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consumeconstantly · 4 years

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Small Buff Girl Sightings ch. 3

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Marinette wonders when she got used to the crushing weight of expectations that had been imposed upon her by the Powers That Be. She also wonders when she got used to being lonely. These are two separate events, she’s fairly sure, but it isn’t like she keeps a diary anymore. She has long since fallen out of that habit, because she doesn’t want another Sabrina incident. With the class the way it is now, she can’t even fathom how much damage her diary could bring to her classmates, and likely, the whole of Paris. Because for some reason, Hawkmoth has some sort of a vendetta against her class.

Which is the whole reason why she didn’t transfer out of Mademoiselle Bustier’s class in the first place. Sure, she tried for the first few months to expose Lila and get things back to the status quo, but Marinette can only try and fail so many times before getting tired of her classmate’s willful ignorance. Then, she stayed in class for Adrien. Such a sweet, misguided boy. Marinette wonders how he would have turned out if his father was less of an asshole, or if his mother were still around. No use crying over spilled milk; she still feels bad for him, but she’s no longer staying in class for him. Her crush on Adrien is a thing of the past.

As it is currently, Mlle. Bustier’s class simply provides the most excellent cover for all of her escapades and an excellent vantage point to see what the next akuma might be.

After all, their class encompasses both the people who are most often akumatized-- minus Monsieur Ramier and Augustine-- and the people who are most likely to cause somebody’s akumatization. These are the usual suspects:

Chloe, who has admittedly improved her attitude after reconciling with her mother, but still doesn’t know how to deal with people like an ordinary person would.

Lila, whose lies and half truths have ended more than one person’s dreams (as well as her own penchant to get akumatized willingly, but that hasn’t happened often after the first year, and Marinette doesn’t really want to go into that).

Adrien, who never intends to get anybody akumatized, but ends up doing so when the media catches him doing anything. Because everything he does gets covered by the media heavily. So when he goes out with friends and is mistaken for having a lover, there are a lot of angry fangirls who get akumatized.

Oh, and then there’s Marinette herself. She’s honestly not sure how or why so many people around her end up getting akumatized-- maybe she takes other people’s luck in exchange for having an abundance of her own-- but there’s certainly quite a number.

And if she’s talking about family relations, this class takes the cake too. Adrien’s father lashes out at his employees so often that Marinette is surprised that all his workers haven’t quit yet. Gabriel’s attitude has also convinced Marinette that she never wants to work at the man’s self-named brand. Mayor Bourgois and Audrey Bourgeois are both… frightening in their own ways. Both can end careers easily, but Audrey definitely goes about ending careers in a more harmful way. Juleka’s mom pisses off anybody who tries to come down the Seine; numerous akumas have appeared in response to her loud music blasting at all times of the day. And Ivan’s parents? Sweethearts, but both are so sensitive that their family is a prime target for Hawkmoth.

She wonders when the new boy, Damian, will get akumatized. She doesn’t think-- hopes-- that he won’t, but with the track rate of their classmates, it was highly unlikely that he wouldn’t. So far, Marinette and Adrien have been the only ones in the class who haven’t been, including the series of brief transfers to their classes last year. Maybe he’ll be another to add to their number. And Marinette and Adrien both moonlight as superheroes. There’s probably some Miraculous magic involved, but Marinette’s not entirely sure. Master Fu doesn’t have answers for many of the questions that Marinette asks.

Damian seems like a decent person with a good head on his shoulders. Marinette hopes that he transfers away from this class soon, because she would feel awful if he does end up getting caught up with her classmate’s delusional version of reality. Because even though Lila has calmed down a lot and no longer tells such outlandish tales as she did in her first year at Francois Dupont, everyone else still follows her so mindlessly that it isn’t a healthy relationship for anyone involved. Marinette is almost certain that there are multiple people in the class that must know Lila was lying but now perpetuate this twisted version of reality because they’re afraid. Ninth and tenth year were important; if Lila really did lie about all of her connections, that means they messed their own futures up and need to work on themselves to fix it--something that is difficult to admit and commit to matter what age a person is. To admit that they did something wrong and take steps to fix it-- Marinette doesn’t think any of her classmates have that kind of mindset. After all, if anyone else had guts, there’s no way that Chloe would have been class president for as long as she was.

Lunch comes around quickly, and Damian manages to catch her on her way out, grabbing and holding her forearm. Marinette is cautious, making sure that none of Lila’s lackeys are around. Despite her agreement with Lila, her classmates tend to make everything a much bigger deal than it should be, and they always tell Lila whenever Marinette steps so much as a foot out of line. Lila doesn’t always act on her classmates' words, but when there are too many voices that say that Marinette is doing something wrong, Lila has to act; if she doesn’t, she’s at risk of losing her position of power. Once Marinette is sure there is no one from Mlle. Bustier’s class watching, she pulls Damian with her to an alleyway a short ways away from her family’s bakery.

“I’m telling you again. You really don’t want to be seen with me.”

“If you think I care about Lila, you’re mistaken. I will be seen with who I want to be seen with.”

Marinette’s hand is warm and calloused. Her fingertips are extra soft, like she takes care to moisturize them more than the rest of her hand.

The alleyway is surprisingly nice. Much nicer than any alleyway that Damian would find in Gotham, that’s for certain. It doesn’t have any blood stains and there are no crazy psychos hiding in the shadows. Instead, sunlight is let through the shorter of the two buildings, only five stories. Sure, the place smells slightly of urine and trash and there’s broken bottles everywhere, but that is par for the course for any major city.

Marinette’s not sure why Damian seems to be going out of his way to talk to her. She’s seen him interact with the other students, and he was positively stoic with them. His words are still clipped when he’s talking to her, but at least he speaks full sentences.

“It’ll be bad for your social health if you keep trying to talk to me.”

He raises an eyebrow. “I don’t believe I ever asked for you to look after my social health, and I certainly don’t want to talk to the idiots in that class.”

“I don’t think you understand, Damian. You might not mind being alone, but being lonely is different. It feels bad, and Hawkmoth will take advantage of you.” Marinette knows what being lonely is like, because despite her loving parents and all of her friends that she’s made outside of school in the past two years, before that, her world was limited. Sometimes, she wishes that some magical being came with Miraculous. Someone that she can actually talk to about all of her problems, both hero-related and those in her everyday life. As it is, Marinette never talks about what she does as Ladybug, unless she’s referring to herself in the third person and is forced to. Marinette doesn’t need people trying to figure out she is Ladybug, and despite Master Fu’s assurances that people without a Miraculous will never, ever catch on, she prefers to err on the side of caution. And as Ladybug, she only ever talks to Chat Noir, never deigning to talk about her personal life because it will be way too easy for Adrien to make the jump between her everyday problems and Marinette, because Adrien is a Miraculous user, and the Identity Concealment magic supposedly is less effective between Miraculous users.

“I don’t believe we’ve interacted enough for you to judge my mental fortitude. Besides, you might have told me to avoid you, but I never agreed.”

The former part of Damian’s statement isn’t true, but Damian doesn’t know that. As a superhero, Marinette needs to know how to judge people quickly and effectively. She’s read plenty of books on psychology and body language, clocked endless hours of videos on the subject. There’s also the matter of her bountiful personal experience, what with figuring out the issues of the ever increasing number of akumas that pop up around the city. Still, it isn’t like Marinette can actively refute his statement.

For a while, the two of them stand in contemplative silence.

“Fine, then, I’ll tell you why you need to avoid me. We might as well get out of this alleyway, though.” Marinette eyes the dumpster that stands a few meters away from them.

“And here I thought you were fond of alleyways,” Damian says, in reference to the first time they met.

She laughs, and it feels good. Marinette hasn't laughed in quite some time. Lately, her parents are always busy. They want to expand their patissiere by opening a second branch. That means they don’t have much family time, and when they do, it’s typically spent talking shop. Manon has continued in her bratty toddler stage, and the rest of the kids that she babysits are in a similar state. Uncle Jagged and Aunt Penny are still touring, bringing Luka around for the ride, Kagami’s currently in intensive training for the World Cup, and she simply hasn’t had enough time to see any of her other friends.

“I’d like to think that I'm more fond of my parents' macarons, than I am of alleyways.” Marinette leads him through the other end of the alleyway and through a few streets to get to the back entrance that leads directly to their house instead of the bakery. At least since Maman and Papa are so busy with business, she never needs to talk about her friends in school, or lack thereof.

“Let me get this straight,” Damian says, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You had four transfers last year and each of them ended up as akumas multiple times because of her lies, students who don’t believe her get expelled, suspended, or bullied, and the teacher and school refuse to do anything about it?”

“Well, Principal Damocles refuses to do anything; Mlle. Bustier believes her.” Marinette sips the cup of hot cocoa she prepared and lounges on her chaise. She doesn’t bother saying that all the transfers occurred in a six month period, after which Lila let up on her tyranny and turned into an average albeit still incredibly charismatic teen. Neither does she bother mentioning that Lila doesn’t lie anymore-- at least, not any big ones-- and has stopped getting herself willingly akumatized. She’s trying to get Damian to transfer out, after all.

“That’s even worse. They’re useless.”

“It depends on your point of view. They’re very useful if you’re Lila or the rest of the class.”

Damian swivels the chair so he’s facing Marinette in her entirety. “How have you managed three years with that orange demon? Better question, why have you not transferred?”

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” It’s not like Marinette can tell him the real reason why she’s staying in the class. That’s why she hasn’t told her parents about all of this. If they knew, they would definitely make her transfer classes, if not schools.

“That is no good reason for me to continue to stay with her group. I hate lying manipulators.” Damian’s mother is a good example.

“You might hate them, but if you can’t beat them and you can’t leave, you have to join them, or at least make a truce. And there’s no way Lila is going to give you up.”

“I really should just transfer.”

“I agree whole-heartedly. Please do.”

“But I can’t. My father won’t arrange a transfer for me. He wants me in that class.” More accurately-- Damian knows how many akumas came out of that class, and there is no way that he’s going to transfer away from it. It’s easier to figure out a game plan if he’s able to watch the action.

“I could arrange a transfer for you, if you want.”

“No, that’s too much trouble.”

“It’s no trouble, and if it helps one person by preventing them from getting akumatized, that’s great.”

“Why can’t you just expose her?” Damian counters.

“Tried that two years ago. Failed. Miserably. I almost got expelled.” She tactfully leaves out the fact that Lila also got her back in school. After years of making up excuses for where she’s been when an akuma attack calls her away, she’s gotten very skillful at lies by omission. Besides, if they’re to help someone, that’s okay, right?

“If you can’t expose her then how are you going to get me transferred out?”

“Those are two separate issues. I might not be able to persuade a classroom that’s very interdependent on their relations with each other, but I was class president for two years, so I know people.”

Damian decides to revise his tactics. “I don’t back down from a challenge. Besides, I want to see her empire crumble.”

The last part isn’t true. He cares little for the Italian girl, even less for their other classmates. People like Lila are alarmingly common when you run in the circles of the rich and powerful, and there are certainly people whose charisma is infinitely more dangerous. Lex Luthor, for instance. He shakes off thoughts of the dangerous business man. Damian needs to stay in this class because it’s the best lead that he’s got right now. He’s trying to be as covert as possible, under League request. Apparently, the Justice League of America isn’t supposed to interfere with what’s going on in Europe unless they call in for help. Damian thinks that’s a stupid rule-- in the end, they’re all just trying to protect the world-- but he agreed to secrecy and keeping his head down when accepting the mission. That means he’s not suddenly going to start asking his classmates about akumas unless they’re brought up in conversation. Unnecessary suspicion is a bad thing in this instance.

He takes another bite of the pastry that Marinette brought up for him. It’s much better than a lot of the other vegan options he’s found in Paris-- not that there are many to begin with. Everything in this damn city is made with butter or cheese. There is a lull in the conversation, and then, “She has no reason to hold on to me. I’ll just stay with you, in the back of the class.”

Marinette laughs at this.

“Lila isn’t going to let you go.”

“What do you mean by that? She let you go.” Damian almost feels like he should be affronted at some of the statements that Marinette has made. He feels like she doesn’t appreciate or know how capable he is. It feels weird to have somebody not hold him to the impossibly high pedestal of a genius billionaire’s son. Now that he’s with Marinette, he’s glad that the Justice League sent him under a different last name. He can only imagine the chaos that it would have caused when he arrived.

Marinette rolls her eyes. “She didn’t willingly let me go. She only did because I was constantly undermining her, though unsuccessfully. And besides, there’s a very big difference between the two of us.”

“I’m very capable at undermining people.”

“I have no doubt about that,” Marinette snorts. Damian Grayson is quite the character. They’ve met in the oddest of situations each time. At first, she thought he might be a stalker, but after getting to know Damian a little better, Marinette believes that it’s coincidence-- there’s no way that someone with as much pride as Damian would go out of his way to follow a mere girl. If he wanted to go out with someone, he’d simply demand it. “But the key difference is our gender. Lila Rossi may be bisexual, but her desired gender of arm candy is male. I’m sure you’ve seen her with Adrien. The blonde one?”

At Damian's nod, Marinette continues. “Don’t get your ego even more inflated, but you are good looking. You’re Lila’s type. Tall, muscular, green eyed. You’re the perfect balance to Adrien’s sunshine demeanor. Besides, she can’t have a girl with self-confidence within her circle, so there was no way that we could have peacefully coexisted in the same group to begin with.”

Marinette’s comment about his appearance makes him feel an unexpected shock of pleasure. He knows he’s good looking. All of the Wayne kids are. He’s gotten enough compliments on his appearance to last him ten lifetimes. But knowing that Marinette finds him attractive feels different. She doesn't seem to be the type to exaggerate, and has a good objective eye for beauty.

“Yes, she already has Adrien. She doesn’t need me as well.”

“Greed never stops.” Marinette finishes her cup of hot cocoa and now stares at her ceiling, then at the wall opposite her, covered in fabric and design sketches. It seems like it was only yesterday when the walls of her bedroom were filled with the countless modelling endeavors of one Adrien Agreste. Now, there are very few pictures of him at all. She wishes that she got to hang out with him more, civilian to civilian.

When she figured out that Adrien Agreste and Chat Noir were the same, it was a day for the record books. She had so much emotional whiplash that day that it still gives her nausea just thinking about it. Marinette figures that it is a good thing she found out when she did, otherwise she might have continued with her crush on him and would have ended up pointlessly heartbroken. She still loves him, just not the way lovers do. Marinette also suspects that Adrien himself is not looking for a relationship of any sort besides friendship. He’s been more tense in recent months, and Chat Noir confessed that people touching him made him uncomfortable.

Marinette wants nothing more but to rip Adrien from Asshole Gabriel’s hands. But she can’t, because Marinette doesn’t have the trust of Adrien Agreste. Not in the capacity that she needs him to. Not in the capacity that will allow her to unseat Gabriel as she so desperately wishes to. If Ladybug entrusted Marinette to help Adrien out, there is no doubt that Adrien would figure out her alter ego, and that is dangerous knowledge. Especially since he is so tense with everything else going on in his life. It’s a recipe for a powerful akuma and the horrifying possibility of Hawkmoth learning her civilian identity. Ever since retiring the other heroes, Marinette knows that she can’t afford to have Chat Noir or Adrien akumatized. She’s certain that she can beat him in either form, but on the off chance that Hawkmoth decides on a mass akumatization, she can’t beat them all. She’s just not strong enough, no matter how many hours she trains and no matter how many times she takes down baddies in her civilian form.

“So what, I should just let her put her hands all over me?”

That… admittedly sounds unpleasant. Marinette isn’t sure what Adrien and Lila have going on, but Marinette knows that they’re not actually in a relationship. She’s fairly sure that Adrien and Lila have stuck some sort of deal on their own, but she’s not close enough to ask Adrien, and she’s definitely not going to ask Lila. Still, when Marinette addressed her concerns with Lila’s touchy tendencies, Adrien gave her a weak smile and said that that was just part of Lila’s nature. He implied that he dealt with worse, which made Marinette worried to hell and back, but ultimately Adrien convinced Marinette that touching him was not done with ill intent by Lila and that her touch warded off other people’s interest. He promised that he was fine, and that he would tell Marinette if he was really uncomfortable. So Marinette let sleeping dogs lie, because despite her initial animosity towards Lila, she was good at manipulating attention away from Adrien whenever he was having a particularly bad day.

“I told you, I can get you transferred out.”

“And I told you that I never back down from a challenge.”

“Then it seems like we’re at an impasse.”

“I suppose we are.”

Marinette’s phone alarm goes off, and she jumps from her chaise. “We’ve got to get back to school. Class starts in five. You go first, I’ll clean up.”

“I am not a rude houseguest.”

“Well, I don’t want to be seen with you in school, so leave.” Marinette’s sudden burst of rudeness is unlike her, but she chalks it down to her deep-rooted desire for Damian not to end up like the four transfers last year. She keeps in contact with some of them still, and not all of them are doing all too well. Marinette really doesn’t want Damian to end up like that.

Damian’s mouth sets itself into a thin line. “Fine then, have it your way. Give me your phone number.”

A shrug. “If that’s what it’ll take for you to leave me alone during school.”

And then, Damian is off.

4:50PM | Unknown number: I’m testifying next Thursday.

4:55PM | Marinette: Damian?

Damian: Yes.

Marinette: oh

Marinette: me too

Marinette: i’m going to visit renee tomorrow

4:58PM | Damian: I’ll come with you. I’ll meet you at your parent’s bakery after school.

6:42PM | Marinette: uh

Marinette: how about that alleyway instead

Damian: If I must.

Marinette doesn’t really know what to make of Damian. The first time she meets him, she almost thinks he is another stalker. Almost, but not quite; he looks far too reluctant to be following her and looks too unfamiliar with the streets that they were going down to have done this before. Still, she doesn’t want to take any chances, so she makes quick work of her first stalker and immediately gets on the phone with the police, leaving her stalker in the alley despite her normal protocol to stay with the criminal until the police get there. She makes an exception for this, because even from a distance, the second person following her looks much more dangerous than the first, and she doesn’t want to fight with someone who’s bigger than her in a place that’s hard to run away in.

When he appears near the alleyway he seems annoyed, then relieved and surprised when he sees the body in the alleyway. Like it was something he didn’t want to deal with.

When she brushes past him, there isn’t a hint of recognition in his eyes. Nothing except for surprise, and maybe a little bit of admiration. A raised eyebrow, saying, really? This short little girl just beat a man twice her size up?

She ends up in violent altercations as a civilian on an almost regular basis. According to one of her stalkers, she was just so friendly. Clearly she wanted to go out with him. It’s her fault for coming onto him. When she isn’t fending off creepy men whose profiles were nearly all the same-- five to ten years older than her, with some sort of fetish for asian women (she shudders at the thought of being called exotic)-- she does her duty as a plain-clothes hero. Because her conscience will never let her get away with walking away from an instance that might end up harming someone else. Marinette feels an overwhelming sense of responsibility. She won’t forgive herself for not protecting the weak.

The next time she meets him, she’s surprised that he actually approaches her and asks if she needs help. He clearly doesn’t actually want her to take him up on the offer, so she immediately turns him down. Marinette isn’t sure why he feels so compelled to offer his help when he clearly didn’t want to but-- oh merde. The class is going to leave her behind again if she doesn’t run and try to catch the bus now. She can take the metro, but she is short on the amount she needs to get all the way home. Marinette is also unwilling to turn into Ladybug, because Ladybug only ever shows up on night patrols and when there’s an akuma, and she doesn’t want to send Parisians into a mass panic.

Despite his obvious unwillingness, she reneges on her words and asks him to watch over the thief. He seems more at ease with it than she expected. Maybe he really had meant his offer. Weird. She is usually pretty good at reading people. Why can’t she get a good read on this guy?

His posture, too, is more at ease than she would expect of any civilian. Usually, if she ever asks somebody to watch over somebody she’s detained, they’re nervous and a little jumpy. Their hands are glued to their phone, ready to make a call if the slightest thing goes wrong. But this guy is relaxed and confident. Just the way he’s standing screams of years of training, in fighting and possibly in etiquette. Maybe he comes from some high class family.

She doesn’t have time to contemplate why and where and how. She just leaves him.

Then he comes in like a ghost, when she’s helping poor Nicolette. Somehow, Marinette knows this voice, this step pattern. She only needs a single glance up to confirm her beliefs. It’s the guy she keeps seeing around town.

Despite her initial impression that he wasn’t dangerous, she still takes the proper measures to protect herself, just in case. She can never be too sure in situations like these, and although he has been nothing but helpful, she doesn’t particularly want to be on the receiving end of one of his punches. He looks like an athlete. Long, lean muscle. Dangerous too, if his eyes are anything to go by.

They’re dark green and calculating. He’s gone through Things. Marinette can almost guarantee that the guy has encountered at least a few life-threatening situations.

She wonders how it is that he only ever seems to appear once she’s done with whatever issue she’s dealing with. Is he stalking her to see the extent of her abilities? Is he trying to make her let her guard down? Something about him makes Marinette anxious. He looks like he wants to tear her apart to see her inner workings. To figure her out. He makes Marinette feel like he’s always on the verge of finding out her biggest secret, and she hates it.

Still, he makes for a pretty reliable cleanup partner. She doesn’t think that she would trust a regular civilian to keep watch over any person she thought was dangerous. Fraser is just a little too dangerous for Marinette to consider leaving alone in the street. She certainly would not have passed his care to any regular stranger.

But Nicolette is clearly in need of comfort, and Damian looks like he can take care of himself and any trouble that comes his way. Which makes Marinette even more wary of him. Would she be able to beat him in her civilian form? She is certain that she could if he is just some common street thug-- she’s taken down people bigger than him-- but she gets the foreboding feelings that he is more than that.

It’s almost comforting to see Damian’s reaction to Ladybug and the akuma. He looks equal parts confused and awe struck. There is a touch of cynicism in there, for sure, a little bit of disbelief, but somehow, it lets Marinette breathe a temporary sigh of relief.

He doesn’t know what is going on in Paris. He doesn’t know her-- either side of her. And it is going to stay that way.

Of course it doesn’t stay that way. Marinette uses up all of her luck during her time as Ladybug, so the person who is currently at the top of her Avoid list shows up to her school as the American transfer. Of course he decides to sit next to her. She bemoans the loss of her blessedly empty desk. Damian is taller and larger than most boys their age, but he sits far enough away from her.

That’s a good sign. He’s not going out of his way to touch her or make contact with her. Maybe this whole thing is just a coincidence. Please, let this whole thing be just a coincidence

Then he starts talking to her, and of course he notices the whole thing with Lila, how can he not? She didn’t make a wrong judgement on his level of perceptiveness. Great. That is one thing she would have gladly lost a bet on. Now, she has to deal with possible ramifications of Damian, six foot Adonis, not wanting to get along with Lila. Lila will not like this. Marinette knows exactly what she wants in her little circle: attractive boys and girls that are less pretty or less confident than her. People who are easily controlled by promises and tall tales. And although Damian only fits one of those categories, he will undoubtedly be on her shopping list.

After their awful first year together, Lila proposed a truce of sorts. They could either try being friends or they could stay out of each other’s ways. Lila wouldn’t actively bully Marinette, and Marinette wouldn’t actively try to expose her.

She can feel Lila’s eyes on her. Green. It seems like everybody and anybody who brought her trouble nowadays had green eyes. Tonight, she’ll throw out all the green items that she owns. Marinette doesn’t need any more bad luck around her.

They return from lunch, and Marinette prays to every God whose name she knows that he is no longer sitting in the back seat. That Lila successfully swept him up.

Of course she hasn’t. Damian’s too smart for his own damn good. Which means that she needs to start preparing for the consequences of the inevitable fallout. She really doesn’t want Damian to turn into an akuma. She’s pretty good at telling which people will be more powerful (devastating? devastating.) in their akumatized forms than others, and she’s pretty sure that Damian would round out her top five, alongside Adrien, her Maman, her cousin, Bridgette, and herself. People who have more control over themselves are that much scarier when they fall apart.

This time, Damian shows up before things are completely settled, and she’s thankful for it.

If she wants to build a case against this woman, she does not need accusations of her own violence levelled against her. Thus, Marinette had been almost entirely ready and willing to feel the woman’s slap, maybe even her nails cutting through her skin. None of that matters, though. Not in comparison to Renee’s future.

In Renee, Marinette can see a lot of Adrien. He is blonde, is soft spoken from what little she’s seen of him, and lives firmly under a rich and manipulative parent’s thumb. Even though he’s scared of getting hit by his mom, Marinette can feel, instinctively, that if she hits the woman back, not only will she be in trouble with the case, she will also have scared Renee.

Damian steps in at exactly the right time, and leaves her free to call the police.

Though he’s quiet throughout the ride to the station, she does see him look at the little boy in concern. Other than that, he seems curious. A little child-like, even. His eyes are darting around the inside of the cruiser. It’s almost comical. Maybe he’s scared of being in the back of the police car, but she can’t find it in her to bring out a laugh. Not when Renee is on her lap. Not when she can feel his tears through her shirt and his soft little hiccups. Marinette hates that woman. Hates her so much. Hates Gabriel, too.

Marinette is focusing more on Renee and the woman more than Damian, but when she does spare him a glance, he seems unsure. Discomfited. Maybe he wants to reassure Renee that it will be alright.

She has been preparing for a situation in which she can take Gabriel to court for almost an entire year now. Despite this, Marinette still pulls out her phone and checks a few websites to make sure that all of the information she has is correct. Damian pulls out his phone too, though he’s just fiddling with it so his hands have something to do.

By the time Marinette breaks past the woman’s painfully bad facade of being a good parent, Marinette feels her blood boiling. She knows that she is not immune to being akumatized, and is very glad that it’s highly unlikely Hawkmoth sends out another akuma today.

It hurt a little when she first discovered that she could be akumatized. She was thirteen, Ladybug, and invincible. Then, she was thirteen, Marinette, and scared. Despite the situation at the time, Marinette could never bring herself to fully hate Lila. In part, because she believed--and still believes-- that Adrien is at least partially right. She sees it, periodically. How lonely Lila is behind her lies and friendships. Marinette doesn’t know what the girl is missing, and she doesn’t particularly care to know, but Lila is young and immature and has time to shift her course. And after their truce, Lila backed down a lot. Her lies are soft, now. Quiet. Most times nonexistent. She doesn’t need to do much to manipulate the class into loving her because she laid down all the groundwork during that first, horrible year.

But Marinette feels entitled to be angry at these parents who treat their children like they are nothing more than tools. Like they are subhuman. Maybe some parents can’t love their children-- she understands that to some extent-- and maybe they can’t be with them all the time. However, if love isn’t possible, they should still treat their child with the basic courtesy of human decency. And there is a point where neglect turns into abuse. Marinette knows that-- sees that with Adrien and Gabriel-- all too well.

Marinette is glad that all of her previous encounters with criminals taught her to record from the moment she interferes. She is glad that she sprung for a phone with extra amounts of storage. Her palms are hot and trembly, but her head is cold. She feels a twisted sense of accomplishment wrenched from her gut as she watches Renee’s mother flee from the room.

It is in this cold daze that she finds herself outside with Damian. Alone together, again. And he asks her about Lila, and she doesn’t want to deal with whatever dangers Damian brings with him. She’s had to fight off an akuma, deal with an absolute horror of a woman, and when she goes home, she will have to finish a commission and study for a test tomorrow. Damian is an unnecessary complication.

Somehow, her life has become a never ending cycle. At least she will sleep better at night knowing that Renee is in better hands.

#miraculous ladybug #dc #mlbxdc #daminette #sbgs #original content #adrien agreste #lila rossi #marinette dupain cheng #damian wayne

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shes-an-oddbird · 3 years

Text

Christmas at River’s End Mall

Summary - A Christmas AU in which everyone navigates their seasonal jobs, relationships and Christmas spirit, or lack there of, through woven together tales inspired by holiday prompts.

Chapter 9 - Christmas Parade

Summary - While at the annual Christmas parade, Mack and Elena discuss Hope getting older and Mack steps into help when when one of the parade floats breaks down.

Prompt - Christmas Parade Relationship - Mackelena POV - Daniel

Mack wonders if they should have brought chairs with them. Unless there was snow on the ground, they’ve always just watched the parade from the curb with a blanket folded up underneath them and another one pulled around them for warmth. But considering they invited Elena to join them, maybe a chair would have been nice to offer her.

“Dad I don’t see her!”

“Calm down Sparkplug, I just texted her a minute ago.”

“Well, that’s all some of us need.” His heart does a skip at the sound of her voice behind them. Her hands land on his shoulders, her long hair and festive red scarf falling over his shoulder and she leans down to say hello.

“Yoyo, you made it!”

“Of course, the parade is a tradition right?”

Hope nods. They have a few minutes before the parade arrives, although he thinks he can hear the first of the sirens that lead the parade in the distance. The parade, which sets up in the mall parking lot, would makes its way down the main road just outside the mall and then head down towards the small downtown area. They always stayed close by the start so they could head inside after for more activities.

Elena sets her own blanket on the ground next to theirs, sitting close although there wasn’t much other option as the street became more and more crowded. As they wait for the parade to come around the corner they talk about work and weather and other mundane topics.

“So what are we up to after the parade?”

“We’re going to go see the drones, dad finally decided on the right one which is the same one I wanted from the start.” Hope turns her eyes back on him. “Do you think Fitz will be there?”

“I’m sure he will be kid, he’s probably starting to think you’re after his job you ask him so many questions.”

“CANDY!” Several kids scream in excitement as a float from the public library drifts by and the riders dressed as reindeer toss candy canes and chocolate kisses from the sleigh. Hope and the other kids surge forward to collect them.

“I have to buy that damn drone today, I’m afraid if we go back again without buying anything their going to think we’re casing the place.”

“I’m sure they’re used to it, kids are obsessed with those gadget demonstrations.”

“That’s true and half the time we don’t even go in, she just talks with Fitz, the guy who demos them, goes well beyond what I know about them.” Elena looks at him curiously. “What?”

“Nothing.” She shakes her head but she’s grinning like she knows something he doesn’t.

“What, tell me.”

Still looking far too amused she gives in. “It’s just, it sounds like Hope has a crush on him.”

“What?” Mack laughs. “That’s ridiculous.”

“Is it?”

“Oh come on, she’s only eleven, she’s not old enough to be having crushes yet.” Was she? No she was just a kid, it was ridiculous.

“Oh please, what do you know about it?” Elena laughing now at his utter disbelief.. “I was eleven when I had my first crush, and that was well after all my friends started too.”

“That’s just not like Hope, she still thinks all the boys in her class are stupid.”

She just shrugs. “Maybe that’s part of it, look I bet Hope is the smartest kid in her class right?”

“In the whole grade, maybe the whole school.” He answers proudly.

“Exactly and all her friends are starting to get crushes on these boys who are probably so boring to her, she starts to feel left out.”

That was reasonably to assume but he still only agrees with a hesitant, “I guess.”

“Then she meets Fitz, and Daisy’s told me about him, a brilliant engineer, someone who can have a conversation on her level who’s also nice to her and let’s her test all these drones and gadgets she’s preoccupied with.”

“But he’s– “

She cuts him off. “But he’s what, a grown up, you never had a crush on a teacher before?”

“Alright, I get it.” Mack contemplates this new revelation. When exactly had Hope gotten old enough to have crushes. Was he supposed to do anything about it. He had promised they would go there to get the drone after the parade. “Should I take her back there?”

“I don’t see why not, if you don’t and she finds out why she might think she’s done something wrong,” Elena advises. “But maybe give Fitz a heads up, it’s hard having your first crush at eleven but having your first heartbreak at eleven is ten times worse.”

Mack nods, making a mental note to pull Fitz aside and explain. Then he looks back at Elena a little in awe. “How did you get so good with kids?”

“I’m not, but I was a little girl once, it’s a tough life.”

She’s so pleased with herself. That was one of the first things he realized about her that he really liked; she was confident. Determined and straight forward.

And now they’re exceptionally close together. Forced into each other’s personal space as kids return to the sidewalk, arms full of treats. He blinks and she’s closer again, leaning in towards him.

There’s a deafening screech and they snap apart. The parade has rolled to a stop and a horrible grinding noise is emitting from the truck hauling the River’s End High School’s float. It rolls to a stop and cuts off. The crowd around them chatters in concern while the students frantically dismount the float and the truck bed.

“What’s going on?” One girl yells from the float.

“The truck must have stalled.” Another answers.

“Flint, what’s going on up there!”

The skinny young boy driving the truck leans out the window and shouts back at them. “It won’t turn back on.”

“Gabe, I thought your brother fixed up this thing.” A girl with white-blonde hair storms around the float, frustration evident as she addresses a boy still sitting in the bed of the truck.

“He had the guys at the shop take a look at it.”

“Well can you fix it?”

“Yeah Ruby, let me just jump right down from here and look under the hood.” The boy snapped back sarcastically.

The boy driving the truck jumps out and runs around to the front to lift the hood. “Yeah, I don’t exactly know what I’m looking for here.”

“This is going well.” Elena whispers to him as he watches them concerned.

“Old model, bad engine, probably something one of the kids picked up for cheap.” Maybe it was the mechanic in him but he was already assessing everything wrong with the truck. Even if it hadn’t stalled making it to the end of the parade would be a Christmas miracle.

“Dad, do you think you can help them?” Hopes asks.

“I haven’t got my tools, not sure there is much I could do.”

“I don’t think it could hurt.” Elena says, her eyes wide a the boy at the hood yanks his arm back as it crashes down. He’s joined by a girl with lots of dark curly hair and they open the hood again, steading it on the support.

“Alright.” He pushes himself off the ground “before someone loses a hand.”

Mack jogs out into the parade chaos. He has to clear a path through the crowd of students now converging at the front of the truck.

“This truck belong to one of you?” He shouts.

“It’s mine sir.” The girl with the dark curly hair speaks up.

“You have this problem before?” He asks. A glance over the engine and its not as bad as he anticipated, it’d clearly already had some decent work done on it but unfortunately it doesn’t show any obvious cause to the problem.

“Yes, but someone was supposed to have it checked out for me.” She glares at the boy now wheeling his way towards them.

“Shut it Tess, I’m trying to get Robbie on the phone.”

Mack tries hard not to groan. He’s so not ready for Hope to be on the verge of her teenage years.

He needs to check the radiator and fuel but its too hot to reach for anything with his bare hands. “Have any of you got an old rag or t-shirt?”

“There’s probably one in the truck.”

“Grab if for me, what about a flashlight.”

“I’ve got my phone.” Flint grabs the phone from his pocket and holds it out over the engine.

“Thanks kid.”

“Here.” The girl hands him a stained t-shirt. He manages to get the cap off the radiator but it doesn’t appear to be the issue.

“Was there any odds smells when you were driving?”

Flint shakes his head. “No, I don’t think so.”

Alright, that rules out a few possibilities.

“No, Robbie its fine, someone else is here already,” Gabe listened for a second, nodding along unimpressed before holding the phone out to him. “He wants to talk to you.”

Mack begrudgingly accepts the phone. “This is Mack.”

“Hey,” a voice with an accent like the boy’s greets him shortly, “the truck stalls on inclines and my brother won’t tell me where you are.”

That explains a lot. “They didn’t make it far, we’re on the main road outside the mall.”

“Dammit, my crew was supposed to fix the problem.”

“No worries, I think it’ll start again, its been down for a few minutes, doesn’t seem to have any other issues unless it’s the extra weight.”

“Give it a try, if they can get off that hill the parade levels out, should make it to the end.” Mack nods at Flint who jumps back in the truck.

“Easy.” He calls. Flint starts the engine which, after a long moment, stubbornly springs to life and relief washes over the students. “Alright its going.”

Robbie sighs. “I’ll get a backup truck over there just in case, first I gotta go fire somebody.” Mack chuckles, he doesn’t know this Robbie fellow, but he thinks they’d probably get along.

“I’ll follow along behind them down the hill.”

“Appreciate that.” Mack hands the phone back to Gabe.

“Alright everyone back on board, if you can make it down the hill you should be in the clear.” If there wasn’t a damn marching band in front of them, they could just throw it in neutral and roll. It takes everyone a minute to get back in place so he hurries over to Elena and Hope who are still watching from the curb.

“Everything alright?”

“Should be fine but I’m going to follow them for a bit make sure they don’t get stuck again.” Mack explains. “Do you mind hanging here with Hope?”

“Can’t we walk with you?” Hope asks.

“She can ride with us if she wants.” Tess, the curly haired girl offers. Hope’s eyes light up and she looks pleadingly up at him. Personally, he doesn’t want her anywhere near that truck but at two miles an hour she’d probably be safe.

“Alright, let’s go.” Mack lifts Hope up onto the float. Tess takes her hand and backs her away from the edge.

“Let’s go Flint!” Gabe shouts and the other boy waves his hand out the window. They being to roll and the crowd bursts into applause.

“You saved the day.” Elena nudges his shoulder as they begin to walk along side the float.

“I didn’t really have to do anything.”

“Well, you get credit for trying, I didn’t see anyone else run out there to help, just heard a bunch of moaning and complaining.”

“Yeah well, they’re good kids, but now all I can think about is how that’s going to be Hope in a few years.”

“Don’t worry about that, she’ll be just fine, she’s got an excellent role model to look up to.” She nudges his arm again, this time slipping her hand into his as they walk.

#mackelena #alphonso mackenzie #elena rodriguez #hope mackenzie #aos fic #aos #christmas at the mall #25 days of christmas

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surveys-at-your-service · 5 years

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Survey #219

“make a move and you pay for it; pick a lord and you pray to it.”

Do you actually love your grandpa? I don't really remember either of mine. I do from what I remember and have learned of them, though. Do you actually love your grandma? I don't remember my dad's mom at all, but I mean, I love her simply for being my dad's mother, who loved her. My mom's mom, yeah, even though she's. Hard to like a lot of the time. Do you have Facebook? Yes. What was the last thing you posted on someone’s wall? A birthday post. Do you have MySpace? My old one still exists, but I sure haven't been on it since it was current. What is your favorite kind of music? Heavy metal. Favorite soft drink? Mountain Dew Voltage is actually cocaine to me rip. Favorite food? Probably like... pepperoni pizza or cheeseburgers. I'm a full-blooded 'Merican. Have you ever felt replaced? OH, HAVE I! Have you ever worn false eyelashes? No. Do you ever regret making a friend? I don't think so. Can you cure mental illness? I don't know about cure, but you can certainly learn how to handle it better and alleviate symptoms. Is God good? Define "God." Cats or dogs? Kitties. Do you play video games? Yeah, but I don't play nearly the variety that I used to. Do you take medication for mental health? Yes. Can you really be racist to a white person? No shit? Do you have a favorite hair accessory? What does it look like? No. What’s your favorite type of insect? Butterflies. What’s your LEAST favorite type of insect? Larvae, like maggots. Disgusting. Who was the last person you Facebook messaged? What did you say? What’s his/her favorite food? Idk and I don't feel like checking. I rarely use it. What was the last song you listened to? Does it mean anything to you? "Thoughts & Prayers" by Motionless In White is a mood with my mad-at-God-24/7 ass. It needs to stop honestly. I've become so hateful about religion. Not towards followers, mind you, just the concept itself. I could write a novel on this, but I don't feel like it. Just me and organized religion don't get along anymore. Have you ever slept in a water bed? On a water mattress, yeah. How do you feel about having sex during your menstrual period? Never tried, not for me. Sounds messy. Does your ex have a job? My most recent, I guess you mean? Yeah. Have you ever slept in a car? Yeah, on long drives to like New York and stuff. What was the last term of endearment you used (babe, hun, dear, etc)? *checks phone* "Sweetie." How often do you use Flickr? Never. I can't log into my account anymore since Yahoo said "fuck u Britt," so there's no point. Have you ever been on a blind date? No. Do you have a crush on the last person you texted? She's my girlfriend so y'know like- Have you ever got into an argument with the last person you kissed? We very much disliked each other at first, so... guess, lmao. Have you ever liked somebody who was nice to you, but horrible to everyone else? Eh, that's a mystery... Juan was very sweet to me, but I know he had a bad rep. I didn't really see how he interacted with others. How’s your appetite atm? It's normal. I'm not currently hungry. Out of all the conversations you’ve had recently, which one has made you smile or laugh the most? Sara randomly and excitedly texted me to tell me "Welcome to the Jungle" was on at work, which was on the radio both when I was there and she was here, so she thought of how much she missed me lakdjsfkalwe I smiled my face in half. Do you look decent in your most recent photograph? Eh, it wasn't awful. It was for my school ID. What is one vacation destination that many people think is just fabulous but which you personally have no desire to visit (or revisit)? New York City. My sis went and said it was 1.) insane and 2.) disgusting. If you were five years younger but knew everything at that age that you’ve actually learned over the last five years, what is one thing you would definitely do differently? Go to the partial hospitalization program way sooner. What serves as the greatest motivation for you in your daily life? To earn a happy, content future. What activity that you have to do every once in a while that you dread the most? "Every once in a while," I'd say clean Mitsu's cage. She is such a strange rat. Enjoys pets, but being picked up is a no sir. When people hear what you do for a living, what is the most typical question or comment they give you regarding your job? N/A If you were left alone for one hour with nothing more than a pen and a notepad, what would you be inclined to draw or write during those 60 minutes? I'd probably write a poem. I know I wouldn't draw 'cuz fuck no am I doing so with a pen. If you could witness anything at all in super-slow motion, what would you want to see? Uhhh. Idk. Anything I can think of, like lightning, I've seen because of the Internet. If someone were looking for you in a bookstore, in what section would they be most likely to find you? Probably like, young adult fiction/fantasy, something like that. What do you forget to do more often than anything else? Lately, take one of my mood stabilizers. I need to get the box out... aaaand forget every day. I haven't felt any different without it tho so like... If you could teach everyone in the world one skill, what would it be? Compassion, maybe. You’ve been offered the chance to paint a billboard along a highway with any message you choose, as long as it’s only 10 words long. What is your message? I'm not spending time musing over something that serious lakaljdsfawe. Would you ever travel to Africa? Hell yes. I desperately want to go to South Africa on the Tswalu Kalahari tour. Whose house were you last at? Besides my own, my older sister's. Have you ever had a near-death experience? I guess this depends on how near death you mean. I've been in one car accident that my mom managed to make minor only by being a good driver; realistically, we should've flipped, according to the cop. My mom just acted quickly enough. Then I heavily ODed, but I was given more than enough fluids in time to keep me surprisingly okay. I don't know what would've happened if I hadn't told Mom so quickly, and I don't care to think about it. I'm fucking lucky and don't want to think about what could've happened. Have you ever met anyone who was overly addicted to a computer game? Tbh I myself could've been in this position when my depression was so bad, but then there's factors to that that lean towards it just having been a preference versus addiction. Idk. It's not a problem anymore so not worth debating over. Have you ever been fingered? That was the first cheat when you chose abstinence lmao. What do you do the most when you are online? Watch or listen to something on YouTube. What video game have you played the most? So in WoW you can actually type in /played to see how long you've played JUST that one character up to the years (or maybe days?) down to seconds and. I will never type it in lmao. Ongoing games are v depressing. Do you have scars you don’t like to talk about? No, those are thankfully gone. What is something you and your significant other do that may seem weird to others? Be helplessly and openly in love with imaginary demons while dating each other lmao (she's a Freeza fanatic). When and why did you last cry? The second day of school because of math class. When was the last time you drank? I think like... back on the 4th of July. Or some days after 'cuz I know Mom and I didn't finish the container in one night. Do you wear jewelry a lot? Just my piercings, really. Save for on my ear lobes because the holes on the left are fucked up, yay. I'm going to wind up just slightly stretching the first holes when I can afford a small kit; actual studs or hoops look stupid. Never wanted gauges until the holes got too stretched by the weight of hoops; now something needs to be there. Who in your household do you not have a good relationship with? My sister's (who doesn't even live here...) dog Bentley. I hate him and he doesn't like me. No, that doesn't mean I mistreat a pet. He's just a pain in the goddamn ass. Who in your life are you scared to lose more than anything? My mom. I don't know what would happen to me or how I'd cope at this time. Honestly, would you rather be single or in a relationship? I'm happier in a healthy relationship. Do any of your friends not get along at all? No. I mean, not that I know of. What are your 3 favorite internet sites? I'd be LOST without YouTube, then KM follows up close. #3, uh... Facebook or Tumblr, I suppose. Have you ever gotten anything autographed, if so by who & what was it? No. Well, I do have a little book of Disney World character autographs, but I don't think that really counts. Do you prefer Walmart or Target? We use Wal-mart. Who is your favorite model? Sara is a gd model don't even @ me about it. What have you done that is out of character for you? The Joel thing is the most anti-Brittany thing I've ever done for sure. I can't think of anything more current that stands out, unless it's- NO WAIT, this was quite a few months ago, but I firmly stood against an opinion my psychiatrist made known. He's very talkative and open as hell about his beliefs in current events, and he said something about pit bulls where I was just like... um no sir. I wasn't going to be rude though to HIM of all people so just said I don't base dogs by their breed and shut up. Awkward silence and we moved on. What do you feel strong enough to protest about? LGBT acceptance and rights. I already protest by having given up Chic-fil-a okay I care y'all. What’s the biggest blooper you’ve never lived down? Who knows... What is the best thing you have done just because you were told you can’t? Idk. I'm lucky to not have really been told that... What are you most thankful for? Thinking it all over, probably being born where I am. Boy is America FUCKED UP in some places, but boy would I be in a MUCH worse place if I was born in, say, North Korea, between my mental issues, sexuality, and opinions that can go to either end of the spectrum. How do you feel about thrift shops or flea markets? I love them! You can find the coolest, wackiest shit. What do you like to put gravy on? I hate gravy with a passion. Have you ever gone canoeing/kayaking? No. What one thing in particular makes you feel good about yourself? I genuinely think I'm a nice person that has other's well-being in mind. What is priceless to you? Love, in any form. What is one thing you know about your family history you’re proud of? Uhhh. I guess more than anything, I'm proud of my distant cousin for her unwavering love for and loyalty to her daughter when it came to escaping the Middle East and her dictatorial husband. Read Not Without My Daughter, it's great. Do you keep a budget? I don't have an income. What makes you feel rested and refreshed? Rested, a good night's sleep following being truly exhausted. Refreshed, oh man, gimme a hot, long shower. Who depends on you the most? Nobody. Could you ever be someone’s bodyguard? Hell no. Has one of your biggest fears come true? Yes. I was entirely convinced the world would literally end if Jason left. That night still doesn't feel real. Have you ever let your mom or significant other fight a battle for you? Colleen and Mom once fought after I'd ignored her, so I guess? It wasn't my wish or anything though for her to do it; Mom had shit to say by her own volition, and I wasn't going to tell my mother "no you can't do that." Did you create a checklist for your ideal spouse? No? Have you ever ridden on a subway or train and what did you like about it? Nope. Do you have to experience something to fully understand it? Yes. What embarrasses you instantly? A LOT A LOT A LOT!!!!! It is SO easy to embarrass me, including second-handedly. Do you think you could be a firefighter, why/why not? Hell no, I'm most certainly not in the necessary shape, and quite honestly I'm not that willing to risk my life for random people that could be assholes. What do you think should be censored? Idk. I have mixed feelings on censorship, no matter how stupid it seems. Eh... yeah, idk. Are you related to anyone famous or historical, if so who? Queen Victoria and William Clark. Would you ever donate a kidney to anyone, and who? Depends on who and obviously if we're even compatible. Have you ever fired a gun? No. What is the main quality you think makes a great parent? Sincerely caring for them, probably. Who is a female role model in your life? My mom, in some ways. What childhood dreams have you neglected? Jfc a lot, I don't want to think about it. What do you have trouble seeing clearly in your mind? My future, honestly. It's hard picturing my elderly days. Like I'm not suicidal anymore, I just don't really... realize I'll get there, I guess. I can't picture myself being old and alive. Would you travel to space if possible? No, too long of a trip. Are you an optimistic person? I'm a realist. Do you consider yourself more realistic OR idealistic? ^ Have you ever felt bi-curious? I started out accepting myself as bisexual through thinking myself as bicurious. I quickly realized "bisexual" was more accurate than "bicurious," but it was an easier thing to shift acceptance towards in regards to yourself when you thought you were straight for 21 years. Are you a fan of U.S. President Donald Trump? No sir. I agree with some of his ideas, but I hate him as an asshole person without a trace of manners. Do you know anyone with autism, mood disorders or learning disabilities? Multiple. I'd assume most people know someone who fits at least one criterion there. Are you green-eyed? Not exactly, but they definitely have a green hue to them. They're a gray/green blue. Would you consider UFC fighting and WWE real sports events? I think it's beyond debate that a lot of it is staged, but I mean, I guess to a degree? You still have to fight. It's physical exertion. Have you ever had an immediate relative pass away of cancer? No. Wait. I can't remember if my grandmother had cancer or not... but I don't think so. She was just old. Would you rather work in an office, warehouse or on a retail shop floor? An office, definitely. In my work-hunting as well as actual work experience, office work is probably the only job I could actually do that doesn't require a degree... Do you have a favorite wild animal? Why? You can't know me and not be fully aware meerkats are my favorite animal. Why? Ho boy. I love social species, and meerkats have such strong personalities, and holy shit are those little things brave as fuck. They're so GOSH DARN CUTE!!!! too, and their loyalty to each other is astounding. I love how playful and curious the little guys are, and... just wow okay, I could write an actual essay on how I adore meerkats so goddamn much. Do you have any unusual, uncommon phobias? I'm sure there are other people afraid of whale sharks, but I don't think it's common? And is an actual phobia of pregnancy uncommon? Idk. Do you prefer Android or iPhone? I hate my Android. I've had an iPhone in the past, and it was great. Are you a fan of sweet, sour, salty, or savory snacks? All, depending on my mood. Most often I'd say I like sweet. Do you believe climate change is real? We can't be friends if you don't. Do you believe in evolution OR creationism? Evolution. Do you think people can really predict the future? Nah. Have you been to a lot of shrinks? I hate that word. Just call them therapists. But yeah. How often do you clean your room? Not often enough. I need to dust... Any movies coming out soon that you want to see? I DESPERATELY wanna see the "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" one. Those books were my CHILDHOOD. What was the last fear you overcame? I don't know about totally overcame, but vocational rehab helped me quite a bit with answering the phone to numbers I didn't recognize. Have you ever hurt yourself trying to crack a body part? No, nothing on me really cracks. Well no, both my big toes do, but no, I haven't hurt myself trying to crack them. What’s the worst part about winter? The days where it's cold BUT ALSO WINDY asdkljfaklwej;awe Summer? It's too fucking hot and probably humid, too. Spring? POLLEN. Fall? Literally nothing. :') Are you allergic to anything? Pollen and silver. How many times have you changed a diaper in your life? Like, once. Which country has the most fascinating culture? Oh boy, idk. Who does your favorite song? Idrk what my current favorite song is. I say my all-time fave is "False Flags" by Massive Attack, but it's not something I constantly wanna listen to. I guess you could maybe say it's "Headache" by Motionless In White; I play and repeat that a lot. I've really been digging them lately. When was the last time you wore makeup? Shit dude, idk. Months ago. Do you prefer males or females or both? I'm generally afraid of men, but I mean, I don't "prefer" one over the other if he's a good guy. Where in your town do you go when you wanna chill with a few friends? I don't have any friends I go out with. But there's nowhere to go here anyway. Where’s the best place to get coffee? N/A Have you ever seen someone struggle with an addiction? My dad was an alcoholic, but he's recovered. He loved (idk if he still does it) fantasy football, too. Pretty sure I got my addictive personality from him, lol. When was the last time someone gave you flowers? Early 2017. Do you like cranberry juice? omfg NO. Do you play any zombie-killing video games? The Last of Us is fucking dope, but I didn't finish it before my PS3 broke. :'( I like the Resident Evil series too, and some of those games have zombies or similar creatures. And The Walking Dead game tears my heart out every fucking season. What is the dominating genre on your mp3 player/iPod? Varying forms of metal. Do you have a book shelf? No. What website do you spend way too much time on? YouTube is ALWAYS open. I constantly either watch let's players and a few other kinds of YTers, moving windows around so I can see it and do other things, or listen to music. Do you like wind chimes? I LOVE!!!!!!!!!! WINDCHIMES!!!!!!!!!! Do you have a fetish? No. Do you have a pet fish? No. Don't get me wrong, they're beautiful and calming, but not worth it for me personally. They don't have much of a personality at all, and cleaning a tank so much for just a fish isn't for me. Do you like kettle corn? (That sweet and salty popcorn) Yessss! Do you enjoy classic rock? Hell yeah, man. When was the last time you went for a walk, just cause? Not since I was at Sara's last. Do you listen to Type O Negative? No. Do you have any fillings or cavities? Yeah. Have you gotten your wisdom teeth taken out yet? No, and thankfully I don't need to. One was very close to needing to be, but it has just enough room. Do you actually read privacy policies when signing up for new things? "Depending on what I’m signing up for, I’m likely to at least skim it." <<< This. Did you have a lot of birthday parties when you were younger? If so, did you invite everyone in the class? I had a party every year up to... idk what age. And no, I only invited friends. Do you like when things are color coordinated? Yes. Have you ever participated in one of those “guess how many jelly beans, mints, etc. are in this jar!” contest? if so, have you ever won? Yeah, and no. Can you juggle? Nope. Have you ever mistaken a ringing phone on TV or in a movie for your own? Who hasn't? How often do you use bobby pins? Never. My hair's really too short for them. Well, I'd probably pin the right side up if I was doing something like cleaning. Do you live on an avenue, road, drive or something else? Road. What are your school colors? Blue and white. Have you ever taken a picture with Santa when you were little? Yeah. Have you ever rolled down a steep, grassy hill for fun? Actually yeah. Do you like Nerds candy? Yes I do.

#survey #quiz #questions #random #bored

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ahon3992 · 6 years

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When Waves of Depression Strike

When people hear the term “depression,” usually one’s first thoughts would include feeling sad and alone. Depression is a mental disease that conquers a person’s ability to feel much of anything. It is something that not only affects the mind, but the body as well. My therapist once told me depression can be as common as a cold; anyone is prone to getting it and nobody ever knows how long it will last. While depression can make a person feel sad and lonely, it also can destroy the inside of a person’s body and health, actually causing physical pain and other mental disorders. Depression all around is a terrible illness that harms people everyday.

A lot of people do not associate depression with physical pain/illnesses. While depression can also cause eating disorders, loneliness, helplessness, hopelessness, etc, people seem to forget the term “stress will kill you.” While this is something a lot of people do not fully understand, depression and the stress that comes with it can start to cause physical harm to one’s self along with the tightness of muscles, joints, headaches, migraines, etc. In an article written by Trivedi Madhukar M.D, he states, “There is a study that has shown that there are neurotransmitters that can cause mood swings and physical pain which are serotonin and norepinephrine” (Madhukar). Both of these have been linked to depression.

The physical pain of depression could be stemming from multiple things; “IBS, gastrointestinal problems, chronic joint pain, limb pain, back pain, tiredness, sleep disturbances, psychomotor activity changes, and appetite changes. Because many people who seek treatment only report the physical symptoms, depression is one of the hardest things to diagnose” (Madhukar). Once a person who is diagnosed with depression starts to receive treatment, some of these physical pain signs start to diminish. The more severe the depression is, however, the more severe the physical pain is. This is because there is a neurologic pathway.

When someone who suffers from depression is left alone for extended periods of time, they start wondering why they are even alive. Regression of the mind begins to happen leaving the person upset, confused, angry, along with many other emotions. They feel like nobody wants them around and that they are better off alone. Many people know somebody who suffers from depression and always tries to make sure they include them in outings and events, and normally the person just declines the invitation because being around people and large crowds make them nervous and uncomfortable. The best feeling in the world for someone who has depression is isolation from the world; being where nobody can find them, alone, in the dark, with nothing and nobody around them. While this may seem like a terrible idea, try explaining that to the person who is suffering.

Some of the effects of this loneliness that is associated with depression are often led to anxiety, social anxiety, eating disorders, changes in attitude, etc. Anxiety and social anxiety are obvious, but what about eating disorders? People who suffer from depression think they will never be good enough for anyone and unless they are perfect, they will never be satisfied. Whether is it someone who starts eating like crazy and blows up in weight, or someone who now suffers from bulimia and anorexia, this causes more problems physically, mentally, and emotionally. The worst part is a person will not stop until they have met their desired needs, which unfortunately, may result in death.

If a person has taken a psychology class of any sort, they learn that it can take a person less than five days to become addicted to an opiate drug. While opiates are dangerous in themselves as a drug that is highly addictive, what about antidepressants (Zoloft, Lexapro, etc) and barbiturates (Xanex, Klonopin, etc)? If people find a drug that is working for them, they do not want to feel like they are dependent on them, but also do not want to lose the feeling of control they have over their lives in that present time. The thing with a drug like Xanex is that it is a “controlled” substance. This means that it is to be taken x amount of times a day. Doctors usually will prescribe a small dosage of 0.25mg once or twice a day, while other people may need a higher dosage of 1mg or 5mg a day. This is where the problem comes into play.

When people become addicted to an antidepressant or a barbiturate, there is only so many of these pills one person can consume before they become immune to it. What this means is a person will start turning to harder drugs to get the same mental relief that the original prescription gave them, but now with a physical high that they learn to love. This is when it becomes addiction; when a person is dependent on medicine to make them feel better and to take all the pain away. Becoming an addict leads to a series of issues. Stealing, mood swings, aggressiveness, and uncontrollable behavior are just a few things that stem from addiction. Then worst-case scenario, death. When people give a cry for help with depression, people automatically assume medicine will cure all when in reality, it’s not for everyone. More people should try finding an outlet before trying a pill that could possibly lead to more issues later in life.

Depression is not something that should be taken lightly and is something that can end disastrous. It is something that a person may live with on a day to day basis or depression may come in waves. The biggest thing about depression is a person may never know when it is going to hit them or what may trigger the episode. There are plenty of other causes from depression, I barely scraped the surface. But please understand, that if a close friend or loved one is reaching out to you for help, take the time out of your day to assist them with anything they may need. Addiction and being alone in one’s mind are two of the scariest things a person can endure, but if a person starts complaining about unexplained pain or body movements and nobody can find answers, understand that they may be experiencing pain from an episode of depression with a trigger from an outside source. Depression is a “silent killer” and a smile is all it takes to hide the signs.

#depression #anxiety #eatingdisorders #life #love #recovery

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mosylufanfic · 7 years

Text

The Weight of the World

I noticed that Iris didn't seem to be at CCPN at all in the premiere (unless I missed a throwaway line, in which case this is pure AU), so this popped into my head, of course. I really hope we see her there again because she's great at it, and I also loved that she had the ability to view things from a different perspective than Star Labs. We'll see, I guess. Anyway. Angst.

The Weight of the World

"This isn't a disciplinary meeting, Iris," Scott said.

She stared at him across the table. CCPN's human resources rep, sat between them, looking bland and nonjudgmental. She'd introduced herself as Cassidy, a weirdly perky name under the circumstances.

"Okay," Iris said.

"I'm concerned," Scott said. "About you. You've been missing a lot of deadlines, and what you've have turned in lately has been - " He paused. The slash slash slash of his red pen over all her most recent stories echoed in her ears. "Not up to your usual standards."

She looked at her hands in her lap. Her nail polish was chipped to hell.

"You've been taking a lot of sick days. Coming in late, going home early, disappearing in the middle of the day, and nobody can reach you."

"Yes," Iris said. “I mean. No.” What did she mean?

"I get that you probably miss your fiance pretty badly." To Cassidy, Scott explained, "He's on sabbatical." His eyes slid around to Iris. "In the . . . Czech Republic."

Had that been a note of skepticism in his voice? Iris's eyes narrowed.

It was a dumb story but she'd gone along with it, for her dad's sake. Even though it made everything that much worse when somebody asked her at the coffee station how Barry was doing in Europe, if she'd heard from him lately or if he'd sent her any cute souvenirs.

Not from where he is, Iris thought, and looked back down at her hands. God. Her thumb was especially bad. She'd never let it get this bad before.

She couldn't bring herself to care.

"The thing is," Scott said, "I'm worried. You don't seem like yourself. Not since - " he paused, brow furrowing. "Oh, I'd say, January or so. Is there something else going on in your life?"

Was there something else going on in her life?

She'd spent five months thinking she was going to die, and then two more in so far over her head she felt like she was constantly drowning. Barry was gone into the Speed Force to keep it from breaking open like the multiverse's worst egg. She was trying to hold the city together, doing with two cocky, still-learning superheroes what had required a fleet of people and a skilled hero before.

Was there something else going on.

Scott said, "Iris, are you - "

Cassidy said quickly, "What he means to say, Ms. West - "

West-Allen. My name is Iris West-Allen.

"- is that if you have a health issue, or a family issue - which you are under no legal obligation to disclose - CCPN can make accommodations. Again, this is entirely your choice about what or how much you want to tell us."

"I - " Iris said.

"Is there something going on?" Scott asked.

"I . . . I lost . . . somebody," she said slowly. "A couple of months ago."

"The guy who died in May?" Scott asked.

Iris's heart did a sort of lurch and twist and belly flop - died, he didn't die, he's just not in this dimension anymore - before she realized he meant HR. Right, Scott had approved her time off for the funeral. Fine, let him think that.

"Yes. And . . . and it's gotten to me more than I thought it would."

True, it had shaken her badly, seeing HR die in her place, murdered by someone with the face of the man she loved, sent there by someone else with the face of a friend.

But it was wholly overshadowed by losing Barry. Her best friend, her love, the other half of herself. Gone, and she couldn't even be angry because he'd done it to save everybody.

(No, she could be angry. She could be angry a lot.)

Cassidy opened a folder, revealing official-looking paperwork. "Unfortunately our policies don't cover bereavement leave for non-family members. I'm sorry. However, if you were to get a diagnosis of clinical depression or PTSD stemming from the event, we could still put in for FMLA. It safeguards you against - "

"I know what FMLA does," Iris said. "It's not going to be enough."

Her words landed with a splat in the middle of the table.

Because honestly? Yes. She probably could get a diagnosis for either or both those things, if she actually found a doctor that she could be one hundred percent honest with, but it didn't matter. A few days off here and there, or even an extended leave of absence, wasn't going to be enough.

She'd burned through a lot of sick and vacation already, since May. At best, she could take a couple of weeks of paid leave, and then maybe a few more unpaid. FMLA status just meant they couldn't fire her for excessive absences, not that she magically got more time on the books.

And after that leave time was up, Barry would still be gone, and she would still be fighting.

She'd thought she'd could keep going just like she was. Keep running, keep living her life. But her shoulders strained under the weight of the whole city, millions of people's safety, and holding it up alongside going to CCPN and pretending everything was still okay -

She felt like she was being crushed further into the ground with every passing day.

Sometimes she hated Caitlin for taking off to find herself, or whatever the hell the other woman was doing while being so flagrantly not here. Sometimes she hated Caitlin for leaving first, because it meant that Iris didn’t have that option.

"Iris," Scott said. "Don't - "

"I quit," she said.

" - do anything hasty," he finished.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just can't do this job anymore."

Cassidy closed the folder. "Okay," she said, and opened another one. "So. We'll need a written letter of resignation, ideally with two weeks' notice."

"How much leave do I have left?" Iris asked.

"Okay," Scott said. "Wait. I know it feels like - "

Cassidy consulted something. "You have sixteen hours sick time, and seventy-five hours of vacation. That works out to a little over two weeks, combined."

"Can I take those starting now and submit my resignation for the end of that time?"

Cassidy's eyes softened for the first time, looking more human and less like a corporate machine. "Yeah. I think under the circumstances, we can make an exception." She made a note to herself. "You'll also need to remove all personal property from your desk, any personal files from your computer, and turn in your badge and any building or office keys to me before you leave today."

"Wait," Scott said. "Wait, wait. Iris. You're having a tough time. I can see it. I've been seeing it since January. But don't do anything you'll regret, okay? You're an excellent reporter. Don't just throw that out. Why don't you take the two weeks, and then make up your mind?"

"Scott - " Iris said.

"We'll take your resignation, but we just won't file it or something." He raised his brows at Cassidy. "Right? We can do that. We'll hold it until you let us know in a couple of weeks. What about that?"

"Nothing's going to change."

"I get that it feels like that now," he wheedled, "but you'd be surprised how some time away can clear your - "

"Scott," Iris said, looking him dead in the eye. "Nothing's going to change."

Scott, who'd heard that note of firmness in her voice before, sagged with defeat.

Iris got to her feet. "Okay," she said, mostly to Cassidy. "Letter, removal of personal property, badge and keys. Right?"

"That's everything I need," Cassidy said.

“Okay. Scott?”

He looked up at her, his eyes sad. In a heavy voice, he said, “I'll need all your notes on current stories and any rough drafts so i can assign them out to other reporters."

Iris nodded and looked at the clock. It was barely one. She was supposed to take her lunch. She decided not to. She had a lot to do this afternoon and she wasn't hungry anyway.

She was never hungry anymore.

"I hope things improve for you, Ms. West," Cassidy said, shuffling her folders together and getting up.

"Thanks," Iris said. West-Allen, God!

But that wasn't her name. That wasn't ever going to be her name.

Scott stood. "I'm really sorry," he said. "This wasn't the way I was hoping this would go."

"I know," Iris said.

"Even at half-power, you're a better reporter than people who've been doing this for decades," Scott said. "We'll hire you back anytime."

Cassidy made a strangled noise, visions of lawsuits no doubt dancing in her head. Iris could have told her not to worry. She didn't see herself coming back, much less kicking up a fuss if she didn't get the promised job.

She was grateful for the walls of her cubicle, which hid the activity of pulling out drawers and putting things into a storage box to take home. She pulled several folders out, flipping through them, printing out preliminary notes and rough drafts from her computer. She would give these to Scott. He probably wouldn't be surprised that none of them were as far along as they should be.

A few times, when other reporters spotted what she was doing, she had to stop and explain, and endure their exclamations and wheedling. Like Scott, they seemed to think that she really just needed a vacation to regain her edge, her drive, her verve.

But her life since January had ground edge, drive, verve down like a belt sander. No vacation was going to restore her. Only one thing could do that.

They went away and whispered to the other reporters, and she could feel the news spreading, like dye in water. A few more people came over and expressed regret or surprise, giving her their phone numbers or personal emails. She took them although she had no intention of getting in touch.

It should have reassured her that she hadn't burned all her bridges with her flakiness lately, but it felt even worse. More people she was disappointing.

Some people were less kind. They said the same things as the others, but there was a sub-layer of malice and insincerity. Some didn't say anything to her at all. The top of the heap wasn't always the best place to be.

Iris found that she was fine with both.

She found her "weird file," where she saved any mention of anything strange or off-kilter just in case it played out later. Although it was intended for CCPN stories, she felt no qualms over sending it to her personal stick drive. She also saved as many contacts as she could. She was losing access to a lot of murmurs and mutters and overheard conversations that got delivered to Star Labs as well as being written up for CCPN's pages. She was going to have to keep up somehow.

When the clock hit four-thirty, her desk was neat and bare, all the folders dropped off in Scott's empty office. She typed up an email to Scott and Cassidy, a formal resignation in two or three lines that cited "personal reasons" without going into further detail. She tapped out another quick email to the whole newsroom - "personal reasons" again - and adding a thank-you for the work she'd done with them. It felt stiff and rote, overly formal without any warmth or sincerity behind it. But she couldn't work out how to do it better.

As she hit send on the email, restarted her computer for the last time, and picked up her box of personal effects, she felt part of the weight easing off her shoulders. For a moment, she wondered if she'd done the right thing.

But no. The Iris West who'd been happy, fulfilled, and productive here wasn't her anymore. That was an old life, one with Barry in it, one without the crushing weight of running Star Labs and keeping Central City safe. She didn't belong here anymore.

Maybe one day, she could again.

Maybe one day she might be happy again.

Maybe one day.

FINIS

#Iris West #fanfiction #mosylufanfic lives up to her damn name #angst #4x01 reaction #(although really it takes place during the hiatus)#the flash

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michellelinkous · 4 years

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‘It’s a total God thing’

The words came from a physician more than 600 miles from home. But to the Rice family, it seemed to be revealed by God himself.

Greenville parents Libby and Eric Rice believe God helped break the news of their son’s diabetes diagnosis last year and let them know things were going to be OK.

It took a 2019 trip to Tennessee for them to hear it clearly.

“It was a slow, steady unveiling,” Libby said. “It took us being on vacation to just have it say, ‘Here it is.’”

Nolan, a Greenville High School freshman, was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes July 4, while on a family vacation in the Smoky Mountains.

He remains positive despite the life-changing diagnosis that requires him to continually count carbohydrates, monitor his glucose level and inject himself with insulin four times a day.

He jokes about going to Tennessee and “catching the diabetes,” saying it in his best southern accent.

“It’s one of those things that just kind of happens and you don’t know why it happens, it just does,” Nolan said. “I can’t do anything now, so I might as well joke about it from here on out.”

Nolan’s mother, Libby, started wondering if something was wrong with Nolan months earlier. “My mom radar had been going off for a couple of months,” she said. “He had been feeling funny, and he’s the kid who doesn’t complain about anything.”

She noticed subtle changes in March. Losing weight, Nolan seemed somewhat lethargic and wasn’t acting like himself. She tried to chalk it up to puberty. Then he almost didn’t want to go on his eighth grade East Coast trip in early June.

“I was miserable the whole time,” Nolan said. “I kept on saying, ‘I don’t feel good, I think I’m sick.’”

“But he had no symptoms of being sick,” Libby said. “He wasn’t feverish. There was nothing. He still ate, he was just contrary, unhappy, unsettled.”

“The first picture somebody sent me I just started bawling, because he looked miserable,” Libby said. “I was upset because I thought he was unhappy there.”

Once home, Nolan said he continued to feel bad, but couldn’t pinpoint why. “It’s really hard to describe,” he said. “I just felt thirsty all the time. Stuff tasted a lot different.”

Can I get a hallelujah?

After being home for two weeks, the family left June 30 for a week-long vacation to Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. The first two days they hiked in the Smoky Mountains, and Nolan said he felt lightheaded and couldn’t really feel his legs.

“I just figured he was in really bad shape,” his father, Eric, joked.

“We had noticed how much he was drinking,” Eric said. “It was a blessing we were on vacation, because we don’t spend 24 hours a day with him normally, so we didn’t know he was drinking 25 glasses of water a day until we were on vacation.”

After a day of rest July 3, the plan for Independence Day was to go to Dollywood Theme Park.

Nolan awoke that day and said he didn’t feel well, and then proceeded to pour and drink three glasses of milk, one after the other.

Concerned, Eric called their family pediatrician’s office. After listening to Eric describe Nolan’s symptoms, the on-call doctor encouraged them to take him right away to East Tennessee Children’s Hospital, a journey of about 45 minutes.

They canceled their Dollywood plans and drove to the Knoxville hospital.

“Within about 15 minutes of being there, they told us he had Type 1 diabetes,” Eric said. “All they had to do was a simple urine test.”

A faith-filled family, the Rices see God’s hand in how the diagnosis presented itself.

While driving around in Tennessee, they kept hearing a contemporary Christian song called “Raise a Hallelujah” by Bethel Music. The song’s message speaks of giving praise in the face of life’s storms. The songwriter felt inspired when praying for the young children of friends as they fought for their lives after contracting E. coli.

That wasn’t the only sign of divine timing.

Nolan’s nurse in the emergency department that day, also named Eric, played baseball and the guitar—just like Nolan. And he also learned he had Type 1 diabetes as a youth.

“It’s a total God thing,” Libby said. “It’s crazy,” she said, choking back emotion.

“He totally got it,” she said of the nurse. “He was the person. It’s like we were supposed to go there. That day. That shift. That hospital. All of it.”

Nolan allowed only a moment of self-pity, then learned to give himself insulin injections, something he’ll now have to do every day for the rest of his life.

“Nolan was a rock star,” she said.

“They started treating it immediately, and he felt better immediately,” Eric said. He gained 11 pounds overnight just being hooked up to an IV.

A two-day stay in the hospital included a lot of learning, with nurse educators showing Nolan and his family how to check blood sugar, how to count carbohydrates, properly calculate doses and give injections.

“It was a real whirlwind education,” Eric said. “All of a sudden we need to treat his diabetes. It was scary leaving the hospital. We had never counted carbs. It was the unknown and the fear of messing it up.”

But again, the song seemed to speak to the family, saying everything would be all right.

“Leaving the hospital, we got in the car and that song was on again, for cripes’ sake,” Eric said laughing.

And once home, they heard it again—live. The family attended a Praise in the Park event in Rockford where Greenville Community Church performed “Raise a Hallelujah,” now deemed Nolan’s song.

“You can’t make this up,” Libby said. “It’s just crazy, absolutely crazy how it all happened.”

Now, months later, they continue to learn and fine-tune how to best regulate Nolan’s blood sugar levels.

‘It’s math all the time’

Nolan has taken ownership of monitoring his blood sugar and counts grams and carbs in food before he consumes each meal, giving himself an insulin injection to counteract the food.

Nolan wears a continuous glucose monitor on his arm and takes what they’ve dubbed his “bug-out bag” with him everywhere, equipped with fruit snacks, a glucagon pen, insulin and glucose tabs.

Each evening at 9:30 p.m., a longer-lasting dose is given to keep his glucose levels in a safe range until morning. They try to elevate his blood sugar level to about 120 mg/dL, however his normal level is around 85-90.

“Getting him to 120 for bed is impossible, so he has ice cream,” Libby said. “I was giving him Frosted Flakes at 12:30 a.m. the other night.”

While she’s at peace with her son’s diagnosis, Libby still feels anxiety.

“Every single night about 9:30 p.m. I start to get uncomfortable,” she said. “You just have to make sure he’s going wake up in the morning, every single time you put your 15-year-old to bed.”

“It’s trial and error and it changes all the time,” Libby said. “It’s math all the time.”

“He does fantastic with it. I’m super proud of him,” Eric said. “I just wish I could give him a break. It’s a 24-hour-a-day disease that you can’t take a break from. You can’t take a day off.”

Despite this, having Type 1 diabetes hasn’t stopped Nolan from his favorite activities, and he can eat what he wants—he just has to plan and dose for the upcoming meal.

“He’s just a normal kid,” Libby said. “He’s just got this thing.”

Nolan is getting ready to try out for the baseball team this spring. He’s busy with school and practicing the guitar. He likes to hunt, fish and ride snowmobiles. He attended his first high school dance last fall. All normal teenage stuff.

Nolan’s sister, high school senior Kirsten, has been impressed with her younger brother.

“He’s handing it all really well,” she said. “But I feel like I’ve become a whole lot more protective of him, especially at school.”

“The reality is people are dealing with a lot of worse things than we are; he can live a totally normal life,” Eric said. “We just try to keep that in perspective.”

Nolan is doing well managing the disease in part because of his personality, his parents said.

“Maybe he’s the inspiration for doing what the doctors tell you to do, because he’s a rule follower,” Libby said. “When you do that, it works.”

Spectrum Health Helen DeVos Children’s Hospital endocrinologist Donna Eng, MD, agrees.

“Nolan has handled his diabetes care in stride and has not let it slow him down,” Dr. Eng said. “He is an exceptional young man with an outstanding attitude.”

Nolan shrugs off concerns. “It’s not a thing unless you make it a thing,” he said.

Especially, as his mother said, “it’s a total God thing.”

‘It’s a total God thing’ published first on https://smartdrinkingweb.tumblr.com/

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gordonwilliamsweb · 4 years