#osdd type 1

[0809sysblings]

idk why I'm posting this here but it's fine because I can do whatever I want. sorry I think I'm having an enneagram type 1 moment. it's not mental illness, it's because of my enneagram type! can't help being a Gemini Enneagram Type 1

also I keep using the amulet's powers so I've been being hit with the after effects. such power deranges a man /ref

#milgran't #type 1 momence #btw as a prefacw this is not directed at anyone here. this is just. a thing. that is everywhere. #ok. anyway. #the....... Exotification of DID/OSDD-1... is always so annoying. #and like. i get it. i understand. its probably a difficult thing for many ppl to actually comprehend as a real human experience #which brings me to the main point of this Pussy-Rant (ranting in tags bc im a pussy) #i think. the main reasom its So Exotified. is. '''''''MPD'''''''' #serioisky that name has done. so much fucking damage its insane. absolute wack shit #anyway yeah. like. the concept of it being Multiple People In One Body/Brain... when like... that's.. not really whats going on.. #like if youre a system and that's how you understand your system to be. then power to you. i dont care do literally whatever #its just. i think CDDs would be a LOT easier for people to understand if-- #--it was not looked at as the Multiple People Disorder. but instead as the Fucking Extreme Compartmentalization Disorder #idk its just annoying seein ppl (who are probably very well meaning!) talk about the disorder i experience as if its bizarre and fantastical #~look wooooowwww this is something that can happen to the brain due to The Most Unreal And Most Traumatic Events!! crazy right?~ #i am going to get the Evil Alter out here so he can beat you to death. #like yeah its fucking. sad and fucked up what has to happen to develop a CDD. and that should be acknowledged. #and many systems Have had to go through experiences that a lot of ppl can only fathom as being able to happen in fiction. #but.... its just so isolating and makes me feel Capital C Crazy 🥴 #dear lord ive just been so irritable and frustrated lately... obligatory apologies. #ah. i think i suddenly figured out why this in particular triggers me so much. #god damn it it's always the fucking trauma huh! #<- spent basically all of elementary school and middle school feeling like there was a giant sign over my head that said-- #--''this poor soul went through something so tragic! how awful to think that something that serious could happen to just a little kid!'' #its the ''hey can you stop treating me as something helpless that needs to be fixed and just treat me like A Fucking Person'' feelings #but see this disorder is just so beautiful because in a week i may be wanting ppl to see me as a suffering freak who needs to be fixed #or hell even fucking tomorrow. who knows not me #.. ok im actually genuinely afraid talkimg about this is going to lead to her gettinf triggered out KDJSNKDJSNJD so im gonna. stop.

[cctinsleykin]

My therapist at my first meeting: "I don't think you have ADHD."

My therapist upon realizing I meet criteria for Bipolar Disorder type 1: *frantically looking through the dsm-v and printing out tests* "I think you have ADHD."

I think I need a new therapist :D

#For those of you who don't know #bipolar disorder type 1 and ADHD have symptom overlap and are often comorbid #meaning that they're often diagnosed together #i meet criteria for both #and for PTSD and OSDD #she genuinely told me that she would rather it was PTSD than Bipolar #like... ma'am #that's ableist #and we don't get to choose what's going on in my funky noggin #x text #ableist therapist #ableism #bipolar disorder #bipolar disorder type 1 #ADHD #therapy

[lesenbyan]

The problem with trying to self dx whatever dissociative Issue I have is that like. I was raised by a system. DID and symptoms thereof are normalized to me (which is why it's taken me so long to realize this is actually like. An Issue not just a quirk) I literally can look at symptoms and not know if I have said symptom bc like. Is that me? Is it something I learned from my mom? Is it intrusive thought? Is my non-existence intrusive thought or depersonalization/derealization? I sure don't fucking know

#personal; #self dx woes; #like i was looking up osdd and saw the definition for type 1 and just 'this feels right but doesn't sound right but thay gets me no closer' #and dperson/drealize is something i've looked up before and i still just. can't tell #all i know is i only exist when being interacted with & for all i have a physical effect on the world i literally Cannot believe #that i do/would/will/have/had an emotional effect on like. literally anyone. #anyway feel free to reply if you have any input on the subject ig

[kafus]

i wont feel offended if you ignore this ask btw, i get that its asking something kind of personal! but can i ask what you mean by the internet treating DID as magical?

hi i actually enjoy DID questions don't worry LOL and i'm in the mood rn

when most people think about DID they are usually thinking about very overt cases with very distinct alters with vastly different personalities, different names, gender identities, etc. while this is a popular angle to imagine DID, overt cases like that are actually a pretty small percentage of what DID tends to look like. (of course, social media can push people's presentation to become more overt, which isn't fake/bad or anything, humans are social animals and the way we interact with each other can affect even our mental illnesses. additionally some people will become more overt after receiving therapy while they start communicating with alters for the first time. but my point is DID is not usually that strikingly obvious)

this popular perception also leaves out a lot of the rest of DID which falls in line with what people consider more "typical" disorders, PTSD symptoms galore, dissociation/dissociative amnesia, somatic pains and illness, comorbid conditions and physical disabilities. i think if people had more of an understanding of the non-alter parts of DID, it would ground the disorder a lot more and make it a lot less "magical" seeming.

but overall it all comes back to like... people not understanding that DID is just an extension of PTSD and other parts-based disorders. the same psychological process that makes PTSD/C-PTSD happen, BPD, etc, is what causes DID, it's just pushed to a far extreme due to when the trauma is experienced (very early childhood) and other factors surrounding that trauma, such as the length of time the trauma occurred over, or whether or not the child had stable caregivers and/or relief from traumatic events. DID is not some sort of completely separate category of mental illness - alters (the DID definition of them) may be unique to DID, but they come from the same place a ton of other mental illnesses do and there's a ton of overlapping symptoms between DID and pretty much every disorder caused by trauma.

i often see people act like DID is some far off life experience they couldn't even fathom or imagine living with, but if anyone just actually explained this shit properly i'm pretty sure most people, especially traumatized people, would go "oh that makes sense" and not feel so estranged from it lol. it's really frustrating because people continuing to see DID as this sort of magical, far-off experience, takes the disability/disorder out of it in conversation about it (people can only ever seem to talk about alters) and it also usually ends up spreading misinformation at the same time. there's sooo much bullshit about DID out there. good grief. it even hurts other people with trauma-based conditions that aren't DID

edit: wait also btw OSDD-1 is included in this conversation, i'm just using DID as shorthand instead of typing DID/OSDD every time and i am personally diagnosed with DID so lol

#kiki was here #asks #anonymous #by the way this isn't exclusive to singlets or whatever #other people w DID can be just as misinformed #or have lack of understanding of why their disorder is the way it is #lived experience alone is not education #i have been there before lol

[apollortaylor]

So these tags were on my post about amnesia. And I want to address it. Short answer, no you do not. You need blackout amnesia (assuming that’s what you meant by full amnesia) in order to have DID.

DID is not the only way to have a system, OSDD 1-b has very little or no amnesia and still has alters, so does p-DID.

Though I do want to differentiate between the different types of amnesia.

Emotional amnesia: where you don’t remember any emotions that you were feeling during the event.

Greyouts: when you remember what happened but have no memories of it, as if someone told you about the event but you weren’t there.

Blackouts: when you don’t remember anything about what happened, and you often don’t remember that you missed something.

I’d also like to mention that amnesia often doesn’t happen in the moment, often the memory will fade over a short period of time until they’re gone. At least that’s what I experience.

Anyways, here you are @sprites-your-cal

Hope this helped

-Apollo

#traumagenic system #did osdd #did system #endos dni #osddid

[hvrbinqer]

System templates for you to use for free! I hope this helps the community of systems out there.

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• 𝐅𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐋 •

( • ω •)

/ > ཻུ۪۪͎ ⃟ 𖣠ᮬ·̣̇꧈ 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞, 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲

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EXTRA ; Please note that all of these are FREE TO USE! Creds are appreciated but not necessary.

𝐡𝐯𝐫𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐪𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

#𝑐𝑟𝑢𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑑 𝑛𝑜𝑡𝑒𝑠．ᝰ #did #osdd #osdddid #did support #system intro #system #templates #template ideas

[multiplicity-positivity]

Info and Resources for Questioning Systems

Our old post with resources is out of date and doesn’t have that much information, so we’ve decided to put this together! Please let us know if we should make any corrections or if you have resource ideas you’d like us to add to this post.

NOTE: Before we get started, it’s so important to mention that every system should rule out trauma first before considering other origins. This is because complex dissociative disorders can present in covert ways, and function by hiding trauma from some alters. Even if you’re certain you’re not traumatized, please research and understand complex dissociative disorders before learning about other origin types. It’s possible to not remember or misunderstand trauma. Ruling it out first will save you a lot of difficulty and heartache in the future!

NOTE 2: As a system, we understand the terms “tulpa” and “tulpamancy” are cultural appropriation, and believe that as a community a different term for these systems should be selected. However, until that happens, we will continue to link handy resources for these sorts of systems.

Now, onto the resources!

This is not a complete list! If there’s any resource you’ve found useful and would like us to add, please get in touch!

Websites:

CDD (DID and OSDD-1) Specific:

Beauty after Bruises, and especially their article on myths and misconceptions about DID

Multiplied by One, a DID nonprofit that has a wealth of resources on dissociative disorders and CPTSD (and offering support for those in need!)

First Person Plural, another great nonprofit

ISSTD’s public resources

The Cleveland Clinic’s page on DID

Survivors’ Network (not to be confused with the Survivors’ Network Discord) page on DID

The National Alliance on Mental Illness’ info on dissociative disorders

DIS-SOS, a blog with tons of info on trauma, dissociation, and living with both

osdd.one, a site with information on complex dissociative disorders with a focus on OSDD-1

NAMI Michigan’s DID fact sheet

The Healthy Place’s blog on Dissociative Living

Non-CDD Specific:

What is Plurality/Multiplicity? by YoppVoice

More than One

Tulpa.io, Tulpanomicon, and Tulpa.info, all sites where tulpas, thoughtforms, willomates, and their creators can share their experiences

The Daemon Page

Daemonism 101

Manchester Metropolitan University’s Understanding Multiplicity

Plurality-Resources (traumagenic, not CDD, specific)

The Plurality Playbook, a resource for plurality in the workplace (for employees and managers)

Endogenic Hub

The Dissociative Initiative includes resources for both CDD systems and others who experience multiplicity

Soulbonding Info Carrd

Pluralpedia, a plurality wiki created and maintained by systems for systems

Podcasts:

The System Speak Podcast

The Bag System Podcast

Tumblr Blogs:

@pluraldeepdive

@system-society

@dear-systems

@plural-culture-is

@subsystems

@plurals-helping-plurals

YouTubers:

Pink Sugar Fairies

The Alexandrite System

FragmentDID

The Rings System

The CTAD Clinic

(psst! if you’re an endogenic/not-trauma formed system YouTuber, please let us know! we’d love to check out your videos and add your channel to this list!)

Other:

This Google Drive folder has 13 books on mental health, with a focus on dissociative disorders and trauma.

This Google Drive folder also has a bunch of great resources (keep in mind there are some repeats in both drives)

UTEP’s Mental Health Awareness Training infographic on dissociative disorders

Our own posts on Understanding DID, Establishing Contact with Headmates, Dissociative Amnesia, and Depersonalization vs. Derealization

Seeking help through therapy:

(specifically specialists in dissociative disorders)

Psychology Today’s search page for finding therapists who specialize in dissociative disorders

Carolyn Spring’s article, How to find a therapist for a dissociative disorder

The ISSTD’s Find a Therapist page

Websites we do NOT recommend can be found here! Note: some of the resources we’ve linked here have their own links to websites we don’t recommend. Please use your best judgement when visiting sites, and understand that we as a system DO NOT endorse the sites listed in the link above, even if we’ve included resources that link to those sites.

We hope y’all are able to find some of this useful! Again, please let us know if you have any resources you’d like us to add to this list. Thanks so much, everyone!

#multiplicity #pluralgang #plurality #actuallyplural #endogenic #traumagenic #plural resources #system resources #dissociative identity disorder #did osdd #osdd did #long post #questioning system #trauma mention #abuse mention

[pluralpcs]

So You're a Singlet and Want to Play a Plural PC?

We see this come up from time to time. A singlet wants to play a character with "multiple personalities" or something like that.

We think that's really cool! The advice and information on this blog is free for anyone to use to have fun!

But there's likely a few things to consider if you're singular and are trying to play a plural character.

For the Edge!

We are not fans of considering things "cringe". We definitely cause people to cringe at our self expression. Hell, this entire sideblog could wind up on a cringe subreddit some day. So we are not against making "edgy" characters.

But we do have to admit that there are players out there who make characters for what seem to be the sole reason of being edgy. And that in and of itself isn't wrong or bad (we have some real edgelords in our character portfolio). It just happens to be the case that sometimes these players won't mesh well with the rest of their table, or they might stray into the territory of mockery.

Dissociative Identity Disorder and Otherwise Specified Dissociative Disorder type 1 (or Multiple Personality Disorder if you're getting old school with your language) are stigmatized disorders, which in turn means that there will be players that slap them onto their characters to make the character more tragic, serious, or otherwise edgy. These aren't the only ways to be plural, or for plural characters to exist, but they are probably the most popular depictions.

So it might be tempting to just give a character an edgy alternate personality state. But it's important to not make a caricature. Just like you shouldn't make stereotypes of other identities and disorders, you should be kind with your plural ones. Don't rely on stereotypes or negative media depictions. Consider the fact that DID and OSDD-1 are common enough that you have probably met people with those disorders. Yes it's an extreme disorder for some of us, but for others it's just kinda, part of our lives (and for many it's somewhere in between).

Do Some Research

Simple as. This follows from avoiding stereotypes and caricatures. Look up other plural blogs. Read some threads on r/plurals. Listen to plural folk about our experiences. Hell, if you know some systems maybe talk to them about the idea for a character. Keep an open mind. Be willing to change your concepts about your character and plurality around.

Be a Few Team Players

A lot of advice for working with a group of other players will likely apply well to your plural character. It sucks ass to have that one character that's always trying to roll to pick pocket the other PCs. It still sucks when that character is a headmate of a plural PC. Keep in mind that you're playing a game with a group of other people, even if your playing a group of people sharing a body.

Our best advice for playing plural characters is the same as our general advice to other real life plurals: to think of the collective as being an internal team. Try to make sure that the different headmates of your PC are not at each others' throats constantly. When one headmate makes a promise to another PC, the other headmates should take responsibility with keeping that promise. If your plural PC is adventuring with a group of other PCs, then all of the headmates should be to some extent on board with this.

Of course, this advice can always be broken when it's worth it to the group and the story. Just like it can be fun and narratively appropriate for two PCs to get into a fight with each other, it can be fun and narratively appropriate for two headmates to come into conflict.

Something Special

There's something to be said about wanting to be special. People want to be special. And when they make characters, they want those characters to be special. And oftentimes those things are thrown at people as an accusation to grind them down and make them shut up. But everyone's special. Everyone has a whole ass life that they've lived that has uniqueness and commonality to it.

This is true of PCs as well. If you make a plural character, you're making a character that's special. And so are your singular PCs. It's likely the assumption that your character is singular, so it feels special or rare to make one that's explicitly plural. But all of the characters at your table are in some way special or rare. That's true by virtue of the fact that they're the characters your story and game focuses on.

So if you're playing a plural character, remember that while they are special, they are no more special than the rest of the PCs at the table. Share the spotlight. Engage with each other. Invest in everyone's story. Lift each other up.

#ttrpg #tabletop rpgs #roleplaying games #endo safe #plurality #plural system #system stuff

[borderlinedolly]

Questions For Systems

1. What's your system name?

2. What's your collective name?

3. What are your collective pronouns?

4. How old are you bodily?

5. What type of system are you? (E.G. OSDD-1, DID, etc)

6. What's your (approximate) headcount?

7. How did you find out you're a system?

8. How many of you were there upon discovery?

9. Do you have an innerworld? If so, what type? (E.G. small, medium, large, magical, infinite, etc)

10. Do you have a fronting room? If so, what does it look like?

11. Who's the oldest?

12. Who's the youngest?

13. Who's most likely to cause mischief?

14. Who's the system's parental figure?

15. Who's the baby of the system?

16. Who's the one that everyone gets along with?

#complex dissociative identity disorder #dissociative identity disorder #did system #other specified dissociative disorder #alters #complex did #hc did #did community #highly complex dissociative identity disorder #highly complex did #osdd 1a #osdd 1b #osdd system #osdd 1 #osdd #osddid #osdd did #did osdd #did alter #hc did system #udd #unspecified dissociative disorder #udd system

[hauntedselves]

Braun's BASK (Behaviour, Affect, Sensation & Knowledge) model of the continuum of dissociation, starting with normal levels (e.g. hypnosis and doing things on autopilot), to a dissociative episode (e.g. spiritual trance) to a dissociative disorder (e.g. DP/DR), to PTSD, to 'atypical' dissociative disorder (or OSDD in today's language), to atypical MPD (or OSDD-1 & P-DID), to MPD (DID, including polyfragmented DID).

He also includes physical disorders which include dissociation, such as some types of epilepsy and TBIs.

This paper was written in 1988.

- From Braun, Bennett G., 'The BASK Model of Dissociation', Dissociation vol. 1, issue 1, 1988.

#dogpost #described in alt text #described #dissociative identity disorder #dissociation #bask model #interesting paper but very convoluted charts lol #ptsd ± cptsd ± bpd ± osdd ± did

[seillean-sys]

Image 1 ID: a screenshot of a tumblr post, it is a bulleted list titled “DSM DID,” and the list is as follows: Two or more distinct personality states that can, and do, take control (switch); Alternation between distinct personality states is not always associated with amnesia, though it's usually and typically present at some point during the course of the disorder (ie, for childhood events), but not always (the weight of the amnesia criteria will depend on where you're being diagnosed-- Europe and the US evaluate the amnesia differently). For the most part, amnesia of some kind is required, though memories can be found and a diagnosis of DID will remain; Intrusion, or non possessive form, is common, in addition to switching; There isn't a dominant personality. End image 1 ID.

Image 2 ID: a screenshot of the same post now listing “DSM OSDD1-A,” reading: Indistinct alters; Mainly presents as intrusions; Switching is not common. There may be occasional, limited and transient episodes in which an indistinct personality state assumes executive control to engage in circumscribed behaviours (e.g., in response to extreme emotional states or during episodes of self-harm or the reenactment of traumatic memories); Amnesia is extremely common for periods of both intrusion and during the infrequent switching (functionally, it's required); Dominant personality. End image 2 ID.

Image 3 ID: A list titled “DSM OSDD1-b,” reading: Two or more distinct personality states that can, and do, take control (switch); Dissociation from emotion is the only type of amnesia experienced ("emotional amnesia", which is a dumb term and I hate it); There is no dominant personality, though it's fairly common for switching to happen infrequently; Intrusion is also common. End final image ID.

In the interest of transparency because that post is very long heres the parts I’m going to be addressing, and because I don’t want to vague anyone this is @sysmedsaresexist’s post. I am not trying to be rude and will endeavor to remain respectful throughout this post.

Otherwise specified dissociative disorder has 4 subtypes in the DSM. The only one that officially entails alters is OSDD type 1 (though there is discussion to be had about type 2 and the circumstances under which the identity disturbances happen, but that’s for another post). The DSM V does not list specific traits or symptoms as diagnostic criteria for any particular OSDD subtype, and this is because OSDD as a whole is diagnosed when someone presents with some, but not the required number, of the symptoms of other dissociative disorders. In the case of type one, the disorder that a given person is meeting some of the requirements for is dissociative identity disorder. The description of OSDD-1, verbatim, is “Chronic and recurrent syndromes of mixed dissociative symptoms: This category includes identity disturbance associated with less-than-marked discontinuities in sense of self and agency, or alterations of identity or episodes of possession in an individual who reports no dissociative amnesia” (APA 2013, 300.15). That’s it. The very next sentence discusses OSDD-2 in about the same amount of text. There are no listed attributes of any subtype of OSDD, so listing common characteristics and prefacing them with “DSM OSDD-1a/b” is not only disingenuous, it’s incorrect. Which leads into my next point.

The separation between 1a and 1b in terms of OSDD-1 is entirely community based. I am not saying that’s a bad thing; it’s important for people to find others with similar experiences and I don’t deny that pwOSDD-1 who identify themselves as 1a have far less community online than those with 1b. That being said, if I and a person with 1a each went to the same therapist, presented our symptoms, and received a diagnosis, both would read OSDD type 1 (or, more likely: other specified dissociative disorder, Chronic and recurrent syndromes of mixed dissociative symptoms). Same disorder, different presentations.

In addition to the listing of symptoms being disingenuous, the nature of the symptoms listed is as well; switching is not mentioned in the page of OSDD. Not once. Perhaps op is noting trends, which fair enough, and I would generally agree with said trends (though of course there are exceptions). However, they are not designated symptoms of OSDD type 1 because the symptoms are already previously listed under the dissociative identity disorder page. Other specified diagnoses are given for most every category in the DSM-V: Other specified feeding and eating disorder; other specified somatic symptom and related disorder; other specified ADHD, tic disorder, neurodevelopmental disorder, anxiety disorder, truly almost every categorization of disorders has an other specified and/or unspecified diagnosis.

My last sort of gripe with this post is the disdain for the phrase “emotional amnesia.” I find that that phrase is quite accurate to the experience of objectively remembering an event, but experiencing the emotions as if they happened to someone else. What phrase might you propose instead? /gq

#osdd #osdd alter #osdd system #osdd community #did osdd #did #did alter #actually did #actually dissociative #caí.txt #syscourse

[sysboxes]

not a request but a question, we saw you had the epileptic user boxes, and we wanted to know if you had a toureettes userbox? we never saw one and didn't know if we overlooked it.

we would also like to see other disability userboxes you all have done if it's okay to ask you to show them off? /nf

-🌟

ok I- ran out of spoons 😭😭 but here is a bunch

I tried to semi organize them

-mod weeping ❤️

This user has BPD, OCD, and tourettes.

This user has BPD, OCD, ASD, Tourettes, and is chronically ill.

This user has OSDD, ADHD, ASD, BPD, Tourette's, possibly dyslexia, anxiety, and a sleep disorder.

This system is autistic and has ADHD.

This user has BPD, ASPD, NPD, ADHD, ASD, Schizophrenia, APD, and OSDD.

This system has ADHD, autism, and possible personality disorders.

this system is influenced by being autistic and having adhd and many phobias.

This user has DID, NPD, BPD, ASD, and ADHD.

This system has BPD, polyfragmented DID, and autism.

This user is an autistic system who splits easily, and has a high alter count with a lot of fictives.

This system splits fictives easily due to being autistic.

this system frequently splits alters from their special interests and hyperfixations

this users special interest heavily impacts their system

This system has DID, autism, manic depression, and anxiety.

this user is autistic but their special interests have barely influenced their system.

this system is autistic and has ADHD.

This autistic system needs allistics to stop speaking on autistic issues.

this system has introjects from their childhood special interests

this system is very protective of their special interest

this system has a hard time hearing bad things about their special interest

this users special interest is their source

Multiple POTS userboxes.

This system has overlapping chronic mental illnesses.

This system has a lot of mental illness holders.

This system can’t feel pain and is willing to bite.

This system has introjects who hold pain and symptoms.

This user is a Tweek Tweak fictive so they may twitch sometimes.

This alter tics a lot while fronting.

frequent fronters depend on the systems current hyperfixation

this system constantly reblogs things related to their hyperfixations and interests

This user has a hard time telling introjects from kins from delusional attachments

This alter is an ADHD symptom holder.

This user has ADHD.

This user is an autism symptom holder

This alter is an autism symptom holder

This system is autistic.

This system is type 1 diabetic

this system is epileptic / this system is a left temporal lobe epileptic / the system is a right temporal lobe epileptic

this user has insomnia

This system has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.

This system struggles with chronic fatigue.

This alter struggles with chronic fatigue.

This system struggles with chronic panic.

This alter struggles with chronic pain.

This alter struggles with chronic pain and chronic fatigue.

This system struggles with chronic pain and chronic fatigue.

This system has chronic pain and it causes them to split. / This system has chronic pain and it causes them to split. Please be patient.

This system struggles with chronic pain.

This system is chronically ill.

This system is physically disabled.

This system has a disability.

This system is disabled.

This system has an unspecified disability.

This system is a walker user. / This system uses a walker

This system is an electric scooter user. / This system uses an electric scooter.

This system is a wheelchair user. / This system uses a wheelchair.

This system uses a cane. / This system is a cane user.

This system uses a rollator. / This system is a rollator user.

This system uses a powerchair. / This system is a powerchair user.

This system has alters who need mobility aids always, sometimes, and not at all. Please ask first.

This users ability to speak fluctuates.

This alter cannot speak or type.

This user is semi verbal. / This system is semi verbal.

This user is nonverbal and upset they don’t know BSL.

This user is nonverbal and upset they don’t know ASL.

This system has difficulty talking and is doing their best to talk to people

This system struggles with hearing. Please be gentle.

This system has a hard time masking.

This system is having a hard time again.

This user is sick.

This system is quick to cry and feels a lot of emotions.

This system is tired in a way sleep can’t fix.

This system struggles with empathy, sympathy, and compassion.

This system is on the struggle bus

This system struggles to remember things and apologizes in advance

this user struggles with severe paranoia, please do not vaguepost around them

this system needs tone tags

Please be patient with this system, they’re struggling with a lot of their symptoms.

This system is easily scared

#mod weeping ❤️ #the bottom are miscellaneous ones

[syscourse-confessions]

What Psychiatry actually says: Most evidence we have points towards that DID and OSDD-1 are likely caused by early childhood trauma the majority of the time - however there are some exceptions where either trauma happened later or trauma history could not be identified. There are also people who demonstrate extremely similar symptoms, but that seem to be caused by cultural and spiritual practices rather than trauma, so these people should not be diagnosed. We still have a lot to learn about both these disorders and similar phenomenon, so we can't make any sweeping conclusions about how it develops and why.

What anti-endos say: Well actually, science says that it's literally physically impossible for systems to form any other way except for this specific type of trauma, so if you experience anything otherwise you're wrong and you're personally attacking me!

.

#syscourse #syscourse confessions

[cambriancrew]

@mandellaeffect

So. It's been several days since this, but we still want to reply. We wrote out a long thing, Tumblr ate it, we rewrote it by hand, and we're just now getting around to typing it up.

And fair warning. We can't talk in depth about this interview and why we said what we said without also talking about the abuse we experienced from our ex. We'll keep it general and nonspecific as much as possible, but please just know, it was REALLY bad. Much worse than what we talk about here. Like we still have PTSD from it bad.

Also it may help to read the AMA we did on Reddit after this interview came out.

So. Our ex believed we either had DID or were demon possessed, and had very ableist views about DID that he used to threaten us with - believed we were dangerous to be around, for instance - and threatened us with involuntarily commitment. He also tried to prevent us from seeing any therapist or mental health care provider other than the extremely bigoted, very out of date pastor/counselor of the church we went to and that our husband worked at.

We worried that he was right, that we might fit the criteria for OSDD-1 because of our failing relationship with him.

But, in all honesty, our relationship had been falling apart for awhile, because he was abusive - obsessed with being the perfect fundamentalist Christian couple, bigotry and all. He tried to make us Crew stop being friends with people who weren't Christians, and people who were queer. He tried to dictate what books we could read - no more science fiction and fantasy even though that's the genre we write and even wrote together with him, or psychiatry books even though we worked in a geri-psych nursing home and what we read was relevant. Tried to dictate what we watched on TV and what games we could play - even though he was a huge Star Wars fan and that has huge Buddhist underpinnings, and played Dungeons and Dragons online a lot which he made us swear never to tell anyone because they might think it was demonic - hypocrite much?

He even got upset that we were talking to people about the issues we were having - he called it "emotionally cheating", regardless of the fact we talked with people we had zero romantic interest in - like our own mother.

Anyway. We DID get a different therapist. And something he said helped a LOT with our concerns about having DID. He said our issues with our husband stemmed from his controlling behavior and emotional and verbal abuse, not our plurality - because after all, there's no mental illness called "supports queer people" nor "prefers to read speculative fiction and books on psychiatry" nor "confides in trusted friends about difficulties".

That said. Our therapist and his overseeing psychiatrist did talk with us about what our husband was pressuring us to do: try to get rid of all of the non-Willows. We had a lot of long, tense discussions about this with our system, and knew exactly what would happen if we tried.

We Willows would have been locked away from the front. Jas, Varyn, and Aery would have taken over as primary fronters, and we knew they'd have no problem with that based on our experiences with playing tug of war for front with them. Without us Willows, we may have developed memory issues, especially if we Willows fought back or resisted. This also would have caused us significant stress which would have triggered our fibromyalgia, and may easily have gotten to the point we would have to stop working because we physically couldn't handle it. And undoubtedly it would have caused us social issues as well, because those three can't mimic us Willows well at all, and prefer to be overt anyway, and probably would have used that to put extra pressure on our husband John: "Sorry, you can't talk to Willow right now. I can take a message to her. When we she be back? Idk, whenever John stops being an ass."

This, per our therapist and psychiatrist, would have been enough for a dx of DID or at bare minimum OSDD-1 - and then our ex would have had a much easier time getting us involuntarily committed. (As he did actually try. Got the state involved and there was a court case and everything.)

Because being endogenic and having tulpas is not what defines whether you have DID/OSDD-1 or not - it's whether there's distress or dysfunction. Doesn't have to be constant, doesn't have to be severe, just has to be present enough to make it harder to function.

Also, we've been in therapy from that time till now, for our depression and PTSD. Those cause us distress and dysfunction. Being plural doesn't - it eases our distress and increases our ability to function. We get worse when we Willows try to do everything on our own.

Also? Tulpas absolutely ARE endogenic - they aren't caused by trauma, and that's all endogenic means.

And. We were not told by Reddit that our headmates are tulpas. When we stumbled on the community, we recognized that what we had done in creating our headmates unintentionally was the same things people in the community were doing on purpose.

We remember sitting down and coming up with the idea of Jas. We remember learning to hear her, in vague images and ideas at first, then longer and longer full conversations. We remember the thrill of first hearing her interrupt our thoughts. We used to have several notebooks and binders full of written down conversations between us, with us Willows doing all the writing for the most part but on occasion Jas would take over just enough to write her own notes - in her own handwriting, different from us Willows' handwriting. We remember meditating to improve our ability to hear her. We remember visiting her in the paracosm, and her visiting us at our writing desk and on the school bus and sitting next to us at church. We remember her creating Varyn. We remember creating Morrie, and when he went dormant. We remember making Tristan&, and when she broke off communication with us - they'll still only talk to Jas.

Point is, we know their origins, all of them. We were there.

There's no "they were there all along." There's no "we don't know where they came from so we just assume they're endogenic." They certainly don't have roles or even the natural abilities of alters - we had to learn to talk with them, we had to learn how to let them front, we had to learn how to switch.

Some of them identify as soulbonds due e to their connection to their home worlds, but "tulpa" still fits too. Even though some of them cringe at the word, as it's uncomfortably close to a term in the paracosm's primary language for something truly heinous.

Point is, Reddit didn't try and convince us of anything. We came to that conclusion all on our own - and not just us Willows, but the whole system.

And per our mental health care team, we don't fit the criteria for a dissociative disorder. We don't even have issues with general dissociation - we score a 10 on the DES-2, and only that much because of questions directly related to plurality, like hearing voices commenting on your actions. (The eternal peanut gallery lol)

Anyway. Back to Dr. Richard Loewenstein - he was told about our origins. He didn't say that our origins were the reason we did or did not have a dissociative disorder. He said it's about distress.

And now that we've long since kicked our abusive ex to the curb (along with the church that turned on us), we don't have even interpersonal issues like we had with him and them. The people we're close to understand and support us. Our health care team supports us, and even encourages us Willows to lean on the rest of our system as that's what's healthiest for us all.

We don't have a mild case of a dissociative disorder. We're not secretly traumagenic.

We're ready and able to even fight for things our ex threatened us with, including our ability to be out at work, our ability to go through the foster-to-adopt program in our state (and our mental health care team is willing to sign off on our ability to do that), and our ability to be free from the threat of involuntary commitment to an institution.

If our ex, the pastor-counselor, several of our ex friends, state medical officials, and more couldn't find enough proof to diagnose us with DID or get us committed, (versus our therapist and the overseeing psychiatrist and our parents), then there's nothing anything y'all can say that will prove what they could not.

#syscourse #@mandellaeffect

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

Shouldn't BPD and NPD be simply called MPD? since each of these disorders have at least two or multiple personalities?

this ask confuses me greatly❓❓❓

BPD and NPD do not have multiple personalities, pwBPD and NPD often struggle with identity confusion/identity disturbance, but that doesn't mean we have multiple personalities. alters (the proper term for what i guess you mean by personality) are caused by a type of disssociation called identity alteration, which is different from identity confusion/disturbance and happens in CDDs (DID, OSDD-1, ect). BPD may be expliclity included in the theory of structural dissociation, but dissociative parts in BPD are often not autonomous enough to be considered alters.

someone can definitely experience both though, coming from a DID system with BPD and NPD.

#not culture #info

[blackholemojis]

How about a few of these for DID and OSDD and the like: "new alter" (for when someone new pops up and doesn't know their identity yet), "front-stuck" (for when a specific altar/headmate cannot leave the front and is stuck in the convo), "switchy" (for when they feel a switch coming on or is switching a lot very fast) and either "incoming Little" or "Little incoming" whichever looks nicer (for when a Little is about to front and type and needs discretion/keeping an eye on)

Sure thing!

[ID: the following written in purple bubble letters: 1) new alter, 2) frontstuck, 3) switchy, 4) little incoming. /End ID]

#body & brain emojis #mental health emojis #system community #system emojis