#I just wanna feel a bit better

[anemptypuddingcup]

Ima be honest. I’ve been feeling horrible.

I’ve been having a bit of shoulder pain and it’s irking me because I’m afraid it’s gonna get worse.

Though it’s not as bad at it when when I had gotten sick like a few years ago so I don’t know.

I need to get right though. I’m tired of sleeping in the day and not getting shit done. I’m supposed to be writing for y’all and posting art others on insta.

Really, I’m just fucking tired of myself and need to get out more and do something.

I need to be more productive and get my ass up.

I’m never taking a break from tumblr though, my passion for writing practically leaks out of my brain every hour of the day.

#damn- #sorry for this long ass vent #I just wanna feel a bit better #sickle cell’s a bitch man. #puddingtalking

[lovelycryptidnamedlucifer]

hrrrr

rrhhhrhhmhmmhhrrrhhhhhhh

hrhjmfgghdgfdh

>:',(

#unhappy stimming #keeping it hashtag vague #i just wanna feel a bit better #you can ask about it if you want #but it's not required

[jflxwr]

big compilation of wof dragons as instagram create memes

#darkstalker wouldve gotten his own post but god there are no fucking photos of this mf !!! #contemplated for a bit on which meme should go to who #feel free to tell me if u think another dragon would fit the meme as well or even better :3 #i wont change it for u but i like just wanna know LOLOLOL #wings of fire #wings of fire memes #wof #wof memes #qibli wof #wof qibli #winter wof #wof winter #peril wof #wof peril #darkstalker wof #wof darkstalker #squid wof #wof squid #moonwatcher wof #wof moonwatcher #pike wof #wof pike #scarlet wof #wof scarlet #flame wof #wof flame #jflxwr #jflxwr memes #jflxwr incorrect quotes #HOLY FUCK THATS A LOT OF TAGS WTFF !!!!

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Qatar Grand Prix - Parc Ferme - Oscar Piastri

#SO PRETTY!!!!!!!!! HE LOOKED SO GOOD DURING THIS #i just feel bad bcs he looks so dehyrdated and hot and dying #but at least hes sexy while doing it!! #p2....still cant believe it!!!!! #and he got so much camera time as well!!!!! so pleased!!!!! #im making these post-races differently than i normally would #i usually make one combined post but im splitting them up bcs i wanna use all my gifs #and smaller posts seem to do better for some reason so yeah!! #oscar piastri #f1 #formula 1 #formula one #we do a little bit of f1 #op81 #2023 qatar gp #2023 qatar grand prix

[skunkes]

dynamic

#a doodley #this is also why i dont think talon cld permanently replace al...i cant get any comfort from him 😭 #he'd probably tune out if i spoke more than a sentence to him #BUT sometimes u wanna care for someone.... #also idk. recent happenings have shown im the stayer i will always stay. #this is both an exploration of that in the aftermath while also having it as idk. a good thing? i do love talon...ykwim....idk #balancing it all out....al cares more for me and it makes me feel guilty in my brain -> #make a guy who you care about more than he cares about you #i do think he'd eventually ''get better'' in the sense of letting his guard down more and being just a bit more considerate #but he'd obvs never be al levels of gushy attentive caring loving open sensitive etc

[mattodore]

this is like free therapy to me

#river dipping #ts4 #theodore doe #echthroi #i’ve been pretty down today so #i’ve just been in cas spinning theo around and dressing him up and trying on different hair styles and colors yk #that bunny hat… greatest item of clothing i have ever put on him 💏 #i want to recolor that blond hair for theo btw… the brown swatches i tried didn’t look good 😞 #so. blond theo moment #or maybe i could download one of those hair overlays actually i saw one the other day 🤔 #but i think it’s a nice in between from theo’s teen 15-16 hair and his adult 22-24 hair #i need to get back to packing things tho #so this’ll just go on my list of things i wanna do #for now i’m more focused on matthias’s scars… i haven’t started them at all yet but i’ve messed around with making scars a bit #edit also sorry i haven’t went through my activity recently i’m just not feeling up to talking atm i will get to it when i feel better

[astrangerlately]

i wanna get better (strange desire) x i miss those days (gone now)

bleachers parallels [1] [2]

#literally only noticed this parallel earlier today and i was like.. drop everything make the edit now before you forget #this will be of interest to like 4 people and it is IMPERATIVE that they get their bleachers parallel content #bleachers #i wanna get better #bleachers lyrics #i miss those days #parallels #bleachers parallels #i know i was lost but i miss those days #i chase that feeling of an eighteen year old who didn't know what loss was #i miss the days of a life still permanent #these posts are always so hard to tag lmao #blue #green #tag later #cant be bothered lol i was just so excited to find this! loss AND missing those days!! plus theres the bit earlier about losing my mind #i couldnt fit it in #but thats DOUBLE lost in i wanna get better #love that jack ant man #100

[pepperpixel]

got to see the total eclipse in person!!! heres some art commemorating that! cuz getting to watch 2 celestial bodies make out sloppy style was inspiring what can i say, also it was just rlly beautiful and cool and amazing to get to see ghg- but also! its like?? basically the moon finally getting the suns undivided attention... and thats got some vibes to it,, some energies... that i could not ignore lol.

#original art #eclipse #solar eclipse 2024 #total eclipse #doodles #original #artists on tumblr #ok sorry these r probably kinda sloppy looking. 1 paintings very difficult. #and 2. my brain wouldnt let me work on other shit before finishing these but i have other shit i NEED TO DO #so im deciding they r now finished i dont wanna spend any more time on them lol #i think they turned out ok tho #i recorded the process of me drawing them too so #there might..be a speedpaint. possibly #last time i said a picture would get a speedpaint was like 2 years ago and it didnt get one cuz my computer hated me lol #but! i have a new computer now... #if i find the time / energy to make that speedpaint.. then there might be a speedpaint #we shall see lol #i kno the height difference i gave them isnt acurate at all to actual sizes. the sun is bigger #but... this is what i wanted to draw gghgh- #if it makes u feel any better i did come up w a headcanon while drawing that they can just shapeshift freely n be whatever heights they wan #right now the moons just taller #cuz i said so #also sorry they kinda resemble my tak and gaz a bit… that wasn’t intentional… I just wanted the moon to be gothy and the sun be spiky #but #they kinda do look a bit like them ghg-

[theswedishpajas]

The man truly can’t take a genuine compliment 🙄

#my art stuff #digital art #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #astarion ancunin #this is part of a series I like to call “I’m never settling on a singular detailed artstyle” #I have no consistency in drawing realistic people/characters other than my shapy cartoon style #but I truly don’t get enough opportunity to properly shade anything with art in that style-!!! it always looks weird to me-!!!!! #I think some rude lil worm in my brain is wriggling around telling me it’s a futile attempt at still doing realism #cus I’m one of those “gifted” artists that grew up promising his parents he’ll end up among the big names or whatever #constantly training to become better at art but with realism oil paintings as the goal #you know how it is 😔 #I wanna shade my lil funky designs but they never feel good enough to really put energy into or whatever so I compromise with stuff - #- like this where I try to draw characters more accurately while still stylizing them and shading them however I feel like it #which is great and all but I should really learn to give my more relaxed and less perfectionist art a chance #I deserve to enjoy the process and the result without working myself dead #it’s so much easier and rewarding to copy cartoon styles - stylizing realism makes me too anxious of doing it “wrong” #at least cartoon styles give me a goal to reach or a reference to strive towards #man I really should just cut myself some slack altogether #either way - this man is a flustered mess and he’s embarrassed about being called adorable in public or something #being teased in an affectionate way about his sweeter side and stuff #don’t ask why he’s shirtless - anatomy is just a lot more fun for me to draw sometimes #tasteful nudity and all that is extremely gorgeous to me #i need to practice anatomy more cus I just kinda did some shit and went with it this time with a BIT of consideration for muscle structure

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

#my characters #waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit #deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee #and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name #deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c #man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while #he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair #ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so #its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons #but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me #and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not #fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew #and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable #while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts #and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed #so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en #so you know maybe its that idk #and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now #and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it #and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad #that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal #and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it #the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer #anyway story time in the tags again #im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note #its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him #he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times #and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea #and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you

[seariii]

Can someone give me some love? Maybe a hug? Anything really

#i had a moment to breath and i feel like i wanna cry? i think im okay tho... #i guess i feel a little lonely- #... heh #my dad called me just as i was writing that #now i actually feel like im gonna cry but i feel a bit better #seari talks

[silenthillbunni]

🐇💭

#i've decided that after i've recovered from surgery i want a glow up!!! #i want to make an effort to try to feel better nd not be so miserable all the time. it's so draining nd soul sucking :< #nd some things i wanna do is start better habits such as journaling nd reading a chapter every morning #meditate/do mindfulness every evening. do a full body stretch routine once a day. go to the gym 3-5 times a week. #ofc daily walks in nature (i've missed that sm). spending time w my cat nd dog. getting better at studying a little bit every day #i might even bleach my hair nd dye it... i just wanna dye it one last time then im done T-T #smth im unsure of is my diet. i have no idea what i can eat nd atm im so hungry but im scared of eating. so i'll have to figure that out #nd then try to meet up w my old high school friend every now nd again #try to keep asking for help from the personality disorder psychiatric clinic... or try to get online therapy maybe??? #i just wanna feel better nd *do* smth so these r some of the thinngs i wanna try to do to feel better :3 #hopefully i'll feel better soon nd recover as swiftly as possible so i can start wanting to do these things #oh and also!! wanna try to revive my interests. such as writing more nd taking photos nd such

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix - Qualifiying - Fernando Alonso

#half asleep making these istg #yayyyy p9? idk ig i expected him to do better #old man asleep at the wheel whats new 😴 #he was very quick w this interview i wonder if he was eager to get to bed #i certainly am rn #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #2023 las vegas gp #(i wish i could atop feeling insecure abt my gifs. i do it for fun.) #(of course i want them to look somewhat good but i get a bit ill over it) #(there was somw drama on here at some point that made me want to completely stop posting then ngl) #(cause like what is the point if im not as good as others ig :/ this is kinda vague posting but it made me so uncomfortable) #(as i said. i do it for fun in quick time bcs yay jsut wanna post smth i found cute) #(but ever sincce that thing happened its just made me extremely self critical and insecure abt posting) #(idk why im saying this. kinda repressing the urge tk be like 'SRY THESE ARE TERRIBLE. YEAH.') #(i need to sleep. but i often feel like this literally every time i post now bcs some people get on their high horse and ruin people's fun) #(iykyk ig. its smth bothering me lately. but i hate to act so morose. but i still feel bad abt the quality sometimes. i guess.) #we do a little bit of f1

[piecesofchess]

Been debating redesigning Ettore this year. There are parts I love about his design, and I have yet to reveal his backstory + mask. It'll still be the same, but I'm thinking of changing him visually just a lil bit.

Kind of want to match these vibes, honestly

#this red and black bauta getup...i've saved so many pics cause it gave me huge inspiration #it was initially going to inspire a design for a new oc but #i might use it for a redesign of ettore #and i will finally draw + reveal his mask #and how he's come to work for deacon #i also wanted to do a mini project of ettore discussing the clockwork's views of the elites #i have it written out but i still kind of wanna draw it. still torn over how i wanna do it #able's design is a bit more drawing friendly although his hat bothers me but that'll be fixed with his promotion designs #i do love ettore's complicated side hanging hat thing. armada clockwork + roses??? i love him. #but i think his design is a bit too unnecessary in places and although i'd love to slap a bunch of belts on him still #i want to find a better execution #blah blah blah blah im scared of having more than 2 ocs cause i struggle doing oc work #i just never feel like i have the time

[deuynndoodles]

[id: a colored, digital drawing of vio and shadow from four swords (adventures). shadow has his arm around vio, grinning wide. vio looks back with a subdued smile, holding a book in their hand. in the background, there are cracks in a shattered mirror. end id]

cover for my vio + shadow playlist :]

#doodles #legend of zelda #loz #four swords adventures #fsa #i feel a bit iffy about this drawing—i think i couldve done better #maybe ill try again in a few months with a better skill level #but i think it works alright as is :] #i wanted to make shadow look similar to vio but i think i might also try his design again when i can do it next to the others #anyway pls enjoy the playlist im v proud of it #(violet by those who dream is on it) #some of these songs are just about shadow or just about vio #but im v conservative w my playlists and dont wanna make 3 GHSJFJD #(turned off rbs cuz i have an updated version to post! sorry for the inconvenience)

[soppsop]

i just rememberd adhd meds exist and now im upset because i could have that if it wasn't for that freakin neurologyst we went to see that told us it was impossible that i could have adhd because i have good grades in school. literally the ONLY question he asked me and immediately said it was impossible. we spent like 5 minutes there. he could've at least... explained something???? anything?????? and now i'd feel bad about asking my parents to see another neurologist because that costs a lot of money :((

#now im just unable to concentrate on anything and feeling very worthless #ok gonna start rambling here a bit #vent? -> #i'm just not good at anything except drawing. everything is hard and i don't think i'm capable of getting a job and contributing to society #in any way except drawing. my self worth is being held almost entirely by my ability to draw. #but i'm also incredibly slow and unproductive and it's so hard sitting down and starting a drawing and finishing that drawing #drawing is the thing that makes me feel alive and feel good about myself so when i can't draw i just feel really awful #i just wish i could concentrate and work and be productive man. why do i have so much stuff going on in my brain. why is everything so hard #sadge 😔😔 #ok gonna try to draw i hope something cool comes out or i'm throwing my computer out the window and playing videogames #oh also another neurologist once told me depression can't be caused by school #i'm pretty sure it can but idk im not a doctor #what is up with these neurologists man #i know it's gonna get better tho. life might suck but i *am* a teenager and it's only gonna go up from here. #im still learning about myself and stuff. also no school next year that's gonna be awesome #don't wanna end on a sad note bc life is good actually #and i'm fucking amazing at drawing