#lot of independent as well

[michaelgovehateblog]

Fuck the tories sucks to suck

#as much as i dislike current labour i am still happy to see major conservative losses #lot of independent as well #which is cool #uk politics

[aronarchy]

Why we don’t like it when children hit us back

To all the children who have ever been told to “respect” someone that hated them.

March 21, 2023

Even those of us that are disturbed by the thought of how widespread corporal punishment still is in all ranks of society are uncomfortable at the idea of a child defending themself using violence against their oppressors and abusers. A child who hits back proves that the adults “were right all along,” that their violence was justified. Even as they would cheer an adult victim for defending themself fiercely.

Even those “child rights advocates” imagine the right child victim as one who takes it without ever stopping to love “its” owners. Tear-stained and afraid, the child is too innocent to be hit in a guilt-free manner. No one likes to imagine the Brat as Victim—the child who does, according to adultist logic, deserve being hit, because they follow their desires, because they walk the world with their head high, because they talk back, because they are loud, because they are unapologetically here, and resistant to being cast in the role of guest of a world that is just not made for them.

If we are against corporal punishment, the brat is our gotcha, the proof that it is actually not that much of an injustice. The brat unsettles us, so much that the “bad seed” is a stock character in horror, a genre that is much permeated by the adult gaze (defined as “the way children are viewed, represented and portrayed by adults; and finally society’s conception of children and the way this is perpetuated within institutions, and inherent in all interactions with children”), where the adult fear for the subversion of the structures that keep children under control is very much represented.

It might be very well true that the Brat has something unnatural and sinister about them in this world, as they are at constant war with everything that has ever been created, since everything that has been created has been built with the purpose of subjugating them. This is why it feels unnatural to watch a child hitting back instead of cowering. We feel like it’s not right. We feel like history is staring back at us, and all the horror we felt at any rebel and wayward child who has ever lived, we are feeling right now for that reject of the construct of “childhood innocence.” The child who hits back is at such clash with our construction of childhood because we defined violence in all of its forms as the province of the adult, especially the adult in authority.

The adult has an explicit sanction by the state to do violence to the child, while the child has both a social and legal prohibition to even think of defending themself with their fists. Legislation such as “parent-child tort immunity” makes this clear. The adult’s designed place is as the one who hits, and has a right and even an encouragement to do so, the one who acts, as the person. The child’s designed place is as the one who gets hit, and has an obligation to accept that, as the one who suffers acts, as the object. When a child forcibly breaks out of their place, they are reversing the supposed “natural order” in a radical way.

This is why, for the youth liberationist, there should be nothing more beautiful to witness that the child who snaps. We have an unique horror for parricide, and a terrible indifference at the 450 children murdered every year by their parents in just the USA, without even mentioning all the indirect suicides caused by parental abuse. As a Psychology Today article about so-called “parricide” puts it:

Unlike adults who kill their parents, teenagers become parricide offenders when conditions in the home are intolerable but their alternatives are limited. Unlike adults, kids cannot simply leave. The law has made it a crime for young people to run away. Juveniles who commit parricide usually do consider running away, but many do not know any place where they can seek refuge. Those who do run are generally picked up and returned home, or go back on their own: Surviving on the streets is hardly a realistic alternative for youths with meager financial resources, limited education, and few skills.

By far, the severely abused child is the most frequently encountered type of offender. According to Paul Mones, a Los Angeles attorney who specializes in defending adolescent parricide offenders, more than 90 percent have been abused by their parents. In-depth portraits of such youths have frequently shown that they killed because they could no longer tolerate conditions at home. These children were psychologically abused by one or both parents and often suffered physical, sexual, and verbal abuse as well—and witnessed it given to others in the household. They did not typically have histories of severe mental illness or of serious and extensive delinquent behavior. They were not criminally sophisticated. For them, the killings represented an act of desperation—the only way out of a family situation they could no longer endure.

- Heide, Why Kids Kill Parents, 1992.

Despite these being the most frequent conditions of “parricide,” it still brings unique disgust to think about it for most people. The sympathy extended to murdering parents is never extended even to the most desperate child, who chose to kill to not be killed. They chose to stop enduring silently, and that was their greatest crime; that is the crime of the child who hits back. Hell, children aren’t even supposed to talk back. They are not supposed to be anything but grateful for the miserable pieces of space that adults carve out in a world hostile to children for them to live following adult rules. It isn’t rare for children to notice the adult monopoly on violence and force when they interact with figures like teachers, and the way they use words like “respect.” In fact, this social dynamic has been noticed quite often:

Sometimes people use “respect” to mean “treating someone like a person” and sometimes they use “respect” to mean “treating someone like an authority” and sometimes people who are used to being treated like an authority say “if you won’t respect me I won’t respect you” and they mean “if you won’t treat me like an authority I won’t treat you like a person” and they think they’re being fair but they aren’t, and it’s not okay.

(https://soycrates.tumblr.com/post/115633137923/stimmyabby-sometimes-people-use-respect-to-mean)

But it has received almost no condemnation in the public eye. No voices have raised to contrast the adult monopoly on violence towards child bodies and child minds. No voices have raised to praise the child who hits back. Because they do deserve praise. Because the child who sets their foot down and says this belongs to me, even when it’s something like their own body that they are claiming, is committing one of the most serious crimes against adult society, who wants them dispossessed.

Sources:

“The Adult Gaze: a tool of control and oppression,” https://livingwithoutschool.com/2021/07/29/the-adult-gaze-a-tool-of-control-and-oppression

“Filicide,” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Filicide

#repost of someone else’s content #medium repost #Alba M. #purity culture #ageism #adultism #youth oppression #childism #child abuse #parental abuse #youth rights #youthlib #youth liberation #parricide #nuclear family abolition #anarchism #note: I would consider reevaluating the demonization of adults who kill their parents too #many victims remain entrapped well into adulthood #there are still a lot of issues of economic dependency and control especially for young adults #and I don’t think such a totalizing power imbalance engendered in childhood is so easily levelled #even if an adult does become financially independent #likewise for adult victims of intimate partner abuse: also structurally made difficult for them to leave #even if not criminalized to the same degree #anti-abuser aktion

[venomgaia]

you were AEDD heathcliff in the stream chat?? :0 <- guy who had been pasting the entirety of wuthering heights during stream 5

Eheeh yep! That was me! I was in i think all of the streams, but on my first visits i showed up like a normal person and then pretty quickly joined the heathcliff horde.

LMAO I WAS WONDERIN ABT THAT. Glad to see that theres some of us from stream that hang out on tumblr! Hope you're havin a great day!

#driftoodles #heathcliff #limbus company #the power of 6 telepoles now binds hundreds of us together #there were a lot of heathcliffs most of them were being played by the same person #i wouldve shown up as erlcliff bc i enjoy him a lot but there were a few already i think. as well as sm telepoles. so aedd it was #there was a kleinhammer independent of everyone else...klein heath that was in stream yesterday i hope yr havin a swell one mate #stream was a lot of fun! im currently taking a break bc i have sm more icons to draw for the discord chat now that shicliff can be happy #but i gotta rest more often now cuz of my rsi/tendonitis...

[boyfridged]

#sorry for the 3 jokers jumpscare. #but it makes sense here. #btw i also like the tfz take of jay being a bit more aware and saying that bruce did not make him. he raised him #and i don't think that jason's belief that bruce made him is a fixed and consistent part of his outlook re: his past #i think it fluctuates a lot. because jason does like to think of himself as completely independent and autonomous as well. #hm.. idk i was going to add a lot more here but i like how it looks rn. #dc #web weaves #phantom pains #jay.zip #jay.txt #jason todd

[torgawl]

i keep thinking about how “is this what justice means to you, answer me neuvillette”, despite having been used in a case all those hundred of years ago, was probably a question that haunted - and still haunts - neuvilette during the entire time he has been chief of justice. i keep thinking about how they highlighted his struggles through time with both carole and wriothesley's trials. how guilty and powerless neuvillette must have felt for not being able to support and save those he recognised as vulnerable and victims before a system that corrupted their fates but that he wasn't able to change despite his position. the theme of being a casualty of a system no matter if you're the victim or the perpetrator in its eyes. the way neuvillette took, in both cases, things into his own hands. even if it was too late to fix the hurting carole and those who cared for her went through, even if it was too late to save her life; even if it was impossible to change wriothesley's past, his verdict and subsequent imprisonment; neuvillette went above and beyond, making use of his influence, to allow both melusines and wriothesley the opportunity of a better future - to melusines by making sure they weren't discriminated, to wriothesley by supporting his attempt at a second chance in life. i think part of the reason he's so intriguing is our awareness that this internal conflict he's bound to have is so complex. you have a chief of justice, or a judge, that is supposed to be imparcial and follow the law stictly confronted with situations of social injustice, unable to protect those who rely on him. you have someone who understands better than anyone what it means to be an outcast, being able to relate to those who are ostracised and have their pain weaponise against them. you have, in vautrin's case, a friend who cannot even showcase his own pain and is still expected to fullfil his juridical duties despite being personally related with those involved in the case. someone who people constantly turn to but whom he feels like he has no right to turn to himself. it's about the conflict between his feelings and his duty, between what's expected of him and what he can actually do. i think that's why the end of his story quest is so emotional and why it's so heartwarming to have him realise he isn't an outcast anymore, that he has a community there for him too. because a system is a system and he will probably never be able to save everyone, because yes he isn't human, but it doesn't mean he doesn't deserve to belong or that an active demonstration of love towards individuals and people he can relate to rather than the theoretical concept of humanity isn't meaningful. in fact, i'd it's a lot about that, about finding ways to be kind and how community gives meaning to life; how personal relationships and targeted kindness can shape society, or at least i think so

#i don't know if this makes sense but i like how character's stories in fontaine are interconnected in the perfect way that they're used to #give depth to each other while also existing perfectly independently #i forgot to add navia's story to the post but that's also another scenario used to characterise neuvillette #the same way wriothesley's backstory exists independently but it's also used to give depth into neuvillette's character and his motivations #the same way navia and clorinde's probably will as well #i always headcanoned (is that a verb 😂) neuvillette and wrio's friendship stemming from neuvillette trying to atone to his silence during #wrio's trial. i think it makes sense. i think it probably meant a lot to wrio too to have someone be so trustworthy after everything he #went through the betrayal from his adoptive family and his only aid through his life being the melusines who aren't human #and neuvillette being that sort of comforting older figure especially probably feels familiar to wrio #i have no idea what i'm trying to say actually i have a big headache at the moment and i feel almost delirious but i just love the concept #of neuvillette as a character and i think a lot about his friendship with wriothesley how it began and the grief and guilt neuvillette #probably still carries #but also about how he also gets the chance to a brighter future and how he achieves it so naturally without even realising #how he never expected anything from his compassion even if he saw it as duty and didn't interpret his own kindness as anything other than #his own responsabilty towards others #like idk am i making sense??? #he's just so cool 😂 #like yeah there's a layer of there's no reason he would have any animotisity towards humans because they're not at fault for the primordial #one's actions but from that to actually actively being so empathetic and compassionate goes a bit of a long way?! #okay i'm over i'll shut up this is probably si confusing i apologise if anyone read this mess shsjhs #this is also influenced by my tbk brainrot because loving others actively is a big theme and i just think that's beautiful actually #genshin thoughts #genshin impact #my post

[ziracona]

Me defending the New California Republic whenever I see people calling them worse or just as bad as the other NV factions

#they aren’t PERFECT but they’re on par with independent for totally different reasons & they’re worlds better than house or Caesar and it’s #genuinely insane to suggest otherwise I will go to BAT for them. they’re drowned in beurocracy and being a new nation & damn right they’re #flawed. but a lot of them /try/. and it damn well matters and it damn well shows #new california republic #fallout new vegas #tbh unless the courier is a wildly specific type of person capable of building a country government system in their wake NCR is in the long #run easily the best chocie just all 4 choices suck. that’s kinda the point. but for a given value yeah

[windwardstar]

you know it might just be that my tendency to overwrite might have something to do with the fact my chapters end up being 15k even after undergoing mitosis

#like obviously im at the point where im throwing in the kitchen sink bc well the point of this fic is if i wanna write it i do #but also like .. i once had very very short scenes and chapters like 90% were under 1k short #and i know a lot of it was that necessary detail got left out #i was underwriting then #but now i have def swung too far this way #fortunately i just write for fun so like i dont actually have to address the overwriting issue #but it is 3am and im awake so it is ponder things time #like the fact the current chapter is at like 15k and i still have at least three scenes left if not more #because the first four chapters are essentially fics in their own right #but also the chapters after the first four would feel weird if the first four chapters were to declare independence and create a series

[isfjmel-phleg]

🌋

#random personal stuff #personal whining feel free to ignore #am currently filled with spite and general I'll-Show-YOU-ness regarding a skill I never learned #it was implied recently that I do not know how to do this thing because of lack of interest #like I just woke up one morning and decided to be a burden on society #I KNOW perfectly well that knowing how to do this would give me greater independence #do you think I haven't been bearing the weight of this guilt most of my life #not learning was a situation beyond my control #long story weird upbringing unhelpful people lack of opportunity resultant anxiety etc. #anyway I've had it and I'd love to go out and prove that I'm not really worthless #...unfortunately I live in a small town where there's no place for someone like me to learn #because the system assumes that you are a teenager and your parents or school will teach you #or else (I suppose) that knowledge of this thing is written on every adult's heart already #so yeah...this is also a lot of why I never learned #(excuse me while I get angry for a moment) #I hate this. I hate the system. I hate living in a small town with extremely limited resources. #I hate whatever motivated the people who should have been helping me not to give me the opportunity and resources to learn. #(rant over sorry) #anyway I will eventually figure this out #but in the meantime it is Frustrating

[sillybouquetoflillies]

i keep thinking i rly didnt go thru that much growing up, but idk, everytime i tell someone abt my life, they say i did and kinda just like sit in shock abt it. am i just internet brained or smth, or am i just dramatic?? i rly dont think ive earned a lot of the symtoms of someone who was traumatized that i have. or maybe i havent been in a safe place for long enough to process things??? i dunno. maybe someday far away in the future ill figure things out

#i let myself sit n accept that i did go thru smth.. maybe that i didnt totally remember or that i blurred out the details of n idk #i keep feeling like an imposter n like i shouldnt be feeling it. i didnt rly like how ive been acting #but like also i let a lot of stuff out of the box in my brain doing that n idk how 2 put it back or deal with it #so now i just feel like a half untangled mess with 0 stability bc in that 'growth n discovery' period i realized almost everyone in my life #wasnt someone i wanted 2 keep around #so now its rly just me n my bestie that r close n i keep everyone else at arms length #how tf did i get on rambling abt this omggg #ugh i am srsly such a mess n i cant find the root n i think thats whats freaking me out the most #i hate not being able 2 explain why im feeling a certain type of way or justify it in anyway #i just wanna feel okay n stable n be a fun person 2 be around again!!!! #i wanna be completely independent but like.... everything is so expensive n i have no interest in anything that would pay well #i wish my sw stuff would take off but i think im too messy 4 ppl 2 wanna stick around n also i dont think im super attractive unfortunately #I DUNNO #i dont have any answers atm n its freaking me out #i either wanna figure out how to be okay with not having answers or to get the answers and solve my problems #n i also dont wanna depend on other ppl 2 solve them for me #i just wanna be a whole.. well rounded person who can take care of themselves n do what i want #while also being a cute puppy thats rly rly rly fun 2 play with n is super helpful n supportive 2 the ppl it cares abt 🥰 #i am so sick of these silly dumb messy fears n emotions that keep me stuck in boring ruts #i wanna go out n have my own fun n be my own person n stop being so scared of everything!!!!! #its okay if things go bad!!!! its just more stories 2 tell ppl!!!! ppl love my stories!!!! ugh i just needa put myself out there #i just needa find smth fun 2 do that keeps me around fun ppl #i just dont know what yet #concerts r fun but idk no one super interesting is touring here rn n i need smth more frequent #ok i think this ramble is ovr #im rly sry if ur reading this!!!! i love u vry much n hope ur having a wonderful day!!!!!!!!!

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#aaaand thats a 3rd doctor. a psychiatrist. who listened to me ans thought: mm sounds like bip0lar lol #me: wow its so easy to get diagnosed as bip0lar. thats bc u r exhibiting lots of depression and a limit amount of mood elevation. that's #like. thats what bip0lar is. she was like yea ppl with bip0lar 2 spend like 75% of time being depressed and a lil elevated mood... which #sounds like what u r describing. me: #...yeah. but again its complicated by the 0cd and spectrum issues. but she independently brought up 4dhd. just when i was like no its all #0cd. here we r again. stuck back in the messy overlap. but whatever i got proscribed bip0lar medicine. lam1ctal. we'll see #bc everyone i talk to is like. we need to control the mood 1st. like so u dont die. and im like hm yeah good call lol #she seems super cool tho. like i would love to just talk to her. ugh. she wants to get a handle on the mood and then maybe add a stimulant #bc shes had it happen in thr past where someone comes in with debiltating 0cd and got treated with lam1ctol and a stimulant and the #obsessive rumination stopped. so well see. idk if ill actually qualify as 4dhd enough. well see. fingers crossed #my mood is a lil elevated rn so its all fun. well see if we tip off a cliff bc im getting less sleep and go go going #unrelated #ugh im scared to start the medine tho bc the ssri i got proscribed fucked me up so much. which is also an indicator of bip0lar #god dammit. if this works im gonna have to actually accept the idea of being bip0lar. i mean. it makes sense being on that spectrum #is just sounds insane and i was not expecting it despite my fucking obsession with understanding wtf my deal is #idk. whatever. doesnt matter

[sailforvalinor]

.

#oh my gosh I forgot to mention this but I got connected with the most wonderful church here #it’s an international church so there are a lot of people cycling in and out #and it’s on the 7th floor of a building and a bit hard to find #but it is absolutely wonderful and the people are so welcoming #I’ve met SO MANY people and I feel like I’m doing well with socializing for once #I made friends with a couple of girls and we’ve run around and done fun stuff together and had actual serious conversations #and like I’m wondering if one of the reasons God has me here is to teach me how to be a member of a church family independent of my family #because you know being the preachers kid—that has expectations. you’re at church on Sunday because your dad’s in the pulpit #(not that that’s actually the only reason for me but that’s what it looks like to other people) #here though I’m at church because I want to be there. I’m an independent woman who chose to come to church on her own #and I’m really enjoying it! #Val’s gone globetrotting

[hell-heron]

I think Percy Phelps and Mary Sutherland are some of my favorite clients bc they hit a very similar characterisation note that I like, which is Dumb Of Ass + slightly annoying/flawed in an histrionic way but however EXTREMELY proactive, it gives such an unique charming flavor to the case that really works for me in distinguishing them in a comparatively homogenous mass of clients

#i tend to in general have lots of affection for young professionals being given scammy opportunities so violet hunter and hall pycroft too #and mr melas mr melas my beloved #but i think the queering the basically assistant detective/absolute scammed ninny binary really gives phelps and sutherland the edge #plus the theme of trying to make it in the working world is strong with them as well #mary insisting in her clerical work and independent income despite visual defect and not really needing to #and percy a bright career threatened by caffeine addittion :( #letters from watson #op

[lunannex]

The day people stop mischaracterizing Kaveh and Alhaitham is the day I will finally be happy

#alhaitham isn’t mean he’s just very blunt #kaveh isn’t a helpless damsel in distress #i mean #he IS in distress #just not in the way you think #people dumb-down kaveh so much it’s so annoying #he graduated with honors!!! yeah he’s a little gullible but he’s not fucking stupid #also this whole ‘kaveh wouldn’t know how to function without alhaitham’ bullshit #besties he was practically taking care of himself after his dad died because his mother fell into a very deep depression #and THEN she moved to fontaine and he was living alone #he went to school and GRADUATED TOP OF HIS DARSHAN #everyone wanted him to work for them after he graduated #he built a palace and YEAH now he’s in massive debt #but like?????? #he landed himself in that position and he’s TRYING to get back on his feet #i’d say he’s pretty independent idk #yeah yeah alhaitham pays for all his drinks most of the time #and he helps kaveh out a lot in other ways as well #but the point of their dynamic is that they’re mirrors to each other #you can’t really have one without the other because their stories are so intertwined and they help each other grow #they keep each other in check #luna talks #anyway #i’m very upset :)

[soldier-poet-king]

Expericing the Horrors this morning in SO many different ways.

Like. Having to acknowledge my compulsive people pleasing and the way it fuels my martyr complex, even tho mostly I simply Do Not See It and pretend it's a virtue or doesn't exist. My notions of Duty and Obligation, which are good and my only reason to keep going sometimes, are also morphing into a genuine obsession and fueling said inability to say no or even thinking I'm allowed to say no. Wrestling with the fact that sm of this is an attempt to remain in control of the situation, to keep people placated bc they can't get mad at me then, but also still living with my parents who made me like this in the first place, because that's the best financial decision for me rn. Guilt or anxiety or whatever about the fact that my coping mechanisms/thoughts could be worse but also could definitely be uh..better. ongoing frustration with work and my workplace. [Redacted] happening suddenly at work this morning, which while not impacting me directly, has definitely made all of these emotions Worse.

#franposting #u can ignore this i just needed to write it out so it wouldnt be in my brain #or would be like. less in my brain #unfortunately i have to go actually so my job #probably just gonna put on tmg and try not to freak out #its uh. oh. realizing i am not doing as well as i thought i had been. or im backsliding a lot #its like yes i am better and autonomous and independent #and yet i am 27 and people pleasing and afraid and still a desperate child wanting everyone to get along and stop being cranky #terrified of the unpredictability of it and the passive aggression #so ofc my job is to rake myself over hot coals for everyone elses comfort. bc if i do that they wont be mad and wont be mean to anyone else #if I just suck up all the badness in myself itll spare everyone else yknow #and besides. what else am i good for? yknow? like. im just me. i have to make up for my existence somehow #the rational part of myself is very small and realizes this is absolutely fucked #but yknow. what else is there. what other evidence is there that life can be different. for me at least #there is nothing new under the sun. everything stays the same. etcetcetc #ah well. theres little joys i can find in the meantime. stay sane. stay kind and good even if im turning myself into a non person

[avephelis]

Donnie self preservation skills in kevlar carapace are literally in the negatives

i mean. to be fair he's still alive, so.

#i think it'd probably not be super long after the movie aftermath so a lot of it is not wanting anyone else to get hurt again #but also we all know the absolute mess that is donnie's self-esteem. and all the krang shit plus getting played by the epf. #well it wouldn't exactly spell improvement lmfao #asks #i think a lot of this would also sort of line up with donnie approaching adulthood and feeling frustrated about independence #so sort of a coming of age thing that also ties into how disabilities can play into that <- definitely not projecting at all whaat. naurr. #kevlar carapace au

[xannerz]

roblox death noise

#vigo's pancreatitis is better now btw #he's bounced back really well and i cannot overstate my relief #but the entire ordeal and vet bill broke me #*i* haven't bounced back from it #like i've already been shouldering a lot and that made me snap lmfao #so i've just been like moseying along day to day waiting for the evening so i can go back to sleep #talking takes too much energy. so does just. yk. emoting like an average ass person lmao #i feel like terrible company. idk #cant draw cant write cant exercise can barely walk my dog #and i hate it b/c it feels like i'm fishing for excuses #ive had therapists tell me i'm very self-aware and i dont mean that in a 'i got a good grade in therapy' type of way LMAO #but in the 'if i know then i know then why am i here spinning my wheels and boohooing' type of way #like despite my own bad habits i wanna consider myself a person who has at least some hope and ambition #but i've just been super like done. lmaoo #but lately i just cant. i cannot envision a future for myself. not w/ the way things are. #these are things that *should* be independent of me but aren't. so i get roped into taking care of things. #over and over and over and over again. for over 10 years LMFAO #anyway i'm just vaguely whining no advice is being requested ty : ) #xangoeswah