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d-criss-news · 3 years

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20 Questions With Darren Criss: How Acting Has Helped Him Make New Music

While Darren Criss has graced our TV screens with a range of characters, from high schooler Blaine Anderson on Glee to serial killer Andrew Cunanan on The Assassination of Gianni Versace, he was last spotted just being himself, on our For You Page on TikTok. “I’m walking to rehearsal with a guitar on my back with a Trader Joe’s bag ... I did not bring an umbrella because I forgot that it was raining. I’m rocking that NYC musician life,” the Glee alum explained in the hilarious clip posted three days ago.

While Criss’ acting work has earned him acclaim and stardom, he leaned into making music during the pandemic. On Aug. 20, he dropped a new EP, Masquerade, featuring five new tracks that Criss says were inspired by the different characters Criss has embraced throughout his career. After Criss wrote songs for his musical comedy web series Royalties and Apple TV+’s animated sitcom Central Park before the pandemic struck the United States, he then used those experiences as a precursor to his new EP. As Criss continues to promote his new music, he answered 20 of Billboard's questions – giving us a peek into how his new EP came together, and how growing up in San Fransisco shaped him as an actor, singer and all-around artist.

1. What inspired your latest project, Masquerade?

Although I would have preferred that it come at a far less grim cost, I finally had the time. Before the pandemic, I had written 10 new songs for my show Royalties -- along with an original song for Disney and another for Apple’s Central Park. These were all assignments in which I was writing for a certain scenario and character. Go figure. It was the most music I had ever written in a calendar year. This really emboldened me to rethink how I made my own music— to start putting a focus on “character creation” in my songs, rather than personal reflection. The latter was not proving to be as productive. The alchemy of having this time and having set a new intention with my own songwriting and producing made me put on a few of my favorite masques and throw myself a Masquerade.

2. How do you think your background as an actor complements your music?

They are one and the same to me. I treat acting roles like musical pieces— dialogue is like scoring a melody; there’s pace, dynamics, cadence, tone. Physical characterization is like producing -- zeroing in on the bass line, deciding on the kick pattern. Vocal characterization is like choosing the right sonic experience, choosing the most effective snare sound, and mixing the high end or low end. It goes without saying that it works in the complete opposite direction. Making each song is taking on a different role literally and employing the use of different masques to maximize the effectiveness of the particular story being told.

3. On Instagram you wrote that “Masquerade is a small collection of the variety of musical masques that have always inspired me.” Which track do you identify with most in your real life?

Everybody absorbs songs differently. Some key into the lyrics, some into the melody, some the production, some into vocal performance. When I listen to songs, I consider all of their value on totally different scales. So it’s hard to say if there’s any track I “identify” with more than any others, since I -- by nature -- identify with all of them. I think I just identify with certain aspects more than others. If it helps for a more interesting answer, I will say I enjoy the slightly more classical, playful -- dare I say -- more Broadway-leaning wordplay of “Walk of Shame,” but that’s just talking about lyricism. I enjoy the attitude of “F*kn Around,” the batsh--t musicality of “I Can’t Dance,” the relentless grooves of “Let’s” and “For A Night Like This.” All have different ingredients I really enjoy having an excuse to dive into.

4. What’s the first piece of music that you bought for yourself, and what was the medium?

Beatles audio cassettes: “Help” and “Hard Day’s Night.” I just listened on repeat on a tape-playing Walkman until my brother and I got a stereo for our room with a CD player in it, which was when I just bought the same two albums again, but this time as compact discs.

5. What was the first concert you saw?It’s hard to say, because my parents took us to a lot of classical concerts when we were small. But I guess this question usually refers to what was the first concert you went to on your own volition, and that my friend, was definitely Warped Tour ’01. My brother and I went on our own— two teenagers going to their first music festival, in the golden age of that particular genre and culture. It was f--king incredible.

6. What did your parents do for a living when you were a kid?

My dad was in private banking and advised really, really wealthy people on how to handle their money. My mom was, by choice, a stay-at-home mom, but in reality, she was my dad’s consigliere. They discussed absolutely everything together. They were a real team, and I saw that every single day in the house. They both had a background in finance (That’s how they met in the first place.) and were incredibly skilled at all the hardcore adulting things that I absolutely suck at. They were total finance wizards together. So of course, instead of becoming an accountant, I picked up playing the guitar and ran as far I could with it. Luckily, they were all about it.

7. What was your favorite homecooked meal growing up?

My dad was an incredible chef. For special occasions, I’d request his crab cakes. They were unreal. I’ve never had a crab cake anywhere in the world that was good as my dad’s.

8. Who made you realize you could be an artist full-time?

I don’t know if I’ve actually realized that yet.

9. What’s at the top of your professional bucket list?

The specifics change every day, but the core idea at the top is to continue being consistently inconsistent with my choices, and to keep getting audiences to constantly reconsider their consideration of me. But I mean, sure, what performer doesn’t want to play Coachella? What songwriter doesn’t want to have Adele sing one of their songs? What actor doesn’t want to be in a Wes Anderson film?

10. How did your hometown/city shape who you are?

San Francisco. I mean, come on. I was really lucky. The older I get, the more grateful I am for just being born and raised there. It’s an incredibly diverse, culturally rich, colorful, inclusive, vibrant city. By the time I was born, it had served as a beacon for millions of creative, out-of-the-box thinkers to gather and thrive. I grew up around that. The combination of that with having parents, who were unbelievably supportive of the arts themselves, laid an incredibly fortunate foundation to consider the life of an artist as a legitimately viable option. It’s a foundation that I am supremely aware is not the case for millions of young artists around the world. I was absurdly lucky.

11. What’s the last song you listened to?

I mean probably one of mine, but not by choice. I know, lame. But I’m promoting a new EP, what’d you expect? But if you wanna know what I’ve been listening to, as far as new s--t is concerned: a lot of Lizzy McAlpine, Remi Wolf, and Charlie Burg.

12. If you could see any artist in concert, dead or alive, who would it be?

The Beatles is an obvious "yeah, duh." Sammy Davis, Mel Tormé, or of course, Nat King Cole. I would’ve loved to see Howard Ashman give a lecture on his creative process and his body of work.

13. What’s the wildest thing you’ve seen happen in the crowd of one of your sets?

I feel like just having a crowd at all, at any one of my sets, is pretty wild enough.

14. What’s your karaoke go-to?

The real answer to this I’ll write into a book one day, because I have a lot to say about karaoke etiquette. I have two options here: I can either name a song that I like to sing for me, for fun, or I can name a song that really gets the group going. The answer depends on what kind of karaoke night we’re dealing with here. So I will say, after I’ve selected a ton of songs that services a decent enough party vibe for everyone else, then I would do one for me, and that would be the Beatles’ “Oh! Darling.”

15. What’s one thing your most devoted fans don’t know about you?

What I have up my sleeve.

16. What TV show did you binge-watch over the past year?

Dave is a stroke of genius. There are episodes that I believe are bona fide masterpieces. Also, My Brilliant Friend is a masterclass in cinematic television.

17. What movie, or song, always makes you cry?

It’s A Wonderful Life.

18. What’s one piece of advice you would give to your younger self?

Get used to sharing everything about yourself and your life now, or more astutely, to the idea that you don’t necessarily get to control how your life is shared. I know it’s not really your thing, but you’re gonna have to get used to it, so start building up those calluses now. And don’t worry, all the stuff you love now will be cool again in your mid-thirties, so keep some of those clothes because you’ll be a full-blown fashion icon if you just keep wearing exactly what you’re wearing. Oh nd also, put money into Apple and Facebook.

19. What new hobby did you take on in the last year?

I’ve always been a linguaphile. My idea of leisure time is getting to study or review other languages. This past year, I took the time to finally dive into learning how to read, write, and speak Japanese. Other than making music, it was one of the biggest components of my 2020-2021.

20. What do you hope to accomplish or experience by the end of 2021?

I hope I get to play live shows again.

#darren criss #billboard #masquerade ep #press #sept 2021

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thumbgarden · 3 years

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How to grow thyme in a pot: secret for growing on a windowsill

Thyme is widely used in culinary, medical, and cosmetic applications. It is rapidly gaining popularity among housewives due to its aroma, unusual flavor, and useful properties. To grow thyme in how to grow thyme in a pot, it must be planted correctly, providing the necessary light, optimum temperature, and humidity.

WHY IS THYME SO POPULAR? Thyme is valued not only for its beautiful appearance and fragrant aroma but also for its excellent medicinal properties. In folk medicine. Thyme tea is fragrant and rich in useful vitamins, active ingredients that soothe the nervous system, eliminate pain, cope with colds, and many other diseases. From its leaves and flowers make decoctions, infusions, essential oils. Dried thyme herbs are added to pillows for a deeper and healthier sleep. In the old days, thyme was used to fumigate rooms to get rid of germs and pests.

BENEFITS OF THYME AND ITS USES Thyme is often referred to as the herb of witches and Vedas. The ancient Slavs revered thyme as a sacred plant. In pagan rituals, it was used to burn on bonfires to attract the mercy of the gods. In pagan rituals, thyme was used to burn on bonfires to attract the favor of the gods. Thyme is a wonderful herb with a pleasant flavor and many beneficial effects. In addition, this herb has some decorative properties, which is an added bonus when cultivated in living room conditions. Using thyme in the home can be done in the following cases. Use thyme for cooking and add it in moderation due to its strong natural flavor.

THYME: WHICH VARIETY IS POPULAR TO GROW? Although there are more than 300 varieties of this plant, only four species are grown in garden plots. Its medicinal and decorative properties are the most obvious. Marshall's thyme. Used to treat eye diseases. Thyme creeper. Planting and post-care are useful for treating cold and cough, stomach aches, and promoting digestion. Common thyme. This variety has been specially bred. It is used to treat runny nose, colds, gastritis, and pancreatitis. Thyme tea is a good antiseptic. Plant this thyme in flower beds and decorate the site. Thyme Lemon. The leaves are greenish-yellow in color and the plant has a pleasant lemon smell. Feel free to choose one of them!

GATHERING THYME Collect the herb if you want to dry it for future introduction into a spice mixture or save it for a decoction, just in case. Take only the flowering plants. Slant the stem and cut it with a sharp knife. By breaking off the branches, irreparable damage is done to the entire bush. Harvesting thyme during flowering Thyme should be dried according to general regulations, spread on a sack or gauze, and placed in a cool place. The herbs can also be hung in bunches in the attic to dry in the sun.

HOW TO GROW THYME?

Growing thyme in the open ground does not require superb effort or the application of special knowledge. Thyme perfectly tolerates the conditions of non-droughty summers and snowy winters. For fast growth and development, abundant flowering requires a lot of water, so the climate of the Moscow region creates the best conditions for him. Bred from wild varieties, thyme grows well on any soil except acidic clay. Strong frosts do not scare this plant either. If thyme is planted in a warm, sunny spot in a garden plot, it will grow healthily and quickly. To prevent the stem from rotting during the off-season when it is over-watered, cover the soil next to the stem with small pebbles or gravel for drainage. Thyme looks great as a decorative element for garden paths. Planting it at the edge of a pathway gives it a cultivated look. This plant is also suitable for rose gardens and alpine landscaping and is a good decoration for ponds. And if planted near a house, you can not only get aesthetic pleasure looking at its intricate inflorescence but also breathe in the scent of flowers in the early morning and evening. Planting different species of thyme in flower beds can enhance the decorative effect.

HOW IS THIS PLANT PROPAGATED? Thyme can be grown in three ways. 1. Thyme seeds are planted in early spring. You can plant this plant in the late fall. In this case, sow the seeds before the onset of frost to prevent them from freezing. First make sure that the soil is prepared: dig it, loosen it, and remove weeds and other plant roots. Then apply compost. Instead, you can add well-rotted manure and mineral fertilizer, urea, all mixed with the soil. 2. Now the seeds can be sown. After sowing, cover the seeds with soil, water them and additionally cover the bed with coarse sand. This will prevent water from being trapped in the area where the seedlings are growing. 3. When the plants have grown a little, the seedlings should be thinned slightly to make them stronger, healthier, and more viable.

PLANTING SEEDLINGS A thyme seedling can be planted in a vacant lot. To do this, sow the seeds in a special container and cover them with the film. Wait until they will germinate and sprout. After about a month, transfer the grown plants to the open air to acclimatize and harden them. If after 14 days the plants continue to grow actively and look healthy and neat, they are transplanted to a permanent open ground, the soil is dug beforehand and enriched with fertilizer and trace elements.

PLANT PLANTS WITH WELL-DEVELOPED ROOTSTOCKS Thyme can be purchased from amateur gardeners at the market or in stores. It is important to note that when buying rhizomes with open roots, pay attention to the condition of the roots, stems, and leaves. It is necessary to buy only healthy plants. If in doubt, it is best to refuse the purchase immediately. The roots must be well developed. However, even a weak root system can be improved, and when the roots go into growth, new roots will appear from the stem of the plant. The main thing is that there is no decay or insect damage on it. The plant should be robust, with a sturdy stem and dense, glossy, elastic leaves. A slightly wilted plant should not be purchased. It may wither over time or it may wilt completely. Growing thyme with a closed root system and buying it in a special place will not cause difficulties. The plant should be carefully removed from the container, checked for decay, cleaned and righted if necessary, and then planted in prepared soil. Water and cover near the stem for drainage.

HOW TO CHOOSE A PLANTING LOCATION? Thyme is best planted in a southern, sunny part of the garden. If you plant it in the shade, its bushes will look loose, the leaves will be small and the stems will stretch. It will be more difficult to accumulate the ideal concentration of substances and essential oils useful for him. An approximately pleasant aroma is impossible. The plant simply cannot produce a strong odor. Thyme, which grows on the warm, sunny side, takes the form of a small, dense shrub. If its leaves and branches are cut regularly, it grows wider. With proper care, thyme grass can take on a bulbous shape in the fall. This plant will look especially good in a flower bed and can be used as a decoration for any flower garden.

COLLECTION AND STORAGE The edible and medicinal thyme herbs are harvested twice during the growing season. in June, the flowers and herbs contain the most flavorful and medicinal substances. The second cutting of the green mass is planned for the end of August. The harvest of the herbs is commemorated especially on Church feasts such as Pentecost and the Assumption. There is a popular belief that these harvests multiply the positive effects of the herbs.

Thyme has a weak root system with shallow roots that do not tolerate hand harvesting. The only proper way to harvest these aromatic herbs is to cut them.

Bale the raw material to dry and hang it in a dry place, out of direct sunlight. A small amount of thyme can be dried in a thin layer at home or in a place protected from the sun and rain. Drying is crucial. Thyme is stored by grinding or milling the thyme and removing the stem. Ready to use, the powder is poured into an airtight container such as a coffee can. The container should be kept in a dark place, such as a kitchen cupboard. Tight-fitting paper and canvas bags are suitable for dried herbs, but they will lose the fragrance of the essential oil. The properties of the plant can be preserved for up to two years. Cultivation of thyme is justified in several cases: for cooking, for decorating and flavoring the garden, for medicinal purposes. The unpretentious culture can grow in harsh conditions unsuitable for other plants. Thyme is easy to grow due to its resistance to changes in weather conditions and adaptability. With proper care, the plant grows rapidly and has an abundant and prolonged flowering period.

CARE OF THYME The care of thyme is not at all tedious.

1. Watering A plant can go for a long time without water. However, it should still be watered in the dry summer months.

2. Fertilization In the spring, fertilize with a solution of cow manure. He also needs ash, which is added to the soil and pre-mixed with it.

3. Replanting To make the shrub look better, dig away the soil from its shoots. The shoots are placed in a pit and covered with freshly fertilized soil. To improve reliability, you can press them with special staples. With time, new roots will form and the sprouted plants can be planted in other areas.

4. Pruning Thyme is pruned during the flowering period. At this time, the concentration of essential oils in its leaves and flowers is at its highest. After pruning, cover the plant with loose soil and water it. The cut stems, flowers, and leaves are dried in a cool place and then packed in canvas bags. Gardeners have long had a fondness for this low-growing groundcover herb, with its carpet of flowers and distinctive scent. But thyme isn't just grown for garden design purposes. The plant, commonly known as thyme, has long been noted for its medicinal value and its ability to flavor meat dishes, soups, salads, and marinades. In ancient Egypt, thyme was used in rituals.

CAN THYME BE GROWN IN POTS? Many people want to know if they can grow the spice at home. Thyme is very suitable for growing in an apartment because it is not too fussy and does not require much care. Therefore, even people who have no experience in growing thyme can cope with planting and growing spices. To plant, you just need to choose a suitable container for the spice, plant it, and place it in a well-lit room. If you grow it in your apartment, you will have to water it regularly to prevent the soil from drying out and fertilize it.

THE MAIN VARIETIES OF THYME

Among a large number of thyme, species are. 1. The common ones. Comes to us from southern France and Spain. Characterized by small, lance-shaped leaves, dark green color, and delicate purple flowers. 2. Prostrate (creeping). Mediterranean species with leathery leaves of various colors. The purple flowers have a beautiful pinkish hue. This thyme is frost and drought tolerant and is considered an excellent honeybee. 3. Lemon scented. This is a hybrid from southern France, named for its lemony tart flavor. Over time, the yellow leaves turn green. The flowers are a delightful pink color. Poor frost tolerance needs shade during the cold season and regular pruning. 4. Plant Honey. Foliage is strong, perennial hybrids are drought and cold resistant and productive. Excellent for beehives and garden decorations. Used fresh and dried, in cooking and folk medicine.

CUTTINGS OF THYME

"If it is a spontaneous decision to cultivate thyme in the window, X when there is no pot or soil mixture at home, green cuttings can be allowed to take root in a glass, which can be made of dark glass or specially blackened"

If you're not ready for the long process of growing thyme from seed, you can try accelerated propagation. To get fresh spicy herbs, you need to stock up on potted plants, free up your windowsill and buy fresh thyme herbs from the supermarket. Follow the instructions Bring a package of thyme, carefully unpack it, and select the best-preserved flowering branch from the total mass. Make a diagonal cut in the stem. This requires a sharp knife. Tear off the leaves underneath and submerge the cuttings in water, allowing them to remain in the water for another five to six hours. This works very well if you use melted water heated to room temperature. Adding honey (half a teaspoon is enough for half a liter of water) will promote better rooting. While the cuttings are sitting in the water, prepare the pot. It should be scalded with boiling water and the bottom should be covered with clay pebbles. Drainage is watered with a layer of fertile soil. It should take up a third of the volume. The rest will be occupied by coarse-grained series of calcined sands. These are watered with a pink manganese solution.

In one pot, plant four cuttings per pot. After planting, they are sprayed with water and arranged in greenhouse conditions. The pots are covered with a half-liter jar, which you should remember to lift periodically to allow air to reach the shoots. The roots of the cuttings will form in about the second or third week. During this time, the jar will also be removed. Half a month from this point, the seedlings can be planted in their own containers with standard fertile soil. In case of a spontaneous decision to cultivate thyme in the window, X when there are no pots or soil mixtures at home, green cuttings can be rooted in a glass, which can be made of dark glass or special dark glass. Room temperature water saturated with activated charcoal tablets and a few grains of the hydrogel. As soon as the microclimate of the windowsill is dry and warm, the glass is placed in a polyethylene bag and filled with air in the latter and tied. In such germination, roots will appear within 20 days. Transplant the seedlings into pots filled with light, fertile soil, taking care not to chip off the swollen hydrogel particles from the roots. Thyme cuttings are rooted within 20 days.

Watering Thyme should be watered moderately and only when the soil is sufficiently dry. Only young shoots should be planted on dry food. Thyme bushes are planted in their second year when new shoots begin to emerge from the roots. Like allspice herbs, it responds to mineral fertilizers.

Thyme in winter During this period, it is best to remove thyme from the windowsill and send it to a glass balcony, for example, to provide the plant with a period of rest. Only during frosty weather, when the temperature on the balcony is not too low, can it become a shelter. Readings below -5°C (23°F) are a concern and the thyme has been moved to another warmer location Practice and continuous baking thyme, but in this case, he needs to provide not only a warm window sill but also additional lighting.

HOW TO GROW IN THE GARDEN Growing thyme in your own plot is not difficult. To do this, prepare seeds, cuttings, or divide the shrub. Active propagation by self-seeding should be taken into account, due to the need to deal with space constraints over time.

1.Thyme seeds Seeds can be sown in places carefully cleared of weeds. Since small seeds germinate within a month and develop very slowly, weeds interfere with this process. Therefore, planting thyme is best done by the seedling method. For this purpose, a mixture of sand and peat is prepared in early spring and poured into a box, tray, or container. After sowing, the seeds are kept under polyethylene or glass until the sprouts appear. Sprouts need regular moderate watering and good light. after 3-4 weeks, the stronger-looking plants are hardened in the open air for two weeks and then planted in a permanent growing place.

2.Thyme from cuttings In summer, propagate thyme from green cuttings. This method is characterized by successful rooting. The procedure is carried out before flowering. The top part of the stem should be cut to a height of 10 cm (3.93inch), placed in river sand, and covered with a piece of polyethylene. After a month, the rooted specimens can be planted in the open ground.

When dividing the shrub, pull the base apart and gently pull out the roots.

We recommend covering the slot with a glass jar for one week to promote rooting.

GROWING THYME A hardy and undemanding semi-shrub that can be cultivated without causing trouble to the gardener. Thyme grass adapts to the climatic conditions proposed and copes with a can-do attitude by forming spherical bushes and increasing its useful mass.

SITE AND SOIL SELECTION To grow thyme, it is necessary to choose a sunny and open place in the vegetable garden, but without draught. The soil should be neutral and well-drained. Heavy soils, clayey soils, and strongly moist soils need Gaza. For grass to thrive in the open ground, it should not be acidic and chalk or lime should be added. You need to consider the overall design of your garden so that the luxurious thyme weave blends harmoniously into the landscape.

WHEN AND HOW DO I PLANT THYME? Planting thyme seeds is done in autumn and spring after soaking in warm water for 12 hours. Smear the shoots, keeping 30cm (11.8inch) intervals. Seedlings are best planted after the end of frost on a warm, sunny day. Arrange a spacious hole. Remove the seedlings from the container and place them in a mixture of soil and sand. Compact the surface of the soil and water the plants afterward. In case of propagation by cuttings, planting is done in August. When thyme is grown from seed in the open ground, the semi-shrub will flower the following year. In Asia, the flavor of thyme is a must in lamb dishes in all countries. This spice is also an irreplaceable ingredient in French cuisine. Thyme is a genus of plants in the thyme family (Lamiaceae). The genus Thymus has a large number of species, including more than 350 species. More than 170 species of thyme can be found on the territory of Eastern Europe. Not all species are herbaceous, as they vary greatly in color and odor. Thyme is called Thymus vulgaris. In natural conditions, thyme grows on dry mountain slopes. So if grown in a home plot, it needs a sunny spot with plenty of light throughout the day. In the shade, or even in the penumbra, cultivars with unusually colored leaves lose this characteristic.

This plant looks like a compact shrub or semi-shrub up to 40cm (15.7inch) tall most commonly 15-20cm (5.9-7.87inch). The stems of thyme are woody, leafless, and recumbent or ascending. The herbaceous branches have small pointed leaflets that arise from the stems. The flowering branches are erect. It is a perennial plant. Thyme flowers from May to August. Its flowers are purple and pink, and there are also white-flowered varieties. Gardeners often use thyme as a decorative plant. With its help decorate irregular plots. It is now a permanent resident of the popular aromatic garden. The fruits of thyme are small, oval, smooth black, or dark brown nuts. Thyme has a slightly bitter and slightly spicy flavor with a pleasant and persistent aroma. Thyme branches and leaves are picked, dried, and crushed. After such preparation and proper storage, the spice does not lose its flavor for two years. This plant grows willingly on open ground and on windowsills. Thyme is a great bee and is indispensable where there is an apiary. It also attracts insects for pollination if some shrubs are planted near or in greenhouses.

SEEDS OF THYME To grow a spicy plant at home, you don't have to spend money on seedlings, which, by the way, are still very easy to find. It's much easier to use seeds. Potted thyme grows properly on a sunny balcony, as well as on a windowsill, with a system of regular ventilation.

THYME IS PERFECT FOR PLANTING ON WINDOWSILLS Action plan. 1. Prepare a small pot 15cm (5.9inch) deep. 2. Just cover the bottom with a 2cm (0.78inch) layer of drainage pipe. 3. Prepare the soil. Mix with vermiculite. 4. Wet the soil in the sprayer and place it on top of the drain. 5. Shade the pot until the first shoots appear. This will make the seedlings more robust and less likely to be burned in the sunlight. Thyme seeds germinate very well, so you can leave the strongest shoots to grow and discard the rest.

FIND A PLACE WHERE I BELONG Light, non-acidic soils are suitable for growing thyme. Soil reaction should be slightly alkaline, close to herbaceous. The soil should be well-drained, loose, and airy. Like most pungent plants, thyme is very demanding of light and is not afraid of direct sunlight. It grows in open, sunny areas. Thyme is a hardy plant. However, it does not like drafts and north winds. Therefore, thyme must be planted in a place that is sheltered from strong winds. You can place a thyme mini-planting garden behind a berry bush. Fertilizer is mainly organic. However, if you use manure, this organic matter is applied only in the fall under digging. In the spring, before planting, methane is introduced into the soil intended for thyme. Thyme does not tolerate "overwatering" and does not like to have standing water on its roots. This drought-tolerant plant does not require heavy watering. It only needs watering during periods of drought.

DISEASES AND PESTS The aromatic substances released by thyme in large quantities act as a good defense against pests. If not cared for according to good care instructions, it can trigger attacks by insects. Those that cause significant damage to the plant are. Straw bags, which damage the stems and leaves. Activated by warm nights. Insecticide treatments help. Sand bumblebees completely destroy the above-ground organs. Control them with poisonous baits. Weevil. Feed on young shoots and flower buds. Plants can be protected by insecticide treatment or by setting baits with poisonous preparations. Aphids damage the stems and leaves of thyme. It is not resistant to insecticides. Measures to prevent pests and parasites are regular loosening of the soil, timely removal of weeds, deep digging, and alkaline fertilization.

PLANTING CONDITIONS The thymus is propagated by seeds, seedlings, and cuttings. Even in our latitudes, it is possible to sow seeds directly in the open ground or in a greenhouse. The seeds are sown at a distance of 15-20cm (5.9-7.87inch) and in rows about 35cm (13.7inch) apart. The seeds are sown at a depth of 0.5cm (0.19inch). Seeds are sown in March, and seedlings are planted in the soil in early spring. Seeds are not soaked before sowing. Dry seeds are placed in the soil to a depth of about 1cm (0.39inch). When planting seedlings, take into account a row spacing of at least 45cm (17.7inch). You can propagate thyme by dividing the bushes (it is better to do it in spring). Thyme needs good care. Be prepared by regularly loosening the soil between the rows and directly around the bushes. Water on dry days and keep weeding. Especially important is the control of weeds during the bok choy harvesting activities to facilitate harvesting. At first, thyme development is less active. The first year requires constant and thorough weeding and loosening of the soil, as well as regular and moderate watering. Feeding in the first year is not done. In the second or third year, humus and mineral complex fertilizers are introduced into the soil. Planting thyme is recommended to be renewed after 3 to 4 years.

HOW TO GROW THYME AT HOME?

There are several common ways to grow thyme. When propagating the spice in the living room, it can be grown by cuttings or sowing seeds. To choose the best growing method for you, it is important to understand each growing method in detail.

1.Starting from seeds It is most common to grow spices from seeds, as it is relatively easy. To do this, pour soil mixed with vermiculite, which improves the moisture retention of the soil, into a pre-prepared container. Then water the soil in the container with warm water and make holes in the ground. Put 2-3 seeds in each hole and fill with soil. Transfer the planted plants to the windowsill and water them regularly. When the first buds appear in the pot, thin them for better growth.

2.Cuttings Some people like to propagate thyme bushes from cuttings. First, you need to get busy preparing the cuttings for planting. After the thyme has finished flowering, cut off the shoots from the bush and strip the leaves completely. Cut off the frequent shoots and take the cuttings and plant them in pots. Planting thyme cuttings in the ground is simple. To do this, the pot is completely filled with soil and a 1-2cm (0.39-0.78inch) deep depression is made in it. Then, put sprouts in the wells and cover them with soil. The planted cuttings are watered within 1-2 days until the first leaves appear.

3.Time for harvesting cuttings. Leaves and shoots should be harvested several times during the growing season. Shoots are cut at 5cm (1.96inch) from the ground. After that, the plants are fed. As a spice for cooking, the main harvesting time for the tops is at the end of June and July. The flowering shoots are used for medicinal purposes. Thyme seeds are harvested from two to three-year-old plants. The seeds are mature when they turn brown. Thyme is placed in a cool place, spread on a clean cloth or paper, and dried naturally.

4.Siting of indoor thyme Some inexperienced housewives pay little attention to choosing a suitable planting location because they believe that the spice will grow in any room. However, this is not the case, so you should familiarize yourself with the peculiarities of choosing the best place to grow thyme.

5.Lighting Thyme is considered a light-loving plant that grows best in the presence of sunlight. It is recommended to place the pot with the plant on a sunny windowsill. If growing spices in winter, take care to increase lighting and install special lamps.

6.Temperature and air humidity Thyme grows better in a cool room with air temperatures no higher than 20°C (68°F) hot. In autumn, you can take the pots to the glazed balcony during the day and bring them into the apartment only in the evening, after the sun has set. In wintertime, you cannot take the spices to the balcony because the low temperature will kill them.

#ThumbGarden #GardeningTips #Herb #Herbal #Thyme #HerbGarden #Garden #HowToGrow #Best #Sprouting #Germination #Seeds #SmallSpaces #Pests #Harvest #Fertilize #Soils #Watering #Pruning #PlantCare #Care

Author: Ms.Geneva Link: https://www.thumbgarden.com/how-to-grow-thyme-in-a-pot/ Source: ThumbGarden The copyright belongs to the author. For commercial reprints, please contact the author for authorization, and for non-commercial reprints, please indicate the source.

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hxroic-wxlls · 2 years

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A Race Against Death: Chapter 1; The Search Begins, Return to the Dream World!

(Mario’s Side)

Having explored all regions of the Mushroom Kingdom Bean Bean Kingdom, Sarasa, and even Bowser’s kingdom, it seems like the Plumber was still no closer to figuring out a way how to make a cure for the heart virus. Ugh...this was bad. He explored everywhere he could, here, already... Just who could he ask for help? Neither Peach nor Daisy seemed to be able to find a means of curing this virus, and even Bowser was incapable of thinking of a viable solution, which was quite a blow to the Koopa King’s pride...

Well...actually...there was one option left. The guardians of the dream depot. Using the emergency pipe hidden behind his house, the plumber made his way to the sacred place where the Star Spirits resided.

...

“Thank you so much! You guys are the best, I promise I won’t let this knowledge go to waste.”

Finally, he had a lead! It turns out, the virus was no ordinary virus. It was a virus born of an unknown yet otherworldly force. Trying to cure it through natural means would’ve done no good. The only way to cure a virus of this caliber was to bring to the Star Spirits multiple magical items from different worlds. By mixing together the power of the multiple magical items, the Star Spirits would be capable of mixing a miracle cure, capable of healing the deadly disease that was currently tearing away at the Gardener’s health.

For the items listed, it seems like there were four items in particular they would need:

1: A feather from the Zeekeeper 2: A Fairy’s Wing 3: A Dragon’s Tear 4: An Ancient Genie’s Lamp

...

Having relayed the information of the required items to the others, the plumber would focus on acquiring a feather from the Zeekeeper. Hmm...now then, it looks like he and Luigi were due for another adventure through the Pi’ilow Kingdom.

...

After getting his bro come along and return to the familiar kingdom of dreams, it looks like the two were finally ready to make their grand return to the Dream World. Managing to acquire Prince Dreambert’s help once again, the two dived deep into the world of dreams, before encountering the Zeekeeper

...

Sure, it may have taken quite a bit of convincing, another giant battle between his bro and the Zeekeeper, and yet another promise of unreasonable monetary payments, but they finally managed to grab themselves a feather!

“Thanks again, bro. You really are the best!”

...

Returning back to the Star Spirits the plumber would deliver to them the first ingredient of the miracle cure. Now then...the only thing left to do was to leave it up to the others to grab the other three ingredients.

#{story arc: a race against death}#{Let's'a go: ic}

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cullen-collective · 3 years

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(teamjacobthot) fic prompt: it’s quil and embry’s turn to cook sunday dinner for the pack and they still don’t know what to make

Thanks for this @teamjacobthot! It was a fun one! <3

They were ready. Side by side in the borrowed car, they broke nearly every traffic law as they hurtled toward their destination. Their mission was of the utmost importance, and it required that they stay focused, alert, and above all, fast. The car skidded to a stop, tires squealing on the pavement, and Embry turned to Quil, hands shaking on the wheel.

“Are you ready?” he asked, swallowing hard.

Quil nodded, looking a little pale. “As I’ll ever be.”

They thrust the doors open, and Embry got caught on the seatbelt as he tried to exit the vehicle, nearly falling out onto the asphalt, which caused Quil to burst out into hysterics. He hastily undid the buckle and stormed out of the car, flipping Quil the bird as he marched toward the Safeway.

“It’s not going to be nearly as funny when the guys tear us limb from limb for coming home empty-handed,” he said when Quil caught up to him. The other boy’s leftover giggles went silent. Time to focus on the mission: dinner.

The pack got together, rain, shine, or other, every Sunday night for dinner. Emily and Sam used to host every week, until Jared and Kim moved in together and wanted to do it occasionally. And then Paul had gotten his own place, and then Embry and Quil got their tiny apartment, and then Collin and his boyfriend, and Seth and Jacob shared a house with Leah, and everyone had scattered all over the rez. So they rotated, and tonight’s meal was up to Embry and Quil.

Usually they were much more prepared for this, what with Quil being the culinary genius he was, and Embry limping along beside him with his high school level hospitality class. But Quil had spent all week in Arizona on Tribal Council business, and hadn’t prepared anything; and Embry pretty much relied on him to know how many calories and food groups and whatever else they all needed. Embry was mostly good at appetizers.

They wandered through the grocery store, with Embry occasionally pointing to random ingredients and Quil waving him off.

“No, we don’t have enough time for me to make lasagna,” he said, sighing deeply.

Embry shrugged. “The frozen one only takes forty minutes.”

Quil looked like he’d been slapped across the face with a white glove. “The fact that you could suggest that to me at all is rank, dude.”

Embry held up his hands in surrender. “I’m just saying, if we needed more time, we should have come earlier.”

“Yeah, well, you needed a swift kick in the ass and Mortal Kombat wasn’t going to play itself.”

“But I won most rounds,” Embry pointed out.

“Irrelevant,” Quil said, still strolling through the aisles.

They meandered around, growing more and more panicked as the time everyone was supposed to arrive loomed closer and closer, and the frozen lasagna started looking incredibly appealing. It came to a point where Embry was putting things in the cart and Quil was removing them. They got into a shouting match in the vegetable aisle, Embry insisting that no one wanted to eat a cauliflower pizza, and Quil gathering bunches of the stuff anyway. A store employee had to come and tell them to be quiet.

“Dude, we have to find something. They’re coming in like, an hour.”

“I know! You don’t think I know?”

“You’ve rejected any viable option and tried to feed a bunch of hungry wolves cauliflower as an entrée.”

“I just haven’t seen the right thing. It’ll come to me.”

Embry seriously doubted that.

Until they came upon the seafood counter. Quil walked up to it reverently. “Embry, Embry, Embry, come here. Do you see that?”

He was pointing at a little sign on the glass.

Crab Legs, 2 for 1!

“Do you know what this means?” Quil asked, his voice filled with joy.

Embry’s brows knitted. “Bad shellfish?”

Quil punched him in the arm, which made Embry growl and tenderly run the sore spot.

“It means we’re having a freaking boil, dude.”

Half an hour, forty bucks, and several missed stop signs later, Quil unlocked the door to their apartment and immediately began bustling around the kitchen, demanding that Embry bring him things from the grocery bags and directing him to make crudite that people could dip in the sauce. Embry, to his credit, just got busy doing as he was asked, instead of calling Quil a crazy Gordon Ramsey wannabe, like he wanted to.

There was oil, lemon, thyme, parsley, paprika, cumin, allspice, cayenne, salt, onion, garlic, and dismembered shellfish everywhere. It was an absolute nightmare in the cramped kitchen, as Embry scooted behind Quil to put the toast points (his own personal addition) in the oven to toast. The crudite was all cut and lightly brushed with olive oil, and he decided to start cleaning up the mess Quil was making as he cooked.

There was a knock on the door as he threw away the last of the shrimp shells and veins.

“Hey, man,” Seth said, not waiting for an invite in when Embry opened the door, opting instead to head straight for the living room. “It smells great in here.”

Jake and Leah trailed in behind him, Jake bearing the traditional two-buck chuck, and Leah with a tequila bottle. Oh, so it was going to be one of those nights.

“What’s cooking?” she asked, setting the bottle on the table and leaning onto the kitchen counter.

“A cajun seafood boil with crab legs, scallops, shrimp, potatoes, sausage, and corn on the cob.” Quil didn’t even look up from where he was stirring as he spoke. He took a spoon and dipped it in the sauce, coating the back of it. He took a quick taste, and then started adjusting spices.

Jacob’s eyes raised. “How does he always make the best stuff?” he asked.

Embry thought back to their panicked run through the store, the potential cauliflower disaster, and the heavily discounted crab legs.

“Divine intervention.”

#wolf pack #embry call #Quil Ateara #jacob black #leah clearwater #seth clearwater #sunday dinner hell yeah they're gonna be a FAMILY #asks #answered #prompts #teamjacobthot #the dish was fully inspired by A. the pnw probably having good seafood and B. my obsession with the boiling crab in dt ontario

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architectnews · 3 years

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"Taking credit for trees planted elsewhere is a whole lot of embodied irony"

Architecture firm Perkins&Will has gone too far with claims that a luxury timber home on a Canadian mountain removes more atmospheric carbon than it emits, argues Fred A Bernstein.

For much of last winter, Perkins&Will, an architecture firm with 25 offices from San Francisco to Singapore to Sao Paulo, used a photo of a wooden house in British Columbia as one of the "hero images" on its website.

The house, which sits alone on a mountaintop overlooking the Soo Valley 90 miles north of Vancouver, is certainly beautiful, but the firm had other reasons for splashing it across its homepage. The 321-square-metre dwelling, known as the SoLo House, is meant to be a model of sustainability.

Entirely off the grid, it is designed to operate with power from 103 solar panels on its south facade, a 96-kilowatt-hour battery pack to store electricity for nights and cloudy days (both of which are frequent in British Columbia), and a hydrogen fuel cell for winter.

With all that equipment, the house may well be able to function without utility hook-ups. But Perkins&Will has made a far more surprising and audacious claim: that the building's structure is "beyond carbon neutral," meaning that it will remove more carbon from the atmosphere than it emitted in the first place.

It seemed to be giving its clients permission to build willy-nilly at a time of climate crisis

In a slickly produced video on the firm's website, Perkins&Will architect Alysia Baldwin says the house "proves that buildings can counteract their negative consequences and act as a source of repair."

People listen to Perkins&Will, a firm that has positioned itself as a leader in green building. "For nearly a quarter of a century, we've been at the vanguard of the sustainability movement," its website declares. Journalists have tended to repeat its claims.

But this time it had gone too far. By constructing a showplace of a house on an otherwise pristine mountaintop, and claiming it had helped the environment by doing so, it seemed to be giving its clients permission to build willy-nilly at a time of climate crisis.

Looking at SoLo House, with its cathedral ceilings, its comfortable sectional sofas and its giant picture windows, then listening to Perkins&Will claim that its structure reduces atmospheric carbon, I'm reminded of the old punchline: "Who are you going to believe – me, or your lying eyes?"

Reducing a building's contribution to atmospheric carbon means making it small, keeping it simple, building it near existing infrastructure, avoiding the need for heavy equipment such as batteries and fuel cells and using the lowest-embodied-energy building materials.

Reducing a building's contribution to atmospheric carbon means making it small

Perkins&Will, normally an excellent firm, has done those things on other projects. But with SoLo House, it seems not to have even tried.

According to experts, 40 per cent of atmospheric greenhouse gases come from buildings. Some emissions are attributable to running appliances and systems – so-called operational energy. The rest comes from the power needed to produce the building in the first place, known as embodied energy.

Incredibly, Perkins&Will is claiming there is "no embodied energy" in the house's structure (by which it means the elements that keep the building standing). To its credit, the firm answered requests for information promptly, providing facts, figures and charts prepared by Baldwin and her colleague Cillian Collins, a senior architect.

Here's how Baldwin and Collins arrived at their no-embodied-energy claim: First they estimated the amount of structural wood, steel and concrete in SoLo House. And then they turned to Athena Impact Estimator for Buildings, an app that approximates the amount of energy needed to produce given amounts of each building material and the amount of carbon released into the atmosphere as a result of that energy use.

Athena told them that producing the steel and concrete, harvesting the wood and so on in SoLo House released 122 tonnes of CO2 (sometimes called CO2e, for CO2 and its equivalents) into the atmosphere.

That should have been the beginning – not the end – of the process of calculating the building's embodied energy. There are hundreds of other items that needed to be counted. Start with the roof. The walls. The windows (a massive item, given the need for triple glazing). The solar panels, the batteries, the hydrogen fuel cells. The furniture. The appliances. The plumbing. The heating and cooling systems. Lots and lots of insulation.

The list goes on. Each of those items has significant embodied energy. Transporting all of those materials to a remote mountaintop site adds more.

Perkins&Will failed to account for those sources of embodied energy. Baldwin was clear, in a letter to me, that the calculations were limited to the structure. But why would anyone stop there? According to Baldwin, it's because structure "represents the largest contribution to a typical building's embodied carbon impacts."

It may also be because Athena only applies to structure. (Athena is meant primarily for comparing how the choice of a structural material affects a building's embodied energy. An architect might enter plans for the same building, once with a concrete frame and once with a steel frame, and see how the embodied carbon figures differ.)

Of course, there are other ways to estimate the house's total embodied energy; one method is to use an online tool called Tally, which provides information on the embodied energy of numerous building components. Counting everything isn't easy, but other firms have done it.

Perkins&Will had a way of making it vanish, if not from the atmosphere then from the balance sheet

Even so, according to Athena, the house emitted 122 tonnes of carbon into the atmosphere. That sounds like a lot of carbon, but Perkins&Will had a way of making it vanish, if not from the atmosphere then from the balance sheet.

Much of SoLo House is made of wood. Wood, like all plants, is produced by photosynthesis from ingredients that include carbon dioxide. Thus trees are said to store (or sequester) carbon. They do, but probably not as much as people think, as I learned by studying the question at length.

Here's Perkins&Will's theory: If you cut down a tree and use the wood as a building material, that carbon sequestered in that tree becomes part of the building. Then, if you plant a new tree in place of the one you cut down, the new tree will sequester additional carbon as it grows. Thus the process (cutting down one tree, planting another) results, net-net, in carbon being removed from the atmosphere.

There are so many problems with that theory it's hard to know where to begin. To name a few:

1) You have to be sure a new tree will be planted in place of the one you cut down; will get to be as big as the one you cut down; and will live a long, healthy life. (If a tree burns, or decomposes, as billions of trees do every year, its embodied carbon is released right into the atmosphere.)

2) You can't waste any of the wood. That's a problem because converting a tree into lumber usually turns half the wood into sawdust or chips, which could end up being burnt or allowed to decompose. This problem alone suggests carbon sequestration figures should be cut in half.

3) The wood has to stay in or on the building for a very long time. If the building needs repairs, and lumber is removed, it may be recycled, but it may also be burnt or allowed to decompose. And who'll be watching in 20 or 50 years?

4) Let's be honest: You could have planted the new tree somewhere else, and not cut down the first tree to begin with. For that reason, no number of trees excuses a wasteful building.

5) Even if the new trees do sequester carbon, the process will take decades. Scientists who study global warming warn of tipping points and thresholds, some of which could be reached within the next ten years. If new buildings help push atmospheric carbon levels to a point of no return, the sequestration accomplished by newly planted trees will be too little, too late.

6) It's a logical impossibility. If you really believe SoLo House repairs the atmosphere, all you have to do is build enough SoLo Houses and climate change will go away. Now for our next trick ...

No number of trees excuses a wasteful building

No wonder the theory is highly controversial. A whole lot of things have to happen just right for it to become a reality. As Baldwin wrote in an email: "We acknowledge that not all timber sources perform equally in the realm of embodied carbon reduction."

"Much of the embodied carbon reduction achieved by timber is directly attributed to sustainable forestry management practices that ensure forestry operations are carried out in a way that allows forests to remain healthy and viable for future generations," she added. "These practices include conservation and protection, land use planning, regulation of timber harvesting, establishing practices to ensure forest regrow, and continuous monitoring and reporting to government."

She went on to admit that the tool used to determine the building's sequestered carbon, WoodWorks Carbon Calculator, a product of the Washington-based Wood Products Council, considers "much of this storage to be temporary and therefore [does] not give the building a carbon credit for the carbon dioxide that will eventually be released from this wood some time down the road, through decay or incineration."

But that didn't stop the firm from banking on the theory when it performed its embodied energy calculation. Using the Carbon Calculator, it determined that the amount of lumber in the building would result in the removal – through the planting of new trees – of 145 tonnes of carbon from the atmosphere. That's a bit more than the 122 tonnes the firm says the building's timber, concrete, and steel released into the atmosphere.

Converting a tree into lumber usually turns half the wood into sawdust or chips

So in this case, reducing E (embodied carbon) by S (sequestered carbon) produces a negative number – minus 22 tonnes, meaning that building the house decreased the amount of carbon in the atmosphere. (Indeed, the house's owner, Delta Land Development, refers to it as "climate positive.")

Perkins & Will firm produced a chart to make this clear:

As Baldwin puts it, SoLo House "is able to store more carbon in its structure than was released during the production, manufacturing, and construction of the project."

That's a highly suspect statement. Based on everything I've learned, E (embodied energy) may be much greater than Perkins&Will says it is, and S (sequestered carbon) much lower.

In a letter responding to points in this article prior to publication, Perkins&Will wrote the following (the client, Delta Land Development, did not respond to requests for comment):

"Through careful selection of low embodied carbon and locally sourced materials, the project prioritized a mass timber structure. The design team used industry-accepted LCA [life cycle assessment] tools to quantify the carbon sequestration potential of the structure, and the timber structure is modelled to sequester 145 tonnes of CO2e as biogenic carbon."

Reusing/recycling is always the greenest strategy

"Structural elements typically represent the largest embodied carbon profile of [a] project, and as such, the structure was prioritized from an embodied carbon perspective."

"As designers, we rely on reputable industry tools to estimate the impact of projects. We used the Athena Impact Estimator for Buildings to complete this assessment. Athena uses ongoing research by the Athena Institute and complies with ISO 14040 (environmental management, life cycle assessment, and principles and framework) and ISO 14044 (environmental management, life cycle assessment, and requirements and guidelines)."

"Per our previous correspondence, we shared the Athena Institute's definition of biogenic sequestered carbon, which considers the whole life cycle of the material, including extraction, manufacturing, forms of transportation, installation, repair and maintenance, and end of life (assuming reuse of the wood)."

However, if Perkins and Will had really wanted to reduce embodied carbon, it would have thought about some of these strategies:

1) Putting the house in an easily accessible location, thus cutting out hundreds or thousands of trips by delivery people and construction workers. (Perkins&Will points out "that the wood was sourced from within British Columbia, and the building panels were manufactured in Pemberton, BC, which is located 30 minutes from the site.")

2) Renovating an existing house. Reusing/recycling is always the greenest strategy. Renovation typically generates 50 to 75 per cent less atmospheric carbon than new construction.

3) Choosing a site where there are no trees to cut down. According to Perkins&Will, "A clearing was required for a driveway, solar access, and fire protection. It required harvesting 180m³ of second-growth hemlock timber. This wood was put into the BC forestry chain, becoming useful lumber." Taking credit for sequestration by trees that may have been planted elsewhere, while cutting down enough trees on site to fill a five-meter by six-meter by six-meter container, is a whole lot of embodied irony.

4) Making the house a lot smaller. When it comes to saving energy, less is definitely more.

5) Choosing versions of steel and concrete with the lowest embodied energy (a lot of research is being done on ways of making those materials less "carbon-intensive").

Perkins&Will appears not to have done these things — the actual work required to reduce carbon emissions. The danger is that people will believe its claims.

Fred A Bernstein studied architecture at Princeton and law at NYU and writes about both subjects. He has published articles about embodied energy – a significant component of the climate crisis – in Oculus (a primer), in Architect Magazine (an admonition to architecture critics) and in the Architect's Newspaper (a warning that efforts to make buildings resilient are often detrimental from an embodied energy standpoint).

Carbon revolution

This article is part of Dezeen's carbon revolution series, which explores how this miracle material could be removed from the atmosphere and put to use on earth. Read all the content at: www.dezeen.com/carbon.

The sky photograph used in the carbon revolution graphic is by Taylor van Riper via Unsplash.

The post "Taking credit for trees planted elsewhere is a whole lot of embodied irony" appeared first on Dezeen.

#Architecture – Dezeen

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fandomrecycling · 3 years

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Pax and her Potions: Prt 3/3

Part 1 & Part 2 @anxiousworm @vlanderzine yeet this is kinda long and I don’t regret it

Pax clung to the unburnt material of her cloak and tried her best to mute her crying. The pain hadn’t dulled and the smell was festering in the tight space she was buried under. Pushing herself up as much as she could, she listened for the whining-wail of the ghast that nearly blew her up.

Digging herself out with shaking hands, she coughed and spat out a mix of spit and coagulated ashes. Gingerly probing her back as she walked, Pax traced the edges of her burn. It was big, about the size of both her hands, spreading the width of her right shoulder blade. She did her best to hide the injury and make it look like there wasn’t a charred hole in her clothes.

Climbing back up the netherrack mountains and avoiding the piglin patrols ached. The sudden awareness of time also started chewing away at her.

Space in the Nether was a screwy concept Pax had only the barest idea of how it worked. Time was another factor entirely. She berated herself all the while as she backtracked to her tunnel, silently regretting ever choosing to jump into this hell as literally as possible.

Shuffling her hands around her midsection, her fingers bumped into the nether wart. Her train of self-loathing paused for a moment as she rubbed against the smooth texture of the forgien plant. Out of impulse, Pax tore off a bit and popped it into her mouth.

The flavour was surprisingly not terrible. It was some mix of sour-spicy and juicer than she expected from a plant that grew around lava pits and fire monsters. Even the aftertaste was tolerable. Pax wasn’t sure if that meant she was weird, or something else.

Finally coming upon her tunnel, she began her climb down and was filled with relief at the thought of being able to go to bed. Then, after hearing the sound of pickaxes beneath her, another moment of self realization hit her.

She’d thought of a way through the portal, but she hadn’t considered a way out. Thinking harder about it, the guards would be stationed by the portal and she didn’t know their shifts. So if she did go through, there’d be no easy way to escape.

“Fuck,” She hissed. She wanted to scream so badly, the urge clogged her throat.

Pax beat her frustration into the ground, punching and crumbling the sandy red stone under her fist. More bruises would form and some small, logical part of her said getting more injuries wouldn’t help. She ignored it until she worried that a knuckle would split.

Dropping her head between her legs, she sat at the mouth of her makeshift tunnel and tried to consider her options. Staying in the Nether was not viable and going home would mean facing her parents and whatever reaction they’d have to her. Pax laughed to herself, pushing up her sweaty hair and started to climb back down the tunnel.

The other miners in the main tunnel didn’t notice her - she pulled up her hood to keep them from recognizing her too - and most were solely focused on mining the quartz used to build the redstone components the engineers relied so heavily on.

That sparked the inkling of an idea. As Pax made her way back to the portal, she found a small vein and chipped away at some small fragments. Her pockets were stuffed to the brim but she managed to make room.

Shuffling down to the hub, a steady stream of workers and guards made their way through from the overworld portal. Most didn’t look too dissimilar from her, with ashy pants and faces from their time in this dimension. She kept her pickaxe hanging by her side to try and look like one of them as she shuffled through the crowd.

The sunlight was harsher than she expected on her eyes. Bringing up one hand to block her face, Pax realized with a startling fear that the sun was up.

“Hey, you there!” One of the guards called out. “Don’t move!”

Pax didn’t - running would’ve been futile - but still flinched when they turned to look at her face.

“Have you seen - Miss Valora?” He startled. “You - you’re here? Your parents are worried sick, come, I’ll call for an escort to your residence.”

“Sure.”

The march back felt more like a funeral procession to the wannabe alchemist. People pointed at her as she walked, Pax could imagine all the terrible rumors that would spill from this incident. No doubt her parents reputation would drop and any she had left would crumble to dust.

Cynicism drenched her mind as they came upon the street her house was built on. It wasn’t as if she cared what people thought of her and it wasn’t like they cared about her. Pax made a bet with herself on whether or not she’d be yelled at for leaving her room or causing a disturbance first.

“Miss Valora! Where were you! We had the entire city searching for you, this sort of teenage rebellion is idiotic. You’ve made yourself look like a fool!”

Flinching at the sound of her mother crying out, Pax shuffled into the doorway and kept at arm's length from both parents.

“Couldn’t find the materials for the farm. So I just went out and got ‘em.” She lied.

“Well why didn’t you just go into the markets? Why did you have to go into the Nether! You aren’t allowed to be by yourself in such a dangerous place at all!”

Pax rolled her eyes. “I probably shouldn’t be up till sunrise working on machines that aren’t broken, but we don’t always get what we want.”

“That was for you to learn! We both explained everything and you didn’t listen. Do you want us to yell at you?”

“Sure,” Pax forced her voice neutral. Her lip still twitched, “I’m gonna go change.”

She didn’t run up the stairs, but she could tell her parents were still behind her and intending on lecturing her. Pulling the door open and hastily throwing it shut, she frantically searched her room for something to barricade her door. A flash of impulse told her to just jump out the window and make a break for it.

Finally, when she heard her parents' footsteps pause by her bedroom and finally descend down the stairs, Pax collapsed to her knees and tore off her burned clothes.

“Didn’t even realize it,” she laughed with bitter satisfaction, “you didn’t even fucking notice. And they call me the idiot.”

Grabbing a spare water bottle to try and wash down the ashy taste in her mouth, Pax grabbed a small pair of shears and began cutting away the ruined cloak to make bandages. She cleaned off the wound as long as she could tolerate and finished wrapping her back.

Sorting through the resources she gathered, she tossed aside the quartz and dumped all of her new ingredients onto her desk.

The orange-slime thing the piglin gave her looked exciting, so Pax began with that. Under the morning light, she ran through all the steps of preparing the brewing stand before finally adding the nether wart. Watching it filter into the water filled her with the same mix of dread and glee exploring the Nether gave her.

Once it was finally gone, Pax was surprised to see that the water didn’t look that changed. There was a very, very slight, opaqueness to the liquid and the sense that something was different. Pax decided to trust her intuition.

Gathering a clump of the orange slime, the amature alchemist sucked in a breath and poured it into the brewing stand.

“Please work, please, please, please work for me just this once,” She begged, “don’t let this be a waste.”

It felt like hours were ticking by as she watched the water bubble in the glass bottles. Her fingers picked at her arms, nearly breaking skin from anxiety that crawled across her body.

She hardly believed it when the water turned a shimmering, rich amber.

“No way,” Pax’s eyes lit up.

Gingerly, she pulled the glass bottle free. The liquid was glowing, there was no mistaking it. Clapping one hand over her mouth, Pax could feel more tears running down her cheeks. Happy hiccuping noises filled her throat and she had to stop herself from dancing around her bedroom.

She didn’t even hesitate to swallow the entire contents. The spice was unexpected and the flavor burned deliciously down her throat. Pax relished in the sudden pulse of warmth through her body and the tingle of magic running through her veins. There was an effect, now it was just a matter of figuring out what.

That could come later, she jotted down that combination in her notebook and switched in a new bottle.

Pax blended together all the ingredients she could find; golden carrots, leaves, redstone, sugar, gold nuggets, anything and everything she could find stashed away in her room.

The orange potion, she realized, was a form of fire immunity when she ran into a torch and it didn’t leave a burn. The silvery-blue mix left her feeling hyper and charged with energy. When she mixed up her ingredients with extra blaze powder for the brewing stand, the mix left her feeling like she could fist fight a zombie horde and win. The one she accidentally dropped a golden carrot into cleared her vision and allowed her to see perfectly in the dim evening light.

It was only when Pax had ran out of clean bottles and all but the night vision had worn off did she relax against her bed.

“I actually did it,” she said to herself, “I actually did it. This worked, I did this. I did this.”

An immense feeling of pride rose in her. Then, after a pause, anger.

“Call me stupid now,” Pax scoffed.

She broke out into laughter bordering on hysterics. Her vision was sharpened beyond any normal senses, her thin muscles ripped with adrenaline and her entire body was immune to fire. No machine could accomplish this, no set of redstone and repeaters could grant this kind of power.

This was a lost innovation she’d rediscovered all on her own. Pax wondered what her parents would say about it.

Pax considered it. She’d done research, kept notes, and did all the things engineers did. Just with magic instead of redstone. And there could be practical uses for this; keeping miners in the Nether safe, helping people working in the low light mob farms, all manner of things.

The idea of being able to help others, combined with the hope of making her parents proud made for a compelling argument. But just to be safe, Pax hid away her brewing stand ard her notes, taking one of her fire resistance potions down with her as proof.

She’d ignored the call to dinner, but now she climbed down the stairs with her heart pounding against her chest. The table was silent, but the sounds of utensils on plates paused when she came down.

“So, there’s something I’ve been working on.” Pax muttered.

“I couldn’t hear that,” Her mother snipped.

“Speak up,” Her father ordered, “you know you shouldn’t mumble.”

Breathing out, she nodded, “I was working on a project in my free time. I finally had a breakthrough… and… I dunno, I thought you would want to know.”

Her hands were shaking as she pulled out the bottle and set it on the table. Both her parents stared at it, expressions unreadable.

“I-it’s a fire resistance potion. Like the ones from the stories, but it works I swear,” She started to ramble, “I took one and I fell into a torch but it didn’t burn me and I think if you fell in lava like in the cobblestone generators it’d be helpful to those working in them and prevent injuries and - “

Her mother pushed herself out of her chair and glared down at her, “This is what you’ve been doing? Is this why you tried to sneak out last night?”

“Y-yes but I promise it’ll be important. I can make more and I can - “

“This is what you’ve been wasting your time on?”

Glass shattered as Pax watched the bottle shatter across the floor.

“You idiot! You have so many opportunities and you’re wasting all of them! Me and your father have given you every chance to learn and you refuse every time! It’s like you want us to be mad at you, is that it?”

“It’s not!” Pax sobbed, “I don’t want this! I don’t want you to be mad at me! Do you seriously think I want this?”

“Then why don’t you listen to your mother?” Her father added, arms crossed with vague disappointment.

“I do! I swear I was really trying. I wasn’t being lazy!”

“Then why aren’t you better? If you really want to be better, then why aren’t you working to be better?” Her mother yelled back.

“Well maybe I’m just a fucking idiot then!”

Pax sprinted back up to her room. This time, she shoved her entire bed against the door. Eyes blurry, she ran to grab all her belongings and stuffed them into a bag and her pockets. Outside, it began to rain.

The wall she’d broken the night before was still loose.

She threw herself into the branches of the nearby tree, then downed one of her swiftness potions and made a break for the gates.

Guards stationed by the entrance noticed her approach. Pax barreled past then, throwing off their arms as she pushed towards the wilderness. Her vision was still saturated, and along with her tears, it gave everything she saw a blurry, dream like quality.

She couldn’t remember how long she ran for. When her legs finally started to cramp and the cold started seeping through her clothes.

Gasping for air and whipping her dripping nose, Pax looked up to her surroundings. Through the trees, she could see stars in the deep navy sky. Her vision flickered and everything went dark for a perilous moment.

She was cold, terrified and exhausted. The alchemist robotically ordered herself to find shelter and she started wandering deeper into the woods.

There wasn’t much that looked like shelter. But ‘shelter’ to Pax always looked like four walls and a roof. Before her potion effects faded, she spotted an entrance to a small tunnel and the faint light of a torch.

She nearly slipped on the stone as she made her way down. Oddly, Pax noticed that the torch was made from redstone. Shrugging off her wet cloak, she couldn’t find the energy to care about that anomaly.

Resting her shoulder against the perfectly smooth - were they supposed to be smooth? - walls of the cave, Pax rolled one of her potions between her fingers and listened to the patter of rain.

#minecraft #minecraft oc #mcoc trio #man I got invested in this #pax honey you don’t deserve this at all

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yoongisbars · 4 years

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Samusil | myg | P R O L O G U E

summary: It was always known that you were the family disappointment. So naturally, you fled. With a looming school debt, alcoholic tendencies, and no luck whatsoever in keeping a job for more than a month, you were at your wits end until you finally cave into working at Bang-Lenzo. You’ve only ever heard horrors of the place and its manager. But maybe, just maybe, that office would become your safe haven.

pairing: myg x reader genre: strangers to lovers au | office!yoongi au | future angst? fluff? word count: 7.5k tw: alcohol as coping mechanism, subjects that might hit close to home note: inspired by The Office US, this is only a teaser, a taste, of a project im working on, i wont release anything besides this until its ready, so pls endure !! <3

Life was a bitch to everyone, and ever since you flunked out of Business School, it’s proven you weren’t the exception. It was an already supersaturated field with bright minded, innovative entrepreneurs. And you? Realized halfway through that the business world wasn’t cut out for you. With an overwhelmingly expensive college debt for an unfinished degree that your parents refused to pay for, you became the official family disappointment. After two years of being done with their bullshit, you finally packed your stuff and moved as far away as possible, hoping to start anew in the small town of rural Yangpiji.

Just because you had some level of education, didn’t mean it would get you quite far. It’s done the opposite, in fact. Jobs with higher wages frowned upon your incomplete studies, and jobs that didn’t give a fuck if you finished high school, didn’t pay enough to deal with their idiocies or take care of the bills for that matter. One heated argument with the owner of the last food joint you worked at was the final straw. Throwing your dirty apron at his face, you walked out of there without a single care in the world, and for the moment, you felt powerful. At least until you waltzed into Slack Jack’s and sat at the bar that night, head buried into your palms.

“Rough shift?” Your eyes peered from behind your fingers, focusing on a shot being placed in front of you. And boy, were you thankful for it. Without speaking, you threw that shit back and let it burn your throat, the only consolation for the situation you were in. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“Jackson, I quit.” Feigned shock played on the bartender’s face as he cleaned a beer mug. You weren’t the only one who searched for new beginnings in Yangpiji. In front of you was Jackson Wang, owner and proprietor of Slack Jack’s. He had moved there from abroad no more than ten years ago in hopes to reinvent himself, and against all odds did. He had been your close friend for the past three years since moving. Quite frankly the only good thing this area had to offer was Jackson and his cheap drinks that get you hammered quick.

“Really? I wouldn’t have thought!” His hand shot up to cover his mouth, chuckling at your bland reaction. Rolling your eyes so far into your skull, a heavy sigh escaped from within.

“I’m serious. I quit. I quit work, I quit life, I quit Yangpiji- I’m tired… I hate that I’m a jobless 28-year-old drunk, with nothing to offer this world besides how to survive on garlic noodles and rum.” Your hands traveled the air around you as you searched for words, “I can’t even afford to make them Jjajang Noodles, Jack. JJAJANG!” A small shriek spewed out as you downed another shot, you stopped counting after the third one. Dread and sorrow pooled around you in a matter of seconds. You were at your wits end. And you couldn’t say you were past your peak, since frankly you never took off the ground to begin with. “I’m a failure, Jackson.”

Widened eyes traveled the room trying to find any words of consolation, but the bartender couldn’t find anything other than pity. His hands moved quickly, putting away the bottles before he was tempted to offer you anymore. He usually served you on the house because he knew of your struggles, but you also drank your weight in alcohol, and he didn’t want to go broke any time soon.

“Listen, chief. There’s still an option…” Oh no… You didn’t want to hear it; already knowing what was coming. “The Bang-Lenzo Yangpiji Branch is still hiring for a secretary; you should test it out.”

Ah, yes. Bang-Lenzo Inc. Somehow a successful company in the dying paper industry. One of the first to drop their deforestation contracts for their supplies and switch entirely to recycled paper. Since most companies didn’t believe in the Save The Trees movement, most of their major clients dropped them and signed contracts with Bang-Lenzo instead. Working for them would be an achievement… If only the branch in your city wasn’t a nut house.

“Jackson…” Elongating the last syllable, you groaned. “I’ve heard horror stories of people that have tried to work there, it’s chaos. No one ever lasts a full week…” The idea of even bothering to work there was dreadful. The workers there were a nightmare, so you’ve heard. But their manager? A complete lunatic. Unprofessional, immature, inappropriate, and other negative connotations have been used to describe the young manager, Jeon Jungkook. Rumor had it he was the top salesman for 4 years straight before the old manager died. When the company crunched the numbers and stats, he was technically the most qualified for the manager position and had managed to keep it for the past 5 years.

Amidst your internal struggle, Jackson raised an eyebrow and cut you straight. “It pays $15 an hour, plus benefits.” On instinct your hand shot up, doing quick maths in the air. Holy cow. You shifted your attention to Jackson so fast you almost snapped your neck.

“That’s almost $30k a year!”

“More than you’ll ever make busing tables, that’s for sure.” He had a point. And, you were desperate. Maybe not so much at first, but $15 is $15 and if it meant sacrificing your sanity for survival, well damn it, you were down for the count.

“Guess I’m speaking to Jeon…”

On Jackson’s commands and with a set of instructions, you left the bar early. ‘Prep for tomorrow, rest and sober up.’ Three things that you were never quite well doing at the very last minute. Bits and pieces of information were fed to you, in order to try and snatch the job at its core.

‘From what I’ve heard, he likes to go in on Saturday mornings to catch up on some work.’ All that meant was that you had to wake up early, and your suspected hangover did not like that. You did what any ‘sane’ person would do and popped in a pain killer and a nausea reliever, an old family remedy to wake up fresh and ready.

‘At the breakfast buffet two blocks over, I once saw him obliterate the cheddar biscuits… And I think he has a thing for sausages too.’ Really, it seemed like Jackson knew Jungkook too well, but honestly so did the town through word of mouth. That last bit of information is what made you scour the nearest convenience store for the necessary ingredients to make the piece of resistance, the key to securing your assets. With this bread you were going to get your bread.

---

Morning came quickly, as you had gone to bed late baking and sorting out your clothes for the day. Sporting one of your finer ensembles just to make a statement, you were ready to take life by the throat. A dark gray, tight pencil skirt above the knee, a light beige button up blouse with pearled buttons, and a blazer to match the skirt. You applied a fair amount of neutral colored makeup in order to rejuvenate your features to not look like you’ve been miserable for the past 10 years. You finished off the look by slipping on some classic, black Mary Jane’s.

For the first time since inheriting this 1999 Verna, you were glad the aircon was a hunk of junk and only blew hot steam. Of course you drove with the windows down to receive actual fresh air, but you angled the conductors towards the biscuits, keeping them toasty and warm as if freshly baked that morning. Jeon Jungkook would be in the palm of your hands and the job would soon be in your possession. Financial stability: here I come.

Parked outside of the building, you painted on a mask with all of the false confidence and determination you could muster, before any ounce of regret could slip in. Once the clock hit 8:55am, it was time to go. You grabbed the biscuits, which you had ever so ‘lovingly’ placed in a basket upping the charm factor, and headed for the entrance.

I need money. I need money. I need money. It was the mantra of your choosing as you took the unnervingly long elevator ride up to the Bang-Lenzo office where your unannounced meeting with Jeon Jungkook awaited. Yes, unannounced. Obviously to anyone with common sense of time, 9:00pm wasn't a viable hour to schedule a meeting for the next morning, so you decided to take the determined approach and show up like you already owned the place. For the first time you had a goal and were dead set on obtaining it. Nothing would stop you from getting that income. I need money.

‘Bang-Lenzo INC.’ read the door sign in front of you. For a moment you closed your eyes, fighting off the urge to walk back to your car and forget this place. But your mantra was quick to erase such thoughts. I desperately need money. Overpowered with feigned confidence, you strutted into the main office. Immediately you were faced with your soon to be desk. It was large and crescent shaped, spacious and tall. In a room to your right, you heard a muffled voice. Surely that was Jeon’s office. With a huff of air, you went to knock on his door.

“Huh? C-come in?” Faint and hurried clattering was heard from inside. With suspicion, you went for the door, revealing behind it the manager, and possible future boss: Jeon Jungkook. Sporting nothing but a set of gray sweats, disheveled hair, and a headset placed around his neck. “Did you need something?”

The scene in front of you made you lose focus for a split second. You had never seen him before, and by personality description you expected many things except him being viciously attractive. And also a gamer, noted by the Overwatch screen on his computer. The thought left you in a split second, you only had one goal and it did not include sleeping with the manager to reach it. You learned that only works once and it’s never rewarding.

“I’m here for the secretary position? I figured since it’s early and unannounced I’d bring in a little something to eat.” A sweet and charmful voice oozed from your throat, foreign to your body unless it was summoned. The confused manager’s doe eyes lit up once they set intensely on the basket making way to his desk. “I hope you enjoy warm biscuits.” Before he could even question what was going on, you were already sitting across from him, placing your intricate resume in front of his grubby self, you were ready to snatch this job from his hands. He had already fallen victim to the biscuits. You could see the revival in his eyes as soon as he took the first bite. Butter and cheese were the key, but it was the mini weenies hidden inside that sealed the deal.

Jungkook didn't bother to offer it much of a glance. Instead he redirected his attention to you. “Are you good with computers and organizing?” Bread crumbs and cheese lingered on the corner of his lips as he spoke, you could have sworn some spittle came in your direction as well. Upon further inspection, the food stains on his sweats may have started a whole community of bacteria. Any office fantasy of getting railed by a manager quickly died with this individual, and some word of mouth started to make sense.

“Yes. Anything document and spreadsheet related I can handle, not to mention emails, and of course scheduling agendas-“

“And you made these? From scratch?” He held a biscuit in awe, and you couldn’t help but feel success in your future.

“I did.” You offered a soft, shy smile. Another desperate attempt to charm him for the job.

“Do you think you can bring them in on Monday mornings? Starting this Monday? Tell you what, I’ll raise you to $16 an hour if you do.” You choked on your saliva, instantly entering a coughing fit. He really might be off his rocker, but in this economy, who cares? Not you, because for simply baking Sunday nights you get an extra $40 a week. With this bread, you get your bread.

“I certainly can! It would be my pleasure.” “Great! Then let’s sign the paperwork and make it official.” He rummaged through his files to retrieve the contract. “Gosh, I can’t wait to tell the other managers all about my new beautiful secretary who cares for me, and cooks for me, and, who knows; maybe even have a secret romance with me?” There it was, the inappropriateness everyone talked about. Jungkook didn’t give you time to come out of your confused state. “Ha! I’m kidding! It’s just a joke. We’re professional. Professional. We’ll of course report our relationship to HR.” A noise seemingly from The Grudge escaped you. There was an ungodly uncomfortable silence before he decided to kill the awkwardness of the situation.“KIDDING AGAIN!”

You didn’t question the lacking interview, or how Jungkook was quick to hire you. It was the most unethical thing in the world and yet? You didn’t care. You were one step closer to financial stability, and that was all you could ever ask for. With the contract filled out and already added to the payroll, you had officially signed your soul over to the white collar world. Serving as the official secretary of Jeon Jungkook. He truly was an oddball, and somewhat inappropriate, but he didn’t give any indication of being an asshole of a boss. Too friendly and annoying, but you had the gut feeling he might just be a decent enough boss. Or at least not so much of an idiot that you can tolerate working for. Besides, the money’s good.

Walking out of and looking back at the building, your eyes spotted his office windows, with him behind, cheerfully waving you off as he ate the remains of the biscuits. A subtle reminder, you needed to prep your baking game.

---

With a more dressed down version of what you wore to the impromptu interview, you drove your car over to the office building. Only this time, pulling up to the parking lot as you were now an employee. Jungkook’s car was already there. A sleek, black Equus. In comparison to its ancestor, your Verna, it exuded upper management presence. He clearly was a successful 27 year old, and you aspired to be able to reach as much coin as he probably had some day. Really, all you ever wanted in life was money. Were you willing to work much for it though? Probably not, but you didn’t have a choice. It was time to get in gear and make up for lost time. 10 years of your life, in fact.

You stopped thinking about past mistakes before you could let them affect your first day. Taking the biscuits and purse in a hurried manner, you rushed up to the office. Only an hour earlier than the rest, but you still had things to prove, if only to yourself.

Upon arrival, Jungkook was busy fiddling on your computer. Documents and folders were neatly spread out on a corner of your desk, waiting to be filed and sorted.

“Hey Y/N, You’re early! I hope you don’t mind, I’m setting up your company email so you can quickly get started.” His quick fingers stopped abruptly, for just a moment, his hand reaching for the biscuits. “And thank you for these, I didn’t think you’d actually make them.” He cocked his head in surprise and took a bite before finishing setting up your computer and programs. The comment left you with an odd feeling.

“Of course I would, I promised it.” Truthfully you only agreed because of the pay raise, but you would still hold up with it. No complaints. “Why did you up my pay grade if you didn’t think so?”

“I don’t know, incentive? I figured this would be an easier way to have someone stay for longer than a week at least.” Shaking his head for only a brief second, he continued. “But there’s something about you that tells me you’re going to be the perfect fit here. You have potential, Y/N. That’s why I hired you.” What the fuck was he talking about, ‘Potential’? You were a 28 year old deadbeat, a failure and a degenerate according to your relatives. You had anything but potential. Noting the hesitation to answer, Jungkook changed the subject swiftly.

“And it’s done. I’ll give you a quick rundown of things on the machine and then we can work with organizing my schedule, I am so out of sync with this company and I haven’t a clue when my next meetings are.” With a clap, he stood up and motioned you to the seat. He continued to peruse through the biscuit basket, searching for the ‘cheesiest ones’.

After a tour throughout the company programs and where supplies and files were around the office, the other workers started to arrive in a timely fashion. Some didn’t bother to give you the time of day, but others decided to greet you as soon as they walked in. Particularly a few of the guys from accounting and sales were quite enthusiastic to greet you. If you remembered correctly, the younger pair of them were from Accounting; Jimin and Taehyung, they were really nice, a bit shy as were you, but very polite and warm. You watched as they sat at their corner and bickered slightly, but it seemed to be in honest fun. The one from sales, Hoseok, was the opposite in terms of shyness. He welcomed you with the most charming of smiles and emphasized that if you ever needed a helping hand around the office to not hesitate to ask him. He cheerfully chatted your ear for a few minutes giving you a small idea of what a day in the office might be. “It’s not that bad once you get used to it, you just need to give us a chance.” You heard his hidden pleas. Many people came and went from this place and their tongues never ceased to express their distaste for it. Even most of your coworkers gave off an air of annoyance with the place. You couldn’t blame them, but basing your experience on first impressions only, it could be worse. Only time will reveal the shithole everyone else claims this place to be.

It was 20 minutes past 8:00am and the once empty office was now filled and working. Jungkook came out of his office ever so often, glancing over the the desks, ‘tsk tsk tsk’ is all he ever spoke before going back behind his door. You thought to ignore his manner and focus on organizing his schedule based on the emails he forwarded you. He had plenty of meetings, webinars and conference calls to attend, and they were all scattered around. On your shared calendar, you added the event reminder and description for each and every one for the next month, even going an extra step to add reminders on your own calendar the day before, just to make sure he’s up to date.

A new email displayed on the screen, an impromptu conference call for Jungkook in 10 minutes labeled ‘URGENT’. You were about to head to his office to notify him, but you remained seated as the entrance door swung abruptly, startling you just enough to make you forget your name and the company you now work for. All you saw was a coat being placed on the rack next to you with an exasperated sigh escaping the core of the individual. Right away, it was clear that if there was anyone in the entire building that hated having to wake up early in the morning just to show up to work in this unfortunate place more than you, it was him. Like the majority of the employees, he looked straight up miserable, even behind dark colored sunglasses. The freshly made venti Iced Americano, the slow paced walk to his desk and his disregard to show up on time were, in your opinion, strong indicators of his likely hatred for his job.

Settled in his desk, he removed his shades. His narrow, cat-like eyes drew you in like magnets, there was no telling whether or not his iciness was natural, or a ruse to limit his interactions with the rest of the staff. Yet somehow they were still fitting for his rounder, chubbier cheeks. His lips were already pursed downward, but they seemed to curl even further and remain that way almost permanently as Jungkook peered his head out. You tried calling out to him, but your voice was muted by his own exclaims.

“Yoongi!” He shouted, you could say enthusiastically, towards the late addition in the office. He released another sigh, this time accompanied by an eye roll.

“Not now, Jungkook.” His voice was deep and low. Eyes never abandoning his monitor as Jungkook approached him.

Whatever conversation they were having was nothing but whispers and subtle head shakes. Yoongi was it? Didn’t seem in the mood for whatever chatter the manager kept going on about. You noticed bow everyone in the office was trying to work, but not being able to steal sudden glances from the conversation. Judging by those, especially Hoseok’s since he was sitting right at the situation, you assume they all had an idea as to what was unfolding. You, however, could only assume was an odd scolding in Jungkook’s manner for him showing up late.

A ringing alert brought your focus back to your own desk, the incoming call you guessed was from Corporate due to the email. Jungkook had previously requested that you warn him first before answering any calls from them, and you remembered what you were ready to do before Yoongi walked in. Not wanting to bring in any attention to yourself you debated quickly which was the best option, calling him over or going straight to him, but you didn’t even answer yourself before your legs started moving on their own.

“Jungkook.” You tapped his shoulder gently, and spoke softly. The young manager startled a bit, and you were unsure if the other man’s expression was relief or annoyance, but you let it go quickly.

“Yes? Oh! That reminds me. Everyone!” What you wanted to avoid was exactly what he gathered: attention.

“This is Y/N, office secretary. I want you all to make her feel welcome, be kind.” He kept going on one of his badly timed speeches until no one paid him any mind.

“Jungkook, you have-”

“Would you both excuse yourselves and talk elsewhere?” The deep voice that spoke seemed to command more authority than Jungkook did.

“Sorry,Y/N. Yoongi’s a bit on edge due to his divorce trial.” The last phrase he tried to utter as a whisper by leaning close to your ear, and although he made it sound like such, it was still loud enough for people to hear.

“Do you really have to tell people about my personal life? Where does it end with you?”

“I felt like I needed to excuse your attitude, she’s part of our family now anyways, she can know.”

Their bickering picked up again, Jungkook defending the reasoning for his declarations and Yoongi countering with how he always oversteps fine lined boundaries and doesn't have any common sense. Although you very much agreed with what Yoongi was saying that it was an invasion of privacy, you were still caught in the middle of their crossfire and all you wanted to do was inform Jungkook about the god forsaken call.

“JUNGKOOK.” Your raised voice silenced their bickering, and the room came to an onlooking halt. Anxiety started creep behind you due to shouting over your manager on your first day, causing flashbacks of previous outcomes due to this similar situation to roll like a montage in your head, but your patience was running thin.

“What, what is it?” Jungkook, unphased by the situation, cocked his head at you in slight confusion.

“You have a call from Corporate.” You maintained your stern tone, but you were wavering internally. His demeanor took a turn, eyes so wide you feared they would pop out.

“Did you answer?” Whispers gave an undertone of fear. With the phone still ringing in the background, you shook your head.

“Good. Tell them I’m out with a major client. I’m not here.” He hurriedly walked you back to the phone. The glint in his eyes says you should worry, but you swallowed and answered with the same feigned confidence you used for the interview.

“Bang-Lenzo, this is Y/N.”

You successfully got rid of the Corporate call in the morning, but you were unsure how long that might last given the urgency they requested it with. And Jungkook’s behavior regarding any calls from Corporate today, or the rest of the week from what he stated, was worrisome. It was a concern you’d tuck to the back of your head, it wasn’t your business anyways.

As the day went on, you saw that life in the office was quite eventful, so to speak. After the ordeal of Yoongi’s divorce proceedings this morning, and Jungkook avoiding Corporate like the Black Plague, an array of unusual things for a normal day to day office routine continued to happen.

Mainly, Jungkook was entirely distracting. To you, the staff and mostly to himself. He would constantly try to make conversation with anyone, and the topics were always painfully awkward. Anytime he was actually in his office, more time was spent playing Overwatch with Taehyung than doing any kind of work. Not to mention he eventually ventured over to the conference room, with Jimin and Hoseok in toe, for their “twice a day dancercise routine” as their official 15 minute break away from their computers.

If you thought the nonsense would end there, you were soon to be corrected. It in fact continued in the numerous times Taehyung and Jimin came by your desk asking for copies. And not even official work copies- they were asking you to print out different versions of invitational flyers for their ‘seasonal crop party’. To your surprise, Taehyung had inherited the only strawberry farm in the region due to his grandparents passing, not like you had bothered to ask anyways. The only question you cared an answer for was if Jungkook had approved of using office supplies for this. It shouldn't have shocked you like it did that the man himself had designed the flyer and organized such an event, but still.

Lunchtime couldn’t arrive quicker. Some of the staff beelined with their meals over to the lunchroom area, while the others went out to eat. You half expected Jungkook to take advantage of the lunchroom crowd for his shenanigans, but he opted for eating in his office with Jimin and Taehyung instead. You could hear their incessant planning murmurs as you passed by to heat up your meal.

“Y/N!” Jungkook exclaimed once he caught your movement. “If the others give you the cold shoulder, feel free to join us here for lunch.”

“Oh, it’s okay. I planned on eating at my desk,” You chose your next words carefully, feeling the party planners’ gazes. “But I’ll keep it in mind in case I get too lonely, thank you!” The soft smile that spread across your smile was enough to comfort them from the small rejection. They went back to their discussions and you headed for the microwave.

Peaking your head into the lunchroom, it was filled with the younger, unwelcoming faces from earlier. It’s not like you planned on sitting down and chatting with them, you were there just to heat up your lunch, but upon entry you noticed how their conversations volumes lowered all the way down to whispers and snickers. You focused your attention on the whirring noises and beeps the microwave offered as a mere distraction. It was a curse you carried for as long as you could remember. Any giggle, whisper, snicker, or anything of the sort you heard in your perimeter, you felt was directed at you. As if they could see the list of failures and misfortunes displayed on your back.

You took your bowl and offered the room a nervous smile and nod before leaving, hoping it came across as a ‘sorry to bother, enjoy your lunch’. As you exited the room, Hoseok, tailed by Yoongi, was heading with his food over to the conference room.

“Y/N, come join us if you want.” Hoseok was beaming, if the sun was human it would be him. Contrary to the one walking past him, not bothering to stop. He could be truthfully considered the dark side of the moon. Although with his back to you, you could make out his unrelenting scowl reflecting in the conference room’s glass wall. “Ignore him, he’s still mad over this morning.”

“All things considered, I can’t blame him. But I think I’ll pass.” Hoseok hooked his free arm around yours before you could continue.

“Nonsense, you shouldn’t cast yourself out on the first day.” In truth, Hoseok’s friendly manner and joyous attitude couldn’t be denied. You felt his genuine interest in making sure your transition into the office was a smooth one. In the room, Yoongi was already gulpin down his food, not bothering to glance up until he spoke.

“Shut the door so I can tell you…” Words escaped him, replaced by a sigh as he spotted your presence, and Hoseok’s sudden realization of what this lunch reunion entailed. Surely, they were meant to discuss the divorce proceedings, but Hoseok forgot upon trying to welcome you.

“Right… Y/N, rain check? Alone on your first day though...” He sighed as he flushed with embarrassment and you couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Don’t worry,” that was directed more at Yoongi if anything, a small assurance accompanied by the subtlest of nods. The rest was for Hoseok, as a dismissive joke to calm his worries. “I’ll probably join the Crop Festers and their shenanigans.” He cocked his head in confusion, a sharp ‘hm?’ caught in his throat. You brushed it off, leaving them with a wave. Wishing them a nice lunch and closing the door behind you, it was unknown to you that the Crop Festers had overheard, and were expecting you at Jungkook’s door excitedly.

“So you’re joining us then?” Taehyung assumed overjoyed, and Jimin couldn’t hide his giddiness. Jungkook was at the back at his desk, shaking his head in tune with soft chuckles before waving you in. It was clear that there was no way to have an unbothered lunch for the next 45 minutes, so… You joined.

Tae, as he now urged you to call him, and Jimin made space for you between them. Rice, meats, noodles, and an array of veggies were spread across the desk, now along with your own addition of food and in no time you were all eating and sharing your meals. Jungkook even offered up the few remaining biscuits, causing Tae and Jimin to fuss over why weren’t they brought out sooner and how good of a cook you were. Now they were expectant for next Monday morning for a pleasant cheesy boost.

Unknown to your conscious self, you were having a nice time. Further into the lunch, you became more involved with the Crop Party planning, and were even getting a bit excited for the day to arrive. A paid work day for a strawberry picking party? Who could say no to that? You weren’t ready to admit it just yet, with it being the first day and all, but… You were starting to like this place, even if you weren’t ready to acknowledge it. Once lunch was over, and everyone was making their way back to their desks, they eyed you with slight annoyance as you walked out of the office along with Tae and Jimin, still laughing at one of Jungkook’s impressions of some of the staff. Unaware, Yoongi and Hoseok exchanged a suspicious glance. Who was to blame any of them? It was a first for them to see someone new being friendly, or accepting the office shenanigans as they transpired.

Afternoon was a milder version of what the morning turned out to be, everyone was calmer now, and as the hours passed you noticed they worked harder. Even Jungkook was filing reports and taking work calls, as long as they weren’t from Corporate. One of your last tasks was to send out some notice of change in policy emails to clients, it was the most time consuming, but it helped the remaining hours pass by in a flurry.

Bags started to be packed and coats began to be thrown on as the clock got nearer to 5:00pm. Everyone was ready to put an end to the odd Monday, and you could tell by their soft smiles and shy ‘See you tomorrow’s. Hoseok dropped by your desk with a “Lunch tomorrow, for sure!” before leaving and wishing you well. Yoongi followed behind him, not offering anything at all. More than likely still fussy over his personal issues being announced in the office. Jimin and Taehyung each went for a goodbye hug, as they were more than excited to have you aboard. Often they carpooled, you found out that they live together on the farm. After being friends for so long, they decided to run it together. Only you and Jungkook, who was still stuck in his office remained. With your things on hand, you peered through his window to give him a small wave which he returned, followed by pointing to the phone and making mocking expressions of talking too much. With a shake of your head, you went to clock out, putting an end to the first day on the job. You would call it a success, for it being your very first 8-5, and it deemed celebration. So once you hopped on your Verna, and peered out of the parking lot, your destination was clear: Slack Jack’s.

You had never once been there on a Monday, much less after 5:00pm. Late weekend nights were what you had grown accustomed to due to your old odd jobs here and there. But much to your surprise, the ambience at this hour was much more tranquil and up your alley than what you were used to. You hated crowds and loud groups of people, and there was none of that here. Eyes scanned the bar for your favorite and only owner, who upon noticing your arrival called you over to an empty stool up at the bar. Eager steps made their way over as he placed your favorite shot on the counter: a water moccasin. You paid no mind to the individual next to your stool as you sat down, eyes trained on the peachy, sweet and sour whiskey shot glass before you. Widened eyes stared, unknown to you, as you drank it in one big gulp, placing the now empty glass on the counter, snapping and pointing at Jackson with finger guns as you exclaimed “Hit me again”.

A smirk played on the corners of his mouth as he placed a second one just as you finished asking. Knowing your habits, he made two as soon as he saw you. “I’m guessing today went... ?” He was expecting you to tell him all about your day, as soon as you finished fighting off the burning feeling down your throat. It was always the second one that got you the most. Hissing for only a few seconds, you spoke.

“Honestly? Honestly honest? I can’t complain.” Alcohol was slowly starting to take effect on you as you rambled on. “At first I was kinda freaked out? Because everyone was kinda weird? OH! And then Jungkook decided to out a guy’s whole divorce or something?” In the background, next to you, someone cleared their throat as Jackson bit his bottom lip, trying to hold in a chuckle, but you went on. “I don’t know, it was weird. But like afterwards, it was pretty chill. Jungkook ain’t that bad. And lowkey? I can’t wait for the strawberry season, dude.” A snort escaped you as you thought back on the Crop Party. You couldn’t wait. Tae mentioned something about making fresh milkshakes, and right now you were wildin’ at the thought.

“So I’m guessing you’ve met Yoongi?” Jackson’s hand motioned you to look to your right. Lo and Behold, Mr. Divorcee was magically there, a citrus whiskey on the rocks in his hands. And that’s when it hits you, you have a loud mouth.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” Eyes like a deer in headlights, pleading for forgiveness. Yoongi waved it off. You finally heard his voice without a hint of annoyance.

“It’s fine.” Bringing the glass to his lips, he took a long sip. Which reminded you.

“Jackson, may I please--”

“Have another?” He chuckled as he went to prepare a fresh shot. “Don’t get carried away tonight, though. You work tomorrow, remember?”

“Hey, I have self control. I won’t drink past 6:30, I swear.” To even prove such control, you didn’t rush to down the shot. Instead you tried to build a conversation with the man in charge of the drinks, but he cursed silently at a reminder.

“Fuck, excuse me for a sec. I have to call my parents.” You remembered him mentioning something about an upcoming anniversary as he rushed to the back, leaving you alone with Yoongi, a shot and your thoughts.

Allowing your mind to travel far for a moment, the waterfall of bitter memories with your family started to cloud your field of vision. Forgetting where you were and who was around, you brought your hands up to either cheek and gave yourself some quick, small smacks in an attempt to distract your tear ducts from doing their job. A groan escaped you as you reached for the shot in front of you, disappearing it in an instant. So much for self control.

The man next to you watched in awe. He already knew far more about you than whatever first impressions you thought you gave, courtesy of Jackson. But he was one to always doubt the extent of the things he said, and since forming odd suspicions of you at the office, he figured now was the time to see if anything added up.

“Escapism?” The sudden voice shocked you, and brought you back to reality. Another snort made its way out your nose, in an endearing manner.

“You can say that. No, you know what? Life is a bitch.” In your drunken manner, you broke. You vented, you ranted, and you rambled. You laid out your entire life in front of this man, this stranger, revealing more than what was necessary, but you couldn’t stop yourself. “And now here I am.” Fingers tapped the counter, antsy. Waiting for Jackson to come back and serve you yet another shot to calm down.

“I see, I’m sorry for all that. Things are looking up now, at least?” Yoongi shrugged, a winced expression since your story was still fresh in his mind. “But, if it makes you feel any better, I have some fucked up shit going on myself."

“Oh really? A divorce? Family exile beats loveless marriage any day, boy.” Another side effect of your alcoholism was straight up competitiveness. Even though it stung him, he couldn’t help but laugh. For him, it even felt like the first time in a while he had done so earnestly.

“My wife is pregnant.” Whiskey glass was brought back to his lips for a moment, barely touching them. “And it’s not mine.” He finished off the remainder of the glass, while you stared in silence, jaw dropped.

“Whoa, that sucks... How do you know though?” You brought your face closer to him, in curious intrigue, not knowing what personal space was; but he didn’t mind much as he inched in a bit closer to speak.

“I had a vasectomy.” A sighed escaped his core as he too revealed his life to a stranger. “Before we got married, we were clear that we didn’t want children. At least not for a long time, so I got the surgery done. If we ever wanted kids we would have a talk and take out time to decide how to go about it. But one day,” he shook his head, thoughts lost in the memory “she was very persistent that I go get the reversal done. Like, that I had to get it done that week. And I found that suspicious, so I pretended to get it.” His fingers now mimicked yours earlier, lightly tapping on the counter. “We waited the recovery time, had sex, and a few days later, she was pregnant. So I filed for divorce. Do I win now?” His usual serious pout curled into a smirk as you shook your head no.

“Nah, I still win. You can always get a new wife, I can never get new parents. I don’t make the rules, chief.”

The mood was starting to liven up, but the universe often threw curveballs in your direction. Text alerts distracted you from your office chatter with Yoongi, and again, you soured. It wasn’t often when you received messages from your cousin, but you never talked about the elephant in the room. This time, however.

‘Your dad’s been asking about you lately. Anything worth mentioning?’ You watched the words fade from the pop-up screen, and debated in silence. The shift was visible, and Yoongi caught it as it happened. “Is everything okay?” he asked. Instead of answering, you simply opened the chat and showed him the message. Grabbing your phone in his hands he stared.

“Do I answer? Do I just leave it for tomorrow? What could I even bother telling?” Complaints continued to spew out of your mouth, muting the light clicks of Yoongi’s rapid fingers working on the keyboard. You’re only brought back from your rambles when you feel him pressing your phone still in his hand, back into yours, a message already written out in the text box.

‘I just started at a new office job. Safe, secure. It’s working out.’ Short, simple and to the point. A quick nod was enough for him to press send. As he pulled away, leaving you with the chat which was instantly read, you expected to feel a bit better, but your worries and anxiety remained as your fingers drummed at a quickened pace, itching for yet another shot.

Right on cue, Jackson’s presence made its way to you. Catching your tells, his hands moved straight to the Schnapps.

“Actually, I think she might be better off with water instead.” You shot daggers at him, annoyed at such an assumption. “Same for me. You said you won’t drink past 6:30. I don’t make the rules, chief.” You couldn't grumble out much, because as much as you desperately wanted to be irresponsible and drown your sorrows in waves of alcohol, you had a new, very decent, job to uphold. And that required showing up sober.

The rest of the night went by pretty decently, ending with a new weird routine of going home early instead of waiting until Jackson finished closing off, to drag you all the way to his car. The nights you drove to your home from the bar were less than the ones he posted you up at his own apartment.

“You’re good to drive, right?” This time, it was Yoongi who was nice enough to walk you over to the beat up Verna at the end of the lot.

“Surprisingly enough, I am. Thanks.” Sticking the key into the lock, you jiggled it around. The only sure way to open the door these days. “What about you?”

“Considering I only had one glass of whiskey, I think I’m alright.” He motioned over to the Genesis next to you. “I’m gonna head out. Drive safe.”

You nod and make sure he's at least safe besides his car door before entering yours. Turning back briefly to look at you, your goodbye wave stops halfway as his words reach your ears.

“Lunch tomorrow.” Is all he says. he doesn't even bother waiting for a confirmation, he simply gets inside his car and drives away.

Starting up your car was always a hassle but you got it kicking in no time. As you pulled out of the lot, you spotted the Genesis still at the empty intersection. You flashed your headlights twice before heading the opposite direction, and from your rearview saw him continue on his way. Despite all the characters and particular personas inhabiting the living bodies of your coworkers, you couldn’t help but think: Yoongi's just might be the most intriguing to you after all.

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