#whew this ended up way longer then i meant for it to be

[straykids-97]

Undone

Sins cannot be undone, only forgiven. - Igor Stravinsky 

Synopsis- Chan appreciates art. Sometimes it’s music, and sometimes it’s hearing you say his name. 

Warnings: soft!dom chan, unprotected sex, teasing, pet names (angel face, channie, baby doll) fluff haha... Pls, let me know if I forgot anything! 

Minors don’t interact! Reader’s discretion is advised!! 

Word Count: 1.2k

You can’t help but watch Chan, completely enthralled by his ethereal movements. He seemed to move with an eerie fluidity, that made your skin crawl, but for all the right reasons. Chan fell to one of his knees, rolling his hips forward and quickly moving to the next move. You decide that that was enough, and you quickly turn off the tv, not wanting to keep watching your boyfriend. You were already flustered enough as it was, and he wouldn’t be home for hours. It was best to try and focus on something different. 

You decided to detox by making something to eat and passing the time by taking a short shower. What was supposed to be less than 5 minutes, ended up being way longer. You should have known better than to sit on the floor, you had a terrible habit of getting too comfortable and then not coming out for hours it seemed. Your mind was still fuzzy from seeing Chan dance in his tight compression shirt. You saw him in much less but the thought of knowing what was underneath it all made it worse. “Get a grip.” you grumble to yourself as you stand to your feet. Honestly, it was sometimes embarrassing how easily he got under your skin, but he loved it. And often used it against you. 

You didn’t know how long you had been in the shower until you heard a knock at the door. You gasped, holding your chest; had you been in the shower for that long? “Angel face?” Chan chirped from the door, “Are you ok? You didn’t say anything? Did you fall asleep?” His voice was full of worry, making you smile, “I’m ok. Just lost track of time. I didn’t even hear you.” You admitted, peaking your wet face out of the shower. His face turned to your much lower one. A grin spread across his face, “Ah. Got too comfy, hmm?” You saw that he was wearing dark sweats and his favorite hoodie. 

“Well, scoot over.” he shooed you, pulling his clothes off. You giggle and slide into the shower again, scooting forward to allow him some space. “Whew. It’s hot in here.” He teased, sinking to the floor of the shower before pulling you into his cool body, making you yelp. “Ah! You’re so cold!” 

“Well, come warm me!” He growled playfully, nipping at your neck. You giggled as he wrapped his arms around your torso, “Did you watch?” He asked, making you nod, “Yes.” You trailed off for a moment, making him nudge you, “but?” 

“I didn’t watch for long…” 

“Awe, why? Too boring?” You shake your head, “No! No.” He chortled at your words, “Oh? Then what was it?” Your cheeks heated up. He knew exactly what you meant, but he wanted to hear you say it. “Channie,” you plead, not wanting to say it because you were too embarrassed, “Yes?” He purred, making you become more flustered. “You know why.” You grumble, “Do I?” He rumbled, squeezing you a little harder, making you squeak. “Yes!” 

“I do? I don’t think so. How could I know what goes on in that pretty little head of yours?” He hummed. “Tell me, and I may let you go.” 

“You looked good…” You trail off, “And?” he pressed his nose to your neck, “I couldn’t watch.” You whimper as his fingers trail down your stomach to your hips. “Why?” he was breathless, waiting for the right moment to attack. “I was getting… bothered by you.” his forefinger strummed against your core, making you mewl. Your head lulled to the side and Chan followed, lips latched on your neck, “really?” 

“Channie,” you whimper, “don’t tease.” 

“Am I teasing?” He asked, making you whine. “Chan, please.” he chuckled once, running his finger down until he was inside you. You gasp, holding his knee. You were too worked up to realize that Chan had you pinned until your fingers were digging into his thighs, you didn’t know you were utterly at his disposal. “Please.” You pleaded as he teased your core. “Please, what? Baby doll, I’ll give you the world, all you have to do is ask.” You shuddered and lean your head against his chest. “Fuck me, please.” he paused, his heart skipping a beat at your request. 

He wasted no time twisting you around so that you were facing him. Chan gripped your face, pulling yours to his; lips smashed together in a hot panting mess, he pulled you into his lap. He made you straddle his hips, and you melt against his chest. Chan’s hands run the expanse of your body; his left hand was pressed against your shoulders and the right guided your hips onto his length. You both moan into each other’s mouths, “I don’t think I could ever get used to his.” he groaned, his mouth hanging open against yours as he gently thrust up into you. You whined, gripping his shoulders, knowing to not hold him too hard; bruises were frowned upon by the company. 

After adjusting, he began to thrust harshly into you. Leaving you a mess of pleas, whimpers, and gasps, his mouth was open in awe as he held the nape of your neck, his pupils blown out with lust and desire. He held your hips, Chan’s fingers digging into your skin, “You’re mine?” He groaned, making you nod frantically. His palm met the skin of your ass, making you let out a shrill whine, “Yes! All yours!” You cried, holding his shoulders as his speed picked up, the shower cabin filled with moans and slapping skin. “Channie!” You mewled, begging him for release as the familiar feeling tightened in the pit of your stomach. “Oh, say my name, please.” He moaned, thrusting harder. You throw your head back, “Chan, Chan, please.” Chan pressed his face between the valley of your breasts, holding onto your body as if he was afraid that you would disappear. “Oh, y/n.” He mumbled, kissing his way back to your mouth as he held you. 

You moaned, holding his neck as you come undone, “Chan!” You cried, feeling his hips stutter against yours. He let out a throaty moan and stilled, panting into your chest for a moment. You both remained in that position for a short while before Chan curled you into his lap, brushing your hair from your eyes. “Was that better than the dance?” He teased, making you sleepily giggle. “As always, yes.” He chased your face and pressed kisses all over your neck and face. You couldn’t help but giggle at him as he held you closer. “I’ll never let you go, y/n.” 

“Oh? Should I be worried?” You tease him. “Slightly.” He grinned, pressing a sweet kiss to your lips. 

Sorry, I haven’t really been motivated to post anything lately! I’m working on my novel so I’ve been trying to focus on doing that. But, here we are! I hope you all enjoy! Also, my DMs are open for drabble requests as well! Feel free to stop by and drop a hot word about any member of either Skz or Ateez! (working on some Ateez stuff atm as well :)

©️straykids-97

#bang chan hard thoughts #bang chan smut #bang chan hard hours #bang christopher chan #skz smut #skz drabbles #stray kids hard thoughts #stray kids hard hours #stray kids smut

[lovingherrscher]

Their reactions to your "It's the first time someone told me not to die."

Ft: Dazai Osamu, Nakahara Chuuya, Fyodor Dostoevsky

Warning: mention of suicide and violence, hint of suicide attempts (reader, Dazai), Chuuya being an affectionate drunkass, slight guilt-trip in Fyodor's part.

Notes: Based on personal experiences. A little self-indulge. Chuuya's part came out longer than I expected whew-

Best with:

Phantom - HI3 (Dazai's part)

Inherit - HI3 (Chuuya's part)

Storm - HI3 (Fyodor's part)

(*) - Honkai 4.8 trailer

(**) - Honkai 5.0 trailer

(***) - Honkai 4.1 trailer

Dazai

An empty shell expecting the first ray of dawn (*)

He was surprised, to say the least. It reminds him of how most member of the ADA reacts to his suicide attempts (ch 2)

Dazai is smart enough to notice how his friend, who's now his s/o has been feeling down lately. You don't talk as much as you did before, you doesn't focus on your work or what he said most of the time, how the dark circles under your eyes increasing.

So one night, he took you out to your, and also his comfort place - Lupin. After a few drinks, when your sober state has long gone, he finally broke the silence and asks you what happened.

You have been having a hard time lately, but it isn't work that's worrying you. Everyone in the ADA treats you really good, it's just that you can't stop the negative thoughts flooding your mind.

"Hey, I've been thinking about your invitation. I think I might go with you."

"My, you're really funny~ We've been going out for quite a while already!"

"No, I meant when you asked me to join you for a double suicide. I think I'm ready now, Osamu."

His heart suddenly drops. You're joking, right? You were the one makes him wanted to live, even just a little longer so he can be with you. And now you're telling him that you want to throwaway your life? Dazai's words came out like he was on autopilot,

"Don't die. Please."

Dazai can't tell are you making a happy or sad expression right now as you smiled at those words.

"It's the first time."

What? No, no, no. Your first time? What first time? The Demon Prodigy in the past is now having a trouble understanding his drunk lover, how cute.

"The best I was told that, if that's what I've decided then they won't stop me anymore."

The fuck was that? Honestly, it kinda reminds Dazai of when Atsushi first join the Agency, and the newcomer was the only one helped him when he failed, what he claimed was a suicide attempts.

He suddenly pulls you in, embracing you tightly. He had lost someone important once. And he doesn't want to, doesn't intent to lose them again.

"I'll tell you as much as you want to hear. Just... Please. Don't leave me alone..."

His voice cracked, just like the strong facade you've been struggling to keep all this time. Clinging to him like a lost child, you cried as if you had never cried in your life.

Chuuya

When the darkness seized the long night,

Did it envisage its end at the hands of a shooting star? (**)

He's gonna flip the table for real. Man is pissed hearing that bullcrap.

No, he isn't mad at you. He is mad at himself for not paying attention to this sooner, and at those who didn't treat you the way you deserve to be.

He knew that you were from an abusive family, since he was the one picked you up from that hellhole you crawled out from.

Chuuya asked for a paid vacation so he can spend time with you, listening to you, take you out on dates, spoiling you rotten in the desperate hope that you'll feel better.

"Come again?"

"Chuuya, it really is the first time I was told not to die."

"If it was someone else I'd say that's a load of bullcrap... But it's you... I trust you."

When you started befriending Chuuya, you mention that you aren't interested in dating, and the ginger agreed on this. To you, it was the fear of an abusive partner, like how your parents turned out. To Chuuya, it was the fear of losing someone he loves. Whatever the reason is, you two had to make sure to yourself that you won't fall in love with the other.

He didn't fail to notice the bruises and fresh bandages you've been covering up on your arms every time you two hang out. When he asked what happened you told him that you fought with some thugs who picked on you, but Chuuya knew you were better than that. So he asked again and again, until you finally confessed it was because of your parents. When one party left, the only victim left was you.

Having no one you can crash on to hide, you had to suffer everytime they're in a bad mood. If lucky enough you'll be spare with one or two slap across the face, but if not... There was a time when they were drunk, and you were pinned against the wall with a knife against your throat. It was lucky that they didn't kill you at that point, for they claimed that they won't be able to sell a haunted house.

"Hey, don't die."

"Why of all sudden?"

"Dunno. Just feel like I want to say so. We're friends, right? Isn't that what friends should be doing?"

Everything still felt like an old dream to you, from the day you muttered up the courage to ask for help from Chuuya, to the day you finally moved in with him, and to the day he confessed to you.

Occasionally, when he gets a rare day off from the executive duty, Chuuya would enjoy his wine collection with you. He teaches you everything he knew, from the simplest thing like their names, what they're made of, how strong they are, to how you can tell the difference between one that's been aged well and one that isn't, or where can you get his favorite one, Pétrus.

Chuuya is known for his love to alcohol yet somehow can't tolerate it, so that night, when he took glasses after glasses, to the point he'd mistaken you with his ex-mentor, Kouyou.

"Ane-san, I know that I'd agreed with- hiccup! her that we aren't looking for something over friendship - hiccup!"

"But I just can't help it. She was so fragile, yet she still tries to carry all those burden by herself... I can't help but saw somewhat my mirror image in her... The way her fire won't go out no matter how hard we tried to extinguish it."

"I think I'm in love with her."

Your face flushed a deep shade of red hearing the not-so-indirect confession Chuuya gave you. That's how he truly thinks of you?! Whilst you were still panicking at the sudden confession, Chuuya was already out cold on the sofa, and if you listen closely, carefully, you can even hear him breathing. You smiled at the sleeping executive as you pull the blanket over his body. Maybe it's time you give love a chance it deserves.

Fyodor

But even the weakest amongst us fight to defend their faith and belief (***)

Let's be honest, this man? He doesn't look like the type to actually, be in a relationship, since he's too busy chasing his ideal world, the promised land.

But when he does? Hoo boy.

Honestly, he might be a little surprise hearing so, but the surprise look won't last past a second on his face.

Will sit down and listen to you, if the root of the problem is something he can fix, he'd offer to help you (without involving killing or, ehem, brainwashing anyone, hopefully...)

Fyodor's cold hand cupped your cheeks, his other free hand held your hand tightly, as a glance it seems to be an intimate act, yet his eyes scream the opposite. He rolls up your sleeve, revealing the new scars trailing from your wrist to your elbow.

"Myshka, mind telling me what is this?"

You can't remain silence forever, because if there's anything you've learnt, that neither lying or the silent treatment works with this man.

"Did you cut yourself again, (y/n)?"

You nodded. It couldn't be helped, old habit dies hard and you can't help but resort to the blade. What else can you do? Your beloved Fedya wasn't there for you, and the blade was whispering to you, to take it, and just one small slice should relieved you from whatever you're feeling. But one definitely wasn't enough as the blade carved you like a stone.

Fyodor let out a small sigh as he cradles you in his arms. He didn't wish for you to hurt yourself like this. Because he is the only one who can hurt you. Yet whenever he let you out of his sight, new scars would grew rapidly like mushroom.

"You know I never wanted to see you got hurt, right, malyshka? I'm very sad and disappointed."

Another nod. God, you feel so terrible. You shouldn't have done that. You don't want to disappointed him. When you realized, your head were leaning against the soft materials of his shirt, his coat wrapped around you like a blanket, his pale finger petting your soft hair.

"Don't die, my myshka."

Your eyes widened. "It's the first time someone had told me not to die..."

"I'll say as much as you want. Now, stay with me, will you?"

#yoha writes #bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai #bungo stray dogs dazai #dazai osamu #dazai osamu x reader #dazai x reader #bsd chuuya #chuuya x reader #bungou stray dogs chuuya #nakahara chuuya #chuuya nakahara #chuuya imagines #dazai x y/n #dazai imagines #fyodor x y/n #fyodor dostoevsky #fyodor x reader #bsd fyodor #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs

[omkookie]

Based on THIS Rio fic 🩷

Whew, this ended up becoming way longer than I intended it to be...😭

⌈ ⚠️ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ⌉ Yandere!Rio’s Misandry and manipulation, kidnapping + drugging. 15+ Not proofread.

“Okay, look. Listen to me.” He tells her while taking her cheeks into his large hands, and holding her face. “There is someone dangerous outside, and we need to be quiet.” His explanation confuses her, and she whispers in question, “Who is it?”

Satisfied with her calm response, he gently lets her face go. Then, he looks back at the door. “I’m not too sure.” He answers. She quirk a brow up at him, Wondering to herself if Rio was now a crazed lunatic or being genuine. 

Could he be telling the truth? Would there be any reason for him to tell her the truth? 

She asks herself what benefit there may be for him. There is honestly no benefit for him to be honest with her, He’s probably lying to keep her quiet. Maybe, he figured that if he lured her into thinking that there was someone dangerous outside she wouldn’t scream for help. 

She's never seen him like this, and she was afraid. For the first time in her life, she was afraid of HIM.  She was tied up. Her arms and legs were bound by thick ropes that were meant to prevent her from escaping. “Anyway, it’s alright, MC. Just be quiet.” He strokes her cheek with his gloved hand as if to comfort her, “I’ll take care of you now, and I’ll make sure that you never feel unsafe again!” His words scare her, and she tries to resist the urge to scream when he kisses her cheek. 

“Rio, please…” Her skin crawls when he kisses her. Despite that, he doesn’t look too bothered as he asks her, “Please what?”

“Please let me go!” She begs him.

He stares at her blankly, his poker face remaining completely neutral even when he sees the tears in her frightened eyes glistening. “Please don’t look so afraid.” He tries to calm her down, “I’ll untie you in a minute.” 

“Rio! Please just untie me already.” She musters a weak glare at him, trying to blink back her tears. “Why are you even doing this?”,  “Why?” He echoes, looking utterly confused by her question. “Because I love you.” He states simply. “You don’t love me! If you did, then you wouldn’t grope me while I sleep. You wouldn’t kidnap me either!” She retorts. 

Rio visibly grimaces, his hands tightening into fists for a moment as he considers her words. “Everything I’ve ever done was out of love.” He answers sharply before gagging her by tying a cloth around her head. “You tried reporting me to the police… But thankfully, they thought you were drunk because of how much you were slurring on your words.” He stands, and brushes off the dust left on his clothes by the crushed up pills he earlier drugged her with. As he gazes down at her he tells her, “I went through a lot of trouble to bring us here.” 

As tears run down her face, she closes her eyes shut, Hoping that this is all a nightmare she’ll wake up from.

…

A Camera?

Oh, how unfortunate! Did she not feel safe in the palace? Of course she didn't. She was surrounded by men. Men were disgusting, vile creatures. He knew just how terrible they can be, and just how much they must have scared her… Especially those Rhodolite princes. Rio's prejudice against his own kind astounds her, as well as his blatant misandry. How can he continue to rant and say such vile things about men? Seeing how deep his hatred ran made her uneasy…

And hearing Rio bash her friends, made her feel even worse. His manipulative tendencies were award winning… and even though she knows she shouldn’t listen to him, his words were slowly getting into her head. 

She snaps out of her thoughts when she hears Rio's voice, “We’ve been missing for so long that there are posters, as well as leaflets with our faces on them.” He says as he picks up the winter dress he bought her, and sets it down next to her before he brings his fingers behind her back to strip her. “At least, The police don’t think that I've kidnapped you or anything… I’m good friends with their chief. They surely think that something bad must have happened to us both.” The smile he flashes is so dazzling, so sickening. The fact that he was smiling innocently after kidnapping her and keeping her as a prisoner here was insane.

She doesn't know where she is either... She’s even lost track of time. 

All she knows is that there’s snow? So she’s no longer in rhodolite. What she doesn’t know however, Is that Rio has brought her to a far away country that shares borders with Achroite.

Rio strips her with a practiced hand, easily sliding her dress off of her before redressing her. She doesn’t fight against him, she knows better than to do so after countless tries, and he presses a chaste kiss to her forehead. “I’ll prepare dinner!” He says cheerily as he picks up her discarded clothing and heads towards the kitchen. 

Finally untied for the first time since being here, she gets up and walks over to the windows. She peers through the safety bars of the windows and feels a chill run down her spine as she observes the cold white snow. 

There was nothing but snow.

🩷 An: I think yandere Rio is like that one guy that everyone loves and respects, and so he would never be a suspect for anything bad.

Drugging the MC after she confronts him about touching him her like a creep is what I imagine he would do, because he doesn't want to 'hurt' her too much or do anything too forceful. The drugs would start taking place about half an hour after she sets out to go to the police in a carriage. Rio of course follows her and makes some excuses about her being drunk or something to the police officers since he's good friends with their boss. The police dismiss MC since they think she's spouting gibberish because of how she's slurring on her words. Oh, and they know she's good friends with Rio so she's safe with him. 💀

Poor MC y'all ✋😭

#ikemen prince #ikepri #rio ortiz #ikemen prince x reader #asks #ikemen prince fanfiction #ikeprince rio #ikepri rio #yandere fanfiction #yandere ikemen prince #yandere x reader #yandere #ikepri fanfic #cw;yandere❤️

[invisiblegarters]

I really hope it turns out like you said and we get a soap opera plot twist that Mew wasn't entirely honest about what happened with him and Ray, and that Top knew it because of the video.

It would be really interesting because neither of them seemed like they wanted to get physical with Ray or Boston, neither of them want to talk about it, and both are waiting for the other to speak up first because they know the other is keeping secrets.

I would really enjoy those parallels, but if it's not the case then I'll just enjoy Top being an idiot.

I have been thinking about this so much recently, you have no idea.

And the thing is, I hate feeling duped more than anything in the world. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. And I think that's what leads me to suspect Mew's motives, not necessarily because Mew himself as a character has done a thing wrong, but because I've ingested way too much of the theorizing and BTS and the interviews and the stuff people are posting form Den and Jojo on twitter (and whatever anyone says now they were having way too much fun with the wildest theorizing about Mew (this is not meant as a criticism - it was fun and frankly still is)).

There is something off about him. There is. And that sense of offness, so to speak, is what leads me to suspect everything he does. If he's duping someone I want to be in on the joke, not led along the primrose path with everyone else, you know? So I want to remain on my guard. They were also very very deliberate about how they gave us the reveal - letting us stew in Top's feelings for an entire week, then only showing the bare minimum of the video to let us know that something happened (and that Ray is still entirely caught up in his feelings about it) before only giving us the rejection once Mew is telling the story. It's asking us to choose to believe Mew right along with Top, and that's rough for me personally because I'm disinclined to trust this dude and I genuinely can't see how Top could be that angry over a video of a kiss that was taken two years ago. Also the way he kept questioning Mew about it - "you're sure it stopped at a kiss (paraphrased)" - makes me want to believe that what he saw was much more than a kiss.

But.

Everyone has to open themselves up to being duped sometime, and I guess this is my time. I am going to take a leap here and say that while the twist would be interesting, I no longer believe it's a real possibility. Whew. Now I've said it aloud, and because I am a walking jinx that's totally what's going to happen, lol. The parallels would be interesting, for sure, and it would make a twisted sort of sense if Mew were manipulating Top for his own ends.

I'm just not sure he is anymore. I feel like Mew is a person who is very used to being in control - as he told Ray, no one has ever made his heart tremble before. We see evidence of this all over the place, but especially with Ray himself - Mew can establish clear and firm boundaries with him because while he cares for Ray, he can also see him clearly, he can step outside of whatever emotion he feels when Ray is involved, analyze the situation, and act accordingly. He can push Ray away or give him lectures on consent (and frankly, good for him) because he's just not as involved as Ray is. Even if Ray had tried for more two years ago, I believe the dude we saw in this ep would have kindly but firmly rejected him.

But he's noticeably not quite able to do that with Top. He puts up boundaries and then concedes a little more ground every time they interact, because despite himself he is not seeing his relationship with Top as clearly as he's used to/expects to. I just don't think he's aware of that fact. Yet.

I don't want Top to be that stupid, but I suspect that it might be the case. Even while he was watching the video I was thinking to myself that it couldn't be long enough for sex (like even if they were the fastest two people in the world taking off clothes takes more time than what Top was watching allowed for). I just figured it had to be something because who would be that irritated over a stupid kiss that happened two years ago? I am now working under the impression that it was frustration with Mew holding him at arm's length combined with Boston dripping poison into his ears and Sand suddenly being around to remind him of what a shit he can be (and put the idea of how easy it may or may not have been to do the same thing to Sand at the forefront of his mind) and Ray's very poorly hidden pining (and the fact that from the outside it very much looks like Mew indulges it - until this ep it's what I thought too, I won't lie, and I had to eat my own words) all coming to a head. He's young, he's dumb, and he is a player himself so the one thing that you know he probably can't stand is the idea that someone is playing him.

I don't know, I'm in a weird place suddenly where I kind of want to root for every one of these dumbasses. Yes, even that one. :D Idk, this episode (and binge watching Gay OK Bangkok finally) just reminded me a little who we're dealing with. I've by no means seen the entirety of Jojo's oeuvre, but everything I have seen tells me that these people are going to be stupid and petty and they are going to make mistakes, they are going to be selfish and careless and hurt each other and themselves in the process - but they're going to do it in ways that resonate with someone, that feel real and are all the more painful for it.

This is a really roundabout and rambling way to say that I've changed my mind about Mew just from this one ep, lol. I hope I'm right, because I hate being wrong, but if I'm not I'll still enjoy the drama of it all.

#i really hope this made some sense #i do tend to ramble on and sometimes my point gets lost #asked and answered #only friends #only friends the series #mew ofts #top ofts

[tobiasdrake]

Time to make a choice, Yuma. Do we trust the wealthy stranger?

Yeah, my dude. Listen to Ghost Junko. The ravenous parasite who craves gory murder scenes knows what's up.

Nothing wrong with intel gathering. Just don't sign anything without reading the fine print.

Yeah, there's definitely something fishy about this guy. Especially given how intensely Shinigami's going, "DO NOT TRUST DO NOT TRUST", I get a strong impression that she knows something that she's not sharing.

This guy knows more about Number One than actual members of his organization do. There is definitely something fishy about him. Maybe he's what the "No Longer a Detective" bit in the title is about.

Is Makoto a retired Master Detective? Or something?

OR THAT. THAT COULD BE IT. THAT COULD DEFINITELY BE IT.

...

I threatened to throw Number One's son off of a skyscraper. Multiple times. Also, stabbing.

...

Between this and calling Halara a corporate shill over and over again, I am not ingratiating myself to the WDO very well at all.

Oh! Whew. Okay. My heart just about stopped there for a second.

You rotten, dirty bastard.

...it'd be funny if it turned out that Yuma is Number One's son, and Makoto was actually threatening us just now.

Oh, shit, it does. The text box doesn't convey it but he made a throaty "TCH" noise, like I just blindsided him with a question he was thoroughly unprepared to have to answer.

Makoto knows shit. He knows shit about Amaterasu, he knows shit about the WDO, and he knows shit about the homonculus experiments.

Urge to stab is rising again. I need to go look for the others before my murderboner gets the better of me.

Yo, is this guy Yuma's dad!?

Holy shit. Holy shit. No wonder he was so eager to talk about his cursed demon lineage.

Then again, another possibility is that he may have meant "successor" rather than "son". Shinigami was acting super cagey about this guy. She may have previously been partnered with him, if Makoto is the titular "No Longer a Detective".

Could also be both. Either way, what a line to end a conversation on.

#master detective archives: rain code #drake plays rain code #makoto kagutsuchi

[plastic-tulips]

@achapnamedtom tagged me to list 6 comfort films, it's also ages since I did one of these and I love listing anything so here we go!

Brief Encounter: what list of comfort films would be complete without a sad film to put on when you're feeling a bit fragile and want to enjoy a beautifully shot doomed romance amongst all the bits and bobs of a bygone era (the steam trains! the repressed emotions! the hats!)

We are the Best!: incredibly sweet and quietly realistic story about a trio of teenage punks in 1980s Stockholm. Wonderful naturalistic performances from the young cast makes me almost (almost!) nostalgic for my own early teens

Fantastic Mr Fox: I find the intentionally creaky handmade-ness of this film inherently comforting, especially the way the puppets' fur moves around like the 1930s King Kong. This was also the first thing I ever saw Jarvis Cocker in, so it's close to my heart for that reason too.

When Harry met Sally: yes the central tenet of this film clearly comes from a very different time but it's nonetheless an absolute treat, from the beautiful shots of autumn in New York to the believability of the relationship between the main characters. It's always on telly and I can never not watch it

Romantics Anonymous: what could possibly be more 'comfort film' than a story of two shy chocolate makers who are meant for each other but too afraid to say how they feel? It does that charming Gallic move of having a little musical number in the middle even though the film isn't really a musical, which I always find irresistible.

The Wicker Man: it's just so 70s and low-budget and unerringly odd that I can't help but be charmed by it. Even Christopher Lee's voice as he's sentencing Edward Woodward to get burned alive sounds soothing. I always give it a watch around springtime (May Day if possible) so it ties in with the general sense of renewal and optimism I think a lot of us feel around that time. RIP to Neil Howie but i'm different.

HONORARY MENTION goes to The Muppet Christmas Carol, not a comfort film in that I can stick it on at any old time of year but that little frog dressed as Tiny Tim makes me believe in the magic of Christmas every single year. Look at him.

whew this ended up being a lot longer than I planned but anyway I tag @rock-n-rollin-bitch @snookicoin @tautittology @britannia-hospital @iwatch-thebees and @veradune

#also don't feel like you have to write a mini essay like i did you can just do a list lol #tagged in

[aprillikesthings]

I lead part of EfM thing today (see earlier posts) and it went well ahhhhh thank God

and I've made my lunches for the next week!

and I'm munching on a salad

and all day I was looking forward to this, the moment I can (re)watch MORE SHE-RA

I've barely worked on my longer fic this weekend (other than copy/pasting a bunch of things Nate said after the show ended into the notes section of the doc) and tbh rewatching the ACTUAL SHOW is hella distracting bc with twenty eps left we're going to start getting into more of the really high-stakes stuff

Also, true story: I originally watched, like, the second half of season 4 and all of season 5 in two days of marathoning with Daci. So quite frankly? The last, like, third of the show is just kind of a blur to me now.

SO LET'S GO

s4 ep7 Mer-Mysteries

A mission in Dryl went badly, they've figured out someone's telling the Horde what they're doing, they're not tracking Adora because she wasn't even there--

YES

plz enjoy Sea Hawk's faces

Bow's sudden nervousness reminds me of when I was in line at the TSA in Dulles airport and was weirdly nervous. I had no reason to be nervous. AND YET. I'm usually totally fine at TSA? But the people at Dulles were scary!!!

(I was way less nervous coming back from Iceland, despite knowing I had Kinder Surprise Eggs in my suitcase. Which are actually illegal to bring into the USA. You can buy "Kinder Joy Eggs" in the USA, which do not have the toy, but the ones with the toys are against the law! Anyway I bought them for Daci. I was only nervous for a split second at customs in the USA bc they asked me what I'd brought home from Iceland and I was like...wool yarn. books. sweets (I'd also bought licorice and chocolate). But he just waved me through. WHEW.)

she's still big mad about this lolol

BUT she's right a spy IS the only thing that makes sense (but also the audience knows shit they don't)

Pearl?? A Pearl who knows too much?????

c'mon I had to

lolol they lampshaded the way lightning keeps striking when Mermista says something

to be fair she IS the most recent addition and the one they know the least

oh hey I also write everything in purple (or lavender) ink

lol

oh, shut up

well not this episode, specifically

LOLLLLL

honestly this is a lot like the DnD episode

so on the one hand, I know Flutterina is doing this to make them fight, but on the other hand Glimmer is right; on the other OTHER hand, I also would prefer a warning before being forced to see my abusive parent having free range of the castle I live in

BAHAHAHA I read Nate saying these two were interrupted on a date night, but also plz notice the colors of the flowers, it's literally most of the lesbian pride flag, they were SO unsubtle

The Ken from Plumeria is talking to the pastry chef from Dryl with the super cute outfit, and she looks bashful for a second after this screenshot; I am now shipping this and no one can stop me

speaking of ships (yes I know this isn't meant to be shippy lol)

a youtube video titled "it's raining on your window and you live in Bright Moon Castle ASMR for sleep 4 hours"

(....I'd listen to that)

(On a related note, mynoise dot net has a bunch of rain sounds on the website, and it also has an app--it's seriously the BEST website/app for ambient sounds because they're so adjustable and never repeat, and I just want everyone to know about them. The rain and ocean sounds are great on earbuds to cover up snoring so you can sleep!!! Worked better than my fancy earplugs while I was on the Camino and sleeping in all those hostels)

And back to the cartoon, where there's obviously suspicious shit happening because people seem to be in two places at once and their communications thing got shattered

oh so her name IS just The General

Flutterina (aka Double Trouble) has got to be like "oh my god wtf is up with this dude I cannot handle this bullshit"

Once again Glimmer proves that her and Catra are actually very, very alike

BUSTED

OOHHHHH they set up a trap I forgot, this is amazing

Adora: "we created a diversion :)" Glimmer: "You were a really good actress. For once."

pfft

Anyway Double Trouble is confessing the whole plan

:(

poor Mermista :(

there's a creepy-ass moment of seeing part of Horde Prime's face as he smiles, roll credits

#april rewatches spop #mer-mysteries

[valerie]

TMITL - the rest of December 2023

So it's 2024 now. Happy New Year! I have to go to work tomorrow, so must write and post this today. Here we go with the rest of December 2023 recap. https://flic.kr/p/2pmNNJa on the way to Reno In the middle of the month, we headed to Reno for another company party, Nevada style. We stayed at the El Dorado. The weather was chilly and crisp but clear and I was able to wear my longer coat. Nice! The party was fun-- the food was delicious, the company lovely, and the axe throwing entertaining. (I did not throw any axes.) https://flic.kr/p/2pmQYpP https://flic.kr/p/2pmRCR9 https://flic.kr/p/2pmRyip https://flic.kr/p/2pmTrgX https://flic.kr/p/2pmWjCy We only stayed in Reno for one night because my sister and her family came to visit! So we headed back home then visited San Leandro both days of the weekend. It was great spending time with everyone. Casual hanging out with family was just wonderful. We brought lumpia on Sunday and my dad cooked pancit. So good! https://flic.kr/p/2pndYyr https://flic.kr/p/2pn8ioX https://flic.kr/p/2pnd3ok https://flic.kr/p/2pmWsXd https://flic.kr/p/2pndZ3H https://flic.kr/p/2pncxUb https://flic.kr/p/2pnfgHX https://flic.kr/p/2pne9yN https://flic.kr/p/2pneHN4 https://flic.kr/p/2pnfgTG https://flic.kr/p/2ppqEqx I was so happy to see my sister and her family. Spending time in our childhood home with our parents and cousins was such a treat. These moments are much too few and far between but when they happen, they are special. I'm glad they came out to visit and I'm glad we were able to spend as much time as we did with them. https://flic.kr/p/2po7ueb The last week of work seems like so long ago now. It was finals week so school ended early, which meant it was quiet across the street by afternoon. Good times! My position was officially reclassified with the board meeting on December 13th! So very cool! I'm sure I'll be more impressed with my next paycheck. My work duties have expanded over the years and I'm glad that I finally got the nerve to submit for the the reclassification AND it was accepted. In years past, we used to have our quarterly luncheon on the last day of the semester but that hasn't happened properly since lockdown. Our building went to The Lounge for happy hour and it was a lovely way to end the semester. I feel fortunate to work with such a lovely group of people. https://flic.kr/p/2po89Kz https://flic.kr/p/2poD3HC I've been taking the days between Christmas and New Year's off and it's always THE BEST THING. It's the most restful time and the biggest stress I experience in that time period is cleaning the house for our annual inspection. Of course, I waited until the day before inspection to clean up and it was then I discovered that our vacuum wasn't working right. Alas! We ended up getting a new vacuum, which works quite well. https://flic.kr/p/2pp6xvM We watched the Niners game on Christmas Day at our favorite local. There was a fair amount of people there by the time the game started. It was a nice way to spend the game even if it didn't end the way we wanted. (They did better this past weekend, so whew!) https://flic.kr/p/2ppfJQp Most of my days off were super lowkey and wonderfully relaxing, especially with a clean house. It was easy to forget what day of the week it was and that's really one of my favorite things about being off and being at home. It's like practicing for retirement. ;) https://flic.kr/p/2ppTVps New Year's Eve (last night) was spent nearby at our friends' house. It was a casual time hanging out with a good group of people. There were kids abound so it no thankfully no crazy drunk people falling all over themselves. I'm too old for that kind of vibe. :P It was the best way to spend the last hours of 2023. We ended up heading home before midnight, which was fine. https://flic.kr/p/2ppSLTL I don't really have any resolutions for 2024 but how about some thoughts in bullet form: - Learning through Duolingo - I've been doing my Spanish lessons with Duolingo. I think I should commit to spending more time with each lesson. It's too easy to just do one bit and then go on with my day. Since I'm paying for it, I should really use it, eh? I started with French, which has been interesting. My goal, at some point, is to be able to watch shows in other languages and understand a bit more than I do now. I can understand some Spanish but definitely not the French. - Reading/listening more books - We have a book club at work and for our second book, I did the audiobook version. (Matthew Perry's Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing) I need to read more and audiobooks are a viable choice for me, especially when I'm taking my walks during lunch. I can also listen to books while I'm playing my mobile games. - Writing - I'd like to write more novels/novellas besides National Novel Writing Month. Is it a good thing to have started a new story right after I finished the November novel? Maybe, maybe not. Perhaps one day someone will read my works but for now, they're just for me. I also want to write more for my weekly posts. Do I need to make notes during the week? Do I need to start the post ahead of time? Should I make them simple sometimes with bullet points like this? - IRELAND - Our trip to Ireland is coming up! I need to start doing some research on what to do while we're there besides drinking Guinness at different pubs. I'm excited to see how much of dream Ireland matches with real Ireland. - Concerts - We have ONE concert for 2024 and it's not for Tyler Rich, so we definitely need to see him this year. We didn't see him at all in 2023, which is rather astounding. Our one concert so far this year is Jordan Davis (well, Luke Combs but I'm going for Jordan) at Levi's Stadium. I've never spent so much for concert tickets like I did for this concert. It better be a good one! - Social Media - I think Instagram and Threads are my go-to social media networks at the moment. I've been posting a bit more to Facebook as a result of posting more personal entries to IG. I still haven't figured out how I want to use Spoutible but they have been doing such a great job growing the platform. I think it's a dark horse in the social media landscape and I'm glad to be part of its beginning. https://flic.kr/p/2ppew9J On balance, 2023 was a good year. There were some highs and some lows but my mind seems to linger more on the good days than the bad. Even the sad moments like Nana's passing were balanced by the gathering of the family to remember her. I'm not one to write off a whole year like some people are wont to do. There are always good days and bad days and it's up to you on how you respond. I prefer to focus on the good times and the lessons learned from the bad times. Here's to a good start to 2024! Find your joy, my lovelies! Read the full article

#family #friends #luhsd

[lorei-writes]

Trials and Tribulations of an Unconsenting Time-Traveller

Part 21: The End

OC x Mitsuhide Previous Parts: Masterlist

Whew. Finally! The end! It is a short final chapter.

For a change, I actually feel relieved about finishing a series. I've definitely undertaken more than I could manage here. Nevertheless, it was an educational experience, so no regrets.

Content Warnings: major sacrifices

A hand reached towards her. Maria swallowed dryly as Mitsuhide patted her head.

Guide:

Characters in this story are assumed to be speaking few different languages. The following is assumed: normal dialogue notation = Japanese; dialogue written in italics = English. Any phrases not written in English will be put in the dictionary at the bottom of the work.

A hand reached towards her. Maria swallowed dryly as Mitsuhide patted her head.

“You liar,” she let out a bitter laugh. Lightning struck again. Her eyes began to prick, the man smiling at her with unusual tenderness.

“It was never meant to be, little mouse.” Mitsuhide rose to his feet. Hating him would make it easier on her, he was convinced.

He turned around. Left.

Mitsuhide was certain he did the right thing, regardless of any emotion the shouts chasing after him stirred.

***

The second time Maria travelled through time was not any less confusing than the first one. It was as if she ceased to be, as if she herself turned into that iridescent mist – and then she was already there, surrounded by commotion much too loud to be reasonable, her body smashing into the hard pavement below… At least partially, as something did cushion some of her fall.

“I’m sorry!” she shouted on instinct, several heads snapping towards her. Nevertheless, people averted their gazes the moment she stared back at them. A groan came from behind her.

“I’m so, so, so, so sorry!” Maria turned around, hands raised in front of her chest in an apologetic gesture. “Are you fine…?”

She barely managed to hold her jaw in place, a man lying flat on the ground. Considering that she did drop onto somebody, this much should not surprise her. However, the longer she looked, the more stunned she grew, a head of black hair shaking before he sent a glance towards her. His clothes, the unmistakeable confusion written over his face, eyes opened wide as he took in the people around, houses, cars, lights – Maria put her hand on his shoulder.

“Who are you?” she asked. The man, however, ignored her.

“Where are we?” was all he said.

“Future.”

“Future…?” he echoed, his gaze fixated on her as she got up. Maria brushed the dust off her clothes. She was no less determined than she was embarrassed – nevertheless, she did not falter, and approached the first person passing by them.

“Emm… Excuse me, what year is it now?” she asked, perhaps a bit shyly.

“Twenty-ten.” The woman did not even look her way, the pace at which she walked only increasing. Not that Maria could blame her. It wasn’t often that a stranger, a foreigner no less, with a scar on her face would walk up to you, all to ask about something so outlandish. Her shoulders slumped, she returned to the man.

“Future. Twenty-ten,” she reported back to him. “Your name?”

“Kicho.”

“Kicho… Kicho…” she repeated. It sounded vaguely familiar… “Sengoku?”

“Who even are you?”

“Emm… I… I’m a maid from Azuchi. Probably.” Maria cleared her throat. “Not here. We need to talk.”

“Why here…?”

“Not here!” she groaned, mildly aware of the fact that it could be taken the wrong way. “Not now. Move.”

She got up and left without any explanations – and soon enough, he followed after her. Truth be told, she was not sure how to explain that what they were sitting on was an asphalt road, and that if they were unlucky enough, they’d end up being run over by this very fast, very heavy thing called “car”. Language barrier was a dreadful thing, indeed.

***

The key turned inside the lock. Maria pushed the door open. She stepped inside and set her shoes by the entrance, a bag of groceries in her hands. Without thinking of it much, she put it on the counter. The apartment was small, if not simply overcrowded, a miniscule kitchenette connecting with a dining space.

“Kicho?” she called quietly, only to be answered by silence. She glanced towards the clock. It made perfect sense. It was too early for him to be back from work. Her arms felt unusually heavy as she slid the bedroom door open. It was tidy, or as tidy as it could be – Kicho wasn’t one to leave mess behind. She, on the other hand… Recently, she couldn’t force her mind to even consider cleaning. Slowly, she walked towards a small table, and reached for a sheet of paper. Writing wasn’t her strong side, but she had to try just regardless.

Several years had passed since her return from the past. Maria… She suspected she wouldn’t make it back from Kyoto. At the same time, however, she was nearly certain the night didn’t unravel in accordance with Mitsuhide’s plan. Perhaps it was truly fated for things to end this way. After all, she did let her anxieties rule her, and took her phone, documents and wallet on the trip.

Maria turned the lights on. It started to get dark. She reached for her passport – it was issued yesterday, although this yesterday had happened a long time ago now. Her eyes faltered as she looked at her phone. She clicked the record button.

“Hej! Proszę, wysłuchaj mnie do końca zanim usuniesz to wideo,” she stared to talk. Her hands trembling, she opened her passport and showed it to the camera. “To twój paszport, prawda? Ten sam PESEL, ta sama data urodzenia, zdjęcie, nawet numer seryjny. Odebrałaś go dzisiaj, koło czternastej, jeśli dobrze pamiętam. Poszłaś potem na kawę i do księgarni, ale niczego nie kupiłaś. Ja… Wiem, że to zabrzmi jak jakiś obłęd, ale wiem to wszystko, bo jestem tobą. I musisz, ale to musisz mnie posłuchać.

“Na początku dwa tysiące dwudziestego roku wybuchnie pandemia. Zostaniecie wprowadzeni w lockdown na początku marca – ja wiem, to samo w sobie już jest nie do pomyślenia. Ale przysięgam, nie kłamię. To wideo możesz zobaczyć tylko dlatego, że mój telefon i twój telefon to tak naprawdę jedno i to samo urządzenie, połączone z tą samą chmurą. W kwietniu mama zostanie okradziona. Koniecznie zmieńcie hasło do jej konta bankowego przed pierwszym dniem kwietnia. Cokolwiek co nie jest datą urodzin Fafika, proszę.”

Maria set her hands down. She looked straight into the camera, her face a mixture of sorrow and relief.

“Choć… W sumie nie wiem jak dużo mogę powiedzieć o tym, dlaczego w ogóle tutaj jestem,” she laughed. “Za parę lat wyruszysz do Japonii. Koniecznie odwiedź Kioto. A potem… Sama zobaczysz. To… To był drugi czerwca dwa tysiące dwudziestego piątego roku. Po prostu pojedź wtedy to Kioto. Może ciężko mi zaufać, ale stanie się wtedy naprawdę wiele ciekawych rzeczy. Spotkasz wspaniałych ludzi, przeżyjesz parę przygód… I nieważne co się stanie, gdy już tam będziesz – będziesz wiedzieć czym jest “tam” jak już się tam zjawisz – nieważne co, nie zbliżaj się do Kioto ponownie. Uwierz, że wszystko co dzieje się wokół ciebie jest prawdziwe od razu, nie popełniaj mojego błędu… I naprawdę, będzie cudownie.”

Maria hit the stop button. She uploaded the file to the cloud, fully aware that it would transfer to the other device connected to it – her phone, the one she held in her hand, but not exactly that one.

Kicho returned maybe an hour later. She didn’t tell him a word of what she had done. As on any other day, they started to prepare dinner. Her body felt heavier, but Maria ignored it. She was half-done with her meal when her hands refused to cooperate.

“Hm? You’re not hungry?”

“You could say that.”

Kicho furrowed his brows. “This doesn’t sound like you.”

“Say, Kicho.” Maria hung her head low. “Do you remember the date?”

“The date?”

“When we can return.”

“The second of June, twenty twenty-five. Why?”

“I promise I will be in Kyoto then.”

His fingers tapped against the table.

“What are you going on about? Aren’t we going together?”

“I think the other me has already seen my message,” Maria laughed. She smiled, her body slowly growing translucent. He stared at her with wide eyes.

“Why?”

“I’ve… I’ve realised there is a chance it will change the past.” She looked up abruptly. She knew how to hold her tears back. This time, she would not cry. “I don’t want to disappear either. But I wouldn't be able to live if I didn’t take the risk and tried to save her… In a way, I still will be alive… So… Please, take care of the other me when you meet her.”

“Maria –”

“Please.”

She disappeared. Not even dust remained.

Dictionary:

“Hej! Proszę, wysłuchaj mnie do końca [...]" - "Hey! Please, listen until the end of the video before you delete it. This is your passport, isn't it? The very same PESEL number, the very same birthdate, photo, even serial number. You've received it today, around 2PM, if I recall correctly. You've had coffee and went to a bookshop afterwards, but you haven't bought anything. I... I know it will sound like some insanity, but I know this everything because I am you. And you have, you absolutely have to listen to me. // "A pandemic will erupt at the beginning of 2020. You'll be in lockdown, starting from the beginning of March -- I know, that alone is hard to imagine. But I swear, I am not lying. You can only see this video because my phone and yours are in fact the same device, hooked up to the same cloud service. In April, somebody will steal from mom. You have to change password to her banking account before the 1st of April. Anything that isn't birthday of Fafik [common dog name], please. // "Although.. I actually don't know how much I can tell you about why I'm even here. In several years, you'll depart to see Japan. You must visit Kyoto. And then... You will see for yourself. It... It was the 2nd of June, 2025. Just come to Kyoto then. It may be hard to trust me now, but many interesting things will happen then. You'll meet wonderful people, you'll live through several adventures... And no matter what happens, when you will be there -- you will know where is this "there" once you are there -- no matter what, do not come near Kyoto again. Believe that everything what happens around you is real from the very start, do not repeat my mistake... And really, it will be wonderful."

// Final notes:

I don't think this ending is necessarily bad, to be honest. It just means she'll go trough a similar loop, although this time, hopefully, to see a different conclusion.

The alternate ending was for Mitsuhide to help her out of the wormhole. A short time-skip would occur, less than a month. Maria would be shown running errands in Azuchi. Her last errand of the day would relate to Mitsuhide, and so, she'd visit his manor. As it would turn out, their relationship was still rather ambiguous, although it would have clear romantic tendencies -- the sort of thing you ease to rather than are struck by. She'd end up working by his side, helping mostly with the security of Azuchi itself and collecting intel... And we can assume that this may be the ending she'd arrive on with the information she had given to her former/current self.

In a way, this perhaps is even happier than what could have been.

The End

Tag list: @bestbryn @xarexraven

#mitsuhide akechi #ikesen mitsuhide #ikemen sengoku mitsuhide #ikesen #ikemen sengoku #ikemen series

[calliopecalling]

QOTS Rewatch - 5x04 - La Situacion

This episode isn't quite as hard for me to rewatch as 5x03 is, something about the scale of Teresa's moral failings isn't quite as severe as last episode, but it feels somehow out of place in the rest of the season and it's taken me a year to really figure out how to make sense of Teresa's character journey such that this episode actually makes sense to me. When you read my original debrief after watching live you can see I was clearly like ... wtf was that? What is going on with Teresa and what are they doing with her character? I've made sense of a lot of it now (and kind of processed it ad nauseam in my gifset reblog tags) but this is still in my opinion perhaps the weakest episode of the season.

I don't have a WHOLE lot to add to that original debrief, honestly. I think I captured it all pretty well and I'm still not entirely sure what the queenpin takeaway was. I know I keep saying that it would've made more sense for her journey to just be towards this chillier, stonier, inaccessible white queen rather than going down this snappy, brittle path. It is really hard to see her like this and it feels very out of character for someone who through all the trauma she's been through has always maintained an outer calm. Obviously the trauma has really kept piling on and she has a lot more to lose now than she did five seasons ago (and more people relying on her) so that's how I explain it to myself--her irritability and stress and all that. But it still feels jarring and uncomfortable. And since they never truly address it or have her apologize for it, it feels like a loose end.

I mean look: James was super irritable and gruff and snappy with her, too (I'm thinking about late season 2 especially), and I wish he'd apologized to her for it because she truly didn't deserve it. She wasn't doing anything to him back then that he wasn't doing to her here, which was stepping slightly out of line to challenge him. But James got his full redemption arc. James got all of season 3 to prove to her (and to us) that he loved her. More than anything. And that he'd literally die for her. He never apologized to her for his behavior towards her in late season 2 but it wasn't all that necessary story-wise because it was so obvious that he'd changed. She'd changed him. And he knew that and felt it deeply.

But there wasn't time in this short season for the full reverse arc to take place so we have to fill in a lot of those gaps on our own and assume it's meant to be understood this way. It all does happen eventually, in 5x07 on, and the more I've watched this season the more I do see it that way. It just doesn't really have a lot of time to truly settle that she's had this realization and it's changed her. I mean in some ways Teresa doesn't have to go through a full character transformation because she always was this person of integrity and heart. She's just here on the brink of losing it and then she luckily springs back from the edge.

A few other miscellaneous thoughts that I'm too disorganized to try to capture in a cogent way:

I do appreciate that this season humanizes Teresa to James. That he has to take her off the pedestal he's put her on and see her in all her flawed glory. How weird does it make me that I almost want to write a fic about some big retirement processing sessions where their trust issues flare up bc of the ways they've both treated each other unfairly in the past? Lol. Is that a fic genre?

Can we talk about the FBI plot for just a second and how they introduced it and wrapped it up within the span of a single episode? Whew, whiplash. They could've played that out a little bit longer as she continued expanding.

Speaking of the FBI, I realized on this rewatch that Lucien was way more deeply to blame in so much of the BS this episode than is really clear when you're just watching casually. He's the one that tipped off the FBI to her in the first place. It continues to piss me off how the havoc other people wreak becomes HER problem that SHE has to fix and somehow held accountable for.

And just in general: WHY are women held to SUCH FREAKING DOUBLE STANDARDS AT ALL TIMES???????

Just saying.

#qots s5 #5x04 #2021 rewatch #txt post #qots reaction post #qots meta #the highlight of this episode for me is that jeresa phone call where she sighs in relief and gratitude #¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

HOLY SHIT I FUCKING FOUND IT.

THANK AZAR

I have spent approximately the past 60 hours trying to find Srentha's old blog. It had so many silly and fun RPs and a lot of character building stuff!

I THOUGHT I remembered remaking his blog (the one that's a sideblog to this account), renaming the old blog so I could give the New Blog the Same URL, but I couldn't remember Exactly how I'd changed the old blog's url.

I originally thought it was just a sideblog of my old personal account, but I logged in and looked at the sideblog list and nearly panicked when I couldn't find it there. (Apparently I in fact have 3 emlog blogs, though??? Should probably consolidate those someday.)

Then I remembered that, way back then, a full decade ago, I had originally made Dove and Srentha's blogs as their own accounts! So I tried to log in to his!

It took me approximately 24 hours of scrounging around in my memories to remember what I used as "his" email address and password.

(It had been 3 days of Desperately Trying to Find This Blog, so the story gets even longer and even more frustrating.)

Then, when I finally remembered I made HIS OWN EMAIL ADDRESS, and what I THOUGHT I remembered the password (I swear to Azar, I had made it the same format as Dove's password, just altering the number and the name), Tumblr wouldn't let me log in without a verification email.

Problem is, Yahoo also wouldn't let me log in to his email. Even though, 10 years later, I still remember what his ID and password were because they were so Pretty and Poetic and Distinctive that they stuck out in my memory. So I couldn't find the URL by simply logging in to the account.

(Also, I "coded" the Yahoo Security Verification Question Answers for his account. Which was a stupid thing to do because then I had to Play Detective because I forgot how I'd coded them. One of them was "Where did you meet your spouse?" And I was like, that's Dove! That's Azarath, duh! Except that wasn't it. I had invented Seranath by then; maybe that's what I used? But no. It took me approximately 3 hours and several attempts using various capitalization techniques in case it was cAsE sEnSiVe to remember I had simply called it, "home." But then it asked me "What was your first pet's name?" SRENTHA'S BIRD HAS HAD SO MANY NAMES OVER THE YEARS. Fuck if I know which one I used! I tried Janellera, Sheera, and Sieara in case I used Dove's, but then it locked me out. Bleh. I might have used Survivor, which is what his name was meant to mean. But Yahoo wouldn't let me try again.)

So just as I was about to make an act of desperation: attempt reaching out to friends who had RP'd with him to see if they still had access to any posts his old blog may have liked/reblogged and maybe The Notes Section would show me His Current URL, I remembered something crucial.

After this blog/account became my Permanent Residence, I went to check my old blog and couldn't find it. Which was Distressing, don't get me wrong. But I quickly found out Tumblr changes the URLs of blogs on old, inactive accounts (ones that aren't Fully Deleted, just unused for a period of time) by adding "-blog" at the end of the URL.

So, fairly quivering with desperation and hope, I tried that. His regular, default, years-long URL.... with "-blog" at the end.

And it came right up!

It loaded beautifully! It's all there! The old patchwork theme with silly fun pictures and all the RPs I remembered and then some, and headcanons lists I don't even remember filling out! Everything I hoped to find and more!

(If you're curious, it's at @highpriest-in-training-blog. There's a lot of Random Fun and RP Fun to go around there, but I can't log into his account At All, so it won't ever be updated, unfortunately.)

I'm so incredibly relieved, you have No Idea. It really shouldn't have been this frustrating to try logging into something WHEN I KNOW THE EMAIL AND PASSWORD! But it WAS.

But now I'm just so relieved I'm a bit emotionally exhausted. Whew,

#rhs personal posts

[myopenletter]

The reason for the name

Whew. A lot of self reflection these last few months. A lot of wondering where did we go wrong? Where did I go wrong? A lot of blaming you. A lot of blaming me. A lot of right person wrong time, but then not believing in that either. Is there really a right person wrong time? I think that anything that is meant for us we can't miss. We may postpone it, but I don't believe that we can miss anything that is truly meant to cross our path. I believe we can block blessings by keeping ourselves in situations that no longer serve us. You cannot receive a blessing if there isn't any room for the blessing in your life.

I'm not even sure where the direction of this post is going, but it has been weighing on my mind and heart heavily.

To my sons father... my love for you is endless. I created a life with my best friend. Our son is our life. He is our heart outside of our body. I have never once questioned the amount of love you have for him. It makes me love you more each day which makes it harder to leave you alone. It makes it harder to move on. It makes it harder to accept that we will no longer be.

I romanticized the idea of you. I saw you for who you could be and not who you were. When we first started dating I felt the love and appreciation you had for me. I woke up grateful every day not knowing what I did to deserve you, but grateful to call you mine. I woke up excited for the possibilities even if we just laid in bed all day. You made me feel on top of the world. You did everything you could for me.

We went on dates.

We had fun.

Over time, I slowly watched it all fade away. We started arguing more and the disconnect was soon hard to ignore. Around my birthday in 2021 I was convinced we were going to break up. We got into an argument. You left because you thought I locked you out the bathroom and was ignoring you, but that wasn't the case. I was exhausted from a long wedding weekend and a night of drinking to celebrate and fell asleep in the shower. I was ready to end things, but I didn't want to do it out of emotions so I waited.

One week later I found out I was pregnant. I don't even remember what I felt in that moment. I knew things were rough, but I didn't think you'd react the way you did. I feel stupid some days for not ending the relationship then. I felt like so much heartbreak could have been prevented that followed in the years to come.

I felt like nothing but a vessel for you the entire time. I never felt appreciated throughout my pregnancy. At one point I went to live with my mom because I couldn't handle the feeling of being a burden in your life. I don't think you ever truly tried to sit and understand where I was coming from. I honestly block out a lot of the pregnancy because it just hurts to think of it. I feel ashamed. I always pictured being loved and appreciated and I wasn't. I was grateful for our son, but I felt so alone throughout my pregnancy. I didn't feel the support I needed from you. I'd be up at night crying, praying, and speaking love to our unborn child. I promised and prayed he would never feel as alone as I felt those long 37 weeks and 2 days carrying him. I felt like every appointment was just a chore for you and I hate thinking back on this time. I don't like looking at our maternity photos because I know they are just for show. We weren't happy.

The day Adrian came I still never felt appreciated. I felt like you wanted it to seem like you did it all on your own. I AM THE MOTHER OF YOUR CHILD AND YOU MADE ME FEEL LIKE SOME ONE NIGHT STAND THAT GOT PREGNANT. I just wanted to feel fucking appreciated. I gave birth to a beautiful little boy and still never felt appreciated. Why did I stay for so long? I wonder if you think I felt appreciated?

I'm not sure what happened, but I don't even have it in me to discuss this to you. I know you won't read this so I'm going to let it all out here. I am going to let out how much resentment I have towards the way you made me feel. I wish I could let it all go and I'm praying that if I release it here it'll allow me to truly let go. To truly move on. To truly forgive you and start forgiving myself for allowing this to go on for so long.

We stopped dating each other when baby A arrived. I tried to get you to do little date nights in, but you weren't intrigued with it. You would go see the boys, but you wouldn't spend time with me. I get your perspective of feeling like I only mentioned PPD/PPA when we argued, but it's the only time you'd sit and listen. It's the only time I had your undivided attention. I really struggled and still do, but you have no idea. You don't understand. You don't get it. I don't even think that you care some days.

I don't mean to paint you as the villain, but this is how I genuinely feel. You get mad at me still for being short tempered, but you don't comprehend how exhausted I am. I don't even bother to communicate to you because you bitch that all I do is complain. You don't even listen to me when I talk to you. We haven't been together since November of last year, but I don't think we truly felt like we were separated until you moved out in June this year.

Things have changed. I don't think you ever wanted a family. I think you just wanted a kid(s). You speak of having more children with me, but never mentioned getting back together. You state that you don't want multiple baby mamas, but don't want to commit. I wish I could truly comprehend your way of living.

Opposites don't attract and that's what I've learned from our relationship. I am grateful that we typically agree when it comes to our son, but as a couple I don't think we will ever work. I like to talk things out, you like to cool off and let shit go. This doesn't resolve issues. Sometimes you've got to sit and discuss the ugly shit even if it's you.

One thing I've truly done with this break up is focus on me. I have a lot of ugly habits I have become self-aware of. I am currently working on trying to heal these habits. I am searching for an option for therapy that won't kill me financially since my insurance doesn't cover it. I am trying to become the best version of myself because our son deserves it.

I need to let you go. I need to truly let go of the idea of us coming back together. These last few weeks have really made me reflect on us. We just don't work. There is a lot I need to do, but a lot you've got to work on as well. I realized I am still getting the same old hot and cold temperament from you. I never know what version of you I'm going to get. Three weeks ago things were wonderful and fun. This weekend you were awful and Monday morning you wanted to joke around. I was irritated from the irrational attitude I caught all weekend, but if I was short with you I'd be a bitch or you'd dismiss me because I'm killing the mood.

It's one sided with you. I get that we're allowed to have bad moments, but just communicate that. Tell me you just aren't in the mood or something. It is exhausting trying to figure you out.

Yesterday when we were outside we got into a disagreement about something small and it all clicked. I don't know what it was, but it was what I needed. It made me realize as much as I want you to be my person doesn't mean you are. It made me remember the heartbreak I felt years ago over a boy who I thought I was going to marry. I know better things lie ahead.

The healing process is a rough, but hurt people hurt people. I need to heal. I need to learn to stop carrying the hurt and issues from one relationship to the next. I know I did that with us and I'm sorry I couldn't stop it. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry that I made a lot of issues from my previous relationship your fault, but we all have our faults. I am aware of what I need to continue to work on and I will continue to do it. I will continue to break generational curses because what caused my relationship with you to fail was also the downfall in my parents marriage.

I'd be a fool if I didn't say I don't think about you coming to my house and knocking on my door begging to come home like they do in movies, but that's the thing. This only happens in movies and not reality. I've spent so much time praying for us to grow back together one day. I need to stop. I need to pray for myself. I need to pray for my self-love journey. I need to pray that I forgive MYSELF. I am all I truly have. I need to be kinder to myself.

To whatever the future holds for me. I am ready. I am open. I am prepared to do the work I need to do to heal. I am prepared to learn to love myself. I am prepared to forgive myself. I am prepared to prioritize myself. I am ready to heal.

[fd-writes]

The Third Quarter Doesn’t Count You Out!

Back in the game; “to become involved or active in something again. Returning to some activity after an absence.”

Returning to something after a hiatus can either energize you or make you feel defeated. Full transparency here, I would have loved to have started rocking out my goals in the first quarter but it came and went, the second quarter I thought, “Oh this is it, let’s get down to business” but again the time passed. But now here I am in the third quarter and I am now energized and I can only contribute it to one thing, I left my contract job at the end of last month. Now don’t get me wrong the job was fine and my boss was amazing, she wanted me to come on full-time I turned her down and told her that the goals that I have for myself do not align with this role. Whew, child talk about growth LOL! There was a time in my life I would have taken the job offer and then been miserable as heck and when you take the time to learn about yourself, I mean going deep within what you will find is that a lot of things, you should have never entertained, got involved with and wasted your precious time plus gifts on stuff that isn’t meant for you. I had to learn that and at times to my detriment. I could have easily wallowed in self-pity because let’s be honest that is one of the easiest things to do, those pity parties be lit. The real question is, do you want to continue to have those types of parties or do you want to do the things you have always wanted to do, if the answer is yes, like mine was a thunderous yes, then let’s discuss how we can take steps toward it.

First, take your eyes off what everyone else is doing and put that attention on yourself. Second, whether you journal, do voice memos, meditate, do yoga, or whatever it is to help you get clarity on yourself, do that. Also, get quiet (no phones, or social media). Third, start removing distractions from your life (I know this is a tricky one for many of us) so you will have to start slow and build your way up. Fourth, be kind and gentle with yourself by understanding that it takes time.

My journey is ongoing, letting go of my fears and doubts, being careful to not self-sabotage, silencing the critical voice in my head, removing myself from the rabbit hole of comparison, and refraining from gossip and slander. These things if I am not careful, mindful, and watchful will keep me from moving forward. As a good friend of mine always says, “Watch and Pray”

Remember if something no longer serves you, or you choose to no longer sit at the table just get up and leave. There is no need to martyr ourselves over people or things that do not light our spirits aflame.

Until My Next Post…Never Count Yourself Out!

Photo Credit: Andrew Wise

#fdwrites #2023 #backinthegame #transparency #writer #creative #contentcreator #blackgirlswhoblog #blog #blogger #thirdquarter

[alyjojo]

Love Reading 😍 - May 2023 - Virgo

Singles:

Overall energy: 2 Swords

How you will meet: The Sun

How they will treat you: 8 Swords & Ace of Pentacles

Long-term Potential: 4 Swords rev

Oracle:

Good grief. Don’t take things personally.

You’ve been dealing with this person on and off for awhile, I don’t think it’s going to last much longer. Their messages are great, they’re crazy about you, but yours are not, and because of this, they’re going to end up moving on. The Sun here is more about waking up, realizing that their feelings are not being reciprocated. You could have abandoned them in a wounded state or left them behind financially, whatever was done is something they wouldn’t do to you, in their mind. You must be trying to get back in contact, because they’re in 2 Swords about it. Clearly they have feelings for you, but they feel disrespected or unloved, and the two of you have never spoken about these feelings or anything deep, with meaning.

They can’t even attempt a new start with you unless there is healing, conversations about whatever happened, probably apologies, and there’s just not, it’s not happening. Long term is healing and leaving the burden behind, giving up and walking away, because it’s the best thing for them to do. There could be ex’s and outsiders involved, per your messages, it’s clearly complicated, and they’re not willing to deal with any of this. Seems more like a lesson than a soulmate. It’s possible for some of you to decide to heal this connection and let the other drama go, some of you are moving on to other people entirely, either way this ends up, karma will be served and you/they will feel success just by having been in this connection at all, whether it fails or not. It could simply be meant to be to move you towards other things. With their messages, it’s 50/50 whether it’s works, but it depends on you & what you do. If ex’s are part of the problem, they gotta go.

Messages -

Their side:

- Light of My Life ☀️

- You make me so hot 🥵

- I don’t want ANYONE else.

Your side:

- Shady Ex’s

- Stalker 👀

- Bad Cycle

Signs you may be dealing with:

Capricorn, Libra, Taurus & Leo

Couples:

Overall energy: The Star

Current: Page of Cups

Challenge: 4 Swords

How they feel about you: 8 Wands

How you feel about them: King of Wands rev

Outcome: 7 Cups

I think this is a connection you’re trying to leave, but intimacy keeps drawing you back in. You could have kids together, or one of you could, not necessarily, but there is some financial tie between you and this person. I don’t get marriage. It’s like you’re done, you don’t want this anymore, they come crying to you about money or kids and you play a savior role and…sleep with them. I could be off, but that’s what I get. It feeds your ego. I don’t see what the issue even is, just that there is one, and it’s taking a looong time to sort out.

If you have kids together, they could be hounding you for child support, and very defensive about having to manage everything when you aren’t around. Valid. You seem to only want to give to them when you’re getting something out of it, sex basically. Whew Virgo, this is a mess. You like that they need you, but by the same token, may be repeatedly throwing them to the wolves or being unreliable so they’ll what, beg? That’s what it seems like it’s been, at worst. The challenge is healing, not speaking, not fighting, being reliable, and this taking a long time. They see you as someone who acts too busy, too “important” and this causes pain for them and possibly children involved, possibly talking down to them when they need your help, even though it feeds your ego.

This can’t apply for everyone, and in some cases it’s switched, and they would see you as messaging them how much you’re struggling to manage everything. I do not choose what messages come out, this is a very difficult dynamic 😣 How you see them is not taking the lead, not being a leader, having no confidence or gusto to just do the thing, maybe no passion & sex drive, whatever applies, and moving away from you because they have no choice. Or you’re refusing to help or respond. In some cases, one person is extremely cold to a struggling ex. In other cases, a struggling ex may be using them for money. Or these may simply be perceptions, they say are are three sides to every situation so…the outcome for this month is a separation, and options in love. I see desire on your end, healing on both sides, coming back around to heal the connection seems like it’s mutually desired…but no one takes action. 2 Cups is love, mutual love. You both seem to wonder if the other one even cares, though feelings and passion are both here. Not enough swords, not enough communication, and there is no equal. Balance. One person has everything on their shoulders. In some cases, one person is all about intimacy, the other is about money, and there is an exchange between you in this way. Perhaps love just made it complicated.

Messages -

Their side:

- What other people say matters too much to me.

- I love to SURPRISE you 😯

Your side:

- Short Hair

- $$$

Oracles -

Wax on. Wax off.

Their side:

Quit obsessing about whether you’re a good enough mother, father, or any other family member. If your motive is pure, God knows your heart.

Being alone can help you know yourself - and even more important - love yourself.

Your side: Love yourself and all the good in you. Then others will feel it and love you too.

Signs you may be dealing with:

Virgo, Sagittarius, Gemini, Leo, Capricorn & Pisces

#virgo tarot reading #may 2023 #love reading #couples reading #singles reading #Virgo #tarot #free reading #tarotblr

[ezra-brainrot]

I forgot to mention on here that I was given permission to write a fic about a Hannah Montana AU and I did BUT - if you follow me at all on Twitter, you should know I am... an unapologetic music nerd.

And I meant to write out a little more about that side of it just because I enjoy sharing music nerd things.

Anyway - originator of the Matt Magdred AU here. (ty for allowing me to play in the AU!!)

And here is the fic!!

And now for some notes about things:

Ch 1 - Bands mentioned in this AU: Same as Sam == Better Than Ezra, my favorite band. Formed in 1988, generally alternative / Southern rock and idk what else to add to them. The title of the fic is from their song "In the Blood."

Golden Throne == Silverchair. Silverchair was an Australian band that got their start at twelve years old. They started out as grunge-ish but experimented around with alternative and progressed over time. When I was writing this, I was also thinking of the singer - Daniel Johns - who ended up with a lot of mental and physical health struggles from being a celebrity so early. It's a rough to read about but it's also reflected in their music, especially Neon Ballroom. "Feeling Unwell" is a play on my favorite Silverchair song, "Emotion Sickness."

Excitement Split == Joy Division. British band in the late 70s that helped create post-punk which later served as the basis for 2000s-era emo. Ian Curtis is another singer who had a lot of tragedy and struggled with epilepsy. Twenty Four Hours is on my personal Dimitri playlist.

Solar Flare is a nod to a New Order song "Vicious Streak", which was a lyric I used in a fic a way way long ago. It is on my Dimilix playlist!

If you try to place this fic in a timeline, I am not so sure I could do it. Circa mid-90s to early 2000s? Annette is definitely hauling around Teen Beat / Tiger Beat magazines which are no longer in print form!

Chapter 2:

I forgot to mention this in the A/N but Rodrigue is a fan of The Grass Roots (Turf Germs here). Grass Roots was a band but they also weren't - they were a group of session musicians that got together and they still sound very unique. They did Where Were You When I Needed You? (later covered by The Bangles) and Sooner or Later. This was kind of the perfect band for "slightly esoteric but still very embarrassing for the kids."

The concert experience was 1000% own personal experience speaking. Not too long before I wrote that part, I'd actually gone to see Better Than Ezra in Richmond (and Toad the Wet Sprocket about two weeks previously) and it really is an amazing experience when everything goes right.

Also I didn't get to go into it deeply in the story itself but Dedue is Dimitri's manager / musical partner. Dedue is looking to get into the music business as a producer and start his own recording studio. He and Dimitri are really good friends that met when Dimitri went out one day to buy a guitar and just worked well together + Dedue has a good handle on Dimitri's mental health and balancing his career around it.

Chapter 3:

This is a teen melodrama so - wearing someone else's varsity jacket is a Big Deal. But it also left Dimitri out in an awkward position because he is very consistent about Matt Magdred wear versus Dimitri wear.

Which is another thing I might do in a side story maybe? When I was writing this, I was thinking of Dimitri being very deliberate in how he separates his Dimitri self and his Matt self, as Dimitri is poised, friendly, well put-together but Matt gets to be "honest" and outgoing and confident, and it's an important part of Dimitri's self-actualization that he begins to merge the two and just be himself. I just view Dimitri as someone that still struggles to find his own identity well into his teens / early 20s because he's spent so much of his teen years trying to force himself to be what other people think he should be. Whew, long tangent.

I tried to explain the difference between a karaoke bar and a bar-with-karaoke here because I wasn't familiar with it at all until I actually went to one. But you really do get your very own room and can sing your heart out with friends.

Seasoned Femmes is... Spice Girls. Because Annette would love sugary pop. Ambitious is Wannabe. Felix will not escape the cringe.

Chapter 4: Rise Up Guy == Fall Out Boy. Who, by the way, covered "Love Will Tear Us Apart" by Joy Division. Ehehe.

Ice Police == Snow Patrol. I have this ridiculous headcanon that Snow Patrol is Felix's secret Dimitri band because he can't admit to liking melodramatic love songs... even though he has an entire burned CD of them to listen to in his car. "Open Your Eyes" is Felix's song for Dimitri (among many others). And "Somewhere A Clock is Ticking" is on my Dimitri playlist.

Eve-Quick is Taylor Swift. Because many of my mutuals are T-Swift fans. It is also a very subtle reference to another 90s alternative band, Eve 6.

This is super-nonsensical but WWAZ == WWOZ, a New Orleans jazz station. I was also thinking about when I listened to an interview with a musician over the radio once and he was in a garage and... accidentally set off a row of car alarms. Luckily, Dimitri did not do that.

The LP Dimitri is looking at in Hot Topic is Social Distortion. I always found it funny that Hot Topic had Social Distortion t-shirts and Dead Kennedys t-shirts. (Dead Kennedys were notoriously anti-corporate). If I imagine musician!Mitri, it's usually the Social Distortion aesthetic.

I waffled a bit - initially, I was thinking of having Felix find out by seeing Dimitri in his trailer and being undercut by a group of fans/ paparazzi almost catching him putting on his Magdred persona, but that didn't really feel right since the focus was more on Dimitri-as-a-normal-teenager. So his almost-reveal happening in a mall out of nowhere felt a lot more natural in terms of normal life always under threat by celebrity culture.

So uh - thanks for reading this!! If there's anything else you want to know, I can try my best!!

#dimilix #misc ezra fanfic thoughts

[tyonfs]

besties (gone sexual) was so good!!!!! i wasn’t expecting it to be as huge as it was (literally fell asleep at 4:30 am last night trying to finish it but i still had like a third left 😭) but it was soooo worth it!!! it also didn’t feel like it was that huge tho??? a lot of stuff happened but you did so good at explaining and why. even the 3 times jaemin got puked on, that was some beautiful karmic timing imo. speaking of karma i think the amount of bad luck jaemin has to suffer was such a good way to keep him redeemable despite sometimes an absolute douchebag. a lovable douchebag tho. the amount of times i cackled in this fic tho!!! obviously the other installments of bitch hunters werr humorous too, but the addition of jisung, sungchan, yangyang, and hendery coming it to occasionally dunk on jaemin, too, when he deserves it was just *chef’s kiss*. i also think the length is justified because their situation is more complicated and nuanced than jeno and renjun who were just getting to know new people, and even hyuck who was making his situation complicated himself. jaemin and oc have so much history between them, literal years of friendship and complicated feelings. it’s kinda obvious by the end that the reason for jaemin douchebagginess to a lot of those girls was because he was so in love with oc and refusing to even consider that as possibility so he just rejects the idea of a relationship because also being with someone else seems impossible. ngl i did choke up a little when he makes the conclusion that in order to let his best friend try to be in a happy relationship, he has to extract himself from the equation because he wouldn’t be able to even be her friend in that circumstance. he didn’t have to make her cry tho!! but as someone who can also be a little emotionally constipated i understand that line of thinking. needless to say i really enjoyed this fic. i previously said and they were roommates was my favorite installment was my favorite but ngl, besties gone sexual might be giving it run for its money 👀 i’m always going to have a weak spot for long-time-best-friends-turned-friends-with-benefits-turned-lovers. i’m also feeling so nostalgic now that the series is over!! i’m gonna miss the bitch hunters universe, there’s so much stuff i’m curious about, especially the og bitch hunters because these four made them sound almost…mythical. and then there’s mark. love how jaehyun just came in to give jaemin a rewording of the centuries old saying of “it’s meant to be it will come back to you eventually” and jaemin acted like it was the greatest revelation ever simply because it came from him. anyways, whew, this turned out longer than i intended it to but i just have so many thoughts. also it fitting for such a long story. anyways, i’m done. this was such treat to read as always. i hope you’re having a lovely day, take care!!! 😘💗

OMG IM SORRY IT KEPT YOU UP THAT LONG 😭😭 PLS READ IT IN BREAKS I DONT WANNA RUIN UR SLEEP 🤲 wait lemme put the rest of my response under the cut it’s a bit long 😵‍💫

ppl say my writing doesn’t feel like a lot, which i think is a good thing?? so maybe that’s why HAHHA but i promise it was 43k words i’m not capping 😰 LMAODJF jaemin truly deserved to be puked on 😭 especially when he started drinking after renjun was seeing god on the couch 🧎‍♀️

ahh yesyes i think so too!! i think they needed a bit more development to figure out their problems and situations, unlike jeno and renjun who were meeting their love interests for the first time 🥹 and then hyuck’s dilemma was more of an internal thing that he had to get over himself, but jaemin’s situation was a lot more messy and tangled. i’m rlly glad you liked the additions of other characters tho!! i love writing jisung tbh so i thought he would be funny to include HAHAH and his dynamic with jaemin is kinda wholesome in my eyes :’)

HONESTLY i’m a little emotionally constipated so there might have been some projection in this fic!! it’s true he definitely had (kinda??) good intentions for distancing himself from mc, but he went about it the wronggg way and made her cry 😭 LIKE BOOOOOO 👎👎🍅🍅🍅

WOWOW that actually makes me so happy to hear that besties (gone sexual) might be your fav in the series :’) hyuck’s installment and jaemin’s are definitely my fav and i’m just a sucker for best friends to lovers 🤧 it’s such a sweet trope but can segway into a lot of misunderstandings and angst HAHAH

HAHAHAH THEY WORSHIP THE OGS 🥲 “these four made them sound almost… mythical. and then there’s mark” I CACKLED LMFAOO yeah mark was NOT part of the og squad so he doesn’t get the legendary pokémon type treatment 😭🤚 it’s a good thing renjun didn’t witness that conversation or else he would’ve beaten jaemin up after for ignoring him the entire time until jaehyun parroted his words LOL

but thank you love for taking the time to write all of this and send it to me!!! it makes me so happy that you had so much to share about my fic and it literally had me rereading with a huge smile on my face :’)) i hope you’re having a wonderful day/night and taking care 💜💜

#asks #anon #fic: besties (gone sexual)