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smalltownfae · 1 year

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Top 10 Favourite Middle Grade Books

I say middle grade, but I am including young YA too and at least one that is categorized as for children. Either way, this is my current top favourite books for younger audiences (I would say before the age of 15). I have read some of these many years ago and I haven’t reread them since so this is according to my memory of the feelings I had at the time. It is bound to change as I read more books. I don’t read many books for younger audiences nowadays, but I think they are charming and I have a soft spot for those published before the 00s because it feels nostalgic to me somehow.

1 - Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones

This is one of my favourite books in general. It would be in my top 10 favourite books of all time because I love the Howl, Sophie and the humour so much. I’ve watched the studio ghibli adaptation first and even though I thought it was beautiful visually I ended up thinking the story just ok and I found it weird that the second half was so much different from the first half of the movie. A few years later, a friend that loves Realm of the Elderlings made me attempt the book and since we have many media tastes in common I did. It was the best decision ever because I completely loved it. The characters have so much more personality and the story makes much more sense.

The book is about Sophie’s character growth, but Howl feels as equally important. It is very funny and I love the banter between the two main characters, but it’s also very creative and a little bit mysterious. It’s such an incredibly well plotted story about making your own destiny and finding your own power and it’s also about family and caring for others. It’s just a very charming book that I read 3 times already even though I read it for the first time only 3 years ago or so. It’s also really short so that helps.

“If I give you a hint and tell you it's a hint, it will be information.”

2 - The Chronicles of Prydain by Lloyd Alexander

I read this series of 5 books last year and this year I finished the short story collection. This series feels very nostalgic to me because it has many classic fantasy tropes. It’s a coming of age story about a boy named Taran that wants to go on adventures, but when he finds himself in the middle of that he just longs to go home and it’s also a story about magic leaving the world and the pain of those who left and those who stay. A very classic tale with some similarities to Lord of the Rings, beautifully told and it feels very cosy. It’s also inspired by Welsh mythology and it has morals woven into it for children, but done in a clever way.

I know I watched the Disney adaptation titled the Black Cauldron once as a kid, but I don’t remember anything about it because I didn’t care for the movie. From what I’ve heard they made a mess of trying to combine the first two books and it lost the charm of the source material.

“There is much to be known… and above all much to be loved, be in the turn of the seasons or the shape of a river pebble. Indeed, the more we find to love, the more we add to the measure of our hearts.”

3 - The Changeling Sea by Patricia A. McKillip

This is the only McKillip book I read that I think is suited for younger audiences. The other ones feel like older YA to me. A friend made me see the similarities this book has with Howl’s Moving Castle in terms of plot, but this book is not as funny. It is sad and sometimes melodramatic. It follows a young girl that lost her father to the sea as she gets involved in the mystery surrounding a prince. The girl works at an inn near the sea and I found the setting very cosy. The story is magical and tackles the subjects of greed, identity and family.

A lot of McKillip’s books feel like original fairy tales and are told in a lyrical prose. This is one of the most straight forward and easy to follow out of all her books.

“I don’t know what to do. What must I do? I belong to the sea and it will not let me in, and I cannot bear this land and it will not let me go.”

4 - The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle

I enjoy the movie (which I once again watched many years before I read this), but I like the book more. The writing style is beautiful and the story, much like McKillip’s books, feels like an original fairy tale. It follows a unicorn that overhears that she is the last of her kind so she goes on an adventure to see if that’s true. She finds some companions along the way and there is an evil guy. On the surface, it’s a traditional fantasy story, but it has some little changes that make it more interesting. Once again, it’s a story about identity (I really like those) and can be a bit melodramatic.

“Take me with you. For laughs, for luck, for the unknown. Take me with you.”

5 - The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame

This book could be higher if it wasn’t for Mr. Toad. I really didn’t like him or the plot around him, but I love everything else so much that it is still currently in 5th place. The writing in this is really pretty and charming and the animal characters are adorable for the most part. I don’t even tend to like books about anthropormorphic animals, but since this one worked so well for me that I want to try more of those.

This is a story about the lives of four wood creatures. That’s it. It doesn’t seem like much, but I always enjoyed slice of life and scenes where the characters just talk and reveal bits of themselves so this was great. There is a lot of thinking about having a home and if it would be more fullfilling to stay in one place or to go on an adventure.

This book is put in all the cottagecore recommendation lists and for a good reason. It’s really nice and comfortable like a warm blanket (if you forget Mr. Toad exists, that is).

“Spring was moving in the air above and in the earth below and around him, penetrating even his dark and lowly little house with its spirit of divine discontent and longing.”

6 - His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman

So, this could be higher if the two books that followed the first one were as good. The first one is still my favourite, but I still enjoyed the other two (especially one particular scene in the last book). The first one was the only book in this trilogy to make me tear up though and books that make me cry usually get on the top of my lists. It’s just the way it is. I don’t think this one needs an introduction. The themes about religion are cool and I love Lyra and her mother.

Once again, I watched the movie first and I didn’t hate it (which seems to be an unpopular opinion). A few years after I decided to try the books because someone reminded me of their existence and they were pretty good. This placement in the top is mostly due to that first one though.

“The idea hovered and shimmered delicately, like a soap bubble, and she dared not even look at it directly in case it burst. But she was familiar with the way of ideas, and she let it shimmer, looking away, thinking about something else.”

7 - The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams Bianco

This is probably the book I read the longest time ago on this list, except from the one in 10th place. All I remember about it is that the Velveteen Rabbit wanted so much to be a real rabbit and that it made me cry. I definitely need to reread it, but I remember really really liking it at the time.

“You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.”

8 - Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery

I only read the first one and I am unsure if I will ever continue. If I do I will have to reread it. I remember really liking it, but it had heavy religious messages here and there. The tv show improved upon it. Still, it had a pretty writing style and the characters were really charming. I loved Anne and her adoptive “parents”, Diana and Gilbert. This is also another book that would fit in cottagecore lists. It has a similar atmosphere to The Wind in the Willows.

“People laugh at me because I use big words. But if you have big ideas, you have to use big words to express them, haven't you?”

9 - Coraline by Neil Gaiman

I remember the movie more than I remember the book, to be honest. I know that there were differences between the original and the adaptation but I only remember a few things. This was an interesting creepy tale and I liked it a bit more than The Graveyard Book so here it is. I need to reread this one soon.

“Now you people have names. That's because you don't know who you are. We know who we are, so we don't need names.”

10 - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

I haven’t read this one since primary school. I remember really liking it though and there was a fox in it, which was enough for child me. It had some really cute messages about connecting with others and I remember vaguely that every planet the little prince talked about had his own moral message, but I only remember the greed one. This is another book I want to reread soon.

“In those days, I didn't understand anything. I should have judged her according to her actions, not her words. She perfumed my planet and lit up my life. I should never have run away! I ought to have realized the tenderness underlying her silly pretensions. Flowers are so contradictory! But I was too young to know how to love her.”

#top 10 favourite books #top middle grade books #howl's moving castle #the chronicles of prydain #the last unicorn #the changeling sea #the wind in the willows #the little prince #coraline #anne of green gables #his dark materials #the velveteen rabbit #andi recs

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docholligay · 8 months

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House in Fata Morgana: The First Door--1603

I have never reviewed a visual novel before, but @iscahwynn made me a very generous offer and a long line of patience, knowing that we are trying something very new. To that end: Please don’t spoil me for the game at all! If you are reading this, I have only gotten through the part written above, and I don’t want to be corrected, even if I’m wrong, even if I’ve missed something, i don’t want to have anything confirmed or denied, and I don’t need any trigger warnings or extraneous explanation. Iscah would like my pure, naive experience of the game. Thank you!

Non-Spoilery: Holy shit, I don’t think I have consumed a visual novel with this kind of fervor. In fact, the only other visual novel I think of where I was like, ‘I have to keep reading what happens” was We Know the Devil, and while I would say that game whups on this one prose-wise (I can’t relate to a lot of what people love about WNTD, but holy shit was the prose some of the most beautiful game stuff I have ever read. I wished the whole time it was a short story or novella instead. Still do!) this one has a lot of plot driving through it and the writing is also very strong--I am used to a certain amount of ‘anime gotta anime’ writing styles, and there is none of that here.

Spoilers below

I love a story that rewards patience. I could see some people saying that this moves too slowly, but I like to read a Meaty Tome, and so it doesn’t bother me to have to deal with a certain amount of setup, especially because I know this is a collection of short stories, sure, but it’s a collection of short stories taht are all driving at an ending. It might not even be fair to call them short stories so much as…episodes, maybe? I don’t know, they are connected but years apart. I guess i’m actually spitballing too much for having actually not played beyond chapter one.

So i am 98.6% sure we are in England (please don’t tell me!) Given the references to the Thirty Years’ War, the Golden Age, and winter being a rainy season, all packed into one. Also Rhodes is a British name. I might be wrong but I would be surprised if I were.

How do I organize this “progress reviewlet” or whatever I want to call it? Let’s just go with the flow.

Again, I love that this is unvoiced. It makes the game read so much more like a book to me, which makes me consume it voraciously, and also doesn’t take me out of the moment. Intensely aware that I am in the minority here, but when I’m reading something that I think probably takes place in late Elizabethan England, and I’m hearing Japanese, it takes me out of the immersion and it’s more like watching an anime, which is fine but doesn’t light up the same center of my brain, generally. Actually, the same would be true if it were English. I can’t mainline the story and let it play out in my mind the way it does when I read it. I read this like I do a visual novel, I barely pay attention to the art except in the “where is everyone standing” way, and that’s not even very helpful for this. So in reading it like a book, I feel like I saw Mell slap Nellie, I feel like I saw the light cross the White Haired Girl’s face as she failed to strangle Mell. It just makes the whole thing more immersive for me.

Speaking of Nellie, what a wild ride that was. I mean, we knew something was going to be up with Nellie’s level of spoiled when we heard that they removed the thorns from the roses in the garden so she would never be pricked. In that moment, we learn something about the fact that Nellie doesn’t understand what consequences are, she never learns that the things we may want can hurt us. And so she keeps going for the exact things she wants, and she has no sense of danger or of the need for pragmatism, or anything beyond the desires and whims of a spoiled child.

It truly says something about the quality of the writing that pretty much my most hated squick came up and all I could do was go, ‘Oh girl what happens next” and just kept clicking. I mean, the game very much tips its hand to it, it is not trying to shock you because that’s not the sort of game it is. It wants you to understand that this is who Nellie is and of course this is how she’s going to act.

But for as monstrous as she is, you feel for her, or I do, when she says, not wrongly, that she was only ever, a “a doll for the family to play with”

The idea of paintings being alive, of being changed as they are painted, that really stuck with me, and I know the painting was the small mystery within the bigger ones contained within the game, I can’t quite get anywhere with it, but I do agree that paintings have a quality of life to them. This is why it could be some future girl, it could be Nellie, it could be another person in another time.

So witches. Let’s talk about this. I know that we have a lot of cross talk about the white haired girl, and if the white haired girl is the witch she takes herself to be or if she’s a hidden princess. And then we have the maid. These two are the unnamed characters within the story thus far, and I know they must be unnamed for a reason, but I didn’t really take the witch thing on its face until the rose turned in her hand.

Oh, Doc, so you think there’s a real witch, and you think it’s the white haired girl? One, yes, I suppose I do and two, no, i suppose I don’t. Remember, the Maid is with her, and I’m also remembering the that the title of this game is The House at Fata Morgana, and I also know, being the one thing I know from the start being about fatas morgana, that they supposedly come from Morgan Le Fay, A WITCH.

So, I’m wondering if the maid isn’t the witch, and if she isn’t creating all of this as an illusion, and IF she is creating all of this as an illusion, how much of it is the facts of that matter? Or the truth? Those are different things, but related. Is it all created of whole cloth?

I mean, i feel like the game of the story has to clearly be about the White Haired girl and the Maid, I can look at a title card--OH SHIT AM I THE WHITE HAIRED GIRL?? (Please don’t tell me but do put a pin in it) that would make sense, we’re both the two unnamed characters, we’re on the title card. Hm.

Is it better to know something, or to be happy? I mean, this is basically the core question and thesis of this segment, and it seems to lean heavily toward no. Everyone was happier not knowing, except, i do want to point out, Nellie. I’m not arguing she’d be happy knowing, she’s not, but I do want to say she would be UNHAPPY in either circumstance.

I don’t agree with the maid that his error was his kindness. His kindness was not his fuckup. It was his desire, and his drive, that came outside of any thought of the family (especially rich considering how he lectures Nellie) to HAVE this girl who captured him in her own flame. She didn’t even mean to, like the candle means no harm to the moth. But kindness, no, kindness was not the issue.

But I do love when she says that we have to follow the paths we’ve begun to trod down. He can’t change any of it, and so he has to go forward.

In all, I liked this section, I have no idea how it will stack up against the others but I can see it laying building blocks for the future of the story.

While being cautious of spoilers, please, if you have any questions, i’ll try to answer!

#Doc plays games #commission review #doc plays the house in fata morgana

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wolfpants · 2 years

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one year in fandom? surely not?

But yes, technically, that's what today is for me! A year since I posted my first fic, a year since coming out of the murky shadows and into somewhere a bit less shadowed (I'm a soft goth, it's a lifestyle)? In that time, I've published 21 fics, and almost half a million words, something I never thought I'd be able to accomplish this time last year when I shyly asked my friend if my writing was decent enough to post online. Those first few months were so tentative, so quiet honestly, and I can't believe where I am today, but the most rewarding thing, besides sharing all of those words, has been meeting all of you talented folk! I wanted to pay tribute to those who have helped lift me up, who have welcomed me into this sprawling corner of the internet with open arms, who have encouraged me to do more, to be more me, to grow as a writer and as a participator in fandom. You have my eternal love and gratitude. My confidence only began as a tiniest seed - you all have helped it grow.

@academicdisasterfic - my best boy n twin flame; your writing is a revelation of authenticity, of heart, of what it is to be human in the real world and a world full of magic. You are a very special person, and I hope you know this.

@wrapped-up - one of my first connections here and my fellow beer lover! Your writing is so effortless, so beautiful, and I feel like I’m hanging with best mates whenever I read your words.

@oknowkiss - are we each other’s evil twin? Maybe. You write the most genius, sexy, witty fics all wrapped up in the most pretty, pretty words, I am in constant awe of you.

@moony-saraneth - the most dedicated cheerleader I know, you mean so much to so many people here, and I’ll never forget how you’ve helped me grow my confidence with your warm and generous encouragement.

@lou-isfake - Licurici is basically my personality these days. What an insanely beautiful fic from start to finish. Your words, like you, are brimming with so much generosity and consideration and kindness.

@nv-md - your talent blows me away every time you post something new, and what’s more, you are full of so much heart and grounded wisdom and do so much good in this fandom. We’re so lucky to have you.

@lqtraintracks- your talent needs no introduction really, your vivid characterisation and scorching smut is legendary. But you also welcome everyone here with such open arms, you give incredible advice and support (all of which has been invaluable to me), and your force in this little corner of the internet is unparalleled. Thank you for being so kind to me.

@coffeedrgn87 - a fellow caffeine fiend and one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met! I love our chats about Dronarry and all of the possibilities and scenarios these three boys can end up in. Thank you for being so lovely.

@the-starryknight - I am so in awe of your masterful prose. You write so stunningly, so thoughtfully, so lovingly. I still pinch myself every time I see a comment from you on ao3. I feel so lucky to have met you here.

@getawayfox - you are such a ray of gorgeous sunshine. Your art is so stunning and I still pinch myself every time I remember that you were inspired to make art from my fic! I’m not worthy.

@krah18 - I have so much enjoyed all of our book chats and reminiscing over early MLM, Blockbuster and old movies! I can’t wait for another year of nostalgia and chatting fic!

@sitp-recs - your rec lists are so thoughtful and so carefully curated. You bring so much community not only to Drarry, but all of the rarepair readers, writers, and fans that you lift up. I am so thankful to you for giving The Hollow a platform and a spot on your blog.

My discord sprinters, banterers, and all round good eggs with talent overflowing from you all in waves - @tackytigerfic you are an absolute legend and your words have literally kept me up to the wee hours; @sweet-s0rr0w my fellow Ron stan and crafter of such evocative fics that stay with me for weeks after reading them; @skeptiquewrites you write romance like no other, my good lord; @sorrybutblog you paint such vivid and gorgeous pictures with your prose, I could live in every world you create; @corvuscrowned, the spooky storyscapes you cook up are absolutely out of this world, and your characterisation is always so insanely good; @m0srael, it’s been an absolute joy being in your orbit, your writing is so incredibly delicate and expressive; @ghaniblue Human made me breathless, absolutely one of the best fics I’ve ever read; @basicallyahedgehog whenever I see you pop up on my feed or in my comments my heart swells with joy, you are the best cheerleader ever; @phoebe-delia what can I say - you are one of the most beautiful souls I’ve ever met, so sweet, so charming, so willing to go full caps on comments, you absolute legend; @phd-mama you are a master of sweet fluff and hot smut; @pineau-noir your characterisation is always so full of heart and authenticity; @maesterchill - what can I say? Your fics haunt me (in the best possible way), your writing is so soulful and romantic; @thebooktopus- your reclists literally got me through the year, so thoughtful and full of dedication - you are so dearly loved here; @makeitp1nk- I adore seeing your cleverly crafted microfics pop up on my feed!; @teacup-tai- a kind soul and a champion of rarepairs and incredible femslash, I’ve loved getting to know you!

To the artists who brighten up my feed, @ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm, @bluebutter-art @short666bread - every time you post something new my heart sings. I am blown over, constantly, by your talents, and the way you can bring to life images only I could have dreamt of before.

I am missing people. I know. But just know that, if we’ve interacted here - squealed over fic, over headcanons, art, or music (!!) - please know that I appreciate you, I cherish you. Thank you for a year of joy.

#fandom stuff #thank you

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stinkybreath · 4 months

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hello

do you trust me to recommend you some books

I read ~170 this year and here’s reviews of my top ten, written for fb and crossposted under the cut in case you’re interested

1: Camp Concentration by Thomas Disch

-I know it’s not obvious from the way I conduct myself here, but I have a very large vocabulary. I was a kid who read the dictionary and also any thesaurus I had access to. So, that said, consider how much it means to me personally that this book taught me 30-50 new words. This isn’t a huge part of the reason I loved this book, but it is a very impressive fact about it that I think will grab the attention of people who might otherwise not read it. This book changed the way I read, the way I think about literature, and the way I evaluate what I have previously read. It’s offensive to me that I lived 30 years as an avid reader and culture sponge without hearing about this book. I cannot recommend it enough. I give it top spot on this list for a very good reason. I’d like to avoid spoiling any of the plot because while I called the twist easily, discovery of each point was so delightful that I want you to have that same experience.

2: Cockatiel x Chameleon by Bavitz

-You all have plenty of experience with me recommending works of fiction published online in formats that deter most readers. This is a normal Najwa activity. I know how it sounds and I know, therefore, that this plea will go more or less unheard, but I BEG you. Look past the fact this was published on AO3. This is one of the most remarkable books I’ve read, period. I mentioned in my worst of how much it bothers me that most writers can’t plausibly write about the internet. This book is the FUCKING ZENITH of writing about being online. It is the absolute peak and I will be shocked if I ever encounter another work that overtakes it. This is a book about people who are so strange they are barely human, but in ways that will be instantly familiar, intimately true, to those of us who grew up on the internet. There is violence and abuse and love and beauty and Chatroulette. There is art and gore and exploration of identity and apocalypse. There is fucking POSTING.

3: Serious Weakness by Porpentine

-Charity Heartscape Porpentine is one of our greatest living authors, opinions of snide Twitter users notwithstanding. I am an evangelist for her Twine game poetry because it is so singular and so affecting. Even a decade on, I can play through Their Angelical Understanding and feel freshly stabbed in the gut. Imagine the thrill I felt when she posted about her completed novel. I would (strongly) recommend this even to people who (somehow) bounced off her games, because her prose style is very distinct from the voice those are in (yet still recognizable). This is an incredibly violent, sick, stomach-turning, difficult, ugly, terrifying book. It’s also ultimately asking the reader a question about love and compassion. If you are sensitive to any trigger in written word about any violent action one person can do to another, skip this book, but if you feel like you have the strength, give her the nine bucks or whatever that she’s asking and devour it like I did. A hook for you: our protagonist has a chance meeting with an embodiment of pain. What follows includes torture, gender, climate disaster, and Columbine. Gorgeous. This book almost convinced me to start doing video essays so I could explain to people the incredible factors at play in it.

4: Negative Space by BR Yeager

-I have been trying to read this book for free for so long that I broke my streak and paid actual money for it. It was one of the better purchases I made all year. Thanks to finally reading some Stephen King this year I now have the requisite foundation to see how heavily his style inspired Yeager in this book, but I would die on the hill defending my position that Yeager does King better than King ever did. There is evil seeping out between the lines of this book. Have you ever had a nightmare that made you feel doomed the entire next day? Have you ever felt you were trapped in your shitty, dying home town? Have you ever been seduced by the excitement of activities that you know might actually kill you? Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and looked at your own dark reflection? Go back to the deepest point of your teenage depression here.

5: We Who Are About to by Joanna Russ

-One of the shortest entries on this list and so one of the easiest sells, but it is just as full of meaning as any other that made the cut. There is so much implied and unsaid about this protagonist. She feels whole, like this is the last chunk of chapters in a series centered on her, but she represents something universal. She is one member of a group from a crash-landed spaceship, a group small enough in numbers that there’s no way for humanity to last on this planet more than one more generation. Any attempts to do even that are so plainly cruel and self-deluding that she wants no part of them, but the others with her don’t see it the same way. Her story is womanhood under patriarchy, it is life and death, it is self-determination. Brutal. I read this at the airport and cried in public.

6: Carrie by Stephen King

-As much as I hate to say it, I gotta hand it to Uncle Steve (or really to Tabitha). This book very nearly justifies the rest of his career on its own. I thought had picked up most of it from cultural osmosis, but there was a truly shocking depth that I couldn’t have found without experiencing it firsthand. Maybe it’s funny to use this word here, but this book is humanist and compassionate and sincere in a way that King never finds again, particularly with the women he writes. Carrie is so vivid that I felt a protective instinct for her throughout the book even though I knew she was about to discover her own power. She reflects parts of me about as well as Lindqvist did in Little Star, which is the work of art that is THE most personal to me. A classic for a fucking reason.

7: The Doloriad by Missouri Williams

-This year, lots of the books that I read had strange echoes of each other. In this, I can pick out shades of Carrie, of Camp Concentration, of We Who Are About To, and even of Serious Weakness. Rarely if ever are these references by each author, but it has enriched my experience by having unofficial interlocking intertexts for all of them. This book has been very divisive with reviewers, and I understand why, because it is cruel and the prose is extremely stylistic. This is somewhat experimental and fully literary and sincerely philosophical. I get it. Not for everyone. But it was for me. A clan of inbreds at the end of the world with their eyes on their scapegoat, nonverbal and disabled Dolores. It shocked me and it challenged me and I loved it.

8: The Ice Cream Man and Other Stories by Sam Pink

-These short stories did the exact opposite of the thing that pissed me off about The Florida Project. These are about people who are varying degrees of sympathetic but the same degree of desperately, penny-scrapingly working poor. The easy pull quote is “unflinching,” because it turns an eye on very ugly parts of real life for so many of us. I think people who grew up middle class will find some voyeuristic, prurient pleasure in these stories, but they’re not written for you. They’re written for us, the people who have lived this way.

I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman 9

-I don’t need to tell you how great this book is, because the whole of booktok has told you this all year. Instead, what I will say is that it is much stranger and less tidy than you’re imagining when you hear the blurb. It’s a short read and it is one of the few times I haven’t regretted following booktok’s advice.

Only Lovers Left Alive by Dave Wallis 10

-This barely squeaked onto this year’s best of, because I started it before 2022 ended and finished it early in the new year. As I read it, especially in the first 20% of the book, I was confused as to how it ended up on my TBR. But toward the end, and throughout the year as I’ve continued to think about it, I understand more instinctively than intellectually that this is a remarkable work. A short synopsis: in the 80s in the UK, there is an epidemic of suicide, but only by adults. The teens left behind forge their own path.

#Porpentine #Bavitz #Thomas Disch #Dave Wallis #Sam pink #Stephen King #jacqueline harpman #Joanna Russ #Missouri Williams #br yeager #b. r. yeager #charity heartscape porpentine

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loquaciousquark · 2 years

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If it's not too much to ask, could you recommend some books to read? I really enjoy your fics, so I figure you're a good person to ask! Happy to try pretty much anything. Any length, genre, reading level - just anything you think is worthwhile! Thank you!

Oh man, that’s so kind! I’m always nervous about recommending things, but if nothing else, here are some of my favorites that have absolutely informed my adult tastes.

1. Riddlemaster of Hed trilogy by Patricia McKillip. High fantasy from the 70s with prophecy, romance, and IMO the most beautiful prose I’ve ever read. I’ve talked about how important this series is to me here and here.

2. The Queen’s Thief series by @meganwhalenturner. Six books, and the last one just came out last year. (Hamlet nibbled on the spine while I was at work one day and I just about died.) Historical low fantasy in a Mediterranean-esque setting where cleverness always (usually) wins and the gods are very, very, very real. This was the first book I read where the hero gets genuinely, irreversibly hurt, and watching him love the woman who hurt him and watching her heal after the horror has shaped all of my writing ever since.

3. Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen. My parents gave me a set of this, Sherlock Holmes, and The Odyssey for Christmas when I was about 12, and realizing that people have always been funny and smart and hurtful and proud blew my mind.

4. Gaudy Night by Dorothy Sayers. Tenth in a series of 30s-set detective novels starring Lord Peter Wimsey and his client-turned-love (and eventually -lover) Harriet Vane. Not all of the Wimsey novels feature Harriet, but the five or six that do are some of my favorite writing ever. I stole my use of epigraphs almost entirely from these novels, and there is a great pleasure in reading fiction when you’ve realized the author is so much smarter and well-read than you, and rather than becoming jealous you just lean back sponge-like to soak it in.

5. The Hercule Poirot novels by Agatha Christie. I’ve always loved period detective fiction, and the moustached Belgian is my favorite. I love the setups; I love the general constructions of the plot; I love the glimpses into certain romances (and doomed romances) seen only through Hercule’s & Hastings’s eyes. I love how you can see the early influences of other detective pieces in the early works develop into new and exciting original takes. The Murder of Roger Akroyd is widely considered to be one of the best detective novels ever written, and I vividly remember having my mind blown by some of the revelations.

6. The Grim & Blackthorn trilogy by Juliet Marillier. Irish-inspired historical fantasy, this trilogy came with me on my recent trip to Chicago, and as @silksieve, @eponymous-rose, and @fistfulofgammarays can attest, it was a high struggle for me not to gorge myself on them back to back. I finished the first book just as my plane landed in Chicago, and the wholly involuntary gasp I gave at a certain revelation made my seatmate laugh, which of course meant I had to sit there and explain to her why the sentence I’d just read changed EVERYTHING. @jadesabre301 recommended these to me because she thought I’d love them, and she was right. Tons of hurt/comfort; it could even be argued that all three books are a slow comfort after the horrifying hurt of the first two chapters of the first book.

Hopefully this at least gives you a starting point! I’m not reading as much as I’d like to these days, but these are perennial favorites.

#pride and prejudice #juliet marillier #quark recs #anonymous #riddlemaster of hed #dorothy sayers #hercule poirot

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a-wondering-thought · 5 months

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HI 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

(i pull this shit with anyone i follow who has anything remotely in common with me. the moots who know, know 😔😔 sorry)

tis i cristie your new crazy follower!! we have a mighty lot in common 👀👀 okok to the actual asks:

1. favourite YA book and favourite classic book? (i like separating these because one is usually for fandomy entertainment and one is for laughing at gay idiots (affectionate) marvelling over the mind of the author and the beauty of the prose) (also the picture of dorian gray is looking at you with giant puppy eyes rn PICK IT)

2. favourite osemanverse, riordanverse and grishaverse character? (wow universes galore) (also i’ve only read heartstopper so i am not acquainted with the rest of the osemanverse books)

3. have you by any chance read good omens. or watched the tv adaptation which is most possibly one of the only good tv adaptations i have watched in this lifetime. (idk why i always start with read when the show is more popular) you probably haven’t. idk why i asked this. but you should read it. or watch it. or both. yes 👁️👄👁️

4. finally, pick: devotion or rivalry

—

i do realise that when people receive these asks they regard this with a mixture of mild terror and awkwardness so i apologise for that 😀

hiiiii new mutual!!! im vi and i too am crazy so im glad to have another crazy mutual :D

favourite YA book is hard ngl, i think not including soc any osemanverse and pjo/hoo books my favourite ya book is Girl, Goddess, Queen by Bea Fitzgerald. its a Hades and Persephone retelling(i love greek mythology) and Persephone is so badass in it' and i think my favourite classical book is A Little Princess because of reading it when i was younger but im not sure if its classed as a classic? if its not then maybe sense and sensibility? it was the first Jane Austin book i read and im very sorry to disappoint the puppy eyes but i haven't actually read the picture of dorian gray yet which i know is scandalous and i do have a copy but i just haven't gotten round to reading it yet but *aristocrat voice* i might have to start now so that i might please the puppy eyes *swoops off hat and bows*

ahhh you should defiantly read their other books they are amazing! but my favourite osemanverse character is Tori Spring (aka the whole reason i started my blog) my favourite Riordanverse character is Nico Di Angelo(but i do love Blitzen from mc too) and my favourite grishaverse characters are Inej Ghafa and Wylan Hendriks(van eck) (also yes two pls dont make me decide) (and yessss universe galore i love it sm)

im very sorry but no i have not as i have a habit of starting a ton of shows and then taking months to finish them(i currently have seven main ones but three not so main ones and i longgg list of to watches) i do have a lot of mutuals that love the show tho so its on my shows i want to watch list and i have been meaning to watch it so i might soon(im considering just trying to binge it) and idk if my local library has the book but i have seen some of Neil gaimen so if they do i might read it

hmmm im not sure what context you mean(you probably did that on purpose im just stupid) but overall i think devotion bc rivalry can cause conflict which im afraid of :D

___

and dont apologize this was so fun!!! one of the best asks i've ever gotten for sure!! thank you sm for sending me it! and i wanted to ask if we could be friends? and could message you? (dont worry if not) (its just you seem really cool and amazing!!)

#answered #vi screams into the void

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phireads · 3 months

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My Books of 2023 Ranking 📖

This is a little late (it's the 12th of January when I'm writing this) but I read 18 books this year and I really wanted to just summarise my thoughts on them.

Obvious disclaimer: these are just my opinions and I would love to have a conversation about any of these books, whether you agree with me or not (the beauty of literature is that it's subjective) so please ask me any questions you might have.

Okay, let's get into it!

Re-reads:

The Smell of Other People’s Houses by Bonnie-Sue Hitchcock

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Simply incredible. This was my fourth time reading this book. It does have a great deal of nostalgic merit for me so that surely makes me biassed and therefore I can’t say it’s definitively the best book ever (however much I might want to). It’s not some sort of philosophical masterpiece, nor does it present any new views on society or culture. But it does exactly what it sets out to do. It is a book written for teenagers and young people which teaches them, through vibrant characters and rich prose, that they are deserving of love and that a true sense of belonging can always be found if sought. I will be rereading this spring.

First Reads:

16. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

⭐️⭐️

Ugh. This was such a slog. I had only ever read one Dickens work before this - A Christmas Carol, as required by my English GCSE (standard examinations in England, taken at age 15/16) - and I really enjoyed it. Yes, ACC was a novella and therefore, much shorter than Great Expectations and, I believe, most of Dickens’ other novels but I think it also has a spirit to it which just isn’t present in this book. I’m not referring to the “Christmas spirit” or indeed any of the four supernatural spirits which visit Ebenezer Scrooge throughout the stanzas, but rather the sense of movement that tells the reader that a story is progressing and wills them to read on. Great Expectations, to me, felt uninspired and dull. I liked (as in enjoyed reading about them, not solely agreed with them morally) only two characters, Biddy and Joe. The rest of the characters simply didn’t interest me, as they were too trivialised (which seems to be a major component of Dickens’ writing and all I can say is: Bertolt Brecht does it better). I recognise and appreciate what Dickens was trying to do with Miss Havisham having created a monster out of Estella but the way it was conveyed, especially given Pip was telling the story, simply lessened the impact. I didn’t like the convoluted prose, nor did I find the plot particularly engaging. I will be trying another Dickens novel (I own a copy of A Tale of Two Cities but if anyone has a better recommendation, please let me know) but needless to say, my expectations won’t be all that Great.

15. The Tomb in Seville: Crossing Spain on the Brink of Civil War by Norman Lewis

⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was a travel piece which focuses on Lewis’ journey, with his brother-in-law, across Spain on an errand for his father-in-law, Eugene Corvaja to locate the Corvaja family’s ancestral tomb in (you guessed it) Sevilla. There were several elements of this book which I did enjoy, particularly Lewis’ way of imparting obscure facts (I had no clue there had been witch trials on the Iberian peninsula). Sadly, a lot of the anecdotal stories felt quite distant and unemotional. Perhaps, because I mostly read fiction, I was wrong to expect such sentiment from a travel piece but I do think there should have been more urgency felt when recounting being in the crossfire of a battle. I do want to acknowledge this book’s value as it demonstrates the rest of the world’s view of the guerra civil.

14. North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell

⭐️⭐️⭐️

This one was honestly quite a disappointment for me. I know that seems ridiculous to say, given how I’ve rated it three stars, but I was just so excited to read this. I’d heard that Gaskell was an adept writer who did not shy away from political commentary. That much is true. I was extremely impressed by Margaret and Mr Thornton’s political sparring, as most Regency and Victorian era works that I’ve encountered disguise their political and social messaging so as to not create too much controversy. Gaskell, on the other hand, makes no attempt to veil the more sensitive issues of her time. What did disappoint me was her characterisation, or lack thereof. I did not find myself drawn to Margaret Hale, John Thornton, or any of their comrades and rivals. I’m very much a character-driven reader. To properly enjoy a fiction book, its characters must be at least one of three things:

Relatable - a character acts or thinks like me and therefore, I feel a bond with them and am invested in their fate (see: C. Brontë’s Jane Eyre or Austen’s Elinor Dashwood)

Recognisable - a character acts or thinks like someone I have encountered and therefore, feels realistic to me (see: Alcott’s Amy March or Stoker’s Lucy Westenra)

Compelling - a character acts or thinks in a manner with which I am not at all familiar and may find morally reprehensible but does so in a way which engages me and encourages me to read on (see: E. Brontë’s Hindley Earnshaw or Golding’s Jack Merridew)

That seems arbitrary to state but regardless, I must be engaged with the characters for a plot or the writing to be worth reading and unfortunately I was not engaged with the characters of North and South. I will still be picking up Gaskell’s other work though and I can see why she is an exalted author and want to give her another chance.

13. You’ll be the Death of Me by Karen M. McManus

⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is not the kind of book I usually talk about on here, probably because I rarely read any young adult literature anymore (not for any snobbish reason, my tastes have just changed) and have never been a great fan of mysteries. However, I have an odd devotion to Karen M. McManus books, having fond memories of going to the supermarket after school to pick up her latest novel and trying not to bump into a tree as I read it on the walk home. So of course, I had to read this. It’s simply okay. The crime was basic and its perpetrator was unconvincing but it was an easy and fun read and I like to rate books based on my personal experience, rather than the general academic consensus. Would recommend The Cousins over this but still a good time.

12. The Return by Victoria Hislop

⭐️⭐️⭐️

I had read one Victoria Hislop book before The Return - Those who are Loved, published eleven years after this - and I’m very happy to say that Hislop is not a one hit wonder whose inspiration dims over time. I can see in The Return the ideas that would become her later novels. So naturally, this book was not as emotive or as fleshed out as I would have liked but it’s really nice to see a popular author who is very clearly dedicated to their craft and has improved. I really need to read The Island. Also brownie points for the Lorca mentions!

11. Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen

⭐️⭐️⭐️

I’m actually sort of nervous to post this on here - particularly because I have beloved mutuals who would sail a thousand ships for this book. I’d heard about all the satire and social commentary in Northanger Abbey so I decided to approach it with a more academic viewpoint (especially since I love gothic literature - yes, even the silly and melodramatic stuff which Jane Austen criticises - so I didn’t want to get personally offended). I really respect what Austen set out to do and this is certainly the most transparent social commentary I’ve read from her. I just didn’t connect with the characters. I understand that Catherine is meant to be almost a parody of herself but she didn’t feel as real to me as Austen’s other heroines. Nor did, I truly regret to say, Henry feel like a leading man. I wasn’t very invested in their relationship and felt that their obstacles were resolved too quickly. HOWEVER, biggest compliments to the author for creating John Thorpe, one of the most timeless and insufferable antagonists of all time. I adored the fact that he’s not comically evil, he’s just awful. Where Catherine hopes she might be a heroine, John Thorpe believes down to his breeches that he is a hero. I also thought it was so well done how he tried so hard to get Catherine to fall for him and ended up directly facilitating her relationship with Henry. All in all, I will definitely be rereading because I’m sure I’ve missed some nuance. Unfortunately, Ms Austen has set my expectations so high, I can’t help but feel a little disappointed.

10. Ariadne by Jennifer Saint

⭐️⭐️⭐️

This wasn’t really anything new but Jennifer Saint writes beautifully so I would like to read Elektra and Atalanta.

To me, this novel felt like a story of sisterhood so I’m surprised it wasn’t called Ariadne and Phaedra. Due to it just being called Ariadne, I would always have had a sense of Phaedra’s tragic fate, even had I not known her mythology beforehand. I will say, I read this in Crete after having visited the real Knossos so that definitely helped my enjoyment of the book. I would absolutely recommend this to people wanting to get into mythological retellings but be warned - the feminism is really basic and bland.

9. Tortilla Flat by John Steinbeck

⭐️⭐️⭐️

All men these days know how to do is get arrested, fall asleep, drink wine and steal vacuum cleaners. This is, again, a brilliant instance of a writer developing over years of honing their skills. In Tortilla Flat, we see Steinbeck’s trademark landscape of the hot California deserts combined with the first inklings of his masterful character work. Danny and his friends are instant favourites of mine - especially the Pirate and Jesús María Corcoran. The plot is pretty weak, especially for Steinbeck, but as I said, this is one of his earlier works. Still a very engaging and atmospheric read and made me wish for five friends to share a gallon (or two) of wine with.

8. The Wedding by Dorothy West

⭐️⭐️⭐️

I would 100% recommend this book to anybody who enjoys media concerning high society and decadence. The Wedding marries themes of familial and racial politics with an idyllic island setting. I found the conversations between Gram, Liz and Shelby to be extremely compelling. I wasn’t as interested in the parallel plotline of Lute and his daughters though so the ending fell a bit flat for me. I also wish that we had seen Shelby’s fiance, Meade. I think West intended for Meade to be a symbol of Shelby’s choice between her family/ race and her love and therefore did not need to be developed into a full character but I just felt that if we had got to know Meade, we would have better understood Shelby’s decisions. Also, this is the second book I’ve read recently where a man dies directly after intercourse - is this a common plot point in books???

7. Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Here we are. The behemoth. It’s not actually extremely long but oh boy, is it jam-packed? I really didn’t know how to rate this because it’s just so different from anything I’ve ever read before. I suppose I should get the negatives out of the way first by saying that I did not enjoy the structuring. I wish we didn’t know that the majority of the characters of the first half of the novel are already dead when Nelly recounts the story to Mr Lockwood. I understand that Brontë might have intended to show how all the first generation were doomed from the beginning and I think telling us of Catherine’s death was ingenious but I wish I’d found out about Isabella’s death in the main narrative. Otherwise, what a masterpiece! The pacing was a little slow for the first 100 or so pages but I honestly enjoyed that because it allowed me to really immerse myself in Brontë’s eerie moors. As someone who spent a lot of time in Yorkshire as a child, I found the descriptions to be absolutely transporting. I thought the first half of the book was brilliant but the second half - concerning Catherine, Heathcliff and Hindley’s children - is what makes this book a deserving classic. I have a lot more to say but I promised myself I’d keep these reviews short and digestible so I’ll move on.

6. Anxious People by Fredrik Backman

⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was my fourth Fredrik Backman book (following A Man Called Ove, Beartown and Us Against You). I think if it hadn’t been a Backman novel, I would have loved it even more but you know how it is, I have high expectations. The writing was, as ever, extremely charming and engaging (shoutout to the most consistently brilliant translator I’ve ever read, Neil Smith) and the characters were so realistic and loveable. I just felt the plot dragged. Probably because the majority of the novel takes place in one apartment building and the same story is told from multiple perspectives. I felt a lot of joy whilst reading this but it’s definitely my least favourite Fredrik Backman book. Oh well, onto The Winners (which I know is going to make me cry)!

5. Before the Coffee Gets Cold: Tales from the Café by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was so beautiful. I feel I should start by noting that this book was bought for me by my beloved best friend and neither of us realised it was a sequel until I was halfway through reading it so naturally there were elements of the plot and characters that I did not fully understand but I have tried to not let that affect my judgement. The premise of the book is such an interesting one and, as a complete newbie to Japanese literature and a relative novice when it comes to understanding Japanese culture, I didn’t feel too overwhelmed by the different details. My favourite story was that of Yukio, Kyoko and their mother, Kinuyo. Since we’d already met Kyoko in Gohtaro’s story (and likely in the first book - take what I say with a pinch of salt), I had a fondness for the family by the time Yukio came to the café. I cried on the train because that was the best way that story could have concluded, in my opinion. The other stories were very powerful but it was Yukio’s that shone the brightest. I also LOVED the character of Kazu. I will definitely be reading the first (oops), third and fourth books in this series.

4. The Children of Jocasta by Natalie Haynes

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

My second Greek mythological retelling of the year, The Children of Jocasta was actually quite a shock for me. I’m a huge fan of Sophocles’ Antigone (though I’ve never seen or read Oedipus at Colonus or Oedipus Rex) so I’m very picky when it comes to reimaginings. I found the semi-modernisation aspect to be pretty cringeworthy (not everyone needs a nickname) but I found Haynes’ writing to be so addictive that I could move past those aspects. I was so intrigued by the dynamics between Oedipus and Jocasta and the plague element gave the story a lot more historical grounding (given the Athenian plagues of that era). Such an enjoyable and compelling read. I don’t know if it’s necessarily a good introductory read for those unfamiliar with mythology. If you’re looking for a truly modern Antigone retelling, absolutely give Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie a go.

3. Tess of the D’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was the surprise of the year for me to be honest. A book written in the late nineteenth century by a man about a young maiden and her downfall? Sounds like the most maddening experience. But it wasn’t. Hardy’s portrayal of Tess, and of the women and girls she represents, was incredibly sympathetic. His writing was also remarkably atmospheric - especially during the final scenes at Stonehenge. Even the conversations with Tess and her friends felt like real teenage exchanges. Take notes, Stephen King and F. Scott Fitzgerald - men can write women convincingly and respectfully. Angel Clare also felt like someone I’ve met a million times over, someone who isn’t the epitome of evil but perpetuates so many injustices. Honestly a spectacular read. I’m so excited to pick up Far from the Madding Crowd.

2. Passing by Nella Larsen

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

It feels almost strange putting Passing in second place, considering the profound effect it had on me. This book is completely incredible. Larsen’s prose is atmospheric and oddly breezy. It makes the plot feel deceptively light until we, as the reader, understand the stakes. From the second page, on which Clare is referred to as a “pale small girl” (the subversive ordering of adjectives bypassing English grammatical rules and thereby putting the utmost importance on the hue of Clare’s skin), the author puts so much consideration into her choice of wording which really makes this work stand out to me.Clare and Irene are truly two sides of the same coin (forgive the cliché). Their equal opportunities are made all the more clear by the wholly opposite way the two women deal with them. Clare chooses to hide from the truth (that her husband is a racist, that her marriage is founded on lies) whilst Irene cannot bear to live in ignorance when she recognises the connection between her own husband, Brian, and Clare. The two women are shining examples of what literary characters should be. They are complex and flawed and both seem to envy each other. Clare covets Irene’s life and Irene resents Clare for having the power to take that from her. Whilst reading, I considered many possible ways that the story might end but never that. Incredible. I just wish the penultimate scene had been a tad longer but that’s my own critique (barely even that, just personal preference). Also the film is spectacular and a rare faithful adaptation of its source material.

1. Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️Finally! We’re here! Ugh I love love love this book. Is it as socially or academically impactful as Passing? No, not at all. But it’s just a brilliant book. Anne is fiercely intelligent and kind and just an all-round wonderfully written protagonist. I loved Marilla, Matthew, Gilbert and Diana too. The scenes with all Anne’s classmates are just a perfect reflection of being a tween/ teen girl and feeling the joy of being surrounded by friends and being totally carefree. I feel like I knew Anne and all of her friends - I laughed with them and cried with them and watched them grow up and it was truly a magical experience. I want to visit St Edward’s Island because Montgomery paints it in such an enchanting way. I’m so invested in Anne and Gilbert’s relationship, it’s embarrassing. This book also found me at the perfect time - right as I was starting a distance degree. So I felt comfort in studying alone whilst also pursuing a career knowing Anne was too (I recognise that’s a little silly but oh well, it works for me). I wish I could start Anne of Avonlea right away but I know that I want to buy physical copies because I can tell I’m going to read these books again and again. Pure comfort. Pure timelessness.

📖

Alright, that's everything! Onto a wonderful new year of reading in 2024 <3

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mapsofnonexistentplaces · 4 months

Text

ok trying to go over the year’s reads in chronological order i am just spitballing and none of this is good reviewwork

house of leaves — it’s house of leaves what do you want me to say. there was a house of leaves. genuinely really love it but i’ve started to form this semihearted grudge against it because it’s like The One Weird Book everyone recommends and it kind of clouds discussion of other ergodic lit LOL it’s for good reason though there’s nothing else quite like it

kafka on the shore — book that i need to finish actually i’ve still got a chunk of it undone…. honestly might just restart it altogether i don’t remember much of the plot since i started it in like february. but augh. i remember it feeling very smooth to read. pacing of it was extremely stilted in a way that like. i thought was quite cool actually. loved the way it split its perspectives

ulysses — read through a few chapters before i kind of just dropped it unintentionally. really want to get back to it it’s just. impenetrable if i’m not giving it my full and utmost attention lol

a streetcar named desire — reiterating something i said ages ago which is “i could not fucking care less about what tennessee williams’ plays are about but goddamn if they’re not extremely inspiring in the way they’re composed and conveyed” or something like that

the like first 2 books of the new wc arc go inbetween here chronologically…. they’re not as fun as the last arc enough so that i’ve decided i don’t care about those cats anymore lol. complete slog that makes me wish for the days of cat hell possession conflicts instead of weird love triangles or whatever

wonderbook — really good…. i mean it’s literally a “guide” but it feels much more like just a ‘manifesto’ of how a story can be good. it was a really fun read as someone who’s never really been too impressed by common writing advice and who has also never really gotten engrossed in writing circles with other people…. kind of book that feels valuable to both people who are freshly getting into writing and more experienced writers. definitely helped me name and put pressure on elements of my own writing and composition that was just fully instinct-driven prior. it’s good.

tainaron — aughhhh i’ve reread this one like thrice this year…. i’ve fucking yelled about it before on my blog so many times and i’m just restating what i’ve said before which is go look up tainaron and read it it’s like 70 pages it’s just posted online by the original author and it’s a wonderful time. bugs can be both scary and beautiful. you will realise this. ❤️

sphinx or robot — from the same author! this one’s also fun but just not as satisfactory or unified as tainaron imo. nother good short bout though

a midsummer night’s dream — i don’t like shakespeate. dint care.

if on a winter’s night a traveller — hol-like in that it kind of clouds discussion of ergodic lit but once again i kind of get it. honestly this feels like a really good digestible intro to such styles id definitely recommend it with the caveat of like. “be ready for useless background misogyny throughout”. the whole premise grants it a really slick pace love the idea of uniting unfinished ‘chapters’ of stories together…. will forever be thinking about leaning from the steep slope and wishing it was a fully fledged novel though

the castle of crossed destinies — another calvino work. once again love this guy’s prose although i wish he wrote women better LOL uhhh honestly just a really good bite sized bit of weird allegorical literature it’s so much more obtuse and “dry” than ioawnat but i feel like the framing device and style make up for the kind of nothing plot. i suppose that’s kind of the point of it as well….

strassburg’s tristan — currently reading through it and halfway across! specifically the hatto translation which i’m like most definitively marking as some of the most beautiful prose i’ve ever read LOL style of it feels like wading through water

shit that’s on my reading list and that i want to go through soon also….

already started vandermeer’s ambergris trilogy i think i just started and forgot to ever finish city of saints and madmen. fun style though

the complete cosmicomics — again sifted through a bit of the beginning it feels like an even more sludgy set of calvino works than castle of crossed destinies was. but it’s enchanting regardless and i’ll probably read it and like it. i’m lame!

this is how you lose the time war — been on my list for ages i’ve seen excerpts i’ve liked….

piranesi — when rocks have a shape they can be anything in the world or whatever i’m sure this book will say it in a cool way

the seagull — i’m really struggling to find interesting plays that are not about divorce or uninteresting melodrama and this one still applies im sure but from what i’ve read it does so in an interesting way LOL

pale fire — to complete the set of “weird books nobody will shut up about being weird” i need to get to this one. 👍

#.mid #ok that took a while. goddamn

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death-and-other-myths · 1 year

Text

The Song of Achilles

By Madeline Miller

I'm an uncultured swine and have never read Homer's Iliad. But I have read The Song of Achilles, and wrote an unhinged review/recap as I completed chapters!

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

So I’ve been hearing about this book for a while. All I know about it is that it’s Greek? (Roman?? God I wish I paid more attention in school) and is a romance story of homosexual nature. And everyone says it’s really powerful and is going to make me cry.

I’m like six chapters in and I can already tell I’m going to cry at some point. Not just because of the story, but because of the incredible amount of care in the writing. These prose are BEAUTIFUL. Not one word is wasted and Madeline Miller is just exceptionally talented with describing heady emotional things. I’m wowed.

So this story is told from the perspective of Patroclus. He is a prince! And his father is an abusive piece of shit. Just an awful, boorish human.

One year, their kingdom gets to host “the games” (I’m assuming like… the Olympic Games) and Patroclus is too weak to compete in the kids competitions, but he watches some kid from the neighboring kingdom just decimate the competition. He’s fast and blonde and a wonder kid. So it’s awesome that his father quite literally tells Patroclus “That’s what a son should be.”

See? This guy is such a dick!

Patroclus’ mother is mentally handicapped. It’s mentioned she has a scar on her temple from where her father once hit her. So that’s awful.

Oh, also Greek gods and goddesses are a thing in this world! Like a legitimate thing and not just legends or part of a religion or something. They come down and hang out with the mortals all the time like it’s totally fucking normal. I love it.

When Patroclus is nine, his father drags him to compete for some random princess’ hand in marriage, and poor Patroclus is the only suitor that’s younger than twenty. Like… what was the thinking here, Dad? What the fuck? The princess, Helen, is rumored to be crazy beautiful (she’s wearing a veil) and these guys are falling all over her. Her father makes the suitors swear to protect her always, and even little Patroclus takes the oath because everyone else is. Helen is asked to choose a man, and of course doesn’t choose the nine year old. And this all just reinforces to Patroclus that he is small and weak and not enough for his father.

So ten year old Patroclus is standing in a field one day when some fat, noble asshat kid comes and bullies him. Like… even though he’s a prince, the noble kids still pick on him. And his Dad doesn’t give a shit. They get into an argument over some dice and the fat kid stumbles and promptly EXPLODES HIS HEAD ON A ROCK. Patroclus is just like… horrified. The noble family demands punishment and Pat’s Dad is like “Whatever I’ll just banish him. I never liked this kid anyway.” — So Patroclus is sent to a neighboring kingdom and stripped of his title.

Well thank god this neighboring kingdom’s King is actually a good guy. He takes in lots of orphans and banished kids apparently. Patroclus sleeps in a big bunk with a bunch of other kids and totally blows his shot at being social and making friends when one of the boys asks if he wants to play dice. Pat is like “DICE?!?! FUCK YOU NO!” Because he’s still traumatized from accidentally killing someone over dice. From then on, he spends his days eating alone in the corner.

The prince, who happens to be that beautiful blonde kid he saw win the race, comes and eats with the boys and is the friendliest and most charismatic ten year old ever. As the story goes, he’s half god. His father once tackled a sea goddess, raped her, then forced her to stay on land and give birth to his half god kid after a year. When her year was up, she left immediately. I mean WOW. Ancient Greece was pretty brutal I guess, so I shouldn’t be surprised? And Greek mythology is also riddled with stories of rape and non-consensual shenanigans. But YIKES.

Well anyway, this kid’s name is Archilles and he’s good at everything, but totally humble and kind. Which really gets on Patroclus’ nerves. So he’s hiding out in the storage closet one day because he’s just so fucking done with everything, and Achilles finds him. He says the drill master (fighting instructor guy) is looking for him and he’ll be punished if he doesn’t have a good reason for missing spear class.

Patroclus, who is so traumatized from accidentally murdering someone and being banished by his father that he has nothing to lose, is like “Well, just tell them I was with you all morning. That way they can’t be mad.” And Achilles is like “Cool. I don’t lie, though.” So Pat says “Then how about I come with you to your music lessons?” — and he does!!

(By the way, I am doing this book such a disservice in the way I describe dialogue. Please know that literally every word, including the way these boys speak, is absolute poetry. I’m translating as best as my stupid sausage fingers can.)

So Patroclus goes to lyre lessons and is captivated by Achilles’ music skills. It reminds him of how his mother loved music. And Achilles must have been touched by the reverence with which Pat watches him, because when he goes before his father, he totally spins the story that he asked Patroclus to skip drills to come with him. His king Dad isn’t even mad. In fact, he says “I’ve been asking you if you want to take any of the boys as friends for years, and you refused. Why this one? He’s small and weird and I heard he killed a guy.” — And Achilles says “He surprises me.” And nothing more.

From then on, Achilles and Patroclus do everything together. Patroclus even moves into his bedroom and sleeps there in his own bed. They get into a little fight one day when Pat comes to watch Achilles do his drills (because he never trains in front of the other boys… because there’s a prophecy that he will be the greatest warrior of their generation and his god mother said she doesn’t want anyone knowing how amazing he is yet). Well even at 10 years old, Achilles is an amazing fighter. And Patroclus, being a dumb kid, is like “FIGHT ME OH MY GOD I’M SO IMPRESSED BUT ALSO HATE YOU AND I’M ALSO YOUR BIGGEST FAN BUT LET’S FIGHT.” And Achilles is like “Nope. Don’t ask me again.”

For the rest of the year they are best buds. I guess Patroclus had to get that last bit of jealousy out of his system. He is insanely happy being Achilles’ best friend. He doesn’t have nightmares about heads exploding anymore. They do everything together. Even the king invites him to anything Achilles is a part of.

Every so often, Achilles goes to visit with his Mom at the beach. One morning, he comes back and says his Mom wants to meet Patroclus. — This is adorable because it means Achilles has been telling her about his bestie. But also kind of terrifying because she’s a god that was raped and hates mortals. So Pat goes down to the beach and this mermaid goddess selkie lady comes and talks to him. She sounds terrifying. Black eyed and sharp mouthed. She basically says to him “You know he’s going to be a god, right?” — Pat is like “Um, yes.” — and she’s like “Good. You’ll die soon enough.” Like damn she really does hate mortals. (With good reason lol)

But I feel sorry for Patroclus. That’s still not a nice thing to hear. Achilles finds him hiding in an olive grove and they have a sweet talk about it. Achilles isn’t even sure how he’d become a god (his mother thinks if he becomes famous enough, the gods will favor him and bring him into the gang. It’s happened with half-god heroes before). He’s more interested in being a hero and doesn’t think being immortal sounds fun. Patroclus is relieved by this and they run off to do 12 year old things.

In the next chapter, they’re 13 and so are all the foster boys, so basically this palace is full of puberty right now. Sleeping with the servant girls is very commonplace, but Achilles never wants to (despite his father encouraging him) and Patroclus is too awkward to speak to anyone except for Achilles. But Pat is ALSO THIRTEEN and starting to have sexy dreams himself, just not about servant girls. Patroclus and Achilles are sitting on the beach one day when Patroclus fucking goes for it. He kisses his best friend, and it’s super nice, but Achilles’ reaction is to RUN AWAY. So Pat is immediately like “Wow I fucked up.”

Things only get worse when Achilles’ angry god Mom appears and chokes him out like “You fucked up.” — she’s so pissed at him for doing this, she demands Achilles be sent away from hero training somewhere far off where some mortal kid can’t derail her plans. Things are so awkward between the boys that Patroclus doesn’t even say goodbye when he leaves in the morning. He pretends to be asleep while Achilles looks torn about it. And then his friend is gone.

Poor baby is all sad the next day. So sad, in fact, he wanders out to the woods and has a moment of clarity (or stupidity?) and is like… well I’m no where near the ocean, so I guess it would be safe. And he runs after Achilles (who has a good 6 hour head start on him). Patroclus runs for hours and finally stops to catch his breath, and hears a noise that he thinks is bandits. He’s tackled… but it’s Achilles! — Who had a feeling he could come and fucking WAITED for him. YAY!!

I so expected the next chapter to be “5 years later…” or something. And Achilles comes back after training. But yay! I like this better. The friends get to stay together and everybody is cool about the whole “kissing on the beach” thing and it’s never brought up. Patroclus even has this cute moment when he’s running where he thinks “If I ever see him again, I will do everything in my power to be cool and not piss off his god mom.”

So then Achilles’ teacher shows up because it’s late and he hasn’t arrived at the mountain yet. And to their surprise, he is a CENTAUR!! Like an older, badass centaur named Chiron who has been around longer than most gods. So even though they’re gods and crazy and what they say goes, he has some sway there. I love… that the kids are freaked out by the centaur lol. They’re like CREEPED OUT. And it’s made even worse when they have to ride on his back because it’s getting dark and they need to get up the mountain. This is such 13 year old behavior. They’re being respectful, but Patroclus narrating is like “eeeuuughhh.”

Turns out Chiron is totally cool and teaches them whatever they want to know. It’s not all about fighting (I’m picturing Phil from Disney’s Hercules lol). He teaches them stuff about the forest and healing and surgery and how to cook. And eventually he teaches them how to fight. And when Achilles asks “How am I?”

He’s like… “Umm that prophecy is totally true and you are going to fuck so many people up when you’re grown up. I literally have nothing to teach you. You’re already a god ordained warrior and you’re only going to get stronger.”

Achilles: “Cool! I don’t want to fight in wars yet, though.”

Patroclus: “How about me?”

Chiron: “Nah, you’re pretty bad at this. But did you ever want to be good?”

He’s like… nah, not really. So Chiron is like “Cool! Ima show you kids how to weave baskets!”

One day Achilles’ mom shows up and she is piiiiiiissed. She probably would have killed Patroclus had Chiron not showed up and talked her down from her murder ledge. Whatever he and Achilles say to her makes her agree not to murder Patroclus, so there we go. The years peel by with idyllic days. The way this is written is so beautiful. My fumbling descriptions really don’t do it justice. This book is just tender. It’s so pure and sweet.

So the boys are 16, and even though Patroclus has been pining after Achilles after all these years, he’s been doing such a good job of not being obvious about it. He might get caught staring every now and then, but is otherwise incredibly fearful of 1. Ruining his friendship with Achilles and 2. Being castrated by his angry fish god mom.

There’s a cute part where Patroclus gives him a carved wooden statue for his birthday that is him with a lyre.

Okay so one day, after the boys have a conversation about how much older they both look (there are no mirrors on the mountain lol) — Achilles comes back from a visit with his Mom and says he asked her what she thinks of where they live on the mountain (in this beautiful rose quartz cave with stars painted on the ceiling and just beautiful scenery all around). And she begrudgingly admits that she can’t see them on the mountain. (It’s not explained why, but let’s all take this blessing and not complain)

So with this new found bit of intel, Achilles is like YEP. Ima kiss the heck out of you now. And they have a really sexy but also sweet scene in chapter 10. I appreciate that everything is both sensually and tastefully described. I think it’s pretty obvious that Achilles has liked him all this time too, but was also afraid of his angry god mom killing his friend. They pal around basically being boyfriends for a few weeks and are wondering if they should tell Chiron about their relationship when a messenger from Achilles’ father shows up. He says he needs to return home at once for business.

So dang it. The boys are not happy about this. They would much rather just stay on the mountain and kiss in the crystal cave forever.

They arrive back at the palace and fucking Thetis (angry fish god mom) is on the front steps. Apparently, Helen, the princess Patroclus met when he was 9 years old, has been kidnapped. Some prince from Troy came over and took her, so now everyone is rallying to help.

This line is both horrible and hilarious to me:

Only an easterner would do this. Everyone knew how they dripped with perfume, were corrupt from soft living. A real hero would have taken her outright, with the strength of his sword.

Like it’s okay to kidnap the lady, but do it with honor lol.

Peleus (Achilles’ Dad) announces that not only will he send any man that wishes to go (everyone is like.. clamoring to sign up)… but he informs the crowd that Helen’s Dad had a bunch of heroes promise to protect Helen seven years ago, and Patroclus immediately SHITS HIMSELF. He’s like OH FUCK THAT WAS REAL? I THOUGHT IT WAS A DREAM! Peleus pulls Achilles and Pat aside after dinner and says he thinks this would be a great opportunity for Achilles to lead an army and take down Troy, but Achilles says he’s not into the idea. He says he knows about the oath Patroclus swore, but the boys try to argue that it doesn’t count because his father disowned him. Peleus is surprisingly cool about this and says “Let’s just see how things pan out.”

So the next morning, Patroclus wakes up and Achilles isn’t there. He’s not worried at first. But as the morning goes on, and he looks literally everywhere, even the beach where he goes to visit his scary Mom, Achilles is literally nowhere to be found. He gets it out of Peleus’ advisor that Achilles is with his mother and he doesn’t know when he’ll be back. So Patroclus is bummed…. FOR A WHOLE ASS MONTH while Achilles is gone (I guess… we all just… forgot about Helen? Or maybe things move slower in Ancient Greece).

Well either way Patroclus is sick of waiting, so he bursts into the king’s throne room and does this thing… called “supplication”… that I have never heard of before. But he puts a hand on his knee and grabs the king by the jaw, and he DEMANDS that Peleus tell him where Achilles is. Supplication is I guess… the act of… putting a king in a strong hold and it’s some kind of honor-bound thing that makes them have to tell the truth no matter what. (It’s recognized by the gods). It’s not considered a nice or polite thing to do, but apparently it’s a thing. Peleus squeals that Achilles’ Mom took him away to some small island… and I love this transformation from Patroclus. He’s just like “Okay neat, now give me money.”

So the king fucking does, and then he gets on a boat and sails like a badass to some remote little island where everyone sends their princesses to learn how to be sexy. It’s like Ancient Greece charm school island. Patroclus uses a fake name and enters the castle, finds that the king is old and decrepit, the guards are shitty (playing dice), and everything is run by this princess who is crazy beautiful but really shallow.

She invites Patroclus to dinner and invites the girls to dance for him. She joins them. And during their dance Patroclus realizes the princess’ dance partner is FUCKING ACHILLES. DRESSED LIKE A GIRL. Achilles spots him and interrupts the performance to tackle hug him, which sends the princess into a total fit.

APPARENTLY… Thetis the angry fish god mom didn’t want her son fighting in a war?? She thought it was too soon?? So for some reason her solution was to… kidnap him… and force him to pose as a woman on Hot Girl Island until the whole thing blew over. I am very confused at the reasoning there. MOREOVER Thetis forced him to MARRY the princess and have sex with her, so now she’s pregnant!!

Patroclus is of course devastated. Achilles is very uncharacteristically flustered and feels awful. His mom basically forced him to and promised that if he had sex with this broad, she’d go fetch Patroclus and bring him here. Patroclus is like “Oh my god you sweet dumb boyfriend, she NEVER DID. I had to put your father in a chokehold to figure out where you are.” And Achilles realizes he’s been tricked and feels bad.

They work it all out though and return to the palace. The old king is surprisingly fine with all of this as long as the baby gets to keep Achilles’ name. And Achilles, who is usually the nicest dude ever, is so cold to this princess. He’s not mean to her? But he acts like she’s invisible. Even Patroclus is like “Dude cut her some slack. She was tricked as much as you were.” But Achilles is all “Nope. I love nothing except my boyfriend.”

LIKE WHAT IS THETIS THE ANGRY FISH WOMAN UP TO?? I thought (and so did Pat) that she WANTED him to fight. Why was he even summoned back then?? If she wanted to keep him safe he could have just stayed on the mountain banging in the crystal cave.

I will hand it to this book, it keeps taking turns I didn’t see coming. Twice now I expected Achilles to be taken away and come back some battle-hardened, evil dude or something.

But to hear he’s just been crossdressing and hiding from war is pretty unexpected.

Oh geez so one night, Diedemantra (that is not her name. I can’t remember anyone’s name) — the PRINCESS has some guards go and grab Patroclus and she demands an audience with him. She says some truly awful things to him, about how ugly he is and she can’t believe Achilles chose him over her and she just SOBS for like a really long time, and Patroclus… because he is a sweet boy… actually really wants to comfort her. This quickly turns sexual. He totally isn’t into it, but she’s like… DEMANDING. And he goes through with it because I think he feels really sympathetic towards her? This is a wild scene and I can’t believe Pat does this… It’s Chapter 13 and he doesn’t really clarify if he ever tells Achilles, but it seems to bring both of them some closure. Achilles for feeling betrayed over them sleeping together, and Diedreoamtis over knowing Achilles is going to leave and he’ll never see him again.

So the whole time she’s gone, in isolation because she’s pregant, the boys have to stay at this island palace. Thetis still wants to keep Achilles hidden and away from the war, so he has to keep pretending to be a woman and Pat has to keep pretending to be Chirondes, some random dude who lives there now.

One day, a ship comes. And it’s carrying Odysseus and Diomedes, who threaten to tell everyone Achilles has been crossdressing if he doesn’t come fight in this war. They ALSO drop a bomb that Thetis hasn’t told them the full prophecy.

Achilles will be the greatest warrior that ever lived if and only if he goes to fight in Troy. If he doesn’t, he will start losing his god powers and wither away and die old and useless and having never done anything with this life. Oh, ALSO? If he goes to Troy he’s going to die. He’ll die young and die a crazy famous hero.

WHAT THE FUCK??

I’m over here with Patroclus like… about to cry.

But Achilles can’t imagine a life withering away and not achieving greatness. Pat totally understands… so our boys are OFF TO WAR. But not before Patroclus goes up on a mountain to scream at Thetis like a little badass. I love how gentle he is. And how soft. Until he’s pissed off and then he’s the ballsiest dude ever— grabbing kings by their chins. Screaming at goddesses that hate him. He gets out of Thetis that there’s more to the prophecy. That Achilles will die if Hector dies first. So we don’t know who Hector is, but Patroclus is like “Okay now we gotta keep this asshole from dying.” Thetis has also gotta be touched at how much Pat cares about defying the prophecy and saving his boyfriend. But she is also so SO PISSED at mortal men.

Alright so our boys are off to war.

Everyone sails to Troy. When they get to the island before Troy, the wind just STOPS because apparently Artemis is pissed off that there’s about to be so much bloodshed. So the kings are like “Hey let’s have a wedding to appease the gods and make a big sacrifice with cows and stuff.” — One of the kings has his 14 year old daughter brought in. And she’s all excited, thinking she is going to marry Achilles (he agreed, because why the fuck not. They need that wind.) — and the kings fucking AMBUSH HER and KILL HER as a human sacrifice before she or Achilles knows what’s going on. And it traumatizes him for a good few days. Sweet baby has never seen anyone die before. So this war is off to a great start.

But Artemis, like a fucking weirdo, is like “Okay thanks for slaughtering that 14 year old. I’m done being pissed now. Enjoy your war.” So the wind comes back. And the war starts. And after a few days of wallowing, Achilles goes out there and does the thing. He’s even the first person to throw a spear and kill a Trojan, which is great for morale. Achilles and Patroclus realize pretty quickly that Achilles is totally made for war. He’s CRAZY GOOD AT IT. So whatever trauma he was getting over heals very quickly, and our boy becomes a killing machine overnight.

Achilles doesn’t enjoy the MURDER part of it. He never hurts anyone that is unarmed. Only people that are coming at him with the intention of killing him, but I think he’s pretty entertained at how easy this is for him. Like a game.

Patroclus, sweet baby, is forced to fight at some point. Everyone is generally cool with him being there as Achilles’ companion, but eventually he has to play soldier and get in there. The battle sounds terrifying. You feel like you’re right in there with Pat and the noise and the chaos. But no one can touch him. He realizes it’s because of Achilles. ANy time a man looks at Pat and runs at him, Achilles kills them easily. He basically just STANDS THERE the whole time and does nothing and I don’t blame him because that’s what I’d do too.

That’s not to say Pat is useless. He’s really good at surgery and being a doctor and volunteers in the tents. He also encourages Achilles to “claim maidens” aka young girls stolen from the villages they’ve plundered. Only when they get them back to the tent, they clean them up and feed them and make sure they’re safe. The first time he does this, it’s so cute. The girl doesn’t understand Greek so to show her that he means to harm, Patroclus grabs Achilles and kisses him like “See? I don’t want you” lol and she becomes his best friend in the camp beside Achilles. Learns Greek and hangs out with him while his boyfriend is off fighting. She helps more maidens that get brought into their group (all the soldiers are like DAMN Achilles, you horn dog) — having no idea he is hella gay and just saving all these women from THEM.

This war goes on for like 4 years. It’s rumored that Helen doesn’t even like her husband and ran away to Troy for safety. Pretty soon all of the guys get grumpy like WHY ARE WE EVEN HERE? THIS SUCKS!!

It’s also wild to think that Achilles and Pat are like 20 now. Wow.

MOTHER. FUCKER.

I finished this whole ass review/description for this book, and it was perfect, and then my ipad totally crapped out and DELETED IT ALL!!! AAUGHGHGUGHG that hasn’t happened to me in so long… I go through such incredible lengths to make sure I never lose any writing. I’m so gutted.

So here’s like a shitty, watered down version of the last 25% of this book as told by someone a WEEK after they finished it. AUGH!!!!!!! AUGUAGAHGHAUGAGUGH.

Basically… like…okay. This war goes on for fucking ever lol. All the soldiers are pissed. The gods are apparently infighting with each other over this. At one point it’s like, festival time and the humans piss off the gods by arguing with each other, so they put a plague on the war camp. The gods really suck, by the way. Greek gods are just straight up crazy people. Everyone is dying of these horribly painful boils, and Achilles and Argmennon get into an argmennement. Argemenon steals Briesis (original saved maiden) as a personal slight to Achilles, since she’s technically a war prize and apparently not a person? With thoughts and feelings? We’re all horrified.

Achilles starts to get real ego-driven. Pat is over here freaking out because his best friend just got kidnapped and will likely be raped and Achilles is all about his pride and says “Everyone is going to think I’m a weakling. ARGMENNON NEEDS TO APOLOGIZE FIRST!”

So Pat goes to Argemonon’s tent and says Achilles refuses to fight until he apologizes, and if he rapes or hurts Briesis in any way, Achilles is going to use that as an excuse to kill him. So Argmenon is like “Cool bro thanks for the heads up. Real cool of you to betray your boyfriend by telling me this.” and agrees not to hurt Briesis. Pat gets his attention, by the way, by SLITTING HIS WRIST and BLEEDING all over the tent saying “I swear on a blood oath that my words are true! If you hurt that woman Achilles WILL kill you!” And Argemennon is like “JESUS OKAY! I believe you, just STOP bleeding on all my shit!”

Pat goes back to Achilles, and Achilles is PISSED. (But also concerned over Pat’s wrist). He wanted Briesis to get hurt so he’d have an excuse to murder this guy – which again – Pat is just like, horrified by. I should also mention that at some point, Briesis confessed to Pat that she loves him, and wished she could be with him and have kids together. He is hella gay, but loves her like a sister best friend and just really wants to protect her. So Achilles goes on for a few weeks being a dick (Argemnon is also being a dick, but at least he’s not hurting Briesis) – and the Greeks are getting their asses handed to them by the Trojians because Achilles refuses to let his army fight.

Thetis shows up with more grim prophecies from the gods. Like “Achilles will only die after the best of the [M-word-for-their-country-of-origin] dies.” And Pat is like “Huh… you are the best of our men, though. What a weird riddle.” And I’m reading this like…sobbing.

Eventaully the Trojans break into the camp and start murdering everyone and burning the ships.

Pat is begging Achilles at this point (because by now it’s been like 10 years and we have women and children and families in here). He HAS to fight. But Achilles refuses. So Pat comes up with this idea…. “Well what if I put on your armor and pretend to be you, and inspire the men to fight and defend the camp? Then it’s like we rally the troops without you actually having to go back on your stupid, pointless pride?”

And Achilles goes…. “SURE!!”

(It’s more nuanced than that, and to his credit, Achilles is worried sick. Begs the chariot driver to just do a lap and come back ASAP) Normally he’s there to kill anyone who looks at Patroclus.

Pat is so cute wearing this armor, and totally does an incredible job pretending to be Achilles. He even kicks ass and kills a couple people, including this HUGE HULKING GENERAL even though Achilles begged him to not put himself in danger. Well Pat does really well, but ends up dying in battle. Hector kills him. The best of the M-word-country-of-origins is dead.

The soldiers manage to bring his body back, but Achilles DOES NOT TAKE THIS WELL.

Just like… totally unhinged broken, hugging the body in his bed all night. Inconsolable. When they finally get him to let go of Pat’s body and have a funeral, Briesis tears into him and says what we’re all thinking: “Dude he’s only dead because of your pride. Everyone loves this kid. He’s like the nicest, sweetest, cutest dude in this camp. He knew everyone’s name. He delivered all the babies. Like. He only went out there because he wanted to protect us and you were too busy being a prideful dick trying to make a point and HE’S DEAD AND I HATE YOU AND AAHAHHHHHH!!!!” and Achilles is like “I KNOW!!! DON’T YOU THINK I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING MURDERED NOW? Bring on the prophecy. I’m done. I’m so fucking done. Let’s do this. Where’s my sword?”

So Achilles spends the next few days being a fucking demon on the battlefield. He murders a great many important people, including injuring a river god. Like he’s just unstoppable. He kills Hector. Then… weirdly… drags his body behind the chariot and like… drags it around camp for a few days. FOR A FEW DAYS. Just beating it up for funnies. Like a crazy person.

Eventually though, he gets shot by Paris with a special arrow from Apollo. And he dies.

All of this is relayed to us by Pat, by the way, who has been here all this time as a spirit. In Greek mythology, you can’t pass on to the underworld until you get 1. A funeral and 2. A tombstone. Everyone knew Achilles was going to die eventually, so they put his ashes with Patroclus’ ashes (as he requested). Pat wonders if he can feel it when their ashes are combined, but he can’t. He can’t see Achilles until they’re both in the underworld.

So one day this little piece of shit named Pyyros comes to the camp. He is Achilles’ son that Thetis stole and raised to be a bloodthirsty asshole away from humans. And he’s basically Geoffrey. He’s also, hypothetically, what Achilles could have been if he wasn’t raised by his father and grew up with someone sweet like Patroclus.

Pyyros is 12, but he’s like… horrible. With his help, they eventually topple Troy. But he also wants to rape all the women in the camp, and when Briesis runs, he kills her with a spear. HATE HIM. Also?? When the kings ask him what he wants to do with Achilles and Patroclus’ grave, he’s like “Fuck Patroclus. Leave him off the tombstone. He’s a nobody.”

So ghost Pat is like… HORRIFIED. This means he’ll be trapped on earth forever. He haunts Odysseus’ dreams and begs him to try to change this kid’s mind, and he tries, but fails.

So the book ends with Ghost Patroclus sitting (and sobbing) by Achilles’ grave, watching tourists come and pay their respects for months or possibly even years. Meanwhile, Pyyros gets murdered on the ship home becasue the kings collectively decide he’s an asshole. I’m glad everyone can agree on something for once. Like murdering this awful demon child.

Thetis shows up and talks to Pat. She’s still cold, but oddly remorseful. She asks Pat to tell her everything he remembers about Achilles. And Pat gushes for paragraphs and paragraphs about all of their happy memories. And the great, kind person Achilles was before he got tainted by war and the promise of greatness. Thetis probbaly has a growth moment, realizing HEY maybe there’s more to life than training your kids to be unstoppable killing machines. This whole final chapter is so sweet. Patroclus, despite everything, loves Achilles so much. And Achilles, even though his ego got in his way near the end there, really always loved Patroclus. He never wanted him to get hurt or be put in danger.

Thetis surprises Pat by writing his name on the tombstone next to Achilles’, and he gets transported to the underworld immediately. And there he reunites with Achilles, and that’s the end of the story.

Here’s that excerpt:

“I have done it,” she says.

At first I do not understand. But then I see the tomb, and the marks she has made on the stone. ACHILLES, it reads. And beside it, PATROCLUS.

“Go,” she says. “He waits for you.”

IN THE DARKNESS, two shadows, reaching through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their hands meet, and light spills in a flood like a hundred golden urns pouring out the sun.

When I picked up this book, I didn’t know it was a retelling of the Iliad. And my stupid uncultured ass had never read the Iliad. But what the author did that was so cool was she took a character, Patroclus, who was pretty minor in the original story, and wrote the book from his perspective. And blew out this whole beautiful romance between him and Achilles, when apparently this is only speculated in the ancient text (But I mean… Achilles going berserk with anger after Pat gets killed is pretty telling).

In my original review, I wrote that I had a little trouble connecting to the characters. I think just because of all the formal ancient-speak. But after a week of thinking on it, I take that back. I really love how pure Patroclus is. He’s just so GOOD and so sweet and gentile in a world that is raw and barbaric and cruel. You experience the outrage with him. This feeling of standing around a war wondering why we’re even fucking doing this when Helen doesn’t want to be rescued at all. It’s just an excuse for a bunch of men to flex their power and get a bunch of people killed.

I like Achilles a little more now that I’ve had time to percolate on him. He’s dealing with having been primed for greatness since birth, and taught to seek his value in that. Also, he was told his choices were basically to persue greatness or wither away into uselessness. So of course he got really prideful and easily insulted near the end there. It was hella shitty that he was willing to have Briesis and a bunch of innocent people killed to make his point. That was where he messed up. And that’s why Pat became almost like… a sacrifice for that decision. Which Achilles was properly devastated by.

These boys love each other so much and feel so star crossed in a world that feels determined to ruin it for them. I loved the last chapter where Pat and Thetis have a heart to heart and she shows him a great kindness by writing his name on the tombstone. I just loved that.

I’m still going to give this book a 6.5 out of 10, but I really did enjoy it. There were just some parts that were hard to get through because I was so frustrated by the arrogance of Achilles and the kings!!!!

Deadass Rating: 6.5/10

Unofficial theme song: “The King” by Lor

#madeline miller #song of achilles #achilles #patroclus #achilles x patroclus #patrochilles #book recommendations #book reviews #deadass book review #book review #deadass book reviews

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