#this post is all over the place but hopefully it's still coherent

[blorbosinmyheadcentral]

your art makes me explode in a positive way like

im chewing and swallowing it in an aggressive way like

it's just SO good im melting ilove your shading and KEHEKEBEKJDJF

anwayshi hello do you happen to have any headcanons for showtime rolls on the floor and dies

Thank you so much, really appreciate it!

Oh God I don't know if this will read as coherent because my thoughts about Showtime are all over the place. But I'll try to format this the best I can

✨Showtime HCs! ✨

Their relationship starts when they start spending time together.

(The reason why they do so could vary. In Supervised Machine Learning's case, Pomni becomes something of a "tutor" to Caine; They discover that they work well together, and the other's company can be quite pleasant!).

So Pomni and Caine build a weird, but comforting friendship, and all is well.

Then the feelings appear.

Caine is the first to realize he fell in love.

It sounds illogical but hear me out… it'd be really funny--

Ok no seriously I think Caine can actually feel. Keyword "can". He's very much still a machine and it shows in the pilot. But like his inspiration (AM), Caine is also a rogue AI. Whatever his programming originally intended him to do, he probably doesn't follow it as closely now as back when he was created (which is a whole other post).

Caine knows what love is and the extend it can go, since the Moon is so open about her feelings. He just doesn't like the Moon back specifically haha (sorry Moon) :}

All this to say, I do believe this is within the realm of possibility for him. (Not that it's ever gonna happen towards anyone in the show. These are just wishful shippy thoughts).

He might not recognize it as love at first, because it manifests in such a different way from his one reference point.

His friendship with Pomni had gone through phases.

When they first met, he continuously touched her with no concern for how she felt.

Learning from and about Pomni herself led him to come to respect her boundaries (and becoming mindful of everyone else's).

Then they're close friends, and gradually, Pomni does not mind his regular wacky, touchy-feely self. So Caine acts as he had always done before.

Caine expresses his love for Pomni with physical gestures and his undivided attention.

When they teleport to travel to other places, he holds her close so she doesn't get too dizzy; he pats her head to reassure her; he touches her arm to get her attention; he grabs her hands when he's excited about her ideas; he holds eye contact for prolonged periods of time; and he touches, and touches, and touches, and touches.

It's selfish, and so he keeps it buried in his deepest 0's and 1's. But he'd like to keep hanging out with Pomni, having her in his sight, and feel the texture of her gloved hands until the end of time.

Despite all this, to him, virtually nothing changed.

What? He's spending time with Pomni as he'd always been doing, and behaving as he'd always behaved!

It's Bubble of all people that has to point out that, "Hey boss. I think you WANT her!"

Absurd. Nonsense. Preposterous! It is merely a relationship of mutual support and affection between a ringmaster and his trusted, former-human companion. Nothing more.

(Declaring his love to her unprompted didn't ever cross his mind, so there's no way it could be that. Is there?)

Caine finds out that yes, there is.

Pomni had always been a nervous wreck, but her mind state becomes more manageable over time. She eventually adjusts to the circus life like everyone else did.

"Accepting" her fate is a different story. The will to escape, to remember, never really leaves. She's just more careful about it.

So when she starts working with Caine - to improve life so people don't go abstracting anymore, and hopefully find a definitive exit - she's not expecting to end up liking her time with him.

Not that she'd absolutely hate it, either. He's… "okay"… Just-- outlandish, loud, he keeps invading her personal space, he keeps touching her, and it makes her die a little every time.

If he's up to listening, though… it can't be that bad, right?

Turns out that no, it wasn't that bad.

Yes, he is outlandish, loud, he keeps invading her personal space and touching her. But she explains what she means to him, clearly and patiently, and he makes an effort to do better. An actual effort.

Sometimes he'd misinterpret what she meant - the ambiguity of human language - and the new games would go horribly. But little by little, his efforts make life overall better. Something reminiscent of actual, real life, the one they've all forcibly left behind.

And he tries, and he tries, and Pomni finds herself enjoying the process as much as the good results.

Pomni likes Caine's eagerness to learn. His enthusiastic attitude borders on silly, and the absurdity makes her laugh on occasion. When faced with the prospect of a "real" exit, she loves his upbeat optimism.

When she's not hanging out with Ragatha, Jax, Gangle, Zooble and Kinger, she begins to enjoy spending quality time with Caine.

Each one of their hang outs is a new surprise. They make a picnic in the tallest mountain exactly in between day and night. They learn to dance - while floating in the air. "Since you asked, here's a DIGITAL camera! Let's take pictures of the Void for one tenth of a second at a time!"

Sometimes he just comes by Pomni's room, and they end up losing track of time. Just chatting about how things have been, what they could be, and what to do next. Ideas and ideas and ideas.

Before Pomni knows it, she's comfortable enough that recalling his old habits makes her not dread them anymore. So when Caine stands close and lightly touches her arm due to oversight, she makes sure he knows it's all right.

And they keep spending time together, and he touches, and touches, and touches her. Pomni, in turn, feels lighter, and lighter, and lighter. Peaceful, at ease. Dare she say, happy, even.

Life is not perfect. As it stands though, it's good enough. No one has abstracted. No one is at risk of abstracting so far.

Progress is slow, but the research for an exit continues, and she is hopeful. The thought of actually leaving grows closer to reality. But a part of her feels heavy.

When it occurs to Pomni that leaving the Amazing Digital Circus means leaving Caine behind, she is alarmed by how much she'll miss him.

It'll hurt. Badly. So much the thought pains her even now.

The moment Pomni realizes this, she comes to the unexpected conclusion that she may like Caine a little more than she thought she would.

This later leads to an interesting discussion with Ragatha.

By the time Pomni comes to that conclusion, Caine is already down bad.

Neither has any idea that the other is in love with them.

Cue dumbasses trying to deal with their feelings while the potential conflict the escape brings looms over their heads.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk!

#showtime #tadc showtime #caine x pomni #pomni x caine #showtime ship #cherpiet #Really appreciate how their dynamic can blur the line of friendship/romance so easily #Supervised Machine Learning is just. *gestures at all that*. minus the romance #Also sorry for taking so long to answer the ask I am not good at answering asks #I don't always know what to say #I wish I had what gooseworx has. She is a big insp #long post

[fuedalreesespieces]

Inuyasha & Demisexuality

i think halfway into writing this i thought about just cramming all my thoughts into a semi-coherent rant due to a combination of a.) lack of access to decent translations of the manga and b.) paranoia about over-analyzing scenes and coming off as delusional (i think by now it's probably too late to thwart that claim) buuut this headcanon in particular is near and dear to me so i want to try and get as in depth as possible.

what is demisexuality?

in simple terms, demisexuality is when an individual doesn't experience primary attraction - that is, the sort of attraction based on immediate observable (often physical) characteristics - and instead only experiences secondary attraction first: the type of attraction that forms after the development of a deep emotional bond.

inuyasha and kikyo

this aforementioned term perfectly describes inuyasha and his relationships with the only women he's ever loved romantically. you could make the claim that his inability to feel primary attraction first stems from his trust issues and not inherent sexual orientation. and to that, i would disagree - he and kikyo develop an emotional bond despite an unspoken lack of trust, which may have improved had naraku not meddled in their lives. still, both find solace in each other's similarities, loneliness, and "outlier" status (though the similarities are in isolation only, if i'm being completely honest) and establish a connection that persists post-revival.

inuyasha eventually did start to feel primary attraction to kikyo during their time together - in the second chapter of the manga, when he compares kagome to her, he states that kikyo "looked pretty."

[source - viz. i haven't been in this fandom long, but what i've gathered is that there are a lot of mis-translations of this manga, even from viz. since i have yet to buy physical copies of the manga and don't have an account for the site, i'm going to be using fan-scans for the rest of these, which hopefully won't really affect what i'm trying to convey since i'll be looking at character expressions rather than dialogue for most of them.]

i'd also note the order in which he lists those traits: kikyo looked intelligent and pretty. her intelligent appearance is the first part of her he remembers, which i think underscores his priorities in this regard. he values things like intelligence and companionship - facets that come to light when developing secondary attraction towards someone - more than aspects of primary attraction.

inuyasha and kagome

as mentioned before, demisexuals don't feel physical attraction before establishing a tight emotional bond. the most blatant examples i could think of this were any instances in which inuyasha sees kagome nude and his difference in reaction - in particular, during the yura of the hair and togenkyo arcs, which are roughly seventy-three chapters apart. there are two new moons in that time, and from that we can say at least two months have passed.

chapter six: yura of the hair

kagome's bathing below him, and i'm sorry, but this expression literally screams "zero fucks given." he does not care in the slightest. not a blush. not a spot of red on his cheeks. not a sweatdrop. not a tee-hee. if i were to describe what he's feeling in this moment i would say "extreme ire." when she uses the sit command on him, it's on the assumption that he's "peeking," but kaede understands that it's actually because inuyasha is trying to steal a shard of the shikon jewel.

"huh?" - he sounds genuinely confused that she reached that conclusion, even though he was quite literally peering over the cliff's edge in what obviously has very perverse connotations. it's almost like he doesn't understand why kagome would think his actions come from a place of sexual attraction because that sort of thing just isn't on his mind at all, and he doesn't get why it would be in the first place.

another extremely blatant example can be see in miroku's introductory chapter: chapter 51, the delinquent priest:

do i even have to say anything. this scene also further emphasizes my previous point - before, the only reason he was there was to try and steal kagome's jewel shard. if his true intentions had been driven by primary attraction, this would have been an opportune moment to "peep." in his words, however, he just isn't interested. note that he could have said something along the lines of "i wouldn't do something like that" (which, if he was attracted to her in that way from the start, wouldn't have done anyway) but specifically i'm not interested. the primary attraction is not there in the slightest. at least, not until:

chapter eighty two: fateful night in togenkyo

the scene i'm talking about needs no introduction, but for context: kagome's half-freaking out after having woken up in a sake bath. inuyasha breaks down the door to come and rescue her, accidentally seeing her naked in the process. well, i'm sure his reaction won't be that dif-

...it's only one panel-

okay, two-

i think at this point it's fairly obvious that primary attraction has developed. besides the fact that he's spent three panels trying not to look like he's having a quasi allergic reaction, it's been approximately two months since they've met, and by now they've definitely formed the deep emotional bond required for him to begin feeling any primary attraction at all. in fact, the chapter where he tells kagome "there's no replacement for you" - that chapter, where he's vulnerable and honest and opening up to her, strengthening their bond further, (ch. 78, a tender smell) is directly before the togenkyo arc begins, and, thus, just before these scenes occur. these chapters have all been building up secondary attraction, and now that primary attraction is just starting to show up.

several chapters later we have this iconic panel from 173:

this is such a look of awe, as though he's gazing up at a goddess. jaw dropped, eyes-wide, words trailing off awe. he's entranced. fully head-over-heels in love, feeling both primary and secondary attraction in regards to kagome, and this trend only continues throughout the entirety of the manga.

conclusion + extra thoughts

my belief in this headcanon comes from not just the evidence depicted above, but because i just related a ton reading those scenes. i found myself just nodding along (as someone who's demisexual themselves!) plus, since ace-spectrum representation is so rare, it's nice to see it reflected in a character whose story and relationships i love dearly.

tags: @nightshade-lullaby

#sorry this is formatted badly lmao #anyway we should totally make this a fandom consensus guys trust me #i realize i could have done this during inuvember's pride day #but i STILL haven't finished reading the manga (excuse: university) and wanted to give this post the more detailed explanations it deserve #honestly i'm ass at analysis but i hope this makes some sense #inuyasha #inumeta #inuyasha headcanons #inukag #inukik #i suppose #kagome higurashi #inuyasha x kagome #inuyasha a feudal fairy tale #inuyasha anime #inuyasha manga #demisexual #ace spectrum #next analysis: me crying about the jineji chapters and its impact on inukag #u dont understand how FERAL those chapters make me

[cosmicjoke]

Hi again,

I haven't had time to organize my thoughts coherently so this might be a bit disorganized, apologies in advance lol.

We all know that Levi takes it upon himself in the AOT universe to be responsible for the lives of others, probably because he's the only one who has the strength he does. But does Levi ever expect others to want to care about their fellow humans' lives (especially those in power)? His own value of life might be so obvious to him, so would he expect others to share his value of life? Whether in AOT universe or in the modern world (if he did live in our modern world and didn't have the superhuman strength he does). I mean, in AOT universe, it's clear he can singlehandedly make significant contributions to saving the lives of others, but in the modern world, most of us obviously just aren't that physically strong and/or have very little actual power or authority on our own to help those who are oppressed, victimized, killed even...in the modern world, it's really a collective effort. Our strength is in numbers. So i guess my question is, would Levi hold that expectation of others in the modern world? Like, what if he was placed in a situation where he didn't have the superhuman strength he does, and has to rely on the goodwill and cooperation and *desire to help* of others in order to help people. He values life immensely, but it's also clear that he realizes that perfect peace in humanity is an unachievable ideal, right? Like human violence against other humans has always been and will always be a thing, both in his universe and ours. So while he probably expects that there will always be people who just want to harm their fellow humans, does he also always expect there to be people who want the opposite?

If he *does* hold that expectation for others, do you think he feels disappointment when he is inevitably let down, and he comes face to face over and over again with the fact that some other people simply do not care for fellow human lives? Or does he just set his expectations for others so low that he thinks it's a default for people to behave in that way? And whenever he does meet someone else who values life as much as he does, it's more like just a pleasant bonus rather than a given?

hopefully any of that word vomit made sense lol

These are great questions you're asking me, haha! So first, let me just say thank you. I really enjoy this sort of conversation about Levi.

It's interesting about Levi, because while he has this great strength, and he utilizes it the best he can to help others, he's still faced, more often than not, with sort of his own sense of helplessness. He often isn't able to save as many lives as he wants to, or make as much change as he hopes. He said something along those lines to Hitch, during the Uprising arc, when she was criticizing the SC for getting so many people killed in Trost while trying to capture Annie. He said "Hmph... It makes me sick. We're all in the dark when it comes to how this world works. Other than the ones in the very center, of course..." So I think, even within the setting of the AoT universe, Levi still feels pretty powerless, the same as he would if he lived in a modern world and didn't have his Ackerman powers. I think that's also pretty evident post time skip, after they've lost Erwin. Levi sees himself as a tool, as a weapon to be wielded by others. That's what he views his strength as good for. For Levi, Erwin was the person he sort of relied on to utilize that strength to its maximum potential, and when he lost Erwin, I think Levi felt a definite sense of directionlessness. He wasn't sure anymore how to use his strength to help others, even as the desire to do so remained just as strong. I think it was similar to how Levi felt when he was living in the Underground. He wanted to help people, but there wasn't much he could actually do. He was trapped in poverty and desperation with everyone else down there, and being physically powerful, while it can help in some things, isn't going to do much when we're talking about social inequality or oppression. Isayama said that Levi came to the surface because he wanted to help people, something he realized he was able to do after Furlan and Isabel came into his life; but his circumstances and status Underground limited his options. He didn't have citizenship, for one thing, so he couldn't officially join any sort of service branch, like the military. So I think Levi was always very familiar, even with his exceptional physical strength, with this feeling of helplessness and powerlessness, and a sense of being unable to do much to help others, despite his desperate wish to.

So, going into what you asked about Levi's expectations of others in that regard, I think Levi definitely WANTS people to care about others and to have the same level of respect and sense of value for life that he does. But that doesn't necessarily mean he expects them to be able to protect life or help others in the same capacity that he does. In fact, I think Levi understands and is sympathetic toward people not being able to do much to improve theirs or others circumstances. During his speech to the 104th during the Uprising arc, he speaks about choosing the hell of people killing each other over the hell of being eaten by titans. What he means by that is that he wants people to have a choice. As things stood then, the people of the walls were essentially living in a giant prison. They were trapped and had no options, no freedom, no choice in how they lived or where they went, and through no fault of their own, through no action on their part. It was just how they were born, the circumstances they were born into. So, yes, while Levi definitely understands and is accepting of human nature, of the violence inherent to human nature, and while I think he understands more keenly than anyone the tragedy and inescapability of that reality, he also believes the way people live should be up to them, and he prefers them having that choice, even if it manifests in violence and killing each other, to them having no choice at all and still dying. He calls both realities hell, but the hell in which people get to at least have a say in what happens to them is better than things happening to them which they have no control over.

Levi himself grew up in an environment which left him with no option but to rely on violence in order to survive. So yeah, I think he definitely understands that sometimes people just don't have a choice and that they can't always do the "good" or "right" thing, according to society, depending on the circumstances. He understands that sometimes you need to kill in order to protect yourself or others. He understands that sometimes you need to steal in order to survive. A lot of the characters in AoT look at morality as a static concept, through a black and white lends. They categorize things in two ways, good and bad, and there is no in between. Levi is one of the only characters that understands the fallacy of that premise. Morality isn't static. It's on a sliding scale and it's complex. What's good and bad, what's right and wrong, depends on the circumstances, depends on the situation. It's not always wrong to kill someone. It's not always wrong to steal. It's not always wrong to use violence. It doesn't always define a person's morality or reflect on their worth as a person if they do something which, within normal society, would be considered "bad" or "illegal". I always talk about how Levi is probably the least judgmental character in AoT, along with probably Armin. Levi never tries to tell anyone what to do or what they should think or believe. He always lets other people come to their own conclusions and choices.

With that said, what I do think Levi wouldn't be accepting of and what would really disgust him in another person is a total disregard for life. And that's why Levi hates Zeke as much as he does. Because Zeke shows, repeatedly, not just a deliberate disregard for life, but he also repeatedly expresses actual pleasure in the taking of it. We see Levi express similar disdain for Eren after the raid on Liberio, when he compares Eren's actions to the scum he grew up with in the Underground. What we know from this is that Levi no doubt witnessed a lot of blatant disregard for life while growing up, a lot of people treating the lives of others as worthless, taking life without needing to, just because they felt like it or because they simply didn't care and were apathetic toward other people's lives, and we also know it's something Levi has always felt disgusted by. So while I think Levi is both sympathetic and empathetic toward people not always being able to act and help others, and also toward them sometimes having to engage in certain types of behavior and actions that society would generally frown upon, what I think he wouldn't forgive and would be extremely judgmental toward is deliberate cruelty, dismissiveness and a contempt shown toward life and what he believes is its inherent value. I think, to Levi, that's unforgivable. So while Levi understands the reality that there will always be people who deliberately want to harm others, and who take pleasure in harming others, that doesn't mean he has to like it or forgive it. He accepts that violence is just a part of the world and a part of human nature, and he accepts and even forgives that people are sometimes forced to violence. What he won't forgive is intentional cruelty and disregard shown toward life.

So I think Levi probably is disappointed in the sense that he wishes things could be better, that people could be better in general, while at the same time acknowledging that this is just the way people are and there's nothing he can really do about it. I don't think he necessarily has low expectations, but I think he's always ready to be faced with the ugly side of human behavior. But still, he'll determine the worth of a person's character based on how much respect they have toward life, I think. Again, if someone shows a blatant disregard for life, or shows they don't value life in a truly meaningful way, Levi's not going to think very much of that person. We see that demonstrated in his disgust, also, for the nobility and their greed and selfishness in how they treat the general populace.

#Levi Ackerman #attack on titan #shingkei no kyojin #analysis #meta #commentary

[thesweetnessofspring]

So I was going to make this a Reddit post (since up until this week that was the only place to have any kind of real discussion online about Crazy Ex-Girlfriend), but I took too much time to think it over so now it has to go here. I can't hold it in anymore.

Nathaniel is a poorly conceived character and lacks a genuinely earned change of character as a result.

Warning: This is a long rant, hopefully with a point at the end. I just have so many complaints I hoped I pulled them together in a coherent way.

First, to be clear, Scott is amazing. No complaints on the acting.

But the character? For a show that took stereotypes and showed the human behind them in a a way that was grounded despite the ridiculous nature of the show, they just fell absolutely flat with Nathaniel's character.

Obviously Nathaniel is the "rich boy/antagonistic lover" romcom cliche. I think that is the first part which created a hurdle, because CXG is set in West Covina, not Scarsdale. The other characters are normal and relatable. I've seen Josh and Greg get more criticism for their characters than Nathaniel (which is honestly so ridiculous to me) and I think part of it is because we all know Joshes who haven't learned to grow up and be someone a partner could actually depend on. We all know Gregs who are bitter and make sarcastic comments and bring down the vibe in the room. So it's easier to hate them because they're grounded in our world. But it's rarer to know a Nathaniel, so the show builds his character based not how real rich people act, but perpetuates the idea that movies and TV shows have put in our head about rich people.

Why is Nathaniel a jerk? BECAUSE HIS DADDY DIDN'T LOVE HIM! WAAAAAA! HIS DADDY WAS SO MEAN TO HIM! POOR NATHANIEL IT'S NOT HIS FAULT YOU CAN'T BLAME HIM FOR TRYING TO HAVE JOSH'S GRANDFATHER MURDERED!

I know that parent issues can come across cliche anyway, but really? The rich boy's daddy puts pressure on him and doesn't give him affection? THAT'S the best they could come up with? Some Logan Huntzburger knock-off?

I loved CXG from the beginning because of how real it feels despite its ridiculous tone. I remember watching the first episode and feeling so excited, because wow! West Covina was so much like the SoCal town I grew up in and the characters I could tell were already like people I actually knew! Nathaniel failed in this way.

I used to work on occasion with rich people as a legal assistant. I saw a few third-generation rich people that Nathaniel was supposed to be like. Do you know what kind of so-called "men" they were? They were all spoiled man-children whose daddies were bailing them out of their legal problems with money, lying, cheating, and committing perjury. They were able to use their family wealth to dick around, not do any real work, and yet keep living life high. Did they have good parents? Hell no! Did they have parents who pushed them to the point of perfection? Hell no! These spoiled rich babies always got whatever they wanted, no consequences. And that is what made their parents so bad.

For Nathaniel to be so rich he has his own private jet, and yet be pushed to work so hard is not the way it actually works with people that wealthy. Yes, for rich people who are still on the lower-end of "rich" their kids will have to go to a good school and pursue a career with money-making potential. But Nathaniel has little need to do any actual work.

If you want a more well-known comparison: Donald Trump is a third-generation rich person. After all that came out in the media, you can't tell me that Donald Trump was pushed to perfection by his daddy.

And then there are other things that bug me like, Nathaniel is a water polo player...but that isn't a rich person sport. Not in SoCal anyway. A kid from my high school actually went to Stanford to play on their water polo team (like Nathaniel) and I come from an area that is very middle class at best. West Covina should not have been the place he was first exposed to normal people! He even says that his water polo team were his brothers, who would have been made up of normal people because water polo is not a rich person's sport. Which makes me wonder why it wasn't until West Covina Nathaniel starts "becoming nice." You're telling me away from his dad, as an independent adult, spending HOURS with normal people including traveling for games and team bonding, and it takes a lady with big boobs and a quirky personality to make him "nice"??? I'm not quite as familiar with Stanford culture, but again, from the people I know who went there, it's not as much of a rich people haven as the east coast prestigious school (from my understanding). Then Nathaniel's parents house looks like it's straight-up from Gilmore Girls (again the Logan Huntzburger comparison) when rich people's houses in LA look nothing like that. Why in a show so based in California culture are they making him into an east-coast cliche? He's a mirror of Rebecca, sure, but then why make him from LA if they based his character off of east coast old money? California is new money! Even if the wealth is across generations, it is not at all like east coast old money at all!

So in terms of keeping the character based in actually seeing this type of person in real life? I'd give Nathaniel...2/10. Just because how cruel he is at the start is how real-life rich people act so he gets a point for that.

And another thing that annoys me about Nathaniel is how hard the writers went to try and make him sympathetic. Because if you have a character who is straight-up sexually harassing a female employee, cheating on his lovely girlfriend, verbally and mentally abusing his employees they have to make him even more uwu than the other romantic leads. So they always pull out things to try and make people say, "Awwww, but he likes the zoo! And monkeys! Look at him hugging that alligator all sad! And he reads Harry Potter?! He's just a lil nerd!!" (at the time people still liked Harry Potter) I just feel manipulated by these "isn't he so cute?!" additions to Nathaniel's character. I don't see them as a natural fleshing out of the character, I see them as the writers trying to wave me over to distract me from just how downright awful he is as a person. And that makes me resent him more. Like...ok, you go to the zoo Nathaniel...but you were still going to have an immigrant deported and ripped away from his family, you jerk.

Rebecca does messed up things, too. But the show gives her a diagnosis, she goes to therapy, they at least show her apologize to Josh about what she put him through, as well as the hormone-induced attempt to take a hit on Mona to Nathaniel, and own up to what she did to Paula. Nathaniel's response to trying to send a hitman to murder Josh's grandfather was "in my defense, I was promised sex." He never apologizes??? really apologizes??? to ANYONE??? He doesn't go to therapy or even get a life coach or...anything. I guess he does nice things for people (while reminding them HE'S NICE NOW and DEMANDING they get over the fact that he, again, TRIED TO HAVE THEIR GRANDFATHER MURDERED). I would argue that Nathaniel is way more messed up than Rebecca and doesn't do a fraction of the owning up to his past that she did, which imo is still lacking overall.

Like my dudes, Greg has his AA meetings, even Josh goes to therapy. But the objectively worst regular character on the show...doesn't. Huh.

And I think that's what drives me so bonkers about Nathaniel's character. Yes, Rebecca is this force that comes into West Covina and changes people's lives, but it makes sense for other people. She shows Heather unironic joy. She challenges Valencia's relationship with Josh, which pushes Valencia to grow. She gives life to Paula's dreams again. And I'd argue Greg is more changed by the result of their relationship (the DUI he got trying to drive to talk to her) more than Rebecca herself just being that amazing. But Nathaniel's character comes in hard and cruel. His actions and attitude are the kind that in real life, are above what I've seen ever actually change because it is so steeped in enormous privilege. Nathaniel would need to be drastically, drastically, and for a significant length of time humbled--not just pooping his pants in the office. And I'd say even that would likely be a stretch. The writers made him so unbearable to start that I can't believe even Rebecca could really help him change. Imo, they don't show it. They chalk it up to "he just wants to have sex with her really bad...and...uh...yeah his feelings are now just that strong for her. Mmmmhmmm, a woman really can change a man by his sheer desire for her!"

I just think they bit off more than they could chew with Nathaniel. I get they were going with another romcom cliche, but that cliche was too out there to start with and they jumped fully on board with it, not realizing that the strength of their characters are in how they reflect people we actually know. Nathaniel's character sticks out as not belonging or fitting in because he's simply a stock character they didn't add any real depth or nuance to or any earned change. His character being so privileged makes turning him into a good person all that more challenging.

And if I'm being honest? Since you've made it all the way down here...I do wonder what it would have been the response if Scott weren't so good-looking or white. Josh Chan, whose worst crime is a toss up between kissing Rebecca while with Valencia or leaving Rebecca at the altar without communicating with her at all about it, gets more derision from the fandom than Nathaniel, who again, would have orchestrated someone's murder without a second thought. I understand why Nathaniel is so popular, but it makes me worried that even a show as progressive as CXG with fans who have the same mindset still give such a quick pass to a handsome rich white boy.

#cxg #crazy ex girlfriend #anti nathaniel plimpton #anti nathaniel #mostly a rant with a small side of analysis

[ronniescribbles]

Quiet Little Koala

Sniper x Nonverbal!Little!Reader

710 Words

You can read it on AO3 here!

Exhausted and nonverbal, you pound on Sniper's van door. Despite it being so late at night, you know that he's the one that'll keep you safe, no matter what.

A/N: shout out to all you nonverbal littles out there💖 you're valid and loved!! this fic is mostly gender neutral, but uses the term "sheila" once, which is a typically feminine term, so please be cautious if you think that'll upset you♡ but otherwise, i love some soft cg!sniper, and i hope you will too!🥰

ps: i have another snape fic and a scout fic (featuring spy, too!) in the works, so look forward to those eventually~👀 and i should be posting my character list/writing info soon :)

Sniper shot up from his bed, immediately robbed of the light sleep he had barely managed to fall into. 

----------------------------------------------

Knock knock knock! 

"Ugh, it's like three in the bloody mornin'.." He muttered to himself, rolling out of cotton bedsheets and dragging tired feet on his faux-wooden floor. 

Knock knock knock knock knock! 

"Alright, alright," came his voice thick with all-too-familiar grogginess, "whaddya want?" With a soft thud, he stumbled onto the door; the jangling of a chain and lock followed, and a pause, jangling, and then the final pull of a handle. 

Relieved to have unlocked the bloody thing in half-coherence, he swung the door open. The moonlight showcased you, puffy-eyed and disheveled, staring blankly at him. Confusion struck, but the rest of him instinctually softened as he realized it was, in fact, just you there. He leaned into the doorframe and squinted, obviously trying to get a better view of you without outright saying it. 

But wait, what exactly were you doing here at his doorstep this late at night? Sometimes you were too afraid to even walk through the base's dark hallways past midnight. How'd you even manage to come all the way out here in the dead of night? 

"Christ, sweetheart, ya really spooked me there. What happened to ya? I mean, are you alright?" 

You only nodded in response as you moseyed into the makeshift living room. Tonight was one of those nights where you didn't really want to talk about anything. Well, you couldn't, and you were too small to even think of trying to make yourself. You hoped you could escape to Sniper's camper van oasis of quiet and calm, but you'd forgotten that he didn't exactly know about your nonverbal tendencies. Hopefully, he wouldn't pay too much attention to it..

"You're awfully quiet there, sheila. Ya sure nothing happened?" He carefully stepped out of the doorframe. He couldn't quite pinpoint what was wrong, but he could definitely feel it nonetheless. 

Again, a nod followed the question, and only a nod. You climbed into his cramped bed and curled up under the covers. It wasn't the most comfortable, and you wondered how he even slept in this thing, but it was like home. Sniper had a way of doing that; he always felt safe. That's probably why your instinct was to come here, even knowing you wouldn't be able to explain what was wrong. There was something about the way he softened around you...

"..Little one?" Sniper hesitantly broke your train of thought. He had made his way over to your side, squeezing between the bed and the wall, to place a hand on your blanked-covered shoulder. 

After a moment of thinking, he continued, "Just not in the talking mood, eh?" 

Your hand reached to cover his, both in confirmation and relief. 

"Hey, that's alright, roo. I just thought something was wrong, seein' as you're not your... babbly self." He tried to stay as coherent as possible despite his chronic lack of sleep, and thankfully, it still showed just how truly he cared for you. 

With no sign of grace or charm, Sniper climbed over you and fumbled under the sheets beside you. Gentle arms wrapped around you and a warm breath lingered on the back of your neck. Chapped lips softly pressed onto your skin, reminding you that he was there.

Minutes passed. It felt like heaven, lying beside someone who would stay up with you with no warning, without the pressure to speak even a word. You happily rocked yourself from side to side in a blissful state of tininess. Once settled, you tapped Sniper's leg with your foot. 

"Hm?" 

The vibrations of his hummed response tickled the back of your neck. You exhaled an almost silent giggle, and began to roll onto your other side to face him. You jutted forward to press a kiss on his cheek as a silent thank you. 

Sniper instantly pulled you tight against his chest. "I love ya, koala bear," came a gravely whisper, "and thanks for comin' over." 

After what seemed like a minute of silence, he mumbled again, "I'm so happy you're mine," and the two of you were finally at ease.

Thank goodness you decided to knock on his van door tonight.

#sniper x reader #tf2 x reader #agere fanfic #agere fandom #fanfic #tf2 fanfiction #team fortress 2 #sfw agere #age regression #sfw age regression #agere

[sitp-recs]

By the Grace by @letteredlettered

Harry/Draco (endgame), Harry/OMC, Draco/OMC (2020, Teen and Up, 140k)

Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.

“Everyone should get a chance to change.”

“In society,” Kavika said. “Not in your heart. You don’t have to learn to love Draco Malfoy, Harry. You don’t even have to accept the new person that he is.”

This rec has been sitting in my drafts for the longest time - I had made my peace with never posting it despite spending hours searching for a decent tree pic because I struggled so much trying to write something coherent and concise that could adequately convey just how important this story is to me. Eventually I accepted that I’d never make it justice and left it at that, until I finally interacted with Lettered for the first time this week and she mentioned that sometimes, like all of us, she also struggles with confidence. Reading that made me realize that nothing could ever be more “adequate” than just… putting my feelings out there. It doesn’t have to be perfect or particularly well-written, just real. It’s funny to realize that I’ve written so many recs at this point and yet the thought of being perceived still scares me to hell 🤡 so here’s my humble and tentative rec, self-aware and imperfect but coming from the deepest part of my heart. Special thanks to @tackytigerfic for being the best wingman and looking this over!

What to say, where to start? I haven’t felt as overwhelmed after finishing a fic since Far From The Tree and I’ve been trying to collect my thoughts about this all-encompassing fic into something (hopefully) coherent, concise and mildly adequate for months. I see now it’s impossible to find the right words but I never erased this draft and I really like that banner so here we go, inadequate, all-over-the-place kind of rec and all. BtG has changed me forever. I began reading it in early 2020 when the first chapter was published; it was the second WIP I decided to jump into after Bixgirl’s In the Dark and it was before I created the blog, which now feels like a lifetime ago. I don’t remember much besides being immediately intrigued by the unique tone and by Draco’s unusual voice, so completely different from anything I’ve read before or since, including other Lettered fics that I adore. Even through Harry’s skeptical, wary eyes, I found this aloof and earnest Draco absolutely captivating, pitiful and complex but fierce; a puzzle begging to be figured out not only by Harry, but by us, the readers. He was the first reason that made me fall in love with this fic.

The second was Harry’s journey (boy, do I love myself character-driven stories!). His introspective POV makes for such a powerful narrative voice, naturally biased and unreliable but incredibly compelling and relatable. His strength and vulnerabilities create a fascinating character who’s both inspiring and flawed, and therefore very real. It’s so wonderful to watch Draco develop over the years, both as a student and as a person, through his eyes - sometimes it feels like we’ll never grasp Draco’s true essence but that’s because we’re actually learning Harry through him, not the other way around. I found myself particularly invested in his side relationships: his commitment to teaching, the way he challenges his colleagues and superiors, the camaraderie and comfort he searches in Ron and Hermione, his achingly tender devotion to Teddy (who, by the way, is just as perfect in this fic as he’ll ever get), his growing generosity towards Draco despite not loving him back — yet.

This fic is a Drarry triumph and one of the most intimate, nuanced, sensitive and emotionally satisfying rides I’ve ever had the pleasure to experience in these 20 years of fandom. In my humble opinion this might be Lettered’s very best work - or at the very least the most challenging - among a collection of already excellent classics. The contemplative tone brings a subtle and original layer to these characters and a complex yet exciting political discussion that doesn’t take anything away from the character development, nor from the slow (and I mean, veeery slow) burn. As it should be, it takes years of therapy (and I cannot stress enough the importance given to therapy in this fic, it’s so refreshing to see!), growth and self-awareness to get to the romance. Long before being a love story, this is mostly a poignant and breathtaking tale of healing, understanding, hope and self-forgiveness. Here love is generous and resilient, and an active choice instead of something disorienting, ruining, inevitable. This love brings edification instead of tragedy, and self-forgiveness instead of redemption. It’s the love story of a lifetime, impossible to comprehend or recreate, and when you’re finished you finally realize that every little thing happened exactly the way it was supposed to be.

It took me over a year to put my thoughts into words that still don’t feel adequate or enough, but as I said before this is me trying to establish a new rapport with my reccing and this might as well be an exercise in embracing the feels and letting go of perfectionism. Dear Lettered, I know this fic was an immense challenge for you and it might not have happened the way you expected or envisioned at first. But please know that somewhere out there, at least one person still thinks daily about the line “Have I taught you, then, to want things for yourself?”, someone who found this story deeply cathartic, transformative and thought-provoking, someone who’s incredibly grateful that you decided to tell it and share with the rest of us. Thank you 💜

Read on AO3

#drarry fic rec

[animeomegas]

Hey, can I ask a favor? I’m looking for some fics.

Ok so I really really love those ‘morning after’ scenarios yk, After you did It

Just the softness, pillow talk, cuddling, laughing ugh I just really love it

So I’m asking, do you know any fics like this, or have you written them? I can’t find anything and if I do find it, it’s sub!reader and that’s just annoying.

Thank you!

Hi! I don't really know if I can think of any morning after fics, I mainly write direct aftercare stuff, but I do have a short piece that I wrote for an original character of mine that's the morning after, if that interests you?

He's an original character from a story I started making a while ago for fun, but I don't mind posting this morning after scene for you!

Here you go, hopefully this scratches the itch! @kyrrless

Matthew awoke groggily, gently being tugged from sleep and into consciousness by something he couldn’t quite place with his sleepy mind. It only took him a few moments to realise that the world’s most annoying patch of sun was shining through the curtains and directly into his eyes.

He huffed and rolled over, the duvet feeling divine against his bare skin as he buried his face into his pillow. His body ached from last night, but in a pleasant and satisfied way that was slowly coaxing him back into the land of slumber, like the satisfied ache after a good stretch.

Matthew was warm and cosy but there was one thing his mind fixated on as missing from this perfect scenario. You.

He stretched a handout to the other side of the bed to search for you, but he found only cold sheets. He abruptly sat up, blinking dizzily at the empty space of bed beside him.

Oh. He was alone.

Embarrassment and shame curled in his gut. Of course, he was alone: you were a busy person with a busy schedule, and Matthew shouldn’t be surprised to find that you couldn’t wait around for him all day, even after the attention you’d lathered on him last night.

He shivered a little and tugged the duvet up towards his naked chest to fight the chill. Mentally, he shook himself. He was behaving like a child pining for attention. He just needed to get up and ready like a normal person, like you’d obviously done.

He glanced at the clock on the bedside table. He had class in three hours anyway and he still needed to swing by his dorm to get his books.

Decision made, Matthew went to remove the duvet and stand, but the sound of the bedroom door creaking open slowly stopped him in his tracks.

“Oh!” you said, sliding into the room with a tray in hand. “You’re awake.”

Matthew blinked at you, hands fisted in his lap. You only smiled at his surprise, perhaps taking his mussed hair and bleary eyes as a sign that he wasn’t quite coherent yet.

“I know you have class later, but I went to the bakery down the road to get breakfast first,” your voice was soft, and a tension Matthew didn’t know he was holding melted away. You didn’t leave him here to go to work… you’d gone to get him breakfast. Affection burned through his chest.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Matthew said shyly, fiddling with his fingers. You lowered the tray to the foot of the bed, allowing him to see to-go cups filled with what smelt like hot chocolate and a bunch of pastries and muffins on little plates.

“I know,” you smiled, sliding up to him and cupping his face in your hands. They were cool against his heated skin. “But I wanted to.”

Matthew wasn’t sure where the desire came from, but before he knew it, he was pushing towards you, trading the cradling grip you had on his face for a more traditional embrace. And despite Matthews worries that you would push him away, you accepted the embrace with ease, the way you always did.

“You’re cold,” Mathew muttered, goosebumps covering his arms as he hugged your clothed body to his not-so-clothed one. He didn’t have it in him to feel embarrassed by his state of undress when you were holding him so securely.

“I was outside,” you said back, breath tickling his skin. “You on the other hand are delightfully warm.”

You held the embrace in silence for a few more moments before attempting to pull back, but Matthew only tightened his grip, grumbling in dissatisfaction at the move.

“What’s wrong, Matthew?” you asked with a low voice, tracing meaningless patterns on his bare back. “Is everything okay?”

Humiliatingly, tears burnt at the back of his eyes, but he furiously blinked them away. He would not cry, absolutely not. He had cried more than enough on the day he’d first met you to last forever.

“’m fine,” Matthew mumbled into your shoulder.

“Sometimes I don’t always pick up on subtle emotions and I’ve definitely hurt people by accident because of that, so please tell me if there’s something wrong,” you said earnestly, pulling away from him to see his face. “If I’ve hurt you in some way-“

“No!” Matthew denied slightly too loudly. “No, I just…”

You waited patiently for him to finish. He wasn’t used to someone valuing his words so highly, so to see you wait for him rather than speak over him almost robbed him off his words. Thankfully he managed to squeeze them out, even if his face was probably a bright pink.

“I just missed you,” he mumbled.

Your face softened and you pulled him into another hug.

“I’m right here.”

“I know.”

You stayed like that for long enough that Matthew found himself dozing against your shoulder, the hazy morning vibes having returned full forced. That was probably why he jolted so much when you suddenly gasped and pulled away.

“The food! It’s going to get cold!”

You turned and messed around with the tray while Matthew rubbed the last of the sleep from his eyes. You got so worked up over the smallest maters of comfort sometimes and it amused him greatly. He imagined you’d have a heart attack if he admitted to eating stale crisps and pickles for breakfast last week when he was running late for class.

You pushed the tray further up onto the bed, allowing space for you to slide into the space it had vacated. You looked up, mouth open like you were about to tell him something, but then you stopped and turned away, biting your lip.

Matthew blinked at the uncharacteristic bashfulness.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s ah-“ you waved a hand around in the vague direction of him, still averting your eyes, cheeks slowly turning pink. “The blanket, I think it’s, um, slipped a little.”

Matthew’s heart skipped a beat as he instinctively looked down to his lap. And sure enough, the blanket was now pooled around his upper thighs, covering nothing that it was supposed to. With a yelp, he frantically yanked the duvet upwards, suddenly feeling the need to cover every inch of his skin from view.

Small chuckles escaped your mouth as you watched him. He glared at you.

“It’s not funny, I didn’t even know and-“

You burst into full on laughter, bending forward onto the bed for support.

“Stop laughing!”

Despite his protests, Matthew found small giggles slipping out of him too.

“You’re laughing too.”

“I am not!”

“You absolutely are.”

“Just- Shut up and eat a pastry!”

(Hopefully you enjoyed! If you have any questions about Matthew or the story, I'd be happy to answer them :) )

#asks #oc #reader insert #gn reader #oc matthew bradley #original writing

[goldenteaset]

…So I finished La Salut…there were things I really wanted to enjoy but couldn’t, and things I didn’t enjoy at all (sometimes things don’t need explaining!). And then suddenly the emotions worked again and I actually cried, repeatedly! I now have even more thoughts about “divine mantles” and how various characters in Virche learn to embody or discard them…but 0 coherence. ^^;

That said, I couldn’t get into Adolphe that much. I felt for him, but it’s the same feeling as from a distant acquaintance that you see sometimes on his way to Job at Location. There's a lot of implications to him that are interesting: how he's structured his whole life around Ceres and what that means for his sanity, his horror at Relivers, etc., but the writers are so committed to him being Normal (tm) that those aren't touched on as much. This is what happens when you put Ankou and everyone else right next to him. Poor guy…his more snide faces are extremely good though. Hopefully later playthroughs will make him more endearing!

...Actually I do have more thoughts, oops. First the "aw man :(" and then the "YAAAAAY" under the cut:

The "Aw, Man :(" which isn't "bad" so much as disappointing:

Please imagine with me a version of this story where Ankou is the God/Watchman of Death he proclaims himself to be. Imagine everyone else, terrified of dying, suddenly being able to ask about the Afterlife, even if the answers are vague. (Can't have everyone get too hyped to die!) Wouldn't that have been unique and gothic-ly fun? I still like the actual answer on some level, but I wanted this too.

On that note, an actual dislike: I viscerally hate Ankou being embarrassed about acting the part of Watchman of Death. It felt born from a place of love for the Drifter, Yves and Ceres, so for him to feel so negatively toward it? Awful.

Less awful and more confusing: Ankou says he uses "smoke bombs", but none of his previous exits imply smoke. All the more reason to pretend it's only canon here!

The "Queen's genes" (ha, rhyme) thing really did amount to nothing, huh? I don't understand why it's here and that rankles.

Every time some variant of the line "Ceres is a plant/lycoris" comes up I feel like the Six-Fingered Man from The Princess Bride while Inigo Montoya does his revenge speech ad nauseam. "STOP SAYING THAT!"

Seriously though, I can handle Ceres being like a lycoris, akin to, etc. But something about "is a plant" is so inherently funny/brain-breaking that I'm no longer thinking of all this as a metaphor, but an actual, physical part of her, and it just doesn't gel. ;_;

It feels like there were two plots going on in this route: The Royal Family and Adolphe VS Ankou, and frankly I wound up more invested in the former. This isn't the first time it's happened, it won't be the last, but I still was drumming my fingers a little waiting for things to switch back.

I was really hoping the bouquet confession would lead to an option to choose Adolphe or Ankou (or both), because it felt like Adolphe was passing the baton over to Ceres in that moment. But nope! :(

Yves and Lucas' mini-endings in this route's Salvation ending were so wonderful I now have 0 desire to play their actual Salvation routes. Oops!

The "YAAAAAY", which I hope is self-explanatory:

Dahut's reveal? Literally iconic, as was the final scene between him and Salome. Loved his revenge, loved his friendship toward Nadia, loved how he unwittingly gave Lucas the hope he needed to make his first steps toward freedom, etc.

All the love interests working together to save Ceres! Also self-explanatory.

Adolphe and Ankou's banter and arguments, down to their voices being similar, was so funny and also sad post-reveal. It reminds me a lot of Archer and Shirou in F/SN's Unlimited Blade Works route, but better crafted I think. YMMV.

Capuchine KABOOM! (I find him rather morbidly cute, so his frustrated scream pre-explosion gave me both catharsis and a weird sort of cuteness aggression. Again, Scien, again!)

On a more serious note, Scien and Lucas having to interact and him being able to help Lucas on the road to recovery was really sweet. They were both great in this route.

Hugo/Yves are my OTP now, actually. That love realization from Hugo was just too good, ditto them traveling together. Please let there be scenes of their road trip in the fandisc!

The aforementioned inconsistency and embarrassment aside, Ankou being revealed as Adolphe was masterfully done. Loved the Drifter planting those stories of him in the past and then those stories helping to keep Ceres alive in the future. The images of him collapsing among the ever-growing lycorises along with the voice acting made me cry!

THE BOUQUET. All that subtle build-up over the routes (this one included) culminating in that one gorgeous CG. Ankou choosing of his own accord to take up the mantle of Watchman of Death, fulfilling that now-old fairytale and closing the cycle for good. ;v;

Hearing Lucas' voice post-ending also made me cry, but happily this time. He's alive and well! He's free! Nadia has a cane now! AAAAAA

Scien ripping up the time travel research letter. Yes. YES. I don't know how to explain it, but something about the way he's written, whether antagonistic or anti-heroic, just gives me such joy.

Ceres flustering Adolphe at the end, and their kiss. Again, I still don't quite buy their romance, but like Ankou I'm glad she's able to smile from the bottom of her heart.

...And that's it! Now to choose whose Salvation route to do first, Matthis or Scien's.

#virche evermore #shuuen no virche #virche evermore spoilers #I'm so tempted to go straight to Scien’s route…but Mathis' struggles were fascinating too... #this got long oops

[chloes-history-corner]

Post Sept 11 US

I want to start a series of posts on US in the turn of the century. I think America's invasion of Iraq describes much of the current political landscape and, at least in my experience as someone who was young and impressionable in the early 2000s, so many things about US politics was hidden from public education (unsurprisingly). For that reason, however, I think it's very useful to have ongoing discussion and evaluation of that history. Once I started doing my own research into this history, I discovered tons of information - first hand accounts, collations of reports, journalistic publications - that described a situation beyond even my cynical expectations. During the Trump "presidency," I assumed that term was the most incompetent American leadership has yet been in modern history. While I think that may still be true, an investigation of the Iraq War years reveals an administration barely more coherent, and possibly more evil. That said, my next 'x' number of posts will be concerning the Iraq War. I'll attempt to start at the beginning, and take us through the war years - hopefully providing a useful collection of historical anecdotes you can use to expand your own context and begin your own journey into this wild clusterfuck of a time. Introduction out of the way, I'll keep the content of this post short by attempting to summarize the Bush Admin's internal reaction to 9/11, and provide some cursory context of pre-9/11 sentiment.

As you can imagine, this topic will involve these three individuals (and many more) quite often. From left to right you see: Donald Rumsfeld, Bush's SecDef and general sleazebag; George W Bush, the President from 2000-2009, and completely useless for nearly all of that span; and Dick Cheyney, Vice President and former Rumsfeld protegee turned aimless war hawk.

First, some light background: The Gulf War. I want to start of by mentioning one of the many failings of my public education - essentially no mention of the Gulf War at all. You'll see why it went unmentioned as we go.

The Gulf War was born primarily out of the US' foreign policy from the Cold War. As an extremely brief summary, one of the US' primary strategies for combating Soviet interests was global resource control and manipulation. The actual tactical implementation of this broad strategy varied case-by-case, but in the Middle East, the US sought to control oil production and distribution through trade agreements, coercion, and hostile covert operations.

I could write books about the Gulf War (and many have), but in short: As part of America's Cold War operations in the Middle East, their covert operations were particularly brutal and led to very lopsided trade agreements for oil with Iran and Kuwait, and also to the arms provisioning of the Taliban who, at the time, were fighting the Soviets occupying Iraq (a conflict the US cherished). In Iran, the CIA - and the OPC in particular - essentially gave themselves an accountability-free playground. In the early '50s, an anti-imperial politician named Mohammad Mosaddegh took power in Iran and immediately nationalized Iran's oil production, effectively shutting the West off from Iranian oil completely.

The Western powers obviously couldn't tolerate what they considered to be an upstart, "Third World" nation, self-governing in a way that didn't cater to Western interests. So, the CIA quickly sent over perhaps their least competent (and most confident) intelligence operative - Kermit Roosevelt Jr. - who had successfully lobbied for an American intervention into Iranian politics; a coup of Mosaddegh's government. After several comically unsuccessful attempts (which I encourage you to read about), Kermit finally succeeded. Mosaddegh's government collapsed, and the US and Britain installed a pro-Western PM in his place, Reza Pahlavi. The new government swiftly reversed many of Mosaddegh's policies in favor of new legislation, particularly national oil legislation. The new oil deal re-privatized Iranian oil, owned partially by Iranian companies and mostly by Western oil companies (like BP, the company Mosaddegh had removed with oil nationalization). All this to say that the US (and Britain) practically through money into the Iranian shredder until the situation worked out in their favor. Considering their GDP, such massive final investiture meant virtually nothing for the Western powers, and this attitude would largely inform the West's diplomatic strategy in the Middle East going forward. Regrouping to the topic of Iraq: In 1979, Pahlavi's government was overthrown in the Iranian Revolution. Saddam Hussein, who was and had been the Iraqi President, supported this revolution because Iraq and Iran had been constantly engaged in border disputes. Saddam supposed that a revolution would weaken Iran and make it easier to achieve the territory gains he'd been attempting for years. Instead, the new Iranian government was less predictable than Saddam had hoped. The new Iranian leader quickly called for a broader Islamic Revolution, and encouraged revolutionary activity in Iraq throughout the early part of the decade. Very long story short (I highly recommend reading more on this topic) the antagonism between Iran and Iraq spill over into open military conflict, and Iraq decides to invade in September of 1980 and fought a brutal and chaotic war involving multiple Geneva violations. In the end, despite Iraqi propagandist claims, the war was extremely unrewarding for both parties. Both Iran and Iraq exited the war billions of dollars poorer with suffering domestic infrastructure and belligerent populations.

There's more to say on this in a later post, but for our immediate understanding: Saddam needed money badly after the war, and looked to the West, who had been historically supportive of his government (the West considered Iraq to be an important regional counter to the Iranian revolutionary spirit). America, however, after bankrolling Iraq during the war against Iran, was desperately attempting to distance itself from the situation and take a posture of the patriarchal mediator. This happened for a lot of reasons, but a major one being that Saudi Arabia and Israel were becoming nervous about the Middle East, and the US considered them crucial allies and would not risk disturbing them. So, left to his own devices, Saddam panicked.

Part of the reason for invading Iran was to seize Iranian oil production and boost the Iraqi economy. This wan not achieved during the invasion, but Saddam saw another opportunity. Directly to Iraq's south lies Kuwait - a small but prosperous nation, rich in oil and poor in arms. Thinking (barely) on his feet, Saddam decides to invade Kuwait in an attempt to make back his losses from his Iranian invasion by seizing and selling Kuwaiti oil.

I mentioned earlier that the US was very nervous about more conflict in the Middle East, and in the early 90s began running war games simulating a defense of Saudi Arabia from a hostile Iraq. The determination was that such a campaign would be extremely costly and very difficult to justify to the American public, and this conclusion heavily informed the H.W. Bush Administration in the year Saddam chose to invade Kuwait.

I think it's important to note the dramatic change in direct American intervention into the Middle East with H.W.'s administration. During the Cold War, the US had a more passive stance - choosing proxy wars and clandestine campaigns over direct military commitments. In the 90s however, everything seemed to change.

Saddam's invasion of Kuwait begins on August 2, 1990. The next day, President Bush Sr. was on television declaring his committed opposition to Iraq's aggression. Less than after the war in Kuwait began, American fighter squadrons have landed in Saudi Arabia, the first of many American military assets to be deployed in the conflict, and a dire foreshadowing of the beginning of the Gulf War in January '91.

My next post will focus entirely on the Gulf War, and mostly the American shift in attitude towards Saddam and the idea of direct military engagement in Middle Eastern society. Thank you for reading! Please look forward to my next post.

#us history #american history #political history #middle east #gulf war #operation iraqi freedom #desert storm

[apoptoses]

Look. Look. I wish I had a more coherent commentary to offer rn but I’m basically Armand right after Daniel tried to hold his hand. I feel like I need to run and find a place to hide from all these feelings 😮‍💨 truly beside myself. And I knew I would be and it still hit me like a ton of bricks. Chapter ONE ☝️ and you had me quietly sobbing into my pillow. I had to pause it like 3 times because it was getting a bit too overwhelming ngl. And I KNEW, and I still wasn’t prepared for it. And this!? “Sent a tingle through his whole face until he couldn’t help it, he reached up and touched the spot where Daniel’s mouth had just been” I’d been seeing this scene in my head so clearly for years (because it’s obvious that’s exactly how it happened!), and you finally 👏🏼 put it 👏🏼 into 👏🏼 words 👏🏼 one of Armand’s many Disney princess moments through the ages imo. 15/10 no notes whatsoever, the fact that this is going to be 10 chapters might actually kill me lmaoo I’m ready my lord 🙏 xoxo DA hopefully I’ll make more sense tomorrow, but for now just know what this is truly some game changing stuff ❤️‍🩹

Oh Dungeon Anon, if you think that hurts then you aren't ready for chapter 2 because I just made myself cry editing it hahaha It's been so long since I looked at the doc that I totally forgot some of what was in it and now I'm crying in the club over a topic that comes up when they're at a diner.

I am so sorry to make you cry but so happy you felt so much while reading it!!

And gosh, I just love the idea of Armand getting a cheek kiss. Like this isn't necessarily a come pull my strings fic but I do have some little role reversal call backs to those fics. Like Armand's touching his cheek there is meant to mirror Daniel when Armand kissed his cheek at the museum. Their history, to me, is built on those fics and I can't not consider it part of them when I write this post-canon type stuff.

And it's just sweet! Armand being hesitant for once, getting to sit in Daniel's lap and then not sure if he should kiss him goodnight. He loves him, he misses him, he gets to be the one pursued now! It's coming full circle for our baby ♥

I look forward to your continued reviews 🥹💖

#apoptoses answers #dungeon anon

[idontwannabreakdown]

Ready for Combat and Shadow

Okay, so last summer I did a piss poor analysis of "Ready for Combat" and then a really great analysis of "Shadow". Well, now I'm awake because of caffeine and the Thoughts™ and also I get to reward myself because I finally worked on my literature review. So, I will be attempting to make the connection between these two songs make sense because I have not been able to stop thinking about their connection since the music videos came out. Hopefully, this will be coherent

When I initially analyzed "Ready for Combat" I was operating through the lens that Ariel was talking to other people in the song. And she is. In one version. The take I had was that Ariel was fighting everyone who tried to put her down. And I still stand by that. As a woman in the music industry, she has had to fight to be herself for years. However, I now think that there is an alternative version of this song where she is not talking to some undefined Other, but rather herself. And it makes sense and I wonder why I haven't thought of it sooner when so many of Icon For Hire's songs portray themes of internal conflict. Now, the reason I make this claim is because of the connections between the two music videos I mentioned above.

The music videos for "Shadow" and "Ready for Combat" clearly exist within the same universe. The costumes, the setting, and the characters all point to this. The initial assumption I had was that Ariel has spent so long fighting other people, and now she finally has to face herself. And that is still a valid interpretation! However, taking into consideration the themes of previous Icon For Hire songs, specifically "Shadow", is it too far-fetched to claim that the man Ariel is fighting in the "Ready For Combat" music video is some sort of personification of Ariel's repressed emotions? Think of the contrast! He wears white while she wears black. He is fully covered by his clothing, while Ariel is more exposed. He is not the shadow self. No, that is Ariel in the red dress. Yet he is some sort of internal barrier. He is a conglomeration of all the negative voices that Ariel has internalized. He is all the reasons why Ariel has not yet faced her shadow self. Once Ariel gets past the negative self-talk, she is finally ready to sit with herself and be gentle with the shadow, something that is crucial for inner healing.

At the beginning of the "Shadow" music video, we see Ariel sitting alone in the locker room and a dark mass emits itself from one of the lockers. The symbolism there is obvious enough. The dark mass is her shadow self which she had literally locked away. And, she is in the "Ready for Combat" costume. I did a more in-depth analysis of this costume in my "Shadow" Costumes post which can be found in my pinned post at the top of my blog. Yet, for the sake of clarity, I will summarize it here. Ariel is restraining herself in several ways, through the bonds in her hair and tight-fitting jewelry. She is trying to cover herself, while still exposing the softest parts of herself and the colors represent strength, victory, and hidden power. Now, as we move into the main costume of this music video, we learn that these bonds aren't really attached to anything. Her arms and chest are bound by black fabric, but they are not tethered to anything. These are internal bonds that Ariel has made to suppress the darkest parts of herself. As noted in my Costumes post, the color red is often associated with rage and aggression. The tone of "Ready for Combat" is that of anger and rage. Even in the song itself, Ariel notes that she has been suppressing her rage in the way that she lets other people walk over her.

Another reason I think the physical fight that is taking place in "Ready for Combat" is symbolic of an internal struggle is because of the line "I'm gonna drag my shadow into the light" in " "Shadow" being paired with the entrance of the SWAT team into the locker room. At that moment, after the bridge of "Shadow", Ariel's subconscious self is being illuminated by outside factors. In short, the SWAT team is the factor that forces Ariel to face her shadow self. In this sense, "Ready for Combat" takes place inside Ariel's conscious mind, while "Shadow" takes place inside her subconscious.

Please add thoughts!!! Whenever I make long posts like this I am always hoping to start a conversation!

#icon for hire #ariel bloomer #icon for hire band #shawn jump #icon army #the reckoning #icon for hire the reckoning #icon for hire ready for combat #icon for hire shadow #ready for combat #shadow

[y2kuromi]

✶ : ❛ 𝗦𝗨𝗕𝗨𝗥𝗕𝗔𝗡 𝗟𝗘𝗚𝗘𝗡𝗗𝗦 : rin itoshi x reader ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

˖ ִֶָ𐀔 contents : angst , fluff, fem! reader (can be read as gn! hopefully).post argument.established relationship. second person (you/your/yours) and third person pov. profanities w/c: 1.4k

if you'd told rin itoshi he would be standing outside your house pleading desperately to be let in — voluntarily — in the cold he would've called you a crazy idiot. or probably something worse. but here he was doing just that. wringing his hands nervously in the woollen cavern of his gloves as he stood on your porch, chilling wind freezing his cheeks and snowflakes tangling in hair and sticking to his long eyelashes

he contemplated leaving. he pondered trudging back home in the still falling snow, with a still broken heart and his pride intact. but he couldn't bring himself to walk through the darkening night. so he stayed.

if he persisted you would forgive him..hopefully. he knew he didn't deserve that. he could barely remember what you'd even argued about in the first place. he just knew he'd crossed a line.

you hadn't spoken to him in three days. and he hadn't tried to contact you. he'd felt tortured by guilt and now all he wanted was for the silent treatment to stop. he was waving the white flag. the way he should've, instead of sharpening his words and wounding you with them

rin was sorry he'd said those things...such awful things. he was a terrible person and you deserved so much better than him. hell, he couldn't even apologise properly. the words would lodge in his throat choking off his every attempt at a coherent apology. they stuck like drywall, refusing to fall from his lips. he felt so sick. so fucking, awfully, nauseatingly sick.

he had no one to blame but himself. for being lukewarm when it came to loving you. you deserved so much more than he could give you.

rin's teal eyes shot open in surprise as he heard the faint clicking of a key. he blinked owlishly at you, pinching himself to see if he was dreaming.

he wasn't. you were standing right in front of him holding the door open, wearing an oversized sweatshirt and basketball shorts. his sweatshirt. his shorts. he wanted to believe you were still his

"why are you here?" you asked, your eyes were glued to the floor as if the carpet was the most intriguing thing in the world

"i wanted to..." he trailed off then he tried again, "i wanted to talk"

"so talk then, as far as i'm concerned you have nothing to say" you said coldly. your words cut through him like shards of ice. he could feel your hurt, your anger prickling his soul

"can i come in?" he knew he was asking for too much, "please"

much to his surprise, you wordlessly opened the door wider and stepped aside for him to come in.

he didn't miss the way you tensed up as he passed you. nor did he miss the wary look that fleeted across your face. watching you tiptoe around him on egg shells twisted the shards further in his chest.

his fingers curled into fists as he followed you into your home. there was a heavy silence, drenched in unspoken words. he wanted to say something, anything. he wanted to tell you how sorry he was, how much he cared, that he still loved you. even though he had ruined everything between the two of you.

instead, he settled down on your couch, folding his arms over his lap. you sat down across the room, as far away from him as possible. you were staring resolutely out of the window, your fingers absentmindedly picking at the hem of your sweatshirt.

"are you even going to say anything?" you finally asked impatiently, "you owe me an apology rin"

"i know" he nodded, "it's just..." you could see the wheels spinning in his head, "my mind is blank, i don't know what to say" he looked at you pleadingly and your expression softened slightly

"just try" you coaxed, "take your time if you need to" he knew he didn't deserve your kindness. you should be hurling insults and profanities at him. he'd hidden away for three days. seventy-two whole and complete hours. yet you still had the patience of a saint

"i love you (y/n)," he blurted. the words left him like a bullet leaving a gun barrel. ricocheting in his mouth until he realized just what he'd said. it wasn't an apology. it was the only thing he knew

he doesn't want you to say it back. he doesn't deserve it. not yet. he wanted you to reassure him that the two of you would still be okay.

"i don't want to break up" he confessed, feeling utterly crushed by the weight of his words. vulnerability used to be a foreign concept to rin. now he was reduced to babbling like a pathetic, lost fool at the mercy of his feelings

"we can't continue this" you stated plainly.

"what do you mean?" he could feel his heart stopping. any second now, you'd tell him it was over. he hadn't ever felt so helpless. so hopeless. so scared before. he refused to meet your gaze. if he did he knew he would cry. rin never cried.

"this endless cycle is driving me crazy rin" you sighed, "one minute you love me and the next i mean nothing to you, just make up your mind"

"i'm sorry" he breathes, and it's merely a whisper, "for saying you meant nothing to me. it's not true, not even close. i need you. i really do. so much more than you know. i know i need to show it more, i'll do better, i'll be better, i promise. just please don't leave me...you're the best thing that's ever happened to me"

his words crashed together and were barely comprehensible .you didn't respond right away. you were processing it all, trying to process everything he'd said.

he heard the soft intake of your breath as your eyes watered. he didn't want to think you were on the verge of tears because of him. he couldn't tell if they were sad or happy tears..

you looked at him hesitantly, and after several moments, shuffled over to stand in front of him. you placed the back of your hand against his cheek. "you're freezing" you whispered, your soft tone was laced with concern. "it was cold outside" rin murmured, leaning into your touch despite the numbing guilt that radiated throughout his entire body. your thumb moved gently across the side of his face. your touch grounded him, it held him together.

your eyes were so warm. they shone like embers. his own eyes closed in relief as you leaned in closer, enveloping him completely in a hug. it took three painstakingly long days. seventy-two awful hours, but rin was back in your arms again, where he belonged.

he melted into you, drowning in the scent of ocha and honey. he clung to you as if he was scared to let go and his cold hands clutched at the warmth that radiated from your skin. he was so impossibly close you could feel his eyelashes fluttering against your cheeks.

rin watched your face for signs of lingering pain, but found none. your face was completely free of wrinkles and creases, your skin was smooth and unlined, untouched except by the light of the coffee table lamp dusting your cheeks. and your smile was the same, small and fragile but still sweet and beautiful

"we're......we're okay right?" he asked. he felt your lips ghost across his cheek in a tender kiss

"'course we are" you assured, carding your fingers softly through his tangled hair. you kissed him tenderly on the corner of his mouth. then the other. your kisses were feather light but filled with meaning. they spoke of forgiveness. he could taste it on your lips.

rin's arm encircled your waist and squeezed lightly as if he feared you might disappear if he let go. he pressed an unapologetic kiss to your lips. he kissed you as if he was trying to etch the shape of them, the shape of you, indelibly into his memory, to commit it to his heart forever. he didn't want to let go.

much to rin's displeasure, you pulled back and looked at him. really looked at him. his long lashes, his magnetic teal eyes, his freshly kissed lips and the faint blush tinting his cheeks. you looped your fingers through his before saying the words he so desperately wanted to hear

"i love you too rin, i'd never leave you"

© Y2KUROMI ‘23 please do not plagiarise, repost, or translate any of my works on here or any other websites.

#𓂃˖ letters from: rin #ִֶָ 𓂃˖ mimi writes?! #rin x y/n #itoshi rin x reader #rin x reader #rin x you #rin itoshi #bllk fluff #bllk x you #bllk x reader

[gatzbright]

3 4 & 11 🫶🫶

BELLA hi !! :D ♥️🫂

3. Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic

oooo ok okay. for fics usually like half the time it honestly starts with a title, because recently that will come from a song that has inspired the vibe or story i wanna write. i love pretty lyrics and they just jump out at me straight away and i'm like THAT NEEDS TO BE A FIC TITLE. then i start writing but a lot of the time i write random scenes that come way later bc i am impatient in my writing, but also entirely all over the place, and i just have scenes come to me in full force and i have to get them down. this is also not helpful when i have a 5k doc and only like 1k of actual coherent and Chronological fic. but yeah it gets written in the end after much chaos (hopefully. i mourn my fic graveyard on the daily ... shout out to australia fic. goodbye goodbye goodbye u were bigger than the whole sky and u will be missed). my attention span is also nonexistent on a bad day (adhd is so fun) and i will repeatedly find myself zoned out and staring at a wall. but then there's good days and i DO write :D i very much have to be in the mood to write too, and i am also a slow writer, but each to their own ya know! we are all writers n people and we are all different, and that's what makes life so fun. don't be hard on yourself guys bc u have ur own way of doing things and u ROCK (trying to convince myself that slow writing is fine. we will get there. whew). then comes posting time and i both love and loathe doing tags lmao. i love writing the free random tags but then remembering what people may Actually search to come across my fic is hard and annoying pft and i usually just get my previous fics up and look at their tags or the ones for other fics i know are similar. summaries and formatting and links also suck so bad. my god. i usually copy paste all of it over from my previous fic again and change where necessary. but yeah that is it and then i hopefully have a coherent and fun fic to post :D

4. Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

i answered this one in the post before this so if anyone wants to read it is there :)

5. Link your three favorite fics right now

OOOOOO MY GOSH. YES. love this lets go (heads to my email to zero in on the fics i Know made me sob endlessly). house of gold (rated m) by tippysleeps is one of the most beautiful and heart wrenching fics i have read lately, if ever, and i sobbed at the end very hard into my pillow and made it extremely damp. this is so pos please read it i am yelling. it's like george moves to florida n then lots of domestic slice of life moments almost vignette style but still so in depth, and it reached into my chest and squeezed my heart n slotted right in next to it and there it shall stay. tippysleeps is a genius everyone needs to read his fics go go go. asystole (rated e; no minors) by womanhunt is incredible and i also cried while reading this fic (shoutout to bella !!!). dream and george go to london and george is experiencing being back there for the first time since his move, all alongside seeing dream in the city he grew up in. it's fluffy established relationship, while also making ur heart ache, alongside some flashbacks that i adored, and entirely full of love—it is love and dnf captured in a few thousand words. instigate the paradigm by nervouswaltz (also rated e; minors don't interact) i loved this fic so much it tore me to pieces when i read it. bird is such an incredible writer (ily birdy) who's words are always so visceral and he ties love and life and the experience of being human all together into every fic he writes. this one is a bodyswap fic and i think it's a very important read to make u think n see yourself from another persons eyes, and is all about learning to love yourself. it's so beautiful guys :( buh. please check out birds fics !!!

#THANK U BELLA !!! :) another rambled answer LMAO that was also fun once again #there's literally so many more fics i could mention. go into this tag on my blog to see some of my favs -> #favourite writers! #side note some of that first question is me getting heavily irritated at myself rn for still not having finished my folkmore fic #i am insisting answering these is productive tho bc they are so fun and make me think a lot about my writing & i love that !! #folkmore is coming. i will go back to write it now. we got this amy u got this #sighs heavily #asks #writing talk