20 Questions You Need to Ask a VRBO
The hottest new trend in springtime travel is a holiday-themed stay in a quaint New England village. But whether it’s Easter, May Day, Walpurgisnacht, what have you, there are some key details you need to discuss with your VRBO host.
Here’s what you should ask.
1. How many forbidden wells or ponds are on the property?
2. Is there a divining or hocusing fee?
3. Are your stone circles monitored, and are they handicap accessible?
4. Do the spirits in the attic understand American Sign Language?
5. Can we use gasoline-powered equipment or vehicles (combustion engine) to make our own stone circles?
6. May we address your corn growers by their first names?
7. What logo tones and RF frequencies, if any, should we use to “voice” the electromagnetic fields along trails?
8. Do we share “sightings” directly with the town council, or can we just tell the belfry watchman?
9. If we are jet-lagged or road weary upon arrival, can we skip the first Gathering? What about the first Summoning? The Awakening?
10. Will the humming sounds and glowing in the orchard stop after 10 PM?
11. Can you hear my thoughts?
12. Are we allowed to make eye contact with the horses and cats?
13. Are your trees "friendly?"
14. Do we really have to give the old blind woman at the covered bridge three silver coins every time we cross, or can we Venmo that?
15. Why does the compass on my cell phone always point to your barn?
16. Who handles blessings/prayers for our first day with the livestock, in case that goes south?
17. Do you supply the necessary chalk figures, life-size corn dollies, and swords for the Friday night thing? If not, are rentals available in the village?
18. To whom do we report children?
19. Are we allowed to communicate with the swarm, should the occasion arise?
20. Is there any decent pizza in the area and do they deliver?
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Leftovers of stuffing and wild rice added to tonight’s dinner of turkey legs and thighs tonight at Abalone Bay. We brought out the holiday plates and our collection of abalone trees. My son believes holiday turkey should have 6 legs! #dinner #dinnerisserved #holidaysarehere #holidayseason #turkey #turkeyleg #turkeylegs #pfaltzgraffwinterberry #holidayplates #vacationrentalbyowner #vacation #vacationvibes #vacationrental #airbnb #airbnbhost #airbnbsuperhost #vrbo #bookdirect #searanch (at Sea Ranch Abalone Bay) https://www.instagram.com/p/ClnUjQdr4dR/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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