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eschergirls · 3 years

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Originally published at: https://eschergirls.com/photo/2021/08/27/gaming-mags-1-weird-trick-get-your-girlfriend-do-what-you-want

From my friend Jess Morrisette on Twitter:

The May 2000 issue of PC Accelerator encouraged readers to "take these next two pages, cut them out, and slyly insert them into your wife/girlfriend/sister/mom's copy of Cosmo." This was a PC gaming magazine.

And further commentary from Jess:

I bet the editorial staff still has occasional shoulder pain from all the high fives they gave each other while writing this.

Not super on topic, but relevant to representation of women in gaming and gaming magazines.

I had to transcribe this and I literally hate every sentence and word. Obligatory fatphobic joke, of course, and uh... I don't know why they did the girlfriend making out with sister thing but okay...

It's soooo painful to read, it's not even well-written whether the humor is your thing or not. Also 44DD? Somebody doesn't know how bra sizes work... (it's a US magazine so presumably that's a US size that they think means small body and big breasts).

(As mentioned in previous posts, PC Accelerator was meant to be a Maxim styled humour magazine for the gamer set). They also did that "Age of Consent II" faux ad.

Full transcription below:

Page 1:

top of page reads: why don't you...

top left:

...look like this? Face facts: if you don't look like this, then you are ugly.

[accompanying photo of a thin white woman in lingerie lying on a chair in black and white]

top right:

...grab him a beer! Why? Why the hell not? He's thirsty and the lovely collection of hops and barley is just what he wants. For variation on this winning tip, you can also bring him several beers, bring him beers in the buff, and make him some food to go with the beer. Get to it.

[accompanying photo of a thin white woman in a bikini pouring a pitcher of beer into a cup]

middle:

...wake him up with a hummer Not only will it make your man happy, which is always important, but scientists have also proven that a man's ... uhh ... man milk makes for a tasty, low-calorie, fat-burning, life-enriching treat. New studies have shown that frequent falatio actually reduces your chance of cancer, gets rid of unwanted cellulite, eliminates the needs for periods, and lessens cravings for chocolate. Isn't it time you started going down?

[next to the paragraph are a small photo of the back of an overweight woman with the word "Before" next to large photo of a thin woman in a bikini lying down on a beach with the word "after"]

bottom left:

...shut the hell up! Silence is golden and no, he doesn't want to hear about your day at work (unless of course, it involves hot woman-on-woman sex), your problems, or any of that other trivial shit. Shut it already!

[accompanying photo of a blonde white woman with her mouth open and the caption: "What men hear: "blah, blah, blah""]

...realize that bigger is better That skinny no-boob Kate Moss look is so five minutes ago. Sporting anything smaller than a 44 DD bra size is an insult to the women who pioneered much-needed breast augmentation research. Besides, guys love big ta-tas ... and maybe you will too if given half a chance.

[Accompanying photo of a blonde white woman with a tight top over large breasts pressed against her body with the caption: "Almost there"]

Bottom of page reads "104 COSHMOPOLITAN [sic] MAY 2000"

#commentary #links #pc accelerator #magazines #general sexism #fatphobia #representation #video games #off topic #double standards

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pardondoyouhavejams · 4 years

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Can We Just Talk?

Pairing: Gender neutral!Y/N x childhood bestfriend!Taehyun

Word Count: 4.3K

Genre: Angst, fluffy ending, best friends to lovers AU! Highschool!AU

Warnings: Mild cursing, some bullying, also I didn’t proofread :P

Synopsis: Growing up with Taehyun by your side was all you could ask for in a best friend, but when high school slowly starts to separate you two, you realize you might’ve taken your time together for granted. Was this how you two parted ways?

*gif not mine*

“What? Did you want some?” You turned to see Taehyun holding out his goldfish to you. You had been daydreaming again and he had understood something was on your mind. Grabbing a handful of goldfish, Taehyun smiles and scooted closer, “what are you dazed about this time?”

See now, you didn’t want to tell him how you thought about him running his delicate hands through your hair. How you thought about his strong arms trapping you in a warm embrace, or how his plush lips would feel against yo-

“Y/N? I asked you a question,” snapping you out of your trance, you glance over at him. “It’s nothing, just stressed about the chem exam tomorrow,” you lied through your teeth. He nodded and smiled, knowing full well you were lying, but he didn’t want to pry you. He figured you’d tell him on your own if it was something major bothering you.

That was one of the last, full conversations you two shared for 3 months. 3 months ago, you practically lost your lifelong best friend to a group of popular kids and Soo Ah. She has a crush on Taehyun and everyone knows that...well..everyone except Taehyun. For someone so intelligent, he was so oblivious to the way she acted. He was never good with telling if someone had a crush on him and just thought they were super nice. He’s not stupid, just really blind.

Luckily for you, this played in your favor at times you slipped up and were way too obvious about your crush.

You pushed yourself away from Taehyun because the more you stuck around him, the more you fell in love with him. He noticed the space growing between you two and tried to make things up to you, but after a while, he stopped trying. He thought you just needed some space and that’s what he gave you. Over time, the space became overbearing and he had drifted to his new friends.

Skipping lunch, you headed to the school’s courtyard to scroll through your phone under the shade of a tree. It was a bit cooler out, autumn having just started. “Hey stupid!” Your head shooting up at the name only to see Beomgyu jogging over to you, a dumb smile plastered on his handsome face.

Beomgyu was one of yours and Taehyun’s mutual friends, alternating the days he’d spend his lunch with Taehyun and you. He knew everything about you and Taehyun slowly drifting, your massive crush on him, and everything in between.

He sat next to you, leaning against the trunk of the tree. He glanced at your phone, resting his chin on your shoulder. “OW, Beomgyu, your chin is sharp as hell,” “Hun, I know my jawline can cut, but you don’t have to be so aggressive,” he smirked at you. You shoved his face away (lightly) and scoffed, “please, if I wanted to say anything about your jawline, it’s that you need to work on it.” That was a flat out lie because Beomgyu had the sharpest jawline in the school but you didn’t want to admit it. “What’re you doing out here? Thinking about Taehyun?” he teased you. You eyed him, “yeah and? What about it?”

You missed Taehyun, a lot. You wished you could’ve just gotten over this stupid crush and stayed friends. If you had any ideas on becoming friends again without it being awkward, you’d have done that already, but to no avail. “Any plans on getting him back or winning his heart over?” Beomgyu grinned at you, making you really tempted to flick his forehead.

The two of you heard loud laughter and chattering, and when you looked over, it was Taehyun’s group, as you expected. Letting out a sigh, you went back to scrolling mindlessly through Twitter. What you didn’t know was Taehyun had returned the gaze when you put your head down.

What you also didn’t know was that Taehyun missed you even more, but he didn’t know if it was okay to approach you. He thought you might need more space, afraid he’s making you uncomfortable. He was so lonely without you by his side and his new friends weren’t as genuine as you were.

The bell rang and Beomgyu pulled you up off the ground, slinging an arm around your shoulders as you guys walked to your class together, math. You hated math, you could never grasp what was going on, but Taehyun would make that class bearable for you. That is, until, you know…

You sat in your assigned seat, Beomgyu letting go of you and going to his behind you. Taehyun and Soo Ah came in shortly after, Taehyun being on your right and Soo Ah on Taehyun’s other side. It was just your luck to be assigned to that seat, but at least Beomgyu was right there.

Searching through your bag, you couldn’t find your pencil. Turning around to face Beomgyu, you knew full well he took your spare pencil, “Gyu, I need my pencil.” “Wha-what pencil, pfft, I don’t have your pencil,” Beomgyu smiled at you, slowly moving the borrowed pencil under the desk. “I’m serious, I can’t find my pencil and you took my spare,” he pinched your cheek and just giggled, “Let me have it please, I forgot mine again.” You scoffed at Beomgyu for the nth time that day, he’s so forgetful.

Settling on looking for a pen, you turn back around to see a pencil sitting on your desk. You knew it wasn’t yours, looking around to see who put it there, your eyes met Taehyun’s, who smiled brightly at you. Mouthing a “thank you,” you turned back around to give Beomgyu a quick flick to the forehead before facing forward again when the teacher walked in. “OW!” he whisper-shouted, making you chuckle a bit, and unknowingly, Taehyun laughed to himself too.

The rest of the day went by far too slow, but you could finally leave this hellhole and that’s all that mattered to you. Walking out of your last class, you were heading home when you felt someone put their hand on your shoulder. “Y/N! Wait!” the familiar sound of Taehyun’s voice in your ears.

You turned your head to see a slightly out-of-breath Taehyun who had ran out of the classroom to catch up with you. “Can we please talk?” he asked, surprised by his sudden approach, you nod your head. He’s quick to move as he slides his hand down from your shoulder to your wrist. He drags you to the same tree you were under in the courtyard, where you sat with Beomgyu during lunch.

Taehyun looked down at you, almost like he was in pain, “Y/N, what happened to us?” You were a bit taken aback by his straightforwardness, unsure of what exactly to say. “I’m not sure Taehyun, I really don’t know,” your voice getting softer towards the end of the sentence. You were lying right to his face, you knew why the distance grew and you felt as though it was partially your fault. “Y/N, please don’t lie to me, you know I’m always here for you and I won’t judge you. You kept pushing me away so I gave you space cause I thought you might need some alone time, but it’s been too long. Let me be by your side, through whatever you may be going through, please.” His voice broke, his normally bright and smiling eyes showing a sense of longing in them.

You felt terrible and you didn’t want your friendship to end like this, “I’m sorry Taehyun, I-“ “Taehyun-ah! Let’s go!” In the distance stood Soo Ah, waving her hand at him. When Taehyun faced her, she was already walking towards him, smiling at Taehyun and only Taehyun. Your heart cracked at the sight of them in front of you. “Taehyun, we were supposed to go out together after class. I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Soo Ah glancing in your direction after saying “go out TOGETHER.”

You could feel your heart hammering against your chest when Taehyun smiled at her. “Oh yeah, sorry, let’s go?” Taehyun’s grasp finally leaving your wrist from when he first dragged you through the hallways just a few minutes ago. You watched as Soo Ah linked arms with him, walking off, the two of them acting as if you weren’t even there.

A single tear falling from your eye as you watched them walk off together, Soo Ah turning back to you and smirking. Furiously wiping the tear away, you quickly walked to Beomgyu’s house.

“Holy fUCK, Y/N!” Beomgyu jumped up from his bed, startled that you were in his house, his bedroom door flinging open from your impatience.

He was still wearing his school uniform but the necktie loosened and the first button undone. Beomgyu noticed the tears pooling in the corners of your eyes as you gasped and hiccuped, trying to hold everything in.

He walked over, embracing you tightly, “Wanna tell me what happened?” You finally let everything out, your tears nonstop, stumbling over your words with hiccups, “T-taehyun and I w-were ta-talking about what ha-happened, whEn-when SoO-sOo Ah interrupted a-and..anD shE-she said h-her and T-taehyun were su-supposed to g-go out t-together, just-just the two o-of th-them.” “Y/N, breathe. You need to breathe.” He slowly stroked your head before pulling away to see your face.

After another half hour of crying and trying to explain a bit more of what happened, Beomgyu looked at you with a sad expression. He loved Taehyun but sometimes Taehyun was so dense.

“Gyu?” “Hm?” “Do you think Taehyun likes his new friends more than me? Do you think...he likes Soo Ah more than me?” Your voice trailed off at the end. “I don’t think so, Y/N. I know it seems like he does but something seems a bit off when he’s with them, like he’s not as happy with them. I’ve seen the way he acts when he’s with you and when he’s with them. As for Soo Ah? I’m not sure, hun.”

The next day, your first few classes passed in a blur. You walked outside during lunch like usual, having no appetite or willpower to walk into the cafeteria knowing you’ll see Taehyun and his group at the table closest to the door.

You were sitting under the usual tree, looking through social media but not paying much attention to any of it. You heard footsteps approach you but didn’t think much of it, assuming it was Beomgyu. Who you thought was Beomgyu was wearing a pair of shoes you knew didn’t belong to him.

You glanced up to see Soo Ah looking down at you, “Can I help you?” Soo Ah, arms crossed, said “Yeah you can, stay away from Taehyun. I’m gonna confess to him today and I know he’ll say yes, so I need you to back off.” Scoffing at her confidence, you narrowed your eyes at her, “what makes you think he likes you?” “I just know he does, the way he looks and smiles at me, I suggest you cut off all contact with him before I do it for you.” You raise a brow at her, unimpressed by her response, “trust me, you’re not special enough for him to accept your confession.” This time, Soo Ah scoffed at you, “Yeah? Then why’d he leave you to be with me, hm?”

You were completely speechless, all you could do was glare, because she wasn’t exactly wrong. Before you knew it, you felt an ice cold liquid running down your head, wetting your uniform. “Y/N!” You heard that same familiar voice shout your name. Taehyun came running over, seeing the whole thing, Beomgyu right on his tail, outside long enough to see you get covered in water.

Taehyun had held his hand out to help you up from where you were sitting on the ground, but you got up on your own. He looked at you, worried and unsure of what to do, “are you okay?” completely ignoring Soo Ah’s presence. Taehyun reaches out to try and hold you, hug you, something, however, you shoved him away.

“Don’t act like you care,” you barked, confusion was plastered on his face, “What are you talking about? I’ve always cared, Y/N.” “Oh really? Cause for the past three months it surely seems like you didn’t care enough to still be friends with me. You didn’t care enough to finish talking to me yesterday but ran off with Soo Ah to go on your little date. You didn’t care enough to talk to me or even be with me when you saw me alone these past three months. So when? When did you care?” you seethed through your teeth, your jaw clenching in anger.

Taehyun scoffed, in complete disbelief that you would say that, “Me?? Not caring? As if, Y/N. That’s pure bullshit, when have I not cared? When you first started pushing me away I still tried to keep us together because I didn’t want to lose you, but you still kept pushing me further away. I thought you just wanted to be alone so I let you. I was waiting for when you were ready to talk because I thought we were friends, but you didn’t trust me enough to tell me anything. I’m not stupid, Y/N, I know you were lying every time I asked you if you were okay or what you were thinking about. It seemed like YOU didn’t care. You made no effort to keep me by your side, you made no effort to tell me or talk to me about it. Are you kidding me? I’m the one who doesn’t care?” By this time, Beomgyu had dragged Soo Ah away to leave you two alone to talk, not wanting to be there for something he shouldn’t see or hear.

“I DO care, Taehyun. God, do you think I would’ve liked you for so long if I DIDN’T care?” At this point, tears of agony and pent up anger were streaming down your face like a waterfall; freefalling. “You...you what?” Taehyun was clearly shocked by what you had said, and it finally hit you.

You just confessed. You just told him how you felt after all this time. Quickly grabbing your bag, you sprinted to the girls bathroom, breezing past Beomgyu on the way there. Taehyun started to chase after you to catch up, but who knew you could run so fast in this situation? You slammed the stall door and collapsed against it, covering your mouth to muffle your sobs.

Wiping your tears was no use because they just kept coming. Suddenly, a voice echoed into the bathroom from the door, “Y/N? It’s Beomgyu, if you need anything, I’m right outside okay? I can lend you my jacket to cover the wet spot on your uniform. If you want, we can go to the nurse’s office so you don’t have to go to class.”

Finally managing to stop the tears, you wiped your face, not even trying to cover up the fact that you were just sobbing. Your eyes were far too red and puffy for you to try and trick anyone. You walked out of the bathroom, your head hanging. Beomgyu had covered you with his jacket, leading you to the nurse’s office.

After about five aimless minutes, you two walked out of the nurse’s office, the nurse saying there’s nothing she can do about your “stomach pains.” Beomgyu tried to argue with her but you just pulled him out, telling him it’s no big deal.

Of course it wasn’t “no big deal” to you, because you didn’t want to have to go to the rest of your classes when Taehyun was in every one of your last few periods.

You and Beomgyu walked into class, your eyes looking anywhere but at Taehyun. Slowly sliding into your seat, you scoot as far from Taehyun as possible without moving your desk. He seemed to have noticed though, a sudden sharp intake of breath coming from him.

Every class after lunch had felt increasingly long, but when the final bell rang, you packed your things and practically sprinted out like your life depended on it.

You ran all the way back home, lucky that it wasn’t too far from the school.

On your way home, you prayed that Taehyun wasn’t behind you, but you heard his voice booming from just a few feet behind you. Picking up the pace, you reached your front door, house key already in hand. Somehow you managed to get the door open and slip through just before he reached the handle.

You locked the door behind you, panting from having run so fast for so long. P.E. did not prepare you enough for moments like this. Taehyun started pounding on the door, “Y/N, please! We need to talk.” Before you knew it, your eyes were pooling with tears again, “I really don’t want to talk to you right now, Taehyun. Please leave.”

Checking the peep hole, you saw him breathing heavily as he looked down. “You can’t avoid me forever, Y/N, please. It’s pointless. We have to talk about it sooner or later.” “I don’t want to, I’ll avoid you if I want to,” you stated, you were nowhere near ready to approach him. You were unprepared emotionally and mentally, because all you could think about was how he’ll reject you.

After taking off your shoes, you slowly walked up the stairs, practically pulling yourself because of the lack of strength in your legs. You fell into your bed, letting out all your tears and frustration. The tears would not stop but you didn’t fight them. Everything came crashing down and you just felt so suffocated by it all.

Was this how your years of built up friendship just ended?

You didn’t even realize a few hours had passed already when you heard a light knock on your door, “Y/N? Come eat dinner now,” your brother, Hyunsik, softly called. You quickly wiped your tears, saying you weren’t hungry and he let you know the food was in the fridge when you felt like eating.

Y/N’s mom was downstairs when she heard knocking on the front door. She opened it to see Taehyun standing there, and with how long you’ve been friends for, he was like her second son.

“Oh! Taehyun-ah, what brings you here?” He quickly bowed, “Hello 어머니 (eomeoni), is Y/N home?” “Oh yes she is, but did something happen to her? She hasn’t come out of her room since she got home and her lights have been off the whole time.” Taehyun fidgeted with the hem of his hoodie, faking a smile and saying, “she told me she’s feeling a bit unwell so I came to check up on her, if that’s okay.”

Your mom smiled brightly at him, “ah you’re so sweet, if only my real son were this nice to Y/N,” she said, making sure she was loud enough for your brother to hear. Taehyun giggled a bit and your mom let him in, ushering him upstairs.

He slipped his shoes off and walked up to your room. His hand hovered for a bit when he finally knocked on the door softly, when he heard a groan come from the other side of the door, “Hyunsik, I told you I’m not hungry.”

Taehyun cleared his throat a bit, “It’s uh..it’s Taehyun.” Your eyes widened, why the hell was he here now? “Why-why are you here?” “I told you I need to talk to you, let me in please.” You got up from the bed, your hand floated above the doorknob, you really didn’t want to see him right now but he was already inside your house.

You slowly pulled the door open, just enough for him to slip inside, then walked to the other side of your room, wanting to keep space between you two. He shuffled in slowly before quietly shutting the door behind him. Taehyun reached for the light switch to turn it on, you hissed slightly from the sudden brightness paining your eyes when you had been laying in the dark for hours.

Both of you were silent for a minute, letting tension fill up the space. He studied your figure, how you were slouched and your breathing was rigid from crying. You were still wearing your school uniform, Beomgyu’s oversized jacket draped over you.

When you had let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, you had asked, “why’d you come he-“ You couldn’t even finish your question when Taehyun had cut you off, “do you really like me?”

There was no point in you trying to deny it, all you could do was nod at his question. His gaze softened and he began to walk closer to you.

“So you mean to say that you’ve been avoiding me because you like me?” Taehyun’s voice having a hint of pain behind the tone, but you tried not to pay any mind to it. You let out another sigh, nodding at what he said.

“Look, if you came here just to interrogate me, then please leave. I already told you I don’t want to talk about it right now, so can we please just drop it and forget what happened?” “No. I want to talk about it, whether you like it or not. I’ve constantly let you go when you don’t want to talk about something, but I don’t care this time, you’re going to talk to me about it one way or another, Y/N.”

For some reason, you were split in deciding. Part of you wanted to just spill everything and just tell him, but the other part of you wanted to hold onto your pride and have him leave.

“Taehyun, I’m not in the mood to-“ you were cut off by him once more, “I don’t care. Do you know the amount of times I knew something was bothering you but didn’t say anything? Do you know how many times you hurt me because you kept wanting to push me away? Do you have any idea how much that hurts?”

The pain in his voice was becoming more evident. Taehyun now stood in front of you, his eyes shifting to study your facial features before landing on your eyes, “Why can’t you just talk to me? You’re making this harder than it needs to be, Y/N. Haven’t you always talked to me about your problems before? What about now? I need to understand where you’re coming from.”

“Understand? What more is there to understand? You heard me loud and clear and I know you did. Yeah I like you,but so what? You’re busy running off with your new friends and Soo Ah. It’s enough to tell me that you obviously don’t feel the same. Don’t you get it? I avoided you because I knew it was one sided and I honestly didn’t want to bother going through the pain of rejection.”

You noticed the corners of Taehyun’s lips were tugged into a small smirk, “Who said I would reject you?” Your head shot up at this, surprised but also confused. “What do you mean?” your brows furrowed, making eye contact with him. He only stepped closer, your faces only being inches apart, leaning down a bit so he was at eye level with you,

“Why would I reject you when I like you too?”

Instantly, your face had flushed, taken aback by his confidence, “wait, you do?” Taehyun nodded, breaking out into a grin, “Duh, I’m surprised you didn’t catch on ages ago, I was so obvious. That’s why I thought you pushed me away, cause you found out and didn’t know how to say no.”

You automatically felt a smile forming on your face as you threw yourself onto him, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in his chest. He giggled at this, picking you up and swinging you around, causing you to start giggling too.

Taehyun set you back down, pulling away from the hug to look at your face, “So then uh..will you be my (girl/boy)friend?” Smiling even harder, you nodded your head almost aggressively, “duh!” He picked you up a second time, spinning you both in a circle before you two crashed onto your bed, big, bright, and stupid grins plastered on your faces.

Suddenly you froze, sitting up to face Taehyun, causing him to do the same, “Hold on, you said you’re surprised I didn’t catch on ages ago. So then how long have you liked me?” You were a bit shocked that it didn't hit you earlier, Taehyun scooted closer to you, leaning against your headboard, shrugging casually saying, “about three years ago?” You whipped your head around to face him, “Are you KIDDING ME? I could’ve been dating you THREE YEARS AGO?”

Taehyun immediately started laughing at your reaction, while you were still gawking at the fact he’s liked you for as long as you liked him. Your hand extended towards his side, poking him, “What? What’s so funny?” you pouted at him. He reached out to pull you close to him, your faces so close you could feel his breath against your skin. His eyes went back and forth between your eyes and your lips, your eyes doing the same, glancing at his eyes and then his lips.

“Can I kiss you?”

Your cheeks immediately turned bright red, but nonetheless, you slowly nodded only for his hand to slide up to the nape of your neck, pulling you in for a kiss. Both of your lips moved in sync, working against each other’s until he pulled away to catch his breath. Now he was turning bright red, smiling at you, only for you to grab his collar and pull him back in for another kiss.

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randomobsessionsofa30something · 4 years

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My top 10 korean dramas of 2019

10. Extraordinary you. Based on a webtoon, I actually almost missed this one because it looked like the typical high school drama but I got curious and watched it. The story is about a girl that realizes she is actually a secondary role on a webtoon and that her life is being written by the author. Nevertheless she makes the decision to make her own story and falling for whoever she chooses. It definitely is a silly rom-com but with a spin. The chemistry between SF9′s RoWoon and Kim Hyeoyeon is what made binge watch the 32 episodes (around 35 minutes each) in just a couple of days.

9. Her private life. Kim Jae Wook and Park Min Young star in this really fun rom-com based on a korean webtoon about a girl that lives a double life: being an art gallery curator and also a devoted super fan of a member of an idol group (played by One). However everything changes when the new gallery director, Ryan, arrives with an agenda that will make her worlds collide. I wasn’t a huge fan of how they portrayed super fans. I thought it was a missed opportunity of really getting into the mindset of a those kind of fans.

8. Vagabond. The first episode of this drama really got me excited about it but somehow after a couple of episodes I started loosing interest. When I watched it after a while I somehow finished the whole thing. I think it had its ups and downs but all in all an interesting action romance drama. Lee Seung Gi plays a stunt man that somehow finds himself a father figure to the son of his deceased sister. Money troubles weights him down but he works hard to make a decent living for his nephew. However the kid passes away along with several others in a plane crash. He discovers it wasn’t an accident and he turns his life around to take justice at his own hands. Along the way she meets an agent of an intelligence agency (played by Suzy) and they both work to find the people behind the plane crash.

7. When the camellia blooms. The main characters of this one are not only endearing but really funny. Gong Hyo Jin has always been one of my favorite korean actresses and this is my favorite part Kang Ha Neul has done. This popular drama is about a single mother who owns a bar and a policeman who falls for her and will stop at nothing until he wins her heart but nothing will come easy for these two, they will have to face several challenges from a killer on the loose to a conservative mother.

6. Chief of Staff. This drama had two seasons last year something different from the usual modus operandi of korean dramas. Honestly I enjoyed the first season more but even if the story line was a bit messy sometimes, it really was an interesting political drama. Lee Jung Jae plays a character that definitely made me remember House of Cards and The West Wing but in a very korean setting. A former detective is now chief of staff to a congressman and has strong ambicions but he always seems to be stopping fires. It was a very well made drama. Shin Min Ah, Lee Eljah, Kim Dong Joon, Jung Woong In and Kim Kap Soo were all amazing on this one.

5. SKY CASTLE. This drama gave much to talk about in Korea because it revolves around the pressure parents put on their children to make it to the best universities in the country. The story is set in a rich neighbourhood in Seoul and it shows how some parents will stop at nothing to make their children excel and how it reflects on those children. That dynamic made for an intense 20 episodes. The cast did an amazing job.

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4. Hotel Del Luna. This was a great fantasy drama and I was going to rank it higher but truth is in the second part I felt like they drag the conclussion a bit more than necessary. IU plays Jang Man-Wol the “owner” of Hotel del Luna a place where spirits stay before they pass on. Goo Chang-seong (Yeo Jin Goo) is an assitant manager of a hotel corporation who suddenly learns his father made a deal with a woman that he would have to work in her hotel except her hotel in unlike any other. He’s forced to work there but he refuses to do things like Manwol wants him to and tries to change her mind set. She lives with regrets which has made her have a bad attitude but her walls start to fall down with Chang Seong around. This drama was truely addictive.

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3. One Spring Night. This drama by Ahn Pan Seok was beautifully shot and it deals with how single fathers are looked in a conservative society like Korea and how parents put pressure on their kids to marry well. The tone is definitely similar to Something in the Rain, his previous work also starred by Jung Hae In. Han Ji Min plays a girl in her 30s that has a boyfriend who she’s expected to settle down with but realizes she doesn’t want to marry him just because it’s about time. She meets a single father and she falls for him but society gets in the way and they both will need to decide whether they are strong enough to go against social standards to be together

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2. Crash landing on you. I was waiting for a Hyun Bin drama and finally he did this one with Son Ye Jin and it really turned out great. It’s still airing so I might be making a mistake by ranking this one so high. I really love it though and it’s clearly popular since it’s making double digit ratings which for a cable drama is difficult. The story is about a girl that has an accident that lands her on North Korean soil and seeks help with a North Korean officer to help her return to South Korea. He agrees and they fall in love in the process. It makes for a sweet fun drama but the fact that they are from two countries in conflict will make it difficult to stay together.

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1. WWW: Search. Sometimes you just connect with a drama and that’s what happened to me with this one. It might not have been the greatest love story on this list or the most innovative drama. However I was really drawn by the main character played by Im Soo Jung and also by the script .She really is a strong female character. I think the story really made some really good points regarding the power of social media in Korea as well as how corruption can disrupt the truth. Korea has a web portal in real life called Naver that basically works both as google and as twitter since it shows the top related searches constantly which makes all internet users aware of when something is popular whether is about politics or entertainment. In the drama there’s two portals that do just that: Unicon and Baro, Bae Ta-Mi is a director of Unicon but is betrayed and ends up switching companies to Baro and makes her goal to beat Unicon and make Baro the most used portal in Korea. At the same time, she meets a young CEO (Jang Ki Young) of a small music company for games and he tries to date her after a one night stand. I also love the secondary couple played by Lee Dae Hae and Lee Jae Wook. The friendship between Lee Dae Hae’s character and Im Soo Jung is definitely one of the most fun parts of the drama.

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roidespd-blog · 5 years

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Chapter Nineteen : FRANCE TODAY

Third and final part of our absolutely tiring saga on France and its LGBTQ+community. As we came to talk about everything in the past tense, from the rise of the Gay Rights Movements, the AIDS epidemic to the Mariage pour Tous, now is the time to explore the present and what’s ahead of us. After that, no more France (Maybe. Probably. Let me fake promise that real quick.)

THE LAST FIVE YEARS

Let’s put it all out there right now. Acts of homophobic nature have been in constant high ever since the massive Mariage pour Tous debate. Although you saw a 38% drop from 2013 to 2014, it went up again in 2015 and never stopped. In the annual report from S0S Homophobie (which “celebrates” its 25 years of existence. Condragulations ?) for 2018, homophobic violence was up 15% from the year before. 1905 people reported various forms of abuse. I was one of them. Twice. Physical attacks against LGBTQ+ people were up 66%, from 131 to 231, with one attack reported per day in the last semester. It now seems like homophobia and intolerance are part of our french DNA.

The internet site Spartacus publishes each year a ranking of the most welcoming LGBTQ+ countries in the world. It judges said countries on fourteen different issues that constitute the basis of the Queer movement (Anti-discrimination Laws. Marriage/Civil Partnerships. Adoption. Transgender Rights. Equal Age of Consent. Religious Influence. HIV Travel Restrictions. Anti-Gay Laws. Homosexuality. Illegality. Pride Banned. Locals’ Hostility. ProsecutionMurders. Death Sentence). In 2018, France was a sixth most welcoming country for LGBTQ+ travelers. A year later, it was ranked seventeenth. It seems that our lower ranking is due to the hostility of our citizens towards LGBTQ+ people. In fact, off the top 24 countries (out of 197), we’re the only one to get a -1 in that category — For the record, the last on the list is Chechnya, with a staggering -5 on the death sentence column.

Insults. Rejection. Ignorance. Defamation. Discrimination. Harassment. Outings. This is French LGBTQ+ people’s daily bread. Is that the price to pay for equal recognition under the law ?

WHAT’S UP WITH THE PEOPLE ?

If interested, I urge you to read the SOS Homophobe report for 2018. It’s a hefty 164 pages but it’s full of precious informations. So. The people. LGBTQ+ populations are still being persecuted, but this time it comes from the people. “Positively”, a trending fact for 2018 was the victims’ courage to speak out and report those attacks either on social media or to the police. One might say that the report seems more alarming because people speak out more, contrary to previous years. Fuck those people. It’s alarming. End of sentence. But if victims go more and more to social media to denounce injustices, social media is still a nest of hateful speeches from the scum of the earth. “La propagande des sodomites en action” posted one homophobe on Facebook. “Dommage qu’on ne soit pas dans les années 30 en Allemagne” said another about a 19 year-old lesbian girl outed on the same platform. “Les gens comme toi, on les brûle, on les viole”.

In November 2018, Bilal Hassani was chosen to represent France at this year’s Eurovision. Hassani is an openly gay genderfuckin singer-songwriter with a youtube channel where he talks about everything and anything. After the announcement, death threats, homophobic and racist tweets were invading his social media. The singer then posted a video talking about it, complaining about the lack of reactivity from Twitter and Facebook when it came to put a stop to it. When one Facebook user sent a warning about an offensive comment on the platform (“l’homosexualité est un péché, il faut l’éradiquer”), it was replied that the comment was not infringing on any of the site’s rules but sure, it could be seen as offensive. The user was only offered the possibility to block the author of the post. Social media is a double-edged sword. It gives you more exposure, better ways to interact with people like you, be celebrated for who you are. It also tries to take you down. And since the law hasn’t totally caught up with the cyber world, most racist, homophobic, sexist websites go through loops to keep their actions free of any consequences.

If only people were only hiding behind a screen. Unfortunately, being a public space has become a dangerous situation for any of the Ls, the Bs, the Gs, especially the Ts or any of the letters of the community. Parks, streets, subways. Anything can happen to us. People are usually attacked by groups of men in premedidated acts.

One of the most recent and choking attacks is dated March 31st in Paris, when 31 year-old Trans woman Julia was insulted, grabbed inappropriately, spit on, slapped and pushed around when she came out of a subway station at République. Videos of the attack went viral within minutes of the event. Julia later said the traumatic experience left her humiliated. The fact that it was filmed brought awareness to those problems and Julia went on to give a few interviews and gave a face to the injustice. That’s one brave woman.

Worst case scenario was the story of Vanessa Campos, a sex worker who was murdered in the night of August 16–17th 2018, defending herself against a group of men trying to bully and steal money from her community. It took weeks before any sorts of sympathies came from the government (it took a “marche blanche” organized by the people). The police was apparently aware of the previous acts of terrors perpetuated by this group of thugs and did nothing. Worst of all, the trash magazine that is Paris Match published pictures of Vanessa’s corpse and exploited her image while tarnishing her identity by using the pronoun “he” to describe the late victim.

One of the worst aspects of that every day reality — and I’m guilty of that as well — could be the trivialization of those acts as “it is what is”. Someone says “Faggot”, I shrug. A dirty look ? Well, I knew what kind of neighborhood I was in. A trans hooker is killed ? Well, she was a prostitute AND she was trans. Do you know why? Because that’s all we hear. From the moment we are conscious of words as children, jokes about faggots are made. Puns about lesbians are openly uttered. Transgender people and Bisexuals are great to make fun of in family dinners. It’s called “casual homophobia” and we’ve all been practicing it. “Fais pas ton enculé”, “Avec ta nouvelle coupe de cheveux, tu fais lesbienne”, “On est pas des pédé, ici”.

The practice of ignorance and the absence of second thoughts on our actions and words are what’s keeping the homophobia alive and well. We live in a different time. Queer people are there. They exist and they are so diverse. Now is the time for cis people to collect those informations, try to understand them and mostly, to course correct their behavior. Do not talk like your parents because that’s what you’ve been hearing all your life and it feels normal. No, it’s not. Not anymore.

WHAT’S UP THE WITH LAW ?

Are we safe ? In the anti-discrimination law department, we’re getting a 2 out of 3 in the Spartacus scale. Not so bad, I guess. In fact, numerous laws and amendments are here to protect/avenge us, in the cases of torture (Art.222–3 5 TER CP), murder (ART.221–4 7CP), Violence (ART.222–10/222–8/222–12/222–13), rape (ART.222–24 9 CP), other kinds of sexual abuse (ART.222–30 6 CP), threats (ART.222–18–1 CP), insults (ART.R.624–4 CP) and so on and so on. Now you are considered discriminated against when you are refused a service, a job, a raise, when people are making your life more difficult IF the reason seems to be your sexual orientation. You can always go to the police but then, you’ll have to prove it. Same goes for the insults. If someone tells you “faggot”, it doesn’t matter if you are one or not, or if the person knows your sexual identity or not, you can sue. Not a “main courante”, but sue his/her/their ass(es). But careful, because then again, you’ll have to prove it. And it’s a long, long process.

Another important problem in 2019. The police. I’m not going to try and tear a new one to them because we all know you can’t take an entire section of people and judge them the same way, but cases of unprofessionalism are everywhere and known. That’s why the datas on LGBTQ+ attacks are somewhat completely false, since most Queer people do not feel heard by the law and their representatives and therefore do not report any wrong doings. In Lille last year, a couple was insulted and physically abused on the street on the premise that they were faggots walking together. They were refused access to the police station as a police officer told them that they “should not have held each other by the arm. It was a provocation”. In Lyon, same story. The police refused to come to the scene of the attack, saying that the attackers were already gone and there was no point to go there. In Dordogne, a police officer said to a victim that he couldn’t file a complaint because “lopette” wasn’t a clear homophobic term. That is not true.

If you ever (and I hope you won’t) have to go through this, know that any derogatory term that are even slightly homophobic gives you the right to register a formal complaint, not a “main courante”. And if the officer is not cooperative, you ask to speak to his superior right away and you don’t leave until you are heard. If possible, go with a supporting loved one. I was lucky enough to run into a very comprehensive and caring police officer and took every single detail of my claim and treated me with respect. He even called me a few weeks later to tell me that the dossier had been sent to the Parquet de Justice and that something will be done. Sweet guy. It does not always work that way. “Vous l’avez pas un peu cherché?” would be the scariest thing to hear at a police station. Seeing officers laugh at the story of you getting chased on the street by a homophobe willing to break your jaw. Having an indifferent person at the other side of your phone call while your boyfriend is bleeding heavily from getting beaten with metal bars.

Also know that if the abuse, in the case of insults, are not accompanied by solid proofs, the case will be easily dismissed by the Justice department. In the best case scenario, there will be a “rappel à la loi” in which the abuser will be auditioned and sermoned, maybe a letter of apology. Then nothing. And if by any chance you go to court, the judge might call the verbal abuse you’ve been the victim of a simple “neighbor’s quarrel”. In 2017, only 25 cases led to conviction in front of a judge. That’s fucked up.

WHAT’S UP WITH RIGHTS ?

In terms of rights, we’ve already established that gay people can legally marry one another, that they are no longer considered mental ill and they can adopt kids (though two parents of the same sex cannot be on the birth certificate of the child). Yeah ?

But one of the big topics of 2018 and still very much alive in 2019 is the implementation of the PMA (Procréation Médicalement Assistée or IVF in english) for single women and lesbian couples. The CCNE (Comité Consultatif National d’Ethique) is favorable to open the practice to all, but the Conseil d’Etat, not so much. Clearly an inequality under the law, it seems that the pushback comes from the public opinion that influences the government. The methods to take that public opinions is, at best, shady, since its based only on forums organized by the CCNE to talk about those issue. 21,000 people participated in those events, filled with anti-PMA and religious subgroups, and also members of the newly-statured political party Manif pour Tous.

I told you we would talk about them again. MPF transitioned into a political party in April of 2015, although weirdly, they never presented any candidates to the European, Presidential or Municipal elections that followed. Apparently, the political status was designed to gain financial grounds and be exempt of many important taxes. Oh, you fuckers.

Anyway, they are very involved with the question of PMA. They recently announced (last week, actually) new actions and manifestations to protest the access of the procedure to single and gay women.

The PMA will be examined in September of this year in front of Parliament, following a statement from Edouard Phillippe, who finally decided to follow one of Emmanuel Macron’s campaign promises of 2017.

Meanwhile, debates on the GPA (Gestation Pour Autrui) will be blocked as the government has no intentions to legalize it either to the straight couples or the gay couples — but I’m guessing putting it on the table for the straight ones would open pandora’s box for the fags. Right ?

Finally, my one big concern come to blood donations and the restrictions we still have to face. Since June 1st, 2016, gay and bi men can give blood under the condition that they practice abstinence for a whole year. That’s kind of an improvement from the fact that before that, they were banned all together. But seriously ? How is our blood more dangerous that someone else’s ? Don’t you run tests before you get blood from someone ? Can’t you impose a universal check up on people ? Are you so fearful of Aids in 2019 ? Are is it the multiple hepatitis that we, gay people, spread around one another like fancy glitter ? Don’t you know by now that those kind of problems are not limited to gay, bi and “men who have sex with men” men ? I said fuck way too much in that article, but FUCK. FUCK THE FUCK OFF YOU FUCKING FUCK. FUUUCK!

Shit. I’m gonna stop here. I’m done. There are so much shit I haven’t talked about yet ! The mutilation of intersex babies (scandalous), the transgender rights (still a pile of shit), the social media trend of outing people (what the living fuck ?), work place homophobia (beware), the racial bias for LGBTQ+ people of color (enough!).

I’m so fucking tired. I can’t take it anymore. France suuuuucks. (deep breath) (focus) (find your center) (take a step back) Better. We are making strides in multiples areas. There’s not denying it. But everything is so fragile. A change of government, a foreign influence and everything can disappear in an instant. I can still get killed on the street because that day, I was wearing pink nail polish and the wrong person saw it. People still wishes that concentration camps were a reality, on the basis of religious morals that have no place in secular societies. I can’t change homophobes. I can only enter into a dialogue when possible and protect myself as much as I can. But here’s my plea to you, Queer people. Yes, the strides are great. We can marry, we can adopt, we can inspire to very different lives from the previous generation of queers. But if you are a cis white gay man, get your head out of your perfectly bleached asshole and defend those who are less fortunate than you.

Our goal as a community should be right now to advance Transgender rights in this country. Our moral obligation is to understand and make people understand Intersex people and put a stop (either inside or outside the community) to the bias against bisexuals. We cannot be strong and thrive if we ignore each other. Be a little less selfish and solidify those way-too-fragile grounds that our ancestors who went through death penalties, epidemics and public humiliations built for us.

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ltbroccoli-archive · 7 years

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ST ask meme - ALL OF THEM

Star Trek ask meme

Under a read more, because long.

1. Top 3 favorite female characters? Kathryn Janeway, Seven of Nine, Uhura.

2. Top 3 favorite male characters? Reg Barclay, Rom, Data.

3. Top 3 least favorite characters? Katherine Pulaski, Wesley Crusher, Jadzia Dax. (I said Travis Mayweather on my other post but he’s honestly tied with Jadzia.)

4. Favorite alien species? I really enjoy the Borg. Voyager ruined them just the tiniest bit though, by overusing them.

5. Episode plot you wish they had handled differently? Several are coming to mind, but I think I’m actually gonna go with the Enterprise finale. Which I don’t remember terribly well but I remember that it sucked. Riker and Troi? Seriously? The least that show could have done was end on a reasonably high note. Granted it was never a great show in the first place…

6. Character you feel a show could have done without? Pulaski was so utterly unnecessary, and just horrible. I realize they wanted Gates McFadden gone, which was also a mistake. Just let her stay through the whole thing.

7. Who would make up your crew dream team? Captain Janeway, First Officer Spock, Chief Engineer Reg Barclay, Doctor EMH, Tactical Officer Worf, the rest can just fight for it idk.

8. Which captain would you most want to serve under? It’s a toss up between Picard and Janeway… I think Janeway wins by the tiniest bit. Picard would also be awesome.

9. Which episode plot do you prefer?

a. Time traveling to the past or dealing with time travelers from the future? The past. I love time travel everything give me all the time travel please.

b. Going undercover to spy on enemies or going undercover to explore pre-warp planets? Probably the enemies, but it really depends on the episode.

c. Holodeck malfunction or space anomaly? Depends what the holodeck malfunction is and what the space anomaly is. Holodeck malfunctions are always stupid, but we need to know if it’s the good kind of stupid.

d. Ship being taken over or being stranded on a planet? Taken over.

e. Rapid aging or de-aging? De-aging. “Rascals” is a gift.

f. Diplomatic negotiations or all out battle? Both? Both is good. (Negotiate to stop the battle.)

10. Which alien pet would you most want for your own? The unicorn dog.

11. Top 3 OTPs? Janeway/Chakotay, Doctor/Seven, Rom/Leeta

12. Top 3 NOTPs? Chakotay/Seven (seriously wtf), Dukat/Winn, Garak/Ziyal

13. A ship you wish had been canon and why? Garak and Bashir. They had great chemistry from their very first scene and it’s just such an interesting pair.

14. A ship you wish hadn’t been canon and why? Garak/Ziyal. She’s barely legal. They were only doing it so the Garak/Bashir shippers had no chance. It didn’t make sense. It was forced.

15. Top 3 favorite alien crewmembers? Spock, Worf, Seven of Nine.

16. If you could steal the basic plot of an episode for one show and apply to another which would you choose? Well Enterprise directly stole plots from other shows multiple times… honestly I can’t think of any.

17. What role would you have aboard a starship? Science officer…? Engineer? One of those.

18. If you had to fight a character who would you choose? Pulaski.

19. You can undo one plot point, which do you choose? Dukat joining the Pah-Wraiths. That’s the exact moment his arc went from absolutely incredible to just… a piece of shit.

20. Which piece of technology do you wish existed in reality? Transporter.

21. What kind of stories do you hope the new show does? Explore current issues. Make important points about our current world. Make people uncomfortable. Make people examine themselves and how they behave.

22. Would you rather serve on a starship or a space station? Space station, probably.

23. Favorite tropes? The non-human character trying to figure out what the hell humans are even doing.

24. Which character do you relate to the most? Reg Barclay.

25. Favorite villain(s)? Dukat, the Borg, the Dominion.

26. Which alien hybrid offspring are you most interested in seeing? Uh… this is really not something I thought about before. Maybe a Bolian and a Klingon. See how that one works out. (Yeah I just kinda picked two random races…)

27. What do you wish they had handled differently? A lot of Reg’s later TNG episodes treated him as comic relief. I would have liked to see more of him in a serious light and less comedic. And also directly acknowledging that he has anxiety of some kind, whatever that might be, would be great.

28. Character(s) you want to cosplay as? I really don’t do much cosplay, I’d be happy just to have a StarFleet uniform.

29. Favorite and least favorite episodes? I’ll just go one from each show, this is hard. These might not be the absolutes but they’re what popped into my head first.

Favorites - “The City on the Edge of Forever”, “Realm of Fear”, “Far Beyond the Stars”, “Bride of Chaotica!”, sorry I can’t consider any ENT episode to be a favorite.

Least favorites - “The Mark of Gideon”, “Sub Rosa”, “The Muse”, “Year of Hell”, “These Are the Voyages…”

30. Something you wish you could delete from canon? That ghost trying to bang Crusher? Yeah I completely skipped that episode on my rewatch, no thank you.

31. A crossover with another show/movie/book/ect, that you’d want to see? Doctor Who, Stargate, or Firefly.

32. F/M/K. I dunno. Someone give me three choices and I’ll answer this.

33. Whose twitter feed would you most want to follow? Data’s would be a blast, I think.

34. What do you think *insert character*’s tumblr would be full of? Someone has to send a character. Since I write Reg, I will say that Reg’s Tumblr would be cats, advice for dealing with anxiety, cool space pictures, cats, engineering facts, and cats.

35. A minor character you wish had become a main character? Reg Barclay. I always want more Reg Barclay.

36. A social issue you hope the new show tackles and how? Actual gay people would be nice.

37. Character A and Character B get into a fight, who wins? I need characters.

38. *Insert crew here* is thrown back in time to *insert time period here*, how do they handle it, which fashion trends do they pick up, who threatens the timeline the most, who is saddest when they have to leave, who is most knowledgeable, who stands out the most, ect? Again, I need things. Also this would take forever to answer, so…

39. You have to relocate to a planet other than Earth, which do you choose? …Vulcan? Andoria? Some Earth colony? Yeah probably an Earth colony, if there’s a nice big one.

40. If you got a trek inspired tattoo what would it be? I don’t think I’d get a tattoo… but I mean, if I were forced to get one at gunpoint for some reason, maybe the IDIC medallion on my ankle or something simple like that.

41. Which episode(s) creeped out/scared you the most? “Night Terrors”, the TNG episode where the crew can’t dream. When Crusher’s in the morgue and all the corpses are suddenly sitting up? I lost it the first time I saw that as a kid. Still creeps me the fuck out.

42. Which episode(s) made you cry? “Real Life”, the VOY episode with the Doctor’s holographic family that you never see again. I don’t know why that one got to me but it got to me.

43. Order of shows from most to least favorite? Deep Space 9, Next Generation, Voyager, Original Series, Enterprise, Animated. Honestly DS9, TNG, VOY, and TOS are all at about the same level for me, I love them all but in different ways. ENT is a noticeable step down in quality and TAS is uh… yeah.

44. If *insert crew* ended up in the modern day what would amaze them the most? Gotta give me a crew.

45. Which alien culture would you most want to live in/would feel most comfortable? Denobulans would be super friendly, I feel like.

46. If they rebooted *insert show here* who out of modern day actors would you pick to play the main characters? No more reboots.

47. An unpopular opinion you have? Jadzia Dax is the worst character on DS9. She’s an annoying know-it-all who can apparently do no wrong. She also has no character development to speak of and her episodes were always the most boring, despite the Trill being a fascinating race. Worf deserved better. Also, Terry Farrell never seemed the right choice for the part. I was glad to see her go and I genuinely don’t understand why this fandom worships the ground she walks on.

48. Sort the crew of *insert show here* into Hogwarts houses. Someone want to send a show?

49. A favorite ST fic? I don’t read much fanfic, actually. I did read one where Q was trying to help Reg get over his stage fright. That was pretty funny. I can’t remember where it was or I’d link to it.

50. A random headcanon? At some point after the episode “Hollow Pursuits”, Reg Barclay gave Deanna Troi a damn good (and completely genuine) apology for recreating her on the holodeck for make out sessions.

#anonymous #answered asks #ooc #Anonymous

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marco42james · 6 years

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What To Do When Someone Hates You

You Can Overcome

From the Cool Cat Teacher Blog by Vicki Davis

Follow @coolcatteacher on Twitter

“There is one way to avoid criticism: Do nothing. Say nothing. Be nothing.” says Aristotle. Criticism comes with breaking new ground. Criticism comes with putting yourself out there. But how do you respond when that criticism turns to hatred?

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Stream by clicking here.

Sponsored by Advancement Courses. Advancement Courses has more than 200 graduate level online professional development courses for K-12 teachers. You can take these courses for continuing education, salary advancement, or recertification. They are practical courses that have teachers developing tangible resources to use in their classrooms immediately. Go to advancementcourses.com/coolcat and use the code COOL20 at checkout to get 20% off any course. With this coupon, a 3 grad credit course is only $359.

Hatred is a hard thing to handle, particularly when you feel it is unjust. But I’m writing this for you today: DON’T LET IT STOP YOU.

Spread more love than hate

Theodore Roosevelt’s Man in the Arena

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

Theodore Roosevelt, Excerpt from the Speech “Citizenship in the Republic” given at the Sorbonne in Paris, France April 1910

We are all people of the arena. Every human has to cope with this question:

What to Do When Someone Hates You

Be you. But being you will often cause undeserved hate from others.

Hatred is a hard thing to handle. Humans usually possess a “me-centric” view of the world. We’ve all seen how two good people can have a vastly different opinions. It happens. No matter what you do, how kind you are, or anything else, I promise you this: In your human-ness, you will attract haters. No way around it.

Haters are an inevitable part of life if you’re accomplishing anything of worth. You can decide what to do about that.

It will also shock and surprise you just how long some people will nurse hatred. It can be years later and they’re still hanging onto something that you barely remember.

Don’t confuse criticism with hate. People who care will give advice help you improve.

Tip 1: Not Every Criticism Is Motivated by Hate

A person giving you constructive criticism wants to help you improve and become better.

A hater wants to hurt you and wants you to die.

Determine if love or hate is the basis of the criticism by recognizing who criticized you and how they gave it. What was the intent? Help or harm?

Why Do We Notice the Negative?

You can be in a crowd of ten thousand and give an incredible speech. One critic blasts you on their blog or on Twitter, and what do you notice? You don’t see those hundred positive tweets — you see the one negative.

You can captivate your whole classroom except for one student who has decided to dislike you. You don’t relish 29 joyful, happy, learning kids — you languish because one student (and usually their parents) doesn’t like you. (I’ve been there — and goodness –, it’s hard when this happens!)

Tip 2: Reject Critics Math

Jon Acuff talks about this phenomenon in his book Start: Punch Fear in the Face, Escape Average and Do Work that Matters calls this “critics math.” Jon says:

1 insult + 1,000 compliments = 1 insult

He goes on to tell the story of Larry David, creator of the hit TV show Seinfeld. Larry went to New York and attended a ballgame. When the organizers spotted him in the crowd, they showed his picture on the big screen and played the Seinfeld theme song as the entire stadium stood and applauded.

After the game as Larry walked to his car, a stranger drove by, rolled down his window, and yelled,

“Larry, you suck!”

Which did Larry remember later? The one stranger who said that he sucked.

Are you kidding? One rude person can erase 49,999 giving you a standing ovation?

This math doesn’t make sense.

The first step in overcoming critics math is to realize that you’re doing it and refuse to go there.

Tip 3: Keep Perspective

I deal with the haters by admitting that there’s room enough in this big wide world for both of us.- Good people can dislike me. I can even dislike good people. Good and evil aren’t determined by whether people like you or me. This perspective helps.

I recall a professor in college who drew a little x at the corner of the board. Across the board he drew a cloud.

He points at the cloud and says, “This is the universe.” He walks across the front of the room to the tiny x and tells the class, “This is you.” Then, he says something profound. “Notice that you” (pointing at the x) “are not at the center of the universe” (pointing at the cloud.)

Love is a powerful response to hate.

Tip 4: Center Your Thoughts in Healthy Ways

Nope. I’m not the center of the universe, and neither are you. But we can choose to center our thoughts daily. When hate rears its ugly head — it hurts us. – And yet centering our thoughts gets easier with time. Focus on your goals. We’ve got things to get done!

Tip 5: Focus on the Likers, Not the Haters

Stop focusing on the futile: You probably can’t make the haters like you.

Instead, focus on the people who actually do like you. Spend time cultivating those relationships and perhaps they’ll come to love you (and you them).

Focus on helping and serving others and being kind. Choose to ignore those who may be speaking negatively about you — that can quickly become paranoia. Usually, it turns out that people aren’t even talking about you at all. I hate to tell you what I tell myself: You’re not that important. Keep perspective and keep to your task.

So, decide. We’ve already heard Theodore Roosevelt tell us clearly, “It is not the critic who counts” but why do we give such things power over us? Why should we let haters distract us from living an epic life?

Tip 6: Celebrate Good Times and Progress

My first boss sent a memo to his manager praising my performance. He brought the copy to my desk and I was so excited. I couldn’t believe it. Then, he told me something I’ll never forget.

“Create an ‘atta girl’ folder for those hard days. They’ll come and you’ll need to remember who you are and who you can be. This is your first ‘atta girl.’ Keep it.”

I still have the folder and made one in Evernote so that I can always get to it. “Atta girl” has pulled me through dark days when I failed at something.

We all fall. I fail. You fail. It’s part of life.

Tip 7: Keep Moving Forward

Failure becomes permanent only if we stop trying. It becomes success when we learn from it. It also helps to remember the good days when the bad days come.

But let’s be clear about the difference between failure and criticism. Criticism is not failure. Having a hater is not a failure. Being criticized and having a hater is part of being human.

Sweet Revenge.

Dr. Phil Adler, my favorite professor, always talked about racism and sexism and how to overcome the. He’d tell us that there were people who would not want us to be included in conversations because of our gender or race.

“Be so good that they can’t ignore you,” he said. The best revenge is success and proving them wrong.”

Ever since that moment in class, I’ve repeated this thought when faced with a hater targeting me or my gender.

Tip 8: Be Excellent in Your Work.

Your best revenge against haters is proving them wrong. Succeed and work your best to do a fantastic job at whatever you’re called to do.

Some people want swift justice because their me-centered world demands it. Well, life is a marathon not a sprint. Be a turtle (as I share in Chapter 13 of Reinventing Writing).

Who Hating Really Hurts

Hating hurts the hater most of all. I read a story of the freed slave Frederick Douglass riding a train through Pennsylvania. He was told to ride with the luggage, and several white passengers came back to the luggage car to express how upset they were. Douglass responded by telling them that he was not degraded but that those who did this to him were degrading themselves for treating a fellow human being with disrespect. (Paraphrased from a story included in Up from Slavery by Booker T. Washington.)

Tip 9: Commit Not To Hate

Hating is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

Hating is like tying a dead body to your back — the body doesn’t care that it’s lashed to you, but you bear the burden.

Hating hurts the hater most of all.

When you are bothered by a person’s hate, it gives them power over you. They can rejoice because they ruined your day. Their purpose is wounding you and causing you pain, and they’d probably be happy only if you were dead. Since there’s nothing you can do to make them happy you have to learn to live with it!

Tip 10: Live Life!

And live with it you do! But do more than just live — thrive and succeed and enjoy your life. Fulfill your mission and spend time your loving the 99.9% of people who don’t have a problem with the fact you’re breathing air at this moment.

Life is too short to make a big deal about a small person. And hate does exactly that — it has a way of making the person on the receiving end feel smaller and less incapable of success.

So, my friends — forgive and move on. Do whatever it takes, but let go of hate. If someone hates you, sing the song from Frozen and “let it go.”

Haters are gonna hate. The question is: what will you do about it?

The post What To Do When Someone Hates You appeared first on Cool Cat Teacher Blog by Vicki Davis @coolcatteacher helping educators be excellent every day. Meow!

from Cool Cat Teacher BlogCool Cat Teacher Blog http://www.coolcatteacher.com/what-to-do-when-someone-hates-you/

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thattrashash · 7 years

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Love at first scare

A/N: I never know what to put for this so I’m going to take this opportunity to say requests are always open you can ask questions or make requests here http://thattrashash.tumblr.com/ask it can be any kind of requests, fan art, one shots, continue with a one shot, fake snaps, fake texts, I will try my best. Follow me on twitter at namjoonswife1, on snow at thattrashash, and IG at thattrashash18 also if there are mistakes....oops!

Summary: You and Jackson of GOT7 have been friends for 3 years now. But you’ve never met him in person, and only showed him around five pictures of you because you were very insecure considering the type of girls he would date. You’ve watched him go through his relationships that weren't publicly know. He’s watched you go through hard times because you told your parents how you wanted to move to a new country to explore new things and experience their culture. How ever your parents did not support you and left you out on your own. Jackson wanted to take care of you even though he wasn’t around you. He bought you a nice furnished apartment that looks like the picture below.

Genre: fluff

Word count:

Members: Jackson x reader

Your POV

“(Y/N)! We have a concert today, can you come?” you woke up to read after hearing your phone ring five times. It was Jackson, you sighed because unfortunately you didn’t have enough money to get any tickets. You replied telling him how sorry you were but you couldn’t make it because a week before the tickets went on sale you went on a shopping spree with one of your friends. You though the tickets went on sale two weeks from then. He replied letting you know that it was okay and that he would miss not seeing you there. Suddenly the texting style changed. “Well I don’t care, because my girlfriend is coming” you shook your head and rolled your eyes. Why was Jackson with such a controlling girl? You knew her, because you went to school with her. You started to think how she would react if another person said they loved Jackson. You then got up and went to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. When you went to put some coffee in the coffee maker you noticed there was a note on top, “don’t tell him, you’re welcome! xBambam.” you raised an eyebrow and flipped the paper over. You then sucked in all the air of the room feeling your heart drop and race at the same time. In your hand was a ticket to their concert and a vip pass. You then questioned how he was able to get in your apartment. You then remembered that Jackson had the spare key. You shrugged your shoulders and kept making the coffee. You were so used to waking up early in the morning, it was eight in the morning and the concert started at three. So you had all day. Suddenly you got a little excited, so Bambam was able to get into your apartment....Why not ask Jackson if he could stop by before the concert! You then set down the coffee and quickly ran to your bedroom almost tripping over your own feet and threw yourself on the bed to grab your phone. “Sorry..” was a message that was from Jackson that was on your phone. You didn’t care, you knew it was her...”Jackson! Do you think you could just stop by before your concert!” you were so excited. The both of you have been wanting to meet for forever now. You got up taking your phone with you to the kitchen. Your phone then buzzed and when you looked at you groaned, the message read. “No, I have a girlfriend who is important to me. I know your intentions, and I’m not going to disrespect her.”

Jackson’s POV

“why?” was the only thing he said to her as he watched her toy with his phone. “Well,” she began to say getting up and slowly walking to him, carefully throwing his phone on the couch. “You’re all mine, and I just want to make sure no fishy activity happens babe” she said beginning to unbutton his shirt “why the hell am I with her?” he asked in his mind. He grabbed her hand and put it by her side “we just got up” he said, his voice was cold. He knew what she wanted, it was the only thing she wanted. The only reason he was with her is because she acted like you in the beginning and then slowly turned into this witch who put her spell on him. Any time he told her it was over, she would guilt trip him, or just blackmail him. “Am I not good enough for you Jackson? Is that it?” she asked, putting on her show like always. Her eyes filled with tears just to really get the guilt going. He sighed and looked away from her “You are, but we just woke up. Can I at least eat and drink a cup of coffee first?” she huffed and flipped her hair crossing her arms. “You know I know guys who would love to be in your position..” Jackson gave her the cold shoulder and walked to the kitchen beginning to make coffee. She huffed again and threw herself on the couch next to his phone. He then finished making his coffee and ran one hand through his hair. He was anxious from the performance coming up, he wanted it to be good, but feared it wouldn’t be. He also feared that one day you would get tired of her and stop talking to him. “Ugh! Fuck off!” she yelled at his phone and began to text in a furious manner. “That whore can’t take a hint can she?” Jackson immediately snapped and threw the cup on the floor letting hot coffee and glass go all over the floor. “Get your stuff and get out.” He said standing in front of her. Her puppy eyes suddenly turned on “J-Jackson- why?” she asked as if she was an innocent angel. “You heard me, get your stuff and get out. It’s over. Go ahead and tell the world we dated, go ahead and post pictures of us, go ahead and release those pictures of me. I don’t care. (Y/N) has done nothing wrong to you ever, so you have no reason to call her a whore. You can act innocent all you want, oh and those guys who want to be in my position? Tell them the spot is opened like your legs, cause we’re over.” He then turned giving her a cold shoulder. She got up and grabbed his wrist, he jerked his hand away and grabbed her clothes putting them in her bad. “I’ll make sure you have a room for now.” he said grabbing her luggage and walked to the door. He looked over his shoulder to see if she was following. “So that’s it? You’re just going to throw away 11 months of our relationship?” Jackson shook his head “You’re the one who is throwing it all away because not only did you call someone who I’ve known for a long time a whore, but I caught you last night. There were videos all over snapchat.” her face dropped and tears started to roll down, “Jackson...I’m sorry...I love you, I really do..”

Your POV

“You okay?” Jackson texted you. Her message didn’t bother you, you told him you where alright and asked him if he could stop by. “No unfortunately, I had to deal with her for about three hours, we have to do practice then get ready and do a fan meet then its time for the concert. I’m sorry, I’ll stop by after the concert though.” you couldn’t help but giggle thinking of ways you could surprise him. Your phone then started ringing it was Jackson wanting to face time, no way were you ready to be on camera so you set your phone on the counter and answered making sure you were off screen. “Jackson!” you yelled as loud as possible, he laughed and nodded leaving a sweet smile on his face. “so what are you doing today?” he asked, you looked up at the clock seeing it was eleven and shrugged acting as if you had no plans. “Probably going to go and hang out with (Y/F/N) and watch a couple movies.” he nodded, his smile never leaving “so you guys ended it huh?” you asked he nodded and smiled wider “yep officially done, I caught her last night. While we were doing a fan meeting, she was hooking up with some other guy. He put her on full blast on his snapchat.” you nodded and mumbled “thank god” he chuckled and rubbed at his chest causing his black shirt to become more opened. He then started to walk around his hotel room “why are you hiding bug?” he nicknamed you bug because when you first met Bambam you both face timed Jackson screaming there was a flying bug but neither of you new where it was, he found it funny cause you were scared of a lady bug. “I woke up a little bit ago, I still look bad” his smile dropped and so did his eyes and shook his head “bug, you’re very pretty come on. Show your self” you groaned and told him once you were ready you would show him. He agreed and went on talking about how nervous he was. You threw your phone on the bed and went to your closet grabbing a black baggy shirt you tucked into your black ripped shorts and black high heal sandals that had two thin straps crossing over your foot and wrapping around your upper ankle along with a red mid thigh length sweater jacket. “Bug are you done yet?” he asked setting his phone down to where you are still able to see him as he began to brush his teeth. “almost” you said grabbing your phone keeping your face off the screen and went to the bathroom to start getting ready. “Babe, hurry I got to hang up as soon as I leave the bathroom.” you told him you weren’t ready but quickly showed your face. “Ahh so pretty, I got to go now” he said sighing then he spoke quickly and hung up. Babe? Hmm maybe he’s just used to referring to women as babe. You shrugged and stated getting ready and hummed. You had your hair in loose curls letting it fall in the back and grabbed a black sun hat. You smiled at your reflection then pursed your lips. This outfit could be better...Oh! You then ran to your closet and slipped on your black GOT7 shirt. It was now 2:30pm you rushed to grab your fan light, ticket, VIP pass, and purse. Suddenly there was a knock on your door, you hurried and ran to the door flinging it open. “Are you miss (Y/N)?” the said, who looked like he could be a butler from an old time movie. You slowly nodded wanting him to get out of your way. “Bambam has ordered a limo for you, I will be your driver for the night, are you ready to leave yet?” you nodded and followed him. “The arena is not that far away it will take 20 minutes” you nodded and followed him out to the car getting inside when he opened the door. You began to drive and you looked out the widow watching everything happen. You started to think about Jackson and you soon couldn’t deny it, you loved him. He’s cared about you from so far away, he’s helped you in your most times of need, your conversations were never dull, and even when he had girlfriends his attitude never changed. You started to get nervous as you were getting closer to the arena. You began to mess around with your ticket. Luckily all of the boys have kept your relationships with them off media so you knew no one would be stopping you when you got there. You had fifth row seats, when you walked in one of the security guards looked at you then ran off. He came back and gabbed your arm pulling you to him. He whispered in your ear “This raffle ticket will get you on stage, they are going to do a random draw for seven people to go up on stage. Bambam has your ticket in the sleeve of his jacket he’s going to pretend to pull it out of the bowl. You’re welcome” he then handed you the ticket and smiled at you. You nodded holding onto that ticket for dear life. Suddenly they came on stage, your eyes found Jackson and your heart started to race. They did a few of their performances, and it was now break time....Time for the raffle. Bambam found you and tilted his head towards Jackson. Jaebum was between Jackson and Bambam. Bambam was trying to mouth to you, to go to Jackson when your card got pulled. They then all began to pull tickets and lastly was Bambam. He smirked at you and pulled out your ticket, he read it aloud and you felt your hands begin to shake and sweat. Jackson was busy talking with Mark. Once you reached the stage you decided to walk up behind Jackson then jump on his back. “Jackson!” at first he was scared thinking a crazy fan girl was attacking him, but then he jolted “Bug!” You let out a loud laugh and hugged on tightly to him. He then gripped your legs and put his head down as his eyes began to fill with tears. You hopped down and went in front of him with a smile so big and bright it put the sun and all the stars to shame. With no hesitation he cupped your cheeks softly pressing his lips to yours and keeping it that way for a few seconds. Once he pulled away his smile mirrored yours. Jackson kept your face close to his, all of the sudden the fans started awing, some booing, but mostly screaming. Your name was then shouted by Mark and your attention was then turned to all the boys who were lined up with signs. Each of them had a few words written on them, Bambam’s said “even though we are miles away”, Jaebum’s “I’ve tried to date girls”, Yugyeom “but I’ve realized something.”, Jiyoung “none of them are you”, Youngjae “so with that”, Mark “being said.....”. Jackson looked at you with a soft sweet smile and wrapped one arm around your waist and leaned in pressing his lips to your ear “you’re the only one I think of, care for. Please be mine”

#got7 #got7 bambam #got7 ruined my life #got7 jackson #got7 jinyoung #got7 jaebum #got7 yugyeom #got7 youngjae #got7 mark #jackson #jaebum #youngjae #yugyeom #igot7 #got7 imagines #got7 scenarios #mark #jinyoung #bambam

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airadam · 7 years

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Episode 95 : Record Store Way

"Studying my sickness like the Tuskegee Experiment."

- Ilajide

In a world with all kinds of options for DJs, there's a lot to be said for just two turntables, a mixer, and some crates!

This month's show has more new releases than the average episode, including some local heat. We also have a track from the late Guru (RIP always), and one or two of my headphone favourites finally coming out into the light!

Upcoming Manchester shows mentioned;

London Posse @ Rebellion, May 23rd

Kool G Rap @ Sound Control, June 21st

Twitter: @airadam13

Playlist/Notes

Sean Price : Definition Of God

It's a shame to think that all the Sean Price tracks we'll ever hear are already out in the world somewhere. On this posthumously-released single from this March, Sean blasts the Stu Bangas instrumental with his trademark mixture of rapping dexterity and casual, disrespectful brutality. I know I'm not alone in looking forward to the "Imperius Rex" LP - this is is right up my alley!

Ilajide : Dance Of The Psudo

Ilajide is the man behind the boards for the brilliant Clear Soul Forces, but he's also putting out some very good solo material that's definitely worth your attention! This is a burner from "Five Week Heet III", one of the lead-ups to the "Heet Tape" album release.

Tribeca : Wheel Of Fortune

A favourite of mine for years which I finally got a legit copy of (from the "Subway Series Vol.1" compilation) thanks to the modern convenience of digital purchase! Self-produced as always, the Bronx MC and MPC-batterer tells a tale of a dice game gone very wrong over a fitting 70s sample and some punching drums & bass. I won't give the sample away - to be fair, it's not a hard one to discern - but I do like the way it's been used. Using a three-bar segment for the title breakdown is awkward for a DJ, but it does sound good :)

Rapsody : Kingship

Making a return visit to Rapsody's "She Got Game" mixtape for a short and sweet cut with the legendary DJ Premier. Rapsody has one of those bell-clear voices that works so well for an MC, and lyrics to go along with it. Apparently Premo once tried to give this beat to Ludacris, but it was a little too experimental for him to do anything with!

KING : Red Eye (DJ Spinna Blissed-Out Remix)

My man Agent J from Groovement was up on this three-woman group out of Los Angeles very early, but I'm just getting up to speed on their 2016 debut "We Are King" now. It's a high-quality, ambient-flavoured R&B album with its own kind of flavour, and hopefully it's just a taste of the things yet to come! The great DJ Spinna is on the remix here and gives them some extra bass and head-nod drums to take the original "Red Eye" to new heights.

A.D. Carson : Dissertation (Part I The Introduction)

This project has something of a unique origin, which alone was enough to catch my interest. A.D. Carson was a Ph.D candidate at Clemson University who turned in his dissertation for the Rhetoric, Communication, and Information Design program in an unusual form - a full album. "Owning My Masters : The Rhetoric of Rhymes and Revolutions" is worth a listen on both its musical and academic merits, especially as a "name your price" Bandcamp release. Give a student a few dollars though! This track is a solid opener from the album, and A.D. makes excellent and appropriate use of a sample from "Malcolm X" after the hook.

Pro P : Concrete Jungle

Almost pure drums here from one of Manchester's busiest beatmakers, on this track from the first "Concrete Jungle" beat tape.

Ran Reed ft. Sadat X : The God's Power

Hailing from New Jersey, Ran Reed was one of those guys who put in mad independent work in the mid-90s, with underground 12" releases, guest appearances, and mixtape cuts. Only this year has he finally released his debut album, and while longtime collaborator Nick Wiz contributed several beats, Ran also self-produces many, including this one. A Sadat X guest appearance is always a win, and he provides a nicely contrasting vocal tone.

Children of Zeus : Don't Say A Word

They just keep on killing it. This is the B-side of the "I Can't Wait" 7" and it knocks! Konny Kon and Tyler have a great album in them, and I am 100% here for it whenever it arrives; in the meantime, just follow them and be ahead of the curve.

Raekwon : This Is What It Comes Too (sic)

I couldn't have you thinking that I didn't know which "to" to use :) This is the lead single from Rae's new album "The Wild" (big up Dan Lish on the cover art), the first to have no features from any Wu members whatsoever! Xtreme on the beat, working a classic old-school drum break, and the rhyming is prototypical Raekwon street talk.

Guru ft. Branford Marsalis : Transit Ride

RIP Guru! I definitely wanted to play some Guru this month and was pleased to find a track of his with the same drum break as the preceding cut. He was a pioneer in making links between the Hip-Hop nation and the world of jazz, and the first "Jazzmatazz" was a landmark. Here's another link - Guru and Premier actually lived in Branford Marsalis' house for a while back in the day! That sounds like it could have made for an amazing TV programme :)

Focus : (Entry no.3) CisumovneZ

Georgia's Focus is a beast on the boards. I could happily have played any number of tracks from the "aNALOG iN a dIGITAL wORLD 2" album, but went for this one. I love the manipulation and warping of the beat as the track progresses, with all kinds of stutters and stops - almost like a modern-day, digital version of the Latin Rascals.

Geechi Suede : London Luton

A number clearly inspired by the globetrotting adventures of Camp Lo's Geechi Suede, from the "Fishnet Skyscrapers" mixtape. This one was so long in coming after the release of the single "Ask About Me", I figured it had been shelved altogether - but it finally came out this month. This actual track was recorded/released in 2016 via the Brapp TV platform, and features the production of NYTELIFE, Rexx, and SaL GuoD (all the casing styles there). It's a suitably spacey background for Geechi's abstract freestyling!

Clear Soul Forces : Fan-Ta-Sa-Ro

So talented, it's a bit ridiculous. Detroit's Clear Soul Forces channel the spirit of their hometown heroes Slum Village on this track, as Slum listeners will recognise from the title and the hook. Ilajide supplies the beat, and this tune from their debut "Detroit Revolution(s)" gave just a taste of the great work to come.

J Chambers : Thought From New Mount Street 2

A brand new freestyle from a Manchester artist on the rise as he prepares to release his "Moment of Silence II : The Road to Perdition" mini-album. Gorgeous beat, dope rhymes - what more do you need?

Robert Glasper Experiment ft. Ledisi : Gonna Be Alright (F.T.B.)

Needed something with a certain kind of flavour to follow up the J Chambers cut and I think I found it with this beautiful piece from Robert Glasper's first "Black Radio" album. Top-notch instrumentation as you might have expected, undergirding the vocals of the exceptionally talented singer/songwriter Ledisi. Oh yeah, she acts too :) This track got a Grammy nomination, and rightly so. The meaning of "F.T.B." is "off the record", according to Glasper, so take your own guess - but it was also the title of the song this is based on, from The Robert Glasper Trio's "In My Element" album.

Beatnuts : Gonna Fly (Inst)

From the old "Hydra Beats 5" collection of instrumentals (one of fourteen), just a head-nodder courtesy of Queens' own Beatnuts, some of the most dedicated diggers in the game.

Nas & DJ Shadow : Systematic

I did not see this collaboration coming! One of the greatest ever to pick up a mic, in combination with a legendary producer...on the soundtrack to the "Silicon Valley" TV series? You could have got great odds on that. The beat is funky at the core with the odd glitchy interjection and some synth bass and FX giving it a contemporary feel. Nas can be counted on to come through with the lyrics, and this track is no exception.

Please remember to support the artists you like! The purpose of putting the podcast out and providing the full tracklist is to try and give some light, so do use the songs on each episode as a starting point to search out more material. If you have Spotify in your country it's a great way to explore, but otherwise there's always Youtube and the like. Seeing your favourite artists live is the best way to put money in their pockets, and buy the vinyl/CDs/downloads of the stuff you like the most!

Check out this episode!

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artxyra · 4 years

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The Secret Life of MDC | Part 3

Part 3 - Welcome to Gotham, now get out!

Part 1 | Part 2 |

Arriving in Gotham was just an absolutely massive mess, that quickly turned into a several page report for Marinette to send to the school board the moment she arrived in her temporary dorm at Gotham Academy.

Let recap back to the airport. When everyone got off the plane, Lila was quick to make up an excuse about Bruce Wayne sending her a private limo that she’ll be happy to bring the class along. Of course, Caline Bustier, absently believed the long-time liar telling her students to gather their belongings and for Lila to call the Waynes. It was as if she had completely forgotten the arrival procedures. Arriving in Gotham, proceed to find the bus driver, and meet up with the Gotham Academy Headmistress to retrieve the rest of the plans for the month. Marinette tried to tell Caline that what they were doing was against the procedure, something that she had to memorize for moments like this, only to be lectured about behavior the second she finished talking off to the side.

Then when they finally arrived at the school, Caline had the nerve to lecture her again about not informing her about the bus before being dragged off by the Gotham Academy headmistress, who clearly was not happy with the decisions made before they could even step foot onto the school grounds. Gotham is not a place to dilly dally unless you know the area or a native.

“Do you think, she’ll be fired after this?” Chloe asks while setting her things into the wardrobe as Marinette clicks the save button on her laptop.

“Maybe, no matter what happens, we’re here for a month regardless of the decisions the GA headmistress and Principal De La Fontaine decides in the coming days. All I know as the class president and temp. TA; my job is to help her overlook you guys.” Marinette sighs and closes the laptop's top before giving Chloe her full attention.

“I still can’t believe you graduated early. Though Adrien and I are grateful you managed to stay despite everything.” It was rare moments like these that made Marinette glad that she gave Chloe a second chance. Chloe had apologized one winter when she was freezing to death outside because her parent went on a tropical vacation on her request and decided to allow the staff to take a few days off. It was Sabine and Tom that took the former bully into their arms and made her feel loved, a love that she rarely receives from her parents. Since that day, Chloe takes pride in the honor of being Marinette’s sister just as Adrien did when they took him in also.

“I couldn’t leave you guys to perish in that class. Also, I just didn’t want to give Lie-la the satisfaction of winning.” Marinette says as her phones with the familiar sounds of “The Other Side” by Ruelle. Instantly, Marinette picks up the phone and smiles. “It’s Damian, he wants to go out tonight. Think I have time before—”

“Go, I’ll keep you from trouble, maybe even invite Adrien over if he isn’t doing the same with Jon.” Chloe pushes the noirette out of their room before closing the door behind the designer with a smirk on her lips.

As Marinette makes her way out of the dormitory, little did she know that Lila was just doing the same but for a different reason.

~*~

Damian Wayne @therealbloodheir I had a wonderful night with my beloved. I can’t wait for more nights like these. [Attached is an image of two hands intertwine with each other with the moon shining between them.]

Nette @GothamsFashionSense Replying to @therealbloodheir That sounds like a marriage proposal. Missing you too.

~*~

In the halls of Gotham Academy, conversations buzz around the single fact that Nette was back in Gotham for the first time in weeks. Groups of students gather around a single person, whose phone is out in the open, all gushing about theories on how the date went.

The same can be said for GA’s exchange students who crowd around Lila Rossi like she was the air.

“Gurl, spill, how was the date? You’re tending on twitter, again!” Alya squeals, gripping Lila’s arm.

“Oh you, it was truly romantic. Damiboo took me on this romantic dinner, but the first place we went to didn’t serve any vegetarian meals, and as you know I’m one but he’s not. We left and found another place that was just right.” Her high pitch voices drive a shiver down people spines, well anyone that is in clear hearing distance to the Italian teen's voice range.

“Do they truly believe that she’s Nette. Bitch please, we all know that Nette has dark hair from the back of the head photos on twitter.” A random student scoffs behind the trio.

The trio turns around looking at the person in a new light. The student had long braided blonde hair and wearing the GA uniform. “You’re not fooled? I was pretty sure that she would try and convert you the moment you step foot into the building.” It was Adrien that spoke first.

“I'm Allegra, besides me is Claude and Allen.” The student says shaking hands with Adrien before continuing with, “Anyone with brain cells can tell you that she is not Nette from @GothamsFashionSense.”

Allegra then takes the empty seat beside Marinette.

“Name’s Marinette, these dorks are Adrien and Chloe.” Marinette says, “About the brain cell thing, we’ve been saying that since she joined our class a few years back.”

“It ridiculous, utterly ridiculous, as to how they manage to hang on her every word. And one of them is a self-proclaim reporter. The bitch hasn’t reported anything remotely true since the liar had joined us and don't get me started on her early years.” Chloe places her two cents into the conversation.

This was the start of a blooming relationship.

Claude, Allegra, and Allen were quick to understand the environment that the Paris Trio was living in. An irresponsible, enabling teacher and a class full of idiots. With the Gotham Trio, the Paris Trio was able to understand how Gotham Academy works and learn the ins and outs of specific places. Despite the fact that Marinette vaguely knows just about much.

~*~

“So, how were your first three days at GA?” Dick Grayson asks as the Paris trio who are sitting on the couch inside the living room of Wayne Manor. "Is it about the same as it was when I went?"

“Dicky, I am this close to making heads roll.” Chloe’s fingers are teaching as a look of crazy twitches in her eyes.

“It wasn’t all that bad the first couple of days and then Lila tried to convince GA students that she was me by photoshopping our twitter photos. Other than that, I’m more worried about when Bustier announces that our class has been invited to the upcoming Wayne Gala. I’m already booked with mine and Chloe’s dresses along with Selina’s and Cass’s.” Marinette says, resting her head on Damian’s shoulder as their hands' interlock. Damian places a quick peck on her forehead.

The room was once again oddly silent before Adrien let out a loud giggle.

The family turns to the model who was staring at his phone with the biggest smile on his face. Adrien was no doubt in a group chat with Luka and Jon about upcoming meetings and plans.

“What?” Adrien asks, looking up to the group of extended family members staring at him. They all quickly look away, some whistling while others mess with the person they are next to. “Seriously guys, what?” The whining in Adrien’s voice just made it harder for them to pretend to do something as they hold in a laugh.

“Nothing,” Marinette snickers as Damian brings to play with her hair by braiding strands of it. She always liked it when Damian messed with her hair, he sometimes does something nice, surprising everyone with his styling skills.

“Hey, Pixie-Pop and Pixie-Pop’s friends. When did you guys get in?” It’s Jason, to which majority had forgotten about even though Tim was a close second as he is hovering over a half-full cup of coffee trying to stay awake but isn’t with them in reality. Maybe Marinette should make her special concoction that would knock anyone out for quite some time.

“Hey Mari, can you make the switch?” Dick whispers in the designer’s ear. Marinette huffs agreeing to the older sibling’s request. Damian nearly groans as his girlfriend gets off his lap and walks into the kitchen.

Marinette comes out nearly ten minutes later with a steaming coffee mug in hand. She walks over to Tim and pushes his cup out of his hand and replaces it with hers. Tim, absently, takes a sip. Within seconds he is knocked out, cold.

“I’ll never not be amazed at how fast your drink can knock Tim out,” Dick says as he picks up Tim and exits the room. Marinette shrugs and takes her seat next to Damian.

“When does Cass get back from her trip?” It was Chloe who decided to break the silence between them.

“Before the gala, that’s for sure,” Jason answers as he pulls out the controllers for the game console. He gives Marinette a knowing look, who smirks with mischief in her eyes. He should know better than to play against Marinette.

~*~

It was times like this that made Marinette wish that the school board had investigated Mlle. Bustier years ago, like for example when the liar first tried to get her expelled in college. Yeah, that was such a long time ago.

Today was supposed to be an easy-going day, but for some reason, Lila managed to convince the teachers, Mlle. Bustier specifically, to allow the class to visit a nearby street mall. Mlle. Bustier, of course, agrees despite the GA teachers telling her that it was a bad idea to let the student go out unsupervised in a place they still don’t know much about. Caline laughs it off stating that they’ll be fine, and it’ll be just like walking down the streets in Paris. That added another dash to her inability to be a proper teacher.

Which brings us to the street mall. Lila was going into stores left and right proclaiming to be Damian Wayne’s girlfriend or stating that she is the niece of some high profile celebrity in hopes of getting free or discounted items. That doesn’t dwell well seeing as Gothamites are not as gullible as Parisians.

The Paris Trio along with the GA Trio watch the mess that she was drumming up from afar. Chloe had invited Allegra to join them which then extended to Claude and Allan who wanted to go for the arcade.

Lila even had the nerve to ask Adrien to join her and Alya shopping trips with the underlying message of making him pay. Once being denied on numerous occasions, Alya managed to steal Nino’s wallet in hopes of paying for all their stuff. Yeah, that didn't help their relationship status.

“Alya I told you that money wasn’t for you,” Nino screams into his girlfriend’s face as she tries to come up with an excuse. He was infuriated.

“Nino, baby, if you love me you would have just given me the money. Lila really needed those items for her date with Damian.”

“I don’t care about Lila’s need; she is not my responsibility. In fact, neither are you, Alya. You just spent the money I had saved up for this trip.” Nino had wanted to go into a DJ shop that sold the equipment he wanted and started saving the moment the trip was announced the year before.

“Stop bitching, it was only a couple hundred dollars.”

Oohs and side-eyes make up the crowd they were drawing. It was a free drama tv for them.

“Ooh what do we have here, a lovers quarrel? Now would be the perfect time to spring my new trap.” Suddenly, it was like time freezes.

~*~

Chloe B. @QueenBeeOfParis The best thing about my idiotic classmates is television drama. #savemefromthem

Tina @thepinkmistress I was finding my own business when this shit happens. [Attach is a video clip of a couple arguing and goons dress in green takes over the streets]

Tim Drake’s Bish @rachelcovefe The nerve of this group. Just finished my shift only to be told by some foreigner that she was @GothamsFashionSense like bish please I know you ain't her. #anotherdayingotham

Kimmy @kimmyontheblock Replying to@rachelcovefe OMG same but she then added in that she was Jagged Stone's niece. Um excuse you but we all know that it's @MDCfashion

Mari Needs Coffee @MarinetteMemes So the first relaxing day in Gotham ruined by the Riddler and Lie-la’s fanatics. Yup, so good to be back. #memescomingsoon #goodgrief #imabouttoheadout

Part 4 >>

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#daminette #maribat #teacher assistant au #teacher assistant Marinette AU #ta marinette #fic:The Secret Life of MDC #ml x dc #mlb x dc #dc crossover #ml crossover #damimari

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natiashakirkwood · 7 years

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Your Dreams Are Probably Stupid And Nobody Cares (That’s a Good Thing)

When I was a little kid, I had an idea about what the afterlife would involve.

I thought that after I died, I’d go to some place where a bunch of people, sort of like the chorus in a Greek tragedy, would show me film reels of my most embarrassing and uncool moments — picking my nose on the toilet, the time I farted in my boss’ face, that sort of thing.

It would be an epic circus of my humiliation, painstakingly documented by — who? minor deities? accountants of Hell? all the boys I ever had an awkward crush on? My immature theology was never quite clear on that.

The concept here is that some group of people is watching my every move, cataloguing it for posterity, and really really caring about it.

That sounds dumb, of course.

But isn’t that how we act when it comes to our own self-image?

I mean, isn’t that just basically Twitter, Instagram, and sharing all your workouts to Facebook?

Many of us at some point have operated with the core beliefs that:

We are being closely observed.

We are being closely observed by people who really, really care.

The people who really, really care are judgmental as shit.

We really, really care that they really, really care.

So we have to act in ways that don’t let those people find any flaws. We must be perfect, lest this committee make us sit in a plastic folding chair with our eyes propped open, watching footage of that time we fucked up a Powerpoint and pooped our pants.

Many years ago, every time I worked out, I’d imagine a group of Stumptuous readers tsk-tsking.

“How can she have such a lousy squat?”

“Yes, her butt does look terrible in those pants… and in all pants ever invented.”

“What a poser.”

To be clear, I was working out alone.

By myself.

Invisible to the internet (yes, youngsters, there was a time when that was possible).

Nobody cared about my dreams.

Nobody cared whether I was a bodybuilder or a powerlifter, good at bench pressing, whether I was doing 3 sets of 5 or 5 sets of 3, what % of my 1RM I was using, or what I had for lunch.

For that matter, nobody cared about my cellulite angst, my squat numbers (or any other numbers), my weight, my butt’s shape / size / dimensions / aesthetic correctness, or any other trivial detail of my life.

Unless maybe I stepped on their foot on the subway or played my music too loud or cut them off in traffic, then other people briefly cared about how my trajectory might be interfering with theirs. Until they didn’t care again.

And yet I acted like they cared.

I acted and thought like everyone cared. Deeply.

I acted and thought like the rest of the world was arguing about my relative merits in the same way that old men around the world argue about football on smoky Sunday afternoons in the local café — passionately, with excruciating attention to errors, narratively needlepointing every fine detail of every stat and movement, gesticulating to indicate displeasure with fingers stabbing into the air.

I acted and thought like everyone gave a huge wet-burrito shit about all of it. All of me. All of my life.

My dreams. My worries. My thoughts.

Like my life was some Truman Show with cameras everywhere, even inside my brain.

But it’s not.

Now to be clear, I don’t mean I am alone and unloved.

I’m not hurtling isolated on this bald blue planet through space, silently weeping because there is no God and I can’t address my thank-you letters for a sunny day to any particular cosmic customer service representative.

Well, there is no God, and saying “thank you physics for the photons” doesn’t quite have the same thrill, but the fact that 7 billion people in the world aren’t breathlessly hitting “refresh” to find out what amazing thing I am doing doesn’t mean I live in some nihilist cave.

I’m surrounded by caring friends and family, by people who are interested in what I have to say, and do, and who I am, and my opinions on Manchego cheese (delicious), the Middle East (I can’t even) or Saul Bellow (literary genius).

It’s just that what they love, care about, and are interested in has nothing to do with all the stuff I thought was important.

Stuff like:

How much weight I could lift (or not).

How fast I could run (or waddle).

How high I could jump (ha).

My clothing size.

My weight.

My (in)visible abs.

Whether I was doing X style workout or Y style.

Whether I was eating X diet or Y diet or not at all.

Whether I had been “bad” or “good”.

Whether I had accomplished my desired number of reps and sets.

Whether I had trained my core, or my posterior chain, or my stability, and exactly which method I used.

In fact, talking and worrying about all of the above, or related topics, makes you boring as shit. (Even to people who love you dearly and think the way you say “refrigerator” is delightful.)

In North America, we have a particular conceit. Which is:

We think our dreams are intrinsically valuable because they are our dreams.

If other people critique our dreams, or don’t care about our dreams, or don’t give us the right reaction when we grandly announce that we are following our dreams, we think they are hatin-ass morons who don’t care about our dreams.

Which they should! Because those are our dreams! All dreams are good and amazing and beautiful and worthy of slackjawed wondrous awe!

Stop and think about that for a moment.

Demanding unwavering allegiance to the correctness of dreams is what toddlers do.

Children are fundamentally egocentric. They have no context or comparison. Their small world is everything.

They will build an elaborate fort, announce that it is a spaceship, and scream you straight to hell if you tell them that it’s just a bunch of stupid pillows. You’d better buy in to that pillow ship, my friend.

Now, of course, in children, this is delightful.

I love watching kids create imaginary universes and live them. They encourage all of us cynically defeated adult bastards to believe in magic, if only for a few moments.

I also think imagination is a grand thing in general. I have a solid roster of mental adventure stories, starring myself as a pirate ninja sharpshooter acrobat popstar brain surgeon… or whatever.

But I don’t mix up imagination with reality.

Here’s what mixing up a child’s imagination with adult reality looks like.

You worry about being “good”. Or “bad”.

If you are “good”, it’s mostly for show. And doesn’t last. (Ta daaaa! Aren’t I behaving so much better than my little sister right now?)

If you are “bad”, you make confessions on the internet. (OMG! Here’s what I ate! Soooo naughty! Teehee!)

You think that magic is real — that there is a fairy-dusted mixture of sets and reps and macronutrients that unlocks the special door to Buffland.

You demand that all of us look at you! Look at you! Oh my goodness! You lifted like a big girl! So strong!

Oh dear! You did not lift as much weight as you wanted! So sad! You should punish yourself! You should have a tantrum!

You confuse a given outcome with intrinsic value — an “A” on your spelling test, a gold star for being a good girl, a pat on the head for nice cursive writing, a high-five for your bathroom selfie.

If this isn’t you, and right now you’re chain-smoking Marlboros, leafing through your mutual fund reports, and chuckling in a growly Joan Crawford voice about how you just can’t be arsed to care about anything — congratulations. Enjoy your eccentric, very grown-up performance artist / sociopathic life.

The truth is:

We all have a little bit of small child in our brains.

Most of us want there to be magic.

Most of us want other people to love us and give us gold stars.

Most of us want to perform well.

Most of us want to play by the social rules and win the game.

Most of us don’t want to be ostracized, “get in trouble”, or be the group weirdo.

Most of us probably just need some juice, a cuddle, and a nap.

That’s normal.

We shouldn’t kill off our imaginations.

Again, pirate ninja sharpshooter acrobat popstar brain surgeon. 900 degree Tony Hawk spin!

Rad, right?

We should, however, learn to distinguish child-brain from adult-brain.

And this includes getting clear about what we’re doing, why we’re doing it, and where reality will impose natural and necessary limitations on us.

Think about it this way.

Imagine a 4-square grid.

One dimension is “ego-gratifying”. This runs from “completely self-centered” to “selfless”.

The second dimension is “realistic”. This runs from “could do it right now, now problem” to “you have to break the laws of space and time to make this happen”.

So you can have basically 4 types of things (with lots of stuff in between along a continuum, of course).

Ego-gratifying and unrealistic. Basically you winning the world and having everyone notice. Awesome to imagine; don’t try executing any of these things seriously unless you want to become an obsessive, frustrated a-hole and have crying jags because you can’t free-dive a kilometre or walk around at 5% bodyfat all the time.

Ego-gratifying and realistic. Everyone needs a little bit of this one in their lives. But not too much. Maybe 10-20% of your activities and effort should live here.

Non-ego-gratifying and unrealistic. “World peace” and “Save all the whales” usually lives in here, unless “Save the whales” is really about you building some environmentalist empire, which is not that crazy if you see How To Change The World and realize that social movements involve a lot more dick-waving than you’d expect. Any genital waving bumps it back up to Category 1. Actually Category 3 is sneakily a lot like Category 1. If you’re a coach / trainer “just trying to help” by berating or pushing your clients in a noble martyred struggle against ignorance and sloth, you may think you’re #3 when you’re really #1.

Non-ego-gratifying and realistic. This is where most of your life should be if you want to be happy, sane, and functional. Of course, we’re not looking for complete self-erasure here in Category 4, or some weird trippy Zen state where you serenely declare that all is all.

So what lives in Category 4 — non-ego-gratifying and realistic?

Empathy and compassion — helping other people in ways that they genuinely need and want, as well as having compassion for yourself.

Intrinsic mastery — learning skills that you truly enjoy and find useful, slowly and consistently.

Beginner’s mind — being open to new ideas, learning, expanding your worldview, and being coached.

Seeking, getting, and taking feedback — using data, information, and the evidence of experience to make decisions.

Scientific reasoning — looking at evidence, thinking critically, avoiding magical leaps of logic.

Showing up for practice — just showing up. Plain old showing up. Being there. Putting in the reps. Doing what needs to be done. Not looking for shortcuts; realizing that the practice is the point.

Enjoying things for their own sake — having fun, playing, simply being present.

OK, look, I don’t mean to be a downer.

Living in the non-ego-gratifying real world is awesome.

You’re truly free.

If you know your dreams are silly and that nobody cares about them, YOU get to decide whether you try to manifest them.

YOU get to decide whether they’re worth giving a shit about.

YOU get to decide whether they should live in your head (yay) or live outside (yay), and you know the difference between what’s inside and outside.

If you know your dreams are silly, but you really want to do something, you can choose to replace them with less-silly ones. Get coaching and feedback from people who have the objective expertise to help you, and don’t pout when they guide you gently towards reality.

If you know your dreams are silly and you do them anyway, recognizing that they are utterly ridiculous and probably won’t amount to shit, we call that fun. We call that a hobby. Or an eccentricity. Silly pointless goofing around is how disc golf, extreme ironing, and Roomba Pong got invented. None of it was needed, but it sure does spice up life.

Pointless antics often form the fountain of creativity, as long as you don’t take them too seriously. (Check out the Stupid Shit No-One Needs and Terrible Ideas Hackathon.)

If you know that nobody cares, we also call that fun. Because play can’t be too concerned with the audience.

Most of the time, nobody is judging you because they’re too caught up in their own paranoia about their own embarrassing afterlife blooper reel.

You’re completely liberated from the weight of other people’s imaginary shit-giving.

Even if they are judging you, it’s cursory. It’s a brief blip before they return to their own rumination. So, no harm no foul.

What would you do if there was no “measuring up”?

If there was no social scrutiny?

No Truman Show cameras?

What would you do if, figuratively, you were alone in all the very best ways — the delicious kind of aloneness where you can wear your jammies with the peanut butter stains, and sing I Will Survive in your loudest voice, and pee with the door open, and be like Tom Cruise in Risky Business? That kind of dance-like-nobody’s-watching feeling?

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Take that feeling, and bring it along with you wherever you go.

You don’t have to be alone and drunk-dancing in your underwear to feel it. You can choose to feel it anywhere, any time.

You can nurture that feeling of fundamental freedom and fun in any environment, with any pursuit.

There’s no final exam. There are no judges. There are few rules besides reality requiring that you face it.

And if you fuck it up, well… if there’s no God, there’s probably also no film crew.

Me and some peeps from my boxing class, so concerned with serious appearances and impressing people.

Original Article: Your Dreams Are Probably Stupid And Nobody Cares