#like they start out with these good character concepts

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for killing my character and quitting a D&D game I was part of?

Apologies in advance but this is going to be rather long, I'll put a TL;DR at the bottom.

So this all started about eleven months ago when I (14, she/they/he) started getting into D&D, and joined a D&D group thanks to a friend of mine we'll call T (14, he/they). The group was made up of about five people total, but the main people in this situation are me, T, and the DM who we'll call N (15, he/him).

Now when I was making my character, T was helping me out by letting me describe what sort of character I wanted and suggesting different races, classes etc to make it work how I wanted, and what we ended up with was a Pact of the Undead warlock. The backstory of my character was that their older brother died defending them from an invasion of the village they lived in.

My character managed to make contact with their spirit in the afterlife and formed a "pact" with them, gaining power in exchange for letting him "look after them" (i.e. keep watch over them from the afterlife, protect them from harm, all that sorta thing). T told me to run the final concept past N but that they were sure it'd be allowed and that the pact idea was really sweet.

So I told N about my character and the backstory idea like T suggested and N seemed really on board with the whole thing, though he wanted to make a few slight changes to things in secret that would come up during the campaign, to make things more exciting I guess.

I told him I was alright with that, as long as nothing about who the pact was with and what it was for changed too much. He assured me that it wouldn't and that he'd get back to me on what changes he was planning, but he never did, and at the time I just put that down to him being busy.

The campaign starts, and for the first few months things are going pretty good. I do notice that a lot of NPCs, in fact nearly every non-child NPC, seems to be flirting(?) with my character, but I don't think too much of it at first, she is a young elven woman with blonde hair and silver eyes and everyone in the group has said that she's very pretty.

It isn't until one of the others who is also playing an elven character points out that they've been on the receiving end of essentially racism towards elves from NPCs who have simultaneously been showering my character with compliments that I start realizing how frequent and honestly rather obsessive it is, and as mentioned, just how many of the NPCs are doing it.

Then we get to T's character arc, exploring his character's backstory and helping them with things that come up. However, there are certain characters that are introduced that, out of character, T reacts rather negatively to, and when I ask him outside of session what's going on he confides in me that N is changing elements of his backstory that he'd told him he didn't want changing. As an example, T wrote that their character's mother was never part of their character's life growing up.

One of the characters we met was the character's mother, who was instead apparently a very prominent part of their life and cared greatly about them "not that they ever noticed". He also changed the character of T's father from "kind and caring man who did his best to raise his child alone and teach them how to defend themselves" to "stubborn, angry and neglectful father that is constantly disappointed in his son", which completely blindsided and upset T.

T also said that he'd tried talking to N about this but that the response had ended up being, to put it bluntly, "I'm the DM so I have the final say in things". This started to worry me, especially when I realized that N had never gotten back to me with his "proposed changes" to my backstory.

So I sent him a message, but because I didn't want to drag T into my own business with N I decided to say something along the lines of "hey, did you ever figure out what you wanted to change about my backstory?". He messaged back and said that he'd figured it out, but that things with school were so busy that he hadn't had time to sit down and properly write it all out to send to me yet, but assured me that he would by the time T's arc was over.

Several more months passed with no further word from N about my character's backstory, and as T's arc wraps up there's this idea that starts getting brought up, of how demons often exploit the grief of mortals to latch onto them and claim their souls by impersonating the dead person.

The others in the group all latch onto this and start speculating about how exactly the demons use impersonation to claim souls, except for T who gives me this rather worried look from across the table, and it suddenly hits me that this is probably meant to be the opening of my character arc.

I pull N aside after the game is over for the night and ask him directly if this is the opening to my character arc, and he says that it is, but not to worry because the demon thing is, to quote, "just being brought up to get the others interested". I remind him about what I told him about not wanting anything to change about who the pact was with and what it was for, and ask him again what changes he's made to my backstory.

He promises he'll have a full list to me by the start of next session, that we'll have time to sit down together and discuss it all even, and that he won't do anything I don't want him to do. Despite my concerns and the fact that he has already said several times he'll send me this list without doing it, I decide, like a fool, to trust him, even though in hindsight I had absolutely no reason to by this point.

The next session rolls around, and of course there's no list, instead a lot of NPCs who start voicing concern whenever my character brings up the fact she's a warlock, or her dead brother, especially if the pair come up in quick succession. One of the other characters figures out what's going on and asks if they can basically cast some sort of spell to determine if a demon's got control of my soul, which N agrees to, and the spell determines that yes, that's exactly what's going on.

I immediately confront N, mid-session, and tell him outright that this isn't fair, that I told him I didn't want him to change this part of my backstory, and I wanted him to change it back immediately or I wasn't going to play anymore. He started on this long-winded response basically summarizing as "I'm the DM, I can do what I want".

This is the part where I may be the asshole, because well, I saw red in that moment, and decided I not only wanted to follow through on my threat of quitting, but also do something to ensure that my point was driven home.

I fired off a quick message to T on my phone warning him what I was about to do, and while the others were talking about what to do to help me I loudly announced that my character was stabbing herself through the heart, which N had previously ruled would be an instant method of death if carried out.

Silence falls over the group. N tells me that I need to roll to see if I even hit, which I argue (with T backing me up) that if my character is willing to get hurt then it's automatically a hit. N tells me that I need to roll to see if I even pierce my heart. Okay, fine, I roll, and as luck would have it I roll a Nat 20. N attempts to send me just to death saves, but I remind him (again, with T backing me up) that he'd ruled that this was an instant death.

So then he tries to have an NPC cleric show up and revive my character, but T brings up that the soul has to be willing to return to life for that to work, and I immediately say that my character wouldn't even be able to consent to that if her soul was held by a demon, nor would she even be willing if she could. Then I tell N directly that he can consider this my official resignation from the group and walk out, and T follows along behind me after a few minutes.

Ever since then N's been blowing up my phone, fluctuating between begging for me to rejoin the group and promising that he'll do things differently this time, and calling me a selfish bastard for "ruining the fun". T still goes to sessions occasionally, though I think now it's just to spectate, and he's said that maybe things went a little far with the character death in hindsight. And honestly, I'm not exactly proud of how I acted now either.

TL;DR -- I joined a D&D campaign where the DM has made unwanted changes to my character's backstory, despite my attempts to communicate with him, so I retaliated by killing my character mid-session and refusing to let him revive her before quitting. AITA?

#aita #am i the asshole #suicide cw #not sure if it's needed for a dnd character death but just to be safe

[luvring]

hello!! hi. i hope you are not too busy. i have been enjoying your 'falling in love' hcs for the ts characters, and i was wondering if i could ask for the same concept with kuras? if possible? please take your time with it. ^_^ i thinjk he would be silly with it but would also want to biblically smite the reader with his mind (/affectionate) . or you two are psychoanalyzing each other from opposite sides of the room FAR away from each other. I Dont Know. packingf my suitcase and leaving

KURAS FALLING IN LOVE

gn!reader | didn't realize how poor a read i have on his possible plot until writing this. my bad. good job red spring studio U and ur mysteries and kuras's identity in the overarching lore got me this time...

this is going to be the most normal start of a relationship of the LIs. like he's just ('just') a doctor. you're about to strangers -> friends this through coffee and chatting

kuras doesn't...seek you out? not at first. that's not to say he isn't interested by you, but he has a job (and secrets) to handle. but he welcomes your visits as long as he has a break!

it starts with offering to grab or buy something, then staying and helping, learning about a random medicine he has on the counter, and then you're a semi-regular presence at the clinic, and you know which cabinets to check for the average sickness/bandaging. his practiced smile turns into a genuine one when you come through the door. he's asking how your trip was, catching you up on what's been happening lately

one moment i feel might happen is you finding yourself in his clinic, needing his help again,, hopefully your clothes are in tact this time. he jokes about how he'd rather not see you on the cot if you wanted to visit again.

little pranks...!! the senobium or him. roleplaying to throw guards off your trail y'know. getting to see that playful side of him :3

if it's him, he pranks you back, shooting you the same 'innocent' smile he does the guards. be careful about spilling that ink. you've been misplacing papers and pens all day too, haven't you? are you feeling alright?

another moment is. it's hard to say what, but you unknowingly say something tied to his situation. you casually drop your opinion on guilt and atonement—smth smth how guilt will rot and your atonement will never end if you don't let it smth smth the evil that others do with your kindness does not corrupt you smth smth—and it gets him.. Thinking. ! maybe you find those stories about a teacher and harbinger of chaos, and after bringing it up to kuras, he asks you for your opinion on them.

!! one moment i hope we get is kuras 'letting loose' or being silly. laughing really loud and apologizing as it lessens to a chuckle. trying to eat food because you don't know he doesn't eat, and it goes terribly wrong so he gives up and lets you laugh at him

LOL the psychoanalyzing. you say something and he has a weird reaction like Hm. sure, of course. and you're like ??? and he tells you it's nothing, just that that makes sense for you. and you're like Woah you wanna talk about My observations about You? and kuras looks at you like [ !! ] [ ?! ]

there's also small things that suddenly feel more intimate—him cleaning up a wound on your face and holding eye contact, his fingers lingering as they brush your cheek. you instinctively reaching for him when someone bumps into you, and him making sure you're alright.

kuras starts taking more initiative by inviting you to join him places and talking about himself. (cue joke about how information is power and him saying he'll make an exception for you.)

but it won't be all sunshine and rainbows considering he's an incredibly old angel and he has. shit going on.... who knows what shit honestly

you notice how he still doesn't share everything, which is fair enough—you're not spilling your entire life story either. but you still don't know basic things about this guy, you don't even know how he's kept his clothes clean all this time or how Old he is

that distance kuras keeps between you grows again because he doesn't want you to get in harm's way, and it's inevitable if you stick too close. he's an expert at dodging questions, answering just enough to keep people satisfied, but what does this mean for you? someone he's unexpectedly grown fond of, and who keeps calling him out for it?

you voice what you're both thinking. he has a frustrated expression when you point out you both like each other, and you want to help him for once, because ??!! he doesn't know what to do here.

something something, kuras's true form, him invalidating all the good he's done for the chaos and ruin he's brought, the world before, being the one to help him find forgiveness, the divine as neither good nor bad, kuras defining himself outside of a teacher and sinner Something Somethigngggaaghhh

Honestly. i've been messing with both ideas in my head and i haven't picked one i enjoy more so.

there's kuras, who's never been in love and is suddenly fumbling for once, trying really hard to 'do it right' and figuring out what it means to be in a relationship and in love (he's overthinking) (he was doing alright) (he asks ais/mhin for their opinions)

and then there's kuras who goes with what he was doing before, just with more affection/intimacy, because seriously he was already doing a great job at being a good partner :sob:

i think kuras's feelings are a slow burn themself. like, he takes the time to get to know you, to open up, etc, and he wouldn't define what he feels as 'being in love' for a while ?? he knows you're incredible important to him, and know him better than...probably anyone else. but he thinks "i love you" is a very significant thing to think and say out loud and he wants to make sure he knows for sure.

if you wait for him to say it first, i think he'd make it a really special moment! ^^ he thinks for a while about how to do it and, maybe uncharacteristically, gets nervous. his face lights up in its own way when you say it back (not a huge face-splitting grin, but his smile does grow and it's obvious he's relieved/happy)

it isn't often that the doctor is thrown off his game, especially not for longer than a few minutes, so if you ever casually, and Very Quickly*, say "love you" while you're leaving, it's a Sight to See. imagining ais coming to see him and going ...?? when kuras opens the wrong cabinet for the most basic medicine. he applauds your work the next time you see him

*very quickly because if you're in a situation where you're alone and he isn't needed, he's going to stop you?? like what?? can we have a conversation about this (not mad just stunned and values communication and also in love with you and)

#touchstarved x reader #kuras x reader #got writers block specifically for reqs... Again... but i pushed through! i got it. hah #not proofreading this i dont know whats been written If theres a typo. ... dont even tell me. judtodntlekdlcmekdn

[spacerockfloater]

You know what?

I get it, ok? I understand the concept of Rhysand being a morally grey character. I understand that SJM wanted him to be an anti-hero of sorts. I would be totally okay with him doing everything that he did and standing by his actions if he simply said “The only thing that concerns me is myself, my circle and my people. I’m here to protect my interests first and everything else second. I am no hero, I am just someone who puts himself and his sphere first. I am a selfish person and I’m totally okay with that. I do not need anyone’s approval.” I still wouldn’t be his biggest fan, because I do not tend to admire self serving people, but I would totally understand him. In fact, I might have done the same thing. I guess you can never know for sure what your reaction to something would be unless you actually end up in that situation. I get that the average person would protect themselves (themselves = them and their loved ones) but I do believe that admiration should be saved for people who go against the norm. People who actually put their foot down, say no, protest, fight back, risk their lives, experience loss for a greater good. That’s why I admire Khalias, Tarquin, Helion, Tamlin etc. Because they stood up to Amarantha while knowing the consequences of their actions. I wouldn’t admire Rhysand, but I’d support him if he just owned up to his shit and said “Yup, I’m your average person, I don’t care if I come off as the bad guy!”.

But he does not! He wants everyone to applaud him and thank him and feel like they owe him and appreciate him and and and and… Jesus Christ man, you did the bare minimum and you did it all when you had nothing to lose! Thank you so much that you convinced that frigid bitch to murder two dozens of children instead of me and my family, of course I am now forever in your debt! Relax. You were able to talk Amarantha out of directly harming the other High Lords only after you harmed others to gain her favour and you saved the High Lords only because it served you better to keep them alive instead of some irrelevant children fae. I’m sure that your people should be thanking you because you did it all for them after all, but count me the fuck out of it.

Last but not least: ACOTAR Feyre was, obviously, a hero. She was a morally good character. She sacrificed herself for people she didn’t even know. I’m not gonna debate that. I actually loved her in the first book. However, I think she went through a drastic change after her metamorphosis. Her “human heart” is actually no longer human to say the least. I’m not even gonna elaborate on how she became this cruel, unforgiving person that only cared about how people treated her, or how disrespectful she is towards other people like Tarquin because Rhysand made her feel entitled to do so, or how she is responsible for the destruction of two courts that simply seemed like collateral damage if it meant that she would get her revenge on Tamlin. I’m simply going to say that logically speaking, since Feyre stands 100% besides Rhys and everything he did and supports him, she’s also a morally grey person AT BEST, though I do tend to think of both of them as villains because after all, the very definition of a villain is “someone defined by their acts of selfishness, evilness, arrogance, cruelty, and cunning” and like, come on, this screams Feysand.

The term morally grey is so overused. Someone who’s selfish and cunning and cares mostly about themselves is, at least partially, a bad person. A morally grey character is at least half a villain. When did we actually start to equate anti heros with heros?

#acotar critical #acotar #sjm critical #anti rhysand #anti feyre archeron #anti feyre #anti feysand

[grifff17]

Audiodrama Sunday 04/28/24

So much stuff this week! I think this is going to be my longest writeup yet!

@camlannpod what the fuck? Trying to avoid spoilers, but the ending of that episode was wild. The sound design for the last scene was so good. Also “You're good with an axe, right?” was brutal, I audibly said "oof". Only 1 more episode in the season, hopefully they get funding for a second one.

The first episode of @wanderersjournalpod came out this week. This was a promising start to a new show, I'm excited to see where it goes from here. The setting feels very mystical, I can't wait to learn more about the world.

@worldsbeyondpod was so tense. Suvi and Ame had the most awkward conversation in existence. This story has so much nuance, neither of them are clearly in the right, though I feel inclined to take Ame's side due to the "Geas + Alter Memory" double espionage scheme. Meanwhile Ursulon discovers that Orima of the Reaching Green is a short queen and gets a cool horse.

I'm now up to date with @lostterminal. Season 15 was great. I love Nia, and Daphne and Raffi were really interesting new characters. Also, the dragon was terrifying. This show doesn't usually have very much action, so the confrontation with it really stood out. The description of the automatic turret going "click, click" as it locked on to Maddie was so intimidating.

@worldgonewrongpod I loved this episode. The storytelling felt so natural and real, like someone telling me a story about a weird road trip they went on. I think I said this about the last episode too, but this was my favorite episode yet. It also sets up the backstory which was never really explained as to why Jamie and Malik are separated at all.

In @midstpodcast we finally had a nicer episode. No horrible fucked up Weep/Trust stuff happening, just Lark reunited with Zeila and Sherman. However, there's so much tension between these characters. I was surprised that Lark forgave Sherman for selling her out. Something to remember is that Lark and Sherman had been hooking up before everything went to shit, which was mentioned once and I think really changes their relationship.

New @keepitsteadypod! This is the first new episode of this show since I started doing these. This was a really cute episode. For how popular fake dating is as a trope in fandom spaces, you don't see a lot of it in audiodramas.

Fun episode of Mission Rejected this week. It was cool to see Bowden go from "vain actor" to "badass spy" when the stakes ramped up. We don't get to see him take charge very often, it was neat for him to be a competent leader. I wonder if the gang lying to Zelda(who definitely saw through it) and Chet(who probably didn't) is foreshadowing for more of a conflict with the new Secretary of Defense later in the season. Also I loved the squabbling gay couple running an illegal mining operation as the villains of the week.

@breakerwhiskey episode 200 wow. A letter from Harry! We learned that Harry has been listening to most of Whiskey's broadcasts, which recontextualizes a lot of the previous episodes. Also, the end was heartbreaking.

I started season 2 of @longcatmedia's Mockery Manor! I'm 2 episodes in and really like it so far. JJ and Bettie are employed in different parks, JJ is on the run from an organized crime ring, and Bettie became a monk? Also, it's clear that neither Hilda nor Jenkins stole the shipment, neither of them have motive. But I don't know who else would have motive either. Lots of mysteries this season.

Spout Lore had a great planning episode. I'm excited for the "saving Highspear" arc, the Highspear is so cool as a concept. A reverse Tower of Babel, that lets the whole world talk with each other. A literal monument to wizard hubris, which feels destined to fall. However I doubt it will, because, as the players mentioned, it would be really annoying from a storytelling perspective if everyone suddenly spoke different languages. This has actually made me realize I really want a story set shortly after some sort of "fall of the Tower of Babel", where communication is a struggle, but that's just because I think linguistics is cool. Anyways, the buffet talk had me rolling.

What a great week! However, it did not help my queue, which continues to grow instead of get smaller. I'll reach the end of it one day.

#camlann #camlannpod #wanderer's journal #worlds beyond number #twtwtwo #lost terminal #world gone wrong #midst podcast #keep it steady #mission rejected #breaker whiskey #mockery manor #spout lore #spout lore podcast

[herotome]

Devlog # 138

Hi-ho, Wudge here.

I'll be real, lately I've been struggling hardcore when it comes to design. Mia's hero outfit is giving me an honest to goodness run for my money; I try and try and yet each edition of her outfit doesn't feel quire right. It's not just the feeling that they're 'not good enough,' they also don't quite feel like her. And each time I try to take a new stab at it makes me feel all the more crazy for the effort -- something something expecting different results.

I keep trying to convince myself that it was much easier back when I started Herotome -- particularly Warden's hero costume, his big blue gimp suit just sprang into existence like shablamn!

But... I have to remind myself that it did take a while to put together Jade's and Dart's hero outfits. Hell, I wasn't entirely satisfied with Jade's even when I called it done. And another thing - as my mom pointed out when I complained to her about this lol - having created previous designs does make it more challenging to create new-and-different designs.

...With all this being said, here's where she's at:

These designs build off my established concepts of - she has to armor up due to how the nature of her powers will get her into scrapes, but she also wants to look cute. This led me to... essentially putting her in a maid cafe outfit and medieval plate mail. Mia is not a fantasy/JRPG girlie at all though, so ultimately this design isn't going to work.

And here, blurred out bc I'm still working on it, is my next take. I looked at how characters like Wonder Woman and Iron Man wore armor that had a very modern look, and I also... uh, looked at some crabs. Like, crustaceans. The ones in the ocean. They are truly beautiful creatures and I tried to take some color schemes from them. This led to a very, very red design with... what looks like a glowing petticoat? ;;; I worry that this would elicit a look of fire, and while Mia has a fiery personality she doesn't exactly have fire superpowers... so I'll keep at it. I at least like it more than the medieval jrpg maid though.

Other than that...

I started working on expressions for Griffin's sprite!!!

This one has a weird uncanny resemblance to the chick from hotel transylvania.

... Honestly uh, I've also been struggling with Griffin's sprite art here. I've done a lot more work for her (that I have not shared in this post) that just doesn't feel quite right. But I'll keep doing my best.

I think that's it for now.

Stay safe and keep warm,

Wudge.

#interactive fiction #herotome update #oelvn #visual novel #otome game #otome #english otome #indie game #indie dev #indie otome

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

My memory is terrible so I wanted to do a breakdown of my stuff every once in a while. Might be monthly, might be whenever I feel like it.

QL - Currently Watching

��🇭1000 Years Old [11/12] - I know some of you are enjoying this one and I'm glad. And I have no idea what the finale has in store for us but this is just not the show for me. One episode to go and I honestly can't remember the last time I was this unenthusiastic about a finale. It's not even that it's that bad, it's just incredibly boring to me. I'll update this tomorrow with my thoughts on the finale.

🇹🇭23.5 [8/12] - The main couple lost me but I love Aylin and Luna. View is a delight to watch and whenever they're on screen together I'm in heaven. Also... THE TEACHERS!!! THEY ARE GIVING THEM TO US! We are blessed.

🇯🇵25 Ji, Akasaka de [2/10] - I like it a lot. I'm doing my best to not compare it to 'I Became the Lead in a BL Drama' for obvious reasons, but the tone seems different enough. I like the aesthetic a lot and I really like their dynamic, at the beginning it reminded me of Kabe Koji a bit. I'm mildly obsessed with Shirasaki's eyes and facial expressions. And a 'secret' crush is usually a win with me.

🇰🇷Boys Be Brave [2/8] - So far so good. Gi Seop is obvisouly not the best boy but there's something about his energy on screen that is compelling to me. I really liked that Jin Woo was honest about his feelings and I like the 'I love you but I don't like you' dynamic a lot. The second couple gave me some ODS vibes so I'm bracing for some angst.

🇯🇵Living with him [3/8] - It's great. Much like what I said above, I love that things are out in the open so soon and honestly Natsukawa reaction to the confession being basically 'how can I help?' was amazing to me. Also for anyone interested, this one is being fansubbed which is good cause according to my dear @colourme-feral the subs are not good at all.

🇰🇷Love Is Like a Cat [2/12] - I'm waiting to binge this one. Didn't like how this started and the rhythm just isn't working for me.

🇹🇭My Stand-In [1/12] - Pretty is pretty. But I don't trust Thailand with high concept so I have reservations. I hope I'm wrong. I liked the first episode so we'll see.

🇹🇭Only Boo! [4/12] - Moo is my child and he must be protected at all costs. I'm fighting myself with the singing and dancing because I should not be enjoying it at all and yet he's so charming. I hope Book's character is not here to do what I think it is because that would seriously damper my enjoyment of this otherwise bright spot in my week.

🇹🇭We Are [2/12] - I like the group scenes. They all seem very comfortable with each other. The main couple is the least compelling to me, just nothing new or interesting to see there. Aou is great at the comedy and I'm enjoying Poon a lot. Overall this show just doesn't flow, it keeps jumping from scene to scene/couple to couple without much of a threat and so I'm not really connecting. @bengiyo said it best here when he said it's like watching the actors ig reels.

🇹🇼Unknown [11/12] - I still think it's an incredible show, the best one airing right now probably, but I have to admit that the sex scene was a blemish in my overall enjoyment of it. I saw both versions, and although the reedited one is better is still not good. I don't think it was the right tone for the moment nor for the characters. Also it just doesn't flow well and the sound drove me crazy.

QL - Finished

🇹🇭Deep Night - This one surprised me a bit. There was a refreshing amount of good communication and they gave the people what they wanted, poly and older lesbians. I wish there were more acrobatics and the editing was weird in places but overall it's an entertaining show.

🇰🇷Gray Shelter - This is weird one. Because I feel like I have to fill in the gaps myself and that just shouldn't be the case. I enjoyed the actors a lot, and Lee Jae Bin presence on screen kept me engaged for most of it. There is definitely potential here if they had the time to explore all the different elements. But this runtime it's just not enough to fully flesh out these characters and the complex issues it wants to tackle.

🇯🇵Love is Better The Second Time Around - Started great but lost itself by the end. I don't think it needed that external conflict by the end with the brother and the mother because they weren't on firm ground to begin with. If I were to make a list like this one by @lurkingshan I don't think Myiata and Iwanaga would make it there. Iwanaga was amazing to watch though. He pretty.

🇯🇵My Strawberry Film - One pining gay boy does not a bl make. With that said, even as a drama there's nothing interesting here.

🇹🇭To Be Continued - Meh. It was fine. I wish I had more of the side couple because Gumbie is adorable. Midway this was getting into The Promise territory, and while it's not that bad, and I guess the reason for the separation is a valid one, I don't think Achi being the 'bad guy' for most of the show actually makes sense.

Rose Watches OJBL

Junjou (2010) - Second chance romance. I liked it. It's a nice watch, nothing particularly outstanding or new about this one, although that's not really fair considering it's more than a decade old, but alas I've seen other versions of this particular type of bl. Nevertheless I liked the characters, specially Tozaki,

Athlete (2019) - The visuals were the best part for me. There are several things I like in this, the main actor does a really good job imo and I truly enjoyed the bar scenes. But it doesn't all come together for me. I don't have a problem with the ending as much as how we got there.

Other - Watched

This was a slow month for me. I started a new job and some other stuff happened so I haven't really been in the mood to watch new stuff. Mostly comfort watches and rewatches. Oh I did watch Heartbreak High S2. It was good.

That's it for right now. My ask box is always open. Wishing you all a wonderful holiday tomorrow💜

#rosy watchlist #1000 years old #23.5 degrees #at 25:00 in akasaka #living with him #Unknown the series #boys be brave #my stand in the series #only boo the series #we are the series #athlete 2019 #junjou pure heart #to be continued #gray shelter #my strawberry film #deep night #love is better the second time around #multi bl #Rose Watches OJBL #rose rambles

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 4/30/2024

most annoying book i've read so far this year under the jump

listening

a lovely polyrhythmic instrumental piece with previously-featured tuesdaysong artist, terrifying master of the cello, abel selaocoe. this is very textured and kind of scrubs at the inside of my skull in a pleasing way. like the kind of back scrubber you can buy with a bamboo handle and the long soft bristles. popped up on my recent releases playlist from spotify.

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reading

really fucking pissed about this book and i am not able to be reasonable about it. i was really thrown, much like the fantasy prince's mother from her carriage as she was being chased by regency gossip reporters, that this was a prince harry/meghan markle RPF AU. i am a bit uncomfy about the fact that our female lead, the fantasy AU meghan markle, is some flavor of fantasy Gaelic instead of fantasy mixed-race. now, i have no particular moral or physical beef with RPF but i don't typically seek it out. but/also/and, much like works about marilyn monroe, i think works with the specter of princess diana are in poor taste. can we leave these women alone maybe

i got about halfway through the book before this revelation and didn't really feel like it succeeded at much of anything it was trying to do. oddly informal and choppy, like it was originally intended as a contemporary romance with some urban magic and changed to regency in a late draft. this is combined with some fairly weak prose: more simple sentence structure than i would expect in a book for young adults, far too many proper nouns, and a lack of interest in showing not telling.

i straight up don't understand why the leads are attracted to each other if she keeps making very public mistakes and he's a rude cunt. i have read other books (most recently the t kingfisher books) where someone grows to love a very gruff or taciturn man, but it takes time and mutual trust and an effort on both sides, none of which happen here. the core conflict is duty to family in all its various forms vs the heart wants what the heart wants. the conflict is not much of a conflict, though, because characters come to realizations within three sentences of confronting them and then vocalize them with therapyspeak. someone literally pats someone else's hand and goes, "It's hard, I know." the author mercifully did not describe the sad little pursed sympathy mouth but i'm sure it was there.

i'm also deeply annoyed with how this author chose to go about characterization. while the character concepts are people i would love to meet in a ttrpg, it feels very concerned about Good Representation and it makes everyone feel very wooden. i think when you put together characters from a list of various oppressions and disabilities it starts feeling like a grownup version of a children’s ensemble show meant to sell little blind box figurines. here is the Chronically Ill one, and her color is pink! here is the Addicted one, and his color is green! here is the Goth and Depressed one, and her color is black with some bones! here is the Gay one who was once badly hurt by the Addicted one, and we don’t care enough about him to give him a color! here is the superficially fantasy-Jewish one, and we don’t care enough about her to give her a color or an action figure either!

while normally i would love to read a book with two! TWO! canonically bisexual leads of different genders! this book is written for the "folx" spectrum of gays instead of the "fags" part of the spectrum and it strays very close to a modern morality tale for me.

this popped up on a list of books with bi leads i think, but if it was here or on libby i cannot remember.

anyway! fucking hated this one.

pleasantly surprised these came in back to back off my holds lists, bc they are about the perfumer Grace and Grace's former landlord, the spy Marguerite. my favorite of these Saint of Steel series is still the one with the werebear nun. i have nothing to complain about these books and not much to say about them either. they were such a delightful and competent change of pace after the annoyance of the previously discussed book.

oh i loved these. oh i LOOOOOOVED these. how the fuck does novik do it. she is so good at capturing the very specific feel of a grandpa military historical novel. except with dragons. i love these in the same way i know i will love the patrick o'brien books if i ever get around to reading them. i was a navy brat and unfortunately this is fucking catnip to me. truly i have inherited all my father's tastes

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watching

largely fallow week. i don't have anything particularly great to say about The Bad Batch, but when have i ever. have not caught up with dunmeishi bc my siblings have once again inadvertently locked me out of the netflix account i pay for. considering a vpn for many reasons but watching netflix and watching porn (the state of texas does not want me or anyone else to watch porn within her borders) are the two big reasons for. idk. cashing out the paltry cash-back credit card rewards and coughing them up for a vpn. vpn opinions welcomed, i know most of them are straight garbage

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playing

i straight up ran out of money in genshin, which is pretty hard to do since they're pretty generous with it? i have spent several million in-game currency on leveling up neuvilette (i am so so so happy to not have to collect any fucking starfish mats for him anymore [mats are different materials you have to collect or buy in-game in order to level up a character. very grindy most of the time]). anyway i am now scrabbling around for the last couple chests and puzzles i marked on my map in fontaine. i haven't bothered with grinding for his specific boosting artifacts or leveling up his talents all the way yet but this is really not shabby. i have the bad habit of completely levelling up all my 5-stars and then ignoring them until i need them for a specific fight or a specific level of the monthly..battle royale puzzle? i don't really know how to describe the abyss. anyway when i do eventually need his pretty intense water AOE attacks i will frantically grind for his talent mats. right now we're grinding for other things thanks

this latest update contains both the best and worst new areas so far. the underwater lost city of Remuria is a fuckin banger. gorgeous. incredible puzzles. very fun music-based quest line with new abilities and giant whale. however, im kind of disappointed by the new coastline area in the map: there is pretty much nothing there. almost no interactable plants to harvest, very few enemies, almost no chests. i get that they are focusing their time and attention on the new underwater area everyone will be focusing on (killer, btw, super dense and great use of vertical space). very lore-heavy expansion, sort of what if atlantis was a bit roman-inspired and also. hold on. wait a second.

sorry this has just occurred to me at 10:21 PM on Monday night as im drafting this but oh my god are the fucking fontanians the Sea Peoples of the bronze age collapse. this is hysterically funny lore if true. im going to have to go back and reread a lot of the environmental storytelling notes but oh my GOD that's extremely funny if true. genshin has some of the most batshit lore of any game ive ever played and im so sad that so few game journos are focusing on it.

where was i. leveling up characters in legally-not-france who may or may not be descendants of the sea peoples. i often find myself leveling up characters in genshin not based on how useful they are to the party but by how fun the bosses i need to fight for their mats are? for example: neuvilette is a water-based AOE character with not a lot of on-field time. however this big electric seahorse, whose antlers i need to level him up, is really fun to fight and i can knock it out in about thirty seconds.

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making

my sister's birthday is tomorrow! my birthday package to her was kind of heavy on stupid little trinkets and art books and not very much like. homemade? so i cranked out a little sampler. it's framed i promise i simply forgot to take a picture of it framed. about 3"x3", slightly adapted from a piece in Julie Jackson's Subversive Cross Stitch. i do think the F and C turned out way better (or at least the backstitching stands out way more) but hey. sometimes you need to hastily stitch a gift with the limited colors you have on hand

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

[w0nderland]

greys anatomy is so close to being a good show it's a little frustrating lol

#like they start out with these good character concepts #but it seems like they can only focus on 3-4 plots at a time #so sometimes a character will just be forgotten?? like george was completely dropped for the second half of season 5 #and his character arc was botched so bad too #he started off as the underdog & proves himself and works so hard #then becomes this guy who falls in love with every single woman who befriends him & cheats on his wife #then goes back to being the shy guy who doesn't realize lexie is into him #then lexie gets over george in like 2 seconds flat #girlies what is going onnnnnnn #also meredith and derek falling in love shouldve been given more screen time they just have such good chemistry i wanted more sweet moments #but i understand why that is not necessary #anywayyyyy i just finished season 5 talk to me about greys anatomy!!!!!!!! #now that riverdale is over i am floundering looking for more media

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Thank you all for voting in the poll to decide who was going to be the leader of the band! It turned out to be such a close race!

#poorly drawn mdzs #better drawn mdzs #mdzs #madam lan #A-qing #Band AU #(Reminder that Madam Lan's design inspiration goes to Qourmet!) #Madam Lan may have been the winner per vote count but there were so many strong advocates for A-Qing! #I played around with a few versions of what the 'poll winner' art was going to be and ultimately decided I wanted them both. #As any good theater love knows though - The battle for leadership was a ruse. They *all* get a chance to be featured. #Cooperation was the real end goal! However I do think these two have the best frontman energy of the group. #Or at least 'crowd favourite' energy. I also really loved hearing what people thought their vocal styles would be like! #This was probably one of my favourite polls to do and I love drawing these characters a lot B*) #I'd love to spend a bit more time in this AU so count on me bringing it back. #One thing I keep feeling like I need to redeem myself on is Madam Lan's Translucent skirt. I have *not* done the concept justice yet. #It is such a crack-platonic ship but I want to think Madam Lan and A-Qing would enjoy each other's company. #Possibly also with JYL as well. They can be like mutually beneficial therapy dogs to each other. #Madam Lan never got to see her kids grow up into teenagers after all. She only had sons. Never daughters. #Even if she saw her kids once a month we do know she treated them with so much love and kindness. #She would bite the shit out of YZY for yelling at JYL. What a sight to see. A-Qing would also start biting (for fun).

[theliterarywolf]

Not that there should ever be anything Twitter does better than any other platform, but at least the 'Mute this person for everything except for the art you actually followed them for' function was S-tier when it worked because some people on here really like to talk shit about self-made problems and act like their art is enough for people to suffer through shitty takes.

#no people participating in fandom isn't bad as a whole; what IS bad is people treating fictional shite like it's real life #for every 'this show set in Hell is bad because it's not how I would do it' post I see where the OP doesn't even TRY #to talk about other IPs set in Hell #I'm about to start handing out badges that say 'I'm pretty much the same thing as a Disney shill except my immovable hurdle #is actually watching other media based on my favored concept except for what's popular' #No one hates you because you redesigned a popular character #they hate you because you're being up your own ass about it #take this unfollow and stop being annoying as fuck; I follow way too many good CHILL artists #for YOU to be the one to stink up the room

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Walking In Two Worlds & The Everlasting Road

YA sff set in the near future where an opensource augmented reality is commonly used like social media, and there’s also a completely virtual fantasy game version

follows an Anishinaabe girl who who’s the top player in the VR game, and is constantly fighting to keep her place against the misogynist neo-nazi group in second place

as well as her real life, dealing with being a shy and self-conscious teen growing up on the Rez, and her brother having cancer

and a Uyghur boy who’s moved to her community from China after finding acceptance in an online community (even when he doesn’t agree with their more extreme views) - but when he gets to know Bugz, he has to decide who truly deserves his loyalty

great mix of sff and culture, the future while also very real community traumas of the past (and present)

#walking in two worlds #the everlasting road #wab kinew #aroaessidhe 2024 reads #This has some REALLY interesting and important concepts! #I just think it could have used some more development… Obvs this is YA and I’m an adult I know I’m not quite the audience! #There’s a lot of depth in the setup of the characters but I feel like it skips a lot of the progression #I think there could have been space for more development in a lot of places to make the story feel more dimensional #- but also has so many plot threads that maybe that would have bulked it out too much #It does also jump around quite a bit between the different parts but I think that makes sense with how juggling with irl / online life. #she’s got a lot of internalised fatphobia at the start (and the love interest going “I don’t think you’re fat!!” when people call her fat.. #then in book 2 suddenly she’s okay about it - again I wish there was some progression! #her brothers cancer journey is. basically all offscreen lol mostly as set up for plot in book 2. so it doesn't have the emotional impact it #could have.. #I liked the way it integrates her culture into the game in a really cool way (though I would have liked more detail there) #also having auto language translators but they regularly don't translate quite right / still run into issues - realistic! #the parallels drawn between his being taken from his family and put in a state education school and Indigenous residential schools #the way that a future world will never be as separate from the past as ur average sff future often portrays #but yeah anyway lots of good ideas execution not so much for me..

[vyibunni]

the fontaine characters im looking forward to the most

#genshin impact #furina #focalors #arlecchino #wriothesley #neuvillette #yeah weve already met two of them but i started these before 4.0 lol #i modified the clothes like craaaaazy my brain refuses to interpret what im looking at when i refrence clothes #but i had a ton of fun making these #my concept was i want the composition and poses to be like portraits that had been commisioned of them #but furinas would be just her looking straight at the viewer lol #anyway yes now when fontaine is already out they are still my most anticipated characters 💖💖💖💖 #oh also in my perfect world furina and arlecchino dont have their pigtails/ponytail bc i think they look. bad. #so i live my life like they dont. so i purposefully omitted them LMAO #EDIT im sorry yall english is not my first language ive been messing with the caption so much but i cant get anything #to sound good AND grammatically correct

[wabblebees]

just finished the new fantasy high episode and havent seen anyone talk abt this so i wanted to say i am 100. one HUNDRED PERCENT sure. that fuckin fourdogs was at that party invisibly (the One And Only buttfucker to NOT make an obvious appearance?? rules-follower or no, i dont believe that for a SECOND) and that she stole the piece of the cloud runner that went missing, and that the moment of her swipe was the "something" riz missed on his check -- i also really *hope* it wasn't oisin that made those damn ice mephits (or "muffets" as my beloved drunk adaine christened them lmao) act up like that, but immmmm pretty sure thats exactly what was goin on since it wouldve given his party member advantage/an easier access point :/

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #fhjy spoilers #listen i was oisin to be good & real & nice SO BAD. HOT RIPPED TATTED DRAGONBORN WIZARD ??? PLEASE #but. im also a suspicious-ass bitch lmao #also wait ik they spelled his name without the accent on his character art #but doesnt the name oisin have an accent over one of the i's?? idk jack abt shit so i could be wrong ofc #in any case. i like the concepts behhind the ratfuckers as a party (*except buddy. seeing him made me feel fucking ILL lmao.) but #i neeeeeeed them to get fucking TROUNCED by the bad kids. i NEED it. theyd be so much more tolerable if they got briefly asswhooped #like i think after that they could TOTALLY be friends and work together. before that?? FUCK no lmfao #anyway. i love-hate fishykitty whatserbucket and i need to see her lose #i cant wait for the ratgrinders to meet the unstoppable force that is the bad kids bigass hearts #deciding to team up with local shitheads & therefore turning them into op allies by sheer force of will and love #its happened to ragh its happened to aelwyn it kiiinda happened with kalina (jury's still out but my fingers are crossed!!) #spring break i believe in them!!! #bee speaks #its happening yall. i try to keep my incomprehensible blorboposting to a dull roar but now that im fully caught up on d20 i fear i may start #going full pepe silvia trying to figure this out #i cant binge it all in one go and have it rot thru my brain like slow-eating acid to leak thru in a contained matter #waiting for a new episode every week means i have time to THINK

[worstloki]

saw someone on twitter say "one of the main characters in a loki show should have been thor odinson, not some random Sylvie or Mobius.

...... It's like a written law"

wdyt do you agree

I don't think it was necessary to make Thor a main character in a Loki show, the same way it WOULD be possible to throw together a Thor movie without having Loki be a main focus.

The issue comes in the quality of the narrative itself, and writing that if evidently without intention to care for (whichever) main character's importance will not work out. Neither the Loki series nor Thor 4 cared about the arc, motivations, history, or continuity of the titular characters beyond trying to make the media marketable.

Overall messaging can add a layer to the impact a story will have. Musical score can be a bonus way to control tone or tie a story together. Supporting cast can be vital to tell a good story. Prioritising their presence over anyone's (especially Loki's) characterisation is what the Loki series suffered from, not that other, original-adjacent characters were there.

#i'd say it was tell not show but frankly the plotline was so poorly done i don't think showing would have helped #it would have solidified the side characters better though #if they had put effort into characterising Loki right then poorly done side characters could've been a non-issue #messing up the main characters which are supposed to be part of a continuity is the number 1 issue #not managing the screen-time well was the number 2 issue #too much time wasted setting up characters that were going to monologue about their importance anyway?? #too much time spent trying to establish the TVA as something important and controlling but somehow good #so much could have been cut out of the show and still gotten all that across #the relationships people built did so in like 2 days in-universe iirc so i wouldn't call them solid #season 1 was a useless introductory setup for the multiverse that didn't have any impact because there were like 4 other setups #scrap the characterisation and call it a reboot and it still threw Loki out as a weak and completely conventional protagonist #that's not engaging when every other character is also boring overall #even if their concepts weren't boring the way it was done was #The Loki Show #i can't be bothered thinking about the show because there's just so much #where would one start #i don't care enough about it to hate the show but i did find the fight choreography lacking too #the camera angles and general videography wasn't good #i have the same complaints about the choreography with every other disney+ show they put out #not even bothered with the MCU frankly #i'm happy to pretend the movies stopped after phase 2

[sysig]

A hero is only as good as his weapons, so make ‘em count (Patreon)

#Doodles #Original #Another idea smol and I are working on together :D Been a bit! #She came up with the concept on this one and I fell in love with it <3 She's very cool hehe #If you're familiar with the game Minit it has Something of a similar premise - not the same strict time pressure but yes on the time loop #Y'ever notice how in some games it seems like the wandering trader or traveling shop seems to come upon you rather than the other way around #:3c Hm ♪ Wonder how they'd know where you were gonna be :3c #The crux is that you play as the weapons shop owner and you're responsible for supplying the hero and his team with weapons! #Except the BBEG has gotten wise to how the hero keeps defeating him and it sick of it - so the shop owner is cursed to be in a time loop! #I love the concept <3 It sounds so fun to play in and there's still plenty of room to think about the mechanics and how it would be played #As well as the art design! :D #We threw around some character concepts - she's really into Baldur's Gate 3 at the moment so of course they had some influence in hers hehe #Only got the starting party for the moment but there are plans for a full team of 4 plus the shopkeep >:3c And various other NPCs lol #A lot of the gameplay would basically boil down to being a bartering simulator hehe ♪ #Very RPG trade-this-for-that style quests - under a time limit! Hehe #Since it's the type of game that pretty much requires replaying sections time-loop-style it's all about how quickly you can trial and error #And then hightail it to where you need to be lol #I think we were also tossing around a nap mechanic to skip right to the time loop reset in case you mess up a run haha #I gotta get back to Majora's Mask at some point I swear #We still have a good bit of concept work to do on the art side of things - she's also been really into pixel art lately and I love pixel art #I also managed to pick up a full release of one of the RPGMakers :D So that's an exciting possibility! #I haven't learned most of its ins and outs yet but I do know About importing custom assets at the very least >:3c #Same with Novelty and I haven't done that yet either lol - all in due time! I hope!!

[lunarharp]

wip thing...

of my bg3 avatar hellebore. i also did some casual nude studies of my 3 characters which i'll put under a cut... rather unlike me after all. (so WARNING for abrupt non-sexual full Artistic nudity lol...,,,,) (< won't be making a habit of this)

they mean the world to me

#bg3 spoilers #?? idk. gith look so..Emaciated. And long. i guess we don't eat on the astral plane :) anyway..well..too much to say..... #it is very very very depressing having to live in the Real World after that final playthrough meant so very much to me. #i normally feel Hope & suchlike after finishing a highly immersive emotional game..but it's too hard this time and it hurtsssss lol yippee #i appreciate bg3 very much for being a place where i could access the concept of nudity & such like in a way that finally felt comfortable. #bodies are inherently non-sexual. they just Are a Fact of Life. this game being NORMAL about nudity from the character creation screen #makes it possible for someone like me to actually have a chance at accessing sensuality in a way that feels comfortable from there. #dont feel like putting it into words further. im ace. just very grateful to this game. even despite the horrors i will never ever forget it #augoh..gugf.. want to go back. my friends & love are in there.....i'm supposed to just move on? in the real world??? THIS place???? UHH???? #my characters canonically look like that too!! i see them as intersex and not so much trans. They just look that way. #Diversity win!!! the people who enacted horrors upon you and are trying to kill you again respect your pronouns!!!! <3 #I FAILED HONOUR MODE IN THE STUPIDEST WAY POSSIBLE..ACCIDENTALLY TOUCHED AN ITEM. MY LOVER TOUCHED SOME BLOOD-TOUCHED RAG ITEM @ THE CRECHE #AND MY PEOPLE MASSACRED US... YOU BELOVED PRAT. OF COURSE IT WOULD BE YOU AND IN THIS WAY #grateful for love triangle chaos...INTENSE EX DRAMA... IT HAD MAJOR REPURCUSSIONS THIS TIME...ohh so very much happened ohh my dear #truly don't know how to face the Real World now for real. I Don't Know. something has snapped. ive realised twt just makes me feel sad lol #if something in my spare time isn't at least half as fun as bg3....like.. it's not good enough. god we only have one wild and precious life #being Online makes me feel a loneliness so wretched and painful and horrible i really don't think this is the answer. #Why did you even start drawing in the first place? Why did you start this? #For real..the need to work this out and decide what on earth i'm going to do now has presented itself. Why try to get better..why be online #someone who has an imagination that can keep them so happy and fulfilled...has no business also feeling a loneliness as profound as this. #why was someone THIS introverted and withdrawn and anxious also cursed with such a restlessness? #What are you going to DO now? because hellebore and their lover are fine....... So what about you...? #hellebore..😭😭 AUUGHH!! I JUST WANT TO GO TO MY BED IN THE INN...PLAY ON MY VIOLIN THAT'S WHAT I'D DO!!!! i'd drink some ALE DAMNIT!!!!! #i was rereading My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness- the only time i've seen this level of emotional isolation depicted-and was grateful. #but then i read her latest book and now she has a debilitating substance abuse situation and it's upsetting. #I hope she finds what she was looking for. I hope we all make it. kind of wild that i dont do such major self-sabotage at this point myself #I truly think anyone who manages to find dear friends and achieve fulfillment and happiness with others outside themselves are amazing. #I see it happen from my tower. i hope we all make it. I hope we can make it through everything to come. #Why did i say all this on drawings of my characters naked. ah who even cares any more......