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bitchwithaportalhyperfixation · 11 months

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putting this rant here about somebody i met in discord rp. not any of you if you were wondering. just. just know that he was an asshole and i've cut off contact with him

BITCH MOTHERTFUCKING BITH ASSHOLE MF HELL FUCK FUCK FCUK UOUUUU CANCCLEDD MY ASS I WILL KCK YORU ASS BITCH I WILL DEMOLISH THAT SENTENCE HELL FUCK ASSHOLE SHIT I WROTE 3 PAGES MAN YOU CAN'T JUST CANCEL IT YOU CAN'T JUST DO THAT AND THEN TELL NOBODY ABOUT THIS SHIT HAVE YOU NO RESPECT FOR ART I WATCH MOVIE REVIEWS DO YOU BITCHASS MOTHERFUCKER GO AWAY I FUCKING I FUCK FUCK SHIT FYCK SHIT I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS MANN FUCK YOU "oh but we can't do this itneresting plot point beacuse i decidd on this rule of the universe that is very miniscle and unimportant no we cant change it for the sake of bettering the story hehehe" BITCH SHUT UP I WANAN TELL A GOOD STORY AND YOU'RE OVER HERE MAKING IT ALL SHIT FUCKING FUCK SHIT FUCK! THANK GOD YOU'RE NOT PLAYIGN THE LEADER OF THE ENITEE ORG I WAS ACTIVELY DREADING HAVING TO WORK WITH THAT I CAN BARELY HANDLE THAT SHIT MAN I CAN'T. FUCKING DEAL. IS THIS WHAT IT WA SLIKE TO HAVE ME AND MY SHADOW CANCELLED. IS THIS WHAT IT WAS LIKE. YEAH. PROBABLY. EXCEPT THIS TIME IT'S STIVKING AROUND BITH. SHADOW DAN FORVEER. I HATE THIS. I AHTE YOU I HATE EVERYTHING UGHHHHHH WE'RE GONNA WRITE SOME GOOD SHIT MAN WE'RE GONNA DO IT GOOOOOOOOD. IT'S GONNA BE SO GOOD. IT'S GONNA BE SO FUCKING GOOD YOU CAN'T STOP US. WE'RE GONNA DO SO GOOD MAN. I AM LISTENIGN TO THE FUCKING CORE TRANSFER SCENE MSUIC AS I WRITE THIS BECAUSE THAT'S THE ONLY WAY I CAN DESRIBE THIS FEELING. A MIXTURE OF SMUGNESS WITH A TINY OF EVIL AND ALSO FUCKING BURNING RAGE. AND ASLO AHINT OF POWER MADNESS OVER ALL THE SHIT I CAN DO WITHOUT YOUR ASS. WE'RE GONNA DO SO GOOD MAN JUST YOU WAIT. IDARE YOU. WE'LL DO SO GOOD. HAHAH. HAHAHAHA. MWAAAHAHAHSJDKFHGFJDKEIRUTHGFJKDOIRTUGHMAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. YOU HEAR THAT I'M LAUGHING AT YOU. YEAH THATS RIGHT BITCH. I'M LAUGHING I'M LAUGHING BECAUSE WE'RE GONNA DO SO GOOD. BITH. MOTHERFUCKER. HAHAAHAHA. WATCH ME DO BECK BETTER I WILL I WILL WITHOUT KNOWING SH

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sunderedazem · 1 year

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Who are your 3 least favorite Swtor companions and why?

OH YOU HAD TO ASK!

Okay first- Doc. Don't get me wrong, I have never once played an f!knight because i have approximately one (1) Jedi Knight Blorbo who lives in my brain eating my braincells at all times - but EVEN SO, how he acts towards unromanceable characters is so fucking annoying. Corrain has so much fun telling him to fuck off when he tries to mess with Kira. my god. bitchass 'doctor'

Second would be Skadge. his personality is just Villain, there's nothing interesting about him besides him being a Generic Sith Baddie without the Force Powers and buffoonery. and he's not even like, an INTERESTING villain, like Khem Val, with his Sithy History stuff, or Broonmark, who at least has a motivation beyond "Likes Being Pointlessly and Annoyingly Evil," or Tanno Vik/Kaliyo, who are at least kind of just like "fuck authority and morals but I'll hang around for the paycheck and the perks." Skadge is just. bitter about being thrown in jail....for being an extremely violent gang leader who enjoyed exploiting people for no reason. like what?

and Third....M1-4X. Like....he's kind of okay in the sense that he's not rude or anything but if I had to pick a character that would pull some shit like "but it's patriotic to turn in suspected Undesirables to the government now!" it would be M1-4X. Like I understand why it's wise to make the superweapondroid intensely, unnervingly loyal to the government it's supposed to serve.....but the utter *lack* of ability to criticize a government is fucking terrifying and my queer ass is a little too keyed up around nationalists to like him.

Thanks for the ask!!! <3

#magicallulu7 #swtor companion ask #least fave swtor comps #yes i'm part of the #fuck skadge club #also fuck doc but pointedly NOT in the fun way

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archive-of-the-incident · 8 months

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Oh my fucking god bitch you ARE crazy you’re fucking worse than Jared C and he’s BUILT to be as batshit and dangerous as you meanwhile he’s not the one doing anything and is the one getting fucking hurt!! You admit to using your mental illness as an excuse all the time why does ANYONE fucking lime you??

1. Petty fucking sick freak for a weak threat of “drawing gore art of the next person who calls you a groomer” Oh what are you that cartoony evil toddler archetype what the fuck is wrong with you???

2. Something about “messing everything up no one will miss me” Yea no shit!! Nobody needs you here you should NOT be trusted on the fucking internet you need to be in a goddamn straitjacket far from society dawg cuz you are absolutely batshit for doing this to us just because I called you and others out!! Why the fuck is Sam on your sidw?? They came running to your fucking defense to “erm actually” us and mention your bitchass!!

I can’t you’re fucking insane

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polyboros · 2 years

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once again i am thinking about the recontextualization of tales of zestiria's worldbuilding premise post-tales of berseria

#kbitycus talks #the series of tales games that drive me insane etc etc unfortunately no tales game that comes out after berseria will ever be good again #(as evidenced by arise)#anyways dezel and eizen are fated to never meet by both eizen's dragonification and dezel's death but i think they shouldve talked #the [narrative] is [cylical] in nature . eizen knows a thing or two about people deadset on revenge (blinded by it)#also also also i am thinking abt maotelus in zestiria as compared to laphicet in berseria #knowing that the first fucking. evil guy i cant remember their title. is perpetually locked in a malevolence loop with #the evil bitchass god of all time #REALLY puts the shepard narrative into uhhhhh A NEW LIGHT. ID SAY.#not even mentioning the fact that artorius is just blatantly straight up evil. the first shepard was evil (THIS HAS BEEN LOST TO TIME)#((THAT DRIVES ME BONKERS EVERY DAY))#sorey ALSO ENDS UP IN A SIMILAR SITUATION TO VELVET EXCEPT W LAPHI (MAOTELUS) and that drives me insane also #and then he becomes a seraph and reunites with his boyfriend 🎉 woo #but like. jsjhhhhhnnngngny. dezel & rose. (points at the tales of berseria crew very fervently)#velvet (set on revenge) rokurou (set on revenge (kind of)) magilou (girls just wanna have fun (revenge))#& then theres eizen and laphicet and eleanor who are kind of just some guys (REALLY FUCKED UP)#i think berseria had its bad writing moments but i do think they did an excellent job showing how daemons get fixated on One Emotion #even if they can still feel the full human range & love & such #rokurou is fixated on besting his brother/power‚ velvet is literally the conduit for two Big Emotions #magilou isnt a demon shes just fucked up. love her 💜

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jupitersson · 3 years

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Hello and welcome to my mind where I ask myself “matthew mercer. if i’m not supposed to fall in love with your villains, why are they all so fucking hot?”

I know they probably weren’t all actually super fucking banging hot in canon but y’all artists make them super fucking banging hot and I’m simple and gay and can’t handle it so here are my exhibits:

Exhibit A: The Briarwoods

credit to @americankimchi for this lovely drawing of two super sexy evil bitches whom i fucking love, complete with vax having an internal bisexual crisis like that one i’m feeling. why are they so sexy? sylas briarwood is making me feel things for a man i’ve never felt before. and delilah? fucking delilah? look at that woman. i want delilah briarwood to choke me out, none of this to mention when laura dressed up as delilah and i literally combusted. thank you and goodbye.

Exhibit B: Anna Ripley

credit to @diwhitney for this anna ripley, she’s lovely. listen. i know she’s a bitch who did some bad things (sorry percy), but when i saw marisha as her for halloween i just. i’m predictable, okay. sue me. look at that long coat. i’m a slut for a long coat. and the high waisted pants? girl look at those legs, i don’t even care that you’re missing a hand, i’m sure you’re good enough with that gun wielding one to make someone very happy.

Exhibit C: Avantika

credit to @cha-chi-san for this incredible avantika

okay so we all agree we would become followers of uk’otoa for avantika right? just me? well. matt literally said, “how can i make my villains even sexier” and decided he’d give her a french accent and a sleeveless coat and cleavage and i tripped over myself into the waiting arms of the leviathan just for avantika to like idk fucking wink at me or something. i’m so weak for her.

Exhibit D: Lucien

credit to @lulii999 for this lucien

listen okay. i hate this motherfucker. i hate his bitchass to the astral sea to the material plane and back. god if he isn’t a compelling and sexy ass villain though like shit matthew. this is less “i want him to destroy me” and more “i want to be him” energy though because imagine having the gravitas that lucien has. the drama, especially after what we saw in episode 138. i hate him so much but he’s such a great villain. matthew mercer making me confused for over five years now i think? idk i’m bad at time.

if anyone else has any insights in matthew mercer’s world of Sexy Ass Villains feel free to reach out, these were just the five i constantly think of (mainly delilah, god, i’m a whore for delilah briarwood and everything about her)

also go check out those artists! support your local friendly artist, fr, they’re super talented

#critical role #shitpost #siloh speaks #delilah briarwood #sylas briarwood #anna ripley #avantika #lucien #long post

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fae-fucker · 3 years

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Zenith: Chapter 85-89

Chapter 85

We’re back with Dex because describing fight scenes is hard and we need Dex to notice that the Xen Pterans are shooting people with a “silvery substance.” What could it beeeee?

Dex contemplates abandoning ship, so to speak, but then Andi gets hurt and he’s like “oh no, my waifu!”

The shots were fewer, lessening to the point that he knew they had no time. That in seconds, he would probably be next.

But he couldn’t look away.

When she stood, somehow hauling herself up on shaky feet, Dex knew that Valen would die.

Because it was not Andi who rose, but someone else in her place.

The Bloody Baroness.

Wow, this is soooo coool you guys! I can’t wait until I get to experience this epic fight scene! I bet Valen, who’s a painter and a bitchass weakling, will have a hard time against the Bloody Baroness, the most notorious assassin space pirate in all of Adarlan Mirabel! It’s gonna be so cool!

Chapter 86

Andi gets shanked and passes out.

Oh and her crew get shot with Zenith.

I think this is the first time I’m gonna accuse a book of having a big mouth. What was the point of that, Shinsay? Only served to make your protagonist look like a chump. Even at her best and most ruthless Andi can’t hold her own.

In the previous chapters, Valen had been so bad at stabbing his father, who wasn’t even defending himself, that the guy didn’t die right away. But now he makes short work of the *~*Bloody Baroness*~*, Mirabel’s greatest and most fearsome space pirate? That’s embarrassing.

Chapter 87

Dex, the only one who’s allowed any agency because he’s got a dick, I guess, somehow reaches the stage unnoticed despite the chaos dying down. Convenient that Valen had to have a dramatic little stroll down the catwalk.

Dex notes that there isn’t any actual blood anywhere except the soldiers’ and that the Xen Pterans seem to be obeying Valen. Clearly we’re dealing with a genius here.

I also want to point out that in the previous chapter from his POV, he watched a man get shot in the head, and saw this closely enough to notice how a “silvery substance” splattered against a man’s forehead where the bullet had “gone in” and how the liquid was absorbed by his skin. Did he not ... notice that the man’s head wasn’t actually blown open? Or is this book implying that the man was shot and there was indeed a hole in his head, but he somehow ... didn’t bleed, and no brains came out the other side? Does Zenith have the power to stop that from happening somehow? Is the guy just walking around with a hole in his head now? Or is it meant to say that the bullet itself was semi-liquid and didn’t actually penetrate the skull and only splashed against the man’s head? If that’s the case, Dex should’ve noticed how weird it was then, not now. Ugh, whatever, man. We’re almost at the end.

Chapter 88

We’re back with Valen and find out that he apparently has a telepathic link with Nor, as he informs her that everything is ready for her arrival. We also find out that apparently, his torture at Lunamere is what unlocked the telepathy and also his “compulsion ability,” which confirms that yes, he was aware of everything, including his plan and true motivations, from the very start of the book.

So why oh why did he refer to himself as Valen Cortas throughout his chapters, in his very own head, when he always considered himself to be Valen Solis? How come he conveniently switched only when the “twist” was already revealed? Why did he never once think about the betrayal he was planning when talking to Androma? Because that would give away the plot twist to the reader, and we can’t have that!

But then don’t fucking make him a POV character, maybe? Because now it just seems like he’s, on some level, aware of the reader and is censoring himself somehow, which naturally makes zero fucking sense. His scenes contributed literally nothing to any of the plot, and their existence only highlights how manipulative and disingenuous the writing is. The chapters were literally only there to mislead the reader by way of lying to their face and withholding information.

This wasn’t a twist where everything suddenly made sense and made you realize the connection between seemingly unrelated details, this is a “twist” where the authors lie to you, insisting there is no twist, and then expect you to be in awe of their storytelling when they reveal their lie. It’s like a magician doing a disappearing act, but instead of using smoke and mirrors to distract you, they just have an assistant choke you out and then leave the stage.

Ugh, this makes me so mad.

Anyway, we find out that some people are immune to Zenith and have to be put down the old-fashioned way because they’re useless to Nor and her mighty empire. Valen does seem a bit sad about Andi being immune too and about having to stab her, which I’m guessing is a setup for a future redemption and/or side switch, but who knows and/or cares.

Valen notices that his father, Andi, and Dex are all gone, but assumes they won’t get away. How convenient that he’s apparently forgotten all about the many secret passages that his father has all over the place. Andi and Dex know about them, but he doesn’t? Alright.

Nor is arriving and Valen takes a moment to make another threatening speech to all the Zenith-zombos. It’s very dramatic. He asks the zombos who the rightful ruler of Mirabel is, and they’re all “Nor Solis,” and then he orders them to kneel and it’s very dramatic and evil and stuff.

The woman of the hour arrives and the chapter ends.

Chapter 89

We’re with Nor and she’s gloating about how wise she is for torturing her brother to near-death. Check a look.

She’d been wise to keep him in Lunamere for so long, tortured to near death. It had unlocked his compulsion ability, his true self. His birthright. That was when she had begun to visit him daily in his cell. Training him, guiding him, gaining his trust.

In case you guys forgot that she’s evil.

But also, is it just me or does this come off as Shinsay trying to retroactively justify their own twist. Like “yes she tortured him for two years but um, she also, uh, spent time with him, and visited him, and that’s how she gained his trust, so it makes sense why he’s on her side now!” Just say she brainwashed him. Y’all are clearly not competent enough to deal with the implication that she emotionally (and physically obvs) abused and manipulated him.

God, that’s what they’re gonna go for in Nexus, isn’t it? I mean I guess it would make more sense in terms of explaining why Valen is doing this, but I don’t trust Shinsay to handle this with any tact or care at all.

There are already implications of this happening, Valen seems to be under the belief that he’ll get an equal cut as his sister even as he recognizes that she’s glorious and powerful and whatever, but Nor straight up just thinks he’ll always be inferior to her.

Nor stopped herself from curling her lip at the sight of his figure. Too thin, too angular, too pained. No member of the Solis family deserved such treatment. But it had to be done, to ensure that his survival instincts would kick in, to force his powers to unlock.

She would reward him later for his loyalty, perhaps with a crown of his own. He was a prince of darkness. Her long-lost brother, finally come home to her side where he belonged.

But never her equal. She would rule alone.

I love how she doesn’t even try to justify the torture or blame it on her enemies with ye olde “my hand was forced.” No she just goes “oh no my poor abused brother ... had to abuse him for his own (but mostly my) best.” Stay classy, Nor.

Gosh, she’s just so evil, you guys! That’s why we spent countless chapters in her head, seeing her being all sad and Complex and are expected to sympathize with and/or understand her on some level.

Because she’s just evil.

Can y’all decide on what you’re going for here, Shinsay? No? Ok.

Anyway, Nor slits the throats of the former leaders of Mirabel, including, I assume, Lira’s aunt.

Fun times.

#eff reads: zenith

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lemonade-of-gods · 2 years

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I posted 9,949 times in 2021

290 posts created (3%)

9659 posts reblogged (97%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 33.3 posts.

I added 2,102 tags in 2021

#tgcf - 506 posts

#mdzs - 420 posts

#hualian - 232 posts

#svsss - 220 posts

#the untamed - 188 posts

#2ha - 164 posts

#wangxian - 107 posts

#bingqiu - 97 posts

#ranwan - 91 posts

#wrightworth - 77 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#like i don't know if i'm reading it wrong but i like that krishna tells arjuna to do what's right even tho that means fighting your relative

My Top Posts in 2021

The key to writing an excellent protagonist is making your readers go "MY CHILD LET ME GIVE YOU A HUG AND BURN THE WHOLE WORLD FOR YOU" and "MY FUCKING GOD HOW IS YOUR BITCHASS STILL ALIVE WITH THAT SMOOTH A BRAIN IMMA HIT YOU WITH A BAT -" simultaneously

60 notes • Posted 2021-11-22 05:05:32 GMT

Xie Lian kneeling in submission to Jun Wu and saying sorry is scary sexy, but you know what is even sexier?

Xie Lian kneeling in submission and saying sorry to Hua Cheng as part of their "evil ghost king of Mt Tonglu/puppet of ghost king" roleplay in the cave of 10000 carvings/the erotic fanart (YOU KNOW WHICH ONE)

BONUS: HOW IT HAPPENED

Fengqing ranting about Xie's love life: "HE'LL LOCK YOU UP IN THE CAVE AND TIE YOU WITH HIS GODFORSAKEN SILK! DO YOU WANT TO BE SQUASHED UNDER HIS BOOT OR HAVE HIM DEFILE YOU - WAIT A FUCKING SECOND ARE YOU TAKING NOTES?!?!?!"

Xie Lian, hiding the brush and papers away: "IT'S FOR RESEARCH PURPOSES!!!"

82 notes • Posted 2021-11-20 12:44:13 GMT

The contrast damn

88 notes • Posted 2021-03-09 07:31:49 GMT

Are you a war criminal trying to commit but your lover is on the side of the law?

Is your lover an authority figure attempting to put you on the right path or attempting to get out of your path altogether?

Does your lover exhibit feline tendencies and hiss when you show affection?

There is an answer!

Professor Mo Ran's course for shizunfuckers: now open!

Join us on a 30 day programme where we shall explore the ways of the mysterious and elusive Shizun!

This course offers:

- 6 different ways of decoding a shizun

- 3 failsafe alternatives for when your Shizun misunderstands you and dies to save your life

- 3 volumes on techniques to bring your Shizun back to life when he gives it up to save yours and to keep him alive

- 10 scenarios to trap your Shizun so that he doesn't run away when you've confessed your love and are trying to make it as clear as possible

Reviews: (rating in *)

- Luo Binghe: *****

I used to think my Shizun hated me, but after attending this course it completely changed my worldview! Shizuns as a breed are very demanding as it turns out and you have to put in a lot of effort, but everything is worth being a malewife in the end! To anyone in doubt, go forth and dubcon your Shizun, they're too shy to request it themselves!

- Hua Po'Nan: *

Instructions unclear. Attempted to dubcon but Shizun ran away after I brought him back to life. I have to support the family and an empire too. Who has the time to become a fulltime malewife? This course is useless.

- Xu Shuanglin: *

Shizun didn't come back even after I went through all the volume 1 techniques. Professor Mo Ran is a hack. Would not recommend.

TaxianJun (admin):

@/xushuanglin: have you tried the technique of letting go of your hatred first?

Xu Shuanglin:

@/TaxianJun: no what for

- Lan Qiren: rating not added

SHAMELESS!!!!!

Shen Qiao:

@/lanqiren: I agree. Sect Leader Yan, put the tablet down. We've been married for 3 years now.

- Xue Meng: rating not added

YOU DOG, WHAT THE FRESH HELL ARE YOU ADVERTISING?!?!?! I DID NOT MEAN THIS WHEN I SAID SISHENG PEAK NEEDED ALTERNATIVE FUND SOURCES!!!!

- Zhang Chengling: ***

(edited) Theoretically sound advice. Difficult to translate in practice. A-Xu still tries to avoid me when I suggested trying nine shallows one deep. SHIFU IF YOU'RE READING THIS I'M SORRY BUT I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!!! THAT WEN KEXING CREATED AN ACCOUNT USING MY NAME!!!!

See the full post

114 notes • Posted 2021-10-09 18:42:55 GMT

This reminded me of that one post about dropping honourifics and keeping languages separate to make the text flow smoother and I'd like to put in my two cents as an Asian myself:

I've clowned on people who use oppa and unnie with random strangers but I genuinely feel uncomfortable if honourifics aren't used the way they are used in canon text or in that culture in general. Not using them in narration is one thing, but in dialogue it just feels wrong to take them out.

Like in malayalam, "edthi" is used for your sister by girls, "oppol" by guys and "chechi" for any unrelated lady. How on earth do you get the same impact across if you just use 'sister' or an 'excuse me'?

Like imagine if you replace "gege" in tgcf with "big bro" or "Xie Lian". Boom, 25% of the spirit of the novel goes bye bye.

And then we come to the dilemma of Jin Ling's Uncle. In my family, the aunts from your mother's father's side are called "chittashi" and those from your mother's mother's side are called "ichamma". Your aunts from father's mother's side is "achammal". (and stuff like chittamma which I'm pretty sure belongs to the great aunts, I gotta research that)

If I had to write "paternal aunt from father" or "maternal aunt from father" or some shit every single time I'd quit writing instantly.

FOOTNOTES AND INDEX ARE THERE FOR A REASON PEOPLE. DON'T BE AFRAID TO USE IT.

302 notes • Posted 2021-10-06 07:39:24 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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howaboutalittlehelpneos · 4 years

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YGO! Questionnaire

Tagged by @cipher-wise

Pleasantly surprised to be in one of these, so let’s go

Favorite series: *Gestures to icon* Is it any surprise I’ll be picking GX? I love GX with all my heart and soul. The story’s pacing is very good and never feels like it’s dragging its feet to get to where it’s going, most duels are over in less than a full episode with the longest one being three, there are so many good characters to get invested in, and this boy right here is your protagonist.

Look at him blow kisses to the audience after beating Crowler, how could anyone not love Jaden Yuki? I care him so much. Even the filler episodes in GX are pretty fun to watch most of the time, and it’s the good kind of filler that may not advance the plot much or at all, but it’ll give you plenty of good memories to take with you. Who could possibly forget the eggwich thief? Not to mention the soundtrack fucking slaps.

Favorite protagonist: I mean...

Yeah it’s Jaden. GX hooked me immediately when I started watching it because of how much I loved this boy. He’s that perfect mix of cocky and sweet when it comes to dueling because he’s confident in his own abilities, but he never stops having fun and being amazed at what his opponent can do, he cares about all of his friends and does his best to help them with their problems, he’s kind to strangers, and he has exactly half a brain cell.

I feel the gif speaks for itself, but Jaden’s dialogue when he turns around here is “I’m such a sucker for things like this! I’ll help you, ma’am!” Dorothy says “No, you’ll be late... Don’t you have a test today?” And Jaden replies with “Who cares if I’m late? I couldn’t leave a lady in trouble!” Jaden Yuki is my absolute favorite protagonist.

Favorite rival: Oh man is that a tough one. Am I allowed to pick two? It’s a hard call to make between this dumb edgy bitch-

And this dumb gay bitch

Honestly they’re tied for favorite rival in my book. I absolutely loved Chazz when I watched GX, and I thought his arc about breaking through his inferiority/superiority complex and learning to accept loss as a part of life without letting it define him was wonderfully written, and seeing him grow as a person throughout the show just made me feel happy for him. Shark... I really thought I wasn’t going to end up liking Shark at first, but god he just gets so much better as Zexal goes on, starting out as this mean spirited middle school bully in episode one, and slowly ending up as Yuma’s boyfriend closest friend. It’s incredible to look back at how Shark acts when he’s first introduced and compare it to... season 3, I think it was, where just hearing the words “Yuma’s in danger” is enough to send him running to his rival’s side. Chazz and Shark. They are my favorites.

Favorite BFF: Him

Crow Hogan is an absolute treasure and he was my favorite part about watching 5Ds. This little bird man first gets introduced by stealing cards for his kids and clowning on Sector Security, and he’s a source of so much good throughout the show. Excellent best friend (technically brother but I’m counting him), wonderful father, 10/10 person all around. Plus the fact that the only thing stopping him from berating his bitchass brother even more was Yusei having to literally pick him up and pull him away is definitely extra points in my book. What a powerful little bird. His only weakness is people that are taller than him, which is unfortunately most people.

Favorite GFF:

Yuzu. Have I actually watched Arc V yet? No, but I’m still picking Yuzu for my number one here. Tea and Tori are just awful characters, I’m neutral towards Alexis, and Akiza... Did have potential to be something interesting on her own, despite how uncomfortable she made me in seasons 1-2 of 5Ds, but her relevance is alllll downhill from there. I’ve seen one clip of Yuzu yelling at a man eating pie and calling him a 100th rate duelist, and that was all I needed to know she would be my favorite. (Clip here)

Favorite villain: Oh boy

The fuckin carrot is my favorite villain, and I say this as someone who fully believes he didn’t deserve to be in the last episode. Vector did some fucked up shit in his day, and he only continued to do fucked up shit in Yuma’s day, but I have to say he was pretty effective when it came down to his goals. He got things done and went right for what he wanted by taking direct action to seize Don Thousand’s power, and he manipulated Yuma perfectly by preying on his kind nature and love for Astral to use him to further his goals.

...Plus I mean just look at his subbed dialogue God he’s such a slut. Evil slutty alien.

Tl;dr Vector was a horrible horrible person, but he was a good villain, and he was so entertaining whenever he was on screen that it was impossible not to like him. Still kinda wish he got what he deserved though, and what he deserved definitely wasn’t another chance.

Speaking of Don Thousand though, can we talk about how unfairly pretty he is? If I had to pick a runner up villain in terms of looks alone, it would definitely be him.

God it was not fair how pretty the big bad of Zexal was. He’s fucking gorgeous, and in my opinion, the best looking villain at the very least.

Favorite card: *Sweats in Duel Links* Favorite? There’s so many cards out there to pick from, but since I’ve already broken the rules with my two favorite rivals, I’ll be picking two of each card type: Spells, traps, and monsters. One for the aesthetic, and one for how often I make use of it.

First up, the Aesthetics group

What can I say, Vampiric Koala is such a cutie, Dwimmered Path has some really pretty card art, and Rainbow Life is an eternal flex on any heteros I may encounter while playing Duel Links. Nothing better than a gay trap card.

Now for usability

Dragon Knight of Creation is suuuper helpful in any dragon themed deck and has a permanent slot in my decks for Mokuba and Kaiba, PoG is always a fun way to boost up weak monsters to ridiculous heights, and Dark Bribe just lets you block your opponent like “Okay I know you wanna hurt me but I will let you draw another card if you do not do that thing”, and they can’t refuse you.

Favorite episode: I’ll be copying cipher’s format here and picking one for each series, but this will still only total out to five for me since I’ve yet to watch past Zexal ^^; Soon I’ll get to Arc V! One day...

Season 0: Episode 16: Turnabout by a Hair's Breadth - The White-Robed Crisis I’m a sucker for my son Joey, and this was a good Joey episode about him and his sister, plus it was nice seeing that doctor get what he deserved :) Duel Monsters: Season 5, episode 12-14: The Deciding Match for Duel King - Yugi vs. Leon/Golden Castle of Stromberg/KC Grand Prix Ends Probably a weird batch of episodes to pick, I know, but a lot of DM was kinda forgettable to me, and these are some of the few episodes I do recall. I just... really felt for Leon’s situation, and I wanted good things for that boy. I care him. GX: Season 3, episode 34: Dark Fusion! Inferno Wing!! Jim. Jim Jim Jimmmmm. This was the episode that finally made me understand why saviorshipping was a thing because it hits you with all these memories Jim has of Jaden and shows how they bonded before all this Dark World shit happened, and the whole thing was very emotional. 5Ds: Season 4, episode 2-3: Recollections, Entrusted with a Friend's Dying Wish God Crow, my precious bird son. I really liked the backstory they gave him, despite how much it hurt. It was probably the best character development he got in the whole of 5Ds, and let you see a side to him you probably wouldn’t expect. I loved watching him get his justice. Zexal II: Season 2, episode 5-6: Alito the Silent Fighter - Reunion of the Passionate Duelists!/ Be Revived! The Duelist Soul That Transcends Life!! I picked these episodes for Nistro and Nistro alone. He was one of my absolute favorites in Zexal, and seeing how well he and Dextra were doing was good for the soul. Just look at this good lion man right here.

Look at him!!!

Favorite decks to use: Elemental Heroes, Aromages, Red Eyes, Six Samurai, and Crystal Beasts.

Fusion, Ritual, Synchro, Xyz, Pendulum, or Link: I’m a simple girl, I love fusion/tributes for how easy they are, but synchro can be pretty fun, too

Years in fandom: ??? Even I don’t know the answer to this one, friends. I used to be in the fandom when I was in middle school, wrote/read a few fanfics here and there, but then I fell out of it for... Well I’m 22 now and only got back into things 6 months ago? I started rewatching the abridged series of Duel Monsters in March, and from there I just wanted to consume actual Yugioh content and never went back.

Who am I tagging: @finding-fallen-petals @dizziedaikonn @chazzaroo Go wild y’all

#ygo tag meme #ygo dm #ygo gx #ygo 5ds #ygo zexal #jaden yuki #judai yuki #chazz princeton #jun manjoume #shark kastle #ryoga kamishiro #crow hogan #yuzu hiiragi #ygo zexal vector #ygo zexal nistro #gauche #probably the longest post ive ever made on this blog jesus christ

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yikeswtfmate · 4 years

Text

(1) New Message from Unknown Number

main masterlist // (1) New Message Masterlist // next part

Summary: Y/N is drunk and can’t remember her ex’s number.

A/N: Hello, it is I, the idiot who writes Social Media AUs when she’s drunk but is too lazy to put them in the proper format and just leaves them to die somewhere on her laptop

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Social Media AU - that’s a lie, it’s actually just texts in Word format 🤡)

Warnings: swearing, dumbassery

Unknown Number: Hey asshat so listen

Unknown Number: I kno we hvnt spoken since like

Unknown Number: High school but whateve idc

Unknown Number: U’re an asshle so I dnt even care that its like…

Unknown Number: 3 in the morning nvrmd

Unknown Number: Ive ben dared to txt my hottest ex by these evil witchS so

Unknown Number: Here u go

Unknown Number: At least u had decent abs so congrats on tht jfc

Unknown Number: also u dnt get to complain abt this txt bc like

Unknown Number: u dated me for 6 months on a dare so U KNOW WHat this shuold feel like ya

Unknown Number: Wow dude that sounds like a dick move

Unknown Number: Seriously who the hell dates someone for 6 months on a dare?

Unknown Number: Doesn’t that only happen in movies though?

Unknown Number: hey bitchass dont act like u don’t kno what im talkinG abt

Unknown Number: Oh shit yeah, sorry. I don’t know who this asshole of an ex is but I sure as hell am not him

Unknown Number: Dude sounds like a complete waste of human space

Unknown Number: And I think I wouldn’t get to live it down if my friends would hear I did something that shitty

Unknown Number: Wait lemme ask Sam

Unknown Number: Nah, he says Steve would’ve beaten my ass if I were to do that so there u go

Unknown Number: m sorry who tf are u

Unknown Number: Bucky

Unknown Number: what kind of stupid name is bucky

Unknown Number: Shit man, u’re the one blowing up my phone at 3 in the morning, sending me weird ass messages when I don’t even know u and u dare say my name is stupid???

Unknown Number: Sheit srry

Unknown Number: Is been A long night

Unknown Number: nd week

Unknown Number: Actlly make thAt the whle entire fuckin month

Girl with asshole ex: Srry fr bothering u

Unknown Number: It‘s cool

Girl with asshole ex: Hey the witches ask if ure hot

Bonky: Yeah

Girl with asshole ex: WHAT THE FCK MAN AT LEST BE A LIL BIT HUMBLE SMH

Bonky: U wanted me to lie?

Girl with asshole ex: Fair point

Girl with asshole ex: They wnt a pic

Girl with asshole ex: Pic or it didn’t happen punk

Girl with asshole ex: Tht was nat

Bonky: What kind of party are u at that you can constantly text me?

Girl with asshole ex: Wanda’s place

Girl with asshole ex: Girls night

Girl with asshole ex: Getting hammered on wine BITCH

Girl with asshole ex: Also dnt change the subject

Bonky: I don’t even know your name

Girl with asshole ex: Why would I tell u my name I just want to see a suppsdly hot asssd

Bonky: You know mine and now you want me to send u a pic of me

Bonky: Bit of a disadvantage here babe

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: BABE?

Girl with asshole ex: Fine

Girl with asshole ex: BABE if I tell u my name will u send a pic of u so we kno u arnt a 60yr old perv

Bonky: I’ll think about it

Girl with asshole ex: Hey fuck u

Girl with asshole ex: Not fair

Bonky: How do I know you’re not the 60yr old perv?

Girl with asshole ex: Cuz she got big tiddies to prove

Girl with asshole ex: And that was wanda

Girl with asshole ex: So now u know my fridsn

Bonky: Still don’t know your name tho babe

Bonky: Also tell Wanda she shouldn’t give out this type of info to strangers

Girl with asshole ex: ure not a stranger anymore bonky

Girl with asshole ex: ure my babe nao

Bonky: I’m going to let that Bonky slide just bc u’re cute

Bonky: But I’m also going to stop replying until you tell me your name

Girl with asshole ex: U think im cute?

Girl with asshole ex:

Girl with asshole ex: I mean u havnt even seen me but thats fair

Girl with asshole ex: Wand and nat say its true so ill believe u rnt lying to me rn

Girl with asshole ex: But I wanna see if ure cute

Girl with asshole ex: Wait why r u up st 3 in the mrng I mean we re drunk but wht r u doing

Girl with asshole ex: Babe u need to take better care of urself

Girl with asshole ex: Babe

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: BABE?

Girl with asshole ex: Ph shit ure actually ignoring me

Girl with asshole ex: I dont like this

Girl with asshole ex: I actually like talking to u

Girl with asshole ex: Pls stop ignoring me

Girl with asshole ex: COME BACK AND LOBE ME

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: Fine

Girl with asshole ex: It’s Y/N

Bonky: Now, that wasn’t so hard was it?

Babe: fcuk u

Bonky: I’m up at 3 bc we ordered pizza and decided it’s time to beat Sam’s ass in Mario Kart once and for all

Babe: Nd how’s that going for ya?

Bonky: Bitch has been beating us for the past 3 hours

Bonky: Thor is the only one getting at least close to him now so we’re about to give up

Babe: Wait shit how r u replying so fast if ure playing Mario kart tho

Bonky: I gave up two hours ago

Babe: Quitter

Bonky: Just gotta know which fights to pick babe

Babe: Heads up I might be fallin asleep soon

Bonky: Drink some water before that, maybe get some food in u as well to soak up all the alcohol and have an advil close for tomorrow

Babe: Ok MOM

Bonky: Hey Wanda willingly told me you have “big tiddies” so your friends don’t seem to be doing a good job of taking care of you

Bonky: Might as well let me do it so you don’t die tmrw

Babe: Ohhhh so u careeeee babe im touched

Babe: Kkkkkk Ill talk tu u tmrw ill be dead soon

Babe: Nd I do have big tiddies

Bonky: Good night babe

Babe: What the shit

Bonky: I see you survived

Babe: Barely

Babe: My head might explode soon and I feel like I’ve vomited for an entire lifetime

Babe: TMI sorry

Bonky: I’d like to point out I’m glad I don’t have to decipher your texts anymore and that you can actually spell properly

Babe: Fuck you Buckaroo

Bonky: I would also like to remind you that I have on good authority that you have “big tiddies” so don’t make me use that against you

Babe: I am going to kill Wanda

Babe:Ugh I need coffee

Babe: I’ll talk to you later

Bonky: I’ll be waiting for you babe

Babe: So

Babe: BABE

Bonky: Yes baby?

Babe:

Bonky: Nah, you love it

Babe: Fine

Babe: You still haven’t sent a pic of you though. I might be able to rise Nat and Wanda from the dead if you do

Bonky: What do I get in return?

Babe: The promise that I will keep replying even though you might turn out to be an ugly orc?

Bonky: Not enough

Babe: Fine. I’ll keep talking to you until you want me to stop. Or until I get bored of you

Bonky: Eh, you can do better

Babe: What do you WANT?

Bonky: A pic of you in return

Babe: I’m not sending you nudes, perv

Bonky: If I wanted to see you naked and be a dick about it, I could’ve asked last night, don’t worry

Bonky: But if you’ll know how I look it’s only fair I should know how you look

Babe: That sounds reasonable

Bonky: I’d say it’s a fair exchange

Babe: Fine, you first then

Bonky: If you don’t send me a pic of you afterwards babe I will stop replying, just so you know

Bonky:

Babe: Did you type super hot guy with the most beautiful eyes in the world in Google or something?

Bonky: I’m touched but no. Sam took that photo at a work event

Babe: Bitch do you really expect me to believe this is you? That looks like a guy who just stepped out of a magazine, I highly doubt I would have the luck to text him instead of my ex when drunk

Bonky:

Bonky: Are you always this annoying?

Babe: …

Bonky: What? Do you want me to take a selfie with the fucking newspaper now? I read the news online babe, I’m not getting off of this couch just so I can buy a stupid newspaper to prove it’s me

Babe: Do you have one in a suit?

Bonky: …why am I putting up with this?

Bonky: Hold on

Bonky:

Bonky: It’s been 5 minutes, are you going to reply?

Bonky: You still have to send me a picture of you though, a deal is a deal you know

Bonky: Fine, I warned you

Babe: Shit sorry

Babe: Hi Bucky, this is Natasha

Bonky: Hi Natasha. Is Y/N alright?

Babe: Uhm how should I put this?

Babe: Y/N is crying right now and she can’t reply herself

Bonky: What? What happened? Is she okay?

Babe: Oh yeah

Babe: She’s just crying because (and I’m quoting here) you’re “so beautiful, it’s like all my wet dreams and fantasies have come together. I swear this is some cosmic joke, this is not happening”

Babe: I’m not sure if she’s laughing or crying now

Babe: But she keeps yelling at me that I have to send you the most perfect picture of herself that has ever existed or you will stop talking to her

Babe: I think she started crying again because “I will never live up to that level of perfection, he told me that I have to know which fights to pick”

Babe: Uh yeah so here

Babe: 1 Photo Attached

Bonky: Hey Nat, could you tell Y/N that I would like to talk to her now?

Babe: Sure

Babe: Hey

Bonky: Baby?

Babe: Yeah?

Bonky: You picked the wrong fight if you think “you will never live up to this level of perfection”

Babe: Oh God

Bonky: Stop being an idiot

Bonky: And listen to me

Bonky: I would really like to keep talking to you. Mainly because you’re an idiot who makes me laugh, but it’s also the fact that you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen in my entire life

Babe:

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes oneshot #social media au #bucky barnes social media au #bucky barnes au #social media #bucky barnes texts

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tonya-the-chicken · 4 years

Text

I wrote this post some time ago as a reply to someone and now I somehow want to post it again with some changes lol

TW: mentions of murder, referenced canon abuse and swearing

Let’s talk about redemption arcs and people’s overwhelming desire to punish fictional characters for what they did... Inspired by Endeavor hate ngl... I mostly speak about fictional charcters in this post so pllease, don’t go dumb and understand that fictional characters and irl people should be treated differently

I think sometimes people don`t understand why punishment exists in our society at all. Like, why couldn`t we just forgive? Why punishment is needed? Oh, I would like to talk about behavioural psychology, but it is kinda creepy so instead let`s remember what my teacher of LAWS said(idk what you call it in your bitchass America)

Punishment basically serves two functions:

Preventative (show others and a person that they can’t just get away with their deeds). Like, if you knew that there are no negative consequences, wouldn`t you do it? Wouldn`t you kill the old lady?

Correction and all work with a person in general (for example, you can be forced to go through some psychological help)

Also, I lied there’s one more: compensation. Like, if you stole something, then bring money back, you little shit. Or pay for therapy for your victim

So when we put it into stories and so popular nowadays redemption arcs (which I fucking adore if they are done correctly) we have 4 points out of this 3 cause the first one can be put into two

Character is punished to show others that this is not something you should do (it’s a kinda societal thing and has nothing to do with character in particular. This point in general is not interesting because it doesn’t drives changes in person by itself)

Character is punished so he himself would think twice before doing this shit again (we can’t know if person’s remorse is genuine so it’s better to simply scare them. But I can allow skipping this point if person’s remorse is clealy shown to be genuine and we as readers understand that. That’s probably the big distinction we, as readers, should see: while irl we never know persons true motives, work of fiction can provide them to us clearly)

Character changes and understands what is wrong in what he has done (the part of redemption we all love and enjoy)

Characters work hard to correct or atone for their mistakes

As we can see first two bullets has nothing to do with character development and serve for the purpose of maintaining order. The third one IS a character development and the last one is what makes people actually forgive horrible actions and not go ape shit I guess. But for some of us nothing is enough, isn`t it?

And there is one more shit that is often in redemption arcs and that shit is great and I fucking love it

Explanation of the character’s behaviour, their reasoning and motivation

I truly enjoy reading about WHY characters behave a certain way but people, remember, SAD BACKSTORY IS NEVER AN EXCUSE FOR YOUR ACTIONS. Same goes to your mental problems and hard life situation. The fact that behaviour can be explained doesn’t mean shit. Like, behaviour also follows certain laws and despite the fact that it’s sometimes hard to understand all the details we still theoretically can explain ANY BEHAVIOUR. Does this mean we can excuse any behaviour? HELL NO

So remember folks, “They had their reasons to do this” means nothing most of the time. “I wanted to try how it feels” is actually a valid reason to kill someone, you know. Of course, if crimes is not severe, reasoning suddenly can be very important like we won`t punish harshly someone who stole bread cause he is starving or cause he has kleptomania (I mean as a literal disorder). But even in that case you must pay back money cause like stealing is bad but eat the rich

let`s talk examples from bnha cause why not

Endeavour

We have Enji oh my baby you have done so much stupid shit you dumbass. Sad backstory even if will be brought up in the future, currently is not a focus of redemption at all. Like, he even doesn`t explain his behaviour too much. “He want to be the strongest, so he decided that even if his genes will make it to the top it will be enough. As a result, blinded by his goal, he abused his family”. Basically, it`s all the explanation we have right now. And if Hori stops at it I will be fine with it. Honestly, as much as I want to learn more about Enji’s past if Horikoshi leaves everything at this I would give him nothing but mad respect cause... This kind of shows that your reasoning doesn’t matter that much if you did horrifying things

So 3 points to redeem someone

Enji didn’t suffer any punishment for his actions (nightmares are considered punishment only if you believe in God. Also, too weak, God, try harder... And same goes for High-End). When I think about him being punished I actually worry about society’s reaction cause, like, he is number 1 hero and the fact that he’s an abuser will be, like, very shocking to simple people.Trust in hero will fall harder than my will to live during 2020. And honestly, media would just turn this into a drama possibly hurting other members of his family, like.... Enji being legally punished for his action would be an interesting plotline but in general I am not a fan

We see his genuine remorse and character growth. We all agree that he even is drawn differently now changed and trying to become a better person, yeah? Clumsily at first, but he genuinely works hard to be a better peron, hero and father. I can respecct that

Compensation… Well, you can exactly “correct” trauma so he should pay up for psychologists for each child he probably should follow the path of atonement and try to give them something he robbed them from. Like, go to family dinners with Fuyumi even though every last one of them is a disaster and nobody is happy to be there. Or make everything possible to provide Rei calm life with her children (like building a new house, yes, this is an amazing thing) or at least become *reducted cause I wanna this post to be serious and SFW*... Tbh I have nothing to say, he himself says multiple times that he seeks nothing but atonment, not even forgiveness

So like you better work bitch to make your family happy bastard... [And tbh they seem so much better then when I first wrote this post, I am so proud of you, my garbage fire man]

Overhaul

In no way is he redeemed but somehow people put Overhaul and Endeavor stans in the same category so here he goes

Kai has something Enji doesn’t: very good and detailed explanation, a plan, a smart reasoning. His wrong deeds were basically for a better good he believed in. But we all collectively hate him for what he done to Eri despite his actions having r E A S o n S. Dude has some MOTIVATION. So like yeah bros. It makes him an interesting character and he is an amazing villain but dude deserves to rot in prisons. He shows no remorse and I am gonna bet he won`t even think about somehow helping others. Dude is a shitty person. And I fucking love him

So let’s go for our 3 bullets again

Punishment. Yes, he is punished, he is in jail with both his hands cut off. Would it make people forgive him? Nah

Personal growth. I would like to see it but as far we saw barely no growth... Though maybe being in jail without quirk will make his brain work

Atonement... Dude has a Messiah complex, I ain’t waiting for that anytime soon

So I asked myself if I had two men: one who spent a sentence in jail for child abuse but is more or less the same person and another who wasn’t punished for his abuse but feel genuine remorse and actively try to make things better who will I choose? Of course, I will choose Pikachu

But is it possible to redeem Overhaul? I wonder if there`s a force in this world strong enough to make him become a better person. Welp... I am a sucker for redemptions, justt letting you know

All for One

Oh, he is irredeemable (and this is sexy). Why is he here? Cause, well

Even if he is punished there`s no punishment severe enough to describe how horrifying his deeds are

Even if he is to feel remorse… he has like 500 years or something??? And he didn`t feel anything killing people??? So why would he change today?

Even if he atone for what he’s done… I am to believe he started at least a civil war. You can`t atone for that bitch. You crossed all fucking lines, all fucking lines

AfO is literally the most evvil man in bnha... I don’t want to see him redeemed cause I love characters that are pure evil and I love the despair of realizing you can’t fix what you have done. Though you are free to have a different opinion! Who knows, maybe Horikoshi will make a classy redemption for him and I will scream out of excitement? Cause I am that kind of bitch??? Who knows! I just love to think Doctor Ujiko is gay for him

Anyway, why do people like to make this characters suffer? Like, Endeavor, Minoru, Overhaul, many others? Is this part of the “punishment” to feel like person paid for their deeds? Or do people just like fictional violence and punishing “bad” characters make them feel good about themselves? Who knows

I have no idea what this post is about I want to sleep and I like Enji though if you dislike him this is fine. I hope it was interesting reading this, love you all bye

Don’t kill me for my controversial takes, I am depressed

#overhaul #endeavor #all for one #redemption arc #bnha #bnha meta #yea I do classify my bullshit post as meta BYYE #bnha endeavor #bnha overhaul #enji todoroki #kai chisaki #boku no hero academia #don't take this too seriously though #original post was written when I was on heavy meds #so idk #my post #really hope you enjoy it #long post

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wibbylard · 5 years

Text

I can’t sleep so here’s a story about a hamster I used to have

When I was like 7 my family had a pet hamster named Judy. Judy was a panda hamster who was fat as hell and would hiss and bite at you every time you went to touch her. She looked a lot like this:

Judy lived in this boujee muthafuckin hamster palace. The bitch had like 4 penthouses and a huge ass wheel all to herself and would STILL complain. It was literally the trump tower of hamster houses. She was always getting stuck climbing up to her wheel because of her chunky hamster ass. This isn’t the exact house Judy lived in but it’s close. All that’s missing is the gold judy sign out front.

Well one night before bed my parents went to give Judy some food and The Bitch Was Gone. Like, nowhere to be found in her throne. So my parents freak out because we had just got a cat who was always very interested in Judy. So they start looking all over the house trying to find this fuckin evil fury rat. (All of my siblings and I were asleep bc it was like 11pm, and I was probably dreaming about My Little Pony or some shit.) My mom was nine months pregnant at the time, btw. Like an hour or two goes by and my parents still can’t find Judy. My mom is crawling around with a watermelon belly looking for this mean ass hamster who didn’t appreciate anything we did for her bitchass, and they still can’t find her. So they decide to go to bed, saying that they’ll look for her again tomorrow. As soon as my mom gets in the bed she hears this hissing noise from under the bed. She jumped up and crouched down with her 9 month pregnant belly and is making direct eye contact with Judy. Being the southern woman my mother is, she looks at the hamster, snaps her fingers and tells Judy to “get your ass over here.” Judy walks toward my PREGNANT ASS MOTHER’s hand and bites the shit out of her. Like my mom’s hand is now gushing blood because of Judy’s fuckin bitchass. My dad SNAPS and takes a tobaggan/beanie/knitted hat (please don’t come for me, this is a story about a hamster for gods sake) and shoves Judy in the hat. My dad makes his way outside to the backyard and says “Judy you are a bitch and you know it. Thanks for your time as the worst pet in our household, but your time has come” and creates a slingshot and catapults Judy out of the hat and over the fence, her screeching through the air.

He hears her hit the ground and scurries away. The story does not end there. This huge ass fuckin owl comes out of nowhere and scoops Judy up, she’s screaming her little bitchass hamster head off within the talons of this owl as it carries her off into the moonlight.

And that’s the story of a bitch who had it coming.

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dotunsblog · 6 years

Photo

It ain't ever easy being an #INFJ. Other people's feelings don't ever go away. They shit on you cuz they can & give a fuck less. Never think they're wrong, but for me they all a test. I've been battered, bastardly since birth. I hunch when I walk, like I forgot my worth. Construct psychotically, because I'm fueled by hurt And I'm here to turn the tables & reclaim this Earth! Everyone is always right & more than me. According to them, I shouldn't even be. Because I refuse to be subdued, they blackball me. #StillIRise & could give a fuck less - epically! #BlackAngel, hell fuming, straight unleash the rage. I give them an evil they dunno the stage. In an evil world, divinity obliterates. I'm beating them at their own game, so me they hate. Life could be worse, I could be holistically fucked up like my sister. There to teach me, 'Don't be like that, mister!' And I thank God I don't earn her figures. She's 'successful' - but what a fucked up nigga! So I #brood once again. Can't keep on taking evil from within. My inner circle needs to be safe from evil & tight. Can't be taking hits then hurt at night. My #InnerBeast is tired of my bitchass self. Either wreck havoc or run shit stealth. If bullshit is in my ends then get rid of it. Take the shit they give me? They wouldn't even think it. Now is my time, I'm meant to be happy. Let the bitch stay White, I'm Black like nappy Is my hair & I stay #BlackAfrican for life. Apparently I'm a loser but I'm not the one who got dumped on the way to becoming a wife. So successful! Muthafuckaz always irk that #DarkAngel in me. But fuck 'em, I'm just tryna be. ...gotta politically correct myself, other people may see. Just another day in the life of D-O-T. Tired of people fuckin' with me. So I merge with my beast, no I in we! #FuckWithMe!! #DigitalArt #DigitalPublishing #DigitalArtistry #Drawing #DramaQueens #FFS #Illustration #Loko #Brooding #FineArt #HarnessingAnger #Creativity #CreativeSpirit #RunWithAbandon #Shedding #SpiritualGift #ImYourFuckingRadarAndYouDontEvenKnowIt https://www.instagram.com/p/BnzPMgLlHfd/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=xr6jduwh5dby

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toripar · 4 years

Text

"YoU kNoW wHo" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

"KAAAAAAAJUUUUUU!"

"Holy sh- HESTIA, HESTIA"

Reblog with an inside joke you have with your friends.

“Yes, Captain America has LEGS!”

#a stuff #shit stuff #bout me #:)#rimi talks a lot #rimi.txt

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felinehypocritical · 7 years

Note

Maybe something about stoncy reuniting after being apart for their first semester of college?? that stuff is always so cute

here you go! I love these 2 so much and I’m gonna go ahead and dedicate this fic to @ghost-grantaire bc i know how much she loves those dorks

Nancy let out a sigh, dropping her bags at the stairs leading up to her old room.

She was /home/.

Well, not quite.

She still hadn’t seen Jon or Steve- so should she truly call this house a home? Could she say she was where she was supposed to be if she didn’t see two of the three boys who meant the most to her? Jonathan and Steve were everything to her. Well… almost everything.

And then the third everything came around the corner, bedraggled and sleepy-eyed, and Nancy forgot about her boyfriends for a while.

“MIKE!” She practically yelled it, grabbing her younger brother in a hug so tight he seriously gasped for breath. Spinning him around, she smiled so big she was just about sure her teeth were going to crack under the pressure, and he began his round of complaints.

“Oh, gross-OUT!” He yelled. “Put me down, you smell like cheap perfume! Let me go!” Smiling devilishly, and just to cause trouble with her favorite brother in the world, she pressed her poofy hair into his face and help his face there, both tenderly and with great force.

He pushed her off- when had her skinny kid brother gotten stronger, she thought- and glared lovingly at her. He finally hugged her tighter than she got possible, and very nearly lifted her up. She thought dimly of the myth- was it a myth?- that a woman whose baby was about to be killed could deadlift a car out of sheer adrenaline and energy. Was that what Mike was experiencing right now? She hoped to God. She didn’t know how she’d cope if her brother was stronger than she herself was. It was bad enough he was three inches taller.

“Good evening to you, too, my darling baby brother,” she cooed.

He made a face, before checking his calculator-watch and saying smugly, “it’s actually 1 in the morning, Nance. So.”

“Well, you’re a pretentious little bitchass nerd. So.” She felt her blood begin to boil amidst the fires of affection, and she looked at her brother defiantly. He always thought he was the smart one. Well, guess who’d finished her midterms with flying colors, in all advanced classes? Teach him to be all high and mighty. They were both smart. She began to feel genuinely annoyed, the old flames of rivalry igniting, until Mike let out a yawn that made his baby-face look still younger, and she felt her heart melt again.

“Well, anyway,” Mike said boredly. “Your boytoys are upstairs if you want. In my old room.” The way he said old told Nancy he desired questioning, but she refused to ask.

“They’re not my boytoys.”

Mike waved a hand flippantly. “Sex toys, boytoys, they’re all the same, aren’t they?” He stuck out his tongue, ducking her slapping hands, and giggled, hopping the steps down to the basement double-quick.

“Where’s Mom?” Nancy called down the stairs, only half expecting an answer.

Over the sounds of Bowie and The Smiths, she heard a faint, “out,” before it was lost amidst her brother’s friend’s giggles and chatter.

Nancy stood, in the foyer of a house she used to call her home, and felt more alone than she ever had. Mike had grown up so, so much since they’d last seen each other. He was fifteen now, and he was nearing six feet tall, and his lanky frame seemed to be filling out with newfound cords of muscle- not big enough to notice, certainly, unless you were Nancy, who noticed everything and had seen Mike last when he was still cracking his voice. He also, she noticed, had grown out of his voice cracking. All gone, and she’d missed the last of it. The last remnants of time to tease her baby brother were gone, because she’d chosen to go to college.

You see, college wasn’t a question of Where for the Wheelers- it was a question of If and When. Karen Wheeler had gone to college for child psychology, and dropped out when her now-divorced husband had come along. She never finished it, and had, in fact, started that education a year late. She took a year off from school between college and high school, giving up her many scholarships for a trip to Europe. That was her choice, and she chose it and stuck by it. They had the money, surely, and the smarts in abundance, but they also had years and years of history of formally uneducated women in a time where that was common. Karen’s mother, Pat Goldblum, had been the perfect model of a housewife. She’d never dreamed of education, but she’d done the best she could with what she had and given Karen a slightly better life. Nancy had made it clear she WOULD be going to college, on time, and seeing it through to the end- but now she was having doubts. She loved her family, her friends, her two loving partners. How could she give that up to go to a med school in the big city?

So there she stood, fighting back tears, the realization washing over her that she had missed so much in such a short amount of time. How much had happened in those five months? A LOT, apparently! She felt a hot tear run down her cheek, and she choked it back. No crying. Not now.

Just then, a tall, broader boy padded down the stairs quietly and came up behind Nancy. His rough hands went over her eyes with a gentleness she quickly recognized, and she whipped around with a smile on her face.

“Jon!” She wrapped him up in a bear-hug tight enough to trap Houdini, and began peppering his face with kisses, saying between that that “I- missed- you both- so- much, you- don’t- even know.” The last kiss landed on his lips, and was long and sweet and as good as can be. Jonathan smiled, putting his hands on her small waist and lifting her up so he was half-carrying, half dragging her up the stairs.

“Hey, Nancy,” he said shyly, rubbing her back and setting her on a futon she recognized as the one Barb used to use when she wasn’t sharing Nancy’s bed.

She glared lovingly at him. “Don’t be so formal, Byers! Be nice! Be relaxed! Be-”

“Be like me!”

Nancy recognized that voice, too, and turned to see Steve standing in the doorway, arms crossed much like they had been on the night they’d first kissed. She smiled like a kid in the biggest, best, cheapest candy store in the galaxy as she looked between them, drinking them all in.

Jonathan hadn’t gotten any taller, still scraping five eleven, but he certainly was broader. She heard he’s begun taking up football on the side, and the wiry frame of his teenage years was… basically gone. He had rounded, wide shoulders and a broad chest, and he looked solid enough to carry her across a bridge one-handed. She felt safe just looking at him in his pajama t-shirt and boxers. Steve, on the other hand, was as tall and lanky was ever. He’d hit his fourth growth spurt by a stroke of luck (or evil, depending on if you were Joyce, who needed help reaching jars, or Jonathan, who loved feeling stronger) that year, and he was two inches taller than his boyfriend by then. He was thin and lanky, unbelievably so, his figure filled out solely by the baggy shirt that HAD to be Jonathan’s that he was wearing and minimal muscles from the swim team he was on. All in all, Nancy was thoroughly pleased with how they were looking after almost half a year of fending for themselves.

“Hi,” she said breathlessly, holding Steve’s hand as if he would float away like a balloon, and pulling him onto the bed next to her. Her eyes never left his face.

“Hey, Nance. What’s cookin’, good lookin’?” He said it in faux flirtation, and she broke up laughing.

The other’s soon joined in, and they all began setting to work building a cuddling nest for three on the small mattress. They made quick work of it, and soon were laying together. Steve was in the middle, as usual, Nancy curled against his chest as Jonathan spooned them both from behind. Steve smiled into Nancy’s hair.

“You smell like a sorority, Nancy.”

She wrinkled her nose at her taller boyfriend. “I hate you, just so you know.”

Steve feigned surprise. “Why, of course! We all hate each other here! We all hate each other so much, we want to marry each other just to ruin each other’s lives!”

Jonathan shushed them both, and they lapsed back into comfortable silence, before Jonathan said: “Nancy, why were you crying downstairs?”

“Crying?” She said instantaneously, “I wasn’t crying!”

“Yes, you were.” Jonathan looked at her with the eyes of a man who planned on following someone to the ends of the universe. “Please tell us, Nance.”

Nancy sniffed, saying, “I… I dunno. I guess I just feel like… I’m missing so much, you know? I don’t feel like I know anything about you guys anymore. I hate it. I want to feel connected, and-” She was cut off by a small sob that she swallowed with great pain.

Jonathan was rubbing circles into the back of her hand, and said soothingly, “hey, hey, it’s okay. We’re all in college, remember? We don’t see each other at all, but you know what? I still love you guys more than anything I’ve ever loved before. We’re gonna be together as long as I can muster it, okay? So don’t worry, Nance. Don’t give up on your degree.” She shared a look with Steve, saying, “that’s the last thing we want.”

“But-”

“Nancy.” Jonathan’s eyes we grave. “Now is not the time.”

Steve nodded, kissing Nancy on the cheek. He sensed the tension, and broke it up the only way he knew how.

“Gee, Jonny, you love us more than ANYTHING? Maybe even, I dunno…” He pretended to look deep in thought. “The Clash?”

“No, I’m sorry,” Jonathan laughed, a deep rumble that made Steve’s back explode in the same magical sparks he got inside whenever Jonathan or Nancy touched him. “Joe Strummer is my first and only love.”

“Well, fine,” Steve said jovially, “but save a place for me to sit after Nancy and I crash the wedding.”

Jonathan grinned into Steve’s hair, pecking his crown thoughtfully. “Your face and my ass, Harrington.”

“Harrington-Byers-Wheeler,” Steve corrected, nuzzling into Jonathan’s touch.

Nancy looked on in bemusement, feeling a warmth grow in her chest as she watched her boyfriends bicker. She felt safe in the knowledge of their relationship, and in the fact that she knew they’d support her through anything.

And she’d do likewise for her boys, too.

#stranger things #jonathan byers #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #stoncy #stanny.txt

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