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little-alien-duck · 1 year

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the worlds most nichest post: my thoughts about what different doctor who characters rock climbing styles would be

okay the point of this is to discuss dr who characters climbing vibes. Climbing is a sport with an INSANE amount of jargon so i’m gonna try to define all of it/explain my thought process but we’ll see how that goes. Also this is written in the order of vibes which is to say that there is no order at all. Also this is not exhaustive as there are characters i don’t have any specific climbing thoughts about (yet)

first category: characters who would primarily be top-ropers

top-roping is what people often think of when they think of climbing. you’re wearing a harness which is attached to the top of the wall via long rope. there is another person on the other end of the rope belaying you (catching you if you fall). this kind of climbing is more technical and endurance based.

-liz shaw would be an EXCELLENT top-roper. super analytical and extremely determined. she would absolutely CRUSH long, technical problems. Specifically i think she’d be really good at problems with crimps (little tiny holds where you’re only using your fingertips, you have to have really good technique for these holds) and slab problems (where the top of the wall is titled back from the bottom, really balanced based and again, super technique driven)

-ian and barbara would top rope together i think. They work together on the problems and it’s very cute. They’re both SO proud when susan sends something

-tbh i think five would really enjoy belaying people. You have to be mentally engaged bc you’re watching the person you’re belaying but it’s also an easy repetitive motion which can be kinda soothing? It’s also just the ultimate Parent activity. He would be so proud of his kids (though tegan would definitely prefer bouldering over top roping. Nyssa would be really into top roping i think. Adric would focus way too much on the grade (how difficult the climb is rated) and would get really frustrated if he could do one 5.10 but then fell on a 5.9 and for this reason would have a lot of trouble actually finishing anything. He knows all the terminology and is extremely pretentious about it but spends all his time commenting on other people’s attempts instead of doing any himself)

-jo: she’s also just like a great climbing buddy. super positive and cares more about having fun than sending anything (more ppl in the gym should have this attitude)

category two: boulderers

Bouldering (my fav type in full transparency but i’ll try not to be TOO biased) is climbing on lower walls without a harness. The max wall height is generally about 15ft and if you fall, you land on a mat. If you do this outside you bring multiple (!!!) crash pads which are a little smaller than a mattress each and position them under you so if you fall that’s where you land. Outside you ALWAYS have a spotter but inside you rarely do if ever. In bouldering the individual moves are generally harder than in top-roping in that they require more power and are riskier but they’re generally less techy and far less endurance based

-charley “i’m a champion faller” pollard. self-explanatory.

-ace mcshane bc the lesbian vibes here are off the charts. seven would absolutely try to coach her on like proper technique which she completely ignores. She has the worst footwork in the world which has torn holes in the toes of her shoes bc she’s brute forcing her way through every move. LOVES dynos (short for “dynamic move” essentially it’s just a jump. in a true dyno there is a moment where no part of your body is touching the wall) and is incapable of static climbing (the opposite of dynamic climbing, slow/deliberate movements)

-bill: she isn’t actually bouldering really, she is mostly hanging out in the bouldering area bc there are cute girls here (bouldering is the favorite climbing style of douchey gym bros and women who want to show them up. There are girls doing pull-up competitions here)

-twelve was there at the beginning of bouldering in hueco tanks texas he told me himself :) this was the prime era of climbing being hippie shit so obvs he was there smoking pot with them

-eight: likes the physicality of bouldering. Also he would be doing show-offy moves like campusing (climbing without using your feet so essentially doing pull-ups through the whole climb) and knee-bars (literally jamming your knees into a good hold and using the tension between you knees and feet to keep yourself at rest, in a good knee-bar you can fully let go with your hands and just hang there). would also be really into buddy climbs (boulder problems done by two people working together. you literally have to step on/hang off of your partner and vice versa. They’re risky for obvious reasons and you only ever do them with someone you really trust. eight would love them)

Category three: lead climbing

Lead climbing is like top-roping in that you have a harness and someone belaying you except that instead of the rope being attached to the top of the wall, there are clips attached to the wall at intervals throughout the climb. As you ascend, you clip yourself in. that means that if you fall while 3ft above your last clip you fall six feet (length of rope above the clip doubled bc you are now dangling below it). Your belayer has to be paying more attention than in top-roping and it is possible to “deck” (hit the ground) if you fall from low enough

-nine and rose would be an ICONIC lead duo (she has to have an anchor when belaying him so she doesn’t go flying if he falls but still can you imagine)

-martha jones would CRUSH lead problems like they’re NOTHING. Super techy problem with little pinches and edges and insane footwork? She eats that for BREAKFAST. Essentially my reasoning here is the same reasoning i gave for liz with top-roping but martha is more of an adrenaline junkie than liz so lead over top-roping

-sarah jane would also be super into lead but would hate climbing with harry bc he’s way over protective (he’s a terrible belayer bc in an effort to make sure he is on top of the job he takes in way too much slack on the rope, accidentally making it harder for sarah to clip in)

-three and delgado!master make a really good lead duo which comes in handy during some contrived circumstance after one of the master’s plans goes awry and they’ve gotta lead climb to save the earth or whatever

cat five: free soloing

This is like bouldering only stupider (i’m biased). Free soloing is the kind of climbing that other rock climbers refer to as reckless. essentially it’s bouldering except that you climb way higher than that 15 foot ceiling i mentioned earlier. You climb like things that really should be top-rope or lead routes without a harness or any other kind of equipment (sidenote: soloing refers to a lack of safety equipment not whether or not you’re climbing with other people)

-tbh like academy era one would be into this shit. It’s risky as hell and you can be extremely pretentious about it, perfect combo for him

-jack bc he literally can’t die so might as well am i right

Deep water free soloing

This is free soloing but slightly less dangerous bc if you fall, you land in water (any kind of soloing can only be done outside for obvious reasons)

-clara: it’s all of the risk and thrills of free soloing but sexier. self-explanatory.

Speed climbing:

Literally exactly what it sounds like. This kind of climbing only exists for competition and its objective is speed and speed only. It is the only type of climbing where speed is an objective at all and if you saw climbing in the olympics, it was probably this

-ten: noodle man. look at him. he’s perfect for this. long limbs, no body weight, and the hyperactivity of a child with a caffeine addiction.

Other misc. Thoughts:

-Leela would obviously be good at climbing as an activity though i’m not sure about climbing as a sport. She would rainbow (use any holds instead of the ones for the route she was specifically climbing) literally every problem bc “the holds are there, why should I not use them?” just generally would have a difficult time with the rules of climbing as a sport not bc she doesn’t understand them, she just thinks they’re stupid

-missy would never climb as this is obviously beneath her BUT she gives really good climbing advice. She will insult you while doing it tho

-mel rotates between bouldering and top-roping to be more well-rounded (and therefore healthier) and would use the hangboard a lot (like a pull-up bar but designed to mimic small edges on climbing holds)

#I will probably continue adding to this #bc I'm insanely invested in it #can u tell I'm a rock climber with a dr who hyper fixation?#doctor who #dw

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omnivorousshipper · 11 months

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Why Fast X Works

After watching this movie twice, I can safely say it's one of my fav FF movies (nothing can beat F6 and the flip car)

Here is a list of reasons why Fast X works so well in the scope of the FFF (Fast and Furious Franchise)

Everything here is a spoiler btw

The Torettos' mom has yet to be mentioned or shown in the movies, and Fast X keeps this tradition up

Tej saying "Han, you've been dead man!" To get him back into dating is amazing. To those who haven't seen the other movies, he actually was dead

All three adults shielding Little B from Han's dating profile

All the pictures from the other movies showing how much Dom loves his family (even though there's 0% chance of a camera being available for ANY of those moments)

Roman taking on the lead role of this mission completely makes "Fast and Furious: Crossroads" canon

Cipher alone makes me want to become a lesbian

Letty alone makes me want to become a lesbian

Dante being introduced into the FFF was excuted so perfectly

Dante is the evil Queer Eye and you can't convince me otherwise

DANTE'S WHOLEASS CHARACTER

Jakob is 100% the gay uncle we all wish we had

Ramsey spouting out facts about cars is the result of her asking her gearhead gf to info dump (yes I mean Hattie)

Every action scene was basically an homage to the other movies (I can and will make another post about this)

Dante legit saying "we need to tone down the masculinity" is NOT what I was expecting from FF in 2023

Dante calling Dom "a brute" while being half a head taller and buffer

Deckard having a flip car and nobody questioning why he has it???

Gisele coming back, along with an unexpected guest: the submarine from F8!

Cipher and Letty having their own "Hobbs & Shaw" moment

Tej and Roman legit say "I love you" to each other (like no joke, this is so wholesome and a great message to all the dude bros out there)

The obvious way the crew didn't die at the end, and letting us know the next movie is coming soon

Queenie is absolutely gaslighting Dom into thinking he's one of her kids

Brian is so committed to being a house husband, you don't even get to see him or his kids again

Tess and Aims making complete fun of the franchise as newcomers is one of the best scenes in cinema

"So, what? We're all a beer and a barbecue away from joining them?"

"They're a cult with cars"

Dante taking all of the crew's money as if it wasn't his dad's money in the first place (minus Ramsey)

LUKE MOTHERFUCKING HOBBS IS BACK BABY

To sum this movie up, it's almost as if a person could have found a story like this on AO3

Basically, this whole franchise is a fanfic of itself and I'm fucking LIVING for it

#fast x #fast & furious #fast and furious #f10 #omni speaks #dominic toretto #spoilers #fast x spoilers

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cadybear420 · 9 months

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I did not care for Ride or Die.

The first time I played this story, I think it actually caused me mental distress with how poorly paced and impossible this plot was to keep up with. There were too many things going on. MC's dad should pull this plot over and give it a DUI (/j)

And I really don't buy into the "emotional bittersweet" story that people push it as. Colt (and kind of Mona too, even though she's blatantly the token female LI considering the subtitle of this story) is the only LI that I felt had enough character for me to give a shit about. But even then, MC's relationship with the Mercy Park Crew felt way too shallow for me to buy into any emotional aspects. Even with Logan's supposed special reason for showing interest in MC, which honestly I do not follow.

Also, this is easily among some of the most pointlessly genderlocked stories on the app, and unless Mona was specifically confirmed as lesbian (as far as I know, she's only canonically sapphic, but please do correct me if I'm wrong), PB should update this one to allow MC (and Logan) to be GOC.

I can kinda understand people liking this one, and I myself think it's far from being one of the worst books on the app. But what I don't get is why it's often considered one of the greatest stories? Don't get me wrong, each to their own opinion, but I don't get what makes this one so damn special.

To be fair, maybe I just need to replay this one as it's been over 2 years since I first played it, but even when I was first playing it I just... had zero interest in anything about this book except Ximena, MC's dad, and Officer Shaw.

Feel free to help me understand what made this book so special so I can judge how soon I'll replay it.

#choices #choices stories you play #choices game #choices stories we play #choices stories we play fandom #ride or die #choices rod #rod #choices ride or die

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lottieurl · 10 months

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for the ask thing: taissa for taissa Tuesday!!!

first impression: like i said i will have the hardest time with this one because i watched it when s1 was airing and i have goldfish memory. but i remember thinking she's such a capricorn and an ex friend saying something about not liking her in a way that made me just think. well do you like ME cause you just listed my traits lmao oh and i was worried about what they plan to do with her after s1 finale ngl

impression now: this might be a great moment actually to discuss my feelings on s2 tai. i'm so very torn between like. agreeing that they didn't spend enough time on tai and there are issues with how her character is handled this season and.. connecting with tai so much more than ever before. like yes modern timeline tai was very much losing her grasp on her life from the very beginning of the show but she was so deeply in denial about it and was otherwise so successful and in a way that i just can't relate to because - sorry to slightly overshare (but hey what if someone needed to know that) - i dropped out of uni and my life very much didn't and isn't ever going how i planned it so i sometimes avoid characters like this because it can ignite a bit of.. shame. i guess. in me. with that out of the way. taissa who is so afraid of falling asleep? who doesn't trust her own self and is afraid of parts of herself? tai who represses to such a degree but can no longer hide it and it's getting out of hand and she's lost and she's reaching for the person who made it better years ago? oh THAT hits

favorite moment: HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE. i mean that's what came to my mind first. the actual favourite moment i think is when she says "we hear the wilderness and it hears us" while shauna is giving birth. i think it's such a beautiful moment and it's so special and devastating and beautiful. like. i saw people call tai selfish and idk maybe i just relate to her too much and i'm just also selfish but i don't see her as selfish. she's a pragmatic and she oftentimes uses cynicism as a shield and she's really opinionated in a way that can be hurtful (like when she talks to van in s1 finale and at first is kind of shitty after van tells her about her near death experience. it's a scene i always cringe at because oh my god i was totally taissa in that moment many times in my life and i very much try not to be but yea it's kind of insensitive and kind of a know-it-all behavior and it's a character flaw that is so good i love you taissa) but like she is so protective and such a leader and she loves so fiercely when she lets herself and nothing devastates me more than thinking of her so scared for shauna's wellbeing that she's willing to do anything and pray to anyone who might be listening

idea for a story: oh i have one i am not sharing. only jas @lesbiantahani knows about that one because i'm still delusional and convinced i will write it eventually. anyway it's a wilderness tai pov thing is all i will say

unpopular opinion: idk if i have any? can't think of anything that i think is Unpopular necessarily

favorite relationship: VANTAI oh my god. i remember exactly when i decided oh i Love them when i first watched the show and it was doomcoming with tai making masks for them both to wear. i think depending on how they handle both their characters in the next seasons it could be one of my favorite canon wlw relationships really. because they are both such interesting characters in their own right which.. doesn't happen often tbh like i very rarely find both characters in a canon lesbian ship interesting enough SEPARATELY. like yes their dynamic is amazing but they'd be just as interesting if they weren't together because. how do i put it. their complexity as characters doesn't rely on each other? which i think last time i even said was about root and shaw

favorite headcanon: that tai was there for shauna when shauna was giving birth to callie <3

#its So late and this took me so long so i will reply to the other ones tomorrow #but ah THANK YOU #i need some sleep but lets all talk abt tai when i wake up #this is most def incoherent its now 4am I NEED SLEEP

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aingeal98 · 8 months

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Top five characters

Of all time would be very, very hard to answer uhh.... Hm. You know what I'm going to try anyways. I can't make any sort of ranking for them because they all occupy such huge amounts of space in my brain so let's go with the order in which I found them.

1: Valkyrie Cain

From the Skulduggery Pleasant series and perhaps the most relatable character I've ever come across. She's Irish she's bisexual she uses humour as a coping mechanism she has an ego sky high she goes through so much trauma her own reflection hates her she's just. So good.

2: Toph Beifong

From avatar the last airbender. Iconic TV show iconic character. I feel like I shouldn't even need to explain this one like she's just too cool. Joined the show late and made every moment count, she was a delight to watch. I think avatar being the first show I experienced online fandom with is part of the reason she makes the top 5, but hey, nostalgia is one hell of a drug and she was a foundational part of my childhood that helped shape all the future characters I'd come to love.

3: Willow Rosenberg

From Buffy the Vampire Slayer. My favourite little meow meow (She has no morals, unfathomable amounts of power, and the only reason she hasn't destroyed the world is because her friends are in it and they like fighting monsters together) Such a good deconstruction of the nerdy best friend archetype and also she's a lesbian. And kills misogynists. But not unless they really piss her off because her friends kind of have a whole thing about murdering other humans and she spends a lot of time trying to pretend her morals are the same as theirs.

4: Cassandra Wayne

Everyone pretend to be shocked. The whole reason I got into the batfam and dc outside of the titans. I saw that Dick had a sister who was a cooler version of Batman and never looked back. No regrets even though comics can be. Well. This whole blog is a decent summary of all my thoughts on her. Also hilariously enough she's the only person on this list who would not be OK with murder. Congrats on being the most normal one here in that regard Cass it's not something that happens to you like. Ever.

5: Sameen Shaw

From Person of Interest. Bisexual sociopath and one of the best TV characters ever created. Watch Person of Interest for Taraji P Henson in Season 1 and then Root and Shaw from season 2 onwards. Trust me it's worth it. She's everything.

Honorable mentions: Marcy Wu, Helena (Orphan Black), Rukia Kuchiki, Jinx (Arcane), Chara from Undertale actually they should probably be top 5 now that I think about it but oh well. Team RWBY, Arya Stark, Daisy Johnson, Brittany from Glee and many many more.

#ask games #too many to tag lol

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thoughts-of-the-unheard · 1 year

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my endgame parings for the 100

sorry, au where i write the 100 show and bellamy ends up with clarke because i watched the show, monty ends up with harper and doesnt die because she isn't low hanging fruit and they love each other, raven ends up with shaw because if nothing else, this girl deserves at least a modicum of happiness and nothing actually happened to wick theyre best friends and things just didnt work out, jasper ends up with shae because i dont hate him and he's been through enough, murphy ends up with emori because duh, miller ends up with jackson because theyre great together and bryan was bad, lexa does not die but falls in line behind clarke ends up befriending luna because of how clarke has changed her and if they end up together thats great but they dont have to, i wished roan lived but i understand why he didn't but lets say he also falls in line behind clarke because i feel like he could but i have no love interests for him so he could be with anyone, actually if niylah is bi i could see them getting along, if shes strictly lesbian, i could also see her with luna, hell poly group of lexa, luna, roan, and niylah where all the girls are dating luna and lexa and roan are also dating niylah but separately, octavia ends up with levitt or no one i will die on this hill because lincoln was meant for her and she is forever changed by him so if she wants levitt then levitt it is because he is the only thing about season seven i will allow, i really like her and ilian together but i guess his death was unavoidable, i still like octavia and diyoza coparenting hope because even though i wish she had a better name they are still great coparents, also abby and kane are a duh and jaha dies because i hate him, speaking of people who i hate, echo, i have no reason to change the script other than hating her but like, i do so if she dies thats great but i guess she could end up with one of diyozas men or some miscellanous grounder idc, indra and gaia having each other for the rest of their lives is fine ig bc i have no love interests for them and i feel like gaia is ace but i have no love interests for indra and i think if she loved gaias father she could love again after all the fighting is done and that she deserves someone to be with if thats what she wants

#in case anyone was wondering #this is how it is in my mind #and im ignoring everything else #also #you can all me crazy for this #but i do not trust anyone who believes bellarke is only platonic #i could not care less what jroth says #asshole btw #thats sadistic i stg #anyway #i may be delusional about some of this #but im not blind #the 100 #the 100 couples #the 100 pairings #lmk if i missed anyone #im supposed to be writing an essay and i could not move forward unless i got this out so its a total word vomit

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grendelsmilf · 9 months

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character ask meme : root and/or shaw!

gonna do both because i fucking can.!!!

ROOT

First impression: the joker for lesbians

Impression now: literally one of the best characters ever put on tv to this day just thinking about her makes me crazy

Favorite moment: every time she monologued about her nihilism & misanthropy i was on the edge of my seat like yes queen so true tell them you are such an edgy crazy genius and they will all cower at your feet!!!!!!

Idea for a story: how she faked her death to get samaritan off her trail and then came back bc she didn’t die actually. never happened

Unpopular opinion: idk if this is an unpopular opinion but I HATE when people portray her as dumb just bc she’s bubbly silly funny and goofy. she’s literally the smartest character in the show and she KNOWS it. i feel like a lot of people also just misunderstand her relationship with sameen. she’s not a simp!!! shaw flirted first!!! and like she isn’t shallow either (altho yes obv shaw is RLY hot) the reason she takes an interest in shaw is because shaw is one of the only people who is her true intellectual equal. like root is, fundamentally, a massive nerd, and she sees shaw’s huge brain first & foremost. js!

Favorite relationship: shaw & the machine (her two gfs <3)

Favorite headcanon: did not and can never die

SHAW

First impression: hhhhhhhh 🤤

Impression now: still mostly how hot she was. tbh

Favorite moment: i haven’t seen the show since it ended so i don’t remember it super clearly but whenever she was wearing a tanktop and her hair was in a ponytail and she was covered in like some blood and/or dirt i was SEATED.

Idea for a story: well i would say shaw should fuck root on a table while listening to nina simone but they already did that sooo

Unpopular opinion: idk if this is unpopular but i rly do think the show would have been so much better if john had died sometime in s2 or instead of carter in s3 and shaw had basically just taken on his role. like obviously they should’ve just beaten jim caviezel with hammers but yknow. he rly needed to be killed off the show

Favorite relationship: root obv but also that one episode where she kept flirting with carter they were so cute together. and bear<3

Favorite headcanon: i think she is one of those rare types of people who likes cats and dogs equally. but she doesn’t understand most small dogs she thinks they should just be cats

#ask #anon #character ask meme

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fantomcomics · 2 years

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What’s Out This Week? 10/12

Anything can happen on Hal-lo-ween It’s better than a vi-de-o Gremlins going to mess up every cas-sette From Lon-don to I-da-ho

Chilling Adventures Of Salem one-shot - Cullen Bunn & Dan Schoening

Salem the Cat has always been known as Sabrina's familiar, but what happens when Sabrina's not around to protect him (or, as is more the case, when he doesn't have to protect her)? This special one-shot explores a different side of Salem's life, one in which he acts as an anti-hero enacting vigilante justice on those who hurt others like him... animals, in a horror story that's equal parts Pet Sematary and Hereditary.

Black & White: Tough Love At The Office GN Vol 1 - Sal Jiang

Sparks (and fists) fly in this violent yuri love story. Shirakawa Junko is an upstanding employee of a high-level bank. Her colleagues all respectfully admire her... except for Kuroda Kayo, a colleague who's transferred to her department. Shirakawa is supposed to train Kuroda, and it does not go well. These women have a bizarre love-hate relationship that results in either violent office attacks or angry lesbian sex. When a sinister conspiracy seems to be afoot at their bank, can these two stop having bruised hate-sex on piles of documents and work together to investigate? This provocative LGBT+ drama is ready to rumble.

Approach #1 (of 5) - Jeremy Haun, Jason A. Hurley & Jesus Hervas

When airport employees Mac and Abigail find themselves snowed in after a blizzard, they witness a terrible plane crash. After pulling a survivor from the wreckage, they realize a terrifying truth: this plane has been missing for 27 years!

The nightmare has only just begun though, as the people trapped in the airport soon find themselves confronted by what this plane actually brought back.... For those with a fear of flying... it's not the sky that deserves dread, but what lies beyond it...

DanDaDan GN Vol 1 - Yukinobu Tatsu

Momo Ayase strikes up an unusual friendship with her school's UFO fanatic, whom she nicknames "Okarun" because he has a name that is not to be said aloud. While Momo strongly believes in spirits, she thinks aliens are nothing but nonsense. Her new friend, however, thinks quite the opposite. To settle matters, the two set out to prove each other wrong-Momo to a UFO hotspot and Okarun to a haunted tunnel! What unfolds next is a beautiful story of young love...and oddly horny aliens and spirits?

Sensory: Life On The Spectrum GN - Bex Ollerton

From artist and curator Bex Ollerton comes an anthology featuring comics from thirty autistic creators about their experiences of living in a world that doesn't always understand or accept them. Sensory: Life on the Spectrum contains illustrated explorations of everything from life pre-diagnosis to tips on how to explain autism to someone who doesn't have it, to suggestions for how to soothe yourself when you're feeling overstimulated. This book depicts these varied experiences with the kind of insight that only those who have lived them can have.

She Love To Cook, & She Loves To Eat GN Vol 1 - Sakaomi Yuzaki

Cooking is how Nomoto de-stresses, but one day, she finds herself making way more than she can eat by herself. And so, she invites her neighbor Kasuga, who also lives alone. What will come out of this impromptu dinner invitation...?

Samurai 2.0 #1 (of 4) - Marcello Bondi & Mauro Gulma

The year is 21XX. World War III has devastated the planet. A foreigner arrives in the city of Neo-Tokyo. His name is Ketsuo, and he is the last remaining graffiti samurai, intent on clashing with the Emperor, who has prohibited any artform and persecutes anyone who dares to create. In the year 2022, a series from Action Lab arrives at Antarctic Press, where we dare to create!

Legacy Of Violence #1 - Cullen Bunn & Andrea Mutti

A Legacy of Violence, by masters of horror Cullen Bunn and Andrea Mutti, with letters by Rus Wooton, follows Dr. Nick Shaw; an honest doctor just trying to help people. But one day, when a patient gets out of control, Nick suddenly begins recalling past memories he had kept hidden away. That's when he decides to join Doctors Without Borders and heads straight for Central America. But his past still comes calling. With a serial killer on the loose in the small town of Disante, Honduras, Nick's flashbacks begin to intensify-and become clearer. Was Nick meant to go to Honduras? Is this all part of the killer's plan? Find out what Nick has been repressing all these years and why.

Hyperventilation GN - Bboung Bbang Kkyu

Myongi and Sunho haven't seen each other since they were 18 years old. Now 27, they run into one another at a high school reunion, and the romantic feelings they had for one another come rushing to the surface. But are they the same people now that they were back then?

Hitomi #1 (of 5) - H.S. Tak, Isabella Mazzanti & Valentina Napolitano

In Feudal Era Japan, a drifter with no prospects begins training in secret under Yasuke, a once-famous, displaced, disgraced warrior, as she struggles to find her place in a society entrenched in discrimination and violence.

Combining the historical sweep and elegance of Kurosawa with the visceral action of Tarantino, this saga follows the trials and tribulations of a young female warrior who travels the countryside unendingly as she works to gain the rank of Samurai-a title no man, monster, or myth can give to her, but one that she will have to take for herself.

Slumber TP Vol 1 - Tyler Burton Smith, Vanessa Cardinali, Simon Robins & Becky Cloonan

We all have nightmares. What if you could pay somebody to enter your dreams and shoot that nightmare in the goddamn face? That's where Stetson comes in. She's a nightmare hunter. A dream detective. She enters her clients' dreams through a door, investigates their dreamscapes, and kills their nightmares. But Stetson's past comes back to haunt her as she tracks down a nightmare serial killer responsible for the mysterious death of her daughter.

SHWD GN Vol 1 - sono.N

A slick and action-packed yuri tale about two special agent women fighting supernatural horrors! The year is 20XX. Tough but idealistic Koga has just joined the Tokyo branch of SHWD, the Special Hazardous Waste Disposal unit responsible for eradicating mysterious biological weapons that were left behind after the great war. Her mentor is Sawada, a woman with a powerful psyche who complements Koga's physical prowess. Something is sizzling between the two of them, and it's more than just a shared mission. Together, these two badass women must team up to confront horrors beyond their wildest nightmares.

The Sword Of Hyperborea HC - Mike Mignola, Rob Williams & Laurence Campbell

From the ancient warrior Gall Dennar, to Sir Edward Grey, to the B.P.R.D.'s Agent Howards, the iconic Hyperborean sword from the world of Hellboy has landed in many influential hands. And this has been no accident. Trace the sword's path through the adventures and encounters that finally brought it to Ragna Rok, at the end of the world, and witness the sword's journey through history.

Whatcha scooping up this week, Fantomites?

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smokeybrandreviews · 3 months

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Monster Mash

The final episode of Monarch: Legacy of Monsters is in the books and it has been one hell of a ride. This show had no right to be as good as it was. Seriously, Monarch was a solid, refreshing, little entry that squeaked in just before the end of the year and I’m glad it did. Obviously, it’s not highbrow, intellectual fair but it is very well written, with strong characters, great performances, outstanding effects, and a whole ass realized world. I have my issues, of course. Off the top, I don’t like any of the original monsters being introduced by the Monsterverse. These things suck balls, every last one of them. Admittedly, this is an overall Monsterverse thing, not just a Monarch show thing. The US is just so uninspired with their kaiju design, always has been. Ren Watabe is kind of awful and doesn’t have the acting ability to carry such an emotionally involved role. Also, this thing just blows open gaping plot holes and raises so many questions about all of the content which came before. I like a lot of the “revelations”, I just wish they were integrated with the established lore better. There’s only a handful of films. You can’t be f*cking up that narrative like this so soon. Those are minor gripes, of course, because Monarch has been a beacon of what streaming originals can be and it has found a pretty broad audience because, and this is kind of the point of this essay, the lead is a lesbian Japanese woman and no one seems to care.

You would be forgiven if you thought this was Kurt and Wyatt Russell’s show, the marketing pushes that narrative strong, but you would be wrong. This show is about the Randa siblings, Cate and Kentaro. The aforementioned disappointment, Ren Watabe plays Kentaro but, in direct contrast to his flaccid performance, Anna Sawai plays his half-sister Cate, and she is the engine that makes this show go. You watch Cate’s character develop, spend so much time with her, learn so much about it. This is HER show and it never she’s away from who she is, which is kind of remarkable because Cate kind of checks every box of diversity bingo. Woman? Yessir. Japanese? You betcha! Lesbian? Check. Overtly carrying romantic feelings for Kiersey Clemons’ bisexual May? Check, again. Also, May is black. Just wanted to throw that in there for reference. Oh, and she basically left Kentaro FOR Cate, too. You’d think having a queer relationship presented front-and-center in the middle of A-spec Goji content would get all the neckbeards in a tizzy, but I haven’t heard a single peep. But the representation doesn’t stop there. The leader of Monarch is a woman. Mari Yamamoto plays the Randa siblings grandmother, Keiko, and she’s also a founding member of Monarch, itself. Michelle Duvall, Sandra Brody’s sister, is this bad ass Monarch operative who goes rouge with Lee Shaw, eventually taking over his band of defectors after the good Colonel goes missing for the second time. This show is riddled with POC, queer, and female representation. By all means, it’s woke as f*ck and no one has said a word. Why? Because it’s f*cking good.

I will dies on this hill, man. There is no such thing as “Go Woke, Go Broke.” There is not Superhero fatigue. The issue is that this stuff is poorly written. Identity politics can encapsulate your entire goddamn narrative, as long as you write it well. Your lead characters can be two, gay ass, men, as long as the character work is there to make those aspects part of who they are, not define them as a whole. I’m speaking, specifically, about The Last of Us. They did that sh*t twice, actually. Nick Offerman’s episode as some of the strongest television I have ever seen in my entire goddamn life. It was beautiful It was tragic. It was inspired f*cking television. That’s how you do representation and identity on television for the wide audience. That’s what Monarch has done with Cate and May. That’s what we need to see more of out of Disney, Lucasfilm, and the MCU. There has to be nuance when developing these characters and stories. They have to feel real, not just performative checkboxes for Xitter clout. You’re always going to have Neckbeards upset that The Force is Female, but don’t feed the trolls with more lazy characters like Rey. Write better ones who line up closer to Ahsoka and Dr. Aphra. Interestingly enough, Chelli is also a queer woman of visibly Asian descent. An just like that, we’ve come full circle! Monarch: Legacy of Monsters is a great show. It’s probably the best thing The Monsterverse has produced to date, and it did so while incorporating a ton of diversity, without alienating the entire audience. That, alone, I think, is worth a watch. And, more to the point, worth the entirety of Hollywood taking note. We need more shows like this, Atlanta, Beef, Reservation Dogs, and The Brothers Sun. It’s not hard to write “Woke” content for the masses, as long as what you write is organic and true to the characters. No one wants to be preached at or pandered to. Monarch towed that line beautifully and every follow it’s example.

#Monarch: Legacy of Heroes #Monsterverse #Godzilla

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smokeybrand · 3 months

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Monster Mash

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sebastianshaw · 3 years

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“ He him lesbian shaw” is a phrase that just got said for like the third or fourth time on one of the Discord servers I’m in and it never stops short circuiting my brain

#NO THEY ARE NOT SERIOUS #NO ONE ACTUALLY THINKS SHAW IS A LESBIAN #out of shirt

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hearteyesandviolence · 3 years

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All My Ships At Sea

My All Timers  

Korrasami:

Will never forget the moment after I watched the finale, just sitting in the dark, unable to believe I'd actually just seen what I'd just seen. Still get chills when I re-watch it.

Clexa

We've all got our war stories from this one. But it wouldn't have hurt so bad if the highs weren't so high.

Sanvers

This one ended up breaking my heart too, but I can't claim I didn't love the ride while it lasted, and one of the most meaningful coming out stories I've ever watched.

Cophine

Two lovely human beings who are able to convey yearning as memorably as I've ever seen it done.

Goodfoe/Shoni

It feels wrong to put them here when it's still so early. But I don't think I've felt this way about a ship since the heyday of Clexa

Harley/Ivy

Already loved it in the comics, but the show made it something so real, I’m so pumped for season 3.

 The Also Great

Hollstein

This one is really, really close to being in the all time greats. I think maybe if I liked season 3 more they'd be in there....as it stands, they're probably the best of the rest....for now.

Nysara

So, here's the thing. You wanna say Avalance is the better ship, I will not only not argue with you, I will agree with you. They have more development, more great moments, and I adore Ava Sharpe. But Nysara is always going to be the one for me. Nyssa the heartbroken lesbian is always going to be one hell of an image to me.

Catradora

I have some issues with this one that I might get into later, but I also think they're two of the best characters in animation in the past decade, and seeing them together can't help but feel powerful.  

Scorpia/Perfuma

My only issue with this one is we didn’t get to see more of them

Amy/Hope

I actually wish Booksmart had been a series so we could have gotten a proper slowburn between these two. Doesn't mean I didn't near swoon when they kissed. An all time great high school ship.

Nico/Karolina

I haven't properly finished Runaways, so this probably more belongs in the category below. But what I have seen, I love.

Jenny/Vastra

It's a lizard lady and her wife/maid fighting crime in Victorian England with katannas. I'm not above that.  

Jamie/Dani

Yes, I watched, and yes, I became a puddle.

Bubbline

This one straddles the line between this category and the next, as I'm in and out with Adventure Time. But I've seen most of the important bits and I know I like what I see.

Haven’t Actually Watched The Show But I Still Ship Them Real Hard

Wayhaught:

Confession, I’ve yet to actually watch a full episode. But I’ve seen pretty much every Wayhaught scene, plus enough of the rest to fall a little in love with Wynonna herself. Still. Sorry. But they’re all amazing

Cazzie:

Again, only watched their parts, but I'm honestly not sure I've ever seen high school friends to lovers done better.

Curious Archer

I bailed on OUAT before these two showed up, but I've watched every scene they were in, and it just makes me wish they'd somehow brought them in 3 seasons earlier. 15 minutes or so worth of screen time after 7 seasons isn't nearly enough, but it’s certainly something. And they’re so effing cute.

Root/Shaw

This is a show I know I'd enjoy if I gave it a shot, but I just haven't sat down to yet, and now I've spoiled most of the final season for myself because I couldn't help but watch everything to do with these two.

  The Straights Jake And Amy

I’ve come to have pretty mixed feelings about rooting for cops, but I’ll always think these two had one of the healthiest and most engaging sitcom relationships.   Ray and Nora

An adorable couple on and off screen that didn’t get enough time. These two getting such a raw deal is one of the things that’s zapped my enthusiasm from LOT

Gareth/Madelena

Don't think a lot of folks watched Galavant, or there'd be more of it, but if you want to see the cutest villain ship I've ever seen, check it out.

Guilty Pleasures

Choni

They fall short of being in my also greats for a couple reasons. One, I'm just But the main one is the treatment of Toni as a character. She has no life outside of Cheryl, something the actress is made known she is not ok with, and using an actress of color to be a prop for a white girls story is something that needs to END.All that said....they're really fucking adorable, and I have a soft spot for "Ice Queen who shows a soft spot to her girlfriend".

Ruby Slippers

This falls under guilty pleasure for the simple fact that it's rushed and doen't justify the buildup. It was supposed to be Mulan and Ruby, and everybody knows it, but instead we got rush job of a love story to throw a bone to the queer following.

That said....I kind of adore them. Maybe it hit me at a moment when i just needed something, maybe it's cause Ruby was always my favorite OUAT character, or maybe it's just cause Meghan Ory acted the hell out this episode, really selling that she's suddenly totally in love with a girl she's known for 3 minutes. It worked on me....but no one tell Disney. They're not allowed to feel good about this.

Anyway.....that’s my ships....you know, if you were wondering.

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enviroexpression · 2 years

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WLW tv recs

Ok, so these are my personal favorites that probably have a similar, more ‘mature’, vibe like Leyren.

(Link in titles)

Maggie & Sydney (Saving Hope)

These two are VERY similar to Leyren, imo. Maggie is one of the main characters and served a similar position in the ensemble as Lauren being the ‘reckless’ one that needed to get her personal life together, and Sydney came in season 3 as the unique recurring love interest that took her by surprise.

(looks like the videos in the playlist can get a bit out of order, so look out for that)

Root & Shaw (Person of Interest)

Person of Interest actually became one of my all time favorite shows. I started watching because I had heard about this potential pairing, but I became obsessed with the whole thing. Root is introduced at the end of season 1, is recurring in season 2, and then is a regular from 3 on, and Shaw is introduced mid-season 2 and becomes a regular from 3 on. If you find yourself liking the vibe, I highly recommend the show. The first season is meh, then half of season 2 is incredible, and then from 3 on its truly high quality and some of my top favorite tv ever. Their story might not make a ton of sense without the greater context of the show, but I’m sure you’d still enjoy it.

Pepa & Silvia (Los Hombres de Paco)

This was a random show in Spain like... nearly 15 years ago, but I was watching their story at the time thanks to people subbing and I just adored everything about them. (tragic but beautiful ending)

(go to the channel to see all the parts. I think they sometimes don’t sub parts without the girls in it, but it should all have english subs)

Jamie & Dani (The Haunting of Bly Manor)

A good show on Netflix if you’re okay with gothic romance type stories. Not really scary, but ghosts are involved. This couple was a surprise and one of the most lovely things I’ve ever witnessed. I would recommend just watching the show since it’s so short and I can’t really find their romantic scenes edited out (they’re the lead characters). They had/have a massive fandom on tumblr, so there’s lots of great content when you’re done. Also, The Haunting of Hill House (technically the first season, but they’re separate stories) is brilliant and has a lesbian main character too.

Yorkie & Kelly (Black Mirror 3x04 - San Junipero)

Black Mirror is an anthology show on Netflix, so each episode is like its own separate movie (just go there to watch the full thing). This episode is a masterpiece and a wlw classic.

Juliana & Valentina (Amar a Muerte)

I think they’re one of the first lesbian couples on a Mexican telenovela. Or at least one that was able to show affection (they actually cut most of their intimate scenes, but they shared them separately online later). Very sweet. Some similarities to Leyren--almost as if it’s Lauren and Leyla meeting as teenagers. The first half of their story is a beautiful love story on their own, but then they get swept up in the bizarre larger plot of the show and it gets kinda weird, but the first half is beautiful and totally worth watching.

(the last video on that drive is the full story)

Alex & Maggie (Supergirl)

I don’t really care for coming out stories, but they did a nice job with this one and the actresses had great chemistry. Sadly the recurring one, Maggie, left because the actress got better work, but I still think they were great while they lasted.

(link is first part, go to channel and scroll through to find each part. sadly not a playlist)

Cosima & Delphine (Orphan Black)

A good show on its own, so I’d recommend it. This relationship kinda gets wonky in the middle, but they get a happy ending.

Cristina & Isabel (Tierra de Lobos)

Girl falls in love with her father’s prostitute. Tale as old as time, right? Not a very happy story, and the second half is... brutal, but there was something about them I’ve always loved.

Jenny and Emma (Hand Aufs Herz)

Probably my top comfort ship. It’s a cheesy, dated German soap that was trying to be like a cheap version of Glee, but these two... they make it worth it. Top 3 personal favorites, but I understand they might not hold up for a lot of people.

(Playlist might not go all the way through, so you might have to use the ‘all vidoes’ section of the user)

Petra and JR (Jane the Virgin)

They’re just cute. And hot. There was also another lesbian couple on the show (Luisa and Rose), but while they were also very hot, they weren’t really one you ended up rooting for.

Quinn and Isabela (Harlem)

A show on Amazon you might like. These two haven’t really taken off yet, but it was picked up for a season 2 so I’m hoping that’s what Quinn’s story will mainly be about now. They cute.

Florencia & Jazmin (Las Estrellas)

An Argentinian telenovela about 5 sisters with different mothers but the same father inheriting a hotel when he dies that they have to run successfully for a few years together in order to actually get anything from his will. Florencia is one of the sisters who has tourettes and falls for the redheaded hotel cook, Jazmin. It’s campy and dramatic, as any good telenovela is, but unlike the others they got the same treatment for intimate scenes and screentime in general, so they were a really big deal.

And then movies I would recommend:

Kyss Mig (’With Every Heartbeat’ in english)

A really beautiful well made romantic drama (from Sweden I think). Before ‘Portrait of a Lady on Fire’ I thought this was the best quality film we’d had so far.

Imagine Me & You

Probably the best (and only) true classic rom-com. It’s iconic.

Portrait of a Lady on Fire

Just... brilliant. This is one you need to really sit and be present for.

The Half of It (Netflix movie)

Cute teen romance movie. We’re all hoping there will be a second one but who knows with Netflix.

The World to Come

It’s a harsh movie, but it makes their romance more beautiful. I hate the ending with a fiery passion... so I just pretend it didn’t happen.

Gia

Angelina Jolie and Elizabeth Mitchell. Enough said.

Desert Hearts

A classic, and one of the only older movies we have with a happy ending.

D.E.B.S

Super campy but a lesbian cult classic.

Carol

I would categorize it more under a movie about gay people but for straight people, like most things, but still stunning cinema and beautifully well made. Nothing to really dislike about it.

Saving Face

Cute, and refreshingly not about white people.

Summerland

HUGE Lauren and Leyla vibes. Just with eccentric writers, not doctors.

There’s lots more I can recommend, but these are my favorites.

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bao3bei4 · 3 years

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girlbosses, male wives, and other lesbian genders

a post about jing wei qing shang. but also mostly about another unrelated movie. spoiler-free.

for a lot of people, mulan 1998 is their definitive “ohhh i’m a chinese woman dressing as a man for contrived reasons and i get absolutely nooo erotic pleasure from this” movie.

however, because i am very special and unique, for me it’s the love eterne 1963. it’s the shaw brothers adaptation of butterfly lovers, the classic chinese folktale. here’s how i’d summarize the movie:

zhu yingtai, an aspiring scholar, convinces her parents to let her dress as a man to attend school. on the way there, she meets liang shanbo, another prospective student, and they become sworn brothers. they study together for three years, growing closer, until zhu yingtai returns home. liang shangbo accompanies her for the eighteen-li journey home while she hints she’s a woman, but he remains oblivious. by the time he learns her gender, her parents have engaged her to another man. he dies of grief, and while she mourns at his grave, it splits open, and she buries herself inside with him. two scraps of her torn outfit turn into butterflies and fly away.

it’s worth noting here that like. this movie is made in the huangmei opera style. so both zhu yingtai and liang shanbo are played by women (betty loh ti and ivy ling po respectively). because of this, basically every level of the film is preoccupied with gender: if we take zhu yingtai’s male performance as credible (as the characters in the movie do) the leads bond through male homoeroticism; the text is ultimately about a heterosexual romance; it is acted out by two women, in a performance that is difficult to mistake as heterosexual or even feminine; and the dialogue of the movie can’t help but remark on this.

basically it asks: what if lesbians could be gay both ways? wouldn’t that be based?

like opera was traditionally made by single gender casts, so roles tended to be genderless, in that the gender of the actor doesn’t determine the gender of the role they play. roles are instead typed into four categories: dan (fem), sheng (masc), chou (clown), and jing (painted face). it’s a sick gender quadinary. each of these roles has further subtypes that are represented through stylized patterns of singing, makeup, costuming, movement etc.

so in butterfly lovers, betty loh ti plays a dan, and ivy ling po plays a sheng. but because of the textual cross-gender play, you end up with a woman playing a woman playing a man who falls in love with a woman playing a man.

i’m going to make a brief digression here into talking about like.. acting theory. in the european tradition, you see it evolving out of early concerns (from stanislavski, brecht) about the fourth wall, and its permeability or lack thereof. in chinese opera tradition, the fourth wall didn’t ever really exist. and mei lanfang, the legendary fanchuan performer, claimed that his success wasn’t just due to his appearance, but rather, his mastery of some nonliteral feminine subjectivity.

If I kept my male feelings, even just a trace, it will betray my true self; then how can I compete for the audience’s affection for feminine beauty and guile?

i’m not going to argue that there’s like, an essence to being a woman because i’m not a fucking idiot. but there’s something to be said for the idea that the gendered interplay between the audience’s perception of the actor, the actor’s perception of themself, and the character they play is a massive part of the appeal of fanchuan performance.

this is echoed by david hwang’s m. butterfly, in which gallimard memorably says, “i’m a man who loved a woman created by a man. everything else—simply falls short.” btw sorry for having the type of brain disease where i constantly reference chinese crossdressing related media. you already know why i have it.

anyway. parallel to that (but far less morally detestably), jin jiang argues “young male impersonators in yue opera embody women’s ideal men—elegant, graceful, capable, caring, gentle, and loyal.” so, trivially, 1) the eroticism embodied by fanchuan performers is distinctly different from their “straight” counterparts, and perhaps less trivially 2) it’s way better.

back to the love eterne for a bit. one of the many reasons it’s lodged itself into my psyche is because there’s something more interesting at play than just all that. normally in opera, to compensate for any perceived residual femininity in the sheng, the dan camps it up even further. so this is how zhu yingtai first appears, this bratty femme pastiche of womanhood. yet within a couple minutes she’s dressed as a man, which she’ll stay as for the bulk of the movie. they do however make compromises with the makeup--more gently lifted eyebrows than the steep angles of the sheng opera beat, and an improbably masculine smoky eye.

that’s right. they performed girlbossification on her.

i don’t want to suggest that she’s straightforwardly feminine. i could write an entire other thing on her relationship to masculinity. instead i want to highlight the erotic interplay not just between the “girl” and the “boss” but also between her and her counterpart: the male wife.

liang shanbo is ostensibly straightforwardly male, but his relationship with zhu yingtai isn’t gay in the ahaha what if i was into my bro way-- it’s a what if i was into my bro and i was his wife way.

that’s right. they performed force fem on a cis woman-man. like when zhu yingtai tells him he can’t watch over her as she recovers from an illness because “boys and girls can’t sleep together,” liang shanbo asks “are you implying that I’m a girl?”

there’s a lot of shit like this that builds up over the course of the movie. it all culminates in that final 18 mile journey. along the way, zhu yingtai compares them to a pair of mandarin ducks, one male & one female. liang shanbo sputters “i am a man inside out-- you shouldn’t--” before graciously conceding, “you may compare me to a woman.”

this is like. a simple punchline. but it’s incredible. it’s true! liang shanbo isn’t a man inside out in that he’s a man and only a man, but rather that he’s a man seen inside first, built for desiring, by a woman & for a woman. as a perpetual object, he becomes a more believable woman than zhu yingtai. and at least in his view, it seems more likely that he could be a woman than her. but beyond that, his permissive tone reads as a kind of wanting in itself--recast, if she wants, “for you, i’ll be a woman.”

obviously this is a classic lesbian mood. who among us has not seen “no gender only lesbian” posts. and speaking of classic lesbians, you might ask. did you just tiresomely reinvent butches and femmes but with a more annoying name? yes. no. okay. well.

first, like butch/femme dynamics have both historical specificity and a classed character such that it’s not rlly that appropriate to impose them on the love eterne. and i guess more importantly, i wanna talk about stuff that isn’t real.

we fight all day about people who confuse performance with performativity, (i use we lightly here. for instance, i go outside every day so i don’t care about discourse) but what if we actually wanted to talk about the former for once? something specifically, whether we choose or are forced into it, that we pretend to be?

anyway. what the hell does all that have to do with jing wei qing shang. i’m going to start by first making the argument that there’s no such thing as a naturally occurring girlboss. i think, honestly, she’s a product of capitalism (“boss” should be the tipoff here) but because both of these stories are set in ambiguously historical china, i’m going to say, instead that she’s a product of uhhh primitive accumulation.

semantics so that i can be canon compliant with marxism aside, if girlbosses are made not born, can you choose to be a girlboss? sheryl sandberg says yes. i don’t disagree, i guess, but i will say: stop glamorizing it! humans only become girlbosses when they’re greatly distressed.

you become a girlboss when you have no other choice not to be one. when your wants are too great to be a woman, when the things you want are not things that women should want-- whether that’s something that really no one should want, like being a ceo, or whether that’s just something like loving a woman (or, as it is quite often, both) -- you have to become something else.

another important part of being a girlboss is that other people are not. your excesses mean that not only do you lose something in the process, but your bosshood comes at the expense of others. the girlboss necessitates a girlworker, or so to speak.

now we’re getting to jwqs. i’m assuming that you haven’t read jwqs, because most people haven’t. that was me until like four days ago. in broad strokes, the novel is about a woman, qiyan agula, who was raised as a prince, and her quest for revenge against the kingdom who slaughtered her people. of course, this involves marrying one of the princesses of that kingdom. it’s all very exciting (lesbian).

what’s striking about jwqs is that both of them seem to fit the girlboss paradigm, in vaguely similar ways. qi yan (agula’s assumed name) seems to follow the lineage of zhu yingtai, who pretends to be a man to achieve her goals. she’s forced to give up much in the process, and also sacrifices a, uh, lot of innocent people. similarly, nangong jingnu, the princess, is inherently a girlboss because royalty sucks. but also, qi yan girlbossifies her over the course of their relationship.

but i wouldn’t say jwqs is girlboss4girlboss. there’s something a little more complicated happening. qi yan isn’t zhu yingtai in that she’s a dan pretending to be a sheng. it seems more like that she was a sheng all along. it’s something that the women of the novel return to often: qi yan seems to be better than a man.

for instance, nangong sunu, jingnu’s older sister, reflects on this.

Nangong Sunu had seen many foolishly loving women who sacrificed everything for the sake of their husbands, but there were rarely any men who would do the same for them.

(...)

Thinking it through, Nangong Sunu felt that Qi Yan was truly becoming more interesting. She intended to observe discreetly for a while, to verify if such a man truly existed in this world. (ch 221)

and i forgot to write down the citation for this, but nangong jingnu also seems to argue that not only is qi yan prettier than a man, but she also seems to be prettier than a woman. (it’s the bit where she’s watching qi yan sleep. help me out here.)

moreover, the way qi yan relates to nangong jingnu is suggestive. jingnu brings out the elements of wanting to be a woman in her. it’s jingnu’s body that makes her wonder what she would look like if she was more feminine. it’s jingnu’s happiness that she resents, wishing that her people could have that as well. it’s her desire for jingnu that makes her a woman.

(another important distinction i suppose--while one person can’t be both a butch and a femme, because the girlboss and the male wife are things we pretend to be until we embody them / them us -- there’s greater slippage between the two.)

anyway, the girlboss/male wife dynamic is reversed wrt who’s actually dressing as a different gender. that suggests an inversion in the implications we see from the love eterne, if we are to take the love eterne as the paradigmatic girlboss text. which i do, for no reason in particular.

so then, is qi yan pretending to be a man? under the opera framework, we’re forced to say no. she’s not pretending to be a man any more so than liang shanbo (as acted by ivy ling po) was. but that, of course, feels incorrect, just looking at the text. is she, then, pretending to be a sheng? i’d strongly say no. the things that others see in her, they authentically see; and she does authentically feel the same things as liang shanbo wrt femininity.

so it has to be the opera framework that jwqs is subverting then. if qi yan kept some trace of her once-womanhood, if qi yan reveals her true self, and yet she still can compete for the audience’s affection-- jwqs’s inversion of the opera framework seems to argue instead that it’s that true self that allows you to compete. it’s being masc that lets you be a desirable woman; it’s being feminine that lets you be a desirable man.

there’s an increased gender ambivalence to jwqs, which make sense, i guess, seeing as it’s not meant to be a het story the way that the love eterne was. for instance, nangong jingnu crossdresses to go out in public, and qi yan remarks that jingnu’s disguise fooled her on their first meeting. when qi yan and jingnu go out in public, both disguised as men, they’re repeatedly perceived as a gay male couple. there’s freedom in that: they could be gay women only privately, they could be straight officially, but they could be anonymously gay publicly.

so it’s through the gay male pretense that they can be gay women; it’s through the qi yan pretense that agula can love women; it’s the qi yan caring husband persona that coaxes jingnu in caring for qi yan in return-- jwqs, more precisely, argues that you can’t be a woman if you’re going to love them, and even less so if you’re going to be loved by one.

this is perhaps well-trodden ground for anyone who has read wittig & certainly many people who haven’t. but it’s the layer of pretense that for me complicates these two narratives.

i think it’s a relatable feeling: wanting something anticipating getting something, or wanting something for yourself anticipating knowing that you already had it. that is, desire in itself being constitutive of that reality.

or less abstractly, knowing that you’d want to be a lesbian if you could, knowing that you’d want not to be a woman if you could-- anticipating any realization of either.

the dramatic excesses & wants of the girlboss, i think, are a decent literary stand in for being a lesbian.

i wanna note here that this is rlly just based on my experience being a transmisogyny exempt nonbinary diaspora lesbian lol. it’s fun & cathartic to overread this history & place myself in the accidental implications.

i don’t think most of the things i say are literally true. and i don’t want to overstep & say any of this can be generalized. please lmk if something here doesn’t read right! ok kisses bye

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