#SHE CALLED HIM A SIMP

[possiblyawesometmblr]

thinking a lot about how you're supposed to burn the best part of your meal to get the gods' attention. thinking a lot about how sally burned the remains of a milkshake someone else drank and poseidon still showed up immediately anyway.

#i know for a fact this man waits by the phone hoping sally will call him #sally jackson really has a god simping for her #and she SHOULD #sally jackson #poseidon #percy jackson #pjo #pjo spoilers

[dootznbootz]

I think people sleep on this moment in the Odyssey...

If I'm wrong, not getting full context, or see something that isn't there, feel free to give evidence to explain why.

Here he crept under a pair of bushes, one an olive, the other a wild olive, which grew from the same stem with their branches so closely intertwined that when the winds blew moist not a breath could get inside, nor could the rain soak right through to the earth.

(Book 5, Rieu)

I think this is about Penelope and him.

Obviously, their marriage bed is made from an Olive tree. If it's just about Athena then why are there two mentioned? Why did Homer mention two when he could've just said he took refuge under one? Or a completely different type of tree? Why mention them being intertwined?

One an olive: Penelope, who has been with society and "safe" in Ithaca ("Safe" because of the suitors)

One wild: Odysseus, who has dealt with literal monsters and immortals and has just escaped from Calypso. Literally naked and filthy, a "wild man".

"which grew from the same stem with their branches": Them both being together at first, before being separated.

"so closely intertwined that when the winds blew moist not a breath could get inside, nor could the rain soak right through to the earth.": Despite being separated, they are still "intertwined". Whether you want to think of it as them being likeminded or simply connected, even though they are apart, nothing could get in between them. 🥺

I don't know what else Homer could be referring to other than them.

#It's funny to me as even though she's not always mentioned when he retells his tale to the Phaeacians. The narrator mentions her CONSTANTLY #Because even if Odysseus doesn't say it. He's thinking about her often #honestly I...I don't think it COULD be anything else but I'm sure people will be mad that the simp loves his wife. 🤷 #This part is the reason why I mention them calling the bed their “nest” as that's what THIS part calls it too. and I find it really cute #It was a nest where he SHOULD have stayed in with his family but no... :'D #half-empty nest😞 #also it could be him comforting himself??? He's been forced to be in beds he doesn't want to be in for YEARS #Now. he's free and while it's not “fancy”. but at least it's SOMEWHAT like his own #greek mythology #tagamemnon #odyssey #the odyssey #penelope #odysseus #odypen #odysseus and penelope #odysseus x penelope #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #essay

[onlinecasualty]

in the most normal way possible i wanna hold noras raw brain in my hands and just stare at it

#i have so many questions #shes as real to me as neil is to andrew when andrew calls him a hallucination #this woman has changed my brain chemistry and left me reeling #AND THEN SHE COMES BACK FROM THE DEAD AND PUBLISHES ANOTHER BOOK 10 YEARS LATER #YOU SEE WHY IM SPIRALING RIGHT #anyway im totally fine but uhh heyyy nora it u ever wanna lend me ur brain for a lil bit #simp emoji #nora sakavic #the sunshine court #all for the game #neil josten #jean moreau #andrew minyard #jeremy knox #kevin day #aftg #tsc

[pick-a-lane]

I was sitting with my friends today, and one of them turned to me and asked “name any man ever” because I was being questioned on wether or not I knew any big popculture actors/influencers, and unfortunately the first person who came to mind (that I said outloud) was John Soap Mactavish

…never trust your friends with anything.

#call of duty #cod #john soap mactavish #she looked at me confused and then searched him up #i was in fear the entire time #my reputation as being the cool funny friend is ruined #she thinks I am a simp now its scary #(i just think hes cool okay)

[derpiedoxie]

A very sunny boi!

He’s happy to see you!

#I have once again drawn something really fucking self indulgent #I showed Lee this and she immediately called me a simp #I mean fair #but HEY #also I realised that I have never posted a full drawing of sunny here so I had to remedy that #cries cause I wanna be held by him #fnaf #fnaf security breach #fnaf sun #fnaf sb #five nights at freddy's #sundrop #five nights at freddy's security breach #fnaf daycare attendant #fanart #digital art

[menelaiad]

ik you've talked about it before but tumblr blog search on mobile sucks ass so if it's not too much of a bother could you redirect me to your posts on why you dislike emily wilson?

i've never made a post on it. but, here you go:

as a translator? i have no issues with her. her translations are pretty good. so her 'work' i don't have a problem with. don't get me wrong, sometimes i think she toes that dangerous line of 'women good. men bad. feminism.' black and white line very finely. it's a lot more subtle than most modern classicsts but yKNOW.

my issue comes from her introduction to the odyssey. so it's her introduction. her own thoughts. not a translation of something. or outside influence. HER introduction. she says:

The second is piled high with newly acquired treasure, brought by blustering, self-pitying Menelaus. As Menelaus pompously declares ... we meet the beautiful and frighteningly intelligent Helen back home in Sparta, with her wealthy, blustering, and rather less intelligent husband, Menelaus. ...and the rich, narcissistic, uxorious Menelaus.

she then, in book 4, translates the original text in which menelaus is NONE of these things. the only thing he's guilty of really, is the rich thing. cause telemachus is all like 'damn bro ur loaded'. but menelaus is not arrogant about it. he's not smug. he's not narcissistic. he literally says like 2 lines later that he would give away most of his wealth if it meant those who died at troy could come home.

'self-pitying' WHERE?! he cries because he feels GUILTY. the tears are not for him. they are the for the men who died at troy. i'm not getting quotes because it's literally in book fucking 4. he is NOT feeling sorry for himself he is MAD at himself for troy. the only thing i can THINK where he even links his tears to himself is because he says something like, 'every time i think of them i cry because i miss them all' or smth like that. he's not crying for HIM.

'rather less intelligent husband' - you know my feelings on this. menelaus is not stupid. helen is just very smart. and THATS FINE. i love helen being the brains, i'm not against a smart woman and her husband not being as smart. but like. because he doesnt recognise telemachus straight away? or the bird omen? he's stupid? really. we're gonna measure his WHOLE intelligence on that?

'uxorious'. menelaus loves his wife and that's pathetic and funny apparently? tell me. does she describe odysseus this way? hektor in the new iliad translation? i dont think so. 'excessive love their wife' that's what uxorious means. oh im sorry. forgiving ur wife and building a relationship with her and trying to move on together and being nice to her .... that excessive now??? thats??? bad???????

she literally takes menelaus' shining moments in the odyssey. him feeling guilty and remorseful. him showing how haunted he is by the war. him caring and loving helen despite everything. the fact that he is a compassionate. kind. loving man (in comparison to most homeric men) ----- and uses them to insult him. and it just GENUINLEY baffles me. because she wrote that introduction. and then four books later is ENTIRELY proven wrong? im so-----

dont get me wrong. some of this is just very pettty 'you're wrong about menelaus' anger. but some of it is BAFFLEMENT at the fact that she has this in her introduction, those are HER thoughts. and then when you actually get to the text of the odyssey from homer. she is wrong. cause she can't change those greek words too much. translation is a tricky mistress, sure. but she cant go and say 'then menelaus didnt care for those men' because that's just outright WRONG. she has to translate, as faithfully as she can, whats there. and whats there is NOT what she claimed in the introduction.

#negative // #long post // #i used this as an argument in my thesis #i feel like the 'less intellgient husband' quip is that like. men bad women amazing thing she does sometimes #when it can be. 'woman is amazing and smart. and man is not as intelligent but not a complete fucking loser' #is menelaus perfect? nooooo and i would never claim him to be #but dont use his actual positive attributes as INSULTS?! use the actual things wrong with him SDFGHJK #literally calls him a 'rich simp' and for that he's the worst man in the odyssy ever

[solargeist]

AU where all the burs live in an apartment building together instead of a house

#they r NEIGHBORS…. #pog is caught every time she tries to visit lman . leave her ALONEEEE let her see her boy #arg doesn’t answer the door ever u have to call him . he changed his number again #simp usually has takeout sitting by his door or trash #ghost and rev have taken up gardening their balcony is so nice #100p is in the wifi he’s everywhere

[lokislytherin]

streamer daniel au?

ok so i’m a vtuber watcher right. i Get the parasocial thing. lemme get to it im just gonna make this in bullet points

1) daniel is a streamer: he’s wannabe pro gamer! went from “i’m gonna game and beat up enemies as stress relief bc i get bullied irl” as a middle schooler to a high schooler being like “actually i can make some good money out of this” bc he got a growth spurt and went from og daniel to current daniel, his real name is park hyungseok (they all use their korean names) but he streams under the name ‘daniel’ and wears a mask to prevent being completely doxxed. it was beomjae’s idea bc you can’t tell me he’s also a gamer (he and daniel are a lot closer in this bc 1) jay does not go to the same skl 2) vasco and jinsung are not gamers and they both want Gamer Bros yk and daniel is hilarious when he malds he daipans and everything and beomjae has the time of his life watching daniel scream at npcs)

2) daniel uses pet names a lot: he calls people baby, sweetheart, honey, jagiya bc he’s a pretty boy and fansa pays SO WELL. he also does bfe sometimes so imagine he’s like vox akuma from nijisanji en fourth wave luxiem. hot guy with a smooth, comforting voice calls you baby. i’d be dead in seconds. people like lala kim eat that shit up

3) you know who also eats that up? hong jaeyeol. bc he’s gay and daniel is like The hot guy who coincidentally plays the same video games as jaeyeol (who games bc he’s a hikikomori loser /j), it starts from jaeyeol going “yo jaehye look there’s a guy who plays this game too i’m not the only one” to “o fuck he made me a mod bc i helped him bonk the backseaters” to “he. he just called me baby. excuse me im gonna pass out” (’jace’ is daniel’s other mod. the duality of having nice mod ‘asdf’ (jaeyeol) and mean mod ‘jacepogg’ (beomjae))

4) they graduate from high school and they end up at the same uni (STEM major jay? med jay? law jay? poll needed? + compsci major jace + business major daniel, they’re all in the same free elective (still unknown) with the rest of the j high gang) and hyungseok catches jaeyeol playing the video game (bc he’s bored, he’s just taking this for the credits he alr knows all the content) and he’s like “YO. you’re good” and jaeyeol’s like !!!!! bc those are daniel’s eyes?? is this guy daniel?? daniel his ‘celeb’ crush is sitting next to him??

5) they become friends and at some point jaeyeol casually reveals he’s a yt mod for a gamer and hyungseok like wait. WAIT. and the reveal actually happens bc daniel’s mod ‘asdf’ and hyungseok’s bestie hong jaeyeol text the same way + react the same way to being called pet names

#i sent scarle my first superchat ever bc first month anniversary of her membership (gifted memba thankuuuu) #me: might not be able to make it to ur bday stream tmr but i hope you know that ily scarle wub u MUAH #her (currently with a sore throat and half a voice): awww thank you rina you're so sweet i love you baby muah #me on the verge of passing out: s- supa virginity t-tskr- #when she calls me by name i go 🥺 #she called me honey once and baby today and i was just like. zoning out for the next five minutes recalling the memory #i write jay well bc like him i am also a simp for individuals of the same gender as me (real) #lookism #lookism au #lookism fic #ficling? #janiel #jaeseok #hong jaeyeol #jay hong #daniel park #park hyungseok

[artemislosthunter]

one more person to seriously say that the HSR version of Kallen is in Luocha's coffin and I'm about to enter my villain arc

If it was Kallen (or whatever her HSR equivalent would be) HE'D FLAT OUT SAY IT, bcs idk he's build different and very self reflecting when it comes to the weird / murderous things he does

He tells you it's just someone he's not close to. No. This is very much NOT Kallen, stfu

#this and everyone calling Otto's entire story arc 'simp gone mad' are going to be the reason that one day I'll finally snap skldjslk #'haha simp' bitch he knew Kallen wouldn't love him. He never expected her to do so and fairly never WANTED her to do so #as he did not see himself as a fitting partner for her. He knew of Sakura. She told him in her letters. The reason he wanted to undo her #death so badly is not 'so he could love her / marry her / whatever' it was bcs she was the only friend he ever had #She was the only person that ever CARED about him. Bro grew up abused and uncared for. No this does not make his actions okay #but it EXPLAINS IT #She was the first and only person to care about him. And his desperate actions to save her from being executed #ended up causing her death which drove him over the edge and essentially mad #that's not a 'simp gone mad' or a guy that can't take rejection. This is someone who was convinced he was useless and worthless #who found someone who believed in him. who made his life better by being by his side. and he killed that person. fueling his self hatred #driving him over the edge. making him do terrible things. desperate to undo the worst thing he had done fully aware of everything else he i #doing. #oops character analysis done by accident caused by dumb people

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

alright I have to say it--s3e3 of Miss Scarlet and the Duke was one of my favourite episodes so far. bringing in another character to play off Eliza and fill the position William would usually have in the narrative was really fun, because instead of once again sticking us in the endless cycle of their snark and tension, we actually got to see Eliza learning more about a new person and reacting accordingly. and also, I find Mr. Nash a genuinely fun character to watch, and I love the development of his... slightly-antagonistic-yet-hopeful semi-partnership semi-competition with Eliza?? I'm intrigued by his backstory and motivations now, too, and how they tie into why he's so captivated by Eliza. he sees something of a mirror in her, I think, but at the same time, she pushes him towards growth--both out of competition, to be better than her, and out of motivation, because she expects him to be better than he is and that makes him want to change.

anyway! I expected to be a bit disappointed at the absence of the Duke, but I actually enjoyed this chance for an entirely different dynamic. and I think a lot more character development for everyone can happen with those two separated, too. especially at this specific point in the series. (if I'm being fully honest, part of me wishes there would be more episodes with them separated, so they can have a chance to truly grow on their own. I think that would have a lot more benefit for them as individuals and on their relationship together than constantly being around one another and doing the equivalent of raking their nails across each other's freshly-scabbed-over wounds every. single. day. does)

#gurt says stuff #miss scarlet and the duke #I texted Lu whilst watching this episode and said 'mr. nash likes eliza so much. but not in the normal way. #he wants to study her like a little bug. and he's so loud about it. and I actually love it.' X'D #he does tho!! he's so unashamedly impressed by her!! she's so socially-improper and she messes up his attempts to flirt with random women #and she calls him out on his lying and gives him a hard time for using the cane when he doesn't need it to make people feel bad for him #and his eyes crinkle up around the corners and he's just like 'ah. miss scarlet. I would desperately love to employ you.' #also she bosses him around and he just goes 'ok' and does it #instead of getting into completely pointless and futile arguments about her ego or his need to show leadership or anything else stupid #no she just tells him to do stuff and!! he does it!! #he's not a simp but he's not needlessly absorbed in his own masculinity either #and it's a very good thing to see #anyway. perhaps the little toad mr. nash is growing on me. perhaps I actually really want to see him and eliza work together more.

[milfgyuu]

me: oh jaebeom’s got a gf?

me: *sees girlfriend*

jaebeom: *gets shoved out of the way* WTF?

me: MOVE BITCH. SHE’S MINE.

#yoooooooo my boy has GAME #she’s GORGEOUS #ahgases simping over jaebs gf has to be the most birdie thing ever #she’s so fine #ma’am respectfully i’m cooler than him #call me

[blinday]

Not gonna sue or press charges, but I want to make it clear that Chat Noir is actually MY property, since I invented the boi back in 2009 with his ACTUAL partner Supersonica. His name was actually Simon and his dad was also the supervillain.

#he was a blonde with an asshole for a father and a partner for whom he simped #but she was too business driven to give him a shot even though there was no one she trusted more #he got an arc where he got more powerful but in turn became way more cat like. no not like a furry #he was inspired in nightcrawler. totally different vibe. #he also had a tendency to die for her. like one of his powers is literally that he had 9 lives and 7 of them went through the window #for her yes. ironically her name was Kate at the time (yes the ultimate white girl name but I was like 8 gimme a break) #and it was a pun bc he was the cat but everyone called her Kitty #anyways #give me my credits Astruc. #ml #ml shitpost #miraculous ladybug #11 year old me actually wrote a letter to get my rights over the property but I gave up once I liked the show #like hmm yea they are making good use of him I'll let them keep goin for a while #chat noir #ladybug and chat noir #adrien agreste

[hauntingblue]

I ❤️

IN-BETWEEN ARC EPISODES

#shanks!!!!!! always wonder what is wrong with him to be an emperor..... bc big mom is severely strong and powerful and insane since birth #kaido can't even kill himself so same thing. blackbeard has the end all be all of devil fruits and then shanks is just there. #something smells fishy #they spent all the budget on the musical now we are back with this animation ajdhak #well baby luffy cameo.... always thinking about luffy being a good swimmer.... the anchor t shirt is a foreshadowing ajdhskdjks #yasopp talking about his son.... WELL WHERE IS HE???? #maybe shanks power is being an alcoholic..... who knows.... #luffy calling shanks pathetic is so funny this kid has anger issues.... his powers reveal is so funny ajdkajak to this day.... #i was gonna be pissed about the flashbacks but little luffy is too good #this is my fucked up theory about shanks is that he gives up his arm and his hat when luffy eats the fruit.... idk why yet ill figure it ou #lmao but HOW do you leave a kid with a devil fruit just there.... he must have known who his grandpa is or smth.... like garp muat have wen #after him for an explainatiom or smth #shanks doing two 180 spims before putting the hat on luffy... the pizzazz.... the drama..... #well what was i saying.... evil shanks or smth... hidden intentions idk.... why isnt shanks pirate king yet... suspicious.... #MAKINO HAS A BABY... and back to ad breaks... another asexual reproduction specimen see.... i know i am right #REIJU GAVE LUFFY A RAID SUIT FOR SANJI AKDHAKDJKS #him wearing black clothes..... like shirt and everything.... #sanji saying they already have franky to be weird akdhaks #NAMI KEPT ZEUS!!!!!!!!! FIRST SLAVE AND SANJI IS JEALOUS AKDHAKDHSKSJ 'I WAS THE FIRST SIMP!!' #but with part of her soul being away form big mom.... how.... she is coming back for that #luffy planned everytjing HAHAHAHHAHA oof bonneh on the sidelines of the paper... i know i know.... #sanji realising his rep went up bc of germa ajsjahdj where is namis bounty??? and luffys???? #back to the reverie.....SHIRAHOSHI IS GOING YEAAAAHHHH (bc luffy might call her weak again no other reason) #crocodile smiling at the paper... i see you #cavendish and barto spreading gossip ajdhak garp must be fuming!!!! #LUFFY IS THE FIFTH YONKOU??? ALREADY!!???? i said he has no territories....but maybe gyojin island counts #just saw a comment saying makinos child is shanks b plan in case luffy fails akdhaksjk #talking tag #watching one piece #episode 878

[faeriebabee]

god the fact that i am going to watch people go from “uwu lil innocent baby oak” to “when will oak greenbriar’s morally gray ass step on me!!!” in real time is just now sinking in

#holly black is going to have use actual magic if she wants me to simp for him #he's going to be out here doing deranged holly black male mc shit and i'm going to be like damn #who let jude duarte's feral baby brother stay out past curfew #and if my hunch is correct it is ms duarte herself #lady nore starts causing problems and jude calls her brother up and says hey you remember suren #i need you to be recruit her for a fun little quest that i can't do bc im busy politicking #anyway #oak greenbriar #the stolen heir #tfota

[frog-pokemon-friend]

Im cuddling sidon

er, MY sidon

#//insert offscreen sidon simping because she called him hers :3

[helenana666]

.

#Idk if I should feel pissed or finding it funny but #My youngest sister loves miles morales since the moment that movie came at the time my sis were 14-16 Ig #So now she is 19 and she is still a simp for Miles so she shared a ig story about it and some random mf called her weirdo for liking him☠️ #Like wtf my sis is not an influencer or whatever but damn #Imagine having that much of a brainroot to call out for a person to have a fictional crush with a fictional character #That technically you grew up with #I know my sister and she just have a Lil innocent crush😭 leave her alone #Her romantic life sucks enough so let her think of a man that would actually care about her👺 #That's all lol #helenatalks