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#like. I don't think medical professionals are supposed to lie about you actually that's kind of a big problem
neverendingford · 2 months
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#tag talk#just realized the intense depression and associated anger issues and intrusive violent thoughts are prolly related to the Lamictal I starte#I was like “I don't think I need this don't think it'll help but I'll try it for science” because I'll try anything once#and uhhh. I went to go to bed and realized there was a bowl with food tucked into my bed covers.#laundry all over is one thing. that's kind of normal. but food in my bed is massive warning bells so I was like uh oh that's real depressio#so anyway i messaged my dr like hey I think these meds are making me feel so fucking lethargic and despondent and also I want to kill peopl#because I would just stop taking them but I'm willing to see what she thinks.#also my current psychiatrist is really great and I like her a lot idk if I already talked about her but she's really cool.#the first one I got was an absolute dick and was passive aggressive towards me and also straight up lied in her notes about me?#said that I had said I'm not sexually active and like. bitch where did I ever say that ever that's literally untrue and you wrote it down.#like. I don't think medical professionals are supposed to lie about you actually that's kind of a big problem#also she was like “I'm not seeing adhd here at all” and wanted to do a full on adhd diagnosis before trying any meds for it#whereas my new person was just like “oh you don't have to talk about being adhd it's pretty obvious to me” and I was like kissing you kissi#ng you kissing you kissing you kissing y#but yeah. I don't think I want to keep taking these meds and I think I'm just gonna take the meds I have to today not the short term ones#some days I just don't need my adhd meds or I would rather feel my normal relatively unproductive self.#still gonna take the ssri and estrogen obvs cause those need to keep up levels in my body and also duh I wanna keep my E levels up#but the others nah my body is super sensitive to meds (or any substances tbh) so I need a break from them today I feel really unbalanced#I did have my gf deadass ask me “should I be worried?” when I mentioned the violent intrusive thoughts and I was like no no no no it's fine#because like. I've never genuinely hurt someone fully impulsively like that. it's all thoughts it's all in the head#I'm not gonna kidnap and murder and dissect anyone it's just theoretical situations my brain likes to fuck me up with.#but it does kinda suck to have people around you inherently mistrust you because of how your brain works.#my brother told me a while back that he locks his door at night because he's worried about me and you do know how fucking hurtful that is?#the person you trust enough to move out and move in with is afraid of you enough to lock their door at night.#not like that would stop me if I genuinely did try to hurt him obviously. interior door locks are a joke.#but like... that someone would hear you talk about intrusive thoughts and genuinely think you capable of them to some extent.#idk that hurts a lot.#I wish I weren't like this.
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monsoonblooms12 · 3 years
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Detectives By Chance: Chapter 4- Seeking and Chasing
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A/N: Hi, how is everyone doing💫💛? I finally completed the 4th chapter, phew. I am really sorry for the delay, It has been some time ( a month to be precise). But I hope that you enjoy reading this💛. Thank you for all the love that you have given the earlier chapters and I love you all very much 💛
Thank you so very much @ohramsey​ for everything. I love you x infinite and I will miss you so much😭🤍❤
Series Summary: It was supposed to be a usual weekend for the four. Coffee, fun, friends and love. But an unexpected case changed their lives in a way they had never imagined. A mystery - a murder - many secrets… Will Ethan, Pooja, Alexandra and Mark, be able to survive? Or will the circumstances twist and break their lives forever?
Pairing: Ethan × f!MC (Dr. Pooja Sharma)
Disclaimer: PB owns most of the characters. I only own the OCs and my MC.
Word count: 2.3K 
Triggers: Mentions of blood, murder
For Ethan and Pooja, a mutual day off was once in a blue moon thing. So whenever they had one, they would put the world out of their mind and remain engrossed in each other.
And now, after getting a cherished day off for the first time in at least one and a half months, they were sitting here scrutinizing the clues they had assembled from the crime scene.
They sat down on the couch, opened their laptops and kept auxiliary notebooks with them to note any admissible details they could find. Ethan took the three pieces of paper and stationed them down on the coffee table.
The first one was the third bloody note that Pooja had received.
It said: "Ahh, here you are. I knew, I knew you would come. You bastards are as obstinate as I am. But don't worry, I like it. So, did you like my pretty little portrayal that I had made for you? All this is just a sprinkle of my intuitive plan. The real game hasn't even begun yet. Just wait and be on your guard for my twisties and turnsies."
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"Hasn't this person done enough? What the freaking hell does he want?" Pooja said, on the brink of tears. She was literally done with this pathetic game of blood.
Ethan hugged her tightly. "Calm down, Love. It hurts me to see you like this. We will find out everything. We will find this person, and we will make them compensate for their sins. I promise." 
"Ethan, I love you so much. Please be with me ad infinitum." Pooja planted a featherlight kiss on Ethan's cheek. 
"I will, Baby, I will, I love you too," Ethan assured her, while tenderly wiping off her tears. 
"And... you don't have to use fancy terms to tell me to love you forever."
At this, Pooja let out a tee-hee.
After she had calmed down, they looked at the second piece of paper. It was a drug store receipt.
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"Propofol?"
"If this is a receipt left-back by the murderer, then why Propofol, did they feel remorseful for Davis? " Pooja scoffed. 
"Remorseful? I sure as hell that's not the case." 
Pooja's question lingered in Ethan's mind. Why would, he thought, the murder make the patient unconscious? So that he doesn't shout?
Maybe. Maybe not.
Poke Poke. Pooja poked at his side, bringing him back to reality.
 "A penny for your thoughts?"
" Just thinking about propofol."
" And what does the mind of the world-class diagnostician say about that?"
" As for now, it says nothing essential."
"But?"
"there is a what if."
"And that is?"
" What if the criminal is right in our plain sight?"
" So, as I understand, you are suggesting that the murder is someone-"
"From the hospital. It would be the easiest for a staff member to do everything, isn't it?"
" Hmmm. Although it is a stab in the dark, it is a pretty commendable reasoning. Good job Mr Mitter."
"Mr what?"
"You don't know Mr. Mitter??!! You need to catch up on your detective knowledge, Ramsey. We need to go on a mystery novel-reading spree, ASAP!"
"Don't you think that's just irrelevant to what we are discussing?"
"Excuse You! How the hell are mysteries irrelevant in a discussion of mysteries?" 
Pooja made a phoney, angry face that made Ethan laugh.
" Okay, so number one you are looking ridiculous with that face and number two maybe, I agree with you, just a little."
"WAIT"
"Did you just... give in and agree with me? The Ethan freaking Ramsey accepted his defeat?"
"How is this def-"
"I will write about this day in golden letters in my autobiography."
"Autobiography?" Ethan was chuckling like an idiot.
"Hey, what do you think? I can't write an autobiography or what?"
"No, no, of course, you can! But I really wanna know if you are going to write about your escapades with Jenner or the sleep-talks you do all night. Or maybe about the variety of chocolate you like."
"ETHAN!"
"Okay Okay, I will stop. Let's look at the third bit of paper." 
The third paper was a visiting card. Or something that looked like visiting card held together with a lot of tape. The name on it was too faded for them to interpret. However, they could make out the address and the designation which, surprisingly, was Dr.
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All the lingers of laughter and joy from the previous exchange dispersed and seriousness took its place.
"So, this person is a doctor. Very Peculiar!" Pooja remarked.
"What about all this is not uncommon, Poo? Even if they are a doctor, why target you and Alex? How does this person even know you both?" Ethan said, a tinge of anger lingering in his tone.
Pooja absently fiddled with the card while suddenly something caught her eye. In tiny handwriting, the letters D.I.B.S.15. She presented it to Ethan.
"What is this supposed to mean?"
"It looks like some cryptic message to me. Maybe the murderer wrote it absently on this card. We need to infer its meaning. It can be crucial."
"Hmm. Seems, like we have a lot of investigation to do. But at first, let's note down the enigmas we need to find the answers of."
They grabbed a notebook and wrote down all the lingering inquiries and matters about which they were going to seek.
Who is Mr Davis? Why was he targeted?
Why did no one from his acquaintances never come to question about him?
Why did the murderer target Pooja and Alex? How does he know them?
How was the murder perpetrated?
The addresses
MedMinder Drug Store
D.I.B.S.15
"Ethan?"
"Hmm?"
"Should we call the medical store? They might have vital information about the person who bought their stuff."
"Sure they will, reckoning that the person who bought the stuff is the same as the one who murdered Mr Davis."
"Or, you know, we can go there. Like check out both the addresses personally? So many facts are not present on the 'net. We may find something worthwhile for the case or maybe, even find the mastermind?"
"I was contemplating the same thing. But I wanted to take Mark and Alex with us. After all, four brains are more dependable than two." Pooja snickered a little. 
"Sure. I will shoot them both a text to meet us up after their shifts get over." 
But there was no need to do that. When Pooja unplugged her phone from the charger, she saw their texts. Both of them had taken an off early and were en route to Ethan's penthouse.
After fifteen minutes, Mark and Alex arrived. Ethan and Pooja filled them up with everything they had come across.
Then they told them about their plan of visiting the two addresses. 
"That would be incredible. But before that, you both should know the autopsy results." Mark said. 
"The Autopsy result came?" Pooja asked. 
"Yup, this morning. And guess what?"
"The cause of death is not the throat slit. It is Acute Cyanide Poisoning. The throat was slit afterwards." Alex informed them.
"What the hell?" Pooja remarked, wide-eyed.
"All this is so seriously messed up, isn't it?"
"The person has a medical history. They would know the dosage. Also, looking at the kind of criminal he is, it would not have been too difficult for him to arrange the cyanide." Ethan stated. 
"But Why Mr. Davis? I don't understand" Alex queried curiously. 
"Let's get going. I am sure we will get at least some of our answers from these two addresses." 
The four grabbed their coats, took the three clues, packed their tab and set off. The first address on Lyon Avenue was not far from Ethan and Pooja's place. 
They arrived there in ten minutes and spent another five minutes in searching the store.
The drug store was not very busy, dimly illuminated and smelt fusty. 
The man at the counter didn't even notice them coming until, 
"Ahm" 
Ethan cleared his throat. 
The man almost jumped out of his seat. Regaining his composure, he said, "How, ahem, How may I help you?" 
"We need some information. Can you remember who was the person who bought these from you?" Pooja said, handing him the receipt. 
"I am sorry, but information of our customers is confidential. We can not reveal it to anyone except security personals or family member."
Uh Oh. Now what? Nothing a sprinkle of drama can't resolve. 
"Um, Actually the person who bought these from you was most probably my brother. And he is missing for the last three days. So we are searching for information which can lead up to him." Mark said.
Either The shopkeeper was disinterested in their explanation or whatever he said about confidentiality was a lie because he didn't question Mark. He just eyed him sceptically and revealed,
"It was four days ago. I don't remember quite well, but I can give you some information. It was a man of medium height, wearing a high collared black jacket. He wore sleek black sunglasses and a mask. He did not speak anything but handed me the list of items he needed.
He made his payment in cash. When I asked if he was a medical professional, he showed me his visiting card. The card seemed pretty old and unkempt, but the designation Dr. was visible. So I didn't think much and gave him his things. That's all I can recollect."
"Was the visiting card that he showed similar to this?" Ethan asked, presenting the visiting card they had.
"Let me see."
"Yup, the font does seem similar." 
"Seems like this might be our man. Thank you very much for the information." Mark said before they started to exit the shop.
"Wait a sec." The man at the counter beckoned them.
They turned back.
"What is it?"
"I just remembered something. The man, he gave me an extra 20 bucks. When I informed him that he had given me extra cash, he gestured me to keep it. Also, when he was handing over the money, he folded up the left sleeve of his shirt, and there were numerous cut marks on it." The man at the counter told them.
The instant they heard about the cuts, they got the confirmation of their lingering suspicions.
This man was the murderer, and he was the one who was sending them the bloody notes.
The four thanked the man, and as a gesture of gratitude handed him some bucks. Then they left the shop and set off for their next destination.
Once seated back in the car, Pooja said, "So now we know that we are following the right person. Maybe the second address will tell us more."
"Mark, How did you deduce the murderer to be a man?" Alex asked.
"Just took a wild speculation. And because I have,"
Mark stopped.
"had a brother, that came out spontaneously." Mark's voice held traces of pain and brought out the confrontation among his thoughts.
But he quickly regained composure and said, "But thank god the guess was right. If not, we would be in a hell of a mess."
Mark laughed a bit, but his laughter sounded somewhat void.
For the rest of the journey, there was no conversation. A deafening muteness fell in the car, but no one tried to rip through it.
The journey to the second address took 20 minutes.
But they were a bit taken aback from the situation of the place.
It was a cryptic, morose part of the city, and it was awkward for a doctor to set up their practice here. In the entire street, darkness lurked. Flickers of light were visible in some of the houses.
Ethan, Pooja and Alex started to walk down the street slowly to locate the private clinic, but Mark stayed behind.
It was as if distasteful remembrances came to him, inundating him, due to the sight in front of him.
There was a glimmer of identification of the area in his eyes.
After walking a few steps, Alex realized that Mark was not with them.
At first, she began to panic, but when she turned around and saw Mark standing by the car, sighed in relaxation.
"MARK, MARK" Alex beckoned him.
Alex's voice caused Ethan and Pooja to turned around. They, too, detected Mark and the three started to pace towards the car.
"Mark, what happened?" Alex asked after arriving at the car, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Then she spotted the tears rolling down Mark's face.
Before she could say anything, Mark hugged her and broke into stringent sobs. His entire body was shuddering with every cry.
Ethan and Pooja quickly went beside him, trying to calm him down while Alex held him in her embrace.
"Mark, Honey, what happened? Is something wrong? Are you feeling unwell or something?" Alex asked, panic apparent in her voice.
Sensing her dread, Mark tried to regain his composure. And he succeeded a bit.
Breaking himself from Alex's embrace but holding her hand for strength, he levelled up. The other three looked at him, concern and curiosity both unambiguous on their faces.
"T-T-This place, I k-know this place." Mark began, voice trembling a bit.
"You do?" Pooja asked.
"Y-yup. This place, it endures as the beholder of the pain my family went through. All our sufferings, all our cries started here and ended h-here." Mark said, on the verge of tears.
"Mark, if you don't want to talk about it, it is okay, you don't have to," Ethan said, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"N-No, I have to say this. I have to tell you."
Mark took a pause.
"T-T-This place is where m-my c-childhood home is."
The grief that we hide from the world, that we bury deep in our soul, when it comes out, it twists knives in a way that rips through all our soul leaving us as shredded as we were when we encountered it.
PS: This case had pulled strings which no one had expected. But will these strings tug the answers with them? This chapter feels like the beginning of the end. What do you think, is Mark's dilemma? What about Pooja's childhood? And what new challenge will the murderer place in front of them?
Every question will be answered and every Mystery will be solved. They might be Detectives by chance but their skills know no bound.
If you enjoyed the story, please like, leave a comment or reblog. Your feedback keeps me going 💕. Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you have a great day ahead.💕💕
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toomanyfandoms02 · 4 years
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The Transporter -Part Two- // Spencer Reid x Reader
Well here is part two of this whole new thing. I hope you guys like it :)
Word count ~ 2,630
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It was a weird feeling. It took mere seconds but I could feel all of it.
It was like stretching, it wasn't uncomfortable, it was just odd.
I stumbled a bit, taking in my surroundings. It was a nice little apartment, I was set in the kitchen. Ahead of me I could see what looked like two bedrooms, a bathroom and the kitchen/dining room was connected. There was an older looking laptop sitting on the dining table with a sign next to it.
*You're gonna need this at the bureau! Good luck :) I'll see you soon. (Hopefully with an update on Spencer? ;))*
I shoved the laptop in the case that was neatly set on the table, slinging it over my shoulder and staring at my new home. I couldn't believe this was happening. And I don't think it's ever going to register completely.
A loud knock brought me out of my trance, I was at the door quickly, greeted by a giddy woman.
"Hello! You must be y/n. Your sister said you would probably be here today. I'm Amanda, your landlord." She shook my hand enthusiastically. I assume that Christine introduced herself as my sister.
"Yeah, Chris said this was a nice place. I unfortunately think I need to be going. I think I'm suppose to be introducing myself at my new job."
"Ah yes! At the FBI. Good luck to you." She moved from my way and I had her point me towards the BAU.
Christine was correct, the BAU was only a 10 minute walk from my apartment. I was literally shaking with nerves and excitement. I had dreamed for *years* of meeting Spencer Reid, more realistically Matthew Gray Gubler. But now that it was happening? I was almost too scared to do it.
Almost.
I walked into the doors instantly being questioned by a young man at the front desk. "Are you looking for someone? Can I have a name?"
"Y/n y/l/n, and I'm looking for Aaron Hotchner. I believe I'm suppose to be introducing myself today, I'm a new recruit."
"Ah I see, the new profiler." He nodded, looking at the screen. He then gave me a floor number and I headed up. I was cracking my knuckles the whole way up, it was a nervous tick. As soon as the doors opened I recognized many people.
JJ was hunched over her desk obviously reviewing a case file. Hotch, Derek and Rossi were in Hotch's office discussing something. That's when I saw the reason I had even considered this completely. Reid and Emily were staring at the board in the conference room. Emily was clearly trying to point more things out so Reid could put together a proper profile.
I knew I had to keep my composure and be professional. I *also* realized I have to act like I don't know everything about these people. So I calmly walked to Hotchs office and knocked lightly on the door. Rossi opened the door with his eyebrows knit together.
"Do you need something? Have a case to propose?"
I was a little frozen. Seeing one of your idols up close was a little...*overwhelming*. How was I gonna act when I was around Spencer?
"Oh! Uh, no. I'm the new recruit?" It came out as a question, which I'm sure confused him even more. I shot my hand out to him to shake. "Y/n y/l/n. My sister said she briefed you on my experience." That was a small lie, I was just assuming and **hoping** she did. He smiled, taking my hand.
"Yes of course. Come on in." He swung the door open further so I could enter the office. Derek was leaned on a chair in front of Hotch, who was sitting at his desk. "I'm David Rossi, this is Derek Morgan and this is Aaron Hotchner, our unit chief." I shook Derek and Hotchners hands, they were just as welcoming as I had hoped. We discussed a few things before we were on out way to the conference room. I began cracking my knuckles again. Hotch looked down at me, I quickly realized he was attempting to profile me, and clearly succeeding.
"There's nothing to be nervous about Ms. Y/l/n. You will fit in perfectly here." He reassured. I nodded, shoving my hands in my pockets to only slightly prevent myself from cracking them profusely.
Then there I was, entering the heavily windowed conference room. I had recognized the photos on the board since I had watched Criminal Minds so many times.
"Oh my god Cold Comfort." I muttered to myself. That was the name of the episode. It was the case where a man had been embalming his victims while alive. I had landed myself on the exact date of a pretty important case.
"Hmm?" Derek questioned me. Hearing me whisper a bit. I just shook my head with a nervous smile.
Emily had turned around to wave but Spencer kept his face glued to the board, which I was partially grateful for.
"That is Doctor Spencer Reid and Emily Prentiss. This is our new recruit, Agent y/n y/l/n. She has a degree in Criminal Justice, she also minored in psychology and sociology. She has been profiling in a different department for four years and I've been told she is quite talented at it." At that comment Specer had whipped around. He was holding a dry erase marker in his mouth and a pen in his hand. It was taking every single cell in me to not squeal just a little bit. So I just smiled.
"Will you profile me?" He asked, pulling the marker from his mouth and setting it on some papers the were strewn across the large table. I raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Well statistically speaking if you have been doing this for several years, you *should* be pretty good at it. Considering you are being complimented on it implies that you are slightly above average for the actual limited years you have been doing it. So will you profile me?"
Are you kidding? I knew him like the back of my hand, this was going to be way to easy.
"Alright." I stood up a little straighter and smoothed out the skirt I was wearing. "You didn't have a particularly nuclear family kind of childhood. You lick your lips a lot, you've done it 4 times since I've been standing in this room, this is commonly learned from anxiety at a young age. I assume you have a pretty good IQ, considering you didn't use any contractions. It shows sophistication. I'm guessing you graduated highschool *way* early, I'm thinking...twelve? You look pretty young to be doing this kind of job, kind of like me. And I've been told you have multiple PhD's, that takes a while, even if you're a genius. But I graduated when I was sixteen. Nothing too special, only 2 years early. And lastly, I would guess you have an eidetic memory, correct? Theres a notebook sitting next to you. It even has your name printed at the top. It was made for you. But you haven't touched it since I entered this floor from what I can tell. You don't need it because everything is permanently in your mind." I cracked my knuckles once more, trying to gauge him again.
He wiped his hand over his face. "Wow, uh, that is incredibly detailed and accurate. Have you read any of my articles online?" I shook my head. "You seriously have no prior knowledge of me?" I shook my head again, which is kind of a lie you know? I mean, I knew *everything* about him. I knew a lot of things about all of these people. But really I knew most about him. He was like an idol to me. "That is incredible. How long did you say you've been doing this?" He asked with a tilt of his head. I couldn't help but smile more, he was even cuter in person and it was almost hard to stand.
"Four years. I worked as an intern under my uncle. He's the one that inspires me most." I probably shouldn't be discussing my real family, saying as they definitely won't ever know of them. What are the chances they would even want to anyway?
"Well I would love to meet him one day, he clearly mentored you well." Spencer said, looking at me hopefully.
Well shit. "Uh, yeah, maybe one day." I looked over at the door, more looking away because I was totally lying and did not want to be profiled, but I then saw JJ.
"Oh, this is Jennifer Jareau. She usually goes by JJ. JJ, this is y/n y/l/n. Our new profiler." Hotch gestured to her. JJ smiled sincerely and shook my hand.
"It's great to meet you. I heard your sister talking about you, it's a pleasure to have you on the team." Clearly Christine has set me up for immense success, which I greatly appriciated. I sat at the table, ready to listen to the details of the case that I remembered a good bit about. I quickly tucked my laptop under my chair.
"So yesterday, Brooke Lombardini our victim. Had a call out from a disposable phone directed to her mother. It is kinda of suspicious and definitely statistically impossible to prove that it is even her because it's only a whisper-" Hotch cut him off with a stern look. Spencer huffed lightly, continuing. "Anyway. There is slight evidence that she is alive. We are looking for someone with medical experience, considering he has the tools to embalm. It also appears that he is doing it while they are still alive." At this point, I was pretty happy that I already knew a lot about this case. Because it was really hard to focus when he talked, I loved it. So for about half of the time I was just watching him talk.
After being briefed, JJ took me to my desk, where she began to explain who was who in the office. Of course I already knew everything about them, but I really just wanted JJ's opinion on them.
"So that hunk over there," she gestured to Derek, "He would probably take a bullet for anyone. He has a very good heart and he's very hard working."
"Is Mr. Hunk Morgan your hunk?" I already knew the answer, but I wanted to tease her.
"Oh. No no. This is my hunk." She pulled her wallet out, showing me a picture if Will. "Will is a cop in another city." She looked at the picture lovingly. "But Morgan does have a weird relationship with Garcia." She then nodded at Penelope.
"Penelope is a very sweet, and incredibly quirky woman who is a blessing to the team. She will immediately start calling you sweety when you officially meet her. I'll bet money on it." I giggled a little and pretended to take notes which got her to laugh. "Reid is a special kind of sweet. He constantly tries to keep people safe. He's obviously a genius. He will talk your ear off about anything until you tell him to stop, so don't even get him started. He doesn't read social queues very well." I shrugged, setting my head in my hand as I peered into the conference room.
"I think he's sweet." I *now* realized that I seemed like a complete creep for thinking that if I had only known him for an hour. "I mean, he seems sweet. It's always nice to have a genius around right?"
"Curse and a blessing. Anyway, Hotch is a hard-ass, but he would do anything for this team. He's a great leader. Emily can be stern sometimes. She knows how to get answers out of people and she doesn't take any shit. And I'm sure you know Rossi, from his books?"
"Yes! He's seems great to work with."
"Yes, definitely. It's a weird team, but I wouldn't trade then for the world."
"Well I'm glad that you guys are so caringly taking me into your family."
"Of course, you'll be one of us in no time."
It wasn't long before I was starting my trek home. The walk was was very peaceful. It gave me a long time to soak in this wonderful universe. I had to walk through a park to get home, and all I could think was
*Wow, I could get use to this*
Once I was home, I flopped down on the couch, thinking about netflix but guess what?
*Netflix started their streaming site only two years ago*
Well that idea is out the window. I decided I was going to turn to disney channel and bask in the best decade of disney shows. But that would have to wait until I came back, I wanted to report things to Christine.
I grabbed my 'Come Back Device' and went to press it when I was interrupted by a knock for the second time today. I dropped the device, it landing on the couch safely.
"Coming, hold on." I walked to the door opening it to the last person I expected to see.
The one and only, Spencer Reid.
"Uh hi. You kinda left this under your chair in the conference room." He presented my laptop to me. My cheeks flushed for a second, knowing it was because I was distracted in there.
"Oh, thank you! Wait how did you-"
"Don't worry, I'm not some stalker." He waved his hands in defence. "I just looked at your file so I could bring this to you. Which also sounds kind of stalkerish but that was definitely not my intention. But you should know, if I was a stalker I wouldn't have come to you directly, that would be too-" I cut him off, I couldn't let him torture himself like this.
"Hey, Dr. Reid, I don't think you're a stalker." I giggled, grabbing my laptop from his hand. "Thank you though, for bringing it to me." He looked a little past me, at the couch.
"It was my pleasure. You can also call me Spencer. What is that?" He began pointing at the device.
"Oh uh, it's for my Halloween costume this year."
"And you're starting it now? In February?"
"Yeah!" I said a little loudly and enthusiastically. I lowered my tone, trying to think of some character in this timeline it could represent.... Bingo! "It's for an Iron Man costume. Just wanted it to be accurate. I leaned against the door frame, partially blocking his view of it.
"You like Iron Man?" I nodded. "I agree. I think that Robert Downey Junior is the perfect fit for him. I think it helps that he has a sort of troubled past already to fit his character well." Before he could drag me into a conversation like this, I stopped him. I didn't want to stop him. I loved his little rants. But I knew if I was pulled into a Marvel discussion, I will talk for hours.
"Yeah! I'm so sorry. I would really, trust me, really like to keep talking, but I am so exhausted and I'm not sure I would be good company. Thank you so much again for bringing this to me Dr.- I mean Spencer." I lifted it up and smiled.
"Yes of course. Any time. See you tomorrow Agent y/l/n."
"You can call me y/n."
He smiled with a little salute, "y/n."
And then he was gone. I huffed, heading back inside incredibly flustered and down right anxious. I swiftly grabbed the device and pressed the button, opening the portal back.
I had a *lot* to tell Christine.
(Do you guys have an suggestions on how to continue? I have some ideas, but I want your guys' input :))
Tag List!!~~~
@dillxpixkles
@natibugg31
@onceupona-diamond
@buck-barn
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geminimoonbeamx · 5 years
Text
Oh, Baby: Chapter One
A/N: Okay so I’ve literally had this in my drafts for the last...six months or so? And I figured I’d tweak it and edit and post it since I’ve been so AWOL on this site lately, and so that I can give you guys some new content from me.
Word Count: 3k+
Warnings: Heavy cursing. This chapter is pretty PG, talks of mental illness, unexpected pregnancy and contemplating abortion- but she doesnt go through with it. Smut to come. AND LOTS OF FLUFF TOO, I promise lol
Summary: After a drunken night, Y/N finds herself having to face the biggest decision of her life; is she ready for motherhood? And a better question, is Bucky Barnes, her long time friend and womanizer extraordinaire, ready for fatherhood? They’ll just have to go along for the ride and find out together. A Bucky Barnes x Plus Size Reader Story 
Chapter 1/6: The Baby Woe’s and Oh No’s
You knew it.
You’d known something was off, different, changed.
You sit on your toilet, your world spinning as you attempt to wrap your mind around what was going on. Everything seems sludge like, too slow and too fast and not real.
You’re definitely going into shock, you point out to yourself. The catatonic kind. You’ve been staring at the bright, sunny lemon print of the shower curtain, your eyes focused but not seeing. Your elbows rest on your knees and your hands cover the entirety of your lower face.
At least you’re not crying anymore. 
Nope, your body had moved past that-Maybe, it felt like the tears could start rolling again at anytime.
Oh god, what are you going to do?
Why, why, why?
Why you? You’d been a good person- well a decent person at least… You recycled and tipped more than twenty percent. Didnt vote for Trump and ate your vegetables.
And your life was just seeming to even out. You’d somehow landed your dream job a couple months back- every Wednesday night your voice could be heard on WNEX. You we’re making enough money to finally be comfortable- doing what you loved. Gaining a wide audience and wiggling your way into the industry. Your mind was so career oriented, so focused on your end goal that you’d never even considered something like this.
Throwing a big fat wrench in the gears.
One night, it had only been one stupid, drunken night. Hadn't you racked up enough karma coins to cover your ass for one fucking night?
Are you there god? It’s me, Y/N, and I really fucked up this time.
Wanda comes back into the tiled room a few minutes, her dark features soft and a colorful mug in her hand.
“Are you okay?” She gauges, gently, as she reaches out to you.
You snort and shrug, but accept the steaming cup from her anyway. You look down at the swirling, murky drink.
Wishing for just one moment that you could drown yourself in it.
“Look, babe, I know you’re dealing with some major shock right now- but maybe you should go lay down. We’ll figure it out later-” Wanda’s voice is even and you appreciate her being so calm and sure during all of this but you just can't process the situation enough to accept it.
You can't go lay down.
“Why not?” Wanda questions and you didn't realize you’d said that out loud, you hadn't even felt your mouth form the words.
Your head really is swimming. Disconnected from your body a little bit. You force yourself to take a drink of the tea as she gives you a more pointed look.
“Because I have to- I don't know. I have to figure all this out” You protest. You can't hear your voice, how spiked with anxiousness it is.
“There’s not much to figure out” Wanda supplies, unhelpfully as she leans against the counter, arms folded over her chest and you give her a look that’s half between a glare and a gape.
“Um, what the fuck do you mean? There’s so much to figure out, I don't even know where to start” You give a short, sharp, slightly hysterical laugh gripping the mug hard enough to hurt with one hand while cupping your forehead with the other.
“Okay, first things first. And this is the big one: do you want this?”
Well, that whole ‘I'm done crying’ thought you’d had before was a lie. You feel the tears well up once more and overflow, spill down your already swollen cheeks. Your face is hot. Your tummy is full of rocks.
You’d always hated crying. It never made you feel released or freed or lighter like it did for other people. It made you feel icky and stupid. And afterwards it always felt like you’d gotten punched in the nose.
Yes, you did have a therapist to work out those issues with, thanks.
Your mind doesn't know what to do with that question.
You look at Wanda, searching her face as though she might have the answers but she just shook her head and reached out her hand to rub your shoulder. That’s all she could offer. Her support in whatever path you we’re about to embark on.
And then you look down, at the countertop. That was usually littered with stray tubes of mascara or straightening irons. Bobby pins and half lit candles. All the things that resided in the bathrooms of girls in their mid twenties.
In place of those was now four pregnancy tests. All of which read positive.
The first two had been those double lined ones. Two bold lines- both times. Then you’d ran down to the bodega at the end of the block and gotten two more. And those we’re more straight to the point. They literally read the word pregnant- in a font that you don't think you’d ever forget.
Did you want this? Did you want a baby?
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“I dont know- I’m not ready. The timing is all wrong” You croak.
“Okay” Wanda coo’s “well there's alternatives then-” you squeeze your eyes closed at that thought “Either way we should make a doctors appointment to make sure you’re actually pregnant. I’ve read so many stories about how unreliable these things are”
She holds up one of the tests and rambles on about all of the online articles she’d come across. How some woman had taken a dozen of ‘em, gotten all positive results and then went in and had an empty uterus.
“For one, ew. I peed on that” You nod your head at the test in her hand and she rolls her eyes.
“Other side of it- and I held your hair when you got food poisoning from that shrimp shack. I’ve come into contact with worse body fluids of yours”
“For two- I’m pregnant. I know it. I’ve known it for weeks. I knew something was wrong and I just tried to...think it away, you know? Out of sight, out of mind? I sound insane” saying the words out loud makes you realize how...ludicrous those thoughts had been. But still. It was the truth.
She just nods though “You don't”
There’s a moment of silence. Stretching, as you stew in your reality.
“I’d be doing it alone” you whisper into the mug as you sip on it “I really dont think he’d want a baby”
“You would never be alone, you know that. You have so many people in your life that would support you with this” Wanda protests, sad that you’d even say that.
“You know what I mean” You push on. Because having a good group of friends and family wouldn't change the fact that you were possibly looking at the possibility of being a single mother.
If you decided to keep it, that is.
“Yeah I do- and I don't know if I agree with that. Bucky's a lot of things, an arrogant asshole at that top of that list, but he’s a good guy and I think he’d want to be involved. He doesn't give off deadbeat dad vibes”
All of that was true. Bucky is a good guy, at the core of him.
He was kind and decent and the two of you had been friends for years upon years. He was charming, magnetic and women loved him- you’d found it amusing, before you we’re the one in his bed after a drunken night a month ago.
He’d left your messages mostly on seen since then. You’d only sent a few, but still that had stung. Him icing you out the moment he’d gotten into your pants pissed you off, not only because it was rude but because it was expected.
You knew how Bucky was with women, it had been such an idiot move to sleep with him.
It made it all the more complicated that you ran in the same social circles- had all the same friends. Sam’s small promotion dinner a couple weeks ago had been extremely awkward for you, to say the least.
He’d earned himself the cold shoulder from you and no matter how many times he’d try to broach a conversation with you, crack a joke in your direction, or single you out in a group conversation you pretended he didn't exist.
“Damn, re-jec-ted” It had been so obvious that Clint had of course pointed it out, which was uncomfortable but expected because Clint had no filter like that.
Bucky had stopped trying after that- and started flirting back with the waitress that had been throwing herself at him throughout the night. You cut out early, claiming tiredness. And upset stomach. Whatever to get you out of there.
To say it was a shitty night was a bit of an understatement and you hadn't spoken one word to him since.
“I haven't talked to him since that night- and now I’m what, supposed to call him up and tell him I’m carrying his child because he doesn't properly know how to operate a condom?
“I don't know, yeah? It doesn't mean you two need to get married, but if you choose to keep this baby, that’s going to be a conversation you’re going to have to have” Wanda is so annoying sometimes. She was such a sharp thinking human- always grounded and level headed. She claimed it was from always having to be the “good twin” growing up.
Of course she was rationalizing this whole thing while you we’re floundering about it like a fish.
“I think I should make a doctors appointment” You just mutter. You’d rather focus your attention there. It was easier, cleaner for you. A goal you could actually accomplish.
And so that’s what you did.
//////
They were able to get you in at the end of the week, which in overpopulated New York City was a godsend. And still, it felt like far too long. Like the reality of it couldn't sink in until you talked to a medical professional so you we’re left in some kind of fucked up long until then.
You tried to keep your anxious mind busy, throwing yourself into work. Talking to people over the static airways of the radio about their lives; about the world and all of its workings was so much easier than talking to anyone about what was going on with you.
The only person who knew was Wanda and you’d canceled all of your other plans during the week, not able to face anyone. Not yet.
Lots of sleepless nights, staring at the ceiling. Thinking until your brain physically hurt.
And then you’d turned to you journal- maybe if you wrote everything down it would make sense. If you could see it all, inked out, you could make a decision.
Did you want this child?
Wanda had suggested making a pro’s and con’s list and while it sounded crazy and unhelpful, and you rolled your eyes at it ‘As though that will help’, you ended up doing it anyways.
You start with Cons, naturally. Always had been too damn negative.
Cons:
-I have no fucking idea how to be a mom
-Bucky???
-My job. My career. Who’s going to watch the baby while I work?
-How in the fuck am I going to financially support a baby.
-No room in the apartment/My room is fucking tiny and where will we put a baby
(Wanda said we can turn half of the living room into a playroom/makeshift nursery. How fucked up though? Not even a real nursery)
-No car? A baby on the subway? No thank you.
-Weird to explain to people even if Bucky wants to co-parent. All our friends??
-PAIN
-Pregnancy looks so painful. Birth looks scary. My poor vagine.
-Life is basically over
-The baby will not have a grandmother from your side...
You could keep going on, but you decide to stop there. You could go on, make the list pages and pages long but you decide against it.
Pros:
-I’ve always wanted to be a mom. Always dreamed of babies and motherhood, baby fever crashes over me in waves.
-Me and Bucky’s baby is going to be cute AF(and that just pure facts)
-I have a great support system- amazing friends and family who I know will help
-Bucky could want to be involved. He probably will...maybe?
-He has a big family, i think. The baby would have lots of family
-I don't want to have an abortion. All about pro-choice, but I just...don't know if I can.
That had made you bite the end of your pen.
Adoption?
Could you give a child that you went through nine months of pregnancy up for adoption? Knowing yourself- probably not. You cant even get rid of the moth hole ridden clothes at the back of your closet. Not comparing a baby to a jean jacket- fuck, see how unequipped you were for this?
-I’d be a good mom(I think)
-I could swing it financially. Maybe get a second job
-At least I have a good insurance plan now
-My life might have more of a purpose?
You hide the lists away in one of your many journals. Stick it in the wicker basket under your night stand- and revisit it too many times in those days between.
You make a lot of other lists in that time, too. 
//////
One of them sits tucked in your purse as you make your way to the eighth floor- Arms folded across your chest and the inside of your bottom lip speared between your teeth as the elevator takes you up.
Wanda stands beside you, of course. Sipping on her iced americano. You’d tried to tell her that she didn't need to come, that you were perfectly okay with going on your own. You’d gotten about two words out before she shut you down-
“I already took the afternoon off, don't be ridiculous”
You both know you wouldn't admit it, stubborn as you we’re, but you’d let out a big sigh of relief. You really didn't want to do this alone.
The waiting room is standard for this building, looks similar to the one that you sit in when you see your GP- save for a sign hanging about the door that labels it the OB-GYN.
Fake plants and those standard waiting room chairs that had that weird diagonal print on them TV’s that we’re playing the local news and tables stacked with months dated magazines. There was no windows though and it made the back of your neck feel hot.
The receptionists is nice. Middle aged with mild with droning, mellow voice. She checks you in fast and efficiently and tells you that you’ve got about a 15 minute wait on your hands.
Annoying, you think even though you give her a big grin and a sweet ‘thank you’. You’d been right on time. Why in all offices of all kinds is there always a fucking wait?
Wanda has plopped down on a chair in the corner and is fingering through an issue of LIFE, her long legs crossed at the knee. you sit next to her. The office air conditioner is blasting, it had been a muggy May in the city, but you feel overheated. You let the chunky cardigan you’d donned slip down one shoulder, exposing your skin to the chilly air.
You should feel the cold but you’re over heated. Nervous as hell. Why doesnt anyone else in this office seem nervous?
You tend to people watch when you get overly anxious like you are now. Tend to take in every little detail of every little thing around you.
There’s a black couple- the woman doesn't look pregnant but they’re holding hands tightly and they keep whispering to each other. He smiles and nudges her shoulder with his. Then there’s a Latina woman who looks just about ready to pop and is reading one of the kids book to a little boy with her eyes. A white lady, with twin carriers rocks them gently as she chats with a woman who looked to be related to her, maybe. Older and graying.
You feel like a creep but you can't stop looking at them all. Staring at each of the people who are at different stages of the same  life-path you found yourself on.
Wanda clicks her tongue as her dark eyes focus on the magazine. Muttering, her accent thick, about how the lenses they used for the shoot on the page was all wrong.
Her photographers eye was snobby and elitist.
“Y/N?” The nurse calls you back, not butchering your name which is nice and look over at your best friend.
“Are you sure you don't want me to come back with you?” Wanda whispers, big gingerbread eyes searching yours and you shake your head quickly.
You had to do this, on your own. What if...what if you ended up having to do this whole thing alone? You had to be grown, had to face this solo. That’s just how you felt, even if it might not be true.
“It’s just another appointment- I can do it on my own. I’ll live” there's a reasoning lilt in your voice that she doesn't quite buy but she nods all the same. Tells you that she’ll be waiting right there for you as you muster up all your courage and train your face into a smile, following the nurse into the back offices, the door mechanically closing behind the two of you.
The OB’s office is...warmer then you’d thought it would be. Her desk has frames of all types and her walls are plastered with colorful posters, making the alabaster of the wallpaper less daunting. There was even a window in here.
You’re perched up on the exam table/ chair thingy, staring out at the tall buildings across the street, at the people moving fast below on the sidewalks. You wonder what all of them are doing? How many of the have kids?...
When there’s a soft knock at the door your attention snaps back to the present.
Doctor Helen Cho is a petite Asian woman. She has glossy dark hair that's tied up in a clip high on the  back of her head, and her voice is friendly and her expression open as introduces herself to you and reaches out to shake your hand.
“I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you, too” You sound so much surer and more confident then you feel. It had always been your party trick- meeting new people and being able to talk to them. Leaving trails of barley there acquaintances in your wake.
“So it says here that you think you’re pregnant, yes?” She gets right to it, and your appreciative for it.
“Yeah, I know I am.  I took four tests and they all came out positive and I...I feel really off” you try to explain it, poorly but she seems to understand.
“When you say off, do you mean like bad feeling off or?” She probes as she sits at her desk, swivels her chair to face you. Her chocolate almond eyes weren't piercing or clinical, just waiting.
“Not really bad? But I’ve just been so tired lately and I’ve had like, zero appetite. And my breasts have been so sensitive that it hurts to put on a bra” as you tell here these things you could slap your head for not assuming you were pregnant before you’d taken the tests.
Dr. Cho hums and nods as she looks over her tablet “Well from the look of these results from those blood and urine tests your nurse went ahead and gave you when you came in, I can tell you that you are definitely about nine weeks pregnant- so those symptoms are right on with where you are”
You inhale and exhale, bigly. It’s real. It’s been real, was a notion, a happening but now...it’s so freaking real.
And there's a real life changing decision to be made-
That you’d already made before you’d even walked into this office but now seemed even clearer. Crystal, in that moment of clarity.
“I want to keep it” Your confident as you say it. Your voice cracks with some kind of emotion you couldn't even begin to explain, but you’re confident. You’re sure.
Dr. Cho grins at you, and stands, congratulating you then, after she’s sure you even want a congratulations. You like her, think you might.
It’s hard to focus on her voice though because all your mind can think of is the next big obstacle, the next big step in all of this.
How were you going to tell Bucky?
Okay guys? I posted? Crazy right? lol give me some feedback! Comment and tell me what you thought of this. I absolutely love interacting with you guys, but I’m sure ya’ll know that. 
Also- the taglist for this story is still OPEN, so if you’d like to be tagged in future chapters just ask!
@peacefulwriter88 @jaamesbbarnes @jalapenobarnes @brieannakeogh @gifsbysimplysonia @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @lostinspace33 @4theluvofall @plumfondler @tatathekissypotato @siren-kitten-his @skishenanigans @geekyweed @spidey-babe-parker @lastfallenstar @rachelle-on-the-run @prettybubblesintheair @dani-si 
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mystic-sky · 7 years
Note
I'm in the mood for angst lol. If you don't mind, I'd like to request Zen, Jumin, Jaehee, Saeran, and V dealing with MC's death. I'm thinking probably sudden death, like an accident or a medical condition she wasn't aware she had, etc., but tbh I'm gonna leave all that up to you. ^-^
WARNING SENSITIVE CONTENT: READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
I got a little emotional myself so i had to put that there
it got a lil dark for me with V’s
I’ve never done angst before? I don’t think I have. But I’ll give it a shot, enjoy :)
Zen
He wasn’t there when he heard that had you collapsed. His heart dropped when he received a call from Jumin, his least favorite person, about the news.
“I’m a little busy right now. What the hell do you want, trust fund kid?” He muttered into the phone.
“This is serious, Zen. You need to come to the hospital on main street. It’s MC, she.. she isn’t okay..” Jumin trailed off.
“What? What happened?” Zen said.
“Mr. Han, she’s not breathing.”
“It says that she has a DNR on file.”
“I have to call you back. You need to come here, fast.” Jumin said.
The line went dead and Zen stood there.
“I have to go.” He said to his supervisor.
“But we still have one more scene to cover-
“This is urgent. My girlfriend’s in the hospital.” He says, grabbing his jacket. He bolted to the nearest train station, hopping over the turnstile.
He got there 15 minutes too late, baffling all the medical professionals with questions after a heartfelt crying session.
(Let’s pretend MC has that unspecified disease that Kaori had from Your Lie in April, if you’ve ever seen that anime before, yeah?)
He felt like shit, everyone was there except for him.
“I don’t understand. What do you mean she had a DNR?”
“You don’t think…that MC knew she was sick..” Jaehee inquired.
“Nonsense! She would’ve told me! I know everything there is to know about her!” Zen spat.
“The doctor’s said she was on all sorts of medications…that she was only prolonging the inevitable…” Jumin said, loosening his tie.
You both didn’t live together, how would was he supposed to know that?
Zen peered back through the hospital door window, before walking in the room once again.
You were laying their peacefully.
You looked weary and pale now, compared to how he saw you this morning.
“I didn’t even know.. Why didn’t you tell me? You didn’t want me to worry? Well, look at me now..I’m a mess.” He said, looking down at you.
He lent down to kiss your still warm forehead.
He stayed with you for hours, until he was forced to leave.
Funeral was too much
You didn’t have family so it was kind of just the RFA
Jumin
He was on a business trip when he heard the news
He had actually been begging to bring you along but you insisted that he went alone.
“MC, I’ll pay for your plane ticket and everything. You don’t have to worry about a thing.” He said, snuggling into you. Little did he know this would be the last time he’d be sleeping with you since his flight was in the morning. 
“Jumin, I can’t just get up and come with you whenever you go on a business trip. Besides, it’s only for two days. You’ll be fine.” You insisted.
“But I’ll miss you too much.” He said, leaving kisses on the back of your neck. 
“I’ll be here when you come back.”
Less than 48 hours later, you had died in a car crash.
He had landed in and been in Dubai for only 4 hours and of course he booked it back in minutes to see you.
“I just…I just saw her this morning…” Jumin said, biting back tears. “There’s no way she could actually be gone.”
When he got to the hospital he was more angry than grieving.
“What do you mean there was nothing you could have done to save her?!” He’s giving the doctors a hard time.
“She had died on impact, Mr. Han. Her car… it stopped moving in the middle of a main street. And then the truck just came and rammed into her. The weight of it came down, nearly scraping the whole upper half of the vehicle, along with her in it.” Said the medical examiner.
The funeral was the hardest for him
closed casket 
He found himself sitting in front of it after the viewing when everyone left.
“You told me I’d be fine. I don’t feel fine at all right now MC.” 
“You should’ve just let me bring you with me. I know how difficult I can be sometimes but I just want..I wanted to protect you.”
He’s a mess
I’m a mess
Jaehee
This one was some sort of freak accident.
She was there
You both went to the mall and there was this huge gas tank explosion that went off in one of the lower levels
There were reports of people who could smell gas but the staff didn’t move quick enough and a number of people died 
including you
“Jaehee, I think we should save the shopping for another day. Besides, I’m getting a weird vibe and it smells like gas on the whole first floor.” You told her while you both were inside one of the stores.
“I agree. I’ll pay for this and then we can leave.” She smiled.
Every second counts, you both could’ve made it out of there if she put down the dress she wanted.
“We were both holding hands, walking towards the exit. And then suddenly there was this really loud sound..and lots of shaking. The upper floors didn’t hold up and started collapsing. That’s when she pushed me out the way.. and.. and..” Jaehee choked out in her hospital bed. 
Zen was there to console her.
jaehee x zen
ill go home
lots of hugs for Jaehee
she’s too precious for this
Saeran
You had always been a bit on the wild side, something he wasn’t too fond of.
You recommended going hiking one weekend.
As usual, if he thought it would make you happy, he’d go along with it.
“Saeran, how about we go hiking in the mountains this weekend? I’ll even pack up a picnic basket with snacks and stuff.” You said cheerily.
“You wanna have a picnic in the mountains? Can’t we just go to the park like a normal couple?” He said, not really up for it in the beginning.
“That’s the first time you called us a couple!” You cooed, literally jumping onto him on the couch.
“If you don’t get off me I’ll take it back!” He spat.
“You don’t mean that! I love you so much Saeran.” You said, showering him with kisses.
He’s a blushing mess right now.
The weekend comes and you guys go out on your hiking trip. After a sunset picnic dinner you guys head back down.
“Are you sure we can walk on this bridge, Saeran?” You said, checking it’s sturdiness. 
“It’s the quickest way down.” He insists. “See, the city lights are that way. We could go back the way we came but that’d take another hour.” He said.
“O-Okay..”
He walks ahead of you and you trail slowly behind him. 
Believe it or not he slipped first, having one of his feet break through one of the wooden logs.
“Shit, my leg!” He cries out.
“Saeran!” You say. “Don’t worry I’m coming to help you!’ 
You run towards him, having several of the wooden logs break. The whole bridge collapses now, sending both of you towards the bottom of the pit.
Saeran survives the fall, having being cradled by a tree on the way down, whereas you suffer a different fate.
Your body hits the grounds, breaking your bones, etc.
It takes a while for Saeran to come to, before he climbs down from the tree with aching limbs.
He finds you there, no signs of being alive. He realizes that your gone and lets out an agonizing scream.
“God why?! She did nothing wrong! I’ve sinned far more than she ever could have!”
He spends the rest of his life thinking it should’ve been him.
Might never love again
V (Jihyun)
You two had gotten into a fight about god knows what
Being the stubborn person you are, you storm out of the house, leaving him to think about the issue
You turned off your phone, not wanting to be bothered
Of course, maybe 15 mins later he goes out looking for you
He hates it when you both fight, mostly because it took him so long to start loving someone again. You mended his broken heart and he couldn’t bare the fact that you were upset with him.
You were walking in the dead of night, nothing could be seen but the street lights and parked cars on the curb.
“I don’t like it when we fight either. Maybe I should go back home.” You say to yourself, deciding to turn back and go home. You knew he’d be willing to talk it out. That’s just how he is.
You’re walking back home now, thinking about what to say to him. You wanted him to know you were sorry, that you didn’t mean to yell at him. You were just angry.
Then, you heard a bottle roll behind you.
“Is someone there?” You say, whipping your head behind you. There was nothing. Nothing but cars on the curb. Or so you thought.
You were speed walking now.
You turned you phone back on and called Jihyun, who immediately answered the phone.
“MC! I was so worried about you! I kept calling you but it kept going to voicemail. Where are you?! Are you oka-
“I think I’m being followed. I’m scared Jihyun.” 
“Where are you?! Go towards the main street with lots of people, okay? Find a store or a gas station!”
“I’m walking home. The main street is back in the other direction- where I heard the sounds.”
“I’m coming down the street right now! Keep walking. And don’t look back, they might attack you if they know you suspect them!” He says.
“Okay.”
You kept walking but the person behind only walked faster, grabbing you.
“Now, what’s a pretty young thing like you doing out here at this time of night?” 
“Let go of me!” Swung your fists, dropping the phone.
“MC?! Hello, MC?!” He was yelling into the phone now. He jetted down the street, searching for you.
“Don’t give me a hard time now-AHH!” Said the attacker as you stepped on his foot.
You bolted down an alleyway, only to be caught at a dead end.
“Stay away! Dammit I said stay away!” You screamed.
Jihyun was running down the street he thought you were on.
“She should be here. This is the only way you can walk to get back towards the apartment.” He could barely breathe. He’d been panicking since he lost contact with you.
It wasn’t until he found your phone, with the call still going, that he assumed the worst.
“She must be this way then.” He said, peering into the dark alleyway.
He ran down the dark path, finding a man fondling your limp body.
“Get your hands off of her!” Jihyun snapped at this point, throwing a nearby brick at the man’s skull, immediately knocking him out.
There was blood everywhere, now a mixture of the man’s and yours.
He dropped to his knees, beside your body, cradling you.
“MC, wake up.” He didn’t sound like himself but he didn’t care.
You didn’t move.
He lent down towards you nose and mouth, and there was nothing.
His tears spilled onto your lifeless body and the longer he held you the more his hands became soiled with blood. 
He was too late and he knew that.
42 notes · View notes