#Realizing this is part of growing up

[yugiohz]

'there has to come a time in your adult life when you make watching the news, keeping up with politics, taking a stance in big, current discourses a habit' lol no there doesn't. you can just not do it. and no amount of internet people saying it makes you a bad person will stop it. making myself sick with grief for strangers on the daily does not actually help those strangers. terrible things have always happened and it's only the modern worldwide information network making us aware of it in real time now. humans were not meant to live this way. if you have the ability to help and give of yourself then do that but if you can't then it doesn't make someone a bad person to focus on their own life rather than the global tragedy of the day

you think you can live in isolation from the rest of the world and yet you send me a message trying to communicate your anger with me

#that’s a miserable life you’re living if anyone outside your micro cosmos if a nameless faceles irrelevant stranger to you #and this safety bubble you crave obviously doesn’t exist #I’m a stranger to you and yet my message affected you #confronting others people and your complicity in global events in inevitable #Realizing this is part of growing up #and your petty ask just further emphasizes my point 🙏 #asks

[egophiliac]

ENG PLAYERS I BESEECH YOU

I have been informed that you guys are getting part 4 of episode 7 tomorrow, which means we are FINALLY going to get the official romanization of Revaan's name, somebody please tell me because I need to know what it is.

like, yes, it's probably just Revan/Levan, but look, I'm sitting here with my finger over the button of all these Laverne and Shirley jokes and just waiting for the opportunity to deploy them --

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 5 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 part 5 spoilers #(not me realizing that meleanor doesn't actually appear non-silhouetted until part 5 so uhhhhh. whoops.) #(i know a bunch of you read the spoiler-tagged stuff though so i'm putting my life in your hands) #revan would be the funniest one i think because it's just raven but with the vowels switched and i'd be over here going WHAT COULD IT MEAN #anyway i'm here to give the people what they crave and it's obviously references to 70s american sitcoms that spun off of happy days #mork and grimdy. i-is that anything. #the problem of course is now that i might have to actually come up with a bunch of laverne and shirley jokes #when i haven't...actually watched it in a million years #(my personal pool of media i consumed growing up is a good 60% made up of random things i found to watch at 3 am because of insomnia) #(this probably explains a lot about me) (the opinions about zorro adaptations anyway) #hold on let me marathon all eight seasons and -- wait i'm just now finding out there was also an animated series #in which they joined the army and their sergeant was a literal cartoon pig but also they went to space and fought giant gorillas? #but how does boo boo kitty factor into this

[elodieunderglass]

I’m glad to be included in gender, and it’s an honor to trans your gender, but gender is astrology to me. “Girl sun boy moon.” You don’t agree, but now you get me better. Send post

#super super fun and everyone likes to look themselves up #but we made it all up yeah? #it’s like holidays yeah? #and then you learn more about (being very serious here) #there are living cultural practices that take astrology very seriously #and set up aspects of real world material oppression around your birth chart #(I was educated by a good friend on how astrology is handled in other cultures than my own) #which is also like gender: all in good fun until you realize people are taking it so seriously #that little kids are growing up in unconscionable circumstances #because their parents have decided who they are based on various external quirks like stars and colors #rather than the kid showing who they are through their heart. #so it’s all in good fun except when it isn’t. #but once again going back to the all in good fun part #it really is so sensible to say girl sun boy moon. #you can feel this #you get me!!! #it explains so much

[narwhalandchill]

oh my fucking god i feel. SO stupid rn at How i didnt make the (super sane very normal just absolutely. Yes. Surely) connection earlier but uhh

so anyway im now like 89% certain that whatever the "traces" of the narwhal that remain on ajax and facilitate their (ever-growing) innate connection are like. an actually fundamental aspect of it (them?) more or less.

why? because if you consider its pov just for a moment. the narwhal was literally about to depart teyvat for good. it had nearly finished consuming the primordial sea and preparing to breach surface to finish the job by eating the french for the leftovers their human bodies were made from. its an interstellar voyager it does not linger on planets it devours. it goes glug glug and it leaves.

and like if it wasnt for traveler intervening its confirmed through narzissenkreuz and renes world formula that teyvat wouldve just been destroyed. no one could have stopped the narwhal not neuvillette not focalors not anyone.

so what was the one other thing it did right before going for that french brunch? calling for ajax. getting them reunited in the primordial sea. like all the possible implications aside bc theres many different ways to speculate on the exact reasons why and the nature of that link. the point remains.

it wasnt leaving teyvat without finding him.

like the narwhal is about to fucking Dip from this cringe planet and whatever part of it that ajax carries within himself his narwhal Absolutely wanted to be reunited with. what the fuck am i supposed to read from that. hoyo???????!??! answers?!?!?!

and its not only the calling from the narwhal side itself either bc this is ALL coinciding with the growth of a 'restless power' within ajax and his vision malfunctioning (the things celestia is literally confirmed to harvest energy thru to repair its damaged authority) and his connection with the narwhal reaching an actual conscious level (arguably subconscious n emotional too bc i find it Curious his mood is poor right as the narwhal is repeatedly described as positively malding to the point its boss fight mechanic is literally a rage meter). ajax' power is growing. his destiny is starting to shift and something is drawing him to fontaine... right as the narwhal is getting close to finished with the primordial sea. funny how it overlaps eh. how it aligns 🤨🤨 why are they orbiting each other like this (they should kiss)

(& not to even Mention how ajax just Happened to get that absolutely exponential and borderline unbelievable feat of power spike in extending his foul legacy endurance as massively as he did. while. within the primordial sea. with his narwhal. who had at that point all but incorporated the power of that sea into itself. i s2g if childe was getting passive home turf co-op bonus exp with a 4x multiplier automatically the whole 40+ days 💀💀)

#man the way its lovely reunion but tjen ajax fucking ATTACKS IT ON SIGHT you couldve gotten married!!!!11!1 fucking unbearable i am in agony #anyway contrary to popular belief we still have no fucking clue whether ajax' link to the narwhal was innate #skirk saying the traces remain on him after meeting it isnt saying tht much. the parts he shares w it couldve well been innate but dormant #instead. also just the fact that he woke it up already shady #then like. monoceros caeli being his from the beginning is completely plausible despite ppl acting like its been confirmed his const change #and like them being halves of the same entity on some lvl would make the narwhal being so weak without him n until ajax found it again #make very much. sense. anyway ajax toxicity jokes aside if the narwhal was just trying to eat him point blank without even a hello #i do get why hed react aggressively. but also bros been telling everyone n their mom hes fighting his narwhal the seconf he finds it again😔 #so i feel somewhat confident in assuming he started that 40+ days brawl #anyway if ajax Isnt the celestial narwhal on some level or possibly becoming it as their link grows. #riddle me this atheists. why is his 3rd phase boss theme. the song about His individual murderous rage at us #bc he thought he was outplayed by us. His personal wrath #whys the song for that called the wrath of the celestial narwhal. of the star swallowing whale. Hmmmge. his individual rage. #why does tusk of monoceros caeli speak of him embracing the narwhals innate qualities as embracing mere parts of Himself #funny how tjat goes!! (the OST n boss drop is not 100% serious theory but it does drive me insane. bc why would they phrase it like that) #anyway either theyre 2 halves same original entity or theyre soulmates idgaf . they should fold teyvat in half and eat it for brunch #aaand im going to be consumed by this realization for the next month wish me luck #WHY DID IT NEED HIM THERE SO BADLY???? HUH?????? #i mean relatable dont we all. but its sooooooooo inch resting. Curious indeed #rambles #genshin #childe #childeposting #narwhalposting

[adoredmarigold]

And I think that's what a father is - a blade that never stops cutting

#my art #twdg #twdgs3 #gabe garcia #david garcia #the walking dead game #a new frontier #Gabe makes me so sad... #growing up and starting to see your parents as people and sometimes even realizing that they're not good is the most devastating part #of growing up

[uncanny-tranny]

It's actually kind of heartbreaking how many people feel their life has ended right after high school or college, and honestly, the heavy romanticization of that period of time is so overwhelmingly predominant that it can be hard to avoid. It's insidious to constantly be told that ages 10-24 are the only worthwhile parts of life, that everything after is essentially meaningless and dull.

It's hard not to look around you and think that your life still is open and full of potential when you're told over and over again that the rose-tinted childhood is the last time you were alive. It's hard to realize that your life isn't over when you walk off the stage of your graduation.

We must realize that we will always be full of potentials. Your life won't be over until you take your final breath, and then? That's simply another chapter in your story, one of many. Let yourself realize that you're alive in the here and now. There will be good and bad, but never a complete loss of potential or hope.

#positivity #it's just... weird when you see somebody your age who says how over their life feels you know? #and i feel for them. i feel their pain and the emptiness of not knowing what's next or what you should do #and that's sometimes the scary part of life. but your story isn't over yet #one day it will be. one day you'll put the pen down and dry the ink on the yellowed pages and close your book of life. but that's not today #you are allowed to be an aimless spirit. you are allowed to breathe in without the crushing weight of productivity #the idea that your only potential happens when you're too young to realize it is wrong #your potential has nothing to do with feeling your youth and how little you know #it is hard to really internalize this and remind yourself to make space for hope and positivity... #...and you might not be ready to internalize this. that's okay. i'll wait with you (in a strictly spiritual sense) #we can wait together and not think about any of it. just to rest and collect our minds and feel the world hold its breath with us #all this to say that your life isn't over yet. you don't have to beat yourself up over not having lived at fucking 18 #allow yourself the compassion to realize that you needed time to grow and mature and explore the world in your own way

[scoopstomyahoy]

thinking about a no upside down au steddie fic where steve and eddie run into each other years after moving away from hawkins, and eddie remembers steve and his fall from grace as king, and is kind of intrigued to see what kind of person he is now

and steve doesn’t remember him at all at first, because, look, eddie changed his hair again, and steve’s had a few head injuries (no upside down but i imagine he still went thru some shit with the party and with robin), and he didn’t really think about eddie in high school anyway, and he’s trying to forget about hawkins as much as possible (besides the kiddos, but they’re all moved out for college now, anyway) (obviously he lives with robin)

but steve is different now, happier, more open, flirts with guys, flirts with EDDIE, and eddie….. well, he wants to know more! and he tells steve he knows him from hawkins, and steve’s sunny little smile flickers a little, but he just apologizes for not remembering him and mentions he has some memory problems

and they get to know each other, and eventually as eddie tells him more (and maybe with the help of some yearbooks) steve remembers eddie. and. well. they like getting to know each other. and they like each other. and then they get together

eventually they’ve been together for a while, and eddie thinks he wants to maybe introduce steve to wayne, and he mentions he’s going to go back to hawkins for a long weekend (as he’s done a couple times) and this time he’d like steve to join him

and again steve’s sunny smile flickers a bit, but he says he’d love to meet eddie’s uncle, and… they go to hawkins. and it goes well— meeting wayne, at least, but steve seems a little on edge the whole time they’re there, tense when they drive in, fidgety when they go to the grocery store, et cetera. eddie thinks maybe steve is nervous about staying with the man who raised eddie, which is ridiculous, because wayne LOVES steve.

it’s not til they leave the town altogether that steve relaxes, and eddie realizes it wasn’t “meeting the parents” but rather going back to hawkins. and speaking of meeting the parents, steve didn’t ever bring his own up, even though eddie knew they still lived in hawkins. and the way steve glanced around whenever they went in public, like he was scared of getting recognized

and he asks about it, and steve doesn’t really want to talk about it, but he gives eddie snippets of it. people he wanted to leave behind in hawkins, memories that resurfaced, things he wants to forget

eddie goes back to see wayne sometimes, and the first time he doesn’t know whether to ask steve to come, so he just mentions he’s thinking about going to hawkins for some weekend and steve immediately starts making plans with him as if the invite is implicit. they go back to hawkins several more times, steve still tense and pent up the whole time they’re there

over time steve reveals more and more to eddie. everything that made hawkins hell for him, from the things he himself did in high school to the things people did to him. stuff tommy and carol and billy said to him. some of it is just typical high school bullshit (and oh, the nancy thing.) some of it is the tragedies steve went through, the horrors he had to protect his kids from. the injuries he sustained. more generally the homophobia that permeated the whole town, keeping steve from being himself. the lack of support in the indiana public school system for a high school senior who’s had two concussions and gone through incredible trauma.

his parents. the reason why steve’s mail is addressed to ‘steve buckley’ now, not ‘steve harrington’.

(that doesn’t come out until much, much later, and eddie is kicking himself for ever suggesting steve come back to hawkins.)

eddie, who hardly had an easy time of it in hawkins, is absolutely blown away by what steve had gone through in the same town, right under his nose. the entire persona that steve was trying to leave behind — the cool as a cucumber, unaffected, douchey mask he wore to hide all that he had endured. the head injuries. the emotional tragedies he had gone through. the way he had to be the rock for the kids even as he went through the same things as them.

he tries to tell steve they never have to go back to hawkins again, and steve is having none of it. he tells steve wayne can come visit them in their new city, and steve thinks that’s completely unfair to the man who had raised eddie, seriously, you’re going to make him come all the way up here?

and well i don’t know exactly what the ending is but steve is so stubborn about trying to love hawkins because it was eddie’s home and he wants to be able to go see wayne because wayne deserves to see his kid and eddie deserves to see his uncle and steve doesn’t want to be the problem :(

#steddie #stranger things #this isn’t very fleshed out but just. hawkins as an incredibly scarring place for steve #something built up in his mind as a very dangerous place for him not just because of what happened there but who he had to be there #i think ultimately it would culminate in them going back to hawkins and running into steve’s parents when they least expect it #and steve gets to yell at them in public and tell them they suck and ruin their image and eddie is being his little guard dog next to him #baring his teeth #for the no upside down part of the au i think it would have to be like. nebulous tragedy of season 1 struck them #barb still died (sorry barb) so that his relationship with nancy falls apart. will and el are twins and they disappear the same night #steve knows the kids earlier in the timeline in this one and has already basically adopted them when will and el go missing #eddie was never the victim of a massive witch hunt but jason still harasses him during his third senior year and gets ppl to gang up on him #so he was never like Wanted by all of hawkins and can never return but he sure doesn’t feel welcome there besides w wayne #oh i also think it would be important that one of the trips steve snaps at eddie bc he’s so strung out and immediately regrets it #and takes it as proof that when in hawkins Steve Is A Bad Person and tries to explain this to eddie #eddie meanwhile is trying to convince steve that he’s not a bad person and that he was being mean because he’s completely stressed out #and he wouldn’t be so stressed out if he didn’t make himself come back to hawkins #anyway ultimately. steve realized hawkins is just a place where bad things happened. it is not a place that makes people (including himself) #bad. it’s just. a place. and steve did not grow and change for the better bc he got out of hawkins. he got better bc he put the effort in #god i just. love steve so much and the version of him in my mind is so much better developed than what the duffers are doing

[bookshelfdreams]

.

#just saw that tweet abt pink days on the set of the barbie movie & i think it made me realize why it - the marketing etc - annoys me so #'margot robbie went around collecting fines and donated them to charity haha' okay. look. #that's just the perfect metaphor for how it worked for us - me - anyone who wants to align themselves with me - when we were girls #isn't it #because you grow up and you desperately want to fit in with the other girls but you don't & you don't know why #but you're surrounded by things and people telling you what a normal girl is like & little-to-none of it is things you find appealing or #interesting. makeup and fashion and skin care. gymnastics and romance. you're told that you are obligated to be pretty #but prettiness has never been part of your perception of yourself. femininity is an arcane concept #an exclusive club that will never grant you entrance #& the only comfort you can give yourself is deciding that it's dumb anyway. shallow. vain. who cares about looks and boys and all of that #idiots that's who #but this is Doing It Wrong too isn't it? because now everyone who has taught you that you will forever fail at femininity turns around #& tells you that's patriarchal oppression and YOU'RE the bad one by distancing yourself from something that always made you feel defective #'YOU may have never lived up to this impossible standard of perfection but some ppl do and actually it's fine to be like that! #hyperfeminine traditionally beautiful women are the most oppressed group of all & finally we will stand up for our rights!' #'girls can be pretty AND conpetent' but that's not what they're actually saying. isn't it. #because performing femininity correctly is the prerequisite. a threshold you can never cross and you know that. & that's fine #but somehow that's wrong too because you're not supposed to make peace w that are you. you're SUPPOSED to want to do it right #even if you don't and never have and never will #and once again everyone is yelling at you that this club isn't meant for you. if you criticize the barbie movie you're antifeminist #if you refuse to wear pink I'll make you pay a fine #hashtag girlpower #(well im not a girl. not a guy either. and not a secret third thing. just bad at femininity. #bad at being a person. and y'all don't need to tell me you don't want me in your club #I've always known that. i just wish you'd stop expecting me to beg for entrance.)

[eggy-tea]

For a movie featuring basically zero explicitly queer characters, Across the Spider-Verse was pretty fucking queer.

#see: trans (allegory?) gwen stacy #see: coming out to your parents and not knowing if they’ll still love you afterwards #having a major part of your identity be something you need to hide #thinking you’re a lone freak and then finding out that there are actually SO MANY other people like you #and then realizing that just because you’re part of the same community it doesn’t mean you automatically see eye-to-eye on everything #coming out to your parents and they’re not ready for it and they don’t react the way you’d hope #community elders taking you in because they’ve been there #community elders channeling their trauma into trying to keep the kids safe #community elders perpetuating trauma because they can’t not when trauma responses are what’s kept them alive #and like. a bunch of this is common to a lot of different marginalized communities #and a bunch more is common to growing up and becoming your own person #which is why it’s been at the center of a lot of superhero stuff since superhero stuff has been a thing #and why superhero stuff can resonate with a wide variety of people from different backgrounds #but also: Choices Were Made #spider man: across the spider verse spoilers #spiderman atsv spoilers #<- very mild and in the tags but still. better safe etc. #anyway a+ movie can’t wait to watch it again

[mattodore]

being able to trace behaviors and traits back to something as simple as matthias never having toys as a baby makes him feel so real to me...

#river dipping #matthias evanoff #echthroi #oc extras #guy who doesn’t watch movies or have any fun hobbies and just plays with ppl instead #so crazy love u matthias <3 #it's kind of crazy how i can open a google doc with no idea how to get where i need to in relation to an ask abt an oc #like point a to point b is unchartable #and then i just start typing and coming to realizations and putting pieces together that i'd never considered the full scope of #but that just. god. that just make SO much sense #not only like character-wise but like. this is how this would actually happen. #like all of these factors WOULD actually play a part in the way a child would grow and the outcome COULD be just like this #i'm a genius actually................. #dfjnkvkhnjfdgh #it's interesting to think abt how matthias had no toys but he did grow up in an incredibly ostentatious manor #so while he didn't have that to help him develop his social and emotional skills #he did have the contrasting colors and patterns to help develop and continue to stimulate his brain as he grew #hm................ no but i really am a genius btw. like for coming up with mattodore. why be humble abt it #everything just makes sense everything ties back to something #like i'll go back and i'll read their questionnaires and it's just like. YEAH... #even when i haven't filled in some blips like esp. irt theo's past... i think it takes very little examination to come #to those realizations yourself... like. obviously bc i've had an anon ask abt something they were picking up abt theo that was like!!! #yeah you're right!! i mean a little off in places but that's understandable. like you still GET IT! you SEE IT! which is crazy #like... lays down. mattodore feel real. they make sense. it just makes me smile.......... :) #loving my ocs today so baddddd #but anyway enough oc plague having it’s nene time ! #and then i’ll get to my activity though i can’t lie i am gnawing my phone atm bc Interaction….. you understand #the personality disorder <3 #my best friend mwah ten years strong babe

[hydrasaura]

now that i think abt it, looking back, srmthfg did a lot of stuff that i liked so much, let’s say regarding the main character. I find Chiro’s case so interesting because despite the fact that he is never given any backstory whatsoever, he becomes meaningful through his actions and becomes established and distinguished through his interactions with others. I think he is such a likeable character but not in the way that he’s perfect, he has his flaws and fears that he overcomes or struggles with. He is shown multiple times being kind towards others, even towards hideous creatures or animals (i mean it would be ironic for him to hate animals given that he lives with monkeys) which at the time was like such a breath of fresh air for me. Also the way characters constantly belittle/make fun of him for hanging out with animals and he just pretty much tells all of them to f off which is great. The majority of times the villains aren’t even naturally evil but corrupted by the evil force and the main characters recognize that and try to help as much as they can. Another thing that i like abt Chiro is that he’s supposed to be ‘’the chosen one’’ but he isn’t overpowered, he has several established moves which he uses throughout the show or improves and that’s it. and he loses, A LOT. Like there’s this great accent placed on the fact that they are a team and on how they are constantly saving each other.

AND GOD let me tell you, i dislike mechs, among all animals primates and monkeys are my least favorite and yet this show has somehow managed to make me love BOTH. The way they made me care so deeply abt each freaking technicolor monkey, about this pink mary-sue-ish robot-girl, and about that plain-ass looking super robot is INSANE. The writer somehow managed to give them so much personality. When Antauri [redacted] I was literally not okay for several weeks. I related to Gibson so much and his beef with Sprx was so fun and his relationship with Otto so nice. Nova was badass and funny and i loved the big sister kind of relationship she had with Chiro. I can’t even chose a fave out of the monkeys because they complemented each other so well. Jinmay seemed sorta boring at first but the fact that she was a robot made everything so much more interesting, i absolutely loved all the times when they would pit her against the heroes. I also loved that she was established from the beginning and kept being a recurring character even becoming a member of the team but not in the way that it would break the team’s mojo. The super-robot was so plain but the way they constantly showed us it was sentient was so eerie. AND god the villains where compelling, terrifying and idk felt like a constant looming threat. Idk maybe it’s nostalgia speaking but this show had so much shit that somehow newer shows/anime constantly miss and it makes me sad when i remember how it ended and how it has been literally forgotten by everyone. Sometimes i think it’s a fever dream because nobody ever mentions it, not even when they are talking abt ‘‘forgotten shows’‘ :’)))

#the way demon slayer has a superb animation but doesn't hold a candle to this show in terms of character development for example #I realize that maybe srmthfg is the reason why i sorta like anime where #it begins like black lagoon #you are given a character that becomes your eyes in discovering ''the team'' #and despite very little back story being told abt each character you grow to love them because of their personality #and the way they interact with eachother #it's like you become part of the story somehow #srmthfg #long post #rant #also i just remembered how when i watched voltron i kept thinking #this is so boring i've seen it before in srmthfg #but srmthfg took a lot of inspiration from the og voltron #and yet it has still managed to make a story that i liked more than the voltron reboot #like this is the thing i love abt this show so much #they took inspiration from star wars voltron other important anime #mashed everything up and made something great and unique #no over the top obnoxious references like how now each freaking show needs to have an obligatory evangelion reference #it was a pure love-letter to all those great franchises and IT SHOWS

[sabatoforever]

I'm grieving the disappearance of Gu Mang wolfpup self. I'm after the Time Mirror part and Gu Mang returned with some of his memories. I miss Gu Mang. I miss his pov that I'll never get anymore (probably if no one take his memories again). He was a different person that only got to live like three years with baggage and sins and grievances from a life he didn't remember and even understand for that matter. He only got some months to live with like two people who treated him kind of well. The moment he was told what he did, even if he doesn't remember it, he ask for forgiveness and the chance to repent. He kneels in front of every tomb. He want to do good even for day.

I like the "original" Gu Mang but I got attached to the him with no memories.

#I'm reading Remnants of Filth #but stopped after the time mirror arc and I couldn't understand why #then I realized I wouldn't see the Gu Mang I've liked and loved anymore #my baby #like with Mo Ran all the version of him are all part of his growing up #version 0.5 then back to 1.0 teenager him and 2.0 young adult him #Wolfpup Gu Mang was a completely differnt person #and he basically died? #yuwu #remnants of filth #gu mang #yuwu gu mang

[daz4i]

how and why is there discourse about whether or not certain queer identities exist/if people should be allowed(???) to use them. why is "people know their own identity better than you ever could, and they're the only one who get a say on what they are" such a tough concept to grasp

i think if you find yourself offended by the label someone uses (especially if they're a stranger) or think it invalidates your own, it's a good idea to look inside yourself and question why that may be. more often than not, it's a result of insecurity or uncertainty of your own identity (or many other things, but i won't make a whole list here). whatever reason it is, until you resolve it, you shouldn't take it out on people for having an identity you don't understand

many have said it before but it's worth saying over and over. infighting only helps our oppressors. conservatives don't care if you're a cis gay or a xenogender aegosexual aplatonic lesbian, they hate all of us either way. trying to fit in by going for people who are easier targets for them isn't gonna help you, it'll just alienate you from your own community, and you're never gonna please them. the momentary rush you get from hearing you're not like "one of /those/ gay people" is not worth it and is gonna do more harm in the long run, i assure you

also, it is important to me to say this, but having some less than nice kneejerk reaction caused by confusion about an identity you don't understand doesn't mean you're a bad person or anything. as long as you aren't mean to that person, and you take a second to think smth along the lines of "wait a minute, this isn't any of my business" after having said reaction, you're good 👍 a lot of reflexive reactions we have to things are ingrained into us simply by. well. living in a society 🤡 and you're not terrible for having those thoughts. it's your actions that matter, and your second thought (the "wait, why did i just think that?") is more defining of your actual character and morals than your reflex. i know that having thoughts like this, even tho they're unwanted, can very easily make one spiral, so it's important to me that whoever needs to hear this knows this doesn't make you a bad person 🙏 you're good, keep taking actions to be good, accept other people even if you don't understand them, and you're on the right track :)

#i considered adding that last part in the tags but i figured it'll be too long for that 😭 #i noticed i'm posting a lot of rants lately. sorry. but i do wanna make sure no one's actually feeling bad over them #if i complain about something that you do or call it mean and such. that doesn't make you a bad person #you can always work to change and grow 👍 it's not easy but it starts with smaller steps than you'd expect #and now i just switched to a whole other topic from my original point. oops #i do firmly believe that any discourse about someone's identity is dumb as fuck #seeing it in poll blogs always makes me 😐😬 like how is it any business for any of us. why is this up for debate #if a person says they're queer then they are. they don't need to pass some test or go through initiation to be accepted #if they feel comfortable with a certain word that's awesome. why does it matter to *you* which word they use #'they're only using this microlabel to feel special' so? is there anything wrong with that? #'this label contradicts [insert other identity that falls under the same umbrella]' ok. but does that hurt anyone in any way #a lot of identities can even be self contradictory. does it matter tho? does it affect anyone in any way? #'they might realize that label is wrong later' again. what's the harm in that. #i don't blame anyone for these thoughts bc like. this is how cishets view a lot of the even more common labels #so you're basically taught to think this way from day one. that doesn't mean you need to stick to that thought process #you might have these reflexes forever no matter how hard you try. but you'll get quicker about moving on from them #but you do have to try. you do have to realize that other people's identities aren't about you #anyway. this post feels like batting at a hornets nest. really hope i don't get some bad faith readers here lol #(i noticed a lot of places one could apply bad faith but like it's 3:30 am i'm too tired to add this many disclaimer. #so i'm gonna trust you to not jump to conclusions and to approach this in good faith okay? mwah 🖤) #also my whole ramble abt morality (in the tags too) is relevant to. any topic really #i may just make a separate post about it really. .....tomorrow tho.

[yourqueenb]

Feeling another random burst of self confidence (probably due to lack of sleep honestly) so have a heavily made-up eye reveal I guess? 😂

#this is from my bridal makeup trial back in December #and tbh even though it’s not exactly what I wanted I still really liked it and the overall look looked good in my engagement photos #we’re gonna change a few things for the day of but yeah #no one asked but I actually like my eye shape for the most part #I feel like they can look kind of sleepy or a bit too small sometimes in photos where I’m not wearing as much makeup #or any at all #but I still like them especially since they look like that less often now #maybe it’s bc I’ve kind of grown out of that and I haven’t really noticed until recently #or maybe it’s just bc I’m getting a little better at taking photos lol #either way if you’re a teenage girl or a woman in her early 20s and you have these random but prominent insecurities like me #I just wanna say that you’ll get past them/grow into them #maybe it’s just those awkward teen years or maybe you’re not completely comfortable with how you look or taking pictures yet #but it’s okay you’re beautiful in your own way #and it’s okay to have insecurities too #everyone has them whether you realize it or not #I def still have other things I’m insecure about #but it’s important to talk and think nicely about yourself even when it’s hard #so that’s what I’m doing here #I’m gonna try to keep practicing that from now on #hopefully I can keep it up bc I really do think too negatively about myself sometimes

[hybrix-hidings]

Tpp Season 4 spoilers

Okay but also when you consider that Rita is older than Juno by probably an absolute minimum of five years (and let's be real, it's probably closer to ten) so much of the shit she did to stick around and help him out makes that much more sense. Sure, the difference in maturity between 38-43/48 may not be so huge, but remember, they met when Juno was about 19. Whether she was 24 or 29, she would have still seen Juno as a kid.

And when someone you perceive as a kid goes through so many lengths to help you keep your own job and save your name while his own gets dragged through the mud? When everything they do in efforts to help make something better only smacks them into the dirt?? Of course you're going to want to help! Of course she stayed, that's her Dumb Baby Sibling who did something really rash and stupid and brave.

And once you see someone that way, your viewpoint never really changes. I'm sure 20 years of working together changed it a bit to where he's not really a kid anymore, but he also is in her heart. This is up until he can do some proper growing up in s2, where his new maturity and will to live put them on slightly more equal ground.

Idk. I just have feelings about Rita and Juno and their whole relationship I love them so much

#the penumbra podcast #tpp #juno steel #rita #look whenever she starts sobbing about him growing up shes not just being extra thats a v real reaction #i Also start sobbing whenever i start thinking abt how much hes grown #i also also start sobbing when i think about them because theyre BEST FRIENDS and i LOVE THEM #idk the best part is that Juno just. probably doesnt realize that she sees him this way #because to him HE was always HER boss #and he didnt even know she was older than him until they left the HCPD i think #so she really didnt have any mental authority over him?? not that juno has ever really cared about the older = authority thing #or authority in general #idk. i like em #i like them so much i have Feelings abt it

[townslore]

discovery of the day

#im sorry i do Not see what everyone sees in this movie. although from the years of browsing the internet ive began to realize #that i actually dont know if people actually like the movie or not #why is everything so rushed #their romance felt like nothing to me because i dont KNOW what they see in eachother #listen you dont have to tell me straight up into the camera why they love eachother #but the aggressive kissing and cut sex scenes arent telling me much #i get that it came out in 2005 but cutting mostly every gay sex scene? even the kissing for the most part? #but oh we NEED to see this happy husband and wife doing it. yes im bitter #a german movie by the name of summer storm came out the year before this one and actually shows something that feels like actual passion #i sound like i need to see people doing it in these movies all the time I promise thats not it #but even the kissing? the thing i Actually like the most? the thing that makes me feel things? felt like nothing at all #and oh i forgot that this is a tragic gay movie where one of them dies. Oh yeah. forgot. #mentioning summer storm again: it actually has a relatively happy ending. feels good that i dont need to be reminded of how gay people are #doomed 24/7. #the romance started good. with jack telling the guy whos name i already forgot to get his ass in the tent already. #the Pulling his arm over my body thing. it was going great #THEN IT WENT SO FAST! WHY WAS HE SUDDENLY SO INTO IT! WHY WERE THEY BOTH SUDDENLY DOING IT #im sorry i expected a slighter slow burn than this!!! calm down cowboys i have no idea why you two like eachother all of the sudden! #i seriously thought they would show these little moments of tension #and it just growing bigger and bigger #until they couldnt take it anymore #that would explain the aggressiveness of it! why they were so desperate! but it literally just HAPPENED!!!!!!!!! #im sorry i. I expected more of this movie that i hear so much about. #the most it made me feel was at that moment that turned into a meme where i thought “Hop on fortnite” #chuckled. that was it. did i cry? did my heart race at any moment? was i worried about what was gonna happen? not Once #im so. Disappointed. #after this i wanted to watch summer storm but netflix removed it. Its a german only movie no one knows from 2004. where the hell am i gonna #🏴‍☠️ that #AAAGHHHH!!!!!!! #not being able to watch summer storm made me cry more than this movie did What the hell