my chest.
“can you take this off? wanna see your pretty body” i smiled at him, moving my hands behind my back to unclasp it, pulling it down my shoulders making my tits bounce. i swear i could see some drool leave his open mouth. i quickly pulled my pants and underwear down, not wanting to make him wait any longer and needing him inside me.
i straddled his lap, rubbing my wet clit over his cock, still slippery from my mouth.
“ohmygod” he slurred out, making me giggle a bit, loving how much of an effect i had on him. i lifted myself up, taking him in my hand and lining him up with my entrance.
i sank down slowly on him, feeling every vein against my walls. his eyes rolled back into his head, a deep whine coming from his throat, harmonizing with my moans.
“fuck matty, so fucking big, making mommy feel so good” i bounced on him a few times before i realized how tired i was and began grinding instead.
“h-holy shit mommy, feels s’good”
“been such a good boy for me tonight baby, you wanna cum inside me?”
“fuck, yes please fuck oh my god”
i leaned down connecting our chests, moving my head into the crook of his neck. i sucked another mark into him, nibbling the rest of his neck before breathing on his ear.
“cum whenever you’re ready baby, gonna make mommy cum too” i continued grinding on him, his tip brushing the bottom of my cervix each time. i moved faster, chasing my own high. i felt him twitch inside me, sending me over the edge. i bit down on his neck, trying not to be too loud, matt cried out. between me biting him and clenching around him, his hips sputtered, unloading his cum as far into me as he could.
i let out a squeaky groan as he filled me up. there was no better feeling, his warm load sent me over the edge everytime. i came again, crying out as i clenched around his sensitive cock and began to twitch on him.
matt wrapped his arms around my lower back, trying to still my movements. we both came down from our highs, i lifted my head out of his neck, moving to look at him. his hair was messy, i could see the marks id left, his lips red from biting them so hard, his eyes glossed over.
i kissed him, passionately, there was no sexual motive behind it, i simply wanted to convey how much i appreciate him. he was incredible, in every single way, not just in bed, he was the perfect boyfriend. the perfect man.
“i love you more than anything”
“i love you too baby, so so much” he replied, brushing my hair out of my face.
i gave him another peck before moving to get off him, realizing his cum and cock we’re still inside me. he held my thighs, not letting me get up and i looked at him confused.
“will you uh- can we… sleep like this?”
“of course baby, you like how it feels? leaving your cum inside me? how tight i am around you?” i teased him.
“fuck don’t talk like that, i don’t have the energy for another round” he chuckled.
i gave him another kiss before laying down on top of him, moving carefully so he didn’t come out.
“goodnight matty” i whispered into his ear.
“goodnight my love”
a/n: hi yall, sorry i haven’t posted in a while. busy w school and on top of that we found out we gotta move. but i hope u guys enjoyed, i wrote most of this while high so if anything doesn’t make sense lmk. ALSO i am catching up on requests rn, if you requested something i promise i am working on it <3
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mournings-stars · 3 months
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Hello hello! I’d like to request some platonic into romantic headcannons on an Alastor x fallen ex-exorcist/exterminator reader please :>
Small background: Reader fell for whatever reason and maybe a few days to a week (or even months-) afterward they end up striking a deal with Alastor, where they’ll be under his protection (because as skilled as they are it wouldn’t matter much with the entirety of hell on their ass) but he gets a pretty good portion of their power in return or maybe something else that you think Alastor would take.
Gender neutral reader pls
I’ve only read one fic or two with this concept and I am on my hands and knees for more lol
If you prefer a different writing format or feel this is too specific or OC-ish please please please feel free to change anything! I’m not very picky ^^
Thank you for your time and have a good day/night!
okay i LOVE this concept — i think it be the slowest fucking burn in the world tho like
you were never one of adam’s favorites, as you had the tendency to spare demons who seem harmless, but covered it nearly everytime
during this last extermination, however, he was trying to catch you fucking up the plan, so the minute you skipped over someone, he had lute launch her weapon at you
i doubt he’d let her kill you or anything, but he definitely just left you there for the demons to finish off, probably pinned to the ground with lute’s spear in your wing or something before he called all the other exorcists back (and he made sure to leave your halo so even if you did change clothes people knew what you were)
luckily (not really) you’d be in cannibal town, so before anyone could get to you, alastor’s probably just walking around like nothings happening (LMAO) and sees you
i doubt he’d make it known he saw you, like he’d definitely keep humming merrily down the street until he saw you struggling to get away from him as quickly as possible and tearing your wing even more
“my, my, let’s calm down, shall we?” he’d laugh and take the spear out of your wing. “isn’t that better, little bird?” but he’d say that while literally pointing the spear at you so don’t feel too safe
you’d definitely get defensive and shoot into the air with your weapon, ready to kill, and i think after seeing you still attempting to fly with that damaged of a wing (like its fucked up), he’d be impressed enough to drop the spear he had with a very big grin
“you’d better hide, little bird”
and you’d take his warning to fly off, quickly snatching lute’s weapon with yours in case you needed to defend yourself
he would literally just smile and watch you leave before continuing to hum and walk down the street
it’d probably be like a solid three days of hiding and having to fight for your life before the damage to your wing really messed with you and you had to force yourself to find a good hiding place
maybe you see charlie on the news and notice that no one seems to want to go to her hotel, so you force yourself to fly all the way there like a week after her horrible interview (ep 1) and practically collapse at the front door
of course you recognize vaggie and of course you practically run over and hug her despite the spear pointed at you… and of course that means vaggie either may or may not have to confess depending on if you pick up that no one knows or not (off the concept but im sparing chaggie heartbreak)
“who the fuck is this?” would be the first thing you hear from a spider demon and you’d have to explain what you were and hope they didn’t kill you — which, duh, charlie wouldn’t that let happen
“hello again, little bird,” would make everyone shut up because… how does alastor know you??? of course, he doesn’t answer their questions, just says hello and moves on like it’s all normal
your first day would totally be catching up with vaggie, probably breaking down because you needed to get back to heaven and had no way there
i think exorcists probably have a little bit of angelic power, but they probably can’t create portals without that power being given to them or something which means you have no way home and no where to go
vaggie and charlie of course tell you to stay, but once anyone shows up they’ll know you’re here and all of hell would be coming to the hotel to try and get to you — and you didn’t want to ruin what they had going (even if it was small you thought it was a great idea) so they probably give you a change of clothes, something more hellish, and tell you to stay until you have somewhere else to go
that would probably give alastor the perfect opportunity to talk to you privately and offer his protection
you wouldn’t take his offer at first, but once pentious shows up and the overlords somehow find out that charlie is hiding an angel in her hotel (vox and his stupid drones) you dont really have a choice
i dont think he’d ask for any power in return, but i do think you’d owe him a favor each time he has to protect you
vox would probably give subtle hints in all the programs he runs, so alastor would have to protect you very often
that meant if he ordered you to get rid of someone, you did it — whether that meant by the snap of your fingers with holy light (which they could potentially survive or respawn from) or killing them with your exorcist weapon was totally up to him sometimes, he just asked that you create a bouquet of flowers for his room
usually the people he had you “take care of” were repulsive enough, and you never minded creating things with your abilities, so you agreed to what he asked with ease
it’d be a little time before who he instructed you to “take care of” slowly shifted to anyone who wronged you
of course, he’d still protect you, but if he didn’t own their soul and he didnt have an angelic weapon, he couldn’t ensure that they wouldn’t come back, so he asked you, “do you think they’ll come back for you, little bird?” if you were unsure, or knew it was likely they’d come back for the person that ended up being the reason they had to go through the painful process of respawning, he’d tell you to just kill them
it’d probably come to a point where he stopped asking for favors, made sure you were alright, and told you to focus on what you needed to do while he “did his job”
i think eventually you’d find a place you think could be safe and once your wing is totally healed up and alright you’d say your goodbyes even though you weren’t that close with anyone but vaggie (also i feel like niffty would be down to talk to u about her bug battles or some shit)
anyway, when you go to say bye to alastor, he definitely cashes in his favor with a simple “hmm, no” cus he sees no reason for you to leave??? like so what everyone else’s lives are in danger by you being here… you’re safer here
so you’d stay, and it’d definitely make charlie happy because if she can get an angel back to heaven that’d prove she could actually do this
you’d be pissed at alastor for a while, but slowly, it seemed like demons understood that by coming for you, they were fucking with the radio demon (and we all know how that goes) so after a few months you were finally left alone
in that time you’d totally help spruce up the hotel while slowly forgetting why you wanted to go back
but every once in a while you’d have a very prolonged sadness about the situation… heaven was your home after all, and even if you liked the hotel, you could never leave because the minute you stepped outside, there was a line for your head — you were trapped there (like a bird in a cage — hence the nickname)
i think even though everyone likes having you there, vaggie would eventually bring up lucifer (like he can literally open a portal…)
but immediately alastor is not fucking having it and he cashes in another one of his pent up favors, saying that getting back to heaven through a fallen angel was the dumbest thing you could do if you wanted it to look like you were the one wronged in this situation (he has a point i fear)
i think this is where you kind of accept that you’re not going home and maybe just give up because 1. you can’t go to the heaven embassy since you’d just be met with adam and 2. the only person that could get you contact wasn’t a good option
i think now would be when alastor recognizes how much you want to go home and finds himself feeling bad?? for keeping you, but he just wants you to get home safely and surely
still, once he sees that you literally wont leave your room and have contemplated taking your own halo he compromises to let you try going to the heaven embassy to see if you could get a meeting with anyone but adam
you said it wasn’t possible, but he insisted “i can’t have you looking so upset all the time, birdie” he’d say while using his hand to squish your cheeks into a smile just to make you laugh
so you’d go — i think you’d totally get there safely but once demons see an exorcist angel coming out of the heaven embassy, you have to fight the minute you step out of the building
you can 100% see holy light from the hotel, so the minute alastor sees a golden beam he’s out the door
you can handle your own, so you fought them off, but i’d imagine you get injured and that’s what really makes alastor realize he’s falling for you cus he’s seething
even just a minuscule amount of golden blood on you had him tearing apart any demon who even looked like they’d been near you
i hate to say it but i don’t think this would be a happy ending — reader loves heaven even though they hate being an exorcist and alastor knows that so he’d definitely keep his feelings hidden and if you showed any signs of feelings for him he’d be terrified because an angel falling, literally falling because thats what would happen to you, for someone like him would never get you back home
obviously it’d come to a point where he doesn’t want you to leave, but at the same time, he’d never keep you
if i did end up writing an actual fic of this it’d probably end on a bit of a cliffhanger ex. reader getting accepted back and being hesitant with alastor’s last favor just him saying, “if you want to stay for anyone, don’t,” and letting you decide whether or not to go back
OR reader being accepted back but still having to be an exorcist, so the next time they see alastor is the finale where adam would 100% put them against him
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cultpastorkevin · 4 months
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Cult Tips for AFTG writers
notes from the resident ex-cult pastor
If you’re in the cult, there is nothing bizarre abt what’s happening and in fact the normal stuff that happens outside of it is what’s bizarre to you. Target? Weird. McDonald’s? Even weirder. I can like guarantee Jean and Kevin never had McDonald’s until they left the Nest.
When you leave, you’re gonna be paranoid as fuck. All the time. Ngl at least for weeks but sometimes for years. Nightmares and insomnia 24/7. Hallucinations too lmao Riko is in every corner of empty rooms and you can hear his voice echo in the confines of the lockers.
I see a lot of Jean wanting to go back to the Nest, but not a lot of Kevin wanting to go back. He definitely struggled, 100%. In fact when he was in the pits of agony from his broken hand, was when he probably wanted to go back the most. Cult is home, cult is safe. Four walls you’ve always known and while it’s a cage at least it’s dependable. They hurt you but by god it always works out and the reward of pushing through this tragic incident is greater than the terror it caused in the first place. It’s a gift, actually. A gift from Riko. He saved Kevin. Cults save you. Cults make you wanna return to them like damn homing pigeons bruh. Give me more shattered hand Kevin screaming at Wymack to let him go back home and having a breakdown when he’s denied fics thanks
Piggybacking off the last one: cults are saviors; you’re nothing without them and they make sure you truly believe that; that everything that is done to you is for you and you’re blessed for it to be happening. You’re lucky even, to be allowed in it. Everything is as it’s supposed to be and order must never be challenged, because it works, and you’re the Edgar Allan Ravens, and this is the most honorable place you could be. All the pain you go through is you earning the right to be saved and to prove your worth every day on court. Only the worthy are honored.
You justify everything that happened and you will start fights and get angry with people who try to correct you and tell you it was wrong what went on.
On the other hand, you blame yourself for everything ever that happened there whether you were at fault or not. Hurting others, hurting yourself, gaslighting the fuck out of yourself over things maybe you could’ve prevented and over things you never could’ve stopped. The guilt is crippling and it eats you alive and haunts you.
There’s a lot of shame too. I see more guilt written than shame but shame is a huge portion of emotions that cult survivors have. Shits embarassing dude like “god how did I end up thinking this wack ass shit was normal” 😐 Shame comes later in the healing process usually, it’s after you have come to terms with shit that’s happened and you understand it. Looking back, you go “Jesus fucking Christ that was a red flag what the hell. Should’ve left then, or then, or then, or then” and then you’re just plain fuckin embarrassed.
Please look up how hive minds and brainwashing are created and work; also Stockholm Syndrome; understanding these would be incredibly helpful tbfh.
Diets are big; everyone eats the same thing; food is used as a reward and a punishment.
Hype hype hype. They whip up a frenzy of one singular emotion and use that to push you into a blind hysteria because you’re more suspectible to their influence when you’re out of your mind.
Drugs. Depends on the cult. But yeah these little bitches can be a huge factor for shit and can help with the brainwashing and hysteria and stockholm. Sometimes you don’t even know you’re being drugged or poisoned until you leave.
OH I ALMOST FORGOT. Dehumanization and then being treated like a person again can be traumatic as fuck yall!! Holy shit! Sometimes it feels worse than being dehumanized!
EDIT AGAIN: you don’t know what mental illness is !! Cults don’t fucking tell you these things lmao. if you show symptoms it’s your fault. Kevin being depressed his mom died was gonna get blamed on him and he was never going to be told grief is normal and it’s okay to be insanely sad. Jean also never got told his anger was correct or his trauma responses to being raped were realistic! They just got blamed for any reactions ever that weren’t neurotypical !! that is all; do with that what you will.
Idk if I think of anything else I’ll write another one but that’s all for now; I haven’t slept much lmao 🫡
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just-jordie-things · 1 month
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[part two] we weren’t just friends - okkotsu yuuta
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word count: 11k warnings: swearing, drinking (but it’s legal!), mentions of masturbating summary: two idiots that are bad at confrontation and don’t want things to be awkward somehow make things awkward anyways. more info: college!au, aged up characters, roommates!au, childhood friends, n*oya makes an appearance in this part, soft yuuta taking care of drunk reader
part two: “i’m not ready, eyes heavy now” ___
[mai] : do you want me to come kidnap you? just say we have plans
[maki] : you don’t need to kidnap her.  she’s a big girl.  She can handle talking about her feelings.  can’t you, (y/n)?
[(y/n)] : no i don’t think i can :’( pls come rescue me, idk what to do.
[mai] : maki where are the keys i’m going over there
[maki] : the fuck you are, stay away from my car.
[maki] : i say this with love, (y/n).  get out of bed and just talk to him.  it’s not like you boned.  A little kissing never hurt anyone.  your friendship is stronger than that, don’t you think? 
[(y/n)] : …it was a lot of kissing…
[mai] : did he get a boner? 
[maki] : you’ve been friends a long time.  and he kissed you back, didn’t he? he probably enjoyed it.
[(y/n)] : i think he enjoyed it… idk… i’m rlly embarrassed about it.
[mai] : if he got a boner he enjoyed it.
[maki] : ur being gross :p
[(y/n)] : but what if he just got carried away and it didn’t mean anything and he’s upset with me? 
[maki] : did he say he was upset with you? 
[(y/n)] : … no.
[mai] : he’s probs pent up now.  you should seduce him again.
[maki] : then all this talk is pointless.  go TALK to him and then if it’s bad we’ll come swoop you up and take you out for the day.  deal? 
[(y/n)] : bed is comfy… and safe…
[mai] : and if we don’t hear from u we’ll assume u seduced him again
[maki] : you got this :)
(y/n) sighed as she turned off her phone, dropping it onto her mattress as she glared up at her ceiling.  The light from the sun had long since poured in through the window, having woken her up hours ago.  She wasn’t surprised to see so many texts in her groupchat with the Zen’in twins after Toge blabbed about what he thought he saw when he returned to the apartment late last night.
Normally she would’ve ignored their pestering and turned down any assumptions they may have made.  But she needed advice from her closest friends on what to do now.  She had yet to leave the safety of her bedroom, knowing Yuuta would be awake and going about his morning routine.  Maybe it was silly to be afraid of running into him, but her shame kept her shackled to the bed.
Maki was right, it wasn’t fair to assume how Yuuta would behave today.  It was a discredit to the years of friendship under their belts.  But then again, making out in a sudden moment of weakness was a blunder on their friendship, too.
Dramatically, she rolled over, planting her face in her pillow and groaning out her frustrations.
When she finally made an appearance, Yuuta’s head shot up from the kitchen table where he’d set up his things to spend the day working on an essay he should’ve started yesterday.  Just like yesterday, his focus shifted completely as soon as her door creaked open and she stepped out.
Her eyes widened a bit when they landed on him, as if she was surprised to see him there at all.  He gave her a small smile, hoping to ease any nerves she likely had coming into the morning.
“Mornin’,” He hummed, his gaze fixed on her as she lingered in her doorway, seemingly unsure about leaving her room at all.  “Made a pot of coffee if you need some” 
Yes, caffeine, her body pleaded, and she nodded at him gratefully as she made her way to the kitchen.  Even as she grabbed her usual mug out of the cupboard and poured a generous amount of coffee into it, she could feel his eyes on her back.
He watches as she shuffles about the kitchen, pouring in her cream and sugar before testing the drink, then repeating the cream and sugar.  He smiles to himself as this happens a few more times.  She’s not happy with it until it’s color is milky brown, and it surely no longer tastes like coffee at all.
“Thank you” She hums when she takes a longer drink, smiling as it finally tastes perfect.
She turns to him, leaning against the counter and holding her mug carefully in both hands.  He gives her a nod, his eyes flickering over her, as though looking for any sign of discontent.  He finds none.
“Yeah,” He replies quietly.  “You sleep alright?” 
(y/n) nods back.  “You?” 
He shrugs a shoulder, his head moving from side to side with lack of a real answer.  Her lips pull into an awkward frown, not knowing what to say now.
She hates that she finds it so hard to speak to him.  It had never been like this between them before.  They’d never tiptoed around each other, conversation always came naturally.  And when they were quiet, the silence was comfortable.
The silence now feels so heavy that her chest aches.
She hates that she’s the reason for the nervous energy buzzing in the air, making her skin prick with goosebumps and her heart beat erratically.
“I, uh, I think I’m gonna go out with the twins later” She forces herself to speak, saying the first thing that comes to mind.  Even though she hadn’t explicitly made plans with the Zen’ins, she was sure they’d do her this favor.
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah,” She sighs, sounding less convincing by the second.  “Probably for drinks, I could really use a drink” She mumbles the last part.
Yuuta chuckles, his smile cracking a little further as his eyes catch the clock on the oven behind her, before looking at her again.
“Not even ten in the mornin’,” He tells her, tilting his head.  “Already need to forget today?”
Her face flushes and she tilts her head to stare down at her cup of coffee.
“That’s alright,” Yuuta brushes off her nervousness as best he could.  He just wanted her to be at ease, even if that meant pretending nothing happened between them.  “I’ve got an essay to keep me company today anyways,” He says, nodding to the scattered textbooks and notebooks before him.  “But you’ll let me know if you need a ride, or anything?”
She nods back at him, the smile on her face a little more genuine this time.
“Yeah, I will” She says, and finally makes her way out of the kitchen.
She goes to greet their fish good morning, cooing softly to the thing as it swims about it’s tank excitedly.  She gives into it’s begging, sprinkling in the smallest amount of fish flakes as she could, and cheering quietly as he strikes at the little clump of food at the surface of the water.  Yuuta tries not to stare as she murmurs and coos to the fish as though it were any other pet, a kitten, or a hamster.  But he can’t help the lurch in his heart watching her sweet talk the betta that only had the capacity to care about being hungry.  The scene truly was a testament to her character.
She finished her coffee and went about her normal routine without much else to say to him.  Yuuta tried not to mind.  He tried to focus on his essay and give her space to settle back into what felt normal.  He just hoped she’d relax sooner than later.  He’d hate to have her feel uncomfortable in her own home.
Shortly after she’d gotten in the shower, he lost focus on his project again and reached for his phone.
[yuuta] : i feel like a total fucking idiot.  i think i messed everything up.
[toge] : looked like u guys enjoyed urselves to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[yuuta] : so not what i meant. [yuuta] : she can barely talk to me.  she only just got out of bed.  she seemed so uncomfortable.
[toge] : did she seem mad? maybe she just didn’t know what to say.  it is kinda awkward
[yuuta] : i don’t think she’s mad.  I think she just regrets it
[toge] : did u bring it up?
[yuuta] : no, i don’t know how
[toge] : well did u try ‘hey we made out and i liked it, what are we?’
[yuuta] : ._.
[toge] : ok taking that as a no. [toge] : but starting w that is prlly a good idea
[yuuta] : but what if that makes it worse [yuuta] : what if she doesn’t want anything more and it was just like a one time thing yk [yuuta] : we both had a bit to drink. [yuuta] : i think i’m going to have a panic attack.
[toge] : ok slow down for a sec [toge] : you’re jumping to conclusions, remember? you can’t decide what she’s thinking bcuz you haven’t talked about it. [toge] : rn what you have control over is what you want to do about it.  So for now, just try to focus on that. [toge] : and ur essay for econ.  actually you should put most of your focus on that.
[yuuta] : ok ur right.  i’m gonna work on that now. [yuuta] : thank you.  I’ll talk to you about it later.
[toge] : :) ___
Yuuta had never felt the menacing glare of the Zen’in twins fixed on him before.  When he opens the door to find them in the hallway, clearly perturbed to be greeted by him rather than the girl they were here to escort for the evening, he felt a cold sweat form on the back of his neck.
“Hey guys-” 
“Where’s (y/n)?” Maki pushed in first, side stepping Yuuta completely and bee-lining for (y/n’s) bedroom door, which had been shut since she’d been getting ready to go out with them.
Mai gave him a sympathetic smile, and he stepped aside to let her in.
“She’s a bit on edge, don’t worry about her,” She explained her sister’s antics, something she’d grown used to doing.  “But how are you doing?” 
The simple question didn’t hold it’s usual casual tone.  Mai looked genuinely curious to know his answer.  In fact, it looked like she was taking pity on him as her brows drew together in concern.
“Uh- fine.  I’m fine,” Yuuta stammered over his answer, and quickly made his way towards the kitchen, looking for something to busy himself with.  Getting interrogated by Maki and Mai was the last thing his nerves needed right now.
Even if Maki had already barged into (y/n’s) room and shut the door behind her with a slam.  He’d perked up at the ruckus, watching the door worriedly, but it remained shut, and he didn’t hear hollering from inside, so he figured all was fine between the two, and Maki was just up to her usual untamed behavior.  Mai chuckled to herself.
“Did you want a glass of water? Or something?” Yuuta asked, already filling a cup at the sink.
“Oh no, I’m alright,” Mai shook her head and took a seat at the kitchen table.  Her eyes scan over the messy stacks of books and the long extension cord that reaches across the whole room to keep his laptop alive while he works.  “You’ve been busy, hm?”
Yuuta chokes, whirling around, not realizing she’d been commenting on his mess at the table.  He instantly flushes, especially when Mai raises a brow and her lips curl into a smirk at his reaction.
“Oh- that- yeah,” He coughs to clear the hitch in his throat, hitting his fist to his chest a few times for good measure.  “I have an essay that’s due in a week” He explains quietly, certain that she didn’t actually care what he was working on.
Mai only nods, changing the subject before he could bore her with the specifics of the assignment.
“So, what’re your thoughts on the whole thing?” 
Yuuta blinks, unsure of what she was really asking.  Mai tilts her head at him, knowing he was a smart enough guy that he could figure it out on his own.
“I don’t know…” He sighs, bringing a hand up to the back of his neck.  “I don’t know what the right thing to do is…” 
Mai giggles cutely behind her fingers, as if she’d been watching two kittens playing with a ball of yarn, rather than watch a grown man struggle with the feelings he’d carried for years.  Feelings so strong everyone around him knew damn well where his heart lied.  It was a cruel laugh, but she couldn’t help it.  Yuuta could be so pitifully hilarious sometimes.
“Sorry,” Her apology is empty when he furrows his brow at her.  “It’s just… I owe Toge money for this, you know,” 
Yuuta’s gawking now, frozen and silent as he waits for further explanation.  Had everyone been in on something he hadn’t known about? Was this all some elaborate prank on him?
“I always thought you’d make the first move.  Guess Toge knew best this time” 
“Wait, you actually bet on- he bet against me?” Yuuta stammered.  Mai smiled sweetly.
“Everyone bet against you,” She told him.  “Well, everyone but me,” She corrected right away.  “Personally, I thought it’d be a whole love confession thing, you know? Like in the movies? I always thought you were the kind of guy that just wouldn’t be able to hold it in anymore.  After last night I was sure that if (y/n/n) had a little push it’d be enough for you to do something.  But it sounds like she initiated, no?” 
Yuuta’s head was spinning taking in all of this information at once.  Everyone knew? His closest friends, and they bet against him? His face felt hot with embarrassment, and just when he thought this whole thing couldn’t get worse, too.  Damn them all for being such a close knit group of friends that nothing was private anymore.
“I… I guess…” He answered the question quietly, unsurely.  Truthfully Yuuta wasn’t sure who exactly was at fault for the situation.  (y/n) might have brought up the subject, but he was the one who kissed first, wasn’t he? “So… she told you all of it?” He asked.
Mai smirked.
“Sorry, can’t break the girl code,” She says innocently.  Yuuta rolls his eyes.  Bullshit.  She just wanted to yank his chain.  “But you’re my friend too,” She reminds him.  “So I was just curious what you thought about all this” 
Their banter was cut short by (y/n’s) door swinging open, Maki’s voice carrying out into the hall as she exited, nodding for her sister to get up to head out.
(y/n) followed shortly after, a pair of heels in one hand, her other hand occupied trying to secure a bracelet on her wrist.  With her focus on awkwardly trying to maneuver the clasp with one free hand, Yuuta was given enough time to stare at her properly.
She’d spent a lot of time holed up in her room, supposedly getting ready, and now he could see just the amount of effort she’d put into doing so.  Her hair was done up, styled in perfect soft waves that bounced when she moved, and fell around her shoulders.  A simple but pretty dress hung from tiny straps at her shoulders and fell just above her knees.  It was her favorite color and one that complimented her very well.  Yuuta had been there when she’d found it and claimed it was an ‘impulse buy’, but she’d loved it thoroughly and had worn it regularly.  He stared in awe while she struggled with the jewelry and cursed under her breath.
It took him a minute to come back to reality, blinking quickly as if he needed to refocus, before approaching her with an outstretched hand and a small smile.  She understood what he was offering from the small action.  It wasn’t the first time she’d struggled to put on her own jewelry, and she’d often turned to him for help with the dainty clasps.
Sheepishly, (y/n) placed the charm bracelet in the palm of his hand, before holding her wrist out to him.  With how close she is he can smell the flowery perfume she’d just applied before coming out of her room.  It was sweet and pretty and he swore it flooded his senses like THC, lifting him right off the floor and into the clouds.
“Thank you” She murmurs.
She watches as he carefully lifts the jewelry from both ends, securing the claw clasp between his thumb and index finger gently.  A smile lifted at the corners of his lips as the little charms dangled off the silver chain, and he recognized the bracelet.
It was a gift from him.  For the first birthday she’d celebrated since moving in together.  It wasn’t the most extravagant thing, there were no jewels, the chain was made of silver rather than rose gold or something more expensive and romantic.  The charms were a mismatched set of stars and moons, some varying in color, but most of them the same silver as the chain they dangled from.  When he’d come across it, Yuuta thought he’d struck gold.  It had been the perfect gift.  He’d seen it in the window at a jewelry store he’d never looked at twice before, but somehow this little bracelet called to him and he was waltzing right inside and purchasing it at the counter not five minutes later.  
The clerk placed it in a little velvet box, which Yuuta took home and carefully wrapped a silky white ribbon around.  It had taken some practice to tie the bow just right, but he’d been very proud of his craftsmanship.  In the days leading up to her birthday, he was sure he was going to ruin the surprise, he was so giddy with excitement.
Then when the day came, and they were all out with their friends for dinner, he was a wreck.  Everyone else’s gifts were so different from his.  Maki had given her a nice leather jacket, Mai had given her a handle of her favorite rum, and Toge had given her a new game for their switch.  When all that was left was the small gift bag holding Yuuta’s gift, he was chugging his drink as she reached into it with a grin.
The table went silent when she pulled out a tell-tale velvet box, a perfect silk bow tied around it.  Yuuta avoided her gaze when her wide eyes turned to him.  He’d missed the way her cheeks had warmed up, too embarrassed by the stares from the rest of their friends.  ‘Jewelry?’ she’d asked sweetly, before carefully untying the ribbon and propping open the box.  She’d gasped, setting the box down carefully before lifting the bracelet from it, admiring each mismatched charm dangling from it.
Her eyes lit up as she turned to him, holding it out for him with one hand, the other wrist on display as she bounced in her seat, prompting him to put it on her.  That was the first of many times Yuuta had clasped the gift carefully around her wrist.  Conversation between the twins and Toge picked up again as the pair shared a sweet, private moment.  Yuuta wasn’t sure why it was so intimate to do such a simple favor for his friend, but his skin burned where it grazed hers as he adjusted the new jewelry for her.
‘It’s beautiful,’ She’d whispered softly, her eyes fond as they gazed into his.  ‘I love it so much, thank you, Yuuta’.
As he hooked the claw through the usual hoop she always wore it at, the perfect length to keep it secure on her wrist but still let the little stars loosely dangle, Yuuta couldn’t help but think about that first time he’d put it on for her.
“There,” He hummed when it hung perfectly around her wrist.  “You’re all set now” 
His eyes lingered on the bracelet and it’s meaning that he’d never quite worked up the courage to tell her about, before flickering to meet her soft expression.  There was something in her eyes that told him she was trying to say something, but she didn’t budge on it.  Her lips curved into a small smile as she nodded at him in gratitude.
“So we’re ready?” Maki cleared her throat, drawing both of their attention over to where she had her arms crossed and a brow raised.  
(y/n) was quick to shuffle away from Yuuta, sliding on her heels and making sure the straps were adjusted just right at her ankles before giving Maki a wide smile.
“Ready!” 
She leaves with a wave and a sweet call of good luck on finishing his essay.  Yuuta lingers at the door, even long after the three have left for the night.  The creeping feeling that he’s an idiot plaguing his mind again.
It wasn’t like he could tell her not to go, that wasn’t fair.  It also didn’t seem right to tag along, he wasn’t a total moron after all, he knew that she needed some space tonight with her girlfriends to collect herself and get over what happened between them.
But god, he just hoped she wasn’t going to get over it by finding someone else to distract her from it. ___
Rather than go to the usual bar that the group would spend free evenings at, Maki and Mai had promised an all new experience for the night.  Mai talked up the place animatedly, all bright eyes and movements of her perfectly manicured hands, while Maki drove and chastised her sister for being such an annoying passenger.
The longer (y/n) spent around them, the more her nerves began to settle and she finally gave in to the excitement of going out for the night.  It had been a while since they’d done something just the three of them.  Girl time was hard to come by, and often only happened in their groupchat.  Toge and Yuuta had a way of wiggling into their plans, not that they really complained about it.  It was nice to have a close and comfortable group of friends.
But right now, (y/n) needed two things.  One, time with her favorite twins that always scored free drinks wherever they went.  And two, the free drinks that the pair were currently scoring as they chatted up the bartender.  
(y/n) watched in amusement as Maki slid her glasses onto the top of her head pulling her hair away from her pretty face, and Mai leaned over the bar on her elbows, her low cut top doing all the work for her even while she undoubtedly flirted with the tattooed man behind the bar.  The high top table (y/n) sat at with all of their purses- it wasn’t like the Zen’ins needed their wallets- was far enough away that she couldn’t hear the conversation happening, but she recognized the sweet, alluring smile on Mai’s red painted lips.  It was a flirty look, and held absolutely no bite behind the bark.  It was just a well rehearsed dance, and she knew exactly how to use it to get what she wanted.
Admittedly, it had even worked on (y/n) a few times.  So she knew that no man was strong enough to withstand it’s power.
Sure enough, the girls were already headed back to the table with three drinks between them, and proud grins on their faces as they snickered between themselves.
“Did a phone number come with these?” (y/n) teased as Maki handed her the extra cocktail.  She thanked her with a bright smile, admiring the swirls of color in the drink before she stirred it up.
“Sure did,” Mai says, flashing the napkin between her fingers, the scrawl of numbers in purple ink spread across one side.  “I think I might call this one too” She adds excitedly.
Maki and (y/n) share a laugh before the three of them raise their glasses, clinking them together gently.
A few drinks passed and (y/n) had almost forgotten why she’d even wanted to go out tonight.  It was so nice to hang out with the Zen’in twins.  There was always plenty to gossip about, and especially in a setting like this one, there was only more fuel for their fire.
While Mai went back to order their fourth round, and flirt with the bartender some more, Maki dragged (y/n) out to the dance floor.  She knew her well enough to know that three drinks was just the right amount to loosen her up and get her out there without much protest.  And just as she thought, (y/n) eagerly followed, hips already swaying to the familiar beat.
“You feelin’ better?” Maki asked, leaning in close enough so she didn’t have to yell as much over the music.  Close enough that (y/n) could smell the familiar perfume she’d been wearing since they were in high school.
“I am,” She beamed up at her friend while they danced.  “Thank you for taking me out, this is just what I needed” 
Maki smiled back at her, relieved to have helped.  Even if it was only for a few hours, she knew that this distraction was necessary to clear her mind.
(y/n) and Yuuta had been dancing the dance of friends that hadn’t realized they were infatuated with each other for so long that Maki genuinely couldn’t remember a time when their romantic tension wasn’t all consuming.  When they’d decided to move in together, she’d known it was only a matter of time before something changed between them.  They all knew, hence the bet with Mai and Toge, that living in close quarters would create a rift at some point.
It sounded like that rift was more of a dive head first into unexplored territory, and (y/n’s) panic text last night that only read ‘s.o.s yuuta and i almost hooked up and i think i’m gonna have a panic attack’ was far more than anything she could expected to happen, but it was amusing nonetheless.
And Maki loved her friends.  She loved them so much she was happy to take her out for drinks and dancing in order to relieve some of the awkward tension at home.  But her friends were morons, and when this was resolved, she planned to never let them live it down.
Because there was no doubt in her mind that Yuuta loved (y/n) with every fiber of his being.  No doubt at all that (y/n) felt just the same for him.  She’d been following him around with stars in her eyes since they were children.  And Yuuta had never treated anyone the way he treated (y/n)- like she hung the moon and stars, like his entire world revolved around her.  
They could be in a crowded room with blasting music and hollering voices, and if (y/n) was speaking, Yuuta was listening to every word with his undivided attention.  Maki had seen it, on multiple occasions.
Six drinks and two free rounds of shots from the bartender that had a crush on Mai later, and Maki was struggling to herd her sister and her friend outside and towards the car.
It was very late into the night, and even for a Friday night Maki was ready to crash and get a full night of sleep.  She should have known to start the process of leaving an hour early, because since suggesting they square up their minimal tab and heading out, an hour is how long it had taken to get the two remotely close to the door.
Mai was insistent on staying until the place closes- which wasn’t for another three hours- but Maki refused to ditch her sister at a bar at one in the morning with a guy she just met.  Free drinks or not, that crossed girl and sister code for her.
(y/n) was a different story.  Three-drink (y/n) loosened up enough to dance a bit and mingle just a little.  Six-drink-and-two-shots (y/n) was making best friends out of everyone she ran into, whether they wanted to chat or not, she found a reason to hold their attention.  One girl had cute boots, some other guy was wearing a tee shirt of a band she’d heard of- not even liked, just heard of- and now she was off again talking to someone near the bathrooms.
“She said she was gonna pee!” Maki barked, and Mai lazily turned her attention towards where Maki was glaring.  “Come on, let’s go get her.  Again” 
Knowing better than to trust Mai to follow, Maki snatches her by the wrist and drags her across the bar with her.  Mai finds this amusing and a bit ridiculous, but doesn’t fight with her.
As they grow nearer and can see (y/n’s) animated talking, they also get a better look at who it was that had stolen her attention.
“Hey wait a sec,” Mai stops in her tracks, pulling her arm out of Maki’s grip only to grab her shoulder and maneuver her body until she could follow her exact line of sight.  “Is that…?” The name doesn’t come off her tongue, but it doesn’t need to.  Maki recognizes the man she’s speaking too instantly.
And she glowers, before speeding off towards the pair at a faster, more determined rate.  This time she knows Mai will be hot on her tail.
“Naoya!” 
(y/n) and the stranger she’d been talking to both perk up.  Recognition flashes in both of them as they see the Zen’in twins stampeding towards them.  (y/n) beams, delighted to see her friends.  The handsome stranger she’d been conversing with wears a smug look as he smirks at his cousins.
“We’re leaving,” Maki said, putting herself between (y/n) and her distant cousin, staring down at her friend with a grave expression.  “Let’s go-” 
“I didn’t pee” (y/n) pouts up at her, too out of it to notice the hostility between her friend and the man she’d just met.  Maki huffs, narrowing her eyes at her as though to ask ‘really?’.  (y/n) bats her eyes up at her.
“I was just keeping (y/n) here company while she waited,” Naoya speaks up.
The Zen’in twins both spun around to glare at him as he spoke.  If (y/n) hadn’t been inebriated she may have recognized the icy stares that she’d seen many people cower away from before.  Eerily enough when directed at him, he stared back at them with his chin tilted out and a smirk on his face.
“I’m happy to wait with her if you both have somewhere to be?” He suggested.
“As if” 
“Eat shit” 
Mai and Maki spoke in unison, both of their comments jarring (y/n), who was now shielded behind them like a small child.  Naoya lifted his hands in mock surrender, and took a step away from the wall.
He caught eyes with (y/n), confused, naive, drunk (y/n), who tilted her head as he waved goodbye to her.  She weakly raised a hand to return the gesture.  Maki glared between them both as she followed the interaction.
“You’ve got my number,” He grins, his eyes staying locked on hers even while Maki and Mai’s were so sharp he could almost feel them piercing his skin.  “If you change your mind on getting over that roommate” 
Mai’s jaw dropped open as she whirled around to (y/n), a look in her eyes that was somewhere between excitement and bewilderment.  Maki snarled at the man until he finally turned around and left.  It wasn’t until then that she ushered (y/n) into the bathroom, where there was no line to begin with, as it was completely empty inside.
The loud music and crowd at the bar muffled out once they were alone in there, and (y/n) was quick to scurry into a stall.
“Fucking ridiculous,” Maki cursed under her breath, while Mai pulled herself onto the counter of sinks, swinging her feet as she laughed to herself.  “If he tries to talk to her again, I’m punching him in the goddamn teeth” 
“That guy?” (y/n) called from the stall, only to go ignored by the sisters on the outside.
“Like when we were kids?” Mai mused, a smirk curling on her lips as she recalled the distant memory.
“No,” Maki shook her head, before a slow smirk of her own formed.  “That was his nose” 
They shared a laugh, even while (y/n) continued to ask who and what they were talking about.  Naoya was a face they’d hoped they’d never have to see again, but certainly had no issue breaking if it came to it.  And knowing him, things would likely come to that.  Since birth he’d been an asshole, it seemed.  Something about being a trust fund baby and a narcissistic manipulator seemed to bring out the worst in him.
(y/n) comes out of the stall with a childish frown as she drags her feet to the sink.
“We’re talking about Naoya,” Mai says, leaning back into the mirror to speak to (y/n) while she washes her hands.  “He’s our cousin” 
“That guy out there?” (y/n) mumbles, her brows furrowing as she focuses intently on soaping up her hands.  “He’s your cousin?” 
Mai nods.
“And he’s the fucking worst,” Maki pipes up with a bark in her tone that has (y/n’s) eyes snapping to her reflection in the mirror.  Sure enough, Maki was giving her a pointed glare.  “Stay away from him (y/n), he’s a piece of shit” 
With wide eyes and her lips pressed together, (y/n) nods back at her in a small movement.
She hadn’t spoken to him too much.  He’d approached her while she was lingering at the wall trying to get her texts to go through.  She vaguely recalled him saying something about a pretty girl being alone, but she hadn’t given him much of her attention, too drunk and annoyed with her phone for not working to care.
But one thing led to another and she was complaining to him about not getting in touch with her hot roommate that she’d made things complicated with, and after he showed her how to send the message as a text rather than an imessage, he’d prodded her into telling him more about this situation-ship as he’d called it, and next thing she knew, she was talking on and on about Yuuta.
And (y/n) may have been a bit drunk, but she wasn’t oblivious.  She caught the way he told her he’d help her get her mind off of things, she noticed the smirk on his lips and the darkness in his eyes as they swept her figure.  But she didn’t care about his intentions.  She just needed to vent, to an impartial- partially impartial- party that wouldn’t tell her what everyone else was telling her.
So honestly, (y/n) had no problem ignoring the new number in her contacts.  She wasn’t looking to hook up with Naoya.  But his company was appreciated while it lasted, even if he did only stick around her in the hopes of getting laid.
“She’s not interested in him like that,” Mai tells her sister, before her eyes flit over to (y/n) as she dries her hands.  “Are you?” 
(y/n) merely shakes her head, and tosses the paper towel in the bin.
“Thought so,” Mai smirked.  “You’re still hung up on Yuu-ta~” She singsongs his name with girlish charm, and Maki cracks a small laugh, relieved to know that she didn’t have to teach her asshole cousin a lesson to keep him away from her best friend.
“That much is obvious”
“Come on,” (y/n) sighs, pulling on Mai’s arm to get her off of the counter so they could finally leave the bar.  “Let’s go home so I can sleep this off and hopefully forget all of it” 
Mai slings her arm around her waist as they leave the bathroom, the noise of the busy place drowning out all else once more.  Even as the three of them push through the crowd, with Maki leading because her presence was strong enough to part a path in any crowd, (y/n’s) thoughts are messy.  It was probably all the drinks, but she couldn’t help but feel guilty for the situation she’d put herself in.
She feels Mai’s cheek on top of her head when they near the door, and Maki opens it for the two to go through first, then follow behind.  Sometimes (y/n) thinks her friendship with the twins had developed so much that she shares some of their special twin telepathy.  Because Mai squeezes her hip and nuzzles into her hair just as her thoughts begin to spiral the longer she thinks about going home.  Mai was always affectionate when she was drunk, and maybe she was riding on a high after her score with the sexy bartender, but (y/n) appreciated it nonetheless.  She even sat with her in the backseat of Maki’s car, falling half asleep on her while leaning up against one another.
“I’m so not carrying her if she passes out,” Maki half-chides as she glares at her barely conscious sister in the backseat.  “She can spend the night back there, I don’t care, I’m tired of carrying her ass around” 
(y/n) chuckles, and laughs a little louder as Mai stirs and mutters something along the lines of ‘m not fuckin’ tired back at her.
Somehow she doesn’t pass out on top of (y/n), although her weight is heavy against her, when Maki parks at (y/n’s) apartment complex, Mai sits right up and gets out of the car.  Her and (y/n) keep their arms wrapped around each other as they head inside.  Maki rolls her eyes and occasionally scolds them for being too slow, or stumbling around and bumping into things, but her voice is soft and her hands are gentle as she guides them to the door.
Just as (y/n) is slurring over her words trying- and failing- to explain that she doesn’t have her key, the door opens and Maki is pushing the two inside.
Mai disappears from (y/n’s) side almost instantly, suddenly craving a glass of water and one of the peaches on display in a porcelain bowl on the kitchen counter.
“Pretty much what you expected, yeah?” (y/n) hears Maki say, but she’s suddenly so tired that keeping her eyes open feels like a workout.  She doesn’t even have the energy to ask her what she’s talking about.
“Yeah, pretty much,” Someone replies.  A familiar voice that was deep but soft around the edges.  An instinctive smile forms on her lips.  “Thanks for driving, though.  And for… everything else” The voice grows quieter towards the end.
And then there’s a pair of hands on her shoulders, and (y/n) nearly collapses into the embrace.  She stumbles, catching her heel at an awkward angle and nearly sprains an ankle trying to correct her stance.  But the hands are faster, and stronger, and lift her by her hips before she could fall on the bent ankle or hurt herself at all.  She’s placed right back on the ground a moment later, but the hands remain.
“Yuuta~” She greets him once she finally realizes who it is that is keeping her upright.  It was an honest mistake, with her heavy eyes and alcohol flooded system, it was easy to confuse Yuuta’s strength for Maki’s.
Yuuta chuckles quietly at her delayed acknowledgement, his thumb caressing her hip in gentle circles.
“Let’s get you some water and into bed, hm?” He hums, tugging gently on her to get her to follow him.
(y/n) stumbles along without much hesitation at all.  She’s humming a tune that had been stuck in her head after she’d heard it at the bar, and Yuuta tries not to laugh at her inebriated state, but she does make it difficult.
When he opens the door to her bedroom, they realize why it had been shut.
Mai was face down in (y/n’s) pillows, passed out cold.  Her heels had been kicked off and unceremoniously thrown onto the rug, but that was as far as she got in settling in for bed.  She was still in her dress, all of her jewelry, and most definitely was staining (y/n’s) silky pillowcases with her makeup.
“Damn, that’s another pillowcase set she owes me” (y/n) mumbles with a huff, leaning defeatedly into her door frame.
“She’s done this before?” Yuuta’s brows furrow.
(y/n) looks over at him with a frustrated pout before nodding.  He winces, but their moment of shared exasperation is quickly clouded by how funny it was that such a thing had occurred twice and they hadn’t learned from it, and soon Yuuta was ushering them both out of the doorway and into the hall so they could let her sleep in peace.
“We’ll let her stay,” He says quietly, already guiding her to the other door.  His door, she realizes distantly.  “She clearly needs the rest, you can just stay in here, alright?”
He watches the delay in her realization as she turns to face him with a concerned look on her face.  Yuuta already knows what she’s going to say before the words form in her mouth.
“Don’t worry ‘bout it,” He eases her into the room with a gentle hand on her lower back.  Her expression is still unsure, but her feet move on their own accord further into the room.  “Get somethin’ to wear out of the dresser,” Yuuta instructs, knocking his knuckle against the drawer he kept his sleepwear in.  “I’ll go let Maki know she can stay with Mai if she wants” 
(y/n) gives him a small nod before he leaves the room, shutting the door behind him.  
It felt odd being in his room, not because it was unfamiliar to her, she actually spent plenty of time lounging in his room with him, but it was odd being there without him.  Especially when she’d been asked to change, and into his clothes no less.  
Her movements were hesitant as she opened the drawer he’d pointed to.  The wood creaked out and put his clothes on their perfect, organized display.  She let out a small laugh through her nose at how crisp his tee shirts were folded, and similarly, the even rolls of sweatpants beside them.  It was almost ridiculous how perfect it all looked.  But she couldn’t be surprised.
It almost felt wrong to pluck out a tee shirt and pair of sweats and unfold them, but suddenly her wrinkled skirt and the straps that didn’t want to stay in place on her shoulders were enough of a bother for her to unzip the irritating material and let it drop to the floor.
Yuuta’s clothes smelled like him.  Which shouldn’t have been something that surprise her as much as it did, pausing as she tugged the tee shirt down, dipping her nose against the loose collar and inhaling the familiar scent of pine and the laundry detergent they shared, creating a fragrance that was so distinctly Yuuta she could recognize it in a second.
She tied the drawstrings of the sweatpants in a double knot to keep them from sliding back off her hips, and that was when there was a knock on the door.
“Come in” She called quietly, aware of the sleeping girl in the next room over.  Although a tornado couldn’t stir Mai from the drunken slumber she was in.
Yuuta opened the door slowly, trying to keep it from creaking, before he entered the room.
He tried not to stare, he really did, but he couldn’t help but smile at the way his clothes blanketed her, and just how cute she looked in them.  It wasn’t necessarily the first time she’s worn his clothes, there had been plenty of times where he’d lent her his jacket, or a spare tee shirt in high school when she’d spilled milk on her blouse, and those times had felt special too, but now felt… significant.
Seeing her wrapped up in his pajamas in his room while getting ready to go to sleep in his bed, Yuuta’s grinning at her while her face is going pink with embarrassment.
“Maki went home,” He cleared his throat, trying to remember the conversation he’d just had before he walked in here and had his mind wiped of all logical thought.  “She said she’ll pick Mai up in the morning” 
“Alright then,” (y/n) nodded in understanding.  “Oh, and can I borrow a-” 
“Your shoes are still on,” 
Yuuta’s voice is soft as he cuts her off, vaguely pointing to where her strappy heels poked out under the pool of fluffy cotton at her feet.  She looks down as though confused by the statement, but sure enough she realizes she hadn’t taken them off when she’d dropped her dress and stepped into the sweats.
She giggles to herself and lifts a leg, the excess fabric of his pants hanging off her ankle so she could be sure her heels were in fact still on her feet.
“Here,” Yuuta reaches out, guiding her to sit on the edge of his bed.  She follows, but just before she could lean over to undo the small buckles at her ankles, Yuuta was already kneeling to the ground before her.
(y/n’s) certain that her mistake from the night prior is the only reason that she feels a swell in her chest and an intimate tension settle in the air around them.  Because there’s no other reason she should feel her heart racing and her face going hot as he carefully unlatches the buckle of the left shoe and slides the strap out before pulling the shoe away and dropping it to the floor.  There’s no reason why she should feel butterflies fluttering around her tummy as he follows the same procedure for the right one.
But she does.  She feels her blush and the butterflies and the dryness in her throat as the tension sucks all of the oxygen right from her lungs.  And when he looks up at her with a sweet smile, surely happy to have helped, all of those feelings seem to be put under a magnifying glass.
“Better?” He asks with that damn smile.
Against her will, her mind wanders to how soft and warm that smile had felt when it was pressed against her mouth.  How firm and gentle and experienced his mouth felt when it kissed hers.  Her fingers dig into the plush comforter she sat on, trying to ground herself to reality, as far away from that memory as she could get.
She gives him a small nod.
“What did you want to borrow?” He asks as he stands, and her eyes follow his as he’s suddenly so easily towering over her.  She almost had no idea what he was talking about, and she’s quick to release her hold on the blanket.
“Right- um- could I borrow one of your blankets? Mai is on top of all of-” 
Yuuta’s chuckling makes her halt in her explanation, her brows barely pinching together in question at the reaction.
“You don’t need to sleep on the couch (y/n/n), you can stay in here, I already told you that,” 
She presses her lips together as she regards him, trying to find any source of discomfort or regret.  He seems to pick up on her evaluation, and he raises a brow as he chuckles at her.
The sound feels all too delighted, like he was amused by her hesitation.
“(y/n), it’s fine, you’re overthinking,” He tells her.  “I’ll get you a glass of water, m’kay? Just… get comfortable.  You’ve slept in here tons of times before” 
He leaves the room before she could say what they were both thinking.  Not like this.  She’d accidentally napped in here on a few occasions, waiting too long for him to be done studying, or when her bedding was in the wash and she had grown tired after a day of chores, she wasn’t a stranger to his bed.  But just as she wasn’t a stranger to his room, it still felt all too new right now.
Like if she moved too quickly she might break something intangible yet oh so fragile.
Nonetheless, she shuffles into the bed and under the covers, and her hazy mind begins to settle as soon as she rests her head on one of Yuuta’s feathery pillows.  She wonders if everything he surrounded himself with- his clothes, his blankets, his pillows- was comfortable because he valued comfort, or if it simply was because it was all his.  Because it was an extension of him.
But maybe she was still just a bit drunk and overthinking the fluffy warmth surrounding her.  Maybe he was right about that part.
She’d just been drifting off to sleep when the door opened again, and she peeks her eyes open as Yuuta brings a glass of water over to the bedside table she laid next to.
“Try to drink all that tonight, alright?” His voice is a hum, surrounded by softness, and comfort, and she’s reaching for that question in the back of her mind again, prodding at it until she’s a little less sleepy, her curiosity stirring her mind enough to keep it active.
“Alright,” She murmurs back, leaning up on her elbow as she reaches for the glass, delighted to see it was chilled with ice.  “Thank you” She adds before taking a few sips.  Her dry throat had gone unnoticed until the first touch of water to her tongue, and suddenly she’s drinking down half the glass.
The bed dips behind her as Yuuta settles in, sighing to himself quietly as he gets situated.  (y/n) quickly sets the glass back down, before turning over to face him.
In the dark room she vaguely makes out his silhouette, and she can’t tell if he’s looking at her or not, so maybe it’s what helped ease her nerves as she laid before him.
“Did you have a good night?” He breaks the silence first, but he keeps his voice quiet.
“Yeah, I guess so,” (y/n) mumbles back, her fingers finding a loose thread in his sheets.  “It was fun dancing with Maki and Mai…” She wraps the thread around the tip of her middle finger.
“You sound disappointed” Yuuta comments, hooking his arm under his pillow so he could get a slightly better read on her expression, but the shadows cast over her features are too dark for him to decipher.
But he can feel it when she shrugs one of her shoulders and hums in a way that sounds like I don’t know.
“It was alright, it was, I just…” She tries to explain it, but as she speaks the rest of the words just don’t come to mind.  It had been fine, it had been fun even, nothing wrong had happened, but it didn’t quite feel… “I think I just thought my tendency of drinking to forget was the right way to go, but I don’t think it worked, and I think I’m only going to feel worse,” 
It was word vomit through and through, an endless stream of thoughts flowing right out of her mouth before she could think twice about what she was saying or how it might make him feel.  But the cusp of the issue was right there and she was dying to understand the complicated knot of feelings swelling in her chest.
“I think I made a mistake,” She slows down as she says this, and Yuuta wishes she would’ve ripped off the bandaid, but at least she couldn’t see it when he frowned at her.  “But not- not for what you think, I don’t mean it… like that,” She stammers a bit as she tries to correct herself, the alcohol still in her system doing her no favors besides the minor boost in courage.  “But I… I don’t think I could handle it” She says in a small voice.
She’s quiet for a bit as she tightens the thread around her finger, barely able to make out the way it creases and dips into her skin.
“Well…” Yuuta sighs, struggling to find the right thing to say to her.  
What could he say? He could tell her the truth, unpack all of his feelings, his entire heart, right here, but at the end of the day wouldn’t that just make things more complicated? She wasn’t exactly sober, and if she didn’t feel remotely the same way then he dug himself a socially awkward grave that he’d just have to live in because damn it they split the rent.  He’s panicking, breaking into a cold sweat even under two blankets.
“It was just a kiss, yeah?” He repeats what she’d told him just last night.  But unlike the confident, smug way she’d phrased it, he sounds unsure, and maybe even frightened.
Her head moves, and he still can’t make out the direction of her gaze, but he can still feel her eyes on him.  He tries to focus his vision better, hoping to adjust to the darkness soon.
“If it was just a kiss I don’t think I would’ve felt compelled to go out and try to forget it happened,” (y/n) replies, her voice hushed, afraid of revealing too much.  “I’m just really sorry” 
Yuuta blinks a few times, as if that would help him figure out if he heard her right.
“You don’t have to apologize, (y/n),” He tells her, his voice taking on a more serious tone.  “You have nothing to be sorry for, you didn’t do anything wrong-” 
“I made things so weird and over- over some dumb advice from Maki- and I just can’t believe I managed to find a way to make our friendship weird because- because you mean a lot to me, you’re really my best friend, Yuuta” 
He can’t tell if his heart swells with love or bursts with the sting of rejection at the statement.
“You’re overthinking again,” He forces a light chuckle, before reaching out and gently wrapping his hand over hers.  “It’s not that weird, alright? Nothing could change… us… okay?” 
She doesn’t say anything, just sighs in disappointment while his thumb brushes over the back of her hand.
“You mean a lot to me too, you know that,” He tried to lighten the mood, but with barely seeing her face it was hard to tell how she was feeling.  “It was just a kiss, alright? Just a… really nice kiss” 
“A few really nice kisses,” She mutters under her breath, finally cracking a small laugh.  Yuuta beams back at her, unable to stop himself from giggling back at her.
It grows quiet between them after a few minutes, but this time it’s comfortable, and she feels her muscles untense as she sinks further into the mattress.
“I did complain about you, though” 
“Complain?” Yuuta pouted.  “To the Zen’ins? They’ll use that against me, you know” 
(y/n) giggles, knowing full well that if she’d told the twins one foul thing about Yuuta they’d grab him by the ankles and dangle him right off this apartment building until he apologized to her.  But she shakes her head at him.
“No, no not to them.  Some guy at the bar,” She explains.  “Their cousin, actually,” 
He racks his brain for a minute, trying to recall who this cousin is, but he can only think of Megumi, and everyone knew Megumi, so had she run into Megumi, she would’ve said so, wouldn’t she? But no, she said some guy.
“Got his number, too,” She adds, but she sounds defeated, like it wasn’t a victory to get a cute stranger’s number at a bar when she’d specifically gone out seeking a distraction.
Something odd twists in Yuuta’s gut.  The jealousy was distinct, but the pride in picking up on the fact that she hadn’t been interested in this mysterious Zen’in relative.
“Maki said he’s a dick, though,” She explained her lack of interest.  “But he was sure happy to put up with my troubles” 
Yuuta lets out a humorless laugh.  “Who wouldn’t listen to a pretty girl at a bar rant about her problems?” He asks, and he can’t quite see it but he knows she rolls her eyes at him.  “But since you got that number complaining about me, that makes me a wingman, right?” 
She snorts back at him.
“Not in the slightest” 
“No?” He frowns.  “Why not?” 
“For one, you weren’t there, you can’t be a wingman if you’re not present,” She explains, matter-of-factly.  “And for two, I don’t think telling a guy how annoying it is that my hot roommate has been walking around in a towel and getting in my head really is all that deserving of me getting a phone number.  I don’t think that booty-call was going to lead anywhere other than the bathroom stall” 
Yuuta crinkled his nose at the descriptive language, before backtracking and perking up at the other part.
“Did you say I’m hot?” 
Realization flashes in her eyes, and Yuuta thanks whatever deity is up there that he can finally make out her features in the dark room.  When she doesn’t immediately reply, his lips curl into a grin.
“You did!” He teases, and she yanks her hand out of his gentle hold, only for him to poke at her face playfully.  “You said-!” 
“Hush,” She shushes him with irritation.  “You’ll wake up Mai.  And- and that’s not a big deal.  You compliment me all the time” 
Her face is burning, and the smile that threatens to take over her face is beginning to win.
“Shut up, that’s totally different,” He murmurs, and moves closer to her when she tries to shrink away out of embarrassment.  “You called me your hot roommate.  And apparently you’re getting bothered over a towel? Is me being shirtless that upsetting?” 
“I’m not doing this with you right now-” 
“Oh no, come on, you have to now,” Yuuta pleads, his voice still that annoyingly sexy teasing tone.  (y/n) turns to push her face into her pillow, and he wiggles closer again, eager to hear what else she’d had on her mind.  “Come on, what else did you have to complain about?” 
“I complained that you’re annoying,” She whines, her voice muffled by the pillow.  Yuuta chuckles.  “And I complained about how you don’t know how much you…” She trails off, and her voice goes impossibly quieter.  “Bother me” She finishes in a mumble to the pillow.
He hears it perfectly clear.
His face feels hot, and there’s a familiar little tingle in his stomach.  But he smirks at her hiding form.
“Well what else, then?” He asks.
(y/n) rolls her head to the side, pressing her cheek back into the pillow as she looks over at him.
“What do you mean?” She asks.
“What else bothers you?” He clarifies his question.
She giggles as she shakes her head at him.
“No way” 
“Yes way,” Yuuta laughs back at her.  “Come on, tell me” 
“No!” She protests again in a hiss.  “Am I not embarrassed enough already? I’m taking this to my grave” 
“No you’re not,” Yuuta scoffs.  “Come on, you tell me everything, so, tell me” 
She supposed he had a point.  A dumb one, but a point nonetheless.  Clearly at some point or another she was bound to indulge him on this.  Even though she couldn’t explain it, she was always driven to share every part of herself with Yuuta.  Even when it was embarrassing.  Even when it was intimate.
(y/n) may have told the Zen’in twins about the rushing-out-of-the-shower thing, but that hadn’t meant there weren’t other instances where her mind crossed the platonic boundary between her revolving thoughts of Yuuta.  That was just the first occurrence she assumed they could understand.
She huffs.
“Sometimes you wear your tee shirts a size too small,” She mumbles.
Yuuta wants to tease her, maybe crack a joke, but he keeps his mouth shut as she gives in.  He didn’t want to miss a single word.  He had to pay close attention so he knew exactly how to get under her skin in all the right ways.  Hearing that she found him hot was one thing, he could pass it off as a joke or an empty compliment.  Hearing that there were specific things that he did that made her sexually frustrated? He couldn’t mess this up for himself.
“And when you drive me places, you do that thing with your arm when you back the car up” She adds.
“What do you mean?” He questions that one with a furrowed brow.
“You know,” She mumbles, weakly lifting her arm to demonstrate, bending it behind her head.  He shakes his head, not understanding in the slightest.  “You always grab the back of my seat and look over your shoulder,” She tries to put it into words.  “And then, it’s just, like-” The words fail her again as she continues the motion with her arm.  Yuuta thinks he gets what she’s trying to explain, but he has no idea that such a mundane action was a bother for her.
“That turns you on?” He tries not to laugh, but then (y/n’s) face goes red and she’s trying to deny it.
“I didn’t say that!” She squeaks out.  “I just, you know, forget that I’m not supposed to… thinkaboutyoulikethat” She rushes the confession out as fast as she can.
“I… think that’s pretty normal,” Yuuta admits quietly.  (y/n) blinks wide eyes at him, waiting for him to continue.  “And if anything, I’m flattered,” He adds with a grin.
“Yeah, yeah,” (y/n) huffs, before wiggling closer, pressing her forehead into his chest before sighing, sleepiness overcoming her.  “Not a word of this to anyone else” She mutters.
Yuuta mock whines as he wraps an arm around her back, tucking her closer against him.  He pretends not to notice when her nose nuzzles into his tee shirt, in the middle of his chest.  He pretends not to notice when her hand slips across his abdomen and over his waist.
“I think about you too,” He murmurs, resting his chin on top of her head.  Her fingers twitch on his hip, almost tickling him.  He tries not to wiggle, he doesn’t want her to think he’s uncomfortable.  “For the record” 
“You do?” She mumbles, half asleep already, but too curious about what he meant by that.
“Mhm” He hums, his hand trailing down her spine and then back up again, the gentle touch of his fingers warming her up, making her melt further into him.
“Like when?” She asks, and when he doesn’t reply right away, she lets out a sigh.  “Come on, I told you!” She whined.  “Now you have to tell me some embarrassing stuff, too” 
“Alright, that’s fair,” Yuuta agreed.  “I like when you wear that dress” He says.  (y/n) beams against his chest.
“That one?” She mumbles, weakly gesturing to the pool of fabric on his floor.  He nods back at her.
“Mhm,” He confirms quietly.  “I know it’s your favorite.  It should be” He smiles to himself.  (y/n) giggles quietly, the soft vibrations hitting his chest and warming his skin.
“Tell me more” She mumbles, the words barely audible.  Yuuta knows that she’s going to pass out soon.  Her breathing was beginning to slow, and her chest rose and fell in steady movements.  Surely he could leave this conversation as it is and she’d be fast asleep in a minute or two anyhow.
“Well,” He sighs out the word, as if he had to pick his own brain to come up with more examples, as if every little thing she did wasn’t enough to catch his eye on it’s own.  “Maybe things are a lil’ different now, hm?” He hums.
(y/n) doesn’t respond.  For a second, he thinks maybe she’s finally fallen asleep, but just as he contemplates checking, her head moves in a small nod.  A silent, barely-there admission.
“I like the way you kiss,” He says, and she can hear the smile in his voice, the cheeky but all-too shy little grin that she’s grown so accustomed to.  She gives him another giggle, a breathless little laugh that makes her shoulders shake and her nose press into the collar of his shirt.  “It’s true, I mean it,” Yuuta said, a quiet laugh escaping him as well.  Partially due to her laughter infecting him, partially out of the relief that maybe talking about what happened would help them both to not feel so weird about it now.  “You’re a good kisser, you should be proud.  I for one feel honored” 
He’s teasing, she knows that, but her face still feels warm as she keeps it tucked away in his chest, hoping that her heart wasn’t beating so rapidly that he could hear it in the quiet room.
“You’re a good kisser, too,” Her words are more slurred than before, Yuuta can practically hear her losing consciousness as she drifts off.  “Really good kisser” She adds under her breath.
And then her head feels a little heavier on his chest, and Yuuta doesn’t have to check to know she’s asleep in his arms.  He’s exhausted and he knows he should close his eyes and try to sleep, too.  But it feels too nice to hold her close, so he hangs onto consciousness for as long as he can.
Before his body’s tiredness finally takes over, he brushes his lips over the crown of her head, and settles into his pillow with his arms securely wrapped around her, making sure that she stays close while he sleeps.
___
xoxo ~ jordie
364 notes · View notes
justmeinadaze · 1 year
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Aftercare (Steddie Ask)
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A/N: This an ask by @corrodedcorpses <3. She wanted something where the reader didn't know what aftercare was so the boys showed her after an instance with her boyfriend or a partner. It intrigued me! You always give me interesting ones, mama, that I can connect with! Lol I seriously didn't know what aftercare was until I started reading smut. All my exes never did it and I always felt like ugh after they would leave.
I hope I did you proud!
Warnings: Light smut (she said I could :D ), more so Steddie looking after her, there are mentions of the aftermath when her boyfriend leaves (bruised wrists, welts from a belt), Steve mentions her bleeding and Eddie gets protective, reader is stuck in a little/submissive headspace
Word Count: 2555
Steve tossed Eddie some movies on the couch as he shuffles off his Family Video vest and slams his body exhaustedly onto the adjacent sofa.
“You’re films you requested, my liege.”
“Cool, man. Thank you.”
“No problem. Where is Y/N?”
Eddie’s eyes shift towards the closed door of your bedroom. “With her idiot.”
“I thought they broke up.”
“Yeah, well, I guess not.”
The door suddenly opens, your boyfriend adorning a huge grin. “I’ll see you later, Y/N! Have a good night, boys.”
They both respond with an aggressive hm as Steve gets up to follow him out and lock the door behind him. “Fucking prick.”
“I can hear you; you know!”
“Good because I wasn’t hiding it!” 
“Hey, sweetheart. You want to watch a movie?!”
“Not tonight, Eds! I don’t… feel so hot.”
They glance at each other at your change of tone. They had known you since high school and since you guys had agreed to move in together, you all had learned each other’s little quarks. You always seemed to have a smile on your face especially around them but in every one of your relationships, you appeared to become more and more lethargic. 
You confided in them once that you felt like there was something wrong with you. 
“Maybe I’m not meant to be happy in a relationship.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Of course, you are, honey.” Steve couldn’t believe what he had heard. 
“Any man would be lucky to have you, princess.”
“Please, you have to say that because you’re my friends.”, you giggle.
Eddie rose from the couch as both boys headed to your room. It was oddly darker than normal and Steve flipped the switch to turn on your white Christmas lights you usually had on above your bed. Your clothes they remembered you wearing that day were tossed around on the floor but you appeared to be clothed insomething since they could see the light reflecting off the silk against your skin. You were laying on your side as the blanket covered you up to your waist. You seemed incredibly small and it scared them a bit. 
“What’s wrong, Y/N? You’re feeling sick?”
“No, Stevie. Just… tired.”
“Y/N, did that fucking asshole hurt you?” You both turned to look at Eddie as Steve followed his eyeline. Your wrists were starting to swell where you had pulled at the handcuffs that were currently hidden in your dresser. “I’m gonna fucking kill him.”
“No! No, no, no.” You quickly got up, running after him as he started heading for the front door. “No. It’s… it’s not what you think.”
“Honey, you’re bleeding.” 
You try to look at your behind, wincing as you sigh. “He hit me a bit too hard. NO!” Eddie starts to head for the door again as you grab his arm. “I…I wanted this. Fuck.” The metalhead’s arms shoot out to catch you as your knees buckle. “I feel really heavy and…”
“A little clingy?” As you found yourself still stuck in your little girl headspace, Eddie’s protective grasp around you had you feeling safe. You couldn’t help but nuzzle your face into his chest as you nodded. Both men look at each other with a mutual understanding of what’s going on.
“What fucking prick doesn’t do aftercare after something like this?”, Steve asks.
“What’s that? After care?”
Both sets of eyes widen at your question. “Y/N, you’re telling us, you want to do things like this but no one has ever taken care of you after?”
“Well, that stops today.” Eddie lifted you into his arms and carried you towards your bathroom. “Harrington, take over really quick, I have some first aid stuff in my room. I’ll be right back.”
Steve sits on the edge of your tub as he looks up at you with admiration. “Do you think you can stand for a shower or do you want to take a bath?” He sees something flash through your eyes that seems like trepidation. “Hey. You’re still in that headspace?” You gently nod your head. 
“That’s ok, sweet girl. That’s perfectly alright. Did you want to ask me something?”
“If…if I take a bath, will you sit with me?”
He tenderly smiles as he pulls you into his embrace. “Yeah, honey, I can do that. You can ask me and Eddie anything you want to, okay? We love you.” You grin with giddy pride at his last sentence. “This is gorgeous by the way. Did you buy it?”
Your hands fly down to run along the silk nightie you had forgotten you were wearing. “I did. It came with these cute panties and stockings. I don’t like those though. The mesh feels weird on my feet.”
“Hm, I bet. What do you like?”
You shrug as he lifts the garment over your head. “What do you like?”
“Honestly, I’m not a big fan of extras like stockings.” The pads of his fingers glid up your leg to the middle of your thigh. “I like to be able to feel my girl’s skin.” He grinned as you blushed. 
After turning off the water, he held your hand as he guided you into the tub. You flinched as you slowly lowered your behind into the warmth, your eyes darting to his after you were seated, waiting patiently for him to join. 
A pleasure filled sigh left your lips as he gradually removed every item of clothing he was wearing. You had seen both of them without a shirt numerous times but seeing him now was sending a different kind of electricity through your body. When he removed his boxers, your breath caught in your throat. He was much bigger than you expected him to be.
“Wow. Didn’t take you long to get naked, huh, Harrington?”, Eddie grinned as he entered the bathroom. Steve made a face at the boy before climbing in behind you, pulling your shoulders back so you could lean against his chest. “I got my first aid kit laid out on your bed with some comfy clothes. I was thinking after we take care of you here, if you’re feeling up to it, we could order a pizza and watch a movie.”
You smile up at him as he takes a seat on the corner of the tub so he can face you both. 
“Is it ok if I ask you some questions?” You nod your head to the metalhead’s question as Steve delicately runs his palms over your arms. 
“You said you wanted this. Wanted what exactly?”
“I like…being controlled.”, your eyes look down in shame.
“Princess, look at me. There’s no judgement here. You’re safe with us, ok? Can you repeat my last sentence back to me?”
“I’m safe with you.”
“Good. Good girl, baby.” His words with the proceeding smile made your body shiver. 
“Now you like to be controlled but it seems like the idiots you’ve been with haven’t been doing it right if you don’t know what aftercare is. It’s extremely important after playing like that.”
Your eyes meet his as your bottom lip trembles. “I just thought there was something wrong with me. That’s why…I feel like this after…like I’m broken or something.” 
Steve’s arms wrap around you as he pulls you closer to him, kissing the top of your head. Your gaze shifts between them as you feel the love they have for you radiating off them. You ARE safe.
“He hits me too hard sometimes. It makes me feel like trash especially when he just leaves after.”
“You’re not trash and you’re NOT broken.”, Eddie growls. “I fucking hate that guy. Fucking every guy you date is a fucking imbecile. I swear—”
“Can I kiss you?” His head straightens up as his brown eyes look at yours in confusion. “I’m sorry. Was that…to much? I just… seeing and hearing you both be so protective and caring…watching your lips move…I just wanted to kiss you.”
The metalhead smiles as he all but jumps into the bath making you laugh as he carefully straddles his knees on either side of both your legs. His palms grip your cheeks as he brings his lips to yours. It was a delicate kiss; careful to not cross a line but you desperately wanted more as soon as he pulled away. 
“How are you feeling now, Y/N? Starting to feel a little better?”, Steve asks, smiling as you nod your head. You were feeling so much better in fact that you grew bolder, leaning back to place your lips on his. When you pulled away, his kisses trailed up your jawline and down to your shoulder.
“How…how do you guys know about this stuff?”
“Aftercare? Because we’re fucking gentlemen.” You laughed at Eddie’s statement making them both grin seeing the personality they were used to slowly pushing through. “Sweetheart, even if you weren’t into the rougher stuff, who wouldn’t want to hold you and spend time with you after?”
He kisses your forehead before rising to his feet, water cascading from his now soaked attire. 
“Really? At least take off your clothes before stepping out so you don’t trench her floor.”
“I think you just want to see me naked, Harrington.” Eddie winks as he slides his shirt over his head and yanks down his shorts with his boxers, tossing them to the far corner of your tub. 
Jesus. How could both your friends be so well endowed and you have no idea. The metalhead reaches for your hands but pauses before you can reach up for them. 
“Is this okay? Do you feel comfortable touching me while I’m naked? I can go grab boxers or here! Maybe Steve’s will fit—”
Your palms grip his as you pull yourself up. “Eddie, it’s fine. I trust you.”
The man smiles as he reaches for a towel and dries you first before himself, tossing it to his friend to utilize as he guided you back to your bedroom. He sat on the bed as he placed you in front of him, turning you around so he can see the wounds on your behind.
You hear his breathing stutter as you feel the pads of his fingers trace down your sides. “I’m sorry. I just…you’re really fucking beautiful. I mean…I always thought you were…gorgeous…I just—”
Turning back to face him, you kiss his lips again, this time with much more vigor than before. 
“Wait, wait. F-fuck.” Eddie pants as his tongue runs along his lips. “I can’t…we can’t…not right now, Y/N. Let us…let us look after you tonight and then tomorrow…we’ll see how you feel.”
You nod as you adjust your body back to the way he had set it, finding Steve leaning against the bathroom doorframe. 
“What do you think, Ed? Maybe, we can at least reward her for being so honest with us.”
“I don’t see how that would be a problem. Just don’t move her to much so I can finish cleaning and bandaging these cuts here. Baby, what did he hit you with?”
“Belt.”
Eddie grumbled under his breath as Steve fell to his knees in front of you. You hiss as the man behind you starts his task, your hands promptly shooting out to grip the other boy’s shoulders. 
“Hey, whoa. It’s ok. I got you.”, he coos as his own palms grip your waist. “I got you, honey. Is it alright if I touch you while Munson does his thing? I can wait if you want me to.”
You adamantly shake your head as you run your hands through his hair. “Please, touch me.” Grabbing one of his huge palms off your hip, you take his fingers and guide them through your folds. “Here.”
Steve sucks in his bottom lip as he feels how wet you are, bringing his fingers to his mouth.
“Fuck me…you taste so fucking good. Eddie, you have to taste her.”
They gently shuffle you forward so the metalhead can kneel down behind you, opening your legs a bit wider as his face presses between you to push his tongue into your entrance.
“Eddie…”, you moan before the other boy follows his lead; mouth wrapping around your clit. 
The metalhead leans back as reaches for the bandages to cover your cuts on your ass. “Y/N, princess, seriously… fuck those other guys. Fuck… I’ve never tasted anything so sweet before.” He hurriedly finished what he was doing before sliding his own fingers between your puffy lips into your entrance. 
His forehead leans against your back as you whimper at the feeling of his massive digits stretching you open. You turned to look down at him when you heard him spit, wetting his hand as he stroked his length. 
“Is…is this ok?” Eddie slightly smiles when you nod, your fingers tangling in Steve’s hair as tongue flicks against your much more aggressively. “You’re so fucking tight, pretty girl. Jesus.”
Steve’s head suddenly leans against your tummy as you watch him fold into himself.
“Fuck me…”, he pants as you notice the sheen of his cum on his belly. 
He glances up at you for a brief moment before diving back into your cunt with much more determination. You groan their names, your legs giving in as you cum. Steve catches you, slowly guiding you to your knees as Eddie keeps fingering you through your orgasm. The man reaches for tissue on your bedside table, cleaning himself as the metalhead grunts and spirts of his seed land on his thigh. 
He thanks him as his friend hands him the extra tissue he pulled for him. It takes them a few moments before they realize you’re lying on your side against the floor. You feel your body lightly jostle as panties are slide up your legs. Steve lifts you by your arms to a sitting position so Eddie can throw his shirt over your head. 
“How are you feeling now, sweetheart?”, he whispers as you lean your cheek against his shoulder. 
“Safe…calm…” You nuzzle your nose into his neck. “Loved.”
Steve grins, his eyes shifting between you both as he leans up on his elbow. “Good. Because we love you. Now…you can tell that prick that he needs to do this with you every time.”
“What? What prick?”, you ask genuinely confused. 
“Your boyfriend.”, Eddie answers in sullen tone.
“Oh. I… I thought that… was this just a one-time thing? I don’t want it to be.”
“Honey, I don’t want it to be either.”
“Me either and, baby, trust me. We can give you want you want without making you feel the way you’ve been feeling.” You giggle at him as he winks, pulling your head to his lips. “Now, again, I know Harrington just wanted to see me naked but I would like to at least put on some pants so we can watch some spooky movies and eat some food.”
Steve whines as he rises to his feet and lifts you off the floor as Eddie follows. “Does it have to be scary? Can’t we watch like Sixteen Candles or some shit?”
“I like how you asked that like you didn’t bring me those movies from your store.”
“Stevie brought me Fatal Attraction a few days ago. I still haven’t watched it.”, you grin.
“Oooo… sex mixed in with a thriller. Everyone wins!”
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