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#demisexual
aroaceconfessions · 2 days ago
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Vent: I'm feel like I can't belong in the lgbt community. At this point maybe I don't even want to, because of the startling amounts of aphobia and aroace "discourse" some of the other lgbt identities stir up, especially toward demis like myself. I don't get it. I thought the community was supposed to be about inclusivity.
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nyanbinary-trender · a day ago
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- CANON LGBTQ+ CAST: BUTTERFLY SOUP (Akarsha, Chryssa, Diya, Liz, Min-seo, Noelle) 
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monstersandmaw · 11 hours ago
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I hope this isn't too personal and I don't offend you (with the question or the wording, english is not my native language) with it, but I would really like to ask you something since I don't really have any ace friends to compare experiences with. But it's totally up to you to answer! I figured I'm ace for about two years now but I still constantly get those days where I question myself and weather I'm really really ace, since I still kinda would like a relationship and raise kids (I know that doesn't necessarily make me not ace but I can't help but doubt). Does this ever get better if this compares to your experience? Especially if the people around you keep asking about your future and their expectations for your life. I feel like this is the hardest part of it, dealing with those expectations. Has this been the same for you and do you have a suggestion to deal with this?
Oof, Anon, I feel you. And I never mind asks like this. I'm not sure I have the answer you're looking for, but I can very happily tell you my experiences, so you can see how it's all super complex and nuanced, and know that you're not alone!
One thing I find helpful is reminding myself that 'ace' is just a label, and that you don't have to define yourself completely around everything that one label may encompass. You don't have to be entirely disinterested in all things sex-related to say you're ace.
You can also be romantically interested in someone, but not sexually interested. That's totally a thing, and it's totally fine.
If I wanted to pick up all the labels that may apply to me, I'd say that I'm: "panromantic and grey- and demi-sexual". But that's a bit of a mouthful, and it doesn't really address all the nuances that make up my sexuality. And that's fine! You don't have to define yourself down to the last atom, and then stick with it.
It's not a 'one label only per person' thing. For me, I'm fairly sex positive. I'm ok with it, and it's not unpleasant, and I genuinely enjoy being close to and intimate with my husband, but I just... don't actively want it for myself.
You can be ace but still want children.
You can be ace but still want a romantic relationship.
You can be ace but still want physical intimacy.
You can be ace but ok with sex.
You can be ace and still want some aspects of sexual intimacy and not others.
You can be ace and get aroused during sex.
You can be horny and still be ace.
You can be you, and want all the things you want, and still be ace.
And you can have a lot of the characteristics of being ace, without necessarily sticking to everything that falls under the umbrella of 'asexuality'. It's nuanced and delicate, and that's ok.
Labels are useful, but you don't have to stick with it completely forever.
I can't speak for everyone's experiences on the ace-spectrum, obviously, so if anyone has anything positive to add to this in the notes, please feel free! It's all so personal and nuanced, but any support Anon can get would be great!
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elliothassomethoughts · 2 days ago
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Demisexuals, help a girl out!
I’m in my twenties. It feels like I should know this by now. But I don’t. I don’t know if I’m perhaps demisexual?
In the recent year I have reflected more and more on the fact that I don’t seem to experience sexual attraction in the same way as my friends. It’s not that I never feel sexual attraction, it’s just different. I mean, I have always kind of known that I’m bi, but at the same time I’m almost never attracted to anyone, no matter the gender. Never in my life have I met a stranger and been sexually attracted to them. I’ve only ever been in one relationship in my life, and then I felt sexual attraction - but I mean, I was in love with her!And I think I felt romantic attraction before I felt any sexual attraction. But I’m so rarely in love that it’s difficult for me to tell if that’s always the case!
I’ve had one night stands, though. I have dated and had sex with people I don’t really know. But I’ve still never felt sexual attraction? I have never actually enjoyed that sex. I’ve just had it because other person wanted to, and it felt expected of me. So, the only time I’ve actually enjoyed sex, was in my only romantic relationship. But then, there’s also masturbation. Which I do. So, I don’t know where that leaves me.
And then there’s the question of celebrity crushes. Because I’ve had them. And then I’ve felt sexual attraction (and so, i have never even pondered the idea of being demi before). But, this attraction hasn’t been based on that these celebrities are “hot” or something like that. I’ve mainly had crushes on actors (and book characters!) that play parts that I kinda fall in love with a little bit.
So. I don’t know. Am I demisexual or do I just happen to not feel very much sexual attraction? Any demisexuals that have similar experiences? Or other experiences? Am I just generally confused? I’d be soooo grateful for answers!
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babblebunny · 11 months ago
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I’m calling this segment
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* Just Ace Things *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
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yellowfang89 · 5 months ago
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Asexual labels explained using cereal
You are in a kitchen, opening a pantry door. It contains every brand of cereal in existence.
Libido- How hungry you are
Sexual Attraction- How appealing each cereal is to you
Sex-Repulsed- The mere act of eating cereal disturbs you. You flee the kitchen to watch Netflix instead.
Sex-Indifferent- Someone brings you a bowl of cereal. Even though you don’t crave cereal, you decide to eat some anyway. Maybe because you want the person to feel happy you’re eating something they provided you. Maybe you’re just that hungry. Regardless, you’re fine with eating it since it’s already there. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t care either.
Sex-favorable- Though you don’t particularly crave cereal, the act of eating cereal is enjoyable. So enjoyable, you go through the trouble of picking a brand to eat.
Asexual with low/no libido- You are rarely hungry, and none of the cereal appeals to you.
Asexual with average/high libido- You are often hungry, but none of the cereal appeals to you.
Aegosexual-  Eating cereal sounds fun in theory but not in practice. You certainly have no interest in eating cereal yourself. You’d rather fantasize about other people eating cereal, thankyouverymuch. 
Gray Asexual- You only like Lucky Charms and Apple Jacks. And maybe Fruity Pebbles but you’re not quite sure.
Demisexual- You see a box of Trix. You are familiar with the rabbit on the box, due to the commercials you’ve seen. You always sympathized with the rabbit for never getting any Trix. There are things in life you’ve wanted but have never gotten. You feel a bond with the rabbit. Suddenly that box of Trix looks tasty.
Fraysexual- You see a box of Cocoa Puffs. You have never heard of Cocoa Puffs in your life. But something about it is oh-so-appealing. You pour yourself a bowl. As you start to eat, you catch a commercial for Cocoa Puffs on TV. You now know what the mascot on the box is like. You lose interest in Cocoa Puffs for reasons you cannot explain.
Lithosexual- You notice a box of Fruit Loops. You feel an urge to eat it. Toucan Sam comes to life and asks you to eat them. This makes you uncomfortable, so you leave to watch Netflix with the sex-repulsed ace.
Reciprosexual- You have no interest in any of the cereal. Not even that box of Frosted Flakes. But Tony the Tiger shows up wanting you to eat the Frosted Flakes. Now that he wants you to eat Frosted Flakes, you want to eat Frosted Flakes. 
Cupiosexual- You want to eat cereal, but none of the cereal looks appealing. Maybe if you grab that box of Corn Flakes, it’ll become appealing to you later? It’s happened to other people. You consider grabbing that box of Corn Flakes, just in case.
Orchidsexual- Some of the cereal looks appealing, but you have no interest in eating cereal.
Aceflux- None of the cereal looks good, so you close the pantry. A few days later, you decide to open the pantry again. Now, some of those brands look appetizing. You check the pantry again the next day. None of the cereal looks good anymore.
Quoisexual- You have no idea if you like a cereal because you want to eat it, or if you just think the box art is pretty. Does liking the box art count as wanting to eat it? Do you just like the mascot? Does liking the mascot count as wanting to eat the cereal? After reading everything I’ve written, you are still confused. You bang your head against the pantry in frustration.
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netoey · 5 months ago
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Isoport you <3
this really dumb pun won’t leave my head and I haven't done anything for pride yet so here we are :)
Edit: Finally noticed that the pink and blue on the trans one were the wrong way around ^^’ thanks for pointing that out, I’ve fixed it.
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floppythepuffin · 9 months ago
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https://uquiz.com/quiz/8hL5Xi/what-problematic-queer-trope-would-you-be
here have a uquiz uwu
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bearlyfunctioning · 5 months ago
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Comic #261: - Growing up Ace - Website links: here!   Being pride month I wanted to dig a little deeper into what it was like growing up Asexual, too many people gatekeep and suggest that an absence of something doesn't qualify as queer.  I was definitely treated as abnormal or broken by well meaning friends & strangers alike.
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twotrenchcoatsinaguy · a month ago
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ppl will say "demisexual and demiromantic apply to literally everyone why is it a label" and then play smash or pass, see people on the street and comment to their friends how attractive they are, meet someone at a bar and ask them on a date, start talking to someone in the hopes that it will end up sexual/romantic one day
like bro. an actual lack of attraction until a serious connection has formed is not the same thing as wanting to get to know someone before you have sex or date them.
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faunthefaery · a month ago
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TERF Spotting 101: The Bio
This topic will be triggering to some transgender and nonbinary individuals, please do not read if you do not feel like you are able to. If you can read this, please do.
Disclaimer: This is meant to be used as a way to be able to keep yourself safe, do not go witch-hunting for TERFs because they aren't worth it, this is meant to make it easier to know who to block.
Common Words Used In Bios
TERF (obviously but still putting it here)
SWERF (they are always interconnected)
♀️(the Venus sign, which to them is considered the female sign, this is not enough proof in itself)
Radfem/Radical Feminist/Radical Feminism
Gender Critical/Gender Critic
Rad/Radical (sometimes a play on words, or just alone)
XX (a reference to female people having two X chromosomes)
Rad Leaning
TradFem (associated with 1950s gender roles which is not inclusive of transgender people or people who break the binary)
FebFem (radical feminist term to describe bisexual women who exclusively date "females")
Gyn (radical feminist term for women, used because afab people need to go to gynecologists)
Gender-Free (not in a nonbinary way, but in a way that reduces people to their sex.)
Anti-Prostitution (this is another way to say Anti-Sex Work, another hallmark of someone being a TERF is hating sex workers, for some reason, aka SWERFs)
LGB (purposefully does not use the T)
Drop the T
Biological Woman
Woman (no pronouns - use discretion with this however some people may not know to add pronouns)
Male exclusionary
No males allowed
"Males DNI"
Actual Woman
Pro-Misandry
"I will not expose you for following me" (considered a TERF code of conduct)
"Woman is not a feeling."
"Same-Sex attraction"
Gender abolistionist (not in a nonbinary way, but in a way that reduces people to their sex.)
Womyn/Womxn (used to disassociate with men, however also used to include all AFAB people no matter their identity ie Transmen and Nonbinary people)
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Our article featuring older aces (aces over age 35) is on our site! Read here: https://taaap.org/2021/10/26/ace-week-21-older-aces/ 
As a lot of asexual community building and organizing happens online, it can sometimes feel difficult to find aces who aren’t Gen Z or millennials. Without an image of older asexuality, younger aces may feel lost, and people outside the community wrongly stereotype our identity as a trendy thing for youth. But older aces are out there, and deserve to be seen and heard! Thank you to all who contributed to this article. 
[ID: Two graphics with quotes from the linked article and the heading “”Older Aces”. The quotes are: “ I feel like my very existence can sometimes help shut down exclu’s and haters. If I see a validity fight in progress on Twitter, I can just step in and say, “I’m a 51-yr-old, never-partnered virgin. Care to argue with me whether asexuality exists?” - Camilla. “So many mainstream articles paint asexuality as a thing exclusive to White women in their 20s, and because of that I feel like it’s easier to write off the existence of older aces.” - Bob O’Boyle. “There’s a big ace future out there for all of us.” - Cody.
“I grew up in a time when it was not safe to be LBGTQ so when I wear the rainbow I have a tendency to watch my back.” - Joshua Godfrey. “I grew up asexual in a vacuum. There was no internet to influence or guide me. I just went my own way because it was all I knew how to do.“ - Camilla. “Now, I see my age as a bonus. I get to assume a mentor role, and educator role. And that suits me. I get to be what I didn’t have when I was young.“ - Cody. End ID.]
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