The Forgotten Schnee
Jacques: My chikdren are champions! Except for Jaune.
Willow: Which one is Jaune again?
Jaune: (Sneezed on by a deer, Sighs)
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Klein: Master Jaune, your parents called. They have decided to extend their trip to Vale by one week.
Jaune: But... But my birthday is tomorrow.
Klein: Indeed. (Sets birthday cake down, Cake falls over)
Jaune: Are... Are my sisters coming?
Klein: They send their regards from military and reform school respectively.
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Jacques: Gather 'round, Schnee family. You've been gathered to Schnee Manor to uphold our most grand of traditions; the annual rankings of the Schnee children. Klein, remove the names from the board.
Klein: (Scrubs names with push broom)
Jacques: You each have one minute to defend your worth. Whitley?
Whitley: I have just made partner at my firm. I have also seen to it that the case is resolved to our benefit. After all, is it not every Faunus' right to work themselves to death for the SDC without any benefits to his surviving kin?
Willow: Weiss?
Weiss: I have just ended my six-figure singing contract to pursue my one, true passion. Freelance huntress service!
Jacques: Our cup zero is becoming a hero! (Snorts) Jaune.
Jaune: O-Oh, uh, my job is super important, too! I just, uh, can't talk about it, or the tiny nano-bots will explode my brain.
Jacques: Yes, your "classified" job. (Sighs) I can't help blaming myself... for not blaming the staff hard enough for raising you weak! You've always been an embarrassment! Unlike Winter, here, who will surely carry the family name!
Winter: My campaign for Mantle Chairman airs it's first commercial tonight. Truly, this campaign could not have happened without all of you.
Jaune: (Watches everyone self-praise) W-Wait. Are ALL of you working on Winter's campaign? Why didn't anyone ask me for help?
Jacques: With what?! Slowly draining your trust fund?! Klein, up top! (High fives Klein)
Klein: Savage burn, sir.
Winter: No offense, Jaune, but you have always been a sort of... spineless yes-man.
Jaune: I'm not spineless! The doctors just say my spine is huggably soft...
Willow: Well, Stardust II just had her first foal, so it's a tie for fourth.
Jacques: All those in favor of Stardust II in fourth!
Schnees: AYE!
Jaune: ...Aye.
Jacques: Bring out the will, because that horse is getting a beach house in Menagerie!
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Anonymous asked:
oh wonderful!! then, could i ask for a moodboard for a noncanon rwby kin who's really missing his ren and whitley? i was in a poly relationship with them! themes of lotus flowers, ice/snow, feeling complete together would be lovely, if those work? if you need more details, i can provide them!! thank you very much in advance! - 🐾
Hey anon! I hope this came out the way you were hoping. Wasn’t sure which color you aligned with so I went with a muted purple, I hope that’s alright!
- Mod Hollow
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hi i'm whitley schnee from rwby! i'm looking for my sister weiss (and only weiss, not winter) and maybe klein! i'm 17 and okay with doubles! pls like or reblog this and i'll contact you!
!!!
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first post
my name is marlowe/marquise/magnolia [more listed on my pronouny] and i kin whitley schnee, bryce tankthrust is somehow a comfort character for me, i’ve cried over falsettos and hedwig & the angry inch too many times, and i love milfs
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@ the anon talking about whitley schnee- i kin him and you just absolutely made my day bc no ones ever nice to him and you're right in every regard but i am feeling a little called out
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I'm Yu Narukami from a crossover canon with RWBY and Persona 4. I was a student at Beacon who alternated between Teams RWBY and JNPR, and was adopted by Ozpin. I also had amnesia, so if you are looking for a noncanon kin who is Ozpin's adopted son, I might be of help! I'm looking for anyone, especially Jaune, Whitley, Ren, Mercury, Emerald, Ozpin and Qrow, except Weiss and Nora (who I've already found)! Please like/reblog this post and I'll contact you! Oh, and I'm 21 years old! - 🐾
!!!!
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Tfw when you're kin with a character who gets forgotten 99% of the time, and all you want in life is cute art of you and your boyfriend, but... none to be found. We haven't met in canon, and I've only seen ship art of me with Ruby and Oscar ... I just.... I want some art of me and Sun, even if it's some crappy doodle. I'd die for anyone who drew us together -Whitley "not an asshole I swear" Schnee
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