#my coworkers after a week

[bambeebirdie]

I saw this one post a while back (the post) that was someone’s au idea where Dick Grayson joins the Justice League instead of Bruce. This makes everyone kind of think Batman is a myth and then one day he reveals Batman is his dad freaking everyone out. Just this idea but also make it a superbat fic so nightwing traumatizes the league by revealing Batman to be his dad and Superman traumatizes nightwing by becoming his step dad.

Essentially it’s just this

#ranking my coworkers by how much they’ve slept with my dad #flash: 10/10 has never slept with my dad #Wonder Woman: 9/10 hasn’t slept with my dad but has come close #Superman: YOU FATHER FUCKER- #or however that audio goes #nightwing grabbing the collar of Superman’s shirt a few weeks after they had to go to the batcave: DID YOU FUCK MY DAD!?!? #i just think it’s a funny idea #i will be sure to add the post that inspired this if I can find it again #dick grayson #Nightwing #dc comics #dc au #batman #Bruce Wayne #Superman #Clark Kent #wonder woman #the flash #flash #superbat

[extra-somethin-somethin]

If nothing else Koenma is a Kuwabara stan and I'm right there with him o7 (I need to write the kuwameshi fic that goes with this fr)

#maybe one day i'll write that au i have sitting in my head #ever since the comment he made about making kuwa spirit detective instead ive been thinking about it #like...what if yusuke is still recruited same as canon but like #kuwa was already spirit detective? doing assignments for the guys upstairs and all #and they made yusuke help him after his resurrection instead of going solo #and it's hilarious because they still have the ''rivalry'' set in place so it's like #now i gotta be coworkers with this guy i was in a fist fight with last week? #yusuke is like you can't be serious you want me to fight DEMONS with the guy who cant even beat ME? lmaooo okay #kuwa would be more in tune with his powers atp in this au and super offended like hello #why would i use my reiki on a FELLOW HUMAN CHILD you DICK i can hold my own on my assignments just fine #but he's actually really excited to be able to spend time with yusuke doing something besides getting his ass handed to him #they're both genkai's students (she's endlessly annoyed but they grow on her) #i just think it'd be fun cos like #it'd be harder to exclude kazuma from shit if he's literally been involved in this shit before he even met #kurama and hiei #kuwabara isn't really told about yusuke's resurrection so things go mostly the same up til he's brought back #they're both called to koenma's office and it's the spiderman pointing meme 💀 #it's koenma's first time seeing kuwa in person as he usually just sends assignments with botan #yusuke has already seen him cos of the resurrection arc #and koenma is SUCH a fanboy ''kuwabara it's such a pleasure. you know you're my best worker 🥺'' #''um urameshi am i seeing things or is that a fuckin baby'' yusuke will NOT stop laughing #it fucks koenma up so bad he makes sure he's in his adult form when he's around kuwa next #cos he wants to be the respected boss but also guy that you can chill with!! he's so cringe #okay yeah i need to write this it's such a fun concept #kuwameshi #yu yu hakusho #kuwabara kazuma #yusuke urameshi #koenma

[aurosoul]

being 30 so far is just like ‘you will go through the most cataclysmic mental anguish of your life but you actually heal from it this time. also you have hip dysplasia. go to the doctor more often.’

#incessant meowing #finding out that since cptsd disconnects u from your body u can have chronic pain and not realize it til you get better #has been one loop of many loops on the rollercoaster i am currently on #like retail jobs always made me wanna donate myself to charity from the pain of standing #and i just thought i was being weak lmaoooo #my coworkers would be like oh it’s normal to feel pain you just go numb after awhile #meanwhile my shift is spent almost in tears and then i’m sleeping 10+ hours to recover #anyways life is fucking wild. how has your week been

[moeblob]

Deacon willing to help people but doesn't recognize people so he doesn't remember what he did for who. So he just agrees and is like cool don't mention it then they mention it and he's like uhhhhhh.

However, that's other humans. He can identify the deities much easier because they have a unique glow. Like can actively tell Ymber "oh Lady Fulj just entered the city" and Ymber is like how the heck did you sense her that far away when I can't sense her that far away. It actually takes a while for Ymber to realize Deacon really doesn't know any of his coworkers and who he's talking to.

#my characters #based on me just not knowing which of my coworkers i helped with what or who asked me for what #so theyd bring something up and im like uh huh #deacon is a good bean who likes to be helpful to people around him #because hes lived a good life thanks to people around him such as #he had loving parents but after his mom died the neighbors helped him and his dad #then when his dad passed away and his neighbors would invite him over to make sure he wasnt lonely #and he appreciates those people but he doesnt recognize most of his coworkers #he can identify the neighbors based on oh the guy nearby has a hunched back and i help him with carrying stuff #so he notices those traits from people hes been near for a long time but then is baffled over coworkers #if someone changes a hair style that is a brand new person #based on holy crap my coworkers used to change their hair all the time i never knew who was who #dyed hair or getting a trim and dye or simply wearing it up one day but not the next #i have no idea who i worked with and it was v awkward for me but people were always nice #how has it been a week of pain im gonna go offline and suffer breathing pains

[angelmush]

i got a goose tattooed on the inside of my forearm today and it was a flash piece but it's my favorite tattoo already it means everything to me i could sob

#i love geese so much and so deeply i named my dog after them #goose is my black dragon dog and my loyal faithful companion and my entire world #i just love these birds #they are so misunderstood as aggressive and scary when really they just are sensitive to spatial pressure #and they need a wider diameter than humans are often willing to give #but they are so beautiful i love their long graceful necks and how i can recognize their sounds anywhere #and that no matter where i live i see their little v's in the sky #and of course wild geese by mary oliver is one of the first poems i fell in love with #my english teacher deborah read it aloud to us in high school and it made me want to go outside and to stay alive #and when my gf and i first started dating i knew i loved her for lots of reasons but one of them was that she also loved geese #she told me she had a shared folder with her family members titled “geese i've seen” that she would put her goose photos in #so her entire family could witness them with her #i remember when i was sick with anorexia a few weeks before i was hospitalized a v of canadian geese flew over me on my way into work #and these big fluffy snowflakes were falling down and i could hear them calling #and it made my eyes well up #and i hoped they would get somewhere warm enough for winter #whether or not people have respect for them is a wonderful metric for gauging somebody's character #at the grocery store i worked at when i was 18 the only coworker i grew close to had a similar affinity for geese #she had a necklace of one #a little silver glinting goose in flight :'') #personal

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

I miss my old coworkers!!! I miss having friends at work instead of passive aggressive assholes who don’t want to train me and then get annoyed when I don’t know things and act like my very existence irks them!!!!

#if this was part time I’d be able to handle it #but 9 hours a days day after day is genuinely putting me in the worst mindset I’ve had in months #like I go to my car during my break and sit there pushing tears back bc I feel alone and shunned!!! #and these are GROWN ASS WOMEN?? #one of my old coworkers came in to pick up a medication the other day and when I saw her my entire body literally slumped with relief #like omg someone I know who doesn’t hate me!!!! #and we had a quick convo bc she was updating me on work tea and I was like wow I haven’t felt this happy since i started this job #almost 2 weeks ago and that was such a sad reality check lmfao #and like the only reason I got this job is bc I’m bilingual and they desperately needed that #and it’s like okay do you realize you need me?? bc I’m there most of the week the other bilingual girl is only there twice a week #and 99% of your clients don’t speak English so what’s gonna happen if I leave?? #you’re going to have to find someone else and train THEM from the bottom just like me #you’re gonna be in the same position all over again!!! #this is all so infuriating

[ghost-proofbaby]

things i said today during my shift completely out of context that were very coffee shop blues!eddie coded:

“why don’t we just pick our least favorite ocean and destroy it instead of saving them? we have seven of them anyways.”

“i don’t know man i think the vibes of the sharks in the atlantic are off”

“the prophecy told me if i get one more lavender matcha, i get to kill myself. it’s true.”

“no”

“the guy who said ‘welcome to chili’s’ is just welcoming everyone to a different chili’s now!”

some of these are funnier with context honestly

#i don’t know what the hell i was on today but i was being extra goofy #i was making all of my coworkers laugh nonstop and this isn’t even my peak funny #this was just me losing my filter after putting my two weeks in #the first two and last one had a coworker in tears like damn okay 😭😭😭 #the third was the realest i threatened to chuck our matcha across the store #ghost talks too much (but it’s related to eddie so it’s fine) #coffee shop blues #i will find a way to include the ocean conversation into an installment with context

[songsintheattic]

we are having extremely comical and nigh catastrophic IT issues at work rn but my coworker and i have mastered tag team check printing. #girlssupportinggirls

#the short version is that her user profile is somehow broken since updating her password #so whenever she prints a check the CFO's signature isn't on it #and it's been like this for like 2 weeks and IT can't figure out how to fix it #and then i was previously printing to my other coworkers printer but some of my checks just weren't printing at all #and IT did not help me at all but after some troubleshooting it seemed to be my connection to that specific printer (women in STEM) #so i switched to printing to the other printer where i also print all my coworkers checks once she assigns the check numbers #and it's all working now but it is convoluted and stupid

[soldier-poet-king]

More updates on the whole job sitchuation this morning including a hurried whispered talk with a coworker while my boss was out for lunch and I am in some respects heartened and in other respects my worst fears about this have been validated

#the duality of fran #anyway it's like #coworker who has solid grasp and insider knowledge of situation #bc shes sort of a coworker but technically part of a different related org #anyway shes like. youd be perfect for it. asked a bunch of info about the position #passed said info on to me without prompting #suggested i get in contact with one of the ppl there who k already know #not the direct boss but another archivist i know already #without explicitly saying go for it she was like. well it's up to you. but then. gave me tons of advice #but she also basically confirmed my boss would be SOOOO pissy about it #like all the off vibes ive been picking up abt mt boss #i thought maybe they were one offs #but apparently she has quite a repuation at our office for being like that #and given convos and actions of ppl from other departments towards me lately #im uh. inclined to believe it #esp after last week's fiasco #but coworker wise sage was also like #dont not pursue an opportunity closer to what you want to be doing #just bc of the fear of this one thing #even when i expressed fear over shooting myself in the foot by earning my boss' professional emnity #she even volunteered as a reference (ive done some work with her) and just #i am going to throw UP #this is after my boss first thing this morning was like. lets get u business cards #im like. MAAM. she keeps making plans on the assumption im gonna be here forever #but better pay and opportunities elsewhere where i WANT to be #im going to. cry my eyes out #ive started skin picking in nervousness this is BAD #i guess i gotta. go email that other person to be like. hey can i drop by and can we chat sometime this week/next week #or barring that could we chat digitally but outside of normal hours when im in office bc boss is around #my ambition did this to me (but also shitty commute and cost of living ans my guilt complex)

[boxwinebaddie]

Hi Uncle Nina !!

I don't wanna clog your ask box with stupid shit but this is stupid shit but it was also my bday on the thirteenth so shjdjdjs

As a fellow Monster addict ( I got a flat of Monster for my bday and collect the cans I have 30 diff ones so far <3 ) I need to know what Stan's favourite is

And on the less stupid side of things I was also hoping to potentially hear more about Stan's trans journey/Kyle finding out Raven is trans

Also I'm sorry your job has been so stressful lately :(( I hope you have a good day 🧡

- Stan 🧡

hi orange heart stan! <3

it's so good to hear from you, baby.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHSLAY, MY LOVE! i'm sorry i'm a little late, but you know me -- everything i do is fashionably late, darling. ;)

but also!!!!! call your wonderful, lovely ask message stupid shit again!!! see what happens!!! i'm gonna frown So WIDE, i'm gonna look so Upset. i'm going to hold you up to the sun!!! JUST WATCH!!!! >;/

my sweet stannie; you are a gift, a treasure. and your ask memes are a pleasure. i don't find them stupid in any shape or form, be nice. conversely, they are extremely special to me and it's why i put off writing this message for a little while because i wanted to respond to it thoughtfully, seeing as though it's your bday message.

which, *cracks knuckles* to get the ball roooollling.

i can absolutely tell you what monster energy is stan's favorite, but as a bday bonus, bc i wasn't sure which stan you wanted to know about, or if you wanted both: i'll give you both my style's fave monster flavs

and i was going to go into some ravenstan trans lore after that, but i feel like that info should go in it's own ask, yeah? i just don't want it to get cluttered. so if you feel so inclined, would you mind sending me a second anon where i can drop that info? thank you, baby! mwah

but now, w/o further ado...

please enjoy the most Refreshing part of your day <333

for context ( and actually because i got an anon once who wanted to know whether i drink energy drinks ), i don't really know that much about energy drinks/flavors because i don't really drink energy drinks.

i mean okay, i'm not really sure if it counts as an energy drink, but i will chug a guayaki yerba mate like it is the elixir of life. ( also i fully maintain that pep stan drinks the enlightenment flavor and ravenstan drinks the raspberry one -- crunchy eco kings ) my favorite one is the passion terrere one. it's like the only one that doesn't come in a can and only comes in a glass bottle...that ice cold passion terrere mate in the glass...it hits so different than the can...oh my god. so good.

and as far as monsters go, i pretty much only drink pipeline punch bc i'm a pretty pink princess and that's what hot girls drink <3 but other than that i drink black coffee because i am an exhausted teacher girlie, but that's purely for fuel. to be honest, i rarely drink energy drinks just for fun, i only have caffeine to stay upright.

which isn't a great idea...but...i am not a role model....

speaking of:

so i told riley this story the other day, bc i needed to get her brilliant genius girl insight on energy drink flavors because she is the sugar free energy queen ( riley's answer was kyle x ultra strawberry dreams and stan x ultra mango fiesta, which, everyone say thank u riley <3 )

-- also god if you are real, bring back the watermelon lime venom you discontinued, you sick fuck, it was riley's favorite, thank you for giving us lovely orange heart stan, and fuck you very much for making ME, bitch! come on down, king! you won't! why the fuck would you extend my coworkers vacation! fight me, ugly!!!! --

and i was telling her about how i am the chaotic kenny friend, i make really bad, chaotic decisions, have no self preservation, hype and gas up my extremely bad ideas and convince myself i'm big brain, wow.

and...oof. so like 2-3 years ago during finals week, i had a fuck ton of essays and projects due ( i was a very bad student btw which is funny bc i'm a teacher ) and no idea how i was gonna do them, so i had the Brilliant Idea...to buy three Random bang energy drinks...

AND SHOTGUN ALL OF THEM BACK TO BACK LIKE BEER CANS.

ohhhhhhhhhhhh my god, party girl nina. help. crying.

and yknow, i thought this was such a good idea! i was like wow i'm gonna be so awake, i am going to b invincible.

i....was not Invicible. i was...very, very sick. i was like almost catatonic and shaking on the floor of my dorm bathroom, lmao. i had to have my roomate take a picture of me on the floor and text all my teachers what happened, which, thank god they were all really nice and laughed but...i feel like that tells you everything you need to know about me...people who think i'm their hero...i am a fucking idiot.

but!! BUUUUTTT! just for You, baby. i deep dived a lot of forums and read a lot about the flavor profiles and think...i made a pretty accurate assertion of what my kid's energy drink preferences are <3

me: paris hilton pipeline punch bc i am bad as hell ;)

stan the man with the plan: okay, so i think that pep stan is definitely that ultra paradise monster energy. it just seems really crisp, clean, earthy. stan also doesn't really care for sweets or sugar, so it makes sense to me that he would be drinking a zero sugar monster ( kyle is disgusted ) idk the kiwi, lime, cucumber flavor profile just feels like pep stan. please tell me you can see the vision, help.

kyle pile: hmmm...so what i've concluded with my research is that kyle pile probably likes that pacific pipeline monster that seems to taste like fruit punch <3 it has to be the full sugar ones because of his blood sugar and stan does kind of scold kyle for drinking them bc he's not really supposed to and he gets really cracked out ahdslkshd like he's really cute but stan is like oh my god bro you gotta lay down but yeah i think that one or the orange dreamsicle one, which is hilarious because the only foods stmwtp canonically does not like are pickles and artifical orange flavoring...he really loves kp.

raven: soooooo i know that i said pep stan was the mango loco monster energy, BUT RAVENSTAN IS LITERALLY THE MANGO LOCO MONSTER ENERGY LIKE HELLO??? also i feel like he is like those mexican dads that put a little tajin in whatever they're eating and act like they've invented fire heeeeeelp ravenstan is so the dad that cuts u up fruit into little shapes and pus tajin on them and feeds u them when ur sad <333 luv u raven ;-; <3 but yeah i feel like he full on turns it into a raspado its so unserious sometimes theres a shot in there, it's usually the spicy tamarind smirnoff vodka,

...what can i say my man is a visionary and i see it

jersey: oooookaaaaay. so...sigh. for Obvious Reasons, pre and during rm, because of kyle's ed, he only drinks the sugar free monsters. for energy because he's exhausted ( my baby </3 ) but i also do think he thinks they taste good. i think he fucks with that ultra watermelon flavor that just tastes like the most beautiful, delectable, mouth watering liquid watermelon candy ever. i also think he could rock with the strawberry or the peach one sounds dank.

if the watermelon one isn't there it does stress him out, but he has a mental list of what one is next on the tier list, and acts accordingly. its kind of a nice change of pace but...his brain does not think that. however, when kyle is healing, weirdly enough, i think he ACTUALLY LIKES???? those coffee flavored ones??? which is Insane and everyone including tweek points and laughs at him

i hope...that suffices? you're totally welcome to offer me what you think is the right answer: you're the monster expert, after all. but this is what i feel in my heart! i think it feels accurate but, lmk! :')

and also...speaking of my job. UUUUUUGH. thank you baby. :((( i am actually criminally depressed because my fucking HOE-WORKER fucking extended his vacation ONE MORE WEEK! so i have to cover all his shifts for an extra week while he's on vacation. so that means i don't get to watch my testing accommodation kids who i miss very much, i still don't get his kinder reccess shift and literally??? spring break is next week like he couldn't WAIT???? holy fuck i'm Sad. :(

but i will be fine darling. but it's actually why i wanted to see if you could send me another anon so i can use that anon to talk about trans stan journey stuff? i just don't want it to get lost in this post and also, i'm not in great spirits rn and don't want to answer it until i can write something that's not flaming garbage.

but happy late birthday baby, i'm so glad you were born. <333

-uncle nina, monster shot gun queen

p.s. what is your favorite monster energy? :)

#BB IF YOU CALL YOUR MESSAGE STUPID ONE MORE TIME #I AM GOING TO PUT YOU IN SO MANY BLANKETS AND FEED YOU SO MANY SNACKS AND BRAID UR HAIR #KNOCK IT AWHFF!!!!!! #you are so loved and this was no stupid at all and i actually had a lot of fun reading all about all the monster flavors #i'm sorry if its not totally accurate i did my best #i'm sorry the green one is so much more pep stan #and the mango loco one is actually raven #like thats just the right answer #ravenstan drinking the mango loco monster w the tajin rim...like he's kind of a genius oh my god #him turning them into a cursed mixed drink is foul tho i just know his head hurts after that #i cant believe i had jersey likes the coffee ones that is so foul #but him drinking the no sugar ones and drinking the candy flavored ones bc he is like 7 years old #theyre so cute lkahdkshd also kyle pile also likes the cherry blade lemonade bang energy that feels right to me #BUT YEAH I HOPE THIS MADE YOU SMILE #TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK HAHA #also sorry i didnt give you the Serious answer in that post but ravens trans journey is really important to me #and i really want to honor that and not rush it or write it when i am in a bad mood...ill make it worth it for you my love #but uuuugh no im in such a bad mood like im actually so frustrated like this is just not fair to me #me n the older kids are starting to kind of be alright but it kind of ebbs and flows like its better somedays and worse others #but they are stuck with just me for another week so were managing tbh my coworker was dad and im mom basically #im more like stepmom and they dont really like me bc ur not my real mom but like at least im nice lmao #but yeah happy birthday baby hope you enjoyed this and i will get you the answers you seek very soon mWAAAAH #also not me shotgunning 3 bang energies and throwing up and having to have my friends email my professors #when i tell you im not a role model i mean that i am a joke i make such bad decisions #live fast die young bad girls do it well

[mellotronmkll]

Okay I lived and I'm normal now

#I had fun I feel optimistic about my future rn. I'm actually just literally going to be fine. #People like me I can make friends I can reconnect with old ones I can reach out more it can all happen for me. It will be okay #I love this friend so much she is such a ray of sunshine I always feel like this after we hang out it's just like she is such a positive #Force in my life........😭💖 I'm so grateful even if she's one of my only friends right now it's okay...cos she really does like me #And today she encouraged me to reach out to one of our old coworkers I used to get along well with out of nowhere and I was like #Okay you're actually so right. And you just saved my life possibly. #That's gonna be my goal for this week

[ahaura]

^_^ HIIIIIIIIIIIIII

#hvaña #IM SO HAPPYYYYYYYYYYY i still cant believe they passed me. AND i had a couple points above bare minimum! #my dad is so excited to add me to the auto insurance lmao<3 #and now NOW i can finally relax and get back into reading and stuff!!!! i kept my to-do-after-passing list in my drafts so i can do all ofi #my dad took my picture and then texted all his coworkers T_T #some of them have known me since before i was born so i was like. ok iguess u can send them a pic of me. i guEsS. #also crazy how it worked out... like i'll writ eit down to take to therapy in a couple-ish weeks #ANYWHO!!! thank u to everyone who sent love and believed in me I LOVE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

[starlit-hopes-and-dreams]

I get to come hoooooome 😭🥳

#that going into the office every fucking day for over a month was roughhhhh man #especially after wfh for the last *checks year #almost 4 years #im not conditioned to all those people anymore #or those lights #or those sounds #while new boss and the coworker i trained with are pretty cool #and hella entertaining lol #these last weeks have still been literal hell and im so fucking happy to be back home #now i just need to buy a second monitor since this job didn't give me one #rude XD #i can't stand working from one monitor and my laptop its pretty awful #oh well #im home babyyyy #:D #starlit thoughts

[gobbluthbutagirl]

actually so funny in retrospect how on the last wednesday of 2022 my job told me i had an “attitude problem” so in 2023 i quit that job, bought a pair of socks online that said “i ❤️ my attitude problem,” and listened to “bad attitude” by meat loaf so many times that it became my #3 most played song of the year

#the attitude problem was literally not even in the room with us if you know what i mean. #literal examples she gave were ‘you talk to your coworkers in the break room about stuff that happened on a shift they didn’t work’ #and ‘you ask me too many questions about the job and it makes me uncomfortable’ #this after i’d been working there 16 months. clocked in 5 minutes early every single day. #had called out sick 3 times ever at that point and all because i was actually sick. all times i was sick for like a week #and still only called out one day. #spent 6 months closing registers every night while on the schedule as the cleaner. #once spent over an hour of my one precious life cleaning the dirtiest and nastiest cart of all time #because we had so few because they kept getting stolen. #went above and beyond every single day and was consistently rated ‘exceeds expectations’ on performance reviews. #and they had given me a 15-cent performance raise after telling me i was the best cleaner of all time. #and then they raised the starting wage to $17.25 and my 15-cent raise was nullified so in the end it didn’t even matter. #and i was paying $1425 a month for a no oven shithole with thin walls and insane neighbors #AND THEY REALLY THOUGHT I’D RATHER BE PROMOTED THERE THAN JUST QUIT AND KEEP THE ATTITUDE!!!

[obstinaterixatrix]

three block rule. so I’m inheriting an intern from someone who left my work and what I’m seeing doesn’t really… speak well to that former coworker because this intern has to like. redo two months of work. like two whole months. how do you let it get that bad. and I got along well enough with that coworker but upon reflection she did have a pretty loosey-goosey attitude so I can see her going like ‘oh you finished your work? you feel good about it? bet.’ no bet get back here and actually review what the intern is doing

#my ramblings #last week I spent like. I dunno two or three hours putting together clear and specific instructions for necessary revisions #and also making so many tutorials so I can be like ‘hey intern. read this first and then ask me questions.’ #and I feel bad for the intern too bc thats A Lot Of Work #but also #when I’m talking to the intern she’s like ‘I am so confident about my work’ #and when I look at her work it is straight up missing #maybe you need to be a little less confident. #sigh. trying to give her a fair shot while cleaning up after the mess former coworker left me with while also trying not to go overboard