LANDOSCAR || 115 || Medical AU
Title: 115
Pairing: Landoscar
Summary: “No reason to be nervous, Mr. Piastri.” Lando assures him innocently enough, but Oscar can sense something in his tone that matches the devious glint in his eye. He is going to be sick. He’s going to be sick all over Lando’s very nice white coat and very stylish pinstripe pants and then he is going to have to leave with his tail between his legs and ask to never be seen at this facility ever again. “Take a deep breath or two, it should help calm your heart rate.”
Physician's assistant Lando, and awkward patient Oscar, at your service!
Notes: Based off of one of the very first conversations @watercolor-hearts and I ever had. She drew this absolutely stunning piece to compliment our conversation, and so I chose to write a little something short based off of it and the artwork as well. Click here to see her amazing work!
**also, I am aware how unprofessional this does get at the end. I am not going for realism, I am going for fanfiction and fun**
Oscar is not particularly a fan of the routine physicals he’s forced to endure. The usual doctor they send out is dull and very obviously uninspired by his job (and maybe even by life, if Oscar is being honest), and the whole session is so stiff and boring that he finds himself counting down the seconds until his torture is over.
He understands the necessity of routine physical exams as an athlete, and he respects them, but he doesn’t have to like them.
He’s currently sitting atop a cold, uncomfortable metal exam table (which is pretty preposterous, they do make them with padding nowadays) and swinging his feet a bit as he waits impatiently for the doctor to make his appearance. At least, if nothing else, the room isn’t stark white and scented like a profane mixture of alcohol and disinfectant. The walls are painted more of a warm beige, and unsurprisingly, the accents in the room are a strikingly familiar papaya color - Oscar expects no less from a McLaren-affiliated facility.
The door finally swings open with a click, and Oscar’s attention snaps over from the incredibly interesting smudge on the wall to greet the doctor. He takes a breath to speak, but the words die in his throat the moment his brain registers that the person who has just entered the room is not his normal doctor at all.
No, this doctor is very different. He’s far younger, to start, and just a bit taller as well. Instead of a receding hairline and wisps of gray hair desperately clinging to life, this doctor has a full head of dark ringlet curls that look as though they’ve been freshly styled. There is a dusting of facial hair on his chin and above his upper lip (which is actually curled into a smile, also unlike the usual doctor), and his eyes are bright and friendly. Really, he is the exact opposite of the man Oscar expected to see, and perhaps he’s a tad grateful for that.
He swallows thickly, forcing away all of the thoughts that have started ganging up on him in his mind about just how attractive this new young doctor is - because that isn’t professional, for either of them, of course - and offers a smile.
“Morning.” Oscar finally grits out, and now the attention of those bright eyes is focused directly on him. Fantastic.
“Good morning, Mr. Piastri. My name is Lando Norris, and I’m one of the physician assistants here. Doctor Lowery was feeling a bit under the weather today, so I hope it’s no bother that you’ll be seeing me instead.”
“Not a bother at all, actually.” Oscar assures him, sticking his hand forward to offer a handshake. A bit of a habit, that, but Lando doesn’t seem bothered as he grabs Oscar’s hand and shakes it firmly. Of course it would be firm. Why wouldn’t it be firm?
“Excellent. So you’re just here for a quick head-to-toe, yes? Any complaints going in that I should know about before we start?” Lando asks, and Oscar watches as his fingers fiddle with the bell of the stethoscope that’s looped around his neck.
“No, no complaints. Strictly routine - orders from McLaren and all.”
Lando nods, slow and forceful like he may understand exactly what Oscar is talking about, before looking down at the tablet in his hands and reading over some data. Oscar watches him carefully, admiring the crinkle at the corner of his eye as he smiles, clearly happy with whatever it is he may be reading on the screen of his tablet.
“Good. Looks like the nurse already took your vitals - heart rate is sixty-seven, oxygen saturation at ninety-nine percent, and blood pressure is one-ten over seventy-four. Couldn’t ask for much better than that, really.” Lando says, placing the tablet down to the side and stepping forward to prepare for the exam. He reaches into the pockets of his white coat, pulling out a pair of bright orange (of course) gloves and fitting his hands into them without much of a fuss. “I’ll be quick, I promise. I know you would rather be anywhere else than here.”
Though Oscar chuckles like he is in absolute agreement with that statement, the entire atmosphere of this exam is far more welcoming and perhaps even a bit exciting when it’s conducted by a doctor who is friendly, understanding, and - well, attractive. Attention from an attractive man is not something Oscar gets to indulge in frequently, if ever at all, so he has every intention of eating this up for the short time he gets to spend with Lando.
“By all means, take your time.”
Lando grins at that, just a soft and fleeting thing that Oscar happens to catch because he cannot stop staring like an absolute certified weirdo, but it makes Oscar’s heart flutter in the strangest of ways and he isn’t sure he likes that just yet.
The exam itself is horribly routine. Lando checks his eyes, ears, and throat. He tests Oscar’s reflexes, palpates around his abdomen, listens to his abdomen, among a whole myriad of things that Oscar is so used to at this point that he barely pays it any mind. The only thing, embarrassingly, he can focus on are the moments where Lando’s hands are against his skin, regardless of them being gloved. He can still feel the warmth of Lando’s fingertips through the thin rubber and it sends shivers down his spine that he physically wrestles to keep from letting loose. Also, he notices that Lando is horribly thorough (horribly, because that means a lot more time and attention is spent on Oscar than he’s used to and it’s making his heart race uncomfortably). A wonderful trait for a budding physician’s assistant, to be sure, but not a help at all to Oscar’s current predicament.
“Alright, I’ll just have a listen to your chest and back, and I’ll be able to send you on your way to your next set of tests.” Lando announces, pulling his stethoscope loose from around his neck once more. He still has that precious little smile on his face and Oscar is having a hard time discerning if he’s simply polite, new, or enjoying this form of light-torture that he’s unknowingly subjecting Oscar to.
“You sound eager to get rid of me.” Oscar says, flicking his gaze up to meet Lando’s. That polite little grin breaks out into a full blown smile and wow, okay, Oscar was not quite ready for it to be that bright and beautiful. Horrible idea, should have kept his mouth sealed shut. Should have smiled and nodded. Should not have made the cute physician’s assistant beam like a ray of sun
“Not at all, actually. You’re my first and last for the day, so I have all the time in the world.” Lando replies, fastening the tips of his stethoscope into his ears. “I’m quite new here, so my patients are limited for the time being.”
New. That makes a whole lot more sense to Oscar, then. He nods in understanding, sitting up a bit straighter on the examination table to better prepare for the next part of the exam. “Yeah, I’m quite new as well - in terms of what I do, anyway. I’m obviously not a doctor or anything, but I reckon you’re doing a good job. You’re a lot friendlier than Dr. Lowery, anyway.”
“As I aspire to be,” Lando laughs, a cheerful little sound that Oscar won’t soon forget, “Though I don’t think it's particularly hard, but you didn’t hear that from me.”
“I didn’t need to hear it from you, I’ve suffered through being his patient for the last few months.”
“Dear oh dear, I’m not going to incriminate myself any further, then.” Lando fastens him with a rather playful expression, but Oscar chooses not to read too deeply into it. They are professionals, after all. Being very, very professional. “Now, I’ll start with your lungs first. Just breathe normally until I tell you otherwise, please.”
The press of the stethoscope against his back is cool, but not unpleasant. There’s only a slight hitch to his breath when he feels the tips of Lando’s gloved fingers scrape against his skin, otherwise he does as he’s instructed to do and he breathes normally. He can feel the diaphragm move around to a few different spots on his back, before Lando clears his throat.
“Deep breath, please.”
Oscar obeys, and then he does again, and again, and again. The stethoscope is then moved around to his chest on the right side and he’s asked for one last deep breath, before it’s slipped off entirely for a moment.
“Okay, good. That’s all clear. I’ll listen to your heart now, if that’s alright?” Lando asks, to which Oscar nods and offers a very helpful but painfully awkward, “Mmhmm.”
The diaphragm of the stethoscope is gently placed against his skin once more - this time over his heart. His traitorous, evil little heart that he can feel is beating much, much quicker than its normal pace. He has to hold back a sigh when he sees Lando’s brows furrow in concern, and he knows at that very moment he’s been outed. There is no possible way to hide his heartbeat from a physician’s assistant of all people, and there is no possible way for him to slow its pace down without alerting Lando, either.
Lando continues to listen for a few moments, moving the diaphragm around to a few different points, before he finally looks up and meet’s Oscar’s gaze, “A bit nervous, as I hear?”
“Yeah…” Oscar flounders lamely, unable to come up with a decent excuse or explanation for his wild heartbeat. And, to top it all off, he can feel a light blush warming his cheeks.
“No reason to be nervous, Mr. Piastri.” Lando assures him innocently enough, but Oscar can sense something in his tone that matches the devious glint in his eye. He is going to be sick. He’s going to be sick all over Lando’s very nice white coat and very stylish pinstripe pants and then he is going to have to leave with his tail between his legs and ask to never be seen at this facility ever again. “Take a deep breath or two, it should help calm your heart rate.”
“Right, of course.” That had been Oscar’s original plan, thwarted in favor of not drawing Lando’s attention to his little predicament. Too late for that now, so he supposes there’s no real harm in giving it a try. He takes two very pointed deep breaths, ones that he chooses to hold in his lungs for a count of five seconds and exhale out slowly. Not once does Lando remove the stethoscope, and Oscar assumes he is simply monitoring to make sure his heart rate actually decelerates.
The look on Lando’s face tells him that it does not.
“Well, it was worth a shot. I will just assume this is a bit of white-coat syndrome and not something that happens frequently for you?” Lando asks, flipping the stethoscope over by clicking the bell into place. He then presses it back to Oscar’s chest, eyes meeting his gaze as he waits for a response.
“That’s a fair assumption. I never have issues with my heart normally.”
Oscar isn’t sure if it’s something he said, or if it’s merely the implications of his words, but Lando offers another bright, toothy smile and by god, he has the most adorable little gap in his front teeth that Oscar has ever seen. These are variables that do not help his predicament. These are variables that make things much, much worse for him. He should not be admiring Lando’s perfect little springy curls, or his ridiculously beaming smile with the gap in his teeth, and especially not his bright eyes that sparkle with every grin and crinkle at the corners when he’s amused. He feels like he’s been tossed into a raging river without a safety vest and he’s about to plummet down a ten-story waterfall.
“Well, the good news is - despite your high heart rate - everything else sounds completely normal. Heart sounds are clear and distinguishable, and I didn’t hear any murmurs or bruits. Not that I���m too surprised, you are a professional athlete after all.” Lando says, pulling the earbuds out of his ears and looping the stethoscope back around his neck. Oscar hopes it’s for good this time, his heart has had enough of this downright tomfoolery, really. “Clocked you at around one hundred and fifteen beats per minute though, and I’d really like to see that come down below one hundred before you leave.”
Oscar has to blink back shock as Lando reads out his heart rate. One hundred and fifteen is a number he typically only sees doing warm ups or light exercises, but never when he’s sitting at rest. The utter embarrassment is startling, but Oscar knows if he can just focus for a damned minute, on anything but Lando and his ridiculously attractive face, he can pull himself back together in enough time to run out of this appointment and never look back.
“One-fifteen?” Oscar parrots, just making sure he’s heard Lando correctly (even if he knows he has). “I reckon I can fix that, just give me a second.”
Lando raises an eyebrow at Oscar, but gives him a nod of encouragement to do whatever it is Oscar thinks he needs to. Oscar decides to lie himself back across the expanse of the examination table and look up directly at the ceiling tiles above him. Once in position, he takes three more of the same deep breaths he took only a moment ago. This time, however, Lando’s face isn’t right in front of him. Lando isn’t touching him. His heart rate isn’t being consistently monitored. And, a fun talent he’s learned being an F1 driver, he can clear his mind at the drop of a hat when he needs to - so he does.
At the end of the last breath, he can feel the way his body relaxes against the metal table beneath him. It must have done wonders for his heart rate, because he can’t hear it hammering away in his ears anymore and his mind is at much more ease. He sits himself back up, purposefully avoiding looking at Lando’s face, and holds a wrist out to him. “That should do me.”
Lando’s fingers immediately press against the pulse point in his wrist, and Oscar dares to look over for even the barest hint of a moment. Lando’s lips move ever so slightly as he counts beneath his breath and, for fuck’s sake, that is going to mess with his reading again. It’s going to, he knows it –
“Eighty-one. Pretty impressive how quickly you managed that.” Lando comments, sliding his fingers away from Oscar’s wrist to grab for the tablet he left abandoned at the beginning of the exam. Oscar hates the way his wrist feels so cold now, but the relief of being able to manage his heart rate under the scrutiny of someone who is at illegal levels of attractiveness is far more palpable for him. He offers a triumphant nod and lets his shoulders relax, kicking his feet in the dead air for a moment or two.
“Meditation, mate. Another key component of being a good athlete.” Oscar isn’t sure why he chooses to speak again, or what force of nature decided it would be a good idea. Lando’s eyes flick up from the glow of his tablet screen and meet Oscar’s gaze again, and he’s flashing that stupid, stupid, stupid little smile.
“Good skill to have, mate.” Lando retorts, putting emphasis on the endearment. Oscar wants to pass out on the floor, unconscious, and pretend this day never happened. “I’ve never been much good at it myself.”
No, no, no. He knows better. He knows better than to entertain the idea. He knows better than to take a breath to speak, or to part his lips. He knows better, and yet, “I’d be more than happy to help you out sometime.”
Unconsciousness is not enough. He needs to be locked in a room twenty feet underground for one to six business days to think about what he’s done.
The surprise on Lando’s face is immediate. His eyebrows shoot up, clearly not expecting such a bold offer, and his lips hang open awkwardly in shock. He seems, momentarily, at a loss for words, and the longer the offer lingers in the silence, the more Oscar wants to crawl up inside of his shirt and hide away from the world.
Oscar is an idiot. He knows Lando cannot accept these sorts of things - he’s a professional after all.
“Uhm,” Lando hums after a few more moments of painfully awkward silence. His cheeks are dusted a bright pink now, and his eyes dart away from Oscar’s face to something apparently very interesting in the far corner of the room.
“No, I’m sorry. That was really forward of me and I know you can’t accept it. It’s okay.” Oscar says, in an attempt to remedy this horrific situation he’s caused. “I know you-”
“So that wasn’t white coat syndrome then, was it?” Lando cuts him off, eyes snapped back to drilling holes in Oscar’s soul.The comment catches him off guard, and he blinks a few times at Lando before tilting his head. “I made you nervous, didn’t I?”
“Lando…I don’t want to get you in trouble-”
“Oh you won’t. Just know that once I put my phone number in your phone - let me see your phone by the way - I can’t see you as my patient anymore. You’ll go back to Dr. Lowery for the rest of the foreseeable future.”
Oscar’s eyes are wide in complete and utter shock. The tone of the conversation has changed so suddenly, his brain is reeling to try and catch up. Lando’s hand is outstretched towards him, palm-up and expectant, and so Oscar fumbles to grab his phone from the table and swipe his thumbprint over the lock before handing it over.
“You - That – just like that?” Oscar sputters, a bit lamely, at that. He watches Lando tap against his phone as he adds his contact information in, and then the device is handed back to him with a brilliant, megawatt smile.
“Just like that. And you better not leave me hanging, Mr. Piastri.”
It’s funny, Oscar thinks, just how ridiculous his life can truly be sometimes. A quick glance down at his watch (which Lando must have pointedly ignored, now, Oscar realizes), shows his heart rate back up at one-fifteen and climbing. He needs to get out of here before he decides to somehow make a further fool out of himself. He’s already gotten more than he bargained for and an overall good result from both his physical, and his poor attempts at flirting with the cute physician’s assistant. It’s time to quit while he’s ahead, and claim the win for what it is.
He looks up at Lando and flashes him a megawatt smile of his own. It’s every bit warm and bright and delighted, and his heart flips in his chest when their eyes meet and Lando offers him a very disjointed, two-eyed wink. Of course he wouldn’t be able to wink properly, of course he just continues to spiral into the realm of ‘illegally adorable.’
Oscar sighs, sliding himself down from the examination table as he prepares to leave. Not that he particularly wants to, he would stay here with Lando all day if his schedule allowed for it. But sadly, cruelly, it does not. The universe can only afford him so much grace.
“Wouldn’t ever dream of it, Mr. Norris.”
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