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undergrounddweller89 · 3 years

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(look you don't have to like this, I'm not expecting anyone to, I just needed to write and if there's the possibility that even one person was hoping I'd write more and enjoys it then that's cool, just don't be a dick about it, it's more house mate au stuff, don't hope for continuity by that I mean it's just all over the place and nothing makes sense , just expect what ever came to my head at the time lol)

Walter was sat at his work table, fiddling with one of his new devices working on to perfect it, no I can't think of anything specific so I'll let you fill in that with your imagination.

The day had been long, his lab assistant Timothy Lawrence (Yea that Timothy if you know him because reasons) had been pretty quiet but done as told so at least that made it easier.

He was tired as the day had gone on his mood had sunk, what was he doing teasing Killian like that, honestly spanking him with the hair brush, he knew some of the things Killian had been up to.

But it was more likely a sign of marking territory or just because he had needs right and it was exciting to do things where you shouldn't.

The blade he was handling slipped and ran across the pad of his index finger, he hissed in pain, seeing the blood smear under the blue latex, pooling to drip, focusing on the red colour he hadn't even noticed Timothy running to fetch the first aid kit.

Pulling his gloves off he discarded them and popped open the box that had been set on the table.

"Thanks Timmy."

Walter smiled a little as he tended to his finger, he hated how the skin felt parting every time he flexed his finger.

Cleaning up and applying what was needed, thankful it wouldn't need stitches.

He wondered what Killian was up to, watching TV, reading maybe, did he eat, did he have enough to drink, was he in a depressive mood, was he mad that hed spanked him, he really should send a message.

Pulling his phone from his lab pocket he texted him.

'Hope you're day has been good, hope you're well, sorry if I upset you this morning.'

He shifted and rubbed a shoulder, he didn't realise how stiff his back had gone, being in charge of a division meant he'd somewhat lost track of self care making sure to do his stretches.

Timothy stood here watching his boss, lot better than the last one, this one was kind and genuine, always looking out for people, honestly Beckett made him feel safe and relaxed, he wasn't looking for anything serious but even he could see that furrowed bow and the lean that spelt hey I'm exhausted let me die.

Walking around and behind him he slowly massaged his shoulders, they were small and rather petite for someone Walter's age but it was more lean muscle and just body build, he just hadn't seen many men like Walter where he'd come from, he was rather pretty.

Walter had considered telling him to stop but when his fingers pressed into that one perfect spot in his shoulder blades he melted, ooooh that just felt so damn good and shit when was the last time he'd had contact, had someone be closer to him...he liked Killian...wondered if they could be more, but he didn't believe for one second that they could be lovers or bed fellows for one moment...not that he wouldn't be interested in finding out but Killian had been there a month, like he wasn't going to make him uncomfortable and feel like that the only way he could stay was if he dated him.

(I keep forgetting times or how many days set shrugs just don't expect like decent continuity, I write these because I need to just write things and moments)

Walter leaned forward arms folded and face buried in them

"Sorry sir, am I doing that badly?"

Timothy's enquired nervously, his hands going still.

"No, please don't stop, I literally didn't realise how stiff I was, you have good hands, I'm just so tired Timothy, I could really use it if you don't mind that is."

"Not at all sir."

Tim smiled happy to know he was helping, yes much nicer than his last boss, Walter was smart but he was also fragile, like him he loved his mother and when he'd heard Walters mother had died when he was small he wanted to scoop him up and just hug him.

A talk with Lance at one point and he'd learned that was a natural reaction for anyone with a heart around Walter who didn't have their head up their ass.

Which had practically been the last tech department Beckett had worked in, that totally wasn't cool that they'd done that to such a brilliant mind, it was so much fun working on items that didn't kill people and actually helped them!

Walter was imagining the fingers loosening the knots in his back were Killian, wondered what that would feel like with those pretty metal claws, but he never forgot it was Timothy, after all Timothy deserved more respect than that.

Looking over his shoulder at him, auburn hair flopping off to one side, Tim's hands on his waist he noticed the subtle blush.

"You wanna go grab some dinner or something in a minute there's a corner café I know, makes steak sandwiches and baked potatoes with a perfect crispy skin, a warm meal sounds pretty nice don't you think?"

Tim in the angle he was in was trying not to think about how suggestive this looked, he would absolutely lean down and kiss Walter if he thought it was an option, it really was a casual thing he felt, but Walter just looked so pretty and like he needed someone to carry him right now.

Continuing to rub his back Timothy nodded

"Yeah that sounds pretty nice actually."

---

At home Killian had found plenty to do, he'd read, watched tv, all in Walters bed of course, just to feel close to him as he could, he did wonder after handling himself, if Walter could see him as anything more than a friend, someone more than a few passing jokes between the other...turning his head and taking in his scent as he buried his face into a pillow again, looking forward to seeing those blue eyes...he should really get out of Walter's bed and get the covers washed.

Beckett brought comfort to his mind after his years of suffering, the sunrise after the storm.

He'd talked to Lovey, wondering if she could understand him, she was surprisingly responsive to his rambling as he worked on his arm, updating the tech and keeping up with maintenence.

Living here with Walter and slowly working past things with Lance and seeing he had genuinely started changes of his own, it made it easier with how Walter talked about him on the job, that he considered all options before violence and discussed the situations with him...it was good to know Beckett had helped Lance to.

He was glad to know Walter's field partner was a good one, though his lab partner, this Timothy Lawrence seemed to be pretty chummy didn't he, he'd seen a picture, thick brown hair, heterochromia eyes, blue and green to be exact and a chiseled jaw, in other words a damn pretty boy and he didn't want him around Walter.

He huffed folding his arms, yes he was jealous he was going to be pouty, before his injury he had thick black hair and had been known to be a very handsome man, now he looked like he'd been put through a grinder when he took off his holo mask and this Timothy Lawrence just had to be Walter's lab partner, he'd be around him alot and-

His phone buzzed, it'd been put on the side table and he read the text that'd come through and there was another one.

'Going out to dinner with Timothy, don't know what time I'll be back, have fun you probably need a break from me anyway lol 😂'

Killian's eye twitched, he nearly threw the damn phone, but how would he explain that, honestly he couldn't, Tristan sighed, shoulders drooping a little and answered his questions

'It's been a relaxing day, did work on the arm, Lovey' s surprisingly easy to talk to, watched a little television but perhaps you could suggest something to watch, it's rather hard deciding with all these options and no Walter you didn't upset me, though you left in a hurry, you do not need to avoid me. You're not a bother. Are you alright?'

'I'm so happy you're warming up to her! That's awesome! Also it's good you have time to relax, ten years of hectic stress you're more than overdue! I...well I was more embarrassed than anything, I reacted on instinct, last boyfriend liked that well that's probably more than you needed to know, but yeah I'll help you pick something to watch see you later!'

Last boyfriend? Spanking, Walter had, he had...Killian shifted well the blankets were starting to tent, the idea of being put over Walters petite lap and being told he was a very bad man came to mind.

He liked it.

A lot.

He looked at his phone as it pinged again.

'And god damn it, make sure you eat something for dinner, don't just go picking out the cupboard!'

Killian snickered and replied

'Yes Daddy, I'll make sure to eat something.'

After sending the text he realised what he'd written and wished he could take back that text, wincing as he managed to look at the response

'Behave, eat dinner or I'll put you over my knee young man.'

Killian stared and stared at that answer, he knew Walter was just teasing but, his cheeks were warm and he was...was he blushing.

----

"You all set to go Timothy?"

Walter smiled, his back was feeling a hundred times better after Timothy had dug into the knots, it wasn't a surprise that he was good with his hands, you had to have nimble ones to work with the tech they used here.

"Yeah, just coming boss!"

He pulled his satchel over his shoulder after pulling on his old brown leather jacket

"Please Timothy don't call me that, call me daddy."

Walter laughed at how silly that sounded

"I'm sorry, pfffft don't call me that god please, no, Walter's just fine."

Tim had paused a moment a slight fear he might have a streak like his last boss after all but that laugh was too warm and giggly and just shook his head with a smile

"Wouldn't dream of it Walter, you're more of a kitten anyway."

Timmy felt his insides tighten a little and there was that hint of Jack Dna surfacing.

"So shall we go?"

Beckett enquired looking up at him, huh he kinda looked like Killian, just a little.

"Ready when you are."

And with that they were off.

(Alright end of this ramble, Timothy has been thrown in because I needed the gasp drama of prolongation and shit and didn't have the energy to create an oc and honestly I'll mash anything from anywhere if it's convenient bleh)

#Spies in disguise #Au #walter beckett #Killian #Timothy lawrence #I don't even know anymore #Sometimes I just write and bs comes out #I'm tired

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katierosefun · 3 years

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author interview tag game

thank you for the tag, @pandora15! <3

Name: caroline

Fandoms: mostly the clone wars, but i also have some marvel stuff, and waaay back in the day, i wrote some doctor who and merlin stuff!

Where you post: primarily on ao3! i mostly just write on tumblr when i’m accepting prompts from like...ask games or something.

Most Popular Oneshot: real

Most Popular Multichap: to these memories (this fic only recently hit 1k kudos, and my heart?? w h a t)

Favorite Story You’ve Written: def. to these memories because a) longest fic i’ve ever written, and b) oh, the hours i logged into writing this fic, and c) oh, the outlining that went into this fic...i’m very proud of myself for completing the fic, and of course, i credit this to everyone who showed their lovely support for the story. :’)

Fic You Were Nervous to Post: uhhh definitely too far just because it’s...rather personal. i sometimes say that there’ll be a scene or two or just straight up a line or two that’s plucked out of my real life, and i think it’s inevitable for writers of any kind, including fic writers, to isolate their real lives completely from whatever they’re writing, and?? this fic is probably the most personal for me because of that. i remember kinda hem-hawwing about posting it, because i was like whoa, maybe this is a little too personal? but then i steeled myself and was like, “okay, well, would this have lifted my spirits when i needed a story like this??” and then decided to post it.

How you choose your titles: i def. toss and turn between titles! there’s a few fics of mine that are straight-up song lyrics (no surprise there), but to my surprise (as i was looking through my catalogue of fics just now), i realize that a lot of my fics are usually just words or two about what i think might have been extremely important to the story. (or captures the overall tone/theme of the story, anyways.)

Do you outline? for multi-chapter fics and relatively long one-shots with lots of moving parts, i’ll outline. but for shorter one-shots and prompts, i’ll usually just stick with the image that compelled me to write the prompt/one-shot in the first place! (and then kinda write around that.)

Complete: uhhhhh, i’m gonna answer relatively for all my clone wars fics, because in total, i have 74 completed fics. (make that...75, hopefully in a few minutes or hours!) but out of clone wars fics, i have 46 completed fics! (and again, hopefully 47 in a little while.) a part of me is lowkey hoping that i’ll get up to 100 total fics by the end of this year. a part of me highly doubts it, but given how much i was able to write over summer break, i’m...intruiged if i wind up somehow writing another twenty or so fics by the end of this year. (asfsf my wip list is long enough to fill in for another twenty fics. caroline finish all your wips challenge.)

In Progress: okay, so officially, time, wondrous time is in progress and online. but in terms of the works in progress on my laptop...i have...*mutters, counting* fourteen official wips. (ten of them are one-shots, and the other four are longform fics. one of them, i’m hoping to release next week (!!!), and another, i’m hoping to release hopefully around mid-december. uhhh so fingers crossed??)

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: oops, i guess i kinda already answered that question, but eh, might as well! the one coming out next week (hopefully!! caroline get your shit together challenge!!) is titled most ardently, and it’s an obitine au based off pride & prejudice because i cannot and will not shut up about obitine being the period drama ship out of star wars okay--

and then the other longform fic that is very overdue is called getting lost in a big galaxy, which is a fix-it of sorts taking place after season 5. anakin’s gone missing, and obi-wan winds up going on a galaxy-ride road trip with ahsoka (who, remember, has left the order) to find their idiot. this is honestly my excuse to just write more obi-wan and ahsoka content. hopefully, that’ll be posted in december!! (despite the fact i...originally meant to post it in august oOps.)

and then there’s this other longform fic which...might be coming in early 2021 called red, underlined, which is essentially...uh. everyone’s a stressed out law-school student, and anakin might have accidentally murdered professor palpatine, and now anakin, obi-wan, ahsoka, padme, and rex are all trying to find out what the hell to do with themselves because they’re all in on it. (def. influenced by how to get away with murder except without the criminal justice professor to lead them through the ropes. so more chaos. kind of a dark comedy vibe, if anything else? anakin no is major theme in this one. uh, i mean, maybe anakin was justified in murdering creep palpatine because our gang’s gonna find out what was going on in the background, but either way! lots of “holy shit are we good people are we bad people what are we doing”. lots of questions about morality! ethics! law school student study nights with anakin sprawled out on the floor and obi-wan wearing glasses (which he pushes up the bridge of his nose whenever he’s about to lecture anakin that no, that’s not how that statute works, dumbass) and ahsoka just bringing snacks and rex catching paper airplanes and padme being the one to supply everyone with very neat flashcards. this fic is gonna be an absolute beheamoth, and i’m estimating about 45 chapters? like...130K+ words? help? yeah idk either this really blew up in my head

and then...this stupid, wonderful, boring, amazing job, which is...office x tcw au. only not? it’s very, very loosely based off the office, but not really. obi-wan moves in as a new manager of a company, and we’ve got anakin being like “lol new guy i’m gonna mess with him”, and ahsoka being the one who’s both like “please don’t mess with our new boss” but also being like “actually, wait, lemme help”, rex being in hr and being like “i don’t get paid enough for this”. (also there’s some parts that are written like actual interviews like you would find in the office, so there’s this one bit where uhhh

Obi-Wan flicks his eyes to the cameras in silent question before turning back to Ahsoka. “Well, if you need to call maintenance, then I hardly think you need my permission—”

“Thanks!” Ahsoka says quickly, and she’s about to disappear from the doorway when Obi-Wan stands up.

“Wait, Ahsoka, what exactly—”

Ahsoka re-appears at the doorway. “Oh, right,” she says. “Um—maybe just stay away from the men’s bathroom for a little bit.” She pauses.

“Actually, just stay away from them for the rest of the day.” She hovers by the door for a minute longer, and then she adds quickly, “And maybe also avoid the breakroom. Everything’s fine!”

And with a perfectly not-fine smile, Ahsoka disappears from the doorway.

Obi-Wan stares at where Ahsoka was just a moment ago, and the he turns to the cameras in disbelief. “Did she just—” Unable to finish his own sentence, Obi-Wan starts out the door. “Ahsoka?”

The camera follows Obi-Wan out of the conference room and into the breakroom. There are only muffled shouts—Anakin’s shouts, and then Rex’s, and then Ahsoka’s frantic “no, sorry, everything’s fine!”, and then Obi-Wan’s loud, “What is going on in here?”

surprise y’all just got a snippet i’m sorry can you tell i’m weirdly into this au?? i need to rewrite some scenes but uh there you go

Prompts: for the most part, yes! i have some stuff in my faq about prompts that i’ll probably turn down (mostly anything that’s...above a certain rating/really, realy heavy themes that i just don’t think i can tackle with justice or with enough education on my end). i can be a little slow with prompts, but i’ll get to all of them in time!

Upcoming Work You’re Most Excited About: uhhhh i have too many that i’m excited about. literally i can write a mini essay on every single one of the fics i’m working on? but uhhh i guess since i already talked about all my major longform fics above (asdfasdfsd didn’t mean to do that, i’m so sorry for everyone who had to scroll past that word-vomit), i guess the one i’m most excited about releasing is the post season 7 obi-wan-and-ahsoka-finally-talk-about-how-they-miss-each-other-also-sorry-for-fighting-with-you-i-know-you-were-just-trying-your-best fic. (not a whole ton of spoilers for this one, but uh. i’m looking at some of these scenes and making frustrated sounds because there’s this one particular instance where i’m like, ahsoka. ahsoka just talk to him just ta lk to him but then lol no talking :)) also maybe some h/c? lowkey sickfic might be involved in this somehow? might have accidentally served as a precursor to to these memories? help? this fic just ballooned. caroline keep your ideas contained challenge!)

No Pressure Tags: @lightasthesun @soplantyourownflowers @ohhellokenobiand anyone else who wants to join!

#tag game #thank you!!#caroline.....control your wips challenge #also i am so sorry this got sO long and SO OUT OF HAND #also....lol caroline stop writing so many longform fic challenge #i really love writing one-shots #i really really love writing one shots #but like also. also there's a part of me that's like 'im gonna hyperfixate on this au sO HARD'#thankfully tho i think those are all the longform wips #there's also that one time travel fix it longform fic i have in the back of my head....#but lol i still haven't outlined it yet

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yyxgin · 3 years

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no bar!! never fret about replying late. i know what it’s like to not want to talk to anyone. honestly. i won’t call it (my experience) a depressive episode bc one of my friends used to brush off me when i was saying things like i’m depressed and say ‘sad’ instead. like if i were to say ‘that made me/i am depressed’ she’d say something like ‘oh god same! like if it’s making you sad,, don’t do it.’ which is a v poor example of what she did but i never called it depressed after that bc she pissed me off n was disregarding of my feelings (even though she’s incredibly anxious herself) bc i didn’t get it officially diagnosed. idk if you’ve ever read about birth control pills but i always read on tumblr people calling them literal depression pills and i ignored it, thinking either 1) people were being dramatic / were over-dramatising it or 2) it wouldn’t happen to me anyway. it fucking happened and they were not being dramatic. i was never happy n always working on minimal sleep n making self depreciating jokes all the time bc it was the only way i could cope with my thoughts n constant mood swings. so what i’m trying to say is,, i know how it feels. if that’s any consolation. it’s not me trying to be ‘oh me too!’ or ‘mine was worse than you’ it’s just me being understanding n telling you it’s okay. also lemme at your friends!! i’ll stomp them out n get the barman to run them over for you!! they’re so mean to forget you!! i find that deciding i want to do something specific n then asking the appropriate people if they want to do saïd thing/place works for me. it can be a simple ‘we should do this, when are you free?’ helps. making it known that you want to do things helps. or aggressively remind them that it’s nice to be asked bc it means they thought of you even if you couldn’t go n tried to include you. or we can revisit me stomping them out w my beloved barman,,, whatever works best for you my dear <3

admittedly me and one of the girls were discussing that we are going to miss our manager. even though literally everyone moaned about her (i feel like it’s impossible to avoid in literally any job/situation) she did have her moments and she did a lot for the staff like after work-drinks, asking the chefs if we could order off of the customer menu instead of the staff menu or whatever they cook in bulk for everyone to take home in the evening. apparently she did this a lot more than the previous manager. she has a good heart but sometimes she ignored some of the girls when we ask for days off or our availability for the week which was very annoying of her. it could’ve been a lot worse, i suppose, but overall she wasn’t terrible.

thé lady who lives in my town and drops me given the chance, told me the other night that she used to be the duty manager. i asked her why she stopped and she explained that when they furloughed everyone they asked her to come back on like half pay or something? idk i just remember it being explained as they wanted her to come back sooner and take away her furlough so she said no and got demoted. but somehow she still gets some of the furlough? idk i have been taught that asking how much or discussing specifics of paychecks kind of thing is rude, growing up. she has been telling me they keep asking her to come back (now they’re asking her to be a supervisor since she declined the manager role) and she keeps saying no. i love her and want the best for her so i won’t say anything to anyone about the conversations me and her have had (i mean, apart from maybe my mum if i can remember, and you bc, let’s be real, you don’t know me and idk you) and she says they’re just difficult to work with as a management team. she even said our area manager isn’t impressed with our current assistant manager (who is currently the only person on an houred contract since our manager left) which shocked me since i personally think he is quite good considering he has a good relationship with the staff and kitchen (he’s thai so he can communicate with the kitchen better than most of the wait staff (some wait staff are thai but mostly not)) i think she doesn’t want to be the eldest person in management or she doesn’t want the age gap to be so big since she has a kid she can lecture at home, she doesn’t need to be looking after people at work, y’know?

also today, me and one of the girls were upstairs (two floors of the restaurant!) and it’s nearing 11pm and her brother (who also works there) comes up and asks us when we’re finishing (mostly her lol) but we had two tables just sitting talking amongst themselves so she just said idk. he was saying he wanted to go bc he’s tired etc n he’s driving n she was like it’s fine go home i’ll call an uber or something n he was refusing to leave her behind. (i feel like i brushed over the two tables sitting there but it must be noted they’re the only tables left in the entire restaurant and we were the only two wait staff still there, apart from her brother but he changed and was waiting downstairs). anyway, she was sweeping (i was cleaning the booth/sofa thingy chairs as it was a mundane task we could do to pass time and while she was sweeping by one of the tables thé boyfriend was whispering to his girlfriend saying ‘should we go?’ and the girlfriend said ‘why should i care?’ and the girl came over to tell me v quietly and i got so upset for her. bc she is literally the sweetest person on the earth and the only reason i didn’t go to ask the manager to see if i could go home with the lady who offers to take me (ex-duty manager lady!) was so she wasn’t alone up there. if i had been the one sweeping near that table i would’ve snapped so fucking hard at them. i mean, we’re 18 and have lives and sleep schedules, and we’re working until 11pm on a thursday before we even get home?? like i wouldn’t have minded staying if they were reasonable tables but after the gf said that i was like ‘shall i go get our stuff from the staff room?’ so i could split as fast as possible. in the end the temporary acting manager came up and told us we could finish and she kicked the tables out ten minutes later. i told her what the table saïd and she thought that was mean and unnecessary too. i was also worried about my sleep tonight since i have my first vaccine tomorrow morning. that’s why i was more pressed about what time i left work today. oh well.

im sorry for talking so much about work! sometimes i don’t have someone to talk to about it (at home) bc of my weird hours and sometimes i don’t like re-explaining things to my mum if she doesn’t get it the first seven times. sometimes it’s just a little too draining as she doesn’t understand since she’s a lifer at her job. it’s easier to explain to my dad but then i get a whole lecture on something that i ultimately have no control over n id rather just bitch w the girls at work but the problem is WE’RE AT WORK!!!

also i booked for my first tattoo!! i’m excited. it’s for next week,, which was super quick considering i was expecting to have to wait soooo much longer. i’ve been telling people about it and that it’s happening but i haven’t had the pleasure of telling people exactly where i got the idea from. bar, my dear, you know wheein’s new album, redd? well, it comes with loads of things, including these stickers (one for each song) and the one from springtime was just so perfect and when i saw it my first thought was, this would be a perfect tattoo. and so i am having it tattooed on my body. a subtle nod to kpop whilst also having something meaningful on my body. i also have just decided i want a small, minimalistic (or one-line art) rose on my sternum, kind of in the valley of my breasts, bc my nan was a rose. i like having her close to me. i recently got her necklace fixed which has left me feeling so incomplete after it broke in august last year. it’s been almost ten years and i think i’m long overdue something to remind me of her. i fiddle with my necklace when i’m nervous which is why i love it so much but incase it breaks again (i pray it doesn’t but i have a long life ahead of me) i would like her close still.

gosh there’s never enough space in my head to remember what i want to tell you so i’ll stop here for now since i should sleep to be able to wake up in time for my first jab. i’m scared but it’s whatever i’ll do it i suppose,, eeek 😨

ilyl ~ 🌻

thank you so much for opening up to me about this, it means a lot to me :( i am so sorry you had to go through this and honestly,, i really resonate with you. i feel like when i talk about my emotions and my sadness (dont know if its okay to call it depression either but yea), my friend either always either makes me feel like my emotions arent valid or she tells me she doesnt know how to help, which is frankly, why i dont talk about my emotions to people irl anymore. i dont open up and it takes me a long long time to do so if i ever do, because i tend to feel insecure/not safe :D so really, thank you for telling me and i hope you are doing better. your emotions are valid and i am always here for you

HAHAHA i mean i dont have many friends so theres not many to stomp on:( but i mean,, i get passive aggressive when i feel forgotten/left out so you best believe i told my friend how im feeling, but like uhhh it didnt do much. i spent the whole weekend at work and i was free on friday but my friend decided to ditch me and yeah. i havent been out in like two weeks now and i mean i am an introvert so i dont mind that much but even i want to socialise sometimes

aah i mean every manager has their flaws, no one’s perfect. my manager keeps calling me to go to work even though i was literally there for 11 hours on saturday AND sunday which means i worked for 20 hours in two days. and i work 20 hours a week at max. and i already worked some hours before the weekend so i think i have like 30 hours now and she keeps calling??? dude i need a break too,,i am so exhausted and tired of this shit :dd

oh i totally get what the lady that drops you off sometimes told you. i would feel a little iffy if i heard it too, but like,,,judge by your own experiences!! if you feel like something is off, you can always leave,, so i wouldn’t be so stressed about it.

why are people so rude ??? dude,,you should care, because we are all human. everyone has their needs and their lives and i bet he wouldnt like it if he was the one in your place. why should you stay there longer just because he didnt want to leave?? that was so unnecessary. people are weird beings and i learnt that after working with them this weekend,,,like i litereally got screamed at because i couldnt accept cash in different currency. like,,what tf do you want me to do?? i dont have every single currency with me so i could give u the change ?? tf ??

ALSO ITS OKAY TALK ABOUT YOUR WORK HOWEVER MUCH YOU WANT !!!! i also feel like i dont have anyone to talk to about work bc my parents dont listen to me as much as they used to these days and my friend unsurprisingly just doesnt care bc she doesnt work,, and i dont wanna talk to my internet friends abt it as much bc i feel annoying so i am glad us two can talk about these things together !!!!

YOUR FIRST TATTOOOO WHOAAAH thats so cool. i love tattoos hihi dfkja idk if u already had the appointment but tell me how it went after !! i wasnt able to find the sticker on the internet but im sure it looks hella pretty. also i love how it reminds you both of kpop and your grandma, its wonderful <3 i really want to get a tattoo one day,, and i also want something meaningful (not that i am hating on people that tattoo themselves just for fun and have no meaning behind their tattoos i just have commitment issues so i want something long lasting). alSO my crush (yes i have a crush now ew) has a tattoo and it looks like satan lowkey,,but apparently its a japanese something (i forgot the word oopsies) and it means jealousy, bad past and wisdom ?? i was like BOY IF U DONT??? fjdkla he has blue hair btw i am very much whipped but he also doesnt know me and i am older than him so this is embarrassing

ALSO I HOPE YOURE FEELING WELL AFTER GETTING THE VACCINE !!!

ily <333

#💌ask #🌻 anon

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mirkwoodshewolf · 5 years

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The baby’s here!!; Queen x reader

*Author’s note*

Okay gang here we go. The last chapter I’ve got for you all and it’s probably one of my favorites, here we have the arrival of baby Kline. So as with all childbirth fics there is child labor, doctors, swearing and all that jazz. There’s also intense FLUFF so viewers discretion is advised lol. There’s also maybe a tiny bit of angst if you squint towards the end but I hope you all enjoy these two fics :)

Taglist:

@psychosupernatural

@plethora-of-things

@ixchel-9275

@onebigfangirlworld

@waddles03

@coolcxt

@geek-and-proud

@queendeakyy

@mr-badguymercury

@platawnic

@naturalswifty89

@queens-rose-garden

@starswin

@dj-lowkey

@isabella-bby

@labessieisallama

@5sos-wdw

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*November 20th, 1985*

ARRRRAAAGGGHHHH!!!! That’s it I can’t take it anymore! Someone get me some pliers and help breach this kid out of me! Nine months and one week later, I’m overdue. I’d thought at least by now if not a month early they’d be born but nope! I was lying in my bed permanently on bedrest all because of Jack. There was a knock at my bedroom door and I snapped.

“What!?” Peeking in was Jack.

“Hey babe, the guys are here.” I calmed down and I said.

“Bring them in, and Jack,” he stopped and looked at me. “I’m sorry for snapping.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. I’m anxious too. I’ll bring everyone up.” He then left the room and after a few short moments of silence by myself, my boys along with Freddie’s partner Jim Hutton, and the girls Veronica, Dominique and Chrissie came on in. They all greeted me and I waved to them.

“How are you feeling (y/n)?” Roger asked. I gave him a look before looking to Dominique. She nodded and gave Roger a slap over the head making him cry in pain.

“Don’t worry love, my sister was once overdue by three weeks, you’re on the lucky side.” Chrissie said as she came over to me and rubbed my shoulder.

“Yeah but I want this baby to come out! I’m cranky! I can barely move! I can’t even get my slippers on by myself anymore!” I sobbed out.

“Has the doctor given you anything to help?” asked Deacy.

“Yes and we’ve tried it all. Spicy food, herbal teas, sex, nothing’s helped.” Explained Jack. The boys looked shocked to hear Jack say sex so casually as he just did.

“It was medically proven guys, she told us nine times out of ten that’s always sped up late births.” I explained.

“Well maybe this might help you love,” Jim said as he handed me a box. “It’s an herbal tea recipe my mum took from when she was pregnant with me. I was a week late just like your bearing is, she drank this and next minute out I pop.”

“At this point I’ll try anything. Thanks Jim.” I thanked. I opened the box and gave the stuff to Jack and he said he’d make it, Jim went down to help him prepare it. As I sat there in the bed, I moaned in discomfort and it was at that moment Brian came up and helped me sit up and he gave me a gentle massage. “Oh Brian you are a saint.”

“No problem love, Chrissie had backaches all the time with our kids.”

“And you were always there to help make the pain all the bearable.” Chrissie said as she came up to her husband and kissed his cheek while Brian kept massaging me.

“Tea’s ready.” We heard Jack say. Brian got up and helped me lay back down as Jack handed me my favorite tea mug and I drank it. It took every ounce of me to not spit it out because god did it taste strong, plus I think there might’ve been tar in it or something vile. But I drank another sip before setting the mug down.

“Helping any?” asked Freddie.

“I don’t know, I mean I wish that my water could just magically break right now but that’s impossible. It—oh! Oh my god…..” I suddenly felt something.

“What? What is it are you okay?” Jack immediately came up to me and took my hand. I sat there tensed up feeling the pain continuing and I turned to him and said.

“I think my water just broke.”

“You—you sure?”

“I think….oh yeah that’s a contraction! Ahhh!!” I began to scream in pain and in an instant the girls took control. Veronica was the first to proclaim.

“Okay people this is not a drill! John start the car!” John immediately did as his wife said and raced down to get the car started.

“Jack you packed an overnight bag right?” asked Dominque. Jack nodded and said, “Good boy grab that and put it in the car.” Jack ran off to grab the bag.

“Brian, you and Roger call the hospital tell them the Rock Angel is having her baby and she specifically requires a private room.” Brian nodded then he and Roger ran out of the bedroom.

“Okay (y/n) sweetie, Dominique and I will coach you on your breathing, okay I need you to do your breathing exercises you’ve been learning in your classes, can you do that?” asked Veronica.

“I think so.” I whimpered as another contraction hit and I let out a cry in pain.

“Freddie, Jim help me sit her up.” She said. Soon both Freddie and Jim gently and slowly helped me out of my bed and stood me up. Veronica and Dominque took their places at my sides and they each coached me through my breathing as we walked out of the bedroom and toward John and Veronica’s car.

“That’s it sweetie you’re doing great, okay we’re at the car now.” Dominique said as she opened the door and I was put in the backseat. Veronica then got in on the other side while Dominique closed my door and she raced back towards her car.

“Okay John let’s get going!” John put the car in drive and soon we left our small flat and raced towards the hospital.

Finally we arrived at London’s hospital. My doctor, Dr. Sharon Crabgrass stood there with a wheelchair ready to take me around the back way of the hospital so that way I wouldn’t draw a crowd of people and create more stress than I already was in.

Deacy, Veronica and Jack helped me out of the car and Dr. Crabgrass said.

“Finally ready to become a mother Mrs. Kline?”

“Oh you have no idea doc, although I wish this last week hadn’t happened though.” I said.

“Been a little irritable?”

“You could say that.” I stated sarcastically. I was helped into my wheelchair and she asked me.

“How far are the contractions?”

“The one we counted just now was 15 seconds apart.” I then let out a scream and I yelled out.

“15 SECONDS MY ARSE!!!”

“Okay we’ll take you in and see just how much dilation you have and see if you’re ready to go straight to the delivery room.” She said. I was then wheeled into the private room that we had reserved in advance. Veronica stayed at my side along with Jack and she told me one final time.

“You’re gonna be fine sweetie, soon you’ll hold that beautiful baby in your arms and your whole world will change forever.” I smiled and thanked her as she now stopped and it was just Jack, Dr. Crabgrass and I heading to the delivery room.

Unfortunately I wasn’t ready to go into the delivery room because I was only just 3cm apart in dilation. So now I was in my private room with Jack suffering through contraction after contraction, while every now and then Dr. Crabgrass would come in and check to see if anything’s changed.

10 hours have passed and I still had no baby. It was now pitch black outside at 9:45pm. A knock was heard and peeking in was Freddie and Jim.

“May we come in darling?” asked Freddie.

“Of course my Freddie, you both can come in.” Following behind him was Jim.

“Still no luck?” asked Jim.

“No, apparently I’ve only dilated to only 4cm. for the entire 10 hours I’ve been here!” I snapped. God I can’t believe I’ve only dilated a cm. a fuckin centimeter for this entire day!

“I’m sorry love.” Jim said solemnly.

“What? What are you sorry for? Jim, come here.” He came over to me and I took his hand and told him as I looked him straight in the eye. “Without that tea, I’d still be suffering a late delivery. Your mum’s tea is magic, thank you for giving it to me.” He smiled and said.

“You’re welcome (y/n).” I smiled when suddenly I was hit with another contraction.

“Oh shit not another one!”

“Okay remember just breathe. Breathe.” Jack took my hand and I squeezed it as hard as I could as I breathed rapidly and cried in pure agony.

This time however this was a big one as I threw my head back and cried out. Freddie came over and took my other hand and soon I was squeezing both their hands with an iron grip while Jim came up to me and wiped my sweaty forehead with a wet towel.

“Oh god please tell me I’m at 10 fucking centimeters now!”

“I’ll get the doctor.” Jim said as he raced out of the room and I continued to whimper and scream in agony.

“It’ll be alright my little Rock angel, you’re doing great love.” Freddie tried to assure me but I snapped at him.

“NOT HELPING FRED!!” Soon Jim came in with Dr. Crabgrass and I told her. “Oh please doc you’ve got to give me some drugs I can’t take this anymore! Please tell me I’m ready to go to the delivery room.”

“Unfortunately you’re still not ready. You’re now up to 5cm.” she said. I looked at her like she had two heads as rage boiled inside me.

“You’re joking right?” I stated lowly.

“I’m afraid not Mrs. Kline, but you’re half way there. We’ll keep checking in on you. What you just experienced was the mid-way contraction. It’s usually bigger than the normal contractions you have, telling you that you’re halfway there.”

“Well it sure as hell didn’t feel like I was halfway there.”

“I’ll check on you in another hour, hopefully you’ll be ready to deliver soon.” With that she left. I collapsed back into the bed and wept. Jack kissed my forehead and I said.

“Why don’t they want to come out?” Jack stroked my cheek and kissed my forehead again and he said.

“You know what I think? I think that you’ve made such a good home for them for the past nine months that they….just don’t want to leave you.” I looked at him with a precious smile as I said.

“Aww look at you making up shit to make me feel better.” I patted his cheek before turning towards Freddie and Jim and I told them. “You guys must be so tired of staying in a hospital, why don’t you and the rest of the guys just go home and rest?”

“And leave you behind in a hospital I don’t think so dear.” Freddie sassed.

“Fred it’s been over 10 hours, come on I’d hate for you to stay in a hospital for god knows how long.”

“Hey,” he gently cupped my face with his hand and he said, “We are not leaving you our Rock angel. We all agreed to stay here until that baby is born. We’re with you darling, right till the end. I already missed your wedding, I promised myself to not miss the birth of your first child.” I smiled happily at him and he kissed the top of my head and he turned to Jim and said, “Come on Jim, let’s leave them alone for a bit and give the others the update.” He then turned to us and continued, “try and get some sleep later on. The both of you.”

“We’ll try, thanks Freddie.” Said Jack and with that Jim and Freddie left our room.

For the rest of the night and into the next morning, I was now well-over the 24hr marker of my laboring and I was going stir-crazy. As I lay there in bed with Jack still at my bedside and this time Deacy and Veronica were in with us this morning.

“How long has it really been?”

“We’ve just passed the 30hr mark.” Answered Deacy as he looked down at his watch.

“You’re a hero honey” said Veronica as she rubbed my shoulder.

“I sure as hell don’t feel like one. God I just want this baby out of me I can’t take the pain anymore!” I sobbed out. She leaned her head on top of mine as she continued to rub my shoulder trying to console me. It was then Dr. Crabgrass came in and she said.

“How are we feeling Mrs. Kline?”

“God Doc you’ve got to do whatever it takes get some firewood and smoke it out, get a crane I don’t care just please get it out of me!” She then came up to me and checked me out and that’s when she said.

“Well it seems you no longer have to wait anymore.” I looked at her and thought I was hearing her.

“What now?” I asked.

“10cm at 30 hours later, you’re about to become a mum.” I turned to Jack and he smiled happily at me and I turned to Veronica and she smiled down at me and she kissed my forehead and she said.

“Welcome to the club darling, you’re gonna do great.”

“Come on darling, let’s inform the others.” Deacy said as he took his wife’s hand and soon a couple nurses came in and I was wheeled over to the delivery room.

I was moved onto the metal table that had piles of pillows stacked on top of one another. Dr. Crabgrass got on her blue overcoat and rubber gloves and a nurse assisted her and I was told to push as hard as I could at any time a contraction hit me.

I don’t even know how long it was that I was in the delivery room for but I was currently pushing as Jack was keeping a tight grip on my left knee as I had my legs up while Dr. Crabgrass kept telling me to push. I grunted and panted heavily as sweat poured down my face.

“Push, push. Okay we’re gonna push for 5 more seconds. Five….four….”

“3 2 1! Gah!!” I cried out as I stopped pushing and I lay back exhausted.

“Okay now the next contraction should be in about 20 seconds.” She said as she backed away from my vagina that was trying to push a Saint Bernard out.

“Ohh I can’t do this. I can’t do this anymore Jack!” I sobbed to him.

“Hey, it’s gonna be alright you’re doing great just a few more big pushes and….” I interrupted him as I felt another contraction hit me as I snarled out.

“AHHH GOD 20 SECONDS MY ARSE!!!”

“Here we go! Okay keep pushing. Push.” All the while Jack held onto me as I tried to push harder. “Wait, wait, I see something.” She said in a concerned tone.

“What is it what do you see? Oh my god!” Jack proclaimed in shock.

“Don’t say oh my god! Oh my god what?!”

“What is that?” asked Jack.

“It’s the baby’s buttock it’s breached.” Dr. Crabgrass explained.

“Oh thank god I thought it had two heads.”

“Wait, wait…..is the baby gonna be okay?”

“The baby will be fine but it’s in a more difficult position so you’re gonna have to push even harder now, go.” I then began to push as hard as I could. “Mrs. Kline you’re gonna have to push even harder nothing’s happening.”

“I’m sorry I can’t! I can’t!” I sobbed out.

“Hey, hey look at me if you can perform before a sold out Madison Square Garden show four years ago, you can do this.” Jack said as he looked me square in the eye.

“I can’t Jack I can’t, please you do it for me!” I wept. Jack shook his head and said as he adjusted himself and said.

“Come on you can do this just one more big push on three, okay? One….two…three!” I then shot up and pushed as hard as I could. But as I did, I actually headbutt my husband and he fell to the ground.

“Good!” Dr. Crabgrass said.

“Keep pushing!” Jack called out.

“Are you okay love?!” I cried out in pain. He sat up rubbing his forehead as he said.

“You have no idea how much this hurts.” At that comment both Dr. Crabgrass and I turned towards him. I was almost about to strangle him. He had no idea what real pain felt like. “Keep going! Keep going!” He said learning his mistake and came up and held onto me as I kept pushing. I let out a scream as I pushed and the doctor said.

“Here we go!”

“It’s upside down but its coming.” Jack assured me. I let out a cry as I threw my head back and soon I could hear faint whimpering. “Oh my god, it’s here. Our baby’s here.” Jack said in wonder. I opened my eyes and soon Dr. Crabgrass held up a tiny and slightly bloody baby. “Oh my god it’s….it’s a girl.” Jack said.

Both Jack and I were in awe at the sight of our first baby being a girl. She was so beautiful.

“Aww she’s so tiny.” I cooed out. Dr. Crabgrass smiled at us before taking our baby away. I went from laughing to whimpering out sadly, “Where’d she go? Where’d my baby go?”

“It’s okay she’s just wrapping her up.” Jack assured me.

“Okay but be careful with her she’s really tiny.” I said. Jack and I looked at each other happily and that’s when Dr. Crabgrass said as she presented our baby girl.

“Here she is.” Right after that our daughter started to cry. I held her in my arms, all thanks to the practice that Dominque, Veronica and Chrissie gave me as I softly bounced my baby girl in my arms and cooed out.

“Hi, you~ aww thanks for coming out of me when I drank Jim’s tea. Ohhh I know poppet. Yes~” It was then my baby girl opened her eyes up at me. Her eyes the same color as mine. “Ahh she’s looking at me. Hi….I know you.” I sobbed out happily before cooing at her once more smiling widely.

“Do we have a name yet?” asked Dr. Crabgrass.

“No not yet.” I said.

“That’s fine. For now we’ll just call her baby girl Kline.” I looked to Jack and he couldn’t stop fawning over his new born baby girl. He stroked her tiny head and kept kissing it before finally looking up at me. We smiled at each other and he leaned forward and caught my lips with his in a gentle kiss. As we separated he kissed my forehead before getting comfortable by my bedside as we admired our beautiful baby girl.

“Hello baby girl.” I said.

We were now in a recovery room, Jack taking pictures of me and our baby girl together. I can’t believe she’s finally here, our little girl. 6lbs 11oz 21 inches long after over 36hrs in labor she’s finally graced us from heaven. I touched her rosy cheek with my index finger as I looked up at Jack and couldn’t stop smiling.

He kissed my temple and he said.

“God I can’t believe she’s finally here.”

“I know.”

“She looks so much like you.” He said. I looked up at him and that’s when we heard a voice say.

“Can we come in?” We both turned around and there peeking through the door of our room was Brian. We nodded and soon slowly pouring in was the entire Queen family. They all cooed and awed at the sight of my baby girl.

“There she is.” Said Roger.

“Ohh she’s so beautiful.” Veronica cooed. I smiled at her and I said.

“You wanna hold her first?” She nodded enthusiastically and I gently gave Veronica my baby girl. She almost cried with tears of joy as she said.

“Oh my god, she’s amazing. I’m so glad you guys finally had sex.” Deacy came up to her and she gave him our daughter. Deacy smiled happily and I did see a couple of tears fall down his face as he said.

“No matter how many times I’ve already been through this, I still can never get enough of holding a newborn baby in my arms.” I smiled at Deacy and felt tears form in my eyes.

He then transferred my daughter to Roger and he gingerly held my baby girl in his arms. He was all smiles and in awe, seeing him be so tender towards my daughter.

“She’s so beautiful, just like her mum.” he said as he looked to me while Dominque cooed and awed at my girl in his arms.

“Okay my turn, my turn.” Freddie said as he held out his arms. Since Freddie stood on my right and Roger was to my left, the two of them did a careful exchange just over the foot of the bed as I could hear Roger say.

“There go to your uncle Freddie love,” as Freddie now held my daughter he was all gushy with love as he cooed out.

“Aww you’re as cute as a button darling, ohh I could just stick you in my pocket and take you away.” I gave him my best stank eye already feeling the protective mother instincts take over me. He looked at me and he said, “I won’t.” I shook my head at him. Then finally Freddie gave my daughter to Brian and he got to have the chance to hold her. Him and Chrissie stood over my baby, Chrissie cooing as she stroked her tiny head.

“Roger is right, she has her mother’s eyes and cute little nose.” I held the tissue up to my eyes as I sniffled.

“Aww honey what’s wrong?” asked Chrissie as she now turned towards me and stroked my head.

“Nothing Chrissie, I’m sorry I just can’t stop crying.”

“It’s completely natural love, with all the hormones plus you’re sleep deprived. We all went through it when we had our kids.” Veronica said.

“So what? I bet you guys are all sleep deprived. I don’t see any of you crying hysterically because you put your slippers on the wrong feet.” I choked out as I dabbed underneath my eyes. My head soon sunk as I began crying and I whimpered out, “Ahh fuck.”

“What’s the matter now?” asked Deacy concerned.

“I was reliving it!” I sobbed. Everyone awed at me and Jack held me close and kissed the top of my head.

“So do you know what you’re gonna call her?” Brian said as he gave me back my baby girl.

“Wait a minute it’s not going to be baby girl? I thought that was so original.” Freddie said. It was then Jack said.

“Well we talked about it and we’ve finally came up with one.”

“And since I’m too emotional right now, why don’t you be the one to announce it to them Jack darling.” I said as I held my baby girl in my arms. Jack smiled beyond thrilled that he was to announce the name of our daughter.

“Wow okay, umm…..everyone.” He leaned down and touched his daughter’s head and said, “We’d like you to meet our daughter, Kelly Michelle Kline.” They all fawned over the name and greeted our daughter with warm smiles and gentle touches.

A few hours later, everyone went to get some food in their stomachs and a nurse had come in with some food for me as well as teaching me how to breastfeed my baby. It took a little bit but Kelly managed to latch on and I got her to drink.

Currently now she was sleeping in her little incubator bed right by my side when I heard the door open and coming in was Roger.

“How you doing (y/n)?”

“Fine, fine come on in honey.” He came in and softly closed the door behind him. He came over Kelly and smiled down at her faintly tickled her.

“God I still can’t get over the fact that she looks so much like you.”

“Yeah.” I said softly. He looked at me concerned and he said.

“What’s the matter?”

“Nothing.” I said as I wiped some tears away.

“What is it, hey?”

“Really Roger its nothing just hormonal that’s…..”

“(Y/n) come on, it’s me. Now give me the truth.” I looked up at him with my sad eyes. His entire face showed that he knew something was wrong with me, his “(y/n)” sense he calls it. I looked at him before turning away and I said.

“It’s just that…..I never thought I’d end up raising this baby by myself.”

“What are you talking about? Are you and Jack having problems?”

“No, no Roger that’s not what I meant. I meant that…..if we ever did have a problem we have Jack’s mother and step-father to turn to. Kelly will have one pair of grandparents to look after her, but I….I just wish my parents were still here to see this day. They’ve always talked about being grandparents one day. You know?” I turned to Roger and he looked at me and said.

“Yeah, I do.”

“I just so scared that I’m gonna mess up my daughter’s life, whether being busy with my career or…..being like my aunt. I sound pretty dumb right now huh?”

“No, no you don’t, hey,” Roger said as he came up to me and took my hand in both of his. We stared into each other’s eyes as he continued, “Now you listen to me; You are never ever, ever gonna be like her, okay? You’re sweet, you’re kind, you’ve got a warm heart, and you always support those that you love. You’re not alone, and if you ever need someone to call to help with Kelly. I’m just an ocean away but I can be there, like that.” He quietly snapped at his last statement as he kept a good strong yet gentle grip on my hand.

“Roger Meddows Taylor, what would I ever do without you?” I said as he opened up my hand and kissed the center of my palm, our own personal kiss we give to one another whenever we feel upset or alone.

He brought my hand to my heart as he pulled me close and I leaned against his chest listening to his heartbeat.

“You never have to wonder about that darling.” I sniffled as he kissed the top of my head and kept me in his arms for what felt like forever.

And it was at that moment I felt like it was time to ask him.

“Roger,”

“Mm?” he hummed as he gingerly stroked my back. I separated from him and he sat down in front of me and I said.

“There’s something else I need to tell you.” He looked at me concerned and he said.

“What’s wrong you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah it’s not what you’re thinking. I’m perfectly healthy, I just wanted to ask you something, and it’s really, really important.”

“What is it?”

“Well, for the past five years, geez it feels longer than that,” we both laughed softly as I continued, “From day one, you’ve always looked after me. Between you and the guys, you’ve always been the one to be there for me for everything. You’ve seen me at my lowest breaking point, and there to keep me grounded in the spotlight. You’ve been my shoulder to cry on and my confidant. Which is why I wanted to be the one to ask you…..if you’ll be Kelly’s godfather.”

His face turned to pure shock.

He looked toward Kelly before looking back at me and I smiled at him hoping for a yes from him.

“Me?” he stammered out.

“No the other Roger Taylor, of course you yah dolt!”

“But I—I would’ve thought you would’ve chosen Deacy.”

“Well Jack did want him to be the godfather. But I told him that if our baby was a girl, then there’s only one man that I knew who could not only be fiercely protective of her, but give her all the love she needed. Because that’s what he did for her mum.” I cupped his cheek in my hand.

Tears fell down his face and I wiped them away for him and he said.

“I’d be honored.” I smiled happily at him and we both embraced each other tightly crying in pure happiness.

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years

Text

Survey #234

“don’t take care of me - be scared of me.”

Does it bother you when people beg? I mean, it depends on the consistency, intensity, and the subject. Do you ever eat cookie dough raw? I have, but salmonella will punish me some day. Are you one of those people who are always cold? I am the exact opposite. When was the last time you rode a rollercoaster? Pf, never. Don't want to. Do you like hot dogs? I hate the fact that I love them lol. Do you have any weird rings? I wouldn't consider any "weird," no. Have any bad addictions? Ugh, caffeine. Are you anything like your siblings? I am very, very different from my two immediate sisters. Ma says I'm extremely similar to Katie, my half-sister, though it's odd because we don't seem to agree on very much? I don't even think she likes me. When was the last time you shaved your legs? Literally not since like... February. It's not like anybody but family sees my legs anyway. It's just stupid societal expectations for a woman, and I've never been prone to obeying those to begin with. Do you like long bike rides? I used to LOVE riding my bike when I lived in the woods/by an almost-dead road, but I haven't that in... god, years. I don't even have that bike anymore. My knees would never, EVER survive riding one right now. Do you know someone who is blind? My sister is in one eye, but I can't remember which. Do you have a YouTube account? how else would I like every Mark video in existence and I wish I was kidding?????????????? How many cell phones have you had? No clue. Not many. Maybe like, four or so. When was the last time something bothered you? Yesterday 'cuz I was getting weird fuckin phone calls. Do you ever try free samples at the store? Sure, if they seem like something I'd like. Can you speak French or Spanish? No. What school year do you think will be/was the saddest? 8th. Anxiety and depression were getting bad, puberty was A Thing, confused about life in general and why all this sadness and fear was happening to me. Do you like boys with long hair? I mean this depends on the person, but in general, yes. I think I prefer it over shorter, in most cases. Have you ever had plum juice? No, but that sounds decent. If I can even remember what a plum tastes like... I loved them as a kid, haven't had one in like, years. Have you ever passed out? Once, almost twice not long after the first time. Was today someones birthday that you know? No. Have you drank any water today? A little bit. When was the last time you had a crowd at your house? Holy shit. Probably not since we MOVED here in '17. Are you worried about anything right now? When aren't I at least a bit worried about something, really. Are you keeping anything from your best friends right now? No. Do you currently have any mosquito bites? Not currently. A- blood, hell yeah man. Do you have Twitter? Yes. Literally to like. um. one somebody's stuff. If you found out you were pregnant, who would you tell? God FUCKING forbid. Obviously my family. Sara. If it was from consensual sex, I'd tell friends eventually. If it was, uh, any other way, probably not EVEN some family because there are some that would probably never speak to me again if I got an abortion. Is your driveway stone or pavement? Stone. Have you ever caught something on fire? Yeah. Y'know, s'mores, sparklers, wood when making a bonfire or something. Regular stuff. How many people have you kissed in a car? One or two. Idr if Sara and I ever have. Do you and your best friend have an inside joke? "buzzfeed" Do you have a gym membership? Not anymore. How long was your last shower? Not even ten minutes. Get clean and get out. What is your favorite color fingernail polish? I think red tends to be the prettiest. If you had to get a tattoo, what would it be of? Man, don't ask me this. I have a billion ideas. If I had the money for it though, I'd probably finally get this (Denialism) as a tat on my left upper arm next. It's like, my favorite drawing ever, and I've already gotten the artist's permission. What is the best fast food place, in your opinion? Sonic has had my heart lately. What is your favorite eye color in the opposite sex? I just generally like vibrant and/or light blue eyes, but I really don't care about someone's eye color. What is your mom’s maiden name? Yeah, let's share that on the Internet. Would you rather receive balloons or flowers for valentine’s day? Flowers. Balloons are nothing but waste and wind up as litter anyway. Do you follow the crowd when it comes to trends or do your own thing? Do my own thing. Trends 'n shit don't matter to me; I don't care how "cool" or "uncool" something is. I like what I like. What is your worst bad habit? Assuming the worst of absolutely everything within .01 seconds. Do you believe in happily ever after? No. Things aren't always gonna be happy, sorry. What is your average phone bill? I don't know, Dad pays it. Which is better: chapstick or lip gloss? Chapstick. Have you ever been proposed to? No. Do you take certain medicine on a daily basis? A decent number. Have you ever seen two people together and you got sick to your stomach? I remember seeing a picture of Jason and his girlfriend after me once after they got together and I. Don't know how to describe that feeling. I think I felt more murderous than anything. Do you prefer laptops or desktop computers? Laptops for portability's sake. Have you ever had a really bad haircut? Looking back, the haircut I had before this one wasn't great. Only at some angles did it look good. I mean I don't regret it though, it's how I realized I think I'd like short hair. Did you ever order any clothes from the Alloy catalog? Never heard of them. What brand, color, and type is your favorite eyeliner? I love black eyeliner, but I don't have any favorite brands. I hate liquid, though. My hands aren't steady enough for that, and it's just messy. What’s your favorite type of yogurt? Meh, not a big fan. Idk. Do you have any overdue library books right now? No. Do you have a piggy bank? No. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? Nope. Do you own plaid pants? No. Have you ever had to wear a school uniform? Yeah, through all of middle school. What was your high school’s mascot? A firebird. Who were your best friends in high school? I had various ones. Excluding The Ex, there was Hannia, Alon, Megan, Maria, Girt... There was a few. Have you ever been to Chicago? Once, with Sara and her dad. At night. And the lights and cars and shops and towers and everything was too much for my rural ass. I'm not a city person, but because it was SO different and just incredible in scope and all, I still thought it was absolutely beautiful and so exciting. Would you rather sleep on the top bunk or bottom bunk? Bottom. When my sister and I were little and shared a room though, I almost always had the top bunk. As I got older though, that inverted. Have you ever had a secret admirer that left you notes? I THINK Aaron did once, but I can't remember for sure. Are you close with your cousins? No. Are you close to any aunts or uncles? Not especially, but only because, like my cousins, I pretty much never see them. Are you close to your grandparents? All but one is dead, and that one is dying. Barely knew any, save for my remaining grandmother, and we've never gotten along well/agreed on much, but I mean, I still care for her. I also pretty much never saw her. Who betrayed your trust? Plenty of people. Who was your first best friend (apart from a sibling)? Brianna. What was your favorite thing to do at sleepovers when you were younger? I don't know. Probably play make-believe or go swimming. What kind of popcorn is your favorite? Normal with butter and salt. Does your town have a big fountain in it? The next town over does. What is your town known for? "You mean Tennessee?" Don't think that's too much of a giveaway. What’s one way in which you’re still a child? I am very dependent on Mom. What’s one way in which you’re old? My knees are at least 107. Do you know what you want to do for your next birthday? gooooooood take me to get a tatTOOOOOOO What would be the best surprise you could receive right now? Mom buying tickets to the Ozzy concert next year alksdjfalwe. I've been losing my fucking mind since the new single came out and album was announced. Do you usually forgive when someone hurts your or try to get revenge? I'm not a vengeful person at all, really. I tend to forgive. Were there any subjects in school that were really easy for you? English has always been a breeze, and usually science. Did you ever skip a grade or get held back a grade? No. Do you think you look better with dyed hair or natural hair? Just about anyone looks better with dyed hair to me. I just like colorful, interesting hair. Has your hair color changed since you were a toddler? Yes. I was born dirty blonde. Do you own an American flag shirt? No. Do you own a British flag shirt? No. Do you have a seashell collection? No. We used to have a box of them, though. Do you have a rock collection? No. What is your favorite thing to do in the pool? Just chill. Casually swim around aimlessly. Cacti or seashells? Hmmmm. I think seashells, but that's tough. Dreamcatcher or wind chimes? MAN, this depends on the design. Have you ever taken a picture at the perfect moment? The only one I have that I consider the absolute *perfect* moment was at Ashley's gender reveal when she and her husband found out the baby is a girl. Her face especially is priceless. What color was your first car? N/A Was your first car used or new? N/A What was the last thing you said in complete caps? HAHAHA I sent Sara a fucking CURSED picture of Pennywise as a good morning text. Do you enjoy playing board games? Not really. Are you good at playing Hide and Go Seek? I guess I was as a kid. I'm sure I wouldn't be now. Elephants can't really hide. :^) Do you live in an apartment or a house? A house. Is there a music artist that never ceases to amaze you? As far as truly *amaze* goes, probably Amy Lee. Her voice is just fucking incredible. What is your favorite term of endearment? Probably "love." Or "dear." I dunno. Do you like Twizzlers? NO. They're gross as hell. Do you sneak in candy/soda when you go to the movies? Yeup. Fuck those prices. What was the last song you had on repeat? I adore Ozzy's new "Under The Graveyard" beyond words and so have been binging it like mad since yesterday lmao. Where are your favorite pair of jeans from? I don't have jeans. Do you tap your foot when you listen to music? No. If I respond to it in any voluntary way, I'll most likely be tapping my hand with the beat. Will you get your hair cut anytime soon? I need to, yeah. I hate when my hair starts getting long enough to curl a tad upwards in the back. Are you uncoordinated? VERY. Have you ever listened to Jane’s Addiction? I know and enjoy "Jane Says" and "Been Caught Stealing." What’s the worst thing you’ve ever experienced? Heartbreak. What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen? I dunno, there's a lot. Do you write “Dear Diary” when you write in your diary? I don't have a diary. I don't think I ever did. What is your escape from your problems? Music, playing WoW, stuff like that. Just give me a distraction. Do you watch YouTube videos a lot? Literally every day throughout the day. It's at least background noise. Do you have an embarrassing period story? No, thankfully. Would your life be at risk if someone knew everything about you? No. Is your life at risk? I mean, more than like by disease, some psycho, an accident, shit like that, no? Do you feel safe in your hometown? No. Never did. I miss our house and the childhood memories, but that place was dangerous. Where do you dream of moving to? The mountains of NC. What fascinates you more: outer space or the bottom of the ocean? Space. Have you ever seen a UFO? I guess by the definition of "unidentified flying object," yes, but I think it was some sort of natural phenomenon with a star, not an alien. Maybe. Does anyone encourage you to go after your dreams? Yeah. :') What is the stupidest thing anyone’s ever said to you? "i'Ll AlWaYs LoVe YoU, bRiTtAnY!" What’s the most amount of weight you’ve gained from a medication? LET'S. FUCKING. NOT. Do you name inanimate objects? No. What do you think the constellations mean? "Nothing? Just humanity reaching to ascribe some type of meaningfulness to the world around them." <<<< This, I like this. Did you like the venue your senior prom was held at? I mean it was at the local college's gym. Nothing special. Which spelling do you like best: Hayley, Hailey, or Haley? Hm, I think "Hailey." Which name is better: Hailey, Bailey, Kailey, or Shailey? Ummmmm I think "Kailey." Are you mad at someone? I'm always going to be mad to a degree. Do you feel like your life was stolen from you? I guess in a way by mental illness? Do you have a professional camera? Yeah. What would you change about your hair? Ugh, I want to COLOR it. I really want silver hair atm. When was the last time you changed your hairstyle? Last year. Do you like rose gold? I love it. What’s your favorite color gummy bear? I don't... care? Oh wait, maybe green. Those normally have an apple kinda feel, right? Or do they all thaste the same? What is the sexiest part of the opposite sex’s body? I like s h o u l d e r b l a d e s. Have you ever made up/sang a song for someone you cared about? Only ever poems. Ever had a song sang about/for you? I mean, I've had like songs /dedicated/ to me, but never actually made for me specifically. What is your middle name? Marie. Like every other white girl known to man. What do you smell like? My house, I guess? Ever hurt yourself playing Wii? I don't believe so. Do you have freckles? Not on my face, but random ones on the rest of my body, yeah. Can you do the alphabet in sign language? No. Do you like your feet? I seriously hate feet. That includes mine. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever had in your mouth? uhhhhhhhhh Has anyone ever threatened you with a knife? No. (If you’re a girl) Has anyone ever called you "shorty" instead of "girl"? Ugh no, thank Christ. Have you ever sent an embarrassing moment of yours into a mag to be printed? No. What IS your most embarrassing moment? I've told it before but now I don't remember it??? What’s the last thing to make you scream? Like a small, quick one, I think a loud noise scared me. I've been extremely sensitive to those lately and idk why??? Do your parents knock before coming in, or just barge on in? My door's never really closed, but when it is, Mom doesn't. Dad does. Do you think you’re more cute or sexy? BOY neither. Do you own any mini skirts? Bitch I wish I could wear mini skirts but I would blind people with my body rn. Do you draw little hearts and stuff with eyeliner next to your eyes? Nah. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever lost? Good question, idk. Has your mom ever lied to you? Yeah. Do you have a deep voice? It's definitely deep for a girl, but it's not like, manly. When’s the last time someone made breakfast for you? I guess the last time I was out for breakfast? Idr. When someone knocks on the door, who do you think it is? A mailman/woman. No one else comes here unexpectedly. Has anyone ever licked your foot? UM NO Do you play games with boys/girls, like "hard to get"? I never did and never will. I'm definitely not easy, but I don't play games. Oh wait, unless we're already a serious couple and I'm sexually being a tease. Hobby. When’s the last time someone told you they were in love with you? Some time back. Is there a Sonic where you live? mmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM- Do you smile with your teeth? Usually. What do you like on your pizza? Pepperoni, jalapenos, sausage... stuff like that. I'm WEAK for meat lovers pizza sobs heavily in wanna-be vegetarian Do you know anyone who lives in Newfoundland? No. How ‘bout Alberta? No. Anyone in Canada at all? Yeah, a friend's ex. She's cool. If you could trade houses with a friend, who would it be? I wouldn't damn anyone with this house, lol. I mean it's not bad, it just has its issues. Are you a good person to come to for advice? It depends on the subject we're talkin' here. Do you sleep naked? No. I'd feel so vulnerable. Favorite place you've been: Through the NC mountains. Which of your Facebook friends lives closest to you? UHHHHHHHHH how do I not know this?? When was the last time you cried? Idr, actually. Who took your profile pic? Where? What’s your favorite season? Autumn. What was the last book you read? The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. Fucking read it. Are you a good influence? This also depends on the area of focus. Does pineapple belong on pizza? NO. Sweet and savory do noooot mix in my world.

#survey #quiz #questions #random #bored

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t0ngue-tech · 5 years

Text

All Yours | Six

“’Y/n?”’

‘Hm?’ You answered with a low hum whilst tying your shoelace. There was a crack in Yoongi’s voice when he said your name so it concerned you.

You stood back up on your feet and turned to lock eyes with him. ‘Yeah?’

He opened his mouth to answered, but licked his lips instead. ‘I—nevermind. It’s—I kind of answered my own question in my head.’

There was a nervous chuckle that left his lips and you tried your hardest to not think too much of it.”

↠angsty fluff (lots of dialogue in this one yall) universityAU ↞

word count: 5.8k

↠series: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 7 | ↞

A/N: WHEEEEEEEW POSTING JUST BEFORE THE MONTH ENDS LMAO. this is a late thanksgiving gift huhu. i am so thankful for all of you who appreciate my fics because i know im not the best writer out there, but you guise help build my confidence huhu. this is totes long overdue and i really hope you guise enjoy this chapter. (i apologize if there are any errors, ya girl is exhausted so i might fix it up later lol) i love you guise so much ♡

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Morning.

How were you able to fall asleep perfectly fine until the morning?

When you awoke, Yoongi was sleeping peacefully with the front of his body facing towards the wall. This made it easy for you to roll out of bed without bothering him.

You stirred your coffee and yawned so deeply you felt as if your jaw was going to dislocate. Going to your classes was the last thing you wanted to do. Your body craved sleep and your eyes were still sore from crying last night. But going to class meant avoiding any awkward conversations with Yoongi, so you opted to go.

And yet, this also meant you were going to see Seung Ho, the guy Seolhyun cheated on Yoongi with. This was a class that you couldn’t skip because you desperately needed more attendance points to bump your grade up a little higher.

You tanked entire cup of coffee, ignoring how hot it was, and sighed. Maybe you were overthinking things. Seung Ho didn’t have any business with you so why would he confront you with anything regarding the situation in the first place. But he did know how close you were with Yoongi and if he put two and two together, Seung Ho would know that Yoongi talked to you about it.

It was only 7:30 in the morning and you were already ready to choke yourself with your hair, so you drank whatever was left of your coffee and gathered your clothes to shower.

The shower was able to destress you a bit, but as soon as you stepped out, everything came rushing back. You just needed to survive the day and then you could open up another bottle of wine to have before you go to sleep.

When you entered your room, Yoongi was curled up on his side, facing the door and scrolling through his phone with squinted eyes. He noticed you walk in and instantly sat up.

“Good morning.” He rasped, still half asleep.

“Good morning. Nice hair.” You smiled at the way some of his blond locks stuck out and curled upward.

Yoongi shook his head, running his fingers through his hair. “What time are you leaving?”

You stared at your phone and pondered for a few seconds. “Hm, maybe around 9:15? I need to go over some of my corrections on my literature paper with my professor before I print it out.”

“Did you eat breakfast?”

“I’m about to.” You combed your fingers through your damp hair, shaking it a bit. “Care to join me? Waffles are on the menu.”

↠↞

The atmosphere felt different as you two stood in your small kitchen. Yoongi was preparing himself a cup of coffee while you were waiting for the last pair of chocolate chip waffles to pop out of your toaster. It was comfortable, yet heavy, but normal at the same time.

Yoongi moved naturally inside of your kitchen: going through your fridge to grab the bottle of syrup and even making you a cup of coffee, knowing you probably already had a cup as soon as you got up.

He propped himself on the sofa and carefully placed both of the coffee mugs beside each other. Your attention was so fixated on Yoongi that when the waffles popped out of the toaster, it scared the living hell out of you and made you yelp.

“Goddamnit.” You muttered, quickly pulling out the waffles.

“I don’t think there’s ever going to be a day where you don’t scared of something popping out of the toaster.” Yoongi laughed and sipped on his coffee.

“Is than an insult, Min Yoongi?” You trotted over to the living room with two plates of equally divided waffles on each.

“Yes it was, y/n.” He answered sarcastically and stole one of the plates from your hand.

To your surprise, you both had a lovely breakfast together. Yoongi vividly described the dream he had which dealt with freakishly large goldfish bowls and lagoons of chocolate that surrounded bowls. You jokingly advised him to never indulge in hot pockets before sleeping unless he wants more dreams like that one.

“Yeah, but at least the goldfish weren’t mutants.” Yoongi said entering your kitchen with the dishes.

“Still, nobody wants to see fish that big staring at you.” You commented. Why were you two still discussing his dream? You weren’t even sure yourself. But it was nice to know that you could talk to him as if nothing happened.

You stared at your closet for a few seconds, forgetting that you flipped your work schedule to work tomorrow instead of today—if you knew all of this would’ve happened, maybe you would’ve kept your original schedule.

“Are you staying here?” You asked Yoongi as he flopped back down on your bed.

“I might step out for little. I’m not too sure yet.” Yoongi replied, watching you stuff your pencil cases with a few more pieces of stationery.

“Should I leave you my key or are you going to go back to your dorm?”

“Actually—“ Yoongi took a second to think. “I’ll probably just stay cooped up in here.”

“Whatever sweetens your coffee, Yoongs. Just try not to eat all of my snacks.”

You stood in front of your mirror and ruffled your hair to give it an illusion of voluminous locks and behind you, you could see Yoongi sitting cross legged on your bed. He was picking at his nails, something he usually did whenever he was in deep thought. There were so many things that could be swarming inside of his head at that moment and you decided to not wreck your brain over it.

After staring at yourself in the mirror for what seemed to be ten years, you decided to switch out your coat for a hooded jacket. Since it was pouring last night, you wanted to be prepared just in case there was going to be an unexpected downpour.

You let out a deep sigh and slipped an arm through one of your backpack straps. “I should get going.”

Yoongi hopped off the bed to walk you to your door. It wasn’t necessary but you didn’t protest. He closely followed behind you and gave you room to sit on your floor to put on a pair of shoes.

“Y/n?”

“Hm?” You answered with a low hum whilst tying your shoelace. There was a crack in Yoongi’s voice when he said your name so it concerned you.

You stood back up on your feet and turned to lock eyes with him. “Yeah?”

He opened his mouth to answered, but licked his lips instead. “I—nevermind. It’s—I kind of answered my own question in my head.”

There was a nervous chuckle that left his lips and you tried your hardest to not think too much of it.

“Oh—kay. Then, I’m off.” You smiled at him and walked out, locking the door behind you.

↠↞

Y/n, you need to relax. If Seung Ho even notices that you’re acting a certain way, he’ll probably call you out on it.

It’s only been ten minutes since class started and you already felt your hands sweating. Seung Ho had already greeted you with his usual hey beautiful once he sat down and you ignored him as you always did.

The class was mostly quiet besides the students who asked the professor for help on some math problems. You sat at your computer, clicking away and solving the problems in your notebook in front of you. Once in a while, you would glance at Seung Ho to see if he was as focused you were—focused was a loose term considering how much bricks you were shitting.

What was Yoongi doing at your dorm? What was there to do there? Unlike their dorm, you didn’t have a gaming system and you took your laptop with you because you needed it for your meeting this morning. All Yoongi had was your television, his phone, and your snacks.

God, I hope he doesn’t eat all of my snacks.

You made a mental note to bring dinner for the both of you before heading back home.

50 minutes flew by at the speed of light. Everyone was stuffing their bags with their binders and signing out of the math website while the professor was reminding everyone about the objective due on Sunday. All you needed to do was rush out of the classroom before Seung Ho could say anything else to you; not even his see you next week, babe. You shuddered at the thought. It never really fully bothered you whenever he talked to you like that because he never made any advances towards you at all. But now that you knew what he did with Seolhyun, it disgusted you.

Like a god sent act of mercy, you were able to leave the classroom before Seung Ho did. Unfortunately, the devil works just as fast because you were able to walk about five feet from the doors and when you properly swung your bag over your shoulder, your pencil case flew out as well as a few of your pens.

“Fuck, fuck, fucking mushrooms on my pizza.” The choice of words that tumbled out of your mouth confused yourself and you creased your eyebrows together. You tried to gather your pens with haste and right when you were going to grab the last pen that almost strayed into the grass, Seung Ho stepped in to pick it up for you.

“Hi, y/n.” He handed you the pen and you grasped it in between your shaky fingers.

“Hey..” You breathed.

“I’m going to safely assume that Yoongi told you what happened.”

You almost argued with him by saying something like why the fuck did you get in bed with her in the first damn place but this wasn’t your fight. So you just nodded your head and avoided any eye contact whatsoever.

“Seolhyun wants to talk to him.”

“Yeah well, she can ask him herself.” Ouch, y/n. Too sassy?

Seung Ho adjusted his hat and pulled the sleeves of his flannel down to his wrists. “He isn’t answering any of her calls or text messages.”

“Can you blame him?” The sass spewed out naturally and with everyone walking by, you really didn’t want to have this conversation at that moment. “I need to get to my next class, Seung Ho-”

“Just tell him that Seolhyun wants to talk to him tomorrow. She just wants to have a chance to explain herself. Yoongi deserves an explanation.” You visibly exhaled a deep breath and looked at the time on your phone. “Please, y/n.”

You folded your arms and rolled your eyes. “Fine.” What am I? Their messenger?

Seung Ho gave you a weak smile and put his hands together as a thank you. He brushed passed you and you stood there knowing damn well Yoongi is going to stubborn and not talk to Seolhyun. If you were in his shoes, you wouldn’t want to talk to her either.

But you did kiss him, making Yoongi walk out of your dorm with the look of regret on his face.

You frowned and looked back at your phone. Great, you dragged your mood even further through the mud and you had three minutes to get across campus to your next class.

↠↞

It was a long day—a long school day at least. Lectures seemed a lot longer than usual and the breaks between your classes were supposed to relieve you, but it only made you feel more tired. You needed to pick yourself up a little, so you headed towards the university coffee shop where you found Hani flirting with Seokjin over the bar counter.

“My dumpling!” Hani completely abandoned Seokjin and rushed towards you. “How are you? You didn’t open up my text so I was worried.”

“I’m alright, Hani. Sorry, I’ve just been out of my head since this morning.” You sat down on the empty stool beside hers and Seokjin handed you a vanilla latte.

“I hope you don’t mind, I kind of bribed Hani to tell me some details because I couldn’t wait until your shift tomorrow.”

“Yeah, it’s fine. Can you heat up two paninis? The spinach and the chicken one? Just take the payment out of my paycheck, I’m too lazy to grab my wallet.”

Seokjin did just that, leaving you and Hani to talk.

“So, is Yoongi still at your dorm?”

You nodded your head whilst taking a sip out of your latte. You also texted him during your last class just to make sure he was still there.

“Other stuff happened last night—no, no! Nothing like that!” You laughed at the way Hani’s eyes turned into moons. “I—I really don’t know if I have the right to tell you, but I love you and I trust you.” She nodded her head and anticipated your next few words. “Seolhyun cheated on Yoongi last night.”

Seokjin came back at the perfect time. The dropped the bag of food onto the counter with his mouth agape. Hani mirrored his expression and blinked a few times.

“She cheated-cheated?!” Seokjin exclaimed.

“Yeah,” You sighed. “She was having sex with Seung Ho when Yoongi walked into her room.”

“Yoongi saw what hap—oh my god.” Hani raised her fingers to her lips and remained stunned. You were just as shocked when Yoongi told you, so you understood when they didn’t have much to stay.

“I should get back to my dorm.” You reached over the counter and looped the bag handles through your fingers. “Thanks for these, Seokjin. I’ll update you guys if anything else happens.”

Hani hopped off her seat and opened her arms for you to enter. Her hug was warm and it was something you really needed. You wanted to cry and tell her how stupid you felt for doing what you did last night, but this wasn’t about you. So, you just smiled at the Hani and Seokjin, promising again to update them.

↠↞

The hallway was toasty warm compared to the cold air outside. You were so grateful to finally be back at your dorm where you could throw on pajamas and have your spinach panini—and have casual talk with Yoongi too. Speaking of Yoongi, you didn’t even have a chance to tell him that you bought a small dinner for the both of you.

Oh well, food is food.

You unlocked your door and found both Yoongi and Jungkook sitting in your living room. You first made eye contact with Yoongi and then with Jungkook who had sauce stained on his chin.

“Uh, hi?” You chuckled and slid your shoes off.

“Hey, y/n! Welcome back!” Jungkook lifted his styrofoam bowl up for you to see. “Beef broccoli?”

“Thanks, but I have mines.” You raised the bag that was clutched in between your fingers.

Yoongi beckoned you to join them on the sofa and Jungkook scooted over to make room for you to sit in between them.

“If I knew you were here, I would’ve gotten you a panini too.” You waved the chicken panini in front of Jungkook before passing it on to Yoongi. It seemed like he ate already judging by the second styrofoam bowl that was on your coffee table, but he still took it from you and unwrapped the paper.

“I thought Yoongi told you.” The both of you flickered your attention towards Yoongi who paused mid-bite.

“Sorry.” He mumbled after fully sinking his teeth into the toasted bread. “I literally have no idea where my phone went after I texted Jungkook to come over.”

“He left his phone in our fridge once.” Jungkook mentioned, scarfing down the rest of his food.

“There was one time where he left his phone in between the couch cushions at the lounge. I’m surprised it was there the next morning.” You laughed and Yoongi gave you the are you done yet look.

“Oh! He once—“

“Jungkook, don’t you have a study group to go to?” Yoongi quickly cut him off and flung the panini wrapper square in the face of Jungkook.

Jungkook took a swig from his water bottle and looked down at his phone for the time. Within milliseconds, his eyes grew wide and almost choked on his beverage.

Jungkook pushed himself off your sofa and messily gathered his things. He stuffed whatever trash was lying around into the plastic bag he got with his food.

“I’ll toss these out outside, y/n.” Jungkook shook the plastic bag around his wrist. He waddled over towards your front door where all of the footwear was neatly placed and stepped into his slides. “Bye y/n! See you later, Yoongi!”

He shuffled out of your dorm accidentally slamming your door because of all of the things he was carrying. You heard the muffled sound of Jungkook’s voice saying sorry! behind the door.

“He’s seriously the cutest. I understand why you love him so much.” You chuckled and scooted over to sit where Jungkook was sitting.

“Ehh, I don’t love him that much.”

You laughed at the look Yoongi gave you because you could already tell he was lying.

The room fell silent and you weren’t sure if it was the perfect time to mention Seolhyun’s name. There was no mention of her name whatsoever since this last night, so bringing her up too out of the blue didn’t seem right. Within the silence, Yoongi looked as if an idea had struck him and he fished in between the couch cushions and like magic, his phone was uncovered.

“Well, shit.” He breathed and you snorted with laughter.

“You didn’t even feel any sort of vibration or hear your text message tone at all?” You were at the brink of tears at this point and abdominal muscles were already forming over your stomach.

“No, I—” Yoongi continuously clicked on the home button as well as the lock button. “I guess my phone died?”

The confused look on his face made you laugh even more.

Defeated by your amusement to his confusion, he shook his head and retreated into your room to grab a phone charger.

“Now that I think about it, I did invite Jungkook over around two and I think my phone percentage was around fifteen percent?” Jungkook sat on the floor so he could keep his phone close as he charged it.

“And for four hours, you lost your phone?” You got comfortable and stretched your legs out onto your sofa.

“Yeah and what took you so long anyway? I thought your last class finished at three today.”

“My lab partner and I wanted to perfect our hypothesis and experiment—actually, I texted you this.” You chucked in disbelief and showcased your conversation with Yoongi.

[12:46] You: i might fall asleep in this library

[1:03] Yoongz: I already took two naps. One on your bed and another on your sofa

[1:35] You: i’m going to die in my criminology class

[3:22] You: hey, i’m staying back to fix up my lab. idk when i’m going to be back but don’t eat all of my food pls

Yoongi stared blankly at your phone and once his phone booted up, it vibrated on your floor like crazy. The sound startled you and you sat up to take a quick look at his phone.

There were a few twitter and email notifications, but the thing that stood out the most was Seolhyun’s name on his phone that he already changed to her first and last name. Yoongi remained quiet as he stared at the multiple text messages he received from Seolhyun. There were repeated messages of please call me back and talk to me. Yoongi shifted his body and you quickly looked away from his phone.

“Are you?” You cleared your throat. “Gonna call her back, that is.”

He didn’t turn to face you, instead, he took a deep breath mumbled, “I don’t know.”

On an impulse, your fingers reached up to gently graze a few strands of Yoongi’s hair. You continued to move up and massage his scalp with your fingertips. “Don’t you want to hear an explanation?”

“And listen to her rant about how I’ve been such a bad boyfriend to the point where she had to cheat on me?” There was clear anger in Yoongi’s words and you couldn’t blame him.

“Yoongi-”

“I don’t want to hear anything that she has to say, y/n.” Yoongi twisted his body around and with the lightest grip you had on the back of head, your hand was now resting on his cheek when he turned.

Your eyes felt like they were stinging with tears and you didn’t even know why you felt like crying. Maybe because it was the pain that Yoongi held in his eyes and see how fast he was breathing. Yoongi didn’t deserve this, and Seung Ho was right, he deserved an explanation.

“Seung Ho talked to me after class—Yoongi please just—just listen,” Yoongi rolled his eyes and you cupped his face with both hands. “I know you’re assuming that you’re going to hear her mention about you being a bad boyfriend and hey, maybe you won’t. But Seung Ho even said that you deserve and explanation and frankly, I agree.”

Yoongi focused his attention to somewhere else on the floor and you squished his cheeks and made him look at you. “This is closure. I know you’re done, but you should also get everything you want off your chest too because she needs to know how much you tried and how much it hurt to be the only one trying.”

The stern look in his eyes grew softer and it seemed like he was finally listening to you. Yoongi rested one of his hands on your knee and drummed his fingers against the fabric of your jeans.

“Fine.” He sighed and you softly smiled at him. “But only on one condition—you have to come with me.”

Your jaw dropped a little and your pace of your blinking grew rapid. “I—I don’t think that’s a good idea, Yoongi. Especially since, for some reason, you told her that you kissed me.”

“She’s not going to do anything to you. I won’t let her.” Yoongi’s voice sounded certain. “I just don’t want to be left alone with her.”

He grazed your knee and you tried not to flinch. You really didn’t want to be around Seolhyun, especially because she knows that the two of you kissed. But if it was the price to pay to let Yoongi have his closure, then so be it.

“O-Okay..” You said quietly. “I’ll go.”

“Thank you.” Yoongi’s voice was just as quiet as yours and his lips twitched upward into a small smile.

Honestly, if Yoongi continued to look at you the way he was at the moment, you would lose all restraint and kiss him again. Yoongi’s eyes held every star in the universe and you didn’t understand what made Seolhyun want to cheat on someone like him.

The sound of your text message tone made you two break eye contact; you were disappointed yet relieved.

“Everything okay?” Yoongi asked whilst standing up.

“Yeah, Jungkook just asked me if you found your phone yet.” You chuckled a little and tapped away at your keyboard.

“I guess I should text him.” Yoongi bent down to retrieve his phone. “By the way, sorry if I invited him over like it was my own place. I just asked him to bring me my bag with some clothes and my charger.”

“It’s no problem.” You answered. “You’re not heading back to your dorm?”

Yoongi set his phone back down and stuck his hands into his pockets. “U-Uh, no. Not tonight, if that’s okay with you?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.” You breathed. “I”m uh, I’m gonna take a shower. I probably smell like chemicals.”

↠↞

That hot shower hit the spot. Even if the shower was the perfect place to stand in deep thought, you didn’t want to think about anything that had to deal with Seolhyun or Yoongi staying over again. You did promise yourself to not lose anymore self control because now was not the time to think about kissing him again or even cuddling with him. You caught yourself blushing as you dried your hair.

“Get yourself together, y/n. Keep your shit together.” You huffed quietly and unplugged your hair dryer.

When you walked into your room, Yoongi was changed into a gray tracksuit and was sitting cross legged on your bed. You spotted his backpack sitting on your desk chair which reminded you that your bag was still in your living room.

“You’re going to sleep already?” Yoongi called out.

“No, I have to make a few revisions on my paper.” You returned shortly, basically dragging your bag on the floor.

“Oh. Uh, well, if you’re done early, do you want to watch something on Netflix?” He averted his eyes away from you and found the loose thread on your blanket more interesting.

You chuckled at his shyness and took a seat across from him with your laptop tucked underneath your arm. “Sure.”

While you clacked away at your keyboard, Yoongi was absorbed in a game on his phone. He plugged his charger into the usb port on the side of your laptop, so he was lying down with his body at a 90 degree angle against your wall. It felt like nothing ever happened between you two because his presence was comforting.

After a few more strokes on your keyboard, you cracked your knuckles in front of you and sighed. “Done?” Yoongi asked whilst sitting up.

“Yeah, for the most part. I just hope this is the last revision I need to do.” You set your already heated laptop on your desk to properly cool. About 40 minutes had passed since you started revising and your back felt like it needed to be snapped in half like a glow stick.

“Let’s watch Coraline. It’s been a while.” Yoongi suggested and you didn’t complain, it was your favorite movie.

He took the liberty to take your laptop and set it up near the footside of your bed. You shared Yoongi’s Netflix account along with Jungkook, Jin, and Seolhyun; he was probably going to change his password soon.

The “continue watching” section was an array of genres ranging from anime to serial killer documentaries to food related videos. But Coraline always remained somewhere on that list. Yoongi didn’t know you rewatched the movie last week, but you didn’t mind watching it again and you especially didn’t mind watching it with him.

You were in the kitchen pouring some chips into a bowl and grabbing two water bottles out of your refrigerator when you heard the start up music of Coraline.

“I was so close to getting a yellow raincoat because of this movie.” You tossed a water bottle to Yoongi who already made himself comfortable against your head board.

“What stopped you?”

“My will power.” You snorted at the contradiction of your words and placed your head pillow onto your lap to sit next to him.

It was now farther into the movie, the chips were completely finished after two refills and the empty bottles were sitting on your desk. You were still sitting up with your legs stretched out to avoid your feet falling asleep. On the other hand, Yoongi’s entire body was already stretched out onto the mattress with his head sunk deep into the pillow.

“You know the first time I saw this movie, I really wasn’t expecting it to be this creepy.” You chuckled at the memory of you being a bit more terrified than your liking; it literally gave you a few sleepless nights after the first time watching it.

You waited for Yoongi to tease you or make some sort of sarcastic remark and it struck you as odd when you didn’t hear anything coming from him.

“I swear if you’re—” You turned your head to him. “Asleep.”

Yoongi had his head tilted towards your body and his hands were resting flat on top of his stomach. It almost felt like a crime to wake him up because he looked peaceful whilst sleeping, so opted to move as quiet and nimble as possible. You started to reach forward to pause the movie and with the subtle movement you made on the bed was enough to awake him.

“Finished already?” He tried to play it off and stretched his arms up and placed them behind his head.

“You’re not slick, Min Yoongi.” You scoffed and continued to clean up the mess around you two. “You literally took two naps today and you still managed to sleep while watching Coraline.”

“Are you surprised?” He shuffled his body to curl up on his left side to watch you clean up.

That answer was coming from the same boy who slept for almost a full day, had dinner, and then fell back asleep after letting himself digest for about an hour. All in all, I guess you weren’t as surprised as you thought.

Without exchanging anymore words, you put everything away into its respectful places and turned off your light with only the dim light from outside peeking through your curtains. Yoongi was still lying on his side with one hand tucked in between his knees and the other underneath his cheek. While your eyes adjusted to the dimness of the room, you could still see the whites of Yoongi’s eyes. You continuously told yourself to stay cool and to not show any signs of anxiety about lying down next to him. Everything between the two of you remained the same since this morning so just because you were going to sleep beside him doesn’t mean that it was time for the energy to change.

“Y/n?” Yoongi’s voice cut through your thoughts.

“Hm?” You hummed and sat down on your space of the bed.

“Can I—Can I ask you something?” As Yoongi stated the question, he sat up himself to sit cross legged towards you.

Your heart thumped against your chest cavity at the way he said can i ask you something? “Sure.”

The sigh he pushed out was audible and scooted closer to you. His eyes were darted elsewhere and the silence was weighing heavy around you.

“Can…” He started. “Can I have another kiss?”

Yoongi’s question knocked the wind out of your lungs and made your heart stop beating for a second. In what world would Yoongi be asking for a kiss because this had to be a dream. What made things worse was that you were actually giving it some thought and you were just telling yourself to get your shit together.

Now was not the time to be thinking about how soft his lips were or how lovely the dainty features on his face looked like. You especially didn’t want to think about how much you really wanted to kiss him.

Let’s be real; kissing him was a stupid and painful decision that you made on your own, but was it a crime to want to kiss him again? It had to be.

“Why..?” Your question came out as a tiny squeak and you were hoping you didn’t sound offensive or bothered by the idea.

“I just..” Yoongi rubbed the back of his neck. “I like the way your lips feel.”

You wanted to laugh at the way he started, but he spoke without a mere chuckle so everything else that followed deemed serious.

“I also thought about why you would’ve kissed me and I think I figured it out.” You swallowed the lump in your throat. “There’s also a lot I want to talk to you about. It’s stuff that’s been bothering me, but we can talk about all of that another time.” He sighed and made heavy eye contact with you. “I just really want to kiss you.”

This had to all be a dream; you would’ve slapped yourself to check, but now was not the time.

It didn’t feel right to kiss him. It didn’t feel right to want to hold his hand as you laid down next to him because he just went through an ordeal. Yoongi needed to rest, even if he had a good amount of rest today. He needed time to gather himself especially since he agreed to meet with Seolhyun to have closure. All you had to do was politely tell him that now was not the right time for this. But as sane as you were most of the time, you were selfish about some things sometimes.

And now was one of those times.

“O-Okay..” You breathed.

Even in your dimmed room, you saw Yoongi’s eyes light up at your answer and it almost made your lips twitch into a smile.

“I can kiss you?” He asked again.

“Yeah.” You reassured. “You can.”

Compared to yesterday, the entire world around you started to slow down. Yoongi shifted his weight onto one hand to keep him at bay while he reached up to run his fingers against your cheek before cupping it.

Your breath hitched in your throat as Yoongi crept in to close the gap in between you two. At first you were hesitant in closing your eyes, but just before Yoongi fully reached the flesh of your lips, his flickered to yours. The gaze he gave you was calming and instead of it helping you relax, it only made your more nervous. You could practically hear the sound of your heartbeat ringing through your eyes; probably loud enough for Yoongi to hear.

It felt like hours before you watched Yoongi’s eyelids flutter close and yours followed in suit.

The initial touch of his lips sent a jolt of electricity throughout your body and as his lips molded carefully into yours, you sighed into the kiss. You could almost feel your body grow numb, but was revived back to life as Yoongi’s lips moved shyly against your own.

Your hands were balled into fists on your lap until you gained feeling back in your hands. You blindly reached for his hand and once you found it, he eagerly accepted the invitation to interlock fingers with you.

After what seemed to be forever, the bliss of kissing Yoongi came to an end once he pulled back an inch away from your face. You opened your eyes to find him staring back at you and he chuckled. The sound was music to your ears because along with the short sound of his laughter, he smiled. He still had his hand resting on your cheek and before you could say anything or even exchange your own laughter, he gently tugged at your face to plant another kiss on your lips.

Excitement bubbled inside of your chest all over again and you couldn’t even stop yourself from cracking a smile as you kissed. You liked Yoongi for so long and so damn much that feeling this happy had to be a crime of some sort. And if it was, you were more than ready to accept whatever sentence was given.

♡ rae

#bangtan boys #bts #bts fics #suga fics #suga scenarios #suga angst #suga fluff #bts angst #bts fluff #hello everyone #how u doin #finally updating all yours lol #took me about ten years #eNJOOOOY #yoongz #rae writes

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heykageyama-archive · 6 years

Text

Hurt

Pairing: Hotch x Reader x Rossi

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Request: Requested by anonymous This may be unusual but could you do a Hotch x reader x Rossi with the guys taking care of the reader after they have been injured. Like Hotch is full of hugs away from the team and Rossi too full of hugs, massages, making food etc

Word Count: 1,628 (not sorry lol)

A/N: I am so so sorry anon but this is long overdue. I’m trying to catch up with my requests from now on and after I do, requests will be open again ! I hope you enjoy and feedback is always appreciated.

Warning(s): Mentions of blood, a lot of angst, just a tad bit of fluff

(gifs are not mine)

This particular case had been a pain. Especially when you and the team had finally cracked it after so many twists and dead ends. You all had just figured out the location of the unsub and you all rushed to leave. You wanted to catch this son of a bitch for putting women through the worst pain possible. While en route, you and the team had discussed what way would be best to catch him in. You all decided that the best way to catch him would be to catch him off guard and eventually get the latest victim out of there and alive. The screeching of tires made the SUV come to a halt as you all moved out of the vehicle and put on your vests. You gazed at the huge building in front of you, worrying that you may not be able to find the girl inside in time. You sighed as you folded the last strap onto the vest. Hotch turned around and spoke to all of you. He put you all in pairs along with the SWAT team before going inside. You and Rossi moved inside and immediately went right while the others went in different directions. He suggested that you both split up to cover more ground and you agreed. Rossi gestured the SWAT team member to follow him in another direction while you kept moving straight.

You turned at a corner and saw that it was yet another empty hallway. You sighed in frustration but slowly kept moving. You peered at the dark bloody walls beside you and grimaced. You couldn’t have imagined what had happened here and you didn’t want to know either. You re-tightened your grip on your gun as you continued down the hallway. Suddenly something grabbed hold of your shoulders and slammed you against the wall. Then your face was slung to the side as someone punched you. It took you a second to process what just happened but you grabbed the unsub by the collar and slammed your face into his, making him curse. He stumbled backwards and you took the opportunity to kick him in the stomach but he quickly dodged it. The unsub retaliated by kicking you in the leg, making you drop to one knee. You groaned in pain while he punched you again only this time you fell to the ground. He turned you over on your back and straddled you around your waist. One hit after another, the pain was excruciating. You tried to reach for your gun in your holster, but then the unsub had pulled out a knife. You felt a sting in your left arm then he stabbed again. You screamed out in pain as the unsub began to leave. You heard voices in the distance and you hoped it was your colleagues. Your vision was blurry because your face had swollen up and covered in blood. You weakly pulled out your gun and aimed at the unsub. You fired the shot and the bullet ended up going into his leg. The unsub fell to the ground as you heard a rampage of footsteps. Your breathing slowed as you struggled to even keep your eyes open. You saw a couple of SWAT members go arrest the unsub, then you looked up and saw Hotch and Rossi above you. Their voices echoed throughout you ears as they tried talked to you. You felt Rossi put pressure on your arm before everything faded into darkness.

“We need a medic!” Hotch yelled into the earpiece. Rossi saw that your eyes were closed and he lightly pat your face, carefully trying not hurt you more than it already does. You barely opened your eyes when he spoke.

“Hey kid, I need you to keep your eyes open and focused on me okay?” When you tried to reply, he shushed you. “Save your breath and your energy.”

By that time, the rest of the team was waiting outside for the medics to bring you out on the gurney. The ambulance’s blue and red lights flashed across the ground while everyone wore worried expressions. The medics rushed past them to get you into the ambulance. Rossi decided to ride with them to the hospital and notify them until the arrive. His hands were covered in blood and he was breathing heavily. The medics had brought over an oxygen mask to hopefully help you breathe. Rossi was nervously sat watching you, praying that you would be okay.

“B/P is sixty over palp, resp is ten-” One of the medics started to say but the beeping of the monitor got everyone’s attention. Flat-line. Everyone stared in shock but then instantly got back to work. Tears started to form in his eyes, Rossi has seen many friends and agents of his pass in his line of work. You couldn’t die. Especially you were one of the younger agents, you had a full life ahead of you. If only he hadn’t mentioned splitting up. This was all his fault.

When the ambulance arrived at the hospital, everyone raced to get you inside. One of the medics had managed to climb on top of you and started CPR. When they reached the hallway towards the emergency room, they finally got you breathing again. They explained to the doctor what your stats and condition was. The doctor shined a light into your eyes.

“Her pupils are reactive, we need to get her into surgery immediately.”

Rossi stood at the door of the emergency room, him biting his lip to prevent the tears from crashing down. Rossi was always like a father figure to you and you appreciated it. Growing up with your father dying at a early age was difficult. Rossi went to go sit in the waiting room while he waited for the rest of the team to arrive. He held his head in his hands, lost in thought about what just happened in the last two hours. He wondered what would’ve happened if you hadn’t split up. Would he be in your position or would have you both successfully captured the unsub? He thought of what he could’ve done differently. The team appeared behind him and instantly bombarded him with worriedly questions. He gestured for them to calm down.

“She went into surgery about fifteen minutes ago. I don’t know anything yet but when I do, you all will be the first to know.”

Hotch noticed the tears threatening to fall and suggested that they speak in private. He agreed and moved away from the tea as they sat down in different chairs around the waiting room. Hotch waited for Rossi to speak while he took a moment to regroup.

“Aaron, it’s really bad. When-when we were in the ambulance, she stopped breathing. I mean they have her breathing now but, I thought we lost her. If she doesn’t make it out of surgery alive, I’ll never forgive myself. This is all my fault. If I had not-”

“Dave, all we can do is hope and pray that Y/N will be alright. This is not your fault, you couldn’t have known.”

Hotch gave Rossi a reassuring pat on the shoulder before Rossi left to go sit down. Hotch glanced to the side and stared at the emergency room door for a moment. He gulped while he sighed. He hoped he was right.

Hours and hours passed by while you all waited for the surgery to be finished. People from the waiting room had came and went. It was beginning to be around three am when the doctor finally came out and announced your name. Everyone turned their sleepy gazes towards the doctor as Hotch stood to his feet. He took a deep breath and hoped for the best before walking over.

“The wounds that were penetrated by the knife were very deep and she lost a ton of blood along with the injuries to her face. We gave her some stitches but she stable right now. You can see her now and she’ll be able to go home when you all are ready to leave.”

Hotch smiled and thanked the doctor as she began to leave. Everybody looked up when Hotch walked back over. They all saw his relieved expression and smiled to each other. Each team member entered your room but frowned when they saw you. You had bruises all over your face with a couple of stitches. You arm had a huge bandage around it. You hadn’t woken up yet as they slowly walked over to you. They surrounded your bed as you heard little whispers around you. You opened your eyes to see your team around you but then felt a sharp sting in your face and arm. You winced and positioned yourself so you were sitting up. They looked at you with such happiness as they greeted you. Each of your colleagues took turns hugging you and saying that they were happy to see you alright. Rossi and Hotch were the last two and asked everyone if they could give them a minute. They pulled up two chairs on each side of you as you watched the door close.

“How are you feeling?” Rossi asked as he held your hand.

“Like hell.” You replied, earning a chuckle from both of the men.

“Listen, I thought I lost you back there. All because of my actions. I want to redeem myself by taking care of you until you are ready to get back to work. Aaron will make daily checkups to see how you’re doing. I won’t take no for an answer.”

You sighed at the both of them. “Thank you guys. I really appreciate it.”

“You ready to get out of here?”

“Hell yeah.”

Taglist: @criminal-navy-writings @criminallmiinds @teatimewithtiya @theofficeofsupremegenius @badasprentiss @jazz91121 @spencerthepipecleaner @spencer-puppies-and-stuff @fl0werb0nes18 @semitallmuffin @ireadtoavoidmyproblems @derekmorgansoffice @veroinnumera @latte-to-go @dearspencerreid @ilikeitwhenyousleepforyouareso

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canaryatlaw · 7 years

Text

Well, today was fine, whereas I'd rate the last two days as moderately sucky, so fine is an improvement at least. My normal 9 am church alarm went off and I'm lazy AF and didn't want to get out of bed but I still have to go for the nursery, so I reset my alarm for 10:30 and went back to sleep, then rewoke up at 10:30 and got ready. The bus was running late so I ended up getting there a few minutes late, which isn't a big deal of course but being late is like the biggest pet peeve of my life (blame theatre) so of course I was annoyed. The nursery ended up being very chill though, we only really had one baby for most of the time. When I first got in there the lady I was talking about last week who had a baby not that long ago was hanging out and breastfeeding her daughter before the left, so I got to see her adorable daughter for a little before they left and omg she's sooo cute I can't even handle this little cutie pie. So adorable. Then when I first got in there was a boy who's been in there before but hasn't been doing well lately, so we tried to keep him entertained while his mom waited outside to see what happened and after like ten minutes it became obvious he was not going to calm down so we got his mom and the two of them were kind of in and out, but they came and played with us for some of the time. The little girl we had for most of it was a cute little thing, 9 months old and crawling but forever looking like she's trying to push unto her feet to stand but not quite having the strength to do so (you'll probably have to take my word for it, but it was cute) and she was quite amicable for most of the time, almost no crying so that's always good. She apparently had a very bad diaper rash and her mom had requested we text her if she needed to have her diaper changed so she could do it, and when there were like 15 minutes left in the service we realized she was wet so her mom came up and changed her (the poor little girl cried like the entire time, it was so sad) and the mom of the little boy who was in there recommended a good diaper rash cream for her to use so hopefully that was helpful at least (my life is thrilling, I know). They left after that though and we were good to go, so I headed out once service got out and headed home. Stopped at Walgreens quickly for Claritin d, then got home and ran to do some laundry since I never quite finished it from last weekend, but then realized I didn't have enough quarters to put 2 loads all the way through (each machine is $2 a pop so to put 2 loads through washer and dryer you need $8 in quarters which can be a somewhat deceiving amount to picture) so I sadly only got to do one load, then added them to the clothing I didn't fold from last week because if you haven't noticed by now, I'm lazy AF. Lol. The DV clinic is closed for lincoln's birthday tomorrow though so I can at least be productive and handle that at some point. After that I worked on my trial ad stuff. We're starting impeachments this week, which will hopefully be better than exhibits, and prepping for them wasn't too bad. The one I'm a witness for this week (only like half the people get assigned a witness each week but I always end up getting one because everyone knows I make the best witness) is a pretty basic car crash personal injury case, but I'm thinking about doing a really bratty teenager character for it, haha that's what hit me right off the bat so we'll see where it goes with that. I made some dinner, like actual food for the week, my general chicken pasta with creamy Parmesan sauce thing that's super easy and delicious (which was super easy and delicious) then spent way too much time downloading a free trial of Photoshop and trying to photoshop a rooster into Katrina Law's arms because she wanted someone on Twitter to do so and I felt like taking upon the task even though I've literally never used photoshop before nor had any idea how to use it but hey, how hard could it be? Harder than originally thought, lol, and it basically just looked like a rooster superimposed in front of a picture of Katrina Law (because that's what it was, I'll post it after this) but she apparently found it hilarious so that was cool, and now I have 6 more days of a photoshop free trial to do something with (there's at least a 95% chance I'll end up never touching it again). After that I did the company tumblr and other such things while watching crazy ex-girlfriend, which I have to say, holy shit I love this show??? It's just so damn quotable and the writers like, understand me haha I'm really enjoying it, even if their court scenes were very inaccurate (I'm now totally incapable of watching a tv court scene without picking apart every inaccuracy, it's bad I know). So that made for an enjoyable night. I'm trying to figure out if I can actually feel relaxed when I've had a fair amount of time to relax over the past 3 days, and I still feel like I'm not sure? Just idk, I'm not sure I've been able to get my brain to stop racing, even when I'm just relaxing there's always something I have to get done, even if it's just reading through the tumblrs I check every day or reading the 4 articles brought up on my browser (I wind up reading a lot of articles, people tend to like when I post them on Facebook so I do so with some frequency). And like, it's so fucking annoying. I've also kind of been thinking that you know I don't have to be this busy if I don't want to...? Just like thinking that the DV clinic is cancelled this week- like I have this idea in my head that everyone (or at least every law student) has basically the same schedule and amount of responsibilities, and as long as I make them all fit together it's fine right? That's how it's supposed to be? But....it's not. I don't have to do the DV clinic. I don't have to go to the gym, didn't have to sign back up at the kickboxing gym, didn't have to sign up for small groups- they were all just things I had the opportunity to do and I WANTED to do them. And I just don't know if that's a good enough reason at this point? I mean, I know I'll have more time once mock trial is over and that'll be in like two weeks, but just right now even when I have some time to decompress it always feels like I'm rushing from one thing to the next and like, it sucks. Ugh. It's entered my head a few times that I should talk to my psychiatrist about this, and I'm really overdue for a phone appointment with him that I should get on. I've briefly considered the idea that maybe being in therapy would help but I don't really think it's that kind of issue, plus I really don't want to?? Idk, watching that poor girl fight the judge about going to therapy last week just kind of got me thinking about it and I understand how she feels but I'm also supposed to be the mental health advocate that's telling people it's okay to go to therapy and they shouldn't be scared, and that's what I wanted to tell her, but I feel it too, I really do. But I just don't know. I feel like it's just my schedule and not a mental thing (or at least that's what I want it to be). Sigh. I don't know. I hope it goes away before I have to do anything else about it. I guess we'll see what happens. Tomorrow should be interesting. First at 11 I have my skype interview with the org I want to work with over the summer, so I'm pumped about that. Then I have to get the non-Valentine's Day Valentine's Day cards to the place and go to class, through some combination of public transit and ubers. I may try to fit some gym time in there, it'll depend on how my timeline works out, I'm not making any definitive plans yet. But it should be a good day. And now it's 2 am And I should get to bed because I do have to get up and make myself look pretty and put a suit on to stare into my laptop because skype interviews are a thing, even if I maybe can go back to sleep afterwards (we'll see how tired I'm feeling). And yeah. Should be good. But until then. Goodnight lovelies. Have a wonderful week.

#daily journal #February 2017

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