#I THOUGHT THEY WERE JOKING

[trousers-are-for-wimps]

WAIT THERE ARE ACTUALLY PEOPLE THAT SHIP LUCY WITH THE SKULL IM CRYINF

#I THOUGHT THEY WERE JOKING #this is sending me #lockwood and co #save lockwood and co #skullyle? ig?

[shyslullabye]

this military wife shit jus got serious.

#i thought they were joking #hes genuinely leaving me im sick to mystomach #TAEYONG😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 #shy speaks (too much)

[ghostsgerard]

ghost can i ask about how you set and air fryer on fire……

i just put the chicken in there eh

#g.txt #i put frozen chicken tenders and fries in the air fryer and walked away #and then my parents later yelled to my room ‘hey.. your food is on fire’ #i thought they were joking #THE FUNNY PART #my food wasn’t even cooked all the way >:( #tim tag

[ratbrick]

My friends opening their home to me while my roommate has a psychotic break like

#ive never feared for my own safety before so thats new #everything in my life is so unsettled and uncertain #i need a new job that pays me enough to live alone like real bad #when i say psychotic break im not kidding #violently slamming things around #throwing things outside #all of which is made wirse by the fact that im unmedicated and anxious and more prone to anxiety attacks #worse not wirse but you get it #one of my friends said I'd been miserable since i got to this new house and theyre right #i HAVE been miserable #i didnt even realize how miserable I'd been #nothing feels comfortable or settled #everythhing feels sterile or forced #i definitely dont want to spend another year living with someone who gave their lartner a key after less than a month of knowing them #yeah not dating them #KNOWING them #and they didnt tell me until after they'd already done it #i thought they were joking #nope #get me out get me away #im mourning myself tbh #i was so happy living alone #so healthy #so mentally whole #down the drain the second i started living with someone again

[caluski]

So sick of this overly negative meme that shows up every single fucking month so made my own version.

#Like thought we were done with the self depreciating jokes where the punchline is 'I wanna kms'. Whatever #pogaduchy

[inkskinned]

probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.

we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."

at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.

the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.

the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.

what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.

here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.

#this is true #writeblr #warm up #relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes #amongst the Siblings #is like - ''this is so good u will love it'' #while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting #like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good'' #to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good #(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and #like. we're GONNA try the new thing.) #edit to answer why we had so much vanilla: #my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house. #it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out'' #even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter. #my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract #to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids #so like she was right to stock up #ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that #u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it #> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes #> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out) #listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9 #when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it. #3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters #i am the middle child #out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite

[kohanaaaaa]

What the hell is happening to twitter?

#I thought they were joking #still havent updated my twt since 2020 #twitter?

[sskk-manifesto]

OH MY GOD??????

#I know the author made a tweet about it when season 4 was airing but I thought they were half joking... #Wow. Four people in the entire city of Yokohama #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd s1 #bsdrewatch2023

[derpycatsu]

fart dump first one is a redraw of this the rest showed up at my door in a wet cardboard box

#sorry had to repost the tags were super fucked up #i dont feel like retyping everything ummm #1 i have Thoughts on post xy sycamore. i think he is so sad #and him and diantha have an awesome friendship. theyre very silly goofy #and i like perfectworld but only when its so sad and doomed(Half Joking) #professor sycamore #augustine sycamore #lysandre #perfectworldshipping #champion diantha #steven stone #gym leader wallace #champion wallace #originshipping #pokemon #pokemon xy #wallace pokemon #pokemon oras #felix art

[itsamenickname]

Bowser: *adjusts his bowtie before holding out his hand* Let's rule the world, together. Forever. Will you marry me?

Luigi: *staring at Bowser with an annoyed expression as he's tied to a chair and also wearing Peach's dress and wig*

#bowser #bowser nintendo #bowser my beloved #luigi #luigi nintendo #luigi my beloved #bowuigi #bowser x luigi #super mario #super mario bros #super mario movie #super mario bros movie #the super mario bros movie #mario movie spoilers #super mario movie spoilers #not sure if it counts as spoilers but I'll put the spoiler tags anyway #so fun fact: when I first saw that scene where Bowser was practicing his marriage proposal I thought we were going to have a Bowuigi moment #like no joke my dudes #after Bowser asked the big question I genuinely thought that it was going to pan to Luigi tied up in a chair (with an unamused expression) #you can imagine my disappointment when it instead panned to Kamek wearing Peach's dress and wig #now don't get me wrong while I did enjoy seeing Kamek crossdressing #it just would've been so much funnier and really adorable if Bowser was practicing his proposal to Luigi #especially since Luigi was barely in the movie at all #but that's a conversation for another day #maybe #anyway enjoy the Bowuigi scene that could've been but Nintendo and Illumination were too afraid to do :)

[thegreatyin]

while im still catching up on dungeon meshi there's a quick thing i forgot to mention earlier

what was their fucking problem

#wrong/joke/ambigous answers only if at all please and thank you don't spoil me here #yin-thoughts #dungeon meshi #they were in the op!!! i see their ass in the op!!!!!!!! #what is their deal.... they're cute.......... #are they also a real ass person just hangin out

[figuring-it-all-out]

Is it gay to temporarily remove your soul from your body to make out with be on the same dimensional plane as a ghost?

#Ghostbusters #Ghostbusters Frozen Empire #Ghostbusters Spoilers #Phoebe Spengler #McKenna Grace #Is it gay #Meme #Joke #But seriously why did Phoebe and Melody NOT make out? #I 100% thought they were going to kiss a few times #It def felt like they were into each other #They even had a meet cute for god's sake! #The chemistry between them was insane #Movie #Mine

[gyroshrike]

If I didn't get this posted in time for Valentine's Day I was going to lose it. So, Happy Valentine's day! Here's some pain!

[Video version]

#helluva boss #stolitz #blitz #blitzo #blitzø #stolas #stolas x blitz #stolas x blitzo #5 mins to go EY YO #my art #for anyone who expected valentine's art from me #you were probably expecting husk and angel #jokes on you #haha STOLITZ #i have been working on this thing foreverrrrr #but right as I finished it yesterday #I thought to myself #okay but what if I painted a background #and changed the entire color palette #and fully colored it #and rendered the lighting :) #c0nji you're the only reason I finished this #ty ty ty

[hello-im-queer]

I was today's years old when I realized that people actually think that other people are attractive.

Like

PEOPLE JUST LOOK AT A BODY AND BE LIKE : 'whoa I wanna date, hot, sexy, kiss kiss' ?!?!?

#i always thought ppl were joking #whoa #thanks jaiden animations #well #im indeed an asexual #lgbtq #aroace #asexual #asexual community #asexual aromantic #grey ace #gray ace #ace stuff #ace #ace positivity #ace pride #ace spec #imrwtm

[susie-dreemurr]

The “Gerald texting Linda everything is okay while he’s dying alone” and “Linda thinks she finally won her father’s respect only for him to remorselessly throw her to the wolves” got to me.

#nightmare time #I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE JOKING BUT IT REALLY DOES MAKE YOU FEEL FOR THE WORST PEOPLE HUH #linda monroe #nightmare time 2 #honey Queen #starkid #hatchetverse #mine #this template can also go for other episodes of this series such as time bastard #nmt

[gulducock]

look at this pic i found on twitter

#mine #hi heres my star trek take for today #does anyone else feel a little teeny bit weird when peeople talk abou t #wait ok hold on spoilers for s7 of ds9. dont read ahead ok #does anyone feel weird when peopeple joke about how kai winn and dukat were such a good couple when he like. raped her #like i know why they do but did no one think about that whole story arc hard enoigh to realize what he did to her #explicitly stated on screen. like thats verbatim unconcensual sex what happened and everyones liek its funny because dukats funny #and kai winn is a bitch which she is but also idk. does this make sense #ok thats my thought this have nothing to do with the abive image #i just didnt want to make this into a text post :| anyohe else get scared when dukat is on the scren #okay goodbye. im rewatching viyager btw not fr im just putting it on for comfort whenever i feel sick which is often LOL! but like on n off #can we make the doctor more popular than data =. keep going warriors