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mahou-furbies · 1 year

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Mahou wrap up 2022 survey results

Here are the results of the recent questionnaire for your Mahou 2022!

Best character:

irma w.i.t.c.h.

Myamu

Lemon Kokoa

sunday spade wild cardz

Luchia Nanami

Mew Lettuce

Cure Whip! (i rewatched KiraKira! So not really 2022? If from 2022 only, I loved Kuroe)

Cure Precious/Yui Nagomi

nanami kiryuu

Fuwa Kokone

Sayaka miki (I watched side story this year so it technically counts even though she’s my favorite magical girl ever)

Yui Nagomi/Cure Precious, Ichigo Momomiya/Mew Ichigo

Best character design:

Cure YumYum

Cure Yum Yum

Cure coral

cure flora

Cure Finale

Kome-Kome

The Hirogaru Sky silhouettes. I just know the full designs are gonna be ballin'

This is a hard one, all of the Primagi designs are tied.

kumi kumi from mgrp white is minecraft

Infinite Iroha (Magia Record)

I just love seeing designs in general

the way utena uses the transformations for symbolism and what not is super cool design by itself goes to cure summer shes great

Mew Lettuce's and Mew Zakuro's 2022 designs

Best work:

Tokyo Mew Mew New

Tokyo Mew Mew New!

care bear stars

Magilumiere

Healer Girl

....does witch hat atelier count as a mg since it's witches or it it too fantasy world to be one? either way it slaps

Ultra Maniac

Delicious Party PreCure has its moments but it's not my fav season or anything. I wish I had time for more anime this year, but unfortunately I've been working overtime.

Can I say Glitter and Guilt? Because there's published webcomic pages now

utena is the best show ive watched in a long time i love picking it apart and even tough its super dark and hard to watch the visuals and everything is amazing i love the movie the most its so surreal and dreamy this is all entirely expected bc i love twin peaks and theyre a very similar niche

I really really liked Madoka side story, but I watched yuki yuna and was really pleasantly surprised by it!

Free comment field for gushing about something that didn’t fit the other topics:

uhh watch lego monkie kid its like a magical girl show but about a boy

Keeping it to series i more or less saw this 2022 but i really wanna praise waccha primagi tho its more of an idol series than magical girl the magic is every present in the show and i love the great myamu sama the ending moved me to tears.

saint tail remaster bless discotek

Obsessed with the Shugo Chara Wonderland merch that released earlier this year.

Was fascinated how some of the dress up collection dresses made a comeback in the DeliPre series. For example when Kokone was shown wearing Rikka's blue gown.

Watching Vampire in the Garden (a non mahou show) has given me ideas for making a magical girl OC with clothes based on Imperial Russia. You can never have too many OCs!

all the merch and new content for the early-mid 2000's shows and manga has got me really excited! like, of course we got the Tokyo Mew Mew reboot, but there's been new merch and art for Shugo Chara, Mermaid Melody has that sequal series being released, and even Saint Tail has gotten some stuff. It makes me hopeful that other manga besides Mew Mew will also get the same love and attention!

power of friendship is the shit and somehow mg shows make it not cheesy but good good

The Mascots and Recipepes in Delicious Party Precure are so cute!! I also liked the addition of Rosemary and BlackPepper/Takumi.

Hmmm I really liked some magical girl webcomics I was reading, like Cloudy Wondrous and Captian Jellyfish

I love Takumi from DeliPaPre, he's such a dork and its very endearing how he tries to be a cool Tuxedo Mask type but sometimes forgets his Cool Guy persona bc "omg its yui" lol

Complaint time!

Gushing Over Magical Girls should be good. i like the designs but too horny for the age of everyone

Mew Mint's henshin was a major downgrade from the original

The adaptation of Magia Record was such a disappointment! It undid the happy ending of the game and killed of several characters for shock value!

I finally got around to watching all of Day Break Illusion and GOD it started out really cool and interesting, but than it decided to just get BAD bad a bit after the half way mark. Lots of missed potential.

WHY CAN'T WE GET ANY MAHOU MOBILE GAMES IN ENGLISH EVERY TIME I SEE GAME CHARACTERS ON MGOTD I WANT THEM BUT THEY'RE ALWAYS DISCONTINUED OR SOMETHING Also Miraculous Ladybug is a trainwreck

i watched a lot of older and darker mg shows this year and i really dont like the saturation of designs that exist now also there arent newer medium dark shows that ive heard its either for kids or everyone dies i like both but not as the only option

How easily I fall out of a Precure season. Delicious Party I think is the furthest I've ever gotten

yuis lack of a personality in delipre

The 4th cures design and general costume of delipre didnt really live up to the food theme.

Honestly I really hate how delicious party precure is pushing stress eating as a good thing.

Delicious Party Precure seemed to have TOO many themes at the same time and didn't feel as cohesive as other teams to me.

Hmm I tried watching some of the later entries in precure (tropical rouge and delipre) and I simply couldn’t get into any of them :/ I also tried watching flip flappers again and simply couldn’t get through it again -_- it was uncomfortable to watch

Mahou plans and hopes for 2023:

That the new precure series will be aesthetic af

I'm always excited for the next Precure!

im hoping this years precure has an angel theme and there will be more cyber inspired designs in general i find them fun and good for diversity also ive started the sailor moon anime i read the manga when i was a little kid but ive never watched it

To like the new season of precure and for Magilumere to keep going

Super excited for Hirogaru Sky!! And Mew New season 2

I hope the new precure season uses the duo formula again, and a more pastel color palette. Also looking forward to the new Sailor Moon movie!

I hope the next precure season is better than DeliParty, and I also hope for a Primagi season 2! Just more new original stories would be nice.

lesbians

new original series.

I'm really looking forward to Mahou Shoujo Magical Foghters and In/Spectre season 2!! Gonna watch those weekly!

Learn to take things off the backburner

God I wish I could design magical girls

Hopefully I’ll be able to get my current project going (webcomic)

More magical girl stuff in general, and less fighting among fans over ships and the grimdark vs. standard genres

Thanks to everyone who took part!

Raffle winners have been contacted. I’ll wait... let’s say a week in case people are busy doing something else over the holidays than browsing tumblr, and if there’s no response I’ll pick a different winner.

#blog stuff

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roobylavender · 10 months

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ive been scouring through your old specifically batman related posts and you mentioned how you were reading batgirl 2000 but havent finished it and i would genuinely love to know your thoughts because personally i feel like it genuinely establishes cass as such an interesting character and i think you would find her fascinating . however i find myself disliking bruce more often than not like i feel like nearly everything he teaches her is unhealthy lol like yes cass you should throw your life away for others and dedicate yourself solely to the mission. he definitely has a fondness for her but i dont know. and i feel like that one issue, #50 or around that, i just dont know how to feel with bruce wanting to physically fight her and i feel crazy for taking a bit of an issue with that considering everyone glosses over it? like yes the end of that is about has cass accepting his love which is nice and him giving it to her in a way she understands but i think some things he does are a bit. idk idk

[in tears] i think it was more than a year ago i picked up the preliminary dc issues part of no man's land to start reading about her and then for some reason i never continued like i think i got busy.. i really need to like sit down properly sometime this summer if i can and start from knightfall and proceed onward so i can get in the right headspace for re-evaluating bruce's progression again. bc i am definitely interested in what i have heard of bruce's more unorthodox parenting methods in batgirl and much as i am loath to portrayals of bruce as an outright hostile parent i am not entirely opposed to him embodying a parenting style that is simply.. very weird and maybe questionable as an extension of how crazy the phenomena of the robins and batgirls is in the first place. like yes it's a reflection of his deep empathy and compassion that he adopts dick and jason and then allows them to use robin as a conduit through which to channel their angers and fears so they don't turn out as emotionally isolated or obsessive as he thinks he did but it's also obv not really a normal thing to do! and you could def argue it's something that sets bruce's relationships with his sidekicks apart from that of his peers and their sidekicks (although i suppose some people might want to compare with arthur/garth or ollie/roy, but my answer to that would be that at least from what little of aquaman canon i have read i don't think arthur had any particular motive in taking on garth as a sidekick beyond it simply being convenient after the adoption; and with ollie i think that's even more true bc it's the lack of motive that leads to his temporary rift with roy bc ollie hasn't put quite enough thought into what he wants roy to be and that is something that hurts roy in turn). no normal parent is going to tell their kid to fight them in order to ascertain if they're truly committed to the cause. but a bruce who has by now had experiences with a handful of children whom he believes he imposed a duty onto rather than allowing them to come to the conclusion of wanting to uphold that duty themselves, may very well think asking his adopted daughter to fight him to prove her intent is logical and a means of ensuring he is not making the same mistakes all over again. doesn't make it any less crazy a thing to do! but it's certainly bruce to the core. interestingly i am curious if that is something barbara calls him out on bc if anyone were to do it i feel like she would. i like that she's the person who gets to poke at him for being a bit of a paranoid weirdo

#outbox

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ofcowardiceandkings · 3 years

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I think you mentioned listening to podcasts? Do you have any favorites to reccommend? I've run out of content :(

that i do !

im not entirely sure what kind of podcast you'd be interested in but i'll throw out a few of the goodies in my huge library of stuff , i'll miss out a few of the HUGE podcasts that have been all over tumblr though

a LOT of it is true crime or human interest stuff , or history because im nerd ,, and a few of these dont have nearly enough attention so [shrug] i'll try to keep this short i guess lol this isnt EVERYTHING ive got in my library or listened series' by any measure

i AM gonna pop a shout to both Stuff You Missed in History Class and Stuff You Should Know from iHeartRadio because their HUGE archives have kept me from losing my mind many times over , and they cover a wide range of both important and wacky topics

BomBARDed (ongoing) this is the only fiction podcast i have happening right now really but its DAMN GOOD ONE .... it's an actual-play D&D 5E podcast in the DMs own musically-inspired world, focussed on a group of multiclass bards going to music school !! and all players (+DM) are members of the Texas band Lindby !! and they actually use and play music in the show with one original song an episode !! Kyle's worldbuilding and storycraft are truly incredible, and (Nick) Goodrich, (also Nick) Spurrier, and Ali's characters are in depth and interesting as well as an absolute powerhouse :') i actually made a piece for its first fanzine, Bardic Dreaming, which published earlier this year and is free to view now, all the players and the community are super wholesome its just very good overall 💙

History & Humans;

Fall of Civilisations (ongoing) legit one of my favourite podcast finds, im so glad my youtube autoplayed one of these ... it took me like 2 hours to realise it was 1) not the same as what was playing before and 2) had been on for 2 hours and wasnt near finished lmao. anyway, this is a series by historical fiction writer Paul Cooper, and is honest to all thats good one of the best documentary series ive encountered in years - and ive consumed a LOT of documentaries. it covered the downfall of various civilisations through history, and the episodes run from an hour to FOUR hours depending on the topic. its so chill to listen to and just get done, but over the pandemic all of the episodes have been given full movie-quality video versions too on youtube if youre more of a visual person.

Casting Lots: A Survival Cannibalism Podcast (on series break) yeah that says that lol ... its a SUPER niche topic but its very interesting and treated very well despite being kind of comical at times, the hosts are just naturally funny lol ... it delves around from the history of cannibalism in whole regions to specific incidents as recently as the 1970s, and of course the first episode is about the Donner Party, and it covers things ive never heard of despite being kind of important ?? anyway Alix and Carmella are good eggs

Sawbones (ongoing) i probably dont need to mention much here other than say that Justin and Sydnee saved me from being SO BORED sooo often, the history of medicine is wacky as hell and its what most of my history GCSE was on so [shrugs]

Cautionary Tales (on series break) this was a wild-card find lol ... it's by Tim Harford "the undercover economist" who writes for the Financial Times, and its topics kind of weave modern topics and science with how to learn from historical errors ... its a bit weird but well worth a go, also each series has a few celebrity guest voice actors which is pretty awesome

Ephemeral (ongoing) this is a very strange but thought provoking series about sounds and other things just barely saved. topics include the last castrato, the hello girls, hand-stamped records, the spread of kīkā kila music, and acoustic fossils of wild places.

Neat! The Boozecast (ongoing) history and bartending whats not to like lol ... hosted by Teylor Smirl and now their dad Tommy, they're just digging around in how important booze is to human culture

True Crime (white collar and weirdness);

Swindled (ongoing) this is an amazing show full stop. A Concerned Citizen details some of the most impactful and unruly things to happen in white collar and corporate crime. very factually accurate but given the sheer bullshit of the topics the deadpan snarking is [chefs kiss] absolutely warranted ..

American Scandal (on series break) this one is a series within a series type, and spends a few episodes at a time poking holes in some of America's biggest scandals, from a dramatised but fact-based point of view. such as what the hell was going on with Enron, how big tobacco was forced to own up to covering its own ass, how Iran-Contra happened, etc. it also now has a sister show called British Scandal, which does the same thing for British cases but with a slightly different format.

Missing in Alaska (finished) this was a fascinating series, a deep dive into what happened to two US government officials who disappeared on a small chartered flight in Alaska in 1972. it goes some really strange places, but it actually turned up a lot of previously unknown information through the audience. John Walczak's new series in a new feed is Missing on 9/11 which looks into what happened to Dr Sneha Philip.

Pretend (ongoing) Host Javier Leiva holds interviews with anyone living a lie, or who have been touched by them. con artists, snake oil salesmen, former cult members, catfishing victims, anyone and everyone.

Power: The Maxwells (finished) hosted by journalist Tara Palmeri, the story of media tycoon Robert Maxwell from nothing to empire to mysterious death and the scandals uncovered after he was gone.

Lets Talk About Sects (ongoing) Sarah Steele covering cults from around the world, in particular those in Australia - where she is from. She often has former members on the show to share their stories, and share knowledge of how they left. each story has the relevant content warnings at the start of each episode.

Brainwashed (finished) investigation of the CIA's covert mind control experiments, centred on the experiments performed at a hospital in Montreal, and its cultural impact.

Dr Death (2 series finished) two series investigating huge cases of fraud and medical malpractice, and how they were brought to a stop. series 1 covers Dr Duntsch and his horribly butchered neurosurgery, series 2 covers Dr Fata and his fraudulent cancer clinic

The Immaculate Deception (finished) untangling the weird and disturbing fertility fraud of Dr Jan Karbaat, who fathered children himself through his fertility clinic, and the impact of his deception. later episodes also touch on other similar cases.

True Crime (Violent/General);

The Casual Criminalist (ongoing) Simon Whistler of-the-many-youtube-channels cold reads a script about the case of the day, with some of his daft commentary thrown in.

Southern Fried True Crime (ongoing) Crimes from the American South hosted by Erica Kelley, she puts all the facts out there but refreshingly for true crime she doesnt hesitate to tell you if she thinks someone is human garbage lol

They Walk Among Us (ongoing) probably one of the most popular UK crime podcasts, very measured and well put together, not weird or annoying about it either.

All Crime No Cattle (ongoing, feed slowed down for now) specifically about crimes from Texas, hosted by Erin and Shay, they're very sensitive hosts and a lot of the cases they cover shed light on why the Texas criminal system is how it is or show an impact at a national level

Canadian True Crime (ongoing) Canadian crime from an Aussie who's lived there for a decade, Kristi is again a sensitive and measured host covering some important topics

True Crime (Violent/Deep Dive);

Hitman (finished) journalist Jasmyn Morris digs around in the sticky tangle around a book published by fringe publisher Paladin Press, and its apparent use as a blueprint in the killing of a mother, her friend and her 8 year old boy for financial gain.

Camp Hell: Anneewakee (ongoing) this series is exploring how a wilderness camp "correctional facility" was endorsed by the Georgia care and juvenile reform system, despite widespread abuses and shady practices the whole time. warning for csa and child cruelty throughout.

True Crime Bullshit (on series break) this one is a huge huge rabbithole but a very interesting one where the host Josh Hallmark has spent years digging into the life and potential crimes of Israel Keyes. Keyes is often mentioned as a serial killer with no pattern, but in picking it apart thats not quite true, and has sparked some re-evaluations of missing persons cases and stumbling upon information the FBI has redacted organically. there's also a series in the middle looking into the crimes of Kelly Cochran

Forgotten: Women of Juárez (finished) this series looks into the huge numbers of missing women of Ciudad Juárez, the strange circumstances surrounding them, and the potential cover-ups and corruptions on both sides of the border, trying to give a voice to all of the forgotten women and girls and their families without answers. the series itself is finished, but a spanish language edition is being released every week now.

aaaaaand i'll call it there before i list everything lol, i hope you find something to plug your boredom hole with !!

#audio #rory's ramblings #podcasts #asks #anon #long post

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wexhappyxfew · 3 years

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i literally choked on my pizza when i saw your writing and analyzing questions post, I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!! first of all, what sort of process do you go through when creating characters? what kind of things do you take into consideration when creating them? i’m fascinated because creating characters is far from easy, especially when you’re creating someone like agent mortem! i’m always interested to know what the writer’s thought process was when creating a new character!

okay, so secondly, i wouldn’t say i’m having trouble with keeping all my planning organised and ‘precise’ in a way, but it’s really not easy 😅 i was wondering what kind of processes you go through when planning, whether you have like a specific structure or a set of steps to follow, or if you just kind of roll with it? at the moment when i plan it’s okay and it makes sense, but it’s literally just 4 or 5 pages of really chunky paragraphs which makes it really difficult to pick out the events again when i come to needing the plan to help me. i don’t really know if you do anything different, but if there is any way you know of that i could keep it more organised and easy to follow, that would be great :)

i’ll keep the last ones a little shorter because this ask is already looking veryyy long — what have you enjoyed writing about natia, what struggles have you faced and what have you learned? and basically the same with agent mortem if that’s possible :) i have asked a LOT of questions in this, so don’t feel like you have to answer them all because it will probably take quite a while 😅 anyway, thank you for putting up with my endless questions, and i hope you have a good day <33

ROSE AH HELLO MY FRIEND!!!! <333 sorry ive just gotten to this omg! it’s been sitting here for a little while but i’ve just had so much going on right now and wanted to make sure when i answered that my *full attention* was put on this! (because i’ve been very excited to answer this ESPECIALLY as i see agent mortem questions poking up on here and that just makes me even more hype!!! :D enjoy! <3

Ooooo this is a cool question! I’ve been asked it before but I feel with different characters and such, it always seems to fluctuate for me at least? In the sense, it’s almost never the same process for me in the developmental stages of a character haha! Sometimes I get characteristics first hand, or sometimes a certain scene pops up that just makes the character click and I can build from there, or sometimes, it’s just a last name or a first name that I work with and suddenly have an idea for!

For example, since we’re on the general topic of Landslide, I’ll talk about some things I did when creating specifically Natia. The “Natia” who is currently portrayed in the fic, was not always really like that. Natia initially was not a SOE Agent/Polish Resistance Fighter and instead a Dutch Resistance Member who would meet with Easy in Episode 4. I always sort of knew Natia, in whatever form she was, would meet Easy in Episode 4, but I wasn’t sure how, so the building in the first 17 chapters was the toughest part to come.

I did heavily feel the Polish were underrepresented in terms of the situation of the war along with everything that happened in the Warsaw Uprising and so I felt it was important to see if I could do something with that and that’s really where Natia came into play!

Natia means “hope” essentially and something I really like doing with her character is to parallel or juxtapose different ideas together, to continue on this sort of theme of her being a quite ominous and ambiguous character — you get the general sense of what her morals are, but in certain points it’s questionable. Morally-ambiguous characters have always been fascinating to me, especially female morally-ambiguous characters and so creating Natia in that respect I felt would be interesting to see what I could do!

Something major that I’ve slowly began to take into consideration with characters more and more, is the sort of general theme I want to be present with them — what’s that goal i that they are moving towards in the end and what’s the them surrounding it? For Natia it’s a multitude of things; family, revenge, being silenced, numb, grief, mentor vs protégé, lone wolf etc….the list could truly go on! And with these basic sort of ideas and themes, I can then move on from there and expand.

Why did she want REVENGE? Because the enemy killed her FAMILY, which is extremely important to her, and she wants to feel some sort of REDEMPTION for them.

Why was she BEING SILENCED? Because of the *past* conflict of the HARMFUL MENTOR VS SILENCED PROTÉGÉ situation that occurred between Agent Mortem and herself, where she allowed herself to be silenced by someone who abused the SUDDEN POWER he never had before in his life, ultimately leading to her continued issues of TRUST that she would meet throughout.

Why is she NUMB? Because at a fairly young age she experienced heavy and intense GRIEF that struck unforgivably at a time where it seemed things were safe. To rip something from a character, especially the main character, like FAMILY which is extremely important, you pull at the heart strings and it makes that character move forward on a quest for that in a way, ultimately by the end of the fic. (Basically you up they are least get a semblance of that lost thing, found again by the end)

Why is she a LONE WOLF? Because of the MENTOR VS PROTÉGÉ situation yet again, where she was taught to rely strictly on herself and no one else and so when TRUST and COMPANIONSHIP and TEAMWORK were introduced to her character, she didn’t know how to cope because she had been so desensitized to the ways of Agent Mortem that working back in the morals of family and friends was a challenge in its own respect.

It’s sort of a like a ripple effect if you think about it and that’s what helps me eventually move forward and develop the character arc I want to take place. She’s this way because of this — sort of like cause and effect. It’s really helped me out with major scenes or plot holes that have risen throughout the fic!

AGREED! Writing in general is not an easy feat and now including mind you ORIGINAL CHARACTERS, you’re literally, essentially, creating human beings from scratch and giving them characteristics, a backstory, trauma if you wish, friends and family, people they love, people they hate, morals, standards EVERYTHING! ITS INSANE! AH AND AGENT MORTEM! I’m so very glad that you brought him up, because his creation definitely stemmed directly from the want to experiment with the relationship of failed mentor vs protégé, entirely. I wanted a foil to Natia that was not directly with her all the time. Mortem plays such a MASSIVE role in her story and yet any interactions between the two are either from her mind or from memories and that’s just such a fun way to play around with their dynamic! (I just finished the creation of his backstory and character arc I want him to take and it’s only made me even more excited for what’s to ultimately come for him as well as Natia!)

A song that HEAVILY represents their dynamic is Ghost by Marvin Brooks (2WEI) and I’ll explain why. Even though Mortem is not always inherently *with* Natia, he still is a huge factor of her life, and still heavily controlling many aspects of her life such as recurring memories, reactions, and how she is also conditioned to react to certain things as well. He is essentially a “ghost” who is “haunting” Natia and I feel that’s an interesting take on their connection because they’re two people who clearly had a power struggle and a difference of opinions of multiple things and that just makes it so incredibly interesting to write!

song:

OOOOOO good question!!! So many people have such different ways of approaching story writing and planning and drafting and writing and editing and it’s honestly amazing!! I will say, I’m not an excessive planner or even a real great planner with writing, I never really have, and even as I’ve developed my writing and learned that “it’s okay to slow down”, or “it’s okay to take time for different portions to provide a deeper focus”, I still have not been someone to plan out every bit of my writing.

Reason being is I enjoy seeing where I can take the story in that time and place. Maybe if I’m doing a quick little writing segment and suddenly this idea just appears and hits me, I work it into the fic and it takes it a whole new direction and I end up not being super upset about it because it just…it works! And of course, this is not how other people operate and I have every respect for people who plan and have every detail laid out and figured out and just….completely and utterly planned to the dot. Lile kudos to people who genuinely get the planning all cleaned up before even writing, truly.

I just finalized Agent Mortem’s backstory and where I want his character arc to go and I’ve had him as a character since August of last year LOL! But ya know sometimes, I sit and I think back and go, maybe I wasn’t ready at that time to develop him completely yet because I, the writer, didn’t understand him enough to and I had to write more of him to be able to get a grasp of who he was and his character (and just about everything else!) and that’s okay!!! :)

Going with this idea I just stated above — the 4 or 5 pages of info — KEEP IT MY FRIEND!!! I swear, half the reason ideas even come to me is simply because I just write a big info dump that has all my little ideas somewhere inside and will ALWAYS be there. I recommend maybe taking a day though - away from focusing on writing or editing - and just picking that apart. (That’s what I did the other day and it helped me out MAJORLY! and it was worth it in the end!) Maybe keep the original 4-5 pages and then copy and paste the same thing in another doc so you always have the original!

And then just go through and split ideas apart! If you start reading and see it moving into another realm of headspace of ideas, just press enter and separate the two — you didn’t delete it, it’s still there and still intact! It’s just easier to look at now because instead of two, jumbled and completely different ideas, you now have two paragraphs and portions of text that relate to their own respective idea. It definitely makes it an easier pill to swallow when trying to get yourself organized!!

This really helped me when I was in my beginning stages of figuring out Landslide ESPECIALLY the first 17ish chapter where Natia was not in contact with Easy yet. I’ve explained it before but those chapters are there because we are seeing her final days with the resistance in Warsaw and how she ultimately ends up with Easy PLUS we see who she is as a character by herself and how she is not merely an extension off of Easy, but her own character, her own person. She has her own story and her own morals and ways of going about her life that don’t even relate to Easy. Their paths just happened to cross!! :)

By getting those first 17ish chapters planned, not extreme planning though I will admit, half the scenes were very much thought up on the spot for example like Natia driving to Munich in disguise or the introduction of Zdzich — two very important scenes that show us something about Natia. (1) She’s willing to go to extreme lengths for the people she loves to ensure that in the end they are safe, even if it means sacrificing herself and (2) she has trouble realizing that there are people out there that genuinely care for her, a connection to her ultimate, unruly and upsetting past. And the best part about it is THESE WEREN’T EVEN PLANNED! So sometimes, just let the story take the reigns and your mind and just guide you through it. Sometimes it is for the best :)

If you have your basic ideas and concepts and themes for how you want your fic to eventually go, the scenes for me most of the time just appear I guess when they should. Sometimes even in the times I'm not writing, I sit theorizing and questioning and thinking and developing ideas in my mind and it's a real good exercise, so when you get back to writing, you already know where you want the fic leading in the end!

MAN I LOVE THIS QUESTION. Anytime I can provide some meta or give some insight to Natia who is just one of the best characters I’ve gotten the pleasure of working with, I’ll gladly answer!

The thing I enjoy writing about Natia the most I feel, and I’ll probably always say this, is her complexity — as a writer, her character orders a healthy challenge for me that I gladly have accepted! You don’t know everything about her as a reader and as you read each chapter, that’s how you slowly uncover and discover what she hid about herself to protect herself. There’s so many different aspects of her that I could discuss truly!! (There has been so many parts that I’ve scrapped because I read through and just think “Man this doesn’t seem like Natia!”. She’s tricky sometimes to stake down exactly how she would react because of her past and her trauma and how long she’s been in war, but I just LOVE it!)

Many different aspects of her character though, come from her past and that’s what makes her interesting. I’ve really enjoyed working with the ideology of “Chekov’s Gun”, a writing device that can be used, with how I will mentioned something and it almost might seem out of the blue, yet later it all just makes sense?! When the flashback is revealed or a small portion of her past is finally allowing *light* in. It's a device I've used with Natia that has just really helped to develop her story at the pace I want it to be revealed! :D

For example, the OCEAN is mentioned many times. I make constant reference to the WAVES, the RECESSION of them from time to time, the comparison of the OCEAN both ABOVE and BELOW surface — all of that sorta stuff! For her character, it seems a bit out of place. She’s COLD. She’s NUMB. She’s BROKEN. What does an open body of water consuming at least 70% of the Earth have to do with an OC based in Warsaw, Poland?

This is where the importance of her PAST will play it’s role, as it has a major INFLUENCE on her and her CHARACTER and her MORALS. One of the main reasons the OCEAN is inherently connected to Natia is because of her PAST and one of those main reasons is AGENT MORTEM and her TRAINING, especially WATER training. I can’t comment further on this though as readers have only touched the tip of the iceberg for the use of the OCEAN and it’s IMPORTANCE so far in this fic! (Ask me again about it once this fic is finished up for the most part, unless….by Part 4 readers understand why!)

Natia just remains a character who constantly is developing and changing inside my head - where I want her path to ultimately end up leading by the end of the fic, where I want both her mental head space vs emotional head space should be and etc. So many portions of this fic are dealt specifically on her internal monologue and how she calculates and problem solves from that portion of her sort of *engagement* within the conflict. There never seems to be a dull moment when writing her!

Another thing I really have enjoyed about writing Natia is her clashing personality traits that make her interesting to write in both different scenarios and reactions. She's stubborn yet humble. She's numb and cold but internally extremely caring and giving and filled with these bottled up emotions. She's mentally strong yet she's been through so much and let the war take so much. She never complains about what she's doing, but she's lost nearly everyone she loves. She's a fighter in this war and refuses to back down from a battle she know she can wage, but the second she is pulled from the aspect of war, things crash and burn around her. Just even these few combating sort of things, really show her character and what, through writing, has slowly developed! They always lay around in the back of my mind and it's one of the main things I remind myself when I write Natia all the tme.

I think one of the most important things I've learned from both writing and creating a character like Natia is that (1) it's okay to ask for help, about anything, literally anything. You don't have to confine everything to yourself and build up this immense pressure to do what you must to continue moving forward. It's okay to have people there to help you and support you. (2) It's okay to be strong alone and even if you seem to be the only one on the current path you're are on, it does not mean you are wrong. it can still lead to the right destination in the end!

Oooo okay! AGENT MORTEM!! I am totally down to chat about some things I've loved to write with him with and some challenges I've discovered, but as far as what I've learned from him, I will be holding off and could answer that when the entire fic is both completed and then updated on platforms....just because ;) don't want to give away any spoilers haha! <3

Something I've enjoyed about writing and crafting Agent Mortem is letting him remain as mysterious and secretive as he is for so long. Initially, I can't even begin to recall what his character would be like even a year ago, but seeing where he has developed now, I'm really happy with where he is. He's mysterious, he's shadowed, he seems like a figure in the background, a past mentor who is half deranged and lost his mind with a background with so substance. It makes for such a fascinating way to begin to reveal his past! (something I've began to insert into part 4 of Landslide and man I'm just so HYPE!)

I feel I'm excited simply because he's finally getting the time and moment he deserves to finally explain and show himself as to what has occurred. There's so many fractured and disconnected parts of what is currently going on with Natia and her connection to both Agent Mortem and then Death is tossed in the mix and it seems this big complicated mess of 'how' Agent Mortem got to be this way, 'why' he does a thing such as this, just different and varying aspects such as that. it makes for those big final reveals to all be even more worth it!

He has been quite the challenge though I will admit. There's so many perspectives he could quite possibly be viewed from and his *character* + morals/values could be pulled in a various amount of ways as well. Making sure he accurately comes across the way I want him to both appear and come across to the reader and to myself has definitely been tricky. He's not as easy as suspected, you know, not just a 'dude who had a bad day and went insane in the end', there's a whole multitude of levels and reasons and a deep, heavy and traumatizing background starting from his birth really (which is a whole other story). Managing and balancing that all in one has definitely been something I've had to keep on top of and monitor but I feel has really been worth the challenge in the end. Because at the end of the day, I'm someone looking to constantly challenge myself.

And a good challenge, whether it be writing or academics or a workout, is healthy and GOOD! That's what Landslide in a whole has really shown me, to challenge yourself daily to see where you can push yourself and your imagination and creativity, just to see where you can even go!! it's exciting and refreshing!

Thank you so much for this wonderful ask Rose! I appreciate it more than ANYTHING as you well know, and I know it's taken me *quite* some time to answer, but I've been working on it for weeks now and finally got it out because it was ready! I really wanted to take my time with it and develop it to its full potential in the end and I feel I have (without giving away any spoilers haha!) As always, please know if you have any further questions regarding Natia Filipska, Agent Mortem, Death (along with other characters of Landslide), writing, the process (my own included), tips for writing/planning, or just anything else in general, I will always be happy to help in anyway I can! You're always welcome, anyone always is!!! <3333 Thank you again, I had so much fun doing this more than anything! :D

#writing #writing tips #band of brothers #bob fic #band of brothers fic #also hello landslide day tmr and it’s a good one hehe :d #natia filipska #agent mortem #death (character)#basic aid on characters + writing/planning #plus gathering thoughts #thank you again for this rose! i had so much fun! <3333

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1990 Review: Still Possesses Turtle Power After All These Years

Cowabunga all you happy people! I freaking love the Teenage Ninja Turtles. I grew up with it from Turtles in Time, which was my first video game, to the 2003 cartoon, which I covered the first three episodes of last month, and on to present day as I re-read the idw comics after finally reading the original eastman and laird run of mirage, and impatiently waiting for Shredder’s Revenge to come out after a LONG drout of no good TMNT games. I”m a fan of these heroes four, their dynamic as a family, the endless possiblities that come from it’s long history and ablitlity to go anywhere in any genre, and the wonderful goofy shit that happens when you have a franchise about mutant turtles learning ninjitsu from a rat and fighting a dude covered in knife covered samurai armor.

So with me finally covering the guys after almost a year last month and with a new movie set to debut at some point this year, I had the bright idea to revisit the FIRST TMNT movie after way too many years of not watching it. This movie is anear and dear to my heart: When I first started getting into the boys big as a kid with the 2003 cartoon, I badly wanted more turtles. But back then it wasn’t nearly as easy to glom onto some more of the sewer shock pizza kings: Streaming sites with all the cartoons on them weren’t all that accesable, dvd’s were expensive for the 87 cartoon, Mirage wasn’t reprinting the comics in any meaningful way and my local comic shop didn’t have any at all and I could only play the SNES when my brother had it set up on occasion like at our Grandma’s farm.

As you probably guessed though there was one exception: the original 1990 movie, which I got at Walmart for 5 bucks and haven’t let go of since. It was one of my first dvds and is still one of my most precious. Said film hit the spot just right as like my beloved 2003 series, it was a mildly goofy but still fucking cool adaptation that stuck closer to the mirage comics, even more than the 2003 series would, while taking a few queues from the 87 series. This film is as precious to me as the 2003 series and a with a brand new movie coming up, I figured it was the exact right time to dig into this classic: what makes it still good to this day, what’s fun to point and laugh at, and how the heck Jim Henson got involved in this. So join me under the cut as I take a look at my boys first theatrical outing and why I still love watching a turtle.

No One Wanted To Make This: Before we get into the film itself some background. As usual I struggled a bit, but thankfully found some help in the form of this Hollywood Reporter article. It’s a fascinating read worth your time, providing an oral history of the film from the people who worked on it.

The film was the baby of Gary Propper, a surfer dude and road manager for the prop comic Gallagher, aka that guy who used to smash watermelons but now has instead opted to smash what little’s left of his career by being a homophobic douchenozzle. He found an ally in Showtime producer Kim Dawson who’d produced Gallagher’s special. I don’t think there will be more of an 80′s sentence than “Gallagher’s surfer dude agent wanted to make a teenage mutant ninja turtles movie”. Propper was a huge fan of the comics, and with Dawson’s help convinced Laird and Eastman to let them option it to studios.

It may come as a shock to you but the road agent for a homophobic watermelon man and a producer at a niche cable channel wanting to make a movie based on an underground comic book about masked turtles at a time when the two most recent comic book movies were Superman IV: The Quest for Peace and Howard the Duck, did not go well. Every door in Hollywood got slammed in their face, even Fox> Even the eventual backer of the film, Golden Harvest, a hong kong action film studio, took months to convince to actually back the film.

Things did not get easier from there: The films writer Bobby Herbeck had trouble getting a story agreed on because Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird’s working relationship had deteroiated horribly from the stress so naturally the two could not agree on a damn thing and argued with each other. Peter Laird made a tense siutation even worse by constnatly sniping at Herbeck and feeling he was a “Hollywood outsider infringing on his vision and characters”

Granted the script was apparently not great... but Pete still comes off as a pretnetious ass who views his weird indie comic as THE HIGHEST OF HIGH CALLINGS HOW DARE YOU SOIL IT. And continued to be kind of a prick like this throughout the rest of his time with the property.

Thankfully the film found i’ts voice, vision and director in Steve Barron. Barron was a music video guy who knew the producers and while reluctant, eventually dove into the project rightfully thinking the film would need to be a mix of the mirage comics and 87 cartoon, keeping aprils’ reporter job, the turtles lvoe of pizza and their iconic color coding from the cartoon but adapting several stories from the comics as the backbone of the film. The guys liked barron MUCH better and things ran smoother.

Barron also brought in one of the film’s biggest selling points and it’s most valuable asset: it’s triumphantly awesome Jim Henson costumes. Barron had worked with good old Jim on the music videos for Labyrinth, and while it took some convincing since the comics were violent as hell and that wasn’t Jim’s style, Barron eventually got him on board. This naturally doubled the budget, but given Henson’s costumes STILL hold up today and look better than the cgi used in the platinum dunes films... it was a good call. And this was brand new tech for jim, having to invent tons of new ideas and mechanisms just to make the things work, and said things still were absolute hell on the actors. Jim later ended up not liking the film for being too violent... which I find hilarious given how many muppets got eaten or blowed up real good on his show but regardless, I thank this legendary and wonderful man as without him this film WOULD NOT have worked. The costumes here look great, feel realistic, and you can’t tell the actors were dubbed much less horribly suffering in those suits. Much like Disney Land.

The film would get picked up for distribution by New Line, and despite i’ts weird as hell origins and the long shot it had.. the film was a MASSIVE hit at the box office, owing to a combination of Batman 89 the previous year having proved comic book movies can work for audiences, the cartoon’s runaway sucess, and a massive marketing campaign. The film made it’s mark. So now we know how we got here let’s get into the film itself.

What’s the Story Morning Glory?:

So the story for this one is largely cobbled together from some of the more notable arcs Eastman and Laird did before handing off the book to others full time as the stress of the company and the mounting tension with each other made it near impossible to work together on the book itself.

To Save time i’m just going through what hte movie takes from the comics plot wise now to save me the trouble later:The movie takes elements from the first issue (The Turtles, Splinter and Shredder’s backstories, Shredder being fully human and the main antagonist, Shredder’s design and the final rooftop showdown that results in Shredder’s death), second and third, (April’s apartment over her dad’s old store and the turtles moving in when their home is ransacked and splinter has gone missing), the rapheal micro series (A tounge in cheek way of cashing in on the Mini-Series craze of the 80s, a one shot by modern standards and something that’s tragically been underused as an idea as only TMNT and MLP have used the idea at IDW, Raph meeting casey and their fight with one another), the return of shredder arc (One of the turtles being ambushed and mobbed by the foot and then thrown though a sky light (Leo in the comic and Raph here), the turtles being horribly outnumbered by them, Casey coming ot the rescue and metting the non-raph turtles for the first time, and them being forced to escape when the place goes up in flames), their exile to northampton (April writing in a journal, casey working on a car with one of the guys and one of hte guys looking over hteir injured brother), and finally, their triumphant return which was very loosely adapted as there are no deformed shredder clones and shredder not being dead yet in this version was not brought back by a colony of super science worms.

So as for how this all comes together: Our story takes place in New York: A crimewave is high with muggings mysterious. There are a ton of phantom thefts going around and at most people have been seeing teens responsibile. And the police.. are at about this level of useful:

The only person doing something is April O’Neil, played by Judith Hoag. Hoag is easily the standout of the film, giving us a strong, confident woman with a wonderful sense of humor. She honestly might be my faviorite April O Neil, and given we’ve had some great ones with 2003, 2012 and Rise, that’s not something I say lightly. I honestly wish I’d recognized her in more stuff as she was both on Nashville and the mom in the Halloween Town films, and most recently was on the ScFy show the magicians. She’s a talented lady and i’m glad she’s still goin.

April is a reporter for Channel 3 like the cartoon, though for some weird reason her boss from the cartoon is replaced by Charles Pennigton, played by Jay Patterson, whose currently dealing with his troubled son Danny, played by Micheal Turney. Pennington is horribly useless at both jobs: At work he tries to ease April off calling out Chief Sterns, who refuses to listen to April’s evidence gathered from japanese immigrants that the crimes resemble similar ones in japan in favor of trying to get charles to shut her up. Danny meanwhile is a member of the foot becase his dad thinks shouting out him and talking about him like he’s not there and generally being a dipstick will actually do anything to help him.

I love the concept for the foot here. In addition to being a Ninja Violence Gang as always, they now recruit new members by finding kids without families or with troubled family lives and giving them a sense of family with the foot, and sweeting the bargin with a giant cave filled with arcade machines, a skate ramp and general late 80′s early 90′s kids goodies. Is it rediculous? Yes. Is it also clever as it gives Shredder an easy army of plausably deniable theives that he can pick the best out of to put in his elite that will be tirelessly loyal to him and him alone? Also yes.

So April being public about this stuff gets her attacked, which naturally leads to our heroes coming in, first in the shadows and later directly when April wont’ give up on the case and Shredder sends some ninjas to go shut her up.. which he does weirdly as the guy jsut slaps her and tells her to cut it out like he’s on a domestically abusive episode of Full House. Raph saves her, and we get the turtles origin.. though weirdly they cut it in half. We get the ooze portion but Splinter’s past with Saki, Saki’s murder of his master and his master’s partern Tang Shen is left for later in the film and the fact Shredder’s saki is treated as a big twist despite the fact the biggest audience for the film would be kids... and kids would’ve been familiar with the cartoon where the giant brain monster routinely screeches out saki at the shredder. Maybe Barron just thought he was an alcoholic I don’t know. It just would’ve made more sense to have it all at once and let the audeince put it together.

April becomes good friends with the turtles over a night of frozen pizza and camradrie, but the Splinters return home to find it ransacked, Splinter kidnapped by the foot, and are forced to Stay with april. Charles meanwhile tries to get April to backoff because he made a deal with the police to clear Danny’s record, without TELLING her any of this mind you, but I will save my rage on that little plot point for in a bit as Danny who he drug along sees the turtles and tells the Shredder.

So we get the return of the shredder arc as Raph goes through a window, our heroes fight valiantly, and Raph’s friend Casey who he met earlier shows up, the two having bonded as all true friends do.. by beating the shit out of each other ending with raph shouting DAMNNNNNNN really big and dramatically into the sky for some reason. The Turtles and friends escape with an injured raph from April’s burning second hand store. She had a second hand store it was poorly established and only there because she had it in the comics.

Our heroes retreat to a farm April’s grandma owned in Northampton, Massachutes, where Mirage was located at the time the original comics where they were exiled to the place were written and a location that has been a staple of the turtles ever since. The turtles slowly recover, lick their wounds, talk about who hooked up with who on gilligans island etc, before Leo connects with Splinter via meditation, who tells them to come back. Splinter also starts to connect with Danny and convinces him to swtich sides.. or at the very least squat in the boys old home.

The boys return home, find danny, and prepare, Danny goes back and ends up giving away the Turtles are home.. but the turtles are ready and in an awesome sequence kick the fuck out of the foot squad sent for them with some well prepared steam vents. Casey goes to get splinter since Danny told them and with Danny’s help, finds him, since Danny found out they were gonna kill him. Casey beats up Tatsu, shredder’s right hand man, and they get him out.

We get our final fight which is awesome up until the climax.. which is splinter casually tripping shredder with nunchucks and thier bloody history being kind of rushed and unsatsifying. Casey crushes shredder with a garbage truck, April gets her job back, more on that in a moment, she and casey hook up, and we end with the fucking awesome song T-U-R-T-L-E Power by partners in cryme. Seriously check it out it’s fucking triumphant.

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The song is just good.. cheesy? Sure but that’s half the fun. It’s the gold standard for movie theme songs for them and stacks up handily with the various animated series themes.. all of which slap. Okay... ALMOST all of which slap. Fast Forwards is aggressively medicore, which is doubly suprising to me since 4kids was REALLY damn good with theme songs. It was one of the three things they were best at along with finding VERY talented voice actors and setting japan based works in america because merica dammit.

The plot is very solid: It skilfully packed half of eastman and laird’s run on TMNT into 90 mintues while adding things like April’s job at channel 9, the way the foot recurited kids etc. The plot flows well for hte most part and apart from one annoying subplot we’ll get to never has a moment that feel unecessary or dosen’t pay off later. And the stellar plot and fun pacing of it helps boilster the characters that do work... and help paper over the ones that are so thin the’yd fall down a grate...

Our Heroes, Villains and Annoying Middle Aged Guys:

Yeahhhh character is hit and miss here. Some are rather strong, others are the bare basics for the character their adapting and most are just to serve the plot but some work some don’t, So let’s talk about it starting with our boys:

Raph is the most fleshed out of the turtles, being the main focus of the first 2/3 of the film, and having his anger be part of what SHOULD be a character arc, learning to temper it. And while granted MOST TMNT properties do this, to the point that Rise Raph is so loveable in part because his boisterous bruiser big bro attitude is a refreshing break from the usual grumpus we get. But at the time this hadn’t been done in every version but the 87 cartoon, so exploring it was valid.. but despite saying this should be a thing htey just forget about it and the most plot relevance he gets is going thorugh a window. He dosen’t really get a resolution.. his arc just kind of stops dead for the final half and it’s one of the film’s weaker points, one I only just now noticed on this rewatch. He’s still the most entertaining.

Leo is the weakest of the turtles. He really lacks a personality here mostly just being leader and while his spirtual side is touched on, it’s mostly a plot device. He’s just kinda the leader because he was in the comics to the point Partners in Cryme called Raph the leader. His role in getting taken out by the foot was taken by Raph, so he just has.. nothing to do for most of the film other than gripe at raph ocasionally and say orders. He’s probably the worst Leo i’ve seen outside of Next Mutation. I prefice that because after watching Phelous’ review it’s VERY clear those four are the worst versions of the characters, and no personality is still better than either having your team do nothing or yelling at them as your personality. I chalk this up to the Mirage Leo, and the mirage turtles to a poit being kind of bland. Not TERRIBLE characters, especially for the time, but not nearly as fleshed out or individualized as they woudl be in other adpatations, and with most traits LEo DID have, like his badassery flat out gone, he’s just.. nothing here.

Mikey and Donnie are a double act here with both sharing a brain. Interestingly instead of his normal genius character, Donnie is Mikey’s best friend and the two simply trade jokes and schtick together. The two are interchangable.. but easily the best part of the film and a lot of the most memorable gags and lines, from Ninja Kick the Damn Rabbit! to “Do you like Penicllin on your pizza”, are from them. Thier there almost entirely as comic relief but it works, with both clealry being more modled ont he 87 cartoon turtles, a move that helps lighten the mood in darker moments. Their just genuinely charming and it’s intresting to see such a diffrent version of Donnie, and other incarnations, specifically the 2003 and Rise versions, would retain the sarcastic edge.

Splinter is splinter. That’s about it, he’s peformed well and the puppet is amazing but he gets kidnapped a half an hour in and outside of influcencing Denny, more on that in a moment, and finishing Shredder he dosen’t do much but spout exposition. He’s not bad or anything, but he’s essentially a rodent shaped plot device. He was also puppeted by Kevin CLash, aka the guy who does Elmo. So there you go.

April on the other hand.. is truly excellent. This might be my faviorite April. Judith’s april nicely blends the cartoon and mirage versions: She has the cartoons energy and job, but the comics sheer will and casual nature. Judith just oozes personality and her April is just a joy to watch, from her breezy chemistry filled interactions with the guys to her confrntation with Chief Sterns, knowing she’ll get thrown out by the asshole. She’s confident, and even when afraid dosen’t back down to her attackers and even helps out during the sewer ambush. I mean it’s a pot on the head but still it’s neat. She’s easily the best part of the flim and the most fleshed out of the cast. The worst I can say is they kinda shove her store from the comics, Second Time Around, in there for no other reason than it was in the comics: It dosen’t come up until it’s needed for the foot’s assault on her place. But overall.. she’s just fantastic to watch.

Speaking of fantastic to watch, Elias Koteas is fantastic as Casey. Seriously he’s only second to the 2003 version in my eyes, getting the concept of a testorone filled average guy who decided to just go out and hit people with sports equipment after watching too much A-Team.. I mean that part of it’s not in this version but it’s implied, just right. Like judith, Elias is just really funny to watch and his big scenes, showing up just in time during the foot assault on april’s place and his fight with Tatsu are some of the best parts of the film, the former taken directly from the comics. This version isn’t without problems: His friendship with Raph, his most endearing aspect and one that has been carried throughout eveyr version Casey’s important, with the only exception so far being rise and we have a movie to fix that, is absent here. HE does save the guy, but they don’t really bond or anything. In fact he disappears for about half an hour after his big fight with Raph. But... again he’s just so damn entertaining, down to his JOSEEEEEEEEEEE Conseco bats (There was a two for one sale!).

Shredder is just a LITTLE better than splinter, if only because his actor projects a true aura of menace and I feel this version had some influence on the pants crappingly terrifying 2003 version. And the idea of the foot recurting teenagers like I said is a good one: He gives them home and a cause, they give him plausably deniable backup. And his fight with the boys in the climax is really awesome... the conclusion sucks but otherwise h’es okay. Not the deepest villian, but he has enough presence to be enjoyable.

His right hand man Tatsu, whose been adapted ocasionally since this and reimaigned as Natsu in the IDW comics, a female version, is also fine. He’s your standard grimacing goon but has enough presence to work.

So that brings us to the penningtons. Charles, april’s boss at the station and his son Danny who’s joined the foot as he feels his dad dosen’t love him. Charles..is about as interesting and likeable as a dog turd and is the worst aspect of the film. No debate there, he just sucks. He sucks so hard he’s classified as a black hole. The film wants you to see him as a put upon wokring dad whose frustrated with his son’s increased moodiness, skipping school and crminal undertakings and just wants to help him and loves him deep down. The problem is his actor’s delivery instead of concerned.. is just pissed. He just seems pissy and upset about the whole thing and comes off like he’s only mad about Danny doing this because he’s embarassing him and not because you know, it’s bad. When confronting Danny about stealing, he dosen’t consider MAYBE he’s part of a gang or needs help, but just wonders “Why are you stealing when I give you stuff”. Because, Dipshit, sometimes kids do crimes not because they need the stuff but because they WANT to, and because they want to act the fuck out.

The most he does for the kid is agree to try and get April to back off the police when Cheif Sterns offers to let Danny go and not put him on record in exchange for it. The problem.. is this makes him even MORE unsympathetic. While I do get wanting to help your child, I do and it’s a sucky position... he again should be sympathetic.. but he handles the thing so badly it sucks. He just tells april to ease off, with no reason given, then fires her when she SHOCKINGLY dosen’t give up taking the guy whose refusing to take her hard work seriously or actually solve the crime wave problem to task for his shitty behavior as ANY person facing a shitty, corrput cop would. She just wants to hold him acountable and get him to actually do something. He clearly knows her on a personal level too as he talks about his issues with his son freely with her, something you don’t do with an employee unless their also a friend on some level.

He could have TOLD april what was going on. She’d be furious at Stern’s naked corrpution and prioritizing shutting her up over actually solving crimes.. and thus put at least some of that energy into shutting him down or finding a way around it, going to the papers or something like that. Even in 1990 pre-internet, there were ways to get around Sterns blackmail and expose him so someone who’d actually do the job could get the job. Instead he just comes off as a selfish coward who rather than try and fight the guy blatantly abusing his power and using Charles own son as barganing chip, goes along with it because it’s the easier option to simply bow to him instead of TRY and stop this. And it’s not like he’s even going after a beloved public figure or someone who could hide behind his rep: Sterns was blatantly failing a crime wave, April had called him out on his failrues and coverups multiple times. The public was against sterns.. finding out he tried to blackmail the media into shutting up about him would PROBABLY end him... I only say probably not because the public wouldn’t skewer him, but because police tend to escape consequences for blatantly murdering someone on a daily basis and Andrew Cumo is STILl mayor over in new york, the same city this movie takes place, 31 years later, depsite EVERYONE asking him to resign over a long history of sexual harassment and a more recent but still horrible history of hiding death numbers. I don’t doubt people being stupid enough to ignore this or the bilaws with cops being stacked enough for him to get away with it, but just because someone gets away with a crime dosen’t mean you shoudln’t try and go after them in the first place. Fuck. Charles. Pennington.

Danny on the other hand is FAR more interesting and I think gets way too much flack when it comes to this subplot. Unlike his dad, whose dead weight, Danny is intresting: He provides a POV character for the foot’s MO in the film of taking in wayward teens, and his character arc is pretty engaging, slowly realizing the foot dosen’t care and that hte turtles are the good guys. HIs actor does a great job and while not the biggest presence, he’s not a bad addition to clan hamaoto and I wish other adaptations would find a way to use him. The pull between doing the right thing and his found family is a good struggle. My only real issue with his plot is the moviies flawed aseop about family. It tries to contrast shredder and his using the kids blatnatly with Splinter and Charles really loving their sons. And it works with Splinter and the kids because despite being a tad strict, Splinter clearly loves his sons and works with them to help them. The problem is ENTIRELY with Charles and Danny. As I said Charles love comes off as transasctional: He either thinks he can buy it or just expects it because he shot a bunch of goop into Danny’s mom after two minutes of disapointment. It dosen’t work with them because neither option is good for Danny. His father is neglectful, chooses throwing his jounralistic integrity out the window over talking to his son or his best friend about another way, and abrasive. Danny is no saint, he does do crimes, but it’s clearly a result of a shitty upbringing and the shredder and co actually offeirng him the love he desperatly craves. Danny goes to the foot because his dad is bad at his job but the film never adresses that and just expects Danny to go back to his dad because the plot says so. Danny would HONESTLY be better off with Splinter. No really. Sure he’d have to live in the sewers.. but he did so for a few weeks in the course of the movie. He’s fine down there. Splitner actually cares about him and took an intrest to him and knows how to raise a child. Let him become the fifth turtle. An aseop about family is not a bad thing: Loaded subject that it can be given how many outright abusive families exist, i’m one of the lucky ones who dosen’t have that issue, family is an important thing and can be a source of comfort and support. But this film tells you you should love and respect someone who does not love, respect or value you because he spent a minute in your mom’s vagina and that’s not how family should work and is outright dangerous to kids in an abusive situation. Love the film otherwise but fuck this aseop skyhigh.

Final thoughts:

Overall though.. the film is bodacious. It’s funny, well paced, has an awesome cast, and outside of a certain bald asswipe... it’s a really good superhero film. Is it the best i’ve seen? Nope. Not even close and character wise most of them are as thin as a wet paper bag covered in ranch dressing. But it’s still a fun as hell with awesome corepgraphy, a killer soundtrack, seriously the soundtrack is damn excellent and only didn’t get it’s own section because I didn’t have enough to say and some of the best effects work i’ve seen in a film in the turtle suits. If you haven’t seen it I urge you to check it out: it’s a breezy 90 minutes, it’s on hbo max and it’s a shell of a time. Will I do the next film?

We’ll see how this one does like wise and such, but I will be doing the rise film whenever it comes out this year. So look for that and keep possesing turtle power my dudes. If you liked this review subscirbe for more, join my patreon to keep this blog a chugging, comission a review if you have more turtle stuff you want me to cover, and comment on this. What do you think of the movie, what are your thoughts on the review, what can I do better, what other turtle stuff would you like me to cover/ Let me know and i’ll see you at hte next rainbow.

#teenage mutant ninja turtles #teenage mutant ninja turtles 1990 #leonardo #raphael #donetello #michealangelo #casey jones #april o'neil #the shredder #oroku saki #new line cinema #golden harvest #film #90's movies #the 90's #partners in cryme #judith hoag

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slitherbite · 3 years

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Berserk! I've never seen Berserk. What kind of story is it? The art looks incredible

Okay I'm going to start this off with a two disclaimers: 1) it's a very disturbing story with a lot of triggering content (like graphic rape ans csa) so I can't in my right mind say that I recommend it to anyone. 2) I think only read around 180-200 chapters out of 354, so im not even 2/3rds through the story.

Berserk is a medieval horror with supernatural elements, and while a lot of it appeal is that it's a grimdark grizzly gorey story with a lot of action and incredible art, it's actual heart lies in the relationships between characters. It takes a lot of time to establish the relationship between it's main characters, Guts, Griffith and Casca, and the way their personalities, ambitions and goals interract with each other is really fascinating to me. Their friendship is the driving force of the story of the 2nd arc and the tragedy that happens after it. As horrifying as some of the events are, it's a strangely human story about persevering through the worst possible things, especially since Guts is among the most unfortunate protagonists I can think of. Everything that could go wrong in his life took a turn for even worse, and while he's THE dark broody cool asshole macho guy that swings around a huge sword, a lot of his story revolves around the fact that he's learning to trust and love people. Griffith is fascinating too but I havent given him much thought. Casca is/was a very cool character but shes wasted potential because Miura is a misogynist

I enjoy the characters (later some more characters get introduced who are equally interesting as these three but ive barely scratched the surface with them) but the worldbuilding of it is also incredibly interesting because the gods and religion thats based on christianity is something evil and to be feared, no divine intervention can help the protagonist, only humans can help each other.

Overall the series has a LOT of problems (the content that is often there for pure shock value, the misogyny, some awful changes made to characters again for shock value and manpain) and i first got into it because of the stunning art, the manga is visually incredible, i binged the 1997 anime and the manga equivelent of it in about 10 days and i was NOT WELL LMAO. 1997 cuts some stuff out of the story but its very minor. it definitely gets into your head and its a very depressing read. I take months long breaks inbetween reading. I genuinely cant with a clean conscience say i recommend it but its been living in my head for over 2 years and its something thats pretty satisfying to pick apart, criticize and analyze.

#im planning a podcast with two friends so i can funnel my ramblings into that #asks #ask games #llycaons #berserk

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gothamcityneedsme · 3 years

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I saw this bouncing around my dash and decided to fill it out myself for fun :) I decided to not double-list any games, and I tried to mix up the companies I used too so that the list would be more unique.

Long post, so I’m doing a readmore for my longwinded part lol.

(read more)

Favorite Game: Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic 2: The Sith Lords - I could talk about this game forever. How it tears apart the Star Wars universe from within, how it creates a compelling story while challenging the usual themes, etc. I could talk for ages about the characters and how their motivations slot in place, and how this game lends itself to interpretation and analysis alongside roleplay. It’s just a wonderful game, one I deeply love and will always love. It’s a game that isn’t afraid to have you talk to other characters for twenty or thirty minutes at a time and honestly I’m always riveted at every line. This game deserves the cult fanbase it has, but I think there’s a lot the fanbase misses in appreciating this game. (Note...gameplay is a little janky and a community made mod restores a lot content that was cut before shipping-the game wasn’t properly finished).

Best Story: Fallout New Vegas - It’s the setting that makes the story here, and all the moving pieces and factions alongside the main conflict really make this game stand out. There’s so many little pieces to find along the way in the world and the way the main quest splits based on who you want in power feels important--and you are choosing a future for this whole region.

Favorite Art Style: The Witness - This game is peacefully wonderful with its visuals. There are wonderful nature scenes and nests of wires and panels spreading in various parts of the island that are fascinating to look at. The environment is half of the gameplay in most areas, so it’s important to look around even though exploration is not really the gameplay. You find puzzles in the world, even in nature, and it’s fascinating. The colors are bright and beautiful. There is even a map in the middle of the island inside of a lake that helps you track your progress if you notice it (it isn’t like a normal ‘map’).

Favorite Soundtrack: Shin Megami Tensei IV - I love video game soundtracks, but SMTIV is something special. The music booms in ways that make you really understand the atmosphere of the world, and there’s a great mix of different kinds of tracks for different places. I love the tracks for the other worlds you enter, and the themes of the different routes are done so well. Some of the music draws from past SMT games, but the remixes done for this game really are stunning to me, and there’s so many fantastic original tracks.

Hardest Game: I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream - I love this game but I literally never touch it without a walkthrough, which is why it gets to be the hardest game on the list, despite being a point and click adventure game lol. Also just emotionally this game is challenging too, but I definitely mean this more in terms of getting a ‘perfect run’.

Funniest Game: The Stanley Parable - Trying to make this list has taught me that I don’t really play many ‘funny games’. I don’t know if a game where multiple endings demand that you kill yourself should count as a ‘funniest game’, but it is also a game where the narrator tells you to stare at a fern and memorize its features, so....it counts.

Game I Like that is Hated: RWBY Grimm Eclipse - I’ve been playing this game since it was in early access and have loved it the whole time. I find the gameplay soothing and fun, and I like playing the different characters. It’s a game I play to chill out and just enjoy some fun battle mechanics. It’s a fun game and I’ve spent over 100 hours in it, so I hope I like it, lol.

Game I Hate that is Liked: Nier Automata - Neither this game’s gameplay or story impress me, and the fact that you have to replay basically the same stuff from a more boring-to-play-character’s pov in order to SEE all of the plot is a huge damper on the experience. The story, to me, someone who engages with a lot of robot-focused fiction, is far from impressive or new, and it hardly engages with genre specifics at all, let alone in a new or interesting way. I view this game as ‘a story with robots in it’ rather than ‘a story about robots’, which, to me, is a detriment.

Underrated: Nevermind - This game is amazing and very unheard of--and when it is heard of, it has been marketed incorrectly. Nevermind seems like a horror game, and does market itself as one a bit, but it’s much more than that. It’s more about trauma, recovery, therapy, etc. This is a game that is so mindful about the topics it engages in that I am impressed by it every time. It’s heavy with symbolism and character, despite lacking conversations or other similar game mechanics. This is a lovely game that I really wish more people knew about-`p5-all of the patients are so interesting, and the focus on recovery and mental health is impressive.

Overrated: Fire Emblem - I sort of mean this as the series as a whole really. I have enjoyed the entries I have played somewhat, but I overall consider the series much less impressive than I was led to believe by others. The gameplay especially is not impressive to me in any regard, even though I sometimes do find myself enjoying it. The stories are alright, but many of them are weighed down by the gameplay and as a writer and person who likes to analyze writing, it’s very hard to do so when it isn’t able to fully exist under the chains the gameplay forces on it. There are ways to mix gameplay and story well, Fire Emblem has not really done that in any of the entries I’ve played. That being said, I don’t regret playing them, and I will occasionally replay, but I consider them mediocre games at best.

Best Voice Acting: Devil Survivor 2 - I love the voice acting in this game. I feel like all the characters are really suited to their voices, and it’s really easy for me to visualize their voices. They really bring the game to life and make both the dramatic and the funny scenes more enjoyable.

Worst Voice Acting: Jedi Knight Jedi Academy - I love this game, I really do, but some of the voice acting is janky. Some of it is okay too--I think Kyle Katarn’s voice actor does fine, and some of the others I like NOW but hated when I was a kid, but the male protagonist voice in this game is just awful. Which is bad when Jennifer Hale is the female voice actress lol. His performance is passable though unless you’re playing darksided--the darksided ending to the game lacks all punch when you’re playing the male protagonist.

Favorite Male: Battler Ushiromiya from Umineko no Naku Koro Ni - He’s the protagonist for most of the visual novels and I adore him utterly, especially once you move past episode 2. He’s a wonderful character who I care about deeply. I love his drive and how he fights--he’s someone who is easy to cheer for. He matures well throughout the series and his character development is just wonderful.

Favorite Female: Naoto Shirogane from Persona 4 - I really like how Naoto fits so well in the game, especially for being a final recruit--oftentimes the final recruit of Persona games (post 3) have a bit of a more difficult time feeling right with the group. Naoto works really well though, and I love her struggles and story as well. I think the difficulties she has concerning living as a woman in her field hit very deep to a problem that has existed for a very long time.

Favorite Protagonist: Connor of Daventry from King’s Quest 8 Mask of Eternity - I’m like, one of four fans of this character in the world, lol. KQ8 is not a very well liked game and it does have a lot of issues, both with age and with how much of a departure it is from the series prior to it. It’s strange to take a puzzle adventure game and make it a hybrid with what basically is a shooter, and it doesn’t really work. Add to that the fact that you spend most of your time in the game without anyone around to talk to and it leads to this really polarizing and weird experience. For me, Conner goes through what I would consider to be the ‘Ultimate Nightmare Scenario”. Everyone in the world is turned to stone except him (and he survived out of mere chance) and so now it’s up to him, practically alone, to save the entire world. There is no game lonelier than this. I adore him for his bravery in the face of it, and how he just picks up to do what must be done because someone should do it, and if no one else can, then he will. I also really love how he apologizes to people who are encased in stone while he takes money from their houses to help him on his journey. I really do think he went back after the game was over and gave everyone heaps of gold to pay them back with interest lol.

Favorite Village: Oakvale from Fable - The first Fable is the only one I really like, and it was one of the games I played when I was little, so the hometown in the game always meant a lot to me. I like how you grow up there and how your tragic backstory is there--and then how you get to return to the town years later after you’ve come into your own, and you can see it completely rebuilt. I like to spend a lot of my time in this town, just wandering around it and playing the minigames. Even though I have a house in every town, Oakvale is where my hero calls home.

Most Hated Character: Merril from Dragon Age 2 - I don’t really want to lay into how I feel about Merril, but what I will say is that it was suggested to me that I totally ignore her when playing, and I did so. I only met her for her quest, dropped her off in town, and literally never spoke to her or interacted for the rest of the game. I had a much better experience for it, honestly. She appeared after I made my choice in the end of the game, which felt weird since I hadn’t spoken to her in several ingame years, but other than that, the game was totally fine without her. I sort of just wish you could kill characters in DA2 the way you can in DAO, then I’d just do that, tbh. It doesn’t suit very many (or any) of the characters I rp in DA2 to keep her around or support her in any way.

First Game I Played: Mixed up Mother Goose Deluxe - I’m not actually sure if this is the FIRST game I’ve ever played or not, but it’s one of the first I played alone as a kid. I really loved it--this is probably what created my love for point and click adventures, and the game was very silly and fun.

Favorite Company: Bioware - I’ve always been a sucker for Bioware games, ever since Knights of the Old Republic 1 was my favorite childhood game. I love how they do stories and party members, and while I’m not a fan of all of their games, I really love what they’ve made and their style of storytelling and character driven plot. Even though sometimes their stories get cliche, I think the suit video games well and most of my early gaming was within their games.

Hated Company: EA - Bioware truly only started to go to shit after the EA acquisition, so I fucking hate EA. I know Bioware had issues before EA too, but I definitely don’t think EA has helped the situation whatsoever.

Depressing Game: The Beginner’s Guide - I relate to this game as a creator and a writer, and it affects me deeply because of the story it tells and the questions it raises. It makes me reflect on how I think of myself as a creator, and it reminds me of friendships I used to have.

Creepy Game: The Path - God, I love this game. It’s just aimlessly wandering around and finding symbolic scenery and watching your current character comment on it. Then, you go off to find your girl’s wolf, and each one is different and unique to her, and you watch it ‘kill’ her--and facing her wolf is the only way each girl can truly mature. Whenever you get to grandmother’s house, the camera switches to first person, and your eyes keep closing, so you can only see while clicking to move. It forces you to keep moving so that you can see, but since you are moving, you only get to see things somewhat vaguely. It’s got a great atmosphere, and I love the symbolic storytelling.

Happy Game: Eastshade - This game is so sweet. There’s some drama around to with many of the quests, but I like this as an rpg without combat, and I think this would be a really good kids game. There’s a lot to see and explore, and the game was made to be really pretty so that you want to paint several aspects of it. It’s really lovely to just wander around in this game and bike around the area, painting anything that suits your fancy. As long as you don’t finish the main quest, you’re free to wander, and materials do respawn, so you essentially can infinitely paint once you get far enough.

Favorite Ending: Virtue’s Last Reward - I love the questions this game asks and where the ending goes. It thematically ties together--the whole reason the game itself exists is to get the attention of a ‘higher being’--the player, essentially. I love how it plays with that concept, and even though the final game in the series doesn’t entirely pick this idea up where this game left it, standalone this game is stunning in how it comes together.

#shitpost #long post #this was fun to do #i made it so every answer was a different video game and i tried to mix up my companies as well #got 3 atlus games on here but mer #2 obsidon #llol #2 sierra too haha but still #beginner's guide and tsp were made by the same guy too but #STILL I LIMITED MYSELF OK #these answers aren't absolute because i was trying to have a good diverse list lol

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dourpeep · 3 years

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i think ill wait for her banner to drop and test out her character first, if i like her style then ill pull and vice versa. you have a twin??? :0 idk why but i find that very fascinating lol.

also uh tw/kaeluc just in case anybody wants to scroll past cause yuck

i just saw a post abt kaeluc and its like so....eugh and ew. why why why would you ever ship two brothers? i genuinely do not see the attraction of the ship? like yea enemies to lovers ig? but theres tons of enemies to lovers pairs out there that you can do just why the brothers good lord. also again sorry if this is bothering you but i just needed to get this out cause ive been trying to fall asleep and forget but its been 30 mins and its not working

OH NO we're 2 years apart but we might as well be twins ifheihf ...it's scary sometimes and we also look really similar (and though siblings look the similar, people often mistake us for each other even when face to face)

scary....

SO TO JOKE AROUND it's been a long ongoing thing between friends and family that we're twins. It's even funnier because we picked different travelers (I chose Aether, they chose Lumine) so we also mess around during co-op like "sISTER I FOUND YOU"

and ahhh yeah, as icky as it is, it's best to just avoid it since people will always do stuff like that (as cynical as it sounds). It's dubious, but you can't make a ton of content disappear (and even if you could it'd come back tenfold)

Oh? If it's bedtime, please make sure to sleep. Don't follow in my example, for I am horrid when it comes to sleep schedules.

#anon asks #lunachelly

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desterea · 3 years

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i was tagged by @kurapikalesbian go follow her she's one of my favorite mutuals <3

favorite anime: i'd been hyperfixating on hunter x hunter for over two years straight so it's hard not to say that's my favorite but princess tutu also means so much to me, like i understand hxh is not for everybody but i would absolutely recommend princess tutu to all of you. it takes classic magical girl and storybook elements and turns them into a really fascinating metanarrative about fate and happiness.

least favorite anime: god i have so many of these. h*talia. aot. nanatsu no taizai. hanyo no yashahime. all absolute garbage.

last anime i watched: i recently got finished watching samurai flamenco with neff masagotos which was very fun! it's very clearly a love letter to superhero/vigilante stories and it was very interesting trying to pick apart the blurred line between reality and fiction. i would highly recommend it, especially if you're a fan of sentai anime, although tell neff if you're going to watch it because they'd be more than happy to watch it with you

favorite anime movie: howl's moving castle and my neighbor totoro. hmc has my favorite story and characters but mnt was the first anime movie, or the first anime ever i can't remember, i ever watched, plus it's such a chill and relaxing movie.

comfort anime: princess tutu <3

favorite anime character: he's from a manga not an anime but qifrey from witch hat atelier. he might not have a bigger or longer impact on me than other characters but he sure is a fucking witch because he is hexing me something fierce. im so obsessed with his style and his edgy backstory and his dad instincts and every time i think about him i go crazy.

shoujo or shounen: i'm way more familiar with shounen than i am with shoujo just from sheer numbers of anime i've watched between each genre. but i may have to say shoujo because all four that i've seen (as opposed to the twenty odd shounen ive seen) i really liked. i think it might also be that im just straight up bored by pure action/fight scenes that aren't choreographed or animated masterfully.

if i could shift into an anime world, which would it be: probably princess tutu tbh. it's got that extremely fancy art school and half the townspeople are animals for no reason other than a dead author wanting to fuck around and warp reality.

tagging: @masagotos @shriika @mini-and-boop @kulluto @kleia @actuallynimo @brewmasterboggie

#tag games #long post #i love doing tag games honestly since i love talking about myself ;3

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infinitelytheheartexpands · 3 years

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My laptop is currently updating, so while I have that working in the background, I wanted to share a series of six short, mostly-opera-inspired autobiographical narratives/prose poems I wrote last April and May:

I would kill to have some wine right now.

There is a bottle of red wine sitting on the kitchen counter. My father bought it when he went to the store the other day─ don’t ask me what day it was, I don’t remember, the days already blend together as is─ and I have considered pouring even just a little bit into a glass and downing it.

And then proceeding to throw the glass against the wall and shatter it.

I’ve been contemplating doing that a lot lately.

True, I would kill to have some wine, but if I did go ahead and pour even just a little bit into a glass, and down it, and possibly then proceed to throw the glass against the wall and shatter it, I would most likely be killed before I had the chance to kill.

Kill or be killed. We are all trying our very best to do neither these days, but it happens anyway.

I am sixteen years old. As I start writing this, I am nine days away from turning seventeen. For me, alcohol consumption is thus not only not approved by the Parents, but also illegal. But then again, so is voting blue in the 2020 US Presidential election. That is also something neither approved by the Parents nor legal for me. But I digress.

Thirty-one, twenty-nine, thirty-one again, sixteen now, that makes sixty, ninety-one, one hundred and seven days since I watched one of my classmates get drunk at a New Year’s Eve party. She downed a whole bottle of peach wine (I didn’t even know that was a thing) and looked at me with her red eyes and silver-sequined halter top and curly dark brown hair in a high ponytail. You’re more beautiful than Jesus she told me and you’ll go to the moon on a rocketship. I laughed.

I laugh when something’s so unexpected I can’t do anything else. I laughed when I first heard Notre Dame Cathedral had caught fire because it seemed so ludicrous that I couldn’t do anything else. Notre Dame on fire? You can’t be serious, it can’t be serious.

It was serious.

I’m not sure if she was.

A little part of me wishes she were.

When I was in sixth grade, I told the same girl I thought her hair was luscious. Sixth-grade me didn’t know the word had a sexual connotation; the girl did and was offended.

Maybe a little part of me did know, somehow.

***

As I write this next part, I am working on a paper about state-sponsored censorship. I have picked this topic because it is a fascinating topic, it fits the requirements for the paper─ write about a major global problem─, and because I feel censored myself.

Expressing anything that conflicts with the Parents’ thoughts and opinions is strictly forbidden. If you are different, you are ostracized. I am different, so I am ostracized.

I am too proud, too strong to succumb. But it still hurts.

As I write this, I am listening to Act IV of Rossini’s Guillaume Tell, an opera about liberation, appropriate for both me and my paper. At this moment, Hedwige is calling on God, ‘the hope of the hopeless’, to save her husband and break the yoke of oppression that binds Switzerland.

It’s very nice, and the sentiment is good and true, and it works for her and Mathilde and Jemmy and the Swiss women, but it does not work for me. I lost my faith a long time ago. Ironically, it is French grand opéra, the genre to which Guillaume Tell belongs, that is partially responsible for my loss of faith.

It was impossible for me to watch Verdi’s Don Carlos for the first time in eighth grade and Meyerbeer’s Les Huguenots in tenth and not be horrified by the things people do in the name of religion, to kill people senselessly just because they believe slightly differently than them─ even their own daughters (as is the finale of Les Huguenots).

How can a good God allow such things?

Do I realize these works are fictional? Yes. But do I know they are based on history, on real events? Yes.

“These things are meant to happen; they are all in God’s plan.” Well, can God just not find another way to make what’s meant to happen happen? I cannot believe in a God that allows these things to happen. To say that an all-powerful, all-knowing, all-good God who can allow such things exists is a lie.

***

Now that Guillaume Tell is over, I am listening to another grand opéra, Les vepres siciliennes, albeit in its Italian version, I vespri siciliani. Another opera about occupation and liberation, but a liberation that comes at a horrible cost: the entire French ruling class is massacred by the Sicilians at the end of the opera.

If I didn’t care, I would stage my own personal ‘massacre’: I would turn my back, walk out the front door with the possessions I most needed to survive on my own, and never come back.

But I do care. They may not care, but I do.

One of my greatest curses is that I care about what I care about too much. My heart is too deep to not care.

There are some battles that are not worth being fought.

If a massacre is your only recourse to accomplish something, perhaps you should not do that thing. Or, at least try to find another way.

Right now, I am at the beginning of Act III, at Monforte’s aria “In braccio alle dovizie”. In the original French, it’s called “Au sein de la puissance”. At the breast of power.

Monforte is the hated French governor of Sicily, the revolutionaries’ primary target. When he sings this, he has just learned that one of the main revolutionaries, Arrigo, is his long-lost illegitimate son.

By rape.

‘The breast of power’ indeed.

Just like with a massacre, if rape is your only recourse to accomplish something, perhaps you should not do that thing either.

Just a thought.

I’m a woman. What do I know, in the eyes of many out there?

One of my friends said that Verdi gave Monforte his just deserts, but also overly beautiful music. “He couldn’t help it, though, not when his Dad Music Instincts were activated.”

I feel guilty listening to the aria, even though it is truly a beautiful piece and the recording I’m listening to─ a 1989 recording from the Teatro alla Scala, with Giorgio Zancanaro as Monforte─ is absolutely gorgeous.

Can we separate the music from the character, the art from the artist? I do not know. Everyone has something utterly heinous to someone else. Once we stop separating the art from the artist, where do we begin again? And yet, I do not want to support people who do horrible things to others.

Perhaps it is all relative.

Perhaps everything is.

Perhaps nothing is absolute at all.

That frightens me.

***

Today is Rome’s 2,773rd birthday. As a six-year Latin student and future classics and history double-major, this is cause for celebration.

If things were normal and I were at school, my Latin teacher would bring birthday cake for all the Latin students, and we’d eat it and sing “Felix dies natalis, Roma”. Happy Birthday, Rome.

But things are not normal, and I’m at home multitasking between this and a presentation script for that paper, and still listening to I vespri siciliani.

Now I’m at the end of Act IV. Everyone is celebrating the impending marriage of Arrigo to Duchess Elena, one of the Sicilian revolutionary leaders. Sicilian and French, united at last. Everything is set to work out.

But there’s still Giovanni da Procida, the other major revolutionary leader, who is hellbent on revenge. He sees this wedding as the perfect opportunity to strike down the French once and for all.

And thus, the massacre.

Everything can be set to work out, but there is always something that comes up. A massacre, a pandemic, a set of internal troubles that bring a proud empire to its ruin.

Now I’m in Act V, at Elena’s bolero ‘Merce, dilette amiche’. She has no idea about Procida’s plans; she’s just excited to marry Arrigo and bring peace to her beloved Sicily at last. I think I’m going to change operas again after this is over; the act is rather uneven (though I still very much like it) and I would prefer not to listen to everything falling apart today.

I debate listening to Berlioz’s Les Troyens, the closest thing to an opera about the founding of Rome and a masterpiece itself. But there is still too much about collateral damage for my tastes today: one kingdom falls and another loses its benevolent queen, all in the name of a supposedly greater destiny. And that’s just based on the first third of the Aeneid. I wrote an essay about that first third once for English class, using that thesis; my English teacher said it was one of the best essays he’d ever read. But I digress.

After a quick refresher on the synopsis, I decide to change styles and go with a story from the heyday of the Roman Empire: Handel’s Agrippina. Lots of plotting, but everyone gets what they want in the end and it ends happily for all. No collateral damage here. I am weary of that.

Sometimes I feel like collateral damage.

It’s tough to remember that you’re the master of your own story, not just a side character or a scapegoat in so many others’.

Everyone in this opera knows they’re the masters. That’s the problem. But it ultimately works out.

I want nothing more than for it to work out for me. It hasn’t yet.

But I have a feeling it will.

***

I got maybe halfway through the first act of Agrippina yesterday. I love Baroque opera, but I guess only in small doses.

No matter.

Today I’m listening to the beginning of Act II of Verdi’s Don Carlo. This is the fourth time in a row I’ve listened to it.

I read John Green’s Turtles All The Way Down recently. The main character frequently finds herself stuck in ‘thought spirals’, where she keeps thinking more and more about the same thing. I have those too, although I tend to picture my mind more as a bullet train: it always moves hundreds of miles an hour, faster than I can control, from one thought to the next. I constantly find myself retracing the figurative map of my mind to figure out what I was thinking about, what I need to remember but simply cannot. And it’s like my mind keeps returning to the same stations a lot; these are my equivalent to the spirals.

This opera, this moment, is one of my frequent stations.

Make that five times in a row now. This will be the last, I promise myself.

In this scene, a group of monks chant, praying for the rest of the dead Emperor Charles V, whom, I note with a smile, was himself a character in one of Verdi’s earliest operas, Ernani. In that opera, he sings an aria where he confronts his destiny as the next Holy Roman Emperor. My legacy will live throughout the ages, he sings.

Including in two different Verdi operas.

But there I go again on another bullet-train route.

The monks are singing now, their stark minor-major shifts making me feel as if I am there, in the cloister of San Yuste or in any of the great cathedrals of Spain, looking up into the vaults of the ceiling, of heaven itself, seemingly. The only lights come from candles in my mental picture, and I gaze up, my head uncovered, my mind only partially spellbound, more by the visual beauty and the history than by any religious feeling.

I am a heathen.

I have only been inside a Catholic church once, when I was fourteen; it was an impromptu side trip during a school-sponsored tour of colleges in St. Louis. One of the chaperones said the Cathedral Basilica had can’t-miss art, and thus managed to get a large section of the attendees to come with her.

She was right. It was one of the most beautiful places I’d ever seen. And that was all I thought.

Okay, that’s a lie. I did wonder what it would be like to be able to have faith again, to be able to kneel in one of the pews, and pray, and believe, as my ancestors have done before me; after all, if religion were something you inherited in your blood, then I would be half-Catholic.

But I cannot kneel and pray and believe.

In this scene, one of the monks claims that Charles V fell because he was too proud, because he believed that he was greater than God. If a god exists, I do not claim to be greater than them. I am not perfect, not by a long shot.

He did not die because he did not believe in God. He died because everyone dies, even those who are supposedly the greatest of us.

God alone is great, the monk proclaims. I do not, cannot believe that. We are all great to begin with, but some of us are led to believe we are not.

We are the masters. I must remember that.

And I realize that I have let it play a sixth time.

Sometimes I am not the master of my own mind.

***

The sixth time was the last.

Now I am at the end of the act, listening to the showdown between Filippo II, King of Spain, and Rodrigo, Marquis di Posa. Filippo is the guardian of the way things are; Verdi called Rodrigo an anachronism, and indeed, he was the only principal character who never existed.

Rodrigo, he said, was at least two centuries ahead of his time.

I don’t know what exactly Verdi’s feelings were about this, but personally, I do not think this is a bad thing. Progressivism is often progressivism in any age.

At any rate, Rodrigo, who has recently returned from Spanish-held Flanders, has taken his chance─ a rare private meeting with the King, who is confused as to why Rodrigo has never approached him for favors like all the other courtiers─ to confront him about the horrific conditions of Flanders and its people. Give them liberty, he pleads.

No. I have given them the same peace I have given Spain.

A horrible peace!, Rodrigo fires back. The peace of the tomb!

We should not have to suffer until death.

Let history not say of you, “He was a Nero.” A murderer of innocents, a torturer of the defenseless, an occupier, a denier of liberty─ perhaps the greatest torture of all.

I once watched a video in which a director said, “To live in an occupied country is to live only half a life.” I would say that to live in an occupied country, or even any place where you cannot be free, cannot live fully as yourself, is not even that. It is to barely live at all. It is to merely have a beating heart and breath.

To live in spite of this, to simply be as you wish, is the ultimate act of defiance.

#notyouraveragejulie writes #(or rather reads old writing)#writing #poetry #poems #prose poems #autobiographical narratives #life in the time of COVID #opera #opera tag #censorship #freedom #also the author would like to note that this was written *before* she saw Agrippina and loved it so those comments aren't 100% accurate now

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rxcusant · 4 years

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im having a big thonk about vanitas, my portrayal of vanitas, so im going to ramble about him. nothing negative i just like talking about him

so like. vanitas isnt shy about calling himself an abomination, to him its as casual as talking about the weather. Its gonna rain today and im an abomination, whats for lunch? its like a matter of fact. then he pops into soras heart and he can only manifest a form like an eldritch abomination and he kinda vibes with it?? hes not particularly bothered since at least he doesnt have soras face and looks like the horror hes always viewed himself as.

but but but then the INTERESTING thing happens! hes freed from soras heart and given a chance at a new life! and, speakingg from a perspective where hes steadily adjusting to life, THATS WHEN BEING AN ABOMINATION ACTUALLY BOTHERS HIM !! he just CANT view himself as anything other than an abomination/monster/creature of the dark. the idea of accepting that he could be human is a strange and unusual concept and has never applied to him before. its like....how do you convince someone that theyre human when all their life theyve never been treated like one.

i just think its neat to see him develop to a point where this mentality hes accepted and embraced has morphed into a complex that hinders even the smallest things like sleeping in a bed. neither me or him couldve predicted this and while im enjoying it vanitas is losing his marbles, or what remained of them. ive written him as this shameless gremlin who enjoyed harming others for so many years that writing him in this scenario where he can be a normal boy has REALLY BEEN SOMETHING

having said that ive been writing him chilling out for awhile now and if he doesnt do something awful in another verse hes gonna scream LMAO

vanitas as a whole is a super interesting character to write-- if you take the novels into account anyway cause the games be like He Will Punch You And Call You Idiot And Leave-- hes a boy whos been through hell and back and been so twisted and warped, its been fascinating to dip into that mindset,pick it apart, and put my own spin on it.

#outofxiii #sammi talks about her portrayal of vanitas asmr LMAO DJHFGK #holds him up I JUST THINK HES NEAT!#he may be a nasty gremlin but hes MY nasty gremlin

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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15 Best SNES RPGs Ever Made

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SNES games might not be much to look at now, but in many ways, they were a massive improvement over any console games that came before. SNES developers could create massive worlds with detailed sprites that actually looked like what they were intended to represent. New advances in technology also meant that games could take their first real steps toward becoming the kinds of cinematic experiences we arguably take for granted today. And while 4 MB wasn’t even a ton of storage even space back then, it was still more than enough to fit an impressive script for a 40-hour story.

In short, the SNES was almost perfectly set up to be the home for RPGs. While the console RPG scene was still finding its footing at the time of the Super Nintendo’s release, many developers were more than willing to dip their toes into the genre to see what kind of experiences they could craft. That combination of experimentation and all-time great creative voices eventually resulted in some of the most beloved role-playing games ever made.

As we celebrate the 30th anniversary of the SNES in North America, now feels like a great time to look back at 15 of the best RPGs on the SNES.

15. Shadowrun

In the early 1990s, console RPGs were synonymous with turn-based combat and medieval settings full of knights, sorcerers, and dragons. So, no one really knew what to make of a cyberpunk game with real-time combat set in a dystopian Seattle. However, those who stuck with Shadowrun found one of the best and grittiest stories of the 16-bit era, as well as some surprisingly innovative conversation and hacking systems.

Shadowrun was truly ahead of its time in almost every way. While it didn’t get that much attention when it was released, games like Cyberpunk 2077 and The Ascent proudly carry on its legacy to this day. Even the Shadowrun franchise itself finally got its due with a trilogy of successful PC RPGs released over the last decade.

14. Soul Blazer

Even today, Soul Blazer is a title that not many gamers have heard of. Admittedly, it’s a little rough around the edges. Arriving early in the lifecycle of the SNES, the graphics and music aren’t quite up to par with the best games of its era, but the gameplay makes it a worthy addition to this list. Taking some inspiration from Actraiser, another beloved Quintet game, your goal in this action RPG is to clear out various lairs, rescue various souls (that could take the form of plants, animals, or other humans), and free the land from the evil Deathtoll.

Quintet would go on to hone Soul Blazer‘s best ideas in several other games (including Terranigma, another fantastic action RPG that sadly never made its way to North America). Unfortunately, Quintet shut down in the mid-2000s, and it’s unclear who exactly owns the rights to these games at this point. That sadly makes any official re-releases of these often-overlooked gems unlikely.

13. The 7th Saga

The 7th Saga is an excellent example of a game that had a lot of great ideas that never quite came together. Probably the best thing about the game is the playable characters. You have seven to choose from at the start (including a robot and an alien), and you eventually meet six other characters that you can either fight or recruit. It was also one of the first RPGs that didn’t include completely random combat. Enemies could actually be avoided through an innovative “radar” system.

Unfortunately, The 7th Saga is also unforgivingly difficult, with some enemies always surpassing your stats no matter how much you level up. So, while it may not have aged as gracefully as other games on this list, it’s an utterly fascinating project with incredible ideas that have since been incorporated into numerous genre classics.

12. Breath of Fire II

To be honest, Breath of Fire II doesn’t have a particularly memorable stand-out feature. Sure, there’s a town-building feature that lets you fill a town with various NPCs you meet throughout the game, but it’s easily ignored. Having a giant talking armadillo in your party is also pretty cool, but it’s obviously hard to recommend the game based on that alone.

So why should you play Breath of Fire II? Well, it’s just a very solidly told fantasy story with a lengthy quest and strong turn-based combat. It’s nothing flashy, but it’s a strong overall entry into the Super Nintendo’s RPG library.

11. Lufia II: Rise of the Sinistrals

The release of Lufia II was overshadowed by the release of the next-gen systems and a SNES library already bursting with classic RPGs. It took a while for a lot of gamers to dig up this hidden gem, and some gamers simply never found it at all. To be fair, the story (which features a typical fantasy hero who has to save the world from the four evil Sinistrals) is a little mechanical, but Lufia II features some of the best graphics and music of any game on the console. Plus, there are tons of puzzles to solve and a 99-level randomized dungeon to eventually tackle. Honestly, Lufia II might feature more “gameplay” than any other Super Nintendo RPG.

While it’s billed as a sequel, Rise of the Sinistrals is actually a prequel to the first game, so you can feel free to dive right into it without playing through the first (though Lufia and the Fortress of Doom is well worth checking out as well).

10. Harvest Moon

Arriving at the tail end of the SNES’ lifespan, Harvest Moon made a lot of gamers re-examine what an RPG could actually be. There’s no combat and no great quest to save the world. You’re just a simple farmer growing crops and raising livestock on the land you inherited from your grandfather. It sounds boring, but the gameplay loop is remarkably addictive. There’s a reason why the Harvest Moon series continues to this day and has inspired dozens of imitators, spin-offs, and sequels (most notably Stardew Valley).

Admittedly, some of the recent Harvest Moon games haven’t lived up to the series’ standards, but thanks to charming characters, witty writing, and its simple yet deep gameplay, there’s a very good argument that this first Harvest Moon game remains the best in the franchise.

9. Illusion of Gaia

The spiritual sequel to Soul Blazer exchanged the town-building mechanics of its predecessor for more involved combat, which honestly made it a better game overall. Illusion of Gaia also forgoes the traditional leveling of most RPGs for a roguelike system where protagonist Will can choose to increase his attack, defense, or health stats after clearing each room of enemies. As such, how you choose to proceed can make the final bosses of each dungeon significantly easier or much more difficult.

While it’s not technically set in the real world, Illusion of Gaia does incorporate several real-life locations, such as Egyptian pyramids, Incan ruins, and the Great Wall of China, leading to some of the most unique locales in any SNES RPG. It’s also a much better-looking game than Soul Blazer, fixing one of its predecessor’s biggest flaws.

8. Secret of Evermore

Square Enix (then Squaresoft) is primarily a Japanese developer, but after the massive success of multiple titles in the ‘90s, they decided to give an American studio a crack at the Square formula. While the basic gameplay of Secret of Evermore is obviously inspired by the superior Secret of Mana, Evermore mixes things up by restricting combat to just you and your trusty dog. There’s also a new alchemy mechanic that allows you to create potions when battling the game’s many tough bosses.

For better or worse, Evermore is also graphically a much darker game than other Square titles of the era. It all mostly works here, but Square was ultimately not interested in pursuing Americanized versions of its games and Evermore is now more of a curiosity than anything else.

Games

25 Best SNES Games of All Time

By Chris Freiberg

Games

25 Best RPGs Ever Made

By Matthew Byrd

7. Ogre Battle: The March of the Black Queen

More of a military strategy sim than a typical RPG, The March of the Black Queen might be the most demanding game on the SNES. You will spend a lot of time managing units, some of which include ninjas, griffins, and witches. But when you pick just the right strategy, it’s oh so rewarding to watch them take back the continent of Zetegenia from the evil Empress Endora. It also features one of the denser stories of any 16-bit game. Many of the best plot beats may even remind you more of Game of Thrones than Lord of the Rings.

This is actually considered the fifth episode of the Ogre Battle saga, and while several sequels were produced over the years, the first four games that would have presumably featured the rise of Endora were never made. Sadly, though, Square Enix now owns the property, it doesn’t look like the Ogre Battle saga will ever be completed either.

6. Final Fantasy IV

Plenty of RPGs were released before Final Fantasy IV (also known as Final Fantasy II in North America at the time of its release), but this was the true turning point for the JRPG genre. Of course, the graphics and sound were better with the move to more powerful hardware, but what really set it apart was the distinction of being one of the first RPGs to actually feature a fully fleshed-out plot complete with a complicated love triangle and a sympathetic villain in Golbez. It was also the first Square game to include the Active Time Battle system, which showed that JRPGs didn’t have to just be plodding turn-based affairs.

Honestly, the only downside of playing Final Fantasy IV on the SNES is that the original English translation is a little iffy. That’s been fixed in later ports and remakes, so while it might not be worth checking out on the SNES anymore over other options, it’s still worth playing in some form.

5. Super Mario RPG

Both Nintendo and Square were arguably at the height of their abilities in the mid-90s, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that when they finally teamed up, the result was an absolute masterpiece. Super Mario RPG expertly combined the beloved Mushroom Kingdom setting and Mario platforming with Square’s top-tier storytelling abilities and advanced RPG combat systems for a truly epic game.

Those who have played through Super Mario RPG still yearn for a true sequel developed by Square or, at the very least, the addition of Geno to Super Smash Bros. Given how beloved the game is, it’s surprising that Square and Nintendo still haven’t teamed up for another RPG. The Paper Mario and Mario and Luigi games are good, but none have surpassed this classic.

4. Secret of Mana

Closer to The Legend of Zelda than Final Fantasy in gameplay, Secret of Mana was perhaps the most innovative RPG of the ‘90s. It introduced many gamers to faster, varied combat, three-player multiplayer, and an absolutely massive game world. Even better, it’s all wrapped up with some of the best music and graphics of the generation. While still confined to the 2D limitations of the SNES, Secret of Mana’s systems are closer to what we see today in modern RPGs and action games than anything that came before.

While this game has been ported and remade perhaps more than any other game on this list, none of those versions quite match the first release. The original version of Secret of Mana still looks and feels timeless.

3. Earthbound

RPGs were generally considered more niche games in the ‘90s. They rarely sold well, but at least did well critically. Earthbound is even more unusual because the initial reviews were rather tepid, yet it’s now considered one of the greatest games of all time. Most gamers just weren’t ready for an RPG set in the modern world that alternated between the cheery enthusiasm of childhood and the ominous alienation of growing up. In that way, Earthbound could be considered a PG-rated South Park that debuted two years before South Park even premiered.

Surreal, satirical, and sometimes just plain weird, Earthbound remains one of the more unique and innovative RPGs ever made. It’s a triumph of the genre that dozens of other games have attempted to emulate, but none have yet surpassed. Now, if Nintendo would just get around to finally putting out an official English localization of the sequel…

2. Final Fantasy VI

Two decades and nine sequels later, there are still some RPG fans who consider Final Fantasy VI to be the pinnacle of the series. That’s debatable, but it’s easily the best of the 2D entries as well as a kind of swan song to the gameplay that introduced many gamers to RPGs for the first time, with its pitch-perfect ATB battles, a huge, varied world to explore, and an epic, apocalyptic story.

But it’s the cinematic aspects that make Final Fantasy VI stand out. The rousing soundtrack pushes the SNES to its absolute limits, making moments like the famous opera scene and the final battle against Kefka feel especially epic. Square arguably came to rely on CG movies a little too much in later games, but Final Fantasy VI is proof that the developers were master storytellers long before that.

1. Chrono Trigger

Is there really anything to dislike about Chrono Trigger? The time-traveling story that sees our heroes journey across millennia to save the world is simply outstanding. The characters, from Frog to Magus, are among the most memorable in any RPG. While the combat system might be a little simpler than some of the games on this list, letting party members team up to use their “Tech” abilities in different ways is endlessly customizable and entertaining. Of course, all of that occurs before you even dig into the new game plus and dozen different endings.

It’s difficult to label any video game as truly perfect, but Chrono Trigger may be the closest thing to perfection that gaming has ever seen. More than two decades on, it remains a high point in the RPG genre that all gamers need to experience at least once, and it’s easily the very best RPG on the SNES.

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forever-rogue · 7 years

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Words and Paper - Part II

Summary: Y/N is a brilliant young lawyer who was hired by Tony Stark himself. She didn’t expect half of the things that would happened, but she was sure glad Bucky happened.

A/N: Hey guys! Thank you all so much for all the kind words and response! You don’t even know how much it all means. So here is part 2, and after this, I swear there will be more plot! Also, please let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist!

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: None

MASTERLIST

“And that should be that,” Y/N huffed and threw the last sweater she had found lingering in the back of her closer over her shoulder. She heard a muffled scoff and turned around to see Bucky standing behind her, sweater on top of his head, “oops.”

“Are you sure this is everything,” he rolled his bright blue eyes at her and balled up the sweater and thrust it into her arms.

“Yes-”

“Because you’ve said that at least 10 times,” he glowered down at her and wondered how one person could have so much stuff. They had already packed up tons and tons of boxes in the last several days.

“I promise, this is the last thing Buckaroo,” she smiled at him and he sighed at the nickname she had already given him. It had only taken a few days to earn it, but she thought it was cute and suited him. Bucky may have acted liked it annoyed him, but deep down he knew he was lying to himself. He was fascinated by her, from the way she pinned her long wavy locks, to the flowery dresses she wore, to her ‘take no shit’ attitude. She might be working and living in a man’s world, but she held her own.

“You have way too much stu-”

“Shhhh,” she leaned up and pressed her finger to his lips, “I like things, but I swear they all have a use.”

“Whatever you say, Princess. But let me just say, you have no need for a wardrobe of that size,” he laughed lightly at her. She seemed to have an affinity for things that were soft colors and fluffy, which led to him deeming her a “little princess.” She didn’t mind, she always joked that she was one.

“You don’t know my life. I need all those of those clothes!”

“Guys, are you ready yet? They’re getting a little impatient,” Steve stepped in and interrupted their conversation. Much to his chagrin, he was the one doing all the heavy lifting and in charge of bring the furniture to the moving truck.

He knew Bucky more than capable of helping him, and at first he was annoyed that he was stuck doing it all, but he quickly realized why. He happy to his best friend finally crack a few smiles as he got to know the newest member of the team. It had been so long since he’d seen him that happy, so he stepped back and let them do their own thing, observing as Bucky meticulously watched her every move.

“Yeah,” she said softly, a tone of sadness clouded her voice, “I think it’s just missing us, this sweater and Pickles.” Y/N put her sweater and picked up her small black cat, waiting near the door, as if she was knew what was coming.

“I’ll meet you guys down there, I’ll get an Uber ready to take us to the airport,” Steve nodded and started heading out, phone in hand.

“Come on then, little lady,” Y/N sighed and put Pickles in her carrier, after subjecting her to a few kisses. She went to reach for her sweater but Bucky beat her to it.

“Don’t worry, I got this. Are you sure you’re ready?” He looked down at her and saw that her eyes were glassy with tears threatening to spill over.

“Yeah, ready as I’ll ever be,” her voice was a bit of a strangled sob. She was sad to leave the city she had known her whole life, but nothing there was truly holding her back; her family was gone, and she had relatively few friends. She was ready for a change and knew this would be an amazing opportunity.

Bucky headed towards the door of her small apartment and opened it slowly, “come on, Princess. Bigger and better things lie ahead.”

“You’re right, Buck,” she said softly, “besides I can always come back. This will always be home.” She flicked the lights off one last time and softly closed the door behind them. Bucky was waiting for her at the end of the hall and held his arm out to her.

“Hey, you’re going to be just fine,” he said as he gave her a quick hug. It was so out of character for him, and he was slightly glad no one else had seen him do it, but in that moment it had felt right.

“Can I ask you something?” Bucky nudged Y/N’s arm gently. She was struggling to stay awake on their flight to New York. Tony had gone all out and had let them use one of the private planes, and they were traveling comfortably. She had her knees tucked into her chest and was all curled up in a big fuzzy blanket next to Bucky. He enjoyed her being so comfortable around him, it made him feel so much more human. And he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy her being so close. As she dozed off and came to she would rest her head on his shoulder.

“Wassup, Buck,” she said sleepily as she yawned and rubbed her eyes. She was suddenly hyper aware of the closeness of their bodies. She could feel the heat radiating off of him.

“Why did you become a lawyer?” Even after reading the file on her, she seemed so interesting, there was just something about her that struck a chord with him.

“That’s a pretty loaded question,” she looked up and smiled lightly, “especially for someone who just woke up.”

“I’ve got all the time in the world,” he responded, his blue eyes lighting up.

“Alrighty then, Buckaroo. How about this,” she leaned up in her seat and leaned in closer to him, “I’ll tell you one thing about me, like wanting to become a lawyer, a day, if you’ll do the same.”

“You want to know things about me?” Bucky was taken aback, no one usually asked about him, besides his extremely small circle of friends. It was a welcome change of pace; one of the things that made him feel like a normal person, not some monster that Hydra had created.

“Yes, James Buchanan Barnes, I do.”

“I’m not very interesting,”

“Sure you are! Everyone is, in their own ways, even if they don’t realize it. The little things you don’t think are interesting or take for granted could be fascinating to other people,” Y/N shrugged her shoulders and looked over at Bucky, “you don’t have to if you want to.”

“You’ve got yourself a deal,” he somewhat reluctantly agreed. He doubted he would bring anything interesting to the table, but he wanted to know more about her. Plus, he could always make up random things to keep it interesting.

“Yes!” She pumped her fist up and down in excitement.

“But, you’re going first,” his lips formed a small smirk.

“I became a lawyer to help people,” she stated simply, and started curling up in her blanket again.

“What! You’re just going to leave it at that?”

“Ooohh, you want a full explanation?” she joked, “I had a lot growing, good family, good schooling, you know - that whole jazz. But I saw so many people who had opposite lives, and it made me sad. Getting older, I started recognizing that these issues were due to a lot of factors. And then, when I turned 12 I decided to become a lawyer to help people in that way.”

‘Wait, you were 12 when you decided to do this?!” He couldn’t keep back a laugh.

“Yes, is it that weird!?”

“A little bit! What other 12-year-olds are thinking about becoming lawyers?”

“I mean, I guess so,” she started laughing too. She could feel his laugh vibrating in his chest, as he tried to control himself, “but you know, it got me to where I’m at now. And I enjoy working in Civil Rights.”

“It’s very impressive,” he agreed, “especially being so young.”

“Right, old man? I like to think so too,” Y/N stuck her tongue out at him, “your turn.”

“Go for it,”

“What’s your favorite color?”

“My favorite color? That’s what you’re choosing to ask?” He squinted his eyes in suspicion.

“Like you said, I’ve got all the time in the world,” she mocked him.

“Touché,” he nodded, “it’s red.”

“Interesting,”

“How is that interesting-”

“If you two are done,” Steve interrupted them their conversation. They both jumped a little, almost forgetting he was there with them, “you’ll notice we’re starting our descent.”

“Welcome to New York, Y/N,” Bucky looked fondly over at Y/N, who had her face glued to the window, observing the nighttime skyline. She looked like an excited child, and was buzzing with joy.

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