see the thing about Astarion to me is I don't actually think he has a clue who he actually is beneath all of the everything he's got going on. he's got impulses, he's got drive, a will to live, he's got desires and amusements and cravings, but an actual selfhood?? no. there's a blue error screen where the person of him should be, the person -- whoever that was, I'm personally of the mind he likely wasn't good then either, but we'll see where the story takes us -- before Cazador. the man in front of us today is this mishmash of interior delight at freedom and sunlight but also capable of true unapologetic cruelty and willingness to be ugly in a multitude of ways. so he follows the impulse. he follows what intrigues and amuses, and nothing will take that freedom from him again. and he reflects back onto others the violence that was done unto him. a lack of power kept him down? now he wants to accumulate power, so it can never be turned on him again. but he also misses the sun while he's underground. he's mean and desperate and ruthless and it's interesting because he's unapologetic about it, he's unflinching about it. he's vindictive and mean and desperately floundering around throwing stuff at a wall to see what sticks in terms of personhood because who is he now. 200 years of horrific servitude and now he's just out and about and he's in the mud.
and he can be horrible. and yet when you take the routes of prying open the faaairly shallow veneer he has of smug and snark and snappiness, he'll give you pieces of the raw and the desperate -- "I want to know what the world sees when it looks at me. what you see." is a line you only get if you're earnest with him. any other path in the dialogue will have him continue the shallow persona you've come to know. and in all of that I think nothing is "this is real, this is an act," set in stone because I just don't think he even knows, I don't think he has a CLUE what's his and what's the protective measures and what's the real delight and what's the cruel mockery of his surroundings and what he's willing to give vs what he needs to hide vs what he lets slip out on accident. the inconsistencies in his own ideas and what he says and what he does. I think most everything about him is in a weird place of deeply uncertain. is it a lie? is it a glimmer of truth? for me, I like to interpret him in this weird menagerie of half-truths and shallow lies and omissions, because we've only known him a short while and maybe also he doesn't even know the answer yet. who is he? fuck if HE knows. anyways. smash.
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neuvillette's lore is actually insane. we all took one look at him and went "haha dragon🫵" but i significantly underestimated how big of a role he would play. he's the incarnation of the original hydro sovereign. he took back his rule right under the heavenly principles' nose. he's the one handing out hydro visions now (not even because he has to, he doesn't, he just grew so fond of humanity that he chooses to). he gave away the hydro gnosis bc he straight up doesn't need it. he's planning to DETHRONE ALL OF THE ARCHONS (in a few hundred years, when the traveler's not around to see it, so it won't be awkward for them). he's kind and soft-spoken. he's full of vengeful rage. he's a father to hundreds. he found his purpose after feeling lost for 500 years. skirk pulled him aside for a super-secret convo and when he saw us again he immediately spilled the tea. as far as i can tell, he spawned into existence fully formed. no other character can fucking compare
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Random thoughts about Dead Friend Forever episode 9:
Damn! I was waiting for today to get this new episode and I wasn't disappointed. It was such a ride again.
▪️ First of all, we need to talk about Tan... or should I say New?! Of course, it wasn't exactly a surprise because many people already guessed he was Non's brother, but we just didn't know who he was until now. I guess he looked pretty bland in the first episodes and then when we got to the flashback we didn't see him yet because he wasn't among the group when they bullied Non. Who would have thought, he would lied about his age to get in school, lied to his parents about being in England and basically being the mastermind behind the revenge against the group? I thought Phee would be the mastermind because he wanted to avenge the man he loved, but he was merely a follower. Tan/New is the one who wants revenge and he won't stop until he gets to know the truth. He doesn't mind pretending to be someone else and drugging all of them just to have answers. He is kind of unhinged and it's pretty understandably because he lost everything. I felt so bad for him because he feels guilty about not being a good brother enough to Non, but also not being a good enough son when he decided to lie to his parents to continue his quest in learning the truth. He doesn't know how to cope with the loss and the grieve he feels too (he lost his all family, how can you deal with that?!). It was heartbroken to see him slowly falling into madness because of all those emotions.
▪️ This episode not only centered around Tan/New and his family but also around Phee and his complicated relationship with Jin and Non. We saw that Phee avoided Non after he caught him with cop Keng. It took him a while to cool down before deciding to find Non and discovering his disappearance. That's how he met Tan/New who knew Non and Phee had a thing. They decided to team up to find the truth after reading the script he wrote for the short movie and how different it was from the final production. In this episode, Phee looked more like a follower into Tan/New's quest. He wants to know the truth but he is also torn between this revenge and his growing feelings for Jin. Indeed, he became close to him because he noticed how Jin reacted every time they mentioned Non but it is shown he started to feel something too. Even Tan noticed it and Phee had to brush it off by saying he still loves and misses Non. It must have been hard for him. I don't think caring for Jin meant he didn't care for Non. However, it is sure Tan/New would have not like it. So Phee rejected Jin by saying they were just friends, hurting his feeling. Too bad for Jin, he also learnt at that time about the fake news (because it is fake) about Non and Keng.
▪️ I know Jin did some really bad things to Non. He never really helped him when he was bully by the others and he filmed him (even if he didn't posted online, it was still a bad move). I almost forgot but he also lied about Non, not being with them (stupid move again). The story is not trying to paint him as a saint but at the same time, you can see it is also trying to make us like him. At least, it is working with me. I still feel really bad for Non. Poor Non never deserve anything that happened to him. However, I still want Jin to be able to redeem himself in any way. He had an instant attraction to Phee the first time he saw him (which I understand because Ta Nannakun is very handsome). He felt hard for him. Phee took him to the same lake he went with Non and that's where he told Jin he only bring people he likes over there . Even if at that time they were still "friends" I think it made Jin feel like he had a chance to become boyfriends. It led to their NC scene which was fierce. They were also a little kinky (Jin, I didn't know you weren't only vanilla). Good for them! After that, Phee became distant to Jin and to avoid being hurt they stopped being close until the present time where they went to Por's house.
▪️ In the present time, Phee almost told the truth to Jin. They still have lingering feelings for each other. It seems like it is eating away Phee's mind and Jin still don't understand why they can't be more. I almost choked when he thought Phee had something with Tan. Yeah they are working together to know what your group of a****** friends did to Non, but their relationship is strictly professional, don't worry Jin. That's where Jin started to hallucinate again, still feeling deeply guilty about Non. Phee didn't get to tell him the truth. I can't wait to know how he will react and what impact it is going to have for their relationship. I believe they are supposed to be end-game, but the series surprised me a lot so the dice are not cast, yet.
▪️ Back into the present time where Top drug-induced was beating Tee up until White (long time no see precious baby!) knocked him out. At the same time, Tan is fighting against Fluke who was also drugged. Basically everyone is drugged because it was Tan's plan all along so they would reveal the truth. I laughed when Phee asked Tan/New "This is not deadly, isn't it?" and it answered "This won't kill them". Guess what Por, you're just collateral damage. Opps! Well, he won't be missed. Tan/New probably didn't anticipating his little experience with hallucinating herbs would end up this way. It shows you must really think of everything before taking things into your own hands. The plan is not going into the right direction. It worked too well. They were really scared and thought they were cursed. So, is the killer real or is it just hallucination? If it's the case... does it mean the driver is not really dead? If he is dead, does it mean Tan/New created this trap and killed him? I'm not sure Tan/New thought about really killing anyone... Otherwise how could he get his answer?
The noose is tightening as we approach the end of the series. The next episode won't come out fast enough. I already can't wait to know the rest of the story.
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Do you think Prism after IEYTD3 would do anything to honor the rest of her robots who didn't escape the factory explosion
Oh absolutely. She loved those silly little guys! She dedicated so much work, time and effort to make them real and they were there with her and she loved every single one of them. She didn't have to get attached, after all they were just another project, but she chose to love and appreciate them as they were. She was probably under the assumption that they'd outlive her, being robots and all, but that explosion definitely crushed her heart. I don't know if she could find it in her to make another robot after that.
I think if she finds time to slow down after the third game's end, she'd let herself properly grieve her loss and honor their memory. Probably something that involves a spare part that she brought with her, a core, a bit of kinesium...but yeah.
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Kit, kit kit!!! In the couples counseling AU what would a anakin do if Obi-Wan seriously started considering dating someone else for real? Or like, what if Ashoka starts introducing potential partners for Obi-Wan?!
oooo what a question ok
i think honestly anakin would be able to rationalize it to himself after some very late night pacing. he would think ah yes this is great because obi-wan my most beloved master deserves more than casual one night stands in the lower levels with people who don't know to touch him worshipfully after all his body has been through and done for the republic and the galaxy. it's the people sleeping with obi-wan, that's the problem! that's what anakin doesn't like! obi-wan deserves to be vulnerable and feel safe with someone, he deserves someone to kiss up and down the lightning scars decorating his chest, the saber wound scar on his thigh, the freckles over his shoulders, the---
ANYWAY, what anakin means to say is it's a GREAT idea for obi-wan to start dating around. he deserves to find someone like anakin's angel.
of course, for safety concerns, anakin will need to meet them immediately and vet them to make sure their intentions are true and pure when it comes to his master. it's very important they pass the anakin test before spending alone time with his master. that's his master.
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