Hi here’s a summary of what i hyperfixated on, obsessed over, etc in 2023
January: Succession (specifically Tom and Greg (and then N*ck Br*un))
February: Succession cont. I will never forgive N*ck Br*un for being gross and ruining my singular spark of creative energy that I was using to write a bomb tomgreg fic.
March: Succession cont., CAR SEAT HEADREST!
April: CAR SEAT HEADREST BUT MORE
May: It’s always sunny in Philadelphia (Charlie Day specifically. I started watching bc a guy I was interested in acted and looked like Charlie Kelly)
June: I discover that Charlie Day is in a fun little movie called pacific rim. I then force everyone I know to watch it even though it’s not great. I go on one date because I was promised that we could watch pacific rim. Yes even the shitty sequel.
July: more IASIP/PacRim/Charlie Day
August: CharMac as a ship (listen ao3 has some bangers in this department)
September: nothing specific. I was starting college so I didn’t have much brainpower to devote to silly little guys
October: Horror movies! I tried to watch one every day of the month. I love just making and using lists.
November: brief dive into FNAF, the hunger games. I am not immune to Josh Hutcherson, and maybe like one week of Saltburn
December: Nothing until after Christmas. I attempted to watch the Christmas episodes of my favorite shows but finals week hit and I couldn’t.
End of December: The Holdovers BABEYYYY I love Angus Tully! I’m sad Dominic Sessa isn’t in anything else, but this was a great debut film.
Predicted January: Movies. I have lists of movies from all of my friends that I need to watch. I love lists ‼️‼️‼️
Shit we can add music?
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(Not At All) Secretly Into You
Pedro Pascal x Reader
Summary: Pedro thinks the best way to be slick about his crush on you is to be 100% unabashed about it. Ha ha! No one will expect that he has feelings for you if he's outright about it!
Word Count: 1k+
Warnings: gender neutral reader, Actor/Actress!reader, the use of y/n T_T, dummy!pedro, fluff, crackfic, typos, etc.
A/N: i cant help myself. i just head empty only pedro
look at this gif people. take a good long look at him. what is it about him that has us in such a chokehold? i think this is the tipping point of humanity. what is it about him that has us like this? 😩 HES SO STUPID AND DUMMY HELLO?! he needs to be stopped. he needs to be jailed. or better yet SOMEONE MARRY HIM SO THAT WE INHERETLY GO OH SHIT ITS OVER SOMEONE WON T_T thank you for reading my little rant
Tagging: @pinksirensong @aralezinspace @sloanexx @amis-love-bugs @top1bbgloak
Let me set the scene for you
It's a cold, rainy day.
There's a person all alone in their bedroom. They're bored AF.
They look up, 'movies to watch 2023', and finds a film they're interested in.
It's staring Pedro Pascal & [Y/N].
It's good.
So good.
Too good. It becomes their personality.
They begin to hyperfixate.
They look for other related content.
Behind the scenes.
Interviews. Interviews.
They fall in love with the dynamic of the main characters IRL.
They hyperfixate on them. They're not the only one in this boat.
They search for other content.
They stumble across a fan edits. Fan edits.
Their mouth waters at it.
They watch it.
Here's how one of them starts:
Hello.
After watching the movie of Pedro Pascal and [Y/N] and going absolutely feral (GO WATCH IT WIMPS) I have taken it upon myself to do a thorough investigation of their relationship (because I am CERTAIN they smashed and BY THE POWER OF ANIME I'm going to make it certain YOU think it's certainly so) so-
Without Further Ado, I present:
They Smashed, And Here's The Evidence.
You and Pedro are doing an interview answering questions while eating snacks from your respective hometowns. This is a snippet from that interview.
Cut scene, the question, which is read by a staff member off camera, is 'what is your favorite thing about the other?'
"You know, what my favorite thing about you is?" Pedro asks, albeit somehow rhetorically, as he chews on something. He was looking at you when he asked this. He watches with crossed arms as you struggle to open the snack packet.
His eyes dart to the small, plastic wrapped cookies as you sigh in defeat and hand it to him. He grins to himself, dramatically rolling his neck before he takes it from you and begins to open make his attempt to open it. Because of your lack of response, he asks as he rips at the package, "do you want to know what my favorite thing about you is?"
"Not really, no," you say, crossing your arms, knitting your brows, shaking your head.
Pedro makes a face looking out to no one in particular. He turns to you, just as he opens the wrapper, "meanie."
You beam, claiming the treat he hands it to you, "thank you."
He watches as you carefully get a cookie for yourself. Pedro looks at the camera, "as of this moment, I rescind any positive feelings I may have ever felt for-GRFF-"
You shove a cookie in his mouth as you excitedly moan and speak half-muffled with a full mouth, "it's still good!"
Pedro chews on the cookie.
"I used to love these when I was like," you raise your hands, "this big."
It takes a few moments for you to merit a response.
"You're literally still that big, what do you mean?" Pedro says.
You give him a second's glance as you clear your mouth, "talk to me like that after you retire your heels to join the 6 feet and above club."
Pedro shakes his head and rolls his eyes, "You're not even getting anywhere near the entr-"
You shove another cookie in his mouth, effectively cutting him off.
"My favorite thing about Pedro is when his mouth is shut."
Pedro's chews viscously, rolling his eyes all over again. He looks into the camera with a wholly exaggerated look. He then scoffs loudly, throwing his head back, crossing his arms all over again, mouth half-full, "you better pray you can keep your mouth shut later tonight."
Cut the cameras.
Did yall hear that?
WELL LET ME MAKE SURE YOU DID
"You better pray you can keep your mouth shut later tonight."
Later Tonight
Later Tonight.
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING LATER TONIGHT AND CAN I PLEASE PARTICIPATE?
Now, ok, if you're some weird puritan that got mixed up in this mumbojumbo for lolz and you're thinking, 'oh maybe they're going to play Uno. Uno is pretty intense.'
you're wrong
get the fuck outta here /:
Now.
I raise you some out of context clips that give off domestic energy.
Clip #1: In the subway
Quite literally, it's a video post on your Instagram of you and Pedro riding a slightly packed metro in New York. You're holding your phone closely to you. It's showing both yours and Pedro's double chin. The only reason why you're recording is because he's singing a children's song from Barney, 'And The Green Grass Grows All Around' under his breath. You ardently hold back your laughter as he begins to do the gestures.
>>>COMMENT SCREENSHOT:
@ pascalispunk : it's a bop, fam. 😔 why'd you have to play me like this
@yn_000 replied: literally no one said it wasnt a bop my love
@ pascalispunk replied: i love it when you call me your love 💗
IN FRONT OF MY FUCKING SALAD.
THE SHEER AUDACITY OF THESE LOVE-DOVEY SEWER RATS. I DEMAND SATISFACTION.
Clip #2: The Breakfast Person
"I'm not really a breakfast person," you casually admit, mid-interview.
Pedro audibly gasps, "you're not a br- Wait, no, suddenly that makes so much sense. You stuff your face so quickly during lunch."
You slap him on the chest, "hey!"
Pedro snorts, "it's okay, baby, I gotchu," he begins to cook on his imaginary pan, "bacon and eggs, pancakes, oatmeal, whatever, I gotchu."
"You make oatmeal in a pan?" you ask, furrowing your brows.
"Only for the people I love," he smiles and leans towards you. He begins to make a weird laughing noise that sounds part motorcycle, part massive idiot who's so damn annoying.
You take a seconds look at him before smacking him on the face.
Cinematic parallels.
Clip #3: Our Fridge
"There," Pedro holds up the portrait of you that he had been completing the entire interview.
You look up from your own paper and break into hysterics. You lean into your knees from where you sat, nearly toppling forward. Pedro chuckles as he reaches out to you to keep you from falling. You lean back in your seat and wheeze, "what IS that?"
"What do you mean," Pedro grins, "don't you recognize yourself?"
You make a face as you catch your breath. You point to the top area of his paper, "is that supposed to be an eye?"
Pedro looks at his creation, "no, that's... that's that-- but this is your eye."
"You mean to tell me you drew me one eye?"
"I took creative liberties."
You chuckle in disbelief, "this man just told me he thinks I look like Mike Wazowski."
"Mike Wazowski wishes he'd look half as good as you, mi amor."
You turn to the camera, "I don't know how I feel about that."
"Which part?"
"Every part!"
"Well," he rips the page off the sketchpad, "better put this on our fridge."
"We are not putting this on our fridge."
"Why not?" he whines.
"Well, besides the fact it's ugly-"
"WOW," he trails off loudly, "just because it doesn't meet twisted societal beauty standards doesn't mean it's ugly."
You simply shake your head, "that is not going anywhere near our fridge."
PEDRO SAID BOO YOUR PETTY SOCIETAL BEAUTY STANDARDS 😩😩😩
YOU TELL EM PEDRO.
Also, they really said
OUR FRIDGE
And I think that's beautiful.
And now quite possibly, the most damning evidence of all.
THIS.
You and Pedro are sat next to each other on a sofa across an interviewer during one of those fan meet interview sort of segments. It's a fan cam, and from the angle in which this particular audience member is sat, its very much visible that Pedro, with his arm slung on the top of the back rest, was drawing circles onto your back. You do not outwardly react to his touch at all. [THIS RAT SO USED TO IT FFS]
You turn to Pedro and ask on through your mic, "what do you think?"
He says 'huh' off mic, then straightens up and brings his mic to his lips, only to give you a confused look.
"What do you think of that scene?" you repeat, brushing his brows with your thumb in affectionate annoyance. [BOO 👎 PDA BOO TOMATO TOMATO TOMATO 🍅🍅🍅🍅]
"Oh," he says, "that scene," he nods his head and widens his eyes at you, hoping you'd help him out.
The crowd laughs. [SIMPS smh]
You only mimic his wide eyes and offer a raised brow.
Pedro and you stare for a moment. Ultimately, he sighs and rubs your nape with his fingers, "fine-" the person recording says 'WTF' "-I have no idea what you're talking about."
There is a chorus of laughs.
"I'm still on the part where you said I was hot when I was covered in blood."
The crowd screams. You roll your eyes. Pedro laughs as he literally grabs your neck and pulls you into him, crushing you against him.
The crowd goes wild. The person who is recording is cursing.
Deep breath. FIRST OF ALL-
The person recording's a real MVP for managing to keep (relatively) calm while witnessing the gall of those two to do that in front of EVERYONE'S SALAD.
Second of all, aint no way, aint NO WAY you let someone like tHIS-
-with his itty bitty tiny waist and manhandle you like THAT in, and I can't stress this enough, FRONT OF EVERYONE'S SALADS, and not do anything further. It's science.
You're honor, the ruling, please.
100% Guilty of ✨Smashing✨
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