#she dont hate them and she knows what she’s doing nnnnn

[kiaracarera]

“madison hates jiara” oh really?

#jiara #she dont hate them and she knows what she’s doing nnnnn #outer banks #madison bailey #*

[tomdiddlyumptious]

Can u do a Tom Holland x black reader

Where there relationship has been secret for a while and reader confronts him while there with the ffh cast at a get together and they have a huge argument in front of everyone and reader starts to think he wants to keep her a secret because of what she looks like . Ending in fluff

YES. BTW IF ANYONE ELSE HAS REQUESTS THROW THEM AT ME I NEED TO MAKE IT UP TO UU GUYS🥺

Summary: huh-

Warnings: uhhhh- a dick thomas and a faking it andddd- NOW NOW NOW NANANANA NOW YÆS- jk fluff

A/n: AYO CHILL WITH THE FOLLOWS-AHHHH I LYSMMMMMMMM-

You wanted to not care, you wanted to act like your feelings weren’t hurt- but it wasn’t true, it wasn’t fair. You sigh and laid in bed with him thinking about everything you gave to him, everything you’ve done for him.....but he can’t even take you outside? What the fuck, no really. What the actual fuck.

Your blood boiled on the inside out, just looking at him clouded your mind with all these negative thoughts. You didn’t want it to happen but you couldn’t help it, and since you refused to shed a tear your head was pounding and lips slightly chapped. Hearing his moan made you jump a bit, turning your back to him as you acted sleep. “Y/n?” He whispered, turning enough to look at you and smiled, leaning over to kiss up your arm all the way to your cheek as he took his hand to rub your waist. “Y/n wake up, I wanna make you coffee” he chuckled, biting your ear before kissing it. You opened your eyes and tried best not to laugh, just something about getting caught always made you giggle.

“Hmm?” You let out when he pressed a kiss to your lips, “I wanna make you coffee” you smacked your lips and laid back down “Thomas I’m still tired” lie, you just wanted time to yourself to think about what your gonna do. “Pleaseeeee y/nnnnn!” He shook you and you groaned “fine” he smiled and bit your revealed shoulder making you squeal and try to wiggle him away leaving him laughing at you before he stood up and walked to the kitchen.

“Soooooo” he tried to ease the sudden tension sitting at the table, looking at you drinking the coffee. “Yes?” You looked up at him, placing the mug down. “Uh, I don’t know....just wanted to speak to you ya know?” “Nah I don’t” you shook your head and he furrowed his eyebrows at the mean comment, wondering what went wrong, but he knew better to bother you or else you’d go off the chain. “Zendaya wants to see you” Tom smiled, putting his hands in his lap and rubbing them together while he looked away from you. “Really?” You asked.

It was like a child and their independent, self centering father were talking....the silence loud and the father barely even caring...or at least that’s what it looked like. “Yeah, and so does Jacob, haz, Laura and tony” he cheered up, excited to see you happy. “When?” You grinned as he chuckled, “today, we have to go for lunch” he moved his chair closer to you and pressed a kiss on your forehead before holding your hand. “I love you so much, y/n” it wasn’t the first time he said that, but when he did it sent you unplesant chills as the angel and devil on your shoulders agrued.

‘If he were to love you then he would show you off’ ‘y/n no, he might be scared to’ ‘what is there to be so fücking afraid of, listen to me’ ‘stay positive! You both are gonna get there’ ‘you’ve been dating for multiple months, it’s not even fücking dating it’s like a fling at this point, just a longggg fling-‘

You cut them both out and looked at him “I-I” you choked. “Don’t worry you don’t have to say it, I already know you do” he chuckled.

‘What a cocky bitch’ ‘he just said he loves you!’ ‘He’s laughing at you because you can’t say three simple words’ ‘he’s not pressuring you into doing anything, listen to me!’ ‘You’ve been getting negative signs every single months, it’s time to fucking move on’ ‘just give him another chance! He can change!’ ‘He won’t y/n, he wont’

You didn’t know how to stick to, your angel couldn’t fight anymore because the your devil kept pointing out the larger things and storing up the pot, you chose angel this time and decided to give him one more single chance, after that it’s done. You know your worth.

You smiled up at him and put a kiss to his lips thanking him “it’s no problem princess”

After that whole shannanagin you washed the dishes and took another nap on the couch this time, you wanted to watch Disney+. Tommy woke you up and told you to get ready so you did, just something comfy like sweats and an oversized hoodie with some uggs, he wore jeans and a sweatshirt per usual. “You ready?” He asked watching you when you looked up and nodded, he smile and held his hand out for you to take and you put it there.

‘He’s using you!’ ‘He’s being nice!’

You told your conscious to shut up mentally and then poof they left, the ride was silent and playing some random songs that you couldn’t catch while he tapped his fingers on the wheel.

Once you came in the small quiet restaurant you all sat around the table saying hi to each other, tom sat next to you on the right and on the left was the boys while the rest of the girls sat across from you. Food was ordered and you all were chatting “sooo I see that you two are hanging out a whole bunch...what’s goin on?” Zendaya said. You looked at Thomas “no we aren’t together” he laughed “she’s a friend”

That hit so deep. To deep. You only nodded your head and filled your cheeks with air, Tom looked at you with a smile, his eyes happy too. “Yeah just friends!” You agree, “right” he said after, you released the air in your cheeks and bit the side of your lip. “Cool” Zendaya smiled and looked down at her plate.

Everything was normal for everyone else except you, the small people on your shoulders appearing.

‘I told youuuuu’ ‘y/n I never thought that I could agree with him’ your angel pointed to your devil ‘but I do, whatever needs to come it has to’ the devil perked up to the words, standing and walking to your ear before whispering all the things he’s done.

As you mind cakes up your eyes flare and nostrils perk and jitter, “I have to use the bathroom” you looked at Tom and he only shrugged but noticing the look in your eye he could tell somethings wrong. You stood and walked in the bathroom, your hands shook as you sat ontop of the counter, taking time to yourself to try and calm down but that’s all that you could think about. Trying to be respectful as possible.

Tom pretended to walk inside the men’s bathroom but instead came into the woman’s, seeing you stare at your hands. “Y/n?” He tried to be gentle. “What the fuck do you want, Thomas?” You looked up at him. “What-“ “get out” “tell me what’s wrong” he stepped in and the bathroom door closed by it’s self. “what’s wrong? We aren’t dating so what does that matter? Leave me alone” “I’m not leaving you a fücking lone, you need to get your act together so you can sit down with your fucking friends” he said sternly.

“What am I? Your fucking pet? Child? No the fuck I’m not!” You stood, walking over slowly. “I’ve tried my fücking best to ignore it, to suck it up, to hide it, but you fucking enrage me SO MUCH that I can’t help it!” “Shut up y/n your being to loud” “IM BEING TO LOUD? HERE ILL BE MORE FUCKING QUIETER!” You raised your voice louder.

Everyone’s eyebrows furrowed as they could hear your screams.

As you got closer he backed up more. “Y/n please-“ “what thomas? You dont wanna let everyone know what a fucking bitch you are? The fact that you LIE TO EVERYONE about our relationship”

At this point you were so blinded you didnt notice that you were infront of everyone.

“Why do you hide me away?” You genuinely asked, and suddenlyyou were crashed by a sudden rush of anxiety. “is it because i dont look like your past exes?” He was backed up against the table as you stopped right infront him, your eyes started to water as he didnt reply.

“Y/n i-“ zendaya harrison and jacob looked at tom too, it was clear what the problem was and zendaya was getting kinda mad and was waiting for an answer.

“Thomas” you begged and he had nothing, he said.... nothing.

Tears fell down his cheek as he watched you sniffle and rub your nose, grabbing your bag and running out.

Everyone watched him in silence as he leaned back into the table “excuse me” the lady gently said, tom noticed it wasnt his table so he only walked out of the store and waited outside.

He watched as you pulled out of the car but he didnt even feel like trying to make you come back, you do need to have some time to yourself.

“Fuck” he let out, wondering why he didnt say anything nor do anything. Harrison walked outside and sat next to him.

“Why?” He asked and tom looked at him. “I dont know i just felt like- i felt like my fans were gonna hurt her” “but you did” harrison pointed at tom “you didnt even give a chance and she stuck by your side for how long?” Tom told away and as he speaked he noticed how much of a dick he was......is.

You cried in the bed while you had your things out, getting ready to pack them up as you could barely breathe choking ob your sobs.

What did i do wrong? What did i do to deserve this? Should i change?

All these things running through your head and distracting yourself from putting your stuff up.

You ened up crying your ass off, crying it longer then the months that youve both been together, its all that you could think about honestly.

So when he came home you didn’t even notice your head hurt and your eyes stung, cuddling the pillow while your clothes were on the floor.

He hated seeing you like this, it made him cry and something he couldnt suck up, so when he saw you hurt and hearing your weeps it instantly hit him and made him come over and sit on the end of the bed, uncontrollable tears falling down his cheeks while he let out matching sobs.

You sat up and saw him, your eyes drying as they filled with hatred you stood and walked but tom beat you to the door, shutting it and locking it behind you.

You pointed to the door silently asking him to let you out but he shook his head refusing to. You walked up to him and tried to take his hand to pull him out the way but instead he forced his arms around your neck to hug you.

“Get off of me!” You yelled muffled. “No” he simply said, kissing your head as tears continued falling down his cheeks. “Get off- please get off!” You tried pushing him but he wouldnt budge.

“You can hit me, push me, whatever you want but im not letting you go” he gripped tighter speaking into your hair. “Fuck you” you muttered and he replied with a ‘i know’.

You both sat in silence all day and he was still hugging you but you didnt hug back until you calmed down, sobbing into his chest. “Y/n, you’re the one i want, you’re the one i need. So im begging you please... just dont leave me” he whispered starring at wall, his fingers touching your hair and trying to sooth you.

“Im scared your gonna leave me tom” you look up at him with your chin on his chest. He looker back at you “i cant even think of it, darling” he rubbed away your tears “but why-“ “i was scared” “what is there to be so afraid of?” “My fans are terrible... at least the 12 year olds” he chuckled “im scared they wont see the same beauty i see in my eyes, id rather keep you to myself then share you with this cruel world”

He reached down and kissed your forehead. “But youve been doing it for so long and-“ you sighed “i didnt feel like it was that long, you made me feel like-like you took it away. Like i could spend forever with you and it woukd seem like it was just an hour or so”

You gave him a weak smile and he returned it, reaching to meet his lips you did, the kiss salty from the shared tears but no one was complaining, you both laid in the bed and he cuddled right behind you, while you were sleep he took a picture and posted it with the caption ‘couldnt ever ask for anything better, love you y/n’

After that he shut off his phone and returned to your side and pressed a kiss on your neck before falling asleep, safe and sound.

#tom holland x reader #tom holland #tom holland fanfic #tom holland x black!reader #tom holland imagine #tom holland fic #tom holland au #tom holland blurb

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for dating Natasha Romanoff

Natasha Romanoff x reader

warnings: knife/gun/violence/death mentions

a/n: ILY EM

prompt: @the-radio-star: “wait ok can i request headcanons for dating natasha romanoff?! I saw you were looking for more natasha requests :D”

you were a SHIELD agent and clint’s partner sent to take nat down

you were desperate to finish this mission but thank goodness clint was there to stop you

“y/n, we’ve gotta give her a chance. she deserves it”

“clint, we have a mission to complete”

he apprehended her, disobeying the shoot-to-kill order, which you were upset about at first

but natasha didn’t seem as heartless as they said she was

“i can tell you want me dead. it’s okay, lots of people do”

“just following orders”

“so was i”

clint and you were assigned to her by nick fury himself, helping “the black widow” out of the rogue assassin role and into a domestic assasin <3

you began to warm up go natasha, though, which surprised you a lot

clint ended up taking off to be with his family for a while, so it was just you and her

nat and you learned a lot about each other (as a trust exercise)

“well, uh, have you had any pets, ms. romanoff?”

“i have not had any pets. but there was a rat living underneath my bed when i was younger”

“oh”

time actually slipped right past the two of you, as you ended up talking all night

“what time is it?”

“um...oh, it’s four a.m.”

“really? we’ve been talking all this time?”

as time went on, she began flirting less and less subtly

you weren’t opposed to it

it was obvious to clint

you and nat got sent on your first mission together to prove she was loyal to SHIELD and she ended up taking a bullet for you

you thought she was going to die, you couldn’t stop freaking out

but she was amused by your concern

“are you like this with all the agents or just me?”

kissing her just to get her to stop making fun of you

“i’m gonna say you only do this with me? i sure hope so”

fury knew this shit was gonna happen, actually he was planning on it

“you two make a great team, no doubt will you be an amazing couple”

the agents have been shipping yall since the beginning

you were already close with clint’s family, but now natasha was getting the chance to meet them!

“daddy, who’s that girl with the red hair?”

“that’s y/n’s girlfriend, lila! her name is natasha”

“aunt natasha!”

more missions with natasha because you do great together

unspoken movements that flow together so well

when she’s away on her own, she calls you (or messages you) every night to tell you about her day and how stupid her target is

easy peasy

the avengers initiative was activated and you were apart of it, along with nat

so now you guys were a mf power couple

nat was totally soft on you compared to everyone else dhshshha

they were stunned

“loveeee youuuuu, y/nnnnn”

the hand holding mhm yes

tony poking fun at your relationship

“say that again and i’ll cut your eyes out, stark”

“nat, please, no. knife away”

thor thinks your relationship is adorable

and he’s so genuine about it!!

“you two fight your battles together! such a strong bond that cannot be broken! i wish the two of you nothing but happiness!”

nat is a cuddler i swear

if she’s not cuddling you she has to cuddle a pillow so she hates being away from you

making jokes about “engagement firearms”

“be serious, nat, if i proposed to you with a pistol would you still say yes?”

“y/n, if you handed me an old shoe and asked me to marry you i’d probably still say yes”

constantly looking out for each other

she likes to lay on your lap

“i thought you were the black widow, not the black cat”

getting her some of her favorite food :)

nat loves wendy’s

you make jokes abt how she should be wendy for halloween dhahahhah

ahhhh she loves you so much its so cute

especially bc of the minor ways she shows affection, you know its for real

like she’ll walk up behind you and wrap her arms around your waist and put her chin on your shoulder and hum

you love hearingher tell you she loves you in russian

its the sweetest thing

she grabs your hand and puts it on her head so that you’ll play with her hair

because SERIOUSLY SHE LOOOOOVES PHYSICAL AFFECTION SHE NEEDS IT

you make her feel all tingly inside!!

“babe you’re the best thing that’s ever happen to me”

she’s a spy and you know she has to play another “character” but when she was on the run from HYDRA she kissed steve and he STILL cant look you in the eye because he feels bad no matter how many times you tell him that it’s not a big deal and literally they were trying to throw off bad guys its FINE

“im sorry, y/n”

“steve you’ve never done a thing wrong its OKAY”

you know she’s capable of taking care of hereee but you are always so terrified whenever nat’s in the slightest bit of trouble

you’re prepared to die for/with her

“think it’ll be okay”

“as long as im next to you”

going on the run with her after all the bad blood between tony and steve

it was like a very long and stressful vacation

but there was something undeniably romantic about sharing a shitty hotel with a loved one

“want to order some pizza and watch friends?”

“of course”

she loves adding an element of domesticity to her life

but it always feels weird to her

fighting thanos together what terrifying, you wouldnt gave anything tonsee that she was safe after this

thankfully both of you lived

“nat, are you okay?!”

“yeah, im okay. dont worry”

spending the next 5 years together at the avengers compound and just keeping each other afloat through it all

“can you give me a kiss before i start crying again”

“i’ll give you as many as you want”

helping her distract herself through it all

“i dont know what i did to deserve you, y/n”

when there was some hope, you guys took a leap of faith to save the other half of the population

“see you in a minute”

“you can count on it, love you”

(i dont wanna go any further i might cry shahhaha)

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @allthecreativeonesaretaken // @frostedgiant // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual //

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff #black widow imagine #black widow x reader #black widow #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #avengers #avengers imagine #avengers x reader

[ts-akhmim]

Episode 3 | “It does not look good for our tribe. Honestly, we suck... Really bad. ” - Duncan

The way I absolutely flopped at that puzzle… this is why I’m a Beauty cause a sis ain’t smart to complete a puzzle and I’m not brawn-y enough to do well in a challenge hgjfdk BUT that being said, Hagthor beat the thots and apiss and I couldn’t be any happier! I do wish Brawn lost over Brain but yknow, you can’t have everything go your way (‘: it’s funny how I slayed the last challenge and flopped this one tho like a bitch really lacks consistency huh ghfjndmks

Heading into a second tribal council, there is becoming less and less room to hide. I am struggling to hold my own against the other tribes when it comes to competitions, but thank goodness it's a numbers game. If everything goes accordingly, I am taking a backseat this vote and allowing a 4-2 vote out when it comes to Trace. I appreciated Duncan coming to me with the alliance chat information with him/Scott/Trace/Isaac, but didn't like how Autumn needed to tell me first. Shows that I really can't trust Scott/Duncan after a swap comes up. In regards to Scott, he outright didn't say anything. I like him and all, but it was a slimy move to say the least. He only said something because he HAD to vote out someone in one of his two alliances. This group will be dumb as hell if they let me swap. I'll flip on them as soon as possible and invite anyone into my alliance. The tribe swap is where I made my 'Slithers' game infamous last time, so I'm hoping for a similar output. Don't forget: I swapped with the minority last time in Guyana (shout out to Jess), so I'm not worried about the numbers and how its split. ALL I NEED IS A SWAP OR TWIST. GET ME OUT OF HERE. 

Wow we’re really flopping this challenge huh! I really hate this as a group challenge bc we wasted so much time believing in an algorithm that doesn’t even work! 

okay so i again filmed a video confessional while walking the dog which i WILL eventually upload i promise hosts BUT. this challenge was literally torture, staring at the excel spreadsheet was so draining. TJ did so much work for it so I really really hope we win he is so sweet i was real mean to him at the start for truly no reason NNN i really really want the beauty tribe to go to to tribal, or the brains lot again i guess? i dont really wanna go to tribal even though i think Liam M is the easy vote? i'd rather not. i just feel really drained after that challenge i wish this confessional was even a little bit exciting im sorry hosts

i feel like i underappreciated dan as an ally?! the more i talk to him its like hmmm we vibe and we have similar energy? like i get very different but good energies from all of dan, jake and jordan! which i love, like i feel really good about them all. like what's reassuring about dan (and this sounds weird) is he feels fine complaining about others to me in pms? like jake does the same and that makes me feel really reassured trust wise - like i would never talk negatively about another player to someone i distrusted tbh... so i feel really good about that! i feel like particularly in a maybe swap i'll really bond with whoever i get to swap with even MORE. idk i just feel good about this brawn tribe still i don't want to GOOO.

okay so yesterday was... eventful! i watched the sequester mini with jake which was super fun and then right after... he cracked the tomb and i decided to tell jake about my idol. have i had it since day two? yes. but i told him i found it during the mini so i wouldnt seem sus. i dont regret my decision (so far at least anyway JKASD) because a) he cracked the tomb and immediately told me b) i think he is loyal and particularly since i told him i can and will idol him like i dont think he has incentive to leak my idol unless it comes down to lategame and he wants to blindside me but i don't see myself being able to hold onto the idol until that stage anyway! but yeah so jake knows about my idol so i'm hoping i can use it to my benefit, or to save him because i'm really invested in his success this season. maybe we are gonna be the two brawns at the end woo and tony style even tho i think i'm probs the woo nnnnn

Trace went home and that is yet another potential connection I could’ve had in the game GONE… like the Brains really wanna see me flop huh! It’s interesting that it was 4-2 vote tho like it has my overthinking self spiraling lowkey. I do really feel for the Brains having to lose twice though like I’ve been on a flop tribe before and morale is always low so my heart goes out to them and I hope they beat Brawn xoxo 

This challenge? Literal homophobia! Like I love unscrambled eggs and I want my eggs cracked by VARIOUS men but this was not what I had in mind (‘: this challenge being my alliance + AJ is interesting as well considering that AJ was the one person I haven’t established a game connection with but I do really like him. In a way, I do think him participating in this challenge is the best thing that could’ve happened to his game since it allows him to build more connections with others? That being said, Connor on the other hand… is disappointing me in a way like the king isn’t talking much or doing much. If he has personal stuff to attend to, I completely get it and he should focus on that first but I do wanna know so I don’t assume he disappeared yknow (‘: but oh well !!!

I do think me honing in on the fact that Kendall and I are two peas in a pod in this game has her really thinking that which is awesome! I do adore that girl but I gotta keep an eye out (for Selener). She did tell me that her goals this round include the following 1) Set up an alliance with us + Austin, 2) Get AJ to be our alliance’s fake 5th, and 3) Get out Adam. While I am glad she told me all of this, I’m just very cautious of her connections? Austin and I are super close and he likes her, that’s fine. My thing is with AJ because while we were calling, I did pick up on the fact that those two have played before and whatnot so who knows. I’m just a naturally stressed person so ye !!! I do really like Adam though so I hope we don’t lose at all (‘:

I hate myself for being on a call for 9 hours in this game ghjfkdls but that being said, I do genuinely love everyone on this tribe and the thought of losing makes me super emo because I feel close to every person here in one way or another. It’s a dilemma too because us winning this challenge would be ideal but if we do win and Brawn goes to tribal, the Beauty Tribe becomes public enemy number one in a swap scenario because why wouldn’t the other tribes wanna get rid of the tribe that has the most members yknow? It’s a nail-biter regardless ;-; 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1fpSJvDJxy38LcRI4MjwzIa64zT_tytXC/view?usp=sharing

So I'm not surprised that we lost AGAIN! Lowkey I feel like I did everything during this challenge so not only do I feel more defeated, but I'm annoyed that not too many people contributed. Like I have to constantly ask people how they're doing in the challenge, and they provide me with NOTHING!! And I'm tired of voting people out :/ Anyways, I feel like voting out Isaac is a dumb move for my game going forward, because Duncan/Autumn are clearly a duo. Duncan even said to me that he wouldn't mind voting out Devon if we needed too. If we don't swap next round and lose again, I have the feeling Duncan and Autumn are going to try and pit Devon and I against each other. I like to think they'd choose me over Devon since I don't have any connections to anyone. The smart move would be for them to utilize Isaac and blindside me, but I like to think they wouldn't be doing that anytime soon. I feel bad voting out Isaac because I know how much he hated being booted early in Malaysia. So to do that to him again is really sad to me. I would try to convince Devon to split up Autumn/Duncan, but he's all about the 4 going forward. Everyone is and as much as I love the 4, that type of game is boring. Idk maybe my style of gameplay is different than theirs. If I see that I'm in a sinking ship, I make sure to grab a life vest and swim to another boat. I don't sit on the boat and say "okay, time to drown now". Luckily none of them know me for the numerous times that I've flipped on alliances before. If we do swap next round, my plan is to remain loyal to whichever brain is on my tribe. However, this won't stop me from trying to make connections with people from other tribes and making new alliances. If I need to ditch my brains to solidify trust with my new tribe, then that is exactly what I am going to do. In the event that I do leave tomorrow, this game was fun! After being out of the tumblr survivor community for 3 years, I don't think I'd come back for a future org/season because the amount of stress i've been in this past week is more than I've endured with online learning since corona came to town. Idk I wouldn't be surprised if a #blindside came my way.

it's only day 7 and we havent even been to tribal yet and we STILL arent going because we won again, and im already going off the deep end like am i crackedt?? what the hell is happening on this tribe like am i the quiet one or is there just a collective quiet going on since we're just sliding through the game rn?? im not gonna lie it's kinda boring... it's getting weird.....the fact that there's an idol just looming around and someone has it and isnt telling me is making me crazy, and then to make me even more crazy i foolishly decided to sit out of the challenge today, i knew i probably wasnt gonna be good at anything with the letters all jumbled together, im just being real so i decide to spare my tribe and myself mostly the misery and sit out, i dont want to be perceived as weak completely and be voted off right now for it, but i do want to start to make sure people think im not that good at the challenges so i dont have a target going foward- also, im really just not good at the challenges. BUT apparently everyone was just like on a call together all day because of the challenge and obviously i couldnt be in it so :// my own fault! i didnt think it through completely and luckily we won, but if we hadnt, i mean... a day long on/off call is more than enough to bond over and pick a first boot from those not in it, but aj updated me on everything and at least according to him, my name wasnt mentioned and they were mostly working on the challenge and discussing white men, so that means i didnt miss much! im still working day by day on trying to water my relationships with everyone and make sure theyre ready to bloom into my little alliances once its had enough time to absorb all the sunshine i naturally radiate!! However.... others arent doing the same gorl.... like connor, literally messaged me out of the blue just to have a conversation and when i tried talking to him he stops messaging me right away ... like hello is it something i said?? i literally feel like parvati when she was going is it me?? am i being punkd??? also tried talking to kendall again today, i do enjoy her i will say she's growing on me but as of now she hasnt responded to me yet, which is ok since i never respond to anyone either oop hopefully its just not everyone vs. adam already in other news i guess a swap could be coming?? i really just dont want to be on a tribe with jakey because im not ready to dig up the hatchet from cvc lets keep it buried please!! unless he's completely forgotten that and wants to work with me and be my shield again but um... dont think he'd be up for that! im here to play a NEW game not my old one, in any case, no matter what happens i feel like as long as i have any of my fellow A name sisters- AJ, Augusto, or Amir with me, i could possibly be fine... i dont think Amir was really playing me anymore either like i did yesterday smh i think that was just a tangent of paranoia my mind created (maybe ..) 

I feel like we have to be swapping tonight like this brains tribe has lost so many challenges in a rwo, that ifit wasnt planned i feel like the hosts have to be like "put it in sis they movin" Im gonna spendthe rest of the of today working on my relationships with the rest of my brawny boys, so no if we do swap, on matter what configurations it lands on I should have options. Still dont know jac shit about the tomb and that is bothering me but thats a problem for another day.

Well, thank god that we were able to pull that challenge out. I knew if we lost it that my ass could potentially be on the line given how large of a role I played in organizing that challenge, so it would have been sad (and hella scary) to have lost that. But I do think I've shown that I can be a valuable asset to this tribe now in the event that we somehow stay in tribes for another round. I'm anticipating a tribe swap here this next round, so I kind of just need to prepare to meet some new people and hope that I'm on a tribe with some people that I've gotten along with. Ideally, I'd have Jake with me and we'd act as if we weren't that close, but I'd be happy to see basically anyone but Liam there with me. He's a great guy, but I know he doesn't trust me, I know I don't trust him, so I really don't want that to be my only lifeline on a swap tribe.

okay so in the event we swap out of the brawn tribe tonight... which would be TRAGIC i wanted to do an in memoriam of apis 1.0! TJ - i was SO rude and wrong about him! he is genuinely so sweet and lovely, and super hard working. i think he would be a good one to swap with, it would build our bond and he is a challenge workhorse! i hope he isn't mad at me for my round one confessionals, just know tj that i was WRONG and that i was the clown! Lovelis - I get really good energy from him but we also... never talk so idk where I'm getting that from? I think he is definitely going to be a casualty of the swap, I see him definitely getting picked of? Which would be sad! idk we will see Liam M - He is really sweet, but we also talk super infrequently? I feel like he trusts me which is good?! But I think he is definitely gonna go premerge unfortunately just since he isnt super active? we will see ahh Jordan - I really like Jordan i think he is great! we are working together but something about his energy has seemed... off recently? and jake has noticed the same thing and idk what to do with that it just seems off? idk i feel like we potentially are gonna drift apart as allies which would be a shame! Dan - I really love Dan, he has such good energy which I really vibe with him? I think I kind of underestimated his potential as an ally which I really regret I like him a lot tbh.. I'd like to build that trust further for sure, he just gives off such good ally energy Jake - ahh yes have left my favourite for last. ugh i love jake his energy is the best and i trust him 100% unequivocally. he knows about my idol (may've kept it a secret for two rounds but i told him eventually which is what counts jasldfkas) i want him to succeed in this game so badly, im really hopeful for him to SNAP also quickly about the brain tribal, i just hope isaac/autumn/duncan are safe. those are my only preseason connections and would kinda love to see any/all of them in a swap situation tbh i think i want that devon slithers man gone he seems sneaky (is it just because slithers sounds like a snake yes)

It’s been way too quiet around here so I’ve accepted that Duncan/Autumn/Devon/Isaac are all voting me out tonight. Devon keeps talking to me about the swap and really emphasizing about it, so I get sketch vibes from that. Plus that Duncan/Autumn duo is very strong so it makes sense for them to want to vote me out. Plus apparently Isaac is writing my name down tonight so... it’s been fun! I enjoyed my 7 days that I spent here and can’t wait for the perjury trip with Trace and Bodhi 🥳🥳🥳

Lowkey kinda bummed we won this challenge. Which probably raises a few death flags but whatever. I would have liked to put our alliance to the test before a swap :/. It also would have been neat to have the fucking idiot who voted with Trace as a spare vote, now they are definitely going to get fucked. Luckily the challenge provided some new optunity for alliances. For starters we can make a natural extra alliance with AJ without drawing conclusions to a mysterious third faction. Even though Connor did jack shit... I'm not bitter just... disappointed. :/

PERIODTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT, WE WON HOES! Like I am incredibly shook that we won because I was ready to jump off of a ledge hgfjkdl so yay for that! The Brains lost and I really do feel for them but Brawn winning makes our numbers equal and the Brawns are more threatening overall so that should mean that Brains would want to work with us in a swap scenario yknow? I’m just shook I’m on the winning tribe ghjfdks

Now that we won, I SHOULD be chilling right? Well, I hate myself so I’m not doing that one bit. I am deathly afraid of a swap next round because the makings of a swap are all there (a flop tribe that needs a swap to save them, us being at 18 people is perfect for 3 tribes of 3, etc). I’m scared I will get swap fucked in some capacity so I’m just aaaa. That being said, I do want to make sure I leave on amazing terms with everyone before we swap in case I am separated from anyone or I join some of these legends on a new tribe. 

honestly, our tribe has been pretty much on a high. our most recent challenge seemed like something tailored for us to lose, and while i was nervous for a second, we were able to best the brains tribe and send them to tribal for the THIRD time. (i really thought they'd have that one in the bag!) i feel sorry for those nerds, they just can't catch a break :( but seriously, the challenge itself really opened doors of opportunity for me in the game i feel. me/kendall/amir/augusto were on call from 11AM est to the time challenge results went up.. and it was an experience. we all got along pretty well and put our braincells together to get through that challenge, but their company was what made it worthwhile! connor was also participating in the challenge, but he didn't really do anything. although i know he's been pretty busy lately so i'm not too bent about it and completely understand, just wish he said a little more in the chat other than the two messages he did! i think what i'm preparing for right now is the swap. i really wanna cement solid relationships and allegiances with the people on my tribe as we anticipate going into bigger tribes as of next round or the round after. i wouldn't mind just staying on this tribe, though. our dynamic is great, the people are great, and we're even better in competition. there's really not much of a loss there if you ask me! 

So in the past 24 hours I've worked my ass off to try to get Autumn and Devon to vote with me against Scott and/or Duncan and I'm not getting my hopes up. Like everything they've given me has been so vague and I've tried to go the extra mile to try to get Autumn and Devon to trust me. I think I'm going home tonight and if I do that's tragic but not exactly a #blindside. It might be my curtain call but I hope I at least made them doubt each other. 

Also #FuckThoth, Jess rigged me out

Me waiting for tribal to happen: https://66.media.tumblr.com/c327b3a59ef66f9835241d079c1fbe39/tumblr_n20f10EtZH1rkuhmio2_400.gif

Me if I make it out alive tonight: https://media1.tenor.com/images/664df9da1de6fb8913ff67b2ca8234e0/tenor.gif?itemid=16269462

 Me if I get voted out tonight: https://media.giphy.com/media/aUW1R5qccvQ3K/giphy.gif

I HATE IT HERE I WANNA GO HOME!!! I feel like the underpaid babysitter that the parents forgot about cause these boys are triiippppinng. I’m selling the vote so well to Isaac I actually wanted to vote Scott with him and I was going to but my damn alliance has him secondguessing and now everyone is all misty eyed about being split while Isaac is panicking so the solution is a CALL. Even though we call EVERYDAY so there ain’t shit to talk about??? Isaac has been blowing my pm’s up all day so no sir, no farewell calls. My emotional energy has been spent for the day lying for 6 hours straight thank you very much. Scuncan and Devon need to cut the melodrama out cause we have a whole game left?? So we will see each other again??? And if we don’t, we don’t. Also we could not get swapped tonight??? So simmer down. The Lord NEEDS to take me cause I can’t do it. Everyone needs their hand held and their feelings coddled and I’m tired. Less  kumbayah, more playing Survivor 

So we won again! I felt terrible in our challenge chat because I really couldn't get my head around the patterns and shit everyone else was doing, honestly hope they don't see general weakness in me because of it.. I'm good at like, everything else, but I dunno, this season's just not been looking favourably on me yet. After the flag incident and then that challenge, I feel like I probably am in the most danger, and I still don't know what to do about it except spam everyone all the time in hopes they feel some social tie to me... I hate it here I rly do. Hopefully we'll start to get more comps I can excel in because so far it's been flop after flop and I rly hate to see it.

Not AJ telling me that I am the person he is closest to on this tribe… I’m crying ugh, I feel so bad for wanting him to leave first like I didn’t get to know him well until recently but I really do like him… why was I blessed with these iconic people on my tribe? Game aside, I do like them all and want them to slay in life <3

I'm so screwed if I don't win this immunity challenge. I know I'm a weak link, so if I don't win this, hopefully *dan* doesn't either cause I might have to target him to save my skin. This is where I'm really gonna have to be social over the next day, cause my ass is quite literally on the line right now. I'm not getting 18th-16th, screw this.

Okay I’m gonna say it, I love my alliance so much.I will not play with my heart and I’ll kill them if I have to but I really really really don’t want to, I obvi love my alliance with Augusto, Kendall, and Connor so much, but i will not play with my heart and ill backstab them if i have to but i really really dont want to. I would also like if adam austin and aj were safe. I really really like adam a lot. he is a fking sweetheart, and hes so funny. Austin is also great and super genuine and kind. i feel bad for calling him boring earlier, and aj is just funny and cool in general. the best case is we never have to go to tribal and i get to keep my inbred nocturnal intoxicated-at-all-times tribe members here. I am gonna need as many of these people in the game as possible for the swap and for the merge, and if we end up do having to go to tribal, I will do everything in my power to keep the tribe from getting divided, because we're gonna need each other to take down the brawn tribe.

I want to be tight with every single one of the beauties because a swap is likely coming and I need them, and the biggest issue rn I see moving foreward is if brawn and brain align, so we must snatch the brains first. every one keeps talking about being stumped about the tomb and I just keep lying DKNDKDNDD but I am lowkey scared they know I’m lying 

#BackWithVengeance

[isaacathom]

i guess my issue with hsk is that i think phos is an idiot

‘the seas off limits but im no use anyway’ PHOS YOURE PRIZED BY THE LUNARIANS CAN YOU LOOK AFTER YOURSELF FOR /ONCE/

also how come they let her hang out on her own in the fields all the time. i thought the whole deal was that shes super prized and thats not allowed?? like the first ep even opened with her asleep in a field like if fuckkkinnnn pink haired gem hadnt come to tell her to wake up at that moment she wouldve been captured??? who is letting this happen. phos has an overt death wish

is this for fan service. oh yea that definitely is like for starters they arent showing uh euclase (?) chest but we’re seeing ass a lot, alrighty homie, gotta pay bills i guess

it is really dumb though because like.... i can /almost/ relate to phos but im also a perfectionist asshole who hates this disappoint soooo the idea of being set a task and then doing absolutely fucking nothing just nnnnn nope! antithesis to my stupid being! cant do it.

‘does sensei realise how long the hill will take’ ITD TAKE LESS TIME IF YOU /STARTED/ and also if you got your fucking book back from Cinnabar which you /still havent done/ you havent even mentioned it and you lost it in the first fucking episodeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

you dont have to go IN you could just fucking dump the snail in the ocean. god dammit. i already know this ends poorly. fuck. even if i couldnt read signals that are blaring like fuck. god phos straight up has a death wish.

also cinnabars got main billing next to phos and shes only shown up in lke two fucking episodes......... excuse me???? excuse??? hello???? where is she????

is phos not looking at this being going ‘huh thats awful similar to a lunarian’ hpdo

‘praise be to them’ you fucking. what the fuck. the fan service comes in /spades/ now. you really gotta pay those bills.

like King is nice and they are saying a lot for someone who is here exclusively to lure Phos into a lunarian trap but maybe the idea is that Phos wont be able to relay any of this ANYWAY, so why not divulge?

oh god ammit.

#houseki no kuni blogging #houseki no kuni spoilers

[survivormarmoreal]

Episode #14: "i literally hate attention (i say as i broke out into song unprompted)” - Bryce

I can't believe that I am here. I made it to the Final 4. It is very crazy. I thought that I was toast in the Final 6. So to be here now is very exciting and shocking. The final 3 is going to depend on who wins immunity. I am really hoping that I could win this immunity to secure my spot in the final 3. If not then I hope that Matt doesn't win it. He needs to be an option just in case. I'm very nervous. I just finished my rites of passage. and its crazy that its almost final tribal.

so im getting 4th. FJKASDHFKJh this comp is so hard and like im literally not gonna be able to do endurance so i need to do well on the other stuff but i just dont see that happening... like this puzzle first try was 70 minutes FJKASDHFKAJS. AND I KNOW COUNTING WILL MESS ME UP BC IM NERVOUS WRECK i didnt even mean to caps that but its tea. like flash game i think when i played this once before i wasnt bad but maybe i was who knows. im so emo like no one is talking to me anymore FKJASHDFKJ like i guess bc its just 1 vote left they dont wanna pretend they wont cut me FJAKSDFH like my game not even that good im gonna get dragged by sharky/nathan/keaton/nicole/ everyone but brian... maybe even brian who knows NNNN. my nnn. is so iconic.. maynor who?. idk like ok so if i win immunity (which i wont) idek what to do like i feel like voting matt is the best option maybe. bc i WONT be voting maynor bc i love him (not that i dont love anna and matt) but i just feel like we've had the best relationship of the f4 and im confident that the jury will like my game more than his (maybe they wont tho... i say confident but i mean 2% (not skim) sure they will) but ok so annabelle prob is hated by jury at least from brian and maybe even sharky? but like she didnt play bad she literally made most iconic move at f6 and i respect that but idk if jurors do like ppl keep saying shes a goat  so maybe she has no chance. and then theres matt where like ppl cant be mad he voted them when everyone and their mom in this game has voted him ASDKJFHASDKJ. like so hes prob liked by jury but i just dont know if hes done anything to deserve to win. he found 2 idols successfully played 1 but that was more on anna/nicks weird sense of leaking when it didnt really benefit them.  but like ok he was least threatening member of trio who got to the end so underdog edit is there even tho he literally wasnt underdog tbh u know who was an underdog... ME. i had NO ONE but nathan for a lil.. then dennis... then he got ROBBED. so then i had brian... but he got ROBBED. and now i have maynor like ive literally flipped and flopped to better my game and idk like i am physically able to meaningfully say ive done anything good ever in life or orgs but like i didnt do too bad i think! KJFAHSDKJF... idk maybe im getting 0 votes 3rd place no matter what and if thats the case im still so happy bc ive had a lot of fun in this game and met some true friends (and keaton) but like im getting 4th anyway so doesnt matter! ugh that sounds like a final goodbye confession but i know me and im gonna confess like 10 more times before this round is over so if i do get 4th/3rd just know that this was my true end...

So like.... I do not think i'm winning immunity. like at all. which makes me pretty nervous ngl. I really want to be there at the finale cause i think I have a good shot. If Bryce loses, i'm fairly sure i'm good to get to FTC but otherwise im scared. Making FTC would be really good for me cause I think i can out argue Maynor and Annabelle fairly well, but otherwise with bryce there idk. So like, BRYCE CAN'T WIN IMMUNITY. Also this FIC is disgusting like no thanks. I've already fucked up the 2 live ones so uh ya am annoyed :(. woo final juror here i come!

Bryce won immunity. Im glad. I wouldnt want to be in the position to vote Bryce. I had to abstained from the counting part cuz it triggered my anxiety. I tried tho but i couldnt. This vote is going to be said. Matt is going to go 4th. And i feel really bad. We got to know each other more during every tribal. This really sucks. I just dont want to give him false hope where there isnt any. Im going to help tomorrow.

I am so getting final juror. fuck. i knew it would happen if bryce won immunity and it fucking is. I am so sad about this. I have worked so hard all game to get here and its just being tossed away like that. I am SO sad. I have fucked up my sleep schedule for this game and now its getting me final juror. ugh. i just wanted to get to the end and like argue my case. but now? not happening :( i hate this

I WON I REALLY WON IMMUNITY ASKDJFHASKDJF I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA LOSE WHEN I GOT 12 POSTS ASJFKHKASJFDHASDKJF THATS SO NNNNN IM SO HAPPY BUT SO SAD BC NOW I TRIED TO TELL MATT IM VOTING HIM BC I WANT TO BE HONEST BUT HE SAYS HES TALKING TO A BRICK WALL LIKE???? SORRY FOR NOT WANTING TO GIVE U FALSE HOPE AJDSFHDKAJ its honestly so rude like ive been in that position before so i know what its like when ur pleading ur case and the person doesnt seem to care and im NOT doing that. but obvioulsy i didnt just make up a plan on what to do at f4 so obviously i have thoughts and plans and im not just gonna switch it up bc u plea to me now. idk KJASHDFKJ also im so scared im gonna lose now NNN hes saying anna played so well and tbh she kind of did maybe i lose no matter what...

So like i am leaving but its ok! why? cause i will preserve my legacy by dropping a whole ass fajita recipe here so that I can feel like i have made an IMPACT on the season. Even though like im still sad its me, im going out with a bang baby! I don't use this recipe personally ( I am a broke student) but its v.good!

Ingredients: 2 large chicken breasts, finely sliced 1 red onion, finely sliced (ready to make you cry) 1 red pepper, sliced 1 red chilli, finely sliced (optional) For the marinade 1 heaped tbsp smoked paprika 1 tbsp ground coriander pinch of ground cumin 2 medium garlic cloves, crushed 4 tbsp olive oil 1 lime juiced 4-5 drops Tabasco

Method: Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6 and wrap 6 medium tortillas in foil.

Mix 1 heaped tbsp smoked paprika, 1 tbsp ground coriander, a pinch of ground cumin, 2 crushed garlic cloves, 4 tbsp olive oil, the juice of 1 lime and 4-5 drops Tabasco together in a bowl with a big pinch each of salt and pepper.

Stir 2 finely sliced chicken breasts, 1 finely sliced red onion, 1 sliced red pepper and 1 finely sliced red chilli, if using, into the marinade.


Heat a griddle pan until smoking hot and add the chicken and marinade to the pan.

Keep everything moving over a high heat for about 5 mins using tongs until you get a nice charred effect. If your griddle pan is small you may need to do this in two batches.

To check the chicken is cooked, find the thickest part and tear in half – if any part is still raw cook until done.

Put the tortillas in the oven to heat up and serve with the cooked chicken, a bag of mixed salad and one 230g tub of fresh salsa.

hope the random person reading this uses it otherwise gj future me reading this you've officially gone insane! yeet ig?

This is going to be a sad day. I really like Matt and dont want to vote him out but its the best option from the people available. It really sucks. I feel his pain and ahh.

I’m literally going to cry. I want to help Matt. I wish we could all be final 3 but we can’t. I’m dying emotionally. Final 4 always has so much pressure cuz theres only 4 people left. I hope Matt doesn’t hate me. I hope he understands thisnis a game move because he techinically was the underdog in the beginning then was on top then back to underdog. I just hope he doesnt take it personal that I don’t think tie-ing it for him would be good for my game.

OMG IDK WHATS GONNA HAPPEN MATT GO HOME PLS BUT I FEEL LIKE ANNA IS VOTING MAYNOR IM GONNA BE SO SAD AHHHH DJSKFHSDKJF

Matt is voted out 3-1. He becomes the final juror.

ok so i had the worst day of my life today and didnt plan my speech at all so thats where im at NNN time to fake smile and hope the jurors like my ad libbed speech ASFKUHDFKJ ftc starts in 4 minutes.

well.. that was interesting adsjflhasdkfj. Like i always have 0 confidence in myself so i think im gonna lose and i really do respect the game that anna and maynor played. im just sad that i dont think i articulated myself well bc like im so bad with words anajsfhakj and ppl were saying conflicting things and its just not in me to like chime in with my pov to possible sway it in my favor bc i literally hate attention (i say as i broke out into song unprompted) but yaaa like i truly think that maybe i kind of did play super well and deserve to win but either way ill be happy bc i made *some* genuine friendships and also like had so much fun voting ppl out KFADHSKJASHK. i wish i like wrote what all my confessionals were so i could reference sth i said on day 1 but it was prob like i hate my tribe they ignore me so maybe ill just say that again FKJADSHFKJ. we love coming full circle... im so hungry i didnt eat so i will now stop typing to get dinner maybe i will write another confessional. omg wait gotta have some line thats iconic in case theres an episode title... think... love talking to myself FAKSDHFKj im so funny when i was like "i realized hey i respond to myself ill take me to the end" its such a mood KFJASDHFKJ ok but hm... ok. maybe im a snake who doesnt actually care about people and use them to my advantage to get my way but at least im not jayden. OMG jk thats so mean even tho he deserves it ALSO i was gonna like comment on keaton being like "saying the n word doesnt make u racist" but then he was kind of nice to me so i didnt.. love being as fake woke as me... not being confrontational to get a jury vote... so gross NNNN wooh idk how to end this but watch waves music video normani literally snapped so hard is being as slept on as me. omg wait... maybe im a pillow bc i sure am being slept on. iconic line.... i love the hosts so much ignore literally every cringe thing i wrote in this confessional pls FKJADSHKFJ

IM VERY DRUNK AND I DNT KNOW IF I HAD TO. BUT EITHER BRYCE OR ANNA WILL WIN CUZ IM A MES AND DONT DESERVE TO CUZ THEY WERE BOTH AMAZING FOR LETTING ME GET TO FTC. I WANNA THANK ANNA THE HOST FOR BEING AMAZING AND GREAT. I LIKED THE ALICE THEM CUZ HEART CUZ ICANT  EMOHJI, ,LOVED THIS SEASON AND UR ALL AMAZING HOSTS.

Im happy I made it to the final 3. And even though FTC was bad; I enjoyed it. I know I’m probably getting 3rd which is fine. I have so much respect to Annabelle and Bryce and everyone in the jury. I’m more excited to be able to talk to all of them again. Let’s see who is our winner will it be Bryce or Annabelle!? The hosts you guys were amazing and i had a great time this season. Im glad Jones pushed and convinced me to apply. Thank you for giving me a spot in this season. And Jones you da best. 💖💛💙

confession time. everytime i write one of these i put the day as who are u and my name as what day is it.. my mind always having to go change it. but um didnt think i would be writing another one of these FJKSADF but i have no self control and winner reveal is in 4 and a half hours and im literally sick FAKJDSk i feel so anxious and nervous like even if i lose im gonna be happy but i just really want to win also im still trying to process ppl not liking me or my gameplay and saying i played with their emotions FJKASDHFJ i had a blast. anyways this is the anthem of the day apparently https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhzN7SfnNeY

WHATS GOING ON?? IM TIRED IS WHATS GOING ON IM SO ANXIOUS! im sooo anxious i want to win. pls...

Bryce wins Celestial Marmoreal in a 4-3-0 vote!

#episode #allmadhere

[survivorsolomonislands]

Episode 2 “#NewQueenInTown” - Lily

hey hoes so ill do my first impressions or w/e chrissa- kween! i was hoping she'd stay awhile but u know when someone wants to be elimed then u gotta! dana- idk ha!hevjkbev i dont remember a dana in any of these so! idk how she plays so yikes but i wouldnt be surprised if shes close w the other newer people lexo- im love her! im hoping we can do #that for callie tru matt- i played a game with him once and he voted me out so :/ but i think we can work well together tbh mitchell- hes malaysia and thats all i know, im not sure how he played in malaysia and lowkey the only times i ever interacted with him he kinda annoyed me gtg monty- aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh i love monty, i know he will be one of my closest allies for sure! i cant wait to slay w him linus- hes from winnipeg and he seems sneaky to me and hes a newer school player so he could be close w the others ryan tiddie palmer - i love my dadt sdhvbdfv but also im a little wary of him bc i have a feeling he would love to vote me out but as of rn i need him so, we'll see zak- i voted him out in palau and thats all i got kjehfvbjr i didnt even kno they played a game before anyway hes also part of the potential new school alliance

also heres the vote tea, basically mine and lexis names were being thrown around and i was like??? we aint even do anything so then we started throwing zaks and linus name around. anyway me and mont were freaking out bc we needed 2 more people to get majority and vote zak and save me and lex, so we recruit chrissa and we make an alliance chat w ha. we call and talk about who we can pull in and such. so come the next mornin i start talkin to matt who said he was down for voting zak. honestly i trust matt he seems more trustworthy than other people plus i dont think he knows a lot of the tribe members tru so if i keep him close then my alliance should be good tru. anyway i talk to lexi to figure stuff out, and i talk to zakriah and basically tell him that im willing to vote lexi next round or w/e, mind u this is after chrissa anounces that she wants to be voted out, and well hopefully by telling him this i can gain his trust a little and get some tea from ha. also zak knows that me mont and lexi were targetting him??? honestly idk who couldve told him unless it was chrissa??? no one else shouldve known tru, anyway so i get the tea from that mitchell is the one who told him that he heard my name being thrown around and kjefbv like i dont wanna confrontational or anything but i went to mitchell and asked him about it and he was "like honestly it was like a grapevine thing tbh like nobody was like "...how bout karen" it was more of "i've heard Karen"" LIKE??????????????????????????????? REALLY BITCH THAT DONT ANSWER MY QUESTION. grapevine my ass, like thats what zak told me too, like !!!!!!!!! just tell me bc if u dont then im gonna assume that ur ass is the one started the whole "i heard" thing nnnnn anyway!!!! im just relieved that chrissa is asking to be voted out bc this couldve been way more stressful aaaaaahhhhh  honslee i was scared this was all a ploy to throw votes but i genuinely believe ha and i love chrissa too much to ever disrespect her wishes so :/ bye bye chrissa we hardly knew ye!

Not much has happened so far. We won the first challenge, which is awesome, and kinda gives me this fire to keep winning just so that we can keep beating the vets. It's kind of fun to be the underdogs (considering we all have much less experience than the vets) and to win. As long as we don't get a flash challenge, I'm not too worried about how well we do. Or at least, how well I do. I just don't want to be the person with the lowest score. Anyways, on day 2 or something Lily messages me and says we should be in an alliance, since we knew each other from a chat. So I said sure, and she gives me an idol clue she found! Holy shit! Lucky for her, I don't have any other alliances, otherwise I could so easily just play her. I don't have any plans to though - she seems very trusting and kind and I respect that. I just have to be careful it doesn't get me in trouble as long as we're aligned. So I go to search for the idol, with the clue she gave me in mind, and somehow end up finding the exact same clue she did. Hopefully we don't make the same mistake again next round.

https://youtu.be/hCcal7QtHWY

OMG okay so first off... Daisy comes to me saying she likes Jacob. Okay. Perfect. He's my ride or die anyways, so now we have a mutual ally we can lean on, and she says she wants to be in an alliance. Cool. Even better. Let's officialize this shit.

So Daisy makes the chat, and she says "alright Johnny and Jacob, let's add Willow and Luca" and I'm internally freaking out with Jacob on the side here, and Jacob and I are losing it in PMs and we're like "I think that wouldn't be the BEST idea, just because adding people late can make them think that they're going to be 4th and 5th" So Daisy is going to stick with us three being a f3.

Little does Daisy know that Willow wanted a four person alliance with me and Jacob already, and it didn't include Daisy, so it'll be easy for Willow to think she's on the in, and same for Daisy, which can be GREAT for later.

All I know is I'm going to have to do a little educating to Daisy on how to play this game, and making an alliance with three people and then adding two people LATE is no beuno sweetheart... Thank God Jacob and I prevented that one. At least we know we're in a core for now, and we can start picking off the weaker rookies............... or maybe we go after someone who looks like they can be smarter, and an independent player. Maybe Aro for example? Let's see what happens after immunity (giggle)

So after Chrissa announced she wanted to be voted out, Karen and I were able to talk to each other for the first time this game. I pushed that I didn't want to target her if it wasnt out of hate, and targeting each other based on lack of communication could be easily fixed - after all, what's better than an unlikely duo? I'm in two right now if I'm not being played: as far as I know Linus wants to work with me to get out Karen, and Mitchell also thinks that's what I want. However, I want me an ally in Karen, and Lexi or Mo's gotta go next.

Something terrible happened to me irl yesterday and Im in a bad headspace right now. I really dont feel like talking to anyone besides Luca and Johnny(whos actually pretty cool) so I cant wait to get to the swap. I tried connecting with Kaya a bit but she doesn't seem to like me very much. I have a terrible migraine and everything kinda sucks right now but I'll fight through it. I can't wait for the time when I eventually look back on this confessional and cringe at the angst lmao

I low-key hope I get taken out of this challenge early so I don’t have to sit around all night doing it, but the only way that’d be able to happen is everyone just went after me to start the challenge, and no one knows I’m good at live challenges except Chrissa, and she’s bye bye

Aw Dana assigned me to shoot my fuckbuddy aromal in the first round of the IC :( like the opposite of the hunger games up in here :(

This paintball challenge is so fucking FUN! Like, it's so cool to keep on my toes and constantly be dodging/shooting paintballs. It's like my own sort of little endurance challenge. I just have to be sure I don't miss any dodges... That's why I changed the conversation notification settings to notify me every time my name is said. :P But it's fun, anyway. And if I lose, I can blame my team and use the machete I got. >:3c

So... let's play catch up!

Chrissa got voted out unanimously like she ASKED TO. It sucked bc I liked Chrissa but she was a lil strategically problematic so... whatevs. BUT then Karen starts being like "oh would you have voted for me? where'd my name come from?" and being kind of aggressive about it so... that turned me off. Honestly yeah I would've voted your ass out, you ignored me and continue to do so lol, but after that? I'm set. I think my allegiance with Dana is solidified by my complaining to her about Karen, and honestly? I see her as my #2 in this game.

Matt, the other option for my #2, also tells me he's ready to make a move  against the Karen/Monty/Lexi coalition when we next go to Tribal Council. We're slaying this challenge so that won't be tonight, but when it does, Karen's ass is grass if I've got anything to say about it!!

Karen and Lexi still make minimal effort to talk with me. Pretty much nobody has been 1-on-1 talking with me throughout this whole 3-hour-long-so-far challenge which is also kind of ridiculous but??? What are you gonna do. I'm still sick so hopefully when I recover I'll start schmoozing like I usually do and stop oozing like I don't wanna do.

also fuk u mangrove swamp

RETWEET IF YOU ARE ON TEAM LA NEEDS TO GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP.

This challenge is murdering me. 4.5 hrs left SO.

So, I quit during the paintball challenge. I was the last person left on my tribe and I just couldn't see myself pulling off a win, not against five people - I did manage to get one out on my own but it seemed very doubtful I could have gotten them all. I'm not sure how I feel about throwing it like that, I probably could have faked it and just posted a shoot at the 6 mark which might have been better for my game, cause I'm not sure how that will effect how the vets see me from this point on, or if my tribe finds out and gets mad at me for it, but Y'ALL SHOULD BE HAPPY I DIDN'T MAKE US SUFFER THROUGH ANOTHER FOUR HOURS OF THAT @ VETS. I hate giving up/losing but at the same time, this is only the second challenge of the game. If this has been an individual immunity challenge, damn right I would have stuck it out but it's still early on and I think this vote will be pretty straight forward. IF I manage to get voted out I'll feel so stupid for throwing it but as of right now I trust my alliance and feel safe. (famous last words)

So now Star wants to talk to me...... Tooo little too late bud. You've been talking to the least amount of people this whole game, you didn't even help with the immunity challenge, and now you're coming to me all worried about the vote? Sorry you're in this situation, but you made your own bed, and now you have to lay in it. 

On a different note, I was talking to Jacob, and we were thinking that two of us should throw our votes onto someone else, just in case of an idol play, but honestly, I don't wanna be that paranoid freak always worrying about an idol, but I also don't wanna a repeat of the last tumblr survivor I played in, where I got idol'd out of the game, so I'm trying to be careful. I might talk to Daisy about it, but I don't want to come off as paranoid, so it'll be an interesting talk if I choose to have it...

(Slightly later)

OMG LILY JUST TOLD ME SHE HAS THE IDOL I'M SCREAMING!! Now I don't have to worry about a fucking idol play. Not only that, but she tells me that I'm the only person in the game that knows about the idol, which is huge for me because it means that she trusts me the most, and this can be a relationship outside of Jacob, Daisy, Willow and Luca, so this is really good. I am going to focus on forming a broship with Aro too, just to have that connection, but I think that I'm starting to become very trusted in the tribe, which is good. 

I know my struggle is going to be when we switch tribes, and just hoping that the luck of the draw doesn't put me onto a tribe with bad numbers, but even if I do, I think I'll be able to charm my way out of it. The fact that I want to vote out most of these people, and they still continue to prove to me that they trust me the most is CRAZY, but Lily is definitely going to be a tool I'm going to utilize in the game for a long long time, and I hope she and her idol make it deep enough in the game to benefit me.

Sorry... rambling. My struggle now is whether or not to tell Jacob. I don't want to lose his trust later in the game by him finding out about this idol, and him knowing that I knew about it. I think I'm going to tell him about it later tonight, and I hope that he'll be thrilled, but he isn't even going to be back for day change... At least now I know that I don't have to worry about the idol, especially because I doubt there are more than one idols out there, from my specific tribe, so definitively, it's bye bye Star time :(

Jesus.... Karen and I survived that round.. In what world is that actually realistic? But we did and thankfully with little issues like messy thrown votes or Chrissa playing an idol on herself after misting us all. I was really nervous that it was all an actual trap because I have seen it happen before and boy is it terrifying but bless her heart for being true to us all.

The challenge was one that I have won before so I was not too nervous about the whole workings of the challenge but I was nervous about how long the challenge would go. I was so tired yesterday for some reason and I do not know if I could have lasted until 2 am with very little break. I would have tried my best of course so I could make sure Karen and I were safe but there is only so much a single person can do which L.A. ended up proving. The Veterans won the challenge THANK GOD and so we do not have to worry about one of us being voted out bless. Right now I would def consider Karen my final 2 because we do share the common homie of Callie and I do my best to trust Callie's judgement most of the time (the other times... I just can not defer from what god wants). My only issue is that Karen has a lot of friends on this tribe that I fear she might pick over me such as Monty and that makes me a bit scared of her but right now we sort of need each other in terms that we are both the most threatening ones on our tribe at the moment so if she gets rid of me, she does not have many people to hide behind and I have been known to be a very good meat shield for those that take advantage of it so here is to praying she is actually my final 2.

Okay I love my tribe now. Seriously though I was only disliking them because I was too mentally checked out to socialize. They're all really sweet people and omg it was all i could do to stop them from pronouncing Zaks name wrong lmao during the challenge. Even though I outta be pissed that more than half of us got eliminated for breaking simple rules, I loved that they were cheery about it.

For the vote ahead, it should be a smooth 9-1 against Star. He hasn't been too active thus far and everybody seems to be on board.

https://youtu.be/RpyYL7gVQEE

LAST ROUND VOTING: A SUMMARY We get back to camp after being beaten in the immunity challenge and things devolve into chaos. Mitchell starts whispering "Lexi" and then shouting "WHO SAID THAT! I HEARD YOU! lexi.... WHO WAS THAT!!!!" Lexi and RTP climbed into the shelter and started singing songs together, waiting for other people to join. Matt sat himself on a rock and just kinda sat there...waiting.... Zak was running around, talking to each and every person saying he heard something different to everyone, calling every guy Miss and every girl Qween. Karen was sitting trying to have sensible discussions, and Mitchell and Zak saw this and started freaking out. Mitchell kept his calm and kept whispering lexi... but Zak thought he said Karen and started freaking out. Meanwhile, I'm running around screaming at people that Zak is dead weight and Linus is a rat, but nobody is really listening to me. Meanwhile, Linus disappeared into the woods to maybe go try on some wigs or some shit, and Dana is off talking to anything that moves, with various degrees of success. In the middle of camp is Chrissa, just sitting. Me, Karen, Zak, and Mitchell are all screaming about who should go, and she silently raises her hand and says four words. "I. I will go." Everyone stopped and just kinda looked at her, and then started screaming. Not words, just incoherent noises, and that never stopped until Chrissa's torch was snuffed by Isaac

real confessional for this round: So, this has been a pretty chill round. As a tribe, our number one priority was winning immunity. I staying longer than a few people, until I had to go swim. I still need to talk to Dana, Lexi, and RTP this round to keep those connections alive, but other than that, my social game is less shitty than in the past! So, overall, this is not looking terrible for me!

IS DAISY FUCKING KIDDING ME?!? Daisy, girl, we spoke about this. Adding people to alliance chats can only cause problems. Making a brand new chat is the way that it has to be. I can't be closely tied with someone who is actually that oblivious to how this game goes. It's like telling someone that there's a three person alliance, and we just want them to be fourth on the ladder. THAT'S NOT HOW THIS WORKS. Luckily for me, it's someone as ditzy as Lily is, and it's someone who doesn't really talk to a lot of people, and she's someone who has an idol, and now Daisy and I were both told by Lily, which is why Daisy added her.

One thing that Lily and Daisy aren't aware of is that Jacob knows about the idol too, and that's because I told him, so with Jacob in the loop, and me being the one who told me, is PRIME. I need to be the barrier of communication between all of them, and right now I think I'm doing a steady job. One thing I need to work on is my relationship with Allie and LA, because they're two SMART girls, who I haven't been spending much time talking to, so I might work on that later today, even though I've spoken briefly about the vote to both of them, I need MORE!

Well after the mess with Chrissa we were lucky enough to win, and I think the challenge was a good bonding experience for the tribe. Now I'm kind of in the middle right now I like my alliance a lot but I think I could work with Karen and Lex in the future so I'm nervous about alienating them and I'm like back and forth back and forth like a metronome or some dumb swingy shit. So lemme just cross my fingers we don't have to go to tribal, and that somebody I know will get this damn idol ay dios bio

We lost the immunity challenge earlier. I'm super disappointed but I doubt I'm in any trouble at tribal council. I kinda messed up by posting early, lost my head and this probably was a factor in our tribe losing. On their tribe, only three people messed up.

But challenge aside, I feel I'm pretty safe for the time being here. I like Jacob, Willow, LA, Johnny and Allie and I think I'm getting along with Aromal too. Really the only people who I haven't really been talking with are Star (who's getting evicted today), Daisy and Lily.

I should probably talk more with the other two. All that said, this game is phenomenal. You can never know if you're really safe.

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!! I FOUND THE FUCKING IDOL AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA But like... wow. I find the idol clue on my very first search, and then on my second search, I find the idol itself. When will your fave... #newqueenintown

We won! Updates game wise so I'm just utr1 instead of inv. 

1. Zak is still a self righteous prick, but he's also smart enough to just flat out target me rn, so idk. 

2. Matt is easy to talk game with, he's seeming a bit paranoid though. 

3. Dana and Ryan, still love em both. 

4. Mitchell is everyone's best friend, hillarious dude. That also sadly means he is the biggest threat in the game. Of course, right now I want to work with threats, but eventually he will be scary. 

5. Karen is still my target. 

6. Gotta try and make Lexi and Monty not flip at a swap. 

7. Linus is the best, he's probably the front runner to win right now.

Okay so I keep forgetting about confessionals oops. But I'm going to my first tribal council ever tonight and I'm a little nervous. I feel like this vote tonight should be pretty simple because everyone in the tribe wants to vote out Star, but I'm worried that he might have an idol or something since 9/10 people in our tribe looked for the idol yesterday. Also I'm still a little bit irritated at myself from the challenge yesterday because it said 7:05 on my computer when I pressed send but it was still 7:04 on the skype clock or whatever Idk

#thequeenstaysqueen