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#my mom was appalled at the amount of... questionable friends i have these days and this came to me
loud-whistling-yes · 1 year
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I get a lot of "omg you're so nice and non-judgemental you're such a good friend" and "omg dude you're way too nice to this asshole they should not be your friend" from irl friends and family and I don't know how to say this but uh, if you had friends like I had when I was a preteen you learn to count your blessings real fucking quickly and stop being choosy on who you befriend. The bar is six feet under by now if they don't encourage the entire class to boycott me it's a win.
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thewickerking · 3 months
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sorry for the essay in your asks I’m just studying child development/psych and I Have Thoughts
nonono ur so fine! i enjoy conversing abt it :] im a psych major so were in similar boats! i keep being disappointed in my fellow students ways of talking about children, especially in childhood development focused classes, and there was a particular instance i will never forget of describing a a case study of a young child who was being violent to others, and the first and only question another student asked being "is this disorder often found in serial killers? cause this sounds like what ive heard abt serial killers" and my jaw fucking dropped. I was wearing a mask so no one really noticed but MY first reaction to the case study was "hey a lot of these behaviors were present in MY BROTHER and while he's doing a lot better i wonder if there's anything i can learn from this study that might help him" and we didn't get even close to that. i didn't need psych classes to be appalled at the way adults think of and treat children, but it was certainly not fun. these things are also deeply personal to me because of my own violent behavior as a child due to an amount of trauma that would easily quadruple the length of this post. luckily for me, my mother had similar experiences and reactions to them, and was able to meet me where I was at and found outlets for energy and stress even before she knew about all of the things that were happening to me. getting into martial arts (and later therapy) was not a cure all but was incredibly effective in stopping me from attacking other children and feel more capable of expressing what i was feeling. I was still a kid so its not like i became perfect lmao but it helped a lot. my mom didn't have the same treatment and to this day will get comments about people who knew her as a child that are "just glad she's not a serial killer" and it very much affects her to this day. i know friends who have been told BY TEACHERS that they seem like they could be a serial killer when they grow up. my uncle, who died by suicide, was the son of a serial killer and his family refused to raise or help him because they were afraid he'd "turn out like his father" of whom he never met due to being born in prison. in turn he was extremely abused by the foster care system and relied on intensely unhealthy coping mechanisms and struggled to raise his children and died as their sole provider and leaving them behind. My brother has also displayed violent behavior and made violent threats to other people and struggled with a lot of things because of that. people frequently express they're glad he's not in prison. i may have clung to specifically the serial killer comments a bit longer than necessary because of personal association, but while it's something i study, it's also deeply close to home, and i know how awful long terms affects can be. while that context is not necessary to know why i care so heavily about this, it does make insensitive off hand comments from my alleged peers cut deep.
SORRY this got tangenty and heavy and complaining abt psych majors is not targeted towards u anon lol its just exhausting to have been around unforgiving teachers and adults and seeing its negative affects on me, my family, and my friends, and then seeing similar mindsets in my generation that claims to want to be better than our predecessors. psych is genuinely interesting to me, and due to my early intervention and good luck with therapists, ive seen what benefits people can glean from experiences with the psychiatric field. unfortunately, ive also seen countless ways its failed countless people, and being able to see the start of harmful thinking in my peers makes it incredibly difficult to be optimistic and also pisses me off lmao. as much as this is my choice of career and it matters to me, there are extremely harmful ideas that make up the foundation of modern (and obviously past) psych and seeing people take this at face value makes me spectacularly miserable. 🫠🫠 but its very nice (and refreshing) to talk to other ppl abt these topics from a shared pov that kids aren't evil. Which sounds so much simpler and more common than it actually is 😮‍💨
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wiypt-writes · 3 years
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Murder, He Wrote
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Part 2 Co-Written with @southerngracela​
Summary: After your ordeal at the hands of Ransom, you’re not sure that things can get any worse. Famous last words….
Warnings: Bad language words. MATURE (NSFW 18+) NON-CON situation, kidnap, violence. DO NOT READ IF ANY OF THOSE TRIGGER… READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!
Pairing: DARK! Ransom Drysdale x Reader
A/N:  So this is Part 2 to our submission for @Jtargaryen18 ‘s Haunted House 2020  Challenge. Once again READ THE WARNINGS!!!! This is a DARK Series… don’t @ us if you can’t follow simple instructions and end up with butt-hurt. And if you’re under 18…get off my blog.
Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and by writing it does NOT mean I agree with or condone the acts contained within. This fiction is classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar reader and any other OCs that may or may not be mentioned. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.
Murder, He Wrote Masterlist // Main Masterlist.
Part 1
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  With his pride wounded, Ransom drank himself to sleep that night, his mind plotting and scheming of more ways to make his point clear. She was his now and nothing was going to change that. He'd decided it might be time to let her in on his secrets and breakfast seemed as good a time as any and, as such, presented her with a plate of bacon and toast along with a cup of coffee to wash it down. He didn't cook, not well anyway, his preference being diner out or order in. He supposed if this was his new normal, he'd have to learn a new skill. He cringed just slightly at the thought of such domesticity. 
When you heard the locks turn, your belly dropped out. You were shocked to see him, afraid of what was coming your way. If the events from the previous night were any indication, you had to steel yourself to once again fight back. Your tired eyes took him in. A plate and mug in his hands, jeans over his long legs, boots on his feet. Broad shoulders covered by a white ribbed long sleeve thermal shirt, eyes cold and distant, arrogant smirk over his lips. A smirk of your own barely parted your lips as you took note of the now pink lines adorning his right cheek, courtesy of your nails biting at his skin in the attack. You turned away from him, your body instinctively curling in on itself, chain stopping you from balling up completely when he approached. Your mouth watered at the smell of the bacon and coffee. You were hungry but your body fought to ignore the pangs, offering him that satisfaction.
 "I'm not hungry," you managed, desperately irritated at how weak you sounded. 
"Starve then," he set the plate and mug on the nightstand at your bedside. He stood rooted there, arms crossed over his chest. 
"People are gonna be looking for me, you know," you point out, sitting up a little more, confidence growing by the second. 
“You don’t think I’ve already thought of that?” His hands moved from across his chest to his hips. 
As you looked at him, that maddening smug look present on his face it suddenly dawned on you that he might have been more calculating than you’d imagined. And then you understood. You figured out what the connection between him and the actor you’d been supposedly meeting was. None. None whatsoever, except that Lucas Lee had been easy, collateral damage. "You set him up," your brow rose and shock filled your voice. "Lucas Lee... You set him up. What the hell did you do?" 
"Sweetheart, the guy's a complete tool, he walked right into it and he'll walk right out. Just a couple of hours of questioning and he'll be let go," Ransom shrugged as if this were nothing. 
"You're disgusting," you seethe. This arrogant asshole used someone just to get to you and he was PROUD of it. You didn't know what you expected, but the notion of the reality was appalling.
"You don't know the half of it," he winked.
"You're never going to get away with this," you managed to threaten. The look in his eyes caught your breath as he leaned in close, hands on the mattress on either side of your hips. 
"I killed Fran, got away with that. I nearly killed Marta, same story," he said, popping a shoulder up. "The point is, Sweetheart, I'm that good, they'll never find you."
"My family, my friends…they'll go to the police. Mick, my boss, he'll want to know where I am after not showing up today. You can't possibly have thought of everything," you shook your head as you wondered just how long he'd been plotting this. You’d only met the asshole a few months ago, interviewed him for a couple of hours max and then released the article days later. How on earth had that transpired into this utter shirt-show? The thoughts were spiraling so fast in your mind, it was dizzying. 
"Your boss got an email this morning saying you no longer wanted to work for him, and as for your family and friends, well let’s just say I know where they are. I know your little sister's routine. I know the time your mom walks your dog, and that she does it alone.” Ransom continued and you felt the cold course through your body “You do as I say, and they're safe. If not, well, I can pick them off, one, by one, without even getting my hands dirty," he pulled back, standing over you. "So many criminal junkies in Boston, Sweetheart. Plenty who will take the fall for a little hit,” and with that he turned on his heel and walked to the door. 
The true reality of your situation set in and you felt sick to your stomach, despite your hunger. You felt clammy and overwhelmingly dizzy. He had you. If he'd gone this far, followed your family, set up a well-known actor, plotted this entire plan down to how to convince Mick you quit, in a scary short amount of time, just to get to you, you were fully trapped. 
"What happens if you lock me down here...and something happens to you?” Worry laced your words. 
He turned over his shoulder, "I don't give a fuck." And he slammed the door, the sound of the locks echoing in your room. 
In a gut reaction you grabbed the plate of food at threw it at the door where it shattered into pieces, the bacon and toast falling to the floor with it. You screamed as you threw it, for if you hadn't you'd have vomited where you led. 
**** Ransom heard the scream and the smash of the plate and paused half way up the stairs. He took a deep breath, contemplating going back down and teaching Y/N some damned manners before he decided to leave it. He’d given her enough to think about for the time being, and besides, he didn’t want to lower himself to delivering another slap to her face like he had done last night. In all honesty, he hadn’t been expecting the site of the bruise on her right cheek to unsettle him as much as it had done. Her pretty face shouldn’t be marked in anyway, and looking at it had simply reminded him how he’d lost control. Of all the things he’d done, he’d never hit a woman before, despite murder and attempted murder. It left a bad taste in his mouth all things considered and a nasty twist in his gut that felt almost like guilt. But it wasn’t guilt, that wasn’t something he did either…no, it was the fact that in all of his actions, even the diabolical ones, he’d remained calm and in control. Until last night. He’d been feral, wild even, and it wasn’t a feeling he relished. But she’d pushed him to it, provoked him. It was her fault, not his.
He shrugged on his coat and grabbed his keys, before he headed out, locking the door and climbing into his black Mercedes SUV. God he missed his beamer, but this was a lot less conspicuous, just as he needed at the moment. He slipped his sunglasses on to shield his eyes against the bright fall sun and set off towards the City.
His mother was already seated and waiting for him when he arrived at the Harbor. He walked over to her table, pulling off his sunglasses and sliding them into the pocket of his camel coat, removing his trademark silk scarf as he went. He handed them off to the help showing him to his seat, asking him to bring him a beer, and sat across from Linda, who was watching him carefully as she lounged back in her seat, properly dressed as ever in a crisp pair of black trousers and a white long sleeved silk blouse. With her legs crossed, she cut quite the imposing figure, but not to him.
Ransom greeted her with a stiff nod and she frowned and gestured to his face.
“What on earth have you done to your cheek?” she questioned, clearly noticing the scratch marks. Ransom hesitated for a second, “Things got a little rough last night, ” he shrugged but his smirk didn't quite reach his eyes. Linda let out a slight groan as she grimaced “Jesus Ransom, I don’t want to know about your sordid little bedroom antics,” she scalded. “Then don’t ask, Mother,” He drawled, not missing a beat.
“Oh believe me, I wish I hadn't.” Linda rolled her eyes.
Ransom looked down at the menu that was on the table in front of him, giving it a cursory glance already knowing what he was ordering, the same as he always did when he was here, before he took a deep breath and raised his eyes to his mother. She wasn’t one for small talk, and neither was he, so he decided to get straight to the point.
“Why are we here?” he demanded “I mean, aside from the obvious guilt driven task of having lunch with your son.” “If you're going to be a spoiled brat why did you even agree to meet me?” Linda shot back and Ransom smirked.
“What was it you always told me mom? No matter how rich you are, never turn down a free meal.”
“Snarky smart ass” Linda retorted and it was his turn to snort as her brow furrowed.
“Now, now Mother. Those frown lines are getting worse” he arched an eyebrow and she glared at him before she sighed.
“I wanted to see how you were, is that so hard to believe.” “In a word, yes.” He shrugged.
“Well, it’s true.” She reached for her glass of wine and took a sip. “I've not seen you since you moved house.”
Ransom rolled his eyes, Jesus he didn’t have time for this shit. He took a deep breath and looked at her as she eyed him expectantly, waiting for his answer “Just fine. I'm enjoying my new place.”
“So, you like it then?” Linda set her glass down and leaned back once more. “I must admit when it came on our books I thought it would suit you.”
“It's different than Kenoak, less modern, but it does the job” he said vaguely and saw her body language stiffen.
“If you don’t like it why did you buy it Ransom?” her tone was exasperated and he had to fight back the grin that was threatening to spread across his face at the fact he was riling her. It was always so damned easy.
“Well, my last place had kinda turned into a bit of a media circus.”
“Yeah, I expect that’s what happens when you're involved in a homicide” she snapped back.
“Say it a bit louder.” Ransom deadpanned “I don’t think they heard you over by the bar.”
“Believe me, that wasn’t intentional.” she held his gaze “Your Granddad’s death isn't something I find funny, Ransom. Not that it ever occurred to you."
Ransom sighed. He was starting to get annoyed under her scrutiny and really wasn’t in the mood for a deep dive into the events of the past year.
“Not of sound mind, Mother.” He said, his voice a little softer as he reminded her of the argument his brief had made which had ensured his acquittal from his crimes, hoping it would shut her up. “Remember?”
“I know son, I know.” Linda leaned over and gently lay her hand on his where it rested on the table. Ransom took a deep breath and shifted in his seat. Physical affection from her always made him uncomfortable as he wasn’t used to it, but for some reason it was heightened in that moment. He sat and pondered for a second on what he had just said. His brief had spun the line about him being under emotional duress due to his granddad cutting him out of his will and whilst there was an element of truth in it, he’d been of perfect mental capacity when he’d enacted his plan. But, if it helped his mother believe that her only son isn’t a monster then…whatever. He pulled his hand back from her and she sighed, clearly mistaking his discomfort for guilt.
 “You know, you used to be such an affectionate little boy, Ransom.” Linda looked at her hand as if his rebuttal had burned her before she shook her head and reached once more for her drink. “I often wonder where your dad and I went wrong.”
Ok, so this he could deal with. The reminder that he was a constant disappointment.
 “Hard to say.” He snarked “Somewhere between boarding school and Harvard maybe?”
She rolled her eyes “We did what we thought was best.” She set her now empty glass down. “Clearly in hindsight...”
Ransom was saved from her self-indulgent moment of soul searching by the waiter who set his beer down in front of him and asked if they were ready to order. Ransom gestured to his mother who asked for the house salad with a side of tempura prawns whilst he went for his usual, fillet steak with all the trimmings. It was obnoxiously expensive but what the hell, like he cared. Especially not when his Mother was paying...
He took a long pull from his beer as the waiter topped his mother’s glass up from the bottle that stood in the ice bucket next to their table before she thanked him and he disappeared.
“You’ve not asked me how your father is.” Linda looked at Ransom who narrowed his eyes. Why does she care about that? But, deciding it was as good a conversation change as any he shrugged.
“How's Richard?”
Linda rolled her eyes but for the first time since he arrived he noticed a little smirk flicker on her lips before she looked at him. “He’s still your dad Ransom" she reminded.
“Ok, how is my dearest dad? Still fucking the 30 year old au-pair?”
“Yes, apparently, he's taking her to the villa.”
Now that did make him frown. The Villa that they owned in Lake Gada was his mother’s pride and joy.
“Seriously? You're just gonna let him do that?” Ransom’s tone was surprised.
“I have no choice.” Linda took a deep breath “Our divorce isn't final and he's contesting me keeping the property. It's not as cut and dry as one would assume despite his infidelity, numerous infidelities even.”
“He signed a pre-nup, Mom.” Ransom reminded her and Linda nodded.
“I know, but the Villa wasn't part of it. It's the one thing he can hold over me and he's doing just that.” She took a sip of her drink and snorted “Dumb bastard has nothing so he figures why not try his luck here. Fact is, he gets nothing else.”
“Good.”  Ransom retorted, a little viciously and Linda eyed himself shrewdly.
“Careful Ransom, you almost sound like you care.” She smirked and he rolled his eyes, not gracing her with an answer. “Anyway, what are you doing with yourself these days?” she moved the conversation on “And I don't mean with women as we've already established when you sat down. Any hobbies or God forbid a job prospect I should know about?” “Aside from my love life, I’m actually writing mother, believe it or not.” He responded, amused at the visible look of shock that crossed her face.
“You're....writing?” her mouth dropped open before she hastily shut it.
“Don't sound too surprised, Linda,” Ransom let out a low chuckle as his mother rolled her eyes at his use of her name. “Granddad always said I had a flare for it. Just-” he paused for a moment before he shrugged “-well, I guess I never really used it much.”
Linda cocked her head to the side as she considered him for a moment before her face softened and once more Ransom felt uncomfortable at her change in demeanour. “He'd be proud of you. I suppose it's what he's always wanted for you, to find something for yourself.”
And there it was. The reminder that he was nothing but a trust fund prick, with no future and nothing of his own to live off. He took a deep breath, gritting his teeth slightly before he responded with a false air of nonchalance.
“I see that now.”
“Good. I'm pleased you do Son.” Linda nodded. “I'm not glad about how it all went down but...well, as dad used to say, things have a strange way of working out in the end.” It was a funny choice of words, Ransom thought, but before he had chance to dwell on it anymore their food arrived. The conversation slowed a little as they both ate, growing a little stilted in places as he told her vaguely what his writing project was about- a private detective- go figure. Linda moaned about more about his father, and then she dropped something casually into the conversation that really did surprise him, that they were planning a memorial for Harlan. 
"When?" he frowned, swallowing a mouthful of potato.
“The end of this month, possibly the first week in December. It'll be after Thanksgiving.” Linda waved her hand before she paused, hesitating a little as if she was deliberating whether or not to tell him this next bit. And when she did, he fully realised why. “It was Marta’s idea.” The mere mention of that name was enough to get his hackles up and he took a deep breath, the nerve in his jaw twitching. He looked at his mother as she watched him carefully before he looked away and took a drink of his beer. “Hmmm” was all he could muster.
“Hmmm? What's Hmm, Ransom?” Linda looked at him.
“I figured with Harlan gone she'd be out of our lives.” He shrugged, feeling his neck grow hot. That bitch was responsible for all of this in the first place, the reason he was done out of his inheritance. If she hadn’t got her claws into him none of his would have happened.
“Yes, well, as much as it sticks in my throat that she got everything maybe if we play ball she'll come round to actually giving us all what we're owed.” Linda shrugged “And that aside...it will be nice to remember him.”
The rest of the lunch passed with simple conversation, Ransom steering it well away from the subject of his family. When they’d finished his mother, as predicted, picked up the tab and together they headed outside to wait for the Valet to fetch their vehicles. His mother’s arrived first and she turned to him, the pair of them engaging in the awkward, stilted kissing of the cheeks before she promised him his quarterly check from his shares in her company should land next week. With a nod and a thanks he bid her good bye and a few moments later climbed into his own car and set off back home.
***** With a yell you sat bolt upright, taking a moment to get your bearings as you emerged from the troubled sleep you had fallen back into. Yes, you were still here, in Drysdale’s fucking basement. The tears stung your eyes as you lay back, taking some deep breaths as you attempted to ebb the panic which was setting in. Your situation was disgusting and dire, you were trapped and therefore, you knew you needed to ask for the things you needed, not wanted, just simply needed, or in time, Hugh could add you to his notch post of growing murder victims. The question was, exactly how far could you push him for anything? One wrong move, as you'd learned last night, and you'd be regretting ever uttering a syllable. But you refused to go quietly, you'd be further letting yourself down if you did. You didn't have it in you. However, just how dangerous he was or could be now was no longer lost on you, you had the physical reminder in the biting sting of your cheek, throbbing and tenderness you felt between your legs, and the slight bruising around your wrists where he had pinned them above your head. You hadn’t examined the rest of your body to see what damage he’d done, you didn’t want to.
You ached all over from being led or sat on this damned bed since you’d arrived. The chain attaching you to the bed post wasn’t long enough to allow you to stand up and stretch our your aching limbs so for now you had to settle for attempting to massage some feeling back into your calves, your eyes casting over the various tears and ladders in your thick tights which you’d pulled back up last night with trembling hands after he had violated you.
The door clicked open and your head jerked towards the door as you scrambled higher up the bed, pressing your back into the headboard. You watched as your captor strode in, a packet of Biscoff in his hand pausing as his foot crunched over the shattered remnants of the plate that you’d hurled at the door. He looked up at you, raising an eyebrow, as if he'd forgotten he'd heard you throw it this morning. 
“I don’t like cleaning up messes” He said simply as he stepped over it, shutting the door with his foot.
“Pity you killed the house keeper then” you glared at him as he shoved another cookie into his mouth.
“Who, Fran?” he asked with a scoff, his voice muffled by his food.
“How many other house keepers have you killed?” you shot back and he gave a snort.
“None.” Ransom shrugged nonchalantly “But for your information, Fran was a useless dimwit. She only cared about two things. Drugs and getting paid.”
You frowned, was that supposed to justify his actions in some way? He too only cared about getting paid and what money could do for him. “And you care about what exactly other than yourself?” you shot back. He looked at you, a smirk crossing his handsome face as she shoved yet another cookie into his mouth, chewing slowly.
At that point your stomach growled with hunger, just another way your body had betrayed since you since you had arrived and you tore your face from his, turning it to the side.
“Now are you hungry?” he asked as you realised that was probably the bastard’s plan all along. With a deep sigh you looked back at him.
“Can I have one?” you asked meekly.
Ransom studied you for a moment, tongue poking at his cheek, before he strode towards the bed and offered you the packet. You took one and stuffed it straight into your mouth.
“No thank you?”
“Piss off.” You shot back automatically, swallowing your cookie.
His good demeanour ebbed slightly as an irritated look flashed across his face. “Don’t push me, Sweetheart.” his voice was low as he sank onto the side of the bed, looking at you “I think your situation is precarious enough as it is, don’t you?”
You merely glared at him, you had no comeback. There was no comeback. He was right.
“Now if I make you something proper to eat are you gonna take it or throw it at the door again?” he raised his eyebrows “Because, frankly, you starving yourself is of no real concern to me except I kinda think you’re gonna need to keep your strength up.”
It didn’t take a genius to work out exactly what for. But you were so hungry, and the battle inside you raged on before your self-preservation mode won out and you hung your head slightly, looking at the comforter you were led on. “I’ll eat.”
“See, that wasn’t so hard was it?” Ransom smirked again.
“No.” you replied, your voice devoid of emotion. “Can I have some water too?”
“As long as you don’t throw the glass.”
“I’m thirsty.” You replied simply “I won’t.”
He nodded and stood up, offering you the packet of cookies “Have those for now.”
“Thank you.” You took them from him, your tone a little sarcastic, your eyes rolling as you spoke. He looked at you and for a moment you were worried he was about to do something about your response but he simply gave a huff of laughter and turned to leave.
“I’ll be back shortly.” He said, closing the door behind him. 
You could no longer bite back the sigh of delight as you took another of the buttery spiced cookies into your mouth. It was rich on your tongue but it was food and you were so hungry. What you wouldn't do for a cup of coffee to go with. You surveyed the room as you chewed the Biscoff thoughtfully. The earlier despair you’d felt upon waking just before he had re-appeared was slowly giving way to determination as you realised that for now practicality had to win you over. Not only did you need sustenance and water, which you knew was on the way, you also needed clothing and access to the bathroom, which you now realized you were desperate for.
So now what, you thought to yourself. The fact that he was willing to feed you despite the fact you’d launched your morning’s meal against the door meant he didn't want you dead. Mind you, if he did you wouldn’t have made it out of that fucking dilapidated house so, just what kind of a game was he playing at here? You weren't sure what his end game was if it didn't mean your certain death. You just didn't understand and felt the struggle of thoughts seep into your mind as you contemplated each step. He doesn't want you dead, but you're locked up, chained up and he's obliterated your body by force. And that was only the first round. So far he's voiced his hell bent plan on keeping you here and making you suffer. And he's done a right job at it after just the first night. He couldn't keep this up for the rest of your life, could he? No, you didn't think, but he's gone as far as to know your every day, your family's every day, detail for detail. It couldn't possibly be for ironically a ransom, no, he had plenty of money still and if you were certain, his mother was still finding ways to slip him allowances and he'd managed to get a small chunk under the table and off the record from your publishers on your behalf. So no, it wasn't for money. Did he expect a better and firm, more sincere apology? Well he sure as shit wasn't going to get one now. Stupid, spoiled fuck. You outwardly scoff at the thought. What does he want that you have? The endgame is unknown but you were in the long game now, that much was apparent. You just had to not walk into verbal traps and wait for him to reveal his hand. But you guessed just by the times you've previously had with Hugh Ransom Drysdale that his hand wouldn't be revealed until he held the right cards.
True to his word Ransom came back what couldn't have been more than 15 minutes later. He handed you a plate containing a simple turkey sandwich, a bag of chips and a plastic bottle of water. “Just in case you get any ideas about smashing it and doing me in…” he said, placing it down.
“Murder is your speciality, not mine” you snarked back biting into your sandwich as the hunger you felt won out over the need to pee that you’d felt before. It was actually pretty good. The bread was fresh, the meat succulent, both more than likely from a deli and not a bog standard store. You ate eagerly, Ransom settled in the arm chair in the corner of the room by the low coffee table, his eyes watching you. You ignored him, concentrating on your food.
“So…” you said as you stuffed the last of your sandwich into your mouth “Are you gonna keep me down here?”
“Yup” he said simply, popping the P.
You swallowed and grabbed the water, cracking the top open and draining half of it in one, your hand trembling slightly. Thankfully you avoided spilling any. You screwed the top on and placed it back on the night stand and watched with horror as he rose from his seat and crossed towards you, sitting on the side of the bed
“So, because I don’t want anything to fuck up what we got here, sweetheart, I have a simple question which you’re gonna answer.” Ransom said, looking at you “Are you on birth-control?”
Your mouth dropped open as you glared at him.
“What the fuck?” you stuttered
“It’s a simple question that requires a yes or no answer.” His expression hadn’t changed, not one bit. Cool, calm and collected, like this was something he would simply ask anyone. As you stared at his smug face, your puzzlement at the seemingly straight outta left field question gave way to anger. He was asking you this, like it was his damned right to know, like he was your fucking boyfriend by choice.
“You tell me, I mean you thought of everything or so you took great pleasure in telling me last night.” You spat. Quick as a flash his hand grabbed your face, his fingers gripping your chin painfully and you let out a little whimper.
“Answer the question.” He said simply
And then you realised, it wasn’t really that out of left field at all was it? It was clear following last night what his intention for you was and like he’d want the added complication of any little surprises turning up in around 9 months. You swallowed, your eyes looked down
“Yes” you whispered, and he released your face.
“Good.” Ransom nodded “Makes things a lot easier.” “I’m not a sex toy, Hugh.” You glared at him and he looked back at you, giving a snort.
“You’ll be whatever I want you to be.” “You’re an asshole.”
“So it’s been said.” He shrugged simply, like he didn’t give a shit. Which, as you realised, he probably didn’t. People like him never did care what they came across like, arrogant trust fund prick.
With a sigh you pinched the bridge of your nose and glanced around the room you were in, as if you really hadn't paid much attention to it's details before. Ironically, if you weren’t here under duress it would actually be quite nice. The bed was large and comfy, there was a reasonably big bathroom attached which from what you could make out contained a fairly nice sized bath tub and a separate walk in shower cubicle. There was what looked like a built in closet next to the bathroom door, a night stand which contained a reading lamp to your right and on the opposite wall to the bed in front of you there was a dresser and a small shelf fixed to the wall a little higher, which was empty. To the left of the room was a large, plush armchair behind which another lamp was fixed to the wall and a fancy oak coffee table which matched the rest of the furniture. Above the chair, was a porthole like window, hexagonal in shape, but high enough to not allow for escape but for the warmth of daylight to seep into the space. 
A fucking studio apartment, that half of Boston would probably kill to own…and you were trapped in it. Well, certainly until you could think of a way to un-trap yourself so to speak.
You looked back at him and decided to keep pressing your luck a little. There were things you needed, starting with the bathroom, and you were damned if you were going to let him degrade you even more than he already had by letting you piss yourself.
“There are things I’m going to need.” You spoke, taking care to keep your voice neutral, attempting to avoid outwardly displaying the desperation you were feeling “A pee and a shower for one” you gestured with your head to the small bathroom.
“Well if you’re gonna behave, I’ll undo this.” He reached down and jangled the chain that was attached to the shackle round your ankle.
“Clothes too…”
“The closet is full.” He said simply “But you have to behave, Sweetheart, or you go right back on the chain.
You grit your teeth. Sweetheart, you were no more his sweetheart than he was Harlan’s favorite grandchild. “Like I have a choice.”
“You do.” He said simply “Behave or not.”
You let out a frustrated growl “I told you I was gonna, now just undo the fucking dog collar on my ankle.”
“Ooh, so feisty.” Ransom mocked and you glared at him.
With a chuckle he stood up and pulled the key out of his pocket, undoing the shackle round your ankle and stood back slightly. You moved and shuffled to the edge of the bed where he watched as you rose to your legs. However, after the ordeal you’d been through the night before, plus your no doubt whacky blood sugar level, your head span a little and you staggered forward. Ransom caught you, both his hands hooking under your arms as he helped you steady yourself, his touch surprisingly gentle as his hands slid down to your ribs, thumbs brushing underneath your breasts and you looked at him, blinking. His action had caught you off guard and if the look on his face was anything to go by it had caught him off guard too. There was a moment where you stood still before you remembered exactly what was going on and with an angry scoff you raised both your hands, palms flat on his chest and shoved him as hard as you could.
It didn’t move him much, a half a step back or so, but it was enough to make a point. The unexpected softness on his face turned to anger and a split second later his right hand was round your throat.
“I'm warning you…” he snarled, his large fingers flexing causing his grip to tighten, around your throat. He gave a sharp squeeze, not enough to cut off your airway, instead serving as a threat, telling you he could if he wanted to. He released his grip as the tears stung your eyes and he moved aside to allow you to move to the bathroom. You went as quickly as you could and once you were there you made to shut the door.
Only there wasn’t one. “Why the fuck is there no door?” you turned and faced him.
“Because I won’t clean up a dead body.” He shrugged “So before you get any dumb ideas, anything that could make you think about a means to an end isn’t in this room either.”
You looked at him, frowning before you realised what he meant and you shook your head. “Oh trust me, I’m not about to kill myself over you.”
“Good.” He said simply, “You have 10 minutes” he said, leaning on the frame where the door should have been.
“You’re not watching me pee, Hugh!”
At that his face darkened “Call me Hugh one more time, I dare you, Sweetheart.” His voice was laced with venom as his eyes flashed dangerously, but despite all that you couldn’t help yourself. It was the only weapon you had in your arsenal to deploy.
“Hugh.” you spat, raising an eyebrow.
His jaw clenched and in two large strides he was on you, his hand grabbing your forearm as he yanked you across the bathroom, your feet skidding on the tiles as you struggled for traction on the floor. You yelled out at the pain of his grip but no sooner had it started it stopped as he flung you unceremoniously into the shower cubicle. Your knees and hip collided painfully with the tray and you gave a scream as a torrent of freezing cold water hit you, soaking your sweater dress. You gasped and spluttered, struggling to your feet, the cold making your chest contract and he looked at you, his face back to its stony calm expression.
“10 minutes” he repeated.
He turned to go and in a fit of rage you peeled the icy, sodden jersey dress off and flung it at him. It hit him square in the back before it slid to the floor, splattering on the tiles in a sopping mess. You saw him take a deep breath, his broad shoulders rippling under his thermal ribbed top as he stood up square and turned to face you as you stood, teeth chattering in the still cold spray in nothing but your bra and laddered thermal tights.
“You’re really testing my patience, Sweetheart.” He intoned darkly, before he cocked an eyebrow “9 and a half minutes.” He left the bathroom and headed into the main room, and you turned away instantly cranking up the heat on the shower. As it warmed you through, the water beating down on you, you reached for the shower gel which was on a small shelf in the corner of the cubicle. You scrubbed and scrubbed, not caring how much you used, attempting to rid yourself of the dirty feeling of him as you recalled his hands all over you, his cock violating you in the way it had. You didn’t stop the tears falling, your resolve breaking, as you turned your face into the spray, allowing it to hide your tears, before you washed your hair in the shampoo and conditioner.  Eventually, when you’d done everything you could, you turned off the water, took a deep breath and squeezed your hair out before stepping out of the shower. Your eyes instinctively went to the doorway and you were relieved. You couldn’t see Ransom, which meant he didn’t have an eye-line directly into the shower, awarding you some level of privacy at least.
You grabbed a towel which you wrapped around yourself, before you took another and used it to squeeze your hair before you pulled it back into a messy bun out of the way, and stepped out of the bathroom.
 “That was 11 minutes.” Ransom said simply as you emerged into the main area of the basement “I’ll let the 90 seconds slide.”
You glared at him as he sat in the armchair, his broad frame filling it, right leg crossed over his left, an I don't give a fuck look about his face, and you knew at that moment you had never hated anyone more in your life than you hated him right then. You turned towards the closet and began to route through, the tears filling your eyes again as you concentrated on finding something to wear. You pulled a few things out, checking the tags. Not only did the prices shock you (it was all high end, designer stuff- what else would the spoilt, trust fund prick buy) but it was all your size. Which unnerved you no end. Pushing that to the back of your mind, as after all in the situation you were in it was the least of your worries, eventually you settled on a simple pale blue cashmere sweater, and a pair of jeans.
“Underwear?” you turned and looked at him. He nodded to the drawers built into the bottom of the closet and you opened it, taking a breath. Of course it would all be lace, sexy. You picked the most modest pair of black, lace French-style briefs you could find and the matching bra, tossing the lot onto the bed. You looked at him, cocking your eyebrow and he mimicked the action, gesturing with his hand.
“Don’t mind me.” The dismay washed over you as you realised what he meant and you took a deep breath “You’re gonna sit there and watch?”
“Yup.” He replied simply, popping the p loudly.
You bowed your head, knowing there was no point turning your back on him, he’d just force you to turn round. As you stared to pat yourself dry though your towel, you blinked back the tears as for some reason this felt far more humiliating and degrading that what he’d done to you last night.
****
Ransom wasn’t sure he’d ever exercised self-control like this, he normally just bought (or took) what he wanted, and before he’d wanted nothing more than to trace the beads of water which moved down her neck and back, collecting in the towel as she rifled through the closet. She reached for the panties first, and attempted to shimmy them on under the towel and he gave a click of his tongue.
“Oh no doll.” He smirked, “lose it.”
She glared at him, and he simply held her gaze, not looking away and eventually he saw her shoulder sag as she reached up with a shaking hand and unhooked the edge of the towel which was tucked in on itself and let it fall to the floor. He gave a loud hum of approval as he took her in, her long-lithe legs up to her hips, the curve of her waist, pert breasts and delicate shoulders and collar bone. She swallowed on air and he watched her throat bob, and he instantly found himself thinking how good she’d look swallowing something else. He shifted slightly in his seat, the crotch of his jeans now feeling a little tight thanks to his semi-hard cock, and she reached for the lace briefs stepping into them. As she shimmied them up, her breasts jiggled a little and he gave an inward groan. For a second he thought about stopping her, taking her there and then but now wasn’t the time. They had things to discuss, certain rules she needed to understand.
Plus, the waiting and the anticipation would simply heighten the pleasure later when he finally did fuck her again.
He remained still as she pulled on the rest of the clothes before she turned to him, her cheeks adorably flushed.
“Hairbrush?” she asked.
Ransom nodded to the dresser opposite the bed and she moved over towards it, opening one of the drawers. She reached in and pulled the item out, dragging it through her hair before she braided it quickly and then turned to him expectantly.
“Sit.” He said, gesturing to the bed. She did as she was told, sinking down onto the edge of it, her hands clasped in her laps, fingers of her right hand pulling at the ones in her left nervously.
“Ok…” he leaned forward, his hands resting on his knees as he looked at her “Here’s how it’s gonna work.”
At his words Y/N looked at him, and then her hands released each other and she folded her arms, crossing her legs on the bed, chewing on her cheek with a sullen look on her face. The look of someone that really didn’t want to listen but had no option.
Such a petulant brat.
“You’re gonna do what I tell you, when I tell you.” Ransom spoke calmly and authoritatively “If I want you, I’m gonna have you.” At that she took a shaky breath but her eyes remained on his as he continued “You behave, you’ll get rewarded. If you don’t, you’ll be punished.”
“Punished?” she sputtered. “What could possibly be a worse punishment than this?” she waved her hand and Ransom allowed himself a chuckle.
Oh, Doll, you have no idea…
“Do you really want to know?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow up.
“No.” she said, hanging her head slightly.
“Smart move.” He nodded.
“Anything else?” she looked back at him, the defiance once more filling her features.
“Yes, don’t call me Hugh.”
At that she smirked and he felt a flash of annoyance “Sorry, am I amusing you?”
“Nope.” She shook her head quickly, the smirk fading as quick as it had appeared.
“Good.” He said, his palms slapping his thighs as he stood up.
“Is that it?”
“For now.” He nodded.
“Do I get to make any rules?”
Ransom hesitated, and looked at her. He had to hand it to her, she was gutsy but that was part of the reason she was hear after all. He shook his head, chuckling slightly “This isn’t a negotiation.”
“Can I ask you for things?”
“I just said, this isn’t a negotiation.” He started to get a little bit irked at her attitude now, “You behave, you get things.”
“So you’re gonna leave me down here with nothing? No TV, no books, no stereo?”
“Behave and I’ll think about it.” He replied simply and when she sighed he knew she understood that arguing and bargaining with him was futile.
Ransom Drysdale bargained with no one.
“You know…” he said, stepping towards the bed and she instantly took a deep breath, shying away a little. The fact he had so much power over her was exhilarating and he smiled, stopping a foot or so away from the edge of the bed, his large frame towering over her. “I should shackle you again, for your back chatting and slapping me in the back with your wet clothes but I’m fair. I’ll let that go. I hadn’t explained my rules.”
She blinked up at him and he nodded towards the bathroom. “Put your dirty stuff in the hamper. I’ll be back later.”
As he strode towards the door he could have sworn he heard her mumble something, something that sounded suspiciously like she’d called him a prick. He stopped, smirking, before he fixed a hard look on his face and turned round.
“What was that?”
“Nothing.” She said quickly
“Thought not.” He nodded, and with that he turned and left, locking the numerous bolts on the door behind him.
**** With a lack of anything else to do you cleaned up the water from the bathroom floor and tossed everything into the hamper like you’d been told to do and then, taking advantage of your new found “freedom” so to speak you set about exploring every single nook and cranny of your ‘cell’. You found the bathroom was fully stocked with all sorts of toiletries, sanitary products (fuck, you didn’t even want to think about what he was going to do to get his sordid little kicks when Aunt Flow came to visit in 3 weeks or so), there was a little make up as well in the drawer in the vanity unit that you’d spotted before and you pulled it out to examine it, once again finding it to be not your usual brand but high end all the same. Finding all this was only compounding your confusion as to what the hell his goal was in all this, but as you had realised before until he decided to show you those cards, you would simply be playing a guessing game.
In the drawers under your bed you found a few different sets of linen which was a relief as it meant you weren’t going to be at his mercy as to when you could change your bedding. Given what had happened the night before, you were half tempted to change them again but you hesitated and decided to wait until later, because you had a sinking feeling he was going to take you again, especially given his declaration earlier.
“If I want you, I’m gonna have you.”
If that was how your life was going to go for the foreseeable, you’d be going through a hell of a lot of bedding if you changed it every time he fucked you. Much more than was contained in the drawers anyway.
Pushing that horrible thought from your head, you took a deep breath, focussing on staying calm, staying collected, staying alive. She needed her wits, her strength, her continued ability of self preservation. And, given the fact that he's murdered before, you weren't entirely trusting his word of not wanting to kill you. You closed the drawers and then settled yourself down on the floor at the side of the bed nearest the arm chair and low coffee table indulging in a few yoga stretches and the like in an attempt to ease out your still aching muscles. You were sat on the floor, with your legs extended, reaching for your toes when he came back and with a little smirk on his face handed you a book.
“For the boredom.”
You blinked and then took it from him, shaking your head as you realised it was one of his granddads, most likely his idea of a joke. And what was more it was one you’d already read.
Nevertheless, not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, you thanked him and then stood up and dropped into the chair, opening the cover. How long had passed you had no idea, but you were a good few chapters on when the trust fund ass wipe re-emerged, and the smell of food wafted across the room. He set a tray down on the bed and jerked his head towards it, in a silent instruction for you to vacate the seat. With a roll of your eyes you tried to get comfortable on the bed to eat with said tray balanced on your knee and with an exasperated groan you looked at him.
“Is there any chance of getting some form of table and chair so I can eat off it and not where I’m expected to sleep?”
He looked at you for a second, before he shrugged “I’ll think about it, depending on how you behave.”
The chicken was dry, but you ate it anyway, remembering your earlier thoughts about staying strong. As you chewed you watched him where he sat in the chair in the corner of the room, looking at something on his phone. Having had time to think things over even more, you knew you needed to play this clever, get him on your side, let him believe that you could be trusted if you wanted to stand any chance of getting out of here. With a deep breath you supressed the desire you had to simply remain silent, sullen even and spoke.
“Are you not eating?” you asked him and he looked at you, surprise on his face.
“I had a big lunch.” He responded simply.
“Well I hope it was better than this.” You arranged your face into the best playful look you could muster “Because, no offence, it sucks.”
Ransom looked at you, before he snorted “Yeah, cooking isn’t my forte.”
“Maybe I could do it.” You offered “I’m not a bad chef.”
His eyes locked on yours and you concentrated on keeping the look on your face innocent as he studied you. Eventually he spoke again “Maybe. If you behave.”
Again, the focus on your behaviour. He clearly wanted you to be good, compliant maybe. Bolstered by the slight progress you were making into maybe understanding what you needed to do you continued. “So, did you go anywhere nice? For lunch I mean.”
“The Harbor.” He responded “Food was good, company was slightly irritating.”
“Company?” the surprise in your tone was genuine
“I met my mother.”
“Oh.” You replied, looking back down at the plate as you blinked back the tears, the thought of your own mother filling your head. She would be beside herself now. You took a deep breath, you might be able to be compliant but you were damned if you were going to show him any weakness, that’s what he wanted. Instead, you took another bite of your meal and looked up at him. “That must have been nice for you.”
“Is that sarcasm?” Ransom asked in an amused tone and you rolled your eyes.
“No, I was being serious. Mind you, you don’t strike me as being close to your family so…” you shrugged and shovelled a soggy piece of broccoli into your mouth.
“You’re smart, we're not.” He shrugged “But she wanted to know how I was getting on.”
“Bet that conversation was positively riveting.” You smirked “And that was sarcasm by the way.”
Ransom scoffed “It wasn’t bad to be honest, that was until she steered it around to Marta.”
“Marta?” you frowned, pondering what on earth could have brought their conversation around to that. “Why did you talk about her?”
“What is this Jeopardy?” he arched an eyebrow at you and you rolled your eyes. “Why not, I'll take Drysdale family politics for my share of the inheritance, Alec…”
“Watch your mouth, Sweetheart.” His tone was warning and his face stony. You swallowed and looked down at the plate.
“Sorry.” You said, keeping up your act. Silence fell again and you finished the last of your dinner and set the tray on the nightstand.
Ransom took a deep breath “Seeing as you’re so interested, Marta has approached my mother and the family about holding a memorial for Harlan.” You looked at him, and his eyebrows raised. “Ironic huh, the bitch who stole what was mine is planning a memorial for my grandad when she’s responsible for his death.”
At that you scoffed, he really was unbelievable and just like that your resolve to be nice started to ebb away at his utter narcissism “Are you for real? You’re responsible for Harlan’s death, and as for taking what was yours, you never had anything, none of you did! It was Harlan’s, you didn’t earn it.” Ransom glowered at you but you continued, shaking your head with a derisive laugh. “You know, the fact he would rather leave it to his nurse than his own family says more about you all than it does about her."
“What did you just say?” His voice was low, and there was an unmistakable flash of anger on his face.
“You heard me. Not that I expect any of that to bother you, Hugh, you do and take what you want anyway and fuck whoever gets hurt in the crossfire…” at that you gestured around the room, “prime example…”
There was a pause and in an instance you realised your mistake. You’d called him inadequate and worse, had broken one of those fucking rules, called him Hugh. His whole demeanour had changed, he was pissed. His jaw was set, his eyes dark, his entire body rigid.
Shit.
In a flash he was off the chair. You reacted equally as quick, jumping off the bed in an attempt to put some distance in between you. Why, you had no idea, it wasn’t like you were going to stop him, but maybe if you could buy some time you could talk him down as you backed toward the door. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…” but your apology was cut off as he rounded the bed, grabbing your hair painfully, yanking your braid down so your head was tilted back, looking at him. You let out a scream of pain and moved your hands to grab at his wrists “Oww, shit…you’re hurting me!”
“Like I care.” He snarled “Now, we can do this the easy way or the hard way.”
That predatory look was back on his face and you knew you were in for it again, and your apologetic front flew completely from your mind. Like hell you were doing this without a fight.
“Fuck you.” You spat back.
“Hard way it is.” He shrugged.
His hand tightening around your hair, he manhandled you into the middle of the bed easily. You yelled, bucked, lashed out but as with the previous night you were simply no match for him. He easily pinned you down with his knees clamped either side of your hips, holding you in place as he yanked your sweater over your head, pulling it down your arms so they were pinned behind you back. It was uncomfortable but did the job perfectly you realised to your horror, because you couldn’t move your arms at all.
Ransom then moved, his large hands grabbing at the button on your waistband and you continued to struggle, trying to buck your hips but once more to no avail. He had your jeans and panties down to your knees easily, before he flipped you over so your face was pushed into the pillow where it muffled your screams slightly. 
One hand reached up, sliding round the front of your neck and he squeezed. This time it was harder than he had done earlier that day, and the pressure increased and increased, slowly shutting off your airway. You gasped, tears stinging in your eye as you desperately tried to move but it was pointless. Then, suddenly he eased off, and you drew in a harsh gasp of air, coughing and spluttering, still conscious that his fingers remained around your throat.
“Stop fighting it.” He instructed, his other hand sliding over your entrance, making you pull away from his touch, but to no avail as the hand that was on your throat slid down your spine and twisted the sweater, tightening your make shift restraints, jerking your arms even further behind your back. Your upper arms and shoulders screamed in protest and you let out a little sob of pain as he moved both his hands to your hips, tugging them up slightly. One hand trailed over your ass before he plunged two fingers into you and you jerked forward at the intrusion. Ransom groaned before he leaned over, his lips brushing your ear. “I can feel you. Your body doesn’t lie, Sweetheart.”
You turned your head away, pressing your cheek into the pillow and Ransom uncurled himself from over you and you felt him shift behind you. The tell-tale clanking of a belt buckle, followed by a zip and the rustling of fabric told you exactly what was coming. Despite your resolve to give him nothing, a choked whimper escaped your mouth and you turned you face, pressing it further into the pillow in an attempt to stifle your sobs.
“Oh no…” he said, one hand curling into your braid, yanking hard and jerking your head back. You cried out, your body was contorted in such an unnatural shape, back arched, arms pinned behind your spine, head jerked back. “I wanna hear you.”
He shuffled a little, and you felt the top of his cock teasing your entrance and then without warning he powered forward, stuffing you full, letting out a rumble of a growl as he did so.
“So fucking tight…” he grit out as he withdrew, then plunged straight back in, jerking your body as he did so. He took a few more deep, slow thrusts before he picked up the pace and began to piston into you, relentlessly. You felt each thrust, the slap of his balls slamming towards your clit. It hurt, just as it had done last time. He had zero self-control, grunting and growling as he bottomed out with every motion. The hand that was gripping your hip went beyond bruising, his dull nails biting at your skin as the other wound tighter around your braid, the odd angle of your body gritting at your joints. You were fighting tears and sobs as your body continued to betray you, soaking your walls, allowing his cock to slide in and out effortlessly. The hand against your hip glided along your side as a deep thrust came and you could feel it grip your breast between the mattress. His thumb brushing against your nipple through your bra. The friction of his piston thrusts, his hand forcing your bralete against your nipples and the yank of your hair was driving your body into sensory overload and filled you with burning sensations that verged on painful. The tip of his cock scrapped at your insides, no doubt bruising you. Your tears burned and your throat begged with dry thirst.
“Can feel you, Sweetheart…” he groaned, as he bottomed out, rotating his hips slightly making you cry out involuntarily “You feel close…you sound close…such a needy little slut.”
“I’m not a slut…” you sob, the feeble protest sounding as pathetic as you felt.
"Fucking look like one to me..." he growled, his hips rotating again, the burn in your stomach was now getting to hard to ignore. “Please…” you begged, “Just….stop…”
He answered your plea by driving deeper into you, picking up his pace once more and you felt yourself beginning to tumble.
"Oh God," the words flew from your mouth as your body shook violently and you took on your overload of orgasm and sensory extremes. You sobbed as your body betrayed you again with this man. Your mind screaming for understanding, your insides begging for more.
“Fuck…Sweetheart…” Ransom let out a groan as he picked up the pace, before after a few more deep thrusts, the hand that was holding your hair let go. Your head fell forward as you felt the warm ribbons of his come streak up your back before he released his hold on your hip and you collapsed onto the bed, your heart and self-respect shattered.
Every inch of your body ached thanks to the way you’d been contorted and as you lay still, trying to regain some control of your limbs you felt his hands press either side of your head and gave a sob as he leaned lean over your body, his ears brushing your lips.
“I'll take you like that every fucking day if I have to until you give in. Because you will.”
At that the feel of his chest that had been pressing into your back was gone and you heard a rustle of clothing and then footsteps across the floor before the door opened and his deep baritone filled the room once more.
“I would shackle you but I don’t think we need that anymore. You’re not going anywhere.” His tone was almost playful, like he was toying with you, teasing you. “I suggest you take a bath, you’re gonna be sore. That is, once you manage to work your way out of that sweater.”
And with a click followed by the familiar sliding of bolts you were sealed in your prison and you finally gave in to your tears as the sheer helplessness of your situation crashed over you in waves.
****
Part 3
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Murder, He Wrote
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Part 2
Co-Written with @southerngracela​
Summary: After your ordeal at the hands of Ransom, you’re not sure that things can get any worse. Famous last words….
Warnings: Bad language words. MATURE (NSFW 18+) NON-CON situation, kidnap, violence. DO NOT READ IF ANY OF THOSE TRIGGER… READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!
Pairing: DARK! Ransom Drysdale x Reader
A/N:  So this is Part 2 to our submission for @jtargaryen18​ ‘s Haunted House 2020  Challenge. Once again READ THE WARNINGS!!!! This is a DARK Series… don’t @ us if you can’t follow simple instructions and end up with butt-hurt. And if you’re under 18…get off my blog.
Series Masterlist. 
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With his pride wounded, Ransom drank himself to sleep that night, his mind plotting and scheming of more ways to make his point clear. She was his now and nothing was going to change that. He'd decided it might be time to let her in on his secrets and breakfast seemed as good a time as any and, as such, presented her with a plate of bacon and toast along with a cup of coffee to wash it down. He didn't cook, not well anyway, his preference being diner out or order in. He supposed if this was his new normal, he'd have to learn a new skill. He cringed just slightly at the thought of such domesticity. 
When you heard the locks turn, your belly dropped out. You were shocked to see him, afraid of what was coming your way. If the events from the previous night were any indication, you had to steel yourself to once again fight back. Your tired eyes took him in. A plate and mug in his hands, jeans over his long legs, boots on his feet. Broad shoulders covered by a white ribbed long sleeve thermal shirt, eyes cold and distant, arrogant smirk over his lips. A smirk of your own barely parted your lips as you took note of the now pink lines adorning his right cheek, courtesy of your nails biting at his skin in the attack. You turned away from him, your body instinctively curling in on itself, chain stopping you from balling up completely when he approached. Your mouth watered at the smell of the bacon and coffee. You were hungry but your body fought to ignore the pangs, offering him that satisfaction.
 "I'm not hungry," you managed, desperately irritated at how weak you sounded. 
"Starve then," he set the plate and mug on the nightstand at your bedside. He stood rooted there, arms crossed over his chest. 
"People are gonna be looking for me, you know," you point out, sitting up a little more, confidence growing by the second. 
“You don’t think I’ve already thought of that?” His hands moved from across his chest to his hips. 
As you looked at him, that maddening smug look present on his face it suddenly dawned on you that he might have been more calculating than you’d imagined. And then you understood. You figured out what the connection between him and the actor you’d been supposedly meeting was. None. None whatsoever, except that Lucas Lee had been easy, collateral damage. "You set him up," your brow rose and shock filled your voice. "Lucas Lee... You set him up. What the hell did you do?" 
"Sweetheart, the guy's a complete tool, he walked right into it and he'll walk right out. Just a couple of hours of questioning and he'll be let go," Ransom shrugged as if this were nothing. 
"You're disgusting," you seethe. This arrogant asshole used someone just to get to you and he was PROUD of it. You didn't know what you expected, but the notion of the reality was appalling.
"You don't know the half of it," he winked.
"You're never going to get away with this," you managed to threaten. The look in his eyes caught your breath as he leaned in close, hands on the mattress on either side of your hips. 
"I killed Fran, got away with that. I nearly killed Marta, same story," he said, popping a shoulder up. "The point is, Sweetheart, I'm that good, they'll never find you."
"My family, my friends…they'll go to the police. Mick, my boss, he'll want to know where I am after not showing up today. You can't possibly have thought of everything," you shook your head as you wondered just how long he'd been plotting this. You’d only met the asshole a few months ago, interviewed him for a couple of hours max and then released the article days later. How on earth had that transpired into this utter shirt-show? The thoughts were spiraling so fast in your mind, it was dizzying. 
"Your boss got an email this morning saying you no longer wanted to work for him, and as for your family and friends, well let’s just say I know where they are. I know your little sister's routine. I know the time your mom walks your dog, and that she does it alone.” Ransom continued and you felt the cold course through your body “You do as I say, and they're safe. If not, well, I can pick them off, one, by one, without even getting my hands dirty," he pulled back, standing over you. "So many criminal junkies in Boston, Sweetheart. Plenty who will take the fall for a little hit,” and with that he turned on his heel and walked to the door. 
The true reality of your situation set in and you felt sick to your stomach, despite your hunger. You felt clammy and overwhelmingly dizzy. He had you. If he'd gone this far, followed your family, set up a well-known actor, plotted this entire plan down to how to convince Mick you quit, in a scary short amount of time, just to get to you, you were fully trapped. 
"What happens if you lock me down here...and something happens to you?” Worry laced your words. 
He turned over his shoulder, "I don't give a fuck." And he slammed the door, the sound of the locks echoing in your room. 
In a gut reaction you grabbed the plate of food at threw it at the door where it shattered into pieces, the bacon and toast falling to the floor with it. You screamed as you threw it, for if you hadn't you'd have vomited where you led. 
**** Ransom heard the scream and the smash of the plate and paused half way up the stairs. He took a deep breath, contemplating going back down and teaching Y/N some damned manners before he decided to leave it. He’d given her enough to think about for the time being, and besides, he didn’t want to lower himself to delivering another slap to her face like he had done last night. In all honesty, he hadn’t been expecting the site of the bruise on her right cheek to unsettle him as much as it had done. Her pretty face shouldn’t be marked in anyway, and looking at it had simply reminded him how he’d lost control. Of all the things he’d done, he’d never hit a woman before, despite murder and attempted murder. It left a bad taste in his mouth all things considered and a nasty twist in his gut that felt almost like guilt. But it wasn’t guilt, that wasn’t something he did either…no, it was the fact that in all of his actions, even the diabolical ones, he’d remained calm and in control. Until last night. He’d been feral, wild even, and it wasn’t a feeling he relished. But she’d pushed him to it, provoked him. It was her fault, not his.
He shrugged on his coat and grabbed his keys, before he headed out, locking the door and climbing into his black Mercedes SUV. God he missed his beamer, but this was a lot less conspicuous, just as he needed at the moment. He slipped his sunglasses on to shield his eyes against the bright fall sun and set off towards the City.
His mother was already seated and waiting for him when he arrived at the Harbor. He walked over to her table, pulling off his sunglasses and sliding them into the pocket of his camel coat, removing his trademark silk scarf as he went. He handed them off to the help showing him to his seat, asking him to bring him a beer, and sat across from Linda, who was watching him carefully as she lounged back in her seat, properly dressed as ever in a crisp pair of black trousers and a white long sleeved silk blouse. With her legs crossed, she cut quite the imposing figure, but not to him.
Ransom greeted her with a stiff nod and she frowned and gestured to his face.
“What on earth have you done to your cheek?” she questioned, clearly noticing the scratch marks. Ransom hesitated for a second, “Things got a little rough last night, ” he shrugged but his smirk didn't quite reach his eyes. Linda let out a slight groan as she grimaced “Jesus Ransom, I don’t want to know about your sordid little bedroom antics,” she scalded. “Then don’t ask, Mother,” He drawled, not missing a beat.
“Oh believe me, I wish I hadn't.” Linda rolled her eyes.
Ransom looked down at the menu that was on the table in front of him, giving it a cursory glance already knowing what he was ordering, the same as he always did when he was here, before he took a deep breath and raised his eyes to his mother. She wasn’t one for small talk, and neither was he, so he decided to get straight to the point.
“Why are we here?” he demanded “I mean, aside from the obvious guilt driven task of having lunch with your son.” “If you're going to be a spoiled brat why did you even agree to meet me?” Linda shot back and Ransom smirked.
“What was it you always told me mom? No matter how rich you are, never turn down a free meal.”
“Snarky smart ass” Linda retorted and it was his turn to snort as her brow furrowed.
“Now, now Mother. Those frown lines are getting worse” he arched an eyebrow and she glared at him before she sighed.
“I wanted to see how you were, is that so hard to believe.” “In a word, yes.” He shrugged.
“Well, it’s true.” She reached for her glass of wine and took a sip. “I've not seen you since you moved house.”
Ransom rolled his eyes, Jesus he didn’t have time for this shit. He took a deep breath and looked at her as she eyed him expectantly, waiting for his answer “Just fine. I'm enjoying my new place.”
“So, you like it then?” Linda set her glass down and leaned back once more. “I must admit when it came on our books I thought it would suit you.”
“It's different than Kenoak, less modern, but it does the job” he said vaguely and saw her body language stiffen.
“If you don’t like it why did you buy it Ransom?” her tone was exasperated and he had to fight back the grin that was threatening to spread across his face at the fact he was riling her. It was always so damned easy.
“Well, my last place had kinda turned into a bit of a media circus.”
“Yeah, I expect that’s what happens when you're involved in a homicide” she snapped back.
“Say it a bit louder.” Ransom deadpanned “I don’t think they heard you over by the bar.”
“Believe me, that wasn’t intentional.” she held his gaze “Your Granddad’s death isn't something I find funny, Ransom. Not that it ever occurred to you."
Ransom sighed. He was starting to get annoyed under her scrutiny and really wasn’t in the mood for a deep dive into the events of the past year.
“Not of sound mind, Mother.” He said, his voice a little softer as he reminded her of the argument his brief had made which had ensured his acquittal from his crimes, hoping it would shut her up. “Remember?”
“I know son, I know.” Linda leaned over and gently lay her hand on his where it rested on the table. Ransom took a deep breath and shifted in his seat. Physical affection from her always made him uncomfortable as he wasn’t used to it, but for some reason it was heightened in that moment. He sat and pondered for a second on what he had just said. His brief had spun the line about him being under emotional duress due to his granddad cutting him out of his will and whilst there was an element of truth in it, he’d been of perfect mental capacity when he’d enacted his plan. But, if it helped his mother believe that her only son isn’t a monster then…whatever. He pulled his hand back from her and she sighed, clearly mistaking his discomfort for guilt.
 “You know, you used to be such an affectionate little boy, Ransom.” Linda looked at her hand as if his rebuttal had burned her before she shook her head and reached once more for her drink. “I often wonder where your dad and I went wrong.”
Ok, so this he could deal with. The reminder that he was a constant disappointment.
 “Hard to say.” He snarked “Somewhere between boarding school and Harvard maybe?”
She rolled her eyes “We did what we thought was best.” She set her now empty glass down. “Clearly in hindsight...”
Ransom was saved from her self-indulgent moment of soul searching by the waiter who set his beer down in front of him and asked if they were ready to order. Ransom gestured to his mother who asked for the house salad with a side of tempura prawns whilst he went for his usual, fillet steak with all the trimmings. It was obnoxiously expensive but what the hell, like he cared. Especially not when his Mother was paying...
He took a long pull from his beer as the waiter topped his mother’s glass up from the bottle that stood in the ice bucket next to their table before she thanked him and he disappeared.
“You’ve not asked me how your father is.” Linda looked at Ransom who narrowed his eyes. Why does she care about that? But, deciding it was as good a conversation change as any he shrugged.
“How's Richard?”
Linda rolled her eyes but for the first time since he arrived he noticed a little smirk flicker on her lips before she looked at him. “He’s still your dad Ransom" she reminded.
“Ok, how is my dearest dad? Still fucking the 30 year old au-pair?”
“Yes, apparently, he's taking her to the villa.”
Now that did make him frown. The Villa that they owned in Lake Gada was his mother’s pride and joy.
“Seriously? You're just gonna let him do that?” Ransom’s tone was surprised.
“I have no choice.” Linda took a deep breath “Our divorce isn't final and he's contesting me keeping the property. It's not as cut and dry as one would assume despite his infidelity, numerous infidelities even.”
“He signed a pre-nup, Mom.” Ransom reminded her and Linda nodded.
“I know, but the Villa wasn't part of it. It's the one thing he can hold over me and he's doing just that.” She took a sip of her drink and snorted “Dumb bastard has nothing so he figures why not try his luck here. Fact is, he gets nothing else.”
“Good.”  Ransom retorted, a little viciously and Linda eyed himself shrewdly.
“Careful Ransom, you almost sound like you care.” She smirked and he rolled his eyes, not gracing her with an answer. “Anyway, what are you doing with yourself these days?” she moved the conversation on “And I don't mean with women as we've already established when you sat down. Any hobbies or God forbid a job prospect I should know about?” “Aside from my love life, I’m actually writing mother, believe it or not.” He responded, amused at the visible look of shock that crossed her face.
“You're....writing?” her mouth dropped open before she hastily shut it.
“Don't sound too surprised, Linda,” Ransom let out a low chuckle as his mother rolled her eyes at his use of her name. “Granddad always said I had a flare for it. Just-” he paused for a moment before he shrugged “-well, I guess I never really used it much.”
Linda cocked her head to the side as she considered him for a moment before her face softened and once more Ransom felt uncomfortable at her change in demeanour. “He'd be proud of you. I suppose it's what he's always wanted for you, to find something for yourself.”
And there it was. The reminder that he was nothing but a trust fund prick, with no future and nothing of his own to live off. He took a deep breath, gritting his teeth slightly before he responded with a false air of nonchalance.
“I see that now.”
“Good. I'm pleased you do Son.” Linda nodded. “I'm not glad about how it all went down but...well, as dad used to say, things have a strange way of working out in the end.” It was a funny choice of words, Ransom thought, but before he had chance to dwell on it anymore their food arrived. The conversation slowed a little as they both ate, growing a little stilted in places as he told her vaguely what his writing project was about- a private detective- go figure. Linda moaned about more about his father, and then she dropped something casually into the conversation that really did surprise him, that they were planning a memorial for Harlan. 
"When?" he frowned, swallowing a mouthful of potato.
“The end of this month, possibly the first week in December. It'll be after Thanksgiving.” Linda waved her hand before she paused, hesitating a little as if she was deliberating whether or not to tell him this next bit. And when she did, he fully realised why. “It was Marta’s idea.” The mere mention of that name was enough to get his hackles up and he took a deep breath, the nerve in his jaw twitching. He looked at his mother as she watched him carefully before he looked away and took a drink of his beer. “Hmmm” was all he could muster.
“Hmmm? What's Hmm, Ransom?” Linda looked at him.
“I figured with Harlan gone she'd be out of our lives.” He shrugged, feeling his neck grow hot. That bitch was responsible for all of this in the first place, the reason he was done out of his inheritance. If she hadn’t got her claws into him none of his would have happened.
“Yes, well, as much as it sticks in my throat that she got everything maybe if we play ball she'll come round to actually giving us all what we're owed.” Linda shrugged “And that aside...it will be nice to remember him.”
The rest of the lunch passed with simple conversation, Ransom steering it well away from the subject of his family. When they’d finished his mother, as predicted, picked up the tab and together they headed outside to wait for the Valet to fetch their vehicles. His mother’s arrived first and she turned to him, the pair of them engaging in the awkward, stilted kissing of the cheeks before she promised him his quarterly check from his shares in her company should land next week. With a nod and a thanks he bid her good bye and a few moments later climbed into his own car and set off back home.
***** With a yell you sat bolt upright, taking a moment to get your bearings as you emerged from the troubled sleep you had fallen back into. Yes, you were still here, in Drysdale’s fucking basement. The tears stung your eyes as you lay back, taking some deep breaths as you attempted to ebb the panic which was setting in. Your situation was disgusting and dire, you were trapped and therefore, you knew you needed to ask for the things you needed, not wanted, just simply needed, or in time, Hugh could add you to his notch post of growing murder victims. The question was, exactly how far could you push him for anything? One wrong move, as you'd learned last night, and you'd be regretting ever uttering a syllable. But you refused to go quietly, you'd be further letting yourself down if you did. You didn't have it in you. However, just how dangerous he was or could be now was no longer lost on you, you had the physical reminder in the biting sting of your cheek, throbbing and tenderness you felt between your legs, and the slight bruising around your wrists where he had pinned them above your head. You hadn’t examined the rest of your body to see what damage he’d done, you didn’t want to.
You ached all over from being led or sat on this damned bed since you’d arrived. The chain attaching you to the bed post wasn’t long enough to allow you to stand up and stretch our your aching limbs so for now you had to settle for attempting to massage some feeling back into your calves, your eyes casting over the various tears and ladders in your thick tights which you’d pulled back up last night with trembling hands after he had violated you.
The door clicked open and your head jerked towards the door as you scrambled higher up the bed, pressing your back into the headboard. You watched as your captor strode in, a packet of Biscoff in his hand pausing as his foot crunched over the shattered remnants of the plate that you’d hurled at the door. He looked up at you, raising an eyebrow, as if he'd forgotten he'd heard you throw it this morning. 
“I don’t like cleaning up messes” He said simply as he stepped over it, shutting the door with his foot.
“Pity you killed the house keeper then” you glared at him as he shoved another cookie into his mouth.
“Who, Fran?” he asked with a scoff, his voice muffled by his food.
“How many other house keepers have you killed?” you shot back and he gave a snort.
“None.” Ransom shrugged nonchalantly “But for your information, Fran was a useless dimwit. She only cared about two things. Drugs and getting paid.”
You frowned, was that supposed to justify his actions in some way? He too only cared about getting paid and what money could do for him. “And you care about what exactly other than yourself?” you shot back. He looked at you, a smirk crossing his handsome face as she shoved yet another cookie into his mouth, chewing slowly.
At that point your stomach growled with hunger, just another way your body had betrayed since you since you had arrived and you tore your face from his, turning it to the side.
“Now are you hungry?” he asked as you realised that was probably the bastard’s plan all along. With a deep sigh you looked back at him.
“Can I have one?” you asked meekly.
Ransom studied you for a moment, tongue poking at his cheek, before he strode towards the bed and offered you the packet. You took one and stuffed it straight into your mouth.
“No thank you?”
“Piss off.” You shot back automatically, swallowing your cookie.
His good demeanour ebbed slightly as an irritated look flashed across his face. “Don’t push me, Sweetheart.” his voice was low as he sank onto the side of the bed, looking at you “I think your situation is precarious enough as it is, don’t you?”
You merely glared at him, you had no comeback. There was no comeback. He was right.
“Now if I make you something proper to eat are you gonna take it or throw it at the door again?” he raised his eyebrows “Because, frankly, you starving yourself is of no real concern to me except I kinda think you’re gonna need to keep your strength up.”
It didn’t take a genius to work out exactly what for. But you were so hungry, and the battle inside you raged on before your self-preservation mode won out and you hung your head slightly, looking at the comforter you were led on. “I’ll eat.”
“See, that wasn’t so hard was it?” Ransom smirked again.
“No.” you replied, your voice devoid of emotion. “Can I have some water too?”
“As long as you don’t throw the glass.”
“I’m thirsty.” You replied simply “I won’t.”
He nodded and stood up, offering you the packet of cookies “Have those for now.”
“Thank you.” You took them from him, your tone a little sarcastic, your eyes rolling as you spoke. He looked at you and for a moment you were worried he was about to do something about your response but he simply gave a huff of laughter and turned to leave.
“I’ll be back shortly.” He said, closing the door behind him. 
You could no longer bite back the sigh of delight as you took another of the buttery spiced cookies into your mouth. It was rich on your tongue but it was food and you were so hungry. What you wouldn't do for a cup of coffee to go with. You surveyed the room as you chewed the Biscoff thoughtfully. The earlier despair you’d felt upon waking just before he had re-appeared was slowly giving way to determination as you realised that for now practicality had to win you over. Not only did you need sustenance and water, which you knew was on the way, you also needed clothing and access to the bathroom, which you now realized you were desperate for.
So now what, you thought to yourself. The fact that he was willing to feed you despite the fact you’d launched your morning’s meal against the door meant he didn't want you dead. Mind you, if he did you wouldn’t have made it out of that fucking dilapidated house so, just what kind of a game was he playing at here? You weren't sure what his end game was if it didn't mean your certain death. You just didn't understand and felt the struggle of thoughts seep into your mind as you contemplated each step. He doesn't want you dead, but you're locked up, chained up and he's obliterated your body by force. And that was only the first round. So far he's voiced his hell bent plan on keeping you here and making you suffer. And he's done a right job at it after just the first night. He couldn't keep this up for the rest of your life, could he? No, you didn't think, but he's gone as far as to know your every day, your family's every day, detail for detail. It couldn't possibly be for ironically a ransom, no, he had plenty of money still and if you were certain, his mother was still finding ways to slip him allowances and he'd managed to get a small chunk under the table and off the record from your publishers on your behalf. So no, it wasn't for money. Did he expect a better and firm, more sincere apology? Well he sure as shit wasn't going to get one now. Stupid, spoiled fuck. You outwardly scoff at the thought. What does he want that you have? The endgame is unknown but you were in the long game now, that much was apparent. You just had to not walk into verbal traps and wait for him to reveal his hand. But you guessed just by the times you've previously had with Hugh Ransom Drysdale that his hand wouldn't be revealed until he held the right cards.
True to his word Ransom came back what couldn't have been more than 15 minutes later. He handed you a plate containing a simple turkey sandwich, a bag of chips and a plastic bottle of water. “Just in case you get any ideas about smashing it and doing me in…” he said, placing it down.
“Murder is your speciality, not mine” you snarked back biting into your sandwich as the hunger you felt won out over the need to pee that you’d felt before. It was actually pretty good. The bread was fresh, the meat succulent, both more than likely from a deli and not a bog standard store. You ate eagerly, Ransom settled in the arm chair in the corner of the room by the low coffee table, his eyes watching you. You ignored him, concentrating on your food.
“So…” you said as you stuffed the last of your sandwich into your mouth “Are you gonna keep me down here?”
“Yup” he said simply, popping the P.
You swallowed and grabbed the water, cracking the top open and draining half of it in one, your hand trembling slightly. Thankfully you avoided spilling any. You screwed the top on and placed it back on the night stand and watched with horror as he rose from his seat and crossed towards you, sitting on the side of the bed
“So, because I don’t want anything to fuck up what we got here, sweetheart, I have a simple question which you’re gonna answer.” Ransom said, looking at you “Are you on birth-control?”
Your mouth dropped open as you glared at him.
“What the fuck?” you stuttered
“It’s a simple question that requires a yes or no answer.” His expression hadn’t changed, not one bit. Cool, calm and collected, like this was something he would simply ask anyone. As you stared at his smug face, your puzzlement at the seemingly straight outta left field question gave way to anger. He was asking you this, like it was his damned right to know, like he was your fucking boyfriend by choice.
“You tell me, I mean you thought of everything or so you took great pleasure in telling me last night.” You spat. Quick as a flash his hand grabbed your face, his fingers gripping your chin painfully and you let out a little whimper.
“Answer the question.” He said simply
And then you realised, it wasn’t really that out of left field at all was it? It was clear following last night what his intention for you was and like he’d want the added complication of any little surprises turning up in around 9 months. You swallowed, your eyes looked down
“Yes” you whispered, and he released your face.
“Good.” Ransom nodded “Makes things a lot easier.” “I’m not a sex toy, Hugh.” You glared at him and he looked back at you, giving a snort.
“You’ll be whatever I want you to be.” “You’re an asshole.”
“So it’s been said.” He shrugged simply, like he didn’t give a shit. Which, as you realised, he probably didn’t. People like him never did care what they came across like, arrogant trust fund prick.
With a sigh you pinched the bridge of your nose and glanced around the room you were in, as if you really hadn't paid much attention to it's details before. Ironically, if you weren’t here under duress it would actually be quite nice. The bed was large and comfy, there was a reasonably big bathroom attached which from what you could make out contained a fairly nice sized bath tub and a separate walk in shower cubicle. There was what looked like a built in closet next to the bathroom door, a night stand which contained a reading lamp to your right and on the opposite wall to the bed in front of you there was a dresser and a small shelf fixed to the wall a little higher, which was empty. To the left of the room was a large, plush armchair behind which another lamp was fixed to the wall and a fancy oak coffee table which matched the rest of the furniture. Above the chair, was a porthole like window, hexagonal in shape, but high enough to not allow for escape but for the warmth of daylight to seep into the space. 
A fucking studio apartment, that half of Boston would probably kill to own…and you were trapped in it. Well, certainly until you could think of a way to un-trap yourself so to speak.
You looked back at him and decided to keep pressing your luck a little. There were things you needed, starting with the bathroom, and you were damned if you were going to let him degrade you even more than he already had by letting you piss yourself.
“There are things I’m going to need.” You spoke, taking care to keep your voice neutral, attempting to avoid outwardly displaying the desperation you were feeling “A pee and a shower for one” you gestured with your head to the small bathroom.
“Well if you’re gonna behave, I’ll undo this.” He reached down and jangled the chain that was attached to the shackle round your ankle.
“Clothes too…”
“The closet is full.” He said simply “But you have to behave, Sweetheart, or you go right back on the chain.
You grit your teeth. Sweetheart, you were no more his sweetheart than he was Harlan’s favorite grandchild. “Like I have a choice.”
“You do.” He said simply “Behave or not.”
You let out a frustrated growl “I told you I was gonna, now just undo the fucking dog collar on my ankle.”
“Ooh, so feisty.” Ransom mocked and you glared at him.
With a chuckle he stood up and pulled the key out of his pocket, undoing the shackle round your ankle and stood back slightly. You moved and shuffled to the edge of the bed where he watched as you rose to your legs. However, after the ordeal you’d been through the night before, plus your no doubt whacky blood sugar level, your head span a little and you staggered forward. Ransom caught you, both his hands hooking under your arms as he helped you steady yourself, his touch surprisingly gentle as his hands slid down to your ribs, thumbs brushing underneath your breasts and you looked at him, blinking. His action had caught you off guard and if the look on his face was anything to go by it had caught him off guard too. There was a moment where you stood still before you remembered exactly what was going on and with an angry scoff you raised both your hands, palms flat on his chest and shoved him as hard as you could.
It didn’t move him much, a half a step back or so, but it was enough to make a point. The unexpected softness on his face turned to anger and a split second later his right hand was round your throat.
“I'm warning you…” he snarled, his large fingers flexing causing his grip to tighten, around your throat. He gave a sharp squeeze, not enough to cut off your airway, instead serving as a threat, telling you he could if he wanted to. He released his grip as the tears stung your eyes and he moved aside to allow you to move to the bathroom. You went as quickly as you could and once you were there you made to shut the door.
Only there wasn’t one. “Why the fuck is there no door?” you turned and faced him.
“Because I won’t clean up a dead body.” He shrugged “So before you get any dumb ideas, anything that could make you think about a means to an end isn’t in this room either.”
You looked at him, frowning before you realised what he meant and you shook your head. “Oh trust me, I’m not about to kill myself over you.”
“Good.” He said simply, “You have 10 minutes” he said, leaning on the frame where the door should have been.
“You’re not watching me pee, Hugh!”
At that his face darkened “Call me Hugh one more time, I dare you, Sweetheart.” His voice was laced with venom as his eyes flashed dangerously, but despite all that you couldn’t help yourself. It was the only weapon you had in your arsenal to deploy.
“Hugh.” you spat, raising an eyebrow.
His jaw clenched and in two large strides he was on you, his hand grabbing your forearm as he yanked you across the bathroom, your feet skidding on the tiles as you struggled for traction on the floor. You yelled out at the pain of his grip but no sooner had it started it stopped as he flung you unceremoniously into the shower cubicle. Your knees and hip collided painfully with the tray and you gave a scream as a torrent of freezing cold water hit you, soaking your sweater dress. You gasped and spluttered, struggling to your feet, the cold making your chest contract and he looked at you, his face back to its stony calm expression.
“10 minutes” he repeated.
He turned to go and in a fit of rage you peeled the icy, sodden jersey dress off and flung it at him. It hit him square in the back before it slid to the floor, splattering on the tiles in a sopping mess. You saw him take a deep breath, his broad shoulders rippling under his thermal ribbed top as he stood up square and turned to face you as you stood, teeth chattering in the still cold spray in nothing but your bra and laddered thermal tights.
“You’re really testing my patience, Sweetheart.” He intoned darkly, before he cocked an eyebrow “9 and a half minutes.” He left the bathroom and headed into the main room, and you turned away instantly cranking up the heat on the shower. As it warmed you through, the water beating down on you, you reached for the shower gel which was on a small shelf in the corner of the cubicle. You scrubbed and scrubbed, not caring how much you used, attempting to rid yourself of the dirty feeling of him as you recalled his hands all over you, his cock violating you in the way it had. You didn’t stop the tears falling, your resolve breaking, as you turned your face into the spray, allowing it to hide your tears, before you washed your hair in the shampoo and conditioner.  Eventually, when you’d done everything you could, you turned off the water, took a deep breath and squeezed your hair out before stepping out of the shower. Your eyes instinctively went to the doorway and you were relieved. You couldn’t see Ransom, which meant he didn’t have an eye-line directly into the shower, awarding you some level of privacy at least.
You grabbed a towel which you wrapped around yourself, before you took another and used it to squeeze your hair before you pulled it back into a messy bun out of the way, and stepped out of the bathroom.
 “That was 11 minutes.” Ransom said simply as you emerged into the main area of the basement “I’ll let the 90 seconds slide.”
You glared at him as he sat in the armchair, his broad frame filling it, right leg crossed over his left, an I don't give a fuck look about his face, and you knew at that moment you had never hated anyone more in your life than you hated him right then. You turned towards the closet and began to route through, the tears filling your eyes again as you concentrated on finding something to wear. You pulled a few things out, checking the tags. Not only did the prices shock you (it was all high end, designer stuff- what else would the spoilt, trust fund prick buy) but it was all your size. Which unnerved you no end. Pushing that to the back of your mind, as after all in the situation you were in it was the least of your worries, eventually you settled on a simple pale blue cashmere sweater, and a pair of jeans.
“Underwear?” you turned and looked at him. He nodded to the drawers built into the bottom of the closet and you opened it, taking a breath. Of course it would all be lace, sexy. You picked the most modest pair of black, lace French-style briefs you could find and the matching bra, tossing the lot onto the bed. You looked at him, cocking your eyebrow and he mimicked the action, gesturing with his hand.
“Don’t mind me.” The dismay washed over you as you realised what he meant and you took a deep breath “You’re gonna sit there and watch?”
“Yup.” He replied simply, popping the p loudly.
You bowed your head, knowing there was no point turning your back on him, he’d just force you to turn round. As you stared to pat yourself dry though your towel, you blinked back the tears as for some reason this felt far more humiliating and degrading that what he’d done to you last night.
****
Ransom wasn’t sure he’d ever exercised self-control like this, he normally just bought (or took) what he wanted, and before he’d wanted nothing more than to trace the beads of water which moved down her neck and back, collecting in the towel as she rifled through the closet. She reached for the panties first, and attempted to shimmy them on under the towel and he gave a click of his tongue.
“Oh no doll.” He smirked, “lose it.”
She glared at him, and he simply held her gaze, not looking away and eventually he saw her shoulder sag as she reached up with a shaking hand and unhooked the edge of the towel which was tucked in on itself and let it fall to the floor. He gave a loud hum of approval as he took her in, her long-lithe legs up to her hips, the curve of her waist, pert breasts and delicate shoulders and collar bone. She swallowed on air and he watched her throat bob, and he instantly found himself thinking how good she’d look swallowing something else. He shifted slightly in his seat, the crotch of his jeans now feeling a little tight thanks to his semi-hard cock, and she reached for the lace briefs stepping into them. As she shimmied them up, her breasts jiggled a little and he gave an inward groan. For a second he thought about stopping her, taking her there and then but now wasn’t the time. They had things to discuss, certain rules she needed to understand.
Plus, the waiting and the anticipation would simply heighten the pleasure later when he finally did fuck her again.
He remained still as she pulled on the rest of the clothes before she turned to him, her cheeks adorably flushed.
“Hairbrush?” she asked.
Ransom nodded to the dresser opposite the bed and she moved over towards it, opening one of the drawers. She reached in and pulled the item out, dragging it through her hair before she braided it quickly and then turned to him expectantly.
“Sit.” He said, gesturing to the bed. She did as she was told, sinking down onto the edge of it, her hands clasped in her laps, fingers of her right hand pulling at the ones in her left nervously.
“Ok…” he leaned forward, his hands resting on his knees as he looked at her “Here’s how it’s gonna work.”
At his words Y/N looked at him, and then her hands released each other and she folded her arms, crossing her legs on the bed, chewing on her cheek with a sullen look on her face. The look of someone that really didn’t want to listen but had no option.
Such a petulant brat.
“You’re gonna do what I tell you, when I tell you.” Ransom spoke calmly and authoritatively “If I want you, I’m gonna have you.” At that she took a shaky breath but her eyes remained on his as he continued “You behave, you’ll get rewarded. If you don’t, you’ll be punished.”
“Punished?” she sputtered. “What could possibly be a worse punishment than this?” she waved her hand and Ransom allowed himself a chuckle.
Oh, Doll, you have no idea…
“Do you really want to know?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow up.
“No.” she said, hanging her head slightly.
“Smart move.” He nodded.
“Anything else?” she looked back at him, the defiance once more filling her features.
“Yes, don’t call me Hugh.”
At that she smirked and he felt a flash of annoyance “Sorry, am I amusing you?”
“Nope.” She shook her head quickly, the smirk fading as quick as it had appeared.
“Good.” He said, his palms slapping his thighs as he stood up.
“Is that it?”
“For now.” He nodded.
“Do I get to make any rules?”
Ransom hesitated, and looked at her. He had to hand it to her, she was gutsy but that was part of the reason she was hear after all. He shook his head, chuckling slightly “This isn’t a negotiation.”
“Can I ask you for things?”
“I just said, this isn’t a negotiation.” He started to get a little bit irked at her attitude now, “You behave, you get things.”
“So you’re gonna leave me down here with nothing? No TV, no books, no stereo?”
“Behave and I’ll think about it.” He replied simply and when she sighed he knew she understood that arguing and bargaining with him was futile.
Ransom Drysdale bargained with no one.
“You know…” he said, stepping towards the bed and she instantly took a deep breath, shying away a little. The fact he had so much power over her was exhilarating and he smiled, stopping a foot or so away from the edge of the bed, his large frame towering over her. “I should shackle you again, for your back chatting and slapping me in the back with your wet clothes but I’m fair. I’ll let that go. I hadn’t explained my rules.”
She blinked up at him and he nodded towards the bathroom. “Put your dirty stuff in the hamper. I’ll be back later.”
As he strode towards the door he could have sworn he heard her mumble something, something that sounded suspiciously like she’d called him a prick. He stopped, smirking, before he fixed a hard look on his face and turned round.
“What was that?”
“Nothing.” She said quickly
“Thought not.” He nodded, and with that he turned and left, locking the numerous bolts on the door behind him.
**** With a lack of anything else to do you cleaned up the water from the bathroom floor and tossed everything into the hamper like you’d been told to do and then, taking advantage of your new found “freedom” so to speak you set about exploring every single nook and cranny of your ‘cell’. You found the bathroom was fully stocked with all sorts of toiletries, sanitary products (fuck, you didn’t even want to think about what he was going to do to get his sordid little kicks when Aunt Flow came to visit in 3 weeks or so), there was a little make up as well in the drawer in the vanity unit that you’d spotted before and you pulled it out to examine it, once again finding it to be not your usual brand but high end all the same. Finding all this was only compounding your confusion as to what the hell his goal was in all this, but as you had realised before until he decided to show you those cards, you would simply be playing a guessing game.
In the drawers under your bed you found a few different sets of linen which was a relief as it meant you weren’t going to be at his mercy as to when you could change your bedding. Given what had happened the night before, you were half tempted to change them again but you hesitated and decided to wait until later, because you had a sinking feeling he was going to take you again, especially given his declaration earlier.
“If I want you, I’m gonna have you.”
If that was how your life was going to go for the foreseeable, you’d be going through a hell of a lot of bedding if you changed it every time he fucked you. Much more than was contained in the drawers anyway.
Pushing that horrible thought from your head, you took a deep breath, focussing on staying calm, staying collected, staying alive. She needed her wits, her strength, her continued ability of self preservation. And, given the fact that he's murdered before, you weren't entirely trusting his word of not wanting to kill you. You closed the drawers and then settled yourself down on the floor at the side of the bed nearest the arm chair and low coffee table indulging in a few yoga stretches and the like in an attempt to ease out your still aching muscles. You were sat on the floor, with your legs extended, reaching for your toes when he came back and with a little smirk on his face handed you a book.
“For the boredom.”
You blinked and then took it from him, shaking your head as you realised it was one of his granddads, most likely his idea of a joke. And what was more it was one you’d already read.
Nevertheless, not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, you thanked him and then stood up and dropped into the chair, opening the cover. How long had passed you had no idea, but you were a good few chapters on when the trust fund ass wipe re-emerged, and the smell of food wafted across the room. He set a tray down on the bed and jerked his head towards it, in a silent instruction for you to vacate the seat. With a roll of your eyes you tried to get comfortable on the bed to eat with said tray balanced on your knee and with an exasperated groan you looked at him.
“Is there any chance of getting some form of table and chair so I can eat off it and not where I’m expected to sleep?”
He looked at you for a second, before he shrugged “I’ll think about it, depending on how you behave.”
The chicken was dry, but you ate it anyway, remembering your earlier thoughts about staying strong. As you chewed you watched him where he sat in the chair in the corner of the room, looking at something on his phone. Having had time to think things over even more, you knew you needed to play this clever, get him on your side, let him believe that you could be trusted if you wanted to stand any chance of getting out of here. With a deep breath you supressed the desire you had to simply remain silent, sullen even and spoke.
“Are you not eating?” you asked him and he looked at you, surprise on his face.
“I had a big lunch.” He responded simply.
“Well I hope it was better than this.” You arranged your face into the best playful look you could muster “Because, no offence, it sucks.”
Ransom looked at you, before he snorted “Yeah, cooking isn’t my forte.”
“Maybe I could do it.” You offered “I’m not a bad chef.”
His eyes locked on yours and you concentrated on keeping the look on your face innocent as he studied you. Eventually he spoke again “Maybe. If you behave.”
Again, the focus on your behaviour. He clearly wanted you to be good, compliant maybe. Bolstered by the slight progress you were making into maybe understanding what you needed to do you continued. “So, did you go anywhere nice? For lunch I mean.”
“The Harbor.” He responded “Food was good, company was slightly irritating.”
“Company?” the surprise in your tone was genuine
“I met my mother.”
“Oh.” You replied, looking back down at the plate as you blinked back the tears, the thought of your own mother filling your head. She would be beside herself now. You took a deep breath, you might be able to be compliant but you were damned if you were going to show him any weakness, that’s what he wanted. Instead, you took another bite of your meal and looked up at him. “That must have been nice for you.”
“Is that sarcasm?” Ransom asked in an amused tone and you rolled your eyes.
“No, I was being serious. Mind you, you don’t strike me as being close to your family so…” you shrugged and shovelled a soggy piece of broccoli into your mouth.
“You’re smart, we're not.” He shrugged “But she wanted to know how I was getting on.”
“Bet that conversation was positively riveting.” You smirked “And that was sarcasm by the way.”
Ransom scoffed “It wasn’t bad to be honest, that was until she steered it around to Marta.”
“Marta?” you frowned, pondering what on earth could have brought their conversation around to that. “Why did you talk about her?”
“What is this Jeopardy?” he arched an eyebrow at you and you rolled your eyes. “Why not, I'll take Drysdale family politics for my share of the inheritance, Alec…”
“Watch your mouth, Sweetheart.” His tone was warning and his face stony. You swallowed and looked down at the plate.
“Sorry.” You said, keeping up your act. Silence fell again and you finished the last of your dinner and set the tray on the nightstand.
Ransom took a deep breath “Seeing as you’re so interested, Marta has approached my mother and the family about holding a memorial for Harlan.” You looked at him, and his eyebrows raised. “Ironic huh, the bitch who stole what was mine is planning a memorial for my grandad when she’s responsible for his death.”
At that you scoffed, he really was unbelievable and just like that your resolve to be nice started to ebb away at his utter narcissism “Are you for real? You’re responsible for Harlan’s death, and as for taking what was yours, you never had anything, none of you did! It was Harlan’s, you didn’t earn it.” Ransom glowered at you but you continued, shaking your head with a derisive laugh. “You know, the fact he would rather leave it to his nurse than his own family says more about you all than it does about her."
“What did you just say?” His voice was low, and there was an unmistakable flash of anger on his face.
“You heard me. Not that I expect any of that to bother you, Hugh, you do and take what you want anyway and fuck whoever gets hurt in the crossfire…” at that you gestured around the room, “prime example…”
There was a pause and in an instance you realised your mistake. You’d called him inadequate and worse, had broken one of those fucking rules, called him Hugh. His whole demeanour had changed, he was pissed. His jaw was set, his eyes dark, his entire body rigid.
Shit.
In a flash he was off the chair. You reacted equally as quick, jumping off the bed in an attempt to put some distance in between you. Why, you had no idea, it wasn’t like you were going to stop him, but maybe if you could buy some time you could talk him down as you backed toward the door. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…” but your apology was cut off as he rounded the bed, grabbing your hair painfully, yanking your braid down so your head was tilted back, looking at him. You let out a scream of pain and moved your hands to grab at his wrists “Oww, shit…you’re hurting me!”
“Like I care.” He snarled “Now, we can do this the easy way or the hard way.”
That predatory look was back on his face and you knew you were in for it again, and your apologetic front flew completely from your mind. Like hell you were doing this without a fight.
“Fuck you.” You spat back.
“Hard way it is.” He shrugged.
His hand tightening around your hair, he manhandled you into the middle of the bed easily. You yelled, bucked, lashed out but as with the previous night you were simply no match for him. He easily pinned you down with his knees clamped either side of your hips, holding you in place as he yanked your sweater over your head, pulling it down your arms so they were pinned behind you back. It was uncomfortable but did the job perfectly you realised to your horror, because you couldn’t move your arms at all.
Ransom then moved, his large hands grabbing at the button on your waistband and you continued to struggle, trying to buck your hips but once more to no avail. He had your jeans and panties down to your knees easily, before he flipped you over so your face was pushed into the pillow where it muffled your screams slightly. 
One hand reached up, sliding round the front of your neck and he squeezed. This time it was harder than he had done earlier that day, and the pressure increased and increased, slowly shutting off your airway. You gasped, tears stinging in your eye as you desperately tried to move but it was pointless. Then, suddenly he eased off, and you drew in a harsh gasp of air, coughing and spluttering, still conscious that his fingers remained around your throat.
“Stop fighting it.” He instructed, his other hand sliding over your entrance, making you pull away from his touch, but to no avail as the hand that was on your throat slid down your spine and twisted the sweater, tightening your make shift restraints, jerking your arms even further behind your back. Your upper arms and shoulders screamed in protest and you let out a little sob of pain as he moved both his hands to your hips, tugging them up slightly. One hand trailed over your ass before he plunged two fingers into you and you jerked forward at the intrusion. Ransom groaned before he leaned over, his lips brushing your ear. “I can feel you. Your body doesn’t lie, Sweetheart.”
You turned your head away, pressing your cheek into the pillow and Ransom uncurled himself from over you and you felt him shift behind you. The tell-tale clanking of a belt buckle, followed by a zip and the rustling of fabric told you exactly what was coming. Despite your resolve to give him nothing, a choked whimper escaped your mouth and you turned you face, pressing it further into the pillow in an attempt to stifle your sobs.
“Oh no…” he said, one hand curling into your braid, yanking hard and jerking your head back. You cried out, your body was contorted in such an unnatural shape, back arched, arms pinned behind your spine, head jerked back. “I wanna hear you.”
He shuffled a little, and you felt the top of his cock teasing your entrance and then without warning he powered forward, stuffing you full, letting out a rumble of a growl as he did so.
“So fucking tight…” he grit out as he withdrew, then plunged straight back in, jerking your body as he did so. He took a few more deep, slow thrusts before he picked up the pace and began to piston into you, relentlessly. You felt each thrust, the slap of his balls slamming towards your clit. It hurt, just as it had done last time. He had zero self-control, grunting and growling as he bottomed out with every motion. The hand that was gripping your hip went beyond bruising, his dull nails biting at your skin as the other wound tighter around your braid, the odd angle of your body gritting at your joints. You were fighting tears and sobs as your body continued to betray you, soaking your walls, allowing his cock to slide in and out effortlessly. The hand against your hip glided along your side as a deep thrust came and you could feel it grip your breast between the mattress. His thumb brushing against your nipple through your bra. The friction of his piston thrusts, his hand forcing your bralete against your nipples and the yank of your hair was driving your body into sensory overload and filled you with burning sensations that verged on painful. The tip of his cock scrapped at your insides, no doubt bruising you. Your tears burned and your throat begged with dry thirst.
“Can feel you, Sweetheart…” he groaned, as he bottomed out, rotating his hips slightly making you cry out involuntarily “You feel close…you sound close…such a needy little slut.”
“I’m not a slut…” you sob, the feeble protest sounding as pathetic as you felt.
"Fucking look like one to me..." he growled, his hips rotating again, the burn in your stomach was now getting to hard to ignore. “Please…” you begged, “Just….stop…”
He answered your plea by driving deeper into you, picking up his pace once more and you felt yourself beginning to tumble.
"Oh God," the words flew from your mouth as your body shook violently and you took on your overload of orgasm and sensory extremes. You sobbed as your body betrayed you again with this man. Your mind screaming for understanding, your insides begging for more.
“Fuck…Sweetheart…” Ransom let out a groan as he picked up the pace, before after a few more deep thrusts, the hand that was holding your hair let go. Your head fell forward as you felt the warm ribbons of his come streak up your back before he released his hold on your hip and you collapsed onto the bed, your heart and self-respect shattered.
Every inch of your body ached thanks to the way you’d been contorted and as you lay still, trying to regain some control of your limbs you felt his hands press either side of your head and gave a sob as he leaned lean over your body, his ears brushing your lips.
“I'll take you like that every fucking day if I have to until you give in. Because you will.”
At that the feel of his chest that had been pressing into your back was gone and you heard a rustle of clothing and then footsteps across the floor before the door opened and his deep baritone filled the room once more.
“I would shackle you but I don’t think we need that anymore. You’re not going anywhere.” His tone was almost playful, like he was toying with you, teasing you. “I suggest you take a bath, you’re gonna be sore. That is, once you manage to work your way out of that sweater.”
And with a click followed by the familiar sliding of bolts you were sealed in your prison and you finally gave in to your tears as the sheer helplessness of your situation crashed over you in waves.
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sunsetsintandem · 4 years
Text
TUA Thanksgiving Headcanons (Domestic Hargreeves #1)
It's their first Thanksgiving back home as a family. No apocalypses, screwed up timelines or assassins behind their backs + 1 ex-dead brother and the girl whose mother threatened to kill them all. Overall, could be worse.
It gets better instead.
For instance, Patrick had suggested they spend Thanksgiving together, and Allison had jumped at the opportunity to have Claire meet her uncles and aunts.
It would figure, though, that between 8 emotionally stunted adults raised by morally incompetent parents, only one of them knew about the holiday.
Knew, loosely, because Allison had mostly follow her in-laws instructions and her Hollywood friends' advices. So really, they were all at a disadvantage.
But hey, that's what Google's for.
They set everything up a week before Thanksgiving.
Diego still ends up forgetting the turkey, and he and Luther stumble their way through 8 different stores the morning of.
"Can't we just replace it with a chicken? I don't think we've ever had turkey. "
Klaus is surprisingly capable in the kitchen.
"Are those pies? Since when can you bake?"
Bakers and chefs are good with their hands (which wasn't suppose to be dirty, goodness, Allison, get your head out of the gutter) although, for some reason, they always tried to Hansel and Gretel-ed him (it's because you are built like a twig, Klaus; you activate my fight or flight response).
Allison and Klaus aren't too worried about Ben and Lila helping out.
Until Allison catches them measuring an obscene amount of sugar, and she is violently reminded that Ben has a sweet tooth, and the ex-Sparrow version of him was not different on that regard.
Vanya, maker of peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches, is appalled.
Five does not cackled at watching two physical adults wallow in self-pity at the dinner table.
He also doesn't offer any help, but he still taste tests Allison's dishes, and blinks to the supermarket for whatever forgotten ingredient Vanya had asked to retrieve.
And then, he finds Diego and Luther wrestling an older woman for the last turkey. He records the whole thing.
When he returns, breath hitched and face pulled, his siblings are easily worried.
He shows them the video.
Suffice to say they end up having a 45 minute impromptu break. They don't tell 1&2 of their new development.
Vanya's mostly relegated to more "simple" dishes like mashed potatoes and roasting veggies, not that she's complaining, specially after the monster thing Diego and Luther brought back home (That doesn't even look like a bird!)
Allison lets Lila cut the "turkey" for fun.
"Ally, I love you, but have you considered replacing that thing with... I don't know... tofu?"
"At this point, I might."
Klaus teaches Ben how to make stuffing. It takes them three tries to get it right, none of them speak about the first two attempts.
Five saves those dishes because they are still good, and they can't be worse than an expired Twinkie (He hopes).
Somehow, by the time the bell rings, they are all done.
Claire barrels in, straight into Luther's arms. "Spaceboy! Spaceboy!" If he tears up, yes, he did.
Claire loves Luther from the getaway, even if he is a little awkward. She immediately asks him about space and the moon, and throws in some things she learned in school.
Patrick is understandably worried about what's going to happen in the next 3 days (A whole weekend! They are staying a whole weekend!) which in turn makes Allison anxious.
It doesn't get better once Klaus steers Patrick away from them. She is half-tempted to follow, but then Claire tugs at her sleeve.
Lila and Claire get unsurprisingly well. Lila braids her hair, teaches her some cool moves, none of which involves a lethal weapon. Allison is grateful.
When the family makes their way back to the kitchen, she isn't expecting Klaus and Patrick cracking up like a pair of madmen.
There's no alcohol in the table, not even on the sink.
"I guess this is something we can be grateful for."
"Vanya, I think our brother broke my ex."
They stuffed themselves full. Ben had claimed an entire pumpkin pie by himself, and Vanya, sweet little Vanya, had almost fought him for it.
10 minutes after Luther had taken the first bite of the turkey, the rest of them eventually picked some up (He never thought one day he would be relegated to meal taster, but there they were).
Diego had attempted to cut mashed potatoes with his knives because he missed them.
Unthinkingly, they had left an open space for Pogo and Mom, as if they were both coming down at any given point.
They have a sleep over, Diego, Ben and Five building the world's biggest blanket fort for all of them.
And even though there's plenty of space left, they cuddle next to each other, pointy limbs and tickling hair. Ben settles down with a book, reading it loudly for Claire, Diego pressed at his side, and Lila draped over both of them.
Generally speaking, Five doesn't like to be touched, but if he curls up at Klaus' side because his brother has vivid nightmares and Five is the lightest sleeper of them, no one has to point it out (maybe it's just because he's feeling soft, and Klaus is the less likely to question him about any sort of physical manifestation of affection Five is willing to throw out).
Luther can't reach all of them, but he tries. He ends up just hugging Vanya and Allison, though.
It's good enough.
For their first Thanksgiving back, Allison thinks it's a success.
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buck-nialled · 3 years
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Undertow - S. Mendes (VII)
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Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 // Chapter 3 // Chapter 4 // Chapter 5 // Chapter 6 // Undertow Character Quiz
CH VII: Not So Casual Confessions
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Wesley’s voice was barely heard as Shawn finally bellowed a plea.
“B-because I love her, okay? I love Y/N!” Every person stood in the cove stilled for an uncertain amount of time. “The day I met her was the same day I was basically banned from the sea for who knows how long and she saved my life. Maybe that was the universe’s way of bringing the ocean to me so I wouldn’t go insane, I don’t know.” Shawn lets an unamused laugh escape, as does Y/N. Hers goes unnoticed by Merlin and Ripley--especially Ripley--as they become captivated by his response.
“But...she made me realize I couldn’t care less if my life was on land or in water, just as long as she is in it. So, you can leave me dead here for all I care. Do whatever you’re gonna do to try and get answers, but don’t expect me to give you anything.” His eyes flicker down to Sandy, still in the viscous grip of his owner. Slowly, Ripley loosens his tight fist around the slimy tube of its body before the eel is flopping to the ground and slithering back into the waters.
“You...love her? A human loves an Atlantean?”
“Yes,” Shawn groans as a painful tremor sweeps through his abdomen. “Why is that so hard to believe?”
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Ripley’s body resembled a beached animal from how eagerly he surged onto the sandy beaches of Hawaii. After reviewing Atlantean history today at Abyssington High and discovering the original plans to venture to the surface and make relationships with Homo sapiens, the urge he had attempted to fight for eighteen months finally motivated Ripley’s legs to carry himself onto land. Of course, he grew up knowing this type of action was forbidden amongst all sea folk and considered treason. If caught venturing to shore by anybody under the surface, he could be charged and sentenced to a life behind bars in the most shameful location and under the highest security--the King’s dungeon.
How Ripley discovered interest in land walker culture? Well, the story isn’t quite a nail-biter. One day while swimming towards the shallower ends of the sea, a sinking brick caught his eye. After swimming towards it and examining the material, he concluded it was not those plastic rings most turtles get tied around their fins, nor the transparent shrapnel he had been warned to keep away from in fear of being sliced to bits. It was a tough piece of plank with thinly sliced papers in between, each holding various names and places. After skimming through each page with lit eyes and enamor for his new discovery, Ripley flipped back to the plank at the front to read the large word staring back at him.
“Encyclopedia.”
It was the only treasure of his that he decided to sneak up to the surface with. The book was far too heavy for him to add anything else to the load. After surging himself to the surface, he finds the famous, red landmark staring back at him. It was one which he had meticulously mapped and been swimming to for weeks. A sight which he could never grow tired of. Even it’s picture, filed under the letter ’G’ made his heart lurch for a change of scenery whenever he perused it. Staring before the real thing in front of him and knowing at one point he could be standing on it looking down at the home he had left made his heart start matching the beat of an erratic kick drum.
When he marched onto land for the first time, feeling his feet sink into dirt which was dry, Ripley was appalled at the fact that this was still the same planet. He continued in one direction, not exactly sure what to do now or where his unmarked destination would be. Finally, he shoved his way through trees and stumbled onto a square of cement. Seconds later, his entire body was vulnerable lying atop it.
“Oh my god! I’m so sorry!” Ripley’s eyes fluttered open and he brought a hand to his forming concussion. A young woman, no older than him and adorning a vibrant tracksuit halter her jogging on the pavement and leaned down to inspect him for any superficial injuries. Her eyes were shaped like almonds and held the most gorgeous jade color. It’s hue was incomparable to the coral reefs he had been witness to for the last eighteen years. And he thinks it’s his new favorite sight above the Golden Gate Bridge.
“Are you alright?” With the guidance of her soft hand, Ripley shimmied himself into a sitting position and brought up his arm, which was suffering a light stinging sensation. “I’m leaking ...red.”
The girl before him snorts out a laugh, “you’re bleeding. And you’re soaking wet. Where did you come from?” Blinking at her a couple of times, Ripley fully stands up and turns to study the progress he has made on his journey so far. Lazily, he points to the red, steel ladders native to those in San Francisco and she inhales a sharp breath through the nose.
“You jumped?”
“No.” He looks at her. “I swam.”
Furrowing her brows, she nearly scoffs in disbelief at the story of this man slowly unraveling before her. Nevertheless, she remained intrigued and asks, “what’s your name?”
“Ripley.”
“Well, Ripley, I happen to live a few blocks down and own a dryer and some bandages if you’d like to come with.”
“Okay.” He nods, cueing the two to begin their walk back to her home. “What’s a dryer?” He asks, turning to her. And though she should have been concerned for how hard of a fall the man had taken, she elicits a string of giggles without further thought.
“You have a lot of explaining to do when we get back.”
And when they did get back, Ripley did not know what to say. Though it was nice leaving his home to discover a new one named San Francisco, a part of him still remained allegiant to his loved one’s below the surface.
“I can’t really remember much.” Is the excuse he gave. He hoped the questions would end there, but to his dismay, Stephanie continued her interrogation.
“What’s with the book.” She arched an eyebrow, pointing a finger down at the encyclopedia still in his grip. He opened it up, being careful when flipping each wilted page before coming across the landmark he was basking in the sight of not too long ago.
“I wanted to come here. And see it.” Humming, Stephanie nods and reaches a hand toward the book.
“May I?” Ripley nods, relinquishing the book over to her hold and letting her flip through the pages as she pleased.
“One day, when I become a marine biologist and get rich...this is where I’m going.” She turned the book towards Ripley, allowing his eyes to scan the picture in all of its beauty. The setting sun highlighting the sand and bouncing off of people’s glowing skin. The palm trees casting the perfect shade and shaking in the breeze made Ripley want to take Stephanie and swim with her straight there.
“Where is this?” His finger darted out to trace over the photo, as Stephanie read the title of the section.
“Hawaii.” The word sounded like a symphony when it bounced off of her tongue. It felt like Ripley’s insides were rolling down a hill of lush green grass and never wanted to stop.
“Let’s go.”
“Ripley, you can’t just up and leave like that. I mean, you probably have a life and family here…” she begins objecting.
“I wanna go wherever you go.” She turns from the hypnotizing photo of Hawaii’s sunset to his aqua blue eyes, just as mesmerizing. A smile creeps onto her lips, and suddenly, the word “no” seems displeasing to say. So instead she answers with an optimistic,
“Okay.”
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“It’s not,” Ripley says, but is startled as another voice joins him in sync. This cues the man to turn, along with Merlin and come face to face with the wanted runaway.
“You were right, Rip.” Merlin elicits a string of menacing chuckles and administers a clap of his hand against his friend’s back. “She swam right after him.” But Ripley’s eyes were already transfixed elsewhere. Specifically, on his stunned child.
“Wesley...I--”
“Dad, what the hell are you doing?” The young man bustled past both of the knights to find his past competitor twitching and curling into himself against the stone floor.
“I...I don’t know, son. It was never meant to go this far--”
“You nearly killed him, dad! God, and for what? What were you going to get out of this?” Wesley ripped mercilessly at the seaweed keeping Shawn’s hands captive.
Ripley repeated his son’s question over and over to himself. No logical answer came up other than saving himself and his family.
“I was trying to protect you--”
“Protect me?” he scoffs. “By kidnapping and beating one of my friends? If you really cared about protecting me, you would actually tell me why you’re always leaving and where you’re going to. You would stay behind and actually ask me how me and mom have been since you’ve left us for some job we don’t even know anything about! More importantly, you would have told me about this!” Wesley retrieves his phone from his pocket, turning the screen towards his father.
Silence passed among the group for a few seconds, before Merlin took the initiative to lean towards Ripley and whisper to him, “You see a black screen too, right?”
“Uh . . . Wesley . . .” Y/N says, glowering her eyes at the boy. Humming, he turns the phone around for himself and gasps. Droplets of water were the only evidence as to what caused the unresponsive device.
“Huh? Oh no, no…” He pats the electronic against his hand, persistently pressing the power button in hopes of some illumination on the screen. His endeavor was fruitless, however, and left the boy sighing in despair. “I knew I should have gotten the warranty.”
“It was a map of the kingdom,” Y/N grumbles beside Ripley. “Not that it really matters anymore.”
“So what are you gonna do now? Take me in?” she asks, turning her stare from Ripley to Merlin. She tries to ignore Shawn’s eyes burning into her profile with dread for what was to come. She just hopes to have one last moment of staring into the hazel rings of his and maybe having her choke her--or kiss her, she is still confused on which was supposed to occur--before she is sentenced to life beneath the water forever.
“Yep.” Merlin smiles proudly to himself.
“No,” says Ripley, earning a hawk from everybody in the room.
“What?” His fellow knight stands beside him, baffled.
“What? I mean—“ Y/N clears her throat. “That’s right you’re not. Now, let Shawn free and we’ll all return back to land,” she commands in an authoritative voice, setting her hands against her hips Shawn’s hands could not wait to squeeze when he finally got the chance to hug her.
“Rip…” Merlin stops him with a hand against his forearm. “What are you doing?”
But Ripley ignores it, absorbing the sight before him. His son finished unraveling all of the seaweed that restrained Shawn’s hands earlier. Y/N approached him cautiously, and bent down to her knees to study the inflictions left on the boy’s skin from Sandy. Shawn tries not to concentrate on his new wounds, and rather, begins rattling compliments toward the woman in front of him.
“That-that dress looks nice on you,” he gulps.
A grin climbs onto her face upon the sight of Shawn’s red cheeks. “I think you already told me that earlier.”
“Well, I’m still right,” he claims through shaky chuckles.
“Eh,” She shrugs, staring down at the floral-patterned fabric. “I think I prefer your hoodie.” A snort comes from Shawn.
He retorts, “I think I’d prefer that thing in the garbage. It probably smelled awful when I gave it to you. And it’s covered in stains and...blegh.” He stiffens when Y/N’s warm hand is pressed against one of his cheeks, which now feels as though it is burning.
“I think I’d prefer you...and your brown eyes...and more of those…”
“Moments?” Shawn offers with a quirk of his eyebrow.
“Yeah, definitely more of those.” She grins, before the unfortunate moment the two shared earlier came to mind. “I’m sorry about what I said...you were right. Getting anywhere close to the water was a mistake.”
“No, I’m sorry. I mean, this is your home for crying out loud. I couldn’t ask you to just abandon it overnight...especially when you make a damn good lifeguard.” His hand reaches to guide a wet tendril behind Y/N’s ear.
“This isn’t my home, Shawn. My home is here, in Hawaii, with cheeseballs and shopping trips with Aaliyah and seafood nights...and you.”
“And Connor.” Shawn adds, earning a chuckle from the girl before him.
“And Connor.” She repeats.
“And Wesley.” The boy straggling behind them coughs, before turning to admire the stone surrounding them.
“And Wesley...but mostly you.” Watching the two lovesick strangers from afar was like staring into a portal from his past. The sight brought proud tears to Ripley’s eyes, despite his attempts to keep his emotions at bay.
“You know that it’s our lives on the line if you let her go,” Merlin states bitterly through his teeth. Ripley’s eyes shine with pride at the scene of Wesley now surveying the cove for the first time, with the two love struck young adults exploring one another’s eyes only a few feet away.
“I know.”
“I’m gonna make sure no one else is coming,” Merlin says. Ripley merely hums, too lost in the moment to be bothered by the knight’s complaints. Merlin glances at Shawn and Y/N, remembering his mission. He slowly walks to the edge of the cove, keeping his eyes on Wesley, who crouched down on a rock and staring at the distant shoreline. With one last breath he slipped into the water, swimming back to Atlantis a fast as he could.
Wesley ran his hand across the top of the water, paying attention to nothing but the ripples he was creating. He felt oddly calm considering how chaotic the past hour had been.
“You know,” Y/N said as she came up behind him. “this is where Shawn and I first met.”
“Really?” Wesley asked. “Was it a ‘meet cute?’”
“I don’t know what that means, but sure,” Y/N chuckled.
“Either way, he definitely likes you.”
“Gee, I wonder where you got that idea from.”
“Just in case you weren’t 100 percent sure.” He turned his head to look at her, offering a small smile.
“Okay, well the fate of humanity depends on us getting to work so I need to explain the plan and get going so you guys can get back to shore.” She nudged his hip and nodded back to Ripley and Shawn, who seemed to take no shame in maintaining their distance.
Wesley grunted as he stood up. “What do you mean ‘you go down and we go back to shore?’”
“We saved Shawn but we didn’t stop the tsunami,” Y/N stated matter of factly. “I have to go down there to finish this.”
“You can’t go down there alone.”
“Why not? That’s the plan.” She turned back towards Shawn and Ripley, feeling like the area was emptier than it was when she first showed up.
“No, the plan was for us to all go down there and finish this off together,” Wesley snapped, drawing Y/N’s attention back to him.
“It’s way too dangerous for you and Shawn to go. You don’t have a map and you didn’t memorize it earlier so there’s no chance I’m letting you come with me.”
“I don’t want you going down there alone.”
“You’re not my father. You don’t get to make that choice for me!” The raise of her voice caught Shawn’s attention. He furrowed his eyebrows at what he was witnessing, still not sure as to what was going on and why he was in the cove again.
“But I’m your friend, Y/N! And as your friend, I care about you and I don’t want you shoving yourself into dagner just ‘cause!”
“I don’t think you understand the gravity of this situation, Wesley.”
“What is going on over here?” Shawn asked as he approached the two, a cautious arm slung over the front of his abdomen while he attempted steady footsteps. RIpley, still feeling a weight of guilt sunken like an anchor in the pit of his stomach from his earlier actions, maintains distance but is still in earshot.
“Y/N’s throwing herself into the face of danger like it’s nothing and we’re not allowed to come with her.” Wesley threw his arm out in frustration, letting it fall to his side with a smack.
“Y/N?” Shawn said her name with hesitance. “Is that true?”
“This tsunami isn’t going to stop itself and you guys won’t make it out alive if you come with me.”
“What do you mean ‘go down there’? What in the world is going on right now?”
“Oh my gosh, how many times do I have to explain this?” Y/N groaned with a roll of her eyes.
“It’s only been one time so far,” Wesley muttered, earning a shove and glare from Shawn.
“There’s a tsunami. It was a distraction so they could kidnap you. I have to go to Atlantis to stop it. You guys are gonna go back to shore. End of story.”
“That is definitely not the end of the story.”
“Wesley, I swear I am going to feed you to the dolphins if you don’t shut up.” Before Wesley could even protest, a few disapproving cries came from Douglas and his pod.
“Oh, you’ve eaten worse.” Y/N turns her head, sharpening her glare at the bottle noses.
“No, wait...say that again,” Ripley directs, now with wide eyes. He walks closer to the group of dolphins, still bobbing in the waters leading onto the rocky platform of the cove. As instructed, Douglas and the others repeat the same series of chirps. Simultaneously, Y/N and Ripley bothe elicit petrified gasps.
Wesley and Shawn stood beside another, watching the scene unfold before them with a feeling of trepidation blossoming inside of both of them. “Do you understand what’s happening?” Wesley whispers into Shawn’s ear.
“Not a clue,” Shawn replies in a similar, hushed tone.
“Merlin went to the king to share our location, that’s what’s happening. We need to leave, now,” she says to Ripley, who confirms her order with a nod. “Douglas, get Shawn and Wesley back to shore.”
“What? No. Did you not just hear me say ‘this is not the end of the story’?” Wesley cries, before a loud clap of a crashing wave makes the group collectively flinch. Slowly, the tide began rising higher and higher, ultimately beginning to fill the cove to the top of its coarse walls.
“I think somebody heard you,” Shawn remarks--but his voice is nearly drowned by another harsh wave against the cove’s exterior. He is now fretful as his feet, once planted to the platform, are now hovering over it as he tried to keep his head above water. The dolphins began overlapping in their clicks and squeals.
“It’s the king,” Ripley begins. “He’s gonna fill this cave up to the brim.” He and Y/N, too began bobbing up and down as the water began a drastic rise.
“Well, you two can breathe underwater so what’s the big...ohhh…” Wesley shares a sheepish look with the three.
“Maybe if we swim out he’ll stop,” Y/N suggests.
“What? No, you two are not going out there. Do you know what he’ll do to you?” Shawn asks.
“Do you not realize what he’s doing to you two right now? You’re both forty seconds away from holding your breath for who knows how long—“
“Seven minutes,” Wesley interjects.
“It doesn’t matter,” Ripley and Y/N reply in sync.
“Seven minutes? Dude that’s impressive,” says Shawn, slightly envious. He looks back to Y/N and Ripley, both giving him a look of disdain.
Shawn clears his throat, “Sorry.”
“You’ll still both be dead in minutes. This current is too strong for you two to push through, remember? There’s no other option…” Once again, she turns back to Douglas, who is already awaiting for further instruction.
“Douglas, take them back to shore, please.” Douglas alerts the others of his clan,. Swiftly, the rubbery grey bodies are seen swooping Shawn and Wesley out of the cove as fast as their fins could carry them, not even leaving time for the two boys to protest.
“Are you ready?” She shares what may be a final look with her ex-nemesis, and is somewhat grateful for him now being an ally.
“You kidding? I’ve been waiting for twenty-three years.” The rising water finally fulfills its duty in submerging the two Atlanteans in the deep blue. Their eyes bore deep into one another’s, illuminating a near identical aqua.
“Let’s do this.”
The two surge out into the deep, barely feeling the coral and other bottom-dwellers graze their feet as they journey a reasonable distance from the cove. Precocious, the two scan their surroundings for any threat which could be headed their way. Alas, they were met with relatively clear waters, other than a few finned friends swimming past them without care.
“I don’t understand, where’s the--” before she could finish her question, Y/N’s temple was met with a brutal force that knocked her to the sea floor. Groaning, her eyelids fluttered open and she endured a throbbing feeling on the side of her skull while witnessing the sight of Ripley, already put under beside her. A looming shadow draws her stare up, and she elicits another groan at the sight of its gaping mouth and filtering gils, swimming in circles above her.
“Hammerheads.” She murmurs in distaste, before her new head trauma lulls her into unconsciousness.
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seokstrivia · 5 years
Text
Euphoria | jjk
❥ Summary; There was always a sign on Jungkooks’ door that said something along the lines of, ‘Warning; I am naked in here. Do not enter unless you're ready to see a whole lot of dick.’   
or, that one roommate au where Jungkook is a cocky bastard.
❥ Roommate!AU | M.list | word count; 7.6k
❥ Jeon Jungkook x Reader; angst, douche Jungkook, enemies to lovers, fluff, mutual pining, slow burn, smut, he’s actually a softie
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» He, him, his «
Jungkook was, how you say, a dick. A dick you despised and wanted unquestionably nothing to do with. And yes, you did always hate him, without reason, but hated from the beginning nonetheless.
It all began when you moved into the accommodation for college, your mom helped you unpack then kissed you goodbye, and everything was fine— for five minutes.
Dickwad, also known as, Dickhead and maybe sometimes, douchebag, sauntered into the flat with music blaring out of his, lovely friends’, speaker.
Lovely friend, aka Park Jimin, is, and always will be, an absolute darling you doted on without fail.
Anyways, when Jungkook stepped into the flat as if he owned the damn place, the first thing he did was throw a wink your way and then proceed to claim his bedroom— the very bedroom you claimed first.
Obviously, it was an absolutely ridiculous point to bicker over, but you’d lost it as soon as he called you babe, followed by a prissy princess, to end his absurd argument.
You were absolutely fuming by this point, and the heavy music resonating throughout the flat gave you the biggest headache you’d ever experienced in all the years you’d been alive.
That was when you wordlessly declared your hatred for him. When you decided you were going to make his life a living hell, and when you decided you were going to store lego in his room— just so he could undergo the pain you had to go through.
It wasn’t even good music.
Ever since then, you’ve never liked Jungkook, never wanted anything to do with him and cursed him in your dreams every night— which didn’t seem to work, you definitely needed to purchase a voodoo doll.
» His Friday night «
A yawn parted your lips as you zoned in and out, you were currently attempting to do your homework, but Jungkook— the devils incarnate— was being as loud and intolerable as usual.
He had been on the phone to one of his friends, talking about a party he absolutely had to go to. But it wasn’t unusual, Jungkook made it his priority to go out partying every Friday night, more so, to end up in someone's bed.
The thought itself had you shaking your head in distaste— like a mother disapproving her sons' grades or overall behaviour.
It had a sigh leaving your lips.
Jungkook stepped out of his room in all black: black jeans, black t-shirt, black leather jacket, and to finish off the look, a black cap.
You would be lying if you said he didn’t look good, but that was something that would never leave your lips. He didn’t deserve to know. You cursed yourself for even thinking it.
“I take it you’ll be stuck inside studying like the nerd you are,” Jungkook snorted.
There was a horrible, eye-wrenching smirk on his awful face. Who did this thing think he was?
“At least I’m not sleeping around and giving people aids.”
He jeered in return, a scowl on his face while he pierced into your soul, and presumably, set it alight.
God, you were infuriating.
Jungkook left that night without another word, he didn’t have time to sit and argue with you— which you were extremely thankful for because you were far too stressed to even think about him.
Another sigh broke your lips as your focus fell back on to your textbook. You were failing one of your classes— a class you needed to pass in order to complete the year, however, you didn’t understand anything your lecture taught you.
And what annoyed you, even more, was that Jeon Jungkook, who didn’t attend any of the classes, was passing with flying colours. If anything, your nightly curses were probably backfiring on to you.
You groaned. Life was not being fair. Not at all.
» His banana milk «
Jungkook was annoyed, more than that, he was angry and about to throw the biggest fit at the age of 21.
Yes, it’d really come to this.
His banana milk was missing, no matter how many times he checked the fridge, it wasn’t there. He bought that with his own money.
You stepped out of your bedroom, a chewed up straw perched in your mouth as you continued to scroll through your phone.
All the studying made you feel a bit peckish.
But you couldn’t exactly reach the fridge, or even step into the kitchen, since Jungkook was blocking the way with his oversized muscles.
He took the straw out of your mouth, thoroughly examining it before glaring into your eyes with his fiery red ones— yes, they were actually red. It’s not an exaggeration.
“Can I help you?” You asked in a monotone.
He grumbled under his breath, tossing the straw aside and crossing his arms over his chest.
“Did you drink all of my banana milk?”
Jungkook was never angry, he was bothersome and got annoyed but never angry. Or you just hadn’t experienced his wrath until now.
“Who gave you permission to touch what’s mine?” He continued, his voice getting deeper.
“Why are you getting so worked up over banana milk?”
“Because!” He shouted making you flinch. “Banana milk is the only thing I look forward to every single day. Don’t touch what’s yours.”
Your eyes were wide in shock, he wasn’t the most intimidating guy— not with his bunny smile, but after seeing his true form of red eyes and devil horns, you decided never to touch his banana milk again.
You even bought you a new pack the next day.
» His mess «
There were empty cans everywhere you looked, empty packets of snacks, dirty dishes, as well as, unwashed laundry, and it all belonged to the one and only Jeon Jungkook.
The amount of mess he made was actually insane, there was no one in this world who was as messy or messier than him. It inflicted you with endless headaches and made you feel sick, how could someone live like this?
A lengthy sigh left your lips, it had been a long day at uni, plus you still weren’t passing your failing class, so all in all, it wasn’t going well. And to make matters worse, the flat was a mess.
Thanks, dickhead. I hope you choke on your banana milk, you grumbled.
If there was another place to stay, somewhere you could move to, or someone else you could live with, you would move out in a heartbeat— without so much as a second thought.
But no, luck wasn’t on your side like that.
“You know when you invited me over, I didn’t think it was to help you tidy up,” sassed Jinyoung.
You rolled your eyes at his comment before throwing a dirty sock in his direction. He was utterly appalled and deeply insulted that you’d done that, but you were too busy laughing at him to care.
Jinyoung was your best friend, you’d known him since the beginning of high school, he’d always been there for you, you knew everything about it him, and he knew everything about you— including your satanic shrine set-up to get rid of Jungkook.
He was about to retaliate and launch Jungkooks boxers at you when the front door swung open. Both of you watched Jungkook throw his bag aside before strolling into his room, he didn’t even notice you were there.
“I mean, my couch is always free.”
You snorted at Jinyoungs effort to make you feel better, “you’re so annoying.”
There was a smug expression on your best friends face, his remark successfully annoyed you and he felt great— even though, he truly meant what he said.
You were always more than welcome to stay with him, and you knew that.
Jinyoung helped you tidy up, leaving the pile of unwashed laundry to decay in front of Jungkooks’ door. He would step over them and ignore they were there, you’d seen him do it before, but there was no way in hell you’d do laundry for him.
Cleaning up empty cans and packets was enough.
“Next time, we should dump all the trash on his bed,” Jinyoung remarked before making himself comfortable on your bed.
A laugh split your lips as you handed him his ice cream, “he would either sleep with it or let it rot on the floor.”
“Have you ever been inside his room?”
“No.”
“Aren’t you curious?”
“Not really...”
Jinyoung hummed in response, now focused on his ice cream instead. He didn’t question you further, because maybe he knew you were just a little, tiny bit, curious to see how it looked.
After minutes of silence and simply appreciating your ice creams, the both of you lay on your bed, doing nothing except staring at the ceiling, saying nothing besides listening to each other’s breathing.
It was peaceful, the nice kind of peace that wasn’t heavy or boring. These kinds of moments with Jinyoung were your favourite, the kind where you could bask in each other’s company without having to say a single word.
You rolled over to face your best friend, his eyes were fixed on the ceiling fan, following the way it twirled endlessly. He was a handsome boy, he was a sassy boy, and he was also a very kind boy, but he was single.
And you sometimes spent hours thinking about why.
“Jinyoung, will you ever get into a relationship?” You asked with sheer curiosity.
His eyebrows furrowed together and the expression of distaste won over his content features, it was quite amusing to watch if you were honest.
He always made the funniest faces without meaning to be funny.
“Does it look like I want to waste my precious time trying to please another human when the only one I need to please is myself?”
Jinyoung could’ve ranted for hours, he could have gone on and on and on about how he doesn’t need anyone. Which is why you changed the subject and spoke about how heavy Yugyeom snored throughout the last lecture.
It had the two of you laughing aloud, bringing tears to the eyes as you both proceeded to simultaneously list the funniest things that have happened.
Being with Jinyoung was better than a lot of things.
“Oh my gosh, did I tell you when Jungkook got angry at me for drinking all his banana milk?” You wheezed.
Jinyoung snorted and burst out laughing, shocked at your roommates' behaviour over milk— and it being banana flavoured.
“Why don’t you threaten to drink all his milk if he doesn’t clean up after himself?”
You quirked an eyebrow at his suggestion, that didn’t seem like a bad idea at all, you thought to yourself. After spending hours on end with Jinyoung, you finally said goodbye to him after telling him to text you when he got home.
Jungkook stepped out of his room when he heard the last goodbye, faltering over the pile of dirty clothes in front of his door, he complained to himself while continuing towards the fridge.
Banana milk!
Silently, with an evil grin on your lips, you trailed behind him, “Jungkook,” you called making him flinch over how close and loud you were. “You gotta start cleaning up after yourself. You’re disgusting.”
He sneered, piercing the carton with his straw, “and if I don’t?”
“If you don’t, I’ll drink all your banana milk.”
There was genuine panic in Jungkooks eyes that night.
» His hoodies «
A yawn broke your lips, eyes drooping at the sound of your lecturers' boring voice. She seemed to go on and on and on about who knows what?
This was the class you were failing, there was no time for you to be falling asleep, but you couldn’t help it, she was so dull and it was hard to concentrate.
Jinyoung who was seated next to you was too busy throwing paper balls at a fast asleep Yugyeom, he didn’t care about this class either, but he was failing like you.
You huffed to yourself, resting your chin on your hand which was hidden under your sleeve. Well, it wasn’t your sleeve per se, it wasn’t your hoodie to begin with.
It was Jungkooks’. His loss though, right?
Okay, so maybe, just maybe, you stole it, but he hadn’t noticed yet, it’d been three days and he hadn’t even asked if you’d seen it anywhere.
Therefore, no harm is done.
“I gotta ask again,” Jinyoung whispered while rolling another paper ball. “Why did you steal his hoodie if you want absolutely nothing to do with him?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you retaliated in a loud enough whisper.
Jinyoung snorted, throwing another ball at his friend.
What you didn’t notice, and your best friend did, was the way Jungkook had been staring at you, attempting to figure out where he’d seen the hoodie you were wearing.
Good thing he wasn’t that smart, Jinyoung shook his head before focusing on packing his things and leaving the lecture hall with you in tow.
➴➶➴➶
You were humming a tune to yourself in the kitchen while preparing a sandwich, something light to munch on while you studied— or at least tried to.
Jungkook came behind you, glancing over your shoulder to see what you were doing before ‘accidentally’ knocking your elbow.
“Oh! Sorry,” he exaggerated when he heard you gasp. “I didn’t see you there.”
A scowl crossed your features when the words left his lips, he was so, so, so, irritating. You hated him, you hated him, you really really hated him.
“You did that on purpose,” it was a swift argument back. “You’re such a dick.”
Jungkook snorted, standing tall with his eyes piercing down into yours, “always bringing my dick into any situation you can, aren’t you?” He tsk’d. “I’m not the one going around steal other people’s belongings.”
“What—“
“First my banana milk and now my clothes. What next, hm? I bet you would’ve stolen my virginity too if I was still a virgin.”
God, he was so infuriating.
“As if I would ever have sex with you.”
Jungkook leant in, bringing his face level to yours, his lips merely inches away, eyes staring darkly into yours and his warm breath melting into your skin.
He was so close. Too close.
“Liars go to hell, princess.”
You gulped. There was a definite glint you’d never seen in his eyes before— in anyone’s eyes. It wasn’t scary but it made you feel something you’d not felt in a long time.
Arousal.
“I’ll let you keep this hoodie since it looks good on you,” he spoke up again, but his voice was still low and very deep. “However, if I notice you take something else, I won’t let you off so easily.”
He left you with an unfamiliar and wet warmth that night.
» His revenge «
A loud groan parted your lips, the thought of studying for another hour was hurting your head. Three hours had to be enough, for now, right?
You turned to glance at your alarm clock which sat on your bedside table, next to your phone that had been buzzing constantly for the past half an hour. Jinyoung.
It was 8:33pm. A good time as any for a snack.
After stretching your very rigid muscles, you bounced off your chair and happily made way to the kitchen. Jungkook was in his room, probably wanking off or something, so he couldn’t bother you right now.
Not even the horrible weather could put you in a bad mood.
However, however, however, you couldn’t find your snacks anywhere. They were normally kept in a box on the bottom shelf in an empty cupboard, but that box, which was on the bottom shelf, was empty.
There was nothing inside it, and there definitely should’ve been because you bought so many new snacks the night before.
Honestly, you could’ve cried. Feeling irritation, anger, as well as, sadness, you stormed towards Jungkooks room and pounded on the door, ignoring the warning sign taped on the wood.
“Jungkook!” You whined. “I never touched your banana milk again, why did you steal all my snacks?! How could you?”
There was a genuine sad pout on your face when he swung the door open, he would’ve felt bad if it were someone else, but it was you, and you hated him, so why should he feel any sympathy towards you?
“You can always buy more tomorrow,” he told you.
“I can’t afford to,” you fought, not with anger, but sadness. “Those snacks were supposed to last me two weeks, you ate them all in one night.”
Jungkook shrugged.
“It’s just a bit selfish, isn’t it?”
You’d mumbled it quietly, not really wanting him to hear, but he’d heard and he tried so hard not to feel guilty.
After stammering an apology for bothering him, you gradually progressed towards your room, leaving Jungkook to think about what he’d done.
» His punishment «
You were extremely annoying, continually having something to say back to him, always bickering with him, and calling him names, but never, not once, did you ignore him.
Over the months of living together, he figured out you hated him, but you didn’t pretend he didn’t exist, you didn’t ignore his presence, no. You bothered him and cursed him out and made sure his life was living hell.
Of course, Jungkook was extremely annoyed at you for being so irritating, but he enjoyed the bickering. Albeit he’d never tell you.
He groaned at another failed attempt at getting your attention. You were sitting on the floor trying to do your homework, head resting on the coffee table, doing your utmost best to ignore the monster behind you.
Jungkook genuinely wanted you to bicker back with him, although he didn’t really know why he wanted your attention, he just knew he wanted something.
“Y/n,” he whined, foot nudging your thigh closest to him. “Please argue back with me.”
Ignoring him was harder than you thought, you were so used to instantaneously throwing an insult back that you had to mentally tape your mouth shut.
Jungkook gave up that night, it was no use. He was basically talking to a brick wall. Leaving you study by yourself, he left with an exhalation.
You watched him with a triumphant smile, but you felt as though you missed out on something.
» His turn «
It was raining, but you couldn’t hear the pitter patter like you normally could. There was a movie playing on your computer, but you couldn’t hear the dialogue like you should’ve been able to.
All because of Jeon Jungkook and his stupid loud, extremely bad music.
A groan withdrew from your lips (which you couldn’t even hear) as you let yourself drop back into your pillows. If you weren’t still ignoring him or at least trying to, you would’ve body-slammed him out of the window.
You must’ve done something awful in your past life if you were being forced to live like this now, you uttered to yourself as you stormed towards his room.
Jungkook was overdue a long list of insults.
There was no point in banging on his door since he wouldn’t be able to hear you, you couldn’t even hear yourself breathe. So, for the first time since living with him, you barged in.
Wrong move...
He was in nothing but his boxers, sure he wasn’t naked, but he wasn’t exactly fully clothed either.
The sight in front of you, however, wasn’t a disturbing one. The way his back was propped on his headboard, the way his eyes focused on his comic book, the way his head bopped to the song, it was all notably attractive... for some reason.
Jungkook glanced up and saw you staring at him in shock, a smirk would’ve propelled its way to his lips, but he was annoyed that you’d been ignoring him, more so, that you barged into his room without knocking— he would never do that to you.
Turning down the volume, he sat up, “can I help you?”
You swallowed at the hoarse sound of his voice, what was going on with you right now? Why was he suddenly so attractive? Wait, was he always this good-looking?
“Your music is too loud,” you mumbled.
Jungkook rolled his eyes and paused the song before getting off his bed, and advancing towards you with a glare on his face.
He stared down at you, arms crossed, “it’s off, you happy now?”
You nodded your head, eyes gazing intensely into his. If he wasn’t so bothersome, if he didn’t aggravate you and if you didn’t despise him. You were 100% certain you would’ve fallen in love with him.
Jungkook snorted at the expression on your face, his features softening as he tousled your hair before gently closing the door.
There was a funny feeling in your chest when you went to sleep that night, followed by a funny feeling in your chest when you woke the next morning.
There was a basket of snacks perched neatly in front of your door, a note hidden beneath a box of chocolates, Jungkook was seriously out for your heart.
» 2 drunks, 1 mistake «
It wasn’t unlike you to give up studying, but it was unlike you to say yes to a party Jinyoung wanted to go to with you. He was surprised you’d given in so easily, but, over the moon, he didn’t need to beg you.
“Are you planning on getting wasted?” Jinyoung snorted as he observed you tan another drink.
He raised an eyebrow, watching you shake your head in distaste to the strong taste. Alcohol wasn’t your favourite, but it did its bit to encourage you to have fun.
You gradually began to let yourself go as the drink within you gave you a step of confidence. Jinyoung watched you dance in amusement, plastic red cup in one hand while his other held his phone, recording you at that moment.
A smile presented a way to your lips when you twisted around and spotted his phone. The flash gave away the fact he was recording, maybe on snapchat to post on his story, maybe something to laugh about the next day; whatever it was, you didn’t care.
“Jinyoung, dance with me,” you urged, motioning for him to join you with your hand.
He shook his head, not because he didn’t want to dance, but because he wasn’t drunk enough to deal with you right now. However, he was enjoying the sight of you completely losing yourself and finally, after a long time, giving in to have fun.
Jungkook was on the other side of the room, drunk himself, seeing you have fun without him. It didn’t take long for him to muster up the courage to approach you, not when the alcohol was giving him a helping hand.
“Y/n,” he cheered, gaining your attention. “Let’s dance!”
Without so much as a second thought, you began dancing with him. Eyes wavy and mind hazy, the night went on with Jungkook by your side.
It wasn’t until your back hit the cold wall, you felt Jungkooks’ warm hands wander your body. His lips were on your neck, wet and slick, your hands were pulling his hair, urging him to go faster, to hurry up and stop teasing you.
“Jungkook,” you moaned earning a growl in return.
He stopped his ministrations on your neck, and led you towards his room, pushing you to lay on the bed while he stripped out of his t-shirt, threw his jeans aside and then crawled towards you.
Jungkook kissed you slowly but intoxicatingly, his hand moved down your form and glid under your dress, exploring and touching everywhere except where you needed him to touch you.
“Jungkook,” you muttered against his lips. “Please stop teasing me.”
His eyes were dark and glazed as he stared into yours with so much lust, want and need. An exhalation escaped your lips when he connected his lips back to your neck, hand slipping into your pants, taunting your clit.
You heaved at the ministration, writhing beneath him, silently asking for more. For anything, for something. He removed his hand, pulling your dress up along with his hand that progressed towards the back, reaching for the zip.
“Take it off,” he whispered in your ear in a low growl. “Let me see you.”
Your breathing got heavier as you watched him sit up, allowing you to move and take off your uncomfortable dress. Just like that, in slow and precise movements, the dress slipped off and hit the floor.
The alcohol from earlier was still evidently in your system, otherwise, you would have never crawled towards Jungkook and drawn him for an intoxicating and needy kiss.
Jungkook pushed you to lie down again,  so he was on top, so he could assert dominance and let you know that he was in charge and always will be.
It didn’t bother you, not when he knew what he was doing; when he was so confident in the way his hand wandered down your body, towards your heat.
Another moan parted your lips, music to Jungkooks ear. He decided there and then, after hearing you call out his name breathlessly into the night, that it would be his favourite sound.
“I bet you thought you about me every night,” he muttered in a deep, drunken, voice.
You could only nod your head, afraid that your words would get stuck in your throat due to the pleasure he was causing you.
There was no uncertainty in Jungkooks’ movements when he slipped a finger and then another into your heat, he revelled in your moans and whines, urging you to get louder the faster he pumped his digits in and out.
His free hand played with your breast, his lips nipping the skin, forcing you to squirm under his ministrations, it felt so good— amazing even, but you wanted more, needed more.
“Jungkook,” you gasped out, pulling at his hair to gain his attention. “Please, just fuck me already.”
There was a smirk on his face, a glint in his eyes as if he’d been anticipating for you to say those words. As much as he loved teasing you to no extent, he needed to feel you, to be inside you just the way he dreamt about.
He didn’t hesitate to pull off his boxers, to yank your pants down your legs, to line himself off and without a single warning, push himself deep inside.
Jungkook left you feeling breathless that night, he had you coming undone more than once and he left you feeling fully satisfied as he came deep inside.
No other words were exchanged when he drew you into his chest and lulled you to sleep with beating heart and warm body.
» The aftermath «
The next morning you woke up sweating, you had a sore head and felt sick to your stomach, forcing yourself out of bed and rushing to the closest bathroom. You heaved but nothing came out as your head hung in the toilet and your naked form sat on the cold tiled floor.
The night before was all a haze, and trying to remember what happened while sitting next to the toilet wasn’t a good idea. However, it all hit you when you stepped out of the bathroom; into the room that wasn’t yours.
You felt yourself break into a cold sweat, your eyes scanning the room before settling on a familiar face— another body just as naked as yours.
The sick feeling hurried back, but it wasn’t because of the alcohol, no, this time it was regret and the fear of allowing yourself to become another girl on Jungkooks list.
What had you done?
➴➶➴➶
Jungkook went on as if everything was normal; as if nothing had happened. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do so, not when you were sinking in newly developed feelings for the male who didn’t believe in commitment.
An agitated sigh parted your lips, you couldn’t sleep, not when the drunken night with Jungkook played on loop whenever you closed your eyes. Fortunately, Jinyoung was nice enough to let you stay the night at his, but you couldn’t stay here forever.
“Are you ever going to speak to him about this?” Jinyoung inquired, examining the dark circles under your eyes from no sleep.
There was a frown on your face when you turned to look at your best friend, “how can I?” You disputed. “He’s acting as if nothing happened, Jinyoung. You don’t understand, Jungkook doesn’t do relationships.”
“Ignore him then.”
A scoff left your lips, that was easier said than done you thought.
“I can’t,” you told him, eyes cast aside.
“Then confess.”
This time you met his intense and challenging gaze, “just because I know that Jungkook likes to drink banana milk after uni, or that he likes to eat cereal at 3am after gaming because he feels peckish, doesn’t mean I like him,” you were out of breath, heart racing as you spoke.
Jinyoung snickered in return. You gulped.
» The regret «
It was pouring while you waited for your roommate to get home. After speaking to Jinyoung, you decided he was right and you couldn’t keep pretending that you were okay.
The front door slammed shut, interrupting you from your thoughts. Jungkook kicked off his shoes and threw his soaked jacket aside. His hair was wet, and there was a frown on his face, but he looked as cute as ever.
He didn’t notice you were back home, not until you stood up and muttered his name. His eyes widened at the sight before him, you’d left without a single word and came back three days later as if it was a reasonable thing to do.
“Where have you been?” He demanded.
Jungkook was angry.
“I stayed over at Jinyoungs.”
He shook his head in disapproval before running a hand through his dripping hair. The feeling still lingered in your own hand from that night as you watched his movements.
“And you didn’t bother to tell me because?”
You licked your lips, eyes meeting his dark ones, “I’ve never had to tell you before,” you fought. “Why does it matter now?”
“You’ve never been gone for three days.”
His tone was getting louder, angrier and more irritated. But you were becoming angry too; who did he think was? Especially acting as if nothing had happened between you two.
“You’re not my boyfriend, Jungkook. I don’t need to tell you anything, it’s not like I expect you to tell me when you’ll be home after a night out,” you said, eyes gazing intensely into his. “Now let me ask you something, is it fun to act like everything between us is normal? You know very well why I disappeared for days.”
Jungkook scoffed, arms crossed over his broad chest as if asserting dominance, “we had sex, so what? Everyone has drunk sex now and then.”
“I’m not everyone, you asshole!” You shouted. “I don’t go around having sex with every girl and guy I see. You’re the second person I’ve ever had sex with, I know it’s not a big deal to you but, it means a whole lot to me.”
Jungkook licked his lips.
“You wanted to have sex with me just as much as I did with you. Don’t blame all this on me.”
“I’m not! Don’t you get it? I’m in love with you!”
It came out before you could think twice about saying it, the words slipped out in anger, you really didn’t mean to say it. But now that it was out in the open, there was no point in taking it back, so you waited; waited for Jungkook to speak.
Instead, however, he uncrossed his arms and cast his eyes aside. Your heart dropped into your stomach and you felt sick, dizzy almost as you watched him hesitate.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I don’t do relationships.”
» The awkwardness «
Jinyoung was trying his best to be there for you, you were struggling to pass the one class you hated and Jungkook was, well, avoiding you at all cost.
A yawn escaped your lips, it was becoming harder to keep your eyes open as minutes slowly turned into hours. If you decided to call it a night and go to sleep, you would never pass your exam.
At that moment, you really wanted to scream and cry. Shout at the world for not being on your side since the beginning of the school year, why was it so hard on you? What did you do wrong?
An exhausted cry left your lips while you slumped back in your seat. The words in the textbook stopped making sense hours ago, Jinyoung was no longer awake to help you and you had no one else to turn to.
Feeling extremely agitated, you closed the book and hurled it away from you, almost hitting Jungkook while doing so. He stared at the textbook by his feet and chuckled to himself before glancing at a very distraught you.
“Are you struggling that much?”
His voice was soft and somewhat comforting, but it was awkward and you couldn’t bring yourself to glance at him, so you hesitantly nodded your head instead.
There was a kind smile on his lips that you missed when he sat down next to you. Not too close because he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, but close enough to help you.
“What do you need help with?” He urged placing the textbook back on the table.
You sighed in defeat, “everything.”
Without hesitation, Jungkook started from the beginning and helped simplify the text. He made it easier to understand, besides the awkward silences that took place in between, you began to understand what you once didn’t.
And thanks to Jungkook, you were confident when it was time to sit the exam. Safe to say, you finally passed the class you hated as much as you once hated your roommate.
Although it was still very awkward between you, Jungkook stopped avoiding you. He didn’t say much— not like he used to, but you didn’t make an effort either since you still had a lot on your mind.
Still, things were getting better.
» The silent reconciliation «
You were lying on the floor with the balcony door wide open, the cool air from outside wasn’t enough to stop you from over-heating as the sun beamed through the window.
The weather got nicer as the days passed by, summer vacation was just around the corner and you knew you would have nothing to do. So, you decided to mope around earlier rather than later, Jinyoung wasn’t too impressed when you told him.
“You’re not a cat,” he told you.
“You can’t do that all summer,” he said.
A shake in disagreement had him rolling his eyes and crossing his arms.
There were crumbs littered around you with empty packets of crisps and cans. A smile adorned your face as you watched the male lead finally kiss the female.
Jungkook entered the flat to you on the floor, surrounded by a mess and a grin on your face. The drama you were watching wasn’t even that good, he grimaced hearing one of the many cheesy lines.
He proceeded towards the fridge to get his banana milk before settling into the couch; to join you. To enjoy your company for once instead of locking himself in his room.
“How can you watch that without cringing?”
Jungkooks’ question made you laugh, you sat up to look at him and shrugged your shoulders. There was something about the way you smiled at him to the way you crawled towards him to sit on the couch.
Jungkook gulped.
He didn’t even notice you were wearing nothing but an oversized shirt— an old one that once belonged to him.
“It’s not too bad, you get used to it actually.”
Jungkook glimpsed at you from the side of his eye before focusing back on the tv. Your confession was still fresh in his mind, playing like a broken record over and over again.
You never mentioned it again, mainly because he avoided you for like a week and you found it too awkward to talk to him. But things seemed to be okay now, he thought.
“What do you like to watch anyway?” You asked, shifting to look at him.
Jungkook was surprised by your question, but thinking about it, neither of you knew anything about the other.
“Iron man,” he told you.
A laugh parted your lips at his response, the way he said it with such an innocent face made him look like a child. It was cute.
Silence took place once your focus was back on the tv, there was nothing much to say or talk about. You’d never spent time like this together, although it was nice, it wasn’t normal.
You licked your lips, mind full of thoughts and such as you got off the couch. Perhaps, you still felt a little bit uncomfortable around him, not because he was sitting next to you, but because your confession was gnawing at your mind like a parasite.
“Where are you going?” Came his question.
It took a lot in you to turn around and stare at him, to make eye contact and to fake a smile. Fortunately, it didn’t take him long to catch on, to think about what he asked and awkwardly avoid eye contact.
“I’m sorry, Jungkook,” was your response. “It’s still a little bit difficult to be around you. I just need some time for things to go back to normal.”
What if I don’t want that, he thought to himself. What if he didn’t want things to go back to normal, what would you say then?
“But,” you added with a genuine smile this time. “I think I like this better— being friends instead of constantly bickering.”
Jungkooks’ smile in return was just as genuine.
» A new friend «
“UNO!”
Grumbling in irritation of possibly losing another round, you picked up 4 cards and then internally cried when you watched Jungkook throw down his last card.
There was a frown on your face when you threw your nine cards in his direction. When Jungkook suggested playing Uno you didn’t think you would lose every single game.
“I don’t want to play anymore,” you pouted.
That night Jungkook learnt you disliked losing.
➴➶➴➶
One hit. Two. Three more.
Six.
“Y/n, stop throwing popcorn at me and watch the damn movie,” he laughed when you hit him again.
There was a mischievous grin on your face, he wasn’t paying attention as his eyes were back on the tv. You took this as an opportunity to take a handful of popcorn and propel it at him, Jungkook shouted your name before chasing after you.
That night Jungkook learnt you got bored easily.
➴➶➴➶
You were in Jungkooks’ room, he had his last class today so he wasn’t home. Not yet, anyway. So, you took that as your chance to invade his closet for another hoodie, another black one.
When he got home you were still going through each hoodie, narrowing it down to three and then two and then choosing the one you liked best. Although all of them looked the same, there was a different comfort to each of them.
Jungkook had banana milk in his hand, straw in his mouth as he observed you from his doorway. There was a wide grin on his face while he watched you try the last one on.
“Are you seriously stealing my clothes again?”
You pursed your lips, preferring the last one you tried on better than any of the others and then smiled in triumph.
“At least it’s not your banana milk,” you teased before sliding off to your room.
That night Jungkook learnt you liked his hoodies better than your own.
➴➶➴➶
You lay your head on Jungkooks’ shoulder, a yawn broke your lips as you attempted to stay awake. It had been a long day, and you were exhausted.
Especially since Jungkooks’ loud friend had woken you up so early, Namjoon was his name you think, or was it Taehyung? You couldn’t quite remember.
It didn’t matter though, you would be in your bed soon, you just needed to wait for Jungkook; he wanted to say bye to his friends before leaving the party youse were currently at.
However, they were nowhere to be seen.
“Jungkook,” you muttered earning his attention. “I’ll head home, you can stay a little longer and hang out with your friends.”
His eyebrows furrowed in thought, “are you sure?”
“Of course!”
There was a smile on your face, a genuine one at that, but you did feel a little sad that you two weren’t walking back home together. No matter, you’d see him the next morning considering you lived together. Duh.
Jungkook watched you stand up and stretch your arms, he missed your warmth already. He let you gather your things, sliding on your jacket before reaching for your bag.
Luckily, it wasn’t a big party and just a friendly get together to celebrate the end of the school year. Well, one of many yet to come.
“I’ll give Jinyoung a call and talk to him on my walk home, that way it’ll feel like a faster walk,” you said before heading towards the door.
Jungkook hesitated for a second, glancing around in quick movements his friends really were nowhere to be seen at that moment, so he thought what the heck, and rushed after you.
You were surprised to see him, considering he was eager to say bye to his friends since they were going back home for summer break and he wasn’t.
“I promised you we would walk home together,” he explained before you could question him. “Let’s go.”
That night you learnt that either Jungkook kept his promises, or you meant a whole lot more to him than you thought.
» Euphoria «
There was a soft smile on your face, mind zoning in and out as your eyes slipped closed every few seconds before you opened them once again.
It was a nice evening, Jungkook thought as he admired you from his place on the love-seat. You were on the floor, leaning against the balcony railing, appreciating the view, savouring the nice weather and listening to the bustling city.
The idea of spending the rest of the evening on the balcony was your idea, Jungkook merely agreed because he had nothing better to do, except drink banana milk, and right now, spending time with you deemed sweeter.
There was a smile on lips as he appreciated your features from his seat. The setting sun, golden with soft hues of oranges, hit off your face perfectly making it seem as if you were glowing.
Jungkook felt his heart beating loudly in his chest, drumming in ears and spinning in his mind while he thought about you and your confession.
Was it too late to bring it up? Maybe, maybe not.
You turned around to face Jungkook, smiled wide and genuine before moving to stand in between his legs. He thought you were beautiful when you smiled without a reason; when you smiled at him and for him.
He thought you were most beautiful when you were yourself, not caring a single bit about what others thought of you.
“Jungkook, if you could have anything in the world, what would it be?”
It was an innocent question because you were genuinely curious to learn more about him, and get to know him better than you already did.
Jungkook stood up, eyes gazing down into yours.
“If I could have anything in the world, I would choose you.”
A gasp left your lips, you weren’t expecting that to be the answer. You thought he would speak about a dream job or a lifetime supply of banana milk. Not you.
He gently cupped your cheek with one hand while circling the other around your waist to draw you closer. You didn’t push him away, you didn’t stop him, no. Instead, you let him do as he pleased because, for the first time, you felt the racing of his heart.
“I don’t know if you still feel the same way about me, but I’m in love with you, y/n,” he confessed. “I know I told you that I don’t do relationships, but I’m willing to try and succeed with you, and... And I know I didn’t go by things the right way, and I’m really sorry, buh—but I’ll be better. I’ll do better... for you. Always.”
Without hesitation, without a single thought of reconsideration, you kissed him. You kissed him with tenderness and passion, you kissed him slowly and softly.
And he kissed back with just as much.
There was a soft smile on his lips when you parted, and for the first time, you saw genuine love and care in his eyes.
That was when you felt intense happiness.
“Of course, I love you, Jungkook,” you spoke softly but surely. “You’re my euphoria.”
➴➶➴➶
« thank you for reading, feedback is always appreciated. »
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hawkbucks · 4 years
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Through The Years (a.k.a the fic I’m surprised I finished) Wordcount: 11014 Relationships: Natasha & Tony, Natasha/Pepper, Tony/Bucky A/N: C*v*l W*r simply does not exist. Originally posted to my original blog. Inspired by an anon who I hope can see this again someday. 
Barely beta’d and beta’d barely. Please let me know of any typos.  Summary: Tony brings home Natasha one day, proclaiming her to be his new sister.
Natasha takes this all in stride.
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Tony is 8 and Natasha is 12 when Tony brings Natasha home for the first time.
“Mamma!” he brightly exclaims as soon as Maria opens the door, holding up one of his hands that is intertwined with one of Natasha’s. “This is Natasha! She helped me while I was walkin’ home from school today.” Before Maria can say anything, Tony is already rushing past her, dragging his newfound friend into the living room with him. He leads her to the rather lavish, cream-colored couch that’s bigger than necessary and tells her to sit down, letting go of her hand.
“Some’a the kids at school were followin’ me and sayin’ bad things to me,” Tony starts to explain as he takes off his patent leather shoes, remembering what his mother said about tracking dirt into the house. “But Natasha made ‘em go away. Then she said she’d keep walkin’ with me so that I’d get home all safe. She was really awesome!”
Natasha’s pale cheeks flush, almost as if she’s embarrassed about the praise Tony is singing about her. She quietly takes off her own battered and beaten shoes, a neon blue bandaid sitting right above her left ankle. With her wild red hair and skinny arms, it’s hard to think of her as someone who would be able to shoo away a group of rowdy 8-year-olds.
Tony finally joins her on the couch, sighing as he sinks into the cushions. “Mamma, I think Natasha should be my sister,” he says with a decisive nod. “I like her. She can have the room nex’ to mine and everything!”
Maria’s head still feels like it’s spinning from Tony’s explanation of what happened, so she settles for a smile as she walks over after locking the door. “It is good that Natasha helped you, ‘Tonio.” She rests a caring hand on Tony’s cheek, and he leans into it with childish affection. “I have no doubt that she would make a good sister–” she glances at Natasha, whose flush seems to have gotten even deeper– “but she probably has a family of her own, bambino. You bringing her here… what if her parents are worried?” she gently scolds.
Tony’s eyebrows furrow as guilt spreads across his features. “Oh.” That’s all he says.
Before Maria can offer any soothing words, Natasha speaks up. It’s so soft that Maria has to strain her ears to hear her: “I don’t have any parents.” Both Maria and Tony turn to look at her, but she keeps her gaze on a spot on the carpet a few inches to the right of the coffee table in front of her. “No family. Well, I live with an aunt, but…” Natasha bites her bottom lip. “She’s not very nice.”
Maria’s heart clenches at how raw the girl looks like right now. Her eyes hold a deep sadness that she is far too young to be harboring.
Tony doesn’t even think before he wraps his arms around Natasha’s shoulders, a soft distressed noise leaving his throat. He continues to hug her until Natasha pushes him away, the beginnings of a smile on her face.
And yet, Maria notices, the smile does not reach her eyes.
(Howard snorts, gesturing vaguely with a crystal tumbler in his hand. “Another child? Anthony is already a handful, and you want to bring in another child?”
Maria’s jaw sets, eyes alight with a determined flame. “I am not asking that we adopt her, Howard–not yet. I am asking that we at least give her a place to stay.” She shakes her head, thinking back to the scene on the couch earlier. “I would not feel comfortable sending her back to her aunt. She almost cried, Howard. At the very least, she should be able to sleep without being scared!”
It isn’t until Howard looks at her, eyebrows raised, that Maria realizes how passionate she sounded. “Whatever,” he mutters. “Just know that she is your responsibility.”)
Tony is 10 and Natasha is 14 when the papers go through and Natasha goes from being a Romanoff to a Stark. It’s kept quiet from the press, thanks to Howard’s exorbitant amounts of money.
Maria hugs her, warm and motherly. Tony excitedly latches onto her side, talking her ear off about all the cool things they can do now that they’re brother and sister. Hell, even Howard begrudgingly says something about how she does seem like a nice girl.
All of that, of course, makes it harder for Natasha to tell them the truth: she’s a spy. And an assassin. Or at least she was. She blurts it out the second they step foot back into the house. It’s better they know now, she thinks, instead of years down the line. She would never do anything to hurt them–never–but they deserve to know. If it results in her being kicked out, well… the past 2 years have been the best of her life.
Maria, at first, is horrified. She immediately ushers Tony away while he’s still too shocked to protest (To protect him, Natasha realizes, from her. Just in case). Natasha braces herself, ready for Maria to yell and scream at her, but all she does is sigh heavily, eyes turning downcast. “You are so young,” she says, sounding pained, “and you do all that?”
Natasha inhales, eyes flickering between Maria and Howard. “I used to. The organization–the place I worked for, I ran away.” She waits for any interjection, any sign that she’s not welcome in the house anymore–not welcome around Tony–but none comes. So she continues. “I guess they never caught up. I lied by omission, I guess. Doesn’t make it any better, but I figured I should tell you guys now.” More silence. “And, just so you know, I wouldn’t have hurt any of you.”
Surprisingly, it’s Howard that speaks up next. “Why don’t you work for S.H.I.E.L.D?” he offers.
“Howard!” Maria gasps, scandalized. “She just got out of that life and you–and you want to put her back in it? And she’s so young–”
“S.H.I.E.L.D is a hell of a lot safer a bet than whatever hack job organization she was running with originally! They must not be that good if they can lose a child,” he shoots back. “Protection–we can protect her there. She can help this country, atone for her past!”  
Maria’s face is openly appalled. “She is 14–”
“I’ll do it,” Natasha interjects, jaw set in determination when Maria and Howard–mom and dad, she corrects–look at her. “I’m proficient in over 7 different styles of martial arts, along with receiving specialized marksman training. My entire life, I grew up immersed in the arts of espionage.” She squares her shoulders, like she senses a challenge. “I can do it.”
(“You’re an assassin. Does that mean you’ve killed people, Nat?” Tony asks, innocently enough, as he scribbles down measurements and observations about a weapon he’s taken apart to study.
An ugly sound tears itself from Natasha’s throat, somewhere between a snarl and a growl. “Don’t ask that question, Tony.”
Tony flinches. “Sorry. Sorry, I won’t–sorry.” He bites his bottom lip, worrying the already fragile skin there.)
Tony is 14 and Natasha is 18 when Tony gets accepted to M.I.T.
Natasha insists on accompanying him under the alias of “Natalie Rushman.” They fudge her papers, place her in classes that’s she’s never going to have to attend, and put her up in an apartment off campus. Howard asks about what’s going to happen should they need her at S.H.I.E.L.D. She says they should be fine, but if it’s truly an emergency, then they can call.
She hangs out around Tony, saying that she’s his old tutor who was positively ecstatic when she found out that Tony would be attending the same college that she does and decided to take him under her wing the second he stepped on campus.
Tony resists at first, saying that it feels too much like she’s babysitting him. “I’m not 8 anymore, Nat,” he grumbles as he spins around in one of the spinny-chairs he has in his dorm. “You don’t need to protect me everywhere I go.”
Then a few days later, because the universe likes laughing at him, a bigger, older student tries to pick a fight with him. They taunt him, saying that he only got into M.I.T because of daddy’s name and daddy’s money. He can barely hear over the blood rushing in his ears; all of the shit he’s been through, all of his hard work, and there are still people out there who only see him as Howard’s brat, Howard’s son who relies on dad to do everything for him.
He turns around to shout something back, something even more inciting, but Natasha’s already there–and she has the bully on their knees, twisting their arm around their back. “That’s not very nice,” he hears Natasha whisper, venom dripping from every word. “I know you were trying to invoke him. Trying to get him to swing at you so you have an excuse. That’s pathetic.” She lets them go and they fall face-first onto the ground, a puff of dirt billowing up. Some students stop to watch. A couple have their phones out.
“Go,” she says coldly, stepping over their body. “Don’t let me see you around him again.”
Tony whistles as they get up and scurry away, not daring to look back. “I take back what I said,” he says, shoving both of his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I guess it’s good to have you around.”
She gets him into a headlock and ruffles his hair.
Tony is still 14 and Natasha is still 18 when she meets Rhodey, Tony’s roommate and future best-friend-for-life for the first time.
He’s nice, she determines when Rhodey greets her with a genuine smile and a firm handshake. “I’m glad there’s someone else looking out for Tony. It feels like a full-time job sometimes,” she says, placing a hand on Tony’s shoulder.
Tony shrugs her hand off, pouting petulantly. “I’m not that bad.”
Rhodey laughs again. “Tones, you wrote an angrily-worded letter to a teacher after you said they, and I quote, ‘explained thermonuclear dynamics like a drunk orangutan.’”
“Because they did!”
Tony is 15 and Natasha is 19 when they decide to tell Rhodey the truth.
“It’s only fair that you know, man.” Tony continues fiddling with his seat, making himself go up and down and up and down. “You’re gonna have to sign some NDAs and stuff, but yeah. Technically Natalie is my sister. And she’s the best spy in the business.” There’s a hint of pride in that last sentence.
Rhodey’s eyes narrow as he looks from Natasha to Tony and back to Natasha again. “This feels like an elaborate practical joke,” he mutters. He further scrutinizes them, but apparently finds no evidence to support his thoughts. “So, Tones, with all of this…” he looks at Natasha, “is Natalie even your real name?”
Natasha simply smiles.
Tony is 17 and Natasha is 21 when Tony graduates M.I.T with a degree in electrical engineering.
She takes a jet straight after finishing a mission in Germany. Sure, she’s a tad bit sleep-deprived and she has some bruises on her ribs, but like hell is she going to miss Tony’s graduation.
“Good job.” Natasha takes off his cap and ruffles his hair once again. “I’m proud of you.” Howard and Maria have already given Tony their congratulations; she can still see Maria’s lipstick stains on Tony’s cheek. No matter how much he scrubs, they wouldn’t come off.
Tony beams up at her with so much pride and admiration in his face that it feels like she’s the one that’s graduating. “I should thank you, you know. Um, you really… you really helped me.” When Rhodey wasn’t available, it was Natasha who helped him deal with the stress of his entirely-too-large workload. It was Natasha who listened to him list off his insecurities–his fear of never being good enough–and helped him work through them. It was Natasha who guided him with a firm, yet gentle hand. “I’m… I’m glad that you stayed with us.”
Natasha smiles. “I’m glad that I stayed.”
Tony hugs her (not seeing her wince) before running off to join his friends.
Tony is 20 and Natasha is 24 when their parents die.
Tony freezes when they’re told the news. She can almost hear the gears in his brain turning, trying desperately to comprehend what he’s just been told. Then, he runs to his room like a scolded child, slamming the door behind him and rattling the pictures hanging on the walls.
Natasha’s shoulders deflate. Maria and Howard might have not been her biological parents, but they were there. They took care of her–spoiled her, in her opinion. Any normal child living a normal life probably would’ve never worried about getting enough to eat or having enough clean clothes to wear, but Natasha is far from normal. All of the things they gave her were precious.
(Okay, maybe it was more Maria than Howard, but at least Howard gave her a place in S.H.I.E.L.D and never really complained.)
She gives herself 10 minutes before she goes after Tony. As she approaches, soft sobs slip out from underneath his door (which still has the T-O-N-Y stickers in red and gold they stuck up there on his 11th birthday), and it makes her heart squeeze. It seems… wrong for Tony to cry. He’s usually so full of life that it just… it’s wrong.
She gently knocks on the door thrice. Tony doesn’t respond, but she opens it anyway.
The room is pitch black, save for the moonlight filtering in through the window. Her eyes land on Tony’s trembling form, curled up on tightly on his bed that he looks more like a blob than an actual living person. “Not now, Nat,” he croaks, sniffling.
Natasha sighs, walking into his room and sitting down on the edge of his bed.
He shies away.
It hurts, but she tries not to let it show. “Tony, I’m not going to let you sit there and wallow–”
“Don’t pretend,” he cuts her off.
She swallows. “Don’t pretend?”
“Don’t pretend like you’re not affected!” he snaps, looking up at her with puffy, bloodshot eyes. “They were your parents too, Nat. My mom was your mom too.”
Natasha feels the wall she doesn’t even know she put up crack. She doesn’t–she didn’t–she can’t cry. That’s weak. (A small voice at the back of her head–Maria’s voice–tells her that it’s okay to cry. It’s natural. She shouldn’t hold it in.) But Tony’s words bounce and bounce and bounce around in her mind.
She watches as Tony rubs at his right eye with the heel of his palm.
“I’m not pretending,” she says, voice cracking at the end. She feels a tear slip out. “I’m not pretending.”
(The funeral service, to put it nicely, sucked. No one really knew who Natasha was, just that she seemed to be a friend of Tony’s. No one consoled her. No one told her that “Howard and Maria should be proud that they raised such a fine child.” Everyone focused on Tony. Everyone only knew Tony. She doesn’t resent him for that. She’s not jealous. But it would’ve been nice to hear someone–anyone–tell her that everything’ll be alright in the end.  
She gives the paparazzi deadly glares as she escorts Tony away from the service, hiding his face with her black jacket. “Vultures, all of them,” she hisses.
Underneath the jacket, Tony chuckles.)
Tony is 21 and Natasha is 25 when Tony becomes the CEO of Stark Industries, taking over Obadiah, an old family friend that Natasha never particularly liked.
“I don’t know,” Tony says, scrubbing the side of his face with his hand. “I’m not sure if this’ll work.” He stares down at the prototype of a missile system he’s working on. Jericho, he calls it.
“The weapon or the demonstration?” she asks from her spot curled up on a couch he has sitting down in the SI lab, scrolling down some webpage that claims to have the juiciest gossip on the most relevant celebrities of today. It’s her guilty pleasure; sue her.  
“Both,” Tony admits sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. He’s always been charming, he’s always known how to play to a crowd, but this would be his first major sale since… since the accident. It’d be his first major sale as the CEO. He needs to prove himself. Needs to show everyone that he’s more than just Howard Stark’s son. He’ll be the one to bring about world peace.
He can’t see it, but he just knows that Natasha is rolling her eyes. “It’ll be fine, Antoshka. You’re a smart man.”
He preens. Just a little.
“Plus, Rhodey’ll be there, right? It’ll be impossible for you to make a fool of yourself then.”
He pouts. Just a little.
Tony is still 21 and Natasha is still 25 when they meet Virginia “call me Pepper” Potts, a potential candidate to be Tony’s personal assistant.
“You should hire her,” Natasha says breathlessly after Pepper leaves her interview. She watches as the other’s perfectly styled ponytail swings side to side. “Her previous experience is much more extensive than the other candidates, plus her references had nothing but good things to say about her. She seems like the kind of professional, put-together person that you desp–”
“You think she’s pretty~” Tony lilts, giving her a shit-eating grin. He barely manages to get out of range when she swipes at him and laughs. “Don’t worry, I was already planning on hiring her anyway. She does seem like–what were you going to say–’the kind of professional, put-together person that I desperately need’?”
Natasha scoffs, kicking at his shin.
“I smell an office romance!” he giggles.
She kicks at him some more.
(Natasha does end up asking her out, but makes it clear that Pepper doesn’t have to accept if she doesn’t want to.
Pepper accepts, thankfully, and their first date is spent at eating at a deli and feeding the ducks at Central Park.
As Pepper laughs, Natasha thinks she’s never seen anyone more beautiful.)
Tony is 22 and Natasha is 26 when the Jericho demonstration does not go fine.
Rhodey calls her in a panic, saying that they lost Tony in Afghanistan after being attacked.
Her blood runs cold, heart plummeting to her stomach. She’s already lost Maria and Howard. If she loses Tony too, then… she doesn’t know what she’ll do. Her tentative relationship with Pepper is put on hold as she commandeers one of S.H.I.E.L.D’s jets and makes her way to Afghanistan as quickly as she can. Pepper, of course, has questions. Many of them, in fact. Such as: what is S.H.I.E.L.D and why does she seem to have so much pull in there? What is she hoping to achieve in Afghanistan that the U.S. Army can’t? Who is Tony to her?
Natasha promises to answer all of her questions when she comes back.
“It’s my fault,” Rhodey mumbles in the humvee on their way to the base, wiping tiredly at his eyes. “I left him alone. If I was with him–”
“You would have gotten killed,” Natasha says sympathetically, placing a comforting hand on Rhodey’s knee, “and that wouldn’t help him at all.” His guilt rolls off of him in waves, and she can tell that it’s eating him alive. She knows how that feels like.
Rhodey shakes his head and sighs for what seems like the nth time today. “Let’s just hope we find him.”
“That’s all we can hope.” She tries not to think about what might be happening to Tony. If his kidnappers were ballsy enough–powerful enough–to get to him past an armed escort, then there’s no telling what they’re capable of doing to him.
Tony’s not a trained spy. He doesn’t have the pain tolerance built up through years of harsh training. And he’s–he’s so stubborn, so firm in his stances that Natasha thinks nothing short of death would get him to cooperate.
She tries not to think about them finding a limp, breathless body.
(“They keep telling me to give up,” Rhodey whispers to her when they’re alone, an edge of frustration to his voice. “They keep telling me that he’s dead. That it’s a waste of resources–a waste of my time. But he’s not dead. I can–I can feel it, you know?”
Natasha nods solemnly. “I know.”
For both of their sakes, she hopes that he’s right.)
Tony is still 22 and Natasha is still 26 when they find Tony wandering the desert, 3 months later.
It’s Rhodey that spots him first, doing a double-take when he sees a figure frantically waving their arms in the sand down below.
“Tony?! Oh my god, that’s Tony!” he yells so loudly that Natasha is sure that they didn’t need the headsets to hear him all the way in the cockpit. “Land! Land right now!” He looks like he’s seconds away from jumping out of the helicopter himself, the vein in his neck bulging.
They land quick, the helicopter’s blades roaring above their head. She doesn’t even have time to unbuckle her seatbelt before Rhodey’s already jumping out, running with a couple of other soldiers towards… towards Tony.
By the time she’s out, Rhodey and Tony are embracing like a father and his child, Tony’s arms around Rhodey’s neck. Rhodey holds Tony tightly, bringing him close like he’s afraid Tony’s gonna fly away if he lets go.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” she hears him sob. It breaks her heart. “It’s my–it’s my–”
“No, Tones, no.” Rhodey pulls away from Tony, cupping the man’s face in his gloved hands. A bolt of shock jolts through Natasha’s body when she takes in how skinny his face is. “S’not your fault. None of this–none of what happened–is your fault.”
Tony closes his eyes and shakes his head, not believing a word of what Rhodey says. Natasha takes that time to kneel down next to the duo. “Hey, Tony,” she says softly.
Tony’s eyes fly open. “Nat?” His voice sounds downright pitiful as he stares at her with disbelieving wide eyes. “You’re… here, am I hallucinating?”
Rhodey manages to laugh, although it’s more to lighten the mood than to express amusement. “No. She’s really here. Stole a S.H.I.E.L.D jet and everything.”
“Commandeered a jet, Colonel Rhodes,” she amends.
Rhodey grins. “She stole it.”
Tony doesn’t say anything, looking at the both of them in a dazed confusion, mouth slightly agape. “So–so… this has nothing to do with how I haven’t had anything to drink for the last few days?”
Natasha raises an eyebrow.
A split second later, she finds herself with an armful of Tony. He’s shaking so badly that Natasha is afraid he’s gonna turn himself into the sand that surrounds them. Rhodey is stroking Tony’s neck, whispering comforting words as Tony continues to shiver.
Part of Natasha hopes that the people who did this to him are still alive.
She wants to kill them herself.
Tony is still 22 and Natasha is still 26 when Tony tells her about the arc reactor and the shrapnel. About Yinsen. About him being Iron Man.
“I shouldn’t be alive,” he says, sounding far too fragile than she’s comfortable with. If she takes a step closer, he looks he might break. “Unless it was for a reason. I’m not crazy, Nat. I just finally know what I have to do, and in my heart… I know it’s right.”
Natasha swallows. Her little brother–god, that’s weird–is out there, barely old enough to drink, risking his life on a daily basis to try and make up for the things he did before, all the weapons and the bloodshed and… and it reminds her of her.
She has yet to see if that’s a good thing.
(They also decide to tell Pepper and Harold “Happy” Hogan, Tony’s sort-of bodyguard, the truth about their relationship.
“Oh. So, I’m dating your sister,” Pepper says calmly, but Natasha knows that she’s exploding inside with even more questions. Happy looks at Pepper weirdly, like he can’t believe that peppy, sprightly Pepper is dating brooding, silent Natasha. Natasha can’t say she blames him.
“Okay. That’s… okay. I’ll be good to her, Tony.” Pepper smiles reassuringly, but Natasha can tell it’s more like she’s reassuring herself than her brother. It’s not everyday that you find out that your girlfriend also happens to be the adopted sister of your boss who could probably buy your entire life with a snap of his fingers.
Yeah. She can see how that might be strange.
“You better be!” Tony exclaims with no real heat behind it. He likes Pepper too much to actually threaten her.)
Tony is still 22 and Natasha is still 26 when they find out Obadiah Stane was behind Tony’s kidnapping and subsequent torture.
Natasha wasn’t there when Pepper pushed the button that fried Obadiah, but god she wishes that she was.
(Tony reveals who he is shortly after.
“Is he always like this?” Coulson exasperatedly asks Natasha. The reporters are busy yelling and screaming and shouting, nearly trampling each other in an attempt to get closer to Tony. Tony looks over at the two of them and actually smiles, that idiot.
Natasha smirks. “You have no idea.”)
Tony is 23 and Natasha is 27 when Tony starts dying from palladium poisoning.
He doesn’t tell anyone. Only J.A.R.V.I.S knows. Rhodey… Rhodey kind of knows. The only thing he’s aware of is that the palladium burns quick, it burns ugly, and it leaves a stupid-looking futuristic crossword puzzle crawling up his neck.
Tony goes on a bender. Starts drinking heavily even though he would barely touch a wine cooler when he was younger (thanks to Natasha). He shows up to board meetings sloshed and his signatures are barely legible.
(He locks himself in his lab and sobs, clawing at his chest and cursing the ironic powers that be for bestowing upon him an object that simultaneously saves and kills him.)
He makes Pepper C.E.O when she comes down to his lab to confront him about his recent behavior. Immediately, she asks if he’s okay. She places a cool palm on Tony’s forehead. “You’re scaring me, Tony,” she chokes out. They haven’t been working together for that long, but she sees Tony as the little brother she’s never had. “The way you’re acting… it’s like you’re dying.”
Tony scoffs, swatting away Pepper’s hand. “M’not, don’t worry. You won’t be getting rid of me that easily.” Now would be a good test of the acting skills Natasha taught him when they were younger. “Just… I don’t think I can handle the stress of running SI and, you know, doing the other thing at the same time.”
Pepper nods stiffly. She doesn’t fully believe him, he can tell, but she also doesn’t want to push the matter further. She steps back, giving Tony space. “C.E.O?” she sniffs, the corner of her mouth curling up in partial amusement.
“Yes!” he enthusiastically shouts, sounding relieved. “Ms. C.E.O, I think we need to celebrate!” He waves a hand, and DUM-E comes rolling in, chirping happily while carrying a platter of sliced meats and cheeses. U follows close behind with a bucket filled to the brim with ice, a bottle of expensive champagne, and 2 crystal wine glasses.
(People start to speculate as to why Tony would step down as C.E.O of SI when they’re just starting to build their stocks up again. Pepper, poor Pepper, is just pretty enough that they start saying she’s Tony’s illicit lover who’s taking advantage of his loneliness to take over Stark Industries.
“As if!” Tony throws the paper into the trash, hands clapping together the second it lands. “I don’t see how people can believe this bullshit!”
Pepper snickers, daintily covering her laughter with a hand. “I know! You’re not even my type.”
Natasha strolls over, pressing a kiss to Pepper’s temple. “We all know you prefer redheads.” She sits herself down in Pepper’s lap, tucking her head under Pepper’s chin.
Tony groans, turning his entire body away from the affectionate couple. “My god, get a room!”)
He lets Rhodey take the Iron Man armor. He wasn’t even drunk; all he had in that flask was a bunch of apple juice, but acting drunk was cathartic in a way.
He hears the pain in Rhodey’s voice when Rhodey tells him that he doesn’t need to do this.
All he remembers after that is a bright flash, Rhodey taking off, and then darkness. He doesn’t know how long he lies in the rubble that used to be his living room, but he does know that he’d fucked up.
(“You’re dying,” Natasha hisses, slamming both of her hands down on his desk. Despite the sting in her words, her eyes are soft, if a bit calculating. “Does anyone else know?”
Tony doesn’t even flinch, eyes looking around the room–looking at anything but her. He expected this kind of reaction. “No,” he grits out. “Only me. And J.A.R.V.I.S. And now you. How did you know?” He swore J.A.R.V.I.S to secrecy and made sure to leave nothing lying about that could even suggest that he’s ill.
“We know the symptoms of palladium poisoning, Antoshka,” Natasha says, gently now.
Tony tilts his head. “We?”
At that moment, the door slides open. A rather severe-looking African-American man walks in, a patch over his left eye. “You’re not an easy man to get an audience with, Stark.”
Tony’s face flashes with betrayal, and Natasha would feel bad for being the one who put it there if she didn’t think that Tony needed this. “I told you, I don’t want to join your super-secret boy band,” he mumbles, sinking in his seat.
Fury grins.)
He synthesizes a new element, thanks to Howard (and somewhat thanks to the pain-in-the-ass Nick Fury).
It feels good. His blood no longer feels like acid and he can breathe, damn it.
He’s never felt better.
(“Natasha was the one who recommended you, you know,” Fury says, tapping his fingers on the metal desk melodically.
Tony thinks back to Natasha calling S.H.I.E.L.D a “circus run by monkeys–except that monkeys would probably do better!” and snorts.
Fury picks up a pen and twirls it slowly, never taking his eye off of Tony. “She sees something in you, Stark. I don’t know what it is, but she sees something.” He places the pen down with a click. “Don’t disappoint her.”)
Tony is 24 and Natasha is 28 when the Avengers are assembled.
Natasha can’t say that she’s fond of the way Steve talks to Tony like he’s not deserving of his title, but she tries to keep her cool. The last thing she needs is for them to bombard her with questions as to why she’s so defensive of Tony.
But, just to let the others know that Tony is under her protection, she lets them see the way she brushes his bangs from his eyes, the way she allows him to sprawl over her on the couch, and the way she generally lets him get away with things that she would flay other people alive for.
(“You think she likes Stark?” Steve grunts, leaning his hip against a table in some lab that S.H.I.E.L.D set them up in and crossing his arms. Things could get complicated if she does, and they really don’t need anything else to add to the volatile stew that is their team chemistry.
Bruce clicks his tongue and makes a show of stepping away from Steve. “Sorry, but I’m not about to get involved in that kind of speculation,” he says, although his tone doesn’t make him seem actually apologetic. He rubs his hands together. “But, um, speculation about that blue-glowy thingy? I’m all up for that.”)
Their confusion amuses her. Yes, she know all about the theories they have about her and Tony’s relationship. (She tries not to retch every time she hears one.) They need to tell the others soon.
But for now, she supposes she can have some fun in confusing them even more. When Pepper visits, she makes sure to up her usual affectionate gestures whenever they’re in eyesight of one of the Avengers. Back hugs, kisses on the cheek and temple, and whispers of sweet nothings in Pepper’s ear.
(“Perhaps they are all in a relationship together,” Thor offers, shrugging his shoulders. “It is not an uncommon practice on Asgard, as long as all parties consent. I have seen relationships that consist of more than 2 people.”
Steve stares at the table. Bruce continues to tap at some hologram. “Speculation,” Bruce sighs out.)
Tony is still 24 and Natasha is still 28 when Tony does something stupidly heroic–emphasis on stupid–and flies a nuke into a wormhole.
The right side of her head is matted with blood and sweat, and the left corner of her mouth stings like nothing else. Her head continues to pound as she throws the scepter to the ground. Everything fucking hurts.
But none of that pain compares to watching as Tony falls out of that wormhole, body limp.
(She’s just glad he was able to fall out before it closed, because if he got stuck up there, she’d have to live knowing that she’s the reason.)
Thor swings by, carrying her down to the ground, but her eyes stay glued on Tony. She knows she’s gripping onto Thor’s bicep a bit too hard, her nails digging into his skin, but he’s a god. He can take it.
Banner, thankfully, doesn’t seem inclined to let Tony turn into a red-and-gold splat on the pavement as he catches Tony’s falling body before it hits the ground. She rubs at her forehead, stress building up in the back of her head.
She, Thor, and Steve run over and kneel near his body. Thor rips off Tony’s mask, revealing his pale face, both of his eyes closed. Quietly, she gasps, sitting down on the backs of her legs, eyes raking up and down his body. She takes in the damage done to his suit and prays that Tony’s just unconscious instead of… instead of something else.
Steve leans over Tony’s chest, trying to hear a heartbeat or the sound of breathing or anything that would say Tony’s alive.
Tony doesn’t open his eyes.
Before Natasha–or Steve, if the way he’s staring intently at Tony’s mouth is anything to go by–can start on CPR, Banner roars and Tony is jolted awake with a gasp.
“Alright, hey!” Tony says weakly after being informed of their victory. “Good job guys. And Nat!” He does a pathetic attempt at a finger gun, barely able to lift his hand more than a few inches off the ground.
Natasha snorts. She’d hit him on the forehead if she wasn’t afraid of some underlying injury.
He struggles to swallow, smacking his lips before talking. “You ever try shawarma? There’s a shawarma joint about 2 blocks from here.”
Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Steve smile. Maybe they’ll get along after all.
Tony is still 24 and Natasha is still 28 when Tony is thought dead after an attack on his Malibu mansion–an attack that Natasha knew was going to come, but couldn’t do anything about.
“He could still be alive,” she says as a statement rather than a bid to placate, wrapping her arm around Pepper’s waist as they stare out of a window in some hotel room that Pepper booked. She’s seen Tony get up and dust himself off after a near-death incident one too many times for her to be comfortable with, but it gives her hope that he’s survived. It’s gonna take more than a few missiles and half of his mansion to take down Tony.
Pepper wipes at the corner of her eyes. “I’m going back to the mansion in the morning–or what–what was the mansion. I’ll see if… if there’s anything we can save.” Her sniffles die down, and she leans into Natasha’s hold.
(Then Pepper tells her about the message Tony left her. He’s alive.
That’s all Natasha needs to know.)
Tony is still 24 and Natasha is still 28 when Pepper is kidnapped, injected with Extremis, is subsequently removed of any trace of Extremis, and Tony gets the shrapnel removed.
Tony dusts off DUM-E and U and Butterfingers, cooing something about how they’re okay, how dad’s here. “I’m still Iron Man, you know!” Tony says to the both of them, twirling around in his seat before fitting a DUNCE cap on DUM-E.
“You’re a child, is what you are,” Pepper teases. She bites her bottom lip afterward to keep herself from bursting into another round of tears. It’s been an emotional sort of week.
Natasha kisses her cheek, returning her girlfriend’s grateful smile. “I agree with Pepper.” She tucks a stray lock of Pepper’s hair behind her ear.
“Unfair!” Tony protests, bursting their reality bubble. “She’s your girlfriend, of course you’re always gonna agree with her!”
Tony is 26 and Natasha is 30 when Natasha finds out the truth of how their parents died.
Steve gulps. “I don’t think we should tell Tony about this,” he whispers to Natasha, hand on her forearm. They’re so close to finding Bucky–so goddamn close–and this revelation certainly throws a wrench into their plans. “If he finds out, he would never–”
Natasha swallows down a ball of fury. “Tell him,” she says sharply, looking at him with as much fire as she can muster. He blinks, grip loosening. “You need to tell him. You think his reaction right now will be bad?–” she shakes her head, glare never leaving his face– “It will pale in comparison to his reaction if you keep hiding this from him and he has to find out himself.” She thinks back to her own painful confession she made back when she was younger, the kind of confession that can break families. She’s just grateful it didn’t break hers.
Steve purses his lips. “Why can’t you tell him then?” He holds out the flip phone and waggles it insistently.
She pushes it to the side, unwilling to let Steve run away from this. If she was able to make that confession when she was 14, he can do it now. “It’s not my best friend that did this. I’m not the one using Tony’s money to fund this chase. Tell him, Rogers.” She jabs at his chest with a finger, ignoring the way he winces. “Or I’ll make you.”
Steve closes his eyes and takes a few deep breaths, exhaling slowly on the last one. He flips open the phone with just enough force to not break it in half and dials a number. “Tony?” he says into the receiver, eyes flickering to Natasha, “We need to talk. In person.”
A satisfied smile works its way onto her face.
(The smile drops when Steve turns his back. She clutches at her chest, a burning in there she hasn’t felt since that cold December night.
It wasn’t actually James, she tells herself, he was brainwashed. It wasn’t actually him.
She breathes in shakily. It wasn’t him.)
Tony is still 26 and Natasha is still 30 when Tony finds out the truth of how their parents died.
His eyes turn into steel and his walls build themselves back up. “Fuck off, Rogers,” he snarls, words turning into knives trying to find a chink in Steve’s armor. He starts to walk off, but he’s stopped when Steve grabs his wrist. As much as he struggles, he’s no match for Steve’s enhanced strength. “Let go.” His eyes flash dangerously and the bracelet on his other wrist beeps, ready to call the Iron Man armor.
“Tony, he was brainwashed–used by HYDRA,” Steve desperately says, staring Tony in the eyes in hopes that those words would sway Tony’s feelings.
“He killed my mom–” Tony’s voice cracks on the last word.
Steve shakes Tony’s wrist, tugging him closer. “It wasn’t him. He was being used as a weapon. Tony, please,” he pleads.
Tony blinks wetly. “Does Natasha know?” he asks quietly.
Steve nods, confused. “She–she does. Why?”
Something blazes in Tony’s eyes. “She told you to tell me, didn’t she?” His tone is borderline accusatory. “Would you have told me if she didn’t ask you to?” he asks, searching Steve’s eyes. He wants his answer to be yes. He wants to know that his trust in Steve wasn’t misplaced, because honestly? This is… this is a fucking mess.
Steve stays silent.
He lets Tony’s wrist slip out of his hand as Tony walks away.
(“He told you,” Natasha bluntly says as she enters Tony’s lab, J.A.R.V.I.S turning down the Metallica blasting from the speakers.
Tony throws a screwdriver across the room, probably breaking something that costs more than what most people make in a month. “I wish he didn’t. Could’ve–could’ve just left me in blissful ignorance.” He angrily runs a hand through his hair, curling into himself.
Natasha walks over, picking up a screwdriver for herself. “You would’ve wanted to know, Tony. Don’t lie to yourself.” Like Tony, she throws it. Except this time, it embeds itself into the wall, startling Tony. “Steve was right. It wasn’t him.”
“How can you defend him?!” Tony explodes, standing up from his stool so quickly it knocks over.
“Because I’m not being a child, Tony!” Natasha snaps back, heart squeezing when Tony flinches and steps back, nearly tripping over the stool. “I told you–Steve’s been telling you–it wasn’t James. I know you’re angry. I was angry. But, Tony… you can’t blame him for this.”
He looks away, jaw clenching. “Just go.”
“Antoshka–”
“Go!”)
Tony is 27 and Natasha is 31 when Steve brings Bucky home.
She finds herself getting quite close to the ex-assassin. She helps him adjust to the modern era, whether that means accompanying him whenever he ventures outside or simply making a list of his basic needs. Sometimes they spar; it’s nice to be able to test her skills against someone on the same level.
(Tony is still awkward around the other man. Outside of regular arm maintenance sessions, the most Bucky gets from him is stilted smiles and jokes that fall flat. It’s enough to make even her cringe.)
“How… how can I get Tony to be more comfortable around me?” Bucky asks quietly, swirling a glass of orange juice as the both of them stand in the communal kitchen.
Natasha raises an eyebrow as she looks at him. Where in the world did that question come from? “You just have to give him time.”
However, that seems like the wrong answer as a gentle crease forms between his brows. “Give him time? After what I did to him, I don’t think all the time in the world could help.” He lets out a breathy laugh, sounding near hysterical at the thought of Tony disliking him.
She has to bite her tongue to prevent herself from saying that she warmed up to Bucky just fine even after what he did. “Why do you seem care so much?” she asks, genuinely curious. “You’ve never tried to talk to him before.”
Bucky shuffles on his feet, flushing just slightly. “He’s kind,” he starts, “an’ generous. From what I’ve seen, he’s… he’s a real hero.” He rubs the back of his neck with his free hand, already sufficiently embarrassed. “He doesn’t deserve to be scared in his own house.” Vulnerability shines through his voice.
Natasha thinks there’s more to it than just that, but she leaves it be. “He’ll come around.”
Tony is still 27 and Natasha is still 31 when Tony starts coming around. (Natasha’s refuses to take credit for it.)
It starts as Tony actively trying to converse with Bucky more, seeming determined to talk to him for longer than 10 seconds. His smiles become less and less forced, and his jokes actually get a laugh now. Hell, sometimes he even brings Bucky coffee in the mornings (though it’s obvious that Tony himself hasn’t slept yet).
Routine arm maintenance used to take 10 minutes; Bucky could go down to the lab and come back up before the commercial breaks for Cake Boss are over, but now? It drags on for hours as they talk and talk and talk about anything and everything they can think of. Bucky always comes back up with a lovesick look on his face (and Clint and Sam razz him about it any chance they get).
Tony even starts to invite Bucky to the Lord of the Rings and Star Wars marathons he hosts for a local community center near weekly; in fact, he starts calling himself Bucky’s official teacher on the pop culture of the 21st century. It’s not unusual to walk in on Tony excitedly explaining the plot of Stargate Atlantis or giving a basic rundown on the accuracies and inaccuracies used in shows like Star Trek to Bucky.
And Bucky listens to all of it, a smitten smile on his face.
Their shoulders and elbows touch whenever they sit together on the couch. They trade whispers and shy smiles like they’re the only people in the room. Bucky looks at Tony like he hangs the sun, while Tony looks at Bucky like he’s the moon and stars all wrapped up in one person.
It’s so obvious to everyone but them.
(“Do you think Buck’ll ever make a move?” Steve whispers to Natasha, sounding like a tired older brother as he glances at Bucky and Tony get close to each other on the couch and start their oft-talked about Mythbusters session. “Hell, do you think either of them’ll make a move?”
The corner of Natasha’s mouth curls up. “I doubt it.” She knows the both of them. They’d rather do a little dance around each other until the day they die than confront the other about their feelings.
Steve’s eyes hood, unamused. “Yeah. I doubt it too.”)
Tony is still 27 and Natasha is still 31 when Bucky tells Natasha how he feels (as if she didn’t already know the second Bucky threw those heart-eyes in Tony’s direction).
“He’s gorgeous, Natasha,” Bucky groans during one of their yoga sessions. He blows a strand of hair out of his face, grumbling something about ponytails and their uselessness.
Natasha hums, lowering her pelvis down to the ground, switching to the cobra pose. “He is handsome, isn’t he?”
Bucky follows her lead. Something in his back pops, and he hopes it’s a good kind of pop and not the you-messed-something-up-bad pop. “He has–he has the prettiest eyes I’ve ever seen.” Natasha glances at him, expression unreadable, and he stiffens. “I mean, uh…” He thinks back to what the other Avengers have whispered about Natasha and Tony and frowns. “…You don’t–”
“I don’t have a crush on Tony, no,” Natasha says, irritated. God, they really need to tell the others soon. She loves Tony, she really does, but not like that. Ew. “You’re good for him, though.”
Bucky nods, his hair bun wagging up and down. He didn’t even know that he was searching for Natasha’s approval, but he feels so much better now that he has it. “Thanks. I’m… I’m hoping that I can make him happy.”
(Then he clears his throat. “So, I guess you wouldn’t mind if I said that he had a nice butt?” he tries to joke, but Natasha can tell he’s being serious.
A significantly more taxing, intense regime pops up in her mind. Totally a coincidence, she swears.)
Tony is still 27 and Natasha is still 31 when they decide to tell the Avengers the truth.
Pepper is there for moral support, holding Natasha’s hand and whispering encouragements into her ear.
“Oh, man,” Clint mumbles, fiddling with an arrow he retrieved from his quiver. “So, those rumors… oh man, that’s bad.” He refuses to look either Tony or Natasha in the eye, instead settling for staring at his scuffed boots.
Tony snorts. “Yeah. It is. We’ve been meaning to tell you guys, it’s just that we keep forgetting. Y’know, ‘cause we’re idiots–” Natasha gives him the stink eye– “uh, actually, I’m the idiot. I’m the only idiot.”
“It makes sense,” Bruce says, twiddling his thumbs. “You two are too close to be just friends, but you two are obviously not like that. Yeah, I see it.”
Tony beams at Bruce. “I always knew you were the smart one, Brucie!”
Bucky, meanwhile, seems to be having a breakdown in the corner of the room. Steve is trying futilely to calm him down. “I shouldn’t have said that,” he cringes, face scrunching up.
“Said what?” Steve tilts his head to the side.
“I told… I told Natasha I thought Tony had a nice butt,” Bucky admits, head hanging low.
But he must’ve said that louder than he thought because everyone turns around to look at him. Bruce manages to look sympathetic, but Clint and Sam are wheezing and slapping their knees. Thor looks like he might die of embarrassment along with Bucky–a side-effect of being empathetic, Bucky supposes.
“You think I have a nice butt?” Tony blurts out, cheeks turning a rosy red.
Before Bucky can reply, Natasha stands up. He gulps and all but leaps out of his seat. “I’m gonna go–” he breathes out, sounding terrified– “I’m gonna go!” Steve can only watch as Bucky bolts out of the room, hair frazzled and his jacket slipping off of one of his shoulders.
Natasha cackles as she sits back down.
Tony is 29 and Natasha is 33 when some aliens land on earth demanding the Infinity Stones.
Despite Bucky and Natasha’s protests, Tony hops on one of their spaceships.
And doesn’t come back down.
Tony is still 29 and Natasha is still 33 when she witnesses everyone around her turning to ash.
She wonders how she’s going to tell Tony about Sam. About Bucky. She chokes on her grief.
Looking up at the sky, she hopes that Tony was spared–she hopes that he’s alive.
When Steve tries to talk to her, all that comes out is a sob.
Her tears hit the forest floor.
Tony is still 29 and Natasha is still 33 when he finally makes his way back down to Earth after near a goddamn month of being missing.
Rhodey and Pepper rush to his side. Thin, is the first thing that pops into her mind, far too thin. The next thing is how much good a heaping plateful of Maria’s risotto would do him. She shakes her head at that thought and jogs over to join the trio.
(”Nat,” Tony croaks, sagging into her side as she takes Steve’s place. “Nat.” He looks up at her through thin eyelashes, his cheeks sunken, with a sickly grey undertone to his skin. “You’re okay.”
“I am okay,” she whispers, frowning as she wraps one of her hands around Tony’s wrists. Definitely too thin.)
Tony is still 29 and Natasha is still 33 when all of them start to look for a way to reverse the snap.
Natasha watches as Tony slaves over some blueprint, hooked up to an IV drip. Trying to get him to eat, drink, or rest is near impossible short of shoving the food and water down his throat or sedating him. He squints at the holographic screen in front of him before yelling, frustrated, and swiping it all away.
She gets up and walks over to him as he curls up into a ball in his wheelchair. “Let Bruce take a crack at it.”
“It’s outside his area of expertise,” he mumbles, form shivering slightly.
“I know. But you at least get a break.”
(”Are you… really doing okay, Nat?” Tony asks around his mouthful of peanut butter sandwich. It was less of a struggle to get Tony to eat this time around, but Natasha suspects it largely might have been out of pity.
She pauses with her glass of water halfway to her mouth. “Am I fine?” she ponders. All those people. Gone. The family that she’s built up. Gone. She could’ve done more. Something. Anything to spare them all from the pain of losing a loved one–a spouse, child, sibling.
She takes a sip, closes her eyes, and recomposes herself. “Yes.”)
Tony is 32 and Natasha is 36 when they take a small stroll down to the convenience store that’s only being kept open due to its diligent owner and the fact that Tony drops a couple hundred bucks in there every time they go.
“Can I ask you something?” Tony picks up a Snickers bar and turns it over, checking under the flap for the expiration date. Even with half the world gone, they’re still pretty careful with stocking non-expired products, but Tony doesn’t particularly feel like gambling today.
Natasha hums, throwing every variety of Lays into her shopping basket.
“When are you gonna propose to Pep already?” He lets the question rush out before ducking behind the shelves. He’s learned to never underestimate the force at which Natasha can throw things, not even when it comes to cellophane bags that are more air than actual product.
“Tony!” she growls, going on her tiptoes to look over the aisles and find the tell-tale tousle of Tony’s hair. She finds him cowering next to the Sour Patch Kids and launches a well-aimed bag of barbecue flavored chips at his head.
“Just propose!” he whoops, laughing as the bag bounces off of his head and tumbles down onto the floor.
She joins in on his happiness, and in the back of her mind she realizes how much she misses this. How much she misses being normal. Or as normal as someone like her can get, anyway.
(”We should get married,” Natasha casually says as she and Pepper lounge on the couch, watching old, old videos on YouTube.
Startled, Pepper jolts upright, looking at Natasha with wide eyes and her mouth agape. “Are you– are you being serious?” She looks like she’s torn between kissing Natasha senseless or yelling at her because what kind of proposal is that.
“Not right now, of course, because I know you would want to invite everybody…” she trails off, the ‘everybody who was dusted’ lingering in the air. “But we should, at a point.”
“Do I at least get a ring?” Pepper ribs.
Natasha shows off a kiwi-flavored Ring Pop. “Brand new. In its wrapper, even.”)
Tony is 34 and Natasha is 38 when Tony bursts into her and Pepper’s room in the middle of the night, eyes wide and bright off of the high of a brand new discovery.
“You won’t believe this!” he exclaims as he excitedly jumps into their bed like he’s 10 again and trying to wake Natasha up on Christmas morning. “You won’t– I can barely believe it!”
Pepper grunts, displeased, while Natasha’s eyes flutter open. She’s known Tony long enough to know that he won’t stop babbling unless someone sits down and listens to him. “What?” Her voice is rough from sleep, and she can barely see past the blur in her eyes, but that doesn’t stop Tony from tugging her up into a sitting position.
“You remember Scott?” He’s breathless, giddy. “His entire time travel thing?”
She nods slowly. “Yes. You called it bullshit.”
“Except that it isn’t!” He points, index finger trembling, towards the wide open door, a pale blue light washing over the doorframe. “I think… I think I figured it out.”
Natasha scrambles out of bed so quickly that she nearly knocks Tony off and pulls on one of Pepper’s jackets that’s hanging over a chair. “Show me,” she says, voice stained with hope.
Tony smiles.
(”Antoshka,” she breathes out, fondness seeping through in every syllable of the endearment. “This is amazing.” Her eyes roam every inch of the blueprint, hungrily soaking up every single detail from the notes written in tiny font to the side of the screen to the giant, green text proclaiming the success rate to be 99.9%.
He engulfs her in a sudden hug, and, as soon as it happens, it’s over, his hands resting on the sides of her biceps. “We can bring them back!” His eyes shine, and she too begins to feel a prickling behind her eyes.
“We can bring them back,” she repeats, grinning proudly.)
Tony is still 34 and Natasha is still 38 when they get the time machine up and running, having spent countless hours engrossed in heavy lifting and wire connecting.
They have a plan. 3 teams. 6 stones. 1 chance.
“Come back safe.” Pepper presses a gentle kiss on Natasha’s cheek, tucking a lock of red-blond hair behind her ear. “Bring them back. We’re going to have a summer wedding.”
“I fully expect to be the best man!” Tony pipes up from where he’s talking with Steve and Rhodey, looking at the both of them with a hint of wistfulness in his eyes.
Pepper smiles at him, biting her bottom lip like she always does. “We wouldn’t have anyone else.”
Natasha draws her in for another kiss.
(”Vormir, right?” Clint twirls his sword.
Natasha nods. “That’s where we find the soul stone. Rhodey and Nebula will take care of the power stone.”
If Nebula’s jaw clenches at the mention of Vormir, of 2 of her teammates going there, not fully knowing the price that is to be paid, no one notices.)
Tony is still 34 and Natasha is still 38 when Natasha and Clint land on Vormir and are faced with an agonizing choice.
They argue for what feels like hours, trying to justify why it should be them and not the other, until they stand together, forehead to forehead in one last comforting gesture.
Then, Clint flips her onto her back, knocking the wind out of her. “Tell my family I love them,” he says, ready to start running towards the cliff.
Natasha turns the tables, bringing him down harder and faster. “Tell them yourself.” She sprints, braid whipping in the wind.
It’s a scuffle, a full-on brawl as they try to beat the other to the edge, to be the one who gives their life for the salvation of the universe. Clint gets close, so, so close. He can taste the ice in the air, the snow, the iron that’ll fill his mouth once his head makes contact with the ground. He jumps.
Natasha tackles him, slaps the other end of her grappling hook on Clint’s waist and comes to an abrupt stop as Clint holds onto her wrist in a death grip, keeping the both of them suspended in the air, braced against the cliffside. “Damn you,” he chokes out, pulse racing. He reaches out towards her with his free hand, but the stress on his hip is too much, too painful, he retracts it, holding back onto the wire of the grappling hook.
She looks behind her, at the ground below. “Let me go,” she says. There’s no fear in her eyes, and that scares Clint shitless. She looks reassuring, accepting, expecting.
“No.” He grimaces, the strain of keeping both himself and Natasha from plummeting starting to take its toll. He’ll hold onto her all day if he has to. Some of the others will come. They’ll find another way. There has to be another way. “Please, no.”
She nods softly, understandingly. “It’s okay.” He can barely hear her over the blood rushing in his ears, but her words just serve for him to tighten his grip more.
Before he can react, she kicks off of the cliffside, tearing her wrist from Clint’s grasp.
He’s forced to watch as she falls.
(The wind rushes around her, cold and biting. Her heart threatens to leap out of her chest. Clint becomes nothing more than a speck in her vision.
She spreads her arms, thoughts racing at a million miles per hour in her head. No goodbyes, no apologies. People like her don’t get happy endings. She was foolish for thinking that she might have been the exception.
She hopes that Pepper will forgive her. She hopes that Tony will forgive her. She hopes.
In her last second, she thinks only of her family.
And she smiles.)
Tony is still 34 and Natasha is– Natasha is… when they come back.
Tony’s the first one to notice. “Where’s Nat?” He tilts his head to the side in question. Could she be running late? A bit odd, but given how experimental this entire process is, it’s not entirely implausible.
But Clint looks at him with so sorrow and grief and apology in his eyes, his jaw wound shut so tightly that Tony’s almost afraid he might turn his teeth into dust. He thinks he knows what might have happened. He hopes to god that he’s wrong. “Clint?” he ventures again, “where’s Natasha?”
Clint looks away, his adam’s apple bobbing and throat clicking as he swallows.
That’s all Tony needs. His hands start to tremble and terrible, hiccuping sobs start to pour out of his throat as his eyes glue themselves onto the ground. His knees buckle, and he would’ve fallen onto the ground had it not been for Steve’s steadying hands.
After all they’ve been through.
He didn’t even get to say goodbye.
(Pepper shoves her face into the crook of his neck, bawling her eyes out as she hugs him fiercely, like he might disappear too. Her snot and tears get all over the fabric, but instead of being disgusted, he rubs her back soothingly, his own tears rolling down his cheeks. He can’t help but to think that it should’ve been him instead.
As he holds Pepper in his arms, he wonders, briefly, if this was how Natasha felt whenever she’d comfort him after a bad dream or when Howard was a bit too harsh. “We’re gonna be okay,” he croons.
It doesn’t really hit him until he’s staring out over a lake with the other Avengers that Natasha is well and truly gone. She’s not gonna tease him anymore. She’s not gonna be the one to listen to his incessant ramblings when no one else will. She’s not gonna make him her signature borscht or spends hours with him eating pepperoni pizza and watching trashy reality TV.
He’s known her for all of his life.
When she died, a piece of him did too.)
Tony is still 34 and Natasha is dead and gone, and she’s never coming back when Thanos comes into the future with his dumb golden armor after Bruce snapped his fingers using the gauntlet Tony built in his basement–take a goddamn seat, Thanos.
Everyone comes back.
(Except Natasha.)
Everyone helps.
(Except Natasha.)
Everyone is relieved to see each other again.
(Except Natasha.)
He fights, just a touch too much on the side of recklessness, blasting and carving and flying his way through swaths of Outriders. He falls. He gets bent, dented, bruised, and scraped, but he finds his way. He even manages to give Bucky a relieved kiss when they cross paths.
Carol is close to the time-machine-van when Thanos issues his orders to blow everything up. He braces himself as he lands on his stomach.
The Gauntlet tumbles and tumbles and Thanos reaches for it, but he tackles him, effectively buying them some precious few seconds before being punched back out. He glances at the good, ol’ Doctor Strange out of the corner of his eye while Thor and Carol are busy doing what they do.
Strange holds up one scarred finger, and Tony knows exactly what he’s supposed to do.
He rushes at Thanos and fumbles with the Gauntlet. He’s pushed away, flat on his ass as Thanos smirks, relishing in his victory over the weak Terrans. “I am inevitable,” he taunts.
Snap.
Nothing.
Tony holds up his right hand, the Infinity Stones taking hold in his makeshift gauntlet as their power courses through his body. 1 chance. “And I–” he takes a rattling breath– “am Iron Man.”
He snaps his fingers.
Tony is still 34 and Natasha is waiting on the other side for him as he sits against the metal carcass of a ship.
Rhodey has tears free falling down his face as he places an armored hand over Tony’s left cheek, and Tony would laugh, tease his platypus about being so emotional over him if he wasn’t in so much fucking pain. His entire right side is burnt so badly it’s numb, and the nerves that haven’t fully died yet are giving off yeah, we’re hurt super goddamn badly signals.
He can’t even talk.
Bucky and Pepper rush over, and Jesus Christ, Bucky basically slides on his knees for the last couple of feet. “He’ll be fine,” Bucky says, although it’s more of a statement than a question. Figures that Tony would fall in love with the one person who’s more stubborn than he is.
Pepper shakes her head and reaches out to grab Bucky’s metal hand with her own. She doesn’t say anything, just reaches out to rub at Tony’s shoulder.
“He’ll be fine,” Bucky insists.
Tony starts to slip, slip, and slip, his breaths becoming more ragged and his chest becoming tighter. His vision starts to fade, and he feels… peaceful. Like all of this weight has been lifted off of his shoulders.
“He’s at rest,” Pepper whispers.
The last thing he registers is Bucky’s chapped lips pressing against his forehead.
Tony was 34 and Natasha was 38 when they saved the world.
Somewhere, they meet again.
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crowdedimagines · 4 years
Text
Falling - Harry Styles
*obviously inspired by Falling, which i am OBSESSED with! *italics are from the past, a lot of this story will be from the past. *also, see if you catch some mini easter eggs to other songs from fine line (this wasn’t intentional, but for the timeline to work he never dated camille)
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There’s no point in stopping the tears as they slowly stream down my face. As soon as I saw the tracklist to Harry’s new album I had a feeling this one would bring on the waterworks. Now that the album is officially released, I can hear what he’s been working on the past few months.
Falling.
A simple word with so much meaning behind it. It’s hard to fight off the memories of our relationship.
“-and this is the lovely, Y/n.” A friend introduces me to a small group of her friends at the party. She managed to drag me away from a conversation I was having to ‘meet some friends’. I smile and wave to all of the new faces, they go around and give me their names in return.
“Harry.” The last one speaks up, he raises his glass in a wave.
Our eyes pull together like magnets. I’m thankful for the darker lighting that is hiding the blush that creeps over my cheeks.
We all quickly dive into a conversation, everyone present being easy enough to talk to. They’re all lovely and fun people.
“I’m gonna go get another drink.” I announce as I get up from my spot.
“I’ll come with, mine seems to be empty too.” Harry grins and follows me back to the bar.
We both order our drinks and wait for them to be made. It takes a while, seeing how busy it is with all of the people here, but neither Harry or I mind. We immediately jump into a new conversation ranging from music, acting, and travel.
“You’ve never been to the UK?” Harry asks, utterly shocked.
“No.” I shake my head, laughing at his appalled reaction.
“How is that even possible? You’ve never had to film over there or anything?”
“I’ve been to Italy and France, but never your neck of the woods I suppose.” I let out a laugh.
He takes a sip of his drink, neither of us have made an effort to move back to the group since receiving them. I can see my friend giving two thumbs up over Harry’s shoulder. I’m sure this was some plan of hers to try and get us to hit it off.
“Well, you tell me when you’re free and we’ll go.” He smiles, “I’ll be your tour guide.”
God, I would love to take him up on that offer.
“Aren’t you going to be awfully busy with your first solo tour?”
“Ahh, you keep up with me then?” He smirks, I’m sure he’s enjoying that little ego boost.
“Pretty hard not to.” I roll my eyes, as if the pop star was so under the radar. “I can hardly leave my apartment in New York without coming across a billboard with your face plastered on it.”
“Well I’m sorry about that, love.”
“Don’t be, it’s a nice face to look at.”
It’s my turn now to smirk and notice Harry slightly thrown off.
“Tour doesn’t start for a month, pick a date before that and we’ll go.”
“You’re putting an awful lot of faith into someone you just met a half an hour ago.”
“I have faith in you, Y/n.”
“And why should I have faith in you?” I tease, “For all I know you could be a very creepy man.”
“Hey!” He laughs, “Haven’t you ever heard of treating people with kindness?”
The first time Harry and I ever met. That first night even, I knew that he was going to mean so much. I was proven correct a few weeks later when we actually did go to London together.
“Home sweet home.”
Harry opens the door wide enough so both of us and our luggage can fit. He’s invited me to stay at his flat, claiming it’s nicer than any hotel anyway. It’s also an obvious excuse for us to spend more time together just the two of us.
“It’s awfully gloomy here, strike one for London.” I joke.
“Hey! It’s late, you can’t judge it yet! Plus we just got off of a ten hour flight, you’re not in the right headspace.”
“Yeah, yeah.” I roll my eyes.
Harry and I have managed to grow so close in the short amount of time we’ve known each other. We met up several more times to somewhat plan the trip, Harry helped me pack claiming he would know what I would need better than I would.
We both laughed until we were crying, trying on the various clothes from my closet. Many random gems, things I’m almost positive Harry wants to steal.
We still haven’t defined what we are. Friends is the easiest way of putting it, but it doesn’t feel quite right. We flirt constantly and were touchy with each other, but we’ve never acted on anything.
“Alright, let’s find you a room.”
Harry takes my suitcase with him as he leads me into the rest of his house. We go up to the second floor and he opens the door to a large room. It’s decorated in simple white with hints of yellow.
“Cute.” I grin looking around the room.
“Y’like it?” He almost seems nervous. Giddy like an unsure child.
“It’s perfect, thank you.”
For the first time there’s an awkward pause. Just a few seconds of what to do, it’s really late and by the sounds of it we have plans for an early morning.
“Well, I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Goodnight, H.”
Harry leaves me to my room and goes to his own, which is conveniently across the hall.  
He wasn’t lying, the next day we are up bright and early. Too early, I might add.
“Y/n.” He taunts my name on the other side of the door.
“Too early.” I grumble, my face still half smashed into a pillow. I don’t even flinch hearing the door open.
“C’mon, Y/n. If you get up now we can go out for breakfast and go to the farmers market.” I feel the bed dip as he settles on the bed.
“Why can’t I sleep in and we just eat here?” I finally turn to face where’s he’s sitting on the edge of the bed, he has an amused look on his face.
“Because I’ve been in Los Angeles for the past two months. There’s quite literally no food here.”
I let out a groan and drop my head back down.
“I’m amazed with how cute you still look while so angry and having just woken up.”
“You’re such a kiss ass.” I grumble.
“Only for you.” He lightly smacks my ass before walking back out. “Let’s go, Y/Ln.”
I get up and look out the large window to see that it’s raining, but it looks like the sun is trying to come out. I settle on a comfortable outfit, tucking my hair back into a low bun. I wash my face and throw on a pair of sunnies.
“Ready?”
I nod and we take off. We walk to a diner that Harry loves going too, he claims that he gets cravings for it when he’s back in the states. I have to say, after eating there, I understand his hype.
Once were no longer hungry, we take off for the farmer’s market.
It’s cute to say the least. We pick up some organic veggies to cook with for dinner and we find some cheese and fresh bread.
“H, look!” I cross over from the tent we had been in to the one across the street.
“They’re beautiful!” I trail my fingers across all of the different bundles of flowers.
“I almost lost you.” Harry says after catching up.
“Look at how pretty they are!” I pick up a bundle of sunflowers.
“How much?” Harry asks before handing over more than enough for them.
“Gotcha!” Harry smiles looking down at his phone. I’m sure he’s taken yet another candid picture.
“For someone who doesn’t post on social media, you take an awful lot of pictures.” I bump his shoulder as we continue walking.
“Yeah, still like to have the memories.”
Harry and I spent two more days in London exploring more of the city before we decided to take a road trip to Holmes Chapel to see where Harry grew up. It was a long drive, but it was worth it to see Harry light up.
“That’s the bakery I used to work in.” He points out the car window.
“Don’t you want to stop?” I ask, watching him drive right by it.
“No, it’s kind of become a fan beacon now.” Harry explains.
We continue to drive through the town as he points out more spots from when he grew up. Or we sit in a comfortable silence just looking out at the scenery. I don’t notice we’ve arrived somewhere until Harry puts the car in park.
“Where are we?” I ask, looking at the house in front of us. It’s grown dark out, but the house looks warm and inviting.
“My mum’s house.” He quickly gets out of the car before I can ask a question.
“Harry!” I roll my eyes, following him to the door.
“What?” He grins looking over his shoulder. He knocks and it doesn’t take long for an answer to follow.
“Harry!” She pulls him in for a hug, the woman I can only assume is his mother.
They talk softly to each other and I feel as if I’m invading a very private moment.
“You’ve brought someone home?” She shouts with an excited voice. Without a pause, she pulls me in for an equally tight hug. She knocks the air out of my lungs, but I let out a laugh.
“In all these years, Harry’s never brought a girl home!”
“Mum!” Harry groans, a pink color taking over.
“Come in come in! I’m just finishing up supper.”
She disappears further into the house, once Harry and I step in, I can feel the warmth of the home and smell whatever she’s cooking.
“You brought me home to meet your mom!” I tease, turning to smack Harry lightly on the chest.
“No, she would just be upset if I was here and didn’t see here before leaving for a world tour.”
Bullshit.
“Harry, you’ve never brought a girl home before.” I smirk.
“Alright alright, I really like you. As if it wasn’t obvious enough before.” Harry admits, he successfully knocks the smile clear off my face.
“Are you going to say anything?” He asks, suddenly twisting the right on his fingers around out of nerves.
“I like you too.” I smile, “Duh.”
“Thank god.” He sighs, pulling me in for a hug.
“Alright, supper is- oh! You’re having a moment, I’ll go.” Anne rushes back to the kitchen. It would take a blind man to miss the smile and happy dance at seeing us like this.  
“She’s a sweetheart.” I pull back so I can look up
“Yeah, we’re a pretty charming family.”
“I can see that.”
After that it was bliss, Harry and I finally got together. Just in time for him to leave on tour. But we made it work, thankfully. Either I would fly out to whatever city he was in, or when he had extended breaks he would come see me on set. Any time we weren’t performing, we were facetiming. Or when the time differences didn’t work, we would leave each other long voicemails, just longing to hear the other’s voice.
By the time he finished his tour, and I finished my movie, we finally got to date like a normal couple and see each other regularly.
“Coming, coming!” I yell, rushing to my door to see who’s in a huge rush that causes them to knock repeatedly.
“I said-” Before I get a chance to yell when I swing the door open my jaw drops at the sight.  
“Hi, love.” He grins, a bundle of sunflowers in his hands.
“What are you doing here?” I peck his lips with mine and pull him in for a long hug, “You had things to finish up! I wasn’t supposed to get you home for another week!”
“I’m sorry, love, but I lied. I always knew I could sneak away.”
“That’s kind of evil.” I laugh pulling away, but still holding onto him.
“Which is why I have these.” He hands my the flowers.
“Thank you.” I grin, he follows me into my kitchen and watches as I put them in water.
“So, how does it feel to be all finished?” I ask.
“Good, it was really rewarding, but really exhausting. I’ve just been waiting to come home to you to be perfectly honest.”
“Well, here I am.” I smile, I take a seat on his lap. It’s good to have him here.
Beachwood Cafe. The coffee here doesn’t taste as good when it’s not filled with our laughter and deep conversations. It seems bitter without the games.This was our spot in Los Angeles. Early in our relationship we had stumbled upon the place and it became ours. The baristas growing accustomed to our orders and our stardom.
“You’re absolutely mad if you think that’s a word.” Harry says, his voice getting louder and gaining the attention of people around us. As if we weren’t already doing that. The cafe is always busy, but today it seemed like there were lots of people here.
“Have you ever played Scrabble? Of course this is a word!” I argue. Part of why we like the cafe is the bookshelf filled with board games. Every time we come Harry and I pick a new one we’ve never played together before. Today we settled on Scrabble even though it led to us bickering.
“I don’t like playing with a cheater.” He can’t even get away with it without smiling, but we continue the teasing fight for the fun of it. Banter is always entertaining.
“A cheater?” My voice raising as well, “Look it up!”
We both breakout in laughter over how stupid it is to be arguing about.
Still blissfully aware in our honeymoon phase which lasted way longer than any other relationship either of us have been in. If only I had known then how much worse the arguing would get.
“Harry, what’s happened to you?” I ask, tears freely falling to the floor. The tears being caused more by anger than hurt at this point.
“What do you mean?” His words slurred.
“You’re drunk again, of course.” I roll my eyes, leaving him on the bathroom floor to deal with himself.
“You’ve made a fool of me Harry!” I shout, letting my temper get the best of me, “Do you know how embarrassing you were tonight? Tonight was a big deal for me, I’ve never been the lead actress. You now what this premiere meant to me.”
“Love, I-” Harry follows me out of the bathroom into our bedroom. My attitude and hurt seems to have sobered him up a bit, though he is still far from dry.
“You got hammered before the movie could even start!” I huff, “You were loud and obnoxiously shouting about nonsense! Not to mention the fact that you flirted with nearly every person at the bar.”
“Y/n, it’s fine we-”
“No, it’s far from fine. I don’t know what’s gotten into you lately, since when have you felt most comfortable with a drink in your hand? Or a stranger on your arm? This isn’t new for you anymore, you’ve been acting like this for months.”
The silence coming from him proves I’m right.
“If it’s been months, why haven’t you said anything before now. We’ve been dating for nearly two years now, we live together. I would think you’re comfortable enough to tell me you think I’m a drunk.” Harry sasses back.
“I’ve tried! You just get rude or you don’t even remember it in the morning.” I push my hair back out of my face, “The only difference it, tonight was my breaking point.”
I walk to my closet and grab a bag and start shoving essentials in it.
“No, Y/n, wait.” Harry follows me, he takes the bag from my hand and starts pulling things back out.
“Harry stop!” My voice rising louder than it ever has in this house, “Enough. I’m done. We are finished.”
Harry suddenly drops the bag and stumbles back out of the closet. I manage to repack the bad come out to see Harry sitting on the edge of the bed, staring blankly at his shoes.
“I’ll send someone to get the rest of my stuff. You can buy out my half of the lease.”
After that night, I never looked back.
The song ends and I turn off my phone and set it down. I wipe away any remnants at eyes, the tears long dried. Before I can spend any more time thinking about him or the way things used to be, I get dressed for the day. Harry was right about one thing.
I’ll never need him again.
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datawyrms · 4 years
Text
Ectoplasmic Bonds
Dannymay2020 Day 30: Family
“AHA! I have found you, ghost child. You are no match for my peerless intellect!”
This was weird. Not the ranting and dramatic posing in midair, that was just Technus being the weird little boaster he was. The fact he was boasting at a park with no gadgets in sight was the confusing bit. He’d expected the Box ghost or some random animal when his ghost sense rudely interrupted his Saturday, not the tech crazed monologuer. 
“I didn’t know we were playing hide and seek!” His hands glowed green, ready to blast the second his foe made a move. “I know a great place you can hide though!”
“Playing? No, we are not playing hide and seek!” the ghost crossed his arms, almost looking insulted. “We are playing BASIC HEALTH EDUCATION, for your feeble mind is clearly LACKING THIS DATA”
“Uh. What.” Danny blinked, eyebrow raising in bafflement. Blasting the ghost would probably be best, but he hadn’t even taken advantage of his blank stare.
Technus shook his head and tisked at him. “Your cousin let us know about your RECKLESS BEHAVIOUR, ghost child! It is a wonder that you haven’t collapsed!”
“My cou-Dani? Wait why would Dani be buddies with you?” the green glow snuffed out, brain struggling to figure out what was going on. Was it April first? Was this a really complicated distraction plot?
The green skinned ghost tisked again. “By being as reckless as you! Young and thinking you are invincible!”
Well that answered approximately nothing at all. Yet the ghost did seem to be serious, he was getting the distinct impression Technus was scolding him. For something. Maybe he was just having a weird dream. “I still have no idea what you’re babbling about.”
“Your education is LACKLUSTER, child! How can you not know you are starving yourself? You are more a ghost baby than a ghost child!”
“Well excuse me for not getting the ‘ghosts for dummies’ book!” he snapped back, wondering if he should go after the ghost for that baby comment.
“Ah, ah, I am not fighting a half starved toothpick! You put those fists down, child and listen to your elders!”
He was totally scolding him, what the heck. “Ghosts don’t eat, what are you even on about?”
Technus put his face in his hands. “The youth of today! So uneducated!” Yet when he looked back up he just seemed more determined. “Fear is all well and good child, but it is no replacement for ectoplasm! The state of your cousin was appalling!” He seemed to notice how Danny tensed at the mention of ‘cousin’ and continued. “She is FINE thanks to our cardboard enthusiast!”
“Well uh. Thanks for helping her out?”
“It was AVOIDABLE! If you were not so reckless in hanging around over here all the time! Do you WANT to start falling apart from lack of ectoplasm? It is distinctly UNGROOVY”
...Was he actually worried about the two half ghosts? Weird. “Errr no, I would not like to do that, thanks.” He had enough nightmares from just seeing it happen to the other clones.
“Then you must stop AVOIDING returning to the ghost zone! You have not come in over a month! Perhaps exhaustion is a thrill to you, but you take it to RIDICULOUS levels! The cousin was quite WORRIED for you, ghost child!”
Dani had managed to set Technus on him for...not going into the ghost zone. What. That was important? “I don’t think I have to-”
“YOU DO! Do you think ectoplasm will rain from the sky for you here? NUH UH. IT DOES NOT.” He seemed larger,  looming over the teenager as he pointed at him. “You might have a big battery but it will still RUN OUT. Then no more RECKLESS ghost child!”
Why did he feel so embarrassed? Why was he even letting Technus of all people chew him out? “Okay, okay! I get it!”
“GOOD. Puddles are very BORING nemeses!” He glared at the jumpsuited teenager for a moment longer before vanishing, apparently planning to keep his word on a lack of fighting.
He really, really hoped all this was just a very dumb dream. People had definitely seen the encounter, it was pretty hard to overlook two ghosts yelling in a park in the middle of the day. Mom would probably call it proof that all his fights were staged, or something fun like that. Not that the truth of ‘he came to yell at me because I’m bad at being a ghost’ was much better.
Mom’s pondering at the table in the evening shot any hope square in the chest. “I suppose they do look similar, colour scheme wise. I’m not sure it’s any proof of a familial relation though, there’s no real reason for such relationships”
Jack nodded, scratching at his jaw before adding his thoughts. “Maybe new ghosts cling to older ones at first before separating off to do their own thing? Phantom’s got some electricity powers, doesn’t he?”
“He does, they do share the tendency to never stop talking as well, come to think of it.”
It was very difficult to not respond to that remark. He was not the kind of scenery chewer Technus was! This was going to be a looooong night.
“It’s just strange. They’ve never shown to have a friendly relationship before now. If they wanted to take the town for themselves it’d make more sense to let Phantom stay ill.”
“Even ghosts want to protect the young of their species?” Jack frowned “I didn’t think the spook was actually a young spirit though.”
“True. Technus might only call him a child because of his appearance. Yet it did look like a parent scolding a child, didn’t he complain about the youth?”
“Well if we can nab one of em, we can see if they share or have similar ectoplasmic signatures! It could be an instinctive thing if they’re ‘related’ that way.”
Danny worked to suppress a groan, rubbing at his forehead. Great. Now they thought Technus was his ghost dad. All his dated references were going to be way worse now! He so wasn’t like him! The second his friends found out it was going to be their new favourite joke.
-
He never did manage to figure out how to track Dani down, instead getting surprised by her with a tackling hello.
“Does this count as a ghost attack?” he asked, smirking as the the ghost snickered at the question.
“I dono, does it? You aren’t fleeing in terror.”
“Maybe I’m just an out of towner that doesn’t believe in ghosts“
Dani shrugged before landing, taking a few glances around before shifting back to her human form. “Then I guess I’m a ghost that doesn’t believe in ghosts either.”
“New outfit?”
“Yup! And it’s all mine,” her grin was infectious as she grabbed the edge of the thick purple hoodie, fiddling with the dark lining that seemed to have a scattering of stars. “I don’t even feel cold in the zone with this on.”
“You know you don’t have to live in the ghost zone, right? Jazz can probably make up some forgotten branch of the family you’re from, or something.”
“What, and join you in tip toeing around ghost hunters that love and hate you at the same time? No way cuz. If I wanted that, I’d be with Vlad.” she paused with a frown. “Well okay, it was fake love but you get it.”
“Too well.” he shrugged, trying to ignore the rush of irritation from his parents being compared to that absolute fruit loop. “What did you drop by for then? Seeing as you sent Technus after me last time. Which I’m still mad about.”
“Oh you know, catch up with Val, enjoy some sunlight. Nothing big.” she rolled her eyes “I didn’t send him after you! I just mentioned to Boxy how you don’t go to the ghost zone much and I guess he spread it around?”
“Well thanks to that people think Technus is my dad!”
“What, he’s not?” she burst out laughing from the other half ghost’s full body shudder, ducking the half hearted snowball thrown her way.
“Oh you think it’s funny now, just wait until they start saying it about you too.”
“Nope, still funny! Besides, I already got a ghost dad.”
“You what.” he stared, but she didn’t seem to be kidding. 
“Well after the whole Boxy making sure I didn’t drop dead from lack of ectoplasm thing a lot of ghosts kinda felt bad for me?” the dismissive wave of her hand seemed a bit forced. “Way easier to deal with over there than with humans. They knew I didn’t really have a place that was mine so they let me stick around for awhile.”
“I guess that was nice of them. You sure it isn’t some trick?”
“You worry too much cuz. You really think I wouldn’t have been super suspicious at first? Already did that once!” her glare made him blush, rubbing the back of his neck. Stupid question, of course she’d be careful after Vlad. “Being a clone with no papers is way easier in the ghost zone, so spending most of my time there just makes sense.”
“Yeah, I guess it is,” He couldn’t imagine wanting to live in that green chaotic world, but he actually had a decent amount going for him on this side. Dani...didn’t.
“So yeah, basically got adopted by Nocturn. He helped me figure out the design, it’s reversible.”
“Wait wait NOCTURN? The guy who tried to put everyone to sleep to take over the world? That one?!” he sputtered, only causing his clone to laugh again.
“Yeah? Everyone likes to try and see how powerful they can be sometimes, did you take it personally?”
“Yeah a little! People could have been hurt! And he dumped me on a random rock in the ghost zone! Then tried to kill me!”
“Everyone tries to kill you.”
“Like that makes it better?! He’s a nutcase!”
“Or maybe you’ve only actually met him once? Everyone wants to try messing with Amity Park at one point. It’s just a thing to try, since you never really seriously hurt anyone.”
“Now you make it sound like the ghost attacks are my fault.” he muttered, quickly realizing Dani didn’t care if he wasn’t exactly a fan of the dream ghost.
“Well they’d come anyway because the human world is cool. Some of them are totally only coming to try stealing the town from you though, sorry cuz.” she shrugged again “Oh! Noc’s pretty impressed by your ice attacks by the way, but he’s still pretty sure Frostbite could help with a few things.”
She nicknamed him! “Noted. Uh. Maybe tell him not to do the whole take over the world and kill me thing again?”
“He won’t. One, I consider you family. Two, watching and learning from dreams is more his thing. The take over the world bit was more of a ‘sure why not give it a go’.”
She seemed so relaxed, even while his mind was yelling that she couldn’t be safe around a ghost like that. Yet she was the one who mostly lived in the ghost zone. She probably would know a lot of his foes better than he actually did...though it still rankled. “Well I’m glad you found more family over there. But I’m not inviting him for lunches.”
“You’ll have to be the one to come visit sometime! You have no idea how scared some ghosts are of you, it’s hilarious. They don’t know you’re a total dork.” She perked up when he stopped crossing his arms.
“Hey, that just makes you dork squared ya know.”
“I don’t think that’s how it works.”
“Sure it does. Or not. I’d have to ask Tuck.” he managed to keep smiling, trying not to think too hard about why he’d be considered terrifying to ghosts.
“Or you could ask your daddy” her smirk was vicious as he let out an offended squawk, flinging another snowball after her.
“Don’t even joke about that!”
“Tooooo late! Bye cuz!” her laugh was warm and carefree as she fled from her flustered cousin, vanishing as she darted behind a large bush.
Probably off to go find Valerie now then before headed back home. Still, it was good to know she had a home to go to now. Even if it was with some ghosts he usually had to beat up. Family reunions would be a whole lot messier if she kept that up. Though really, she deserved any kindness she got.
He still wasn’t going to forgive her for the Technus thing though. He was going to need to brush up on dream and sleep puns for proper retaliation. 
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minalous · 5 years
Text
demon’s love pt1 ● jjk
Tumblr media
pairing: jungkook x reader
description: demon!au, Jungkook CEO
genre: romance | angst | smut
word count: 2k
prologue ~ part 1 | part 2 | part 3
-
Loneliness. One of the worst feelings you have ever felt or that is what you thought until the day your mother decided to abandon you. An empty house, no familiar items around to be seen, a dead silence was what you came across the very day you won the first violin - being the orchestra master was a dream to come true. The unfortunate you would celebrate a victory alone, a victory which was not yours to begin with.
How many days have gone past with you crying over nothing, even the smallest of detail that reminded you of your mother would be a reason for you to burst into tears. You were terrified of your emotions but most of all it was the need you felt to get someone’s attention. That feeling kept haunting you for months, a few days would get past with the thought it may have been an illusion - no need to be the centre of somebody’s life, a man’s hidden treasure.
Not a single day was boring in your life for the last couple of years. You were now older and wiser, or so you thought to yourself. Today was a rainy day, people being the cruel selfish animals they were, they pushed you around like a play thing, the rain soaking into your clothes, your bones feeling as if they would turn into ice in any minute.
A small chuckle escaped your lips as the rain took you back to a trip down the memory lane, revisiting memories of the days your mother will rush you to the violin classes you had. To learn the violin was not your wish to begin with. Your wish as a kid was to play with your friends, go to the park and get to play with the other kids around your neighbourhood.
The place you lived with your mother was not the epitome of a rich neighbourhood, houses rushed to be made and small as they could get. You never complained about the conditions you were living in, you were just a kid. The older you were getting, the better you could understand the reasons behind why you continued living in the same house even though you mother was working so hard to provide for you.
The violin classes were getting a little too expensive but your mother’s wish was for you to succeed. She wanted you to get a private tutor, one of the continent’s best first violins, unreasonable but she made it happen. You were old enough to figure out the new source of income she has succeed to find - lonely, unhappy men who were willing to pay a more than beautiful woman to keep them warm at night.
To be honest, you were never appalled from your mother’s actions. When your father left you and your mother, she swore in her life to do anything in her power to keep you happy and safe. As long as she did not regret the limits she exceeded for your sake, you would accept it and never speak a word about it. She was the one to give you wings, to help you achieve better things in your life.
Boring days. Long, stretched days. You never understood or were able to find out why it was so complicated to find anything to make your heart tremble from excitement, desire, passion.
The town you were living in never gave you the chance to explore your talents any further nor was there any point to unravel the possibilities of you to become anything more than a mere common human.
The feeling of you to leave, the slow burning flame inside you to leave everyone and everything behind was getting bigger and bigger by the day, the years you spend here were more than you could bear especially since the day you felt you were over your mother’s loss.
The money you had left would barely  help you get the tickets you needed for your trip, money for a new house would be out of the question and anything essential you needed for a life changing event like this would not be affordable.
There was a possibility you could postpone your trip for a few more months until the needed amount of money was found.
Only solution was to find a temporary job, something that could give you time to figure out what to do with your life but also with the money you needed.
The future ahead of you was getting you all excited, finding a job was nothing more but only an essential stop before your new beginning. The hot cup of coffee next to the newspaper was waiting for you impatiently, all sort of jobs to be offered were written in small letters and you were reading them one by one.
“I am not a professional footballer or a singer. What is wrong with people and their requests?” Your voice echoed inside your small apartment while you stormed off to your kitchen.
The first thing you did was to grab a bottle of water from your fridge, the need to cool off from the summer’s heat was enormous indeed. How had it gotten so hard to find even the smallest of job without being needed to be an expert on everything?
You stare into nothingness, eyes fixed on your balcony, now sitting for hours on your cuddle chair without moving a muscle. Deep down you knew you could make it work.. only if you knew how.
Mind spinning around on how to find a decent job, a job that could pay off the rent, the utility bills and could possibly help you with the money for your trip.
The thought that you belonged somewhere else and you knew it was stuck in your head, you could feel it in your heart that there was a place in the world where you would suffer no more, a great new start awaiting for you.
Like a lion in a cage, the small town you once called home was making you feel there was no air to breath, as if you were continuously climbing a mountain and the air was getting thinner and thinner.
Once you got off of your cuddle chair the balcony was your first choice to storm out. The feeling of fresh air  made you come to your senses, realising the beauty of the night was breathtaking. Tonight the moon was in full bloom making everything and anything around it seemingly more than bearable.
You could remember, not long ago, your mom used to tell you an old myth for the moon in full bloom.
Every now and then the moon would listen to people and their requests, mocking them for the silly and petty dreams they had.
But there was she, a young girl with silk white hair and white eyes who would sing lullabies to the moon, begging for him to kill her and grant her mercy.
The moon had no mercy for people but this young girl had no fear for death. He did not wish to see her suffer so he asked her if she wished to spend her life as an immortal, to be one with him.
The young girl gladly accepted his offer and so the moon made her his bride. The myth continued with rumours that the bride would bed the moon to grant wishes to all the girls who were desperate to change lives.
Everyone who answered to the moon and his bride would grant wishes to the ones in need. Would they be kind enough to be truthful to the wishes? No-one ever knew..
So with eyes full of hope you looked up to the full moon and with a whisper you told him your deepest secret.
“I would sell my soul to get out of here.”
How little did you know that your prayers would be heard.
A man across the world heard your whisper as if your voice was loud and clear. It only took him a moment to come to you but it took him a thousand years to find the one to fulfil a wish for.
“I heard you, luv. I shall not have you wait for me, shall I?”
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glorious-spoon · 5 years
Text
The Bird and the Fish
Written for days 19 & 20 of Tentacletober: Protective Tentacles and Established Tentacle Relationship. Follows Beached and Overboard.
Rated T; Malec & Clizzy, no archive warnings apply. Other than the fact that it’s an excessively serious take on tentacle monster crack, as per usual :P
In which Izzy starts to become suspicious. 
Read on AO3
*
Izzy has been sleeping on the couch at Alec and Jace’s off-campus apartment for all of a week when she finally gives up on waiting for one of them to tell her what’s going on and corners Jace while he’s putting away groceries. Or at least, what passes for groceries for the two of them; all she knows is that there’s a frankly excessive amount of protein powder and cheap beer.
“So,” she says significantly, leaning against the fridge and folding her arms. Jace jumps slightly, then gives her a quick, nervous look that couldn’t be more suspicious if he was holding up a sign reading SHADY BULLSHIT AHEAD. That’s why she started with him, really. Alec is almost as stubborn as she is; Jace will fold like wet paper if you know where to push. Which she does. “Did you guys join a cult, or what?”
Jace blinks at her. “No.”
“Because you’ve both been really evasive since I got here.”
“We haven’t been evasive,” Jace says, evasively.
“Does this have anything to do with the Herondale?” She doesn’t even know the whole story there, other than the fact that about a dozen people ended up getting arrested, including Alec’s boss, and Alec spent three days in the hospital and was distinctly squirrely about the exact details of his near-drowning afterward. “You guys never really told me what happened.”
“Alec caught Aldertree’s smuggling ring, Aldertree had him thrown him overboard like the murdering fuckface that he is,” Jace says, and the anger in his voice, at least, is definitely real. Izzy can relate.
“And then he… what, swam to shore? With a broken ankle?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Oh, come on,” Izzy starts, but before she can pursue that line of questioning, the front door swings open to admit Alec himself, tousle-headed, sunburnt, and wearing wet swim trunks, dripping a trail of water across the worn linoleum floor as he kicks his sandals off and wanders toward the kitchen.
“Oh, thank god,” Jace says. “Here. Torment Alec instead of me, I need to go get ready for work.”
“Why are we tormenting Jace?” Alec asks. He smells like salt water and sweat when he leans past Izzy to grab a Powerade out of the fridge.
Izzy wrinkles her nose and ducks out from under his arm. “I’m not tormenting him, I was just asking about what happened with your shady boss—”
“Ex-boss.”
“Yeah, near-drowning is one hell of a pink slip,” Izzy says dryly, and pokes his chest where there’s an unmistakable double-row of reddish-purple hickeys showing up under the sunburn. “Nice body art, by the way. Did he have suckers?”
Alec turns bright red, which isn’t unexpected; Jace makes an appalled noise, which actually kind of is, and groans, “Jesus Christ, Alec, you weren’t seriously—”
“I’m gonna go shower,” Alec says quickly, and slips out of the kitchen like he’s been greased, hickeys and all.
“I have to get ready for work, asshole,” Jace yells after him as the bathroom door slams shut. He glances back at Izzy, mumbles, “So I’m gonna just—” then hooks his thumb over his shoulder and flees, leaving Izzy blinking and baffled in the kitchen.
*
Asking Alec about it goes about as well as interrogating a brick wall, which is more or less what she expected. Izzy has the good sense to stop before he actually storms off and they manage to pass a fairly pleasant evening bickering over terrible reality TV before Jace gets home just past midnight and yells at them both to go to bed.
That doesn’t mean that Izzy has forgotten about it, though.
The thing is, Alec and Jace have always kind of been a self-contained unit. They fight almost as much as they get along, but it’s still always been Alec-and-Jace, with little Izzy trailing along behind them. Never quite in on the jokes, never quite able to keep up.
She’s twenty years old now, with a college degree behind her and med school ahead; it shouldn’t still sting like this. Maybe it’s just that she’s lonely after things ended with Meliorn, maybe it’s that this will probably be the last summer the three of them get to spend together, but it all just feels like the end of an era. Also, there’s clearly a good chunk of the story that she hasn’t gotten, and Izzy is determined not to be left in the dark. Not this time.
Anyway, it passes the time. And it’s better than spending her summer sleeping in her childhood bed while Max is away at camp and her mom is up to her ears in her expanding business and all of her high school friends are off to bigger and better things. At least this way she can get out, swim in the ocean, harass her brothers and flirt with the cute redheaded girl who does cartoon sketches on the boardwalk for five bucks a pop.
She does one of Izzy, late one night after the shops have all closed down and mayflies are circling the tall lights, and it’s not one of the goofy cartoons she sells to the tourists but Izzy’s face sketched out in graceful confident lines, dark eyes and a soft expression that Izzy definitely doesn’t remember wearing, and the girl—Clary, her name is Clary—pushes it into her hands and refuses to take any payment and practically flees before Izzy can do anything else, like, say, ask her out to dinner.
She wanders home with the sketch clutched in her hand, feeling light and warm and unusually content with the world, not even thinking about Jace and Alec and whatever mysterious bullshit they’re definitely lying to her about.
So of course that’s when she crosses through the dunes on a shortcut back to the apartment and sees a tall familiar shadow slipping down toward the water.
It’s Alec. He’s in swim trunks again, barefoot and shirtless even though it’s starting to get cool at night as summer draws to a close. He has something in his hand but she can’t tell what it is. At the water’s edge, he kneels, silvery waves licking up over his feet and legs, reflecting the moonlight, and sets whatever it was he was carrying in the water. He sits back for a minute, then stands again and starts to wade out. A few yards out he must hit the drop off, because his head dips below the water for a moment before surfacing again, silhouette swaying rhythmically against the moonlit sky in a way that means he’s treading water. Izzy drifts closer without even meaning to.
A shadow moves beneath the waves, and then a man surfaces a few feet from Alec, all of a sudden, like he just emerged from the sea. A gleaming grin on his face reflects the moonlight, and from this distance, over the sound of the waves breaking on the shore, she can’t hear what they’re saying, but Alec’s voice is soft and low enough that she’s not surprised when he moves closer, leaning in to kiss the man with a comfortable sort of familiarity.
Just a late-night hookup, then. Izzy makes a face and starts to turn away before she can inadvertently witness any more of it, then pauses. Something is rippling, breaking the surface of the water. Several dark appendages that are definitely not arms twine up over Alec’s shoulders and into his hair, and instead of trying to escape he—turns, and presses a quick smiling kiss to one of them.
“What,” Izzy says out loud, “the fuck.”
It comes out louder and shriller than she intends, splitting the fragile silence. Alec jerks, spins toward her, but the other man—he shoves Alec back with effortless force, spinning so that he’s between Izzy and Alec with the vast moonlit ocean spread out behind them. More of those things (tentacles, she thinks, slightly hysterical, those are tentacles, what the fuck) slip out of the water, making what would actually be a pretty menacing display if Alec wasn’t shoving at them exasperatedly, slipping under one of the tentacles and pushing it out of the way with a careless hand.
“Stop that, it’s just my sister,” he says, and then, “Izzy, what the hell are you doing here?”
“What am I doing? What are you doing? Who is that?” She almost says What is that, because the—man, or whatever he is, is staring at her from the water, his eyes an inhuman shade of yellow, reflecting the moonlight. There are long slits on the sides of his throat that ripple faintly as she watches. Gills.
And there are the tentacles. Several of them are still wrapped around Alec, who doesn’t seem bothered by it. He glances at his companion, then back at Izzy, then sighs.
“This is not how I was planning on telling you about all this, for the record,” he says wearily. “Izzy, Magnus Bane. Magnus, my sister, Isabelle.”
“The nosy one,” Magnus Bane says. There’s an odd lilt to his voice, not quite an accent; it’s more as if it’s reflecting against itself, a resonance that makes Izzy think of walesong, echoes in the deep. His smile gleams; his teeth are sharp. “I remember.”
“I’m not,” she starts, then snaps her mouth shut, flushing. The drawing that Clary gave her is starting to crumple in her fist, and she forces herself to relax before she can ruin it.
“That’s not how I put it,” Alec says, glancing at Izzy. “Curious. I said curious. Be nice.”
Magnus Bane surveys her for another moment, then sighs, relaxing. The tentacles coiled around Alec loosen. “All right. I’m sorry.” It’s half to her, half to Alec. “I haven’t had especially good luck with shore-dwellers lately. Present company excluded, of course.”
“Thanks,” Alec says dryly. “Neither have I, honestly.”
That near-drowning thing, Izzy realizes suddenly. Out loud, she says, “I was wondering how you survived that.”
“Yeah.” Alec glances at Magnus, who is watching him with a softness that makes her want to like him, suddenly. Even if he does seem like the exact kind of asshole that Alec would fall for, only in the shape of some quasi-mythical being. Or because of that, maybe. “I had a little help.”
“Oh,” Izzy says. She looks at Magnus, who is looking back at her, and the thing is—
The thing is, there are tentacles coiled around Alec’s shoulders and arms and Magnus has one hand out of the water and is resting it on Alec’s elbow, webbed fingers splayed. There is, absurdly, what looks like sparkly polish on his nails. This whole thing is so patently ridiculously unbelievable that she’s half-convinced that she’s hallucinating it. But the expression on his face is something close to anxious.
“Thank you,” she tells him seriously, and his grin is sudden and sharp and makes him look warmer all of a sudden.
“Entirely selfish, my dear.” He turns back toward Alec. One of the tentacles brushes Alec’s wet hair out of his face, and it’s both incredibly weird and incredibly tender. “Perhaps you should… explain things.”
“I don’t want to stand you up if—”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Magnus tells him, and there’s an undercurrent there that Izzy can’t read. “Talk to your sister. I trust your judgement. I’ll let Cat and Ragnor know.”
He lifts his chin to press another familiar kiss to Alec’s mouth, then just—slips away into the water, leaving barely a ripple behind him. Alec stays where he is for a long moment before turning and starting back toward the shore. He lets the tide carry him in, then straightens up in the shallows and wades the rest of the way back. He flops onto the wet sand next to her. Izzy stares down at him, and he gives her a look and pats the sand next to him. She sits.
“You were following me,” he says.
“You’ve been lying to me,” she counters, although that’s probably not completely fair. Alec sighs like it is, though.
“Yeah, well, would you have believed me if I told you the truth?”
“That you’re dating the Loch Ness monster? No, probably not.”
“We’re not, it’s not—” Alec shoves a hand through his hair and grimaces. “It’s complicated.”
“Yeah, I bet,” Izzy says, more sincerely than she really means to. She’s thinking, suddenly of a scrap of near-forgotten lines from the drama club’s 10th grade production of ‘Fiddler on the Roof’: A bird may love a fish, but where would they build a home together?
She’s pretty sure Joseph Stein didn’t mean it quite this literally, but it still applies. Alec’s profile looks thoughtful in the moonlight when she glances over at him, and Izzy hesitates, then settles a hand on his shoulder. She thinks about trying to say something supportive, but she knows from long experience how Alec tends to react to sympathy.
“So,” she says instead. Alec glances down at her warily, and Izzy finds herself grinning, which only makes him look more wary. “Tentacles, huh? How’s that work?”
It gets the reaction she was hoping for. Alec makes a strangled sort of noise and drops his face into his hands. “I am not discussing that with you.”
“I’m just saying. You’re living the hentai dream.”
“I will drown you,” Alec mutters with no real ire, then scrubs his hands over his face and glances over at her. “You can’t tell anyone.”
“Yeah,” Izzy says. “Obviously.”
“I mean it. Nobody. Not Mom, not Max, not your girlfriend—”
“I don’t have a girlfriend.”
“Sure.” Alec raises his eyebrows and nods at the paper still clutched in her hand. Her own face, lovingly rendered. There’s a signature at the bottom corner: Clary Fairchild. The ‘i’s’ in ‘Fairchild’ are dotted with hearts.
There’s a phone number scribbled under it. She didn’t notice it before. Too distracted by Clary’s blushing face and rapid retreat, and then by Alec and his… whatever the hell all this is.
“Shut up.” She’s blushing. “Anyway, it’s not like anyone would believe me.”
“Doesn’t matter. Magnus and his people, what would happen to them if someone found out—” He breaks off, looking out toward the sea, toward wherever Magnus is. He doesn’t need to continue. Izzy isn’t stupid; she can read between the lines. She shivers a little, though it’s not that cold.
“Jace already knows.” It’s not a question.
Alec nods. “He was there with me, the first time we… met Magnus. It’s a long story.”
“Oh,” Izzy says. There’s not really anything else she can say. She moves closer to Alec, propping her shoulder against his and watching him spin the small metal thing that isn’t a phone around and around in his hand while the moon drifts higher in the sky and the waves wash in around them.
“You should call her,” Alec says eventually. “Your artist, I mean.”
Izzy looks up at him; from this angle his face is all but unreadable in the way that Alec often is, but it doesn’t take a genius to guess what he’s thinking. And even if it did, Izzy just so happens to be a genius.
“Yeah,” she says, and bumps his shoulder companionably. “Maybe I will.”
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killervibe · 5 years
Text
What’s Broken
Killervibe Week Day 5 - Flashpoint 
Notes: Written with @brainynia! This fic contains a panic attack and mentions of blood. 
Words: 7.7k
~.~ 
Barry exhaled slowly, readying himself for the day. The vacation was nice, perfect, even. A month spent together with his parents. Healthy, alive. Together. 
And as amazing as those weeks away were, he knew there was a limit to the amount of time he could spend dodging real life. It was time to be responsible, no longer hiding away with his mom and dad in Costa Rica. They were alive, and not going anywhere. 
 There’s no need to hold onto them so tightly. He’ll get the rest of his life to make up for lost time. 
 Barry walked into Jitters during his lunch break. The first half of the day had been busy, he spent most of it inspecting his office, to make sure nothing was out of place, and he spent what was left of it tackling the mountain of work he had left behind. His break couldn’t have come sooner. He stood in the back of the line of the coffee shop as he scanned the menu. Nothing seemed to change much, but there was a significant lack of custom drinks. Only three, ever like the specialty menu before. Kid Flash, the Kid Flash decaf and its frozen frap. 
 He wondered who Kid Flash was in this timeline. 
 The bell dinged, and Barry startled from his thoughts, approaching the cash register. The radio tinned in the background as he decided on his order. “Can I have a medium latte, no extra foam?”  
“Sure.” 
 Jitters was just as quick with their service as how Barry remembered. The barista called his name and his styrofoam cup slid across the counter. He picked it up and made his way back outside. Just as he was about to open the front door, a little girl in pigtails tripped. Her hot chocolate mug wobbled, her big green eyes widening with horror at the inevitable splash. 
 Barry looked left and right as Jitters slowed around him, using his speed for the first time in nearly six weeks. 
 He dashed for the mug, catching it with only a slosh of brown beverage dripping onto his hand. Quickly, he returned the mug back to the girl, grabbing her by the hook of her elbow. She slanted, the whites of her Converse shoes stressing against the floor as she regained her balance. 
 “Woah there,” he said. Barry helped her upright. “Careful. That could’ve burned.” 
 “Thanks!” she chirped. 
 “Barry? Barry Allen?” 
 Barry knew that voice. 
 He spun on his heel and his eyes lit up, not believing his luck. “Hey! Iris!” His grin was involuntary. There she was in full glory. Beautiful, sophisticated, poised Iris West, with a hand on her hip and a curious smile. 
 Of course he wondered about her when he was away. The kiss they shared on the porch, the possibilities he left behind. If things would change. What would change. There were risks involved, he knew that. But she was the one who told him to do what he needed. 
 And Barry needed this. 
 “Is that you?” 
 “Yeah. Long time no see.” 
 Barry wasn’t sure if he’d ever gone 6 weeks without contacting Iris since the coma. She had always been, and always will be, one of the most important people in his life.  
 “No kidding,” she laughed. “Oh my god.” Her eyes scanned up and down his body, and she licked her lips. 
 “You were quite the hero over there with that little girl.” 
 Barry scratched at the back of his neck, suddenly bashful. “You saw that?” 
 “Caught a glimpse of it through the window, yeah. You’ve always gone out of your way to help people, even when we were in high school.” 
 “Little acts of kindness,” he supplied. “My mom used to teach me that. It was her favourite lesson.” 
 Iris’s chin dropped in horror, she covered her mouth with a gasp. “ Was? Is she—” 
 Barry realized his mistake. He was so used to talking about his mom in the past tense.
 “No no no no no. She’s not! I mean not anymore. I mean. No. She never was. I was just away, and we had a lovely vacation. We just got back, actually!” He pulled out his phone to scroll through his pictures. “See!? Alive and well! And that’s my dad, he’s there too, we’re all a happy family.”
He was. Babbling. 
 Iris’ eyes glinted with amusement. “I think it’s sweet that you’re still close with your family.”
 “Yeah, like you and your dad! Your picture is still on his desk at work.” 
 Her brows furrowed in confusion. “...At work?” 
 “CCPD?” He blanched. Did Joe not work there anymore? Was he not a cop? That was an old memory. One from before. One that maybe no longer made sense. A nervous chill went down his spine.
 “I didn’t know you worked there.” 
 Barry stumbled at that. Something was telling him Iris really hadn’t seen him in a very long time. “—I. Yeah. CSI. I’ve been there for years.”
 She clicked her tongue. “Huh.”
 They talked for a few minutes more, what Iris had said about her not knowing he worked at CCPD playing over and over in his mind. He didn’t quite understand that.
 He knew that there could be some changes because of his actions, but being best friends with Iris—That shouldn’t have changed that drastically. They were inseparable as children before the tragedy. And even now, as they talked, he didn’t get the sense that Iris didn’t know him. She smiled easily and listened to what he had to say, even to the point Barry was quite sure she obviously likes him. 
 “So, Mister CSI, would you want to go out for coffee?” She glanced at his cup and flushed. “I know you already have one. But I was thinking we could get you a mug and make this a date?”
 Barry nearly died on the spot. “Here? I mean, now? No!”
 Iris’ eyebrows climbed sky high. 
 He clutched at her arm, stressing. “I mean yes . Yes of course I do. I’d love coffee. And to date. You. Us. Dating. Yes.”
 He begged his brain to reboot, mortified, but it was like all his brain cells were screaming Iris Iris Iris Iris Iris Iris! Date date date date date! at the top of their lungs. It wasn’t like he fantasized about this happening for just about his entire twenty-seven years of life.
 He sucked in a breath and tried to string together a proper sentence. “I’d love to reconnect, but I’m only on my lunch break.”
Iris laughed. “You, Barry Allen, are still very cute, you know that?” 
 He went beet red. “Yeah.”
 Did he just say yeah?
 “But you need to stop talking so fast.” 
 Barry shrugged. “Speed’s always been my problem.” 
 She unhooked his hand from her coat. “I understand how the CCPD shifts work. I can swing by after? We could do dinner.”
 “Sure! Yes! Dinner is great.”
 Iris glanced at the line, which had grown exponentially while they talked, and groaned. 
 He peered over his shoulder. “What were you getting?”
 She eyed him. “A latte.” 
 He thrusted his cup at her. “I just ordered that. You can have mine.”
 She blinked at it. Barry had to admit that was maybe a tad too much. But she surprised him, taking it. Their hands brushed.
 “Are you sure?” 
 He nodded. Iris sipped. “Mm. No foam.”
 Barry glanced at the time. “I have to head back now.” 
 “Wait. On second thought...Let me join you? I’ll go visit my dad.” She made a funny face. “I suddenly have some questions.” 
 Barry hoped he wasn’t about to cause a rift between Iris and Joe. 
 He hesitated, but she was looking up at him pleadingly. He was never able to resist that face.
“Uh—Sure.” 
 Barry went back to work without any coffee but lifted spirits. Iris made a beeline for Joe’s desk, but Barry took his time. He clapped his hands together as he walked through the lobby, spotting Captain Mendez. He was nothing like Singh and it was great. He could already tell he’d get a lot less flack for being late. Not that he had a legitimate reason to be, anymore. There was no more secret superheroing life he had to hide. No more commutes to Star Labs. 
 No. It wasn’t Star Labs anymore. His mind drifted to the ads everywhere. It had a new name. 
 “—What’s up, Barry?” 
 His thought dissolved. 
 “Hey!” He couldn’t keep the lingering excitement from his whole encounter with Iris out of his voice. 
 Captain Mendez gave him a once over. “I’ve never seen a man so excited on his first day back on the job,” he noted with a wry smile. 
 Barry grinned. “Well, it’s not about that.” He stammered, not wanting to sound ungrateful for his job. “Although I am so happy to be back here!”
 The Captain rolled his eyes fondly.
  Barry sighed, unable to keep it in anymore. “Captain Mendez, I was going to ask a girl out, but she beat me to it.” 
 “Ah, there’s no better feeling, is there? Well, until you hear the words ‘I do’.” 
 Barry reddened, imagining only for the gazillionth time, Iris in a white wedding dress. 
 “Yeah, we’ve got a ways to go before that, I think.” 
 They talked about the Rival. This new Speedster Barry soon came to realize was still plaguing the city since before he left the country. Kid Flash was struggling, and Barry sympathized for the city’s new speedster, but they were at his whim. He told Mendez so, much to the Captain’s irritation. 
 Everyone’s alerts beeped. 
 “It’s The Rival!” Barry heard Joe’s voice carry from down the hall. Captain Mendez excused himself to get the squad cars ready. 
 Barry saw Joe adjust his thigh holster. Iris sat next to officer Jonesy, questioning him. 
 “Joe! Let me know everything you can about The Rival so I can help ID him.” 
 Joe eyed Barry warily. “It’s Detective West to you, Allen. I ain’t Joe no more. Haven’t been since you were 17.” 
 That caught Barry completely off guard. “—Uh.” 
 “And you, our only expert CSI, think you can take a month long vacation to Costa Rica while The Rival is wreaking havoc downtown, and then just stroll up to me on the first day back making demands?” 
 Barry backpedalled. “No—I just thought, you know. That we were friends. Because we work together.” 
 Joe stopped adjusting his holster to glare. “Son, I’ve never been able to prove that there’s nothing wrong with you. But there’s gotta be something wrong with you.” 
 “Dad!” Iris gasped from the other desk, appalled. “Stop holding such a grudge. It was a long time ago.” 
 ...What was a long time ago? 
 Joe rolled his eyes, and waved at the other officers. “We’ve got to go.” 
 “Reports inform that Kid Flash is already at the scene.” 
 Iris jumped up from the desk. “ I have to go!” 
 Barry spun around as nearly everyone in the precinct got on their feet, leaving him behind. 
 He lifted up his finger, cocking his head to the side. “Huh.” Weird.
 The television set continued to blare, showing live footage of Kid Flash grappling with The Rival down The Boulevard. The yellow suit was striking, bright and easy to attract attention. 
 “Kid,” Barry muttered. “I sure hope you know what you’re doing.” 
 He saw a blur of yellow slam into a car by chokehold on the news. Barry gulped, looking down at his vibrating hands, already itching to help them. He shook his head at himself. 
 He always had to be the hero, didn’t he?
 Barry ran to the Werther Building just in time to see the speedster fall out of a window. He panicked when he saw him hurtling towards the ground. It would be a ten foot drop, and there wasn’t any signs of the guy slowing down. Barry spun his arms in a circular motion, creating a strong current to slow him down. He grinned at it started to work, Kid Flash no longer plummeting dangerously. 
 Now, only to swiftly turn the angle, so the fall won’t break—
 —Break what? 
 Barry blinked, clutching at his head. What was he supposed to be doing?
 He heard a scream, and it all came back to him, his heart leapt in his chest at the sight of Kid Flash crashing into the dumpsters. Barry was supposed to have softened his fall. What the hell was he doing? 
 Kid Flash laid in the garbage, passed out, but still breathing. 
 Barry approached him hesitantly, his curiosity getting the best of him. He peeled back the mask covering over Kid Flash’s eyes, the impulse too strong to resist. 
 Wally. 
 Kid Flash was... Wally?
 Iris’ brother groaned and squinted at the harsh sun, and the figure looming over him in it. 
  “Who are you?” 
  ~.~ 
 After some reluctant convincing, Barry managed to convince Wally to bring him to his Kid Flash hideout. It turned out to be his apartment. 
 Barry looked around, taking it all in. This was nothing like Star Labs, this was just a young man’s home. They passed by mementos and trinkets of Wally’s past with cars as he explained how he got his powers. It sounded so awfully familiar, except, it happened while Wally was speeding, and his car got struck by lightning, and also ended up in a coma.  Barry mused silently over that, Wally always did have an attachment to thrill. He thought back to Joe this afternoon. He wondered how he took to that, to Wally being gone for so long so soon after he knew him, only to become a superhero. 
 Barry frowned. Or, maybe he’d raised Wally his whole life here. He wasn’t sure. And it wasn’t his place to ask. 
 “...Anyways, that’s how I became The Flash.” 
 Barry coughed. “Kid Flash.” 
 Wally rolled his eyes, annoyed. “Don’t call me that.” 
 “I call you that,” a new voice called in, with the jingling sound of keys as the front door closed. 
 Barry swallowed down his surprise. “Iris.” 
 She gave him a confused smile. “...Barry?” 
 Wally turned to his sister. “You know him?” 
 “Of course I know him,” Iris said with a fond eye roll, giving Barry a secret look, as if she were expecting him to join in. 
 “Barry, this is my brother. Wally.” 
 Oh. Oh. Barry wasn’t supposed to know he knew Wally. Okay, so that must mean Wally still did live with Francine until recently, and explained why Wally didn’t recognize him. 
 Barry wanted to face palm. Oh Wally. He just invited a stranger into his home. 
 Barry tried to keep a list of new important changes in his head as the two siblings talked. It was starting to get confusing. Barry tried to deflect the attention off himself by asking about Iris’ involvement with Kid Flash instead. 
 “We became a brother-sister fighting unit.”
 Barry hid his smile. “Cool.” 
 “Except, the Rival is not cool!” Wally groaned, reaching into his freezer for a bag of peas to ice his bruises. 
 “Yeah, he needs to be stopped,” Barry agreed. 
 Iris sighed, sitting down on the couch. “Not for lack of trying. That’s a lot easier said than done. We’re open to suggestions.”
 Barry let out a long breath. He didn’t want to be pulled into The Flash business anymore, but he couldn’t let them struggle like this. They didn’t know it yet, but they were his family. And he’d always do whatever it takes to help Iris. 
 Barry carded his hand through his hair. “I think I can help.” 
 But Iris pursed her lips, unconvinced, before Barry could properly explain. “There’s only one man who can help us now. Cisco Ramon.” 
 Barry’s eyes widened. Cisco. 
~.~ 
 For a building he had only ever known as painstakingly empty, seeing Star Labs bustling with energy, crowds and loud corporate chatter brought Barry a stronger whiplash than ever previously experienced due to his own speed. 
 Iris and Wally sneaked Barry though the guest entrance and past the receptionist desk of Ramon Industries, and he didn’t have enough time to ask why that was until loud elevator doors dinged open, and every very fancily dressed person in the room stopped to stare. 
 It was Cisco Ramon who walked out confidently in an expensive suit and glasses, looking at his watch as a petite young girl walked briskly after him. “Is there anything better than coming home after a noisy helicopter ride?” he joked to his staff, who chuckled along with him. “New York was a success, people! Ramon Industries is Tokyo bound!” 
 The room erupted into loud cheers. 
 Barry tilted his head. “Tokyo?” he whispered to himself. “I thought Ramon Industries was Central City’s leading tech company? Why are they talking about Japan?” 
 Barry just assumed that Star Labs had been renamed because Thawne’s plan was foiled all those years ago in this timeline. While Harrison Wells was ingenious and a local celebrity, his fame had never extended beyond Star City. Especially since Central City was previously known to be a research town. There was still Tannhauser Industries and Mercury Labs as competitors. 
 Iris looked at him incredulously. “Did you hit your head in Costa Rica? Cisco Ramon is the richest man in America. I’m surprised he hasn’t expanded to Europe and Asia sooner.” 
 “What about Mercury Labs?” he questioned, just to see. 
 Wally frowned. “...It went bankrupt when I was still in elementary school. I heard that lady who owned it works for Mr. Ramon now.” 
 “Oh.” 
 Cisco turned to the woman who was with him in the elevator, she looked like she was his personal assistant. “I want a report on the robotics division, and the schedule for next week printed please, Suzanne.”
 “Yes, Mr. Ramon.” 
 Cisco’s stern voice softened. “And please bring me my precious cargo.” 
 “Immediately, sir.” The girl scurried away. 
 Cisco looked to the side where two men came flocking to him. He put his arms around them like a team huddle before a football game. What’s the scoop, boys?” 
  “As for LogicFrame, it’s a relatively small startup. The IP is expected to be in the low teens.” 
 Cisco nodded, patting them on their backs. “Offer them twenty mil.” 
 Barry gawked. 
 Iris pulled on his sleeve, trying to catch the multi-billionaire before he disappeared down his maze of halls, but he looked up and spotted them first. 
 “Huh,” he said, his tone inflecting distaste. “Well I told you never to come back here.” 
 There was not even a spark of recognition in Cisco’s eyes when he looked at him. Barry swallowed and lowered his gaze. It hurt. 
 Cisco turned swiftly on his heel to leave. 
 Iris let go of Barry to chase after him. “Cisco—Mr. Ramon! Mr. Ramon! Wait, please!” 
He marched briskly down the familiar halls Barry used to call his second home, his hands balling into fists. “I make you a friction-proof suit so your clothes don’t explode at mach 2 and you leave me out of your brother and sister war on crime. That was the deal.” 
 “We know,” Iris pleaded, “But listen to me, Mr. Ramon, we need help. The Rival on TV, don’t tell me you haven’t seen how bad it’s gotten. He’s been terrorizing the city to prove he’s the fastest like a raging idiot. God, who knows what he’ll do next!” 
 “We have to stop him,” Wally insisted. 
 Barry tried to follow along with the conversation, realizing he was missing some essential information about their apparent shared history. 
 It went down like a bitter pill, for Cisco to know Iris and Wally, but not him. His best friend. 
 Cisco pushed his hand against a keypad in the same spot in the hall where the Time Vault used to be, and the secret doors opened to reveal a large furnished office. He walked into it, picked up a basketball and tried to throw it through the hoop stationed at the top of the wall. It missed. 
 He threw up his hands, exasperated. 
 “Are you even listening to us?” Iris accused. 
 Cisco turned around, irritated. “Then stop him. Please, go with God, have fun.” His face twisted with pain. “But you know what happens when you mess with a speedster?” he pushed his shaking hand and tilted it to Iris’ shirt. “That. That’s what happens. You get a vibrating hand threatening to go right through your ribcage. No thanks, my family needs me.”
This didn’t sound like the Cisco Ramon Barry knew. The one who made toys for superheroes, who built cold guns in his spare time to conquer villains, and bounced with excitement at the opportunity to save the day. 
 What could have possibly happened to him that would change all that? 
  He took a step forward, trying to appease him. “Cisco, you’re not going to help us? That’s not in your nature.”
 Cisco startled, as if only just remembering Barry was there. He narrowed his eyes at him, scrutinizingly. “Who are you?” 
 Barry stammered, trying to think up a response. 
 Just then, the doors opened once more, and Suzanne the personal assistant walked in carrying in some high-tech carrier. It somewhat resembled a car seat. Barry paused. 
 “The report and schedules have been synced to your private server.”
 “Excellent, Suzie.”
 “And here’s your precious cargo, Mister Ramon.” 
 Cisco’s scowl brightened up into a splitting beam. He rushed to the woman, and took the carrier and brought it to his desk, then lifted up the cover. 
 There was a baby in there. 
 The richest man in America lifted up the sleeping infant and cooed. 
  Cisco had a baby. 
 Despite their serious discussion, Iris couldn’t help but smile at the sight. “She’s gotten so big!” 
 Barry walked forward, staring at the two in awe. The baby was young, but not a newborn, sleeping with little fluttering eyelashes and itty bitty fingers curled up against Cisco’s shoulder. Her lips were wet pink, matching her adorable dress. Barry felt his eyes water, incredibly proud for his best friend. His baby was beautiful—and, surprisingly, achingly familiar. It was the first time he’s ever seen the baby, ever heard of her existence, but somehow Barry felt a familiar pull in his heart. It was like he already knew her. Barry reached out his hand to stroke at her mop of curly brown hair. 
 Cisco glared, stepping away. “Why is this stranger trying to touch my child?” 
 Barry pulled away, as if burned. Cisco’s words had never stung so much before. 
 “Barry,” Iris hissed. “What’s the matter with you?” 
 “We’re friends!” Barry blurted, unable to take it anymore. This was Cisco’s life and it was what he deserved and Barry achingly wanted to be a part of it. It wasn’t right that this timeline stripped that away. Why wasn’t he at this baby’s birth? Why hadn’t they ever met? How could saving his mother put Cisco and Barry on such separate paths? 
 “We’re best friends! This is your baby girl and I’m supposed to be her uncle Barry! We’re supposed to know each other! We’re partners!” 
 Cisco scoffed, but he started to look uneasy. “Baby mine only has one uncle, and it’s my brother. I only have one partner, and it’s my future wife. I told you. I’ve never met you in my entire life.” 
 He turned to Wally. “I can’t believe you told this random person that I’ve helped The Flash. Especially with what happened after Zoom.” 
  After Zoom?
 “But I know Dante!” Barry insisted. Though he had no idea who Cisco’s partner was. “And I know what kind of person you are, Cisco. You’re the kind of person who—“
 Barry’s mind scattered for a moment, his train of thought slipping away. He doesn’t even remember why he was so adamant about what he was just about to say. 
 “I’m the kind of person who puts their family first,” Cisco said firmly. “That means distancing my baby from this madness.” 
 Barry felt woozy, sweat beading down his forehead as he saw double. He needed to sit down. 
 Iris gasped when Barry nearly collapsed. “Barry? Barry!” 
 He had to get out of here. There was something wrong with him. It happened first with the inkling of confusing with Joe, and then when he tried to save Wally, and now it was happening with Cisco. It was frightening and chilling and hauntingly wrong. 
 Barry sped out of Ramon Industries. He had to speak to Thawne. 
 ~.~ 
 “What's happening to me?” Barry demanded. He rattled the bars which kept the speed monster imprisoned. 
 “I was wondering when you'd notice.” 
 “It's like I'll be thinking of a moment from my past and then it vanishes. I can't get it back! Why?” 
 “Flashpoint,” Thawne replied calmly, throwing his discarded bag of Big Belly Burger into the corner of his cell. He explained it like a patronizing high school teacher, and that made it all the more infuriating. “It’s a side effect. See? I told you before. You don’t know what you’re doing. This new reality you've created is starting to overwrite the reality that you and I know. So your original life, your friends, your family, pretty soon, all of that will just fade away.” 
 “Then why isn’t that happening to you?” 
 Thawne’s brows furrowed for a moment. Then, with a burst of enlightenment, he cackled. “Your speed!” 
 No. No. 
 No, Barry loved his speed. He just didn’t care for being The Flash anymore. For having to deal with all this trauma and pain that accompanied it. This wasn’t why this was happening. There were a few glitches in this timeline that Barry hadn’t anticipated here and there, yes, of course, and it was unnerving to be losing his memories, but this wasn’t a terrible life! And there was no way he was going to be losing his powers. Thawne was trying to trick him. 
 “No, you’re lying. You just want me to get you out of here and that’s never going to happen.” 
 “Soon you won’t even remember that you’re The Flash,” Eobard taunted. “This world will become permanent, and time will set like concrete. You’ll be stuck here forever, and there will be nothing in your power to change it.” 
 “That’s fine by me!” He was not about to get intimidated. He was not going to second guess this. Not this perfect life. 
 “You know what you have to do.” Thawne threw back his head and laughed. “You have to take me back to that night and finish what I started.” 
 “You go to hell!” Barry spat. 
 Thawne’s words rattled in his head as he sped off, unable to leave him alone as he bolted through his city. To hell with Thawne, he didn’t know what he was talking about. He didn’t. He was a manipulator. This was his specialty, an elaborate trick. He just had to shake it off. He had to ignore it so they could defeat The Rival, and things could get back to normal.
 Barry can still get everything he wants. His date with Iris, a home he can return to with his mother and father, he’ll win Joe’s affections once again, and will manage to worm his way back into Cisco’s life. Wally will be the Kid Flash Central City needs. Not him. He’ll only help out this once. Only this one time. And most importantly, he’ll still have his speed. It was the life Barry should have. It was the one he deserved. 
 But the Reverse Flash’s damn words were getting to his head. 
  Now who’s the villain, Flash? Now who’s the villain? 
~.~ 
 Cisco jerked his back from his LogicFrames, seemingly spooked at the accuracy of his own invention. “Unbelievable. It’s like I was actually there.” 
 The richest man in America cried out in alarm as Barry brought in Wally back into his private office, and then ten seconds later Iris appeared, disheveled from the snack bar. 
 “I told you not to do that!” Cisco scolded, he turned to check on the baby seat.  “You’ll freak out the baby!” 
 Wally held his hands out. “It wasn’t me.” 
 Barry wiped at his brow, glad to be back in his suit. It was growing dust in the back of his closet for nearly six weeks. 
 “Who are you?” Iris asked, breathlessly, still smoothing out the wrinkles of her blouse. Barry was getting real tired of that question.
 “The man who’s gonna help you stop the Rival.” 
 After Barry attempted to explain his entire situation for the seventh time in the last half hour to continued blank stares, he knew something had to give. Cisco had his legs propped up on his office chair with his suit jacket slung over the back as he fed his gurgling infant a baby bottle, barely paying attention. 
 Iris had her hands in her hair as she paced back and forth, muttering to herself. “My high school ex-boyfriend is a hot speedster talking nonsense.” 
 Barry frowned. “It is not nonsense.” He opened the cap of the whiteboard marker to make a new diagram when her words finally caught up to him. He nearly dropped what he was holding. 
  “High school ex-boyfriend?!” 
 Iris looked like she didn’t know what to say. “...Did you...forget?” 
 Suddenly, Joe’s snarky attitude towards him made so much more sense. 
 “Okay!” he said, and forced to compartmentalize that fact so he could dissect it at a later time. He erased some equations that were on the whiteboard in Cisco’s handwriting. Cisco looked up from his daughter at the squeak of the eraser, protesting. “Those are my very important patents!” 
  “Sorry, Cisco—Uh. Mr. Ramon.” Barry coughed awkwardly. “Imagine this line is time, okay? I went back in time, stopped the Reverse Flash from killing my mom, and in doing so, created an alternate timeline. That’s what this is. It’s a whole new existence where,” he pointed to Wally. “You’re Kid Flash—”
 “—The Flash,” he interrupted. 
 “Kid Flash,” Cisco and Iris muttered under their breaths. 
 “Cisco is a billionaire with a baby, and—”
 Cisco made a disapproving noise, stroking the cheek of his little girl. His eyes went so soft. She was truly his whole world.  “—So you’re telling me there’s a timeline out there where I don’t have my little princess? Boy, that’s a glitch in the universe.” 
 Wally shook his head. “For the tenth time, I don’t buy it. This is my life. It didn’t just exist a month ago! I’ve always been me.”
 Cisco glanced up at Barry, looked him in the eyes for the first time without annoyance. “Look, I hear what you’re saying. I spied on you with my LogicFrames when you ran off all weirdly and overheard the conversation you had with the creepy yellow teletubby. I understand alternate timelines are theoretically possible. But this is the best life I could’ve ever asked for. The last time I got myself involved in their mess, things went really wrong. I did my part, and I’m sorry for your situation. I can give you money or something, if it’ll do any good. But I won’t be a part of this. Especially if it means losing my family.” 
 Barry shook his head. “I’m not trying to change anything about this timeline,” he said. “I just want us to defeat The Rival, and explain how I know all of you without sounding insane. But please, Cisco. You need to help. It was always what you’d do.” 
 “Eh,” Cisco replied, still skeptical. 
 It was crazy how stubborn he could be without Caitlin’s conviction. 
 The thought struck him dumb. How could Barry have never realized—
 “Wait. We’re missing something.” 
  Caitlin. 
 Barry sped to the monitors, hacking into the systems, surprised at how easy it was to find her. 
 “Hey!” Cisco said. “What are you doing—Don’t touch that!” Barry ignored Cisco, wooshed out to snatch Caitlin and brought her in. 
 She stumbled in her heels, wearing a lab coat, screaming. 
  “Zoom!? Please don’t!” 
 Cisco sat up straighter. “No, no! It’s not Zoom! It’s not Zoom, Caitlin!” 
 Caitlin crumpled to the floor and Cisco scrambled out of his chair as fast as he could while supporting his baby. “Look, it’s me. It’s just me. Cisco. You’re safe in my private office at Ramon Industries. Breathe with me, okay? And look who’s here!” Cisco brought his baby’s hand to wave at Caitlin, desperate to provoke a reaction. 
 Cisco turned from his crouch to glare at Barry, furious . “Why did you just kidnap my fiancée?” 
 “Barry,” Iris said, horrified at what just transpired. “What the hell?” 
 Caitlin’s trembling stopped when she heard Cisco’s voice. She opened her eyes one by one, taking in her surroundings. Barry watched as Cisco’s entire demeanour changed in complete surprise. Cisco cupped Caitlin’s face, stroking her hair, talking to her in private, soft whispers.   
 She still looked terrified, but she reached out for Cisco’s daughter, taking the baby into her arms. 
 “Hi baby,” she said in a shaky whisper, rocking her to her chest. 
 Barry covered his mouth, shocked. “Uh—” he said. “That’s Mr. Ramon’s—” 
 “Mommy’s here,” she continued.  “What a surprise.” 
 Barry gaped. “—I” He pointed at Caitlin, then Cisco, then stared at their baby, baffled. 
 “She’s her mother?” 
 Cisco got up from the floor, legitimately intimidating. “Speedsters are a no-go zone for her! How dare you do that.”  
 “Why did you bring Cisco’s girlfriend here?” Wally asked. 
 “Fiancée,” Cisco corrected. “That ring is big and expensive. It’s hard to miss, Kid Flash.” 
 “This is Dr. Caitlin Snow,” Barry explained unnecessarily. “In my timeline she’s a part of my team.” 
 “ No , that’s the mother of my child! The one person I forbade you two from bringing into your superheroing circus!” 
 “We didn’t know he would do that!” Iris snapped. 
 “No, we need her,” Barry insisted. “She’s a scientist.” 
 Caitlin looked up from the happy baby. “Oh, I’m not a scientist!” 
 “...You’re not?” 
 “No! I’m a part-time paediatric ophthalmologist.” 
 “The best paediatric ophthalmologist in the damn country,” said Cisco. He turned off his monitors and picked up the baby seat, slinging his arm around Caitlin’s waist. Caitlin turned her head to kiss Cisco. Like, on the mouth. Because they were lovers. And going to be married. Cisco and Caitlin. 
  Barry’s Cisco and Caitlin. 
 He needed to sit down. Again. 
 “We’re done here. I’m bringing them home.” Cisco flicked on his loudspeaker. “Melissa, this is Mister Ramon. Can you please phone the hospital to have them take over Dr. Snow’s last patients? There was an emergency.” 
 “Could you please just wait 5 minutes? I am so sorry for scaring you, Dr. Snow. It’s really important.” 
 “Important?” Caitlin repeated. She looked at Cisco. “Like Earth 2, important?” 
 Cisco sighed. “No, babe. Look, it’s not like Earth 2.” He looked at Barry pointedly. “Tell her it’s not like Earth 2.” 
 “It’s not,” Barry promised. “We just want to put an end to The Rival.” 
Iris cleared her throat, tapping on Barry’s shoulder. “Can I talk with you in private?”
 He nodded reluctantly. She pulled him out into the hall, as Cisco, Caitlin and Wally stayed inside.  
 “Look, I know this is hard to believe.” 
 “No,” she said, “That’s just it. Once you started speaking clearly, it made sense. It’s like Mr. Ramon said. We’ve been to Earth 2. I do believe you.” 
 “You do?” 
 She shrugged her shoulders, helplessly. Her expression resigned. “I have a good life. I have a good job. I love my brother and my dad. But something has been off. Something has been missing, and the feeling that something wasn’t right in my life, the moment I saw you again in Jitters, that went away.” 
 Barry’s face softened. 
 “We’re more than exes from high school, are we? We’re something to each other, where you come from.” 
 How do you explain to the most important person in your life that that’s who they are? 
 “Yes,” he admitted. He took her hand.
 Her breath hitched. “What?” she asked. 
 “It’s escaped definition. But it’s love.” 
 She nodded, unable to tear her gaze from his eyes. “I thought so.” 
 Cisco poked his head out. “Hey. Timelined-Crossed Lovers. We think we found something.” 
 The moment passed. Iris pulled her hand away, eager to follow Cisco and his lead. 
 He brought them over to his computer systems, which he had turned on again, smirking at the way Caitlin was cuddling her baby in one hand, and typing away with an intent look on her face with the other. 
 “For some reason my fiancée wants to help, you’re lucky she’s convincing and hella intelligent.”
 “I have always wondered why no one turned the speed cameras in the city to register near sonic velocities,” Caitlin explained. She went sheepish. “I have PTSD. So I try to learn the best I can about the safety measures. It helps.” 
 Cisco hovered over her frame, reading whatever webpage she had pulled up and kissed her cheek comfortingly. “She was kidnapped by Zoom when she was pregnant,” he told Barry. His tone went hard. “That’s why we don’t do this crap anymore.” 
 “But maybe by helping with The Rival we can rid Central City of speedsters permanently,” Caitlin said. 
 Cisco sighed. “Yeah. Seems like a ready built early warning system.” 
 After a few minutes, thanks to Cisco and Caitlin’s teamwork, they were able to pinpoint The Rival’s location by reprogramming the cameras. According to Cisco’s satellites, sonic velocities were currently detected at the old sawmill by Williamson. 
 Iris pulled out her phone. “I’ll send an anonymous tip to CCPD. My dad would want to set up a perimeter.” 
 Cisco and Caitlin were lost in their own happy bubble. 
 “You do make a great hero, you know,” Caitlin said to Cisco. 
 Cisco blushed, tilting her chin to kiss her. “You’re my hero,” he murmured against her lips. They continued to kiss over their baby. 
 Barry side eyed them. It was weird. It would never not be weird. Cisco and Caitlin. Cisco Ramon and Caitlin Snow. Lip locking. 
 Kid Flash followed his gaze. “You get used to it,” he said. 
 Wally pulled on the cowl of his bright yellow suit, which Barry still couldn’t get over. “You follow my lead.” 
 “No,” Barry said, prepping for battle. He lifted his own cowl. He knew he said to himself that he’d let Wally take over the crime fighting. But that can start tomorrow. “You’ll follow my lead.” 
“Listen to him, Wally,” Iris advised. “He's The Flash.” 
 ~.~ 
It turned out The Rival was named Edward Clariss, and he had it in for Kid Flash. 
 Barry and Wally teamed up against him after his creepy little monologue— they all had those nowadays—but then Cisco and Caitlin were talking through the coms about weird weather picking up, and they split up. 
 Barry should’ve known he was going to mess up. He should’ve left things for Wally, because he lost his train of thought just as he was about to get this all under control. He turned to forfeit, to make Wally give the final play and be the hero of his city like he deserved. 
 He stumbled, and Iris called for him through the earpiece. “Are you okay?” 
 He stared at the red suit he was wearing, clueless. “I don’t know who I am!” 
 “You’re the Flash, Barry! You explained it to us ten times. You’re from another timeline, you’re a speedster, a hero, my hero, okay? And you can do this you can—” 
 Memories returned one by one, fighting crime in Star Labs, defeating Zoom, fighting a telepathic gorilla, King Shark, being the town’s saviour, being The Flash. He got up on his feet. This might be the last time Barry ran in this suit, but he was going to make it his— 
 It was then the gunshots cracked through the air. 
 Everyone froze. 
 Barry whipped his head in the direction of the cry, horrified at what he saw; Kid Flash pressing a hand to his chest, blood seeping through the incredibly thick leather. He dropped to his knees, then keeled over. 
  “Wally!” 
  “Wally!?”  Joe came sprinting towards them, tearing off his protective gear as he rushed to Kid Flash, who had crumpled down in front of Captain Mendez. He ripped off the mask, to see his son’s eyes. 
 Caitlin and Cisco were panicking in his ears, but Barry simply grabbed Wally and zoomed away with him from the scene. He dropped Wally on the couch of Cisco’s office, then ran back to get Joe. 
 Cisco was cursing left and right, Iris tripping over Cisco’s rolling basketball in her haste to get to her brother. The vitals from his suit Cisco had pulled up on his monitor were going haywire, beeping sporadically in the fancy office, until it sped up dramatically. 
 Everything erupted at once. 
 “The Rival is still out there!” Cisco told them, but his warning fell on deaf ears. 
 “Where’s the bleeding?!” Iris said, already trying to help Cisco unpeel the suit. “I thought you said the suit was supposed to be  bulletproof!” 
  “Supposed to be!” Cisco snapped back, stressed. “I didn’t realize the speedster couldn’t outrun bullets!” 
 Joe cried out. “Wally?!? Kid Flash was Wally all along!? Iris, how could you?” He sounded too bewildered to be mad, his voice weak and faint. 
 Iris’s face was crestfallen. “Dad, it was never supposed to happen like this!”
 Barry grabbed Caitlin’s arm. “You have to help him, he lost a lot of blood.” 
 “Wait—” Barry interrupted himself, Joe’s words catching up to him. “You never told Joe?” 
 “The hell she didn’t!”
Caitlin did the very opposite of what he’d expected. Instead of rolling up her sleeves to help, she backed away, fearful. “I’m not that kind of doctor!” she yelled. 
 “So you’re just going to let him die?” 
 “I don’t know how to do cardiac surgery!? I’m a children’s eye doctor! I can’t—” 
 “He’s not going to die!” Iris bit out, putting pressure onto the wound as she called 911. “He has regenerative healing, he should be able to survive this.” 
 But she didn’t sound so confident, her voice shaking. She glared at Barry, tears running down her face. “Aren’t you supposed to be The Flash ? Why did you bring him here!? Bring him to a hospital!” 
 She was right, and he didn’t know why he couldn’t get his legs to move, frozen still. 
 Cisco had the suit off Wally now, trying to perform CPR as he called staff for backup over his loud PDA system. Caitlin began to hyperventilate, and grabbed her baby. 
 “Where are you going!?” Iris cried. “You’re the closest thing to a doctor we have! We need you!” 
 But Caitlin fled. 
 Cisco looked up from Wally, concerned. “Caitlin!” He got up to go after her, despite everyone’s vehement protests, pushing him back down.
 But mere seconds paused from his desperate attempt of rescue was enough to let Wally slip through their fingers, and his heart rate flatlined. 
 Barry couldn’t move as Iris screamed. 
 Couldn’t move as Joe staggered back, then collapsed. 
 Couldn’t move as Cisco’s staff came running in with emergency crews, too late to save father or son. 
 Couldn’t move as Iris got up, yelling at him, screaming at him, pounded his fists against him to stop being useless and do something.  
 It was like losing his mother all over again. But this was all his fault. 
 “Barry,” Iris said, eerily quiet, but her voice rose in pitch as she grew hysterical.  “Get out. Get out. Get out! Get out!” 
 So he did. 
 ~.~ 
 Barry had never hated someone so much as he did Eobard Thawne. 
 Himself, maybe, in the final moments of Flashpoint, but that cruel smile the Reverse Flash shot him after Barry begged him to go back and kill his mother will haunt him until he dies. 
 ~.~ 
 Barry walked through Star Labs on eggshells. Everything looked normal, but he was exhausted. 
 “Barry,” Caitlin said, rising up from her desk and smoothing down her shirt. “You’re here!” 
 “...Was I not supposed to be?” 
 “The funeral yesterday...I just assumed, you’d take the day off to be by yourself.” 
 He shook his head. “I don’t want to be by myself.” He chanced a glance at Iris, who was with Wally over by the other desk at the Cortex as they talked over the speaker phone with Joe. He could finally relax, relieved. “I want to be with my family.” 
 Caitlin mustered a smile. “That’s nice.” 
 Barry frowned, looking around. “Where’s Cisco?” 
 Her face clouded over with anger. “That’s not funny,” she told him, picking up her coat with a scowl. “I’m going to chalk that up to grief. I’ll see you later, Barry.” 
 He turned to glance at her from over his shoulder as she stalked out, confused. He hesitantly walked over to Iris and Wally. “I thought we could all have dinner together? What’s up with her?”
 Wally shared a look with Iris, especially when Barry threw his arms around him. He patted his back awkwardly. “Are you kidding me? You know why Cisco isn’t here.” But that meant nothing to Barry. “We’ll go with you with Dad, but tough luck on getting those two together. You’ll have to pick either or.”
“My bet is on Cisco because you just pissed off Caitlin,” Iris mused. 
 Barry frowned. “Cisco and Caitlin—?” He remembered the other timeline and bit his tongue. 
 “They still won’t talk, Barry,” Iris said exasperatedly. “You know that. Text me your dinner plans. I have to go to work.” 
 The two left, leaving Barry in the Cortex alone. He went to Cisco’s workshop, looking around. 
 It all seemed in order, gadgets and tools scattered around all over his table. So it couldn’t be that he left, or that he quit, or that he’s gone away. 
 Barry sat down on Cisco’s stool, feeling like he’d missed something crucial. It was then, he noticed something, buried under a pile of blueprints, candy bags, coiled springs and a hammer. He slid out the picture frame from where it lay face down against the table, and propped it up carefully. 
 He stared at it as shattered pieces of glass fell out of the frame, dropping onto the table. 
 Barry couldn’t help but notice the strategic placing of the hammer, now, and how the smashed glass centered right over Caitlin’s smiling face. 
 “Oh god,” he whispered, horrified. “What did I do?!”
~.~
Now who’s the villain, Flash? Now who’s the villain? 
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xtinadoesstarwars · 4 years
Text
I don’t know why I’m doing this but I am.
Background
So I recently finished my master’s degree at the University of Oklahoma. You would think after writing 140 pages worth of research, I would not want to start yet another writing project but here we are.
I have been a Star Wars nerd since I saw Revenge of Sith in theaters three times because I could NOT get over Anakin Skywalker in May 2005. I think I was in seventh grade at the time, just on the precipice of my teen years. To be honest, my infatuation with Anakin (Hayden Christensen) had more to do with that than how amazing I thought the Star Wars universe was.
My mom and her college friends took me to see Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones but honestly, elementary school me was not into scary red man with horns OR Jango Fett clones. 
Anyway, after I started thirsting for Anakin/Hayden, I became utterly OBSESSED with Star Wars. I can’t remember if I saved money or asked for the special edition DVD set of the original trilogy, but after that, it was over for me. My Xanga (remember that?) page became a Jedi-worshipping page. I watched the movies over and over and over again. I never touched the books or comics because well...that was a lot to cover. I was content using Wookieepedia or whatever the equivalent was in the 2000s to look up any lingering questions I had.
And then Disney bought Lucasfilm. At first, oh I was angry. I was appalled. They were going to ruin the SANCTITY of my beloved Star Wars. It was announced that the books and comics and other "Expanded Universe” media were going to become part of the “Legends” brand, therefore non-canonical. For those of you who don’t understand canon, here’s an explainer:
Canon: Describes people, events, times, places, etc. that have actually appeared, been mentioned, or happened in the movies, TV shows, and certain media.
Non-canon: Relationships, people, events, places, etc. that have never been shown, spoken of, or hinted at in movies, TV shows, books, etc. 
From Wallaroo Media: 
Since Disney bought Lucasfilm in 2012, there has been a substantial amount of new STAR WARS material, including comic books, novels, TV series, and games. What casual fans may not know is that all of these productions and publications are now officially part of the new canon, meaning that they are included in the fictional history of that galaxy far, far away. With this new STAR WARS canon timeline, you can now stay current on everything STAR WARS, and how these materials are connected with both the old and new films.
I perked up at this because it meant that I could conceivably “catch-up” and be the Star Wars know-it-all I’ve always wanted to be but never had the time. Obviously 2012 was 8 years ago and all I’ve managed to do is complete two degrees, watch the movies, and read a couple of books. 
To get to the true heart of why I am doing this, I have to get personal with you, reader. The world is a pretty fucking depressing and anxiety-inducing place right now and I suffer from depression and anxiety. Sometimes I take medication for it, other times I’m just out here raw-dogging life, as a meme once so eloquently put it. So I know what it’s like to feel like there’s nothing worth living for, even though logically I know that there is, and the anxiety of losing something that you love. If I don’t give myself huge projects to do, my depression and anxiety cause me to want to give up, to lay in bed for days on end, to not eat, to shut down. I need things to be excited about and commit myself to (other than work and my other hustles). As a nerd, I’ve used fandom to pull myself out of a lot of dark places throughout my life. As a child, I was shy and lonely and used books to escape from reality and to imagine wonderful worlds to different from ours. I guess I’m doing the same thing again now.
After I watched the Rise of Skywalker, I felt an intense wave of depression come over me. I can’t seem to accept that it’s over. This particular saga has ended, the stories I have come to know and love will no longer have additions for me to consume. There is a big reason why this specific episode affected me so much, but we’ll get to it later. It’s a story and explanation for another time and also filled with spoilers so I’ll give you more time to GO SEE THIS MOVIE.
Methods
This is how I know I’m a nerd. I organized this post starting with my introduction and background, and now I’m moving into my methods, aka how I’m going to conduct my project. Some things never change. 
My idea is to start with the chronological beginning of the canon timeline according to this webpage. I started a spreadsheet which records the title and author of the media, the type of media (book, comic, movie, etc.), era, short synopsis, release date, when I started and finished, what I learned, what I liked, and what I didn’t like. I’m sure that this spreadsheet will expand to include other things but my goal here is to create something that will help me track my knowledge of the Star Wars universe. I’m a researcher by nature, what can I say? 
I’m giving myself one year to do all of this but I’m not holding myself to it. If it happens, cool, if not, I’m gonna keep going until it’s finished. I don’t know if anyone else has ever tried this before but it’s an idea that I can’t get out of my head so I might as well just try it.
If you made it to the bottom of this post, congratulations and thank you. You a real one! If you have any questions or comments leave them here or catch me on Twitter @ tina_ffg or on my personal Tumblr @odasjimi.
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afreakingdork · 5 years
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So this isn’t really a review as it is more a rant. I had a reaction last year that was very dangerous and it has taken me a long time to recover. When I am not feeling good I love turning to cartoons because they represent low stress and easy on the mind entertainment when everything else seems out of control. I cut the cord with cable years ago and I only have Hulu and Netflix to turn to for entertainment. I am a huge buff when it comes to cartoons in general and I even ran a club back in my college days dedicated to teaching others about the joy of cartoons, but recently I took on watching Twelve Forever on Netflix, a show that if you remember was posted as a short back in 2016 for Cartoon Network to pilot test new shows (a practice they have been doing for a hot minute now). Now I am going to put a majority of my rant under the cut just in case people don’t want to look at the text but I will simplify my point here (feel free to stop reading if you disagree). I don’t like the message that this show portrays about vices and growing up...
Now I have done the basic research and I understand the creator’s past issues with alcohol. Now because of that fact I would assume this was a direct correlation in a show about escaping the real world, but instead we are left with 25 episodes where Reggie doesn’t really learn anything. Reggie is a selfish character and an outcast. I totally get it, I was a wild child myself and I couldn’t care less if I had friends or didn’t. One time my mom tried to punish me by taking everything out of my room, but my imagination was so strong that I was having a blast playing with literally nothing. I see myself in Reggie in so many ways, but there are many ways I don’t. She is incredibly selfish as Todd kindly points out. She is so selfish that it manifests in the show via the fact that Ester is constantly trying to put some meaning into Endless. It takes all the way until the end of the series to even find out how Reggie made a way for herself to enter even though Ester has been asking those questions all along. Reggie constantly just brushes any comments about Endless away with an ‘I don’t care’ or ‘It’s more fun to accept Endless the way it is,’ which is awful considering how dangerous Endless actually is. 
A big departure from the short is the added gross-out humor that wasn’t necessarily as prevalent in those first 8 minutes. I was jarred in that first episode when they started to lean heavily on creepy or downright gross comedy as I wasn’t expecting anything like that from this supposed fun and magical world. Instead we have an entire episode where our trio plans to spend all of spring break on Endless only to have Reggie removed from the equation due to appendicitis. Ester and Todd LITERALLY lose their minds due to their prolonged stay on Endless and when Reggie can finally make her appearance to save them, she has to physically force them out. They regain their memories and are visibly scared by what has happened to them, while Reggie is just mad that they ‘ignored her’ when they were clearly under some sort of spell. She doesn’t care about their well-being and instead chooses to go back into Endless alone because she missed her time there and her friends are just disrespecting her. The episode ends with Reggie lamenting that her fictional friends are her real friends. This ominous ending is just that and this idea never really comes to fruition further. 
This idea is expanded on further when we meet Elmer who is a child that was orphaned and decided to move his life into Endless permanently. We are shown that he has not only lost his mind, but his humanity. While Todd and Ester are scared by this proposition, Reggie is instead spurned on. She still wants to live her life on Endless and believes she is stronger than Elmer in that she won’t succumb to the same fate. I see how this can be a definite parallel to addiction, but with 25 episodes the story that is told doesn’t even get close to showing how this mentality is a bad thing. Are the writers just assuming they are going to get another season? More story progress was had in the 10 episode arc that was Over the Garden Wall than this and I find that totally appalling. One of the main reasons I stopped watching Teen Titans Go! was because the episodes started to become moral-less.Let me clarify that I don’t expect kids cartoons to have morals! I mean I watched Adventure Time and I can totally get down on a whole episode that amounts to nothing but a fart joke. The issue i have is when you set yourself up for something real, something that can impact that life of a child, that you are doing a disservice to a very impressionable target demographic. I am worried about the kids that will watch Twelve Forever and think that this type of escapist attitude is alright in the world. This is why ensemble casts are so important in cartoons. It’s healthy to surround yourself with other people. Not caring about others isn’t cool just because you want to be weird and quirky. There are other weird and quirky people out there that will love and support you. You shouldn’t just be the way you are so boldly that it alienates you from everyone else. I’m not saying to not be yourself. You should always be yourself boldly, but human beings are inherently apart of society and it’s healthy for them to interact. 
Now this idea leads into a larger concept about the infantilization of millennials and I am a millennial that is well into their 20s who loves watching cartoons. I know that this idea of nostalgia is ruling media right now and I am happily apart of it.  To people who tell me I am too old to watch cartoons I of course say they are being ridiculous and cartoons have always been created for kids with the parents who have to ‘suffer’ through them in mind. Parents are always in the background of creators thoughts because they will always been inadvertently watching the cartoons also, but this message of  infantilization in Twelve Forever scares me. I am scared for Reggie that she will never grow up and will be lost to Endless forever because she was never encouraged to grow emotionally for the sake of her friends. The whole reason she made it into Endless was as an escape because she can’t deal with her emotions and no one is trying to help her. This brings me to the characterization of parents in Twelve Forever. I find the parents in the show to be downright horrifying. 
Reggie’s mom, Judy, genuinely thought it was a good idea to give her daughter a bra on her 12th birthday full well knowing that one of her party guests was going to be a boy. Just typing out that sentence I can feel the second hand embarrassment. Judy believes she is doing the right thing by shoving make-up at her daughter because that is what she liked at that age. It doesn’t matter to her that Reggie is an obvious ‘tomboy’ who even asked for a specific new action figure for her birthday. She can only see her daughter through her own eyes and does nothing to try to get closer or understand her on any emotional level. Now you can of course say that she is working as a nurse and those are undeniably grueling hours, but Reggie is straight up honest with her mom and her mom blatantly ignores this. Judy even has a friend, Kathy, in the show who is an archetype for a less than feminine woman. She takes no cues from Kathy when it comes to raising her own less than feminine daughter and instead just exasperatedly can’t understand why Reggie is the way she is. Now I was a ‘tomboy’ (it’s in quotes because I don’t care for the phrase, gender roles are bullshit) who grew up after my mother refused to even dress me in girls clothes. My mom was so frustrated with unhealthy depictions of women that I wasn’t allowed to have Barbies and I didn't mind this, I could crash my Hot Wheels all day and make a parade float out of Beanie Babies without a care, but when it later came to choosing my own clothes my mother never intercepted. It was always my choice, because expression is important, but Judy can barely meet Reggie halfway in the episode where they go to the mall to pick out an outfit for Reggie to wear to a wedding. She ends up forcing Reggie into an uncomfortable and ill-fitting purple dress and tries to make up for her actions by letting Reggie pick out equally ill-fitting big ole’ red boots. I don’t find this to be compromise, this is nothing but simple placation. Judy knows what she did was wrong, but she refuses to see any other way to move forward on the matter and the show thinks that this is a heartfelt way to wrap things up to which I wholeheartedly disagree.  
Another failed parental image that scares me is Todd’s dad. This is a man we see only once and can only imagine through Todd’s eyes. This is a man that is in the midst of some mid-life crisis and has somehow gotten custody of his kids in a divorce. He has a new wife(girlfriend?) who he pours so much money into making her happy by taking her out constantly and doing what she suggests (dying his hair) that he can barely pay his bills and is shown to be repeatedly selling off Todd’s objects to make ends meet. Todd even tried to hide a coin collection only to have it inadvertently found by his little sisters, who are wild due to lack of parenting, and then sold immediately by his dad for cash. This unhealthy situation is of course what leads Reggie to showing Todd Endless, but the show again puts no effort into illustrating that this is a horrible situation for Todd. Instead it is just his circumstance to give some semblance of meaning to the fact that he wants to escape reality. This paired with everything else is exactly the reason why Twelve Forever scares me so much. It depicts these incredibly unhealthy and downright dangerous situations as simply existences that people have to suffer through. If I were a kid that had watched that, I would just thought that was normal and not something that is inherently wrong with our society that should not be perpetuated or fixed! This is not representation, this is normalization. 
P.S. But hey, Reggie has a crush on a girl so we should support lgbtqia+ media? Well here’s my little piece of that. I love my little lesbeans. If you’ve read any of my reviews you know it’s something I crave, but Reggie is so misplaced in her emotional development that just coming to terms with the fact that she may have done something embarrassing in front of her crush is enough for her. She then shuns Conelly (and the options of gaining friends in the real world who like the same quirky stuff as she does), so that she can once again return to Endless. It’s less satisfying then yuri for the sake of perv pandering in my opinion. 
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sillyfudgemonkeys · 5 years
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Who’s worse and why: Futaba or Makoto?
I mean if you’ve read this blog you probably know who I’m gonna choose, but as for why….welp under the cut
I’d have to say Makoto, both as a person and as a character. I know my bf ranks Futaba as the worse solely because of her BS hacking. And listen, for me Makoto and Futaba are both freaking close, and me saying “Futaba’s hacking isn’t as bad as Makoto” is more an opinion than fact, and shouldn’t boost any positive feelings/pride for Futaba fans because I chose her hacking over Makoto. Her hacking is HORRIBLE I was to make that clear, I still hate it. I’d probably hate Futaba more if it wasn’t for the fact that Makoto gets a single amount of criticism that we all have to come and explain ourselves (that’s the only good thing about Futaba is that her fanbase doesn’t come for my throat, but it also doesn’t mean I think about how crappy she is/think as critically about her as much as Makoto). 
With that out of the way I’ll give reasons for disliking both of them:
Makoto:
She never gets dragged. So you might know that I hate the P5MC, I think he’s an asshole and never gets called out on it (and not just he has asshole options, but he does asshole things we can’t not do). One thing I hate is that he drags like Anne, Ryuji, and Yusuke a lot like you wouldn’t believe (like people who are very dedicated to him). But I don’t recall really ever getting a single drag options for Makoto, WHEN SHE WASN’T ON THE TEAM AND SHE WAS AT HER WORSE (even when she drove off our only lead). It was mostly neutral stuff, defiant (not the same as asshole), or begging her not to tell on us. It’s just weird that a lot of other characters will get dragged for not really doing anything wrong, but she DOES screw us over and we don’t get to drag her at least once?
Gets away with A LOT of shit. Like she victim blames Anne, and Anne apologizes? And then has the audacity to say Anne and her are the SAME?! No boo, Anne didn’t know about the abuse, but YOU DID. Anne didn’t report the abuse because she didn’t know, you admit you didn’t report it because YOU DIDN’T CARE ENOUGH. You stalk us, take photos and video recordings without our permission (btw illegal in Japan and would be thrown out in court), but then get surprised when we (mostly Anne/Ryu/Yusuke since they can talk obvie) get mad at you? Complain about how people don’t know your struggles when they yell at you, but you are literally the one causing their grief (so of course they’d yell). Was literally an asshole from the get-go from introduction(she literally insulted Anne from her first words, no wonder Anne didn’t like her) , and pretty much the reason why every scene started to go to shit (only time she didn’t come in like an ass was the scene they called her useless in, and 1) considering her track record they probs assumed, and rightfully so, she was coming to put more pressure on them, which they didn’t need, and seque into 2))
Number 2, she was being useless to the PT! She didn’t do shit while investigating, instead just hovering over us being like “did you get the info? You know will happen if you don’t do this. SO you better do this!” And it’s like???? Bitch, you didn’t even bother to help. You’re useless in the one thing you can do (cause we know you won’t help in the Metaverse). Hell she wasn’t even the person who broke the news about Kaneshiro! We heard a rumor about it on the train as the MC/Mona before Makoto did! But the game made us freaking wait cause we needed the illusion of her doing like…ANYTHING. She also drove away our one gd lead, like WHAT THE FUDGE?! We’re all out here busting our asses and you are just sitting on yours, you really are useless. And she also withheld vital info…..
Withholding info. She does this twice, once during the Kaneshiro arc where we have to waste time investigating this one kid (and we know she knows cause he goes to her after we talk to him, upset cause she might’ve blabbed, oh if only, but like she could’ve asked him questions and she could’ve relayed the same info but NO!). She also doesn’t tell us about Sae’s Palace, and like….that would’ve been FANTASTIC considering we were all like “oh man wish we had a Palace we could go into” the entire gd game.
Her actions and words about her don’t line up (wow awkward sentence XP). People keep describing her as “scary” and “oh man you better not make her mad” and like acting like I should be scared of her. But like???? She’s really such a pushover, she needs to be saved countless times, she showcases no hidden fire-y side (in fact Anne shows that off more, but no the game is too busy dragging her through the mud for some reason). Hell even in the dance games, her and Anne’s reaction of Futaba trying to grope them is different. Makoto is shy and tries to run away iirc, Anne looks like she has the face of murder (Futaba better sleep with one eye open, like jesus what was that game thinking, 1) poor taste to do that to Anne, 2) doesn’t seem like she was having fun and…..that’s so out of place). Just….it’s just really annoying to hear it over and over, and then she needs help over and over. Like she puts up barely any resistence to the guys hitting on them at the beach, all while Anne is ready to throw down and raising a shit fit (understandable, but why isn’t Makoto????) and then if you say “you guys did well” MAKOTO is the one that responds and is like “Oh thanks but it was getting dicey” like bitch you just stood there, Anne was ready to cut a bitch, why are you responding you didn’t do anything????
She takes up too much screen time doing nothing. Her big job is to connect the player with Sae…..and she does a shit job at it. We learn pretty much nothing about Sae or her relationship, except it’s strained (but not TOO strained). She explains easy to understand stuff, but like we already had Mona for that so no need for her. She’s shit at her role as a strategist, 1) she doesn’t do a whole lot of it, 2) the few plans she’s come up with, the majority have failed, 3) her role is useless in a game where we already have a leader and choices are supposed to “matter” so why sin’t the MC just a double duty strategist? 4) Her CoOp ability should’ve already been a part of Futaba’s/Mona’s skill set (like with past Navis). She adds nothing, instead takes screen time away from other characters, as well as removing choice from the players (and possibly coming up with their own plans as well as ideas to utilize everyone). 
Futaba:
Her hacking is unrealistic and OP. Just….it’s just bad in and of itself.
Her hacking removes choice and other means to get around a problem. So many times it’s just “*points at something* Futaba hack it” and it’s done. Like Sae’s dungeon, a lot of people say it showcased Goro’s abilities, but all I remember is him saying “Futaba I choose you! Use hack” and that’s how it mostly went down. So like Makoto, her role screws the player out of a more enriching gameplay experience. 
Also takes up too much screen time. I mean it’s mostly for her stupid hacking too, but if it wasn’t for that and her it could’ve been utilized for other characters. It’s also weird cause she takes up a lot because of her mom, but we don’t get a whole lot about her mom…..it’s mostly just a plot device rather than a character. It just leaves you unfulfilled. 
Her mental illness is horribly written, pandering (in a sense of people thinking it’s cute and you should date her cause of it, not them having a character with mental illness in and of itself is pandering just the……fetishization of it is), and inconsistent (her gameplay and story segregation, aka CoOp and main story segregation, is just so appalling). I think I did one rank of her CoOp and she was all like “MC only you helped me. You’re the reason I started to get better! I can only go outside if you are with me MC! MC MC MC! PT who? Only MC!” and then literally the next f****ing day the main story progresses, she’s waiting outside with Yusuke and everyone is like “You went outside by yourself?!” and Yusuke’s like “nah I picked her up” HMMMM YOU SEEM FINE WITH THE PT WHAT’S THIS ABOUT MC ONLY?! It’s also…..I hate her crush, it’s soooooo unhealthy. She starts to become SO DEPENDENT on you, and is saying some very worrying things like “I don’t think I can do this on my own without you” like all the time. And apparently if you romance her she suddenly becomes more independent, which I don’t think would happen….romancing her route sounded more like I’d encourage her behavior rather than her deciding to just suddenly not do that. The friendship route was the only time it felt like it was realistic, we turn her down and we help her make one more step by herself and let her walk around Akihabara alone within a safe distance and then she gets used to it so it’s possible for her to leave all by herself later. Only time it was semi realistic, because any other time they just bring the freaking mental illness up whenever they freaking please. That’s also doesn’t take in the fact how they “cured” her so they could have a beach episode. A crash course and friendship isn’t gonna cure you suddenly (and it’s not like they actually stole her heart, which I hate she keep saying they did), and that’s an unhealthy mindset and unfair to a friend who wants to help but isn’t fair to put the burden on them to cure you. 
She’s kind of an asshole, like Makoto is an asshole before she joins, but Futaba…..I just dunno how most people even get along in the PT. It’s not social awkwardness, she’s just a straight up douche sometimes and I don’t like it (esp when you can’t call her out). It’s not just her, Yusuke is too and so is Mona (and Ryu is to Mona but he’s not an asshole, but he’s not 100% a good boi, but MC is also an asshole too, but sometimes he can be good). 
I also just don’t like her dungeon. Like how it’s written. But I could say that for most of P5′s dungeons. It tries to imitate P4 but…..doesn’t do what P4 did right. Her’s just steps on my toes even more cause it’s more closer to P4 than any other dungeon, and it’s a gd shame they didn’t expand on P4′s way of doing it (aka you don’t get the info basically handed to before going into the dungeon, there’s actually a revelation as you go through XP)
(Not points against either, but I find it weird that it feels like Futaba is closer to Makoto rather than Anne…..like nothing is special between Futaba and Makoto for them to be kinda like that, but like Anne was the one to technically appealed to Futaba to get her out of the closet…..You’d think she’d cling to Anne more….Sorry more of a confusing writing issue but since we were talking about these two and my mind wandered 8U)
Edit: I think I answered all my points (albeit it’s the abridged version), but god forbid I missed a couple.
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