#plz let me know if you like this kind of thing with original pics and original poetry

[yourdaddyfigure]

Plz Read Before Interacting!

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First, please I can't say this enough, DO NOT address me as Daddy. EVER. May it be in comments, messages, or even ask. Yes, I am a Daddy, but I am not YOUR Daddy.

I very much love interacting with my mutuals and following. Feel free to come chat! The best way to reach me is through an ask which is open to all.🫶🏼 I am more likely to reply to asks & anons, all I ask is you be respectful and I promise to do the same. Note I’m not interested in any sexting, so if that’s your endgame here you will be sadly disappointed. I’d rather have genuine conversations and hear about your interests instead.

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#🏷️ #malakai’s txt post #malakai’s ask #malakai’s pics #important #blocklist #my puppy 🐶 #my cat 🐱 #my mutuals post 🤌🏻

[mybruisedankleneedsakiss]

but but tell me about the stars

#q #parallels #queue #indie #indie night #town vibes #small town vibes #love #love poetry #poetry #plz let me know if you like this kind of thing with original pics and original poetry #original poetry #prose poetry #prose #sapphic poetry #poetic #vibes #rooftop pictures #i took these pictures after a thunderstorm #it was actually really really dark and i took them from my android phone #ik yuck but still

[thesoundofaghost-mp3]

May's tutorial on how to take 2000s looking pics! This is not just for scene and/or emo kids, although ofcourse yall can use this!

Here are a few things you can do to make pictures look like they were taken in the 2000s!

What better way to look 2000s than when you use 2000s technology?

Exemples of things you could take a pic with are: an ipod, or any mp3 player actually, 2000s looking cd players, PS2 controllers (make sure it actually looks like you're playing or believe me, someone will notice!) or xbox controller (if you use older consoles of any type, the vibe might look more 90s but if you manage you can still make it work)

If you can't take a picture next to or with 2000s technology... anything? Well maybe you can take a selfie with a fliphone, or a T Mobile Sidekick (if you have one, lucky you!) or even a Nintendo DS if you've got one of those with the camera! Mirror selfies were also a thing of the (mid?) 2000s if they were taken with an actual camera! Let's also not forget the webcam pictures!

Here's one I took for example:

Special "effects"/ Editing:

One thing that makes almost all pictures look so much more aesthetic/better: putting the flash on! I promise it works almost all of the time, the picture will look more high quality and clearer even though it is the same quality as without! If you think your outfit might not be too great or you'd like to make it look like it was taken with a low quality phone, blur the picture! It could also just look artistic, which works just as good.

As for the editing, Glitter, like edits made on Blingee, turning up the contrast, putting a filter (or a few) that give off a blue hue or darker, add in your FriendProject profile number, or your nickname in a grungy font, or photoshop yourself in front of a cute butterfly background!

The poses and angles!

Taking a picture with only this information might not be enough to make it look as 2000s as you want it to be, so now let's see another thing; the poses and the angles! Especially when you take a selfie, do not understimate the power of the "myspace angle" as you might've heard before, the super high angle from which you take the selfie, in which you could include your whole outfit. I know, out of experience, that the position in which you have to try and stand to get your whole outfit in the picture is very, VERY uncomfortable, but trust me it's worth it!

Here's an example:

Other angles/poses you could use are for example the ones in which you position the camera, phone or whatever you take your pictures with at your feet, put a timer or make someone take the picture for you, in an angle at which your feet will look bigger than your head and your whole outfit will be visible again! This one's hard to explain but here's an example, again from one of my pics because I couldn't find one from someone else: (putting "myspace picture big feet" on google, does in fact, not work)

Shoutouts from most known myspace celebs were a big thing back then, with the name of someone (or their own, partly to prove they aren't catfish) written on their hand or a piece of paper, as well as showing off fake tattoos made with sharpies, or something like "I love you!" on the palm of your head, so standing there showing it, could, somehow be a pose? I guess so... oh well, this is still something that would've been on this list!

There are many more (like for example the ones where your legs look broken as you sit on the floor, or the one where you are showing off your room plastered with posters..) but just know not to just stand there looking lost (unless that's what you're going for), be either VERY dramatic with the poses or super casual, no in betweens or you'll probably look awkward!

Dramatic makeup and hair!

Of course... To keep on being dramatic, because the 2000s very much were, (as every decade, in their own way, but you get what I mean) hair was often in crazy colors and or haircuts! Even if you were neither emo nor scene, celebrities like Christina Aguilera or Kelly Clarkson, to Matt Tuck (that's right!) had highlights in their hair, or just dyed parts of their hair, usually blonde, black or red, but chalk haircolor exists in many colors, so go crazy on that!

See here:

Not only that but side ponytails, extensions, crimped hair, face framing bangs, spiky gelled hair etc. Even if you aren't emo or scene, your hair can cover one of your eyes for the picture!

Makeup had to be very visible, especially as a scene kid or emo kid with the overflowing amount of eyeliner, and colorful mascara or anything that you could find to be original and "artsy" really, but also for any other person! Makeup looks that were usual attire were for example: LIPGLOSS, blue, purple, white or eyeshadow, frosty pink lipstick, a lot of mascara, colorful eyeliner, rosy cheeks, or lined lips (darker on the outside) but none of that would be complete without thin eyebrows! Fake tans are also a go-to if you're feeling it!

Now, if you're too scared to use hairchalk or dye your hair, and you aren't too good at makeup, no worries, you've still got other options!

Props and accessories!

Big sunglasses.. yes, even indoors! Rimmed glasses, Colored lenses, "Bug eye" sunglasses, there are many to choose from! Scarves, very unnecessary but pretty cool looking! Hoop earrings were also in! For guys too, jewelry was often worn, for example diamond earrings, shell necklaces, as well as the typical "gangsta wear", you would've guessed it: the dollar sign necklace or chunky golden chains/necklaces. They were ofcourse not first worn during the 2000s, but they were definitely still very much worn then! Other jewelry often worn were silly bands, wristbands, kandi bracelets and necklaces. You can even wear fake piercings!

As for headwear, still many to choose from, like trucker hats, both for guys and girls and anyone who'd like to wear those, bandanas, fedora hats, (do not recommend, 80% of the time you'll look awkward, but you can't know if you're part of the 20% that could rock the look if you don't atleast try, I guess) "baker boy hats" and big huge bows for all my scene beans out there. Belts. BeLtS! A lot, too much, 3 of them, or one big one, just find whatever you have and wear the goddamn belts! Fishnets! Fingerless gloves! They were very much in, and not just for scemo kids!

Not only is it about things you can wear, but also things you can use for the picture, you can look cute while holding a plush toy, (bonus points if you've got a gloomy bear, hello kitty or gir plush!) mysterious while holding a notebook/ diary of some sort or nerdy with your favorite book, but a lot of pictures get much more fun when they are super random, for example like kiki kannibal, just casually holding a lamp in her garden...

Clothing!

Now, this one will be short as I will mainly give you guys links to some articles that talk about 2000s fashion, but here's a thing: If you're going for a very "in your face" kind of style, go fully crazy lol! Scene kids get your neon green tights or red ripped skinnies out and wear all of the colors, preps wear your shiniest Playboy logo shirt, goths and emos you better wear your nicest black knee high converse, all of it!! Go fucking over the top because truly, it was rarely ever over the top in the 2000s! Also, did I mention? Cringe culture is dead, nobody cares if you somehow manage to truly go a little too far! If you're feeling yourself, don't hesitate to show a little skin, (I don't mean totally naked, duh, especially if you're a minor plz no it's usually a very bad idea) ain't nothing wrong with mini skirts or crop tops! (guys, GUYS please wear them too if you feel like it, I promise you a lot of us think that's hot okaythatsall)

Anyway, here's a few articles on the fashion/clothes! Most of these include also accessories etc but you'll find a lot about clothes!

Includes men's clothing too!

https://www.complex.com/style/best-fashion-trends-of-early-2000s/

Yes.. I know.. Buzzfeed.. But oh well, it's still showing the clothes and fashion like we need! There isn't much for guys here, but there is inspo to take from it lol!

https://www.buzzfeed.com/leonoraepstein/forgotten-early-2000s-trends

Now, I know what this one says... apparently all of these trends were"mistakes"... Well who's gonna laugh when 2000s style makes a comeback? Definitely not them, once they look back on this article!

https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/beauty/fashion/g2898/worst-2000s-fashion-trends/

This article includes men's fashion and also includes a link to buy the items! That is, if you've got 35$ to spend on a cap for example... Which I don't, but that's okay, it's got pretty good examples of the fashion!

https://spy.com/gallery/2000s-fashion-trends-throw-back-style/

And since I couldn't find a good article on 2000s alt fashion, I made a Pinterest board with a few exemples for Scene, Emo, Goth, Mallgoth/Goth, Visual Kei and Cybergoth! There isn't a lot yet, but you'll get the general idea :)

https://www.pinterest.fr/mayskelly/2000s-alt-styles/

I hope you guys like it, and try it! I think I may share my favorite attempts if enough people do it on my instagram story and here, and tumblr as well if anyone participates in this!

#emo #scene #scemo #scenecore #emocore #fun #tutorial #2000s core #2000s #2000 #2001 #2002 #2003 #2004 #2005 #2006 #2007 #2008 #2009 #2010 #preps #goths #everyone #contest #participate! #participate

[slitherbop]

@ anon thank you very much for eating my art!!!!

@uwakingu i uUUUUHH am really not great at giving art tips or explaining a process but i will try.. i think.. whats the best thing about colouring is that truly you can use anything and it doesnt matter if you break free from what makes sense. though i will abide to things like values and completemary yadda yadda stuff sometimes because thats stuff that kind of makes sense to me. mostly its just when i look at colours together and it looks nice to me im like epic ill run with this (i rarely choose colours in advance its just waht is cool for whatever im feeling) and as for composition.. idk i learned basic stuff in highschool where rule of thirds and balance YADDA YADDA that kind of stuff, its helpful to know if you really want to go all out!! again though! rules dont matter, for my collage-looking pics i dont care about composition and fit things togehter like puzzle pieces., also.. my art.. has Flaws and thats EPIC becuase i can do anyhting with my drawings!!!!! UNFORTUNATELY this doesnt explain how i do it ive still been meaning to do something of a speedpaint... anyway thank you so much for liking my art enough to be curious about it im so glad...... :’D

im gonna take this opportuninty of rambling to say to you reading this on your dashboard, you, artist, out there...im bout to give you some nuggets of wisDome that i was thinking about the otheeeer day

so its been recently that i personally felt that ive unlocked my satisfaction with the pics that i make (though i still have great off days -_-) and like dude.. you know how pwople say like let yourself have fun drawing whatever you want (so long as its harmless you freaks) that is true!! you let yourself indulge in things that bring you joy like thats genuine and epic! that is mostly referring to subject matter liek you want to draw your own original stuff or fanart for that thing you like you know something youre worried your brain made you think was not like the usual thing you used to draw. i think it also goes the same for HOW you want to draw, like if you see some colours that you thought was interesting but it wasnt something you are confident in trying its Cool DUDE thats YOUR own artwork and nobody can make it like you would!!!! or there is something youve always wanted to try with your style you go ahead and have fun experimenting.. plz, learn to let yourself indulge in the way you draw, like find whatever it is that you find is most satisfying to draw and DO THAT. and when afterwords you felt you found something youre proud of thats epic!! if you ever feel though that even you cant settle for that, thats okay because you can just try again with something different. you may have a varitey of styles within you and you never have to limit yourself!! so.. if you dont like how a drawing is turning out.. thats also okay cuz you can just move on to the next drawing cuz youre constantly growing so long as you keep going!!! thanks for listening to me if you did have an epic win of a night

#long text post #if those arent your jjam #i didnt expect to ramble i was just eating a burrito on the net now im gonna go back to reading mbopsycho mango omg

[sscng]

 ADELINE RUDOLPH ─ SERENA SONG identifies as CISFEMALE and uses SHE/HER pronouns. they’re an ACTRESS, and they’re only TWENTY-THREE they’re said to be +RESOURCEFUL, but also -SELFISH. i guess that’s why they’re known as THE SENSUALIST in the tabloids. 

yooooo i’m faye, your local dumb bitch, and i have arrived w my Hot Mess daughter, serena. i apologize in advance bc this intro got FAR too long, i got uhhhh VERY carried away- plz love us anyway!! (tw: brief mention of miscarriage, drug use mention) 

background: - grew up in manhattan   - her family has got $$$$ - her family is SUPER catholic and so she grew up in a very religious, very conservative household - she has an older sister and three younger brothers- her sister is, like, Perfect and her parents were always nagging serena to be just like her; her little brothers annoy her constantly, but she would die for them all - not a fan of her parents- her dad is distant with all the kids and her mom is the one who was always cracking down on the kids to be the best possible and would always call them out for ‘sinning’- which, as expected, created a Totally Healthy environment for serena to grow up in - she was always the wild child- sneaking out, partying, breaking curfew; she was grounded more than she wasn’t grounded growing up - her sophomore year of high school, though, she had a pregnancy scare (she lost the baby and is lowkey fucked up over it, but refuses to acknowledge genuine emotions SO good luck ever getting her to open up about that part of her life) and her parents FREAKED out and sent her off to a prep school in connecticut where she spent the rest of her high school days- breaking every rule and pulling off pretty good grades - skipped out on college- much to her parents’ dismay- to pursue acting - got a job on a netflix show about three years ago and has been riding that fame ever since - the show is a degrassi-esque drama about college-aged kids called university heights (yes, i AM very original, yes that IS an apartment complex at my school)- the show is Hot Garbage, but it’s ok bc serena ????? is ALSO Hot Garbage

personality: - to clarify to start off: really and truly The Worst- which seems to have become the only type of character i can play??? does this say something about me??? perhaps!! - is selfish, impatient, crazy, wild, temperamental as FUCK - but she’s a lot of fun (maybe, idk) - down to party whenev (uses A Lot of recreational drugs and drinks a lot)  - dtf always - is bisexual as hell (not a personality trait??? but being gay is like the one good facet of my persona SO) - cares about herself A LOT - will fight you for now reason and then will never mention it again unless you bring it up- honestly just joins in on drama For Fun - surprisingly, has her life together (despite the drugs etc) and knows what she wants from her future - is the kind of person who you’re like ???? she’s SMART??? And she’s like ‘uh fuck yeah i am, lemme break down this stupidly long calculus problem real quick before i break down your ego’ - not very reliable unless she’s close to you - cares what VERY few people think of her, literally values the opinion of maybe five people total - she’s horrible - let her ruin your life !!

~fun~ facts: - DEFINITELY runs in heels as a weird flex - secretly kept a pet snake as a kid- her mom eventually found out and made her get rid of it - was an alter girl for a hot sec before ‘accidentally’ setting the priest’s robes on fire and getting kicked from the roster - was a mathlete in hs and if anyone said shit about it she would say some rude shit back to them and then sleep with their significant other probably (idk just painting a picture) - is left-handed - can play the violin - favorite color is periwinkle, but she refuses to wear anything in that color - is also a business mogul, secretly sells feet pics on the internet- she doesn’t need the money, she just thinks it’s fun - wants to be loved (a fun fact Only bc it is a fuckin SECRET, ok??? ok!)

possible connections: - exes- uhhhh LOVE a good exes plot (or several), the messier the better, serena is Bad at relationships and monogamy and i love the drama of this shit SO (would love like a ex she cheated on, an ex she still fucks- whatever your heart desires tbh) - best friend(s)- a person she truly trusts and who she isn’t afraid to be a little vulnerable around and preferably someone who is not afraid to call her out when she’s being shitty (which is often) - will they won’t they- PLEASE give me this sort of angsty, painful friendship/relationship; serena will be stupid and dramatic as hell - the one that got away- could be an ex, maybe someone in her life she just hooked up with once or twice, maybe someone she’s just super fuckin close to and has always had a secret thing for- but it’s like the Only person she’s ever been ~in love~ with - tooth-rotting crushy bullshit- um someone come make this asshole fall in love with them- it will not be fun for either of them, but it will be fun for us - best guy friend- idk i just love a strictly platonic guy/girl dynamic - enemies (for dumb reasons, most likely)- serena doesn’t really hold grudges, but she loves to have beef with people for literally no reason bc it keeps things ~exciting~ and she’s chaotic - good influence- someone ??? help her ??? - fwb/hookups (past or present or future, idk, fuck me up) - enemies with benefits- c’mon… i cannot resist this fun - party friends- someone to join her in her crazy antics - cousins- i literally… love family plots - unlikely duos

but uhhh literally, suggest anything to me and i’m prob gonna be down!!! if u read all of this..... u deserve a cash prize (but i am broke so v sry, that will arrive on february 30 of next yr); hit the like button if u wanna plot or hmu !!! xoxo 

#excessintro #well #lots of word vomit jfc

[leonbastralle]

Reply Post Work Of Ages - For Rosa

grumpysimmies replied to your photo “Final version of my summer palette sim! Holiday Guava Smoothie (or...”

She's so pretty ♥️

Thankies :3

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

I'm so happy ;___;

GOOD CAUSE YOU DESERVE ALL THE HAPPINESS

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “B: *fangirling intensifies*”

Same Blaze same

so you’ve been there for their original selves? :o sometimes I feel like it’s been an actual lifetime! (no offense to their mum)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “J: Why did they not let me bring my child…”

That's too bad :c

Well I snuck in a pic a while ago ;)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Surprise guest! This lovely lady actually made her way into TS4 xDI...”

I KNEW IT (see I checked it out :p)

YOU DID tumblr only showed me a small bit of these but now my crazy activity line makes more sense xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Meet the last baby of gen 5 (and our heiress), Monarch! Thanks to...”

Here's another adorable child ;__; ♥️

that you’ve seen before :P

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Father and son ;_;”

THIS IS SO FREAKING ADORABLE MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT

IKR THOSE DAMN PIXEL CATS

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Pointy grew ♥”

Too cute ♥️

she was highkey my fave for quite a while tbh

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Bryony found this pirate and his first mate at the library! Sadly, no...”

A bit disappointing but it makes sense they came there to read xD

*gasps* how dare

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

BUT SERIOUSLY LOOK AT THAT FACE

TRUST ME I HAVE LOOKED MANY TIMES

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Glow had a bad day at school :/ he was stressed about an exam and then...”

Aww poor baby :c

I have a lot of feels for him ♥

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Telling an adventure story.”

Why are they all so cute ;____;

Idk man. The Miracles have always had a certain kind of magic about them...

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A: *gasps* That good? F: *laughs* Quite. I think it’s good that you’re...”

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

YES

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “F: Aureus? Could you come over here for a moment?”

I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ALL MY LIFE

;________;

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “G: Please, save me.”

He grew up so fast ;___;

he actually did because I never have any patience xD longer life spans would mean 3 times as many pics as I have now, and I could not handle posting that.

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “GUESS WHO GOT AN A”

I love him ♥️

duuuude same

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “rly”

How can you actually reject this adorable tiger ;___;

Idk man, Shimmer had some serious issues as a tot...and I’m talking REAL serious.

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Now he’s shy.”

AWWWWW WHY IS HE ACTING SO CUTE ♥️_♥️

CAUSE HE IS THE SWEETEST

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A: Oh man, that movie though! Shine please, I really need a hug. S:...”

This is too adorable ;___;

ikr ;_; I need to make a ‘fave Flame/Aur parenting moments’ poll XD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “dun dun dunnnnnNNN”

Gotta love him ♥️

say it louder for the anti ts4 ppl in the back ;)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

They're seriously too cute ♥️

now I feel like I need to play them again and like a whole lot but I can’t

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “G: Wow, I can’t believe I once was in there, too!”

That's deep Glow xD

Glow’s a philosopher ;)

grumpysimmies replied to your photo

She's just perfect ♥️

Is it bad that I feel the same way even tho she’s my own sim

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A little private celebration ;_;”

I love them ;_;

me too man they give me life...to think Aur noped out of the whole thing at first is like...what

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “G: Look daddy! I no throw food this time! Daddy proud? F: !!”

It's impossible to stay mad and not be proud ;___;

especially if you’re Flame, he’s the most chill dad

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

An adorable dad ♥️

yES BUT ALSO HOW IS HE A DAD HE CAN’T BE A DAD SHOOT ME

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “F: Oh, you mean this? G: *giggles* Dad noooooo! F: Ah, I understand....”

akdjfkddfjirk my heart oh god ♥️

;_; trust me I died writing these

grumpysimmies replied to your photo “LANI LOOOOVES YA”

And I love her ;_; ♥️

good ;)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “He was right. F: How exactly is this baby coming out now? Dear...”

This is a question no one wants to answer xD

seems that way, looking at the comments xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

too precious ;_;

not exactly sure what this was about, but I’m assuming Flame, so yes

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Confident bump watch.”

I never knew I needed pregnant Flame in my life so much before this ;____; ♥️

I’M CRYING STOP THIS

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “F: G-greetings, uh, Berryverse…this is…no, this is not clickbait, I...”

As if Aur could leave you forever!

Flame believes that, but at the same time there’s always this really small voice in your head you know? I mean, four children later he’s quite sure xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “J: And that would be my clue to leave.”

Poor Jewel xD

nah, they’re cool about it xD like it was them and Bonsai who made Aureus rethink his priorities, so. I’m sure these two will have a fangirling moment once Jewel gets home and tells Bonsai about how cute they are.

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

zkdjkkfrild look at him ;__; ♥️

;_;

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “But don’t worry, I’ve got a feeling nobody can dislike Aur for too...”

Is it even possible to dislike him :o

Idk man, he has quite some opponents in politics too xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “I could watch them play all day, honestly.”

Same ♥️

Good thing they do it professionally xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “F: Greetings, Berryverse! This is it, the moment you’ve all been...”

OMG I'M IMAGINING FLAME FANBOYING ON THE FLOOR AND AAAAAAH

IKR

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Introduction in some brighter light xD It was indeed four legs as you...”

afkdkdjfirk I know I've already seen them but they're so adorable ♥️

they are the preshest ;_;

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Solely for bump watch purposes.”

She looks so good while pregnant ;__; ♥️

DOESN’T SHE

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A: The car…you fixed it. I-I like the colors. E: Let’s…not talk about...”

You freaking idiot x_x

he’s quite pathetic at times, it’s just part of his personality to use big phrases and to feel sorry for himself I guess xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “C: You know, with you…I think this whole immortality thing might not...”

My heart ;___; ♥️

I KNOW

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A: Uuuuuuu… F: Girl. This better not be a scary time sickness, because...”

We all know what's going on

suuuuure but let me try at least xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “CALEB DON’T BE MEAN TO ADDIE ;_;”

Addie doesn't deserve this :c

well I mean she’s dating a chipmunk and still has impure thoughts about a moth so maybe she does

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Meanwhile back home…”

At least SOME PEOPLE GET TO BE HAPPY

YES SOME PEOPLE SOMETIMES

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “E: I’m sorry, Ally. I should’ve never kissed you, hell, I should’ve...”

why u gotta do this ;__;

cause I gotta

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A: It’s getting late. When are we going to sort out that stuff that...”

Gosh I'm so glad the queue didn't end on me xD

ah dammit you ruined everything xD

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “E: I DIDNT KNOW YOU DANCED SO WELL!! A: NEITHER DID I! YOU SEEM TO...”

why are they so precious ;__;

cause I want them to be :P

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

akjfkjskzkj she's too cute ;___;

ngl this pic is actually one of my faves (it was Ally sniffing the flower I checked)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Your best friend is always more important than housework.”

Sometimes I feel like anything is more important than housework (plz don't think I never clean my house xD)

you’re right tho

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Is it just me, or is something going on here…?”

THIS IS BEAUTIFUL I LOVE IT

THANK YOU

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset

So beautiful ;____;

she’s a very pretty Caleb clone

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “E: I think now is the time to stop ignoring it, Ally. A:...”

akfjdkdjfkgkg HE HAS A WAY WITH WORDS I'm just dead

he does sometimes, when my brain cooperates

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “A: Please. Can we just cuddle and not think about anything that...”

akfkjdkdjfkfjdkf EUGENE OMG

he knows just how to woo the Allies

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Button needs some soul food to process all this.”

Plz protect this child ;_;

I’m sure she’s safely hidden under someone’s bed ;)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “Fable, I think Victoria might have adopted you… V: SHE’S SO SQUISHY!!...”

Who wouldn't want to adopt Fable tho

Idk man I could use her pro skills

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “V: Oh my, what a huge mess. I didn’t expect such a thing to ever...”

Capri Sun you pure soul ;__;

Capri Sun is the best and it’s gonna get better (wait spoilers? shhh you didn’t see anything)

grumpysimmies replied to your photoset “F: Capri Sun, are you in? CS: Positive. Copying relevant data to your...”

I like Fable too ;____;

Idk why I thought she needed this part, but I’m glad I did because otherwise she would’t have gotten so big and I wouldn’t have had the idea for her story either!

#grumpysimmies #replies #non-sims #saviorhide

[weeklyhumorist]

Bedbug Influencer Seeking New Instagram Management

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Hi, I’m Shmedbug the Bedbug. I’m like @itsdougthepug, but just, you know, a bedbug. I’m not as well known as Doug, but that’s gonna change as soon as I find a better manager.

The rules of Instagram dictate that the tinier the animal, the more famous it is. Case in point: the kitty @iamlilbub. Really, I should be killing the Insta game. So why hasn’t Purina reached out for a collab?

I’ll tell you why: JEFF.

Jeff and I have been living together as man and bug for two months, and Jeff has yet to post a cleverly captioned pic of me on the ’gram that garners any positive buzz. He doesn’t even include my NAME in the handle. Smh. What kind of animal influencer manager names the account after himself?! (F for effort, Jeff. That’s just SAD.)

Jeff posts unflattering pictures of me on his Insta story (caption: “Ew, what’s this? They’re all over my mattress rn”), pictures of his arms with bites (caption: “Can anyone identify these itchy bumps? Plz help”), and pictures of his hospital wristband (caption: “Mood”). It’s not my fault that Jeff is allergic to me. People are also allergic to cats! Cats do evil things! They hiss and taunt and scratch. But does @nala_cat’s manager post pictures of her scratched-up skin? NO. Because she actually wants Nala’s career to thrive. There’s something called discretion. (Remember that, Jeff. Discretion.)

Pet Influencers have everything that pets have historically craved: attention, fancy treats, and paid promotions. Doug the Pug, with his 3.7M followers, is #goals. He has merch, a New York Times bestseller, and the title, “King of Pop Culture.” But he doesn’t do it alone. His manager networks with celebs, posts quality content, and takes Doug on tour. My human, on the other hand, doesn’t even geotag my pics, let alone get me a Doug-like cameo in a Katy Perry music video. And I’m getting salty.

Jeff wouldn’t even have to work that hard! I can think of the cutest branding ideas off the top of my head. They’ll call me BB for short. Any pic at the Museum of Ice Cream will def boost my presence. And I could easily have my “thing”–Doug has pizza, some of the more basic pets have avocados, and I’ll have blood. I mean, how on brand is that?! Plus, blood is trending. There are 79.4k #phlebotomy and 4.9M #vampire hashtags on Instagram. Unlike Jeff, my ideal new manager will realize that you gotta give these sick blood-loving humans what they want.

I’d understand if the only animals out here living their best lives on IG were the traditionally lovable ones. Like @jiffpom, that makes sense. Even I am like, Yasss, Jiff the Pomeranian, go get ’em.

But can we take a minute to talk about @pumpkintheraccoon? Humans HATE raccoons. Humans literally MURDER raccoons, and yet Pumpkin is thriving on social media. Jeff has no excuse. It’s almost like he’s not even TRYING to be my Instagram manager. (Facepalm, Jeff.)

We’re living in a beautiful moment. This is the time for Jill the Squirrel (@this_girl_is_a_squirrel), Mr. Bagel the Chinchilla (@chinnybuddy), and other nontraditional cuddlebuddies (and soon to be…cuddle-bugs!). They’re out here running the Instaverse and I am Here. For. It.

If any aspiring managers are out there looking to get rich and famous, hmu! I’m officially putting myself up for Instadoption. Just brush by Jeff on his daily trek to 7-11 and I’ll slide over to you like a hot DM. I’m a solid bet because I fit all of the criteria to achieve animal Instafame: I’m little, humans love to share pics of me, and I’ve  got the lingo down. Most of all, I’m def going viral because as a bedbug, I’m notorious for spreading.

Bedbug Influencer Seeking New Instagram Management was originally published on Weekly Humorist

#bedbugs #instagram

[amorremanet]

10, 23, 37, 42

asks for fanfic writers.

10. how do you do your researches?

Depends on what I’m researching, but usually, it starts with Google and/or Wikipedia, unless I have other sources that are immediately on-hand, or that have pointed me to places I should be looking. Sometimes, I’ll go use my grad student access to various academic databases for something that is actually useful.

Then, I filter through the stuff to find contradictions I should look at, find the pieces that are unreliable (e.g., gossip journalism with no demonstrable basis in fact, history about POC that was written by white people, LGBTIQ history written by straight people, things that might have been questionably translated, etc.). And then I sorta have to play it by ear, because this is about when it starts getting more variable, based on what I’m researching and what I’ve found or not.

23. least favorite story you’ve ever written

Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically? That being said:

* A lot of my old school, “I wrote this when I was fifteen and so deeply closeted that I was Katniss Everdeen levels of, ‘Everybody seems to know my secrets before I know them myself’ before Katniss was even a character who existed, and I really, really thought I was straight for like a minute. A really extended minute” Wolfstar fics are capital-B BAD.

Like, they’re OOC as fuck, they buy into all of the heterosexist and misogynistic top/bottom bullshit that fandom is still so fond of, I forced myself to write a bunch of fluff that I hated and that is absolutely disgusting to me because it’s: 1. overly derivative of “The Shoebox Project” but with absolutely no nuance or depth (so like, the fanon version of TSBP), because, like every other Wolfstar shipper at the time, I loved it and unfortunately, I subsequently emulated it way too much in my own writing, because I was fifteen and thought the only way to find any kind of a place or friends in fandom was to do the popular thing

Pro-tip, kids at home: this is an absolutely bullshit way to try and find a place or friends in fandom. It just straight up DOES NOT WORK.

All of the happy feels that resemble friendship you get will be totally surface-level at best, and unless you are really socially competent — which I was and still am not — you won’t be able to translate it into any meaningful connections with anyone else, because they won’t really be accepting YOU.

They will be giving you attention and appreciation, but you’ll be more or less the same as everyone else who’s doing The Popular Thing Of The Moment, especially if you’re creating content for a huge ship, like Wolfstar was at the time — or for newer examples, like K*laine, like S*terek, like V*iktuuri, like Skittles after a certain point, like [insert literally any popular dudeslash otp here] — but they won’t be accepting YOU, YOURSELF.

If what you are legitimately into happens to be The Popular Thing, then disregard this and keep doing your thing because you’re doing it in earnest and that means that you actually ARE sharing yourself with people through the content you make, and have an actual chance of finding a fannish place for yourself and finding friends in fandom who actually value you as a person, and not just as a creator of The Popular Thing.

But for everybody who’s just doing The Popular Thing because it happens to be The Popular Thing? No. Stop that. You are better and you deserve so much better than that.

Find what really makes you happy. This is a deceptively simple idea, because finding your bliss as a content creator — or the thing that gives you the most sense of purpose as a content creator, since tbh, finding happiness as a content creator is often going to feel pretty impossible — it’s hard. It takes time. It takes a lot of trial and error, it takes soul-searching, it might very well take skydiving and seeing what flashes through your mind (it didn’t for me but I wouldn’t be very surprised if it did for someone)

—but whatever it takes? Find what kind of content it REALLY makes you happy to create, and then do that. It won’t always be The Popular Thing, and yes, let’s be honest, it will fucking suck to put your heart and soul into something, only to feel like people are just totally ignoring it.

But it’s also more likely to help you find people who genuinely share your interests and who are more likely to click with you (especially out in Rarepair Hell; there aren’t enough of us, so we sometimes end up bonding more tightly), and in the end?

Artistic integrity and truly making something that you can be proud of? That’s worth more than how many kudos or followers you can get by doing The Popular Thing when your heart isn’t actually in it.

This has been the most pretentious, “you’re a star, baby, just be yourself” PSA ever, and now back to our regularly scheduled self-deprecation!

and 2. Those old Wolfstar fluff pieces I wrote are gross to me now because they are so fucking emotionally dishonest — both to how Sirius and Remus are as characters, and to how I felt at the time, which was, “meh, varying degrees of miserable but with no functional idea why this is and even less of an idea of how to articulate it” — because I was so desperate to be accepted somewhere and get validation in the form of people on FF.net liking my terrible fanfic.

Like, every sin you can commit as a writer, I probably committed it with those fics and as such, they’re all completely atrocious. Even the “angsty” ones aren’t worth shit because I copped out and gave most of them either pasted-on happy endings or, “lol i am using canon as an excuse to not do a happy ending but i’m still not actually exploring everything as much as it deserves la la laaaaaa~ (somebody please please love me)” endings. They are all hooooooorrible, period, end of discussion.

There’s exactly one (1) that I wouldn’t burn if it were an actual printed book, and it’s the one that has ‘vaguely genderfluid but I didn’t have that word in my vocabulary in 2005’!Sirius having gender and presentation feels about wearing pretty skirts, and a parallel Hermione/Luna story about soft dapper butch!Hermione having gender and presentation feels about wanting to wear suits that were Totally Not Inspired By The Pics from And Fanart of Tipping The Velvet That I’d Seen Online, Nuh Uh, Nope (except that they totally were).

It’s still pretty, “meh” because I wrote it when I was fifteen, and if I were to rewrite it now, I’d do a looooot of things differently but still. It’s about the only not-horrible thing I ever wrote.

oh wait, actually? There are two (2) that I wouldn’t burn.

The other one, I wrote right after we first got HBP and found out that Remus had been out with the werewolves, on Top Seekrit Spy Missions!!! — it had Albus (who was still assumed by most of us to probably be having it off in secret with McGoogles because DH hadn’t happened yet and brought us G*rindeldore For Real Though) going to his office after handling shit with Harry and the kids and all of the Order members who got injured at the battle at the end of OOTP

Because it was a Wolfstar fic, Remus is naturally in said office.

It’s, like, dawn or getting close to it, and Albus is like, “well fuck shit dammit, how am i supposed to have this conversation with Remus when he’s probably going to clam up and emotionally retreat and try to say that he isn’t hurting about losing Sirius, and i can’t entirely call him on it without invalidating him — which i am especially sensitive to at the moment because Harry just almost called me out on it lol — and it’s not like his and Sirius’s relationship was ever simple like fuck, they have one of the most complicated relationships i’ve ever seen, crap fuck dammit, remus make this easy on both of us and let me comfort you okay”

And Remus is just like, “no, fuck that, dnw”

“i don’t suppose that i can ask what you’re planning to do”

“well i’m homeless again but it’s nbd”

“the order still has headquarters—”

“I AM NOT GOING TO LIVE IN GRIMMAULD PLACE WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF SUGGESTION IS THAT”

“i’m just saying—”

“please just give me some pasted-on condolences and then give me a mission so i don’t have to think about anything”

“that sounds like one of the most emotionally unhealthy ideas that you have ever had this week”

“hey, so, you need somebody to go do reconnaissance/outreach with the werewolves, right”

“um i think that can wait—”

“NO IT CAN’T TELL ME TO GO UNDERGROUND WITH THE OTHER GODDAMN WEREWOLVES”

“…………*dumble-sighs* remus, will you please go underground to do information gathering and outreach with the werewolves :/”

“yes. thank you, professor. i absolutely will.”

“this is still one of your worst ideas ever, jsyk”

“la la la can’t hear you over the sound of you giving me permission to do it la la la”

this is, at best, a really sketchy recreation of it that isn’t historically accurate on the grounds that i’m writing the sketch with the view of canon that i have now — minus the obvious omission of the Truth of Grindeldore — but that’s the basic outline of things

if I were to rewrite the thing now, I would do a lot of things differently

but the original fic isn’t completely without its merits, even if it could be a lot better

* “Close Enough For Rock and Roll” — Absolutely terrible, forever abandoned WIP because it’s absolutely terrible. It’s completely bogus D*estiel cis mpreg that has no reason to exist because it’s TERRIBLE. I cringe so hard whenever I get any FF.net emails about people liking it because…… ew. no. why would you even. I don’t even know you but plz. Love yourself and read something better, you deserve that.

* It is a closely-guarded secret of mine — by which I mean that it’s on my FF.net account — that once upon a time, I wrote D*rarry not once, but twice. They’re patently horrible fics, and there’s a reason for that. Namely: I don’t ship it, I have never shipped it, I have never for the life of me understood why it is A Thing, and I am never, ever GOING to ship it — usually, this would be shooting myself in the foot but it’s been 16+ years and I still don’t ship it, so I think I’m in the clear — but the girl I was in love with at the time dared me to write it, just to see if I could. She had a beautiful smile, but I refused to lose.

The fics are garbage and the only reason I don’t regret them is that nah nah nah nah nah nah, I won.

* It is a less closely-guarded secret of mine — by which I mean that it is up on my AO3 — that I wrote NC-17 S*terek once. I hate it a bit less than everything else I’ve listed here, because it’s not completely awful and I wrote it for a friend who’d been having a shitty time of things, and hey, it made her happy so mission accomplished — but it’s still pretty bad. It has a Derek who’s a darker shade of morally gray than he usually is and unnecessarily special!Stiles and consent that is at best highly questionable (though at least I acknowledge it and tagged it as such).

But mostly I hate it because I don’t actually ship that and have so many better fics but ugh, of course the garbage, poorly-written porn for the fandom’s favorite OTP is one of my most popular fics on AO3. UGGGGGGGGGGGGH.

37. canon or AU?

*shrugs* Both are good, it depends on how I feel today.

42. do you plan or do you write whatever comes to your mind?

………Can I just say, “yes” and leave it at that, like??? Sometimes one, sometimes the other, but usually, it’s a mix of both?

#memes for ts #addictsitter #ask box tag #mine: personal #mine: asks #writing is hard #fandom shenanigans #all caps// bolded// #longish post probably? #my fic #asks for fanfic writers

[king-of-space]

101 Dragon Age Questions

Going to answer it because I’m waiting for dinner

How did you get into Dragon Age? A friend of mine got a Bioware bundle I think, and gave me Origins.

Have you finished all three games? Nope, Currently starting Trespasser and at the beginning of DA2 (finished Origins)

How long did it take you to finish the series? I can say it took me around 50-ish hours to finish Origins and I’m currently at 105h on Inquisition.

What was your first Warden (gender/class/race/personality)? Curiously enough, it was a female mage elf. But since you can’t marry Alistair with that warden, I started a new game with a Warrior Female Human, Ellyah Cousland. Personality wise, I usually go for the dork sarcastic and maybe a tiny violent dialog. I can’t really remember, it was 2 years ago :T

What was your first Hawke like (gender/class/temperament)? First Hawke was a male mage, I actually forgot his name, with the sarcastic temperament. Best.Hawke.Ever

First Inquisitor (gender/class/race/personality)? Mage \female (my headcanon, they are agender but we have to choose one so YEH)\, again with the sarcasm violent dork. Also another headcanon, they aren’t a Lavellan, but a Mahariel (dalish origin from Origins), but that’s another story.

Favorite DA:O backstory? I only played the dalish mage and the noble warrior, so I’m going with the second one.

Preferred class overall? Mage. I wish they were stronger ;_;

Do you tend to play male or female characters most? Good question. I’d say it’s 50/50. Right now I have 2 male inquisitors created, and 1 female (let’s make it 2 then). on Origins I’ve only played female, on DA2 I’ve only played with males.

Share a pic of your favorite OC from any DA game. My “Lavellan”

Best Hawke quote? I have no idea, he’s a fun ball, all of them???

Do you prefer DA:O, DA2, or DA:I most? DA:O for nostalgia, DA:I for gameplay, DA2 for Handers

Favorite mission from DA:O? not the fade

Favorite DA:O party combo? Alistair, Morrigan and Zevran

Favorite DA:O companion overall? Alistair ;3c

DA:O: Did your Warden survive? She sure did

What did you name your Mabari? ...............I CAN’T REMEMBER???? 

Who did you choose to rule Fereldan? Alistair and Cousland duh 

Favorite mission from DA2? can’t say yet 

Was everyone loyal at the end? ladada da da dididada 

Did Hawke side with the Mages or Templars? Mages

Favorite DA2 party combo? Anders, Fenris and Isabella 

Did you give Fenris back to Danarius? I doubt I will 

Favorite main-story quest from DA:I? ooooOOOOOOOOH LET’S SEE, anything about the elves makes my heart pound faster. I LOVED the Here Lies the Abyss!!! 

Favorite DA:I place? Anything elf-like. Really. It’s where I was happy

Did your Inquisitor choose the Mages or the Templars? Mages

Which did you leave behind (Abyss)? Hawke. Here’s why: Anders died and I wanted him to join him in Andraste’s bosom. Besides, Strout had to restore the Wardens. 

Inquisitor’s feelings on being the Herald of Andraste? They don’t believe in it, but if the people want to, then what can they do? (aside from denying it every time)

What are your feelings on the Chantry? I’m going to skip this one sorry

What are your feelings on the Circle? Needs retirement tbh

DLC for the first 2 games: All of it, some of it, or none of it? All of them I guess? 

Favorite DLC mission overall? from the first game? I’ve only played the Shale one so I’ll go with that one, besides I love her  from da:I I loved the last part of JoH, but I’m sure Trespasser will kill me 

Favorite DA character overall? wHY.  DA:O - Alistair, Morrigan, Shale, Zevran, Barkspawn  DA2 - Anders, Merril, Isabella, Varric, Sebastian for the looks (I’m sorry I don’t know him yet), sometimes Fenris DA:I - Cullen, Samson, Solas, Bull, Sera, Harding, Cassandra, Ameridan, Dorian, Nug King, I’m pretty sure I’m forgetting someone 

Least favorite character? DA:O - Howe DA2 - hmm?  DA:I - eh

Who do you want to see return in the next game? Zevran. For sure. 

What kind of DLC do you hope for for DA4 (heh)? something about the return of the Warden?

Bloodmagic: yes or no? it’s a yay for me, my Mahariel is a bloodmage.  Again, it’s a type of magic that depends on how you use it. 

Funniest moment in the games? for starters, when you go talk to your companions on Trespasser? I cry.  The avvar-goat-situation.  The Bull x Quizzy x companions moment (yes, that one) I...can’t remember anything else

Creepiest moment in the games? BROODMOTHER 

A moment/action you regret in-game? Sentencing that stupid dude to tranquility in Inquisition. KINDA goes against what Mahariel is, BUT it’s still in character but eeh 

Who did you romance in your first playthrough for each game? DA:O - Alistair DA2 - was going for Fenris but ended up Anders DA:I - Cullen

Who do you wish you could romance that you can’t? SAMSON AND KREM 

Favorite romance overall so far? Alistair and Cullen. Dorian and Bull next. 

One romance you just can’t stand/doesn’t make sense/etc? none. Everything makes sense so shush

Which 3 DA characters would you want as your best friends? Krem, hmmmm I guess Bull and I DUNNO Anders because we could talk about cats 

A character you’d love to drop in a volcano and forget about? Solas (I kid, I love you my egg nug) the BROODMOTHER 

Best antagonist in the series? Coryphallus

Worst antagonist in the series? Howe. Annoying prick 

Something you do in EVERY DA playthrough, no matter what? ............romance the cute dork????????????

Describe your perfect playthrough for any DA game. Ay mate, I don’t know, I like the way things are eXCEPT, give us poly romances plz

Favorite Warden/Hawke/Inquisitor headcanons (any or all)? oH BOY HERE WE GO My Lavellan\Mahariel is in a poly relationship with Cullen and Samson :B  My Lavellan\Mahariel actually started on Origins, as a fake warden, went to DA2 and ended up helping Anders blow up the chantry and then went to the inquisition to help with Corypoopalus

Favorite non-Player Character headcanons? Samson redeems himself and continues to help mages in a legal safe way ;U; 

That One Headcanon that hurts to think about? @weirdsal ‘s Qunari dying

Fluffiest headcanon ever? OK SO HEAR ME OUT, Cullen is dozing off on a bed and Samson goes in for the cuddles and after Mahariel goes for the extra cuddles and it ends up in a pile of limbs and love and everyone is happy and they have a Mabari called Pepper

Your non-Player Character OTPs? Krem x anyone that makes him feel happy

Your absolutely NOTP? I don’t know? 

Who would you date if you could (as you, not your OC)? bweheheheh I DON’T REALLY KNOW??? Cullen

Who has the best character arc overall? hmMMM Samson

Who was written really poorly? good question, I have no idea 

Who do you wish had been given more story? Samson :B 

Favorite NPC? ..........guess

A character you think deserves more fan love? SAMSON 

Best story moment? I’ll come back to this one 

Favorite achievement? FIRST KNIGHT 

Any epic game play moments in any DA game? the end of Here Lies the Abyss 0:

Something you hate about any/all of the games? why are mages so much weaker than the others! 

Best non-OC quote? “I myself never had the pleeeaaaasssaaah”

Have you cosplayed any DA characters? I wish 

Who would you cosplay if you could (no holds barred)? Cullen, any Warden, Samson? 

Did you read the comics? nope

Did you read the novels? trying to get my hands on those 

Did you see Dawn of the Seeker? nap

Favorite OST song(s)? The themes and Tavern songs 

Do you take screenshots in any DA games? fuck yes? 

Do you edit images/gifs or make videos about DA? sometimes I put flower crowns on them yes

Have you ever made a DA Let’s Play? nay

What moment/memory still gives you chills/feels? that Warden Killing the dragon while reciting the Warden’s motto thing 

What are you hoping for from DA4? SAMSON, also some body-mod and maybe better hair. ZEVRAN 

What are you worried about for DA4? my laptop not running it? 

Favorite fanmix? ay mate

Favorite fanfic? I’ve only read one AND IT DESTROYED ME SO I’LL NEVER READ ANYMORE 

Favorite fanart/fanartist? @nipuni that’s for sure , @janearts 

Favorite fan musician/music? labadiii labadaaaa

Favorite cosplay(er)? :B

Favorite Let’s Play? :BBBBBBBBBB

Favorite DA-themed blog? :BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

Do you create anything in the fandom (write, draw, craft, gif, etc)? I draw

Do you participate in or run a DA RP? nope

Are you on any DA forums, chats, reddit subs, etc? nay nay 

Do you run an DA-themed blog/page/website? my blog is 95% DA, does that count? 

Do you have any friends who love DA too? I sure do

Did you get someone into DA? Yes

Do you own any DA merchandise? the artbooks and the playing cards

Have you ever made any DA-themed crafts (clothes, toys, etc)? no but I want ;_; 

Which actors would you cast for a movie of your fav DA game? DUD ok, Cate Blanchett as Morrigan, I’m sorry

Do you use game mods? nay

What’s your favorite DA mod? that Cullen with stubble and messy hair makes my pants drop

If you could be any non-Human DA species, which and why? Elves, because they are amazing and I love everything elf related 

Where would you live (Fereldan, Orlais, Free Marches etc?) eish, I have no idea mate 

Circle, Templar, Chantry, Guard, Seeker, Inquisition, or none? Inquisition

If you could meet your Warden/Hawke/Inquisitor, what would you say? Warden: Marry me Hawke: Marry me Inquisitor: Marry me

#oooooooh boy #dragon age 101 questions #I was bored