My dad and I were walking to the farmer’s market this morning and just as we got to the parking lot, a Tesla truck pulled into the other end of the lot. And it was like looking at a glitch in the matrix, but that makes it sound cool and it wasn’t, it was like watching someone slip on a banana peel, or eating foam and calling it dinner, something that is just so stupid that it was unreal. Right in the uncanny valley. And my dad didn’t know what it was (bless him) and when I said “Tesla truck” (I live too much of my life online) he said, “that’s not a truck?” And I tried really hard not to just collapse laughing in the road in front of this bizarre vehicle because I knew that it would drive right over me and probably drink my blood afterwards.
And when we got to the other end of the lot, a woman coming out the market asked what it was. We were all just stunned at this brutalist Lovecraftian horror and couldn’t stop laughing and I told her it was a Tesla truck and she said, very loudly, “It’s SO UGLY.” And then I lost it again.
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