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#( soul sister. );; about: joanna.

cainiine · 4 months

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𝐅𝐔𝐋𝐋 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄 : Joanna Doe. 𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄(𝐒) : Jo.

╳ 𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐒.

♔ 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐓𝐇𝐒.

🖌 𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐒 & 𝐇𝐎𝐁𝐁𝐈𝐄𝐒.

𝐅𝐔𝐋𝐋 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄 : Johnny Doe. 𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄(𝐒) : Scarecrow. Chief.

╳ 𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐒.

♔ 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐓𝐇𝐒.

🖌 𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐒 & 𝐇𝐎𝐁𝐁𝐈𝐄𝐒.

tagged by : @priwenshallprevail, thank you! tagging : you!

#(( yee haws onto this blog ))#( soul sister. );; about: joanna.#( hell's cowboy. );; about: johnny.

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orionsangel86 · 1 year

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Watching The Sandman again for the hundreth time and I know everyone always loves to focus on Dreamling, but can we talk about Rose Walker for a moment?

The Sandman is often applauded (and complained about) for being an extremely gay show, but I particularly love how even the characters who aren’t canonically gay come across as extremely gay.

Take Rose Walker. The main character of The Doll’s House story. Neither the show nor the comics ever give Rose a sexuality, but there are some very glaring factors that heavily support her being queer.

The first time we see Rose is in episode 5 24/7. Judy, the lesbian at the diner who has had a fight with her girlfriend Donna, calls Rose and asks if Rose knows where Donna is. We know that Rose considers both Judy and Donna close friends and has a picture of Judy in her apartment.

Rose’s only other friend that we know of besides Lyta Hall (who she got to know via proximity since they were neighbours) is her friend Carl who she clearly is close enough with to let him house sit for her (even though he has sex with The Corinthian on her bed!).

So her closest friends are a lesbian couple and a gay man. I know I know straight people can be friends with queer people but statistically speaking queers flock together. Its more likely that Lyta is the token straight in the friend group than Rose AND Lyta both being straight.

I also question her choice of seeking out accomodation in Cape Kennedy. Isn’t it interesting how she ends up in a very strange B&B also managed by a gay drag artist and filled with colourful characters including Chantal and Zelda (I know their relationship is supposed to remain ambiguous but imo the show also leans more into them being lesbians due to Chantal’s dream where she calls them “soul sisters” and “gothic brides” and I dunno I just think the fact she refers to them as brides is pretty telling!)

Of all your accomodation choices in Florida, this in particular seems like the kind of place one would go to if they were specifically looking for somewhere advertised as “LGBT friendly”. All the characters staying at the B&B are either canonically queer or heavily queer coded.

Gilbert/Fiddlers Green isn’t technically human, but his whole aura is distinguished older gay man - he’s played by Stephen Fry after all!

Also I could go on about Barbie (who I theorise found the accomodation for her and Ken) but without revealing any comic spoilers, she also later surrounds herself with basically all queer people. I know in the comics she is strictly heterosexual, but nah she dreams like a queer theatre kid on speed or something lmao. That girl is a bisexual disaster all the way and yeah I may be projecting on her as a fellow blonde overly dramatic dreamer and disaster bisexual but I claim her for my own okay just let me have this.

So yeah, the queer friendship groups, the specific seeking out of an LGBTQ friendly b&b in Florida, and the fact that she literally wears rainbows in her hair and I think its clear enough that that girl is a baby queer if ever I saw one.

Due to the merging of Rose and Lyta’s stories in the Netflix show, we should actually get to see more of Rose in future seasons. In the comics, after the Dolls House book, she doesn’t appear again (unless she turns up in the Wake since I haven’t read that far ahead), but by making her Lyta’s companion in the show, we know she will appear again since Lyta and the baby (Daniel not that he has been named yet in the show) are reoccuring characters throughout the entire Sandman comic run.

Maybe I just crave more lesbian and bisexual women rep in my fave shows, but sitting here watching this show again it just tickles me that in the entirety of season 1, it is so easy to view practically every major female or female presenting character as queer. Joanna Constantine and Rachel, Judy and Bette, Lucifer and Mazikeen (bring on the make out scene in season 2!), Chantal and Zelda, and in my opinion, Rose Walker, Barbie, Lucienne, and Gault are all queer coded WLW.

(Lucienne and Gault is just a ship I love okay but you can’t deny there was some flirting in episode 10!)

It’s been such a crappy year for lesbian rep with lesbian shows getting cancelled left right and centre. I just think lesbians should therefore claim the Sandman as theirs. if nothing else, claim it out of spite. It’s a fantasy show with a pathetic wet cat emo boy as a main character who literally surrounds himself with lesbians, is probably in love with his best friend, and considers a slutty gay serial killer with teeth for eyes his greatest ever creation. It just seems to me like the kind of show that should appeal heavily to WLW okay! Plus there are more lesbians coming in season 2! Encourage your lesbian and bisexual friends to go watch The Sandman now!

#The Sandman #rose walker #lgbtq #queer coding #queer coding in the sandman #please talk to me about this show #i love it and i really wanna talk about it now #even the non queer characters are queer #the angry straights were right when they said every character in the show is gay #even the non gay characters are gay #its the gay fantasy show to go with the gay pirate and vampire shows #my stuff

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melrosing · 1 year

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do you think jaime still joins the kg for cersei in the joanna lives au? or do you think he would’ve been betrothed or married already?

nahhh definitely not. I think if the twins were split up as children they would've grown out of the physical relationship pretty quickly. like all this 'one soul in two bodies' stuff was applied in hindsight, they weren't citing this to one another as toddlers. it was a weird thing they did because they didn't understand what they were doing or whether they should be doing it, and I think with a real stop put to it early on, both twins would independently figure that that was actually a bit fucked wasn't it lol, and honestly I imagine it would be pretty awkward between them next they met as older children. like yikes

so Jaime doesn't do anything like that for Cersei because he's come to understand himself as a separate being from his sister (or rather never came to understand himself as one with her), and probably just follows the trajectory that was first laid out for him. he's betrothed to Lysa, he inherits the Rock, etc.

I think what would be interesting in this AU would be that Jaime would be forced early on to properly confront the dissonance between his own view of the world and his father's - like if he's directly inheriting the Lannister legacy and is in on his father's war rooms and whatever, he would be forced to reckon with what House Lannister is and what part he plays in it. I think the result would be that Jaime's story would be primarily about the friction in that father/son dynamic, and the strain of succession. whereas in canon Jaime has long exercised a level of remove from his role in House Lannister, and is only in AFFC really truly confronting what his family have done and what culpability he could have in all that.

also his marriage to Lysa would be shit. I think they'd try for the first year but Jaime wouldn't like Lysa and Lysa would be stung and confused by that, so she'd have an affair and he'd pretend not to notice and they'd maybe have one child but can hardly bear to try for another one. but as I say, I don't think Jaime would have it in him to, cough, carnally, desire Cersei by that point (and in any case she'd be in KL), so I think his love life is just empty in this au.

#ask #jaime lannister #asoiaf

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mermaidsirennikita · 1 year

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Which historical romance books would you recommend to someone who would like to get into the genre but doesn't know where to start? So far my preferred genre was fantasy romance but I think I exhausted it completely at this point so I'm looking for something new. I tried Bridgerton but I didn't like, so I would appreciate any other recommendation. Thank you in advance.

Hey! I am happy to offer some recs. Imo, the Bridgerton books are kinda dated and work for a very *specific* reader, so it's not surprising to me that it wouldn't work. We can find something!

Sarah MacLean is a great gateway--I read every single adult historical she had out when I was first getting back into them in the early pandemic days. She typically writes very strong heroines (not always in a "we do battle" way, but always in mind and heart) and heroes who are just.... like, honestly, MESSES. Guys who can kick ass and fuck hard but are actually, deep within their souls, simps. From her backlist, I'd recommend as entry points:

Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake. Her debut, and I recommend it because it's super compulsively readable and very beloved, with good reason. It's the story of a wallflower type who's like, "Jesus Christ, I am so tired of being this person" and sets out to break these nine "rules" and have adventures. She ends up enlisting this known Slut Man to help her (in exchange for helping introduce his long lost sister to society) and naturally, he is soon after her. I will say, MacLean's first series is the most ballroom that she gets? Her tastes are definitely a bit wilder, and they get so from this book. It's funny, it's sexy, it's a romp. My favorite series of hers is the Rules of Scoundrels series, which is about a group of friends who own a gambling club and like getting emotionally destroyed by their lovers. But since you read fantasy romance, I will also suggest...

Wicked and the Wallflower. This is the first in her Bareknuckle Bastards series, which has a very fantastical, fairy tale-like premise. Basically, this guy's wife gave birth to an illegitimate daughter. At the same time, he had three illegitimate sons born together. So--girl not his, sons his. But he claimed the girl was a son upon baptizing her, and decided he'd pick which son was worthy of being his heir in what was essentially an extended CHILD BATTLE ROYALE. Anyway, the books focus on the grown children years later--two of the sons have become rulers of the London Underworld, taking the girl with them. It's wild, it's fun, the stakes are high.

Lisa Kleypas is a classic writer of the genre. She tends to write very emotional books, often focusing on very competent heroes (except that time she didn't and everyone clapped). For her, I always recommend her most famous series--it's a great crowd pleaser.

The Wallflowers. Four friends who are striking out on the marriage mart agree that at all costs, they will help each other find husbands this season. I recommend reading these in order, but the two strongest entries are It Happened One Autumn (book 2, an enemies to lovers situation, he's uptight and she's wild) and Devil in Winter (villainous hero enters into a marriage of convenience with the shy girl, gets absolutely emotionally compromised because she's actually everything), which MUST be read in order for max enjoyment. All the books are good, though, and book 1 is a great start with this kind of indecent proposal angle.

Monica McCarty's Highland Guard series could work for ya! It's a medieval series that centers on this group of knights who do these kind of black ops missions for Robert the Bruce as he's trying to take the Scottish throne. There's a lot of history, battling, Secret Love Shit. The first book is The Chief, which centers on the leader, this cool and stern guy who ends up in an arranged marriage situation with this woman who wants to Know Him Emotionally. These books have tons of adventure.

The Uptown Girls by Joanna Shupe. This series focuses on three sisters of a prominent man in Gilded Age New York, all of whom get into various types of trouble, some of which does involve organized crime. Fun and scandalous~ with a bit of danger. Also, super sexy.

Elizabeth Hoyt's Maiden Lane series is a great one that takes place in Georgian England. Lots of working class characters, walking on the wild side, danger. I'd recommend starting with book 3 (Scandalous Desires) as a starter, as it centers on a river pirate who basically takes this widow woman into his lair~ (he's actually trying to keep her and his daughter, who she's been caring for, safe--but he has ulterior motives, obvi). These books are super hot and often quite daring. Some of my personal favorites.

I think these are some options you can sample and maybe find a match or several with--imo, finding your niche is important. Like, I know Julia Quinn often doesn't work for me because I prefer books that are a bit ... heavier? And definitely with more sex and passion, often with less focus on the marriage mart. With exceptions, clearly!

#romance novel blogging #book recs

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yr-obedt-cicero · 1 year

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“At age eighteen, sister Patsy already knew John more deeply than he would ever know or understand her. Such a brother inspired and represented her own patriotism. Though she had to remain “retired” in the French countryside, utterly remote from urban news and war involvement, in her imagination she could follow at John's elbow and bask in thinking about his exciting part in the transatlantic drama. When Martha wrote of “boldness” in the “glory of the Lord,” and her battles against “floods of conflict” and “seas of tribulation,” she was figuratively aligning her inner self with her own family hero. Consciously, of course, her combative instincts were directed inward, onto her own battleground—the soul and her emerging selfhood.”

— The Life and Times of Martha Laurens Ramsay, 1759-1811, by Joanna Bowen Gillespie · 2001

#amrev #american history #historical john laurens #john laurens #martha laurens ramsay #martha laurens #patsy laurens #laurens family #laurens siblings #history #quotes #cicero's history lessons

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anewnewcrest · 7 months

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From the Payne Family Simstagram

No matter what secular lies the world might tell you, well-socialized children do NOT need to meet people outside your family! Keep them away from non-believers at all costs! A church community is well and good, but it's enough that they see other children for Sunday services. The rest of the week, your children are enough for each other, and they don't need classes and sports and friends! The bond between siblings is so precious that no so-called "friendship" with people outside your family could ever come close to it, and your children need to be best friends as well as siblings. It is so lovely to see them spend all of their waking hours together, talking and laughing, learning and playing, and walking on their paths towards the Watcher together.

It is so important that they have siblings to keep each other accountable and on the straight and narrow! We encourage our children to be watchful and mind their siblings' souls, because they're their brothers' and sisters' keepers and need to make sure that their siblings don't jeopardize their eternal salvation. If one of them sins, they need to correct their siblings immediately, and if that is not enough to change the behavior, they need to tell mom and dad. To that end, our children are never without chaperones, because sin festers in quiet alone time, and accountability is so important! Children get ideas when they're left alone, especially among non-believers!

The only exceptions are our two oldest boys, Aaron and Jason. Aaron is already twenty-one and working hard on his future career so he can have a family of his own one day, and after a childhood sheltered under his father's umbrella of authority, he's now ready to face the dangers of the secular world alone. Of course, we're worried about his choice of profession as a singer, but his faith is so strong that we can trust him even in high-sin environments like nightclubs, full of alcohol, drugs, dancing, and naked, tempting flesh. And Jason has been particularly strong in his faith from the time he was a child, so we allow him to go to a Watcher-centered private school so he can develop the gift of intelligence the Watcher has given him. So far, we have seen no adverse effects on his faith, but if we did, we would pull him out of school immediately! His eternal soul is of course more important than worldly things like an education!

Their sister Joanna is also strong in her faith and a wonderful example to her younger siblings, but of course we can't let her have the same freedoms as her brothers. The world is so much more dangerous for girls, and their purity of body and soul needs special protections. And Joanna is so busy training up to be a helpmeet that she doesn't have time to go out alone, anyway!

That evening, in a nearby nightclub...

#paynefamily #jacob and alyssa #aaron payne #joanna payne #nolan payne #a new newcrest #gen 2 #summer 3 #simblr #fundie sims #fundie simblr #fundie snark #sims 4 legacy #quiverfull sims

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triviareads · 10 months

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Can you recommend for me books with cheating? modern or historical romance?

lol trying to jog my memory on this one, as well as figuring out what constitutes cheating, and then looking up what others count as cheating was a fun time (standouts include a lot of whining by people on Goodreads about Dreaming of You, Prince of Dreams, and inexplicably The Recruit by Monica McCarty because apparently having sex with another woman while thinking about the heroine who has no ties to him whatsoever counts as cheating??).

The Evolution of Sin trilogy by Giana Darling: The most explicitly cheating book I can give you: Sinclair fully tells Giselle he has a girlfriend, and Giselle predictably gets a little huffy but in the most French way ever, he asks her very coolly if she's "going to be an adult about this" and then says his girlfriend is great but he wants Giselle anyway so... they go for it. Between this series and Giselle's sister Cosima's books, they really do the most for me.

Harvest of Sighs by Sierra Simone: Delphine does cheat on Rebecca with another Domme, and the following emotional journey for both of them was so moving to read, and also, I just love their non-linear path to reconciliation like, Bex fully sends Delphine a remote control vibrator that she's controlling...... while they're technically broken up lolol.

The Heiress Hunt by Joanna Shupe: The first time Lockwood is cucked (but not the laaaast), but this is the only time he's really cheated on since Maddie was officially engaged to him while she slept with Harrison.

Notorious Pleasures by Elizabeth Hoyt: The heroine, whose name is Hero, is engaged to the Griffin's brother, but cheats on him with Griffin. It's a great fire-meets-ice romance and it will never not be funny to me that their first meeting is when she walks in on him having sex with a married woman and gets all moralize-y about cheating being a stain on his soul or whatever.

Day of the Duchess by Sarah MacLean: Haven cheated on Sera before the events of the book and now she wants a divorce. The Rogue Not Taken more explicitly shows the cheating in the prologue, and the heroine of that book, Sera's sister, catches him and shoves him into a pond. Day of the Duchess is a book-long grovel on his part for that (and much more).

Waking Up With the Duke by Lorraine Heath: A very Lady Chatterley's Lover premise; Jayne's husband gave her permission to sleep with Ransom in order to get an heir buuuuut somewhere along the way she develops feelings which I think counts as emotional cheating. And I think Lorraine tried to mitigate that by writing the husband cheating on Jayne but 🤷🏻‍♀️

Eleven Scandals to Start to Win a Duke’s Heart by Sarah MacLean: Simon officially asks another woman to marry him during the course of the story, but still fucks around (with feelings) with Juliana. Not my favorite MacLean book (there are better starchy heroes out there), and I love that the woman who got cheated on, Penelope, got a fabulous romance of her own in A Rogue by Any Other Name.

#book recs #giana darling #sierra simone #sarah maclean #elizabeth hoyt #lorraine heath #joanna shupe #ask #historical romance #contemporary romance

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realmyths · 1 month

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RealMyths Plotting Cheat Sheet

Want new-and-exciting plots for your character? Long to reach out to more of your followers, but don’t know where to start? Fear not! Fill out this form and give your RP partners both present and future all the of juicy jumping off points they need to help you get your characters acquainted. Be sure to tag the players whose characters YOU want more cues to interact with, and repost, don’t reblog! Feel free to add or remove sections as you see fit. Template here.

Mun name: Star

OOC Contact: Ims, ask, discord (starwrites)

Who the heck is my muse anyway:

I'll do it for a few muses of mine

Farryn: That person who's always up for the craziest of adventures, and is also really chill. The literal personification of Adventure.

Ula/Meribella: A siren searching for her sister, Cascadia. Also found by the pool teaching her human job as a swimming instructor.

Cascadia/Christina: Ula's sister, also a siren. Fascinated by humanity. Often found at her job at a diner as a waitress.

Liz: The head witch in charge who is actually just a giant nerd. And also full of mischief.

Joanna: A private detective whose mother is missing.

Alanna: A creative soul at heart, a bestselling author and poet, currently working on a graphic novel. Also super gay.

Jayla: A teacher, always up for learning new things.

The [Redacted] Doctor: The mysterious yet caring time traveler. They are always up for an adventure and for helping those who need it. They need people more than they'll admit. Possibly their last incarnation, possibly not. They don't know. But they have a funny feeling.

Points of interest:

Ula/Meribella & Cascadia/Christina have shorter/no hair in the ocean. The longer they're on land, the more their hair grows. So Cascadia/Christina would have longer hair than Ula/Meribella.

Farryn: Obviously being the personification of Adventure means they're an immortal being so other supernatural/immortal beings could sense that about them.

Liz: Other beings with magic could sense that she is a witch.

What they’ve been up to recently:

Farryn: The usual, bartending in NYC and spreading adventure everywhere they go

Ula/Meribella: searching for her sister, Cascadia

Cascadia/Christina: Working at the diner and trying to learn more about humanity

Liz: V1: searching for the head witches and warlocks, working.

V2: Studying with online college courses, training with a head witch, working.

V3: helping her father at the pawn shop, spending time with her mother, and just practicing her magic.

Alanna: working on her graphic novel.

The Redacted Doctor: traveling time and space with their companion, Esfir.

Where to find them:

Farryn: can be anywhere and everywhere, but especially at their bar in NYC, at parties, anywhere an adventure is taking place

Cascadia/Christina: working at the diner

Liz: working at the restaurant, training with the head witch, the pawn shop in Storybrooke (V3 only),

Alanna: a book store

The Redacted Doctor: can be anywhere, but especially likely to find them in modern day London or the UK in general.

Desired interactions:

Honestly, I'm up for anything. All of my muses could use more friends, lovers, enemies, etc. For Ula/Meribella, maybe a thread where she finds Cascadia/Christina and the two sisters reunite? For Alanna, maybe a thread where someone recognizes her for her work and she is flattered by it.

Open to any and all interactions for all of my muses, though. These are just examples.

Offered interactions:

Farryn, Camille, and Lydia all throw parties, so perhaps a thread where they invite your muse to the party?

Cascadia/Christina: A thread where she's serving your muse at the diner. Or running into them outside of work and trying to subtly learn more about humanity (and possibly failing.)

Liz: I would love to have Liz interact with more magic users and supernatural beings of all kinds. Think that'd be interesting.

The [Redacted] Doctor : A thread where your muse travels with them for a trip? Maybe.

Current open post/s:

Opens/ memes

Anything else?:

For anything else, check my pinned post. I have my calls, my interest tracker, my promo, and rules/muses' info linked on there. <3

Tagged by @obscurushydrae

I tag: @bewitchingbaker, @flownintothesun, @mostmagicals and YOU if you want to do this! <3

#sometimes i see so much beauty i dont think that i can cope (out of character.)#ooc #(ooc.)#(out of character.)#(plotting cheat sheet.)#(mun: dash games.)#(dash games.)

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eclipsecrowned · 6 months

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‘ i would rather die because i betrayed them than live because i betrayed you ’ (jaime @ joanna) // @dcviline

Where does it come from, this unerring loyalty, this head rightly twined into socket? It's a cold breeze blowing over her soul, reckoning where golden blood gave way to red-blooded sentiment. How did Tywin's son reckon family the superior of a name?

Her beautiful boy. Her foolish first son. Her avenger.

Years spent praying for a champion, for broader hands than her own that could wield a sword without tiring, and here he stands. It is too late to make it right for her, blood could never wash out the indignity -- But it pleases her all the same. Gods, it pleases her.

Those small, marble hands now rest against his face, her hold like iron. "They cannot have you," she says, tone gilded with sureness. "There will be no blade raised to you that can prosper, Jaime. You know that. And if those Winter Wolves come baying for honor and justice, ask them what they intended to do with the wretched bastard when they bound him in iron--"

Damn them. Damn them all. Why waste so much blood over one foolish girl? Was the coming generation so weak that they could not endure the least of what hers had known? Fire dances behind her eyes, white-hot, and it is only some deep well of self-control that keeps her teeth hidden. Why should Aerys pay for the sins of the son?

He had his own to answer for. Her Jaime had made it so. The heat rolls out of her in a long sigh, Joanna's hands dropping lest he feel the tremble in them. No. There was no blaming Jaime for doing what must be done. It doesn't matter why it came to pass, only that it was done. He is more a man in her eyes than even his father.

Deftly, she overlooks evidence to the contrary, the softness of a face that still so favors his sister, the growing he still must do to measure up to his peers. Becoming is a bloody business. He's far too old for her to wish it had been easier for him.

Perhaps she was never a worthy enough mother to pray an easier path for her children. Perhaps she was damned too young to dream of better paths.

"You will not die, Jaime," she says at last. "It would be a waste of your bravery. We have won. Slain the dragon and scattered its seed. The Baratheon boy is a fool, but you conducted yourself..." Poorly. It galls her not to sit where another had, to take from one Queen who had given her nothing besides. And yes, part of her aches to crown her own son, to give the realm the promise of a golden warrior over a moon-pale singer.

"...Adequately. It will be easy to cow him, between your father and I." It is easier to say these things now, to speak of quiet defiance and molten grasp hidden beneath velvet gloves. He has slain a King. What must loyalty mean to him now, besides his own admission of Mother, Mother, Mother?

His Mother is no font of mercy.

She smiles like one though, a soft, tender expression modeled on a Sept's effigy. "Though that is for Tywin and I to discuss. We... Should be talking about you." You, who will not bow to a Stag, trying not to trip over the wires that your parents stitch into him. You, the best of all sons.

#dcviline #joannatbt #long post //#haha u want some survival au and the aftermath of jaime's no good horrible awful very bad day? :)#THIS SO GOT AWAY FROM ME.

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yxxxxxx1 · 2 years

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Thread about Joanna of Castile: Part 1: Her Education

… any woman born with a great gift in the sixteenth century would certainly have gone crazed, shot herself, or ended her days in some lonely cottage outside the village, half witch, half wizard, feared and mocked at. —Virginia Wolf, A Room of One's Own

Diverse thoughts flood one's mind upon hearing the name Juana of Castile, or as some may recognize her: Juana la Loca. Countless historians have debated her story. Was she truly insane? Did she battle with a mental disorder? Or was she tragically victimized by the very men she held dear? In my forthcoming posts, I delve into Juana's life, drawing from historical sources. I will write about Joanna's life based on historical sources in my upcoming posts. Enjoy the readings, everyone.

Juana was born in Toledo on November 6, 1479. She grew into a lively, pretty, and graceful little girl who was to develop into a beautiful woman. Juana had a regal and dignified presence, befitting her royal lineage as a member of the powerful Spanish Habsburg dynasty. She was, the Venetian ambassador would write, “very handsome”. According to other authors, she had auburn hair and a fair complexion. Her nose was long and straight, her blue eyes were large, deep, and soulful, her mouth was an almost perfect cupid's bow, her lips were full, her fingers slim and delicate.

Other sources wrote that she was known for her fair complexion, typical of the European nobility during that era. Her face was oval-shaped, with a high forehead, delicately arched eyebrows, and a well-defined jawline. Juana had large, expressive eyes that were often described as melancholic or sorrowful. They were of a deep colour, commonly portrayed as dark brown or hazel. Her eyes were said to possess a certain intensity, reflecting her emotional state and the turmoil she faced throughout her life.

In terms of attire, Juana would have dressed according to the fashion of her time and status as a queen. She wore elegant gowns made from luxurious fabrics, often adorned with intricate embroidery, jewels, and furs. The style of her clothing would have followed the trends of the Spanish court during the late 15th and early 16th centuries.

When Juana was seven, her parents appointed Andres de Miranda as her first tutor. It was his task to teach her Latin, a language in which she became proficient, and Catholic doctrine—essential skills that Deza also taught to Juan, her brother. She was taught to ride, she was taught music and dancing, she learned how to behave in public. And, just like her mother, Juana learned housewifely tasks like baking, spinning, weaving, and sewing.

Ever mindful of her experiences, the queen was determined to give her girls the best start available, and by the standards of her time, she did. Her daughters were not the only educated noble women among the European aristocracy, but they were certainly better educated than most women of their era. There was one omission, though: the study of foreign languages, surely useful for girls destined to marry foreign princes, was largely neglected.

Sources: Fleming, G. B. (2018). Juana I: Legitimacy and Conflict in Sixteenth-Century Castile (1st ed. 2018 edition). Palgrave Macmillan.

Fox, J. (2012). Sister Queens: The Noble, Tragic Lives of Katherine of Aragon and Juana, Queen of Castile. Ballantine Books.

Gómez, M. A., Juan-Navarro, S., & Zatlin, P. (2008). Juana of Castile: History and Myth of the Mad Queen. Associated University Presse.

#joanna of castile #juana i of castile #Johanna I von Kastilien #Juana I de Castilla #Johanna van Castilie #Isabella I of Castile #european history

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cainiine · 5 months

Text

( about. )

FULL NAME: ▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ ▆▆▆▆▆▆.

ALIAS: Joanna Doe.

GENDER II SPECIES: Female II Hellhound.

BIRTHDAY II AGE II AGE STATED: 21.05.▆▆▆▆ II ▆▆ II 26.

BIRTHPLACE: USA, Illinois, Springfield.

HEIGHT: 5’9”.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bisexual.

OCCUPATION: Security guard.

(MIS)DEMEANOUR: Your logical understanding of the human behaviour is almost impeccable; emotions are fascinating and the reasons for actions are easy to comprehend, as complex as they might be. If only you could adapt this knowledge to yourself. You are merely a caricature of a human and the longer others spend time with you, the weirder you become. An uncanny valley version of normalcy. You are intense, politely blunt but easy to get along with on a surface level. Rutheless with a sadisitic tinge you can only hide so well. Yet when others become suspicious of you, you know exactly what to say and try not to smile to widely to ease their worries. You wouldn’t want them to see the remnants of the soul you have just eaten between your teeth. –> Traits: seems friendly. generally apathetic of other’s plights. has a weakness for genuinely good and kind people, as well as her family. feeds mostly off of fear and hopelessness and guilt.

FACE CLAIM: Emmy Rossum.

FULL NAME: ▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ ▆▆▆▆▆▆.

ALIAS: Johnny Doe. Scarecrow.

GENDER II SPECIES: Male II Hellhound.

BIRTHDAY II AGE II AGE STATED: 21.05.▆▆▆▆ II ▆▆ II 26.

BIRTHPLACE: America, Illinois, Springfield II RAISED IN: America, Texas, Dallas.

HEIGHT: 5’9”.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bisexual.

CURRENT OCCUPATION: Mechanic.

A BARK & A BITE: You do not like being seen. Which, in itself, is a hypocritical thing to claim because it is your anger that turns heads in shock and your black and blue and bloodied fists that ellicit countless gasps. Your anger and aggression are stronger than you, your primal nature that reveals you but you don’t like their lingering gazes and the possibility of being remembered. But you’re slightly more human than your sister: you cloud yourself in your Southern charm and drawl an excuse for your actions, a friendliness that is not fake but actually part of you. Fear of you changes into understanding smiles and now they are left wondering why they even looked at you in the first place. If they try to recall you, they have no face to remember but only a lingering feeling of dread they will ignore. –> Traits: aggressive, cunning, charming, suspicous. weakness for underdogs. feeds mostly off of fear and anger and guilt.

FACE CLAIM: Alex Turner.

WE WHO DO NOT DWELL ON THE PAST: You have both shed your past selves like a serpent has shed its useless skin: you’re not human anymore, not bound to the experiences, emotions and relations you once carried on your back. The construct of family does not apply anymore, it’s only you two and the flickering, shadowy shape of a father that appeared in your room when you were only ▆▆ years old. He reunited you both then - you were seperated at birth, one twin stolen by a hunter to keep him from the claws of Abaddon - and since then, you have been his guard dogs: you hunt for souls who sold themselves to him and whose time is due and nothing can stop you both from dragging them to hell. You are Cerberus unleashed onto the earth and you hunger for the blood of the sinners and the feathers of the saints. Nothing stops you from doing what you are meant to do: tear out souls from the breast of man. But your human background can make you weak and you have a tendency to form relationships, enjoy others’ company as distrustful as you might be.

#( hell's cowboy. );; about: johnny.#( soul sister. );; about: joanna.

0 notes

anatomicalmartyr · 1 year

Text

tagged by @thelovelygods (thank you angel! Just what I needed to today❤️)

nickname: The Historian by a teacher. My mom also has some but they belong to her ❤️

sign: aquarius

height: about 5′2

last thing i googled: Padmini

song stuck in my head: I am in love with the first 46 second of this

number of followers: 936!

amount of sleep: ca. 8-9 hours on average, 2-5 if I’m stressed out about something happening the next day

lucky number: lucky? I don’t know him

dream job: I have always liked the thought of working in a library or museum

wearing: winter pyjamas and a bathrobe

movies/books that summarize me: hmmm... as for books:

Metamorphoses - Ovid

The Tale of Genji - Murasaki Shikibu

The Pillow Book - Sei Shōnagon

The Master and Margarita - Mikhail Bulgakov

The Anatomical Venus: Wax, God, Death & the Ecstatic - Joanna Ebenstein

Swamp Foetus - Poppy Z Brite

Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte

Dracula's Guest: A Connoisseur's Collection of Victorian Vampire Stories

Dark Water - Koji Suzuki

The Nightingale and the Rose - Oscar Wilde

Balyet - Patricia Wrightson

Also most importantly depressing scandinavian children’s book, but makes for a whole list in it’s own right...

movies:

Possession, 1981

Viy, 1967

Ivan the Terrible: Part 2, 1946

Kwaidan, 1964

Panna a Netvor, 1979

The Story of Adele H, 1975

Nosferatu (1922 and 1979 version)

The Prince of Egypt, 1998

All In The Dim Cold Night, 1974

La Reine Margot, 1994

Ringu, 1998

favorite song: so many to pick from... so I’m gonna narrow it down to my top 5 from this year (in no particular order): Pyar Kiya To Darna Kya, Kom Nirk Oun Eiy, If I Were DESIRE, The Billowing Yangtze River Flows East (ROTk 1994 has too many great songs oof)

(And of course, almost everything by Kate Bush)

favorite instrument: probably the flute or the violin, it hits something deep and ancient in my soul

aesthetic: completely comfy and casual at home, according to my mom and sisters, a “cool” but “elegant” look when outside. Almost always in black

favorite author: Astrid Lindgren

favorite animal noise: the noises a dog makes when they’re happy to see you, almost everything that comes out of a cat

random: I am quite entranced with Kuchipudi and Bharatanatyam dance, so expect more of that on this tumblr in the very near future!

tagging @pierangelis, @karolinaceska, @dorianwrites, @streamlet, @stoertebeker, @death-of-venus, @iseute @moramaisis (and anyone else who is interested!)

#sorry if I forgot to tag anyone I'm a bit sleep deprived ha...#asks #about me #me #literature #film #music

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hcrexcellency · 8 months

Note

Joanna -> Mars, Uranus

MARS

is your muse subtle when it comes to things they want ?

Not even in the slightest. If she shows any kind of discretion about anything that goes on inside her head, it's probably because she is still making decisions. But once she knows exactly what she wants, she pursues it relentlessly.

are they passionate about the things they do, so much so it could come off as aggressive ? perhaps obsessive ?

It is not secret throughout all of Europe, by now, that Joanna's soul is bathed in fire and passion. Aggression ( though she would call it pride ) is the hallmark of what makes her so memorable ( either for good or bad reasons ). She would not call it obsession, though many others would.

what gives your muse passion ? what makes them competitive, what gives them courage ? how do they express these, by words ? actions ?

Independence and adventure gives her passion. Anything that breaks the rules and allows her to feel more free to make choices solely on her own merit and not because of what law and duty say, those are the things that really give her passion and drive. Anyone who tries to outshine or snuff out her fire makes her competitive. She has a natural courage about her, something she's always had since she was a little girl. She is the most expressive of her passions, how she chooses to express them depends on the moment.

what is your muses sexual energy like ? are they a sexual person ?

Undoubtedly, yes. Her sexual energy is not unlike her true nature; ferocious and raw, yet tenacious and passionate. Tapping into that is one of the easiest ways to rebel, as it gives her the perfect excuse to give in to this type of vice. There is also something so sinfully sweet about being primally desired, a want that is free of thought and process, that simply just is. Especially when it's from someone she cares deeply for, she can become addicted to that mutual desire.

URANUS

this particular planet is the planet of sudden inspiration and change, so how does your muse handle unpredictable changes ? how do they handle planned and known changes ?

Quite chaotically, actually. This is why even her own sisters tend to keep secrets from her, because there's no telling what kind of strife her reactions could cause. When it comes to planned changes, she throws a bit of a temper tantrum at first, but she will eventually settle with enough time to process and adjust.

what about inspiration ? do they do whatever inspires them in that moment, or is their inspiration something that takes time to develop and build ?

She heavily motivated and inspired by the same things; influence, attention, love, or greed. She can always pick herself back up off the ground for at least one of those four things.

what makes your muse special ? what makes them different and eccentric, if they are ? where do they create the most change ?

Joanna is special for somehow being likable despite her intense pride and stubbornness. When she hand-picks which people she'd like to keep, she is the most loyal friend and will even commit crimes for those she especially cares deeply about. She would fight for anyone on their behalf and defend them until the end of time. What she does, she does with honor and truth, even if it comes off terrifying and/or annoying.

#muse ; 𝐉𝐨𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐫t #memes ; 𝐉𝐨𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐭

0 notes

nityarawal · 9 months

Text

P.2 Yesterday's Boytoy

Yeah If I'd Been A

Lesbian

If You Were Going

To Sodomize Me

It Would've Been

With One Of Them

Above

And Whose

Dyke Judge

Suffocated Thee

Wanted Our

Who-Who's

On A Plea

Joanna Bond

Marshall Arts Goddess

Courtesan

Singing

Mama's Song

Is She Still Alive

Marissa

"Siane"

Morris

Prettiest Girls

Actresses Divine

Mamma

Are My Sisters

Still Alive

What Came Of Their

Babies

We Know You Didn't

Like When Your

Lawyers

Clients

Exploited

Ukrainian Women

For Twin Girls

Are Their Cherries

Still There

For He Has Far

Too Much Time

Diaper Changing

Alone

Unchaperoned

By Adult Women

Mothers

Like Ivanka's

Husband

Who Caged Her

For His Sins

She Just

Blimped Out

On Drugs

Rotted Teeth Out

In Hospitals

For Telling

The Truth

We Were Shocked

She Eventually

Went Back To

Him

Took Plea Bargain

Oh How She Sang

Your Song Paul

Soul Searched

So Nice

How She Sang

"Let It Be,"

About The Blessed

Virgin

Your Mommy

In A Dream

Divine

Your Mother

Oh How She Sang

Paul

While We Waited

For You To Release

But How She

Worried

About Her Daughter

Only 2.5

Calling

"Come Home Mamma!"

She Missed

Her Mamma

"Come Home

Mamma!"

The Toddler Begged

For Safety

Sometimes

You Know

Mamma's

Always There

Even If She Seems

Dead

Like Princess Mitra

Or Me

Estranged For Years

From Our Beloved

Children

Mammas Always There

You Know That Paul

Mammas Always There

And She Gave You

The Best Song

You've Ever Sung

Mammas'

Always There

"Let It Be,"

"I Will,"

Maybe Two Songs

Maybe Three

Maybe Infinity

Maybe They're All

From Her

Mothers Psyche

Mamma's Always

There

Queen's Too

For You

Curtsies

Knighted

For True Knight Hood

Mammas

Always There

And Their Knights

Who Will Sing For

Honey Drops

Of Nectar

In Our Hearts

Building

For You Dear

Kings

Trinity

Gracious

Gratzia

Thanksgiving

Commissions

Now Please

For The Bird

Demise

By X

And Hackers

Cyber Security

Threats

Bots Bombed

Atty Refunds

Princess Dorms

Full

At Las Colinas

Detention

Karma Center

Of Law Enforcement

Dykes

Now

Beards

Not Trafficked

Good Moms

Like Carla Riverra

Native Princess

Worth Millions

In Probate Courts

Even Though

She Hasn't Died Of Leukemia

Yet

And Aften Bearman

Brain Cancer Victim

Irish Catholic

Princess

Mommy To Jewish

Mulatto Kids

In Covid

Caged

Pregnant

Mahalo

My Lord

Do Your Jobs

And We'll Thank You

For X

Is Meant

To Tombstone

Our Birds

Sacred Freedom

At Last

So Writers

Can Sing

Uninhibited

Please

Peace,

Nitya Nella Davigo Azam Moezzi Huntley Rawal

0 notes

suchsweetsorro · 2 years

Text

in the midst of college apps/auditions, theatre rehearsals and drifting in and out of friend groups, i have a couple of characters i’ve thought a lot about but havent gotten to play >:( so now im gonna scream them into the goth rave tumblr void

so first we have delphine (no, i did not realize where i had heard that name before until after i made her and fell in love with the name): shes a little gay frankenstein swarmkeeper ranger. basically she was a noble put in an arranged marriage with a woman she actually liked (but was obsessed w/ necromancy, human experimentation and alchemy. gaslight gatekeep girlboss ig). her memory is a little spotty for reasons we get to later, but she gets these floral tattoos all up her arm. oops, at some point she dies (doesn’t know why), and her wife is in grief and panic and tries to bring her back however she can, so she ends up fusing her with other people (a la frankenstein), to try and bring her back. shes successful (but these weird butterflies/moth tattoos somehow show up on delphine’s arms, she has no idea why), but delphine is afraid of her and who shes become, so she runs off and wanders the woods... i love her sm... and her swarmkeeper swarm is those tattoos that come off of her arms like 2d butterflies

and next we have my future (hopefully) Curse of Strahd gal (Name TBD). basically her mom and sister (other pc) left when she was very young (off to the soultryce academy, where everything will go just great!!). eventually, BOOM, she turns into a tiefling (she doesnt know why, but her sister made a deal w/ a devil/demon and became an aasimar)! she kinda becomes a private eye/fence, occasionally working with the cobalt soul and doing some private investigation stuff, tho she occasionally loses control bc there’s some devilish control over her... (rogue/barbarian multiclass). shes just a gay fem sherlock whose into supernatural stuff. so joanna constantine...

#dnd rant #oc #swamkeeper #your honor i love them #dnd oc

0 notes

lengthofropes · 3 years

Text

POVs series

Part 3: Jack

(Part 1: Cas is here) (Part 2: Sam is here) - can be read as separate stories

———-

words: 5,4k | smr: Jack’s POV as Cas returned from the Empty / Heaven rebuilt | read on A03

rating: general | warnings: none

———-

This is my little contribution for dadstiel week <3

———-

“Any thoughts?” I ask.

Castiel looks around. The room is empty. Light within the white walls and ceiling is flashing every few seconds. Heaven looks like abandoned office building after significant staff cuts.

“It’s so quiet here” he says. He looks despondent. “This place was so full of power and light. My brothers and sisters… If I knew it all will end this way…”

I come closer and touch him by the arm. This must be hard for him, I understand, but this is why we are here - to fix. This is why I asked for his help, who else can be a better adviser?

“This is not the end, don’t say it. We are here to make a new start”

He looks at me, and slowly his face eases from pain and regret. I know, he believes in me. Like always.

“Will you help me? I can’t make it without you”

He smiles, finally. It’s a warm smile, full of gratitude and love.

I made a right decision, now I’m sure, he is glad to help. But after all, he’s the one who taught me, that it makes you feel so much better, if you’ve got the opportunity to make things right.

“Sure, Jack” he nods. Then adds, quietly “Thank you…”

I smile back at him, I can’t hold it. This is going to be great! Energy fills me. We always have so much fun, working together, it feels encouraging to have him near. No matching ties this time, but it’s okay.

It’s good that time flows differently here. We got so much work to do… and when I will bring him back on Earth, it’s gonna be just a couple of days, I guess? At least I hope I won’t take us longer, I’m not sure I can handle another conversation with grumpy Dean. It’s hard to keep a straight face, when he’s like this. Yeah, I understand he’s worried and he doesn’t want to let Castiel out of his sight, but he’s gonna be with me. With ME, Dean! I need my father’s help with something, can I spend some time with him, too?

I’ve waited enough time for Castiel to feel better again. Until he’s strong enough after coming back from the Empty. All is well now.

All is good.

“Alright!” I clap my hands. “Where do we start?”

***

We walk empty corridors, discussing our strategy.

“Angels were supposed to be guardians, shepherds.” Castiel says. He’s calm and thoughtful. “We were born to protect our father’s creations. We are soldiers on guard of peace and prosperity. Not the blunt instruments of war.”

“I guess you are the only one who understands it right” I nod.

He is. He was bullied so often for having too much heart, it’s ridiculous. By the creatures, spoiled with pride, lust for power and profit. Where are they now?

“You’re too kind” he smiles humbly.

“I am the way I am, thanks to you. Thanks to our family.” It’s a simple truth, and we both know it. His smile grows, and he puts a hand on my shoulder.

The light is flickering again, but much more intense this time, walls are shaking.

“It’s getting worse…” There’s concern in Castiel’s voice. “I am amazed this place is still holding on.”

“Yeah. Not enough angelic power. I remember Dumah tried to make me create angels beings by forging human souls, to return Heaven it’s might.”

Castiel rolls his eyes, definitely not the best one of his memories. But hey, not my fault, anyway. Besides…

“They all are dead now. It was a bad idea.”

“Any manipulation with human soul is a bad idea. What was she thinking?” He seems to be still angry about that. And I fully support him, but the question stands.

“I don’t think we can rebuild it in any other way. Heaven needs angels, they are the essential source of it’s power.”

Shaking has stopped, the light is dim, but at least it doesn’t flicker anymore.

“I know”, Castiel agrees with heavy exhale. “How many are left there? Nine? Ten?”

“Eight” I purse my lips. “Seven up here, including Naomi, who’s still in jail”

“Still?”

“Yeah. Seems like no one likes her…”

“I can’t blame them” Castiel deadpans, and it makes me laugh.

“And Anael, she’s still on Earth”

“Oh, the famous businesswoman”

“Yeah.”

He gives me the look.

“Should we… talk to her?” I don’t want to, but I have to ask anyway.

“We should” he says unenthusiastically. “But…”

“Not now?”

“Not now” he agrees, squinting his eyes.

“Later”

“In the last place”

“When she will rethink her life choices”

“Absolutely” he nods again, dead serious.

I crack first and he follows immediately, it’s good to hear his laugh.

We keep snickering, passing the heaven rooms. Number 257, number 259… This corridor seems endless.

“You know,” I start. “When I first got here, I thought it looks more like a prison. Or! Like an aquarium for a goldfish!”

“Small tank for a single soul?” Castiel raises his eyebrow.

“Yeah! And people here are like a fish. You know, goldfish has a 3 seconds memory? It forgets everything, before it starts another round in it’s tank”

“Like people here, captured in never-ending loops of their best memories…” he continues my thought, musingly tilting his head. “Yes, exactly.”

“And they are happy. Mom looked happy, I think…”

“You’re not sure?”

“Would you be happy on your own forever? Even in your best memory?”

“They don’t feel like they are on their own, they exist within a moment of eternal peace.” He shakes his head. “But I got your point. They don’t have a freedom of choice, they don’t know it’s a loop. Goldfish souls…”

I stop. He looks at me, and I see the question rises in his eyes, along with the hope for the answer.

“Can we…”

“..give them the choice?”

We look at each other, knocked out with the idea itself.

“Jack… this… this is wonderful!”

“You think? This will make them happy? I mean, happy for real?”

“You know what…” his face is focused, he tries to remember something. “Actually, we can ask. Dean once told me about one friend of theirs. I don’t know him in person, he died before I met Winchesters. But he’s here, he broke the loop, and figured the way to travel between individual heavens.”

“Oh, I know! Ash!”

“Right... “He seems a little confused. “I have to get used to it. You know everything now. Of course, you know everything...”

***

Sure, we didn't break in right inside, we knocked on the door politely. Jo (I know, it’s her, she’s very nice!) opens the door.

“Cas??” She’s amazed, but her smile is so genuine, I like it.

“Hi, Jo” Castiel is surprised too, but he takes her attack hug very well.

“Mom!” She yells. “Mom, look who’s here!!!”

“Joanna Beth, quit yelling, for God’s sake!”

We enter the bar and see Jo’s mother. I never thought someone’s heaven can be an old bar, all smelled with beer and peanuts, but here we are. And I like the smell, actually. It fits very well.

“Castiel? Well, I’ll be damned!” She puts down the glass and walks out from behind the bar counter. “Come here, you feather ass!”

She squeezes him tight, but he’s okay with it, he looks very happy.

“Who’s the kid?” She nods in my direction.

“Hi, I’m Jack!” I smile and raise my bunch of fives in greeting.

“Yes, this is.. this is Jack. He is..”

“I’m new God”

“You’re… who?”

“…he’s WHAT?”

“It’s a long story.” Castiel purses his lips, as he alternately looks at Joe, then at Ellen. Their eyes are wide, but it makes them no less brave.

“Then sit and talk, we have all the time in the world here. And are we yearned for the news, you know.” Ellen beckons us to the counter with a nod.

“Sure” Castiel agrees. “But where’s Ash? We thought we’re gonna see him here, isn’t it his heaven?”

“It is” Jo sits on the stool. “Our looked exactly the same. And when he found us, we kinda decided to move. He got all his stuff here, and it’s easier to travel from this starting point.”

“So you travel between heavens too?” Cas asks.

“Yeah, but not so much as he does. It’s better to have such opportunity, then to be locked, anyway. I mean, we don’t complain, but…”

“We were shocked when we saw him first. But then he explained. A lot of things, actually, about how everything works here.” Ellen continues, putting four glasses of beer in front of us. She looks at me suspiciously. “How old are you, exactly?”

“Oh, I’m three”

Her eyebrows are high again, but Castiel just shakes his head.

“He can drink, Ellen. That’s okay”

“Oh yeah? And who are you, his dad?”

“He is!” I confirm. “Well, actually, my father is Lucifer, but Castiel raised me. Castiel, Dean and Sam”

Jo chokes on her beer and Castiel pats her back gently.

“I guess I have to explain a lot of things, too” he apologises.

“Please, give us a favour… And I think we’re gonna need something stronger here…” Ellen takes a bottle of tequila from the shelf. “Don’t worry, no hangover here”

Door slams loudly.

“Whooo! Look who’s back, ladies! I gotta say, Cliff Burton is a really nice dude in person. He…” A man in colorful mask and a gold cape runs inside the bar.

“Oh..” He freezes, looking at us. “A company?”

“Ash, this is Castiel and Jack. Guys…” Ellen smiles to us. “This is Ash”

***

I wander around the bar, eating salted peanuts. Really tasty, I like it. So many cool pictures on the walls, the pool table, music box. I think this place is awesome! Castiel continues his story, he’s somewhere near to the mark of Cain. Guys sit around and listen with genuine interest, I’ve lost count how many glasses they’ve had already. They cried a lot, they laughed, too. Of course. This is the most amazing story ever!

“So, we’re here with Jack to make Heaven a better place” Castiel finishes. “And we wanted to ask you about the travels between individual spots. Are you the only one who’s capable of that?” He looks at Ash.

“Well, I guess I am” He sounds so proud of himself, trying to hold back the burp. “I’ve never seen anyone else doing it, only me and my friends”

“And you can travel anywhere?”

“Mostly” he scratches behind his ear. “Some places cannot be located with my scanner. It’s not powerful enough, I assume”

“We can’t find dad” Jo interrupts. She looks sad. “We don’t know why. We even thought, that maybe… maybe he’s not here”

“Bill Harvelle is in Heaven, as far as I know” Castiel sounds concerned, looking at me.

“He is” I nod in confirmation.

“Well,” Ellen smiles bitterly. “Good to know”

We are silent. Suddenly Heaven is not a happy place at all.

“You know what’s weird?” She says. “We didn’t even think of him. I mean… We remembered him, sure. But we… Dammit, it’s so hard to explain! We were like in a bubble, before Ash came. A happy bubble, no regrets, no worries…”

“No thoughts. Just bliss. Perfect loop” Castiel follows.

“Totally” Jo agrees. “You know, all your life you believe, you’re gonna meet your loved ones here, someone you miss the most. And then it turns out you’re just being canned in a piece of your happy memory. And no one complains, because no one… acknowledges.”

“The more I listen, the more I am convinced that this place was created without the slightest consideration of the real needs of the human soul” Castiel sounds bitter, utterly disappointed.

“Because no one cared to listen” I’m sad too.

I know what my happiest memories are, they all are full with the people I love. Jo is right. Leaving people blindfolded is not an option, they deserve so much better.

“Well,” Castiel stands up from the stool.” Now we know, what our priorities are.”

“Looks like a lotta work, you guys need some assistance?” Ash drums his finders on his glass.

“Thanks Ash. We’re not sure yet, but if we will, we know where to find you.”

“You’re cool, and I like your hair very much!” I add.

Compliment makes Ash fidget in his chair, but he is pleased.

“Thanks! You both look cool too” he raises his eyebrows approvingly.

“Yeah, by the way” Jo bumps Castiel’s shoulder with her fist. “So unusual without your trench coat, much better now. Love the T-shirt!”

“Uh, yeah… thanks,” Castiel awkwardly fiddles with the zipper on his hoodie, I think his cheeks blush?

“Wait…is this… Dean’s?” Jo squints her eyes examining familiar print.

“Yeah, I umm… haven’t got a chance to buy a new clothes yet.” No doubt. He’s blushing. “So Dean just… um.. borrowed me some of his old.” He deliberately takes a gulp from his glass to cover his sudden shyness. I don’t understand why to be shy about this, but it’s none of my business. Harvelles quit their interrogation too.

“Now, where to next?” Castiel ask, as we walk out of the bar. He tries to fix his hair after particularly heartful goodbye hugs they gave him.

“Luchbreak?”

***

We sit on a roof of Chrysler building. It’s a room 566297335, this guy’s best memory is finally getting a promotion and moving to the bigger office with a spectacular view. All people are so different…

“So,” my mouth is a little too full with burger, but I’m too excited to chew slower. “Travels between the personal rooms?”

Castiel sips his coffee thoughtfully, his gaze is fixed on the horizon.

“Yes,” he nods carefully. “This concept is inspiring.”

He’s quiet for the moment. Fake New York is silent around us, no buzzing cars, no human voices, no wind. Still, it’s a beautiful decoration, never-ending spring sunset, coloring the streets with warm and soft orange palette.

“Among the many things I’ve seen for the past years being on Earth, purity of human soul enraptures me the most. It’s vulnerability and integrity. People are so fragile, so defenceless. Life is ruled by their emotions and feelings, and they live it in the eternal search for a soul that will make their own feel accepted as it is. And this... This is the most beautiful thing.” He looks at me, endless warmth and placidity in his eyes.

“You think, we really understand it? Human soul? You and I?”

He smiles.

“I don’t think it’s something that can be understood completely. I doubt that a person is able to understand their soul, not to mention the soul of another human being. But we can listen attentively.” He looks at me. “The least we can do, is be kind and do not confine anyone's freedom. We had a good teachers.”

“Yes… No more cells” I nod affirmatively.

“No more cells” Castiel agrees.

***

We’re in the white room, a map of old Heaven lays on the table and we keep studying it. Castiel rubs his eyes constantly.

“You know what, it’s too old school on paper, let me make a 3d hologram…” I click my fingers and it’s done. ”Better?”

Castiel blinks few times and comes closer to observe.

“Yes, way better! Thank you, Jack” he puts his hand on my shoulder, smiling at the new workspace.

“It’s still so… flat” He adds.

Indeed, Heaven looks like endless paper sheet, ripped out of squared notebook.

“Yeah…” I’m not impressed too. “I’ve always thought Heaven is much cooler place.”

“We should work on a structure” Castiel mumbles. “Now it’s just enormous amount of cells, each decorated in it’s own style. And if we want them to be connectable…”

“Maybe we should remove the walls entirely? Like, make one big space?”

Castiel blinks.

“We- can we do it?”

“Sure! We can make it look like anything we want. Like a Disneyland. Or a Death Star!

“I don’t think Death Star is acceptable reference here” Castiel tries to hold back his smile.

“Coruscant?” I may be overly enthusiastic over this idea, but why not?

“No.” He’s very gentle, but I got his point.

“Endor?” This is my last try, I promise.

“I was thinking maybe… Earth?”

“Oh!”

“Basically, we already have different parts here, from all the ages and territories. So, maybe we…”

“Yes! Combine them together!” This is so simple, I love it!

Cas is hesitant again, there’s a doubt on his face, forehead frowned.

“But won’t this cause a turmoil? The Earth has looked very different throughout it’s history. And each soul remembers it in it’s own way.”

“So? Time and space aren’t a thing here. We can create a collective image, a collective space. We won’t even have to make a large effort, people’s memories are our best designer. Our Heaven can consist of any number of layers. It already is! Remember Ash? He travels through Heavens from different countries and different eras. Nothing is impossible here”

“This.. this sounds so simple?” I can see, he slowly accepts the idea.

“Well, the concept is simple. But we definitely got a work to do.”

He smiles. Wide and inspired.

“It’s wonderful, Jack!”

“Yes. But the main question is, how many angels do we need to make it work?”

Castiel’s smile fade.

“Yes… Angels,” he exhales heavily.

“Cas..?”

He walks around the table and sits in the chair. He rubs his forehead, looking down on the floor, I cannot see his eyes.

“Castiel?” I come closer. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I just… I understand, you can create angels now. From a scratch, like Chuck… God… used to. This is what you’re going to do?”

“Yes.” I nod. “In fact, they are going to be my first children”

I’ve thought about it. Not that I’m terrified with the responsibility, not that I have doubts. This is just… something absolutely new. Not even like bringing the entire population of Earth back. The creation. Pure.

“And I’m going to give the living ones their wings back” I smile. I hope this will bring back my father’s good mood.

He smiles, but I know he still blames himself for the angel’s fall.

“This is great, Jack, this is wonderful!”

“But, you’re sad?”

He’s quiet again. I guess I know what he’s thinking about now. But I wait… he’s gonna tell me himself.

“I just think… I keep thinking, if they would have been happy? To see Heaven, all new, peaceful and powerful. All my brothers and sisters, who…” He stutters, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. The names, so many names.

“Samadriel.” He continues. “Hanna, Kelvin, Ezekiel, Muriel, Inias, Nithael, Rebecca, Joshua, Sofia, Ambriel, Zuriel… even Anna. And all those fools, who followed Metatron… or Bartholomew. Poor ones, who got their brains washed by Raphael.” His voice is very quiet. “And… Balthazar”

“I think it would” I can feel his pain, it curls around him, pulls him into the abyss of regret. “I- I hope so… All I know is that they are sleeping now, they are at peace, Castiel. No more screams in the Empty”

“Yes. Yes, I know. I remember” He rubs his face, like he wants to clean the sadness off it.

“I’m sorry, Jack.” He tries to smile. “I shouldn’t be so…”

I put my hand on his shoulder, calmingly, softly.

“It’s okay, I understand.”

***

“Ready?” Castiel looks at me fondly, and I crack my fingers with much enthusiasm.

“Yes! Absolutely”

“Just make sure they are not… dicks” he gives me the look and I nod approvingly.

“Will do!”

My hands are warm, I can feel the power flows inside me. Concentrates in my fingers, making them tremble. It starts with soft glowing, eventually increasing into a stream of light, that gathers into a luminous ball between my palms. It turns and grows, and it shines so bright. The light within the walls and ceiling of the white room is flickering too, encouranging me to continue.

“Hello!” I smile and raise my hand in greeting. “Welcome to Heaven. You are my first angel”

Angel looks at me, confused and bewildered.

“I like him.” I smile at Castiel. “I’m gonna name him Luke!”

He just laughs, he doesn’t argue.

We got so much work to do today.

***

“HWW!” His face is pure smugness. He turns the screen of his homemade laptop for us to take a look, but honestly, we don’t seem to follow.

“Hw-w?” Cas tilts his head. “Is that a reference? I- I’m afraid, I don’t get it, Ash”

“Yes! HWW!” Ash repeats, but his smile slowly fades, as he understands that we really have no idea what he’s talking about. “Guys, come on! Really?”

He said this project is something extremely important and cool, and it will be the fundamental part of New Heaven. But we don’t get it.

“World Wide Web! But it’s Heaven, so its’ gonna be the Heaven Wide Web!” He raises his hands above his head and shakes them victoriously. “Ta-daa!”

“The… Internet?!”

“Yes!” He slams his hands on the desk and starts typing something on keyboard. “Okay, I was thinking... Every soul is unique, right? It has it’s own structure, vibe.. whatever. And it’s own individual number here, right?”

We nod.

“What if we use it like the IP-address? And each soul will get it’s personal access point to the general communication centre? Just imagine, you can connect with any person you want.”

“Like texting!”

“With emoticons?” Cas smiles.

“Exactly. Heavenly social media.”

“With profile page and cat memes?” I like this idea more and more.

“Anything we want!”

“But wait… how do we explain it to souls from the past eras?”

“Easy.” Ash winks at Cas. “People have invented millions of ways to communicate with each other since the beginning of time. We can stick with anything usual for each period. Like, Shakespeare won’t need to use a phone, pigeons will fly to him through the window, bringing the message. “Hey, William, I’m your biggest fan from 1978. Can I come for a cuppa tea to discuss The Merchant of Venice?” And some hairy dude, who lives in a cave, will see new petroglyphs appear on the walls. You get me?”

“Ash…”

“Yeah, I kinda came up with this long ago… You break into someone’s Heaven, and sometimes they’re not very happy to see you, they don’t know, what the hell is going on. I remember Jimi chased me around the room trying to hit me with his guitar, thought I was a particularly vivid hallucination…” he adds dreamily. “So yeah, it’s way better to be able to send a message first, you know? To be connected, in general. And if you guys gonna break all the loops…”

“Ash. You’re genius! You really can do this?”

He shakes his head, adjusting his luxurious hairstyle.

"Already wrote an algorithm”

***

“They are truly so full of light” He’s just finished his conversation with the last one of the newly created angels, and he looks contented, considering the peaceful smile on his face. “Jack, they are wonderful”

“Of course. I intended them to be like you.”

“Like…” his eyes widen in astonishment. “Like me?”

“Yes.” I say simply. “You’re the best example I know.”

I feel his emotions. They overfill him, shine with the sparkle in his eyes, brighten every wrinkle on his face, warm the air through his skin.

The light. The love.

“Guardians, shepherds.” I continue. “Born to protect the peace and prosperity. Not the blunt instruments of war.”

“Jack…”

“All with a little too much heart. But no one will ever call it a crack in their chassis”

***

It doesn't look like a decoration anymore. Now I know what makes Heaven a Heaven.

People’s emotions. Feelings of joy, security, serenity. Warmth of loving hearts. And freedom, of course.

We are standing on the top of the mountain, mesmerising view of all the work done lies in front of our eyes. Castiel takes the last piece of broken wall, lying in front of his feet, it fades and shrinks in his palm, until vanishes completely.

“That’s it” He smiles. “You did it, Jack”

“No,” I shake my head. “WE did it. I couldn’t have done this without your help and support. Without your faith in me. Thank you”

I mean it. Everything I did, everything I’ve become. Impossible without him.

“Thank you, father”

We hold each other, like we used to. I’m sure, this is not our last hug, but it feels like the most important one. I put all my love and gratitude, all my devotion into this embrace. I want him to feel, to know, how much he means to me, that nothing has changed in my feelings for him. He is my father. And forever will be.

Angels, new and old, stand behind us, their wings shine in the light, casting glare on grass and trees. Сalmness and confidence on their faces, they are beautiful in their might and purity. I did a good job, I must admit.

“And now” I say, pulling back to look into Castiel’s eyes “We deserved a little celebration, don’t you think?”

“Agree” he smiles.

I click my fingers.

It’s the familiar bar. We appear, and the air explodes with loud cheering noises.

“What…” Castiel starts, but gasps with amazement.

It’s a good company, it’s the part of our found family. I don’t know all of them in person, but I’m familiar with their stories, all so important and irreplaceable.

Red haired woman is the first one to attack Castiel with a hug.

“Charlie!”

“Hey, big guy!” She laughs, bumping his shoulder. “Looking good, bitch!”

“Yeah… I-“

He has no chance to finish, Kevin attacks him next.

“Kevin…”

“Okay, okay! Back in the line, kid. Have some respect for the elders!” Bobby pushes him aside laughingly, and he and Mary step closer for a hug.

Castiel is bewildered, I think he might cry, but he holds himself together good so far.

Pamela, Mick and Jimmy finish the circle of greetings. Jimmy looks a bit awkward, like he’s not sure, if he has the right to be here. This is weird. Sure he has!

“Cas looks a little strange without his trench coat, don’t you think?” I hear from behind. I smile to the familiar voice.

“Hi, mom…”

Her hands are delicate and warm on my cheeks, she’s beaming with love.

“Hey, baby”

***

Everyone’s busy with yelling their drink orders to Jo and Ellen, Ash turns on the music box, as if bar isn’t full with cheerful chatter and laugh already. Cas and Kelly are the first ones to get their drinks, and now they stand aside, chatting cordially with each other. My mom and my dad. I don’t interrupt, they surely have a lot to talk about. And I…

I need to talk with a mother, too. But not with mine. There she stands, my dearest friend and my biggest regret, my horrible mistake and undeniable fault. And she smiles to me.

“Hello, Jack”

I can’t speak, her voice made me numb. I just look, I keep looking into her blue eyes, trying to find an accusation in them, sorrow, at least, but I don’t see anything alike. She is smiling her softest smile.

“What, you’re not even gonna give me a hug?”

“Mary, I…”

“Oh, come here!” She pulls me closer and wraps her arms around me. Suddenly, words burst out from the inside, an endless stream of remorse and guilt.

“Mary, I’m so sorry! I am so sorry, I didn’t want it to happen… It was so terrible, and I… I didn’t mean to, but it was my fault. I…”

“Jack…” she tries to interrupt me.

“I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry! Can you ever forgive me?”

“Jack!” She holds me so tight. “Jack, it’s okay…”

“You deserved so much better, I’m so sorry…”

“I know.” She pulls back, looking into my eyes. “I know it was an accident. Please, stop blaming yourself…”

“But it was my fault!”

“Jack!” She cups my face with her palms, her voice is calm and soft. “I don’t blame you. So please, stop blaming yourself. It wasn’t even you, real you.”

The tight knot in my chest looses a little. I know her sons have forgiven me, but to hear it from her… it changes everything. I feel like I’m finally free.

“We all have our path, mine has led me here. And I regret nothing, Jack. I’m at peace, I am happy here.”

“But your sons…”

“I can wait” She smiles. “Now I know, we’re all gonna end up here. And now Heaven is just… perfect! Thank you for this.”

Castiel is standing next to her, I didn't even notice how he came up closer to us. Mary puts her hands on our shoulders, squeezing them firmly.

“Thank you both! And if you want to do something nice for me,” she raises her eyebrows, looking me straight in the eyes “…make sure Sam and Dean die of old age lying in their warm beds, okay?!”

Maybe my eyes are sparkling with tears, but I nod, smiling broad and confident.

“Of course!”

“Not so difficult, considering that there’s an angel looking over them” she winks at Castiel, making him smile softly.

“Oh, about that…” I interrupt.

“What?”

“I think… someone is tired of spending his time, being a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent”

“Jack…” Castiel is looking at me with a slight confusion on his face. “What are you…”

“You still haven’t asked for your wings back.” I say quietly.

He hesitates, I can see the uncertainty and worrying in his eyes.

“I.. I just thought…”

“Because you don’t feel like you need them anymore.”

He looks down.

“Castiel?” Mary’s voice is gentle and mild, she leans to him, trying to catch his eyes. I guess… she understands. “Remember… remember that one night? I just got back from the dead, and I was so lost. We bumped into each other, in the bunker?”

He rises his head, looking at her attentively.

“Yes”

“I asked you, about the Earth, when did it start to feel like...like you fit, like you...belonged there? Remember? And you said…”

“I'm still not sure I do.” Yes..”

She smiles.

“And now, after everything…? I know what you did, Castiel. For us, for our family, for humanity in general… and for him. Do you know now?… Do you belong?”

He looks at her with gratitude. His face lights up, as if the last piece of the puzzle has been found and snapped into place, making him complete.

“Yes. I do”

“Well,” she laughs warmly. “Growing old must be fun. I don’t know, I never did!” She kisses his cheek. “Tell them, tell my boys, I’m happy here, tell them, I don’t regret a thing, okay?” They hug, and he nods into her shoulder. “And tell him…” she whispers cheerfully into his ear. “…tell him, he’s lucky as hell!”

Castiel can’t hold back the smile, and his cheeks flush with joy.

“Okay. Promise!”

Mary squeezes him in her arms once more and pats his shoulder, before walk off with a widest smile on her face.

“Jack. I…” he starts.

“I know.” He doesn’t needs to explain anything.

“Your grace is still in the process of being restored, but if you want, it can just ... vanish over time” I shrug and I smile. “Growing old with someone is what people do, right? Humans.”

He rubs his eyebrow with a soft and quiet laugh.

“Yes, they do…”

“And you both gonna eventually end up here, you and him.”

“Not the worst option, I guess” He smiles.

He looks at all the people in this small wooden bar, their faces are full of joy, their laugh is light-hearted. Company broke into unexpected duos, like Kevin and Ash, discussing some technical stuff over Ash’s scanner, or Pamela and Mick sharing their theories on the matter of astral projections. This will be the the most popular spot in Heaven, probably. But now…

“Tell me when you’re ready to go back.”

“Yes. Only need to collect all the messages from everyone, to pass them to Sam and Dean personally. Probably, not only to Sam and Dean…” he waves at Jimmy.

“Of course! We have all the time in the world here”

“Yes,” he nods. “We’re not in a rush”

We’re not in a rush, father. Take your time, you deserve to spend it with people, who care about you.

Both on Earth and in Heaven.

You are loved.

***

tag list:

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